clarissa harlowe

or the

history of a young lady

nine volumes

volume i 


 comprehending
 the most important concerns of private life 
 and particularly shewing 
 the distresses that may attend the misconduct
 both of parents and children 
 in relation to marriage 




preface


the following history is given in a series of letters written
principally in a double yet separate correspondence 

between two young ladies of virtue and honor bearing an inviolable
friendship for each other and writing not merely for amusement but
upon the most interesting subjects in which every private family more
or less may find itself concerned and 

between two gentlemen of free lives one of them glorying in his
talents for stratagem and invention and communicating to the other in
confidence all the secret purposes of an intriguing head and resolute
heart 

but here it will be proper to observe for the sake of such as may
apprehend hurt to the morals of youth from the more freely-written
letters that the gentlemen though professed libertines as to the
female sex and making it one of their wicked maxims to keep no faith
with any of the individuals of it who are thrown into their power 
are not however either infidels or scoffers nor yet such as think
themselves freed from the observance of those other moral duties which
bind man to man 

on the contrary it will be found in the progress of the work that
they very often make such reflections upon each other and each upon
himself and his own actions as reasonable beings must make who
disbelieve not a future state of rewards and punishments and who one
day propose to reform one of them actually reforming and by that means
giving an opportunity to censure the freedoms which fall from the gayer
pen and lighter heart of the other 

and yet that other although in unbosoming himself to a select friend 
he discovers wickedness enough to entitle him to general detestation 
preserves a decency as well in his images as in his language which
is not always to be found in the works of some of the most celebrated
modern writers whose subjects and characters have less warranted the
liberties they have taken 

in the letters of the two young ladies it is presumed will be
found not only the highest exercise of a reasonable and practicable
friendship between minds endowed with the noblest principles of
virtue and religion but occasionally interspersed such delicacy of
sentiments particularly with regard to the other sex such instances
of impartiality each freely as a fundamental principle of their
friendship blaming praising and setting right the other as are
strongly to be recommended to the observation of the younger part more
specially of female readers 

the principle of these two young ladies is proposed as an exemplar to
her sex nor is it any objection to her being so that she is not in
all respects a perfect character it was not only natural but it was
necessary that she should have some faults were it only to show the
reader how laudably she could mistrust and blame herself and carry to
her own heart divested of self-partiality the censure which arose from
her own convictions and that even to the acquittal of those because
revered characters whom no one else would acquit and to whose much
greater faults her errors were owing and not to a weak or reproachable
heart as far as it is consistent with human frailty and as far as she
could be perfect considering the people she had to deal with and those
with whom she was inseparably connected she is perfect to have been
impeccable must have left nothing for the divine grace and a purified
state to do and carried our idea of her from woman to angel as such is
she often esteemed by the man whose heart was so corrupt that he could
hardly believe human nature capable of the purity which on every trial
or temptation shone out in her's  sic  

besides the four principal person several others are introduced whose
letters are characteristic and it is presumed that there will be found
in some of them but more especially in those of the chief character
among the men and the second character among the women such strokes of
gayety fancy and humour as will entertain and divert and at the same
time both warn and instruct 

all the letters are written while the hearts of the writers must be
supposed to be wholly engaged in their subjects the events at the time
generally dubious so that they abound not only in critical situations 
but with what may be called instantaneous descriptions and reflections
 proper to be brought home to the breast of the youthful reader as
also with affecting conversations many of them written in the dialogue
or dramatic way 

much more lively and affecting  says one of the principal character 
must be the style of those who write in the height of a present
distress the mind tortured by the pangs of uncertainty the events then
hidden in the womb of fate than the dry narrative unanimated style
of a person relating difficulties and danger surmounted can be the
relater perfectly at ease and if himself unmoved by his own story not
likely greatly to affect the reader 

what will be found to be more particularly aimed at in the following
work is to warn the inconsiderate and thoughtless of the one sex 
against the base arts and designs of specious contrivers of the
other to caution parents against the undue exercise of their natural
authority over their children in the great article of marriage to warn
children against preferring a man of pleasure to a man of probity upon
that dangerous but too-commonly-received notion that a reformed rake
makes the best husband but above all to investigate the highest and
most important doctrines not only of morality but of christianity by
showing them thrown into action in the conduct of the worthy characters 
while the unworthy who set those doctrines at defiance are condignly 
and as may be said consequentially punished 

from what has been said considerate readers will not enter upon the
perusal of the piece before them as if it were designed only to divert
and amuse it will probably be thought tedious to all such as dip into
it expecting a light novel or transitory romance and look upon story
in it interesting as that is generally allowed to be as its sole end 
rather than as a vehicle to the instruction 

different persons as might be expected have been of different
opinions in relation to the conduct of the heroine in particular
situations and several worthy persons have objected to the general
catastrophe and other parts of the history whatever is thought
material of these shall be taken notice of by way of postscript at the
conclusion of the history for this work being addressed to the public
as a history of life and manners those parts of it which are
proposed to carry with them the force of an example ought to be as
unobjectionable as is consistent with the design of the whole and with
human nature 




names of the principal persons


 miss clarissa harlowe a young lady of great beauty and merit 
 robert lovelace esq her admirer 
 james harlowe esq father of clarissa 
 mrs harlowe his lady 
 james harlowe their only son 
 arabella their elder daughter 
 john harlowe esq elder brother of james harlowe sen 
 antony harlowe third brother 
 roger solmes esq an admirer of clarissa favoured by her friends 
 mrs hervey half-sister of mrs harlowe 
 miss dolly hervey her daughter 
 mrs judith norton a woman of great piety and discretion who had a
 principal share in the education of clarissa 
 col wm morden a near relation of the harlowes 
 miss howe the most intimate friend companion and correspondent of
 clarissa 
 mrs howe her mother 
 charles hickman esq an admirer of miss howe 
 lord m uncle to mr lovelace 
 lady sarah sadleir lady betty lawrance half-sisters of lord m 
 miss charlotte montague miss patty montague nieces of the same
 nobleman 
 dr lewen a worthy divine 
 mr elias brand a pedantic young clergyman 
 dr h a humane physician 
 mr goddard an honest and skilful apothecary 
 john belford esq mr lovelace's principal intimate and confidant 
 richard mowbray thomas doleman james tourville thomas belton 
 esqrs libertine friends of mr lovelace 
 mrs moore a widow keeping a lodging-house at hampstead 
 miss rawlins a notable young gentlewoman there 
 mrs bevis a lively young widow of the same place 
 mrs sinclair the pretended name of a private brothel-keeper in
 london 
 captain tomlinson the assumed name of a vile pander to the
 debaucheries of mr lovelace 
 sally martin polly horton assistants of and partners with the
 infamous sinclair 
 dorcas wykes an artful servant at the vile house 





letters of volume i


letter i miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe desires from her the
particulars of the rencounter between mr lovelace and her brother and
of the usage she receives upon it also the whole of her story from the
time lovelace was introduced as a suitor to her sister arabella admires
her great qualities and glories in the friendship between them 

letter ii iii iv clarissa to miss howe gives the requested
particulars together with the grounds of her brother's and sister's
ill-will to her and of the animosity between her brother and
lovelace her mother connives at the private correspondence between
her and lovelace for the sake of preventing greater evils character
of lovelace from an enemy copy of the preamble to her grandfather's
will 

letter v from the same her father mother brother briefly
characterized her brother's consequence in the family wishes miss howe
had encouraged her brother's address endeavors to find excuses for her
father's ill temper and for her mother's passiveness 

letter vi from the same mr symmes mr mullins mr wyerley in
return proposed to her in malice to lovelace and on their being
rejected mr solmes leave given her to visit miss howe for a few days 
her brother's insolent behaviour upon it 

letter vii from the same the harsh reception she meets with on her
return from miss howe solmes's first visit 

letter viii from the same all her family determined in solmes's
favour her aversion to him she rejects him and is forbid going to
church visiting receiving visits or writing to any body out of the
house 

letter ix clarissa to miss howe her expedient to carry on a private
correspondence with miss howe regrets the necessity she is laid under
to take such a clandestine step 

letter x miss howe to clarissa inveighs against the harlowe family
for proposing such a man as solmes characterizes them is jealous
of antony harlowe's visits to her mother rallies her friend on her
supposed regard to lovelace 

letter xi clarissa to miss howe is nettled and alarmed at her
raillery her reasons for not giving way to a passion for lovelace 

letter xii miss howe in reply continues her raillery gives
lovelace's character from mrs fortescue 

letter xiii xiv clarissa to miss howe the views of her family in
favouring the address of solmes her brother's and sister's triumph upon
the difficulties into which they have plunged her 

letter xv miss howe to clarissa she accounts for arabella's malice 
blames her for having given up the power over the estate left her by her
grandfather 

letter xvi xvii clarissa to miss howe offends her father by her
behaviour to solmes in his presence tender conversation between her
mother and her offers to give up all thoughts of lovelace if she may
be freed from solmes's address substance of one of lovelace's letters 
of her answer and of his reply makes a proposal her mother goes down
with it 

letter xviii from the same the proposal rejected her mother affects
severity to her another interesting conversation between them 

letter xix from the same her dutiful motives for putting her estate
into her father's power why she thinks she ought not to have solmes 
afflicted on her mother's account 

letter xx xxi from the same another conference with her mother who
leaves her in anger she goes down to beg her favour solmes comes in 
she offers to withdraw but is forbid what follows upon it 

letter xxii clarissa to miss howe substance of a letter from
lovelace she desires leave to go to church is referred to her brother 
and insultingly refused by him her letter to him his answer 

letter xxiii xxiv xxv from the same her faithful hannah
disgracefully dismissed betty barnes her sister's maid set over her 
a letter from her brother forbidding her to appear in the presence of
any of her relations without leave her answer writes to her mother 
her mother's answer writes to her father his answer 

letter xxvi from the same is desirous to know the opinion lord m s
family have of her substance of a letter from lovelace resenting the
indignities he receives from her relations she freely acquaints him
that he has nothing to expect from her contrary to her duty insists
that his next letter shall be his last 

letter xxvii miss howe to clarissa advises her to resume her estate 
her satirical description of solmes rallies her on her curiosity to
know what opinion lord m and his family have of her ascribes to the
difference in each of their tempers their mutual love gives particulars
of a conversation between her mother and her on clarissa's case 
reflects on the harlowe family and particularly on mrs harlowe for
her passiveness 

letter xxviii clarissa in answer chides her for the liberties she
takes with her relations particularly defends her mother chides her
also for her lively airs to her own mother desires her to treat her
freely but wishes not that she should impute love to her and why 

letter xxix from the same her expostulatory letter to her brother and
sister their answers 

letter xxx from the same exceedingly angry with lovelace on his
coming to their church reflections on pride etc 

letter xxxi mr lovelace to john belford esq pride revenge love 
ambition or a desire of conquest his avowedly predominant passions 
his early vow to ruin as many of the fair sex as he can get into his
power his pretences for it breathes revenge against the harlowe
family glories in his contrivances is passionately in love with
clarissa his high notions of her beauty and merit yet is incensed
against her for preferring her own relations to him clears her 
however of intentional pride scorn haughtiness or want of
sensibility what a triumph over the sex and over her whole family if
he can carry off a lady so watchful and so prudent is resolved if he
cannot have the sister to carry off the brother libertine as he is 
can have no thoughts of any other woman but clarissa warns belford 
mowbray tourville and belton to hold themselves in readiness to
obey his summons on the likelihood there is of room for what he calls
glorious mischief 

letter xxxii xxxiii clarissa to miss howe copies of her letters to
her two uncles and of their characteristic answer her expostulatory
letter to solmes his answer an insolent letter from her brother on
her writing to solmes 

letter xxxiv lovelace to belford he directs him to come down to him 
for what end description of the poor inn he puts up at in disguise and
of the innocent daughter there whom he calls his rosebud he resolves
to spare her pride and policy his motives and not principle ingenuous
reflections on his own vicious disposition he had been a rogue he
says had he been a plough-boy resolves on an act of generosity for
his rosebud by way of atonement as he calls it for some of his bad
actions and for other reasons which appear in the sequel 

letter xxxv from the same his artful contrivances and dealings with
joseph leman his revenge and his love uppermost by turns if the latter
succeeds not he vows that the harlowes shall feel the former although
for it he become an exile from his country forever he will throw
himself into clarissa's presence in the woodhouse if he thought he had
no prospect of her favour he would attempt to carry her off that he
says would be a rape worthy of a jupiter the arts he is resolved to
practise when he sees her in order to engage her future reliance upon
his honour 

letter xxxvi clarissa to miss howe lovelace in disguise surprises
her in the woodhouse her terrors on first seeing him he greatly
engages her confidence as he had designed by his respectful behaviour 

letter xxxvii miss howe to clarissa after rallying her on her not
readily owning the passion which she supposes she has for lovelace she
desires to know how far she thinks him eligible for his best qualities 
how far rejectable for his worst 

letter xxxviii xxxix clarissa to miss howe she disclaims tyranny to
a man who respects her her unhappy situation to be considered in
which the imputed love is held by her parents to be an undutiful and
therefore a criminal passion and where the supposed object of it is a
man of faulty morals is interrupted by a visit from mrs norton who
is sent up to her to influence her in solmes's favour an affecting
conversation between them what passes upon it and after it 

letter xl from the same resumes the requested subject what sort of
man she could have preferred to mr lovelace arguments she has used to
herself in his favour and in his disfavour frankly owns that were he
now a moral man she would prefer him to all the men she ever saw yet
is persuaded that she could freely give up the one man to get rid of
the other as she had offered to her friends her delicacy affected
by miss howe's raillery and why gives her opinion of the force which
figure or person may be allowed to have upon her sex 

letter xli from the same a letter from her mother with patterns of
rich silks in which she entreats her to comply with all their wishes 
what ought to be the principal view of a good wife in adorning her
person her distress begs leave to wait upon her mother alone her
father's angry letter ordering her to prepare for her wedding-day 
solmes requests to see her she refuses all in tumults below upon
it her brother and her sister desire that she may be left to their
management 

letter xlii from the same a very warm dialogue between her sister
and her her sister's envy unnatural behaviour and violence clarissa
sends down proposals in writing to her friends and a letter to her
brother his insolent answer in which he tells her that her proposal
will be considered in full assembly next morning but that if they
shall be complied with he will retire to scotland and never more
return to harlowe-place 

letter xliii clarissa to miss howe hardly doubts but her proposals
will be accepted paints to herself as her relations arrive one by one 
what their deliberations and the result of them will be when they are
all assembled her proposals rejected her sister's cruel insults on the
occasion produce another warm dialogue between them her sister leaves
her in a fury she is greatly disturbed at the contents of a letter from
lovelace 

letter xliv from the same her aunt hervey accompanied by her sister 
makes her a visit farther insults from her sister her aunt's fruitless
pleas in solmes's favour 





the history of clarissa harlowe




letter i

miss anna howe to miss clarissa harlowe jan 10 


i am extremely concerned my dearest friend for the disturbances that
have happened in your family i know how it must hurt you to become
the subject of the public talk and yet upon an occasion so generally
known it is impossible but that whatever relates to a young lady whose
distinguished merits have made her the public care should engage every
body's attention i long to have the particulars from yourself and of
the usage i am told you receive upon an accident you could not help and
in which as far as i can learn the sufferer was the aggressor 

mr diggs the surgeon whom i sent for at the first hearing of the
rencounter to inquire for your sake how your brother was told me 
that there was no danger from the wound if there were none from the
fever which it seems has been increased by the perturbation of his
spirits 

mr wyerley drank tea with us yesterday and though he is far from being
partial to mr lovelace as it may well be supposed yet both he and mr 
symmes blame your family for the treatment they gave him when he went
in person to inquire after your brother's health and to express his
concern for what had happened 

they say that mr lovelace could not avoid drawing his sword and that
either your brother's unskilfulness or passion left him from the very
first pass entirely in his power 

this i am told was what mr lovelace said upon it retreating as he
spoke have a care mr harlowe your violence puts you out of your
defence you give me too much advantage for your sister's sake i will
pass by every thing if 

but this the more provoked his rashness to lay himself open to the
advantage of his adversary who after a slight wound given him in the
arm took away his sword 

there are people who love not your brother because of his natural
imperiousness and fierce and uncontroulable temper these say that
the young gentleman's passion was abated on seeing his blood gush
plentifully down his arm and that he received the generous offices of
his adversary who helped him off with his coat and waistcoat and bound
up his arm till the surgeon could come with such patience as was far
from making a visit afterwards from that adversary to inquire after his
health appear either insulting or improper 

be this as it may every body pities you so steady so uniform in your
conduct so desirous as you always said of sliding through life to the
end of it unnoted and as i may add not wishing to be observed
even for your silent benevolence sufficiently happy in the noble
consciousness which attends it rather useful than glaring your
deserved motto though now to your regret pushed into blaze as i may
say and yet blamed at home for the faults of others how must such a
virtue suffer on every hand yet it must be allowed that your present
trial is but proportioned to your prudence 

as all your friends without doors are apprehensive that some other
unhappy event may result from so violent a contention in which it seems
the families on both sides are now engaged i must desire you to enable
me on the authority of your own information to do you occasional
justice 

my mother and all of us like the rest of the world talk of nobody but
you on this occasion and of the consequences which may follow from the
resentments of a man of mr lovelace's spirit who as he gives out has
been treated with high indignity by your uncles my mother will have
it that you cannot now with any decency either see him or correspond
with him she is a good deal prepossessed by your uncle antony who
occasionally calls upon us as you know and on this rencounter has
represented to her the crime which it would be in a sister to encourage
a man who is to wade into her favour this was his expression through
the blood of her brother 

write to me therefore my dear the whole of your story from the
time that mr lovelace was first introduced into your family and
particularly an account of all that passed between him and your sister 
about which there are different reports some people scrupling not to
insinuate that the younger sister has stolen a lover from the elder and
pray write in so full a manner as may satisfy those who know not so much
of your affairs as i do if anything unhappy should fall out from the
violence of such spirits as you have to deal with your account of all
things previous to it will be your best justification 

you see what you draw upon yourself by excelling all your sex every
individual of it who knows you or has heard of you seems to think
you answerable to her for your conduct in points so very delicate and
concerning 

every eye in short is upon you with the expectation of an example i
wish to heaven you were at liberty to pursue your own methods all
would then i dare say be easy and honourably ended but i dread your
directors and directresses for your mother admirably well qualified
as she is to lead must submit to be led your sister and brother will
certainly put you out of your course 

but this is a point you will not permit me to expatiate upon pardon me
therefore and i have done yet why should i say pardon me when your
concerns are my concerns when your honour is my honour when i love
you as never woman loved another and when you have allowed of that
concern and of that love and have for years which in persons so young
may be called many ranked in the first class of your friends 

your ever grateful and affectionate anna howe 


will you oblige me with a copy of the preamble to the clauses in your
grandfather's will in your favour and allow me to send it to my aunt
harman she is very desirous to see it yet your character has so
charmed her that though a stranger to you personally she assents to
the preference given you in that will before she knows the testator's
reasons for giving you that preference 




letter ii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe harlowe-place jan 13 


how you oppress me my dearest friend with your politeness i cannot
doubt your sincerity but you should take care that you give me not
reason from your kind partiality to call in question your judgment you
do not distinguish that i take many admirable hints from you and have
the art to pass them upon you for my own for in all you do in all you
say nay in your very looks so animated you give lessons to one
who loves you and observes you as i love you and observe you without
knowing that you do so pray my dear be more sparing of your praise
for the future lest after this confession we should suspect that you
secretly intend to praise yourself while you would be thought only to
commend another 

our family has indeed been strangely discomposed discomposed it has
been in tumults ever since the unhappy transaction and i have borne
all the blame yet should have had too much concern from myself had i
been more justly spared by every one else 

for whether it be owing to a faulty impatience having been too
indulgently treated to be inured to blame or to the regret i have to
hear those censured on my account whom it is my duty to vindicate i
have sometimes wished that it had pleased god to have taken me in my
last fever when i had every body's love and good opinion but oftener
that i had never been distinguished by my grandfather as i was since
that distinction has estranged from me my brother's and sister's
affections at least has raised a jealousy with regard to the
apprehended favour of my two uncles that now-and-then overshadows their
love 

my brother being happily recovered of his fever and his wound in a
hopeful way although he has not yet ventured abroad i will be as
particular as you desire in the little history you demand of me but
heaven forbid that any thing should ever happen which may require it to
be produced for the purpose you mention 

i will begin as you command with mr lovelace's address to my sister 
and be as brief as possible i will recite facts only and leave you
to judge of the truth of the report raised that the younger sister has
robbed the elder 

it was in pursuance of a conference between lord m and my uncle antony 
that mr lovelace  my father and mother not forbidding  paid his respect
to my sister arabella my brother was then in scotland busying himself
in viewing the condition of the considerable estate which was left him
there by his generous godmother together with one as considerable in
yorkshire i was also absent at my dairy-house as it is called busied
in the accounts relating to the estate which my grandfather had
the goodness to devise to me and which once a year was left to my
inspection although i have given the whole into my father's power 


 her grandfather in order to invite her to him as often as
 her other friends would spare her indulged her in erecting
 and fitting up a diary-house in her own taste when
 finished it was so much admired for its elegant simplicity
 and convenience that the whole seat before of old time 
 from its situation called the grove was generally known by
 the name of the dairy-house her grandfather in particular
 was fond of having it so called 


my sister made me a visit there the day after mr lovelace had been
introduced and seemed highly pleased with the gentleman his birth his
fortune in possession a clear 2000l a year as lord m had assured
my uncle presumptive heir to that nobleman's large estate his great
expectations from lady sarah sadleir and lady betty lawrence who with
his uncle interested themselves very warmly he being the last of his
line to see him married 

so handsome a man o her beloved clary  for then she was ready
to love me dearly from the overflowings of her good humour on his
account he was but too handsome a man for her were she but as
amiable as somebody there would be a probability of holding his
affections for he was wild she heard very wild very gay loved
intrigue but he was young a man of sense would see his error could
she but have patience with his faults if his faults were not cured by
marriage 

thus she ran on and then wanted me to see the charming man  as she
called him again concerned that she was not handsome enough for
him  with a sad thing that the man should have the advantage of
the woman in that particular  but then stepping to the glass she
complimented herself that she was very well that there were many
women deemed passable who were inferior to herself that she was always
thought comely and comeliness let her tell me having not so much
to lose as beauty had would hold when that would evaporate or fly
off nay for that matter   and again she turned to the glass  her
features were not irregular her eyes not at all amiss  and i remember
they were more than usually brilliant at that time nothing in short 
to be found fault with though nothing very engaging she doubted was
there clary 

excuse me my dear i never was thus particular before no not to you 
nor would i now have written thus freely of a sister but that she makes
a merit to my brother of disowning that she ever liked him as i shall
mention hereafter and then you will always have me give you minute
descriptions nor suffer me to pass by the air and manner in which
things are spoken that are to be taken notice of rightly observing 
that air and manner often express more than the accompanying words 

i congratulated her upon her prospects she received my compliments with
a great deal of self-complacency 

she liked the gentleman still more at his next visit and yet he made no
particular address to her although an opportunity was given him for
it this was wondered at as my uncle has introduced him into our family
declaredly as a visitor to my sister but as we are ever ready to make
excuses when in good humour with ourselves for the perhaps not unwilful
slights of those whose approbation we wish to engage so my sister found
out a reason much to mr lovelace's advantage for his not improving
the opportunity that was given him it was bashfulness truly in him 
 bashfulness in mr lovelace my dear   indeed gay and lively as he
is he has not the look of an impudent man but i fancy it is many 
many years ago since he was bashful 

thus however could my sister make it out upon her word she believed
mr lovelace deserved not the bad character he had as to women he was
really to her thinking a modest man he would have spoken out she
believed but once or twice as he seemed to intend to do so he was
under so agreeable a confusion such a profound respect he seemed to
shew her a perfect reverence she thought she loved dearly that a man
in courtship should shew a reverence to his mistress' so indeed we all
do i believe and with reason since if i may judge from what i
have seen in many families there is little enough of it shewn
afterwards and she told my aunt hervey that she would be a little
less upon the reserve next time he came she was not one of those
flirts not she who would give pain to a person that deserved to be
well-treated and the more pain for the greatness of his value for
her  i wish she had not somebody whom i love in her eye 

in his third visit bella governed herself by this kind and considerate
principle so that according to her own account of the matter the man
might have spoken out but he was still bashful he was not able to
overcome this unseasonable reverence so this visit went off as the
former 

but now she began to be dissatisfied with him she compared his general
character with this his particular behaviour to her and having never
been courted before owned herself puzzled how to deal with so odd a
lover what did the man mean she wondered had not her uncle brought
him declaredly as a suitor to her it could not be bashfulness now she
thought of it since he might have opened his mind to her uncle if he
wanted courage to speak directly to her not that she cared much for
the man neither but it was right surely that a woman should be put
out of doubt early as to a man's intentions in such a case as this from
his own mouth but truly she had begun to think that he was more
solicitous to cultivate her mamma's good opinion than hers every
body she owned admired her mother's conversation but he was mistaken
if he thought respect to her mother only would do with her and
then for his own sake surely he should put it into her power to
be complaisant to him if he gave her reason to approve of him this
distant behaviour she must take upon herself to say was the more
extraordinary as he continued his visits and declared himself
extremely desirous to cultivate a friendship with the whole family and
as he could have no doubt about her sense if she might take upon her to
join her own with the general opinion he having taken great notice of 
and admired many of her good things as they fell from her lips reserves
were painful she must needs say to open and free spirits like hers 
and yet she must tell my aunt  to whom all this was directed that
she should never forget what she owed to her sex and to herself were
mr lovelace as unexceptionable in his morals as in his figure and were
he to urge his suit ever so warmly 

i was not of her council i was still absent and it was agreed upon
between my aunt hervey and her that she was to be quite solemn and shy
in his next visit if there were not a peculiarity in his address to
her 

but my sister it seems had not considered the matter well this was not
the way as it proved to be taken for matters of mere omission with a
man of mr lovelace's penetration nor with any man since if love has
not taken root deep enough to cause it to shoot out into declaration if
an opportunity be fairly given for it there is little room to expect 
that the blighting winds of anger or resentment will bring it forward 
then my poor sister is not naturally good-humoured this is too
well-known a truth for me to endeavor to conceal it especially from
you she must therefore i doubt have appeared to great disadvantages
when she aimed to be worse tempered than ordinary 

how they managed it in their next conversation i know not one would be
tempted to think by the issue that mr lovelace was ungenerous enough
to seek the occasion given and to improve it yet he thought fit to
put the question too but she says it was not till by some means
or other she knew not how he had wrought her up to such a pitch of
displeasure with him that it was impossible for her to recover herself
at the instant nevertheless he re-urged his question as expecting
a definitive answer without waiting for the return of her temper 
or endeavouring to mollify her so that she was under a necessity of
persisting in her denial yet gave him reason to think she did not
dislike his address only the manner of it his court being rather made
to her mother than to herself as if he was sure of her consent at any
time 


 see mr lovelace's letter no xxxi in which he briefly
 accounts for his conduct in this affair 


a good encouraging denial i must own as was the rest of her plea to
wit a disinclination to change her state exceedingly happy as she
was she never could be happier  and such-like consenting negatives 
as i may call them and yet not intend a reflection upon my sister for
what can any young creature in the like circumstances say when she is
not sure but a too-ready consent may subject her to the slights of a sex
that generally values a blessing either more or less as it is obtained
with difficulty or ease miss biddulph's answer to a copy of verse from
a gentleman reproaching our sex as acting in disguise is not a bad
one although you may perhaps think it too acknowledging for the female
character 

 ungen'rous sex to scorn us if we're kind 
 and yet upbraid us if we seem severe 
 do you t' encourage us to tell our mind 
 yourselves put off disguise and be sincere 
 you talk of coquetry your own false hearts
 compel our sex to act dissembling parts 

here i am obliged to lay down my pen i will soon resume it 




letter iii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe jan 13 14 


and thus as mr lovelace thought fit to take it had he his answer from
my sister it was with very great regret as he pretended  i doubt
the man is an hypocrite my dear  that he acquiesced in it so much
determinedness such a noble firmness in my sister that there was no
hope of prevailing upon her to alter sentiments she had adopted on full
consideration  he sighed as bella told us when he took his leave of
her profoundly sighed grasped her hand and kissed it with such an
ardour withdrew with such an air of solemn respect she could almost
find it in her heart although he had vexed her to pity him  a good
intentional preparative to love this pity since at the time she
little thought that he would not renew his offer 

he waited on my mother after he had taken leave of bella and reported
his ill success in so respectful a manner as well with regard to my
sister as to the whole family and with so much concern that he was
not accepted as a relation to it that it left upon them all my brother
being then as i have said in scotland impressions in his favour and
a belief that this matter would certainly be brought on again but mr 
lovelace going up directly to town where he staid a whole fortnight 
and meeting there with my uncle antony to whom he regretted his niece's
cruel resolution not to change her state it was seen that there was a
total end of the affair 

my sister was not wanting to herself on this occasion she made a
virtue of necessity and the man was quite another man with her a vain
creature too well knowing his advantages yet those not what she had
conceived them to be cool and warm by fits and starts an ague-like
lover a steady man a man of virtue a man of morals was worth a
thousand of such gay flutterers her sister clary might think it worth
her while perhaps to try to engage such a man she had patience she
was mistress of persuasion and indeed to do the girl justice had
something of a person but as for her she would not have a man of whose
heart she could not be sure for one moment no not for the world and
most sincerely glad was she that she had rejected him 

but when mr lovelace returned into the country he thought fit to visit
my father and mother hoping as he told them that however unhappy
he had been in the rejection of the wished-for alliance he might be
allowed to keep up an acquaintance and friendship with a family which he
should always respect and then unhappily as i may say was i at home
and present 

it was immediately observed that his attention was fixed on me my
sister as soon as he was gone in a spirit of bravery seemed desirous
to promote his address should it be tendered 

my aunt hervey was there and was pleased to say we should make the
finest couple in england if my sister had no objection no indeed 
with a haughty toss was my sister's reply it would be strange if she
had after the denial she had given him upon full deliberation 

my mother declared that her only dislike of his alliance with either
daughter was on account of his reputed faulty morals 

my uncle harlowe that his daughter clary as he delighted to call me
from childhood would reform him if any woman in the world could 

my uncle antony gave his approbation in high terms but referred as my
aunt had done to my sister 

she repeated her contempt of him and declared that were there not
another man in england she would not have him she was ready on the
contrary she could assure them to resign her pretensions under hand
and seal if miss clary were taken with his tinsel and if every one
else approved of his address to the girl 

my father indeed after a long silence being urged by my uncle antony
to speak his mind said that he had a letter from his son on his
hearing of mr lovelace's visits to his daughter arabella which he had
not shewn to any body but my mother that treaty being at an end when
he received it that in this letter he expressed great dislike to an
alliance with mr lovelace on the score of his immoralities that he
knew indeed there was an old grudge between them but that being
desirous to prevent all occasions of disunion and animosity in his
family he would suspend the declaration of his own mind till his son
arrived and till he had heard his further objections that he was the
more inclined to make his son this compliment as mr lovelace's general
character gave but too much ground for his son's dislike of him adding 
that he had hear so he supposed had every one that he was a very
extravagant man that he had contracted debts in his travels and
indeed he was pleased to say he had the air of a spendthrift 

these particulars i had partly from my aunt hervey and partly from my
sister for i was called out as soon as the subject was entered upon 
when i returned my uncle antony asked me how i should like mr 
lovelace every body saw he was pleased to say that i had made a
conquest 

i immediately answered that i did not like him at all he seemed to
have too good an opinion both on his person and parts to have any
regard to his wife let him marry whom he would 

my sister particularly was pleased with this answer and confirmed it to
be just with a compliment to my judgment for it was hers 

but the very next day lord m came to harlowe-place  i was then absent  
and in his nephew's name made a proposal in form declaring that it was
the ambition of all his family to be related to ours and he hoped his
kinsman would not have such an answer on the part of the younger sister 
as he had on that of the elder 

in short mr lovelace's visits were admitted as those of a man who had
not deserved disrespect from our family but as to his address to
me with a reservation as above on my father's part that he would
determine nothing without his son my discretion as to the rest was
confided in for still i had the same objections as to the man nor
would i when we were better acquainted hear any thing but general talk
from him giving him no opportunity of conversing with me in private 

he bore this with a resignation little expected from his natural temper 
which is generally reported to be quick and hasty unused it seems
from childhood to check or controul a case too common in considerable
families where there is an only son and his mother never had any
other child but as i have heretofore told you i could perceive 
notwithstanding this resignation that he had so good an opinion of
himself as not to doubt that his person and accomplishments would
insensibly engage me and could that be once done he told my aunt
hervey he should hope from so steady a temper that his hold in my
affections would be durable while my sister accounted for his patience
in another manner which would perhaps have had more force if it had
come from a person less prejudiced that the man was not fond of
marrying at all that he might perhaps have half a score mistresses and
that delay might be as convenient for his roving as for my well-acted
indifference  that was her kind expression 

whatever was his motive for a patience so generally believed to be out
of his usual character and where the object of his address was supposed
to be of fortune considerable enough to engage his warmest attention 
he certainly escaped many mortifications by it for while my father
suspended his approbation till my brother's arrival mr lovelace
received from every one those civilities which were due to his birth 
and although we heard from time to time reports to his disadvantage with
regard to morals yet could we not question him upon them without giving
him greater advantages in his own opinion than the situation he was in
with us would justify to prudence since it was much more likely that
his address would not be allowed of than that it would 

and thus was he admitted to converse with our family almost upon his own
terms for while my friends saw nothing in his behaviour but what was
extremely respectful and observed in him no violent importunity 
they seemed to have taken a great liking to his conversation while i
considered him only as a common guest when he came and thought myself
no more concerned in his visits not at his entrance and departure than
any other of the family 

but this indifference on my side was the means of procuring him one
very great advantage since upon it was grounded that correspondence by
letters which succeeded and which had it been to be begun when the
family animosity broke out would never have been entered into on my
part the occasion was this 

my uncle hervey has a young gentleman intrusted to his care whom he has
thoughts of sending abroad a year or two hence to make the grand tour 
as it is called and finding mr lovelace could give a good account
of every thing necessary for a young traveller to observe upon such an
occasion he desired him to write down a description of the courts and
countries he had visited and what was most worthy of curiosity in them 

he consented on condition that i would direct his subjects as he
called it and as every one had heard his manner of writing commended 
and thought his narratives might be agreeable amusements in winter
evenings and that he could have no opportunity particularly to address
me directly in them since they were to be read in full assembly before
they were given to the young gentleman i made the less scruple to
write and to make observations and put questions for our further
information still the less perhaps as i love writing and those who do 
are fond you know of occasions to use the pen and then having
ever one's consent and my uncle hervey's desire that i would write 
i thought that if i had been the only scrupulous person it would have
shewn a particularity that a vain man might construe to his advantage 
and which my sister would not fail to animadvert upon 

you have seen some of these letters and have been pleased with this
account of persons places and things and we have both agreed that he
was no common observer upon what he had seen 

my sister allowed that the man had a tolerable knack of writing and
describing and my father who had been abroad in his youth said that
his remarks were curious and shewed him to be a person of reading 
judgment and taste 

thus was a kind of correspondence begun between him and me with general
approbation while every one wondered at and was pleased with his
patient veneration of me for so they called it however it was not
doubted but he would soon be more importunate since his visits were
more frequent and he acknowledged to my aunt hervey a passion for me 
accompanied with an awe that he had never known before to which he
attributed what he called his but seeming acquiescence with my father's
pleasure and the distance i kept him at and yet my dear this may be
his usual manner of behaviour to our sex for had not my sister at first
all his reverence 

mean time my father expecting his importunity kept in readiness the
reports he had heard in his disfavour to charge them upon him then as
so many objections to address and it was highly agreeable to me that he
did so it would have been strange if it were not since the person who
could reject mr wyerley's address for the sake of his free opinions 
must have been inexcusable had she not rejected another's for his freer
practices 

but i should own that in the letters he sent me upon the general
subject he more than once inclosed a particular one declaring his
passionate regards for me and complaining with fervour enough of my
reserves but of these i took not the least notice for as i had not
written to him at all but upon a subject so general i thought it was
but right to let what he wrote upon one so particular pass off as if i
had never seen it and the rather as i was not then at liberty from
the approbation his letters met with to break off the correspondence 
unless i had assigned the true reason for doing so besides with all
his respectful assiduities it was easy to observe if it had not been
his general character that his temper is naturally haughty and violent 
and i had seen too much of that untractable spirit in my brother to like
it in one who hoped to be still more nearly related to me 

i had a little specimen of this temper of his upon the very occasion i
have mentioned for after he had sent me a third particular letter with
the general one he asked me the next time he came to harlowe-place 
if i had not received such a one from him i told him i should never
answer one so sent and that i had waited for such an occasion as he had
now given me to tell him so i desired him therefore not to write again
on the subject assuring him that if he did i would return both and
never write another line to him 

you can't imagine how saucily the man looked as if in short he was
disappointed that he had not made a more sensible impression upon me 
nor when he recollected himself as he did immediately what a visible
struggle it cost him to change his haughty airs for more placid ones 
but i took no notice of either for i thought it best to convince him 
by the coolness and indifference with which i repulsed his forward hopes
 at the same time intending to avoid the affectation of pride or
vanity that he was not considerable enough in my eyes to make me take
over-ready offence at what he said or at his haughty looks in other
words that i had not value enough for him to treat him with peculiarity
either by smiles or frowns indeed he had cunning enough to give me 
undesignedly a piece of instruction which taught me this caution for
he had said in conversation once that if a man could not make a woman
in courtship own herself pleased with him it was as much and oftentimes
more to his purpose to make her angry with him 

i must break off here but will continue the subject the very first
opportunity mean time i am

your most affectionate friend and servant cl harlowe 




letter iv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe jan 15 


such my dear was the situation mr lovelace and i were in when my
brother arrived from scotland 

the moment mr lovelace's visits were mentioned to him he without
either hesitation or apology expressed his disapprobation of them he
found great flaws in his character and took the liberty to say in so
many words that he wondered how it came into the heads of his uncles
to encourage such a man for either of his sisters at the same time
returning his thanks to my father for declining his consent till he
arrived in such a manner i thought as a superior would do when he
commended an inferior for having well performed his duty in his absence 

he justified his avowed inveteracy by common fame and by what he had
known of him at college declaring that he had ever hated him ever
should hate him and would never own him for a brother or me for a
sister if i married him 

that early antipathy i have heard accounted for in this manner 

mr lovelace was always noted for his vivacity and courage and no less 
it seems for the swift and surprising progress he made in all parts of
literature for diligence in his studies in the hours of study he
had hardly his equal this it seems was his general character at the
university and it gained him many friends among the more learned while
those who did not love him feared him by reason of the offence his
vivacity made him too ready to give and of the courage he shewed in
supporting the offence when given which procured him as many followers
as he pleased among the mischievous sort no very amiable character 
you'll say upon the whole 

but my brother's temper was not more happy his native haughtiness could
not bear a superiority so visible and whom we fear more than love we
are not far from hating and having less command of his passions than
the other he was evermore the subject of his perhaps indecent
ridicule so that every body either from love or fear siding with his
antagonist he had a most uneasy time of it while both continued in the
same college it was the less wonder therefore that a young man who is
not noted for the gentleness of his temper should resume an antipathy
early begun and so deeply rooted 

he found my sister who waited but for the occasion ready to join him
in his resentments against the man he hated she utterly disclaimed
all manner of regard for him never liked him at all his estate was
certainly much incumbered it was impossible it should be otherwise so
entirely devoted as he was to his pleasures he kept no house had no
equipage nobody pretended that he wanted pride the reason therefore
was easy to be guessed at  and then did she boast of and my brother
praised her for refusing him and both joined on all occasions to
depreciate him and not seldom made the occasions their displeasure
against him causing every subject to run into this if it began not with
it 

i was not solicitous to vindicate him when i was not joined in their
reflection i told them i did not value him enough to make a difference
in the family on his account and as he was supposed to have given
much cause for their ill opinion of him i thought he ought to take the
consequence of his own faults 

now and then indeed when i observed that their vehemence carried them
beyond all bounds of probability in their charges against him i thought
it but justice to put in a word for him but this only subjected me
to reproach as having a prepossession in his favour which i would not
own so that when i could not change the subject i used to retire
either to my music or to my closet 

their behaviour to him when they could not help seeing him was very
cold and disobliging but as yet not directly affrontive for they were
in hopes of prevailing upon my father to forbid his visits but as there
was nothing in his behaviour that might warrant such a treatment of
a man of his birth and fortune they succeeded not and then they were
very earnest with me to forbid them i asked what authority i had to
take such a step in my father's house and when my behaviour to him was
so distant that he seemed to be as much the guest of any other person
of the family themselves excepted as mine in revenge they told me 
that it was cunning management between us and that we both understood
one another better than we pretended to do and at last they gave such a
loose to their passions all of a sudden as i may say that instead of
withdrawing as they used to do when he came they threw themselves in
his way purposely to affront him 


 the reason of this their more openly shown animosity is
 given in letter xiii 


mr lovelace you may believe very ill brooked this but nevertheless
contented himself to complain of it to me in high terms however 
telling me that but for my sake my brother's treatment of him was not
to be borne 

i was sorry for the merit this gave him in his own opinion with me and
the more as some of the affronts he received were too flagrant to be
excused but i told him that i was determined not to fall out with
my brother if i could help it whatever faults he had and since they
could not see one another with temper should be glad that he would not
throw himself in my brother's way and i was sure my brother would not
seek him 

he was very much nettled at this answer but said he must bear his
affronts if i would have it so he had been accused himself of violence
in his temper but he hoped to shew on this occasion that he had a
command of his passions which few young men so highly provoked would
be able to shew and doubted not but it would be attributed to a proper
motive by a person of my generosity and penetration 

my brother had just before with the approbation of my uncles employed
a person related to a discharged bailiff or steward of lord m who had
had the management of some part of mr lovelace's affairs from which
he was also dismissed by him to inquire into his debts after his
companions into his amours and the like 

my aunt hervey in confidence gave me the following particulars of what
the man had said of him 

that he was a generous landlord that he spared nothing for solid and
lasting improvements upon his estate and that he looked into his own
affairs and understood them that he had been very expensive when
abroad and contracted a large debt for he made no secret of his
affairs yet chose to limit himself to an annual sum and to decline
equipage in order to avoid being obliged to his uncle and aunts from
whom he might have what money he pleased but that he was very jealous
of their controul had often quarrels with them and treated them so
freely that they were all afraid of him however that his estate was
never mortgaged as my brother had heard it was his credit was always
high and the man believed he was by this time near upon if not quite 
clear of the world 

he was a sad gentleman he said as to women if his tenants had
pretty daughters they chose to keep them out of his sight he believed
he kept no particular mistress for he had heard newelty that was the
man's word was every thing with him but for his uncle's and aunt's
teazings the man fancied he would not think of marriage he was never
known to be disguised with liquor but was a great plotter and a great
writer that he lived a wild life in town by what he had heard had six
or seven companions as bad as himself whom now and then he brought down
with him and the country was always glad when they went up again he
would have it that although passionate he was good-humoured loved
as well to take a jest as to give one and would rally himself upon
occasion the freest of any man he ever knew 

this was his character from an enemy for as my aunt observed every
thing the man said commendably of him came grudgingly with a must needs
say to do him justice etc while the contrary was delivered with a free
good-will and this character as a worse was expected though this was
bad enough not answering the end of inquiring after it my brother and
sister were more apprehensive than before that his address would be
encouraged since the worst part of it was known or supposed when he
was first introduced to my sister 

but with regard to myself i must observe in his disfavour that 
notwithstanding the merit he wanted to make with me for his patience
upon my brother's ill-treatment of him i owed him no compliments
for trying to conciliate with him not that i believe it would have
signified any thing if he had made ever such court either to him or to
my sister yet one might have expected from a man of his politeness and
from his pretensions you know that he would have been willing to try 
instead of which he shewed such a contempt both of my brother and my
sister especially my brother as was construed into a defiance of
them and for me to have hinted at an alteration in his behaviour to my
brother was an advantage i knew he would have been proud of and which
therefore i had no mind to give him but i doubted not that having so
very little encouragement from any body his pride would soon take fire 
and he would of himself discontinue his visits or go to town where 
till he came acquainted with our family he used chiefly to reside and
in this latter case he had no reason to expect that i would receive 
much less answer his letters the occasions which had led me to receive
any of his being by this time over 

but my brother's antipathy would not permit him to wait for such an
event and after several excesses which mr lovelace still returned
with contempt and a haughtiness too much like that of the aggressor my
brother took upon himself to fill up the door-way once when he came as
if to oppose his entrance and upon his asking for me demanded what
his business was with his sister 

the other with a challenging air as my brother says told him he
would answer a gentleman any question but he wished that mr james
harlowe who had of late given himself high airs would remember that he
was not now at college 

just then the good dr lewen who frequently honours me with a visit of
conversation as he is pleased to call it and had parted with me in my
own parlour came to the door and hearing the words interposed both
having their hands upon their swords and telling mr lovelace where
i was he burst by my brother to come to me leaving him chafing he
said like a hunted boar at bay 

this alarmed us all my father was pleased to hint to mr lovelace 
that he wished he would discontinue his visits for the peace-sake of the
family and i by his command spoke a great deal plainer 

but mr lovelace is a man not easily brought to give up his purpose 
especially in a point wherein he pretends his heart is so much engaged 
and no absolute prohibition having been given things went on for a
little while as before for i saw plainly that to have denied myself to
his visits which however i declined receiving as often as i could was
to bring forward some desperate issue between the two since the offence
so readily given on one side was brooked by the other only out of
consideration to me 

and thus did my brother's rashness lay me under an obligation where i
would least have owed it 

the intermediate proposals of mr symmes and mr mullins both in turn 
encouraged by my brother induced him to be more patient for a while 
as nobody thought me over-forward in mr lovelace's favour for he hoped
that he should engage my father and uncles to approve of the one or the
other in opposition to the man he hated but when he found that i
had interest enough to disengage myself from the addresses of those
gentlemen as i had before he went to scotland and before mr lovelace
visited here of mr wyerley's he then kept no measures and first set
himself to upbraid me for supposed prepossession which he treated as
if it were criminal and then to insult mr lovelace in person at mr 
edward symmes's the brother of the other symmes two miles off and
no good dr lewen being there to interpose the unhappy rencounter
followed my brother was disarmed as you have heard and on being
brought home and giving us ground to suppose he was much worse hurt
than he really was and a fever ensuing every one flamed out and all
was laid at my door 

mr lovelace for three days together sent twice each day to inquire
after my brother's health and although he received rude and even
shocking returns he thought fit on the fourth day to make in person
the same inquiries and received still greater incivilities from my two
uncles who happened to be both there my father also was held by force
from going to him with his sword in his hand although he had the gout
upon him 

i fainted away with terror seeing every one so violent and hearing mr 
lovelace swear that he would not depart till he had made my uncles ask
his pardon for the indignities he had received at their hands a door
being held fast locked between him and them my mother all the time
was praying and struggling to with-hold my father in the great parlour 
meanwhile my sister who had treated mr lovelace with virulence came
in to me and insulted me as fast as i recovered but when mr lovelace
was told how ill i was he departed nevertheless vowing revenge 

he was ever a favourite with our domestics his bounty to them and
having always something facetious to say to each had made them all of
his party and on this occasion they privately blamed every body else 
and reported his calm and gentlemanly behaviour till the provocations
given him ran very high in such favourable terms that those reports 
and my apprehensions of the consequence of this treatment induced me to
read a letter he sent me that night and it being written in the most
respectful terms offering to submit the whole to my decision and to
govern himself entirely by my will to answer it some days after 

to this unhappy necessity was owing our renewed correspondence as i
may call it yet i did not write till i had informed myself from mr 
symmes's brother that he was really insulted into the act of drawing
his sword by my brother's repeatedly threatening upon his excusing
himself out of regard to me to brand me ir he did not and by all the
inquiry i could make that he was again the sufferer from my uncles in a
more violent manner than i have related 

the same circumstances were related to my father and other relations by
mr symmes but they had gone too far in making themselves parties
to the quarrel either to retract or forgive and i was forbidden to
correspond with him or to be seen a moment in his company 

one thing however i can say but that in confidence because my mother
commanded me not to mention it that expressing her apprehension of
the consequences of the indignities offered to mr lovelace she told
me she would leave it to my prudence to do all i could to prevent the
impending mischief on one side 

i am obliged to break off but i believe i have written enough to answer
very fully all that you have required of me it is not for a child
to seek to clear her own character or to justify her actions at the
expense of the most revered ones yet as i know that the account of
all those further proceedings by which i may be affected will be
interesting to so dear a friend who will communicate to others no more
than what is fitting i will continue to write as i have opportunity 
as minutely as we are used to write to each other indeed i have
no delight as i have often told you equal to that which i take in
conversing with you by letter when i cannot in person 

mean time i cannot help saying that i am exceedingly concerned to
find that i am become so much the public talk as you tell me i am your
kind your precautionary regard for my fame and the opportunity you
have given me to tell my own story previous to any new accident which
heaven avert is so like the warm friend i have ever found in my dear
miss howe that with redoubled obligation you bind me to be

your ever grateful and affectionate clarissa harlowe 


copy of the requested preamble to the clauses in her grandfather's will 
inclosed in the preceding letter 


as the particular estate i have mentioned and described above is
principally of my own raising as my three sons have been uncommonly
prosperous and are very rich the eldest by means of the unexpected
benefits he reaps from his new found mines the second by what has as
unexpectedly fallen in to him on the deaths of several relations of
his present wife the worthy daughter by both sides of very honourable
families over and above the very large portion which he received with
her in marriage my son antony by his east-india traffic and successful
voyages as furthermore my grandson james will be sufficiently provided
for by his grandmother lovell's kindness to him who having no near
relations hath assured me that she hath as well by deed of gift as
by will left him both her scottish and english estates for never
was there a family more prosperous in all its branches blessed be god
therefore and as my said son james will very probably make it up to
my grand-daughter arabella to whom i intend no disrespect nor have
reason for she is a very hopeful and dutiful child and as my sons 
john and antony seem not inclined to a married life so that my son
james is the only one who has children or is likely to have any for
all these reasons and because my dearest and beloved grand-daughter
clarissa hath been from her infancy a matchless young creature in her
duty to me and admired by all who knew her as a very extraordinary
child i must therefore take the pleasure of considering her as my own
peculiar child and this without intending offence and i hope it
will not be taken as any since my son james can bestow his favours
accordingly and in greater proportion upon his son james and upon his
daughter arabella 

these i say are the reasons which move me to dispose of the
above-described estate in the precious child's favour who is the
delight of my old age and i verily think has contributed by her
amiable duty and kind and tender regards to prolong my life 

wherefore it is my express will and commandment and i enjoin my said
three sons john james and antony and my grandson james and my
grand-daughter arabella as they value my blessing and will regard my
memory and would wish their own last wills and desires to be fulfilled
by their survivors that they will not impugn or contest the following
bequests and devises in favour of my said grand-daughter clarissa 
although they should not be strictly conformable to law or to the forms
thereof nor suffer them to be controverted or disputed on any pretence
whatsoever 

and in this confidence etc etc etc 




letter v

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe jan 20


i have been hindered from prosecuting my intention neither nights nor
mornings have been my own my mother has been very ill and would have
no other nurse but me i have not stirred from her bedside for she kept
her bed and two nights i had the honour of sharing it with her 

her disorder was a very violet colic the contentions of these fierce 
these masculine spirits and the apprehension of mischiefs that may
arise from the increasing animosity which all here have against mr 
lovelace and his too well known resenting and intrepid character she
cannot bear then the foundations laid as she dreads for jealousy and
heart-burnings in her own family late so happy and so united afflict
exceedingly a gentle and sensible mind which has from the beginning on
all occasions sacrificed its own inward satisfaction to outward peace 
my brother and sister who used very often to jar are now so entirely
one and are so much together caballing was the word that dropt from
my mother's lips as if at unawares that she is very fearful of the
consequences that may follow to my prejudice perhaps is her kind
concern since she sees that they behave to me every hour with more and
more shyness and reserve yet would she but exert that authority which
the superiority of her fine talents gives her all these family feuds
might perhaps be extinguished in their but yet beginnings especially as
she may be assured that all fitting concessions shall be made by me 
not only as my brother and sister are my elders but for the sake of so
excellent and so indulgent a mother 

for if i may say to you my dear what i would not to any other person
living it is my opinion that had she been of a temper that would have
borne less she would have had ten times less to bear than she has had 
no commendation you'll say of the generosity of those spirits which
can turn to its own disquiet so much condescending goodness 

upon my word i am sometimes tempted to think that we may make the world
allow for and respect us as we please if we can but be sturdy in our
wills and set out accordingly it is but being the less beloved for it 
that's all and if we have power to oblige those we have to do with it
will not appear to us that we are our flatterers will tell us any thing
sooner than our faults or what they know we do not like to hear 

were there not truth in this observation is it possible that my brother
and sister could make their very failings their vehemences of such
importance to all the family how will my son how will my nephew take
this or that measure what will he say to it let us consult him about
it  are references always previous to every resolution taken by his
superiors whose will ought to be his well may he expect to be treated
with this deference by every other person when my father himself 
generally so absolute constantly pays it to him and the more since his
godmother's bounty has given independence to a spirit that was before
under too little restraint but whither may these reflections lead
me i know you do not love any of us but my mother and me and being
above all disguises make me sensible that you do not oftener than i
wish ought i then to add force to your dislikes of those whom i wish
you to like of my father especially for he alas has some excuse
for his impatience of contradiction he is not naturally an ill-tempered
man and in his person and air and in his conversation too when not
under the torture of a gouty paroxysm every body distinguishes the
gentleman born and educated 

our sex perhaps must expect to bear a little uncourtliness shall i call
it from the husband whom as the lover they let know the preference
their hearts gave him to all other men say what they will of
generosity being a manly virtue but upon my word my dear i have ever
yet observed that it is not to be met with in that sex one time in ten
that it is to be found in ours but my father was soured by the cruel
distemper i have named which seized him all at once in the very prime
of life in so violent a manner as to take from the most active of
minds as his was all power of activity and that in all appearance for
life it imprisoned as i may say his lively spirits in himself 
and turned the edge of them against his own peace his extraordinary
prosperity adding to his impatiency those i believe who want the
fewest earthly blessings most regret that they want any 

but my brother what excuse can be made for his haughty and morose
temper he is really my dear i am sorry to have occasion to say it an
ill-temper'd young man and treats my mother sometimes indeed he is not
dutiful but possessing every thing he has the vice of age mingled
with the ambition of youth and enjoys nothing but his own haughtiness
and ill-temper i was going to say yet again am i adding force to your
dislikes of some of us once my dear it was perhaps in your power to
have moulded him as you pleased could you have been my sister then
had i friend in a sister but no wonder that he does not love you now 
who could nip in the bud and that with a disdain let me say too
much of kin to his haughtiness a passion that would not have wanted
a fervour worthy of the object and which possibly would have made him
worthy 

but no more of this i will prosecute my former intention in my next 
which i will sit down to as soon as breakfast is over dispatching this
by the messenger whom you have so kindly sent to inquire after us on my
silence mean time i am 


your most affectionate and obliged friend and servant cl harlowe 




letter vi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe harlowe-place jan 20 


i will now resume my narrative of proceedings here my brother being
in a good way although you may be sure that his resentments are rather
heightened than abated by the galling disgrace he has received my
friends my father and uncles however if not my brother and sister 
begin to think that i have been treated unkindly my mother been so good
as to tell me this since i sent away my last 

nevertheless i believe they all think that i receive letters from mr 
lovelace but lord m being inclined rather to support than to blame his
nephew they seem to be so much afraid of mr lovelace that they do
not put it to me whether i do or not conniving on the contrary as it
should seem at the only method left to allay the vehemence of a spirit
which they have so much provoked for he still insists upon satisfaction
from my uncles and this possibly for he wants not art as the best way
to be introduced again with some advantage into our family and indeed
my aunt hervey has put it to my mother whether it were not best to
prevail upon my brother to take a turn to his yorkshire estate which he
was intending to do before and to stay there till all is blown over 

but this is very far from being his intention for he has already
began to hint again that he shall never be easy or satisfied till i
am married and finding neither mr symmes nor mr mullins will be
accepted has proposed mr wyerley once more on the score of his
great passion for me this i have again rejected and but yesterday he
mentioned one who has applied to him by letter making high offers this
is mr solmes rich solmes you know they call him but this application
has not met with the attention of one single soul 

if none of his schemes of getting me married take effect he has
thoughts i am told of proposing to me to go to scotland that as the
compliment is i may put his house there in such order as our own is in 
but this my mother intends to oppose for her own sake because having
relieved her as she is pleased to say of the household cares for
which my sister you know has no turn they must again devolve upon her
if i go and if she did not oppose it i should for believe me i have
no mind to be his housekeeper and i am sure were i to go with him i
should be treated rather as a servant than a sister perhaps not the
better because i am his sister and if mr lovelace should follow me 
things might be worse than they are now 

but i have besought my mother who is apprehensive of mr lovelace's
visits and for fear of whom my uncles never stir out without arms and
armed servants my brother also being near well enough to go abroad 
to procure me permission to be your guest for a fortnight or so will
your mother think you my dear give me leave 

i dare not ask to go to my dairy-house as my good grandfather would
call it for i am now afraid of being thought to have a wish to enjoy
that independence to which his will has entitled me and as matter are
situated such a wish would be imputed to my regard to the man to whom
they have now so great an antipathy and indeed could i be as easy and
happy here as i used to be i would defy that man and all his sex and
never repent that i have given the power of my fortune into my father's
hands 


 


just now my mother has rejoiced me with the news that my requested
permission is granted every one thinks it best that i should go to you 
except my brother but he was told that he must not expect to rule in
every thing i am to be sent for into the great parlour where are my
two uncles and my aunt hervey and to be acquainted with this concession
in form 

you know my dear that there is a good deal of solemnity among us 
but never was there a family more united in its different branches than
ours our uncles consider us as their own children and declare that it
is for our sakes that they live single so that they are advised
with upon every article relating to us or that may affect us it is
therefore the less wonder at a time when they understand that mr 
lovelace is determined to pay us an amicable visit as he calls it but
which i am sure cannot end amicably that they should both be consulted
upon the permission i had desired to attend you 


 


i will acquaint you with what passed at the general leave given me to be
your guest and yet i know that you will not love my brother the better
for my communication but i am angry with him myself and cannot help
it and besides it is proper to let you know the terms i go upon and
their motives for permitting me to go 

clary said my mother as soon as i entered the great parlour your
request to go to miss howe's for a few days has been taken into
consideration and granted 

much against my liking i assure you said my brother rudely
interrupting her 

son james said my father and knit his brows 

he was not daunted his arm was in a sling he often has the mean art
to look upon that when any thing is hinted that may be supposed to lead
toward the least favour to or reconciliation with mr lovelace let the
girl then  i am often the girl with him  be prohibited seeing that vile
libertine 

nobody spoke 

do you hear sister clary taking their silence for approbation of what
he had dictated you are not to receive visits from lord m s nephew 

every one still remained silent 

do you so understand the license you have miss interrogated he 

i would be glad sir said i to understand that you are my
brother and that you would understand that you are only my brother 

o the fond fond heart with a sneer of insult lifting up his hands 

sir said i to my father to your justice i appeal if i have deserved
reflection let me be not spared but if i am to be answerable for the
rashness 

no more no more of either side said my father you are not to receive
the visits of that lovelace though nor are you son james to reflect
upon your sister she is a worthy child 

sir i have done replied he and yet i have her honour at heart as
much as the honour of the rest of the family 

and hence sir retorted i your unbrotherly reflections upon me 

well but you observe miss said he that it is not i but your father 
that tells you that you are not to receive the visits of that lovelace 

cousin harlowe said my aunt hervey allow me to say that my cousin
clary's prudence may be confided in 

i am convinced it may joined my mother 

but aunt but madam put in my sister there is no hurt i presume in
letting my sister know the condition she goes to miss howe upon since 
if he gets a nack of visiting her there 

you may be sure interrupted my uncle harlowe he will endeavour to see
her there 

so would such an impudent man here said my uncle antony and tis
better done there than here 

better no where said my father i command you turning to me on pain
of displeasure that you see him not at all 

i will not sir in any way of encouragement i do assure you not at
all if i can properly avoid it 

you know with what indifference said my mother she has hitherto seen
him her prudence may be trusted to as my sister hervey says 

with what appa rent indifference drawled my brother 

son james said my father sternly 

i have done sir said he but again in a provoking manner he reminded
me of the prohibition 

thus ended the conference 

will you engage my dear that the hated man shall not come near your
house but what an inconsistence is this when they consent to my
going thinking his visits here no otherwise to be avoided but if he
does come i charge you never to leave us alone together 

as i have no reason to doubt a welcome from your good mother i will put
every thing in order here and be with you in two or three days 

mean time i am your most affectionate and obliged clarissa harlowe 




letter vii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe  after her return from her  
harlowe-place feb 20 


i beg your excuse for not writing sooner alas my dear i have sad
prospects before me my brother and sister have succeeded in all their
views they have found out another lover for me an hideous one yet
he is encouraged by every body no wonder that i was ordered home so
suddenly at an hour's warning no other notice you know than what
was brought with the chariot that was to carry me back it was for
fear as i have been informed  an unworthy fear   that i should have
entered into any concert with mr lovelace had i known their motive for
commanding me home apprehending tis evident that i should dislike
the man they had to propose to me 

and well might they apprehend so for who do you think he is no
other than that solmes could you have believed it and they are all
determined too my mother with the rest dear dear excellence how
could she be thus brought over when i am assured that on his first
being proposed she was pleased to say that had mr solmes the indies
in possession and would endow me with them she should not think him
deserving of her clarissa 

the reception i met with at my return so different from what i used to
meet with on every little absence  and now i had been from them three
weeks  convinced me that i was to suffer for the happiness i had had
in your company and conversation for that most agreeable period i will
give you an account of it 

my brother met me at the door and gave me his hand when i stepped out
of the chariot he bowed very low pray miss favour me i thought it
in good humour but found it afterwards mock respect and so he led
me in great form i prattling all the way inquiring of every body's
health although i was so soon to see them and there was hardly time
for answers into the great parlour where were my father mother my
two uncles and sister 

i was struck all of a heap as soon as i entered to see a solemnity
which i had been so little used to on the like occasions in the
countenance of every dear relation they all kept their seats i ran
to my father and kneeled then to my mother and met from both a cold
salute from my father a blessing but half pronounced my mother indeed
called me child but embraced me not with her usual indulgent ardour 

after i had paid my duty to my uncles and my compliments to my sister 
which she received with solemn and stiff form i was bid to sit down 
but my heart was full and i said it became me to stand if i could
stand upon a reception so awful and unusual i was forced to turn my
face from them and pull out my handkerchief 

my unbrotherly accuser hereupon stood forth and charged me with having
received no less than five or six visits at miss howe's from the
man they had all so much reason to hate  that was the expression  
notwithstanding the commands i had had to the contrary and he bid me
deny it if i could 

i had never been used i said to deny the truth nor would i now i
owned i had in the three weeks passed seen the person i presumed he
meant oftener than five or six times  pray hear me brother said i for
he was going to flame out  but he always asked for mrs or miss howe 
when he came 

i proceeded that i had reason to believe that both mrs howe and miss 
as matters stood would much rather have excused his visits but they
had more than once apologized that having not the same reason my papa
had to forbid him their house his rank and fortune entitled him to
civility 

you see my dear i made not the pleas i might have made 

my brother seemed ready to give a loose to his passion my father put
on the countenance which always portends a gathering storm my uncles
mutteringly whispered and my sister aggravatingly held up her hands 
while i begged to be heard out and my mother said let the child that
was her kind word be heard 

i hoped i said there was no harm done that it became not me to
prescribe to mrs or miss howe who should be their visitors that mrs 
howe was always diverted with the raillery that passed between miss and
him that i had no reason to challenge her guest for my visitor as i
should seem to have done had i refused to go into their company when he
was with them that i had never seen him out of the presence of one or
both of those ladies and had signified to him once on his urging a
few moments' private conversation with me that unless a reconciliation
were effected between my family and his he must not expect that i would
countenance his visits much less give him an opportunity of that sort 

i told him further that miss howe so well understood my mind that she
never left me a moment while mr lovelace was there that when he came 
if i was not below in the parlour i would not suffer myself to be
called to him although i thought it would be an affectation which would
give him an advantage rather than the contrary if i had left company
when he came in or refused to enter into it when i found he would stay
any time 

my brother heard me out with such a kind of impatience as shewed he was
resolved to be dissatisfied with me say what i would the rest as the
event has proved behaved as if they would have been satisfied had
they not further points to carry by intimidating me all this made it
evident as i mentioned above that they themselves expected not my
voluntary compliance and was a tacit confession of the disagreeableness
of the person they had to propose 

i was no sooner silent than my brother swore although in my father's
presence swore unchecked either by eye or countenance that for his
part he would never be reconciled to that libertine and that he would
renounce me for a sister if i encouraged the addresses of a man so
obnoxious to them all 

a man who had like to have been my brother's murderer my sister said 
with a face even bursting with restraint of passion 

the poor bella has you know a plump high-fed face if i may be allowed
the expression you i know will forgive me for this liberty of speech
sooner than i can forgive myself yet how can one be such a reptile as
not to turn when trampled upon 

my father with vehemence both of action and voice  my father has you
know a terrible voice when he is angry  told me that i had met with too
much indulgence in being allowed to refuse this gentleman and the other
gentleman and it was now his turn to be obeyed 

very true my mother said and hoped his will would not now be disputed
by a child so favoured 

to shew they were all of a sentiment my uncle harlowe said he hoped
his beloved niece only wanted to know her father's will to obey it 

and my uncle antony in his rougher manner added that surely i would
not give them reason to apprehend that i thought my grandfather's
favour to me had made me independent of them all if i did he would
tell me the will could be set aside and should 

i was astonished you must needs think whose addresses now thought i 
is this treatment preparative to mr wyerley's again or whose and
then as high comparisons where self is concerned sooner than low 
come into young people's heads be it for whom it will this is wooing
as the english did for the heiress of scotland in the time of edward
the sixth but that it could be for solmes how should it enter into my
head 

i did not know i said that i had given occasion for this harshness 
i hoped i should always have a just sense of every one's favour to me 
superadded to the duty i owed as a daughter and a niece but that i was
so much surprised at a reception so unusual and unexpected that i hoped
my papa and mamma would give me leave to retire in order to recollect
myself 

no one gainsaying i made my silent compliments and withdrew leaving
my brother and sister as i thought pleased and as if they wanted to
congratulate each other on having occasioned so severe a beginning to be
made with me 

i went up to my chamber and there with my faithful hannah deplored the
determined face which the new proposal it was plain they had to make me
wore 

i had not recovered myself when i was sent for down to tea i begged
my maid to be excused attending but on the repeated command went down
with as much cheerfulness as i could assume and had a new fault to
clear myself of for my brother so pregnant a thing is determined
ill-will by intimations equally rude and intelligible charged my
desire of being excused coming down to sullens because a certain
person had been spoken against upon whom as he supposed my fancy ran 

i could easily answer you sir said i as such a reflection deserves 
but i forbear if i do not find a brother in you you shall have a
sister in me 

pretty meekness bella whisperingly said looking at my brother and
lifting up her lip in contempt 

he with an imperious air bid me deserve his love and i should be sure
to have it 

as we sat my mother in her admirable manner expatiated upon brotherly
and sisterly love indulgently blamed my brother and sister for having
taken up displeasure too lightly against me and politically if i may
say so answered for my obedience to my father's will the it would be
all well my father was pleased to say then they should dote upon me 
was my brother's expression love me as well as ever was my sister's 
and my uncles that i then should be the pride of their hearts but 
alas what a forfeiture of all these must i make 

this was the reception i had on my return from you 

mr solmes came in before we had done tea my uncle antony presented
him to me as a gentleman he had a particular friendship for my uncle
harlowe in terms equally favourable for him my father said mr solmes
is my friend clarissa harlowe my mother looked at him and looked at
me now-and-then as he sat near me i thought with concern i at her 
with eyes appealing for pity at him when i could glance at him with
disgust little short of affrightment while my brother and sister mr 
solmes'd him and sirr'd yet such a wretch but i will at present only
add my humble thanks and duty to your honoured mother to whom i will
particularly write to express the grateful sense i have of her goodness
to me and that i am

your ever obliged cl harlowe 




letter viii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe feb 24 


they drive on here at a furious rate the man lives here i think 
he courts them and is more and more a favourite such terms such
settlements that's the cry 

o my dear that i had not reason to deplore the family fault immensely
rich as they all are but this i may the more unreservedly say to you 
as we have often joined in the same concern i for a father and uncles 
you for a mother in every other respect faultless 

hitherto i seem to be delivered over to my brother who pretends as
great a love to me as ever 

you may believe i have been very sincere with him but he affects
to rally me and not to believe it possible that one so dutiful and
discreet as his sister clary can resolve to disoblige all her friends 

indeed i tremble at the prospect before me for it is evident that they
are strangely determined 

my father and mother industriously avoid giving me opportunity of
speaking to them alone they ask not for my approbation intended as it
should seem to suppose me into their will and with them i shall hope
to prevail or with nobody they have not the interest in compelling me 
as my brother and sister have i say less therefore to them reserving
my whole force for an audience of my father if he will permit me a
patient ear how difficult is it my dear to give a negative where both
duty and inclination join to make one wish to oblige 

i have already stood the shock of three of this man's particular visits 
besides my share in his more general ones and find it is impossible
i should ever endure him he has but a very ordinary share of
understanding is very illiterate knows nothing but the value of
estates and how to improve them and what belongs to land-jobbing and
husbandry yet i am as one stupid i think they have begun so cruelly
with me that i have not spirit enough to assert my own negative 

they had endeavoured it seems to influence my good mrs norton before i
came home so intent are they to carry their point and her opinion
not being to their liking she has been told that she would do well to
decline visiting here for the present yet she is the person of all the
world next to my mother the most likely to prevail upon me were the
measures they are engaged in reasonable measures or such as she could
think so 

my aunt likewise having said that she did not think her niece could ever
be brought to like mr solmes has been obliged to learn another lesson 

i am to have a visit from her to-morrow and since i have refused so
much as to hear from my brother and sister what the noble settlements
are to be she is to acquaint me with the particulars and to receive
from me my determination for my father i am told will not have
patience but to suppose that i shall stand in opposition to his will 

mean time it has been signified to me that it will be acceptable if i
do not think of going to church next sunday 

the same signification was made for me last sunday and i obeyed they
are apprehensive that mr lovelace will be there with design to come
home with me 

help me dear miss howe to a little of your charming spirit i never
more wanted it 

the man this solmes you may suppose has no reason to boast of his
progress with me he has not the sense to say any thing to the purpose 
his courtship indeed is to them and my brother pretends to court me
as his proxy truly i utterly to my brother reject his address but
thinking a person so well received and recommended by all my family 
entitled to good manners all i say against him is affectedly attributed
to coyness and he not being sensible of his own imperfections 
believes that my avoiding him when i can and the reserves i express 
are owing to nothing else for as i said all his courtship is to
them and i have no opportunity of saying no to one who asks me not the
question and so with an air of mannish superiority he seems rather to
pity the bashful girl than to apprehend that he shall not succeed 


february 25 


i have had the expected conference with my aunt 

i have been obliged to hear the man's proposals from her and have been
told also what their motives are for espousing his interest with so much
warmth i am even loth to mention how equally unjust it is for him to
make such offers or for those i am bound to reverence to accept of
them i hate him more than before one great estate is already obtained
at the expense of the relations to it though distant relations my
brother's i mean by his godmother and this has given the hope 
however chimerical that hope of procuring others and that my own at
least may revert to the family and yet in my opinion the world is
but one great family originally it was so what then is this narrow
selfishness that reigns in us but relationship remembered against
relationship forgot 

but here upon my absolute refusal of him upon any terms have i had
a signification made me that wounds me to the heart how can i tell it
you yet i must it is my dear that i must not for a month to come or
till license obtained correspond with any body out of the house 

my brother upon my aunt's report made however as i am informed 
in the gentlest manner and even giving remote hopes which she had no
commission from me to give brought me in authoritative terms the
prohibition 

not to miss howe said i 

no not to miss howe madam tauntingly for have you not acknowledged 
that lovelace is a favourite there 

see my dear miss howe 

and do you think brother this is the way 

do you look to that but your letters will be stopt i can tell
you and away he flung 

my sister came to me soon after sister clary you are going on in a
fine way i understand but as there are people who are supposed to
harden you against your duty i am to tell you that it will be taken
well if you avoid visits or visitings for a week or two till further
order 

can this be from those who have authority 

ask them ask them child with a twirl of her finger i have delivered
my message your father will be obeyed he is willing to hope you to be
all obedience and would prevent all incitements to refractoriness 

i know my duty said i and hope i shall not find impossible condition
annexed to it 

a pert young creature vain and conceited she called me i was the only
judge in my own wise opinion of what was right and fit she for her
part had long seen into my specious ways and now i should shew every
body what i was at bottom 

dear bella said i hands and eyes lifted up why all this dear dear
bella why 

none of your dear dear bella's to me i tell you i see through your
witchcrafts  that was her strange word  and away she flung adding as
she went and so will every body else very quickly i dare say 

bless me said i to myself what a sister have i how have i deserved
this 

then i again regretted my grandfather's too distinguishing goodness to
me 


feb 25 in the evening 


what my brother and sister have said against me i cannot tell but i am
in heavy disgrace with my father 

i was sent for down to tea i went with a very cheerful aspect but had
occasion soon to change it 

such a solemnity in every body's countenance my mother's eyes were
fixed upon the tea-cups and when she looked up it was heavily as if
her eye-lids had weights upon them and then not to me my father sat
half-aside in his elbow-chair that his head might be turned from me 
his hands clasped and waving as it were up and down his fingers 
poor dear gentleman in motion as if angry to the very ends of them my
sister was swelling my brother looked at me with scorn having measured
me as i may say with his eyes as i entered from head to foot my aunt
was there and looked upon me as if with kindness restrained bending
coldly to my compliment to her as she sat and then cast an eye first on
my brother then on my sister as if to give the reason  so i am willing
to construe it  of her unusual stiffness bless me my dear that they
should choose to intimidate rather than invite a mind till now not
thought either unpersuadable or ungenerous 

i took my seat shall i make tea madam to my mother i always used 
you know my dear to make tea 

no a very short sentence in one very short word was the expressive
answer and she was pleased to take the canister in her own hand 

my brother bid the footman who attended leave the room i he said 
will pour out the water 

my heart was up in my mouth i did not know what to do with myself what
is to follow thought i 

just after the second dish out stept my mother a word with you sister
hervey taking her in her hand presently my sister dropt away then my
brother so i was left alone with my father 

he looked so very sternly that my heart failed me as twice or thrice
i would have addressed myself to him nothing but solemn silence on all
hands having passed before 

at last i asked if it were his pleasure that i should pour him out
another dish 

he answered me with the same angry monosyllable which i had received
from my mother before and then arose and walked about the room i
arose too with intent to throw myself at his feet but was too much
overawed by his sternness even to make such an expression of my duty to
him as my heart overflowed with 

at last as he supported himself because of his gout on the back of a
chair i took a little more courage and approaching him besought him
to acquaint me in what i had offended him 

he turned from me and in a strong voice clarissa harlowe said he 
know that i will be obeyed 

god forbid sir that you should not i have never yet opposed your
will 

nor i your whimsies clarissa harlowe interrupted he don't let me
run the fate of all who shew indulgence to your sex to be the more
contradicted for mine to you 

my father you know my dear has not any more than my brother a kind
opinion of our sex although there is not a more condescending wife in
the world than my mother 

i was going to make protestations of duty no protestations girl no
words i will not be prated to i will be obeyed i have no child i
will have no child but an obedient one 

sir you never had reason i hope 

tell me not what i never had but what i have and what i shall have 

good sir be pleased to hear me my brother and sister i fear 

your brother and sister shall not be spoken against girl they have a
just concern for the honour of my family 

and i hope sir 

hope nothing tell me not of hopes but of facts i ask nothing of you
but what is in your power to comply with and what it is your duty to
comply with 

then sir i will comply with it but yet i hope from your goodness 

no expostulations no but's girl no qualifyings i will be obeyed i
tell you and cheerfully too or you are no child of mine 

i wept 

let me beseech you my dear and ever-honoured papa and i dropt down
on my knees that i may have only yours and my mamma's will and not my
brother's to obey 

i was going on but he was pleased to withdraw leaving me on the floor 
saying that he would not hear me thus by subtilty and cunning aiming to
distinguish away my duty repeating that he would be obeyed 

my heart is too full so full that it may endanger my duty were i
to try to unburden it to you on this occasion so i will lay down my
pen but can yet positively i will lay down my pen 




letter ix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe feb 26 in the morning 


my aunt who staid here last night made me a visit this morning as
soon as it was light she tells me that i was left alone with my
father yesterday on purpose that he might talk with me on my expected
obedience but that he owned he was put beside his purpose by reflecting
on something my brother had told him in my disfavour and by his
impatience but to suppose that such a gentle spirit as mine had
hitherto seemed to be should presume to dispute his will in a point
where the advantage of the whole family was to be so greatly promoted by
my compliance 

i find by a few words which dropt unawares from my aunt that they have
all an absolute dependence upon what they suppose to be meekness in my
temper but in this they may be mistaken for i verily think upon a
strict examination of myself that i have almost as much in me of my
father's as of my mother's family 

my uncle harlowe it seems is against driving me upon extremities but
my brother has engaged that the regard i have for my reputation and
my principles will bring me round to my duty that's the expression 
perhaps i shall have reason to wish i had not known this 

my aunt advises me to submit for the present to the interdicts they
have laid me under and indeed to encourage mr solmes's address i have
absolutely refused the latter let what will as i have told her be the
consequence the visiting prohibition i will conform to but as to that
of not corresponding with you nothing but the menace that our letters
shall be intercepted can engage my observation of it 

she believes that this order is from my father and that my mother
has not been consulted upon it she says that it is given as she has
reason think purely in consideration to me lest i should mortally
offend him and this from the incitements of other people meaning you
and miss lloyd i make no doubt rather than by my own will for still 
as she tells me he speaks kind and praiseful things of me 

here is clemency here is indulgence and so it is to prevent a
headstrong child as a good prince would wish to deter disaffected
subjects from running into rebellion and so forfeiting every thing 
but this is allowing to the young-man's wisdom of my brother a plotter
without a head and a brother without a heart 

how happy might i have been with any other brother in the world but
james harlowe and with any other sister but his sister wonder not my
dear that i who used to chide you for these sort of liberties with my
relations now am more undutiful than you ever was unkind i cannot bear
the thought of being deprived of the principal pleasure of my life for
such is your conversation by person and by letter and who besides can
bear to be made the dupe of such low cunning operating with such high
and arrogant passions 

but can you my dear miss howe condescend to carry on a private
correspondence with me if you can there is one way i have thought of 
by which it may be done 

you must remember the green lane as we call it that runs by the side
of the wood-house and poultry-yard where i keep my bantams pheasants 
and pea-hens which generally engage my notice twice a day the more
my favourites because they were my grandfather's and recommended to my
care by him and therefore brought hither from my dairy-house since his
death 

the lane is lower than the floor of the wood-house and in the side of
the wood-house the boards are rotted away down to the floor for half an
ell together in several places hannah can step into the lane and make
a mark with chalk where a letter or parcel may be pushed in under some
sticks which may be so managed as to be an unsuspected cover for the
written deposits from either 


 


i have been just now to look at the place and find it will answer so
your faithful robert may without coming near the house and as only
passing through the green lame which leads to two or three farm-houses
 out of livery if you please  very easily take from thence my letters
and deposit yours 

this place is the more convenient because it is seldom resorted to
but by myself or hannah on the above-mentioned account for it is the
general store-house for firing the wood for constant use being nearer
the house 

one corner of this being separated off for the roosting-place of my
little poultry either she or i shall never want a pretence to go
thither 

try my dear the success of a letter this way and give me your opinion
and advice what to do in this disgraceful situation as i cannot but
call it and what you think of my prospects and what you would do in my
case 

but before-hand i will tell you that your advice must not run in favour
of this solmes and yet it is very likely they will endeavour to engage
your mother in order to induce you who have such an influence over me 
to favour him 

yet on second thoughts if you incline to that side of the question 
i would have you write your whole mind determined as i think i am and
cannot help it i would at least give a patient hearing to what may be
said on the other side for my regards are not so much engaged  upon my
word they are not i know not myself if they be  to another person as
some of my friends suppose and as you giving way to your lively vein 
upon his last visits affected to suppose what preferable favour i
may have for him to any other person is owing more to the usage he has
received and for my sake borne than to any personal consideration 

i write a few lines of grateful acknowledgement to your good mother for
her favours to me in the late happy period i fear i shall never know
such another i hope she will forgive me that i did not write sooner 

the bearer if suspected and examined is to produce that as the only
one he carries 

how do needless watchfulness and undue restraint produce artifice and
contrivance i should abhor these clandestine correspondences were they
not forced upon me they have so mean so low an appearance to myself 
that i think i ought not to expect that you should take part in them 

but why as i have also expostulated with my aunt must i be pushed
into a state which i have no wish to enter into although i reverence
it why should not my brother so many years older and so earnest to
see me engaged be first engaged and why should not my sister be first
provided for 

but here i conclude these unavailing expostulations with the assurance 
that i am and ever will be 

your affectionate clarissa harlowe 




letter x

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe feb 27


what odd heads some people have miss clarissa harlowe to be sacrificed
in marriage to mr roger solmes astonishing 

i must not you say give my advice in favour of this man you now
convince me my dear that you are nearer of kin than i thought you 
to the family that could think of so preposterous a match or you would
never have had the least notion of my advising in his favour 

ask for his picture you know i have a good hand at drawing an ugly
likeness but i'll see a little further first for who knows what may
happen since matters are in such a train and since you have not the
courage to oppose so overwhelming a torrent 

you ask me to help you to a little of my spirit are you in earnest 
but it will not now i doubt do you service it will not sit naturally
upon you you are your mother's girl think what you will and have
violent spirits to contend with alas my dear you should have borrowed
some of mine a little sooner that is to say before you had given the
management of your estate into the hands of those who think they have a
prior claim to it what though a father's has not the father two elder
children and do they not both bear more of his stamp and image than
you do pray my dear call me not to account for this free question 
lest your application of my meaning on examination prove to be as
severe as that 

now i have launched out a little indulge me one word more in the same
strain i will be decent i promise you i think you might have know 
that avarice and envy are two passions that are not to be satisfied the
one by giving the other by the envied person's continuing to deserve
and excel fuel fuel both all the world over to flames insatiate and
devouring 

but since you ask for my opinion you must tell me all you know or
surmise of their inducements and if you will not forbid me to make
extracts from your letters for the entertainment of my aunt and cousin
in the little island who long to hear more of your affairs it will be
very obliging 

but you are so tender of some people who have no tenderness for any body
but themselves that i must conjure you to speak out remember that
a friendship like ours admits of no reserves you may trust my
impartiality it would be an affront to your own judgment if you did
not for do you not ask my advice and have you not taught me that
friendship should never give a bias against justice justify them 
therefore if you can let us see if there be any sense whether
sufficient reason or not in their choice at present i cannot and yet
i know a good deal of your family have any conception how all of them 
your mother and your aunt hervey in particular can join with the rest
against judgments given as to some of the others i cannot wonder at
any thing they do or attempt to do where self is concerned 

you ask why may not your brother be first engaged in wedlock i'll tell
you why his temper and his arrogance are too well known to induce women
he would aspire to to receive his addresses notwithstanding his great
independent acquisitions and still greater prospects let me tell you 
my dear those acquisitions have given him more pride than reputation 
to me he is the most intolerable creature that i ever conversed with 
the treatment you blame he merited from one whom he addressed with the
air of a person who presumes that he is about to confer a favour rather
than to receive one i ever loved to mortify proud and insolent spirits 
what think you makes me bear hickman near me but that the man is
humble and knows and keeps his distance 

as to your question why your elder sister may not be first provided
for i answer because she must have no man but one who has a great and
clear estate that's one thing another is because she has a younger
sister pray my dear be so good as to tell me what man of a great and
clear estate would think of that eldest sister while the younger were
single 

you are all too rich to be happy child for must not each of you by
the constitutions of your family marry to be still richer people who
know in what their main excellence consists are not to be blamed are
they for cultivating and improving what they think most valuable is
true happiness any part of your family view so far from it that none
of your family but yourself could be happy were they not rich so let
them fret on grumble and grudge and accumulate and wondering what
ails them that they have not happiness when they have riches think the
cause is want of more and so go on heaping up till death as greedy an
accumulator as themselves gathers them into his garner 

well then once more i say do you my dear tell me what you know of
their avowed and general motives and i will tell you more than you will
tell me of their failings your aunt hervey you say has told you why
must i ask you to let me know them when you condescend to ask my advice
on the occasion 


 see letter viii 


that they prohibit your corresponding with me is a wisdom i neither
wonder at nor blame them for since it is an evidence to me that they
know their own folly and if they do is it strange that they should be
afraid to trust one another's judgment upon it 

i am glad you have found out a way to correspond with me i approve
it much i shall more if this first trial of it prove successful but
should it not and should it fall into their hands it would not concern
me but for your sake 

we have heard before you wrote that all was not right between your
relations and you at your coming home that mr solmes visited you and
that with a prospect of success but i concluded the mistake lay in the
person and that his address was to miss arabella and indeed had she
been as good-natured as your plump ones generally are i should have
thought her too good for him by half this must certainly be the thing 
thought i and my beloved friend is sent for to advise and assist in her
nuptial preparations who knows said i to my mother but that when
the man has thrown aside his yellow full-buckled peruke and his
broad-brimmed beaver both of which i suppose were sir oliver's best
of long standing he may cut a tolerable figure dangling to church
with miss bell the woman as she observes should excel the man in
features and where can she match so well for a foil 

i indulged this surmise against rumour because i could not believe that
the absurdest people in england could be so very absurd as to think of
this man for you 

we heard moreover that you received no visiters i could assign no
reason for this except that the preparations for your sister were to be
private and the ceremony sudden for fear this man should as another
man did change his mind miss lloyd and miss biddulph were with me to
inquire what i knew of this and of your not being in church either
morning or afternoon the sunday after your return from us to the
disappointment of a little hundred of your admirers to use their words 
it was easy for me to guess the reason to be what you confirm their
apprehensions that lovelace would be there and attempt to wait on you
home 

my mother takes very kindly your compliments in your letter to her her
words upon reading it were miss clarissa harlowe is an admirable young
lady wherever she goes she confers a favour whomever she leaves she
fills with regret  and then a little comparative reflection o my
nancy that you had a little of her sweet obligingness 

no matter the praise was yours you are me and i enjoyed it the more
enjoyed it because shall i tell you the truth because i think myself
as well as i am were it but for this reason that had i twenty brother
james's and twenty sister bell's not one of them nor all of them
joined together would dare to treat me as yours presume to treat you 
the person who will bear much shall have much to bear all the world
through it is your own sentiment grounded upon the strongest instance
that can be given in your own family though you have so little improved
by it 


 letter v 


the result is this that i am fitter for this world than you you for
the next than me that is the difference but long long for my sake 
and for hundreds of sakes may it be before you quit us for company more
congenial to you and more worthy of you 

i communicated to my mother the account you give of your strange
reception also what a horrid wretch they have found out for you and
the compulsory treatment they give you it only set her on magnifying
her lenity to me on my tyrannical behaviour as she will call it
 mothers must have their way you know my dear  to the man whom she so
warmly recommends against whom it seems there can be no just exception 
and expatiating upon the complaisance i owe her for her indulgence so i
believe i must communicate to her nothing farther especially as i know
she would condemn the correspondence between us and that between you
and lovelace as clandestine and undutiful proceedings and divulge our
secret besides for duty implicit is her cry and moreover she lends
a pretty open ear to the preachments of that starch old bachelor your
uncle antony and for an example to her daughter would be more careful
how she takes your part be the cause ever so just 

yet is this not the right policy neither for people who allow nothing
will be granted nothing in other words those who aim at carrying too
many points will not be able to carry any 

but can you divine my dear what the old preachment-making 
plump-hearted soul your uncle antony means by his frequent amblings
hither there is such smirking and smiling between my mother and him 
such mutual praises of economy and that is my way  and this i
do  and i am glad it has your approbation sir  and you look into
every thing madam  nothing would be done if i did not  

such exclamations against servants such exaltings of self and
dear heart and good lack and las a-day and now-and-then their
conversation sinking into a whispering accent if i come across
them i'll tell you my dear i don't above half like it 

only that these old bachelors usually take as many years to resolve upon
matrimony as they can reasonably expect to live or i should be ready
to fire upon his visits and to recommend mr hickman to my mother's
acceptance as a much more eligible man for what he wants in years 
he makes up in gravity and if you will not chide me i will say that
there is a primness in both especially when the man has presumed too
much with me upon my mother's favour for him and is under discipline on
that account as make them seem near of kin and then in contemplation
of my sauciness and what they both fear from it they sigh away and
seem so mightily to compassionate each other that if pity be but one
remove from love i am in no danger while they are both in a great
deal and don't know it 

now my dear i know you will be upon me with your grave airs so in for
the lamb as the saying is in for the sheep and do you yourself look
about you for i'll have a pull with you by way of being aforehand 
hannibal we read always advised to attack the romans upon their own
territories 

you are pleased to say and upon your word too that your regards a
mighty quaint word for affections are not so much engaged as some
of your friends suppose to another person what need you give one to
imagine my dear that the last month or two has been a period extremely
favourable to that other person whom it has made an obliger of the
niece for his patience with the uncles 

but to pass that by so much engaged how much my dear shall i
infer some of your friends suppose a great deal you seem to own a
little 

don't be angry it is all fair because you have not acknowledged to
me that little people i have heard you say who affect secrets always
excite curiosity 

but you proceed with a kind of drawback upon your averment as if
recollection had given you a doubt you know not yourself if they be
 so much engaged  was it necessary to say this to me and to say
it upon your word too but you know best yet you don't neither 
i believe for a beginning love is acted by a subtle spirit and
oftentimes discovers itself to a by-stander when the person possessed
 why should i not call it possessed knows not it has such a demon 

but further you say what preferable favour you may have for him to any
other person is owing more to the usage he has received and for your
sake borne than to any personal consideration 

this is generously said it is in character but o my friend depend
upon it you are in danger depend upon it whether you know it or not 
you are a little in for't your native generosity and greatness of mind
endanger you all your friends by fighting against him with
impolitic violence fight for him and lovelace my life for yours 
notwithstanding all his veneration and assiduities has seen further
than that veneration and those assiduities so well calculated to your
meridian will let him own he has seen has seen in short that his
work is doing for him more effectually than he could do it for himself 
and have you not before now said that nothing is so penetrating as the
eye of a lover who has vanity and who says lovelace wants vanity 

in short my dear it is my opinion and that from the easiness of his
heart and behaviour that he has seen more than i have seen more than
you think could be seen more than i believe you yourself know or else
you would let me know it 

already in order to restrain him from resenting the indignities he has
received and which are daily offered him he has prevailed upon you to
correspond with him privately i know he has nothing to boast of from
what you have written but is not his inducing you to receive his
letters and to answer them a great point gained by your insisting
that he should keep the correspondence private it appears there is one
secret which you do not wish the world should know and he is master of
that secret he is indeed himself as i may say that secret what an
intimacy does this beget for the lover how is it distancing the parent 

yet who as things are situated can blame you your condescension has
no doubt hitherto prevented great mischiefs it must be continued 
for the same reasons while the cause remains you are drawn in by
a perverse fate against inclination but custom with such
laudable purposes will reconcile the inconveniency and make an
inclination and i would advise you as you would wish to manage on an
occasion so critical with that prudence which governs all your actions 
not to be afraid of entering upon a close examination into the true
springs and grounds of this your generosity to that happy man 

it is my humble opinion i tell you frankly that on inquiry it will
come out to be love don't start my dear has not your man himself had
natural philosophy enough to observe already to your aunt hervey that
love takes the deepest root in the steadiest minds the deuce take his
sly penetration i was going to say for this was six or seven weeks
ago 

i have been tinctured you know nor on the coolest reflection could
i account how and when the jaundice began but had been over head and
ears as the saying is but for some of that advice from you which i
now return you yet my man was not half so so what my dear to be sure
lovelace is a charming fellow and were he only but i will not make
you glow as you read upon my word i will not yet my dear don't you
find at your heart somewhat unusual make it go throb throb throb as
you read just here if you do don't be ashamed to own it it is your
generosity my love that's all but as the roman augur said caesar 
beware of the ides of march 

adieu my dearest friend forgive and very speedily by the new found
expedient tell me that you forgive 

your ever-affectionate anna howe 




letter xi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wednesday march 1 


you both nettled and alarmed me my dearest miss howe by the concluding
part of your last at first reading it i did not think it necessary 
said i to myself to guard against a critic when i was writing to so
dear a friend but then recollecting myself is there not more in it 
said i than the result of a vein so naturally lively surely i must
have been guilty of an inadvertence let me enter into the close
examination of myself which my beloved friend advises 

i do so and cannot own any of the glow any of the throbs you
mention upon my word i will repeat i cannot and yet the passages in
my letter upon which you are so humourously severe lay me fairly open
to your agreeable raillery i own they do and i cannot tell what turn
my mind had taken to dictate so oddly to my pen 

but pray now is it saying so much when one who has no very
particular regard to any man says there are some who are preferable to
others and is it blamable to say they are the preferable who are not
well used by one's relations yet dispense with that usage out of regard
to one's self which they would otherwise resent mr lovelace for
instance i may be allowed to say is a man to be preferred to mr 
solmes and that i do prefer him to that man but surely this may be
said without its being a necessary consequence that i must be in love
with him 

indeed i would not be in love with him as it is called for the world 
first because i have no opinion of his morals and think it a fault in
which our whole family my brother excepted has had a share that he
was permitted to visit us with a hope which however being distant 
did not as i have observed heretofore entitle any of us to call
him to account for such of his immoralities as came to our ears next 
because i think him to be a vain man capable of triumphing secretly at
least over a person whose heart he thinks he has engaged and thirdly 
because the assiduities and veneration which you impute to him seem to
carry an haughtiness in them as if he thought his address had a merit
in it that would be more than an equivalent to a woman's love in
short his very politeness notwithstanding the advantages he must have
had from his birth and education appear to be constrained and with
the most remarkable easy and genteel person something at times 
seems to be behind in his manner that is too studiously kept in then 
good-humoured as he is thought to be in the main to other people's
servants and this even to familiarity although as you have observed 
a familiarity that has dignity in it not unbecoming to a man of quality 
he is apt sometimes to break out into a passion with his own an oath
or a curse follows and such looks from those servants as plainly shew
terror and that they should have fared worse had they not been in my
hearing with a confirmation in the master's looks of a surmise too well
justified 


 letter iii 


indeed my dear this man is not the man i have great objections to
him my heart throbs not after him i glow not but with indignation
against myself for having given room for such an imputation but you
must not my dearest friend construe common gratitude into love i
cannot bear that you should but if ever i should have the misfortune to
think it love i promise you upon my word which is the same as upon my
honour that i will acquaint you with it 

you bid me to tell you very speedily and by the new-found expedient 
that i am not displeased with you for your agreeable raillery i
dispatch this therefore immediately postponing to my next the account
of the inducements which my friends have to promote with so much
earnestness the address of mr solmes 

be satisfied my dear mean time that i am not displeased with you 
indeed i am not on the contrary i give you my hearty thanks for your
friendly premonitions and i charge you as i have often done that if
you observe any thing in me so very faulty as would require from you
to others in my behalf the palliation of friendly and partial love you
acquaint me with it for methinks i would so conduct myself as not to
give reason even for an adversary to censure me and how shall so weak
and so young a creature avoid the censure of such if my friend will not
hold a looking-glass before me to let me see my imperfections 

judge me then my dear as any indifferent person knowing what you
know of me would do i may be at first be a little pained may glow a
little perhaps to be found less worthy of your friendship than i wish
to be but assure yourself that your kind correction will give me
reflection that shall amend me if it do not you will have a fault to
accuse me of that will be utterly inexcusable a fault let me add 
that should you not accuse me of it if in your opinion i am guilty you
will not be so much so warmly my friend as i am yours since i have
never spared you on the like occasions 

here i break off to begin another letter to you with the assurance 
mean time that i am and ever will be 

your equally affectionate and grateful cl harlowe 




letter xii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe thursday morning march 2 


indeed you would not be in love with him for the world your servant 
my dear nor would i have you for i think with all the advantages of
person fortune and family he is not by any means worthy of you and
this opinion i give as well from the reasons you mention which i cannot
but confirm as from what i have heard of him but a few hours ago
from mrs fortescue a favourite of lady betty lawrance who knows him
well but let me congratulate you however on your being the first of
our sex that ever i heard of who has been able to turn that lion love 
at her own pleasure into a lap-dog 

well but if you have not the throbs and the glows you have not and
are not in love good reason why because you would not be in love and
there's no more to be said only my dear i shall keep a good look-out
upon you and so i hope you will be upon yourself for it is no manner
of argument that because you would not be in love you therefore are
not but before i part entirely with this subject a word in your ear 
my charming friend tis only by way of caution and in pursuance of the
general observation that a stander-by is often a better judge of the
game than those that play may it not be that you have had and
have such cross creatures and such odd heads to deal with as have not
allowed you to attend to the throbs or if you had them a little now
and then whether having had two accounts to place them to you have
not by mistake put them to the wrong one 

but whether you have a value for lovelace or not i know you will be
impatient to hear what mrs fortescue has said of him nor will i keep
you longer in suspense 

an hundred wild stories she tells of him from childhood to manhood 
for as she observed having never been subject to contradiction he
was always as mischievous as a monkey but i shall pass over these whole
hundred of his puerile rogueries although indicative ones as i may
say to take notice as well of some things you are not quite ignorant
of as of others you know not and to make a few observations upon him
and his ways 

mrs fortescue owns what every body knows that he is notoriously 
nay avowedly a man of pleasure yet says that in any thing he sets
his heart upon or undertakes he is the most industrious and persevering
mortal under the sun he rests it seems not above six hours in the
twenty-four any more than you he delights in writing whether at lord
m s or at lady betty's or lady sarah's he has always a pen in his
fingers when he retires one of his companions confirming his love of
writing has told her that his thoughts flow rapidly to his pen  and
you and i my dear have observed on more occasions than one that
though he writes even a fine hand he is one of the readiest and
quickest of writers he must indeed have had early a very docile genius 
since a person of his pleasurable turn and active spirit could
never have submitted to take long or great pains in attaining the
qualifications he is master of qualifications so seldom attained by
youth of quality and fortune by such especially of those of either 
who like him have never known what it was to be controuled 

he had once it seems the vanity upon being complimented on these
talents and on his surprising diligence for a man of pleasure to
compare himself to julius caesar who performed great actions by day 
and wrote them down at night and valued himself that he only wanted
caesar's out-setting to make a figure among his contemporaries 

he spoke of this indeed she says with an air of pleasantry for
she observed and so have we that he has the art of acknowledging his
vanity with so much humour that it sets him above the contempt which
is due to vanity and self-opinion and at the same time half persuades
those who hear him that he really deserves the exultation he gives
himself 

but supposing it to be true that all his vacant nightly hours are
employed in writing what can be his subjects if like caesar his own
actions he must undoubtedly be a very enterprising and very wicked man 
since nobody suspects him to have a serious turn and decent as he is
in his conversation with us his writings are not probably such as would
redound either to his own honour or to the benefit of others were they
to be read he must be conscious of this since mrs fortescue says 
that in the great correspondence by letters which he holds he is
as secret and as careful as if it were of a treasonable nature yet
troubles not his head with politics though nobody knows the interests
of princes and courts better than he is said to do 

that you and i my dear should love to write is no wonder we have
always from the time each could hold a pen delighted in epistolary
correspondencies our employments are domestic and sedentary and we can
scribble upon twenty innocent subjects and take delight in them because
they are innocent though were they to be seen they might not much
profit or please others but that such a gay lively young fellow as
this who rides hunts travels frequents the public entertainments 
and has means to pursue his pleasures should be able to set himself
down to write for hours together as you and i have heard him say he
frequently does that is the strange thing 

mrs fortescue says that he is a complete master of short-hand
writing  by the way what inducements could a swift writer as he have
to learn short-hand 

she says and we know it as well as she that he has a surprising
memory and a very lively imagination 

whatever his other vices are all the world as well as mrs fortescue 
says he is a sober man and among all his bad qualities gaming that
great waster of time as well as fortune is not his vice  so that he
must have his head as cool and his reason as clear as the prime of
youth and his natural gaiety will permit and by his early morning
hours a great portion of time upon his hands to employ in writing or
worse 

mrs fortescue says he has one gentleman who is more his intimate and
correspondent than any of the rest  you remember what his dismissed
bailiff said of him and of his associates i don't find but that mrs 
fortescue confirms this part of it that all his relations are afraid
of him and that his pride sets him above owing obligations to them 
she believes he is clear of the world and that he will continue so 
no doubt from the same motive that makes him avoid being obliged to his
relations 


 letter iv 


a person willing to think favourably of him would hope that a brave a
learned and a diligent man cannot be naturally a bad man but if he
be better than his enemies say he is and if worse he is bad indeed he
is guilty of an inexcusable fault in being so careless as he is of his
reputation i think a man can be so but from one of these two reasons 
either that he is conscious he deserves the ill spoken of him or that
he takes a pride in being thought worse than he is both very bad and
threatening indications since the first must shew him to be utterly
abandoned and it is but natural to conclude from the other that what
a man is not ashamed to have imputed to him he will not scruple to be
guilty of whenever he has an opportunity 

upon the whole and upon all i could gather from mrs fortescue mr 
lovelace is a very faulty man you and i have thought him too gay too
inconsiderate too rash too little an hypocrite to be deep you see
he never would disguise his natural temper haughty as it certainly
is with respect to your brother's behaviour to him where he thinks
a contempt due he pays it to the uttermost nor has he complaisance
enough to spare your uncles 

but were he deep and ever so deep you would soon penetrate him if
they would leave you to yourself his vanity would be your clue never
man had more yet as mrs fortescue observed never did man carry
it off so happily  there is a strange mixture in it of humourous
vivacity since but for one half of what he says of himself when he is
in the vein any other man would be insufferable 


 


talk of the devil is an old saying the lively wretch has made me a
visit and is but just gone away he is all impatience and resentment
at the treatment you meet with and full of apprehensions too that they
will carry their point with you 

i told him my opinion that you will never be brought to think of such a
man as solmes but that it will probably end in a composition never to
have either 

no man he said whose fortunes and alliances are so considerable ever
had so little favour from a woman for whose sake he had borne so much 

i told him my mind as freely as i used to do but whoever was in fault 
self being judge he complained of spies set upon his conduct and to
pry into his life and morals and this by your brother and uncles 

i told him that this was very hard upon him and the more so as
neither his life nor morals perhaps would stand a fair inquiry 

he smiled and called himself my servant the occasion was too fair 
he said for miss howe who never spared him to let it pass but lord
help the shallow souls of the harlowes would i believe it they were
for turning plotters upon him they had best take care he did not pay
them in their own coin their hearts were better turned for such works
than their heads 

i asked him if he valued himself upon having a head better turned than
theirs for such works as he called them 

he drew off and then ran into the highest professions of reverence and
affection for you 

the object so meritorious who can doubt the reality of his professions 

adieu my dearest my noble friend i love and admire you for the
generous conclusion of your last more than i can express though i began
this letter with impertinent raillery knowing that you always loved to
indulge my mad vein yet never was there a heart that more glowed with
friendly love than that of

your own anna howe 




letter xiii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wednesday march 1 


i now take up my pen to lay before you the inducements and motive which
my friends have to espouse so earnestly the address of this mr solmes 

in order to set this matter in a clear light it is necessary to go a
little back and even perhaps to mention some things which you already
know and so you may look upon what i am going to relate as a kind of
supplement to my letters of the 15th and 20th of january last 


 letters iv and v 


in those letters of which i have kept memorandums i gave you an
account of my brother's and sister's antipathy to mr lovelace and the
methods they took so far as they had then come to my knowledge to ruin
him in the opinion of my other friends and i told you that after a
very cold yet not a directly affrontive behaviour to him they all of
a sudden became more violent and proceeded to personal insults which
brought on at last the unhappy rencounter between my brother and him 


 see letter iv 


now you must know that from the last conversation that passed between
my aunt and me it comes out that this sudden vehemence on my
brother's and sister's parts was owing to stronger reasons than to the
college-begun antipathy on his side or to slighted love on hers 
to wit to an apprehension that my uncles intended to follow my
grandfather's example in my favour at least in a higher degree
than they wish they should an apprehension founded it seems on a
conversation between my two uncles and my brother and sister which my
aunt communicated to me in confidence as an argument to prevail upon
me to accept of mr solmes's noble settlements urging that such a
seasonable compliance would frustrate my brother's and sister's views 
and establish me for ever in the love of my father and uncles 

i will give you the substance of this communicated conversation after
i have made a brief introductory observation or two which however i
hardly need to make to you who are so well acquainted with us all did
not the series or thread of the story require it 

i have more than once mentioned to you the darling view some of us have
long had of raising a family as it is called a reflection as i have
often thought upon our own which is no considerable or upstart one on
either side on my mother's especially a view too frequently it
seems entertained by families which having great substance cannot be
satisfied without rank and title 

my uncles had once extended this view to each of us three children 
urging that as they themselves intended not to marry we each of
us might be so portioned and so advantageously matched as that
our posterity if not ourselves might make a first figure in our
country while my brother as the only son thought the two girls might
be very well provided for by ten or fifteen thousand pounds a-piece 
and that all the real estates in the family to wit my grandfather's 
father's and two uncles' and the remainder of their respective
personal estates together with what he had an expectation of from
his godmother would make such a noble fortune and give him such an
interest as might entitle him to hope for a peerage nothing less would
satisfy his ambition 

with this view he gave himself airs very early that his grandfather
and uncles were his stewards that no man ever had better that
daughters were but incumbrances and drawbacks upon a family  and this
low and familiar expression was often in his mouth and uttered always
with the self-complaisance which an imagined happy thought can be
supposed to give the speaker to wit that a man who has sons brings up
chickens for his own table   though once i made his comparison stagger
with him by asking him if the sons to make it hold were to have
their necks wrung off   whereas daughters are chickens brought up
for tables of other men  this accompanied with the equally polite
reflection that to induce people to take them off their hands the
family-stock must be impaired into the bargain  used to put my sister
out of all patience and although she now seems to think a younger
sister only can be an incumbrance she was then often proposing to me to
make a party in our own favour against my brother's rapacious views as
she used to call them while i was for considering the liberties he took
of this sort as the effect of a temporary pleasantry which in a young
man not naturally good-humoured i was glad to see or as a foible that
deserved raillery but no other notice 

but when my grandfather's will of the purport of which in my particular
favour until it was opened i was as ignorant as they had lopped off
one branch of my brother's expectation he was extremely dissatisfied
with me nobody indeed was pleased for although every one loved me yet
being the youngest child father uncles brother sister all thought
themselves postponed as to matter of right and power  who loves not
power   and my father himself could not bear that i should be made
sole as i may call it and independent for such the will as to that
estate and the powers it gave unaccountably as they all said made
me 

to obviate therefore every one's jealousy i gave up to my father's
management as you know not only the estate but the money bequeathed
me which was a moiety of what my grandfather had by him at his death 
the other moiety being bequeathed to my sister contenting myself
to take as from his bounty what he was pleased to allow me without
desiring the least addition to my annual stipend and then i hoped i had
laid all envy asleep but still my brother and sister jealous as now
is evident of my two uncles' favour of me and of the pleasure i had
given my father and them by this act of duty were every now-and-then
occasionally doing me covert ill offices of which however i took the
less notice when i was told of them as i thought i had removed the
cause of their envy and i imputed every thing of that sort to the
petulance they are both pretty much noted for 

my brother's acquisition then took place this made us all very happy 
and he went down to take possession of it and his absence on so good
an account too made us still happier then followed lord m s proposal
for my sister and this was an additional felicity for the time i have
told you how exceedingly good-humoured it made my sister 

you know how that went off you know what came on in its place 

my brother then returned and we were all wrong again and bella as
i observed in my letters abovementioned had an opportunity to give
herself the credit of having refused mr lovelace on the score of his
reputed faulty morals this united my brother and sister in one cause 
they set themselves on all occasions to depreciate mr lovelace and his
family too a family which deserves nothing but respect and this gave
rise to the conversation i am leading to between my uncles and them of
which i now come to give the particulars after i have observed that it
happened before the rencounter and soon after the inquiry made into mr 
lovelace's affairs had come out better than my brother and sister hoped
it would 


 see letter iv 


they were bitterly inveighing against him in their usual way 
strengthening their invectives with some new stories in his disfavour 
when my uncle antony having given them a patient hearing declared 
that he thought the gentleman behaved like a gentleman his niece clary
with prudence and that a more honourable alliance for the family as he
had often told them could not be wished for since mr lovelace had a
very good paternal estate and that by the evidence of an enemy 
all clear nor did it appear that he was so bad a man as he had been
represented to be wild indeed but it was a gay time of life he was a
man of sense and he was sure that his niece would not have him if
she had not good reason to think him reformed or that there was a
likelihood that she could reform him by her example 

my uncle then gave one instance my aunt told me as a proof of a
generosity in mr lovelace's spirit which convinced him that he was not
a bad man in nature and that he was of a temper he was pleased to say 
like my own which was that when he my uncle had represented to him 
that he might if he pleased make three or four hundred pounds a year
of his paternal estate more than he did he answered that his tenants
paid their rents well that it was a maxim with his family from which
he would by no means depart never to rack-rent old tenants or their
descendants and that it was a pleasure to him to see all his tenants
look fat sleek and contented 

i indeed had once occasionally heard him say something like this and
thought he never looked so well as at that time except once and that
was in an instance given by him on the following incident 

an unhappy tenant of my uncle antony came petitioning to my uncle
for forbearance in mr lovelace's presence when he had fruitlessly
withdrawn mr lovelace pleaded his cause so well that the man was
called in again and had his suit granted and mr lovelace privately
followed him out and gave him two guineas for present relief the
man having declared that at the time he had not five shilling in the
world 

on this occasion he told my uncle but without any airs of
ostentation that he had once observed an old tenant and his wife in a
very mean habit at church and questioning them about it the next day 
as he knew they had no hard bargain in their farm the man said he had
done some very foolish things with a good intention which had put him
behind-hand and he could not have paid his rent and appear better 
he asked him how long it would take him to retrieve the foolish step
he acknowledged he had made he said perhaps two or three years well
then said he i will abate you five pounds a year for seven years 
provided you will lay it upon your wife and self that you may make a
sunday-appearance like my tenants mean time take this putting his
hand in his pocket and giving him five guineas to put yourselves in
present plight and let me see you next sunday at church hand in hand 
like an honest and loving couple and i bespeak you to dine with me
afterwards 

although this pleased me when i heard it as giving an instance of
generosity and prudence at the same time not lessening as my uncle
took notice the yearly value of the farm yet my dear i had no
throbs no glows upon it upon my word i had not nevertheless i own
to you that i could not help saying to myself on the occasion were it
ever to be my lot to have this man he would not hinder me from pursuing
the methods i so much delight to take' with a pity that such a man
were not uniformly good 

forgive me this digression 

my uncle went on as my aunt told me that besides his paternal
estate he was the immediate heir to very splendid fortunes that when
he was in treaty for his niece arabella lord m told him my uncle 
what great things he and his two half-sisters intended to do for him 
in order to qualify him for the title which would be extinct at his
lordship's death and which they hoped to procure for him or a still
higher that of those ladies' father which had been for some time
extinct on failure of heirs male that it was with this view that his
relations were all so earnest for his marrying that as he saw not
where mr lovelace could better himself so truly he thought there was
wealth enough in their own family to build up three considerable ones 
that therefore he must needs say he was the more desirous of this
alliance as there was a great probability not only from mr lovelace's
descent but from his fortunes that his niece clarissa might one day
be a peeress of great britain and upon that prospect  here was the
mortifying stroke  he should for his own part think it not wrong to
make such dispositions as should contribute to the better support of the
dignity 

my uncle harlowe it seems far from disapproving of what his brother
had said declared that there was but one objection to an alliance
with mr lovelace to wit his faulty morals especially as so much
could be done for miss bella and for my brother too by my father and
as my brother was actually possessed of a considerable estate by virtue
of the deed of gift and will of his godmother lovell 

had i known this before i should the less have wondered at many things
i have been unable to account for in my brother's and sister's behaviour
to me and been more on my guard than i imagined there was a necessity
to be 

you may easily guess how much this conversation affected my brother at
the time he could not you know but be very uneasy to hear two of his
stewards talk at this rate to his face 

he had from early days by his violent temper made himself both feared
and courted by the whole family my father himself as i have lately
mentioned very often long before my brother's acquisition had made him
still more assuming gave way to him as to an only son who was to build
up the name and augment the honour of it little inducement therefore 
had my brother to correct a temper which gave him so much consideration
with every body 

see sister bella  said he in an indecent passion before my uncles 
on this occasion i have mentioned see how it is you and i ought to
look about us this little syren is in a fair way to out-uncle as she
has already out-grandfather'd us both 

from this time as i now find it plain upon recollection did my brother
and sister behave to me as to one who stood in their way and to each
other as having but one interest and were resolved therefore to bend
all their force to hinder an alliance from taking effect which they
believed was likely to oblige them to contract their views 

and how was this to be done after such a declaration from both my
uncles 

my brother found out the way my sister as i have said went hand in
hand with him between them the family union was broke and every one
was made uneasy mr lovelace was received more and more coldly by all 
but not being to be put out of his course by slights only personal
affronts succeeded defiances next then the rencounter that as you
have heard did the business and now if i do not oblige them my
grandfather's estate is to be litigated with me and i who never
designed to take advantage of the independency bequeathed me am to be
as dependent upon my father's will as a daughter ought to be who knows
not what is good for herself this is the language of the family now 

but if i will suffer myself to be prevailed upon how happy as they lay
it out shall we all be such presents am i to have such jewels and
i cannot tell what from every one in the family then mr solmes's
fortunes are so great and his proposals so very advantageous no
relation whom he values that there will be abundant room to raise
mine upon them were the high-intended favours of my own relations to
be quite out of the question moreover it is now with this view 
found out that i have qualifications which of themselves will be a full
equivalent to mr solmes for the settlements he is to make and still
leave him under an obligation to me for my compliance he himself thinks
so i am told so very poor a creature is he even in his own eyes as
well as in theirs 

these desirable views answered how rich how splendid shall we all
three be and i what obligations shall i lay upon them all and that
only by doing an act of duty so suitable to my character and manner of
thinking if indeed i am the generous as well as dutiful creature i
have hitherto made them believe i am 

this is the bright side that is turned to my father and uncles to
captivate them but i am afraid that my brother's and sister's design is
to ruin me with them at any rate were it otherwise would they not on
my return from you have rather sought to court than frighten me into
measures which their hearts are so much bent to carry a method they
have followed ever since 

mean time orders are given to all the servants to shew the highest
respect to mr solmes the generous mr solmes is now his character with
some of our family but are not these orders a tacit confession 
that they think his own merit will not procure him respect he is
accordingly in every visit he makes not only highly caressed by the
principals of our family but obsequiously attended and cringed to by
the menials and the noble settlements are echoed from every mouth 

noble is the word used to enforce the offers of a man who is mean enough
avowedly to hate and wicked enough to propose to rob of their just
expectations his own family every one of which at the same time
stands in too much need of his favour in order to settle all he is
worth upon me and if i die without children and he has none by any
other marriage upon a family which already abounds such are his
proposals 

but were there no other motive to induce me to despise the upstart man 
is not this unjust one to his family enough the upstart man i repeat 
for he was not born to the immense riches he is possessed of riches
left by one niggard to another in injury to the next heir because that
other is a niggard and should i not be as culpable do you think in my
acceptance of such unjust settlements as he is in the offer of them if
i could persuade myself to be a sharer in them or suffer a reversionary
expectation of possessing them to influence my choice 

indeed it concerns me not a little that my friends could be brought to
encourage such offers on such motives as i think a person of conscience
should not presume to begin the world with 

but this it seems is the only method that can be taken to disappoint mr 
lovelace and at the same time to answer all my relations have wish for
each of us and surely i will not stand against such an accession to the
family as may happen from marrying mr solmes since now a possibility
is discovered which such a grasping mind as my brother's can easily
turn into a probability that my grandfather's estate will revert to
it with a much more considerable one of the man's own instances of
estates falling in in cases far more unlikely than this are insisted
upon and my sister says in the words of an old saw it is good to be
related to an estate 

while solmes smiling no doubt to himself at a hope so remote by offers
only obtains all their interests and doubts not to join to his own
the estate i am envied for which for the conveniency of its situation
between two of his will it seems be of twice the value to him that
it would be of to any other person and is therefore i doubt not a
stronger motive with him than the wife 

these my dear seem to me the principal inducements of my relations to
espouse so vehemently as they do this man's suit and here once more 
must i deplore the family fault which gives those inducements such a
force as it will be difficult to resist 

and thus far let matters with regard to mr solmes and me come out as
they will my brother has succeeded in his views that is to say he
has in the first place got my father to make the cause his own and to
insist upon my compliance as an act of duty 

my mother has never thought fit to oppose my father's will when once he
has declared himself determined 

my uncles stiff unbroken highly-prosperous bachelors give me leave
to say though very worthy persons in the main have as high notions
of a child's duty as of a wife's obedience in the last of which my
mother's meekness has confirmed them and given them greater reason to
expect the first 

my aunt hervey not extremely happy in her own nuptials and perhaps
under some little obligation is got over and chuses  sic  not to
open her lips in my favour against the wills of a father and uncles so
determined 

this passiveness in my mother and in my aunt in a point so contrary
to their own first judgments is too strong a proof that my father is
absolutely resolved 

their treatment of my worthy mrs norton is a sad confirmation of it 
a woman deserving of all consideration for her wisdom and every body
thinking so but who not being wealthy enough to have due weight in a
point against which she has given her opinion and which they seem
bent upon carrying is restrained from visiting here and even from
corresponding with me as i am this very day informed 

hatred to lovelace family aggrandizement and this great motive
paternal authority what a force united must they be supposed to have 
when singly each consideration is sufficient to carry all before it 

this is the formidable appearance which the address of this disagreeable
man wears at present 

my brother and my sister triumph they have got me down as hannah
overheard them exult and so they have yet i never knew that i
was insolently up for now my brother will either lay me under an
obligation to comply to my own unhappiness and so make me an instrument
of his revenge upon lovelace or if i refuse will throw me into
disgrace with my whole family 

who will wonder at the intrigues and plots carried on by undermining
courtiers against one another when a private family but three of which
can possibly have clashing interests and one of them as she presumes
to think above such low motives cannot be free from them 

what at present most concerns me is the peace of my mother's mind 
how can the husband of such a wife a good man too but oh this
prerogative of manhood be so positive so unpersuadable to one who
has brought into the family means which they know so well the value of 
that methinks they should value her the more for their sake 

they do indeed value her but i am sorry to say she has purchased
that value by her compliances yet has merit for which she ought to be
venerated prudence which ought of itself to be conformed to in every
thing 

but whither roves my pen how dare a perverse girl take these liberties
with relations so very respectable and whom she highly respects what
an unhappy situation is that which obliges her in her own defence as it
were to expose their failings 

but you who know how much i love and reverence my mother will judge
what a difficulty i am under to be obliged to oppose a scheme which she
has engaged in yet i must oppose it to comply is impossible and must
without delay declare my opposition or my difficulties will increase 
since as i am just now informed a lawyer has been this very day
consulted  would you have believed it   in relation to settlements 

were ours a roman catholic family how much happier for me that they
thought a nunnery would answer all their views how happy had not
a certain person slighted somebody all then would have been probably
concluded between them before my brother had arrived to thwart
the match then had i a sister which now i have not and two
brothers both aspiring possibly both titled while i should only have
valued that in either which is above title that which is truly noble in
both 

but by what a long-reaching selfishness is my brother governed by what
remote exceedingly remote views views which it is in the power of the
slightest accident of a fever for instance the seeds of which are
always vegetating as i may say and ready to burst forth in his own
impetuous temper or of the provoked weapon of an adversary to blow up
and destroy 

i will break off here let me write ever so freely of my friends i am
sure of your kind construction and i confide in your discretion that
you will avoid reading to or transcribing for others such passages as
may have the appearance of treating too freely the parental or even the
fraternal character or induce others to censure for a supposed failure
in duty to the one or decency to the other 

your truly affectionate cl harlowe 




letter xiv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday evening march 2 


on hannah's depositing my long letter begun yesterday but by reason
of several interruptions not finished till within this hour she found
and brought me yours of this day i thank you my dear for this kind
expedition these few lines will perhaps be time enough deposited to be
taken away by your servant with the other letter yet they are only to
thank you and to tell you my increasing apprehensions 

i must take or seek the occasion to apply to my mother for her
mediation for i am in danger of having a day fixed and antipathy taken
for bashfulness should not sisters be sisters to each other should
not they make a common cause of it as i may say a cause of sex on
such occasions as the present yet mine in support of my brother's
selfishness and no doubt in concert with him has been urging in full
assembly it seems and that with an earnestness peculiar to herself
when she sets upon any thing that an absolute day be given me and if
i comply not to be told that it shall be to the forfeiture of all my
fortunes and of all their love 

she need not be so officious my brother's interest without hers is
strong enough for he has found means to confederate all the family
against me upon some fresh provocation or new intelligence concerning
mr lovelace i know not what it is they have bound themselves or
are to bind themselves by a signed paper to one another  the lord
bless me my dear what shall i do   to carry their point in favour of
mr solmes in support of my father's authority as it is called and
against mr lovelace as a libertine and an enemy to the family and if
so i am sure i may say against me how impolitic in them all to join
two people in one interest whom they wish for ever to keep asunder 

what the discharged steward reported of him is surely bad enough what
mrs fortescue said not only confirms that bad but gives room to think
him still worse and yet the something further which my friends have
come at is of so heinous a nature as betty barnes tells hannah that
it proves him almost to be the worst of men but hang the man i
had almost said what is he to me what would he be were not this mr 
sol o my dear how i hate the man in the light he is proposed to me 

all of them at the same time are afraid of mr lovelace yet not
afraid to provoke him how am i entangled to be obliged to go on
corresponding with him for their sakes heaven forbid that their
persisted-in violence should so drive me as to make it necessary for my
own 

but surely they will yield indeed i cannot 

i believe the gentlest spirits when provoked causelessly and cruelly
provoked are the most determined the reason may be that not taking
up resolutions lightly their very deliberation makes them the more
immovable and then when a point is clear and self-evident how can
one with patience think of entering into an argument or contention upon
it 

an interruption obliges me to conclude myself in some hurry as well as
fright what i must ever be 

yours more than my own clarissa harlowe 




letter xv

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe friday march 3 


i have both your letters at once it is very unhappy my dear since
your friends will have you marry that a person of your merit should be
addressed by a succession of worthless creatures who have nothing but
their presumption for their excuse 

that these presumers appear not in this very unworthy light to some of
your friends is because their defects are not so striking to them
as to others and why shall i venture to tell you because they are
nearer their own standard modesty after all perhaps has a concern in
it for how should they think that a niece or sister of theirs  i will
not go higher for fear of incurring your displeasure  should be an
angel 

but where indeed is the man to be found who has the least share of due
diffidence that dares to look up to miss clarissa harlowe with hope or
with any thing but wishes thus the bold and forward not being sensible
of their defects aspire while the modesty of the really worthy fills
them with too much reverence to permit them to explain themselves hence
your symmes's your byron's your mullins's your wyerley's the best
of the herd and your solmes's in turn invade you wretches that 
looking upon the rest of your family need not despair of succeeding in
an alliance with it but to you what an inexcusable presumption 

yet i am afraid all opposition will be in vain you must you will i
doubt be sacrificed to this odious man i know your family there will
be no resisting such baits as he has thrown out o my dear my beloved
friend and are such charming qualities is such exalted merit to be
sunk in such a marriage you must not your uncle tells your mother 
dispute their authority authority what a full word is that in the
mouth of a narrow-minded person who happened to be born thirty years
before one of your uncles i speak for as to the paternal authority 
that ought to be sacred but should not parents have reason for what
they do 

wonder not however at your bell's unsisterly behaviour in this affair 
i have a particular to add to the inducements your insolent brother is
governed by which will account for all her driving you have already
owned that her outward eye was from the first struck with the figure
and address of the man whom she pretends to despise and who tis
certain thoroughly despises her but you have not told me that still
she loves him of all men bell has a meanness in her very pride that
meanness rises with her pride and goes hand in hand with it and no
one is so proud as bell she has owned her love her uneasy days 
and sleepless nights and her revenge grafted upon her love to her
favourite betty barnes to lay herself in the power of a servant's
tongue poor creature but like little souls will find one another
out and mingle as well as like great ones this however she told the
wench in strict confidence and thus by way of the female round-about 
as lovelace had the sauciness on such another occasion in ridicule of
our sex to call it betty pleased to be thought worthy of a secret 
and to have an opportunity of inveighing against lovelace's perfidy 
as she would have it to be told it to one of her confidants 
that confidant with like injunctions of secrecy to miss lloyd's
harriot harriot to miss lloyd miss lloyd to me i to you with leave
to make what you please of it 

and now you will not wonder to find miss bell an implacable rival 
rather than an affectionate sister and will be able to account for the
words witchcraft syren and such like thrown out against you and for
her driving on for a fixed day for sacrificing you to solmes in short 
for her rudeness and violence of every kind 

what a sweet revenge will she take as well upon lovelace as upon you 
if she can procure her rival sister to be married to the man that sister
hates and so prevent her having the man whom she herself loves whether
she have hope of him or not and whom she suspects her sister loves 

poisons and poniard have often been set to work by minds inflamed by
disappointed love and actuated by revenge will you wonder then that
the ties of relationship in such a case have no force and that a sister
forgets to be a sister 

now i know this to be her secret motive the more grating to her as
her pride is concerned to make her disavow it and can consider it
joined with her former envy and as strengthened by a brother who has
such an ascendant over the whole family and whose interest slave to it
as he always was engaged him to ruin you with every one both possessed
of the ears of all your family and having it as much in their power as
in their will to misrepresent all you say all you do such subject also
as to the rencounter and lovelace's want of morals to expatiate upon 
your whole family likewise avowedly attached to the odious man by means
of the captivating proposals he has made them when i consider all
these things i am full of apprehensions for you o my dear how will
you be able to maintain your ground i am sure alas i am too sure 
that they will subdue such a fine spirit as yours unused to opposition 
and tell it not in gath you must be mrs solmes 

mean time it is now easy as you will observe to guess from what
quarter the report i mentioned to you in one of my former came 
that the younger sister has robbed the elder of her lover for betty
whispered it at the time she whispered the rest that neither lovelace
nor you had done honourably by her young mistress how cruel my dear 
in you to rob the poor bella of the only lover she only had at the
instant too that she was priding herself that now at last she should
have it in her power not only to gratify her own susceptibilities but
to give an example to the flirts of her sex my worship's self in
her eye how to govern their man with a silken rein and without a
curb-bridle 


 letter i 

 letter ii 


upon the whole i have now no doubt of their persevering in favour of
the despicable solmes and of their dependence upon the gentleness of
your temper and the regard you have for their favour and for your own
reputation and now i am more than ever convinced of the propriety of
the advice i formerly gave you to keep in your own hands the estate
bequeathed to you by your grandfather had you done so it would have
procured you at least an outward respect from your brother and sister 
which would have made them conceal the envy and ill-will that now are
bursting upon you from hearts so narrow 

i must harp a little more upon this string do not you observe how much
your brother's influence has overtopped yours since he has got into
fortunes so considerable and since you have given some of them an
appetite to continue in themselves the possession of your estate unless
you comply with their terms 

i know your dutiful your laudable motives and one would have thought 
that you might have trusted to a father who so dearly loved you but had
you been actually in possession of that estate and living up to it and
upon it your youth protected from blighting tongues by the company
of your prudent norton as you had proposed do you think that your
brother grudging it to you at the time as he did and looking upon it
as his right as an only son would have been practising about it and
aiming at it i told you some time ago that i thought your trials but
proportioned to your prudence but you will be more than woman if
you can extricate yourself with honour having such violent spirits and
sordid minds in some and such tyrannical and despotic wills in others 
to deal with indeed all may be done and the world be taught further
to admire you for your blind duty and will-less resignation if you can
persuade yourself to be mrs solmes 


 letter i 


i am pleased with the instances you give me of mr lovelace's
benevolence to his own tenants and with his little gift to your
uncle's mrs fortescue allows him to be the best of landlords i might
have told you that had i thought it necessary to put you into some
little conceit of him he has qualities in short that may make him
a tolerable creature on the other side of fifty but god help the
poor woman to whose lot he shall fall till then women i should say 
perhaps since he may break half-a-dozen hearts before that time but
to the point i was upon shall we not have reason to commend the
tenant's grateful honesty if we are told that with joy the poor man
called out your uncle and on the spot paid him in part of his debt
those two guineas but what shall we say of that landlord who though
he knew the poor man to be quite destitute could take it and saying
nothing while mr lovelace staid as soon as he was gone tell of it in
praise of the poor fellow's honesty were this so and were not that
landlord related to my dearest friend how should i despise such a
wretch but perhaps the story is aggravated covetous people have
every one's ill word and so indeed they ought because they are
only solicitous to keep that which they prefer to every one's good
one covetous indeed would they be who deserved neither yet expected
both 

i long for your next letter continue to be as particular as possible 
i can think of no other subject but what relates to you and to your
affairs for i am and ever will be most affectionately 

your own anna howe 




letter xvi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe  her preceding not at that time
received   friday march 3 


o my dear friend i have had a sad conflict trial upon trial 
conference upon conference but what law what ceremony can give a
man a right to a heart which abhors him more than it does any living
creature 

i hope my mother will be able to prevail for me but i will recount it
all though i sit up the whole night to do it for i have a vast deal to
write and will be as minute as you wish me to be 

i concluded my last in a fright it was occasioned by a conversation
that passed between my mother and my aunt part of which hannah
overheard i need not give you the particulars since what i have to
relate to you from different conversations that have passed between my
mother and me in the space of a very few hours will include them all 
i will begin then 

i went down this morning when breakfast was ready with a very uneasy
heart from what hannah had informed me of yesterday afternoon wishing
for an opportunity however to appeal to my mother in hopes to engage
her interest in my behalf and purposing to try to find one when she
retired to her own apartment after breakfast but unluckily there was
the odious solmes sitting asquat between my mother and sister with so
much assurance in his looks but you know my dear that those we love
not cannot do any thing to please us 

had the wretch kept his seat it might have been well enough but the
bend and broad-shouldered creature must needs rise and stalk towards a
chair which was just by that which was set for me 

i removed it to a distance as if to make way to my own and down i sat 
abruptly i believe what i had heard all in my head 

but this was not enough to daunt him the man is a very confident he is
a very bold staring man indeed my dear the man is very confident 

he took the removed chair and drew it so near mine squatting in it
with his ugly weight that he pressed upon my hoop i was so offended
 all i had heard as i said in my head that i removed to another
chair i own i had too little command of myself it gave my brother
and sister too much advantage i day say they took it but i did it
involuntarily i think i could not help it i knew not what i did 

i saw that my father was excessively displeased when angry no man's
countenance ever shews it so much as my father's clarissa harlowe said
he with a big voice and there he stopped sir said i trembling and
courtesying for i had not then sat down again and put my chair nearer
the wretch and sat down my face as i could feel all in a glow 

make tea child said my kind mamma sit by me love and make tea 

i removed with pleasure to the seat the man had quitted and being
thus indulgently put into employment soon recovered myself and in the
course of the breakfasting officiously asked two or three questions
of mr solmes which i would not have done but to make up with my
father proud spirits may be brought to whisperingly spoke my sister
to me over her shoulder with an air of triumph and scorn but i did
not mind her 

my mother was all kindness and condescension i asked her once if she
were pleased with the tea she said softly and again called me dear 
she was pleased with all i did i was very proud of this encouraging
goodness and all blew over as i hoped between my father and me for
he also spoke kindly to me two or three times 

small accidents these my dear to trouble you with only as they lead
to greater as you shall hear 

before the usual breakfast-time was over my father withdrew with my
mother telling her he wanted to speak with her then my sister and next
my aunt who was with us dropt away 

my brother gave himself some airs of insult which i understood well
enough but which mr solmes could make nothing of and at last he arose
from his seat sister said he i have a curiosity to shew you i will
fetch it and away he went shutting the door close after him 

i saw what all this was for i arose the man hemming up for a speech 
rising and beginning to set his splay-feet  indeed my dear the man in
all his ways is hateful to me  in an approaching posture i will
save my brother the trouble of bringing to me his curiosity said i i
courtesied your servant sir the man cried madam madam twice and
looked like a fool but away i went to find my brother to save my
word but my brother indifferent as the weather was was gone to
walk in the garden with my sister a plain case that he had left his
curiosity with me and designed to shew me no other 

i had but just got into my own apartment and began to think of sending
hannah to beg an audience of my mother the more encouraged by her
condescending goodness at breakfast when shorey her woman brought me
her commands to attend me in her closet 

my father hannah told me was just gone out of it with a positive angry
countenance then i as much dreaded the audience as i had wished for it
before 

i went down however but apprehending the subject she intended to
talk to me upon approached her trembling and my heart in visible
palpitations 

she saw my concern holding out her kind arms as she sat come kiss
me my dear said she with a smile like a sun-beam breaking through
the cloud that overshadowed her naturally benign aspect why flutters my
jewel so 

this preparative sweetness with her goodness just before confirmed my
apprehensions my mother saw the bitter pill wanted gilding 

o my mamma was all i could say and i clasped my arms round her neck 
and my face sunk into her bosom 

my child my child restrain said she your powers of moving i dare
not else trust myself with you and my tears trickled down her bosom 
as hers bedewed my neck 

o the words of kindness all to be expressed in vain that flowed from
her lips 

lift up your sweet face my best child my own clarissa harlowe o my
daughter best beloved of my heart lift up a face so ever amiable to
me why these sobs is an apprehended duty so affecting a thing that
before i can speak but i am glad my love you can guess at what i have
to say to you i am spared the pains of breaking to you what was a task
upon me reluctantly enough undertaken to break to you then rising she
drew a chair near her own and made me sit down by her overwhelmed as i
was with tears of apprehension of what she had to say and of gratitude
for her truly maternal goodness to me sobs still my only language 

and drawing her chair still nearer to mine she put her arms round my
neck and my glowing cheek wet with my tears close to her own let me
talk to you my child since silence is your choice hearken to me and
be silent 

you know my dear what i every day forego and undergo for the sake of
peace your papa is a very good man and means well but he will not
be controuled nor yet persuaded you have sometimes seemed to pity me 
that i am obliged to give up every point poor man his reputation the
less for it mine the greater yet would i not have this credit if
i could help it at so dear a rate to him and to myself you are a
dutiful a prudent and a wise child she was pleased to say in hope 
no doubt to make me so you would not add i am sure to my trouble 
you would not wilfully break that peace which costs your mother so much
to preserve obedience is better than sacrifice o my clary harlowe 
rejoice my heart by telling me that i have apprehended too much i see
your concern i see your perplexity i see your conflict  loosing
her arm and rising not willing i should see how much she herself
was affected  i will leave you a moment answer me not  for i was
essaying to speak and had as soon as she took her dear cheek from
mine dropt down on my knees my hands clasped and lifted up in
a supplicating manner  i am not prepared for your irresistible
expostulation she was pleased to say i will leave you to recollection 
and i charge you on my blessing that all this my truly maternal
tenderness be not thrown away upon you 

and then she withdrew into the next apartment wiping her eyes as she
went from me as mine overflowed my heart taking in the whole compass
of her meaning 

she soon returned having recovered more steadiness 

still on my knees i had thrown my face across the chair she had sat in 

look up to me my clary harlowe no sullenness i hope 

no indeed my ever-to-be-revered mamma and i arose i bent my knee 

she raised me no kneeling to me but with knees of duty and compliance 
your heart not your knees must bend it is absolutely determined 
prepare yourself therefore to receive your father when he visits you
by-and-by as he would wish to receive you but on this one quarter of
an hour depends the peace of my future life the satisfaction of all the
family and your own security from a man of violence and i charge you
besides on my blessing that you think of being mrs solmes 

there went the dagger to my heart and down i sunk and when i
recovered found myself in the arms of my hannah my sister's betty
holding open my reluctantly-opened palm my laces cut my linen scented
with hartshorn and my mother gone had i been less kindly treated the
hated name still forborne to be mentioned or mentioned with a little
more preparation and reserve i had stood the horrid sound with less
visible emotion but to be bid on the blessing of a mother so dearly
beloved so truly reverenced to think of being mrs solmes what a
denunciation was that 

shorey came in with a message delivered in her solemn way your mamma 
miss is concerned for your disorder she expects you down again in an
hour and bid me say that she then hopes every thing from your duty 

i made no reply for what could i say and leaning upon my hannah's arm 
withdrew to my own apartment there you will guess how the greatest part
of the hour was employed 

within that time my mother came up to me 

i love she was pleased to say to come into this apartment no
emotions child no flutters am i not your mother do not discompose
me by discomposing yourself do not occasion me uneasiness when i
would give you nothing but pleasure come my dear we will go into your
closet 

she took my hand led the way and made me sit down by her and after
she had inquired how i did she began in a strain as if she supposed i
had made use of the intervening space to overcome all my objections 

she was pleased to tell me that my father and she in order to spare my
natural modesty had taken the whole affair upon themselves 

hear me out and then speak he is not indeed every thing i wish him to
be but he is a man of probity and has no vices 

no vices madam 

hear me out child you have not behaved much amiss to him we have
seen with pleasure that you have not 

o madam must i not now speak 

i shall have done presently a young creature of your virtuous and
pious turn she was pleased to say cannot surely love a profligate you
love your brother too well to wish to marry one who had like to have
killed him and who threatened your uncles and defies us all you have
had your own way six or seven times we want to secure you against a man
so vile tell me i have a right to know whether you prefer this man
to all others yet god forbid that i should know you do for such
a declaration would make us all miserable yet tell me are your
affections engaged to this man 

i knew not what the inference would be if i said they were not 

you hesitate you answer me not you cannot answer me rising never
more will i look upon you with an eye of favour 

o madam madam kill me not with your displeasure i would not i need
not hesitate one moment did i not dread the inference if i answer
you as you wish yet be that inference what it will your threatened
displeasure will make me speak and i declare to you that i know not my
own heart if it not be absolutely free and pray let me ask my dearest
mamma in what has my conduct been faulty that like a giddy creature 
i must be forced to marry to save me from from what let me beseech
you madam to be the guardian of my reputation let not your clarissa
be precipitated into a state she wishes not to enter into with any man 
and this upon a supposition that otherwise she shall marry herself and
disgrace her whole family 

well then clary  passing over the force of my plea  if your heart be
free 

o my beloved mamma let the usual generosity of your dear heart operate
in my favour urge not upon me the inference that made me hesitate 

i won't be interrupted clary you have seen in my behaviour to you 
on this occasion a truly maternal tenderness you have observed that
i have undertaken the task with some reluctance because the man is not
every thing and because i know you carry your notions of perfection in
a man too high 

dearest madam this one time excuse me is there then any danger that i
should be guilty of an imprudent thing for the man's sake you hint at 

again interrupted am i to be questioned and argued with you know
this won't do somewhere else you know it won't what reason then 
ungenerous girl can you have for arguing with me thus but because you
think from my indulgence to you you may 

what can i say what can i do what must that cause be that will not
bear being argued upon 

again clary harlowe 

dearest madam forgive me it was always my pride and my pleasure to
obey you but look upon that man see but the disagreeableness of his
person 

now clary do i see whose person you have in your eye now is mr 
solmes i see but comparatively disagreeable disagreeable only as
another man has a much more specious person

but madam are not his manners equally so is not his person the true
representative of his mind that other man is not shall not be any
thing to me release me but from this one man whom my heart unbidden 
resists 

condition thus with your father will he bear do you think to be thus
dialogued with have i not conjured you as you value my peace what
is it that i do not give up this very task because i apprehended you
would not be easily persuaded is a task indeed upon me and will you
give up nothing have you not refused as many as have been offered to
you if you would not have us guess for whom comply for comply you
must or be looked upon as in a state of defiance with your whole
family 

and saying this she arose and went from me but at the chamber-door
stopt and turned back i will not say below in what a disposition i
leave you consider of every thing the matter is resolved upon as you
value your father's blessing and mine and the satisfaction of all the
family resolve to comply i will leave you for a few moments i will
come up to you again see that i find you as i wish to find you and
since your heart is free let your duty govern it 

in about half an hour my mother returned she found me in tears 
she took my hand it is my part evermore said she to be of the
acknowledging side i believe i have needlessly exposed myself to your
opposition by the method i have taken with you i first began as if i
expected a denial and by my indulgence brought it upon myself 

do not my dearest mamma do not say so 

were the occasion for this debate proceeded she to have risen from
myself were it in my power to dispense with your compliance you too
well know what you can do with me 

would any body my dear miss howe wish to marry who sees a wife of
such a temper and blessed with such an understanding as my mother is
noted for not only deprived of all power but obliged to be even active
in bringing to bear a point of high importance which she thinks ought
not to be insisted upon 

when i came to you a second time proceeded she knowing that your
opposition would avail you nothing i refused to hear your reasons and
in this i was wrong too because a young creature who loves to reason 
and used to love to be convinced by reason ought to have all her
objections heard i now therefore this third time see you and am
come resolved to hear all you have to say and let me my dear by my
patience engage your gratitude your generosity i will call it because
it is to you i speak who used to have a mind wholly generous let me 
if your heart be really free let me see what it will induce you to do
to oblige me and so as you permit your usual discretion to govern you 
i will hear all you have to say but with this intimation that say what
you will it will be of no avail elsewhere 

what a dreadful saying is that but could i engage your pity madam it
would be somewhat 

you have as much of my pity as of my love but what is person clary 
with one of your prudence and your heart disengaged 

should the eye be disgusted when the heart is to be engaged o
madam who can think of marrying when the heart is shocked at the
first appearance and where the disgust must be confirmed by every
conversation afterwards 

this clary is owing to your prepossession let me not have cause
to regret that noble firmness of mind in so young a creature which i
thought your glory and which was my boast in your character in this
instance it would be obstinacy and want of duty have you not made
objections to several 

that was to their minds to their principles madam but this man 

is an honest man clary harlowe he has a good mind he is a virtuous
man 

he an honest man his a good mind madam he a virtuous man 

nobody denies these qualities 

can he be an honest man who offers terms that will rob all his own
relations of their just expectations can his mind be good 

you clary harlowe for whose sake he offers so much are the last
person who should make this observation 

give me leave to say madam that a person preferring happiness to
fortune as i do that want not even what i have and can give up the
use of that as an instance of duty 

no more no more of your merits you know you will be a gainer by that
cheerful instance of your duty not a loser you know you have but
cast your bread upon the waters so no more of that for it is not
understood as a merit by every body i assure you though i think it a
high one and so did your father and uncles at the time 

at the time madam how unworthily do my brother and sister who are
afraid that the favour i was so lately in 

i hear nothing against your brother and sister what family feuds have i
in prospect at a time when i hoped to have most comfort from you all 


god bless my brother and sister in all their worthy views you shall
have no family feuds if i can prevent them you yourself madam shall
tell me what i shall bear from them and i will bear it but let my
actions not their misrepresentations as i am sure by the disgraceful
prohibitions i have met with has been the case speak for me 

just then up came my father with a sternness in his looks that made me
tremble he took two or three turns about my chamber though pained by
his gout and then said to my mother who was silent as soon as she saw
him 

my dear you are long absent dinner is near ready what you had to
say lay in a very little compass surely you have nothing to do but
to declare your will and my will but perhaps you may be talking of the
preparations let us have you soon down your daughter in your hand if
worthy of the name 

and down he went casting his eye upon me with a look so stern that
i was unable to say one word to him or even for a few minutes to my
mother 

was not this very intimidating my dear 

my mother seeing my concern seemed to pity me she called me her good
child and kissed me and told me that my father should not know i had
made such opposition he has kindly furnished us with an excuse for
being so long together said she come my dear dinner will be upon
table presently shall we go down and took my hand 

this made me start what madam go down to let it be supposed we were
talking of preparations o my beloved mamma command me not down upon
such a supposition 

you see child that to stay longer together will be owning that you
are debating about an absolute duty and that will not be borne did not
your father himself some days ago tell you he would be obeyed i will a
third time leave you i must say something by way of excuse for you 
and that you desire not to go down to dinner that your modesty on the
occasion 

o madam say not my modesty on such an occasion for that will be to
give hope 

and design you not to give hope perverse girl rising and flinging
from me take more time for consideration since it is necessary take
more time and when i see you next let me know what blame i have to
cast upon myself or to bear from your father for my indulgence to you 

she made however a little stop at the chamber-door and seemed to
expect that i would have besought her to make the gentlest construction
for me for hesitating she was pleased to say i suppose you would not
have me make a report 

o madam interrupted i whose favour can i hope for if i lose my
mamma's 

to have desired a favourable report you know my dear would have been
qualifying upon a point that i was too much determined upon to give
room for any of my friends to think i have the least hesitation about
it and so my mother went down stairs 

i will deposit thus far and as i know you will not think me too minute
in the relation of particulars so very interesting to one you honour
with your love proceed in the same way as matters stand i don't care
to have papers so freely written about me 

pray let robert call every day if you can spare him whether i have any
thing ready or not 

i should be glad you would not send him empty handed what a generosity
will it be in you to write as frequently from friendship as i am
forced to do from misfortune the letters being taken away will be an
assurance that you have them as i shall write and deposit as i have
opportunity the formality of super and sub-scription will be excused 
for i need not say how much i am

your sincere and ever affectionate cl harlowe 




letter xvii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


my mother on her return which was as soon as she had dined was
pleased to inform me that she told my father on his questioning her
about my cheerul compliance for it seems the cheerful was all that
was doubted that she was willing on so material a point to give
a child whom she had so much reason to love as she condescended to
acknowledge were her words liberty to say all that was in her heart to
say that her compliance might be the freer letting him know that
when he came up she was attending to my pleas for that she found i had
rather not marry at all 

she told me that to this my father angrily said let her take
care let her take care that she give me not ground to suspect her of
a preference somewhere else but if it be to ease her heart and not to
dispute my will you may hear her out 

so clary said my mother i am returned in a temper accordingly and i
hope you will not again by your peremptoriness shew me how i ought to
treat you 

indeed madam you did me justice to say i have no inclination to marry
at all i have not i hope made myself so very unuseful in my papa's
family as 

no more of your merits clary you have been a good child you have
eased me of all the family cares but do not now give more than ever
you relieved me from you have been amply repaid in the reputation
your skill and management have given you but now there is soon to be a
period to all those assistances from you if you marry there will be
a natural and if to please us a desirable period because your own
family will employ all your talents in that way if you do not there
will be a period likewise but not a natural one you understand me 
child 

i wept 

i have made inquiry already after a housekeeper i would have had your
good norton but i suppose you will yourself wish to have the worthy
woman with you if you desire it that shall be agreed upon for you 

but why dearest madam why am i the youngest to be precipitated into
a state that i am very far from wishing to enter into with any body 

you are going to question me i suppose why your sister is not thought
of for mr solmes 

i hope madam it will not displease you if i were 

i might refer you for an answer to your father mr solmes has reasons
for preferring you 

and i have reasons madam for disliking him and why i am 

this quickness upon me interrupted my mother is not to be borne i am
gone and your father comes if i can do no good with you 

o madam i would rather die than 

she put her hand to my mouth no peremptoriness clary harlowe once you
declare yourself inflexible i have done 

i wept for vexation this is all all my brother's doings his grasping
views 

no reflections upon your brother he has entirely the honour of the
family at heart 

i would no more dishonour my family madam than my brother would 

i believe it but i hope you will allow your father and me and your
uncles to judge what will do it honour what dishonour 

i then offered to live single never to marry at all or never but with
their full approbation 

if you mean to shew your duty and your obedience clary you must shew
it in our way not in your own 

i hope madam that i have not so behaved hitherto as to render such a
trial of my obedience necessary 

yes clary i cannot but say that you have hitherto behaved extremely
well but you have had no trials till now and i hope that now you are
called to one you will not fail in it parents proceeded she when
children are young are pleased with every thing they do you have been
a good child upon the whole but we have hitherto rather complied with
you than you with us now that you are grown up to marriageable years 
is the test especially as your grandfather has made you independent as
we may say in preference to those who had prior expectations upon that
estate 

madam my grandfather knew and expressly mentioned in his will his
desire that my father will more than make it up to my sister i did
nothing but what i thought my duty to procure his favour it was rather
a mark of his affection than any advantage to me for do i either
seek or wish to be independent were i to be queen of the universe that
dignity should not absolve me from my duty to you and to my father i
would kneel for your blessings were it in the presence of millions so
that 

i am loth to interrupt you clary though you could more than once break
in upon me you are young and unbroken but with all this ostentation
of your duty i desire you to shew a little more deference to me when i
am speaking 

i beg your pardon dear madam and your patience with me on such an
occasion as this if i did not speak with earnestness upon it i should
be supposed to have only maidenly objections against a man i never can
endure 

clary harlowe 

dearest dearest madam permit me to speak what i have to say this
once it is hard it is very hard to be forbidden to enter into
the cause of all these misunderstandings because i must not speak
disrespectfully of one who supposes me in the way of his ambition and
treats me like a slave 

whither whither clary 

my dearest mamma my duty will not permit me so far to suppose my
father arbitrary as to make a plea of that arbitrariness to you 

how now clary o girl 

your patience my dearest mamma you were pleased to say you would
hear me with patience person in a man is nothing because i am
supposed to be prudent so my eye is to be disgusted and my reason not
convinced 

girl girl 

thus are my imputed good qualities to be made my punishment and i am to
wedded to a monster 

 astonishing can this clarissa be from you 

the man madam person and mind is a monster in my eye   and that
i may be induced to bear this treatment i am to be complimented with
being indifferent to all men yet at other times and to serve other
purposes be thought prepossessed in favour of a man against whose moral
character lie just objections confined as if like the giddiest of
creatures i would run away with this man and disgrace my whole family 
o my dearest mamma who can be patient under such treatment 

now clary i suppose you will allow me to speak i think i have had
patience indeed with you could i have thought but i will put all upon
a short issue your mother clarissa shall shew you an example of that
patience you so boldly claim from her without having any yourself 

o my dear how my mother's condescension distressed me at the
time infinitely more distressed me than rigour could have done but
she knew she was to be sure aware that she was put upon a harsh upon
an unreasonable service let me say or she would not she could not 
have had so much patience with me 

let me tell you then proceeded she that all lies in a small compass 
as your father said you have been hitherto as you are pretty ready to
plead a dutiful child you have indeed had no cause to be otherwise no
child was ever more favoured whether you will discredit all your past
behaviour whether at a time and upon an occasion that the highest
instance of duty is expected from you an instance that is to crown
all and when you declare that your heart is free you will give that
instance or whether having a view to the independence you may claim 
 for so clary whatever be your motive it will be judged and which
any man you favour can assert for you against us all or rather for
himself in spite of us whether i say you will break with us all 
and stand in defiance of a jealous father needlessly jealous i will
venture to say of the prerogatives of his sex as to me and still ten
times more jealous of the authority of a father this is now the point
with us you know your father has made it a point and did he ever give
up one he thought he had a right to carry 

too true thought i to myself and now my brother has engaged my father 
his fine scheme will walk alone without needing his leading-strings 
and it is become my father's will that i oppose not my brother's
grasping views 

i was silent to say the truth i was just then sullenly silent my
heart was too big i thought it was hard to be thus given up by
my mother and that she should make a will so uncontroulable as my
brother's her will my mother my dear though i must not say so was
not obliged to marry against her liking my mother loved my father 

my silence availed me still less 

i see my dear said she that you are convinced now my good
child now my clary do i love you it shall not be known that you
have argued with me at all all shall be imputed to that modesty which
has ever so much distinguished you you shall have the full merit of
your resignation 

i wept 

she tenderly wiped the tears from my eyes and kissed my cheek your
father expects you down with a cheerful countenance but i will excuse
your going all your scruples you see have met with an indulgence
truly maternal from me i rejoice in the hope that you are convinced 
this indeed seems to be a proof of the truth of your agreeable
declaration that your heart is free 

did not this seem to border upon cruelty my dear in so indulgent a
mother it would be wicked  would it not  to suppose my mother capable
of art but she is put upon it and obliged to take methods to which
her heart is naturally above stooping and all intended for my good 
because she sees that no arguing will be admitted any where else 

i will go down proceeded she and excuse your attendance at afternoon
tea as i did to dinner for i know you will have some little
reluctances to subdue i will allow you those and also some little
natural shynesses and so you shall not come down if you chuse not to
come down only my dear do not disgrace my report when you come to
supper and be sure behave as you used to do to your brother and sister 
for your behaviour to them will be one test of your cheerful obedience
to us i advise as a friend you see rather than command as a
mother so adieu my love and again she kissed me and was going 

o my dear mamma said i forgive me but surely you cannot believe i
can ever think of having that man 

she was very angry and seemed to be greatly disappointed she
threatened to turn me over to my father and uncles she however bid
me generously bid me consider what a handle i gave to my brother
and sister if i thought they had views to serve by making my uncles
dissatisfied with me 

i said she in a milder accent have early said all that i thought
could be said against the present proposal on a supposition that
you who have refused several other whom i own to be preferable as to
person would not approve of it and could i have succeeded you 
clary had never heard of it but if i could not how can you expect
to prevail my great ends in the task i have undertaken are the
preservation of the family peace so likely to be overturned to
reinstate you in the affections of your father and uncles and to
preserve you from a man of violence your father you must needs think
will flame out upon your refusal to comply your uncles are so

thoroughly convinced of the consistency of the measure with their
favourite views of aggrandizing the family that they are as much
determined as your father your aunt hervey and your uncle hervey are of
the same party and it is hard if a father and mother and uncles and
aunt all conjoined cannot be allowed to direct your choice surely my
dear girl proceeded she  for i was silent all this time  it cannot be
that you are the more averse because the family views will be promoted
by the match this i assure you is what every body must think if
you comply not nor while the man so obnoxious to us all remains
unmarried and buzzes about you will the strongest wishes to live
single be in the least regarded and well you know that were mr 
lovelace an angel and your father had made it a point that you should
not have him it would be in vain to dispute his will as to the
prohibition laid upon you much as i will own against my liking that
is owing to the belief that you corresponded by miss howe's means with
that man nor do i doubt that you did so 

i answered to every article in such a manner as i am sure would have
satisfied her could she have been permitted to judge for herself and i
then inveighed with bitterness against the disgraceful prohibitions laid
upon me 

they would serve to shew me she was pleased to say how much in earnest
my father was they might be taken off whenever i thought fit and no
harm done nor disgrace received but if i were to be contumacious i
might thank myself for all that would follow 

i sighed i wept i was silent 

shall i clary said she shall i tell your father that these
prohibitions are as unnecessary as i hoped they would be that you know
your duty and will not offer to controvert his will what say you my
love 

o madam what can i say to questions so indulgently put i do indeed
know my duty no creature in the world is more willing to practise
it but pardon me dearest madam if i say that i must bear these
prohibitions if i am to pay so dear to have them taken off 

determined and perverse my dear mamma called me and after walking
twice or thrice in anger about the room she turned to me your
heart free clarissa how can you tell me your heart is free such
extraordinary prepossessions to a particular person must be owing to
extraordinary prepossessions in another's favour tell me clary and
tell me truly do you not continue to correspond with mr lovelace 

dearest madam replied i you know my motives to prevent mischief i
answered his letters the reasons for our apprehensions of this sort are
not over 

i own to you clary although now i would not have it known that
i once thought a little qualifying among such violent spirits was not
amiss i did not know but all things would come round again by the
mediation of lord m and his two sisters but as they all three think
proper to resent for their nephew and as their nephew thinks fit to
defy us all and as terms are offered on the other hand that could
not be asked which will very probably prevent your grandfather's estate
going out of the family and may be a means to bring still greater into
it i see not that the continuance of your correspondence with him
either can or ought to be permitted i therefore now forbid it to you 
as you value my favour 

be pleased madam only to advise me how to break it off with safety to
my brother and uncles and it is all i wish for would to heaven the
man so hated had not the pretence to make of having been too violently
treated when he meant peace and reconciliation it would always have
been in my own power to have broke with him his reputed immoralities
would have given me a just pretence at any time to do so but madam as
my uncles and my brother will keep no measures as he has heard what the
view is and his regard for me from resenting their violent treatment
of him and his family what can i do would you have me madam make him
desperate 

the law will protect us child offended magistracy will assert itself 

but madam may not some dreadful mischief first happen the law
asserts not itself till it is offended 

you have made offers clary if you might be obliged in the point in
question are you really in earnest were you to be complied with to
break off all correspondence with mr lovelace let me know this 

indeed i am and i will you madam shall see all the letters that
have passed between us you shall see i have given him no encouragement
independent of my duty and when you have seen them you will be
better able to direct me how on the condition i have offered to break
entirely with him 

i take you at your word clarissa give me his letters and the copies
of yours 

i am sure madam you will keep the knowledge that i write and what i
write 

no conditions with your mother surely my prudence may be trusted to 

i begged her pardon and besought her to take the key of the private
drawer in my escritoire where they lay that she herself might see that
i had no reserves to my mother 

she did and took all his letters and the copies of
mine unconditioned with she was pleased to say they shall be yours
again unseen by any body else 

i thanked her and she withdrew to read them saying she would return
them when she had 


 


you my dear have seen all the letters that passed between mr lovelace
and me till my last return from you you have acknowledged that he has
nothing to boast of from them three others i have received since by
the private conveyance i told you of the last i have not yet answered 

in these three as in those you have seen after having besought my
favour and in the most earnest manner professed the ardour of his
passion for me and set forth the indignities done him the defiances
my brother throws out against him in all companies the menaces and
hostile appearance of my uncles wherever they go and the methods they
take to defame him he declares that neither his own honour nor
the honour of his family involved as that is in the undistinguishing
reflection cast upon him for an unhappy affair which he would have
shunned but could not permit him to bear these confirmed indignities 
that as my inclinations if not favourable to him cannot be nor are 
to such a man as the newly-introduced solmes he is interested the more
to resent my brother's behaviour who to every body avows his rancour
and malice and glories in the probability he has through the address
of this solmes of mortifying me and avenging himself on him that
it is impossible he should not think himself concerned to frustrate a
measure so directly levelled at him had he not a still higher motive
for hoping to frustrate it that i must forgive him if he enter into
conference with solmes upon it he earnestly insists upon what he has
so often proposed that i will give him leave in company with lord
m to wait upon my uncles and even upon my father and he promises
patience if new provocations absolutely beneath a man to bear be not
given  which by the way i am far from being able to engage for 

in my answer i absolutely declare as i tell him i have often done 
that he is to expect no favour from me against the approbation of my
friends that i am sure their consents for his visiting any of them
will never be obtained that i will not be either so undutiful or so
indiscreet as to suffer my interests to be separated from the interests
of my family for any man upon earth that i do not think myself obliged
to him for the forbearance i desire one flaming spirit to have with
others that in this desire i require nothing of him but what prudence 
justice and the laws of his country require that if he has any
expectations of favour from me on that account he deceives himself 
that i have no inclination as i have often told him to change my
condition that i cannot allow myself to correspond with him any longer
in this clandestine manner it is mean low undutiful i tell him and
has a giddy appearance which cannot be excused that therefore he is
not to expect that i will continue it 

to this in his last among other things he replies that if i am
actually determined to break off all correspondence with him he must
conclude that it is with a view to become the wife of a man whom no
woman of honour and fortune can think tolerable and in that case i
must excuse him for saying that he shall neither be able to bear the
thoughts of losing for ever a person in whom all his present and all his
future hopes are centred nor support himself with patience under the
insolent triumphs of my brother upon it but that nevertheless he will
not threaten either his own life or that of any other man he must take
his resolutions as such a dreaded event shall impel him at the time if
he shall know that it will have my consent he must endeavour to resign
to his destiny but if it be brought about by compulsion he shall not
be able to answer for the consequence 

i will send you these letters for your perusal in a few days i would
enclose them but that it is possible something may happen which may
make my mother require to re-peruse them when you see them you will
observe how he endeavours to hold me to this correspondence 


 


in about an hour my mother returned take your letters clary i have
nothing she was pleased to say to tax your discretion with as to the
wording of yours to him you have even kept up a proper dignity as
well as observed all the rules of decorum and you have resented as you
ought to resent his menacing invectives in a word i see not that he
can form the least expectations from what you have written that you
will encourage the passion he avows for you but does he not avow his
passion have you the least doubt about what must be the issue of this
correspondence if continued and do you yourself think when you know
the avowed hatred of one side and he declared defiances of the other 
that this can be that it ought to be a match 

by no means it can madam you will be pleased to observed that i have
said as much to him but now madam that the whole correspondence
is before you i beg your commands what to do in a situation so very
disagreeable 

one thing i will tell you clary but i charge you as you would not
have me question the generosity of your spirit to take no advantage
of it either mentally or verbally that i am so much pleased with the
offer of your keys to me made in so cheerful and unreserved a manner 
and in the prudence you have shewn in your letters that were it
practicable to bring every one or your father only into my opinion i
should readily leave all the rest to your discretion reserving only to
myself the direction or approbation of your future letters and to see 
that you broke off the correspondence as soon as possible but as it is
not and as i know your father would have no patience with you should
it be acknowledged that you correspond with mr lovelace or that you
have corresponded with him since the time he prohibited you to do so 
i forbid you to continue such a liberty yet as the case is difficult 
let me ask you what you yourself can propose your heart you say is
free your own that you cannot think as matters circumstanced that
a match with a man so obnoxious as he now is to us all is proper to
be thought of what do you propose to do what clary are your own
thoughts of the matter 

without hesitation thus i answered what i humbly propose is
this that i will write to mr lovelace for i have not answered his
last that he has nothing to do between my father and me that i
neither ask his advice nor need it but that since he thinks he has some
pretence for interfering because of my brother's avowal of the interest
of mr solmes in displeasure to him i will assure him without giving
him any reason to impute the assurance to be in the least favourable to
himself that i will never be that man's  and if proceeded i i
may never be permitted to give him this assurance and mr solmes in
consequence of it be discouraged from prosecuting his address let mr 
lovelace be satisfied or dissatisfied i will go no farther nor write
another line to him nor ever see him more if i can avoid it and i
shall have a good excuse for it without bringing in any of my family 

ah my love but what shall we do about the terms mr solmes offers 
those are the inducements with every body he has even given hopes to
your brother that he will make exchanges of estates or at least that
he will purchase the northern one for you know it must be entirely
consistent with the family-views that we increase our interest in this
country your brother in short has given a plan that captivates us
all and a family so rich in all its branches and that has its views to
honour must be pleased to see a very great probability of taking rank
one day among the principal in the kingdom 

and for the sake of these views for the sake of this plan of my
brother's am i madam to be given in marriage to a man i can never
endure o my dear mamma save me save me if you can from this heavy
evil i had rather be buried alive indeed i had than have that man 

she chid me for my vehemence but was so good as to tell me that she
would sound my uncle harlowe who was then below and if he encouraged
her or would engage to second her she would venture to talk to my
father herself and i should hear further in the morning 

she went down to tea and kindly undertook to excuse my attendance at
supper 

but is it not a sad thing i repeat to be obliged to stand in
opposition to the will of such a mother why as i often say to myself 
was such a man as this solmes fixed upon the only man in the world 
surely that could offer so much and deserve so little 

little indeed does he deserve why my dear the man has the most
indifferent of characters every mouth is opened against him for his
sordid ways a foolish man to be so base-minded when the difference
between the obtaining of a fame for generosity and incurring the
censure of being a miser will not prudently managed cost fifty pounds
a year 

what a name have you got at a less expense and what an opportunity had
he of obtaining credit at a very small one succeeding such a wretched
creature as sir oliver in fortunes so vast yet has he so behaved 
that the common phrase is applied to him that sir oliver will never be
dead while mr solmes lives 

the world as i have often thought ill-natured as it is said to be is
generally more just in characters speaking by what it feels than is
usually apprehended and those who complain most of its censoriousness 
perhaps should look inwardly for the occasion oftener than they do 

my heart is a little at ease on the hopes that my mother will be able
to procure favour for me and a deliverance from this man and so i
have leisure to moralize but if i had not i should not forbear to
intermingle occasionally these sorts of remarks because you command
me never to omit them when they occur to my mind and not to be able
to make them even in a more affecting situation when one sits down
to write would shew one's self more engaged to self and to one's own
concerns than attentive to the wishes of a friend if it be said that
it is natural so to be what makes that nature on occasions where a
friend may be obliged or reminded of a piece of instruction which
 writing down one's self may be the better for but a fault which it
would set a person above nature to subdue 




letter xviii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sat mar 4 


would you not have thought something might have been obtained in my
favour from an offer so reasonable from an expedient so proper as i
imagine to put a tolerable end as from myself to a correspondence i
hardly know how otherwise with safety to some of my family to get rid
of but my brother's plan which my mother spoke of and of which i
have in vain endeavoured to procure a copy with a design to take it to
pieces and expose it as i question not there is room to do joined
with my father's impatience of contradiction are irresistible 

i have not been in bed all night nor am i in the least drowsy 
expectation and hope and doubt an uneasy state kept me
sufficiently wakeful i stept down at my usual time that it might not
be known i had not been in bed and gave directions in the family way 

about eight o'clock shorey came to me from my mother with orders to
attend her in her chamber 

my mother had been weeping i saw by her eyes but her aspect seemed to
be less tender and less affectionate than the day before and this as
soon as i entered into her presence struck me with an awe which gave a
great damp to my spirits 

sit down clary harlowe i shall talk to you by-and-by and continued
looking into a drawer among laces and linens in a way neither busy nor
unbusy 

i believe it was a quarter of an hour before she spoke to me my heart
throbbing with the suspense all the time and then she asked me coldly 
what directions i had given for the day 

i shewed her the bill of fare for this day and to-morrow if i said 
it pleased her to approve of it 

she made a small alteration in it but with an air so cold and so
solemn as added to my emotions 

mr harlowe talks of dining out to-day i think at my brother
antony's 

mr harlowe not my father have i not then a father thought i 

sit down when i bid you 

i sat down 

you look very sullen clary 

i hope not madam 

if children would always be children parents and there she stopt 

she then went to her toilette and looked into the glass and gave half
a sigh the other half as if she would not have sighed if she could
have helped it she gently hem'd away 

i don't love to see the girl look so sullen 

indeed madam i am not sullen and i arose and turning from her 
drew out my handkerchief for the tears ran down my cheeks 

i thought by the glass before me i saw the mother in her softened eye
cast towards me but her words confirmed not the hoped-for tenderness 

one of the most provoking things in this world is to have people cry
for what they can help 

i wish to heaven i could madam and i sobbed again 

tears of penitence and sobs of perverseness are mighty well suited you
may go up to your chamber i shall talk with you by-and-by 

i courtesied with reverence 

mock me not with outward gestures of respect the heart clary is what
i want 

indeed madam you have it it is not so much mine as my mamma's 

fine talking as somebody says if words were to pass for duty 
clarissa harlowe would be the dutifulest child breathing 

god bless that somebody be it whom it will god bless that
somebody and i courtesied and pursuant to her last command was
going 

she seemed struck but was to be angry with me 

so turning from me she spoke with quickness whither now clary
harlowe 

you commanded me madam to go to my chamber 

i see you are very ready to go out of my presence is your compliance
the effect of sullenness or obedience you are very ready to leave me 

i could hold no longer but threw myself at her feet o my dearest
mamma let me know all i am to suffer let me know what i am to be i
will bear it if i can bear it but your displeasure i cannot bear 

leave me leave me clary harlowe no kneeling limbs so supple will
so stubborn rise i tell you 

i cannot rise i will disobey my mamma when she bids me leave her
without being reconciled to me no sullens my mamma no perverseness 
but worse than either this is direct disobedience yet tear not
yourself from me  wrapping my arms about her as i kneeled she
struggling to get from me my face lifted up to hers with eyes
running over that spoke not my heart if they were not all humility and
reverence  you must not must not tear yourself from me  for still
the dear lady struggled and looked this way and that all in a sweet
disorder as if she knew not what to do  i will neither rise nor
leave you nor let you go till you say you are not angry with me 

o thou ever-moving child of my heart  folding her dear arms about my
neck as mine embraced her knees  why was this task but leave me you
have discomposed me beyond expression leave me my dear i won't be
angry with you if i can help it if you'll be good 

i arose trembling and hardly knowing what i did or how i stood or
walked withdrew to my chamber my hannah followed me as soon as she
heard me quit my mother's presence and with salts and spring-water just
kept me from fainting and that was as much as she could do it was near
two hours before i could so far recover myself as to take up my pen to
write to you how unhappily my hopes have ended 

my mother went down to breakfast i was not fit to appear but if i
had been better i suppose i should not have been sent for since the
permission for my attending her down was given by my father when in
my chamber only on condition that she found me worthy of the name of
daughter that i doubt i shall never be in his opinion if he be not
brought to change his mind as to this mr solmes 




letter xix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe  in answer to letter xv   sat march
4 12 o'clock 


hannah has just now brought me from the usual place your favour of
yesterday the contents of it have made me very thoughtful and you
will have an answer in my gravest style i to have that mr solmes no
indeed i will sooner but i will write first to those passages in your
letter which are less concerning that i may touch upon this part with
more patience 

as to what you mention of my sister's value for mr lovelace i am not
very much surprised at it she takes such officious pains and it is so
much her subject to have it thought that she never did and never could
like him that she gives but too much room to suspect that she does she
never tells the story of their parting and of her refusal of him but
her colour rises she looks with disdain upon me and mingles anger with
the airs she gives herself anger as well as airs demonstrating that
she refused a man whom she thought worth accepting where else is the
reason either for anger or boast poor bella she is to be pitied she
cannot either like or dislike with temper would to heaven she had been
mistress of all her wishes would to heaven she had 

as to what you say of my giving up to my father's controul the estate
devised me my motives at the time as you acknowledge were not
blamable your advice to me on the subject was grounded as i remember 
on your good opinion of me believing that i should not make a bad use
of the power willed me neither you nor i my dear although you now
assume the air of a diviner  pardon me  could have believed that would
have happened which has happened as to my father's part particularly 
you were indeed jealous of my brother's views against me or rather of
his predominant love of himself but i did not think so hardly of my
brother and sister as you always did you never loved them and ill-will
has eyes ever open to the faulty side as good-will or love is blind
even to real imperfections i will briefly recollect my motives 

i found jealousies and uneasiness rising in every breast where all
before was unity and love the honoured testator was reflected upon a
second childhood was attributed to him and i was censured as having
taken advantage of it all young creatures thought i more or less 
covet independency but those who wish most for it are seldom the
fittest to be trusted either with the government of themselves or with
power over others this is certainly a very high and unusual devise to
so young a creature we should not aim at all we have power to do to
take all that good-nature or indulgence or good opinion confers 
shews a want of moderation and a graspingness that is unworthy of that
indulgence and are bad indications of the use that may be made of the
power bequeathed it is true thought i that i have formed agreeable
schemes of making others as happy as myself by the proper discharge of
the stewardship intrusted to me  are not all estates stewardships 
my dear   but let me examine myself is not vanity or secret love
of praise a principal motive with me at the bottom ought i not to
suspect my own heart if i set up for myself puffed up with every one's
good opinion may i not be left to myself every one's eyes are upon
the conduct upon the visits upon the visiters of a young creature
of our sex made independent and are not such subjected more than any
others to the attempts of enterprisers and fortune-seekers and then 
left to myself should i take a wrong step though with ever so good an
intention how many should i have to triumph over me how few to pity
me the more of the one and the fewer of the other for having aimed
at excelling 

these were some of my reflections at the time and i have no doubt but
that in the same situation i should do the very same thing and that
upon the maturest deliberation who can command or foresee events to
act up to our best judgments at the time is all we can do if i have
erred tis to worldly wisdom only that i have erred if we suffer by an
act of duty or even by an act of generosity is it not pleasurable on
reflection that the fault is in others rather than in ourselves i
had much rather have reason to think others unkind than that they
should have any to think me undutiful 

and so my dear i am sure had you 

and now for the most concerning part of your letter 

you think i must of necessity as matters are circumstanced be solmes's
wife i will not be very rash my dear in protesting to the contrary 
but i think it never can and what is still more never ought to
be my temper i know is depended upon but i have heretofore said 
that i have something in me of my father's family as well as of my
mother's and have i any encouragement to follow too implicitly the
example which my mother sets of meekness and resignedness to the wills
of others is she not for ever obliged as she was pleased to hint to
me to be of the forbearing side in my mother's case your observation
i must own is verified that those who will bear much shall have much
to bear what is it as she says that she has not sacrificed to
peace yet has she by her sacrifices always found the peace she has
deserved to find indeed no i am afraid the very contrary and often
and often have i had reason on her account to reflect that we poor
mortals by our over-solicitude to preserve undisturbed the qualities we
are constitutionally fond of frequently lose the benefits we propose
to ourselves from them since the designing and encroaching finding out
what we most fear to forfeit direct their batteries against these our
weaker places and making an artillery if i may so phrase it of our
hopes and fears play upon us at their pleasure 


 see letter ix 

 see letter x 


steadiness of mind a quality which the ill-bred and censorious deny to
any of our sex when we are absolutely convinced of being in the right
 otherwise it is not steadiness but obstinacy  and when it is exerted
in material cases is a quality which as my good dr lewen was wont to
say brings great credit to the possessor of it at the same time that
it usually when tried and known raises such above the attempts of
the meanly machinating he used therefore to inculcate upon me this
steadiness upon laudable convictions and why may i not think that i am
now put upon a proper exercise of it 

i said above that i never can be that i never ought to be mrs 
solmes i repeat that i ought not for surely my dear i should not
give up to my brother's ambition the happiness of my future life surely
i ought not to be the instrument of depriving mr solmes's relations of
their natural rights and reversionary prospects for the sake of further
aggrandizing a family although that i am of which already lives
in great affluence and splendour and which might be as justly
dissatisfied were all that some of it aim at to be obtained that they
were not princes as now they are that they are not peers  for when ever
was an ambitious mind as you observe in the case of avarice satisfied
by acquisition   the less surely ought i to give into these grasping
views of my brother as i myself heartily despise the end aimed at as
i wish not either to change my state or better my fortunes and as i
am fully persuaded that happiness and riches are two things and very
seldom meet together 


 see letter x 


yet i dread i exceedingly dread the conflicts i know i must
encounter with it is possible that i may be more unhappy from the due
observation of the good doctor's general precept than were i to
yield the point since what i call steadiness is deemed stubbornness 
obstinacy prepossession by those who have a right to put what
interpretation they please upon my conduct 

so my dear were we perfect which no one can be we could not be
happy in this life unless those with whom we have to deal those more
especially who have any controul upon us were governed by the same
principles but then does not the good doctor's conclusion recur that
we have nothing to do but to chuse what is right to be steady in the
pursuit of it and to leave the issue to providence 

this if you approve of my motives and if you don't pray inform me 
must be my aim in the present case 

but what then can i plead for a palliation to myself of my mother's
sufferings on my account perhaps this consideration will carry some
force with it that her difficulties cannot last long only till
this great struggle shall be one way or other determined whereas my
unhappiness if i comply will from an aversion not to be overcome be
for life to which let me add that as i have reason to think that the
present measures are not entered upon with her own natural liking she
will have the less pain should they want the success which i think in
my heart they ought to want 

i have run a great length in a very little time the subject touched me
to the quick my reflections upon it will give you reason to expect from
me a perhaps too steady behaviour in a new conference which i find i
must have with my mother my father and brother as she was pleased
to tell me dine at my uncle antony's and that as i have reason to
believe on purpose to give an opportunity for it 

hannah informs me that she heard my father high and angry with my
mother at taking leave of her i suppose for being to favourable to me 
for hannah heard her say as in tears indeed mr harlowe you greatly
distress me the poor girl does not deserve  hannah heard no more 
but that he said he would break somebody's heart mine i suppose not
my mother's i hope 

as only my sister dines with my mother i thought i should have been
commanded down but she sent me up a plate from her table i continued
my writing i could not touch a morsel i ordered hannah however to eat
of it that i might not be thought sullen 

before i conclude this i will see whether any thing offers from either
of my private correspondencies that will make it proper to add to it 
and will take a turn in the wood-yard and garden for that purpose 


 


i am stopped hannah shall deposit this she was ordered by my mother
 who asked where i was to tell me that she would come up and talk with
me in my own closet she is coming adieu my dear 




letter xx

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sat afternoon 


the expected conference is over but my difficulties are increased 
this as my mother was pleased to tell me being the last persuasory
effort that is to be attempted i will be particular in the account of
it as my head and my heart will allow it to be 

i have made said she as she entered my room a short as well as early
dinner on purpose to confer with you and i do assure you that it will
be the last conference i shall either be permitted or inclined to hold
with you on the subject if you should prove as refractory as it is
imagined you will prove by some who are of opinion that i have not
the weight with you which my indulgence deserves but i hope you will
convince as well them as me of the contrary 

your father both dines and sups at your uncle's on purpose to give
us this opportunity and according to the report i shall make on his
return which i have promised shall be a very faithful one he will
take his measures with you 

i was offering to speak hear clarissa what i have to tell you said
she before you speak unless what you have to say will signify to me
your compliance say will it if it will you may speak 

i was silent 

she looked with concern and anger upon me no compliance i find such
a dutiful young creature hitherto will you not can you not speak as
i would have you speak then  rejecting me as it were with her hand 
continue silent i no more than your father will bear your avowed
contradiction 

she paused with a look of expectation as if she waited for my
consenting answer 

i was still silent looking down the tears in my eyes 

o thou determined girl but say speak out are you resolved to stand
in opposition to us all in a point our hearts are set upon 

may i madam be permitted to expostulate 

to what purpose expostulate with me clarissa your father is
determined have i not told you there is no receding that the honour as
well as the interest of the family is concerned be ingenuous you used
to be so even occasionally against yourself who at the long run must
submit all of us to you or you to all of us if you intend to yield
at last if you find you cannot conquer yield now and with a grace for
yield you must or be none of our child 

i wept i knew not what to say or rather how to express what i had to
say 

take notice that there are flaws in your grandfather's will not
a shilling of that estate will be yours if you do not yield your
grandfather left it to you as a reward of your duty to him and to
us you will justly forfeit it if 

permit me good madam to say that if it were unjustly bequeathed me 
i ought not to wish to have it but i hope mr solmes will be apprised
of these flaws 

this is very pertly said clarissa but reflect that the forfeiture of
that estate through your opposition will be attended with the total
loss of your father's favour and then how destitute must you be how
unable to support yourself and how many benevolent designs and good
actions must you give up 

i must accommodate myself madam in the latter case to my
circumstance much only is required where much is given it becomes me
to be thankful for what i have had i have reason to bless you madam 
and my good mrs norton for bringing me up to be satisfied with little 
with much less i will venture to say than my father's indulgence
annually confers upon me and then i thought of the old roman and his
lentils 

what perverseness said my mother but if you depend upon the favour of
either or both of your uncles vain will be that dependence they
will give you up i do assure you if your father does and absolutely
renounce you 

i am sorry madam that i have had so little merit as to have made no
deeper impressions of favour for me in their hearts but i will love and
honour them as long as i live 

all this clarissa makes your prepossession in a certain man's favour
the more evident indeed your brother and sister cannot go any where 
but they hear of these prepossessions 

it is a great grief to me madam to be made the subject of the public
talk but i hope you will have the goodness to excuse me for observing 
that the authors of my disgrace within doors the talkers of my
prepossession without and the reporters of it from abroad are
originally the same persons 

she severely chid me for this 

i received her rebukes in silence 

you are sullen clarissa i see you are sullen and she walked about
the room in anger then turning to me you can bear the imputation of
sullenness i see you have no concern to clear yourself of it i was
afraid of telling you all i was enjoined to tell you in case you were
to be unpersuadable but i find that i had a greater opinion of
your delicacy of your gentleness than i needed to have it cannot
discompose so steady so inflexible a young creature to be told as i
now tell you that the settlements are actually drawn and that you will
be called down in a very few days to hear them read and to sign them 
for it is impossible if your heart be free that you can make the least
objection to them except it will be an objection with you that they
are so much in your favour and in the favour of all our family 

i was speechless absolutely speechless although my heart was ready to
burst yet could i neither weep nor speak 

i am sorry said she for your averseness to this match  match she was
pleased to call it   but there is no help the honour and interest
of the family as your aunt has told you and as i have told you are
concerned and you must comply 

i was still speechless 

she folded the warm statue as she was pleased to call me in her arms 
and entreated me for heaven's sake to comply 

speech and tears were lent me at the same time you have given me life 
madam said i clasping my uplifted hands together and falling on one
knee a happy one till now has your goodness and my papa's made it 
o do not do not make all the remainder of it miserable 

your father replied she is resolved not to see you till he sees you
as obedient a child as you used to be you have never been put to a test
till now that deserved to be called a test this is this must be 
my last effort with you give me hope my dear child my peace is
concerned i will compound with you but for hope and yet your
father will not be satisfied without an implicit and even a cheerful
obedience give me but hope child 

to give you hope my dearest my most indulgent mamma is to give you
every thing can i be honest if i give a hope that i cannot confirm 

she was very angry she again called me perverse she upbraided me with
regarding only my own prepossessions and respecting not either her
peace of mind or my own duty it is a grating thing said she for the
parents of a child who delighted in her in all the time of her helpless
infancy and throughout every stage of her childhood and in every
part of her education to womanhood because of the promises she gave of
proving the most grateful and dutiful of children to find just when
the time arrived which should crown their wishes that child stand in
the way of her own happiness and her parents' comfort and refusing an
excellent offer and noble settlements give suspicions to her anxious
friends that she would become the property of a vile rake and
libertine who be the occasion what it will defies her family and has
actually embrued his hands in her brother's blood 

i have had a very hard time of it said she between your father and
you for seeing your dislike i have more than once pleaded for you 
but all to no purpose i am only treated as a too fond mother who 
from motives of a blamable indulgence encourage a child to stand in
opposition to a father's will i am charged with dividing the family
into two parts i and my youngest daughter standing against my husband 
his two brothers my son my eldest daughter and my sister hervey 
i have been told that i must be convinced of the fitness as well
as advantage to the whole your brother and mr lovelace out of the
question of carrying the contract with mr solmes on which so many
contracts depend into execution 

your father's heart i tell you once more is in it he has declared 
that he had rather have no daughter in you than one he cannot dispose
of for your own good especially if you have owned that your heart is
free and as the general good of his whole family is to be promoted
by your obedience he has pleaded poor man that his frequent gouty
paroxysms every fit more threatening than the former give him no
extraordinary prospects either of worldly happiness or of long days 
and he hopes that you who have been supposed to have contributed
to the lengthening of your grandfather's life will not by your
disobedience shorten your father's 

this was a most affecting plea my dear i wept in silence upon it i
could not speak to it and my mother proceeded what therefore can be
his motives clary harlowe in the earnest desire he has to see this
treaty perfected but the welfare and aggrandizement of his family 
which already having fortunes to become the highest condition cannot
but aspire to greater distinctions however slight such views as these
may appear to you clary you know that they are not slight ones to any
other of the family and your father will be his own judge of what
is and what is not likely to promote the good of his children your
abstractedness child affectation of abstractedness some call it 
savours let me tell you of greater particularity than we aim to
carry modesty and humility therefore will oblige you rather to
mistrust yourself of peculiarity than censure views which all the world
pursues as opportunity offers 

i was still silent and she proceeded it is owing to the good opinion 
clary which your father has of you and of your prudence duty and
gratitude that he engaged for your compliance in your absence before
you returned from miss howe and that he built and finished contracts
upon it which cannot be made void or cancelled 

but why then thought i did they receive me on my return from miss
howe with so much intimidating solemnity to be sure my dear this
argument as well as the rest was obtruded upon my mother 

she went on your father has declared that your unexpected opposition 
 unexpected she was pleased to call it   and mr lovelace's continued
menaces and insults more and more convince him that a short day is
necessary in order to put an end to all that man's hopes and to his own
apprehensions resulting from the disobedience of a child so favoured he
has therefore actually ordered patterns of the richest silks to be sent
for from london 

i started i was out of breath i gasped at this frightful
precipitance i was going to open with warmth against it i knew whose
the happy expedient must be female minds i once heard my brother say 
that could but be brought to balance on the change of their state 
might easily be determined by the glare and splendour of the nuptial
preparations and the pride of becoming the mistress of a family but
she was pleased to hurry on that i might not have time to express
my disgusts at such a communication to this effect your father
therefore my clary cannot either for your sake or his own labour
under a suspense so affecting to his repose he has even thought fit to
acquaint me on my pleading for you that it becomes me as i value my
own peace  how harsh to such a wife   and as i wish that he does not
suspect that i secretly favour the address of a vile rake a character
which all the sex he is pleased to say virtuous and vicious are but
too fond of to exert my authority over you and that this i may the
less scrupulously do as you have owned  the old string   that your
heart is free 

unworthy reflection in my mother's case surely this of our sex's
valuing a libertine since she made choice of my father in preference
to several suitors of equal fortune because they were of inferior
reputation for morals 

your father added she at his going out told me what he expected
from me in case i found out that i had not the requisite influence upon
you it was this that i should directly separate myself from you and
leave you singly to take the consequence of your double disobedience i
therefore entreat you my dear clarissa concluded she and that in the
most earnest and condescending manner to signify to your father on his
return your ready obedience and this as well for my sake as your own 

affected by my mother's goodness to me and by that part of her argument
which related to her own peace and to the suspicions they had of her
secretly inclining to prefer the man so hated by them to the man so
much my aversion i could not but wish it were possible for me to obey 
i therefore paused hesitated considered and was silent for some time 
i could see that my mother hoped that the result of this hesitation
would be favourable to her arguments but then recollecting that all
was owing to the instigations of a brother and sister wholly actuated
by selfish and envious views that i had not deserved the treatment i
had of late met with that my disgrace was already become the public
talk that the man was mr solmes and that my aversion to him was too
generally known to make my compliance either creditable to myself or
to them that it would give my brother and sister a triumph over me 
and over mr lovelace which they would not fail to glory in and which 
although it concerned me but little to regard on his account yet might
be attended with fatal mischiefs and then mr solmes's
disagreeable person his still more disagreeable manners his low
understanding understanding the glory of a man so little to be
dispensed with in the head and director of a family in order to
preserve to him that respect which a good wife and that for the
justification of her own choice should pay him herself and wish every
body to pay him and as mr solmes's inferiority in this respectable
faculty of the human mind  i must be allowed to say this to you and no
great self assumption neither  would proclaim to all future as well as
to all present observers what must have been my mean inducement all
these reflections crowding upon my remembrance i would madam said
i folding my hands with an earnestness in which my whole heart was
engaged bear the cruelest tortures bear loss of limb and even of
life to give you peace but this man every moment i would at you
command think of him with favour is the more my aversion you cannot 
indeed you cannot think how my whole soul resists him and to talk
of contracts concluded upon of patterns of a short day save me 
save me o my dearest mamma save your child from this heavy from this
insupportable evil 

never was there a countenance that expressed so significantly as my
mother's did an anguish which she struggled to hide under an anger
she was compelled to assume till the latter overcoming the former she
turned from me with an uplifted eye and stamping strange perverseness 
were the only words i heard of a sentence that she angrily pronounced 
and was going i then half-frantically i believe laid hold of her
gown have patience with me dearest madam said i do not you renounce
me totally if you must separate yourself from your child let it
not be with absolute reprobation on your own part my uncles may be
hard-hearted my father may be immovable i may suffer from my brother's
ambition and from my sister's envy but let me not lose my mamma's
love at least her pity 

she turned to me with benigner rays you have my love you have my pity 
but o my dearest girl i have not yours 

indeed indeed madam you have and all my reverence all my gratitude 
you have but in this one point cannot i be this once obliged will
no expedient be accepted have i not made a very fair proposal as to mr 
lovelace 

i wish for both our sakes my dear unpersuadable girl that the
decision of this point lay with me but why when you know it does not 
why should you thus perplex and urge me to renounce mr lovelace is
now but half what is aimed at nor will any body else believe you in
earnest in the offer if i would while you remain single mr lovelace
will have hopes and you in the opinion of others inclinations 

permit me dearest madam to say that your goodness to me your
patience your peace weigh more with me than all the rest put
together for although i am to be treated by my brother and through
his instigations by my father as a slave in this point and not as a
daughter yet my mind is not that of a slave you have not brought me up
to be mean 

so clary you are already at defiance with your father i have had too
much cause before to apprehend as much what will this come to i and
then my dear mamma sighed i am forced to put up with many humours 

that you are my ever-honoured mamma is my grief and can it be
thought that this very consideration and the apprehension of what may
result from a much worse-tempered man a man who has not half the sense
of my father has not made an impression upon me to the disadvantage
of the married life yet tis something of an alleviation if one must
bear undue controul to bear it from a man of sense my father i
have heard you say madam was for years a very good-humoured
gentleman unobjectionable in person and manners but the man proposed
to me 

forbear reflecting upon your father  did i my dear in what i have
repeated and i think they are the very words reflect upon my father  
it is not possible i must say again and again were all men equally
indifferent to you that you should be thus sturdy in your will i am
tired out with your obstinacy the most unpersuadable girl you forget 
that i must separate myself from you if you will not comply you do not
remember that you father will take you up where i leave you once
more however i will put it to you are you determined to brave your
father's displeasure are you determined to defy your uncles do you
choose to break with us all rather than encourage mr solmes rather
than give me hope 

dreadful alternative but is not my sincerity is not the integrity of
my heart concerned in the answer may not my everlasting happiness
be the sacrifice will not the least shadow of the hope you just now
demanded from me be driven into absolute and sudden certainty is it
not sought to ensnare to entangle me in my own desire of obeying if
i could give answers that might be construed into hope forgive
me madam bear with your child's boldness in such a cause as
this settlements drawn patterns sent for an early day dear dear
madam how can i give hope and not intend to be this man's 

ah girl never say your heart is free you deceive yourself if you
think it is 

thus to be driven  and i wrung my hands through impatience  by the
instigations of a designing an ambitious brother and by a sister 
that 

how often clary must i forbid your unsisterly reflections does not
your father do not your uncles does not every body patronize
mr solmes and let me tell you ungrateful girl and unmovable as
ungrateful let me repeatedly tell you that it is evident to me that
nothing but a love unworthy of your prudence can make you a creature
late so dutiful now so sturdy you may guess what your father's first
question on his return will be he must know that i can do nothing with
you i have done my part seek me if your mind change before he comes
back you have yet a little more time as he stays supper i will no
more seek you nor to you and away she flung 

what could i do but weep 

i am extremely affected on my mother's account more i must needs say 
than on my own and indeed all things considered and especially that
the measure she is engaged in is as i dare say it is against her own
judgment she deserves more compassion than myself excellent woman 
what pity that meekness and condescension should not be attended with
the due rewards of those charming graces yet had she not let violent
spirits as i have elsewhere observed with no small regret find their
power over hers it could not have been thus 

but here run away with my pen i suffer my mother to be angry with me
on her own account she hinted to me indeed that i must seek her if
my mind changed which is a condition that amounts to a prohibition of
attending her but as she left me in displeasure will it not have a
very obstinate appearance and look like a kind of renunciation of her
mediation in my favour if i go not down before my father returns to
supplicate her pity and her kind report to him 

i will attend her i had rather all the world should be angry with me
than my mamma 

mean time to clear my hands from papers of such a nature hannah shall
deposit this if two or three letters reach you together they will but
express from one period to another the anxieties and difficulties which
the mind of your unhappy but ever affectionate friend labours under 

cl h 




letter xxi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sat night 


i have been down i am to be unlucky in all i do i think be my
intentions ever so good i have made matters worse instead of better as
i shall now tell you 

i found my mother and sister together in my sister's parlour my mother 
i fear by the glow of her fine face and as the browner sullener glow
in her sister's confirmed had been expressing herself with warmth 
against her unhappier child perhaps giving such an account of what had
passed as should clear herself and convince bella and through her 
my brother and uncles of the sincere pains she had taken with me 

i entered like a dejected criminal and besought the favour of a private
audience my mother's return both looks and words gave but too much
reason for my above surmise 

you have said she  looking at me with a sternness that never sits well
on her sweet features  rather a requesting than a conceding countenance 
clarissa harlowe if i am mistaken tell me so and i will withdraw with
you wherever you will yet whether so or not you may say what you
have to say before your sister 

my mother i thought might have withdrawn with me as she knows that i
have not a friend in my sister 

i come down madam said i to beg of you to forgive me for any thing
you may have taken amiss in what passed above respecting your honoured
self and that you will be pleased to use your endeavours to soften my
papa's displeasure against me on his return 

such aggravating looks such lifting up of hands and eyes such a
furrowed forehead in my sister 

my mother was angry enough without all that and asked me to what
purpose i came down if i were still so intractable 

she had hardly spoken the words when shorey came in to tell her that
mr solmes was in the hall and desired admittance 

ugly creature what at the close of day quite dark brought him
hither but on second thoughts i believe it was contrived that he
should be here at supper to know the result of the conference between
my mother and me and that my father on his return might find us
together 

i was hurrying away but my mother commanded me since i had come down
only as she said to mock her not to stir and at the same time see
if i could behave so to mr solmes as might encourage her to make the
favourable report to my father which i had besought her to make 

my sister triumphed i was vexed to be so caught and to have such an
angry and cutting rebuke given me with an aspect much more like the
taunting sister than the indulgent mother if i may presume to say so 
for she herself seemed to enjoy the surprise upon me 

the man stalked in his usual walk is by pauses as if from the same
vacuity of thought which made dryden's clown whistle he was telling
his steps and first paid his clumsy respects to my mother then to my
sister next to me as if i was already his wife and therefore to be
last in his notice and sitting down by me told us in general what
weather it was very cold he made it but i was warm enough then
addressing himself to me and how do you find it miss was his
question and would have taken my hand 

i withdrew it i believe with disdain enough my mother frowned my
sister bit her lip 

i could not contain myself i was never so bold in my life for i went
on with my plea as if mr solmes had not been there 

my mother coloured and looked at him at my sister and at me my
sister's eyes were opener and bigger than ever i saw them before 

the man understood me he hemmed and removed from one chair to another 

i went on supplicating for my mother's favourable report nothing but
invincible dislike said i 

what would the girl be at interrupted my mother why clary is this a
subject is this is this is this a time and again she looked upon
mr solmes 

i am sorry on reflection that i put my mamma into so much
confusion to be sure it was very saucy in me 

i beg pardon madam said i but my papa will soon return and since
i am not permitted to withdraw it is not necessary i humbly presume 
that mr solmes's presence should deprive me of this opportunity to
implore your favourable report and at the same time if he still visit
on my account  looking at him  to convince him that it cannot possibly
be to any purpose 

is the girl mad said my mother interrupting me 

my sister with the affectation of a whisper to my mother this is this
is spite madam  very spitefully she spoke the word   because you
commanded her to stay 

i only looked at her and turning to my mother permit me madam said
i to repeat my request i have no brother no sister if i ever lose
my mamma's favour i am lost for ever 

mr solmes removed to his first seat and fell to gnawing the head of
his hazel a carved head almost as ugly as his own i did not think the
man was so sensible 

my sister rose with a face all over scarlet and stepping to the table 
where lay a fan she took it up and although mr solmes had observed
that the weather was cold fanned herself very violently 

my mother came to me and angrily taking my hand led me out of that
parlour into my own which you know is next to it is not this
behaviour very bold very provoking think you clary 

i beg your pardon madam if it has that appearance to you but indeed 
my dear mamma there seem to be snares laying in wait for me too well
i know my brother's drift with a good word he shall have my consent for
all he wishes to worm me out of neither he nor my sister shall need
to take half this pains 

my mother was about to leave me in high displeasure 

i besought her to stay one favour but one favour dearest madam said
i give me leave to beg of you 

what would the girl 

i see how every thing is working about i never never can think of mr 
solmes my papa will be in tumults when he is told that i cannot they
will judge of the tenderness of your heart to a poor child who seems
devoted by every one else from the willingness you have already shewn
to hearken to my prayers there will be endeavours used to confine me 
and keep me out of your presence and out of the presence of every one
who used to love me  this my dear miss howe is threatened  if this
be effected if it be put out of my power to plead my own cause and to
appeal to you and to my uncle harlowe of whom only i have hope then
will every ear be opened against me and every tale encouraged it
is therefore my humble request that added to the disgraceful
prohibitions i now suffer under you will not if you can help it give
way to my being denied your ear 

your listening hannah has given you this intelligence as she does many
others 

my hannah madam listens not my hannah 

no more in hannah's behalf hannah is known to make mischief hannah
is known but no more of that bold intermeddler tis true your father
threatened to confine you to your chamber if you complied not in order
the more assuredly to deprive you of the opportunity of corresponding
with those who harden your heart against his will he bid me tell you
so when he went out if i found you refractory but i was loth to
deliver so harsh a declaration being still in hope that you would come
down to us in a compliant temper hannah has overheard this i suppose 
and has told you of it as also that he declared he would break your
heart rather than you should break his and i now assure you that you
will be confined and prohibited making teasing appeals to any of us 
and we shall see who is to submit you to us or every body to you 

again i offered to clear hannah and to lay the latter part of the
intelligence to my sister's echo betty barnes who had boasted of it to
another servant but i was again bid to be silent on that head i
should soon find my mother was pleased to say that others could be as
determined as i was obstinate and once for all would add that since
she saw that i built upon her indulgence and was indifferent about
involving her in contentions with my father she would now assure me 
that she was as much determined against mr lovelace and for mr solmes
and the family schemes as any body and would not refuse her consent to
any measures that should be thought necessary to reduce a stubborn child
to her duty 

i was ready to sink she was so good as to lend me her arm to support
me 

and this said i is all i have to hope for from my mamma 

it is but clary this one further opportunity i give you go in again
to mr solmes and behave discreetly to him and let your father find
you together upon civil terms at least 

my feet moved  of themselves i think  farther from the parlour where he
was and towards the stairs and there i stopped and paused 

if proceeded she you are determined to stand in defiance of us
all then indeed you may go up to your chamber as you are ready to
do and god help you 

god help me indeed for i cannot give hope of what i cannot intend but
let me have your prayers my dear mamma those shall have mine who
have brought me into all this distress 

i was moving to go up 

and will you go up clary 

i turned my face to her my officious tears would needs plead for me i
could not just then speak and stood still 

good girl distress me not thus dear good girl do not thus distress
me holding out her hand but standing still likewise 

what can i do madam what can i do 

go in again my child go in again my dear child repeated she and
let your father find you together 

what madam to give him hope to give hope to mr solmes 

obstinate perverse undutiful clarissa with a rejecting hand and
angry aspect then take your own way and go up but stir not down
again i charge you without leave or till your father's pleasure be
known concerning you 

she flung away from me with high indignation and i went up with a very
heavy heart and feet as slow as my heart was heavy 


 


my father is come home and my brother with him late as it is they are
all shut up together not a door opens not a soul stirs hannah as she
moves up and down is shunned as a person infected 


 


the angry assembly is broken up my two uncles and my aunt hervey are
sent for it seems to be here in the morning to breakfast i shall
then i suppose know my doom tis past eleven and i am ordered not to
go to bed 


twelve o'clock 


this moment the keys of every thing are taken from me it was proposed
to send for me down but my father said he could not bear to look upon
me strange alteration in a few weeks shorey was the messenger the
tears stood in her eyes when she delivered her message 

you my dear are happy may you always be so and then i can never be
wholly miserable adieu my beloved friend 

cl harlowe 




letter xxii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sunday morning march 5 


hannah has just brought me from the private place in the garden-wall a
letter from mr lovelace deposited last night signed also by lord m 

he tells me in it that mr solmes makes it his boast that he is to
be married in a few days to one of the shyest women in england that my
brother explains his meaning this shy creature he says is me and
he assures every one that his younger sister is very soon to be mr 
solmes's wife he tells me of the patterns bespoken which my mother
mentioned to me 

not one thing escapes him that is done or said in this house 

my sister he says reports the same things and that with such
particular aggravations of insult upon him that he cannot but be
extremely piqued as well at the manner as from the occasion and
expresses himself with great violence upon it 

he knows not he says what my relations' inducements can be to prefer
such a man as solmes to him if advantageous settlements be the motive 
solmes shall not offer what he will refuse to comply with 

as to his estate and family the first cannot be excepted against and
for the second he will not disgrace himself by a comparison so odious 
he appeals to lord m for the regularity of his life and manners ever
since he has made his addresses to me or had hope of my favour 

i suppose he would have his lordship's signing to this letter to be
taken as a voucher for him 

he desires my leave in company with my lord in a pacific manner 
to attend my father and uncles in order to make proposals that must be
accepted if they will see him and hear what they are and tells me 
that he will submit to any measures that i shall prescribe in order to
bring about a reconciliation 

he presumes to be very earnest with me to give him a private meeting
some night in my father's garden attended by whom i please 

really my dear were you to see his letter you would think i had given
him great encouragement and that i am in direct treaty with him or
that he is sure that my friends will drive me into a foreign protection 
for he has the boldness to offer in my lord's name an asylum to me 
should i be tyrannically treated in solmes's behalf 

i suppose it is the way of this sex to endeavour to entangle the
thoughtless of ours by bold supposals and offers in hopes that we shall
be too complaisant or bashful to quarrel with them and if not checked 
to reckon upon our silence as assents voluntarily given or concessions
made in their favour 

there are other particulars in this letter which i ought to mention to
you but i will take an opportunity to send you the letter itself or a
copy of it 

for my own part i am very uneasy to think how i have been drawn on one
hand and driven on the other into a clandestine in short into a mere
loverlike correspondence which my heart condemns 

it is easy to see if i do not break it off that mr lovelace's
advantages by reason of my unhappy situation will every day increase 
and i shall be more and more entangled yet if i do put an end to
it without making it a condition of being freed from mr solmes's
address may i my dear is it best to continue it a little longer in
order to extricate myself out of the other difficulty by giving up all
thoughts of mr lovelace whose advice can i now ask but yours 

all my relations are met they are at breakfast together mr solmes is
expected i am excessively uneasy i must lay down my pen 


 


they are all going to church together grievously disordered they appear
to be as hannah tells me she believes something is resolved upon 


sunday noon 


what a cruel thing is suspense i will ask leave to go to church this
afternoon i expect to be denied but if i do not ask they may allege 
that my not going is owing to myself 


 


i desired to speak with shorey shorey came i directed her to carry to
my mother my request for permission to go to church this afternoon what
think you was the return tell her that she must direct herself to
her brother for any favour she has to ask so my dear i am to be
delivered up to my brother 

i was resolved however to ask of him this favour accordingly when
they sent me up my solitary dinner i gave the messenger a billet 
in which i made it my humble request through him to my father to be
permitted to go to church this afternoon 

this was the contemptuous answer tell her that her request will be
taken into consideration to-morrow 

patience will be the fittest return i can make to such an insult but
this method will not do with me indeed it will not and yet it is but
the beginning i suppose of what i am to expect from my brother now i
am delivered up to him 



on recollection i thought it best to renew my request i did the
following is a copy of what i wrote and what follows that of the
answer sent me 


sir 

i know not what to make of the answer brought to my request of being
permitted to go to church this afternoon if you designed to shew your
pleasantry by it i hope that will continue and then my request will be
granted 

you know that i never absented myself when well and at home till the
two last sundays when i was advised not to go my present situation is
such that i never more wanted the benefit of the public prayers 

i will solemnly engage only to go thither and back again 

i hope it cannot be thought that i would do otherwise 

my dejection of spirits will give a too just excuse on the score
of indisposition for avoiding visits nor will i but by distant
civilities return the compliments of any of my acquaintances my
disgraces if they are to have an end need not be proclaimed to the
whole world i ask this favour therefore for my reputation's sake 
that i may be able to hold up my head in the neighbourhood if i live to
see an end of the unmerited severities which seem to be designed for

your unhappy sister cl harlowe 



to miss clarissa harlowe

for a girl to lay so much stress upon going to church and yet resolve
to defy her parents in an article of the greatest consequence to them 
and to the whole family is an absurdity you are recommended miss to
the practice of your private devotions may they be efficacious upon the
mind of one of the most pervicacious young creatures that ever was heard
of the intention is i tell you plainly to mortify you into a sense
of your duty the neighbours you are so solicitous to appear well with 
already know that you defy that so miss if you have a real value for
your reputation shew it as you ought it is yet in your own power to
establish or impair it 

ja harlowe 



thus my dear miss howe has my brother got me into his snares and i 
like a poor silly bird the more i struggle am the more entangled 




letter xxiii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe monday morning march 6 


they are resolved to break my heart my poor hannah is
discharged disgracefully discharged thus it was 

within half an hour after i had sent the poor girl down for my
breakfast that bold creature betty barnes my sister's confidant and
servant if a favourite maid and confidant can be deemed a servant 
came up 

what miss will you please to have for breakfast 

i was surprised what will i have for breakfast 
betty how what how comes it then i named hannah i could not
tell what to say 

don't be surprised miss but you'll see hannah no more in this house 

god forbid is any harm come to hannah what what is the matter with
hannah 

why miss the short and the long is this your papa and mamma think
hannah has staid long enough in the house to do mischief and so she
is ordered to troop  that was the confident creature's word  and i am
directed to wait upon you in her stead 

i burst into tears i have no service for you betty barnes none at
all but where is hannah cannot i speak with the poor girl i owe her
half a year's wages may i not see the honest creature and pay her her
wages i may never see her again perhaps for they are resolved to break
my heart 

and they think you are resolved to break theirs so tit for tat miss 

impertinent i called her and asked her if it were upon such confident
terms that her service was to begin 

i was so very earnest to see the poor maid that to oblige me as she
said she went down with my request 

the worthy creature was as earnest to see me and the favour was granted
in presence of shorey and betty 

i thanked her when she came up for her past service to me 

her heart was ready to break and she began to vindicate her fidelity
and love and disclaimed any mischief she had ever made 

i told her that those who occasioned her being turned out of my
service made no question of her integrity that her dismission was
intended for an indignity to me that i was very sorry to be obliged to
part with her and hoped she would meet with as good a service 

never never wringing her hands should she meet with a mistress
she loved so well and the poor creature ran on in my praises and in
professions of love to me 

we are all apt you know my dear to praise our benefactors because
they are our benefactors as if every body did right or wrong as they
obliged or disobliged us but this good creature deserved to be kindly
treated so i could have no merit in favouring one whom it would have
been ungrateful not to distinguish 

i gave her a little linen some laces and other odd things and instead
of four pounds which were due to her ten guineas and said if ever i
were again allowed to be my own mistress i would think of her in the
first place 

betty enviously whispered shorey upon it 

hannah told me before their faces having no other opportunity that
she had been examined about letters to me and from me and that she
had given her pockets to miss harlowe who looked into them and put her
fingers in her stays to satisfy herself that she had not any 

she gave me an account of the number of my pheasants and bantams and i
said they should be my own care twice or thrice a day 

we wept over each other at parting the girl prayed for all the family 

to have so good a servant so disgracefully dismissed is very cruel and
i could not help saying that these methods might break my heart but not
any other way answer the end of the authors of my disgraces 

betty with a very saucy fleer said to shorey there would be a trial
of skill about that she fancied but i took no notice of it if this
wench thinks that i have robbed her young mistress of a lover as you
say she has given out she may believe that it is some degree of merit
in herself to be impertinent to me 

thus have i been forced to part with my faithful hannah if you can
command the good creature to a place worthy of her pray do for my sake 




letter xxiv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe monday near 12 o'clock 


the enclosed letter was just now delivered to me my brother has carried
all his points 

i send you also the copy of my answer no more at this time can i
write 



monday mar 6 

miss clary 


by command of your father and mother i write expressly to forbid you to
come into their presence or into the garden when they are there nor
when they are not there but with betty banes to attend you except by
particular license or command 

on their blessings you are forbidden likewise to correspond with the
vile lovelace as it is well known you did by means of your sly hannah 
whence her sudden discharge as was fit 

neither are you to correspond with miss howe who has given herself high
airs of late and might possibly help on your correspondence with that
detested libertine nor in short with any body without leave 

you are not to enter into the presence of either of your uncles without
their leave first obtained it is a mercy to you after such a behaviour
to your mother that your father refuses to see you 

you are not to be seen in any apartment of the house you so lately
governed as you pleased unless you are commanded down 

in short you are strictly to confine yourself to your chamber except
now and then in betty barnes's sight as aforesaid you take a morning
or evening turn in the garden and then you are to go directly and
without stopping at any apartment in the way up or down the back
stairs that the sight of so perverse a young creature may not add to
the pain you have given every body 

the hourly threatenings of your fine fellow as well as your own
unheard-of obstinacy will account to you for all this what a hand has
the best and most indulgent of mothers had with you who so long pleaded
for you and undertook for you even when others from the manner of
your setting out despaired of moving you what must your perverseness
have been that such a mother can give you up she thinks it right so to
do nor will take you to favour unless you make the first steps by a
compliance with your duty 

as for myself whom perhaps you think hardly of  in very good company 
if you do that is my sole consolation  i have advised that you may be
permitted to pursue your own inclinations some people need no greater
punishment than such a permission and not to have the house encumbered
by one who must give them the more pain for the necessity she has laid
them under of avoiding the sight of her although in it 

if any thing i have written appear severe or harsh it is still in your
power but perhaps will not always be so to remedy it and that by a
single word 

betty barnes has orders to obey you in all points consistent with her
duty to those whom you owe it as well as she 

ja harlowe 



to james harlowe junior esq 

sir 

i will only say that you may congratulate yourself on having so far
succeeded in all your views that you may report what you please of me 
and i can no more defend myself than if i were dead yet one favour 
nevertheless i will beg of you it is this that you will not occasion
more severities more disgraces that are necessary for carrying into
execution your further designs whatever they be against

your unhappy sister clarissa harlowe 




letter xxv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe tuesday march 7 


by my last deposit you will see how i am driven and what a poor
prisoner i am no regard had to my reputation the whole matter is now
before you can such measures be supposed to soften but surely they
can only mean to try and frighten me into my brother's views all my
hope is to be able to weather this point till my cousin morden comes
from florence and he is soon expected yet if they are determined upon
a short day i doubt he will not be here in time enough to save me 

it is plain by my brother's letter that my mother has not spared me in
the report she was pleased to make of the conference between herself and
me yet she was pleased to hint to me that my brother had views which
she would have had me try to disappoint but indeed she had engaged to
give a faithful account of what was to pass between herself and me and
it was doubtless much more eligible to give up a daughter than to
disoblige a husband and every other person of the family 

they think they have done every thing by turning away my poor hannah 
but as long as the liberty of the garden and my poultry-visits are
allowed me they will be mistaken 

i asked mrs betty if she had any orders to watch or attend me or
whether i was to ask her leave whenever i should be disposed to walk in
the garden or to go feed my bantams lord bless her what could i mean
by such a question yet she owned that she had heard that i was not to
go into the garden when my father mother or uncles were there 

however as it behoved me to be assured on this head i went down
directly and staid an hour without question or impediment and yet a
good part of the time i walked under and in sight as i may say of my
brother's study window where both he and my sister happened to be 
and i am sure they saw me by the loud mirth they affected by way of
insult as i suppose 

so this part of my restraint was doubtless a stretch of the authority
given him the enforcing of that may perhaps come next but i hope not 


tuesday night 


since i wrote the above i ventured to send a letter by shorey to my
mother i desired her to give it into her own hand when nobody was by 

i shall enclose a copy of it you will see that i would have it thought 
that now hannah is gone i have no way to correspond out of the house i
am far from thinking all i do right i am afraid this is a little piece
of art that is not so but this is an afterthought the letter went
first 


honoured madam 

having acknowledged to you that i had received letters from mr 
lovelace full of resentment and that i answered them purely to prevent
further mischief and having shewn you copies of my answers which you
did not disapprove of although you thought fit after you had read
them to forbid me any further correspondence with him i think it my
duty to acquaint you that another letter from him has since come to my
hand in which he is very earnest with me to permit him to wait on my
papa or you or my two uncles in a pacific way accompanied by lord
m on which i beg your commands 

i own to you madam that had not the prohibition been renewed and had
not hannah been so suddenly dismissed my service i should have made
the less scruple to have written an answer and to have commanded her
to convey it to him with all speed in order to dissuade him from these
visits lest any thing should happen on the occasion that my heart aches
but to think of 

and here i cannot but express my grief that i should have all the
punishment and all the blame who as i have reason to think have
prevented great mischief and have not been the occasion of any for 
madam could i be supposed to govern the passions of either of the
gentlemen over the one indeed i have had some little influence 
without giving him hitherto any reason to think he has fastened an
obligation upon me for it over the other who madam has any i am
grieved at heart to be obliged to lay so great a blame at my brother's
door although my reputation and my liberty are both to be sacrificed
to his resentment and ambition may not however so deep a sufferer be
permitted to speak out 

this communication being as voluntarily made as dutifully intended 
i humbly presume to hope that i shall not be required to produce the
letter itself i cannot either in honour or prudence do that because of
the vehemence of his style for having heard  not i assure you by my
means or through hannah's  of some part of the harsh treatment i have
met with he thinks himself entitled to place it to his own account by
reason of speeches thrown out by some of my relations equally vehement 

if i do not answer him he will be made desperate and think himself
justified thought i shall not think him so in resenting the treatment
he complains of if i do and if in compliment to me he forbears to
resent what he thinks himself entitled to resent be pleased madam to
consider the obligation he will suppose he lays me under 

if i were as strongly prepossessed in his favour as is supposed i
should not have wished this to be considered by you and permit me as
a still further proof that i am not prepossessed to beg of you to
consider whether upon the whole the proposal i made of declaring for
the single life which i will religiously adhere to is not the best way
to get rid of his pretensions with honour to renounce him and not be
allowed to aver that i will never be the other man's will make him
conclude driven as i am driven that i am determined in that other
man's favour 

if this has not its due weight my brother's strange schemes must be
tried and i will resign myself to my destiny with all the acquiescence
that shall be granted to my prayers and so leaving the whole to your
own wisdom and whether you choose to consult my papa and uncles upon
this humble application or not or whether i shall be allowed to write
an answer to mr lovelace or not  and if allowed to do so i beg your
direction by whom to send it  i remain 

honoured madam your unhappy but ever dutiful daughter cl harlowe 


wednesday morning 


i have just received an answer to the enclosed letter my mother you
will observe has ordered me to burn it but as you will have it in
your safekeeping and nobody else will see it her end will be equally
answered as if it were burnt it has neither date nor superscription 


clarissa 

say not all the blame and all the punishment is yours i am as much
blamed and as much punished as you are yet am more innocent when
your obstinacy is equal to any other person's passion blame not your
brother we judged right that hannah carried on your correspondencies 
now she is gone and you cannot write  we think you cannot  to miss
howe nor she to you without our knowledge one cause of uneasiness and
jealousy is over 

i had no dislike of hannah i did not tell her so because somebody was
within hearing when she desired to pay her duty to me at going i gave
her a caution in a raised voice to take care wherever she went to
live next if there were any young ladies how she made parties and
assisted in clandestine correspondencies but i slid two guineas into
her hand nor was i angry to hear that you were still more bountiful to
her so much for hannah 

i don't know what to write about your answering that man of violence 
what can you think of it that such a family as ours should have such
a rod held over it for my part i have not owned that i know you have
corresponded by your last boldness to me  an astonishing one it was 
to pursue before mr solmes the subject i was forced to break from
above-stairs   you may as far as i know plead that you had my
countenance for your correspondence with him and so add to the
uneasiness between your father and me you were once my comfort 
clarissa you made all my hardships tolerable but now however 
nothing it is plain can move you and i will say no more on that head 
for you are under your father's discipline now and he will neither be
prescribed to nor entreated 

i should have been glad to see the letter you tell me of as i saw the
rest you say both honour and prudence forbid you to shew it to me o
clarissa what think you of receiving letters that honour and prudence
forbid you to shew to a mother but it is not for me to see it if you
would choose to shew it me i will not be in your secret i will not
know that you did correspond and as to an answer take your own
methods but let him know it will be the last you will write and if
you do write i won't see it so seal it up if you do and give it to
shorey and she yet do not think i give you license to write 

we will be upon no conditions with him nor will you be allowed to be
upon any your father and uncles would have no patience were he to come 
what have you to do to oblige him with your refusal of mr solmes will
not that refusal be to give him hope and while he has any can we be
easy or free from his insults were even your brother in fault as that
fault cannot be conquered is a sister to carry on a correspondence that
shall endanger her brother but your father has given his sanction to
your brother's dislikes your uncles' and every body's no matter to
whom owing 

as to the rest you have by your obstinacy put it out of my power to do
any thing for you your father takes it upon himself to be answerable
for all consequences you must not therefore apply to me for favour 
i shall endeavour to be only an observer happy if i could be an
unconcerned one while i had power you would not let me use it as i
would have used it your aunt has been forced to engage not to interfere
but by your father's direction you'll have severe trials if you have
any favour to hope for it must be from the mediation of your uncles 
and yet i believe they are equally determined for they make it a
principle  alas they never had children   that that child who in
marriage is not governed by her parents is to be given up as a lost
creature 

i charge you let not this letter be found burn it there is too much
of the mother in it to a daughter so unaccountably obstinate 

write not another letter to me i can do nothing for you but you can do
every thing for yourself 


 


now my dear to proceed with my melancholy narrative 

after this letter you will believe that i could have very little
hopes that an application directly to my father would stand me in any
stead but i thought it became me to write were it but to acquit myself
to myself that i have left nothing unattempted that has the least
likelihood to restore me to his favour accordingly i wrote to the
following effect 


i presume not i say to argue with my papa i only beg his mercy and
indulgence in this one point on which depends my present and perhaps
my future happiness and beseech him not to reprobate his child for an
aversion which it is not in her power to conquer i beg that i may not
be sacrificed to projects and remote contingencies i complain of the
disgraces i suffer in this banishment from his presence and in being
confined to my chamber in every thing but this one point i promise
implicit duty and resignation to his will i repeat my offers of a
single life and appeal to him whether i have ever given him cause to
doubt my word i beg to be admitted to his and to my mamma's presence 
and that my conduct may be under their own eye and this with the more
earnestness as i have too much reason to believe that snares are laid
for me and tauntings and revilings used on purpose to make a handle of
my words against me when i am not permitted to speak in my own defence 
i conclude with hoping that my brother's instigations may not rob an
unhappy child of her father 


 


this is the answer sent without superscription and unsealed although
by betty barnes who delivered it with an air as if she knew the
contents 


wednesday 

i write perverse girl but with all the indignation that your
disobedience deserves to desire to be forgiven a fault you own and
yet resolve to persevere in is a boldness no more to be equaled 
than passed over it is my authority you defy your reflections upon a
brother that is an honour to us all deserve my utmost resentment i
see how light all relationship sits upon you the cause i guess at 
too i cannot bear the reflections that naturally arise from this
consideration your behaviour to your too-indulgent and too-fond
mother but i have no patience continue banished from my presence 
undutiful as you are till you know how to conform to my will 
ingrateful creature your letter but upbraid me for my past indulgence 
write no more to me till you can distinguish better and till you are
convinced of your duty to

a justly incensed father 


 


this angry letter was accompanied by one from my mother unsealed and
unsuperscribed also those who take so much pains to confederate every
one against me i make no doubt obliged her to bear her testimony
against the poor girl 

my mother's letter being a repetition of some of the severe things that
passed between herself and me of which i have already informed you i
shall not need to give you the contents only thus far that she also
praises my brother and blames me for my freedoms with him 




letter xxvi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday morn march 9 


i have another letter from mr lovelace although i had not answered his
former 

this man somehow or other knows every thing that passes in our family 
my confinement hanna's dismission and more of the resentments and
resolutions of my father uncles and brother than i can possibly know 
and almost as soon as the things happen which he tells me of he cannot
come at these intelligencies fairly 

he is excessively uneasy upon what he hears and his expressions both
of love to me and resentment to them are very fervent he solicits me 
to engage my honour to him never to have mr solmes 

i think i may fairly promise him that i will not 

he begs that i will not think he is endeavouring to make to himself
a merit at any man's expense since he hopes to obtain my favour on the
foot of his own nor that he seeks to intimidate me into a consideration
for him but declares that the treatment he meets with from my family
is of such a nature that he is perpetually reproached for not resenting
it and that as well by lord m and lady sarah and lady betty as by
all his other friends and if he must have no hope from me he cannot
answer for what his despair will make him do 

indeed he says his relations the ladies particularly advise him to
have recourse to a legal remedy but how he asks can a man of honour
go to law for verbal abuses given by people entitled to wear swords 

you see my dear that my mother seems as apprehensive of mischief as
myself and has indirectly offered to let shorey carry my answer to the
letter he sent me before 

he is full of the favours of the ladies of his family to me to whom 
nevertheless i am personally a stranger except that i once saw miss
patty montague at mrs knolly's 

it is natural i believe for a person to be the more desirous of making
new friends in proportion as she loses the favour of old ones yet had
i rather appear amiable in the eyes of my own relations and in your
eyes than in those of all the world besides but these four ladies of
his family have such excellent characters that one cannot but wish to
be thought well of by them cannot there be a way to find out by mrs 
fortescue's means or by mr hickman who has some knowledge of lord m 
 covertly however   what their opinions are of the present situation of
things in our family and of the little likelihood there is that ever
the alliance once approved of by them can take effect 

i cannot for my own part think so well of myself as to imagine that
they can wish their kinsman to persevere in his views with regard to me 
through such contempts and discouragements not that it would concern
me should they advise him to the contrary by my lord's signing mr 
lovelace's former letter by mr lovelace's assurances of the continued
favour of all his relations and by the report of others i seem still
to stand high in their favour but methinks i should be glad to have
this confirmed to me as from themselves by the lips of an indifferent
person and the rather because of their fortunes and family and take
it amiss as they have reason to be included by ours in the contempt
thrown upon their kinsman 

curiosity at present is all my motive nor will there ever i hope be a
stronger notwithstanding your questionable throbs even were the merits
of mr lovelace much greater than they are 


 


i have answered his letters if he takes me at my word i shall need to
be less solicitous for the opinions of his relations in my favour and
yet one would be glad to be well thought of by the worthy 

this is the substance of my letter 

i express my surprise at his knowing and so early all that passes
here 

i assure him that were there not such a man in the world as himself i
would not have mr solmes 

i tell him that to return as i understand he does defiances for
defiances to my relations is far from being a proof with me either of
his politeness or of the consideration he pretends to have for me 

that the moment i hear he visits any of my friends without their
consent i will make a resolution never to see him more if i can help
it 

i apprize him that i am connived at in sending this letter although
no one has seen the contents provided it shall be the last i will ever
write to him that i had more than once told him that the single life
was my choice and this before mr solmes was introduced as a visitor
in our family that mr wyerley and other gentlemen knew it to be my
choice before himself was acquainted with any of us that i had never
been induced to receive a line from him on the subject but that i
thought he had not acted ungenerously by my brother and yet had not
been so handsomely treated by my friends as he might have expected 
but that had he even my friends on his side i should have very great
objections to him were i to get over my choice of a single life so
really preferable to me as it is and that i should have declared as
much to him had i not regarded him as more than a common visiter on
all these accounts i desire that the one more letter which i will
allow him to deposit in the usual place may be the very last and that
only to acquaint me with his acquiescence that it shall be so at least
till happier times 

this last i put in that he may not be quite desperate but if he take
me at my word i shall be rid of one of my tormentors 

i have promised to lay before you all his letters and my answers i
repeat that promise and am the less solicitous for that reason to
amplify upon the contents of either but i cannot too often express my
vexation to be driven to such streights and difficulties here at
home as oblige me to answer letters from a man i had not absolutely
intended to encourage and to whom i had really great objections 
filled as his are with such warm protestations and written to me with a
spirit of expectation 

for my dear you never knew so bold a supposer as commentators find
beauties in an author to which the author perhaps was a stranger so he
sometimes compliments me in high strains of gratitude for favours and
for a consideration which i never designed him insomuch that i am
frequently under a necessity of explaining away the attributed goodness
to him which if i shewed i should have the less opinion of myself 

in short my dear like a restiff horse as i have heard described by
sportsmen he pains one's hands and half disjoints one's arms to rein
him in and when you see his letters you must form no judgment upon
them till you have read my answers if you do you will indeed think
you have cause to attribute self-deceit and throbs and glows to your
friend and yet at other times the contradictory nature complains 
that i shew him as little favour and my friends as much inveteracy 
as if in the rencontre betwixt my brother and him he had been the
aggressor and as if the catastrophe had been as fatal as it might have
been 

if he has a design by this conduct sometimes complaining of my shyness 
at others exalting in my imaginary favours to induce me at one time to
acquiesce with his compliments at another to be more complaisant
for his complaints and if the contradiction be not the effect of his
inattention and giddiness i shall think him as deep and as artful too
probably as practised a creature as ever lived and were i to be sure
of it should hate him if possible worse than i do solmes 

but enough for the present of a creature so very various 




letter xxvii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe thursday night march 9 


i have not patience with any of the people you are with i know not what
to advise you to do how do you know that you are not punishable
for being the cause though to your own loss that the will of your
grandfather is not complied with wills are sacred things child you
see that they even they think so who imagine they suffer by a will 
through the distinction paid you in it 

i allow of all your noble reasonings for what you did at the time but 
since such a charming such a generous instance of filial duty is to go
thus unrewarded why should you not resume 

your grandfather knew the family-failing he knew what a noble spirit
you had to do good he himself perhaps  excuse me my dear   had done
too little in his life-time and therefore he put it in your power to
make up for the defects of the whole family were it to me i would
resume it indeed i would 

you will say you cannot do it while you are with them i don't know
that do you think they can use you worse than they do and is it not
your right and do they not make use of your own generosity to oppress
you your uncle harlowe is one trustee your cousin morden is the other 
insist upon your right to your uncle and write to your cousin morden
about it this i dare say will make them alter their behaviour to you 

your insolent brother what has he to do to controul you were it me  i
wish it were for one month and no more  i'd shew him the difference i
would be in my own mansion pursuing my charming schemes and making all
around me happy i would set up my own chariot i would visit them when
they deserved it but when my brother and sister gave themselves airs 
i would let them know that i was their sister and not their servant 
and if that did not do i would shut my gates against them and bid
them go and be company for each other 

it must be confessed however that this brother and sister of yours 
judging as such narrow spirits will ever judge have some reason for
treating you as they do it must have long been a mortification to
them set disappointed love on her side and avarice on his out of the
question to be so much eclipsed by a younger sister such a sun in a
family where there are none but faint twinklers how could they bear
it why my dear they must look upon you as a prodigy among them and
prodigies you know though they obtain our admiration never attract
our love the distance between you and them is immense their eyes ache
to look up at you what shades does your full day of merit cast
upon them can you wonder then that they should embrace the first
opportunity that offered to endeavour to bring you down to their level 

depend upon it my dear you will have more of it and more still as
you bear it 

as to this odious solmes i wonder not at your aversion to him it is
needless to say any thing to you who have so sincere any antipathy to
him to strengthen your dislike yet who can resist her own talents 
one of mine as i have heretofore said is to give an ugly likeness 
shall i indulge it i will and the rather as in doing so you
will have my opinion in justification of your aversion to him and
in approbation of a steadiness that i ever admired and must for ever
approve of in your temper 

i was twice in this wretch's company at one of the times your lovelace
was there i need not mention to you who have such a pretty curiosity 
 though at present only a curiosity you know the unspeakable
difference 

lovelace entertained the company in his lively gay way and made
every body laugh at one of his stories it was before this creature was
thought of for you solmes laughed too it was however his laugh for
his first three years at least i imagine must have been one continual
fit of crying and his muscles have never yet been able to recover a
risible tone his very smile  you never saw him smile i believe never
at least gave him cause to smile  is so little natural to his features 
that it appears to him as hideous as the grin of a man in malice 

i took great notice of him as i do of all the noble lords of the
creation in their peculiarities and was disgusted nay shocked at
him even then i was glad i remember on that particular occasion 
to see his strange features recovering their natural gloominess though
they did this but slowly as if the muscles which contributed to his
distortions had turned upon rusty springs 

what a dreadful thing must even the love of such a husband be for my
part were i his wife but what have i done to myself to make such a
supposition i should never have comfort but in his absence or when
i was quarreling with him a splenetic woman who must have somebody to
find fault with might indeed be brought to endure such a wretch 
the sight of him would always furnish out the occasion and all her
servants for that reason and for that only would have cause to blame
their master but how grievous and apprehensive a thing it must be for
his wife had she the least degree of delicacy to catch herself in
having done something to oblige him 

so much for his person as to the other half of him he is said to be
an insinuating creeping mortal to any body he hopes to be a gainer by 
an insolent overbearing one where he has no such views and is not
this the genuine spirit of meanness he is reported to be spiteful and
malicious even to the whole family of any single person who has once
disobliged him and to his own relations most of all i am told that
they are none of them such wretches as himself this may be one reason
why he is for disinheriting them 

my kitty from one of his domestics tells me that his tenants hate
him and that he never had a servant who spoke well of him vilely
suspicious of their wronging him probably from the badness of his own
heart he is always changing 

his pockets they say are continually crammed with keys so that when
he would treat a guest a friend he has not out of your family he is
half as long puzzling which is which as his niggardly treat might be
concluded in and if it be wine he always fetches it himself nor has
he much trouble in doing so for he has very few visiters only those 
whom business or necessity brings for a gentleman who can help it 
would rather be benighted than put up at his house 

yet this is the man they have found out for considerations as sordid as
those he is governed by for a husband that is to say for a lord and
master for miss clarissa harlowe 

but perhaps he may not be quite so miserable as he is represented 
characters extremely good or extremely bad are seldom justly given 
favour for a person will exalt the one as disfavour will sink the
other but your uncle antony has told my mother who objected to his
covetousness that it was intended to tie him up as he called it to
your own terms which would be with a hempen rather than a matrimonial 
cord i dare say but is not this a plain indication that even his
own recommenders think him a mean creature and that he must be articled
with perhaps for necessaries but enough and too much of such a
wretch as this you must not have him my dear that i am clear
in though not so clear how you will be able to avoid it except you
assert the independence to which your estate gives you a title 


 


here my mother broke in upon me she wanted to see what i had written i
was silly enough to read solmes's character to her 

she owned that the man was not the most desirable of men and that he
had not the happiest appearance but what said she is person in a man 
and i was chidden for setting you against complying with your father's
will then followed a lecture on the preference to be given in favour of
a man who took care to discharge all his obligations to the world and
to keep all together in opposition to a spendthrift or profligate a
fruitful subject you know whether any particular person be meant by it 
or not 

why will these wise parents by saying too much against the persons they
dislike put one upon defending them lovelace is not a spendthrift 
owes not obligations to the world though i doubt not profligate
enough then putting one upon doing such but common justice we
must needs be prepossessed truly and so perhaps we are put upon
curiosities first that is to say how such a one or his friends may
think of one and then but too probably comes in a distinguishing
preference or something that looks exceedingly like it 

my mother charged me at last to write that side over again but
excuse me my good mamma i would not have the character lost upon any
consideration since my vein ran freely into it and i never wrote to
please myself but i pleased you a very good reason why we have but
one mind between us only that sometimes you are a little too grave 
methinks i no doubt a little too flippant in your opinion 

this difference in our tempers however is probably the reason that we
love one another so well that in the words of norris no third love can
come in betwixt since each in the other's eye having something amiss 
and each loving the other well enough to bear being told of it and the
rather perhaps as neither wishes to mend it this takes off a good deal
from that rivalry which might encourage a little if not a great deal 
of that latent spleen which in time might rise into envy and that into
ill-will so my dear if this be the case let each keep her fault and
much good may do her with it and what an hero or heroine must he or
she be who can conquer a constitutional fault let it be avarice as in
some i dare not name let it be gravity as in my best friend or let it
be flippancy as in i need not say whom 

it is proper to acquaint you that i was obliged to comply with my
mother's curiosity  my mother has her share her full share of
curiosity my dear   and to let her see here-and-there some passages in
your letters 

i am broken in upon but i will tell you by-and-by what passed between
my mother and me on this occasion and the rather as she had her girl 
her favourite hickman and your lovelace all at once in her eye in her
part of the conversation 

thus it was 

i cannot but think nancy said she after all that there is a little
hardship in miss harlowe's case and yet as her mother says it is
a grating thing to have a child who was always noted for her duty
in smaller points to stand in opposition to her parents' will in the
greater yea in the greatest of all and now to middle the matter
between both it is pity that the man they favour has not that sort of
merit which a person of a mind so delicate as that of miss harlowe might
reasonably expect in a husband but then this man is surely preferable
to a libertine to a libertine too who has had a duel with her own
brother fathers and mothers must think so were it not for that
circumstance and it is strange if they do not know best 

and so they must thought i from their experience if no little dirty
views give them also that prepossession in one man's favour which they
are so apt to censure their daughters for having in another's and
if as i may add in your case they have no creeping old musty uncle
antonys to strengthen their prepossessions as he does my mother's 
poor creeping positive soul what has such an old bachelor as he to
do to prate about the duties of children to parents unless he had a
notion that parents owe some to their children but your mother by her
indolent meekness let me call it has spoiled all the three brothers 

but you see child proceeded my mother what a different behaviour
mine is to you i recommend to you one of the soberest yet politest 
men in england 

i think little of my mother's politest my dear she judges of honest
hickman for her daughter as she would have done i suppose twenty
years ago for herself 

of a good family continued my mother a fine clear and improving
estate  a prime consideration with my mother as well as with some other
folks whom you know  and i beg and i pray you to encourage him at
least not to use him the worse for his being so obsequious to you 

yes indeed to use him kindly that he may treat me familiarly but
distance to the men-wretches is best i say 

yet all will hardly prevail upon you to do as i would have you what
would you say were i to treat you as miss harlowe's father and mother
treat her 

what would i say madam that's easily answered i would say nothing 
can you think such usage and to such a young lady is to be borne 

come come nancy be not so hasty you have heard but one side and
that there is more to be said is plain by your reading to me but parts
of her letters they are her parents they must know best miss harlowe 
as fine a child as she is must have done something must have said
something you know how they loved her to make them treat her thus 

but if she should be blameless madam how does your own supposition
condemn them 

then came up solmes's great estate his good management of it a little
too near indeed  was the word  o how money-lovers thought i will
palliate yet my mother is a princess in spirit to this solmes   what
strange effects added she have prepossession and love upon young
ladies 

i don't know how it is my dear but people take high delight in finding
out folks in love curiosity begets curiosity i believe that's the
thing 

she proceeded to praise mr lovelace's person and his qualifications
natural and acquired but then she would judge as mothers will judge 
and as daughters are very loth to judge but could say nothing in answer
to your offer of living single and breaking with him if if  three or
four if's she made of one good one if  that could be depended on 

but still obedience without reserve reason what i will is the burden
of my mother's song and this for my sake as well as for yours 

i must needs say that i think duty to parents is a very meritorious
excellence but i bless god i have not your trials we can all be good
when we have no temptation nor provocation to the contrary but few
young persons who can help themselves too as you can would bear what
you bear 

i will now mention all that is upon my mind in relation to the
behaviour of your father and uncles and the rest of them because
i would not offend you but i have now a higher opinion of my own
sagacity than ever i had in that i could never cordially love any one
of your family but yourself i am not born to like them but it is my
duty to be sincere to my friend and this will excuse her anna howe to
miss clarissa harlowe 

i ought indeed to have excepted your mother a lady to be reverenced 
and now to be pitied what must have been her treatment to be thus
subjugated as i may call it little did the good old viscount think 
when he married his darling his only daughter to so well-appearing a
gentleman and to her own liking too that she would have been so much
kept down another would call your father a tyrant if i must not all
the world that know him do call him so and if you love your mother 
you should not be very angry at the world for taking that liberty 

yet after all i cannot help thinking that she is the less to be
pitied as she may be said be the gout or what will the occasion
of his moroseness to have long behaved unworthy of her birth and fine
qualities in yielding so much as she yields to encroaching spirits
 you may confine the reflection to your brother if it will pain you
to extend it  and this for the sake of preserving a temporary peace to
herself which was the less worth endeavouring to preserve as it always
produced a strength in the will of others which subjected her to an
arbitrariness that of course grew and became established upon her
patience and now to give up the most deserving of her children
 against her judgment a sacrifice to the ambition and selfishness of
the least deserving but i fly from this subject having i fear said
too much to be forgiven and yet much less than is in my heart to say
upon the over-meek subject 

mr hickman is expected from london this evening i have desired him to
inquire after lovelace's life and conversation in town if he has not
inquired i shall be very angry with him don't expect a very good
account of either he is certainly an intriguing wretch and full of
inventions 

upon my word i most heartily despise that sex i wish they would let
our fathers and mothers alone teasing them to tease us with their
golden promises and protestations and settlements and the rest
of their ostentatious nonsense how charmingly might you and i live
together and despise them all but to be cajoled wire-drawn 
and ensnared like silly birds into a state of bondage or vile
subordination to be courted as princesses for a few weeks in order to
be treated as slaves for the rest of our lives indeed my dear as you
say of solmes i cannot endure them but for your relations  friends no
more will i call them unworthy as they are even of the other name  
to take such a wretch's price as that and to the cutting off of all
reversions from his own family how must a mind but commonly just
resist such a measure 

mr hickman shall sound lord m upon the subject you recommend but
beforehand i can tell you what he and what his sisters will say when
they are sounded who would not be proud of such a relation as miss
clarissa harlowe mrs fortescue told me that they are all your very
great admirers 

if i have not been clear enough in my advice about what you shall do 
let me say that i can give it in one word it is only by re-urging you
to resume if you do all the rest will follow 

we are told here that mrs norton as well as your aunt hervey has
given her opinion on the implicit side of the question if she can
think that the part she has had in your education and your own
admirable talents and acquirements are to be thrown away upon such a
worthless creature as solmes i could heartily quarrel with her you may
think i say this to lessen your regard for the good woman and perhaps
not wholly without cause if you do for to own the truth methinks 
i don't love her so well as i should do did you love her so apparently
less that i could be out of doubt that you love me better 

your mother tells you that you will have great trials that you are
under your father's discipline  the word is enough for me to despise
them who give occasion for its use that it is out of her power to
help you  and again that if you have any favour to hope for it must
be by the mediation of your uncles  i suppose you will write to the
oddities since you are forbid to see them but can it be that such a
lady such a sister such a wife such a mother has no influence in her
own family who indeed as you say if this be so would marry that
can live single my choler is again beginning to rise resume my dear 
and that is all i will give myself time to say further lest i offend
you when i cannot serve you only this that i am

your truly affectionate friend and servant anna howe 




letter xxviii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday march 10 


you will permit me my dear to touch upon a few passages in your last
letter that affect me sensibly 

in the first place you must allow me to say low as i am in spirits 
that i am very angry with you for your reflections on my relations 
particularly on my father and mother and on the memory of my
grandfather nor my dear does your own mother always escape the keen
edge of your vivacity one cannot one's self forbear to write or speak
freely of those we love and honour when grief from imagined hard
treatment wrings the heart but it goes against one to hear any body
else take the same liberties then you have so very strong a manner of
expression where you take a distaste that when passion has subdued 
and i come upon reflection to see by your severity what i have given
occasion for i cannot help condemning myself 

but least of all can i bear that you should reflect upon my mother 
what my dear if her meekness should not be rewarded is the want of
reward or the want even of a grateful acknowledgement a reason for us
to dispense with what we think our duty they were my father's lively
spirits that first made him an interest in her gentle bosom they were
the same spirits turned inward as i have heretofore observed that
made him so impatient when the cruel malady seized him he always loved
my mother and would not love and pity excusably nay laudably make a
good wife who was an hourly witness of his pangs when labouring under
a paroxysm and his paroxysms becoming more and more frequent as well
as more and more severe give up her own will her own likings 
to oblige a husband thus afflicted whose love for her was
unquestionable and if so was it not too natural  human nature is not
perfect my dear  that the husband thus humoured by the wife should be
unable to bear controul from any body else much less contradiction from
his children 


 see letter v 


if then you would avoid my highest displeasure you must spare my
mother and surely you will allow me with her to pity as well as to
love and honour my father 

i have no friend but you to whom i can appeal to whom i dare complain 
unhappily circumstanced as i am it is but too probable that i shall
complain because it is but too probably that i shall have more and more
cause given me for complaint but be it your part if i do to sooth my
angry passions and to soften my resentments and this the rather as
you know what an influence your advice has upon me and as you must
also know that the freedoms you take with my friends can have no other
tendency but to weaken the sense of my duty to them without answering
any good end to myself 

i cannot help owning however that i am pleased to have you join with
me in opinion of the contempt which mr solmes deserves from me but
yet permit me to say that he is not quite so horrible a creature as
you make him as to his person i mean for with regard to his mind 
by all i have heard you have done him but justice but you have such
a talent at an ugly likeness and such a vivacity that they sometimes
carry you out of verisimilitude in short my dear i have known you in
more instances than one sit down resolved to write all that wit rather
than strict justice could suggest upon the given occasion perhaps it
may be thought that i should say the less on this particular subject 
because your dislike of him arises from love to me but should it not be
our aim to judge of ourselves and of every thing that affects us as
we may reasonably imagine other people would judge of us and of our
actions 

as to the advice you give to resume my estate i am determined not to
litigate with my father let what will be the consequence to myself 
i may give you at another time a more particular answer to your
reasonings on this subject but at present will only observe that
it is in my opinion that lovelace himself would hardly think me worth
addressing were he to know this would be my resolution these men my
dear with all their flatteries look forward to the permanent indeed 
it is fit they should for love must be a very foolish thing to look
back upon when it has brought persons born to affluence into indigence 
and laid a generous mind under obligation and dependence 

you very ingeniously account for the love we bear to one another from
the difference in our tempers i own i should not have thought of that 
there may possibly be something in it but whether there be or not 
whenever i am cool and give myself time to reflect i will love you the
better for the correction you give be as severe as you will upon me 
spare me not therefore my dear friend whenever you think me in the
least faulty i love your agreeable raillery you know i always did 
nor however over-serious you think me did i ever think you flippant 
as you harshly call it one of the first conditions of our mutual
friendship was each should say or write to the other whatever was upon
her mind without any offence to be taken a condition that is indeed
indispensable in friendship 

i knew your mother would be for implicit obedience in a child i am
sorry my case is so circumstanced that i cannot comply it would be
my duty to do so if i could you are indeed very happy that you have
nothing but your own agreeable yet whimsical humours to contend with 
in the choice she invites you to make of mr hickman how happy i should
be to be treated with so much lenity i should blush to have my mother
say that she begged and prayed me and all in vain to encourage a man
so unexceptionable as mr hickman 

indeed my beloved miss howe i am ashamed to have your mother say with
me in her view what strange effects have prepossession and love upon
young creatures of our sex  this touches me the more sensibly because
you yourself my dear are so ready to persuade me into it 

i should be very blamable to endeavour to hide any the least bias
upon my mind from you and i cannot but say that this man this
lovelace is a man that might be liked well enough if he bore such
a character as mr hickman bears and even if there were hopes of
reclaiming him and further still i will acknowledge that i believe it
possible that one might be driven by violent measures step by step as
it were into something that might be called i don't know what to
call it a conditional kind of liking or so but as to the word
love justifiable and charming as it is in some cases that is to say 
in all the relative in all the social and what is still beyond both 
in all our superior duties in which it may be properly called divine 
it has methinks in the narrow circumscribed selfish peculiar sense 
in which you apply it to me the man too so little to be approved of
for his morals if all that report says of him be true no pretty sound
with it treat me as freely as you will in all other respects i will
love you as i have said the better for your friendly freedom but 
methinks i could be glad that you would not let this imputation pass so
glibly from your pen or your lips as attributable to one of your own
sex whether i be the person or not since the other must have a double
triumph when a person of your delicacy armed with such contempts of
them all as you would have one think can give up a friend with an
exultation over her weakness as a silly love-sick creature 

i could make some other observations upon the contents of your last two
letters but my mind is not free enough at present the occasion for the
above stuck with me and i could not help taking the earliest notice of
them 

having written to the end of my second sheet i will close this letter 
and in my next acquaint you with all that has happened here since my
last 




letter xxix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe saturday march 11 


i have had such taunting messages and such repeated avowals of ill
offices brought me from my brother and sister if i do no comply with
their wills delivered too with provoking sauciness by betty barnes 
that i have thought it proper before i entered upon my intended address
to my uncles in pursuance of the hint given me in my mother's letter 
to expostulate a little with them but i have done it in such a manner 
as will give you if you please to take it as you have done some parts
of my former letters great advantage over me in short you will have
more cause than ever to declare me far gone in love if my reasons for
the change of my style in these letters with regard to mr lovelace do
not engage your more favourable opinion for i have thought proper to
give them their own way and since they will have it that i have a
preferable regard for mr lovelace i give them cause rather to confirm
their opinion than doubt it 

these are my reasons in brief for the alteration of my style 

in the first place they have grounded their principal argument for my
compliance with their will upon my acknowledgement that my heart is
free and so supposing i give up no preferable person my opposition
has the look of downright obstinacy in their eyes and they argue 
that at worst my aversion to solmes is an aversion that may be easily
surmounted and ought to be surmounted in duty to my father and for the
promotion of family views 

next although they build upon this argument in order to silence me 
they seem not to believe me but treat me as disgracefully as if i
were in love with one of my father's footmen so that my conditional
willingness to give up mr lovelace has procured me no favour 

in the next place i cannot but think that my brother's antipathy
to mr lovelace is far from being well grounded the man's inordinate
passion for the sex is the crime that is always rung in my ears and a
very great one it is but does my brother recriminate upon him thus
in love to me no his whole behaviour shews me that that is not
his principal motive and that he thinks me rather in his way than
otherwise 

it is then the call of justice as i may say to speak a little in
favour of a man who although provoked by my brother did not do
him all the mischief he could have done him and which my brother had
endeavoured to do him it might not be amiss therefore i thought to
alarm them a little with apprehension that the methods they are taking
with me are the very reverse of those they should take to answer the end
they design by them and after all what is the compliment i make mr 
lovelace if i allow it to be thought that i do really prefer him to
such a man as him they terrify me with then my miss howe  concluded i 
accuses me of a tameness which subject me to insults from my brother i
will keep that dear friend in my eye and for all these considerations 
try what a little of her spirit will do sit it ever so awkwardly upon
me 

in this way of thinking i wrote to my brother and sister this is my
letter to him 



treated as i am and in a great measure if not wholly by your
instigations brother you must permit me to expostulate with you upon
the occasion it is not my intention to displease you in what i am going
to write and yet i must deal freely with you the occasion calls for
it 

and permit me in the first place to remind you that i am your sister 
and not your servant and that therefore the bitter revilings and
passionate language brought me from you upon an occasion in which you
have no reason to prescribe to me are neither worthy of my character to
bear nor of yours to offer 

put the case that i were to marry the man you dislike and that he were
not to make a polite or tender husband is that a reason for you to be
an unpolite and disobliging brother why must you sir anticipate my
misfortunes were such a case to happen let me tell you plainly 
that the man who could treat me as a wife worse than you of late have
treated me as a sister must be a barbarous man indeed 

ask yourself i pray you sir if you would thus have treated your
sister bella had she thought fit to receive the addresses of the man so
much hated by you if not let me caution you my brother not to take
your measures by what you think will be borne but rather by what ought
to be offered 

how would you take it if you had a brother who in a like case were
to act by you as you do by me you cannot but remember what a laconic
answer you gave even to my father who recommended to you miss nelly
d'oily you did not like her were your words and that was thought
sufficient 

you must needs think that i cannot but know to whom to attribute my
disgraces when i recollect my father's indulgence to me permitting
me to decline several offers and to whom that a common cause is
endeavoured to be made in favour of a man whose person and manners
are more exceptional than those of any of the gentlemen i have been
permitted to refuse 

i offer not to compare the two men together nor is there indeed the
least comparison to be made between them all the difference to
the one's disadvantage if i did is but one point of the greatest
importance indeed but to whom of most importance to myself surely 
were i to encourage his application of the least to you nevertheless 
if you do not by your strange politics unite that man and me as joint
sufferers in one cause you shall find me as much resolved to renounce
him as i am to refuse the other i have made an overture to this
purpose i hope you will not give me reason to confirm my apprehensions 
that it will be owing to you if it be not accepted 

it is a sad thing to have it to say without being conscious of ever
having given you cause of offence that i have in you a brother but not
a friend 

perhaps you will not condescend to enter into the reasons of your
late and present conduct with a foolish sister but if politeness if
civility be not due to that character and to my sex justice is 

let me take the liberty further to observe that the principal end of
a young man's education at the university is to learn him to reason
justly and to subdue the violence of his passions i hope brother 
that you will not give room for any body who knows us both to conclude 
that the toilette has taught the one more of the latter doctrine than
the university has taught the other i am truly sorry to have cause
to say that i have heard it often remarked that your uncontrouled
passions are not a credit to your liberal education 

i hope sir that you will excuse the freedom i have taken with you you
have given me too much reason for it and you have taken much greater
with me without reason so if you are offended ought to look at the
cause and not at the effect then examining yourself that cause will
cease and there will not be any where a more accomplished gentleman
than my brother 

sisterly affection i do assure you sir unkindly as you have used
me and not the pertness which of late you have been so apt to impute
to me is my motive in this hint let me invoke your returning kindness 
my only brother and give me cause i beseech you to call you my
compassionating friend for i am and ever will be 

your affectionate sister clarissa harlowe 


 


this is my brother's answer 


to miss clarissa harlowe

i know there will be no end of your impertinent scribble if i don't
write to you i write therefore but without entering into argument
with such a conceited and pert preacher and questioner it is to forbid
you to plague me with your quaint nonsense i know not what wit in a
woman is good for but to make her overvalue herself and despise every
other person yours miss pert has set you above your duty and above
being taught or prescribed to either by parents or any body else but
go on miss your mortification will be the greater that's all child 
it shall i assure you if i can make it so so long as you prefer that
villainous lovelace who is justly hated by all your family to every
body we see by your letter now what we too justly suspected before 
most evidently we see the hold he has got of your forward heart but
the stronger the hold the greater must be the force and you shall have
enough of that to tear such a miscreant from it in me notwithstanding
your saucy lecturing and your saucy reflections before you are sure of
a friend as well as of a brother if it be not your own fault but if
you will still think of such a wretch as that lovelace never expect
either friend or brother in

ja harlowe 


 


i will now give you a copy of my letter to my sister with her answer 


in what my dear sister have i offended you that instead of
endeavouring to soften my father's anger against me as i am sure i
should have done for you had my unhappy case been yours you should 
in so hard-hearted a manner join to aggravate not only his displeasure 
but my mother's against me make but my case your own my dear bella 
and suppose you were commanded to marry mr lovelace to whom you
are believed to have such an antipathy would you not think it a very
grievous injunction yet cannot your dislike to mr lovelace be greater
than mine is to mr solmes nor are love and hatred voluntary passions 

my brother may perhaps think it a proof of a manly spirit to shew
himself an utter stranger to the gentle passions we have both heard him
boast that he never loved with distinction and having predominating
passions and checked in his first attempt perhaps he never will it
is the less wonder then raw from the college so lately himself the
tutored that he should set up for a tutor a prescriber to our
gentler sex whose tastes and manners are differently formed for what 
according to his account are colleges but classes of tyrants from
the upper students over the lower and from them to the tutor that he 
with such masculine passions should endeavour to controul and bear down
an unhappy sister in a case where his antipathy and give me leave
to say his ambition  once you would have allowed the latter to be his
fault  can be gratified by so doing may not be quite so much to be
wondered at but that a sister should give up the cause of a sister and
join with him to set her father and mother against her in a case that
might have been her own indeed my bella this is not pretty in you 

there was a time that mr lovelace was thought reclaimable and when it
was far from being deemed a censurable view to hope to bring back to the
paths of virtue and honour a man of his sense and understanding i am
far from wishing to make the experiment but nevertheless will say that
if i have not a regard for him the disgraceful methods taken to compel
me to receive the addresses of such a man as mr solmes are enough to
induce it 

do you my sister for one moment lay aside all prejudice and compare
the two men in their births their educations their persons their
understandings their manners their air and their whole deportments 
and in their fortunes too taking in reversions and then judge of both 
yet as i have frequently offered i will live single with all my heart 
if that will do 

i cannot thus live in displeasure and disgrace i would if i could 
oblige all my friends but will it be just will it be honest to marry
a man i cannot endure if i have not been used to oppose the will of
my father but have always delighted to oblige and obey judge of the
strength of my antipathy by the painful opposition i am obliged to
make and cannot help it 

pity then my dearest bella my sister my friend my companion my
adviser as you used to be when i was happy and plead for

your ever-affectionate cl harlowe 


 


to miss clary harlowe

let it be pretty or not pretty in your wise opinion i shall speak my
mind i will assure you both of you and your conduct in relation
to this detested lovelace you are a fond foolish girl with all your
wisdom your letter shews that enough in twenty places and as to your
cant of living single nobody will believe you this is one of your
fetches to avoid complying with your duty and the will of the most
indulgent parents in the world as yours have been to you i am
sure though now they see themselves finely requited for it 

we all indeed once thought your temper soft and amiable but why was
it you never were contradicted before you had always your own way but
no sooner do you meet with opposition in your wishes to throw yourself
away upon a vile rake but you shew what you are you cannot love mr 
solmes that's the pretence but sister sister let me tell you that
is because lovelace has got into your fond heart a wretch hated 
justly hated by us all and who has dipped his hands in the blood of
your brother yet him you would make our relation would you 

i have no patience with you but for putting the case of my liking such
a vile wretch as him as to the encouragement you pretend he received
formerly from all our family it was before we knew him to be so vile 
and the proofs that had such force upon us ought to have had some upon
you and would had you not been a foolish forward girl as on this
occasion every body sees you are 

o how you run out in favour of the wretch his birth his
education his person his understanding his manners his air his
fortune reversions too taken in to augment the surfeiting catalogue 
what a fond string of lovesick praises is here and yet you would live
single yes i warrant when so many imaginary perfections dance before
your dazzled eye but no more i only desire that you will not while
you seem to have such an opinion of your wit think every one else a
fool and that you can at pleasure by your whining flourishes make us
all dance after your lead 

write as often as you will this shall be the last answer or notice you
shall have upon this subject from

arabella harlowe 


 


i had in readiness a letter for each of my uncles and meeting in the
garden a servant of my uncle harlowe i gave him to deliver according to
their respective directions if i am to form a judgment by the answers i
have received from my brother and sister as above i must not i
doubt expect any good from those letters but when i have tried every
expedient i shall have the less to blame myself for if any thing
unhappy should fall out i will send you copies of both when i shall
see what notice they will be thought worthy of if of any 




letter xxx

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sunday night march 12 


this man this lovelace gives me great uneasiness he is extremely bold
and rash he was this afternoon at our church in hopes to see me i
suppose and yet if he had such hopes his usual intelligence must have
failed him 

shorey was at church and a principal part of her observation was upon
his haughty and proud behaviour when he turned round in the pew where he
sat to our family-pew my father and both my uncles were there so were
my mother and sister my brother happily was not they all came home in
disorder nor did the congregation mind any body but him it being his
first appearance there since the unhappy rencounter 

what did the man come for if he intended to look challenge and
defiance as shorey says he did and as others it seems thought he
did as well as she did he come for my sake and by behaving in such
a manner to those present of my family imagine he was doing me either
service or pleasure he knows how they hate him nor will he take
pains would pains do to obviate their hatred 

you and i my dear have often taken notice of his pride and you have
rallied him upon it and instead of exculpating himself he has owned
it and by owning it he has thought he has done enough 

for my own part i thought pride in his case an improper subject for
raillery people of birth and fortune to be proud is so needless 
so mean a vice if they deserve respect they will have it without
requiring it in other words for persons to endeavour to gain respect
by a haughty behaviour is to give a proof that they mistrust their own
merit to make confession that they know that their actions will not
attract it distinction or quality may be prided in by those to whom
distinction or quality is a new thing and then the reflection and
contempt which such bring upon themselves by it is a counter-balance 

such added advantages too as this man has in his person and mien 
learned also as they say he is such a man to be haughty to be
imperious the lines of his own face at the same time condemning
him how wholly inexcusable proud of what not of doing well the only
justifiable pride proud of exterior advantages must not one be led
by such a stop-short pride as i may call it in him or her who has it 
to mistrust the interior some people may indeed be afraid that if
they did not assume they would be trampled upon a very narrow fear 
however since they trample upon themselves who can fear this but this
man must be secure that humility would be an ornament to him 

he has talents indeed but those talents and his personal advantages
have been snares to him it is plain they have and this shews that 
weighed in an equal balance he would be found greatly wanting 

had my friends confided as they did at first in that discretion which
they do not accuse me of being defective in i dare say i should have
found him out and then should have been as resolute to dismiss him as
i was to dismiss others and as i am never to have mr solmes o that
they did but know my heart it shall sooner burst than voluntarily 
uncompelled undriven dictate a measure that shall cast a slur either
upon them or upon my sex 

excuse me my dear friend for these grave soliloquies as i may call
them how have i run from reflection to reflection but the occasion is
recent they are all in commotion below upon it 

shorey says that mr lovelace watched my mother's eye and bowed to
her and she returned the compliment he always admired my mother she
would not i believe have hated him had she not been bid to hate him 
and had it not been for the rencounter between him and her only son 

dr lewen was at church and observing as every one else did the
disorder into which mr lovelace's appearance had put all our family 
was so good as to engage him in conversation when the service was over 
till they were all gone to their coaches 


 see letter xxxi for mr lovelace's account of his
 behaviour and intentions in his appearance at church 


my uncles had my letters in the morning they as well as my father 
are more and more incensed against me it seems their answers if
they vouchsafe to answer me will demonstrate i doubt not the
unseasonableness of this rash man's presence at our church 

they are angry also as i understand with my mother for returning
his compliment what an enemy is hatred even to the common forms of
civility which however more distinguish the payer of a compliment 
than the receiver but they all see they say that there is but one way
to put an end to his insults so i shall suffer and in what will the
rash man have benefited himself or mended his prospects 

i am extremely apprehensive that this worse than ghost-like appearance
of his bodes some still bolder step if he come hither and very
desirous he is of my leave to come i am afraid there will be murder to
avoid that if there were no other way i would most willingly be buried
alive 

they are all in consultation upon my letters i suppose so they were
in the morning which occasioned my uncles to be at our church i will
send you the copies of those letters as i promised in my last when
i see whether i can give you their answers with them this letter is
all i cannot tell what the effect of apprehension and displeasure
at the man who has occasioned my apprehensions six lines would have
contained all that is in it to the purpose of my story 

cl h 




letter xxxi

mr lovelace to john belford esq monday march 13 


in vain dost thou and thy compeers press me to go to town while i am
in such an uncertainty as i am in at present with this proud beauty 
all the ground i have hitherto gained with her is entirely owing to her
concern for the safety of people whom i have reason to hate 

 these gentlemen affected what they called the roman style
 to wit the thee and the thou in their letters and it was
 an agreed rule with them to take in good part whatever
 freedoms they treated each other with if the passages were
 written in that style 

write then thou biddest me if i will not come that indeed i can do 
and as well without a subject as with one and what follows shall be a
proof of it 

the lady's malevolent brother has now as i told thee at m hall 
introduced another man the most unpromising in his person and
qualities the most formidable in his offers that has yet appeared 

this man has by his proposals captivated every soul of the
harlowes soul did i say there is not a soul among them but my
charmer's and she withstanding them all is actually confined and
otherwise maltreated by a father the most gloomy and positive at the
instigation of a brother the most arrogant and selfish but thou knowest
their characters and i will not therefore sully my paper with them 

but is it not a confounded thing to be in love with one who is the
daughter the sister the niece of a family i must eternally despise 
and the devil of it that love increasing with her what shall i call
it tis not scorn tis not pride tis not the insolence of an
adored beauty but tis to virtue it seems that my difficulties are
owin and i pay for not being a sly sinner an hypocrite for being
regardless of my reputation for permittin slander to open its mouth
against me but is it necessary for such a one as i who have been used
to carry all before me upon my own terms i who never inspired a fear 
that had not a discernibly-predominant mixture of love in it to be a
hypocrite well says the poet 

 he who seems virtuous does but act a part 
 and shews not his own nature but his art 

well but it seems i must practise for this art if it would succeed
with this truly-admirable creature but why practise for it cannot
i indeed reform i have but one vice have i jack thou knowest my
heart if any man living does as far as i know it myself thou knowest
it but tis a cursed deceiver for it has many a time imposed upon its
master master did i say that i am not now nor have i been from the
moment i beheld this angel of a woman prepared indeed as i was by her
character before i saw her for what a mind must that be which 
though not virtuous itself admires not virtue in another my visit
to arabella owing to a mistake of the sister into which as thou hast
heard me say i was led by the blundering uncle who was to introduce
me but lately come from abroad to the divinity as i thought but 
instead of her carried me to a mere mortal and much difficulty had i 
so fond and forward my lady to get off without forfeiting all with a
family i intended should give me a goddess 

i have boasted that i was once in love before and indeed i thought
i was it was in my early manhood with that quality jilt whose
infidelity i have vowed to revenge upon as many of the sex as shall come
into my power i believe in different climes i have already
sacrificed an hecatomb to my nemesis in pursuance of this vow but upon
recollecting what i was then and comparing it with what i find myself
now i cannot say that i was ever in love before 

what was it then dost thou ask me since the disappointment had such
effects upon me when i found myself jilted that i was hardly kept in
my senses why i'll grant thee what as near as i can remember for
it was a great while ago it was egad jack i can hardly tell what
it was but a vehement aspiration after a novelty i think those
confounded poets with their terrenely-celestial descriptions did as
much with me as the lady they fired my imagination and set me upon
a desire to become a goddess-maker i must needs try my new-fledged
pinions in sonnet elogy and madrigal i must have a cynthia a stella 
a sacharissa as well as the best of them darts and flames and the
devil knows what must i give to my cupid i must create beauty and
place it where nobody else could find it and many a time have i been at
a loss for a subject when my new-created goddess has been kinder than
it was proper for my plaintive sonnet that she should be 

then i found i had a vanity of another sort in my passion i found
myself well received among the women in general and i thought it a
pretty lady-like tyranny  i was then very young and very vain   to
single out some one of the sex to make half a score jealous and i can
tell thee it had its effect for many an eye have i made to sparkle
with rival indignation many a cheek glow and even many a fan have i
caused to be snapped at a sister-beauty accompanied with a reflection
perhaps at being seen alone with a wild young fellow who could not be in
private with both at once 

in short jack it was more pride than love as i now find it that put
me upon making such a confounded rout about losing that noble varletess 
i thought she loved me at least as well as i believed i loved her 
nay i had the vanity to suppose she could not help it my friends were
pleased with my choice they wanted me to be shackled for early did
they doubt my morals as to the sex they saw that the dancing the
singing the musical ladies were all fond of my company for who  i am
in a humour to be vain i think   for who danced who sung who touched
the string whatever the instrument with a better grace than thy
friend 

i have no notion of playing the hypocrite so egregiously as to pretend
to be blind to qualifications which every one sees and acknowledges 
such praise-begetting hypocrisy such affectedly disclaimed attributes 
such contemptible praise-traps but yet shall my vanity extend only
to personals such as the gracefulness of dress my debonnaire and my
assurance self-taught self-acquired these for my parts i value
not myself upon them thou wilt say i have no cause perhaps not but
if i had any thing valuable as to intellectuals those are not my own 
and to be proud of what a man is answerable for the abuse of and has
no merit in the right use of is to strut like the jay in borrowed
plumage 

but to return to my fair jilt i could not bear that a woman who was
the first that had bound me in silken fetters  they were not iron ones 
like those i now wear  should prefer a coronet to me and when the bird
was flown i set more value upon it that when i had it safe in my cage 
and could visit in when i pleased 

but now am i indeed in love i can think of nothing of nobody but
the divine clarissa harlowe harlowe how that hated word sticks in my
throat but i shall give her for it the name of love 


 lovelace 


 clarissa o there's music in the name 
 that soft'ning me to infant tenderness 
 makes my heart spring like the first leaps of life 

but couldst thou have believed that i who think it possible for me
to favour as much as i can be favoured that i who for this charming
creature think of foregoing the life of honour for the life of shackles 
could adopt these over-tender lines of otway 

i checked myself and leaving the first three lines of the following of
dryden to the family of whiners find the workings of the passion in my
stormy soul better expressed by the three last 

 love various minds does variously inspire 
 he stirs in gentle natures gentle fires 
 like that of incense on the alter laid 

 but raging flames tempestuous souls invade 
 a fire which ev'ry windy passion blows 
 with pride it mounts and with revenge it glows 

and with revenge it shall glow for dost thou think that if it were
not from the hope that this stupid family are all combined to do my
work for me i would bear their insults is it possible to imagine 
that i would be braved as i am braved threatened as i am threatened by
those who are afraid to see me and by this brutal brother too to
whom i gave a life  a life indeed not worth my taking   had i not
a greater pride in knowing that by means of his very spy upon me i am
playing him off as i please cooling or inflaming his violent passions
as may best suit my purposes permitting so much to be revealed of my
life and actions and intentions as may give him such a confidence in
his double-faced agent as shall enable me to dance his employer upon my
own wires 

this it is that makes my pride mount above my resentment by this
engine whose springs i am continually oiling i play them all off 
the busy old tarpaulin uncle i make but my ambassador to queen anabella
howe to engage her for example-sake to her princessly daughter to
join in their cause and to assert an authority they are resolved right
or wrong or i could do nothing to maintain 

and what my motive dost thou ask no less than this that my beloved
shall find no protection out of my family for if i know hers fly she
must or have the man she hates this therefore if i take my measures
right and my familiar fail me not will secure her mine in spite of
them all in spite of her own inflexible heart mine without condition 
without reformation-promises without the necessity of a siege of years 
perhaps and to be even then after wearing the guise of merit-doubting
hypocrisy at an uncertainty upon a probation unapproved of then shall
i have all the rascals and rascalesses of the family come creeping to
me i prescribing to them and bringing that sordidly imperious brother
to kneel at the footstool of my throne 

all my fear arises from the little hold i have in the heart of this
charming frost-piece such a constant glow upon her lovely features 
eyes so sparkling limbs so divinely turned health so florid youth so
blooming air so animated to have an heart so impenetrable and i the
hitherto successful lovelace the addresser how can it be yet there
are people and i have talked with some of them who remember that
she was born her nurse norton boasts of her maternal offices in her
earliest infancy and in her education gradatim so there is full proof 
that she came not from above all at once an angel how then can she be
so impenetrable 

but here's her mistake nor will she be cured of it she takes the man
she calls her father  her mother had been faultless had she not been
her father's wife  she takes the men she calls her uncles the fellow
she calls her brother and the poor contemptible she calls her sister 
to be her father to be her uncles her brother her sister and that 
as such she owes to some of them reverence to others respect let them
treat her ever so cruelly sordid ties mere cradle prejudices for
had they not been imposed upon her by nature when she was in a perverse
humour or could she have chosen her relations would any of these have
been among them 

how my heart rises at her preference of them to me when she is
convinced of their injustice to me convinced that the alliance would
do honour to them all herself excepted to whom every one owes honour 
and from whom the most princely family might receive it but how much
more will my heart rise with indignation against her if i find she
hesitates but one moment however persecuted about preferring me to the
man she avowedly hates but she cannot surely be so mean as to purchase
her peace with them at so dear a rate she cannot give a sanction to
projects formed in malice and founded in a selfishness and that at her
own expense which she has spirit enough to despise in others and ought
to disavow that we may not think her a harlowe 

by this incoherent ramble thou wilt gather that i am not likely to come
up in haste since i must endeavour first to obtain some assurance from
the beloved of my soul that i shall not be sacrificed to such a wretch
as solmes woe be to the fair one if ever she be driven into my
power for i despair of a voluntary impulse in my favour and i find a
difficulty in obtaining this security 

that her indifference to me is not owing to the superior liking she has
for any other is what rivets my chains but take care fair one take
care o thou most exalted of female minds and loveliest of persons how
thou debasest thyself by encouraging such a competition as thy sordid
relations have set on foot in mere malice to me thou wilt say i rave 
and so i do 

 perdition catch my soul but i do love her 

else could i hear the perpetual revilings of her implacable
family else could i basely creep about not her proud father's
house but his paddock and garden walls yet a quarter of a mile
distance between us not hoping to behold the least glimpse of her
shadow else should i think myself repaid amply repaid if the
fourth fifth or sixth midnight stroll through unfrequented paths and
over briery enclosures affords me a few cold lines the even expected
purport only to let me know that she values the most worthless person
of her very worthless family more than she values me and that she
would not write at all but to induce me to bear insults which unman
me to bear my lodging in the intermediate way at a wretched alehouse 
disguised like an inmate of it accommodations equally vile as those
i met with in my westphalian journey tis well that the necessity for
all this arise not from scorn and tyranny but is first imposed upon
herself 

but was ever hero in romance fighting with giants and dragons excepted 
called upon to harder trials fortune and family and reversionary
grandeur on my side such a wretched fellow my competitor must i not
be deplorably in love that can go through these difficulties encounter
these contempts by my soul i am half ashamed of myself i who am
perjured too by priority of obligation if i am faithful to any woman
in the world 

and yet why say i i am half ashamed is it not a glory to love her
whom every one who sees her either loves or reveres or both dryden
says 

 the cause of love can never be assign'd 
 tis in no face but in the lover's mind 
 and cowley thus addresses beauty as a mere imaginary 

 beauty thou wild fantastic ape 
 who dost in ev'ry country change thy shape 
 here black there brown here tawny and there white 
 thou flatt'rer who comply'st with ev'ry sight 
 who hast no certain what nor where 

but both these had they been her contemporaries and known her would
have confessed themselves mistaken and taking together person mind 
and behaviour would have acknowledged the justice of the universal
voice in her favour 

 full many a lady
 i've ey'd with best regard and many a time
 th' harmony of their tongues hath into bondage
 brought my too-diligent ear for sev'ral virtues
 have i liked several women never any
 with so full a soul but some defect in her
 did quarrel with the noblest grace she ow'd 
 and put it to the foil but she o she 
 so perfect and so peerless is created 
 of ev'ry creature's best 

 shakesp 

thou art curious to know if i have not started a new game if it
be possible for so universal a lover to be confined so long to one
object thou knowest nothing of this charming creature that thou canst
put such questions to me or thinkest thou knowest me better than
thou dost all that's excellent in her sex is this lady until by
matrimonial or equal intimacies i have found her less than angel it is
impossible to think of any other then there are so many stimulatives
to such a spirit as mine in this affair besides love such a field of
stratagem and contrivance which thou knowest to be the delight of my
heart then the rewarding end of all to carry off such a girl as this 
in spite of all her watchful and implacable friends and in spite of a
prudence and reserve that i never met with in any of the sex what a
triumph what a triumph over the whole sex and then such a revenge to
gratify which is only at present politically reined in eventually to
break forth with greater fury is it possible thinkest thou that there
can be room for a thought that is not of her and devoted to her 


 


by the devices i have this moment received i have reason to think that
i shall have occasion for thee here hold thyself in readiness to come
down upon the first summons 

let belton and mowbray and tourville likewise prepare themselves i
have a great mind to contrive a method to send james harlowe to travel
for improvement never was there a booby squire that more wanted it 
contrive it did i say i have already contrived it could i but put
it in execution without being suspected to have a hand in it this i am
resolved upon if i have not his sister i will have him 

but be this as it may there is a present likelihood of room for
glorious mischief a confederacy had been for some time formed against
me but the uncles and the nephew are now to be double-servanted
 single-servanted they were before  and those servants are to be
double armed when they attend their masters abroad this indicates their
resolute enmity to me and as resolute favour to solmes 

the reinforced orders for this hostile apparatus are owing it seems to a
visit i made yesterday to their church a good place i thought to begin
a reconciliation in supposing the heads of the family to be christians 
and that they meant something by their prayers my hopes were to have
an invitation or at least to gain a pretence to accompany home the
gloomy sire and so get an opportunity to see my goddess for i believed
they durst not but be civil to me at least but they were filled with
terror it seems at my entrance a terror they could not get over i saw
it indeed in their countenances and that they all expected something
extraordinary to follow and so it should have done had i been more
sure than i am of their daughter's favour yet not a hair of any of
their stupid heads do i intend to hurt 

you shall all have your directions in writing if there be occasion but
after all i dare say there will be no need but to shew your faces in my
company 

such faces never could four men shew mowbray's so fierce and so
fighting belton's so pert and so pimply tourville's so fair and
so foppish thine so rough and so resolute and i your leader what
hearts although meditating hostility must those be which we shall not
appall each man occasionally attended by a servant or two long ago
chosen for qualities resembling those of his master 

thus jack as thou desirest have i written written upon something 
upon nothing upon revenge which i love upon love which i hate 
heartily hate because tis my master and upon the devil knows what
besides for looking back i am amazed at the length of it thou mayest
read it i would not for a king's ransom but so as i do but write thou
sayest thou wilt be pleased 

be pleased then i command thee to be pleased if not for the writer's
or written sake for thy word's sake and so in the royal style for am
i not likely to be thy king and thy emperor in the great affair before
us i bid thee very heartily

farewell 




letter xxxii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe tuesday march 14 


i now send you copies of my letters to my uncles with their answers be
pleased to return the latter by the first deposit i leave them for you
to make remarks upon i shall make none 


to john harlowe esq sat march 11 

allow me my honoured second papa as in my happy days you taught me
to call you to implore your interest with my papa to engage him to
dispense with a command which if insisted upon will deprive me of my
free-will and make me miserable for my whole life 

for my whole life let me repeat is that a small point my dear uncle 
to give up am not i to live with the man is any body else shall i not
therefore be allowed to judge for myself whether i can or cannot live
happily with him 

should it be ever so unhappily will it be prudence to complain or
appeal if it were to whom could i appeal with effect against a
husband and would not the invincible and avowed dislike i have for him
at setting out seem to justify any ill usage from him in that state 
were i to be ever so observant of him and if i were to be at all
observant of him it must be from fear not love 

once more let me repeat that this is not a small point to give up 
and that it is for life why i pray you good sir should i be made
miserable for life why should i be deprived of all comfort but that
which the hope that it would be a very short one would afford me 

marriage is a very solemn engagement enough to make a young creature's
heart ache with the best prospects when she thinks seriously of
it to be given up to a strange man to be engrafted into a strange
family to give up her very name as a mark of her becoming his absolute
and dependent property to be obliged to prefer this strange man to
father mother to every body and his humours to all her own or to
contend perhaps in breach of avowed duty for every innocent
instance of free-will to go no where to make acquaintance to give up
acquaintance to renounce even the strictest friendships perhaps 
all at his pleasure whether she thinks it reasonable to do so or not 
surely sir a young creature ought not to be obliged to make all these
sacrifices but for such a man as she can love if she be how sad must
be the case how miserable the life if it can be called life 

i wish i could obey you all what a pleasure would it be to me if i
could marry first and love will come after was said by one of my
dearest friends but this is a shocking assertion a thousand thing may
happen to make that state but barely tolerable where it is entered into
with mutual affections what must it then be where the husband can have
no confidence in the love of his wife but has reason rather to question
it from the preference he himself believes she would have given to
somebody else had she had her own option what doubts what jealousies 
what want of tenderness what unfavourable prepossessions will there
be in a matrimony thus circumstanced how will every look every
action even the most innocent be liable to misconstruction while 
on the other hand an indifference a carelessness to oblige may take
place and fear only can constrain even an appearance of what ought to
be the effect of undisguised love 

think seriously of these things dear good sir and represent them to
my father in that strong light which the subject will bear but in which
my sex and my tender years and inexperience will not permit me to
paint it and use your powerful interest that your poor niece may not
be consigned to a misery so durable 

i offered to engage not to marry at all if that condition may be
accepted what a disgrace is it to me to be thus sequestered from
company thus banished my papa's and mamma's presence thus slighted and
deserted by you sir and my other kind uncle and to be hindered from
attending at that public worship which were i out of the way of my
duty would be most likely to reduce me into the right path again is
this the way sir can this be thought to be the way to be taken with
a free and open spirit may not this strange method rather harden than
convince i cannot bear to live in disgrace thus the very servants so
lately permitted to be under my own direction hardly daring to speak to
me my own servant discarded with high marks of undeserved suspicion and
displeasure and my sister's maid set over me 

the matter may be too far pushed indeed it may and then perhaps 
every one will be sorry for their parts in it 

may i be permitted to mention an expedient if i am to be
watched banished and confined suppose sir it were to be at your
house  then the neighbouring gentry will the less wonder that the
person of whom they used to think so favourably appear not at church
here and that she received not their visits 

i hope there can be no objection to this you used to love to have
me with you sir when all went happily with me and will you not now
permit me in my troubles the favour of your house till all this
displeasure is overblown upon my word sir i will not stir out of
doors if you require the contrary of me nor will i see any body but
whom you will allow me to see provided mr solmes be not brought to
persecute me there 

procure then this favour for me if you cannot procure the still
greater that of a happy reconciliation which nevertheless i presume to
hope for if you will be so good as to plead for me and you will then
add to those favours and to that indulgence which have bound me and
will for ever bind me to be

your dutiful and obliged niece clarissa harlowe 


the answer


sunday night 

my dear niece 

it grieves me to be forced to deny you any thing you ask yet it must be
so for unless you can bring your mind to oblige us in this one point 
in which our promises and honour were engaged before we believed there
could be so sturdy an opposition you must never expect to be what you
have been to us all 

in short niece we are in an embattled phalanx your reading makes you
a stranger to nothing but what you should be most acquainted with so
you will see by that expression that we are not to be pierced by your
persuasions and invincible persistence we have agreed all to be
moved or none and not to comply without one another so you know your
destiny and have nothing to do but to yield to it 

let me tell you the virtue of obedience lies not in obliging when you
can be obliged again but give up an inclination and there is some
merit in that 

as to your expedient you shall not come to my house miss clary though
this is a prayer i little thought i ever should have denied you for
were you to keep your word as to seeing nobody but whom we please yet
can you write to somebody else and receive letters from him this we
too well know you can and have done more is the shame and the pity 

you offer to live single miss we wished you married but because you
may not have the man your heart is set upon why truly you will have
nobody we shall recommend and as we know that somehow or other you
correspond with him or at least did as long as you could and as he
defies us all and would not dare to do so if he were not sure of you
in spite of us all which is not a little vexatious to us you must
think we are resolved to frustrate him and triumph over him rather
than that he should triumph over us that's one word for all so expect
not any advocateship from me i will not plead for you and that's
enough from

your displeased uncle john harlowe 

p s for the rest i refer to my brother antony 


 


to antony harlowe esq saturday march 11 

honoured sir 

as you have thought fit to favour mr solmes with your particular
recommendation and was very earnest in his behalf ranking him as
you told me upon introducing him to me among your select friends and
expecting my regards to him accordingly i beg your patience while
i offer a few things out of many that i could offer to your serious
consideration on occasion of his address to me if i am to use that
word 

i am charged with prepossession in another person's favour you will be
pleased sir to remember that till my brother returned from scotland 
that other person was not absolutely discouraged nor was i forbid to
receive his visits i believe it will not be pretended that in birth 
education or personal endowments a comparison can be made between the
two and only let me ask you sir if the one would have been thought of
for me had he not made such offers as upon my word i think i ought
not in justice to accept of nor he to propose offers which if he had
not made i dare say my papa would not have required them of him 

but the one it seems has many faults is the other faultless the
principal thing objected to mr lovelace and a very inexcusable one is
that he is immoral in his loves is not the other in his hatreds nay 
as i may say in his loves too the object only differing if the love
of money be the root of all evil 

but sir if i am prepossessed what has mr solmes to hope for why
should he persevere what must i think of the man who would wish me to
be his wife against my inclination and is it not a very harsh thing
for my friends to desire to see me married to one i cannot love when
they will not be persuaded but that there is one whom i do love 

treated as i am now is the time for me to speak out or never let
me review what it is mr solmes depends upon on this occasion does he
believe that the disgrace which i supper on his account will give
him a merit with me does he think to win my esteem through my uncles'
sternness to me by my brother's contemptuous usage by my sister's
unkindness by being denied to visit or be visited and to correspond
with my chosen friend although a person of unexceptionable honour and
prudence and of my own sex my servant to be torn from me and another
servant set over me to be confined like a prisoner to narrow and
disgraceful limits in order avowedly to mortify me and to break my
spirit to be turned out of that family-management which i loved and
had the greater pleasure in it because it was an ease as i thought to
my mamma and what my sister chose not and yet though time hangs heavy
upon my hands to be so put out of my course that i have as little
inclination as liberty to pursue any of my choice delights are these
steps necessary to reduce me to a level so low as to make me a fit wife
for this man yet these are all he can have to trust to and if
his reliance is on these measures i would have him to know that
he mistakes meekness and gentleness of disposition for servility and
baseness of heart 

i beseech you sir to let the natural turn and bent of his mind and my
mind be considered what are his qualities by which he would hope to
win my esteem dear dear sir if i am to be compelled let it be in
favour of a man that can read and write that can teach me something 
for what a husband must that man make who can do nothing but command 
and needs himself the instruction he should be qualified to give 

i may be conceited sir i may be vain of my little reading of my
writing as of late i have more than once been told i am but sir the
more unequal the proposed match if so the better opinion i have of
myself the worse i must have of him and the more unfit are we for each
other 

indeed sir i must say i thought my friends had put a higher value
upon me my brother pretended once that it was owing to such value 
that mr lovelace's address was prohibited can this be and such a man
as mr solmes be intended for me 

as to his proposed settlements i hope i shall not incur your great
displeasure if i say what all who know me have reason to think and
some have upbraided me for that i despise those motives dear dear
sir what are settlements to one who has as much of her own as she
wishes for who has more in her own power as a single person than
it is probable she would be permitted to have at her disposal as a
wife whose expenses and ambition are moderate and who if she had
superfluities would rather dispense them to the necessitous than lay
them by her useless if then such narrow motives have so little weight
with me for my own benefit shall the remote and uncertain view of
family-aggrandizements and that in the person of my brother and his
descendents be thought sufficient to influence me 

has the behaviour of that brother to me of late or his consideration
for the family which had so little weight with him that he could
choose to hazard a life so justly precious as an only son's rather than
not ratify passions which he is above attempting to subdue and give me
leave to say has been too much indulged in either with regard to his
own good or the peace of any body related to him has his behaviour i
say deserved of me in particular that i should make a sacrifice of my
temporal and who knows of my eternal happiness to promote a plan
formed upon chimerical at least upon unlikely contingencies as i will
undertake to demonstrate if i may be permitted to examine it 

i am afraid you will condemn my warmth but does not the occasion
require it to the want of a greater degree of earnestness in my
opposition it seems it is owing that such advances have been made 
as have been made then dear sir allow something i beseech you for a
spirit raised and embittered by disgraces which knowing my own heart 
i am confident to say are unmerited 

but why have i said so much in answer to the supposed charge of
prepossession when i have declared to my mamma as now sir i do
to you that if it be not insisted upon that i shall marry any other
person particularly this mr solmes i will enter into any engagements
never to have the other nor any man else without their consents that
is to say without the consents of my father and my mother and of you
my uncle and my elder uncle and my cousin morden as he is one of the
trustees for my grandfather's bounty to me as to my brother indeed i
cannot say that his treatment of me has been of late so brotherly 
as to entitle him to more than civility from me and for this give me
leave to add he would be very much my debtor 

if i have not been explicit enough in declaring my dislike to mr solmes
 that the prepossession which is charged upon me may not be supposed to
influence me against him i do absolutely declare that were there no
such man as mr lovelace in the world i would not have mr solmes 
it is necessary in some one of my letters to my dear friends that i
should write so clearly as to put this matter out of all doubt and to
whom can i better address myself with an explicitness that can admit
of no mistake than to that uncle who professes the highest regard for
plain-dealing and sincerity 

let me for these reasons be still more particular in some of my
exceptions to him 

mr solmes appears to me to all the world indeed to have a very
narrow mind and no great capacity he is coarse and indelicate as
rough in his manners as in his person he is not only narrow but
covetous being possessed of great wealth he enjoys it not nor has the
spirit to communicate to a distress of any kind does not his own sister
live unhappily for want of a little of his superfluities and suffers
not he his aged uncle the brother of his own mother to owe to
the generosity of strangers the poor subsistence he picks up from
half-a-dozen families you know sir my open free communicative
temper how unhappy must i be circumscribed in his narrow selfish
circle out of which being with-held by this diabolical parsimony he
dare no more stir than a conjurer out of his nor would let me 

such a man as this love yes perhaps he may my grandfather's
estate which he has told several persons and could not resist hinting
the same thing tome with that sort of pleasure which a low mind takes 
when it intimates its own interest as a sufficient motive for it to
expect another's favour lies so extremely convenient for him that it
would double the value of a considerable part of his own that estate 
and an alliance which would do credit to his obscurity and narrowness 
they make him think he can love and induce him to believe he does but
at most he is but a second-place love riches were are and always
will be his predominant passion his were left him by a miser on this
very account and i must be obliged to forego all the choice delights
of my life and be as mean as he or else be quite unhappy pardon sir 
this severity of expression one is apt to say more than one would of
a person one dislikes when more is said in his favour than he can
possibly deserve and when he is urged to my acceptance with so much
vehemence that there is no choice left me 

whether these things be perfectly so or not while i think they are 
it is impossible i should ever look upon mr solmes in the light he is
offered to me nay were he to be proved ten times better than i have
represented him and sincerely think him yet would he be still ten
times more disagreeable to me than any other man i know in the world 
let me therefore beseech you sir to become an advocate for your niece 
that she may not be made a victim to a man so highly disgustful to her 

you and my other uncle can do a great deal for me if you please with
my papa be persuaded sir that i am not governed by obstinacy in this
case but by aversion an aversion i cannot overcome for if i have but
endeavoured to reason with myself out of regard to the duty i owe
to my father's will my heart has recoiled and i have been averse to
myself for offering but to argue with myself in behalf of a man who 
in the light he appears to me has no one merit and who knowing this
aversion could not persevere as he does if he had the spirit of a man 

if sir you can think of the contents of this letter reasonable i
beseech you to support them with your interest if not i shall be most
unhappy nevertheless it is but just in me so to write as that mr 
solmes may know what he has to trust to 

forgive dear sir this tedious letter and suffer it to have weight
with you and you will for ever oblige

your dutiful and affectionate niece 

cl harlowe 


 


mr antony harlowe to miss cl harlowe

niece clary 

you had better not write to us or to any of us to me particularly 
you had better never to have set pen to paper on the subject whereon
you have written he that is first in his own cause saith the wise man 
seemeth just but his neighbour cometh and searcheth him and so in
this respect i will be your neighbour for i will search your heart to
the bottom that is to say if your letter be written from your heart 
yet do i know what a task i have undertaken because of the knack you
are noted for at writing but in defence of a father's authority in
behalf of the good and honour and prosperity of the family one comes
of what a hard thing it would be if one could not beat down all the
arguments a rebel child how loth i am to write down that word of miss
clary harlowe can bring in behalf of her obstinacy 

in the first place don't you declare and that contrary to your
declarations to your mother remember that girl that you prefer the
man we all hate and who hates us as bad then what a character have
you given of a worthy man i wonder you dare write so freely of one we
all respect but possibly it may be for that very reason 

how you begin your letter because i value mr solmes as my friend you
treat him the worse that's the plain dunstable of the matter miss i
am not such a fool but i can see that and so a noted whoremonger is
to be chosen before a man who is a money-lover let me tell you niece 
this little becomes so nice a one as you have been always reckoned who 
think you does more injustice a prodigal man or a saving man the one
saves his own money the other spends other people's but your favourite
is a sinner in grain and upon record 

the devil's in your sex god forgive me for saying so the nicest of
them will prefer a vile rake and wh i suppose i must not repeat the
word the word will offend when the vicious denominated by that word
will be chosen i had not been a bachelor to this time if i had not
seen such a mass of contradictions in you all such gnat-strainers and
camel-swallowers as venerable holy writ has it 

what names will perverseness call things by a prudent man who intends
to be just to every body is a covetous man while a vile profligate
rake is christened with the appellation of a gallant man and a polite
man i'll warrant you 

it is my firm opinion lovelace would not have so much regard for you
as he professes but for two reasons and what are these why out of
spite to all of us one of them the other because of your independent
fortune i wish your good grandfather had not left what he did so much
in your own power as i may say but little did he imagine his beloved
grand-daughter would have turned upon all her friends as she has done 

what has mr solmes to hope for if you are prepossessed hey-day 
is this you cousin clary has he then nothing to hope for from your
father's and mother's and our recommendations no nothing at all it
seems o brave i should think that this with a dutiful child as we
took you to be was enough depending on this your duty we proceeded 
and now there is no help for it for we will not be balked neither
shall our friend mr solmes i can tell you that 

if your estate is convenient for him what then does that pert cousin 
make it out that he does not love you he had need to expect some good
with you that has so little good to hope for from you mind that but
pray is not this estate our estate as we may say have we not all an
interest in it and a prior right if right were to have taken place 
and was it not more than a good old man's dotage god rest his soul 
that gave it you before us all well then ought we not to have a
choice who shall have it in marriage with you and would you have the
conscience to wish us to let a vile fellow who hates us all run away
with it you bid me weigh what you write do you weigh this girl and
it will appear we have more to say for ourselves than you was aware of 

as to your hard treatment as you call it thank yourself for that it
may be over when you will so i reckon nothing upon that you was not
banished and confined till all entreaty and fair speeches were tried
with you mind that and mr solmes can't help your obstinacy let that
be observed too 

as to being visited and visiting you never was fond of either so
that's a grievance put into the scale to make weight as to disgrace 
that's as bad to us as to you so fine a young creature so much as we
used to brag of you too and besides this is all in your power as the
rest 

but your heart recoils when you would persuade yourself to obey your
parent finely described is it not too truly described i own as you
go on i know that you may love him if you will i had a good mind to
bid you hate him then perhaps you would like him the better for i
have always found a most horrid romantic perverseness in your sex to
do and to love what you should not is meat drink and vesture to you
all 

i am absolutely of your brother's mind that reading and writing though
not too much for the wits of you young girls are too much for your
judgments you say you may be conceited cousin you may be vain and
so you are to despise this gentleman as you do he can read and write
as well as most gentlemen i can tell you that who told you mr solmes
cannot read and write but you must have a husband who can learn
you something i wish you knew but your duty as well as you do your
talents that niece you have of late days to learn and mr solmes
will therefore find something to instruct you in i will not shew him
this letter of yours though you seem to desire it lest it should
provoke him to be too severe a schoolmaster when you are his'n 

but now i think of it suppose you are the reader at your pen than
he you will make the more useful wife to him won't you for who so
good an economist as you and you may keep all of his accounts 
and save yourselves a steward and let me tell you this is a fine
advantage in a family for those stewards are often sad dogs and creep
into a man's estate before he knows where he is and not seldom is he
forced to pay them interest for his own money 

i know not why a good wife should be above these things it is better
than lying a-bed half the day and junketing and card-playing all the
night and making yourselves wholly useless to every good purpose in
your own families as is now the fashion among ye the duce take you all
that do so say i only that thank my stars i am a bachelor 

then this is a province you are admirably versed in you grieve that
it is taken from you here you know so here miss with mr solmes you
will have something to keep account of for the sake of you and your
children with the other perhaps you will have an account to keep 
too but an account of what will go over the left shoulder only of what
he squanders what he borrows and what he owes and never will pay 
come come cousin you know nothing of the world a man's a man and
you may have many partners in a handsome man and costly ones too who
may lavish away all you save mr solmes therefore for my money and i
hope for yours 

but mr solmes is a coarse man he is not delicate enough for your
niceness because i suppose he dresses not like a fop and a coxcomb and
because he lays not himself out in complimental nonsense the poison of
female minds he is a man of sense that i can tell you no man
talks more to the purpose to us but you fly him so that he has no
opportunity given him to express it to you and a man who loves if he
have ever so much sense looks a fool especially when he is despised 
and treated as you treated him the last time he was in your company 

as to his sister she threw herself away as you want to do against his
full warning for he told her what she had to trust to if she married
where she did marry and he was as good as his word and so an honest
man ought offences against warning ought to be smarted for take care
this be not your case mind that 

his uncle deserves no favour from him for he would have circumvented
mr solmes and got sir oliver to leave to himself the estate he had
always designed for him his nephew and brought him up in the hope of
it too ready forgiveness does but encourage offences that's your good
father's maxim and there would not be so many headstrong daughters as
there are if this maxim were kept in mind punishments are of service
to offenders rewards should be only to the meriting and i think the
former are to be dealt out rigourously in willful cases 

as to his love he shews it but too much for your deservings as they
have been of late let me tell you that and this is his misfortune and
may in time perhaps be yours 

as to his parsimony which you wickedly call diabolical  a very free
word in your mouth let me tell ye  little reason have you of all
people for this on whom he proposes of his own accord to settle all
he has in the world a proof let him love riches as he will that he
loves you better but that you may be without excuse on this score 
we will tie him up to your own terms and oblige him by the
marriage-articles to allow you a very handsome quarterly sum to do what
you please with and this has been told you before and i have said it
to mrs howe that good and worthy lady before her proud daughter that
you might hear of it again 

to contradict the charge of prepossession to lovelace you offer never
to have him without our consents and what is this saying but that you
will hope on for our consents and to wheedle and tire us out then he
will always be in expectation while you are single and we are to live
on at this rate are we vexed by you and continually watchful about
you and as continually exposed to his insolence and threats remember
last sunday girl what might have happened had your brother and he
met moreover you cannot do with such a spirit as his as you can with
worthy mr solmes the one you make tremble the other will make
you quake mind that and you will not be able to help yourself and
remember that if there should be any misunderstanding between one of
them and you we should all interpose and with effect no doubt but
with the other it would be self-do self-have and who would either
care or dare to put in a word for you nor let the supposition of
matrimonial differences frighten you honey-moon lasts not now-a-days
above a fortnight and dunmow flitch as i have been informed was never
claimed though some say once it was marriage is a queer state child 
whether paired by the parties or by their friends out of three brothers
of us you know there was but one had courage to marry and why was it 
do you think we were wise by other people's experience 

don't despise money so much you may come to know the value of it that
is a piece of instruction that you are to learn and which according to
your own notions mr solmes will be able to teach you 

i do indeed condemn your warmth i will not allow for disgraces you
bring upon yourself if i thought them unmerited i would be your
advocate but it was always my notion that children should not dispute
their parents' authority when your grandfather left his estate to you 
though his three sons and a grandson and your elder sister were in
being we all acquiesced and why because it was our father's doing do
you imitate that example if you will not those who set it you have the
more reason to hold you inexcusable mind that cousin 

you mention your brother too scornfully and in your letter to him are
very disrespectful and so indeed you are to your sister in the letter
you wrote to her your brother madam is your brother and third older
than yourself and a man and pray be so good as not to forget what is
due to a brother who next to us three brothers is the head of the
family and on whom the name depends as upon your dutiful compliance
laid down for the honour of the family you are come of and pray now let
me ask you if the honour of that will not be an honour to you if you
don't think so the more unworthy you you shall see the plan if you
promise not to be prejudiced against it right or wrong if you are not
besotted to that man i am sure you will like it if you are were mr 
solmes an angel it would signify nothing for the devil is love and
love is the devil when it gets into any of your heads many examples
have i seen of that 

if there were no such man as lovelace in the world you would not have
mr solmes you would not miss very pretty truly we see how your
spirit is embittered indeed wonder not since it is come to your will
not's that those who have authority over you say you shall have the
other and i am one mind that and if it behoves you to speak out 
miss it behoves us not to speak in what's sauce for the goose is sauce
for the gander take that in your thought too 

i humbly apprehend that mr solmes has the spirit of a man and a
gentleman i would admonish you therefore not to provoke it he pities
you as much as he loves you he says he will convince you of his love
by deeds since he is not permitted by you to express it by words and
all his dependence is upon your generosity hereafter we hope he may
depend upon that we encourage him to think he may and this heartens
him up so that you may lay his constancy at your parents' and your
uncles' doors and this will be another mark of your duty you know 

you must be sensible that you reflect upon your parents and all of
us when you tell me you cannot in justice accept of the settlements
proposed to you this reflection we should have wondered at from you
once but now we don't 

there are many other very censurable passages in this free letter of
yours but we must place them to the account of your embittered spirit 
i am glad you mentioned that word because we should have been at a
loss what to have called it i should much rather nevertheless have had
reason to give it a better name 

i love you dearly still miss i think you though my niece one of the
finest young gentlewomen i ever saw but upon my conscience i think
you ought to obey your parents and oblige me and my brother john 
for you know very well that we have nothing but your good at heart 
consistently indeed with the good and honour of all of us what must we
think of any one of it who would not promote the good of the whole 
and who would set one part of it against another which god forbid say
i you see i am for the good of all what shall i get by it let things
go as they will do i want any thing of any body for my own sake does
my brother john well then cousin clary what would you be at as i
may say 

o but you can't love mr solmes but i say you know not what you
can do you encourage yourself in your dislike you permit your heart
 little did i think it was such a froward one to recoil take it to
task niece drive it on as fast as it recoils  we do so in all our
sea-fights and land-fights too by our sailors and soldiers or we
should not conquer  and we are all sure you will overcome it and why 
because you ought so we think whatever you think and whose thoughts
are to be preferred you may be wittier than we but if you were wiser 
we have lived some of us let me tell you to very little purpose 
thirty or forty years longer than you 

i have written as long a letter as yours i may not write in so lively 
or so polite a style as my niece but i think i have all the argument
on my side and you will vastly oblige me if you will shew me by your
compliance with all our desires that you think so too if you do not 
you must not expect an advocate or even a friend in me dearly as i
love you for then i shall be sorry to be called

your uncle ant harlowe 

tuesday two in the morning postscript 

you must send me no more letters but a compliable one you may send 
but i need not have forbid you for i am sure this by fair argument 
is unanswerable i know it is i have written day and night i may say 
ever since sunday morning only church-time or the like of that but
this is the last i can tell you from

ant h 




letter xxxiii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday march 16 


having met with such bad success in my application to my relations i
have taken a step that will surprise you it is no other than writing
a letter to mr solmes himself i sent it and have his answer he had
certainly help in it for i have seen a letter of his and indifferently
worded as poorly spelt yet the superscription is of his dictating 
i dare say for he is a formal wretch with these i shall enclose one
from my brother to me on occasion of mine to mr solmes i did think
that it was possible to discourage the man from proceeding and if i
could have done that it would have answered all my wishes it was worth
the trial but you'll see nothing will do my brother has taken his
measures too securely 


to roger solmes esq wednesday march 15 

sir 

you will wonder to receive a letter from me and more still at the
uncommon subject of it but the necessity of the case will justify me 
at least in my own apprehension and i shall therefore make no other
apology for it 

when you first came acquainted with our family you found the writer of
this one of the happiest creatures in the world beloved by the best
and most indulgent of parents and rejoicing in the kind favour of two
affectionate uncles and in the esteem of every one 

but how is this scene now changed you was pleased to cast a favourable
eye upon me you addressed yourself to my friends your proposals were
approved of by them approved of without consulting me as if my choice
and happiness were of the least signification those who had a right to
all reasonable obedience from me insisted upon it without reserve 
i had not the felicity to think as they did almost the first time my
sentiments differed from theirs i besought them to indulge me in a
point so important to my future happiness but alas in vain and then
 for i thought it was but honest i told you my mind and even that
my affections were engaged but to my mortification and surprise you
persisted and still persist 

the consequence of all is too grievous for me to repeat you who have
such free access to the rest of the family know it too well too well
you know it either for the credit of your own generosity or for my
reputation i am used on your account as i never before was used and
never before was thought to deserve to be used and this was the hard 
the impossible condition of their returning favour that i must prefer
a man to all others that of all others i cannot prefer 

thus distressed and made unhappy and all to your sake and through
your cruel perseverance i write sir to demand of you the peace of
mind you have robbed me of to demand of you the love of so many dear
friends of which you have deprived me and if you have the generosity
that should distinguish a man and a gentleman to adjure you not to
continue an address that has been attended with such cruel effects to
the creature you profess to esteem 

if you really value me as my friends would make me believe and as you
have declared you do must it not be a mean and selfish value a value
that can have no merit with the unhappy object of it because it is
attended with effects so grievous to her it must be for your own sake
only not for mine and even in this point you must be mistaken for 
would a prudent man wish to marry one who has not a heart to give who
cannot esteem him who therefore must prove a bad wife and how cruel
would it be to make a poor creature a bad wife whose pride it would be
to make a good one 

if i am capable of judging our tempers and inclinations are vastly
different any other of my sex will make you happier than i can the
treatment i meet with and the obstinacy as it is called with which i
support myself under it ought to convince you of this were i not able
to give so good a reason for this my supposed perverseness as that i
cannot consent to marry a man whom i cannot value 

but if sir you have not so much generosity in your value for me as
to desist for my own sake let me conjure you by the regard due to
yourself and to your own future happiness to discontinue your suit 
and place your affections on a worthier object for why should you make
me miserable and yourself not happy by this means you will do all that
is now in your power to restore to me the affection of my friends and 
if that can be it will leave me in as happy a state as you found me
in you need only to say that you see there are no hopes as you will
perhaps complaisantly call it of succeeding with me  and indeed sir 
there cannot be a greater truth  and that you will therefore no more
think of me but turn your thoughts another way 

your compliance with this request will lay me under the highest
obligation to your generosity and make me ever

your well-wisher and humble servant clarissa harlowe 



to miss clarissa harlowe these most humbly present 

dearest miss 

your letter has had a very contrary effect upon me to what you seem to
have expected from it it has doubly convinced me of the excellency of
your mind and of the honour of your disposition call it selfish or
what you please i must persist in my suit and happy shall i be if by
patience and perseverance and a steady and unalterable devoir i may at
last overcome the difficulty laid in my way 

as your good parents your uncles and other friends are absolutely
determined you shall never have mr lovelace if they can help it and
as i presume no other person is in the way i will contentedly wait the
issue of this matter and forgive me dearest miss but a person should
sooner persuade me to give up to him my estate as an instance of my
generosity because he could not be happy without it than i would a
much more valuable treasure to promote the felicity of another and
make his way easier to circumvent myself 

pardon me dear miss but i must persevere though i am sorry you suffer
on my account as you are pleased to think for i never before saw the
woman i could love and while there is any hope and that you remain
undisposed of to some happier man i must and will be

your faithful and obsequious admirer roger solmes 

march 16 


 


mr james harlowe to miss cl harlowe march 16 

what a fine whim you took into your head to write a letter to mr 
solmes to persuade him to give up his pretensions to you of all the
pretty romantic flights you have delighted in this was certainly one
of the most extraordinary but to say nothing of what fires us all with
indignation against you your owning your prepossession in a villain's
favour and your impertinence to me and your sister and your uncles 
one of which has given it you home child how can you lay at mr 
solmes's door the usage you so bitterly complain of you know little
fool as you are that it is your fondness for lovelace that has brought
upon you all these things and which would have happened whether mr 
solmes had honoured you with his addresses or not 

as you must needs know this to be true consider pretty witty miss if
your fond love-sick heart can let you consider what a fine figure all
your expostulations with us and charges upon mr solmes make with
what propriety do you demand of him to restore to you your former
happiness as you call it and merely call it for if you thought our
favour so you would restore it to yourself since it is yet in your
own power to do so therefore miss pert none of your pathetics except
in the right place depend upon it whether you have mr solmes or not 
you shall never have your heart's delight the vile rake lovelace if
our parents if our uncles if i can hinder it no you fallen angel 
you shall not give your father and mother such a son nor me such a
brother in giving yourself that profligate wretch for a husband and so
set your heart at rest and lay aside all thoughts of him if ever you
expect forgiveness reconciliation or a kind opinion from any of your
family but especially from him who at present styles himself

your brother james harlowe 

p s i know your knack at letter-writing if you send me an answer
for this i will return it unopened for i will not argue with your
perverseness in so plain a case only once for all i was willing to put
you right as to mr solmes whom i think to blame to trouble his head
about you 




letter xxxiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq friday march 17 


i receive with great pleasure the early and cheerful assurances of
your loyalty and love and let our principal and most trusty friends
named in my last know that i do 

i would have thee jack come down as soon as thou canst i believe i
shall not want the others so soon yet they may come down to lord m s 
i will be there if not to receive them to satisfy my lord that there
is no new mischief in hand which will require his second intervention 

for thyself thou must be constantly with me not for my security the
family dare do nothing but bully they bark only at a distance but
for my entertainment that thou mayest from the latin and the english
classics keep my lovesick soul from drooping 

thou hadst best come to me here in thy old corporal's coat thy servant
out of livery and to be upon a familiar footing with me as a distant
relation to be provided for by thy interest above i mean not in
heaven thou mayest be sure thou wilt find me at a little alehouse 
they call it an inn the white hart most terribly wounded but by
the weather only the sign in a sorry village within five miles from
harlowe-place every body knows harlowe-place for like versailles it
is sprung up from a dunghill within every elderly person's remembrance 
every poor body particularly knows it but that only for a few years
past since a certain angel has appeared there among the sons and
daughters of men 

the people here at the hart are poor but honest and have gotten it
into their heads that i am a man of quality in disguise and there is
no reining-in their officious respect here is a pretty little
smirking daughter seventeen six days ago i call her my rose-bud her
grandmother for there is no mother a good neat old woman as ever
filled a wicker chair in a chimney-corner has besought me to be
merciful to her 

this is the right way with me many and many a pretty rogue had i
spared whom i did not spare had my power been acknowledged and my
mercy in time implored but the debellare superbos should be my motto 
were i to have a new one 

this simple chit for there is a simplicity in her thou wouldst be
highly pleased with all humble all officious all innocent i love her
for her humility her officiousness and even for her innocence will be
pretty amusement to thee while i combat with the weather and dodge and
creep about the walls and purlieus of harlowe-place thou wilt see in
her mind all that her superiors have been taught to conceal in order
to render themselves less natural and of consequence less pleasing 

but i charge thee that thou do not what i would not permit myself to
do for the world i charge thee that thou do not crop my rose-bud she
is the only flower of fragrance that has blown in this vicinage for ten
years past or will for ten years to come for i have looked backward
to the have-been's and forward to the will-be's having but too much
leisure upon my hands in my present waiting 

i never was so honest for so long together since my matriculation it
behoves me so to be some way or other my recess at this little inn may
be found out and it will then be thought that my rose-bud has attracted
me a report in my favour from simplicities so amiable may establish
me for the grandmother's relation to my rose-bud may be sworn to and
the father is an honest poor man has no joy but in his rose-bud o
jack spare thou therefore for i shall leave thee often alone with
her spare thou my rose-bud let the rule i never departed from but
it cost me a long regret be observed to my rose-bud never to ruin a
poor girl whose simplicity and innocence were all she had to trust to 
and whose fortunes were too low to save her from the rude contempts of
worse minds than her own and from an indigence extreme such a one will
only pine in secret and at last perhaps in order to refuge herself
from slanderous tongues and virulence be induced to tempt some
guilty stream or seek her end in the knee-encircling garter that
peradventure was the first attempt of abandoned love no defiances
will my rose-bud breathe no self-dependent thee-doubting watchfulness
 indirectly challenging thy inventive machinations to do their worst 
will she assume unsuspicious of her danger the lamb's throat will
hardly shun thy knife o be not thou the butcher of my lambkin 

the less thou be so for the reason i am going to give thee the gentle
heart is touched by love her soft bosom heaves with a passion she
has not yet found a name for i once caught her eye following a young
carpenter a widow neighbour's son living  to speak in her dialect  at
the little white house over the way a gentle youth he also seems to be 
about three years older than herself playmates from infancy till
his eighteenth and her fifteenth year furnished a reason for a greater
distance in shew while their hearts gave a better for their being
nearer than ever for i soon perceived the love reciprocal a scrape and
a bow at first seeing his pretty mistress turning often to salute her
following eye and when a winding lane was to deprive him of her sight 
his whole body turned round his hat more reverently doffed than before 
this answered for unseen i was behind her by a low courtesy and
a sigh that johnny was too far off to hear happy whelp said i to
myself i withdrew and in tript my rose-bud as if satisfied with the
dumb shew and wishing nothing beyond it 

i have examined the little heart she has made me her confidant she
owns she could love johnny barton very well and johnny barton has told
her he could love her better than any maiden he ever saw but alas 
it must not be thought of why not be thought of she don't know and
then she sighed but johnny has an aunt who will give him an hundred
pounds when his time is out and her father cannot give her but a few
things or so to set her out with and though johnny's mother says she
knows not where johnny would have a prettier or notabler wife yet and
then she sighed again what signifies talking i would not have johnny
be unhappy and poor for me for what good would that do me you know 
sir 

what would i give  by my soul my angel will indeed reform me if her
friends' implacable folly ruin us not both what would i give  to have
so innocent and so good a heart as either my rose-bud's or johnny's 

i have a confounded mischievous one by nature too i think a good
motion now-and-then rises from it but it dies away presently a love
of intrigue an invention for mischief a triumph in subduing fortune
encouraging and supporting and a constitution what signifies
palliating but i believe i had been a rogue had i been a plough-boy 

but the devil's in this sex eternal misguiders who that has once
trespassed with them ever recovered his virtue and yet where there is
not virtue which nevertheless we freelivers are continually plotting
to destroy what is there even in the ultimate of our wishes with
them preparation and expectation are in a manner every thing 
reflection indeed may be something if the mind be hardened above
feeling the guilt of a past trespass but the fruition what is there in
that and yet that being the end nature will not be satisfied without
it 

see what grave reflections an innocent subject will produce it gives
me some pleasure to think that it is not out of my power to reform 
but then jack i am afraid i must keep better company than i do at
present for we certainly harden one another but be not cast down my
boy there will be time enough to give the whole fraternity warning to
choose another leader and i fancy thou wilt be the man 

mean time as i make it my rule whenever i have committed a very
capital enormity to do some good by way of atonement and as i believe
i am a pretty deal indebted on that score i intend before i leave
these parts successfully shall i leave them i hope or i shall be
tempted to double the mischief by way of revenge though not to my
rose-bud any to join an hundred pounds to johnny's aunt's hundred
pounds to make one innocent couple happy i repeat therefore and for
half a dozen more therefores spare thou my rose-bud 

an interruption another letter anon and both shall go together 




letter xxxv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


i have found out by my watchful spy almost as many of my charmer's
motions as those of the rest of her relations it delights me to think
how the rascal is caressed by the uncles and nephew and let into their
secrets yet it proceeds all the time by my line of direction i have
charged him however on forfeiture of his present weekly stipend and
my future favour to take care that neither my beloved nor any of
the family suspect him i have told him that he may indeed watch her
egresses and regresses but that only keep off other servants from her
paths yet not to be seen by her himself 

the dear creature has tempted him he told them with a bribe  which she
never offered  to convey a letter  which she never wrote  to miss howe 
he believes with one enclosed perhaps to me but he declined it and
he begged they would take notice of it to her this brought him a stingy
shilling great applause and an injunction followed it to all the
servants for the strictest look-out lest she should contrive some way
to send it and above an hour after an order was given him to throw
himself in her way and expressing his concern for denying her request 
to tender his service to her and to bring them her letter which it
will be proper for him to report that she has refused to give him 

now seest thou not how many good ends this contrivance answers 

in the first place the lady is secured by it against her own
knowledge in the liberty allowed her of taking her private walks in the
garden for this attempt has confirmed them in their belief that now
they have turned off her maid she has no way to send a letter out of
the house if she had she would not have run the risque of tempting
a fellow who had not been in her secret so that she can prosecute
unsuspectedly her correspondence with me and miss howe 

in the next place it will perhaps afford me an opportunity of a private
interview with her which i am meditating let her take it as she will 
having found out by my spy who can keep off every body else that
she goes every morning and evening to a wood-house remote from the
dwelling-house under pretence of visiting and feeding a set of
bantam-poultry which were produced from a breed that was her
grandfather's and of which for that reason she is very fond as also of
some other curious fowls brought from the same place i have an account
of all her motions here and as she has owned to me in one of her
letters that she corresponds privately with miss howe i presume it is
by this way 

the interview i am meditating will produce her consent i hope to
other favours of the like kind for should she not choose the place
in which i am expecting to see her i can attend her any where in the
rambling dutch-taste garden whenever she will permit me that honour 
for my implement high joseph leman has procured me the opportunity of
getting two keys made to the garden-door one of which i have given him
for reasons good which door opens to the haunted coppice as tradition
has made the servants think it a man having been found hanging in it
about twenty years ago and joseph upon proper notice will leave it
unbolted 

but i was obliged previously to give him my honour that no mischief
should happen to any of my adversaries from this liberty for the
fellow tells me that he loves all his masters and only that he knows
i am a man of honour and that my alliance will do credit to the family 
and after prejudices are overcome every body will think so or he would
not for the world act the part he does 

there never was a rogue who had not a salvo to himself for being
so what a praise to honesty that every man pretends to it even at
the instant that he knows he is pursuing the methods that will perhaps
prove him a knave to the whole world as well as to his own conscience 

but what this stupid family can mean to make all this necessary i
cannot imagine my revenge and my love are uppermost by turns if
the latter succeed not the gratifying of the former will be my only
consolation and by all that's good they shall feel it although for
it i become an exile from my native country for ever 

i will throw myself into my charmer's presence i have twice already
attempted it in vain i shall then see what i may depend upon from her
favour if i thought i had no prospect of that i should be tempted to
carry her off that would be a rape worthy of jupiter 

but all gentle shall be my movements all respectful even to reverence 
my address to her her hand shall be the only witness to the pressure
of my lip my trembling lip i know it will tremble if i do not bid
it tremble as soft my sighs as the sighs of my gentle rose-bud by my
humility will i invite her confidence the loneliness of the place shall
give me no advantage to dissipate her fears and engage her reliance
upon my honour for the future shall be my whole endeavour but
little will i complain of not at all will i threaten those who are
continually threatening me but yet with a view to act the part of
dryden's lion to secure my love or to let loose my vengeance upon my
hunters 

 what tho' his mighty soul his grief contains 
 he meditates revenge who least complains 
 and like a lion slumb'ring in his way 
 or sleep dissembling while he waits his prey 
 his fearless foes within his distance draws 
 constrains his roaring and contracts his paws 
 till at the last his time for fury found 
 he shoots with sudden vengeance from the ground 
 the prostrate vulgar passes o'er and spares 
 but with a lordly rage his hunter tears 




letter xxxvi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe saturday march 18 


i have been frighted out of my wits still am in a manner out of
breath thus occasioned i went down under the usual pretence in
hopes to find something from you concerned at my disappointment i was
returning from the wood-house when i heard a rustling as of somebody
behind a stack of wood i was extremely surprised but still more to
behold a man coming from behind the furthermost stack oh thought i at
that moment the sin of a prohibited correspondence 

in the same point of time that i saw him he besought me not to be
frighted and still nearer approaching me threw open a horseman's
coat and who should it be but mr lovelace i could not scream out
 yet attempted to scream the moment i saw a man and again when i saw
who it was for i had no voice and had i not caught hold of a prop
which supported the old roof i should have sunk 

i had hitherto as you know kept him at a distance and now as i
recovered myself judge of my first emotions when i recollected his
character from every mouth of my family his enterprising temper and
found myself alone with him in a place so near a bye-lane and so
remote from the house 

but his respectful behaviour soon dissipated these fears and gave me
others lest we should be seen together and information of it given to
my brother the consequences of which i could readily think would be 
if not further mischief an imputed assignation a stricter confinement 
a forfeited correspondence with you my beloved friend and a pretence
for the most violent compulsion and neither the one set of reflections 
nor the other acquitted him to me for his bold intrusion 

as soon therefore as i could speak i expressed with the greatest warmth
my displeasure and told him that he cared not how much he exposed me
to the resentment of all my friends provided he could gratify his own
impetuous humour i then commanded him to leave the place that moment 
and was hurrying from him when he threw himself in the way at my feet 
beseeching my stay for one moment declaring that he suffered himself
to be guilty of this rashness as i thought it to avoid one much
greater for in short he could not bear the hourly insults he
received from my family with the thoughts of having so little interest
in my favour that he could not promise himself that his patience and
forbearance would be attended with any other issue than to lose me for
ever and be triumphed over and insulted upon it 

this man you know has very ready knees you have said that he ought 
in small points frequently to offend on purpose to shew what an
address he is master of 

he ran on expressing his apprehensions that a temper so gentle and
obliging as he said mine was to every body but him and a dutifulness
so exemplary inclined me to do my part to others whether they did
theirs or not by me would be wrought upon in favour of a man set up in
part to be revenged upon myself for my grandfather's envied distinction
of me and in part to be revenged upon him for having given life to
one who would have taken his and now sought to deprive him of hopes
dearer to him than life 

i told him he might be assured that the severity and ill-usage i
met with would be far from effecting the proposed end that although i
could with great sincerity declare for a single life which had always
been my choice and particularly that if ever i married if they would
not insist upon the man i had an aversion to it should not be with the
man they disliked 

he interrupted me here he hoped i would forgive him for it but
he could not help expressing his great concern that after so many
instances of his passionate and obsequious devotion 

and pray sir said i let me interrupt you in my turn why don't you
assert in still plainer words the obligation you have laid me under by
this your boasted devotion why don't you let me know in terms as high
as your implication that a perseverance i have not wished for which
has set all my relations at variance with me is a merit that throws
upon me the guilt of ingratitude for not having answered it as you seem
to expect 

i must forgive him he said if he who pretended only to a comparative
merit and otherwise thought no man living could deserve me had
presumed to hope for a greater share in my favour than he had hitherto
met with when such men as mr symmes mr wyerley and now lastly so
vile a reptile as this solmes however discouraged by myself were made
his competitors as to the perseverance i mentioned it was impossible
for him not to persevere but i must needs know that were he not in
being the terms solmes had proposed were such as would have involved
me in the same difficulties with my relations that i now laboured under 
he therefore took the liberty to say that my favour to him far from
increasing those difficulties would be the readiest way to extricate me
from them they had made it impossible  he told me with too much truth 
to oblige them any way but by sacrificing myself to solmes they were
well apprized besides of the difference between the two one whom they
hoped to manage as they pleased the other who could and would protect
me from every insult and who had natural prospects much superior to my
brother's foolish views of a title 

how comes this man to know so well all our foibles but i more wonder 
how he came to have a notion of meeting me in this place 

i was very uneasy to be gone and the more as the night came on apace 
but there was no getting from him till i had heard a great deal more of
what he had to say 

as he hoped that i would one day make him the happiest man in the
world he assured me that he had so much regard for my fame that he
would be as far from advising any step that was likely to cast a shade
upon my reputation although that step was to be ever so much in his
own favour as i would be to follow such advice but since i was not
to be permitted to live single he would submit it to my consideration 
whether i had any way but one to avoid the intended violence to my
inclinations my father so jealous of his authority both my uncles in
my father's way of thinking my cousin morden at a distance my uncle
and aunt hervey awed into insignificance was his word my brother and
sister inflaming every one solmes's offers captivating miss howe's
mother rather of a party with them for motives respecting example to
her own daughter 

and then he asked me if i would receive a letter from lady betty
lawrance on this occasion for lady sarah sadleir he said having
lately lost her only child hardly looked into the world or thought of
it farther than to wish him married and preferably to all the women in
the world with me 

to be sure my dear there is a great deal in what the man said i may
be allowed to say this without an imputed glow or throb but i told
him nevertheless that although i had great honour for the ladies he
was related to yet i should not choose to receive a letter on a subject
that had a tendency to promote an end i was far from intending to
promote that it became me ill as i was treated at present to hope
every thing to bear every thing and to try ever thing when my father
saw my steadfastness and that i would die rather than have mr solmes 
he would perhaps recede 

interrupting me he represented the unlikelihood there was of that 
from the courses they had entered upon which he thus enumerated their
engaging mrs howe against me in the first place as a person i might
have thought to fly to if pushed to desperation my brother continually
buzzing in my father's ears that my cousin morden would soon arrive 
and then would insist upon giving me possession of my grandfather's
estate in pursuance of the will which would render me independent
of my father their disgraceful confinement of me their dismissing so
suddenly my servant and setting my sister's over me their engaging my
mother contrary to her own judgment against me these he said were
all so many flagrant proofs that they would stick at nothing to carry
their point and were what made him inexpressibly uneasy 

he appealed to me whether ever i knew my father recede from any
resolution he had once fixed especially if he thought either
his prerogative or his authority concerned in the question his
acquaintance with our family he said enabled him to give several
instances but they would be too grating to me of an arbitrariness
that had few examples even in the families of princes an arbitrariness 
which the most excellent of women my mother too severely experienced 
he was proceeding as i thought with reflections of this sort and i
angrily told him i would not permit my father to be reflected upon 
adding that his severity to me however unmerited was not a warrant
for me to dispense with my duty to him 

he had no pleasure he said in urging any thing that could be so
construed for however well warranted he was to make such reflections
from the provocations they were continually giving him he knew how
offensive to me any liberties of this sort would be and yet he must
own that it was painful to him who had youth and passions to be
allowed for as well as others and who had always valued himself under
speaking his mind to curb himself under such treatment nevertheless 
his consideration for me would make him confine himself in his
observations to facts that were too flagrant and too openly avowed to
be disputed it could not therefore justly displease he would venture
to say if he made this natural inference from the premises that
if such were my father's behaviour to a wife who disputed not the
imaginary prerogatives he was so unprecedently fond of asserting what
room had a daughter to hope that he would depart from an
authority he was so earnest and so much more concerned to
maintain family-interests at the same time engaging an aversion 
however causelessly conceived stimulating my brother's and sister's
resentments and selfish views cooperating and my banishment from their
presence depriving me of all personal plea or entreaty in my own favour 

how unhappy my dear that there is but too much reason for these
observations and for this inference made likewise with more coolness
and respect to my family than one would have apprehended from a man
so much provoked and of passions so high and generally thought
uncontroulable 

will you not question me about throbs and glows if from such instances
of a command over his fiery temper for my sake i am ready to infer 
that were my friends capable of a reconciliation with him he might be
affected by arguments apparently calculated for his present and future
good nor is it a very bad indication that he has such moderate notions
of that very high prerogative in husbands of which we in our family
have been accustomed to hear so much 

he represented to me that my present disgraceful confinement was known
to all the world that neither my sister nor my brother scrupled to
represent me as an obliged and favoured child in a state of actual
rebellion that nevertheless every body who knew me was ready to
justify me for an aversion to a man whom every body thought utterly
unworthy of me and more fit for my sister that unhappy as he was 
in not having been able to make any greater impression upon me in his
favour all the world gave me to him nor was there but one objection
made to him by his very enemies his birth his prospects all very
unexceptionable and the latter splendid and that objection he
thanked god and my example was in a fair way of being removed for
ever since he had seen his error and was heartily sick of the courses
he had followed which however were far less enormous than malice and
envy had represented them to be but of this he should say the less as
it were much better to justify himself by his actions than by the most
solemn asseverations and promises and then complimenting my person 
he assured me for that he always loved virtue although he had not
followed its rules as he ought that he was still more captivated with
the graces of my mind and would frankly own that till he had the
honour to know me he had never met with an inducement sufficient to
enable him to overcome an unhappy kind of prejudice to matrimony which
had made him before impenetrable to the wishes and recommendations of
all his relations 

you see my dear he scruples not to speak of himself as his enemies
speak of him i can't say but his openness in these particulars gives
a credit to his other professions i should easily i think detect
an hypocrite and this man particularly who is said to have allowed
himself in great liberties were he to pretend to instantaneous lights
and convictions at this time of life too habits i am sensible are
not so easily changed you have always joined with me in remarking that
he will speak his mind with freedom even to a degree of unpoliteness
sometimes and that his very treatment of my family is a proof that he
cannot make a mean court to any body for interest sake what pity where
there are such laudable traces that they should have been so mired and
choaked up as i may say we have heard that the man's head is better
than his heart but do you really think mr lovelace can have a very bad
heart why should not there be something in blood in the human
creature as well as in the ignobler animals none of his family are
exceptionable but himself indeed the characters of the ladies are
admirable but i shall incur the imputation i wish to avoid yet what a
look of censoriousness does it carry in an unsparing friend to take one
to task for doing that justice and making those which one ought without
scruple to do and to make in the behalf of any other man living 

he then again pressed me to receive a letter of offered protection from
lady betty he said that people of birth stood a little too much upon
punctilio as people of value also did but indeed birth worthily lived
up to was virtue virtue birth the inducements to a decent punctilio
the same the origin of both one  how came this notion from him  
else lady betty would write to me but she would be willing to be first
apprized that her offer will be well received as it would have the
appearance of being made against the liking of one part of my family 
and which nothing would induce her to make but the degree of unworthy
persecution which i actually laboured under and had reason further to
apprehend 

i told him that however greatly i thought myself obliged to lady betty
lawrance if this offer came from herself yet it was easy to see to
what it led it might look like vanity in me perhaps to say that this
urgency in him on this occasion wore the face of art in order to
engage me into measures from which i might not easily extricate myself 
i said that i should not be affected by the splendour of even a royal
title goodness i thought was greatness that the excellent characters
of the ladies of his family weighed more with me than the consideration
that they were half-sisters to lord m and daughters of an earl that
he would not have found encouragement from me had my friends been
consenting to his address if he had only a mere relative merit to those
ladies since in that case the very reasons that made me admire them 
would have been so many objections to their kinsman 

i then assured him that it was with infinite concern that i had found
myself drawn into an epistolary correspondence with him especially
since that correspondence had been prohibited and the only agreeable
use i could think of making of this unexpected and undesired interview 
was to let him know that i should from henceforth think myself obliged
to discontinue it and i hoped that he would not have the thought of
engaging me to carry it on by menacing my relations 

there was light enough to distinguish that he looked very grave upon
this he so much valued my free choice he said and my unbiassed
favour scorning to set himself upon a footing with solmes in the
compulsory methods used in that man's behalf that he should hate
himself were he capable of a view of intimidating me by so very poor
a method but nevertheless there were two things to be considered 
first that the continual outrages he was treated with the spies set
over him one of which he had detected the indignities all his family
were likewise treated with as also myself avowedly in malice to him 
or he should not presume to take upon himself to resent for me without
my leave  the artful wretch saw he would have lain open here had he not
thus guarded  all these considerations called upon him to shew a proper
resentment and he would leave it to me to judge whether it would be
reasonable for him as a man of spirit to bear such insults if it
were not for my sake i would be pleased to consider in the next place 
whether the situation i was in a prisoner in my father's house and my
whole family determined to compel me to marry a man unworthy of me and
that speedily and whether i consented or not admitted of delay in the
preventive measures he was desirous to put me upon in the last resort
only nor was there a necessity he said if i were actually in lady
betty's protection that i should be his if afterwards i should see
any thing objectionable in his conduct 

but what would the world conclude would be the end i demanded were i 
in the last resort as he proposed to throw myself into the protection
of his friends but that it was with such a view 

and what less did the world think of me now he asked than that i was
confined that i might not you are to consider madam you have not now
an option and to whom is it owing that you have not and that you
are in the power of those parents why should i call them who are
determined that you shall not have an option all i propose is that
you will embrace such a protection but not till you have tried every
way to avoid the necessity for it 

and give me leave to say proceeded he that if a correspondence on
which i have founded all my hopes is at this critical conjuncture to
be broken off and if you are resolved not to be provided against the
worst it must be plain to me that you will at last yield to that
worst worst to me only it cannot be to you and then  and he put his
hand clenched to his forehead  how shall i bear this supposition then
will you be that solmes's but by all that's sacred neither he nor
your brother nor your uncles shall enjoy their triumph perdition
seize my soul if they shall 

the man's vehemence frightened me yet in resentment i would have
left him but throwing himself at my feet again leave me not thus i
beseech you dearest madam leave me not thus in despair i kneel not 
repenting of what i have vowed in such a case as that i have supposed 
i re-vow it at your feet and so he did but think not it is by way
of menace or to intimidate you to favour me if your heart inclines
you  and then he arose  to obey your father your brother rather and to
have solmes although i shall avenge myself on those who have insulted
me for their insults to myself and family yet will i tear out my heart
from this bosom if possible with my own hands were it to scruple to
give up its ardours to a woman capable of such a preference 

i told him that he talked to me in very high language but he might
assure himself that i never would have mr solmes yet that this i said
not in favour to him and i had declared as much to my relations were
there not such a man as himself in the world 

would i declare that i would still honour him with my
correspondence he could not bear that hoping to obtain greater
instances of my favour he should forfeit the only one he had to boast
of 

i bid him forbear rashness or resentment to any of my family and i
would for some time at least till i saw what issue my present trials
were likely to have proceed with a correspondence which nevertheless 
my heart condemned 

and his spirit him the impatient creature said interrupting me for
bearing what he did when he considered that the necessity of it was
imposed upon him not by my will for then he would bear it cheerfully 
and a thousand times more but by creatures and there he stopt 

i told him plainly that he might thank himself whose indifferent
character as to morals had given such a handle against him for all 
it was but just that a man should be spoken evil of who set no value
upon his reputation 

he offered to vindicate himself but i told him i would judge him by
his own rule by his actions not by his professions 

were not his enemies he said so powerful and so determined and had
they not already shewn their intentions in such high acts of even cruel
compulsion but would leave me to my choice or to my desire of living
single he would have been content to undergo a twelvemonth's probation 
or more but he was confident that one month would either complete all
their purposes or render them abortive and i best knew what hopes i
had of my father's receding he did not know him if i had any 

i said i would try every method that either my duty or my influence
upon any of them should suggest before i would put myself into any
other protection and if nothing else would do would resign the envied
estate and that i dared to say would 

he was contented he said to abide that issue he should be far from
wishing me to embrace any other protection but as he had frequently
said in the last necessity but dearest creature said he catching
my hand with ardour and pressing it to his lips if the yielding up
of that estate will do resign it and be mine and i will corroborate 
with all my soul your resignation 

this was not ungenerously said but what will not these men say to
obtain belief and a power over one 

i made many efforts to go and now it was so dark that i began to have
great apprehensions i cannot say from his behaviour indeed he has a
good deal raised himself in my opinion by the personal respect even to
reverence which he paid me during the whole conference for although
he flamed out once upon a supposition that solmes might succeed it was
upon a supposition that would excuse passion if any thing could you
know in a man pretending to love with fervour although it was so
levelled that i could not avoid resenting it 

he recommended himself to my favour at parting with great earnestness 
yet with as great submission not offering to condition any thing with
me although he hinted his wishes for another meeting which i forbad
him ever attempting again in the same place and i will own to you 
from whom i should be really blamable to conceal any thing that his
arguments drawn from the disgraceful treatment i meet with of what
i am to expect make me begin to apprehend that i shall be under an
obligation to be either the one man's or the other's and if so i
fancy i shall not incur your blame were i to say which of the two it
must be you have said which it must not be but o my dear the single
life is by far the most eligible to me indeed it is and i hope yet to
be permitted to make that option 

i got back without observation but the apprehension that i should
not gave me great uneasiness and made me begin a letter in a greater
flutter than he gave me cause to be in except at the first seeing him 
for then indeed my spirits failed me and it was a particular felicity 
that in such a place in such a fright and alone with him i fainted
not away 

i should add that having reproached him with his behaviour the last
sunday at church he solemnly assured me that it was not what had been
represented to me that he did not expect to see me there but hoped to
have an opportunity to address himself to my father and to be permitted
to attend him home but that the good dr lewen had persuaded him not
to attempt speaking to any of the family at that time observing to him
the emotions into which his presence had put every body he intended
no pride or haughtiness of behaviour he assured me and that the
attributing such to him was the effect of that ill-will which he had
the mortification to find insuperable adding that when he bowed to my
mother it was a compliment he intended generally to every one in the
pew as well as to her whom he sincerely venerated 

if he may be believed and i should think he would not have come
purposely to defy my family yet expect favour from me one may see 
my dear the force of hatred which misrepresents all things yet why
should shorey except officiously to please her principals make a
report in his disfavour he told me that he would appeal to dr lewen
for his justification on this head adding that the whole conversation
between the doctor and him turned upon his desire to attempt to
reconcile himself to us all in the face of the church and upon
the doctor's endeavouring to dissuade him from making such a public
overture till he knew how it would be accepted but to what purpose
his appeal when i am debarred from seeing that good man or any one who
would advise me what to do in my present difficult situation 

i fancy my dear however that there would hardly be a guilty person in
the world were each suspected or accused person to tell his or her own
story and be allowed any degree of credit 

i have written a very long letter 

to be so particular as you require in subjects of conversation it is
impossible to be short 

i will add to it only the assurance that i am and ever will be 

your affectionate and faithful friend and servant clarissa harlowe 

you'll be so good my dear as to remember that the date of your last
letter to me was the 9th 




letter xxxvii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe sunday march 19 


i beg your pardon my dearest friend for having given you occasion to
remind me of the date of my last i was willing to have before me as
much of the workings of your wise relations as possible being verily
persuaded that one side or the other would have yielded by this
time and then i should have had some degree of certainty to found my
observations upon and indeed what can i write that i have not already
written you know that i can do nothing but rave at your stupid
persecutors and that you don't like i have advised you to resume your
own estate that you won't do you cannot bear the thoughts of having
their solmes and lovelace is resolved you shall be his let who will
say to the contrary i think you must be either the one man's or the
other's let us see what their next step will be 

as to lovelace while he tells his own story having also behaved so
handsomely on his intrusion in the wood-house and intended so well at
church who can say that the man is in the least blameworthy wicked
people to combine against so innocent a man but as i said let us
see what their next step will be and what course you will take upon it 
and then we may be the more enlightened 

as to your change of style to your uncles and brother and sister since
they were so fond of attributing to you a regard for lovelace and would
not be persuaded to the contrary and since you only strengthened their
arguments against yourself by denying it you did but just as i would
have done in giving way to their suspicions and trying what that would
do but if but if pray my dear indulge me a little you yourself
think it was necessary to apologize to me for that change of style to
them and till you will speak out like a friend to her unquestionable
friend i must tease you a little let it run therefore for it will
run 

if then there be not a reason for this change of style which you have
not thought fit to give me be so good as to watch as i once before
advised you how the cause for it will come on why should it be
permitted to steal upon you and you know nothing of the matter 

when we get a great cold we are apt to puzzle ourselves to find out
when it began or how we got it and when that is accounted for down
we sit contented and let it have its course or if it be very
troublesome take a sweat or use other means to get rid of it so
my dear before the malady you wot of yet wot not of grows so
importunate as that you must be obliged to sweat it out let me advise
you to mind how it comes on for i am persuaded as surely as that i am
now writing to you that the indiscreet violence of your friends on the
one hand and the insinuating address of lovelace on the other if the
man be not a greater fool than any body thinks him will effectually
bring it to this and do all his work for him 

but let it if it must be lovelace or solmes the choice cannot admit of
debate yet if all be true that is reported i should prefer almost any
of your other lovers to either unworthy as they also are but who can
be worthy of a clarissa 

i wish you are not indeed angry with me for harping so much on one
string i must own that i should think myself inexcusable so to do 
 the rather as i am bold enough to imagine it a point out of all doubt
from fifty places in your letters were i to labour the proof if you
would ingenuously own 

own what you'll say why my anna howe i hope you don't think that i
am already in love 

no to be sure how can your anna howe have such a thought what then
shall we call it you might have helped me to a phrase a conditional
kind of liking that's it o my friend did i not know how much you
despise prudery and that you are too young and too lovely to be a
prude 

but avoiding such hard names let me tell you one thing my dear which
nevertheless i have told you before and that is this that i shall
think i have reason to be highly displeased with you if when you write
to me you endeavour to keep from me any secret of your heart 

let me add that if you would clearly and explicitly tell me how far
lovelace has or has not a hold in your affections i could better
advise you what to do than at present i can you who are so famed
for prescience as i may call it and than whom no young lady ever had
stronger pretensions to a share of it have had no doubt reasonings
in your heart about him supposing you were to be one day his  no doubt
but you have had the same in solmes's case whence the ground for the
hatred of the one and for the conditional liking of the other   will
you tell me my dear what you have thought of lovelace's best and of
his worst how far eligible for the first how far rejectable for the
last then weighing both parts in opposite scales we shall see which
is likely to preponderate or rather which does preponderate nothing
less than the knowledge of the inmost recesses of your heart can
satisfy my love and my friendship surely you are not afraid to trust
yourself with a secret of this nature if you are then you may the more
allowably doubt me but i dare say you will not own either nor is
there i hope cause for either 

be pleased to observe one thing my dear that whenever i have given
myself any of those airs of raillery which have seemed to make you look
about you when likewise your case may call for a more serious turn
from a sympathizing friend it has not been upon those passages which
are written though perhaps not intended with such explicitness  don't
be alarmed my dear   as leaves little cause of doubt but only when you
affect reserve when you give new words for common things when you
come with your curiosities with your conditional likings and with your
prude-encies  mind how i spell the word  in a case that with every other
person defies all prudence over-acts of treason all these against the
sovereign friendship we have avowed to each other 

remember that you found me out in a moment you challenged me i owned
directly that there was only my pride between the man and me for i
could not endure i told you to think of any fellow living to give me a
moment's uneasiness and then my man as i have elsewhere said was not
such a one as yours so i had reason to impute full as much as to my own
inconsideration as to his power over me nay more but still more
to yours for you reasoned me out of the curiosity first and when the
liking was brought to be conditional why then you know i throbbed no
more about him 

o pray now as you say now i have mentioned that my fellow was not
such a charming fellow as yours let miss biddulph miss lloyd miss
campion and me have your opinion how far figure ought to engage us 
with a view to your own case however mind that as mr tony says and
whether at all if the man be vain of it since as you observe in a
former that vanity is a stop-short pride in such a one that would make
one justly doubt the worthiness of his interior you our pattern so
lovely in feature so graceful in person have none of it and have
therefore with the best grace always held that it is not excusable even
in a woman 

you must know that this subject was warmly debated among us in our last
conversation and miss lloyd wished me to write to you upon it for your
opinion to which in every debated case we always paid the greatest
deference i hope you will not be so much engrossed by your weighty
cares as not to have freedom of spirits enough to enter upon the task 
you know how much we all admire your opinion on such topics which ever
produces something new and instructive as you handle the subjects and
pray tell us to what you think it owing that your man seems so careful
to adorn that self-adorned person of his yet so manages that one
cannot for one's heart think him a coxcomb let this question and the
above tasks divert and not displease you my dear one subject though
ever so important could never yet engross your capacious mind if
they should displease you you must recollect the many instances of my
impertinence which you have forgiven and then say this is a mad girl 
but yet i love her and she is my own'

anna howe 




letter xxxviii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe monday march 20 


your last so sensibly affects me that i must postpone every other
consideration however weighty to reply to it and this i will do
very distinctly and with all the openness of heart which our mutual
friendship demands 

but let me observe in the first place gratefully observe that if i
have in fifty passages of my letters given you such undoubted proofs of
my value for mr lovelace that you have spared me for the sake of my
explicitness it is acting by me with a generosity worthy of yourself 

but lives the man think you who is so very bad that he does not give
even a doubting mind reason at one time to be better pleased with him
than at another and when that reason offers is it not just to express
one's self accordingly i would do the man who addresses me as much
justice as if he did not address me it has such a look of tyranny it
appears so ungenerous methinks in our sex to use a man worse for his
respect to us no other cause for disrespect occurring that i would
not by any means be that person who should do so 

but although i may intend no more than justice it will perhaps be
difficult to hinder those who know the man's views from construing it
as a partial favour and especially if the eager-eyed observer has been
formerly touched herself and would triumph that her friend had been no
more able to escape than she noble minds emulative of perfection and
yet the passion properly directed i do not take to be an imperfection
neither may be allowed a little generous envy i think 

if i meant by this a reflection by way of revenge it is but a revenge 
my dear in the soft sense of the word i love as i have told you your
pleasantry although at the time your reproof may pain me a little yet 
on recollection when i find it more of the cautioning friend than
of the satirizing observer i shall be all gratitude upon it all the
business will be this i shall be sensible of the pain in the present
letter perhaps but i shall thank you in the next and ever after 

in this way i hope my dear you will account for a little of
that sensibility which you find above and perhaps still more as i
proceed you frequently remind me by an excellent example your own to
me that i must not spare you 

i am not conscious that i have written any thing of this man that has
not been more in his dispraise than in his favour such is the man that
i think i must have been faulty and ought to take myself to account 
if i had not but you think otherwise i will not put you upon labouring
the proof as you call it my conduct must then have a faulty appearance
at least and i will endeavour to rectify it but of this i assure you 
that whatever interpretation my words were capable of i intended not
any reserve to you i wrote my heart at the time if i had had thought
of disguising it or been conscious that there was reason for doing
so perhaps i had not given you the opportunity of remarking upon my
curiosity after his relations' esteem for me nor upon my conditional
liking and such-like all i intended by the first i believe i
honestly told you at the time to that letter i therefore refer whether
it make for me or against me and by the other that i might bear in
mind what it became a person of my sex and character to be and to
do in such an unhappy situation where the imputed love is thought an
undutiful and therefore a criminal passion and where the supported
object of it is a man of faulty morals too and i am sure you will
excuse my desire of appearing at those times the person i ought to be 
had i no other view in it but to merit the continuance of your good
opinion 

but that i may acquit myself of having reserves o my dear i must here
break off 




letter xxxix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe monday march 12 


this letter will account to you my dear for my abrupt breaking off in
the answer i was writing to yours of yesterday and which possibly 
i shall not be able to finish and send you till to-morrow or next day 
having a great deal to say to the subjects you put to me in it what
i am now to give you are the particulars of another effort made by my
friends through the good mrs norton 

it seems they had sent to her yesterday to be here this day to take
their instructions and to try what she could do with me it would 
at least i suppose they thought have this effect to render me
inexcusable with her or to let her see that there was no room for the
expostulations she had often wanted to make in my favour to my mother 

the declaration that my heart was free afforded them an argument to
prove obstinacy and perverseness upon me since it could be nothing else
that governed me in my opposition to their wills if i had no particular
esteem for another man and now that i have given them reason in
order to obviate this argument to suppose that i have a preference to
another they are resolved to carry their schemes into execution as soon
as possible and in order to do this they sent for this good woman for
whom they know i have even a filial regard 

she found assembled my father and mother my brother and sister my two
uncles and my aunt hervey 

my brother acquainted her with all that had passed since she was last
permitted to see me with the contents of my letters avowing my regard
for mr lovelace as they all interpreted them with the substance of
their answers to them and with their resolutions 

my mother spoke next and delivered herself to this effect as the good
woman told me 

after reciting how many times i had been indulged in my refusals of
different men and the pains she had taken with me to induce me to
oblige my whole family in one instance out of five or six and my
obstinacy upon it o my good mrs norton said the dear lady could
you have thought that my clarissa and your clarissa was capable of so
determined an opposition to the will of parents so indulgent to her but
see what you can do with her the matter is gone too far to be receded
from on our parts her father had concluded every thing with mr solmes 
not doubting her compliance such noble settlements mrs norton and
such advantages to the whole family in short she has it in her power
to lay an obligation upon us all mr solmes knowing she has good
principles and hoping by his patience now and good treatment
hereafter to engage her gratitude and by degrees her love is willing
to overlook all 

 overlook all my dear mr solmes to overlook all there's a word  

so mrs norton if you are convinced that it is a child's duty to
submit to her parents' authority in the most important point as well as
in the least i beg you will try your influence over her i have none 
her father has none her uncles neither although it is her apparent
interest to oblige us all for on that condition her grandfather's
estate is not half of what living and dying is purposed to be done for
her if any body can prevail with her it is you and i hope you will
heartily enter upon this task 

the good woman asked whether she was permitted to expostulate with them
upon the occasion before she came up to me 

my arrogant brother told her she was sent for to expostulate with his
sister and not with them and this goody norton  she is always
goody with him   you may tell her that the treaty with mr solmes is
concluded that nothing but her compliance with her duty is wanting 
of consequence that there is no room for your expostulation or hers
either 

be assured of this mrs norton said my father in an angry tone that
we will not be baffled by her we will not appear like fools in this
matter and as if we have no authority over our own daughter we will
not in short be bullied out of our child by a cursed rake who had
like to have killed our only son and so she had better make a merit
of her obedience for comply she shall if i live independent as she
thinks my father's indiscreet bounty has made her of me her father 
indeed since that she has never been like she was before an unjust
bequest and it is likely to prosper accordingly but if she marry
that vile rake lovelace i will litigate every shilling with her tell
her so and that the will may be set aside and shall 

my uncles joined with equal heat 

my brother was violent in his declarations 

my sister put in with vehemence on the same side 

my aunt hervey was pleased to say there was no article so proper for
parents to govern in as this of marriage and it was very fit mine
should be obliged 

thus instructed the good woman came up to me she told me all that had
passed and was very earnest with me to comply and so much justice did
she to the task imposed upon her that i more than once thought that
her own opinion went with theirs but when she saw what an immovable
aversion i had to the man she lamented with me their determined
resolution and then examined into the sincerity of my declaration 
that i would gladly compound with them by living single of this being
satisfied she was so convinced that this offer which carried into
execution would exclude lovelace effectually ought to be accepted 
that she would go down although i told her it was what i had tendered
over-and-over to no purpose and undertake to be guaranty for me on that
score 

she went accordingly but soon returned in tears being used harshly for
urging this alternative they had a right to my obedience upon their
own terms they said my proposal was an artifice only to gain time 
nothing but marrying mr solmes should do they had told me so before 
they should not be at rest till it was done for they knew what an
interest lovelace had in my heart i had as good as owned it in my
letters to my uncles and brother and sister although i had most
disingenuously declared otherwise to my mother i depended they said 
upon their indulgence and my own power over them they would not
have banished me from their presence if they had not known that their
consideration for me was greater than mine for them and they would
be obeyed or i never should be restored to their favour let the
consequence be what it would 

my brother thought fit to tell the good woman that her whining nonsense
did but harden me there was a perverseness he said in female minds a
tragedy-pride that would make a romantic young creature such a one as
me risque any thing to obtain pity i was of an age and a turn  the
insolent said  to be fond of a lover-like distress and my grief which
she pleaded would never break my heart i should sooner break that of
the best and most indulgent of mothers he added that she might once
more go up to me but that if she prevailed not he should suspect 
that the man they all hated had found a way to attach her to his
interest 

every body blamed him for this unworthy reflection which greatly
affected the good woman but nevertheless he said and nobody
contradicted him that if she could not prevail upon her sweet child 
 as it seems she had fondly called me   she had best draw to her own
home and there tarry till she was sent for and so leave her sweet
child to her father's management 

sure nobody had ever so insolent so hard-hearted a brother as i have 
so much resignation to be expected from me so much arrogance and to so
good a woman and of so fine an understanding to be allowed in him 

she nevertheless told him that however she might be ridiculed for
speaking of the sweetness of my disposition she must take upon herself
to say that there never was a sweeter in the sex and that she had
ever found that my mild methods and gentleness i might at any time be
prevailed upon even in points against my own judgment and opinion 

my aunt hervey hereupon said it was worth while to consider what
mrs norton said and that she had sometimes allowed herself to doubt 
whether i had been begun with by such methods as generous tempers are
only to be influenced by in cases where their hearts are supposed to be
opposite to the will of their friends 

she had both my brother and sister upon her for this who referred to
my mother whether she had not treated me with an indulgence that had
hardly any example 

my mother said she must own that no indulgence had been wanting from
her but she must needs say and had often said it that the reception
i met with on my return from miss howe and the manner in which the
proposal of mr solmes was made to me which was such as left nothing
to my choice and before i had an opportunity to converse with him 
were not what she had by any means approved of 

she was silenced you will guess by whom with my dear my dear you
have ever something to say something to palliate for this rebel of a
girl remember her treatment of you of me remember that the wretch 
whom we so justly hate would not dare persist in his purposes but for
her encouragement of him and obstinacy to us mrs norton  angrily to
her   go up to her once more and if you think gentleness will do you
have a commission to be gentle if it will not never make use of that
plea again 

ay my good woman said my mother try your force with her my sister
hervey and i will go up to her and bring her down in our hands to
receive her father's blessing and assurances of every body's love if
she will be prevailed upon and in that case we will all love you the
better for your good offices 

she came up to me and repeated all these passages with tears but i
told her that after what had passed between us she could not hope to
prevail upon me to comply with measures so wholly my brother's and so
much to my aversion and then folding me to her maternal bosom i leave
you my dearest miss said she i leave you because i must but let me
beseech you to do nothing rashly nothing unbecoming your character if
all be true that is said mr lovelace cannot deserve you if you can
comply remember it is your duty to comply they take not i own the
right method with so generous a spirit but remember that there would
not be any merit in your compliance if it were not to be against
your own liking remember also what is expected from a character
so extraordinary as yours remember it is in your power to unite or
disunite your whole family for ever although it should at present be
disagreeable to you to be thus compelled your prudence i dare say 
when you consider the matter seriously will enable you to get over
all prejudices against the one and all prepossessions in favour of the
other and then the obligation you will lay all your family under 
will be not only meritorious in you with regard to them but in a few
months very probably highly satisfactory as well as reputable to
yourself 

consider my dear mrs norton said i only consider that it is not a
small thing that is insisted upon not for a short duration it is for
my life consider too that all this is owing to an overbearing brother 
who governs every body consider how desirous i am to oblige them if
a single life and breaking all correspondence with the man they hate 
because my brother hates him will do it 

i consider every thing my dearest miss and added to what i have said 
do you only consider that if by pursuing your own will and rejecting
theirs you should be unhappy you will be deprived of all that
consolation which those have who have been directed by their parents 
although the event prove not answerable to their wishes 

i must go repeated she your brother will say  and she wept  that i
harden you by my whining nonsense tis indeed hard that so much
regard should be paid to the humours of one child and so little to
the inclination of another but let me repeat that it is your duty to
acquiesce if you can acquiesce your father has given your brother's
schemes his sanction and they are now his mr lovelace i doubt 
is not a man that will justify your choice so much as he will their
dislike it is easy to see that your brother has a view in discrediting
you with all your friends with your uncles in particular but for that
very reason you should comply if possible in order to disconcert his
ungenerous measures i will pray for you and that is all i can do for
you i must now go down and make a report that you are resolved never
to have mr solmes must i consider my dear miss clary must i 

indeed you must but of this i do assure you that i will do nothing to
disgrace the part you have had in my education i will bear every thing
that shall be short of forcing my hand into his who never can have any
share in my heart i will try by patient duty by humility to overcome
them but death will i choose in any shape rather than that man 

i dread to go down said she with so determined an answer they will
have no patience with me but let me leave you with one observation 
which i beg of you always to bear in mind 

that persons of prudence and distinguished talents like yours seem
to be sprinkled through the world to give credit by their example to
religion and virtue when such persons wilfully err how great must
be the fault how ungrateful to that god who blessed them with such
talents what a loss likewise to the world what a wound to virtue but
this i hope will never be to be said of miss clarissa harlowe 

i could give her no answer but by my tears and i thought when she
went away the better half of my heart went with her 

i listened to hear what reception she would meet with below and found
it was just such a one as she had apprehended 

will she or will she not be mrs solmes none of your whining
circumlocutions mrs norton  you may guess who said this  will she 
or will she not comply with her parents' will 

this cut short all she was going to say 

if i must speak so briefly miss will sooner die than have 

any body but lovelace interrupted my brother this madam this sir 
is your meek daughter this is mrs norton's sweet child well goody 
you may return to your own habitation i am empowered to forbid you to
have any correspondence with this perverse girl for a month to come as
you value the favour of our whole family or of any individual of it 

and saying this uncontradicted by any body he himself shewed her
to the door no doubt with all that air of cruel insult which the
haughty rich can put on to the unhappy low who have not pleased them 

so here my dear miss howe am i deprived of the advice of one of the
most prudent and conscientious women in the world were i to have ever
so much occasion for it 

i might indeed write as i presume under your cover and receive her
answers to what i should write but should such a correspondence be
charged upon her i know she would not be guilty of a falsehood for the
world nor even of an equivocation and should she own it after this
prohibition she would forfeit my mother's favour for ever and in my
dangerous fever some time ago i engaged my mother to promise me that 
if i died before i could do any thing for the good woman she would set
her above want for the rest of her life should her eyes fail her or
sickness befall her and she could not provide for herself as she now
so prettily does by her fine needle-works 

what measures will they fall upon next will they not recede when they
find that it must be a rooted antipathy and nothing else that could
make a temper not naturally inflexible so sturdy 

adieu my dear be you happy to know that it is in your power to be
so is all that seems wanting to make you so 

cl harlowe 




letter xl

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe  in continuation of the subject in
letter xxxviii  


i will now though midnight for i have no sleep in my eyes resume
the subject i was forced so abruptly to quit and will obey yours miss
lloyd's miss campion's and miss biddulph's call with as much temper
as my divided thought will admit the dead stillness of this solemn hour
will i hope contribute to calm my disturbed mind 

in order to acquit myself of so heavy a charge as that of having
reserves to so dear a friend i will acknowledge and i thought i had
over-and-over that it is owing to my particular situation if mr 
lovelace appears to me in a tolerable light and i take upon me to say 
that had they opposed to him a man of sense of virtue of generosity 
one who enjoyed his fortune with credit who had a tenderness in his
nature for the calamities of others which would have given a moral
assurance that he would have been still less wanting in grateful
returns to an obliging spirit had they opposed such a man as this to
mr lovelace and been as earnest to have me married as now they are 
i do not know myself if they would have had reason to tax me with that
invincible obstinacy which they lay to my charge and this whatever
had been the figure of the man since the heart is what we women should
judge by in the choice we make as the best security for the party's
good behaviour in every relation of life 

but situated as i am thus persecuted and driven i own to you that
i have now-and-then had a little more difficulty than i wished for in
passing by mr lovelace's tolerable qualities to keep up my dislike to
him for his others 

you say i must have argued with myself in his favour and in his
disfavour on a supposition that i might possibly be one day his i
own that i have and thus called upon by my dearest friend i will set
before you both parts of the argument 

and first what occurred to me in his favour 

at his introduction into our family his negative virtues were insisted
upon he was no gamester no horse-racer no fox-hunter no drinker 
my poor aunt hervey had in confidence given us to apprehend much
disagreeable evil especially to a wife of the least delicacy from a
wine-lover and common sense instructed us that sobriety in a man is
no small point to be secured when so many mischiefs happen daily from
excess i remember that my sister made the most of this favourable
circumstance in his character while she had any hopes of him 

he was never thought to be a niggard not even ungenerous nor when
his conduct came to be inquired into an extravagant a squanderer his
pride  so far was it a laudable pride  secured him from that then he
was ever ready to own his errors he was no jester upon sacred things 
poor mr wyerley's fault who seemed to think there was wit in saying
bold things which would shock a serious mind his conversation with us
was always unexceptionable even chastely so which be his actions what
they would shewed him capable of being influenced by decent company 
and that he might probably therefore be a led man rather than a leader 
in other company and one late instance so late as last saturday
evening has raised him not a little in my opinion with regard to this
point of good and at the same time of manly behaviour 

as to the advantage of birth that is of his side above any man who has
been found out for me if we may judge by that expression of his 
which you were pleased with at the time that upon true quality and
hereditary distinction if good sense were not wanting humour sat as
easy as his glove  that with as familiar an air was his familiar
expression while none but the prosperous upstart mushroomed into
rank another of his peculiars was arrogantly proud of it  if i
say we may judge of him by this we shall conclude in his favour that
he knows what sort of behaviour is to be expected from persons of birth 
whether he act up to it or not conviction is half way to amendment 

his fortunes in possession are handsome in expectation splendid so
nothing need be said on that subject 

but it is impossible say some that he should make a tender or kind
husband those who are for imposing upon me such a man as mr solmes 
and by methods so violent are not entitled to make this objection but
now on this subject let me tell you how i have argued with myself for
still you must remember that i am upon the extenuating part of his
character 

a great deal of the treatment a wife may expect from him will possibly
depend upon herself perhaps she must practise as well as promise
obedience to a man so little used to controul and must be careful to
oblige and what husband expects not this the more perhaps if he had
not reason to assure himself of the preferable love of his wife before
she became such and how much easier and pleasanter to obey the man of
her choice if he should be even more unreasonable sometimes than one
she would not have had could she have avoided it then i think as
the men were the framers of the matrimonial office and made obedience
a part of the woman's vow she ought not even in policy to shew him 
that she can break through her part of the contract however lightly
she may think of the instance lest he should take it into his head
 himself is judge to think as lightly of other points which she may
hold more important but indeed no point so solemnly vowed can be
slight 

thus principled and acting accordingly what a wretch must that husband
be who could treat such a wife brutally will lovelace's wife be the
only person to whom he will not pay the grateful debt of civility and
good manners he is allowed to be brave who ever knew a brave man if a
brave man of sense an universally base man and how much the gentleness
of our sex and the manner of our training up and education make us
need the protection of the brave and the countenance of the generous 
let the general approbation which we are all so naturally inclined to
give to men of that character testify 

at worst will he confine me prisoner to my chamber will he deny me the
visits of my dearest friend and forbid me to correspond with her will
he take from me the mistressly management which i had not faultily
discharged will he set a servant over me with license to insult me 
will he as he has not a sister permit his cousins montague or would
either of those ladies accept of a permission to insult and tyrannize
over me it cannot be why then think i often do you tempt me o my
cruel friends to try the difference 

and then has the secret pleasure intruded itself to be able to reclaim
such a man to the paths of virtue and honour to be a secondary means 
if i were to be his of saving him and preventing the mischiefs so
enterprising a creature might otherwise be guilty of if he be such a
one 

when i have thought of him in these lights and that as a man of sense
he will sooner see his errors than another i own to you that i have
had some difficulty to avoid taking the path they so violently endeavour
to make me shun and all that command of my passions which has been
attributed to me as my greatest praise and in so young a creature as
my distinction has hardly been sufficient for me 

and let me add that the favour of his relations all but himself
unexceptionable has made a good deal of additional weight thrown in
the same scale 

but now in his disfavour when i have reflected upon the prohibition
of my parents the giddy appearance disgraceful to our sex that such
a preference would have that there is no manner of likelihood enflamed
by the rencounter and upheld by art and ambition on my brother's side 
that ever the animosity will be got over that i must therefore be at
perpetual variance with all my own family that i must go to him and to
his as an obliged and half-fortuned person that his aversion to them
all is as strong as theirs to him that his whole family are hated
for his sake they hating ours in return that he has a very immoral
character as to women that knowing this it is a high degree of
impurity to think of joining in wedlock with such a man that he is
young unbroken his passions unsubdued that he is violent in his
temper yet artful i am afraid vindictive too that such a husband
might unsettle me in all my own principles and hazard my future hopes 
that his own relations two excellent aunts and an uncle from whom
he has such large expectations have no influence upon him that what
tolerable qualities he has are founded more in pride than in virtue 
that allowing as he does the excellency of moral precepts and
believing the doctrine of future rewards and punishments he can live as
if he despised the one and defied the other the probability that the
taint arising from such free principles may go down into the manners
of posterity that i knowing these things and the importance of them 
should be more inexcusable than one who knows them not since an error
against judgment is worse infinitely worse than an error in judgment 
reflecting upon these things i cannot help conjuring you my dear to
pray with me and to pray for me that i may not be pushed upon such
indiscreet measures as will render me inexcusable to myself for that
is the test after all the world's opinion ought to be but a secondary
consideration 

i have said in his praise that he is extremely ready to own his errors 
but i have sometimes made a great drawback upon this article in his
disfavour having been ready to apprehend that this ingenuousness may
possibly be attributable to two causes neither of them by any means 
creditable to him the one that his vices are so much his masters that
he attempts not to conquer them the other that he may think it policy 
to give up one half of his character to save the other when the
whole may be blamable by this means silencing by acknowledgment
the objections he cannot answer which may give him the praise of
ingenuousness when he can obtain no other and when the challenged
proof might bring out upon discussion other evils these you will
allow are severe constructions but every thing his enemies say of him
cannot be false 

i will proceed by-and-by 


 


sometimes we have both thought him one of the most undesigning merely
witty men we ever knew at other times one of the deepest creatures
we ever conversed with so that when in one visit we have imagined
we fathomed him in the next he has made us ready to give him up as
impenetrable this impenetrableness my dear is to be put among the
shades in his character yet upon the whole you have been so far
of his party that you have contested that his principal fault is
over-frankness and too much regardlessness of appearances and that he
is too giddy to be very artful you would have it that at the time he
says any thing good he means what he speaks that his variableness and
levity are constitutional owing to sound health and to a soul and body
 that was your observation  fitted for and pleased with each other and
hence you concluded that could this consentaneousness  as you call it 
of corporal and animal faculties be pointed by discretion that is
to say could his vivacity be confined within the pale of but moral
obligations he would be far from being rejectable as a companion for
life 

but i used then to say and i still am of opinion that he wants
a heart and if he does he wants every thing a wrong head may be
convinced may have a right turn given it but who is able to give a
heart if a heart be wanting divine grace working a miracle or next
to a miracle can only change a bad heart should not one fly the man
who is but suspected of such a one what o what do parents do when
they endeavour to force a child's inclination but make her think better
than otherwise she would think of a man obnoxious to themselves and
perhaps whose character will not stand examination 

i have said that i think mr lovelace a vindictive man upon my word i
have sometimes doubted whether his perseverance in his addresses to
me has not been the more obstinate since he has found himself so
disagreeable to my friends from that time i verily think he has
been the more fervent in them yet courts them not but sets them at
defiance for this indeed he pleads disinterestedness  i am sure he
cannot politeness  and the more plausibly as he is apprized of the
ability they have to make it worth his while to court them tis true
he has declared and with too much reason or there would be no bearing
him that the lowest submissions on his part would not be accepted and
to oblige me has offered to seek a reconciliation with them if i would
give him hope of success 

as to his behaviour at church the sunday before last i lay no stress
upon that because i doubt there was too much outward pride in his
intentional humility or shorey who is not his enemy could not have
mistaken it 

i do not think him so deeply learned in human nature or in ethics as
some have thought him don't you remember how he stared at the following
trite observations which every moralist could have furnished him with 
complaining as he did in a half-menacing strain of the obloquies
raised against him that if he were innocent he should despise the
obloquy if not revenge would not wipe off his guilt  that nobody
ever thought of turning a sword into a sponge  that it was in his own
power by reformation of an error laid to his charge by an enemy to make
that enemy one of his best friends and which was the noblest revenge
in the world against his will since an enemy would not wish him to be
without the faults he taxed him with 

but the intention he said was the wound 

how so i asked him when that cannot wound without the application 
that the adversary only held the sword he himself pointed it to his
breast and why should he mortally resent that malice which he might
be the better for as long as he lived  what could be the reading
he has been said to be master of to wonder as he did at these
observations 

but indeed he must take pleasure in revenge and yet holds others to
be inexcusable for the same fault he is not however the only one
who can see how truly blamable those errors are in another which they
hardly think such in themselves 

from these considerations from these over-balances it was that i
said in a former that i would not be in love with this man for the
world and it was going further than prudence would warrant when i was
for compounding with you by the words conditional liking which you so
humourously rally 

well but methinks you say what is all this to the purpose this is
still but reasoning but if you are in love you are and love 
like the vapours is the deeper rooted for having no sufficient cause
assignable for its hold and so you call upon me again to have no
reserves and so-forth 

why then my dear if you will have it i think that with all his
preponderating faults i like him better than i ever thought i should
like him and those faults considered better perhaps than i ought to
like him and i believe it is possible for the persecution i labour
under to induce me to like him still more especially while i can
recollect to his advantage our last interview and as every day produces
stronger instances of tyranny i will call it on the other side in
a word i will frankly own since you cannot think any thing i say too
explicit that were he now but a moral man i would prefer him to all
the men i ever saw 

so that this is but conditional liking still you'll say nor i hope 
is it more i never was in love as it is called and whether this be it 
or not i must submit to you but will venture to think it if it be 
no such mighty monarch no such unconquerable power as i have heard
it represented and it must have met with greater encouragement than
i think i have given it to be absolutely unconquerable since i am
persuaded that i could yet without a throb most willingly give up the
one man to get rid of the other 

but now to be a little more serious with you if my dear my
particularly-unhappy situation had driven or led me if you please 
into a liking of the man and if that liking had in your opinion 
inclined me to love him should you whose mind is susceptible of the
most friendly impressions who have such high notions of the delicacy
which ought to be observed by our sex in these matters and who actually
do enter so deeply into the distresses of one you love should you
have pushed so far that unhappy friend on so very nice a
subject especially when i aimed not as you could prove by fifty
instances it seems to guard against being found out had you rallied
me by word of mouth in the manner you do it might have been more in
character especially if your friend's distresses had been surmounted 
and if she had affected prudish airs in revolving the subject but to
sit down to write it as methinks i see you with a gladdened eye and
with all the archness of exultation indeed my dear and i take notice
of it rather for the sake of your own generosity than for my sake 
for as i have said i love your raillery it is not so very pretty 
the delicacy of the subject and the delicacy of your own mind 
considered 

i lay down my pen here that you may consider of it a little if you
please 


 


i resume to give you my opinion of the force which figure or person
ought to have upon our sex and this i shall do both generally as to the
other sex and particularly as to this man whence you will be able to
collect how far my friends are in the right or in the wrong when
they attribute a good deal of prejudice in favour of one man and in
disfavour of the other on the score of figure but first let me
observe that they see abundant reason on comparing mr lovelace and
mr solmes together to believe that this may be a consideration with
me and therefore they believe it is 

there is certainly something very plausible and attractive as well
as creditable to a woman's choice in figure it gives a favourable
impression at first sight in which we wish to be confirmed and if 
upon further acquaintance we find reason to be so we are pleased with
our judgment and like the person the better for having given us cause
to compliment our own sagacity in our first-sighted impressions but 
nevertheless it has been generally a rule with me to suspect a fine
figure both in man and woman and i have had a good deal of reason
to approve my rule with regard to men especially who ought to value
themselves rather upon their intellectual than personal qualities 
for as to our sex if a fine woman should be led by the opinion of the
world to be vain and conceited upon her form and features and that to
such a degree as to have neglected the more material and more durable
recommendations the world will be ready to excuse her since a pretty
fool in all she says and in all she does will please we know not
why 

but who would grudge this pretty fool her short day since with her
summer's sun when her butterfly flutters are over and the winter
of age and furrows arrives she will feel the just effects of having
neglected to cultivate her better faculties for then lie another
helen she will be unable to bear the reflection even of her own glass 
and being sunk into the insignificance of a mere old woman she will
be entitled to the contempts which follow that character while the
discreet matron who carries up  we will not in such a one's case 
say down  into advanced life the ever-amiable character of virtuous
prudence and useful experience finds solid veneration take place of
airy admiration and more than supply the want of it 

but for a man to be vain of his person how effeminate if such a
one happens to have genius it seldom strikes deep into intellectual
subjects his outside usually runs away with him to adorn and perhaps 
intending to adorn to render ridiculous that person takes up all his
attention all he does is personal that is to say for himself all he
admires is himself and in spite of the correction of the stage which
so often and so justly exposes a coxcomb he usually dwindles down and
sinks into that character and of consequence becomes the scorn of one
sex and the jest of the other 

this is generally the case of your fine figures of men and of those who
value themselves on dress and outward appearance whence it is that i
repeat that mere person in a man is a despicable consideration but
if a man besides figure has learning and such talents as would have
distinguished him whatever were his form then indeed person is an
addition and if he has not run too egregiously into self-admiration 
and if he has preserved his morals he is truly a valuable being 

mr lovelace has certainly taste and as far as i am able to determine 
he has judgment in most of the politer arts but although he has a
humourous way of carrying it off yet one may see that he values himself
not a little both on his person and his parts and even upon his dress 
and yet he has so happy an ease in the latter that it seems to be the
least part of his study and as to the former i should hold myself
inexcusable if i were to add to his vanity by shewing the least regard
for what is too evidently so much his 

and now my dear let me ask you have i come up to your expectation if
i have not when my mind is more at ease i will endeavour to please
you better for methinks my sentences drag my style creeps my
imagination is sunk my spirits serve me not only to tell you that
whether i have more or less i am wholly devoted to the commands of my
dear miss howe 



p s the insolent betty barnes has just now fired me anew by reporting
to me the following expressions of the hideous creature solmes that
he is sure of the coy girl and that with little labour to himself that
be i ever so averse to him beforehand he can depend upon my principles 
and it will be a pleasure to him to see by what pretty degrees i shall
come to   horrid wretch   that it was sir oliver's observation who
knew the world perfectly well that fear was a better security than
love for a woman's good behaviour to her husband although for his
part to such a fine creature  truly  he would try what love would do 
for a few weeks at least being unwilling to believe what the old knight
used to aver that fondness spoils more wives than it makes good 

what think you my dear of such a wretch as this tutored too by that
old surly misogynist as he was deemed sir oliver 




letter xli

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe tuesday march 21 


how willingly would my dear mother shew kindness to me were she
permitted none of this persecution should i labour under i am sure if
that regard were paid to her prudence and fine understanding which they
so well deserve whether owing to her or to my aunt or to both that
a new trial was to be made upon me i cannot tell but this morning her
shorey delivered into my hand the following condescending letter 


my dear girl 

for so i must still call you since dear you may be to me in every
sense of the word we have taken into particular consideration some
hints that fell yesterday from your good norton as if we had not at
mr solmes's first application treated you with that condescension 
wherewith we have in all other instances treated you if it even had
been so my dear you were not excusable to be wanting in your part 
and to set yourself to oppose your father's will in a point which he had
entered too far to recede with honour but all yet may be well on your
single will my child depends all our happiness 

your father permits me to tell you that if you now at last comply with
his expectations all past disobligations shall be buried in oblivion 
as if they had never been but withal that this is the last time that
that grace will be offered you 

i hinted to you you must remember that patterns of the richest silks
were sent for they are come and as they are come your father to shew
how much he is determined will have me send them up to you i could
have wished they might not have accompanied this letter but there is
not great matter in that i must tell you that your delicacy is not
quite so much regarded as i had once thought it deserved to be 


 see letter xx 


these are the newest as well as richest that we could procure 
answerable to our situation in the world answerable to the fortune 
additional to your grandfather's estate designed you and to the noble
settlements agreed upon 

your father intends you six suits three of them dressed suits at his
own expense you have an entire new suit and one besides which i think
you never wore but twice as the new suit is rich if you choose to
make that one of the six your father will present you with an hundred
guineas in lieu 

mr solmes intends to present you with a set of jewels as you have your
grandmother's and your own if you choose to have the former new set 
and to make them serve his present will be made in money a very round
sum which will be given in full property to yourself besides a fine
annual allowance for pin-money as it is called so that your objection
against the spirit of a man you think worse of than it deserves will
have no weight but you will be more independent than a wife of less
discretion than we attribute to you perhaps ought to be you know full
well that i who first and last brought a still larger fortune into the
family than you will carry to mr solmes had not a provision made me
of near this that we have made for you where people marry to their
liking terms are the least things stood upon yet should i be sorry if
you cannot to oblige us all overcome a dislike 

wonder not clary that i write to you thus plainly and freely upon
this subject your behaviour hitherto has been such that we have had no
opportunity of entering minutely into the subject with you yet after
all that has passed between you and me in conversation and between you
and your uncles by letter you have no room to doubt what is to be the
consequence either child we must give up our authority or you your
humour you cannot expect the one we have all the reason in the world
to expect the other you know i have told you more than once that
you must resolve to have mr solmes or never to be looked upon as our
child 

the draught of the settlement you may see whenever you will we think
there can be no room for objection to any of the articles there is
still more in them in our family's favour than was stipulated at first 
when your aunt talked of them to you more so indeed than we
could have asked if upon perusal of them you think any alteration
necessary it shall be made do my dear girl send to me within this
day or two or rather ask me for the perusal of them 

as a certain person's appearance at church so lately and what he gives
out every where makes us extremely uneasy and as that uneasiness will
continue while you are single you must not wonder that a short day
is intended this day fortnight we design it to be if you have no
objection to make that i shall approve of but if you determine as we
would have you and signify it to us we shall not stand with you for a
week or so 

your sightlines of person may perhaps make some think this alliance
disparaging but i hope you will not put such a personal value upon
yourself if you do it will indeed be the less wonder that person
should weigh with you however weak the consideration in another man 

thus we parents in justice ought to judge that our two daughters are
equally dear and valuable to us if so why should clarissa think that
a disparagement which arabella would not nor we for her have thought
any had the address been made to her you will know what i mean by
this without my explaining myself farther 

signify to us now therefore your compliance with our wishes and then
there is an end of your confinement an act of oblivion as i may call
it shall pass upon all your former refractoriness and you will once
more make us happy in you and in one another you may in this case 
directly come down to your father and me in his study where we will
give you our opinions of the patterns with our hearty forgiveness and
blessings 

come be a good child as you used to be my clarissa i have
 notwithstanding your past behaviour and the hopelessness which some
have expressed in your compliance undertaken this one time more for
you discredit not my hopes my dear girl i have promised never more
to interfere between your father and you if this my most earnest
application succeed not i expect you down love your father expects
you down but be sure don't let him see any thing uncheerful in your
compliance if you come i will clasp you to my fond heart with as much
pleasure as ever i pressed you to it in my whole life you don't know
what i have suffered within these few weeks past nor ever will be able
to guess till you come to be in my situation which is that of a fond
and indulgent mother praying night and day and struggling to preserve 
against the attempts of more ungovernable spirits the peace and union
of her family 

but you know the terms come not near us if you have resolve to be
undutiful but this after what i have written i hope you cannot be 

if you come directly and as i have said cheerfully as if your heart
were in your duty and you told me it was free you know i shall
then as i said give you the most tender proofs how much i am

your truly affectionate mother 


 


think for me my dearest friend how i must be affected by this letter 
the contents of it is so surprisingly terrifying yet so sweetly
urged o why cried i to myself am i obliged to undergo this
severe conflict between a command that i cannot obey and language so
condescendingly moving could i have been sure of being struck dead
at the alter before the ceremony had given the man i hate a title to my
vows i think i could have submitted to having been led to it but to
think of living with and living for a man one abhors what a sad thing
is that 

and then how could the glare of habit and ornament be supposed any
inducement to one who has always held that the principal view of a
good wife in the adorning of her person ought to be to preserve the
affection of her husband and to do credit to his choice and that she
should be even fearful of attracting the eyes of others in this view 
must not the very richness of the patterns add to my disgusts great
encouragement indeed to think of adorning one's self to be the wife of
mr solmes 

upon the whole it was not possible for me to go down upon the
prescribed condition do you think it was and to write if my letter
would have been read what could i write that would be admitted and
after what i had written and said to so little effect 

i walked backward and forward i threw down with disdain the patterns 
now to my closet retired i then quitting it threw myself upon the
settee then upon this chair then upon that then into one window then
into another i knew not what to do and while i was in this suspense 
having again taken up the letter to re-peruse it betty came in 
reminding me by order that my papa and mamma waited for me in my
father's study 

tell my mamma said i that i beg the favour of seeing her here for one
moment or to permit me to attend her any where by herself 

i listened at the stairs-head you see my dear how it is cried
my father very angrily all your condescension as your indulgence
heretofore is thrown away you blame your son's violence as you call
it  i had some pleasure in hearing this  but nothing else will do with
her you shall not see her alone is my presence an exception to the
bold creature 

tell her said my mother to betty she knows upon what terms she may
come down to us nor will i see her upon any other 

the maid brought me this answer i had recourse to my pen and ink but
i trembled so that i could not write nor knew what to say had i
steadier fingers at last betty brought me these lines from my father 


undutiful and perverse clarissa 

no condescension i see will move you your mother shall not see you 
nor will i prepare however to obey you know our pleasure your uncle
antony your brother and your sister and your favourite mrs norton 
shall see the ceremony performed privately at your uncle's chapel and
when mr solmes can introduce you to us in the temper we wish to behold
you in we may perhaps forgive his wife although we never can in
any other character our perverse daughter as it will be so privately
performed clothes and equipage may be provided for afterwards so
prepare to go to your uncle's for an early day in next week we will not
see you till all is over and we will have it over the sooner in order
to shorten the time of your deserved confinement and our own trouble in
contending with such a rebel as you have been of late i will hear no
pleas i will receive no letter nor expostulation nor shall you hear
from me any more till you have changed your name to my liking this from

your incensed father 


if this resolution be adhered to then will my father never see me
more for i will never be the wife of that solmes i will die first 


tuesday evening 


he this solmes came hither soon after i had received my father's
letter he sent up to beg leave to wait upon me i wonder at his
assurance 

i said to betty who brought me this message let him restore an unhappy
creature to her father and mother and then i may hear what he has to
say but if my friends will not see me on his account i will not see
him upon his own 

i hope miss said betty you will not send me down with this answer he
is with you papa and mamma 

i am driven to despair said i i cannot be used worse i will not see
him 

down she went with my answer she pretended it seems to be loth to
repeat it so was commanded out of her affected reserves and gave it in
its full force 

o how i heard my father storm 

they were altogether it seems in his study my brother was for
having me turned out of the house that moment to lovelace and my evil
destiny my mother was pleased to put in a gentle word for me i know
not what it was but thus she was answered my dear this is the most
provoking thing in the world in a woman of your good sense to love a
rebel as well as if she were dutiful what encouragement for duty
is this have i not loved her as well as ever you did and why am i
changed would to the lord your sex knew how to distinguish it is
plain that she relies upon her power over you the fond mother ever
made a hardened child 

she was pleased however to blame betty as the wench owned for giving
my answer its full force but my father praised her for it 

the wench says that he would have come up in his wrath at my refusing
to see mr solmes had not my brother and sister prevailed upon him to
the contrary 

i wish he had and were it not for his own sake that he had killed
me 

mr solmes condescended  i am mightily obliged to him truly   to plead
for me 

they are all in tumults how it will end i know not i am quite weary
of life so happy till within these few weeks so miserable now 

well indeed might my mother say that i should have severe trials 


 see letter xxv 


p s the idiot  such a one am i treated like   is begged as i may say 
by my brother and sister they have desired that i may be consigned
over entirely to their management if it be granted  it is granted 
on my father's part i understand but not yet on my mother's   what
cruelty may i not expect from their envy jealousy and ill-will i
shall soon see by its effects if i am to be so consigned this is a
written intimation privately dropt in my wood-house walk by my cousin
dolly hervey the dear girl longs to see me she tells me but is
forbidden till she see me as mrs solmes or as consenting to be his i
will take example by their perseverance indeed i will 




letter xlii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


an angry dialogue a scolding-bout rather has passed between my sister
and me did you think i could scold my dear 

she was sent up to me upon my refusal to see mr solmes let loose
upon me i think no intention on their parts to conciliate it seems
evident that i am given up to my brother and her by general consent 

i will do justice to every thing she said against me which carried any
force with it as i ask for your approbation or disapprobation of my
conduct upon the facts i lay before you i should think it the sign of
a very bad cause if i endeavoured to mislead my judge 

she began with representing to me the danger i had been in had my
father come up as he would have done had he not been hindered by
mr solmes among the rest she reflected upon my norton as if she
encouraged me in my perverseness she ridiculed me for my supposed
esteem for mr lovelace was surprised that the witty the prudent nay 
the dutiful and pi ous  so she sneeringly pronounced the word  clarissa
harlowe should be so strangely fond of a profligate man that her
parents were forced to lock her up in order to hinder her from running
into his arms let me ask you my dear said she how you now keep
your account of the disposition of your time how many hours in the
twenty-four do you devote to your needle how many to your prayers 
how many to letter-writing and how many to love i doubt i doubt my
little dear was her arch expression the latter article is like aaron's
rod and swallows up the rest tell me is it not so 

to these i answered that it was a double mortification to me to owe
my safety from the effects of my father's indignation to a man i could
never thank for any thing i vindicated the good mrs norton with a
warmth that was due to her merit with equal warmth i resented her
reflections upon me on mr lovelace's account as to the disposition of
my time in the twenty-four hours i told her it would better have become
her to pity a sister in distress than to exult over her especially 
when i could too justly attribute to the disposition of some of her
wakeful hours no small part of that distress 

she raved extremely at this last hint but reminded me of the gentle
treatment of all my friends my mother's in particular before it
came to this she said that i had discovered a spirit they never had
expected that if they had thought me such a championess they would
hardly have ventured to engage with me but that now the short and the
long of it was that the matter had gone too far to be given up that it
was become a contention between duty and willfulness whether a parent's
authority were to yield to a daughter's obstinacy or the contrary that
i must therefore bend or break that was all child 

i told her that i wished the subject were of such a nature that i
could return her pleasantry with equal lightness of heart but that if
mr solmes had such merit in every body's eyes in hers particularly 
why might he not be a brother to me rather than a husband 

o child says she methinks you are as pleasant to the full as i am 
i begin to have some hopes of you now but do you think i will rob my
sister of her humble servant had he first addressed himself to me 
proceeded she something might have been said but to take my younger
sister's refusal no no child it is not come to that neither 
besides that would be to leave the door open in your heart for you know
who child and we would fain bar him out if possible in short  and
then she changed both her tone and her looks  had i been as forward
as somebody to throw myself into the arms of one of the greatest
profligates in england who had endeavoured to support his claim to me
through the blood of my brother then might all my family join together
to save me from such a wretch and to marry me as fast as they could 
to some worthy man who might opportunely offer himself and now clary 
all's out and make the most of it 

did not this deserve a severe return do say it did to justify my
reply alas for my poor sister said i the man was not always so
great a profligate how true is the observation that unrequited love
turns to deepest hate 

i thought she would beat me but i proceeded i have heard often of my
brother's danger and my brother's murderer when so little ceremony is
made with me why should i not speak out did he not seek to kill the
other if he could have done it would my brother have given lovelace
his life had it been in his power the aggressor should not
complain and as to opportune offers would to heaven some one
had offered opportunely to somebody it is not my fault bella the
opportune gentleman don't come 

could you my dear have shewn more spirit i expected to feel the
weight of her hand she did come up to me with it held up then 
speechless with passion ran half way down the stairs and came up
again 

when she could speak god give me patience with you 

amen said i but you see bella how ill you bear the retort you
provoke will you forgive me and let me find a sister in you as i am
sorry if you had reason to think me unsisterly in what i have said 

then did she pour upon me with greater violence considering my
gentleness as a triumph of temper over her she was resolved she said 
to let every body know how i took the wicked lovelace's part against my
brother 

i wished i told her i could make the plea for myself which she
might for herself to wit that my anger was more inexcusable than my
judgment but i presumed she had some other view in coming to me than
she had hitherto acquainted me with let me said i but know after
all that has passed if you have any thing to propose that i can comply
with any thing that can make my only sister once more my friend 

i had before upon hearing her ridiculing me on my supposed character of
meekness said that although i wished to be thought meek i would not
be abject although humble not mean and here in a sneering way she
cautioned me on that head 

i replied that her pleasantry was much more agreeable than her anger 
but i wished she would let me know the end of a visit that had hitherto
 between us been so unsisterly 

she desired to be informed in the name of every body was her word 
what i was determined upon and whether to comply or not one word for
all my friends were not to have patience with so perverse a creature
for ever 

this then i told her i would do absolutely break with the man they were
all so determined against upon condition however that neither mr 
solmes nor any other were urged upon me with the force of a command 

and what was this more than i had offered before what but ringing
my changes upon the same bells and neither receding nor advancing one
tittle 

if i knew what other proposals i could make i told her that would
be acceptable to them all and free me from the address of a man so
disagreeable to me i would make them i had indeed before offered 
never to marry without my father's consent 

she interrupted me that was because i depended upon my whining tricks
to bring my father and mother to what i pleased 

a poor dependence i said she knew those who would make that
dependence vain 

and i should have brought them to my own beck very probably and my
uncle harlowe too as also my aunt hervey had i not been forbidden from
their sight and thereby hindered from playing my pug's tricks before
them 

at least bella said i you have hinted to me to whom i am obliged 
that my father and mother and every body else treat me thus harshly 
but surely you make them all very weak indifferent persons judging of
us two from what you say would either think me a very artful creature 
or you a very spiteful one 

you are indeed a very artful one for that matter interrupted she in
a passion one of the artfullest i ever knew and then followed an
accusation so low so unsisterly that i half-bewitched people by my
insinuating address that nobody could be valued or respected but must
stand like ciphers wherever i came how often said she have i and my
brother been talking upon a subject and had every body's attention 
till you came in with your bewitching meek pride and humble
significance and then have we either been stopped by references to miss
clary's opinion forsooth or been forced to stop ourselves or must
have talked on unattended to by every body 

she paused dear bella proceed 

she indeed seemed only gathering breath 

and so i will said she did you not bewitch my grandfather could any
thing be pleasing to him that you did not say or do how did he use
to hang till he slabbered again poor doting old man on your silver
tongue yet what did you say that we could not have said what did you
do that we did not endeavour to do and what was all this for why 
truly his last will shewed what effect your smooth obligingness had
upon him to leave the acquired part of his estate from the next heirs 
his own sons to a grandchild to his youngest grandchild a daughter
too to leave the family-pictures from his sons to you because you
could tiddle about them and though you now neglect their examples 
could wipe and clean them with your dainty hands the family-plate too 
in such quantities of two or three generations standing must not be
changed because his precious child humouring his old fal-lal taste 
admired it to make it all her own 


 alluding to his words in the preamble to the clauses in
 his will see letter iv 


this was too low to move me o my poor sister said i not to be able 
or at least willing to distinguish between art and nature if i did
oblige i was happy in it i looked for no further reward my mind is
above art from the dirty motives you mention i wish with all my heart
my grandfather had not thus distinguished me he saw my brother likely
to be amply provided for out of the family as well as in it he desired
that you might have the greater share of my father's favour for it 
and no doubt but you both have you know bella that the estate my
grandfather bequeathed me was not half the real estate he left 

what's all that to an estate in possession and left you with such
distinctions as gave you a reputation of greater value than the estate
itself 

hence my misfortune bella in your envy i doubt but have i not given
up that possession in the best manner i could 

yes interrupting me she hated me for that best manner specious little
witch she called me your best manner so full of art and design had
never been seen through if you with your blandishing ways have not
been put out of sight and reduced to positive declarations hindered
from playing your little declarations hindered from playing your
little whining tricks curling like a serpent about your mamma and
making her cry to deny you any thing your little obstinate heart was set
upon 

obstinate heart bella 

yes obstinate heart for did you ever give up any thing had you not
the art to make them think all was right you asked though my brother
and i were frequently refused favours of no greater import 

i know not bella that i ever asked any thing unfit to be granted i
seldom asked favours for myself but for others 

i was a reflecting creature for this 

all you speak of bella was a long time ago i cannot go so far back
into our childish follies little did i think of how long standing your
late-shewn antipathy is 

i was a reflector again such a saucy meekness such a best manner and
such venom in words o clary clary thou wert always a two-faced girl 

nobody thought i had two faces when i gave up all into my father's
management taking from his bounty as before all my little
pocket-money without a shilling addition to my stipend or desiring
it 

yes cunning creature and that was another of your fetches for did
it not engage my fond father as no doubt you thought it would to tell
you that since you had done so grateful and dutiful a thing he would
keep entire for your use all the produce of the estate left you and
be but your steward in it and that you should be entitled to the same
allowances as before another of your hook-in's clary so that all
your extravagancies have been supported gratis 

my extravagancies bella but did my father ever give me any thing he
did not give you 

yes indeed i got more by that means than i should have had the
conscience to ask but i have still the greater part to shew but you 
what have you to shew i dare say not fifty pieces in the world 

indeed i have not 

i believe you your mamma norton i suppose but mum for that 

unworthy bella the good woman although low in circumstance is great
in mind much greater than those who would impute meanness to a soul
incapable of it 

what then have you done with the sums given you from infancy to
squander let me ask you  affecting archness  has has has lovelace 
has your rake put it out at interest for you 

o that my sister would not make me blush for her it is however out at
interest and i hope it will bring me interest upon interest better
than to lie useless in my cabinet 

she understood me she said were i a man she should suppose i was
aiming to carry the county popularity a crowd to follow me with their
blessings as i went to and from church and nobody else to be regarded 
were agreeable things house-top-proclamations i hid not my light under
a bushel she would say that for me but was it not a little hard upon
me to be kept from blazing on a sunday and to be hindered from my
charitable ostentations 

this indeed bella is cruel in you who have so largely contributed to
my confinement but go on you'll be out of breath by-and-by i cannot
wish to be able to return this usage poor bella and i believe i
smiled a little too contemptuously for a sister to a sister 

none of your saucy contempts  rising in her voice  none of your poor
bella's with that air of superiority in a younger sister 

well then rich bella courtesying that will please you better and it
is due likewise to the hoards you boast of 

look ye clary holding up her hand if you are not a little more abject
in your meekness a little more mean in your humility and treat me with
the respect due to an elder sister you shall find 

not that you will treat me worse than you have done bella that cannot
be unless you were to let fall your uplifted hand upon me and that
would less become you to do than me to bear 

good meek creature but you were upon your overtures just now i
shall surprise every body by tarrying so long they will think some good
may be done with you and supper will be ready 

a tear would stray down my cheek how happy have i been said i 
sighing in the supper-time conversations with all my dear friends in
my eye round their hospitable board 

i met only with insult for this bella has not a feeling heart the
highest joy in this life she is not capable of but then she saves
herself many griefs by her impenetrableness yet for ten times the
pain that such a sensibility is attended with would i not part with the
pleasure it brings with it 

she asked me upon my turning from her if she should not say any thing
below of my compliances 

you may say that i will do every thing they would have me do if they
will free me from mr solmes's address 

this is all you desire at present creeper on insinuator  what words
she has   but will not t'other man flame out and roar most horribly 
upon the snatching from his paws a prey he thought himself sure of 

i must let you talk in your own way or we shall never come to a point 
i shall not matter in his roaring as you call it i will promise him 
that if i ever marry any other man it shall not be till he is married 
and if he be not satisfied with such a condescension i shall think he
ought and i will give any assurances that i will neither correspond
with him nor see him surely this will do 

but i suppose then you will have no objection to see and converse on a
civil footing with mr solmes as your father's friend or so 

no i must be permitted to retire to my apartment whenever he comes 
i would no more converse with the one than correspond with the other 
that would be to make mr lovelace guilty of some rashness on a belief 
that i broke with him to have mr solmes 

and so that wicked wretch is to be allowed such a controul over you 
that you are not to be civil to your father's friends at his own house 
for fear of incensing him when this comes to be represented be so
good as to tell me what is it you expect from it 

every thing i said or nothing as she was pleased to represent it be
so good as to give it your interest bella and say further that
i will by any means i can in the law or otherwise make over to my
father to my uncles or even to my brother all i am entitled to by my
grandfather's will as a security for the performance of my promises 
and as i shall have no reason to expect any favour from my father if i
break them i shall not be worth any body's having and further
still unkindly as my brother has used me i will go down to scotland
privately as his housekeeper  i now see i may be spared here  if he
will promise to treat me no worse than he would do an hired one or
i will go to florence to my cousin morden if his stay in italy will
admit of it in either case it may be given out that i am gone to the
other or to the world's end i care not whither it is said i am gone 
or do go 

let me ask you child if you will give your pretty proposal in writing 

yes with all my heart and i stepped to my closet and wrote to the
purpose i have mentioned and moreover the following lines to my
brother 


my dear brother 

i hope i have made such proposals to my sister as will be accepted i am
sure they will if you please to give them your sanction let me beg
of you for god's sake that you will i think myself very unhappy in
having incurred your displeasure no sister can love a brother better
than i love you pray do not put the worst but the best constructions
upon my proposals when you have them reported to you indeed i mean the
best i have no subterfuges no arts no intentions but to keep to the
letter of them you shall yourself draw up every thing into writing as
strong as you can and i will sign it and what the law will not do to
enforce it my resolution and my will shall so that i shall be worth
nobody's address that has not my papa's consent nor shall any person 
nor any consideration induce me to revoke it you can do more than any
body to reconcile my parents and uncles to me let me owe this desirable
favour to your brotherly interposition and you will for ever oblige

your afflicted sister cl harlowe 


 


and how do you think bella employed herself while i was writing why 
playing gently upon my harpsichord and humming to it to shew her
unconcernedness 

when i approached her with what i had written she arose with an air
of levity why love you have not written already you have i
protest o what a ready penwoman and may i read it 

if you please and let me beseech you my dear bella to back these
proposals with your good offices and  folding my uplifted hands tears 
i believe standing in my eyes  i will love you as never sister loved
another 

thou art a strange creature said she there is no withstanding thee 

she took the proposals and letter and having read them burst into an
affected laugh how wise ones may be taken in then you did not know 
that i was jesting with you all this time and so you would have me
carry down this pretty piece of nonsense 

don't let me be surprised at your seeming unsisterliness bella i hope
it is but seeming there can be no wit in such jesting as this 

the folly of the creature how natural is it for people when they set
their hearts upon any thing to think every body must see with their
eyes pray dear child what becomes of your father's authority
here who stoops here the parent or the child how does this square
with engagements actually agreed upon between your father and mr 
solmes what security that your rake will not follow you to the world's
end nevertheless that you may not think that i stand in the way of
a reconciliation on such fine terms as these i will be your messenger
this once and hear what my papa will say to it although beforehand i
can tell you these proposals will not answer the principal end 

so down she went but it seems my aunt hervey and my uncle harlowe
were not gone away and as they have all engaged to act in concert 
messengers were dispatched to my uncle and aunt to desire them to be
there to breakfast in the morning 


monday night eleven o'clock 


i am afraid i shall not be thought worthy 

just as i began to fear i should not be thought worthy of an answer 
betty rapped at my door and said if i were not in bed she had a
letter for me i had but just done writing the above dialogue and stept
to the door with the pen in my hand always writing miss said the
bold wench it is admirable how you can get away what you write but the
fairies they say are always at hand to help lovers she retired in
so much haste that had i been disposed i could not take the notice of
this insolence which it deserved 

i enclose my brother's letter he was resolved to let me see that i
should have nothing to expect from his kindness but surely he will
not be permitted to carry every point the assembling of my friends
to-morrow is a good sign and i will hope something from that and from
proposals so reasonable and now i will try if any repose will fall to
my lot for the remainder of this night 


to miss clary harlowe  enclosed in the preceding  

your proposals will be considered by your father and mother and
all your friends to-morrow morning what trouble does your shameful
forwardness give us all i wonder you have the courage to write to me 
upon whom you are so continually emptying your whole female quiver i
have no patience with you for reflecting upon me as the aggressor in a
quarrel which owed its beginning to my consideration for you 

you have made such confessions in a villain's favour as ought to cause
all your relations to renounce you for ever for my part i will
not believe any woman in the world who promises against her avowed
inclination to put it out of your power to ruin yourself is the only
way left to prevent your ruin i did not intend to write but your
too-kind sister has prevailed upon me as to your going to scotland 
that day of grace is over nor would i advise that you should go to
grandfather-up your cousin morden besides that worthy gentleman might
be involved in some fatal dispute upon your account and then be called
the aggressor 

a fine situation you have brought yourself to to propose to hide
yourself from your rake and to have falsehoods told to conceal
you your confinement at this rate is the happiest thing that could
befal you your bravo's behaviour at church looking out for you is a
sufficient indication of his power over you had you not so shamelessly
acknowledged it 

one word for all your parents and uncles may do as they will but if 
for the honour of the family i cannot carry this point i will retire
to scotland and never see the face of any one of it more 

james harlowe 


 


there's a brother there's flaming duty to a father and mother and
uncles but he sees himself valued and made of consequence and he
gives himself airs accordingly nevertheless as i said above i will
hope better things from those who have not the interest my brother has
to keep open these unhappy differences 




letter xliii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe tuesday march 21 


would you not have thought my dear miss howe as well as i that my
proposal must have been accepted and that my brother by the last
article of his unbrotherly letter where he threatens to go to scotland
if it should be hearkened to was of opinion that it would 

for my part after i had read the unkind letter over and over 
i concluded upon the whole that a reconciliation upon terms so
disadvantageous to myself as hardly any other person in my case i
dare say would have proposed must be the result of this morning's
conference and in that belief i had begun to give myself new trouble in
thinking this difficulty over how i should be able to pacify lovelace
on that part of my engagement by which i undertook to break off all
correspondence with him unless my friends should be brought by the
interposition of his powerful friends and any offers they might make 
 which it was rather his part to suggest than mine to intimate to
change their minds 

thus was i employed not very agreeably you may believe because of the
vehemence of the tempers i had to conflict with when breakfasting-time
approached and my judges began to arrive 

and oh how my heart fluttered on hearing the chariot of the one 
and then of the other rattle through the court-yard and the
hollow-sounding foot-step giving notice of each person's stepping out 
to take his place on the awful bench which my fancy had formed for them
and my other judges 

that thought i is my aunt hervey's that my uncle harlowe's now comes
my uncle antony and my imagination made a fourth chariot for the odious
solmes although it happened he was not there 

and now thought i are they all assembled and now my brother calls
upon my sister to make her report now the hard-hearted bella interlards
her speech with invective now has she concluded her report now they
debate upon it now does my brother flame now threaten to go to
scotland now is he chidden and now soothed 

and then i ran through the whole conference in my imagination forming
speeches for this person and that pro and con till all concluded as
i flattered myself in an acceptance of my conditions and in giving
directions to have an instrument drawn to tie me up to my good
behaviour while i supposed all agreed to give solmes a wife every way
more worthy of him and with her the promise of my grandfather's estate 
in case of my forfeiture or dying unmarried on the righteous condition
he proposes to entitle himself to it with me 

and now thought i am i to be ordered down to recognize my own
proposals and how shall i look upon my awful judges how shall i stand
the questions of some the set surliness of others the returning love
of one or two how greatly shall i be affected 

then i wept then i dried my eyes then i practised at my glass for a
look more cheerful than my heart 

and now  as any thing stirred  is my sister coming to declare the issue
of all tears gushing again my heart fluttering as a bird against its
wires drying my eyes again and again to no purpose 

and thus my nancy  excuse the fanciful prolixity   was i employed and
such were my thoughts and imaginations when i found a very different
result from the hopeful conference 

for about ten o'clock up came my sister with an air of cruel triumph 
waving her hand with a light flourish 

obedience without reserve is required of you clary my papa is justly
incensed that you should presume to dispute his will and to make
conditions with him he knows what is best for you and as you own
matters are gone a great way between this hated lovelace and you 
they will believe nothing you say except you will give the one only
instance that will put them out of doubt of the sincerity of your
promises 

what child are you surprised cannot you speak then it seems you
had expected a different issue had you strange that you could with
all your acknowledgements and confessions so creditable to your noted
prudence 

i was indeed speechless for some time my eyes were even fixed and
ceased to flow but upon the hard-hearted bella's proceeding with her
airs of insult indeed i was mistaken said i indeed i was for in
you bella i expected i hoped for a sister 

what interrupted she with all your mannerly flings and your despising
airs did you expect that i was capable of telling stories for you did
you think that when i was asked my own opinion of the sincerity of your
declarations i could not tell tem how far matters had gone between you
and your fellow when the intention is to bend that stubborn will of
yours to your duty do you think i would deceive them do you think i
would encourage them to call you down to contradict all that i should
have invented in your favour 

well well bella i am the less obliged to you that's all i was
willing to think that i had still a brother and sister but i find i am
mistaken 

pretty mopsy-eyed soul was her expression and was it willing to
think it had still a brother and sister and why don't you go on clary 
 mocking my half-weeping accent  i thought i had a father and mother 
two uncles and an aunt but i am mis taken that's all come clary 
say this and it will in part be true because you have thrown off all
their authority and because you respect one vile wretch more than them
all 

how have i deserved this at your hands sister but i will only say i
pity you 

and with that disdainful air too clary none of that bridled neck 
none of your scornful pity girl i beseech you 

this sort of behaviour is natural to you surely bella what new
talents does it discover in you but proceed if it be a pleasure to
you proceed bella and since i must not pity you i will pity myself 
for nobody else will 

because you don't said she 

hush bella interrupting her because i don't deserve it i know you
were going to say so i will say as you say in every thing and that's
the way to please you 

then say lovelace is a villain 

so i will when i think him so 

then you don't think him so 

indeed i don't you did not always bella 

and what clary mean you by that  bristling up to me  tell me what
you mean by that reflection 

tell me why you call it a reflection what did i say 

thou art a provoking creature but what say you to two or three duels of
that wretch's 

i can't tell what to say unless i knew the occasions 

do you justify duelling at all 

i do not neither can i help his duelling 

will you go down and humble that stubborn spirit of yours to your
mamma 

i said nothing 

shall i conduct your ladyship down  offering to take my declined hand  

what not vouchsafe to answer me 

i turned from her in silence 

what turn your back upon me too shall i bring up your mamma to you 
love  following me and taking my struggling hand  what not speak yet 
come my sullen silent dear speak one word to me you must say two
very soon to mr solmes i can tell you that 

then  gushing into tears which i could not hold in longer  they shall
be the last words i will ever speak 

well well  insultingly wiping my averted face with her handkerchief 
while her other hand held mine in a ridiculing tone   i am glad any
thing will make thee speak then you think you may be brought to speak
the two words only they are to be the last how like a gentle lovyer
from its tender bleeding heart was that 

ridiculous bella 

saucy clary  changing her sneering tone to an imperious one  but do you
think you can humble yourself to go down to your mamma 

i am tired of such stuff as this tell me bella if my mamma will
condescend to see me 

yes if you can be dutiful at last 

i can i will 

but what call you dutiful 

to give up my own inclinations that's something more for you to tell
of in obedience to my parents' commands and to beg that i may not be
made miserable with a man that is fitter for any body than for me 

for me do you mean clary 

why not since you have put the question you have a better opinion of
him than i have my friends i hope would not think him too good for
me and not good enough for you but cannot you tell me bella what
is to become of me without insulting over me thus if i must be thus
treated remember that if i am guilty of any rashness the usage i meet
with will justify it 

so clary you are contriving an excuse i find for somewhat that we
have not doubted has been in your head a great while 

if it were so you seem resolved for your part and so does my brother
for his that i shall not want one but indeed bella i can bear no
longer this repetition of the worst part of yesterday's conversation 
i desire i may throw myself at my father's and mother's feet and hear
from them what their sentence is i shall at least avoid by that means 
the unsisterly insults i meet with from you 

hey-day what is this you is it you my meek sister clary 

yes it is i bella and i will claim the protection due to a child of
the family or to know why i am to be thus treated when i offer only to
preserve to myself the liberty of refusal which belongs to my sex and 
to please my parents would give up my choice i have contented myself
till now to take second-hand messengers and first-hand insults you are
but my sister my brother is not my sovereign and while i have a father
and mother living i will not be thus treated by a brother and sister 
and their servants all setting upon me as it should seem to make me
desperate and do a rash thing i will know in short sister bella 
why i am to be constrained thus what is intended by it and whether i
am to be considered as a child or a slave 

she stood aghast all this time partly with real partly with affected 
surprise 

and is it you is it indeed you well clary you amaze me but since
you are so desirous to refer yourself to your father and mother i will
go down and tell them what you say your friends are not yet gone 
i believe they shall assemble again and then you may come down and
plead your own cause in person 

let me then but let my brother and you be absent you have made
yourselves too much parties against me to sit as my judges and i
desire to have none of yours or his interpositions i am sure you could
not have represented what i proposed fairly i am sure you could not 
nor is it possible you should be commissioned to treat me thus 

well well i'll call up my brother to you i will indeed he shall
justify himself as well as me 

i desire not to see my brother except he will come as a brother laying
aside the authority he has unjustly assumed over me 

and so clary it is nothing to him or to me is it that our sister
shall disgrace her whole family 

as how bella disgrace it the man whom you thus freely treat is a
man of birth and fortune he is a man of parts and nobly allied he
was once thought worthy of you and i wish to heaven you had had him 
i am sure it was not thus my fault you had not although you treat me
thus 

this set her into a flame i wish i had forborne it o how the poor
bella raved i thought she would have beat me once or twice and she
vowed her fingers itched to do so but i was not worth her anger yet
she flamed on 

we were heard to be high and betty came up from my mother to command
my sister to attend her she went down accordingly threatening me with
letting every one know what a violent creature i had shewn myself to be 


tuesday noon march 21 


i have as yet heard no more of my sister and have not courage enough
to insist upon throwing myself at the feet of my father and mother as i
thought in my heat of temper i should be able to do and i am now grown
as calm as ever and were bella to come up again as fit to be played
upon as before 

i am indeed sorry that i sent her from me in such disorder but my
papa's letter threatening me with my uncle antony's house and chapel 
terrifies me strangely and by their silence i'm afraid some new storm
is gathering 

but what shall i do with this lovelace i have just now but the
unsuspected hole in the wall that i told you of in my letter by hannah 
got a letter from him so uneasy is he for fear i should be prevailed
upon in solmes's favour so full of menaces if i am so resenting
the usage i receive  for how i cannot tell but he has undoubtedly
intelligence of all that is done in the family  such protestations of
inviolable faith and honour such vows of reformation such pressing
arguments to escape from this disgraceful confinement o my nancy what
shall i do with this lovelace 




letter xliv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wenesday morning nine o'clock 


my aunt hervey lay here last night and is but just gone from me she
came up to me with my sister they would not trust my aunt without this
ill-natured witness when she entered my chamber i told her that this
visit was a high favour to a poor prisoner in her hard confinement 
i kissed her hand she kindly saluting me said why this distance to
your aunt my dear who loves you so well 

she owned that she came to expostulate with me for the peace-sake of
the family for that she could not believe it possible if i did not
conceive myself unkindly treated that i who had ever shewn such a
sweetness of temper as well as manners should be thus resolute in a
point so very near to my father and all my friends my mother and she
were both willing to impute my resolution to the manner i had been begun
with and to my supposing that my brother had originally more of a hand
in the proposals made by mr solmes than my father or other friends in
short fain would my aunt have furnished me with an excuse to come off
my opposition bell all the while humming a tune and opening this book
and that without meaning but saying nothing 

after having shewed me that my opposition could not be of
signification my father's honour being engaged my aunt concluded with
enforcing upon me my duty in stronger terms than i believe she would
have done the circumstances of the case considered had not my sister
been present 

it would be repeating what i have so often mentioned to give you the
arguments that passed on both sides so i will only recite what she was
pleased to say that carried with it a new face 

when she found me inflexible as she was pleased to call it she said 
for her part she could not but say that if i were not to have either
mr solmes or mr lovelace and yet to make my friends easy must
marry she should not think amiss of mr wyerley what did i think of
mr wyerley 

ay clary put in my sister what say you to mr wyerley 

i saw through this immediately it was said on purpose i doubted
not to have an argument against me of absolute prepossession in mr 
lovelace's favour since mr wyerley every where avows his value even
to veneration for me and is far less exceptionable both in person and
mind than mr solmes and i was willing to turn the tables by trying
how far mr solmes's terms might be dispensed with since the same terms
could not be expected from mr wyerley 

i therefore desired to know whether my answer if it should be in
favour of mr wyerley would release me from mr solmes for i owned 
that i had not the aversion to him that i had to the other 

nay she had no commission to propose such a thing she only knew that
my father and mother would not be easy till mr lovelace's hopes were
entirely defeated 

cunning creature said my sister 

and this and her joining in the question before convinced me that it
was a designed snare for me 

don't you dear madam said i put questions that can answer no end but
to support my brother's schemes against me but are there any hopes
of an end to my sufferings and disgrace without having this hated man
imposed upon me will not what i have offered be accepted i am sure it
ought i will venture to say that 

why niece if there be not any such hopes i presume you don't think
yourself absolved from the duty due from a child to her parents 

yes said my sister i do not doubt but it is miss clary's aim if she
does not fly to her lovelace to get her estate into her own hands and
go to live at the grove in that independence upon which she builds all
her perverseness and dear heart my little love how will you then
blaze away your mamma norton your oracle with your poor at your
gates mingling so proudly and so meanly with the ragged herd 
reflecting by your ostentation upon all the ladies in the county 
who do not as you do this is known to be your scheme and the poor
without-doors and lovelace within with one hand building up a name 
pulling it down with the other o what a charming scheme is this but
let me tell you my pretty little flighty one that your father's living
will shall controul your grandfather's dead one and that estate will be
disposed of as your fond grandfather would have disposed of it had he
lived to see such a change in his favourite in a word miss it will be
kept out of your hands till my father sees you discreet enough to have
the management of it or till you can dutifully by law tear it from
him 

fie miss harlowe said my aunt this is not pretty to your sister 

o madam let her go on this is nothing to what i have borne from miss
harlowe she is either commissioned to treat me ill by her envy or by
an higher authority to which i must submit as to revoking the estate 
what hinders if i pleased i know my power but have not the least
thought of exerting it be pleased to let my father know that whatever
be the consequence to myself were he to turn me out of doors which
i should rather he would do than to be confined and insulted as i am 
and were i to be reduced to indigence and want i would seek no relief
that should be contrary to his will 

for that matter child said my aunt were you to marry you must do as
your husband will have you if that husband be mr lovelace he will be
glad of any opportunity of further embroiling the families and let
me tell you niece if he had the respect for you which he pretends to
have he would not throw out defiances as he does he is known to be a
very revengeful man and were i you miss clary i should be afraid he
would wreak upon me that vengeance though i had not offended him which
he is continually threatening to pour upon the family 

mr lovelace's threatened vengeance is in return for threatened
vengeance it is not every body will bear insult as of late i have
been forced to bear it 

o how my sister's face shone with passion 

but mr lovelace proceeded i as i have said twenty and twenty times 
would be quite out of question with me were i to be generously treated 

my sister said something with great vehemence but only raising my
voice to be heard without minding her pray madam provokingly
interrogated i was he not known to have been as wild a man when he
was at first introduced into our family as he now is said to be yet
then the common phrases of wild oats and black oxen and such-like 
were qualifiers and marriage and the wife's discretion were to
perform wonders but turning to my sister i find i have said too much 

o thou wicked reflecter and what made me abhor him think you but
the proof of those villainous freedoms that ought to have had the same
effect upon you were you but half so good a creature as you pretend to
be 

proof did you say bella i thought you had not proof but you know
best 

was not this very spiteful my dear 

now clary said she would i give a thousand pounds to know all that is
in thy little rancorous and reflecting heart at this moment 

i might let you know for a much less sum and not be afraid of being
worse treated than i have been 

well young ladies i am sorry to see passion run so high between
you you know niece to me you had not been confined thus to
your apartment could your mother by condescension or your father by
authority have been able to move you but how can you expect when
there must be a concession on one side that it should be on theirs 
if my dolly who has not the hundredth part of your understanding were
thus to set herself up in absolute contradiction to my will in a point
so material i should not take it well of her indeed i should not 

i believe not madam and if miss hervey had just such a brother and
just such a sister  you may look bella   and if both were to aggravate
her parents as my brother and sister do mine then perhaps you might
use her as i am used and if she hated the man you proposed to her and
with as much reason as i do mr solmes 

and loved a rake and libertine miss as you do lovelace said my
sister 

then might she  continued i not minding her   beg to be excused from
obeying yet if she did and would give you the most solemn assurances 
and security besides that she would never have the man you disliked 
against your consent i dare say miss hervey's father and mother would
sit down satisfied and not endeavour to force her inclinations 

so  said my sister with uplifted hands  father and mother now come in
for their share 

but if child replied my aunt i knew she loved a rake and suspected
that she sought only to gain time in order to wire-draw me into a
consent 

i beg pardon madam for interrupting you but if miss hervey could
obtain your consent what further would be said 

true child but she never should 

then madam it would never be 

that i doubt niece 

if you do madam can you think confinement and ill usage is the way to
prevent the apprehended rashness 

my dear this sort of intimation would make one but too apprehensive 
that there is no trusting to yourself when one knows your inclination 

that apprehension madam seems to have been conceived before this
intimation or the least cause for it was given why else the
disgraceful confinement i have been laid under let me venture to say 
that my sufferings seem to be rather owing to a concerted design to
intimidate me  bella held up her hands  knowing there were too good
grounds for my opposition than to a doubt of my conduct for when
they were inflicted first i had given no cause of doubt nor should
there now be room for any if my discretion might be trusted to 

my aunt after a little hesitation said but consider my dear what
confusion will be perpetuated in your family if you marry this hated
lovelace 

and let it be considered what misery to me madam if i marry that
hated solmes 

many a young creature has thought she could not love a man with whom
she has afterwards been very happy few women child marry their first
loves 

that may be the reason there are so few happy marriages 

but there are few first impressions fit to be encouraged 

i am afraid so too madam i have a very indifferent opinion of light
and first impressions but as i have often said all i wish for is to
have leave to live single 

indeed you must not miss your father and mother will be unhappy till
they see you married and out of lovelace's reach i am told that you
propose to condition with him so far are matters gone between you 
never to have any man if you have not him 

i know no better way to prevent mischief on all sides i freely own
it and there is not if he be out of the question another man in the
world i can think favourably of nevertheless i would give all i have
in the world that he were married to some other person indeed i would 
bella for all you put on that smile of incredulity 

may be so clary but i will smile for all that 

if he be out of the question repeated my aunt so miss clary i see
how it is i will go down  miss harlowe shall i follow you   and i
will endeavour to persuade your father to let my sister herself come up 
and a happier event may then result 

depend upon it madam said my sister this will be the case my mother
and she will both be in tears but with this different effect my
mother will come down softened and cut to the heart but will leave her
favourite hardened from the advantages she will think she has over my
mother's tenderness why madam it is for this very reason the girl is
not admitted into her presence 

thus she ran on as she went downstairs 


letters of volume ii


letter i clarissa to miss howe another visit from her aunt and
sister the latter spitefully insults her with the patterns a tender
scene between her aunt and her in arabella's absence she endeavours to
account for the inflexibility of her parents and uncles 

letter ii miss howe to clarissa humourous description of mr hickman 
imagines from what lovelace hickman and solmes are now what figures
they made when boys at school 

letter iii from the same useful observations on general life severe
censures of the harlowe family for their pride formality and other
bad qualities 

letter iv from the same mr hickman's conversation with two of
lovelace's libertine companions 

letter v from the same an unexpected visit from mr lovelace what
passes in it repeats her advice to her to resume her estate 

letter vi vii viii clarissa to miss howe farther particulars of the
persecutions she receives from her violent brother 

letter ix from the same impertinence of betty barnes overhears her
brother and sister encourage solmes to persevere in his address she
writes warmly to her brother upon it 

letter x from the same receives a provoking letter from her sister 
writes to her mother her mother's severe reply is impatient desires
miss howe's advice what course to pursue tries to compose her angry
passions at her harpsichord an ode to wisdom by a lady 

letter xi clarissa to miss howe chides her for misrepresenting mr 
hickman fully answers her arguments about resuming her estate her
impartiality with regard to what miss howe says of lovelace solmes and
her brother reflections on revenge and duelling 

letter xii miss howe to clarissa sir harry downeton's account of what
passed between himself and solmes she wishes her to avoid both men 
admires her for her manifold excellencies 

letter xiii clarissa to miss howe why she cannot overcome her
aversion to solmes sharp letter to lovelace on what occasion all his
difficulties she tells him owning to his faulty morals which level
all distinction insists upon his laying aside all thoughts of her her
impartial and dutiful reasonings on her difficult situation 

letter xiv miss howe to clarissa a notable debate between her and her
mother on her case those who marry for love seldom so happy as those
who marry for convenience picture of a modern marriage a lesson both
to parents and children in love-cases handsome men seldom make good
husbands miss howe reflects on the harlowe family as not famous for
strictness in religion or piety her mother's partiality for hickman 

letter xv clarissa to miss howe her increased apprehensions 
warmly defends her own mother extenuates her father's feelings and
expostulates with her on her undeserved treatment of mr hickman a
letter to her from solmes her spirited answer all in an uproar about
it her aunt hervey's angry letter to her she writes to her mother her
letter returned unopened to her father he tears her letter in pieces 
and sends it back to her she then writes a pathetic letter to her uncle
harlowe 

letter xvi from the same receives a gentler answer than she expected
from her uncle harlowe makes a new proposal in a letter to him which
she thinks must be accepted her relations assembled upon it her
opinion of the sacrifice which a child ought to make to her parents 

letter xvii from the same she tells her that the proposal she had
made to her relations on which she had built so much is rejected 
betty's saucy report upon it her brother's provoking letter to her 
her letter to her uncle harlowe on the occasion substance of a letter
excusatory from mr lovelace he presses for an interview with her in
the garden 

letter xviii clarissa to miss howe her uncle's angry answer 
substance of a humble letter from mr lovelace he has got a violent
cold and hoarseness by his fruitless attendance all night in the
coppice she is sorry he is not well makes a conditional appointment
with him for the next night in the garden hates tyranny in all shapes 

letter xix from the same a characteristic dialogue with the pert
betty barnes women have great advantage over men in all the powers that
relate to the imagination makes a request to her uncle harlowe which
is granted on condition that she will admit of a visit from solmes she
complies and appoints that day sevennight then writes to lovelace
to suspend the intended interview desires miss howe to inquire into
lovelace's behaviour at the little inn he puts up at in his way to
harlowe-place 

letter xx from the same receives a letter from lovelace written
in very high terms on her suspending the interview her angry answer 
resolves against any farther correspondence with him 

letter xxi miss howe to clarissa humourous account of her mother and
mr hickman in their little journey to visit her dying cousin rallies
her on her present displeasure with lovelace 

letter xxii mr hickman to mrs howe resenting miss howe's treatment
of him 

letter xxiii mrs howe in answer 

letter xxiv miss howe to clarissa observes upon the contents of her
seven last letters advises her to send all the letters and papers she
would not have her relations see also a parcel of clothes linen etc 
is in hopes of procuring an asylum for her with her mother if things
come to extremity 

letter xxv clarissa to miss howe requisites of true satire rejoices
in the hopes she gives of her mother's protection deposits a parcel
of linen and all lovelace's letters useful observations relating to
family management and to neatness of person and dress her contrivances
to amuse betty barnes 

letter xxvi miss howe to clarissa result of her inquiry after
lovelace's behaviour at the inn doubts not but he has ruined the
innkeeper's daughter passionately inveighs against him 

letter xxvii clarissa in answer is extremely alarmed at lovelace's
supposed baseness declares her abhorrence of him 

letter xxviii miss howe to clarissa lovelace on inquiry comes out
to be not only innocent with regard to his rosebud but generous miss
howe rallies her on the effects this intelligence must have upon her
generosity 

letter xxix clarissa in reply acknowledges her generosity engaged
in his favour frankly expresses tenderness and regard for him and owns
that the intelligence of his supposed baseness had affected her more
than she thinks it ought contents of a letter she has received from
him pities him writes to him that her rejection of solmes is not in
favour to himself for that she is determined to hold herself free
to obey her parents as she had offered to them of their giving up
solmes reproaches him for his libertine declarations in all companies
against matrimony her notions of filial duty notwithstanding the
persecutions she meets with 

letter xxx miss howe to clarissa her treatment of mr hickman on his
intrusion into her company applauds clarissa for the generosity of her
spirit and the greatness of her mind 

letter xxxi clarissa to miss howe dr lewen makes her a formal visit 
affected civility of her brother and sister to her is visited by her
uncle harlowe and by her sister she penetrates the low art designed in
this change of their outward behaviour substance of lovelace's reply
to her last he acknowledges his folly for having ever spoken lightly of
matrimony 

letter xxxii from the same another letter from mr lovelace in
which he expresses himself extremely apprehensive of the issue of
her interview with solmes presses her to escape proposes means for
effecting it and threatens to rescue her by violence if they attempt
to carry her to her uncle antony's against her will her terror on the
occasion she insists in her answer on his forbearing to take any rash
step and expresses herself highly dissatisfied that he should think
himself entitled to dispute her father's authority in removing her to
her uncle's she relies on mrs howe's protection till her cousin morden
arrives 

letter xxxiii clarissa to miss howe a visit from her aunt hervey 
preparative to the approaching interview with solmes her aunt tells her
what is expected on her having consented to that interview 

letter xxxiv xxxv from the same a particular account of what passed
in the interview with solmes and of the parts occasionally taken in
it by her boisterous uncle by her brutal brother by her implacable
sister and by her qualifying aunt her perseverance and distress her
cousin dolly's tenderness for her her closet searched for papers all
the pens and ink they find taken from her 

letter xxxvi from the same substance of a letter from lovelace his
proposals promises and declarations all her present wish is to be
able to escape solmes on one hand and to avoid incurring the disgrace
of refuging with the family of a man at enmity with her own on the
other her emotions behind the yew-hedge on seeing her father going into
the garden grieved at what she hears him say dutiful message to
her mother harshly answered she censures mr lovelace for his rash
threatenings to rescue her justifies her friends for resenting them 
and condemns herself for corresponding with him at first 

letter xxxvii miss howe to clarissa is vexed at the heart to be
obliged to tell her that her mother refuses to receive and protect her 
offers to go away privately with her 

letter xxxviii clarissa to miss howe her disinterested arguments in
mrs howe's favour on her refusal to receive her all her consolation
is that her unhappy situation is not owing to her own inadvertence of
folly is afraid she is singled out either for her own faults or for
those of her family or perhaps for the faults of both to be a very
unhappy creature justifies the ways of providence let what will befal
her and argues with exemplary greatness of mind on this subject warmly
discourages miss howe's motion to accompany her in her flight 

letter xxxix clarissa to miss howe further instances of her
impartiality in condemning lovelace and reasoning for her parents 
overhears her brother and sister exulting in the success of their
schemes and undertaking the one to keep his father up to his
resentment on occasion of lovelace's menaces the other her mother 
exasperated at this and at what her aunt hervey tells her she writes
to lovelace that she will meet him the following monday and throw
herself into the protection of the ladies of his family 

letter xl from the same her frightful dream now that lovelace has
got her letter she repents her appointment 

letter xli from the same receives a letter from mr lovelace full
of transport vows and promises he presumes upon her being his on her
getting away though she has not given him room for such hopes in her
answer she tells him that she looks not upon herself as absolutely
bound by her appointment that there are many points to be adjusted
between them were she to leave her father's house before she can give
him particular encouragement that he must expect she will do her utmost
to procure a reconciliation with her father and his approbation of
her future steps  all her friends are to be assembled on the following
wednesday she is to be brought before them how to be proceeded with 
lovelace in his reply asks pardon for writing to her with so much
assurance and declares his entire acquiescence with her will and
pleasure 

letter xlii from the same confirms her appointment but tells him
what he is not to expect promises that if she should change her mind
as to withdrawing she will take the first opportunity to see him and
acquaint him with her reasons reflections on what she has done her
deep regret to be thus driven 

letter xliii miss howe to clarissa reasons why she ought to allow her
to accompany her in her flight punctilio at an end the moment she is
out of her father's house requisites of friendship questions whether
she will not rather choose to go off with one of her own sex than
with lovelace and if not whether she should not marry him as soon as
possible 

letter xliv clarissa to miss howe miss howe's last not received 
lovelace promises compliance in every article with her pleasure 
her heart misgives her notwithstanding she knows not but she may yet
recede 

letter xlv from the same in answer to letter xliii reflections
worthy of herself on some of the passages in miss howe's last letter 
gives her home-put questions a full consideration and determines not to
withdraw with lovelace 

letter xlvi xlvii from the same substance of her letter to lovelace 
revoking her appointment thinks herself obliged her letter being not
taken away as well by promise as in order to prevent mischief to meet
him and to give him her reason for revoking the hour of meeting now
at hand she is apprehensive of the contest she shall have with him as
he will come with a different expectation 

letter xlviii from the same dated from st alban's writes in the
utmost anguish of mind for the little parcel of linen she had sent to
her with better hopes condemns her own rashness in meeting lovelace 
begs her pity and her prayers 




the history of clarissa harlowe




letter i

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


my heart fluttered with the hope and the fear of seeing my mother and
with the shame and grief of having given her so much uneasiness but it
needed not she was not permitted to come but my aunt was so good as to
return yet not without my sister and taking my hand made me sit down
by her 

she came she must own officiously she said this once more 
though against the opinion of my father but knowing and dreading the
consequence of my opposition she could not but come 

she then set forth to my friends' expectation from me mr solmes's
riches three times as rich he came out to be as any body had thought
him the settlements proposed mr lovelace's bad character their
aversions to him all in a very strong light not in a stronger than
my mother had before placed them in my mother surely could not have
given the particulars of what had passed between herself and me if she
had my aunt would not have repeated many of the same sentiments as
you will find she did that had been still more strongly urged without
effect by her venerable sister 

she said it would break the heart of my father to have it imagined that
he had not a power over his own child and that as he thought for
my own good a child too whom they had always doated upon dearest 
dearest miss concluded she clasping her fingers with the most
condescending earnestness let me beg of you for my sake for your own
sake for a hundred sakes to get over this averseness to give up your
prejudices and make every one happy and easy once more i would kneel
to you my dearest niece nay i will kneel to you 

and down she dropt and i with her kneeling to her and beseeching her
not to kneel clasping my arms about her and bathing her worthy bosom
with my tears 

o rise rise my beloved aunt said i you cut me to the heart with this
condescending goodness 

say then my dearest niece say then that you will oblige all your
friends if you love us i beseech you do 

how can i perform what i can sooner choose to die than to perform 

say then my dear that you will consider of it say you will but
reason with yourself give us but hopes don't let me entreat and thus
entreat in vain  for still she kneeled and i by her  

what a hard case is mine could i but doubt i know i could
conquer that which is an inducement to my friends is none at all to
me how often my dearest aunt must i repeat the same thing let me
but be single cannot i live single let me be sent as i have proposed 
to scotland to florence any where let me be sent a slave to the
indies any where any of these i will consent to but i cannot cannot
think of giving my vows to man i cannot endure 

well then rising bella silently with uplifted hands reproaching my
supposed perverseness i see nothing can prevail with you to oblige us 

what can i do my dearest aunt hervey what can i do were i capable of
giving a hope i meant not to enlarge then could i say i would consider
of your kind advice but i would rather be thought perverse than
insincere is there however no medium can nothing be thought of will
nothing do but to have a man who is the more disgustful to me because
he is unjust in the very articles he offers 

whom now clary said my sister do you reflect upon consider that 

make not invidious applications of what i say bella it may not be
looked upon in the same light by every one the giver and the accepter
are principally answerable in an unjust donation while i think of it in
this light i should be inexcusable to be the latter but why do i enter
upon a supposition of this nature my heart as i have often often
said recoils at the thought of the man in every light whose father 
but mine agrees upon articles where there is no prospect of a liking 
where the direct contrary is avowed all along avowed without the
least variation or shadow of a change of sentiment but it is not my
father's doing originally o my cruel cruel brother to cause a measure
to be forced upon me which he would not behave tolerably under were
the like to be offered to him 

the girl is got into her altitudes aunt hervey said my sister you
see madam she spares nobody be pleased to let her know what she has
to trust to nothing is to be done with her pray madam pronounce her
doom 

my aunt retired to the window weeping with my sister in her hand 
i cannot indeed i cannot miss harlowe said she softly but yet i
heard every word she said there is great hardship in her case she
is a noble child after all what pity things are gone so far but mr 
solmes ought to be told to desist 

o madam said my sister in a kind of loud whisper are you caught too
by the little siren my mother did well not to come up i question
whether my father himself after his first indignation would not be
turned round by her nobody but my brother can do any thing with her i
am sure 

don't think of your brother's coming up said my aunt still in a low
voice he is too furious i see no obstinacy no perverseness in
her manner if your brother comes i will not be answerable for the
consequences for i thought twice or thrice she would have gone into
fits 

o madam she has a strong heart and you see there is no prevailing
with her though you were upon your knees to her 

my sister left my aunt musing at the window with her back towards us 
and took that opportunity to insult me still more barbarously for 
stepping to my closet she took up the patterns which my mother had sent
me up and bringing them to me she spread them upon the chair by me 
and offering one and then another upon her sleeve and shoulder thus
she ran on with great seeming tranquility but whisperingly that my
aunt might not hear her this clary is a pretty pattern enough but
this is quite charming i would advise you to make your appearance in
it and this were i you should be my wedding night-gown and this
my second dressed suit won't you give orders love to have your
grandmother's jewels new set or will you thing to shew away in the new
ones mr solmes intends to present to you he talks of laying out two
or three thousand pounds in presents child dear heart how gorgeously
will you be array'd what silent still but clary won't you have a
velvet suit it would cut a great figure in a country church you know 
and the weather may bear it for a month yet to come crimson velvet 
suppose such a fine complexion as yours how it would be set off by it 
what an agreeable blush would it give you heigh-ho mocking me for i
sighed to be thus fooled with and do you sigh love well then as it
will be a solemn wedding what think you of black velvet child silent
still clary black velvet so fair as you are with those charming
eyes gleaming through a wintry cloud like an april sun does not
lovelace tell you they are charming eyes how lovely will you appear to
every one what silent still love but about your laces clary 

she would have gone on still further had not my aunt advance towards
me wiping her eyes what whispering ladies you seem so easy and so
pleased miss harlowe with your private conference that i hope i shall
carry down good news 

i am only giving her my opinion of her patterns here unasked indeed 
but she seems by her silence to approve of my judgment 

o bella said i that mr lovelace had not taken you at your word you
had before now been exercising your judgment on your own account and i
had been happy as well as you was it my fault i pray you that it was
not so 

o how she raved 

to be so ready to give bella and so loth to take is not very fair in
you 

the poor bella descended to call names 

why sister said i you are as angry as if there were more in the
hint than possibly might be designed my wish is sincere for both our
sakes for the whole family's sake and what good now is there in
it do not do not dear bella give me cause to suspect that i have
found a reason for your behaviour to me and which till now was wholly
unaccountable from sister to sister 

fie fie clary said my aunt 

my sister was more and more outrageous 

o how much fitter said i to be a jest than a jester but now bella 
turn the glass to you and see how poorly sits the robe upon your own
shoulders which you have been so unmercifully fixing upon mine 

fie fie miss clary repeated my aunt 

and fie fie likewise good madam to miss harlowe you would say were
you to have heard her barbarous insults 

let us go madam said my sister with great violence let us leave the
creature to swell till she bursts with her own poison the last time i
will ever come near her in the mind i am in 

it is so easy a thing returned i were i to be mean enough to follow
an example that is so censurable in the setter of it to vanquish such
a teasing spirit as your's with its own blunt weapons that i am amazed
you will provoke me yet bella since you will go for she had
hurried to the door forgive me i forgive you and you have a double
reason to do so both from eldership and from the offence so studiously
given to one in affliction but may you be happy though i never shall 
may you never have half the trials i have had be this your comfort 
that you cannot have a sister to treat you as you have treated me and
so god bless you 

o thou art a and down she flung without saying what 

permit me madam said i to my aunt sinking down and clasping her
knees with my arms to detain you one moment not to say any thing about
my poor sister she is her own punisher only to thank you for all
your condescending goodness to me i only beg of you not to impute to
obstinacy the immovableness i have shown to so tender a friend and to
forgive me every thing i have said or done amiss in your presence for
it has not proceeded from inward rancour to the poor bella but i will
be bold to say that neither she nor my brother nor even my father
himself knows what a heart they have set a bleeding 

i saw to my comfort what effect my sister's absence wrought for
me rise my noble-minded niece charming creature  those were her
kind words  kneel not to me keep to yourself what i now say to you i
admire you more than i can express and if you can forbear claiming your
estate and can resolve to avoid lovelace you will continue to be the
greatest miracle i ever knew at your years but i must hasten down after
your sister these are my last words to you conform to your father's
will if you possibly can how meritorious will it be in you if you do
so pray to god to enable you to conform you don't know what may be
done 

only my dear aunt one word one word more for she was going speak
all you can for my dear mrs norton she is but low in the world should
ill health overtake her she may not know how to live without my mamma's
favour i shall have no means to help her for i will want necessaries
before i will assert my right and i do assure you she has said so many
things to me in behalf of my submitting to my father's will that her
arguments have not a little contributed to make me resolve to avoid the
extremities which nevertheless i pray to god they do not at last force
me upon and yet they deprive me of her advice and think unjustly of
one of the most excellent of women 

i am glad to hear you say this and take this and this and this my
charming niece for so she called me almost at every word kissing me
earnestly and clasping her arms about my neck and god protect you 
and direct you but you must submit indeed you must some one day in a
month from this is all the choice that is left you 

and this i suppose was the doom my sister called for and yet no worse
than what had been pronounced upon me before 

she repeated these last sentences louder than the former and remember 
miss  added she it is your duty to comply  and down she went 
leaving me with my heart full and my eyes running over 

the very repetition of this fills me with almost equal concern to that
which i felt at the time 

i must lay down my pen mistiness which give to the deluged eye the
appearance of all the colours in the rainbow will not permit me to
write on 


wednesday five o'clock


i will now add a few lines my aunt as she went down from me was met
at the foot of the stairs by my sister who seemed to think she had
staid a good while after her and hearing her last words prescribing
to me implicit duty praised her for it and exclaimed against my
obstinacy did you ever hear of such perverseness madam said she 
could you have thought that your clarissa and every body's clarissa was
such a girl and who as you said is to submit her father or she 

my aunt said something in answer to her compassionating me as i
thought by her accent but i heard not the words 

such a strange perseverance in a measure so unreasonable but my
brother and sister are continually misrepresenting all i say and do and
i am deprived of the opportunity of defending myself my sister says 
that had they thought me such a championess they you not have engaged
with me and now not knowing how to reconcile my supposed obstinacy
with my general character and natural temper they seem to hope to tire
me out and resolve to vary their measures accordingly my brother you
see is determined to carry this point or to abandon harlowe-place 
and never to see it more so they are to lose a son or to conquer
a daughter the perversest and most ungrateful that ever parents
had this is the light he places things in and has undertaken it
seems to subdue me if his advice should be followed it will be
farther tried of that i am convinced and what will be their next
measure who can divine 


 see letter xlii of vol i 

 ibid 


i shall dispatch with this my answer to your's of sunday last begun
on monday but which is not yet quite finished it is too long to copy 
i have not time for it in it i have been very free with you my dear 
in more places than one i cannot say that i am pleased with all i have
written yet will not now alter it my mind is not at ease enough for
the subject don't be angry with me yet if you can excuse one or two
passages it will be because they were written by

your clarissa harlowe 


 see letter xl ibid 




letter ii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe wednesday night march 22 


angry what should i be angry for i am mightily pleased with your
freedom as you call it i only wonder at your patience with me that's
all i am sorry i gave you the trouble of so long a letter upon the
occasion notwithstanding the pleasure i received in reading it 


 see vol i letter xxxvii for the occasion and letters
 xxxviii and xl of the same volume for the freedom
 clarissa apologizes for 


i believe you did not intend reserves to me for two reasons i believe
you did not first because you say you did not next because you have
not as yet been able to convince yourself how it is to be with you and
persecuted as you are how so to separate the effects that spring from
the two causes  persecution and love  as to give to each its particular
due but this i believe i hinted to you once before and so will say no
more upon this subject at present 

robin says you had but just deposited your last parcel when he took it 
for he was there but half an hour before and found nothing he had seen
my impatience and loitered about being willing to bring me something
from you if possible 

my cousin jenny fynnett is here and desires to be my bedfellow
to-night so i shall not have an opportunity to sit down with that
seriousness and attention which the subjects of yours require for she
is all prate you know and loves to set me a prating yet comes upon
a very grave occasion to procure my mother to go with her to her
grandmother larking who has long been bed-ridden and at last has taken
it into her head that she is mortal and therefore will make her will a
work she was till now extremely averse to but it must be upon condition
that my mother who is her distant relation will go to her and advise
her as to the particulars of it for she has a high opinion as every
one else has of my mother's judgment in all matters relating to wills 
settlements and such-like notable affairs 

mrs larking lives about seventeen miles off and as my mother cannot
endure to lie out of her own house she proposes to set out early in
the morning that she might be able to get back again at night so 
to-morrow i shall be at your devotion from day-light to day-light nor
will i be at home to any body 

i have hinted before that i could almost wish my mother and mr hickman
would make a match of it and i here repeat my wishes what signifies
a difference of fifteen or twenty years especially when the lady has
spirits that will make her young a long time and the lover is a mighty
sober man i think verily i could like him better for a papa than
for a nearer relation and they are strange admirers of one another 

but allow me a perhaps still better and as to years more suitable and
happier disposal for the man at least what think you my dear of
compromising with your friends by rejecting both men and encouraging
my parader if your liking one of the two go no farther than
conditional i believe it will do a rich thought if it obtain your
approbation in this light i should have a prodigious respect for
mr hickman more by half than i can have in the other the vein is
opened shall i let it flow how difficult to withstand constitutional
foibles 

hickman is certainly a man more in your taste than any of those who have
hitherto been brought to address you he is mighty sober mighty grave 
and all that then you have told me that he is your favourite but that
is because he is my mother's perhaps the man would certainly rejoice at
the transfer or he must be a greater fool than i take him to be 

o but your fierce lover would knock him o' the head i forgot
that what makes me incapable of seriousness when i write about
hickman yet the man so good a sort of man in the main but who is
perfect this is one of my foibles and it is something for you to chide
me for 

you believe me to be very happy in my prospect in relation to him 
because you are so very unhappy in the foolish usage you meet with you
are apt as i suspect to think that tolerable which otherwise would be
far from being so i dare say you would not with all your grave airs 
like him for yourself except being addressed by solmes and him you
were obliged to have one of them i have given you a test let me see
what you will say to it 

for my own part i confess to you that i have great exceptions to
hickman he and wedlock never yet once entered into my head at one time 
shall i give you my free thoughts of him of his best and his worst 
and that as if i were writing to one who knows him not i think i will 
yet it is impossible i should do it gravely the subject won't bear to
be so treated in my opinion we are not come so far as that yet if ever
we shall and to do it in another strain ill becomes my present real
concern for you 


 


here i was interrupted on the honest man's account he has been here
these two hours courting the mother for the daughter i suppose yet
she wants no courting neither tis well one of us does else the man
would have nothing but halcyon and be remiss and saucy of course 

he was going his horses at the door my mother sent for me down 
pretending to want to say something to me 

something she said when i came that signified nothing evidently for no
reason called me but to give me an opportunity to see what a fine bow
her man could make and that she might wish me a good night she knows
i am not over ready to oblige him with my company if i happen to be
otherwise engaged i could not help an air a little upon the fretful 
when i found she had nothing of moment to say to me and when i saw her
intention 

she smiled off the visible fretfulness that the man might go away in
good humour with himself 

he bowed to the ground and would have taken my hand his whip in the
other i did not like to be so companioned i withdrew my hand but
touched his elbow with a motion as if from his low bow i had supposed
him falling and would have helped him up a sad slip it might have
been said i 

a mad girl smiled it off my mother 

he was quite put out took his horse-bridle stumped back back back 
bowing till he run against his servant i laughed he mounted his
horse i mounted up stairs after a little lecture and my head is so
filled with him that i must resume my intention in hopes to divert you
for a few moments 

take it then his best and his worst as i said before 

hickman is a sort of fiddling busy yet to borrow a word from you 
unbusy man has a great deal to do and seems to me to dispatch nothing 
irresolute and changeable in every thing but in teasing me with his
nonsense which yet it is evident he must continue upon my mother's
interest more than upon his own hopes for none have i given him 

then i have a quarrel against his face though in his person for
a well-thriven man tolerably genteel not to his features so much
neither for what as you have often observed are features in a
man but hickman with strong lines and big cheek and chin bones 
has not the manliness in his aspect which lovelace has with the most
regular and agreeable features 

then what a set and formal mortal he is in some things i have not been
able yet to laugh him out of his long bid and beads indeed that is 
because my mother thinks they become him and i would not be so free
with him as to own i should choose to have him leave it off if he did 
so particular is the man he would certainly if left to himself fall
into a king-william's cravat or some such antique chin-cushion as by
the pictures of that prince one sees was then the fashion 

as to his dress in general he cannot indeed be called a sloven but
sometimes he is too gaudy at other times too plain to be uniformly
elegant and for his manners he makes such a bustle with them and
about them as would induce one to suspect that they are more strangers
than familiars to him you i know lay this to his fearfulness of
disobliging or offending indeed your over-doers generally give the
offence they endeavour to avoid 

the man however is honest is of family has a clear and good estate 
and may one day be a baronet an't please you he is humane and
benevolent tolerably generous as people say and as i might say too 
if i would accept of his bribes which he offers in hopes of having them
all back again and the bribed into the bargain a method taken by all
corrupters from old satan to the lowest of his servants yet to speak
in the language of a person i am bound to honour he is deemed a prudent
man that is to say a good manager 

then i cannot but confess that now i like not anybody better whatever
i did once 

he is no fox-hunter he keeps a pack indeed but prefers not his hounds
to his fellow-creatures no bad sign for a wife i own he loves his
horse but dislikes racing in a gaming way as well as all sorts of
gaming then he is sober modest they say virtuous in short 
has qualities that mothers would be fond of in a husband for their
daughters and for which perhaps their daughters would be the happier
could they judge as well for themselves as experience possibly may
teach them to judge for their future daughters 

nevertheless to own the truth i cannot say i love the man nor i
believe ever shall 

strange that these sober fellows cannot have a decent sprightliness 
a modest assurance with them something debonnaire which need not be
separated from that awe and reverence when they address a woman which
should shew the ardour of their passion rather than the sheepishness
of their nature for who knows not that love delights in taming the
lion-hearted that those of the sex who are most conscious of their
own defect in point of courage naturally require and therefore as
naturally prefer the man who has most of it as the most able to give
them the requisite protection that the greater their own cowardice as
it would be called in a man the greater is their delight in subjects
of heroism as may be observed in their reading which turns upon
difficulties encountered battles fought and enemies overcome four or
five hundred by the prowess of one single hero the more improbable the
better in short that their man should be a hero to every one living
but themselves and to them know no bound to his humility a woman has
some glory in subduing a heart no man living can appall and hence too
often the bravo assuming the hero and making himself pass for one 
succeeds as only a hero should 

but as for honest hickman the good man is so generally meek as i
imagine that i know not whether i have any preference paid me in his
obsequiousness and then when i rate him he seems to be so naturally
fitted for rebuke and so much expects it that i know not how to
disappoint him whether he just then deserve it or not i am sure he
has puzzled me many a time when i have seen him look penitent for faults
he has not committed whether to pity or laugh at him 

you and i have often retrospected the faces and minds of grown people 
that is to say have formed images for their present appearances 
outside and in as far as the manners of the persons would justify us
in the latter what sort of figures they made when boys and girls and
i'll tell you the lights in which hickman solmes and lovelace our
three heroes have appeared to me supposing them boys at school 

solmes i have imagined to be a little sordid pilfering rogue who would
purloin from every body and beg every body's bread and butter from him 
while as i have heard a reptile brag he would in a winter-morning spit
upon his thumbs and spread his own with it that he might keep it all
to himself 

hickman a great overgrown lank-haired chubby boy who would be
hunched and punched by every body and go home with his finger in his
eye and tell his mother 

while lovelace i have supposed a curl-pated villain full of fire 
fancy and mischief an orchard-robber a wall-climber a horse-rider
without saddle or bridle neck or nothing a sturdy rogue in short 
who would kick and cuff and do no right and take no wrong of any
body would get his head broke then a plaster for it or let it heal
of itself while he went on to do more mischief and if not to get 
to deserve broken bones and the same dispositions have grown up with
them and distinguish them as me with no very material alteration 

only that all men are monkeys more or less or else that you and i
should have such baboons as these to choose out of is a mortifying
thing my dear 

i am sensible that i am a little out of season in treating thus
ludicrously the subject i am upon while you are so unhappy and if
my manner does not divert you as my flightiness used to do i am
inexcusable both to you and to my own heart which i do assure you 
notwithstanding my seeming levity is wholly in your case 

as this letter is extremely whimsical i will not send it until i can
accompany it with something more solid and better suited to your
unhappy circumstances that is to say to the present subject of our
correspondence to-morrow as i told you will be wholly my own and of
consequence yours adieu therefore till then 




letter iii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe tuesday morn 7 o'clock


my mother and cousin are already gone off in our chariot and four 
attended by their doughty squire on horseback and he by two of his
own servants and one of my mother's they both love parade when they
go abroad at least in compliment to one another which shews that
each thinks the other does robin is your servant and mine and nobody's
else and the day is all my own 

i must begin with blaming you my dear for your resolution not to
litigate for your right if occasion were to be given you justice is
due to ourselves as well as to every body else still more must i blame
you for declaring to your aunt and sister that you will not since as
they will tell it to your father and brother the declaration must needs
give advantage to spirits who have so little of that generosity for
which you are so much distinguished 

there never was a spirit in the world that would insult where it dared 
but it would creep and cringe where it dared not let me remind you of
a sentence of your own the occasion for which i have forgotten that
little spirits will always accommodate themselves to the temper of those
they would work upon will fawn upon a sturdy-tempered person will
insult the meek  and another given to miss biddulph upon an occasion
you cannot forget if we assume a dignity in what we say and do and
take care not to disgrace by arrogance our own assumption every body
will treat us with respect and deference 

i remember that you once made an observation which you said you was
obliged to mrs norton for and she to her father upon an excellent
preacher who was but an indifferent liver that to excel in theory 
and to excel in practice generally required different talents which
did not always meet in the same person  do you my dear to whom theory
and practice are the same thing in almost every laudable quality apply
the observation to yourself in this particular case where resolution
is required and where the performance of the will of the defunct is the
question no more to be dispensed with by you in whose favour it was
made than by any body else who have only themselves in view by breaking
through it 

i know how much you despise riches in the main but yet it behoves
you to remember that in one instance you yourself have judged them
valuable in that they put it into our power to lay obligations while
the want of that power puts a person under a necessity of receiving
favours receiving them perhaps from grudging and narrow spirits who
know not how to confer them with that grace which gives the principal
merit to a beneficent action  reflect upon this my dear and see how
it agrees with the declaration you have made to your aunt and sister 
that you would not resume your estate were you to be turned out of
doors and reduced to indigence and want their very fears that you will
resume point out to you the necessity of resuming upon the treatment
you meet with 

i own that at first reading i was much affected with your mother's
letter sent with the patterns a strange measure however from a mother 
for she did not intend to insult you and i cannot but lament that so
sensible and so fine a woman should stoop to so much art as that letter
is written with and which also appears in some of the conversations
you have given me an account of see you not in her passiveness what
boisterous spirits can obtain from gentler merely by teasing and
ill-nature 

i know the pride they have always taken in calling you a
harlowe clarissa harlowe so formal and so set at every word 
when they are grave or proudly solemn your mother has learnt it of
them and as in marriage so in will has been taught to bury her own
superior name and family in theirs i have often thought that the same
spirit governed them in this piece of affectation and others of
the like nature as harlowe-place and so-forth though not the elder
brother's or paternal seat as governed the tyrant tudor who marrying
elizabeth the heiress of the house of york made himself a title to
a throne which he would not otherwise have had being but a base
descendant of the lancaster line and proved a gloomy and vile
husband to her for no other cause than because she had laid him under
obligations which his pride would not permit him to own nor would the
unprincely wretch marry her till he was in possession of the crown that
he might not be supposed to owe it to her claim 


 henry vii 


you have chidden me and again will i doubt not for the liberties i
take with some of your relations but my dear need i tell you that
pride in ourselves must and for ever will provoke contempt and bring
down upon us abasement from others have we not in the case of a
celebrated bard observed that those who aim at more than their due 
will be refused the honours they may justly claim i am very much loth
to offend you yet i cannot help speaking of your relations as well as
of others as i think they deserve praise or dispraise is the reward
or punishment which the world confers or inflicts on merit or
demerit and for my part i neither can nor will confound them in the
application i despise them all but your mother indeed i do and as
for her but i will spare the good lady for your sake and one
argument indeed i think may be pleaded in her favour in the present
contention she who has for so many years and with such absolute
resignation borne what she has borne to the sacrifice of her own will 
may think it an easier task than another person can imagine it for her
daughter to give up hers but to think to whose instigation all this is
originally owing god forgive me but with such usage i should have been
with lovelace before now yet remember my dear that the step which
would not be wondered at from such a hasty-tempered creatures as me 
would be inexcusable in such a considerate person as you 

after your mother has been thus drawn in against her judgment i am the
less surprised that your aunt hervey should go along with her since
the two sisters never separate i have inquired into the nature of the
obligation which mr hervey's indifferent conduct in his affairs has
laid him under it is only it seems that your brother has paid off
for him a mortgage upon one part of his estate which the mortgagee was
about to foreclose and taken it upon himself a small favour as he has
ample security in his hands from kindred to kindred but such a one it
is plain as has laid the whole family of the herveys under obligation
to the ungenerous lender who has treated him and his aunt too as
miss dolly hervey has privately complained with the less ceremony ever
since 

must i my dear call such a creature your brother i believe i
must because he is your father's son there is no harm i hope in
saying that 

i am concerned that you ever wrote at all to him it was taking too
much notice of him it was adding to his self-significance and a call
upon him to treat you with insolence a call which you might have been
assured he would not fail to answer 

but such a pretty master as this to run riot against such a man as
lovelace who had taught him to put his sword into his scabbard when
he had pulled it out by accident these in-door insolents who turning
themselves into bugbears frighten women children and servants are
generally cravens among men were he to come fairly across me and say
to my face some of the free things which i am told he has said of me
behind my back or that as by your account he has said of our sex i
would take upon myself to ask him two or three questions although he
were to send me a challenge likewise 

i repeat you know that i will speak my mind and write it too he is
not my brother can you say he is yours so for your life if you
are just you can't be angry with me for would you side with a false
brother against a true friend a brother may not be a friend but a
friend will always be a brother mind that as your uncle tony says 

i cannot descend so low as to take very particular notice of the
epistles of these poor souls whom you call uncles yet i love to divert
myself with such grotesque characters too but i know them and love you 
and so cannot make the jest of them which their absurdities call for 

you chide me my dear for my freedoms with relations still nearer and
dearer to you than either uncles or brother or sister you had better
have permitted me uncorrected to have taken my own way do not use
those freedoms naturally arise from the subject before us and from whom
arises that subject i pray you can you for one quarter of an hour
put yourself in my place or in the place of those who are still more
indifferent to the case than i can be if you can but although i have
you not often at advantage i will not push you 


 see vol i letter xxviii 


permit me however to subjoin that well may your father love your
mother as you say he does a wife who has no will but his but were
there not think you some struggles between them at first gout out of
the question your mother when a maiden had as i have heard and it
is very likely a good share of those lively spirits which she liked
in your father she has none of them now how came they to be
dissipated ah my dear she has been too long resident in
trophonius's cave i doubt 


 spectator vol viii no 599 


let me add one reflection upon this subject and so entitle myself to
your correction for all at once it is upon the conduct of those wives
 for you and i know more than one such who can suffer themselves to
be out-blustered and out-gloomed of their own wills instead of being
fooled out of them by acts of tenderness and complaisance i wish 
that it does not demonstrate too evidently that with some of the
sex insolent controul is a more efficacious subduer than kindness or
concession upon my life my dear i have often thought that many of us
are mere babies in matrimony perverse fools when too much indulged and
humoured creeping slaves when treated harshly but shall it be said 
that fear makes us more gentle obligers than love forbid it honour 
forbid it gratitude forbid it justice that any woman of sense should
give occasion to have this said of her 

did i think you would have any manner of doubt from the style or
contents of this letter whose saucy pen it is that has run on at this
rate i would write my name at length since it comes too much from my
heart to disavow it but at present the initials shall serve and i will
go on again directly 

a h 




letter iv

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe thursday morn 10 o'clock mar 23 


i will postpone or perhaps pass by several observations which i had to
make on other parts of your letters to acquaint you that mr hickman 
when in london found an opportunity to inquire after mr lovelace's
town life and conversation 

at the cocoa-tree in pall-mall he fell in with two of his intimates 
the one named belton the other mowbray both very free of speech 
and probably as free in their lives but the waiters paid them great
respect and on mr hickman's inquiry after their characters called
them men of fortune and honour 

they began to talk of mr lovelace of their own accord and upon some
gentlemen in the room asking when they expected him in town answered 
that very day mr hickman as they both went on praising lovelace 
said he had indeed heard that mr lovelace was a very fine
gentleman and was proceeding when one of them interrupting him 
said only sir the finest gentleman in the world that's all 

and so he led them on to expatiate more particularly on his qualities 
which they were very fond of doing but said not one single word in
behalf of his morals mind that also in your uncle's style 

mr hickman said that mr lovelace was very happy as he understood in
the esteem of the ladies and smiling to make them believe he did not
think amiss of it that he pushed his good fortune as far as it would
go 

well put mr hickman thought i equally grave and sage thou seemest
not to be a stranger to their dialect as i suppose this is but i said
nothing for i have often tried to find out this might sober man of my
mother's but hitherto have only to say that he is either very moral 
or very cunning 

no doubt of it replied one of them and out came an oath with a who
would not that he did as every young fellow would do 

very true said my mother's puritan but i hear he is in treaty with a
fine lady 

so he was mr belton said the devil fetch her  vile brute   for
she engrossed all his time but that the lady's family ought to
be something  mr hickman desired to be excused repeating what though
he had repeated what was worse  and might dearly repent their usage of a
man of his family and merit 

perhaps they may think him too wild cries hickman and theirs is i
hear a very sober family 

sober said one of them a good honest word dick where the devil has
it lain all this time d me if i have heard of it in this sense
ever since i was at college and then said he we bandied it about
among twenty of us as an obsolete 

these my dear are mr lovelace's companions you'll be pleased to take
notice of that 

mr hickman said this put him out of countenance 

i stared at him and with such a meaning in my eyes as he knew how to
take and so was out of countenance again 

don't you remember my dear who it was that told a young gentleman
designed for the gown who owned that he was apt to be too easily put
out of countenance when he came into free company that it was a bad
sign that it looked as if his morals were not proof but that his good
disposition seemed rather the effect of accident and education than
of such a choice as was founded upon principle  and don't you know
the lesson the very same young lady gave him to endeavour to stem and
discountenance vice and to glory in being an advocate in all companies
for virtue  particularly observing that it was natural for a man to
shun or to give up what he was ashamed of  which she should be sorry
to think his case on this occasion adding that vice was a coward and
would hide its head when opposed by such a virtue as had presence of
mind and a full persuasion of its own rectitude to support it  the
lady you may remember modestly put her doctrine into the mouth of a
worthy preacher dr lewen as she used to do when she has a mind not
to be thought what she is at so early an age and that it may give more
weight to any thing she hit upon that might appear tolerable was her
modest manner of speech 

mr hickman upon the whole professed to me upon his second recovery 
that he had no reason to think well of mr lovelace's morals from what
he heard of him in town yet his two intimates talked of his being more
regular than he used to be that he had made a very good resolution 
that of old tom wharton was the expression that he would never give
a challenge nor refuse one which they praised in him highly that in
short he was a very brave fellow and the most agreeable companion in
the world and would one day make a great figure in his country since
there was nothing he was not capable of 

i am afraid that his last assertion is too true and this my dear is
all that mr hickman could pick up about him and is it not enough to
determine such a mind as yours if not already determined 

yet it must be said too that if there be a woman in the world that can
reclaim him it is you and by your account of his behaviour in the
interview between you i own i have some hope of him at least this
i will say that all the arguments he then used with you seemed to
be just and right and if you are to be his but no more of that he
cannot after all deserve you 




letter v

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe thursday afternoon march 23 


an unexpected visitor has turned the course of my thoughts and changed
the subject i had intended to pursue the only one for whom i would have
dispensed with my resolution not to see any body all the dedicated day 
a visiter whom according to mr hickman's report from the expectations
of his libertine friends i supposed to be in town now my dear have
i saved myself the trouble of telling you that it was you too-agreeable
rake our sex is said to love to trade in surprises yet have i by
my promptitude surprised myself out of mine i had intended you must
know to run twice the length before i had suffered you to know so much
as to guess who and whether man or woman my visiter was but since you
have the discovery at so cheap a rate you are welcome to it 

the end of his coming was to engage my interest with my charming
friend and he was sure that i knew all your mind to acquaint him what
he had to trust to 

he mentioned what had passed in the interview between you but could not
be satisfied with the result of it and with the little satisfaction he
had obtained from you the malice of your family to him increasing and
their cruelty to you not abating his heart he told me was in tumults 
for fear you should be prevailed upon in favour of a man despised by
every body 

he gave me fresh instance of indignities cast upon himself by your
uncles and brother and declared that if you suffered yourself to
be forced into the arms of the man for whose sake he was loaded with
undeserved abuses you should be one of the youngest as you would be
one of the loveliest widows in england and that he would moreover call
your brother to account for the liberties he takes with his character to
every one he meets with 

he proposed several schemes for you to choose some one of them in
order to enable you to avoid the persecutions you labour under one
i will mention that you will resume your estate and if you find
difficulties that can be no otherwise surmounted that you will either
avowedly or privately as he had proposed to you accept of lady betty
lawrance's or lord m s assistance to instate you in it he declared 
that if you did he would leave absolutely to your own pleasure
afterwards and to the advice which your cousin morden on his arrival
should give you whether to encourage his address or not as you should
be convinced of the sincerity of the reformation which his enemies make
him so much want 

i had now a good opportunity to sound him as you wished mr hickman
would lord m as to the continued or diminished favour of the ladies 
and of his lordship towards you upon their being acquainted with the
animosity of your relations to them as well as to their kinsman i laid
hold of the opportunity and he satisfied me by reading some passages
of a letter he had about him from lord m that an alliance with
you and that on the foot of your own single merit would be the most
desirable event to them that could happen and so far to the purpose of
your wished inquiry does his lordship go in this letter that he assures
him that whatever you suffer in fortune from the violence of your
relations on his account he and lady sarah and lady betty will join to
make it up to him and yet that the reputation of a family so splendid 
would no doubt in a case of such importance to the honour of both 
make them prefer a general consent 

i told him as you yourself i knew had done that you were extremely
averse to mr solmes and that might you be left to your own choice 
it would be the single life as to himself i plainly said that you had
great and just objections to him on the score of his careless morals 
that it was surprising that men who gave themselves the liberties he
was said to take should presume to think that whenever they took it
into their heads to marry the most virtuous and worthy of the sex
were to fall to their lot that as to the resumption it had been very
strongly urged by myself and would be still further urged though you
had been hitherto averse to that measure that your chief reliance and
hopes were upon your cousin morden and that to suspend or gain time
till he arrived was as i believed your principal aim 

i told him that with regard to the mischief he threatened neither the
act nor the menace could serve any end but theirs who persecuted you as
it would give them a pretence for carrying into effect their compulsory
projects and that with the approbation of all the world since he must
not think the public would give its voice in favour of a violent young
man of no extraordinary character as to morals who should seek to rob
a family of eminence of a child so valuable and who threatened if he
could not obtain her in preference to a man chosen by themselves that
he would avenge himself upon them all by acts of violence 

i added that he was very much mistaken if he thought to intimidate you
by such menaces for that though your disposition was all sweetness 
yet i knew not a steadier temper in the world than yours nor one more
inflexible as your friends had found and would still further find if
they continued to give occasion for its exertion whenever you thought
yourself in the right and that you were ungenerously dealt with in
matters of too much moment to be indifferent about miss clarissa
harlowe mr lovelace let me tell you said i timid as her foresight
and prudence may make her in some cases where she apprehends dangers to
those she loves is above fear in points where her honour and the true
dignity of her sex are concerned in short sir you must not think to
frighten miss clarissa harlowe into such a mean or unworthy conduct as
only a weak or unsteady mind can be guilty of 

he was so very far from intending to intimidate you he said that he
besought me not to mention one word to you of what had passed between
us that what he had hinted at which carried the air of menace was
owing to the fervour of his spirits raised by his apprehensions of
losing all hope of you for ever and on a supposition that you were to
be actually forced into the arms of a man you hated that were this to
be the case he must own that he should pay very little regard to the
world or its censures especially as the menaces of some of your family
now and their triumph over him afterwards would both provoke and
warrant all the vengeance he could take 

he added that all the countries in the world were alike to him but on
your account so that whatever he should think fit to do were you lost
to him he should have noting to apprehend from the laws of this 

i did not like the determined air he spoke this with he is certainly
capable of great rashness 

he palliated a little this fierceness which by the way i warmly
censured by saying that while you remain single he will bear all the
indignities that shall be cast upon him by your family but would
you throw yourself if you were still farther driven into any other
protection if not lord m s or that of the ladies of his family into
my mother's suppose or would you go to london to private lodgings 
where he would never visit you unless he had your leave and from
whence you might make your own terms with your relations he would be
entirely satisfied and would as he had said before wait the effect of
your cousin's arrival and your free determination as to his own fate 
adding that he knew the family so well and how much fixed they were
upon their measures as well as the absolute dependence they had upon
your temper and principles that he could not but apprehend the worst 
while you remained in their power and under the influence of their
persuasions and menaces 


 perhaps it will be unnecessary to remind the reader that
 although mr lovelace proposes as above to miss howe that
 her fair friend should have recourse to the protection of
 mrs howe if farther driven yet he had artfully taken
 care by means of his agent in the harlowe family not only
 to inflame the family against her but to deprive her of
 mrs howe's and of every other protection being from the
 first resolved to reduce her to an absolute dependence upon
 himself see vol i letter xxxi 


we had a great deal of other discourse but as the reciting of the rest
would be but a repetition of many of the things that passed between you
and him in the interview between you in the wood-house i refer myself
to your memory on that occasion 


 see vol i letter xxxvi 


and now my dear upon the whole i think it behoves you to make
yourself independent all then will fall right this man is a violent
man i should wish methinks that you should not have either him or
solmes you will find if you get out of your brother's and sister's
way what you can or cannot do with regard to either 

if your relations persist in their foolish scheme i think i will take
his hint and at a proper opportunity sound my mother mean time let
me have your clear opinion of the resumption which i join with lovelace
in advising you can but see how your demand will work to demand is
not to litigate but be your resolution what it will do not by any
means repeat to them that you will not assert your right if they go on
to give you provocation you may have sufficient reason to change your
mind and let them expect that you will change it they have not the
generosity to treat you the better for disclaiming the power they know
you have that i think need not now be told you i am my dearest
friend and ever will be 

your most affectionate and faithful anna howe 




letter vi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wedn night march 22 


on the report made by my aunt and sister of my obstinacy my assembled
relations have taken an unanimous resolution as betty tells me it
is against me this resolution you will find signified to me in the
inclosed letter from my brother just now brought me be pleased to
return it when perused i may have occasion for it in the altercations
between my relations and me 


 


miss clary 

i am commanded to let you know that my father and uncles having heard
your aunt hervey's account of all that has passed between her and you 
having heard from your sister what sort of treatment she has had from
you having recollected all that has passed between your mother and
you having weighed all your pleas and proposals having taken into
consideration their engagements with mr solmes that gentleman's
patience and great affection for you and the little opportunity you
have given yourself to be acquainted either with his merit or his
proposals having considered two points more to wit the wounded
authority of a father and mr solmes's continued entreaties little
as you have deserved regard from him that you may be freed from a
confinement to which he is desirous to attribute your perverseness to
him  averseness i should have said but let it go  he being unable to
account otherwise for so strong a one supposing you told truth to your
mother when you asserted that your heart was free and which mr solmes
is willing to believe though nobody else does for all these reasons 
it is resolved that you shall go to your uncle antony's and you must
accordingly prepare yourself to do so you will have but short notice of
the day for obvious reasons 

i will honestly tell you the motive for your going it is a double one 
first that they may be sure that you shall not correspond with any
body they do not like for they find from mrs howe that by some means
or other you do correspond with her daughter and through her perhaps
with somebody else and next that you may receive the visits of mr 
solmes which you have thought fit to refuse to do here by which means
you have deprived yourself of the opportunity of knowing whom and what
you have hitherto refused 

if after one fortnight's conversation with mr solmes and after
you have heard what your friends shall further urge in his behalf 
unhardened by clandestine correspondencies you shall convince them 
that virgil's amor omnibus idem for the application of which i refer
you to the georgic as translated by dryden is verified in you as well
as in the rest of the animal creation and that you cannot or will
not forego your prepossession in favour of the moral the virtuous 
the pious lovelace  i would please you if i could   it will then be
considered whether to humour you or to renounce you for ever 

it is hoped that as you must go you will go cheerfully your uncle
antony will make ever thing at his house agreeable to you but indeed he
won't promise that he will not at proper times draw up the bridge 

your visiters besides mr solmes will be myself if you permit me that
honour miss clary your sister and as you behave to mr solmes your
aunt hervey and your uncle harlowe and yet the two latter will
hardly come neither if they think it will be to hear your whining
vocatives betty barnes will be your attendant and i must needs tell
you miss that we none of us think the worse of the faithful maid for
your dislike of her although betty who would be glad to oblige you 
laments it as a misfortune 

your answer is required whether you cheerfully consent to go and your
indulgent mother bids me remind you from her that a fortnight's visit
from mr solmes are all that is meant at present 

i am as you shall be pleased to deserve yours etc james harlowe jun 


so here is the master-stroke of my brother's policy called upon to
consent to go to my uncle antony's avowedly to receive mr solmes's
visits a chapel a moated-house deprived of the opportunity of
corresponding with you or of any possibility of escape should
violence be used to compel me to be that odious man's 


 these violent measures and the obstinate perseverance of
 the whole family in them will be the less wondered at when
 it is considered that all the time they were but as so many
 puppets danced upon mr lovelace's wires as he boasts vol 
 i letter xxxi 


late as it was when i received this insolent letter i wrote an answer
to it directly that it might be ready for the writer's time of rising 
i inclose the rough draught of it you will see by it how much his vile
hint from the georgic and his rude one of my whining vocatives have
set me up besides as the command to get ready to go to my uncle's is
in the name of my father and uncles it is but to shew a piece of the
art they accuse me of to resent the vile hint i have so much reason to
resent in order to palliate my refusal of preparing to go to my uncle's 
which refusal would otherwise be interpreted an act of rebellion by my
brother and sister for it seems plain to me that they will work but
half their ends if they do not deprive me of my father's and uncles'
favour even although it were possible for me to comply with their own
terms 


you might have told me brother in three lines what the determination
of my friends was only that then you would not have had room to
display your pedantry by so detestable an allusion or reference to the
georgic give me leave to tell you sir that if humanity were a branch
of your studies at the university it has not found a genius in you for
mastering it nor is either my sex or myself though a sister i see
entitled to the least decency from a brother who has studied as it
seems rather to cultivate the malevolence of his natural temper 
than any tendency which one might have hoped his parentage if not his
education might have given him to a tolerable politeness 

i doubt not that you will take amiss my freedom but as you have
deserved it from me i shall be less and less concerned on that score 
as i see you are more and more intent to shew your wit at the expense of
justice and compassion 

the time is indeed come that i can no longer bear those contempts and
reflections which a brother least of all men is entitled to give and
let me beg of you one favour sir it is this that you will not give
yourself any concern about a husband for me till i shall have the
forwardness to propose a wife to you pardon me sir but i cannot
help thinking that could i have the art to get my father of my side i
should have as much right to prescribe for you as you have for me 

as to the communication you make me i must take upon me to say that
although i will receive as becomes me any of my father's commands 
yet as this signification is made by a brother who has shewn of late
so much of an unbrotherly animosity to me for no reason in the world
that i know if but that he believes he has in me one sister too much
for his interest i think myself entitled to conclude that such a
letter as you have sent me is all your own and of course to declare 
that while i so think it i will not willingly nor even without
violence go to any place avowedly to receive mr solmes's visits 

i think myself so much entitled to resent your infamous hint and this
as well for the sake of my sex as for my own that i ought to declare 
as i do that i will not receive any more of your letters unless
commanded to do so by an authority i never will dispute except in a
case where i think my future as well as present happiness concerned and
were such a case to happen i am sure my father's harshness will be less
owing to himself than to you and to the specious absurdities of your
ambitious and selfish schemes very true sir 

one word more provoked as i am i will add that had i been thought as
really obstinate and perverse as of late i am said to be i should not
have been so disgracefully treated as i have been lay your hand upon
your heart brother and say by whose instigations and examine what i
have done to deserve to be made thus unhappy and to be obliged to style
myself

your injured sister cl harlowe 


when my dear you have read my answer to my brother's letter tell me
what you think of me it shall go 




letter vii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday morning march 23 


my letter has set them all in tumults for it seems none of them went
home last night and they all were desired to be present to give
their advice if i should refuse compliance with a command thought so
reasonable as it seems this is 

betty tells me that at first my father in a rage was for coming up
to me himself and for turning me out of his doors directly nor was he
restrained till it was hinted to him that that was no doubt my wish 
and would answer all my perverse views but the result was that my
brother having really as my mother and aunt insisted taken wrong
measures with me should write again in a more moderate manner for
nobody else was permitted or cared to write to such a ready scribbler 
and i having declared that i would not receive any more of his
letters without command from a superior authority my mother was
to give it hers and accordingly has done so in the following lines 
written on the superscription of his letter to me which letter also
follows together with my reply 


clary harlowe 

receive and read this with the temper that becomes your sex your
character your education and your duty and return an answer to it 
directed to your brother 

charlotte harlowe 


to miss clarissa harlowe thursday morning 

once more i write although imperiously prohibited by a younger sister 
your mother will have me do so that you may be destitute of all
defence if you persist in your pervicacy shall i be a pedant miss 
for this word she is willing to indulge in you the least appearance of
that delicacy for which she once as well as every body else admired
you before you knew lovelace i cannot however help saying that and
she and your aunt hervey will have it  they would fain favour you 
if they could  that i may have provoked from you the answer they
nevertheless own to be so exceedingly unbecoming i am now learning you
see to take up the softer language where you have laid it down this
then is the case 

they entreat they pray they beg they supplicate will either of
these do miss clary that you will make no scruple to go to your uncle
antony's and fairly i am to tell you for the very purpose mentioned
in my last or tis presumable they need not entreat beg pray 
supplicate thus much is promised to mr solmes who is your advocate 
and very uneasy that you should be under constraint supposing that your
dislike to him arises from that and if he finds that you are not to be
moved in his favour when you are absolutely freed from what you call
a controul he will forbear thinking of you whatever it costs him 
he loves you too well and in this i really think his understanding 
which you have reflected upon is to be questioned 

only for one fornight  sic  therefore permit his visits your
education you tell me of mine you know ought to make you incapable
of rudeness to any body he will not i hope be the first man myself
excepted whom you ever treated rudely purely because he is esteemed
by us all i am what you have a mind to make me friend brother 
or servant i wish i could be still more polite to so polite to so
delicate a sister 

ja harlowe 

you must still write to me if you condescend to reply your mother
will not be permitted to be disturbed with your nothing-meaning
vocatives vocatives once more madam clary repeats the pedant your
brother 


 


to james harlowe junior esq 

permit me my ever-dear and honoured papa and mamma in this manner to
surprise you into an audience presuming this will be read to you 
since i am denied the honour of writing to you directly let me beg of
you to believe that nothing but the most unconquerable dislike
could make me stand against your pleasure what are riches what are
settlements to happiness let me not thus cruelly be given up to a man
my very soul is averse to permit me to repeat that i cannot honestly
be his had i a slighter notion of the matrimonial duty than i have 
perhaps i might but when i am to bear all the misery and that for
life when my heart is less concerned in this matter than my soul 
my temporary perhaps than my future good why should i be denied the
liberty of refusing that liberty is all i ask 

it were easy for me to give way to hear mr solmes talk for the
mentioned fortnight although it is impossible for me say what he
would to get over my dislike to him but the moated-house the chapel
there and the little mercy my brother and sister who are to be there 
have hitherto shewn me are what i am extremely apprehensive of and why
does my brother say my restraint is to be taken off and that too
at mr solmes's desire when i am to be a still closer prisoner than
before the bridge threatened to be drawn up and no dear papa and mamma
near me to appeal to in the last resort 

transfer not i beseech you to a brother and sister your own authority
over your child to a brother and sister who treat me with unkindness
and reproach and as i have too much reason to apprehend misrepresent
my words and behaviour or greatly favoured as i used to be it is
impossible i should be sunk so low in your opinions as i unhappily am 

let but this my hard my disgraceful confinement be put an end to 
permit me my dear mamma to pursue my needleworks in your presence 
as one of your maidens and you shall be witness that it is not either
wilfulness or prepossession that governs me let me not however be put
out of your own house let mr solmes come and go as my papa pleases 
let me but stay or retire when he comes as i can and leave the rest to
providence 

forgive me brother that thus with an appearance of art i address
myself to my father and mother to whom i am forbidden to approach 
or to write hard it is to be reduced to such a contrivance forgive
likewise the plain dealing i have used in the above with the nobleness
of a gentleman and the gentleness due from a brother to a sister 
although of late you have given me but little room to hope either for
your favour or compassion yet having not deserved to forfeit either i
presume to claim both for i am confident it is at present much in your
power although but my brother my honoured parents both i bless god 
in being to give peace to the greatly disturbed mind of

your unhappy sister cl harlowe 


betty tells me my brother has taken my letter all in pieces and has
undertaken to write such an answer to it as shall confirm the wavering 
so it is plain that i should have moved somebody by it but for this
hard-hearted brother god forgive him 




letter viii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday night march 23 


i send you the boasted confutation-letter just now put into my
hands my brother and sister my uncle antony and mr solmes are 
i understand exulting over the copy of it below as an unanswerable
performance 


to miss clarissa harlowe

once again my inflexible sister i write to you it is to let you know 
that the pretty piece of art you found out to make me the vehicle
of your whining pathetics to your father and mother has not had the
expected effect 

i do assure you that your behaviour has not been misrepresented nor
need it your mother who is solicitous to take all opportunities of
putting the most favourable constructions upon all you do has been
forced as you well know to give you up upon full trial no need then
of the expedient of pursuing your needleworks in her sight she cannot
bear your whining pranks and it is for her sake that you are not
permitted to come into her presence nor will be but upon her own
terms 

you had like to have made a simpleton of your aunt hervey yesterday 
she came down from you pleading in your favour but when she was asked 
what concession she had brought you to she looked about her and knew
not what to answer so your mother when surprised into the beginning
of your cunning address to her and to your father under my name for
i had begun to read it little suspecting such an ingenious
subterfuge and would then make me read it through wrung her hands oh 
her dear child her dear child must not be so compelled but when she
was asked whether she would be willing to have for her son-in-law the
man who bids defiance to her whole family and who had like to have
murdered her son and what concession she had gained from her dear child
to merit this tenderness and that for one who had apparently deceived
her in assuring her that her heart was free then could she look
about her as her sister had done before then was she again brought to
herself and to a resolution to assert her authority  not to transfer
it witty presumer   over the rebel who of late has so ungratefully
struggled to throw it off 

you seem child to have a high notion of the matrimonial duty and i'll
warrant like the rest of your sex one or two whom i have the honour
to know excepted that you will go to church to promise what you will
never think of afterwards but sweet child as your worthy mamma norton
calls you think a little less of the matrimonial at least till you
come into that state and a little more of the filial duty 

how can you say you are to bear all the misery when you give so large
a share of it to your parents to your uncles to your aunt to myself 
and to your sister who all for eighteen years of your life loved you
so well 

if of late i have not given you room to hope for my favour or
compassion it is because of late you have not deserved either i know
what you mean little reflecting fool by saying it is much in my
power although but your brother a very slight degree of relationship
with you to give you that peace which you can give yourself whenever
you please 

the liberty of refusing pretty miss is denied you because we are all
sensible that the liberty of choosing to every one's dislike must
follow the vile wretch you have set your heart upon speaks this plainly
to every body though you won't he says you are his and shall be his 
and he will be the death of any man who robs him of his property so 
miss we have a mind to try this point with him my father supposing he
has the right of a father in his child is absolutely determined not to
be bullied out of that right and what must that child be who prefers
the rake to a father 

this is the light in which this whole debate ought to be taken blush 
then delicacy that cannot bear the poet's amor omnibus idem blush 
then purity be ashamed virgin modesty and if capable of conviction 
surrender your whole will to the will of the honoured pair to whom you
owe your being and beg of all your friends to forgive and forget the
part you have of late acted 

i have written a longer letter than ever i designed to write to you 
after the insolent treatment and prohibition you have given me and 
now i am commissioned to tell you that your friends are as weary of
confining you as you are of being confined and therefore you must
prepare yourself to go in a very few days as you have been told before 
to your uncle antony's who notwithstanding you apprehensions will
draw up his bridge when he pleases will see what company he pleases
in his own house nor will he demolish his chapel to cure you of your
foolish late-commenced antipathy to a place of divine worship the more
foolish as if we intended to use force we could have the ceremony
pass in your chamber as well as any where else 

prejudice against mr solmes has evidently blinded you and there is a
charitable necessity to open your eyes since no one but you thinks
the gentleman so contemptible in his person nor for a plain country
gentleman who has too much solid sense to appear like a coxcomb justly
blamable in his manners and as to his temper it is necessary you
should speak upon fuller knowledge than at present it is plain you can
have of him 

upon the whole it will not be amiss that you prepare for your speedy
removal as well for the sake of your own conveniency as to shew your
readiness in one point at least to oblige your friends one of whom
you may if you please to deserve it reckon though but a brother 

james harlowe 

p s if you are disposed to see mr solmes and to make some excuses
to him for past conduct in order to be able to meet him somewhere else
with the less concern to yourself for your freedoms with him he shall
attend you where you please 

if you have a mind to read the settlements before they are read to you
for your signing they shall be sent you up who knows but they will
help you to some fresh objections your heart is free you know it
must for did you not tell your mother it was and will the pious
clarissa fib to her mamma 

i desire no reply the case requires none yet i will ask you have you 
miss no more proposals to make 


 


i was so vexed when i came to the end of this letter the postscript to
which perhaps might be written after the others had seen the letter 
that i took up my pen with an intent to write to my uncle harlowe about
resuming my own estate in pursuance of your advice but my heart failed
me when i recollected that i had not one friend to stand by or
support me in my claim and it would but the more incense them without
answering any good end oh that my cousin were but come 

is it not a sad thing beloved as i thought myself so lately by every
one that now i have not one person in the world to plead for me to
stand by me or who would afford me refuge were i to be under the
necessity of asking for it i who had the vanity to think i had as
many friends as i saw faces and flattered myself too that it was not
altogether unmerited because i saw not my maker's image either in man 
woman or child high or low rich or poor whom comparatively i
loved not as myself would to heaven my dear that you were married 
perhaps then you could have induced mr hickman to afford me
protection till these storms were over-blown but then this might have
involved him in difficulties and dangers and that i would not have done
for the world 

i don't know what to do not i god forgive me but i am very
impatient i wish but i don't know what to wish without a sin yet i
wish it would please god to take me to his mercy i can meet with none
here what a world is this what is there in it desirable the good we
hope for so strangely mixed that one knows not what to wish for and
one half of mankind tormenting the other and being tormented themselves
in tormenting for here is this my particular case my relations cannot
be happy though they make me unhappy except my brother and sister 
indeed and they seem to take delight in and enjoy the mischief they
make 

but it is time to lay down my pen since my ink runs nothing but gall 




letter ix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday morning six o'clock

mrs betty tells me there is now nothing talked of but of my going
to my uncle antony's she has been ordered she says to get ready to
attend me thither and upon my expressing my averseness to go had the
confidence to say that having heard me often praise the romanticness
of the place she was astonished her hands and eyes lifted up that i
should set myself against going to a house so much in my taste 

i asked if this was her own insolence or her young mistress's
observation 

she half-astonished me by her answer that it was hard she could not say
a good thing without being robbed of the merit of it 

as the wench looked as if she really thought she had said a good thing 
without knowing the boldness of it i let it pass but to say the
truth this creature has surprised me on many occasions with her
smartness for since she has been employed in this controuling office 
i have discovered a great deal of wit in her assurance which i never
suspected before this shews that insolence is her talent and that
fortune in placing her as a servant to my sister had not done so
kindly by her as nature for that she would make a better figure as her
companion and indeed i can't help thinking sometimes that i myself was
better fitted by nature to be the servant of both than the mistress of
the one or the servant of the other and within these few months past 
fortune has acted by me as if she were of the same mind 


friday ten o'clock

going down to my poultry-yard just now i heard my brother and sister
and that solmes laughing and triumphing together the high yew-hedge
between us which divides the yard from the garden hindered them from
seeing me 

my brother as i found has been reading part or the whole perhaps of
the copy of his last letter mighty prudent and consistent you'll say 
with their views to make me the wife of a man from whom they conceal
not what were i to be such it would be kind in them to endeavour to
conceal out of regard to my future peace but i have no doubt that
they hate me heartily 

indeed you was up with her there brother said my sister you need not
have bid her not to write to you i'll engage with all her wit she'll
never pretend to answer it 

why indeed said my brother with an air of college-sufficiency with
which he abounds for he thinks nobody writes like himself i believe
i have given her a choke-pear what say you mr solmes 

why sir said he i think it is unanswerable but will it not
exasperate he more against me 

never fear mr solmes said my brother but we'll carry our point if
she do not tire you out first we have gone too far in this method to
recede her cousin morden will soon be here so all must be over before
that time or she'll be made independent of us all 

there miss howe is the reason given for their jehu-driving 

mr solmes declared that he was determined to persevere while my
brother gave him any hopes and while my father stood firm 

my sister told my brother that he hit me charmingly on the reason why
i ought to converse with mr solmes but that he should not be so smart
upon the sex for the faults of this perverse girl 

some lively and i suppose witty answer my brother returned for he
and mr solmes laughed outrageously upon it and bella laughing too 
called him a naughty man but i heard no more of what they said they
walked on into the garden 

if you think my dear that what i have related did not again fire me 
you will find yourself mistaken when you read at this place the enclosed
copy of my letter to my brother struck off while the iron was red hot 

no more call me meek and gentle i beseech you 


to mr james harlowe

friday morning 

sir 

if notwithstanding your prohibition i should be silent on occasion of
your last you would perhaps conclude that i was consenting to go to
my uncle antony's upon the condition you mention my father must do as
he pleases with his child he may turn me out of his doors if he thinks
fit or give you leave to do it but loth as i am to say it i should
think it very hard to be carried by force to any body's house when i
have one of my own to go to 

far be it from me notwithstanding yours and my sister's provocations 
to think of my taking my estate into my own hands without my father's
leave but why if i must not stay any longer here may i not be
permitted to go thither i will engage to see nobody they would not have
me see if this favour be permitted favour i call it and am ready to
receive and acknowledge it as such although my grandfather's will has
made it a matter of right 

you ask me in a very unbrotherly manner in the postscript to your
letter if i have not some new proposals to make i have since you put
the question three or four new ones all i think though i will be
bold to say that submitting the case to any one person whom you have
not set against me my old ones ought not to have been rejected i think
this why then should i not write it nor have you any more reason to
storm at your sister for telling it you since you seem in your letter
to make it your boast how you turned my mother and my aunt hervey
against me than i have to be angry with my brother for treating me as
no brother ought to treat a sister 

these then are my new proposals 

that as above i may not be hindered from going to reside under such
conditions as shall be prescribed to me which i will most religiously
observe at my grandfather's late house i will not again in this place
call it mine i have reason to think it a great misfortune that ever it
was so indeed i have 

if this be not permitted i desire leave to go for a month or for what
time shall be thought fit to miss howe's i dare say my mother will
consent to it if i have my father's permission to go 

if this neither be allowed and i am to be turned out of my father's
house i beg i may be suffered to go to my aunt hervey's where i will
inviolably observe her commands and those of my father and mother 

but if this neither is to be granted it is my humble request that i
may be sent to my uncle harlowe's instead of my uncle antony's i mean
not by this any disrespect to my uncle antony but his moat with his
bridge threatened to be drawn up and perhaps the chapel there terrify
me beyond expression notwithstanding your witty ridicule upon me for
that apprehension 

if this likewise be refused and if i must be carried to the
moated-house which used to be a delightful one to me let it be
promised me that i shall not be compelled to receive mr solmes's
visits there and then i will as cheerfully go as ever i did 

so here sir are your new proposals and if none of them answer
your end as each of them tends to the exclusion of that ungenerous
persister's visits be pleased to know that there is no misfortune i
will not submit to rather than yield to give my hand to the man to whom
i can allow no share in my heart 

if i write in a style different from my usual and different from what
i wished to have occasion to write an impartial person who knew what i
have accidentally within this hour past heard from your mouth and my
sister's and a third person's particularly the reason you give
for driving on at this violent rate to wit my cousin morden's
soon-expected arrival would think i have but too much reason for it 
then be pleased to remember sir that when my whining vocatives have
subjected me to so much scorn and ridicule it is time were it but to
imitate examples so excellent as you and my sister set me that i should
endeavour to assert my character in order to be thought less an alien 
and nearer of kin to you both than either of you have of late seemed to
suppose me 

give me leave in order to empty my female quiver at once to add that
i know no other reason which you can have for forbidding me to reply to
you after you have written what you pleased to me than that you are
conscious you cannot answer to reason and to justice the treatment you
have given me 

if it be otherwise i an unlearned an unlogical girl younger by near
a third than yourself will venture so assured am i of the justice of
my cause to put my fate upon an issue with you with you sir who have
had the advantage of an academical education whose mind must have been
strengthened by observation and learned conversation and who pardon
my going so low have been accustomed to give choke-pears to those you
vouchsafe to write against 

any impartial person your late tutor for instance or the pious and
worthy dr lewen may be judge between us and if either give it against
me i will promise to resign to my destiny provided if it be given
against you that my father will be pleased only to allow of my negative
to the person so violently sought to be imposed upon me 

i flatter myself brother that you will the readier come into this
proposal as you seem to have a high opinion of your talents for
argumentation and not a low one of the cogency of the arguments
contained in your last letter and if i can possibly have no advantage
in a contention with you if the justice of my cause affords me not any
 as you have no opinion it will it behoves you methinks to shew to
an impartial moderator that i am wrong and you not so 

if this be accepted there is a necessity for its being carried on
by the pen the facts being stated and agreed upon by both and the
decision to be given according to the force of the arguments each shall
produce in support of their side of the question for give me leave
to say i know too well the manliness of your temper to offer at a
personal debate with you 

if it be not accepted i shall conclude that you cannot defend your
conduct towards me and shall only beg of you that for the future you
will treat me with the respect due to a sister from a brother who would
be thought as polite as learned 

and now sir if i have seemed to shew some spirit not foreign to the
relation i have the honour to be to you and to my sister and which may
be deemed not altogether of a piece with that part of my character which
once it seems gained me every one's love be pleased to consider to
whom and to what it is owing and that this part of that character was
not dispensed with till it subjected me to that scorn and to those
insults which a brother who has been so tenacious of an independence
voluntarily given up by me and who has appeared so exalted upon it 
ought not to have shewn to any body much less to a weak and defenceless
sister who is notwithstanding an affectionate and respectful one and
would be glad to shew herself to be so upon all future occasions as she
has in every action of her past life although of late she has met with
such unkind returns 

cl harlowe


 


see my dear the force and volubility as i may say of passion for
the letter i send you is my first draught struck off without a blot or
erasure 


 


friday three o'clock

as soon as i had transcribed it i sent it down to my brother by mrs 
betty 

the wench came up soon after all aghast with a laud miss what have
you done what have you written for you have set them all in a joyful
uproar 


 


my sister is but this moment gone from me she came up all in a flame 
which obliged me abruptly to lay down my pen she ran to me 

o spirit said she tapping my neck a little too hard and is it come to
this at last 

do you beat me bella 

do you call this beating you only tapping you shoulder thus said
she tapping again more gently this is what we expected it would come
to you want to be independent my father has lived too long for you 

i was going to speak with vehemence but she put her handkerchief
before my mouth very rudely you have done enough with your pen mean
listener as you are but know that neither your independent scheme 
nor any of your visiting ones will be granted you take your course 
perverse one call in your rake to help you to an independence upon
your parents and a dependence upon him do so prepare this
moment resolve what you will take with you to-morrow you go depend
upon it to-morrow you go no longer shall you stay here watching
and creeping about to hearken to what people say tis determined 
child you go to-morrow my brother would have come up to tell you so 
but i persuaded him to the contrary for i know not what had become
of you if he had such a letter such an insolent such a
conceited challenger o thou vain creature but prepare yourself i
say to-morrow you go my brother will accept of your bold challenge 
but it must be personal and at my uncle antony's or perhaps at mr 
solmes's 

thus she ran on almost foaming with passion till quite out of
patience i said no more of your violence bella had i known in what
way you designed to come up you should not have found my chamber-door
open talk to your servant in this manner unlike you as i bless god i
am i am nevertheless your sister and let me tell you that i won't go
to-morrow nor next day nor next day to that except i am dragged away
by violence 

what not if your father or mother command it girl said she intending
another word by her pause and manner before it came out 

let it come to that bella then i shall know what to say but it shall
be from their own mouths if i do not from yours nor you betty's and
say another word to me in this manner and be the consequence what it
may i will force myself into their presence and demand what i have
done to be used thus 

come along child come along meekness taking my hand and leading me
towards the door demand it of them now you'll find both your despised
parents together what does your heart fail you for i resisted 
being thus insolently offered to be led and pulled my hand from her 

i want not to be led said i and since i can plead your invitation i
will go and was posting to the stairs accordingly in my passion but
she got between me and the door and shut it 

let me first bold one said she apprize them of your visit for your
own sake let me for my brother is with them but yet opening it again 
seeing me shrink back go if you will why don't you go why don't
you go miss following me to my closet whither i retired with my
heart full and pulled the sash-door after me and could no longer hold
in my tears 

nor would i answer one word to her repeated aggravations nor to her
demands upon me to open my door for the key was on the inside nor so
much as turn my head towards her as she looked through the glass at me 
and at last which vexed her to the heart i drew the silk curtain that
she should not see me and down she went muttering all the way 

is not this usage enough to provoke a rashness never before thought of 

as it is but too probable that i may be hurried away to my uncle's
without being able to give you previous notice of it i beg that as soon
as you shall hear of such a violence you would send to the usual place 
to take back such of your letters as may not have reached my hands or
to fetch any of mine that may be there 

may you my dear be always happy prays you clarissa harlowe 

i have received your four letters but am in such a ferment that i
cannot at present write to them 




letter x

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday night march 24 


i have a most provoking letter from my sister i might have supposed she
would resent the contempt she brought upon herself in my chamber her
conduct surely can only be accounted for by the rage instigate by a
supposed rivalry 


to miss clarissa harlowe

i am to tell you that your mother has begged you off for the morrow 
but that you have effectually done your business with her as well as
with every body else 

in your proposals and letter to your brother you have shewn yourself so
silly and so wise so young and so old so gentle and so obstinate 
so meek and so violent that never was there so mixed a character 

we all know of whom you have borrowed this new spirit and yet the seeds
of it must be in your heart or it could not all at once shew itself so
rampant it would be doing mr solmes a spite to wish him such a shy 
un-shy girl another of your contradictory qualities i leave you to
make out what i mean by it 

here miss your mother will not let you remain she cannot have any
peace of mind while such a rebel of a child is so near her your aunt
hervey will not take a charge which all the family put together cannot
manage your uncle harlowe will not see you at his house till you are
married so thanks to your own stubbornness you have nobody that will
receive you but your uncle antony thither you must go in a very
few days and when there your brother will settle with you in my
presence all that relates to your modest challenge for it is accepted 
i assure you dr lewen will possibly be there since you make choice of
him another gentleman likewise were it but to convince you that he is
another sort of man than you have taken him to be your two uncles
will possibly be there too to see that the poor weak and defenceless
sister has fair play so you see miss what company your smart
challenge will draw together 

prepare for the day you'll soon be called upon adieu mamma norton's
sweet child 

arab harlowe 


 


i transcribed this letter and sent it to my mother with these lines 


a very few words my ever-honoured mamma 

if my sister wrote the enclosed by my father's direction or yours i
must submit to the usage she gave me in it with this only observation 
that it is short of the personal treatment i have received from her 
if it be of her own head why then madam but i knew that when i was
banished from your presence yet till i know if she has or has not
authority for this usage i will only write further that i am

your very unhappy child cl harlowe 


 


this answer i received in an open slip of paper but it was wet in one
place i kissed the place for i am sure it was blistered as i may
say by a mother's tear she must i hope she must have written it
reluctantly 


to apply for protection where authority is defied is bold your
sister who would not in your circumstances have been guilty of your
perverseness may allowably be angry at you for it however we have
told her to moderate her zeal for our insulted authority see if you
can deserve another behaviour than that you complain of which cannot 
however be so grievous to you as the cause of it is to

your more unhappy mother 

how often must i forbid you any address to me 


 


give me my dearest miss howe your opinion what i can what i ought
to do not what you would do pushed as i am pushed in resentment or
passion since so instigated you tell me that you should have been
with somebody before now and steps taken in passion hardly ever fail
of giving cause for repentance but acquaint me with what you think
cool judgment and after-reflection whatever were to be the event will
justify 

i doubt not your sympathizing love but yet you cannot possibly feel
indignity and persecution so very sensibly as the immediate sufferer
feels them are fitter therefore to advise me than i am myself 

i will here rest my cause have i or have i not suffered or borne
enough and if they will still persevere if that strange persister
against an antipathy so strongly avowed will still persist say what
can i do what course pursue shall i fly to london and endeavour to
hide myself from lovelace as well as from all my own relations till
my cousin morden arrives or shall i embark for leghorn in my way to my
cousin yet my sex my youth considered how full of danger is this
last measure and may not my cousin be set out for england while i
am getting thither what can i do tell me tell me my dearest miss
howe  for i dare not trust myself   tell me what i can do 

eleven o'clock at night 

i have been forced to try to compose my angry passions at my
harpsichord having first shut close my doors and windows that i might
not be heard below as i was closing the shutters of the windows the
distant whooting of the bird of minerva as from the often-visited
woodhouse gave the subject in that charming ode to wisdom which does
honour to our sex as it was written by one of it i made an essay a
week ago to set the three last stanzas of it as not unsuitable to my
unhappy situation and after i had re-perused the ode those were
my lesson and i am sure in the solemn address they contain to the
all-wise and all-powerful deity my heart went with my fingers 

i enclose the ode and my effort with it the subject is solemn my
circumstances are affecting and i flatter myself that i have not been
quite unhappy in the performance if it obtain your approbation i shall
be out of doubt and should be still more assured could i hear it tried
by your voice and finger 



ode to wisdom by a lady


 i 
 the solitary bird of night
 thro' thick shades now wings his flight 
 and quits his time-shook tow'r 
 where shelter'd from the blaze of day 
 in philosophic gloom he lay 
 beneath his ivy bow'r 

 ii 
 with joy i hear the solemn sound 
 which midnight echoes waft around 
 and sighing gales repeat 
 fav'rite of pallas i attend 
 and faithful to thy summons bend
 at wisdom's awful seat 

 iii 
 she loves the cool the silent eve 
 where no false shows of life deceive 
 beneath the lunar ray 
 here folly drops each vain disguise 
 nor sport her gaily colour'd dyes 
 as in the beam of day 

 iv 
 o pallas queen of ev'ry art 
 that glads the sense and mends the heart 
 blest source of purer joys 
 in ev'ry form of beauty bright 
 that captivates the mental sight
 with pleasure and surprise 

 v 
 to thy unspotted shrine i bow 
 attend thy modest suppliant's vow 
 that breathes no wild desires 
 but taught by thy unerring rules 
 to shun the fruitless wish of fools 
 to nobler views aspires 

 vi 
 not fortune's gem ambition's plume 
 nor cytherea's fading bloom 
 be objects of my prayer 
 let av'rice vanity and pride 
 those envy'd glitt'ring toys divide 
 the dull rewards of care 

 vii 
 to me thy better gifts impart 
 each moral beauty of the heart 
 by studious thought refin'd 
 for wealth the smile of glad content 
 for pow'r its amplest best extent 
 an empire o'er my mind 

 viii 
 when fortune drops her gay parade 
 when pleasure's transient roses fade 
 and wither in the tomb 
 unchang'd is thy immortal prize 
 thy ever-verdant laurels rise
 in undecaying bloom 

 ix 
 by thee protected i defy
 the coxcomb's sneer the stupid lie
 of ignorance and spite 
 alike contemn the leaden fool 
 and all the pointed ridicule
 of undiscerning wit 

 x 
 from envy hurry noise and strife 
 the dull impertinence of life 
 in thy retreat i rest 
 pursue thee to the peaceful groves 
 where plato's sacred spirit roves 
 in all thy beauties drest 

 xi 
 he bad ilyssus' tuneful stream
 convey thy philosophic theme
 of perfect fair and good 
 attentive athens caught the sound 
 and all her list'ning sons around
 in awful silence stood 

 xii 
 reclaim'd her wild licentious youth 
 confess'd the potent voice of truth 
 and felt its just controul 
 the passions ceas'd their loud alarms 
 and virtue's soft persuasive charms
 o'er all their senses stole 

 xiii 
 thy breath inspires the poet's song
 the patriot's free unbiass'd tongue 
 the hero's gen'rous strife 
 thine are retirement's silent joys 
 and all the sweet engaging ties
 of still domestic life 

 xiv 
 no more to fabled names confin'd 
 to thee supreme all perfect mind 
 my thought direct their flight 
 wisdom's thy gift and all her force
 from thee deriv'd eternal source
 of intellectual light 

 xv 
 o send her sure her steady ray 
 to regulate my doubtful way 
 thro' life's perplexing road 
 the mists of error to controul 
 and thro' its gloom direct my soul
 to happiness and good 

 xvi 
 beneath her clear discerning eye
 the visionary shadows fly
 of folly's painted show 
 she sees thro' ev'ry fair disguise 
 that all but virtue's solid joys 
 is vanity and woe 

 facsimile of the music to the ode to wisdom verse 14  




letter xi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday midnight 


i have now a calmer moment envy ambition high and selfish resentment 
and all the violent passions are now most probably asleep all around
me and shall now my own angry ones give way to the silent hour and
subside likewise they have given way to it and i have made use of
the gentler space to re-peruse your last letters i will touch upon
some passages in them and that i may the less endanger the but-just
recovered calm i will begin with what you write about mr hickman 

give me leave to say that i am sorry you cannot yet persuade yourself
to think better that is to say more justly of that gentleman than
your whimsical picture of him shews you so or at least than the
humourousness of your natural vein would make one think you do 

i do not imagine that you yourself will say he sat for the picture
you have drawn and yet upon the whole it is not greatly to his
disadvantage were i at ease in my mind i would venture to draw a much
more amiable and just likeness 

if mr hickman has not that assurance which some men have he has that
humility and gentleness which many want and which with the infinite
value he has for you will make him one of the fittest husbands in the
world for a person of your vivacity and spirit 

although you say i would not like him myself i do assure you if mr 
solmes were such a man as mr hickman in person mind and behaviour 
my friends and i had never disagreed about him if they would not have
permitted me to live single mr lovelace having such a character as
he has would have stood no chance with me this i can the more boldly
aver because i plainly perceive that of the two passions love
and fear this man will be able to inspire one with a much greater
proportion of the latter than i imagine is compatible with the former 
to make a happy marriage 

i am glad you own that you like no one better than mr hickman in a
little while i make no doubt you will be able if you challenge
your heart upon it to acknowledge that you like not any man so well 
especially when you come to consider that the very faults you find in
mr hickman admirably fit him to make you happy that is to say if it
be necessary to your happiness that you should have your own will in
every thing 

but let me add one thing and that is this you have such a sprightly
turn that with your admirable talents you would make any man in the
world who loved you look like a fool except he were such a one as
lovelace 

forgive me my dear for my frankness and forgive me also for so soon
returning to subject so immediately relative to myself as those i now
must touch upon 

you again insist strengthened by mr lovelace's opinion upon my
assuming my own estate  i cannot call it resuming having never been
in possession of it  and i have given you room to expect that i will
consider this subject more closely than i have done before i must
however own that the reasons which i had to offer against taking
your advice were so obvious that i thought you would have seen
them yourself and been determined by them against your own hastier
counsel but since this has not been so and that both you and mr 
lovelace call upon me to assume my own estate i will enter briefly into
the subject 

in the first place let me ask you my dear supposing i were inclined
to follow your advice whom have i to support me in my demand my uncle
harlowe is one of my trustees he is against me my cousin morden is the
other he is in italy and very probably may be set against me too 
my brother has declared that they are resolved to carry their points
before he arrives so that as they drive on all will probably be
decided before i can have an answer from him were i to write and 
confined as i am were the answer to come in time and they did not like
it they would keep it from me 

in the next place parents have great advantages in every eye over the
child if she dispute their pleasure in the disposing of her and so
they ought since out of twenty instances perhaps two could not be
produced when they were not in the right the child in the wrong 

you would not i am sure have me accept of mr lovelace's offered
assistance in such a claim if i would embrace any other person's who
else would care to appear for a child against parents ever till of
late so affectionate but were such a protector to be found what a
length of time would it take up in a course of litigation the will and
the deeds have flaws in them they say my brother sometimes talks
of going to reside at the grove i suppose with a design to make
ejectments necessary were i to offer at assuming or were i to marry
mr lovelace in order to give him all the opposition and difficulty the
law would help him to give 

these cases i have put to myself for argument-sake but they are
all out of the question although any body were to be found who would
espouse my cause for i do assure you i would sooner beg my bread than
litigate for my right with my father since i am convinced that whether
the parent do his duty by the child or not the child cannot be excused
from doing hers to him and to go to law with my father what a
sound has that you will see that i have mentioned my wish as an
alternative and as a favour to be permitted if i must be put out of
his house to go thither but not one step further can i go and you see
how this is resented 

upon the whole then what have i to hope for but a change in my
father's resolution and is there any probability of that such an
ascendancy as my brother and sister have obtained over every body 
and such an interest to pursue the enmity they have now openly avowed
against me 

as to mr lovelace's approbation of your assumption-scheme i wonder not
at he very probably penetrates the difficulties i should have to bring
it to effect without his assistance were i to find myself as free as i
would wish myself to be perhaps mr lovelace would stand a worse chance
with me than his vanity may permit him to imagine notwithstanding the
pleasure you take in rallying me on his account how know you but
all that appears to be specious and reasonable in his offers such as 
standing his chance for my favour after i became independent as i may
call it  by which i mean no more than to have the liberty of refusing
for my husband a man whom it hurts me but to think of in that light  
and such as his not visiting me but by my leave and till mr morden
come and till i am satisfied of his reformation how know you i say 
that he gives not himself these airs purely to stand better in your
graces as well as mine by offering of his own accord conditions which
he must needs think would be insisted on were the case to happen 

then am i utterly displeased with him to threaten as he threatens yet
to pretend that it is not to intimidate me and to beg of you not to
tell me when he must know you would and no doubt intended that you
should is so meanly artful the man must think he has a frightened
fool to deal with i to join hands with such a man of violence my
own brother the man whom he threatens and what has mr solmes done to
him is he to be blamed if he thinks a person would make a wife worth
having to endeavour to obtain her oh that my friends would but
leave me to my own way in this one point for have i given the man
encouragement sufficient to ground these threats upon were mr solmes a
man to whom i could but be indifferent it might be found that to have
spirit would very little answer the views of that spirit it is my
fortune to be treated as a fool by my brother but mr lovelace shall
find yet i will let him know my mind and then it will come with a
better grace to your knowledge 

mean time give me leave to tell you that it goes against me in my
cooler moments unnatural as my brother is to me to have you my dear 
who are my other self write such very severe reflections upon him in
relation to the advantage lovelace had over him he is not indeed your
brother but remember that you write to his sister upon my word my
dear miss howe you dip your pen in gall whenever you are offended and
i am almost ready to question whether i read some of your expressions
against others of my relations as well as him although in my favour 
whether you are so thoroughly warranted to call other people to account
for their warmth should we not be particularly careful to keep clear
of the faults we censure and yet i am so angry both at my brother and
sister that i should not have taken this liberty with my dear friend 
notwithstanding i know you never loved them had you not made so light
of so shocking a transaction where a brother's life was at stake when
his credit in the eye of the mischievous sex has received a still deeper
wound than he personally sustained and when a revival of the same
wicked resentments which may end more fatally is threatened 

his credit i say in the eye of the mischievous sex who is not
warranted to call it so when it is re as the two libertines his
companions gloried to resolve never to give a challenge and among whom
duelling is so fashionable a part of brutal bravery that the man of
temper who is mostly i believe the truly brave man is often at
a loss so to behave as to avoid incurring either a mortal guilt or a
general contempt 

to enlarge a little upon this subject may we not infer that those who
would be guilty of throwing these contempts upon a man of temper who
would rather pass by a verbal injury than to imbrue his hands in blood 
know not the measure of true magnanimity nor how much nobler it is to
forgive and even how much more manly to despise than to resent an
injury were i a man methinks i should have too much scorn for a
person who could wilfully do me a mean wrong to put a value upon his
life equal to what i put upon my own what an absurdity because a man
had done me a small injury that i should put it in his power at least 
to an equal risque to do me and those who love me an irreparable
one were it not a wilful injury nor avowed to be so there could not
be room for resentment 

how willingly would i run away from myself and what most concerns
myself if i could this digression brings me back again to the occasion
of it and that to the impatience i was in when i ended my last
letter for my situation is not altered i renew therefore my former
earnestness as the new day approaches and will bring with it perhaps
new trials that you will as undivestedly as possible of favour or
resentment tell me what you would have me do for if i am obliged to
go to my uncle antony's all i doubt will be over with me yet how to
avoid it that's the difficulty 

i shall deposit this the first thing when you have it lose no time i
pray you to advise lest it be too late 

your ever obliged cl harlowe 




letter xii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe saturday march 25 


what can i advise you to do my noble creature your merit is your
crime you can no more change your nature than your persecutors can
theirs your distress is owing to the vast disparity between you and
them what would you have of them do they not act in character and to
whom to an alien you are not one of them they have two dependencies
in their hope to move you to compliance upon their impenetrableness
one  i'd give it a more proper name if i dared  the other on the
regard you have always had for your character  have they not heretofore
owned as much   and upon your apprehensions from that of lovelace which
would discredit you should you take any step by his means to extricate
yourself then they know that resentment and unpersuadableness are not
natural to you and that the anger they have wrought you up to will
subside as all extraordinaries soon do and that once married you will
make the best of it 

but surely your father's son and eldest daughter have a view by
communicating to so narrow a soul all they know of your just aversion to
him to entail unhappiness for life upon you were you to have the man
who is already more nearly related to them than ever he can be to you 
although the shocking compulsion should take place 

as to that wretch's perseverance those only who know not the man 
will wonder at it he has not the least delicacy his principal view in
marriage is not to the mind how shall those beauties be valued which
cannot be comprehended were you to be his and shew a visible want of
tenderness to him it is my opinion he would not be much concerned at
it i have heard you well observe from your mrs norton that a person
who has any over-ruling passion will compound by giving up twenty
secondary or under-satisfactions though more laudable ones in order to
have that gratified 

i'll give you the substance of a conversation  no fear you can be made
to like him worse than you do already  that passed between sir harry
downeton and this solmes but three days ago as sir harry told it but
yesterday to my mother and me it will confirm to you that what your
sister's insolent betty reported he should say of governing by fear 
was not of her own head 

sir harry told her he wondered he should wish to obtain you so much
against you inclination as every body knew it would be if he did 

he matter'd not that he said coy maids made the fondest wives  a
sorry fellow   it would not at all grieve him to see a pretty woman make
wry faces if she gave him cause to vex her and your estate by the
convenience of its situation would richly pay him for all he could bear
with your shyness 

he should be sure he said after a while of your complaisance if not
of your love and in that should be happier than nine parts in ten of
his married acquaintance 

what a wretch is this 

for the rest your known virtue would be as great a security to him as
he could wish for 

she will look upon you said sir harry if she be forced to marry you 
as elizabeth of france did upon philip ii of spain when he received
her on his frontiers as her husband who was to have been but her
father-in-law that is with fear and terror rather than with
complaisance and love and you will perhaps be as surly to her as that
old monarch was to his young bride 

fear and terror the wretch the horrid wretch said looked pretty in
a bride as well as in a wife and laughing  yes my dear the hideous
fellow laughed immoderately as sir harry told us when he said it   it
should be his care to perpetuate the occasion for that fear if he could
not think he had the love and truly he was of opinion that if
love and fear must be separated in matrimony the man who made himself
feared fared best 

if my eyes would carry with them the execution which the eyes of the
basilisk are said to do i would make it my first business to see this
creature 

my mother however says it would be a prodigious merit in you if you
could get over your aversion to him where asks she  as you have been
asked before  is the praise-worthiness of obedience if it be only paid
in instance where we give up nothing 

what a fatality that you have no better an option either a scylla or a
charybdis 

were it not you i should know how barbarously as you are used to
advise you in a moment but such a noble character to suffer from a
 supposed rashness and indiscretion of such a nature would as i have
heretofore observed be a wound to the sex 

while i was in hope that the asserting of your own independence would
have helped you i was pleased that you had one resource as i thought 
but now that you have so well proved that such a step would not avail
you i am entirely at a loss what to say 

i will lay down my pen and think 


 


i have considered and considered again but i protest i know no more
what to say now than before only this that i am young like yourself 
and have a much weaker judgment and stronger passions than you have 

i have heretofore said that you have offered as much as you ought in
offering to live single if you were never to marry the estate they are
so loth should go out of their name would in time i suppose revert
to your brother and he or his would have it perhaps much more
certainly this way than by the precarious reversions which solmes makes
them hope for have you put this into their odd heads my dear the
tyrant word authority as they use it can be the only objection against
this offer 

one thing you must consider that if you leave your parents your duty
and love will not suffer you to justify yourself by an appeal against
them and so you'll have the world against you and should lovelace
continue his wild life and behave ungratefully to you will not his
baseness seem to justify their cruel treatment of you as well as their
dislike of him 

may heaven direct you for the best i can only say that for my own
part i would do any thing go any where rather than be compelled to
marry the man i hate and were he such a man as solmes must always
hate nor could i have borne what you have borne if from father and
uncles not from brother and sister 

my mother will have it that after they have tried their utmost efforts
to bring you into their measures and find them ineffectual they will
recede but i cannot say i am of her mind she does not own she has
any authority for this but her own conjecture i should otherwise have
hoped that your uncle antony and she had been in on one secret and
that favourable to you woe be to one of them at least  to you uncle to
be sure i mean  if they should be in any other 

you must if possible avoid being carried to that uncle's the man the
parson your brother and sister present they'll certainly there marry
you to the wretch nor will your newly-raised spirit support you in your
resistance on such an occasion your meekness will return and you
will have nothing for it but tears  tears despised by them all  and
ineffectual appeals and lamentations and these tears when the ceremony
is profaned you must suddenly dry up and endeavour to dispose of
yourself to such a humble frame of mind as may induce your new-made
lord to forgive all your past declarations of aversion 

in short my dear you must then blandish him over with a confession 
that all your past behaviour was maidenly reserve only and it will be
your part to convince him of the truth of his imprudent sarcasm that
the coyest maids make the fondest wives thus will you enter the state
with a high sense of obligation to his forgiving goodness and if you
will not be kept to it by that fear by which he proposes to govern i
am much mistaken 

yet after all i must leave the point undetermined and only to be
determined as you find they recede from their avowed purpose or
resolve to remove you to your uncle antony's but i must repeat my
wishes that something may fall out that neither of these men may call
you his and may you live single my dearest friend till some man
shall offer that may be as worthy of you as man can be 

but yet methinks i would not that you who are so admirably qualified
to adorn the married state should be always single you know i am
incapable of flattery and that i always speak and write the sincerest
dictates of my heart nor can you from what you must know of your
own merit taken only in a comparative light with others doubt my
sincerity for why should a person who delight to find out and admire
every thing that is praise-worthy in another be supposed ignorant of
like perfections in herself when she could not so much admire them in
another if she had them not herself and why may not i give her those
praises which she would give to any other who had but half of her
excellencies especially when she is incapable of pride and vain-glory 
and neither despises others for the want of her fine qualities nor
overvalues herself upon them over-values did i say how can that be 

forgive me my beloved friend my admiration of you increased as it
is by every letter you write will not always be held down in silence 
although in order to avoid offending you i generally endeavour to keep
it from flowing to my pen when i write to you or to my lips whenever
i have the happiness to be in your company 

i will add nothing though i could add a hundred things on account of
your latest communications but that i am

your ever affectionate and faithful anna howe 

i hope i have pleased you with my dispatch i wish i had been able to
please you with my requested advice 

you have given new beauties to the charming ode which you have
transmitted to me what pity that the wretches you have to deal with 
put you out of your admirable course in the pursuit of which like the
sun you was wont to cheer and illuminate all you shone upon 




letter xiii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sunday morning march 26 


how soothing a thing is praise from those we love whether conscious
or not of deserving it it cannot but give us great delight to see
ourselves stand high in the opinion of those whose favour we are
ambitious to cultivate an ingenuous mind will make this farther use of
it that if he be sensible that it does not already deserve the charming
attributes it will hasten before its friend finds herself mistaken to
obtain the graces it is complimented for and this it will do as well
in honour to itself as to preserve its friend's opinion and justify
her judgment may this be always my aim and then you will not only
give the praise but the merit and i shall be more worthy of that
friendship which is the only pleasure i have to boast of 

most heartily i thank you for the kind dispatch of your last favour how
much am i indebted to you and even to your honest servant under what
obligations does my unhappy situation lay me 

but let me answer the kind contents of it as well as i may 

as to getting over my disgusts to mr solmes it is impossible to
be done while he wants generosity frankness of heart benevolence 
manners and every qualification that distinguishes the worthy man o my
dear what a degree of patience what a greatness of soul is required
in the wife not to despise a husband who is more ignorant more
illiterate more low-minded than herself the wretch vested with
prerogatives who will claim rule in virtue of them and not to permit
whose claim will be as disgraceful to the prescribing wife as to the
governed husband how shall such a husband as this be borne were he 
for reasons of convenience and interest even to be our choice but 
to be compelled to have such a one and that compulsion to arise from
motives as unworthy of the prescribers as of the prescribed who can
think of getting over an aversion so justly founded how much easier to
bear the temporary persecutions i labour under because temporary than
to resolve to be such a man's for life were i to comply must i not
leave my relations and go to him a month will decide the one perhaps 
but what a duration of woe will the other be every day it is likely 
rising to witness to some new breach of an altar-vowed duty 

then my dear the man seems already to be meditating vengeance against
me for an aversion i cannot help for yesterday my saucy gaoleress
assured me that all my oppositions would not signify that pinch of
snuff holding out her genteel finger and thumb that i must have mr 
solmes that therefore i had not best carry my jest too far for that
mr solmes was a man of spirit and had told her that as i should
surely be his i acted very unpolitely since if he had not more mercy
 that was her word i know not if it were his  than i had i might have
cause to repent the usage i gave him to the last day of my life but
enough of this man who by what you repeat from sir harry downeton 
has all the insolence of his sex without any one quality to make that
insolence tolerable 

i have receive two letters from mr lovelace since his visit to you 
which make three that i have not answered i doubt not his being very
uneasy but in his last he complains in high terms of my silence not
in the still small voice or rather style of an humble lover but in a
style like that which would probably be used by a slighted protector 
and his pride is again touched that like a thief or eves-dropper he
is forced to dodge about in hopes of a letter and returns five miles
 and then to an inconvenient lodging without any 

his letters and the copy of mine to him shall soon attend you till
when i will give you the substance of what i wrote him yesterday 

i take him severely to task for his freedom in threatening me through
you with a visit to mr solmes or to my brother i say that surely 
i must be thought to be a creature fit to bear any thing that violence
and menaces from some of my own family are not enough for me to bear in
order to make me avoid him but that i must have them from him too if
i oblige those to whom it is both my inclination and duty to oblige in
every thing that is reasonable and in my power 

very extraordinary i tell him that a violent spirit shall threaten to
do a rash and unjustifiable thing which concerns me but a little and
himself a great deal if i do not something as rash my character and
sex considered to divert him from it 

i even hint that however it would affect me were any mischief to
happen on my own account yet there are persons as far as i know who
in my case would not think there would be reason for much regret were
such a committed rashness as he threatens mr solmes with to rid her of
two persons whom had she never known she had never been unhappy 

this is plain-dealing my dear and i suppose he will put it into still
plainer english for me 

i take his pride to task on his disdaining to watch for my letters and
for his eves-dropping language and say that surely he has the less
reason to think so hardly of his situation since his faulty morals
are the cause of all and since faulty morals deservedly level all
distinction and bring down rank and birth to the canaille and to the
necessity which he so much regrets of appearing if i must descent to
his language as an eves-dropper and a thief and then i forbid him
ever to expect another letter from me that is to subject him to such
disgraceful hardships 

as to the solemn vows and protestations he is so ready upon all
occasions to make they have the less weight with me i tell him 
as they give a kind of demonstration that he himself from his own
character thinks there is reason to make them deeds are to me the
only evidence of intentions and i am more and more convinced of
the necessity of breaking off a correspondence with a person whose
addresses i see it is impossible either to expect my friends to
encourage or him to appear to wish that they should think him worthy of
encouragement 

what therefore i repeatedly desire is that since his birth alliances 
and expectations are such as will at any time if his immoral character
be not an objection procure him at least equal advantages in a woman
whose taste and inclinations moreover might be better adapted to
his own i insist upon it as well as advise it that he give up all
thoughts of me and the rather as he has all along by his threatening
and unpolite behaviour to my friends and whenever he speaks of them 
given me reason to conclude that there is more malice in them than
regard to me in his perseverance 

this is the substance of the letter i have written to him 

the man to be sure must have the penetration to observe that my
correspondence with him hitherto is owing more to the severity i meet
with than to a very high value for him and so i would have him think 
what a worse than moloch deity is that which expects an offering of
reason duty and discretion to be made to its shrine 

your mother is of opinion you say that at last my friends will relent 
heaven grant that they may but my brother and sister have such an
influence over every body and are so determined so pique themselves
upon subduing me and carrying their point that i despair that they
will and yet if they do not i frankly own i would not scruple to
throw myself upon any not disreputable protection by which i might
avoid my present persecutions on one hand and not give mr lovelace
advantage over me on the other that is to say were there manifestly
no other way left me for if there were i should think the leaving my
father's house without his consent one of the most inexcusable actions
i could be guilty of were the protection to be ever so unexceptionable 
and this notwithstanding the independent fortune willed me by my
grandfather and indeed i have often reflected with a degree of
indignation and disdain upon the thoughts of what a low selfish
creature that child must be who is to be reined in only by the hopes of
what a parent can or will do for her 

but notwithstanding all this i owe it to the sincerity of friendship to
confess that i know not what i should have done had your advice been
conclusive any way had you my dear been witness to my different
emotions as i read your letter when in one place you advise me of
my danger if i am carried to my uncle's in another when you own you
could not bear what i bear and would do any thing rather than marry
the man you hate yet in another to represent to me my reputation
suffering in the world's eye and the necessity i should be under to
justify my conduct at the expense of my friends were i to take a rash
step in another insinuate the dishonest figure i should be forced to
make in so compelled a matrimony endeavouring to cajole fawn upon 
and play the hypocrite with a man to whom i have an aversion who would
have reason to believe me an hypocrite as well from my former avowals 
as from the sense he must have if common sense he has of his own
demerits the necessity you think there would be for me the more averse
 were i capable of so much dissimulation that would be imputable to
disgraceful motives as it would be too visible that love either of
person or mind could be neither of them then his undoubted his even
constitutional narrowness his too probably jealousy and unforgiveness 
bearing in my mind my declared aversion and the unfeigned despights i
took all opportunities to do him in order to discourage his address 
a preference avowed against him from the same motive with the pride he
professes to take in curbing and sinking the spirits of a woman he had
acquired a right to tyrannize over had you i say been witness of
my different emotions as i read now leaning this way now that now
perplexed now apprehensive now angry at one then at another now
resolving now doubting you would have seen the power you have over me 
and would have had reason to believe that had you given your advice
in any determined or positive manner i had been ready to have
been concluded by it so my dear you will find from these
acknowledgements that you must justify me to those laws of friendship 
which require undisguised frankness of heart although you justification
of me in that particular will perhaps be at the expense of my prudence 

but upon the whole this i do repeat that nothing but the last
extremity shall make me abandon my father's house if they will permit
me to stay and if i can by any means by any honest pretences but
keep off my evil destiny in it till my cousin morden arrives as one
of my trustees his is a protection into which i may without discredit
throw myself if my other friends should remain determined and this
 although they seem too well aware of it is all my hope for as
to lovelace were i to be sure of his tenderness and even of his
reformation must not the thought of embracing the offered protection of
his family be the same thing in the world's eye as accepting of his
own could i avoid receiving his visits at his own relations' must i
not be his whatever on seeing him in a nearer light i should find
him out to be for you know it has always been my observation that
very few people in courtship see each other as they are oh my dear 
how wise have i endeavoured to be how anxious to choose and to avoid
every thing precautiously as i may say that might make me happy 
or unhappy yet all my wisdom now by a strange fatality is likely to
become foolishness 

then you tell me in your usual kindly-partial manner what is expected
of me more than would be of some others this should be a lesson to me 
what ever my motives were the world would not know them to complain
of a brother's unkindness that indeed i might do differences between
brothers and sisters where interests clash but too commonly arise 
but where the severe father cannot be separated from the faulty
brother who could bear to lighten herself by loading a father then 
in this particular case must not the hatred mr lovelace expresses
to every one of my family although in return for their hatred of
him shock one extremely must it not shew that there is something
implacable as well as highly unpolite in his temper and what creature
can think of marrying so as to be out of all hopes ever to be well with
her own nearest and tenderest relations 

but here having tired myself and i dare say you i will lay down my
pen 


 


mr solmes is almost continually here so is my aunt hervey so are my
two uncles something is working against me i doubt what an uneasy
state is suspense when a naked sword too seems hanging over one's
head 

i hear nothing but what this confident creature betty throws out in
the wantonness of office now it is why miss don't you look up your
things you'll be called upon depend upon it before you are aware 
another time she intimates darkly and in broken sentences as if on
purpose to tease me what one says what another with their inquiries
how i dispose of my time and my brother's insolent question comes
frequently in whether i am not writing a history of my sufferings 

but i am now used to her pertness and as it is only through that that
i can hear of any thing intended against me before it is to be put in
execution and as when she is most impertinent she pleads a commission
for it i bear with her yet now-and-then not without a little of the
heart-burn 

i will deposit thus far adieu my dear cl harlowe 


written on the cover after she went down with a pencil 

on coming down i found your second letter of yesterday's date i
have read it and am in hopes that the enclosed will in a great measure
answer your mother's expectations of me 


 see the next letter 


my most respectful acknowledgements to her for it and for her very kind
admonitions 

you'll read to her what you please of the enclosed 




letter xiv

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe sat march 25 


i follow my last of this date by command i mentioned in my former my
mother's opinion of the merit you would have if you could oblige your
friends against your own inclination our conference upon this subject
was introduced by the conversation we had had with sir harry downeton 
and my mother thinks it of so much importance that she enjoins me to
give you the particulars of it i the rather comply as i was unable in
my last to tell what to advise you to and as you will in this recital
have my mother's opinion at least and perhaps in hers what the
world's would be were it only to know what she knows and not so much
as i know 

my mother argues upon this case in a most discouraging manner for all
such of our sex as look forward for happiness in marriage with the man
of their choice 

only that i know she has a side-view of her daughter who at the
same time that she now prefers no one to another values not the man her
mother most regards of one farthing or i should lay it more to heart 

what is there in it says she that all this bustle is about is it such
a mighty matter for a young woman to give up her inclinations to oblige
her friends 

very well my mamma thought i now may you ask this at forty you
may but what would you have said at eighteen is the question 

either said she the lady must be thought to have very violent
inclinations  and what nice young creature would have that supposed  
which she could not give up or a very stubborn will which she would
not or thirdly have parents she was indifferent about obliging 

you know my mother now-and-then argues very notably always very warmly
at least i happen often to differ from her and we both think so well
of our own arguments that we very seldom are so happy as to convince
one another a pretty common case i believe in all vehement debatings 
she says i am too witty angelice too pert i that she is too wise 
that is to say being likewise put into english not so young as she has
been in short is grown so much into mother that she has forgotten
she ever was a daughter so generally we call another cause by
consent yet fall into the old one half a dozen times over without
consent quitting and resuming with half-angry faces forced into a
smile that there might be some room to piece together again but go
a-bed if bedtime a little sullen nevertheless or if we speak her
silence is broken with an ah nancy you are so lively so quick i wish
you were less like your papa child 

i pay it off with thinking that my mother has no reason to disclaim her
share in her nancy and if the matter go off with greater severity on
her side than i wish for then her favourite hickman fares the worse for
it next day 

i know i am a saucy creature i know if i do not say so you will think
so so no more of this just now what i mention it for is to tell you 
that on this serious occasion i will omit if i can all that passed
between us that had an air of flippancy on my part or quickness on my
mother's to let you into the cool and cogent of the conversation 

look through the families said she which we both know where the man
and the woman have been said to marry for love which at the time it
is so called is perhaps no more than a passion begun in folly or
thoughtlessness and carried on from a spirit of perverseness and
opposition  here we had a parenthetical debate which i omit  and see 
if they appear to be happier than those whose principal inducement to
marry has been convenience or to oblige their friends or ever whether
they are generally so happy for convenience and duty where observed 
will afford a permanent and even an increasing satisfaction as well
at the time as upon the reflection which seldom fail to reward
themselves while love if love be the motive is an idle passion'  idle
in one sense my mother cannot say for love is as busy as a monkey and
as mischievous as a school-boy  it is a fervour that like all other
fervours lasts but a little while after marriage a bow overstrained 
that soon returns to its natural bent 

as it is founded generally upon mere notional excellencies which
were unknown to the persons themselves till attributed to either by the
other one two or three months usually sets all right on both sides 
and then with opened eyes they think of each other just as every body
else thought of them before 

the lovers imaginaries  her own notable word   are by that time gone
off nature and old habits painfully dispensed with or concealed 
return disguises thrown aside all the moles freckles and defects in
the minds of each discover themselves and tis well if each do not sink
in the opinion of the other as much below the common standard as the
blinded imagination of both had set them above it and now said she 
the fond pair who knew no felicity out of each other's company are
so far from finding the never-ending variety each had proposed in
an unrestrained conversation with the other when they seldom were
together and always parted with something to say or on recollection 
when parted wishing they had said that they are continually on the
wing in pursuit of amusements out of themselves and those concluded my
sage mamma  did you think her wisdom so very modern   will perhaps be
the livelier to each in which the other has no share 

i told my mother that if you were to take any rash step it would be
owing to the indiscreet violence of your friends i was afraid i said 
that these reflection upon the conduct of people in the married state 
who might set out with better hopes were but too well grounded but
that this must be allowed me that if children weighed not these matters
so thoroughly as they ought neither did parents make those allowances
for youth inclination and inexperience which had been found necessary
to be made for themselves at their children's time of life 

i remembered a letter i told her hereupon which you wrote a few
months ago personating an anonymous elderly lady in mr wyerley's
day of plaguing you to miss drayton's mother who by her severity and
restraints had like to have driven the young lady into the very fault
against which her mother was most solicitous to guard her and i dared
to say she would be pleased with it 

i fetched the first draught of it which at my request you obliged me
at the time and read the whole letter to my mother but the following
passage she made me read twice i think you once told me you had not a
copy of this letter 

permit me madam  says the personated grave writer   to observe that
if persons of your experience would have young people look forward in
order to be wiser and better by their advice it would be kind in them
to look backward and allow for their children's youth and natural
vivacity in other words for their lively hopes unabated by time 
unaccompanied by reflection and unchecked by disappointment things
appear to us all in a very different light at our entrance upon
a favourite party or tour when with golden prospects and high
expectations we rise vigorous and fresh like the sun beginning its
morning course from what they do when we sit down at the end of our
views tired and preparing for our journey homeward for then we take
into our reflection what we had left out in prospect the fatigues 
the checks the hazards we had met with and make a true estimate of
pleasures which from our raised expectations must necessarily have
fallen miserably short of what we had promised ourselves at setting out 
nothing but experience can give us a strong and efficacious conviction
of this difference and when we would inculcate the fruits of that upon
the minds of those we love who have not lived long enough to find those
fruits and would hope that our advice should have as much force upon
them as experience has upon us and which perhaps our parents' advice
had not upon ourselves at our daughter' time of life should we not
proceed by patient reasoning and gentleness that we may not harden 
where we would convince for madam the tenderest and most generous
minds when harshly treated become generally the most inflexible if
the young lady knows her heart to be right however defective her
head may be for want of age and experience she will be apt to be very
tenacious and if she believes her friends to be wrong although perhaps
they may be only so in their methods of treating her how much will
every unkind circumstance on the parent's part or heedless one on the
child's though ever so slight in itself widen the difference the
parent's prejudice in disfavour will confirm the daughter's in favour 
of the same person and the best reasonings in the world on either side 
will be attributed to that prejudice in short neither of them will be
convinced a perpetual opposition ensues the parent grows impatient 
the child desperate and as a too natural consequence that falls
out which the mother was most afraid of and which possibly had not
happened if the child's passions had been only led not driven 

my mother was pleased with the whole letter and said it deserved to
have the success it met with but asked me what excuse could be offered
for a young lady capable of making such reflections and who at her time
of life could so well assume the character of one of riper years if she
should rush into any fatal mistake herself 

she then touched upon the moral character of mr lovelace and how
reasonable the aversion of your reflections is to a man who gives
himself the liberties he is said to take and who indeed himself denies
not the accusation having been heard to declare that he will do all
the mischief he can to the sex in revenge for the ill usage and
broken vows of his first love at a time when he was too young  his own
expression it seems  to be insincere 

i replied that i had heard every one say that the lady meant really
used him ill that it affected him so much at the time that he was
forced to travel upon it and to drive her out of his heart ran into
courses which he had ingenuousness enough himself to condemn that 
however he had denied that he had thrown out such menaces against the
sex when charged with them by me in your presence and declared himself
incapable of so unjust and ungenerous a resentment against all for the
perfidy of one 

you remember this my dear as i do your innocent observation upon it 
that you could believe his solemn asseveration and denial for surely 
said you the man who would resent as the highest indignity that could
be offered to a gentleman the imputation of a wilful falsehood would
not be guilty of one 

i insisted upon the extraordinary circumstances in your case 
particularizing them i took notice that mr lovelace's morals were at
one time no objection with your relations for arabella that then much
was built upon his family and more upon his part and learning which
made it out of doubt that he might be reclaimed by a woman of virtue
and prudence and  pray forgive me for mentioning it  i ventured to
add that although your family might be good sort of folks as the world
went yet no body but you imputed to any of them a very punctilious
concern for religion or piety therefore were they the less entitled to
object to defect of that kind in others then what an odious man said
i have they picked out to supplant in a lady's affections one of the
finest figures of a man and one noted for his brilliant parts and
other accomplishments whatever his morals may be 

still my mother insisted that there was the greater merit in your
obedience on that account and urged that there hardly ever was a very
handsome and a very sprightly man who made a tender and affectionate
husband for that they were generally such narcissus's as to imagine
every woman ought to think as highly of them as they did of themselves 

there was no danger from that consideration here i said because the
lady still had greater advantages of person and mind than the man 
graceful and elegant as he must be allowed to be beyond most of his
sex 

she cannot endure to hear me praise any man but her favourite hickman 
upon whom nevertheless she generally brings a degree of contempt which
he would escape did she not lessen the little merit he has by giving
him on all occasions more than i think he can deserve and entering
him into comparisons in which it is impossible but he must be a
sufferer and now  preposterous partiality   she thought for her part 
that mr hickman bating that his face indeed was not so smooth nor his
complexion quite so good and saving that he was not so presuming and
so bold which ought to be no fault with a modest woman equaled mr 
lovelace at any hour of the day 

to avoid entering further into such an incomparable comparison i said 
i did not believe had they left you to your own way and treated you
generously that you would have had the thought of encouraging any man
whom they disliked 

then nancy catching me up the excuse is less for if so must there
not be more of contradiction than love in the case 

not so neither madam for i know miss clarissa harlowe would prefer
mr lovelace to all men if morals 

if nancy that if is every thing do you really think she loves mr 
lovelace 

what would you have had me say my dear i won't tell you what i did
say but had i not said what i did who would have believed me 

besides i know you love him excuse me my dear yet if you deny it 
what do you but reflect upon yourself as if you thought you ought not
to allow yourself in what you cannot help doing 

indeed madam said i the man is worthy of any woman's love  if again 
i could say  but her parents 

her parents nancy  you know my dear how my mother who accuses her
daughter of quickness is evermore interrupting one  

may take wrong measures said i 

cannot do wrong they have reason i'll warrant said she 

by which they may provoke a young woman said i to do rash things 
which otherwise she would not do 

but if it be a rash thing  returned she   should she do it a prudent
daughter will not wilfully err because her parents err if they were to
err if she do the world which blames the parents will not acquit the
child all that can be said in extenuation of a daughter's error in
this case arises from a kind consideration which miss clary's letter
to lady drayton pleads for to be paid to her daughter's youth and
inexperience and will such an admirable young person as miss clarissa
harlowe whose prudence as we see qualifies her to be an advisor of
persons much older than herself take shelter under so poor a covert 

let her know nancy out of hand what i say and i charge you to
represent farther to her that let he dislike one man and approve
of another ever so much it will be expected of a young lady of her
unbounded generosity and greatness of mind that she should deny herself
when she can oblige all her family by so doing no less than ten or a
dozen perhaps the nearest and dearest to her of all the persons in the
world an indulgent father and mother at the head of them it may be
fancy only on her side but parents look deeper and will not miss
clarissa harlowe give up her fancy to her parents' judgment 

i said a great deal upon this judgment subject all that you could wish
i should say and all that your extraordinary case allowed me to say 
and my mother was so sensible of the force of it that she charged me
not to write to you any part of my answer to what she said but only
what she herself had advanced lest in so critical a case it should
induce you to take measures which might give us both reason me for
giving it you for following it to repent it as long as we lived 

and thus my dear have i set my mother's arguments before you and the
rather as i cannot myself tell what to advise you to do you know best
your own heart and what that will let you do 

robin undertakes to deposit this very early that you may have an
opportunity to receive it by your first morning airing 

heaven guide and direct you for the best is the incessant prayer of

your ever affectionate anna howe 




letter xv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sunday afternoon


i am in great apprehension yet cannot help repeating my humble thanks
to your mother and you for your last favour i hope her kind end is
answered by the contents of my last yet i must not think it enough to
acknowledge her goodness to me with a pencil only on the cover of a
letter sealed up a few lines give me leave to write with regard to my
anonymous letter to lady drayton if i did not at that time tell you as
i believe i did that my excellent mrs norton gave me her assistance in
that letter i now acknowledge that she did 

pray let your mother know this for two reasons one that i may not be
thought to arrogate to myself a discretion which does not belong to me 
the other that i may not suffer by the severe but just inference she
was pleased to draw doubling my faults upon me if i myself should act
unworthy of the advice i was supposed to give 

before i come to what most nearly affects us all i must chide you once
more for the severe the very severe things you mention of our family 
to the disparagement of their morals indeed my dear i wonder at
you a slighter occasion might have passed me after i had written to
you so often to so little purpose on this topic but affecting as
my own circumstances are i cannot pass by without animadversion the
reflection i need not repeat in words 

there is not a worthier woman in england than my mother nor is my
father that man you sometimes make him excepting in one point i know
not any family which lives more up to their duty than the principals of
ours a little too uncommunicative for their great circumstances that
is all why then have they not reason to insist upon unexceptionable
morals in a man whose sought-for relationship to them by a marriage
in their family they have certainly a right either to allow of or to
disallow 

another line or two before i am engrossed by my own concerns upon your
treatment of mr hickman is it do you think generous to revenge upon
an innocent person the displeasure you receive from another quarter 
where i doubt you are a trespasser too but one thing i could tell
him and you have best not provoke me to it it is this that no woman
uses ill the man she does not absolutely reject but she has it in her
heart to make him amends when her tyranny has had its run and he
has completed the measure of his services and patience my mind is not
enough at ease to push this matter further 

i will now give you the occasion of my present apprehensions 

i had reason to fear as i mentioned in mine of this morning that a
storm was brewing mr solmes came home from church this afternoon with
my brother soon after betty brought me up a letter without saying
from whom it was in a cover and directed by a hand i never saw before 
as if it were supposed that i would not receive and open it had i known
from whom it came 

these are the contents 


 


to miss clarissa harlowe sunday march 26 

dearest madam 

i think myself a most unhappy man in that i have never yet been able
to pay my respects to you with youre consent for one halfe-hour i
have something to communicat to you that concernes you much if you be
pleased to admit me to youre speech youre honour is concerned in it 
and the honour of all youre familly it relates to the designes of one
whom you are sed to valew more than he desarves and to some of his
reprobat actions which i am reddie to give you convincing proofes of
the truth of i may appear to be interested in it but neverthelesse 
i am reddie to make oathe that every tittle is true and you will
see what a man you are sed to favour but i hope not so for your owne
honour 

pray madam vouchsafe me a hearing as you valew your honour and
familly which will oblidge dearest miss 

your most humble and most faithful servant roger solmes 

i wait below for the hope of admittance 


 


i have no manner of doubt that this is a poor device to get this man
into my company i would have sent down a verbal answer but betty
refused to carry any message which should prohibit his visiting me so
i was obliged either to see him or to write to him i wrote therefore
an answer of which i shall send you the rough draught and now my heart
aches for what may follow from it for i hear a great hurry below 


 


to roger solmes esq 

sir 

whatever you have to communicate to me which concerns my honour may as
well be done by writing as by word of mouth if mr lovelace is any
of my concern i know not that therefore he ought to be yours for the
usage i receive on your account  i must think it so   is so harsh that
were there not such a man in the world as mr lovelace i would not wish
to see mr solmes no not for one half-hour in the way he is pleased
to be desirous to see me i never can be in any danger from mr 
lovelace and of consequence cannot be affected by any of your
discoveries if the proposal i made be accepted you have been
acquainted with it no doubt if not be pleased to let my friends know 
that if they will rid me of my apprehensions of one gentleman i will
rid them of their of another and then of what consequence to them or
to me will it be whether mr lovelace be a good man or a bad and if
not to them nor to me i see not how it can be of any to you but if
you do i have nothing to say to that and it will be a christian part
if you will expostulate with him upon the errors you have discovered 
and endeavour to make him as good a man as no doubt you are yourself 
or you would not be so ready to detect and expose him 

excuse me sir but after my former letter to you and your ungenerous
perseverance and after this attempt to avail yourself at the expense of
another man's character rather than by your own proper merit i see
not that you can blame any asperity in her whom you have so largely
contributed to make unhappy 

cl harlowe 


 


sunday night 

my father was for coming up to me in great wrath it seems but was
persuaded to the contrary my aunt hervey was permitted to send me this
that follow quick work my dear 


to miss clarissa harlowe

niece 

every body is now convinced that nothing is to be done with you by way
of gentleness or persuasion your mother will not permit you to stay in
the house for your father is so incensed by your strange letter to his
friend that she knows not what will be the consequence if you do so 
you are commanded to get ready to go to your uncle antony's out of hand 

your uncle thinks he has not deserved of you such an unwillingness as
you shew to go to his house 

you don't know the wickedness of the man for whose sake you think it
worth while to quarrel with all your friends 

you must not answer me there will be no end of that 

you know not the affliction you give to every body but to none more
than to

your affectionate aunt dorothy hervey 


 


forbid to write to my aunt i took a bolder liberty i wrote a few lines
to my mother beseeching her to procure me leave to throw myself at my
father's feet and hers if i must go nobody else present to beg
pardon for the trouble i had given them both and their blessings and
to receive their commands as to my removal and the time for it from
their own lips 

what new boldness this take it back and bid her learn to obey  was
my mother's angry answer with my letter returned unopened 

but that i might omit nothing that had an appearance of duty i wrote
a few lines to my father himself to the same purpose begging that he
would not turn me out of his house without his blessing but this torn
in two pieces and unopened was brought me up again by betty with an
air one hand held up the other extended the torn letter in her open
palm and a see here what a sad thing is this nothing will do but
duty miss your papa said let her tell me of deeds i'll receive no
words from her and so he tore the letter and flung the pieces at my
head 

so desperate was my case i was resolved not to stop even at this
repulse i took my pen and addressed myself to my uncle harlowe 
enclosing that which my mother had returned unopened and the torn
unopened one sent to my father having first hurried off a transcript
for you 

my uncle was going home and it was delivered to him just as he stepped
into his chariot what may be the fate of it therefore i cannot know
till to-morrow 

the following is a copy of it 


to john harlowe esq 

my dear and ever-honoured uncle 

i have nobody now but you to whom i can apply with hope so much as
to have my humble addresses opened and read my aunt hervey has given me
commands which i want to have explained but she has forbid me writing
to her hereupon i took the liberty to write to my father and mother 
you will see sir by the torn one and by the other both unopened 
what has been the result this sir perhaps you already know but as
you know not the contents of the disgraced letters i beseech you to
read them both that you may be a witness for me that they are not
filled with either complaints or expostulations nor contain any thing
undutiful give me leave to say sir that if deaf-eared anger will
neither grant me a hearing nor what i write a perusal some time hence
the hard-heartedness may be regretted i beseech you dear good sir 
to let me know what is meant by sending me to my uncle antony's house 
rather than to yours or to my aunt hervey's or else-where if it be
for what i apprehend it to be life will not be supportable upon the
terms i beg also to know when i am to be turned out of doors my
heart strongly gives me that if once i am compelled to leave this
house i never shall see it more 

it becomes me however to declare that i write not this through
perverseness or in resentment god knows my heart i do not but the
treatment i apprehend i shall meet with if carried to my other uncle's 
will in all probability give the finishing stroke to the distresses 
the undeserved distresses i will be bold to call them of

your once highly-favoured but now unhappy cl harlowe 




letter xvi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe monday morning march 27 


this morning early my uncle harlowe came hither he sent up the enclosed
very tender letter it has made me wish i could oblige him you will see
how mr solmes's ill qualities are glossed over in it what blemishes
dies affection hide but perhaps they may say to me what faults does
antipathy bring to light 

be pleased to send me back this letter of my uncle by the first return 


sunday night or rather minday morning 

i must answer you though against my own resolution every body loves
you and you know they do the very ground you walk upon is dear to most
of us but how can we resolve to see you there is no standing against
your looks and language it is our loves makes us decline to see you 
how can we when you are resolved not to do what we are resolved you
shall do i never for my part loved any creature as i loved you from
your infancy till now and indeed as i have often said never was there
a young creature so deserving of our love but what is come to you now 
alas alas my dear kinswoman how you fail in the trial 

i have read the letters you enclosed at a proper time i may shew them
to my brother and sister but they will receive nothing from you at
present 

for my part i could not read your letter to me without being unmanned 
how can you be so unmoved yourself yet so able to move every body
else how could you send such a letter to mr solmes fie upon you how
strangely are you altered 

then to treat your brother and sister as you did that they don't care
to write to you or to see you don't you know where it is written that
soft answers turn away wrath but if you will trust to you sharp-pointed
wit you may wound yet a club will beat down a sword and how can you
expect that they who are hurt by you will not hurt you again was this
the way you used to take to make us all adore you as we did no it
was your gentleness of heart and manners that made every body even
strangers at first sight treat you as a lady and call you a lady 
though not born one while your elder sister had no such distinctions
paid her if you were envied why should you sharpen envy and file up
its teeth to an edge you see i write like an impartial man and as one
that loves you still 

but since you have displayed your talents and spared nobody and moved
every body without being moved you have but made us stand the closer
and firmer together this is what i likened to an embattled phalanx 
once before your aunt hervey forbids your writing for the same reason
that i must not countenance it we are all afraid to see you because we
know we shall be made as so many fools nay your mother is so afraid
of you that once or twice when she thought you were coming to force
yourself into her presence she shut the door and locked herself in 
because she knew she must not see you upon your terms and you are
resolved you will not see her upon hers 

resolves but to oblige us all my dearest miss clary and you shall see
how we will clasp you every one by turns to our rejoicing hearts if the
one man has not the wit and the parts and the person of the other no
one breathing has a worse heart than that other and is not the love
of all your friends and a sober man if he be not so polished to be
preferred to a debauchee though ever so fine a man to look at you have
such talents that you will be adored by the one but the other has as
much advantage in those respects as you have yourself and will not set
by them one straw for husbands are sometimes jealous of their authority
with witty wives you will have in one a man of virtue had you not
been so rudely affronting to him he would have made your ears tingle
with what he could have told you of the other 

come my dear niece let me have the honour of doing with you what no
body else yet has been able to do your father mother and i will
divide the pleasure and the honour i will again call it between us 
and all past offences shall be forgiven and mr solmes we will engage 
shall take nothing amiss hereafter of what has passed 

he knows he says what a jewel that man will have who can obtain your
favour and he will think light of all he has suffered or shall suffer 
in obtaining you 

dear sweet creature oblige us and oblige us with a grace it must be
done whether with a grace or not i do assure you it must you must not
conquer father mother uncles every body depend upon that 

i have set up half the night to write this you do not know how i
am touched at reading yours and writing this yet will i be at
harlowe-place early in the morning so upon reading this if you will
oblige us all send me word to come up to your apartment and i will
lead you down and present you to the embraces of every one and you
will then see you have more of a brother and sister in them both than
of late your prejudices will let you think you have this from one who
used to love to style himself 

your paternal uncle john harlowe 


 


in about an hour after this kind letter was given me my uncle sent up
to know if he should be a welcome visiter upon the terms mentioned in
his letter he bid betty bring him down a verbal answer a written one 
he said would be a bad sign and he bid her therefore not to bring a
letter but i had just finished the enclosed transcription of one i had
been writing she made a difficulty to carry it but was prevailed upon
to oblige me by a token which these mrs betty's cannot withstand 


dear and honoured sir 

how you rejoice me by your condescending goodness so kind so paternal
a letter so soothing to a wounded heart and of late what i have been
so little used to how am i affected with it tell me not dear sir of
my way of writing your letter has more moved me than i have been able
to move any body it has made me wish with all my heart that i could
entitle myself to be visited upon your own terms and to be led down to
my father and mother by so good and so kind an uncle 

i will tell you dearest uncle what i will do to make my peace i have
no doubt that mr solmes upon consideration would greatly prefer my
sister to such a strange averse creature as me his chief or one of his
chief motives in his address to me is as i have reason to believe the
contiguity of my grandfather's estate to his own i will resign it for
ever i will resign it and the resignation must be good because i will
never marry at all i will make it over to my sister and her heirs for
ever i shall have no heirs but my brother and her and i will receive 
as of my father's bounty such an annuity not in lieu of the estate 
but as of his bounty as he shall be pleased to grant me if it be
ever so small and whenever i disoblige him he to withdraw it at his
pleasure 

will this not be accepted surely it must surely it will i beg of
you dearest sir to propose it and second it with your interest this
will answer every end my sister has a high opinion of mr solmes i
never can have any in the light he is proposed to me but as my sister's
husband he will be always entitled to my respect and shall have it 

if this be accepted grant me sir the honour of a visit and do me
then the inexpressible pleasure of leading me down to the feet of my
honoured parents and they shall find me the most dutiful of children 
and to the arms of my brother and sister and they shall find me the
most obliging and most affectionate of sisters 

i wait sir for your answer to this proposal made with the whole heart
of

your dutiful and most obliged niece cl harlowe 


monday noon 

i hope this will be accepted for betty tells me that my uncle antony
and my aunt hervey are sent for and not mr solmes which i look upon
as a favourable circumstance with what cheerfulness will i assign over
this envied estate what a much more valuable consideration shall i
part with it for the love and favour of all my relations that love
and favour which i used for eighteen years together to rejoice in and
be distinguished by and what a charming pretence will this afford me
of breaking with mr lovelace and how easily will it possibly make him
to part with me 

i found this morning in the usual place a letter from him in answer 
i suppose to mine of friday which i deposited not till saturday but
i have not opened it nor will i till i see what effect this new offer
will have 

let me but be permitted to avoid the man i hate and i will give up with
cheerfulness the man i could prefer to renounce the one were i really
to value him as much as you seem to imagine can give but a temporary
concern which time and discretion will alleviate this is a sacrifice
which a child owes to parents and friends if they insist upon its being
made but the other to marry a man one cannot endure is not only a
dishonest thing as to the man but it is enough to make a creature who
wishes to be a good wife a bad or indifferent one as i once wrote to
the man himself and then she can hardly be either a good mistress or
a good friend or any thing but a discredit to her family and a bad
example to all around her 

methinks i am loth in the suspense i am in at present to deposit
this because it will be leaving you in one as great but having been
prevented by betty's officiousness twice i will now go down to my
little poultry and if i have an opportunity will leave it in the
usual place where i hope to find something from you 




letter xvii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe monday afternoon march 27 


i have deposited my narrative down to this day noon but i hope soon to
follow it with another letter that i may keep you as little a while as
possible in that suspense which i am so much affected by at this moment 
for my heart is disturbed at ever foot i hear stir and at every door
below that i hear open or shut 

they have been all assembled some time and are in close debate i
believe but can there be room for long debate upon a proposal which 
if accepted will so effectually answer all their views can they
insist a moment longer upon my having mr solmes when they see what
sacrifices i am ready to make to be freed from his addresses oh but
i suppose the struggle is first with bella's nicety to persuade her
to accept of the estate and of the husband and next with her pride 
to take her sister's refusals as she once phrased it or it may
be my brother is insisting upon equivalents for his reversion in the
estate and these sort of things take up but too much the attention of
some of our family to these no doubt one or both it must be owing 
that my proposal admits of so much consideration 

i want methinks to see what mr lovelace in his letter says but i
will deny myself this piece of curiosity till that which is raised by my
present suspense is answered excuse me my dear that i thus trouble
you with my uncertainties but i have no employment nor heart if i
had to pursue any other but what my pen affords me 


monday evening 

would you believe it betty by anticipation tells me that i am to be
refused i am a vile artful creature every body is too good to me 
my uncle harlowe has been taken in that's the phrase they know how
it would be if he either wrote to me or saw me he has however been
made ashamed to be so wrought upon a pretty thing truly in the eye of
the world it would be were they to take me at my word it would look
as if they had treated me thus hardly as i think it for this very
purpose my peculiars particularly miss howe would give it that
turn and i myself could mean nothing by it but to see if it would be
accepted in order to strengthen my own arguments against mr solmes it
was amazing that it could admit of a moment's deliberation that any
thing could be supposed to be done in it it was equally against law and
equity and a fine security miss bella would have or mr solmes when i
could resume it when i would my brother and she my heirs o the artful
creature i to resolve to live single when lovelace is so sure of
me and every where declares as much and can whenever he pleases 
if my husband claim under the will then the insolence the
confidence  as betty mincingly told me that one said you may easily
guess who  that she who was so justly in disgrace for downright
rebellion should pretend to prescribe to the whole family should name
a husband for her elder sister what a triumph would her obstinacy go
away with to delegate her commands not as from a prison as she called
it but as from her throne to her elders and betters and to her father
and mother too amazing perfectly amazing that any body could argue
upon such a proposal as this it was a master-stroke of finesse it was
me in perfection surely my uncle harlowe will never again be so taken
in 

all this was the readier told me because it was against me and would
tease and vex me but as some of this fine recapitulation implied that
somebody spoke up for me i was curious to know who it was but betty
would not tell me for fear i should have the consolation to find that
all were not against me 

but do you not see my dear what a sad creature she is whom you honour
with your friendship you could not doubt your influence over me why
did you not take the friendly liberty i have always taken with you 
and tell me my faults and what a specious hypocrite i am for if my
brother and sister could make such discoveries how is it possible that
faults to enormous  you could see others you thought of a more secret
nature   could escape you penetrating eye 

well but now it seems they are debating how and by whom to answer me 
for they know not nor are they to know that mrs betty has told me all
these fine things one desires to be excused it seems another chooses
not to have any thing to say to me another has enough of me and of
writing to so ready a scribbler there will be no end 

thus are those imputed qualifications which used so lately to gain me
applause now become my crimes so much do disgust and anger alter the
property of things 

the result of their debate i suppose will somehow or other be
communicated to me by-and-by but let me tell you my dear that i am
made so desperate that i am afraid to open mr lovelace's letter 
lest in the humour i am in i should do something if i find it not
exceptionable that may give me repentance as long as i live 


monday night 

this moment the following letter is brought me by betty 


monday 5 o'clock

miss cunning-one 

your fine new proposal is thought unworthy of a particular answer your
uncle harlowe is ashamed to be so taken in have you no new fetch for
your uncle antony go round with us child now your hand's in but i
was bid to write only one line that you might not complain as you
did of your worthy sister for the freedoms you provoked it is
this prepare yourself to-morrow you go to my uncle antony's that's
all child 

james harlowe 


i was vexed to the heart at this and immediately in the warmth of
resentment wrote the enclosed to my uncle harlowe who it seems stays
here this night 


to john harlowe esq monday night 

honoured sir 

i find i am a very sad creature and did not know it i wrote not to my
brother to you sir i wrote from you i hope the honour of an answer 
no one reveres her uncle more than i do nevertheless between uncle and
niece excludes not such a hope and i think i have not made a proposal
that deserves to be treated with scorn 

forgive me sir my heart is full perhaps one day you may think you
have been prevailed upon for that is plainly the case to join to
treat me as i do not deserve to be treated if you are ashamed as my
brother hints of having expressed any returning tenderness to me god
help me i see i have no mercy to expect from any body but sir from
your pen let me have an answer i humbly implore it of you till my
brother can recollect what belongs to a sister i will not take from him
no answer to the letter i wrote to you nor any commands whatever 

i move every body this sir is what you are pleased to mention but
whom have i moved one person in the family has more moving ways than i
have or he could never so undeservedly have made every body ashamed to
show tenderness to a poor distressed child of the same family 

return me not this with contempt or torn or unanswered i beseech you 
my father has a title to do that or any thing by his child but from no
other person in the world of your sex sir ought a young creature of
mine while she preserves a supplicating spirit to be so treated 

when what i have before written in the humblest strain has met with such
strange constructions i am afraid that this unguarded scrawl will be
very ill received but i beg sir you will oblige me with one line be
it ever so harsh in answer to my proposal i still think it ought to
be attended to i will enter into the most solemn engagements to make it
valid by a perpetual single life in a word any thing i can do i will
do to be restored to all your favours more i cannot say but that i
am very undeservedly 

a most unhappy creature 


betty scrupled again to carry this letter and said she should have
anger and i should have it returned in scraps and bits 

i must take that chance said i i only desire that you will deliver it
as directed 

sad doings very sad she said that young ladies should so violently
set themselves against their duty 

i told her she should have the liberty to say what she pleased so she
would but be my messenger that one time and down she went with it 

i bid her if she could slide it into my uncle's hand unseen at least
unseen by my brother or sister for fear it should meet through their
good office with the fate she had bespoken for it 

she would not undertake for that she said 

i am now in expectation of the result but having so little ground to
hope for their favour or mercy i opened mr lovelace's letter 

i would send it to you my dear as well as those i shall enclose by
this conveyance but not being able at present to determine in what
manner i shall answer it i will give myself the trouble of abstracting
it here while i am waiting for what may offer from the letter just
carried down 

he laments as usual my ill opinion of him and readiness to believe
every thing to his disadvantage he puts into plain english as i
supposed he would my hint that i might be happier if by any rashness
he might be guilty of to solmes he should come to an untimely end
himself 

he is concerned he says that the violence he had expressed on his
extreme apprehensiveness of losing me should have made him guilty of
any thing i had so much reason to resent 

he owns that he is passionate all good-natured men he says are so 
and a sincere man cannot hide it  but appeals to me whether if any
occasion in the world could excuse the rashness of his expressions it
would not be his present dreadful situation through my indifference 
and the malice of his enemies 

he says he has more reason than ever from the contents of my last 
to apprehend that i shall be prevailed upon by force if not by fair
means to fall in with my brother's measures and sees but too plainly 
that i am preparing him to expect it 

upon this presumption he supplicates with the utmost earnestness 
that i will not give way to the malice of his enemies 

solemn vows of reformation and everlasting truth and obligingness 
he makes all in the style of desponding humility yet calls it a cruel
turn upon him to impute his protestations to a consciousness of the
necessity there is for making them from his bad character 

he despises himself he solemnly protests for his past follies he
thanks god he has seen his error and nothing but my more particular
instructions is wanting to perfect his reformation 

he promises that he will do every thing that i shall think he can do
with honour to bring about a reconciliation with my father and even
will if i insist upon it make the first overtures to my brother and
treat him as his own brother because he is mine if he will not by new
affronts revive the remembrance of the past 

he begs in the most earnest and humble manner for one half-hour's
interview undertaking by a key which he owns he has to the
garden-door leading into the coppice as we call it if i will but
unbolt the door to come into the garden at night and wait till i have
an opportunity to come to him that he may re-assure me of the truth of
all he writes and of the affection and if needful protection of all
his family 

he presumes not he says to write by way of menace to me but if i
refuse him this favour he knows not so desperate have some strokes in
my letter made him what his despair may make him do 

he asks me determined as my friends are and far as they have already
gone and declare they will go what can i propose to do to avoid
having mr solmes if i am carried to my uncle antony's unless i
resolve to accept of the protection he has offered to procure me or
except i will escape to london or elsewhere while i can escape 

he advises me to sue to your mother for her private reception of
me only till i can obtain possession of my own estate and procure my
friends to be reconciled to me which he is sure they will be desirous
to be the moment i am out of their power 

he apprizes me  it is still my wonder how he comes by this
intelligence   that my friends have written to my cousin morden to
represent matters to him in their own partial way nor doubt they to
influence him on their side of the question 

that all this shews i have but one way if none of my friends or
intimates will receive me 

if i will transport him with the honour of my choice of this one way 
settlements shall be drawn with proper blanks which i shall fill up as
i pleased let him but have my commands from my own mouth all my doubts
and scruples from my own lips and only a repetition that i will not 
on any consideration be solmes's wife and he shall be easy but after
such a letter as i have written nothing but an interview can make him
so  he beseeches me therefore to unbolt the door as that very night 
or if i receive not this time enough this night and he will in a
disguise that shall not give suspicion who he is if he should be seen 
come to the garden door in hopes to open it with his key nor will he
have any other lodging than in the coppice both nights watching every
wakeful hour for the propitious unbolting unless he has a letter with
my orders to the contrary or to make some other appointment 

this letter was dated yesterday so he was there last night i suppose 
and will be there this night and i have not written a line to him and
now it is too late were i determined what to write 

i hope he will not go to mr solmes i hope he will not come
hither if he do either i will break with him for ever 

what have i to do with these headstrong spirits i wish i had never but
what signifies wishing i am strangely perplexed but i need not have
told you this after such a representation of my situation 




letter xvii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe tuesday morning 7 o'clock

my uncle has vouchsafed to answer me these that follow are the
contents of his letter but just now brought me although written last
night late i suppose 


monday night 

miss clary 

since you are grown such a bold challenger and teach us all our duty 
though you will not practise your own i must answer you nobody
wants you estate from you are you who refuse ever body's advice 
to prescribe a husband to your sister your letter to mr solmes is
inexcusable i blamed you for it before your parents will be obeyed it
is fit they should your mother has nevertheless prevailed to have your
going to your uncle antony's put off till thursday yet owns you deserve
not that or any other favour from her i will receive no more of
your letters you are too artful for me you are an ungrateful and
unreasonable child must you have your way paramount to every body's 
how are you altered 

your displeased uncle john harlowe 


 


to be carried away on thursday to the moated house to the chapel to
solmes how can i think of this they will make me desperate 


tuesday morning 8 o'clock 

i have another letter from mr lovelace i opened it with the
expectation of its being filled with bold and free complaints on my
not writing to prevent his two nights watching in weather not extremely
agreeable but instead of complaints he is full of tender concern
lest i may have been prevented by indisposition or by the closer
confinement which he has frequently cautioned me that i may expect 

he says he had been in different disguises loitering about our garden
and park wall all the day on sunday last and all sunday night was
wandering about the coppice and near the back door it rained and he
has got a great cold attended with feverishness and so hoarse that he
has almost lost his voice 

why did he not flame out in his letter treated as i am treated by my
friends it is dangerous to be laid under the sense of an obligation to
an addresser's patience especially when such a one suffers in health
for my sake 

he had no shelter he says but under the great overgrown ivy which
spreads wildly round the heads of two or three oaklings and that was
soon wet through 

you remember the spot you and i my dear once thought ourselves
obliged to the natural shade which those ivy-covered oaklings afforded
us in a sultry day 

i can't help saying i am sorry he has suffered for my sake but tis
his own seeking 

his letter is dated last night at eight and indisposed as he is 
he tells me that he will watch till ten in hopes of my giving him the
meeting he so earnestly request and after that he has a mile to walk
to his horse and servant and four miles then to ride to his inn 

he owns that he has an intelligencer in our family who has failed
him for a day or two past and not knowing how i do or how i may be
treated his anxiety is increased 

this circumstance gives me to guess who this intelligencer is joseph
leman the very creature employed and confided in more than any other 
by my brother 

this is not an honourable way of proceeding in mr lovelace did
he learn this infamous practice of corrupting the servants of other
families at the french court where he resided a good while 

i have been often jealous of this leman in my little airings and
poultry-visits doubly obsequious as he was always to me i have
thought him my brother's spy upon me and although he obliged me by
his hastening out of the garden and poultry-yard whenever i came into
either have wondered that from his reports my liberties of those kinds
have not been abridged so possibly this man may be bribed by both 
yet betray both worthy views want not such obliquities as these on
either side an honest mind must rise into indignation both at the
traitor-maker and the traitor 


 mr lovelace accounts for this vol i letter xxxv 


he presses with the utmost earnestness for an interview he would not
presume he says to disobey my last personal commands that he should
not endeavour to attend me again in the wood-house but says he can
give me such reasons for my permitting him to wait upon my father
or uncles as he hopes will be approved by me for he cannot help
observing that it is no more suitable to my own spirit than to his 
that he a man of fortune and family should be obliged to pursue such a
clandestine address as would only become a vile fortune-hunter but if
i will give my consent for his visiting me like a man and a gentleman 
no ill treatment shall provoke him to forfeit his temper 

lord m will accompany him if i please or lady betty lawrance will
first make the visit to my mother or to my aunt hervey or even to my
uncles if i choose it and such terms shall be offered as shall have
weight upon them 

he begs that i will not deny him making a visit to mr solmes by
all that's good he vows that it shall not be with the least intention
either to hurt or affront him but only to set before him calmly and
rationally the consequences that may possibly flow from so fruitless a
perseverance as well as the ungenerous folly of it to a mind as noble
as mine he repeats his own resolution to attend my pleasure and mr 
morden's arrival and advice for the reward of his own patience 

it is impossible he says but one of these methods must do 
presence he observes even of a disliked person takes off the edge of
resentments which absence whets and makes keen 

he therefore most earnestly repeats his importunities for the
supplicated interview  he says he has business of consequence in
london but cannot stir from the inconvenient spot where he has for
some time resided in disguises unworthy of himself until he can be
absolutely certain that i shall not be prevailed upon either by force
or otherwise and until he finds me delivered from the insults of my
brother nor ought this to be an indifferent point to one for whose
sake all the world reports me to be used unworthily but one remark he
says he cannot help making that did my friends know the little favour
i shew him and the very great distance i keep him at they would
have no reason to confine me on his account and another that they
themselves seem to think him entitled to a different usage and expect
that he receives it when in truth what he meets with from me is
exactly what they wish him to meet with excepting in the favour of
my correspondence i honour him with upon which he says he puts the
highest value and for the sake of which he has submitted to a thousand
indignities 

he renews his professions of reformation he is convinced he says 
that he has already run a long and dangerous course and that it is high
time to think of returning it must be from proper conviction he says 
that a person who has lived too gay a life resolves to reclaim before
age or sufferings come upon him 

all generous spirits he observes hate compulsion upon this
observation he dwells but regrets that he is likely to owe all his
hopes to this compulsion this injudicious compulsion he justly calls
it and none to my esteem for him although he presumes upon some
merit in this implicit regard to my will in the bearing the daily
indignities offered not only to him but to his relations by my
brother in the nightly watchings his present indisposition makes him
mention or he had not debased the nobleness of his passion for me by
such a selfish instance 

i cannot but say i am sorry the man is not well 

i am afraid to ask you my dear what you would have done thus
situated but what i have done i have done in a word i wrote that
i would if possible give him a meeting to-morrow night between the
hours of nine and twelve by the ivy summer-house or in it or near the
great cascade at the bottom of the garden and would unbolt the door 
that he might come in by his own key but that if i found the meeting
impracticable or should change my mind i would signify as much by
another line which he must wait for until it were dark 


tuesday eleven o'clock 

i am just returned from depositing my billet how diligent is this man 
it is plain he was in waiting for i had walked but a few paces after i
had deposited it when my heart misgiving me i returned to have taken
it back in order to reconsider it as i walked and whether i should or
should not let it go but i found it gone 

in all probability there was but a brick wall of a few inches thick 
between mr lovelace and me at the very time i put the letter under the
brick 

i am come back dissatisfied with myself but i think my dear there
can be no harm in meeting him if i do not he may take some violent
measures what he knows of the treatment i meet with in malice to him 
and with the view to frustrate all his hopes may make him desperate 
his behaviour last time i saw him under the disadvantages of time and
place and surprised as i was gives me no apprehension of any thing but
discovery what he requires is not unreasonable and cannot affect my
future choice and determination it is only to assure him from my own
lips that i never will be the wife of a man i hate if i have not an
opportunity to meet without hazard or detection he must once more
bear the disappointment all his trouble and mine too is owing to his
faulty character this although i hate tyranny and arrogance in all
shapes makes me think less of the risques he runs and the fatigues he
undergoes than otherwise i should do and still less as my sufferings
 derived from the same source are greater than his 

betty confirms this intimation that i must go to my uncle's on
thursday she was sent on purpose to direct me to prepare myself for
going and to help me to get every thing up in order for my removal 




letter xix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday three o'clock march 28 


i have mentioned several times the pertness of mrs betty to me 
and now having a little time upon my hands i will give you a short
dialogue that passed just now between us it may perhaps be a little
relief to you from the dull subjects with which i am perpetually teasing
you 

as she attended me at dinner she took notice that nature is satisfied
with a very little nourishment and thus she complimentally proved
it for miss said she you eat nothing yet never looked more
charmingly in your life 

as to the former part of your speech betty said i you observe well 
and i have often thought when i have seen how healthy the children of
the labouring poor look and are with empty stomachs and hardly a good
meal in a week that god almighty is very kind to his creatures in this
respect as well as in all others in making much not necessary to the
support of life when three parts in four of his creatures if it were 
would not know how to obtain it it puts me in mind of two proverbial
sentences which are full of admirable meaning 

what pray miss are they i love to hear you talk when you are so
sedate as you seem now to be 

the one is to the purpose we are speaking of poverty is the mother of
health and let me tell you betty if i had a better appetite and
were to encourage it with so little rest and so much distress and
persecution i don't think i should be able to preserve my reason 

there's no inconvenience but has its convenience said betty giving me
proverb for proverb but what is the other madam 

that the pleasures of the mighty are not obtained by the tears of the
poor it is but reasonable therefore methinks that the plenty of
the one should be followed by distempers and that the indigence of the
other should be attended with that health which makes all its other
discomforts light on the comparison and hence a third proverb betty 
since you are an admirer of proverbs better a hare-foot than none at
all that is to say than not to be able to walk 

she was mightily taken with what i said see returned she what a fine
thing scholarship is i said she had always from a girl a taste for
reading though it were but in mother goose and concerning the fairies
 and then she took genteelly a pinch of snuff  could but my parents
have let go as fast as i pulled i should have been a very happy
creature 

very likely you would have made great improvements betty but as it
is i cannot say but since i had the favour of your attendance in this
intimate manner i have heard smarter things from you than i have heard
at table from some of my brother's fellow-collegians 

your servant dear miss dropping me one of her best courtesies so
fine a judge as you are it is enough to make one very proud then with
another pinch i cannot indeed but say bridling upon it that i have
heard famous scholars often and often say very silly things things
i should be ashamed myself to say but i thought they did it out of
humility and in condescension to those who had not their learning 

that she might not be too proud i told her i would observe that the
liveliness or quickness she so happily discovered in herself was not
so much an honour to her as what she owed to her sex which as i had
observed in many instances had great advantages over the other in all
the powers that related to imagination and hence mrs betty you'll
take notice as i have of late had opportunity to do that your own
talent at repartee and smartness when it has something to work upon 
displays itself to more advantage than could well be expected from one
whose friends to speak in your own phrase could not let go so fast as
you pulled 

the wench gave me a proof of the truth of my observation in a manner
still more alert than i had expected if said she our sex had so much
advantage in smartness it is the less to be wondered at that you 
miss who have had such an education should outdo all the men and women
too that come near you 

bless me betty said i what a proof do you give me of your wit and
your courage at the same time this is outdoing yourself it would make
young ladies less proud and more apprehensive were they generally
attended by such smart servants and their mouths permitted to be
unlocked upon them as yours has been lately upon me but take away 
mrs betty 

why miss you have eat nothing at all i hope you are not displeased
with your dinner for any thing i have said 

no mrs betty i am pretty well used to your freedoms now you know i
am not displeased in the main to observe that were the succession of
modern fine ladies to be extinct it might be supplied from those whom
they place in the next rank to themselves their chamber-maids and
confidants your young mistress has contributed a great deal to this
quickness of yours she always preferred your company to mine as
you pulled she let go and so mrs betty you have gained by her
conversation what i have lost 

why miss if you come to that nobody says better things than miss
harlowe i could tell you one if i pleased upon my observing to her 
that you lived of late upon the air and had no stomach to any thing 
yet looked as charmingly as ever 

i dare say it was a very good-natured one mrs betty do you then
please that i shall hear it 

only this miss that your stomachfulness had swallowed up your stomach 
and that obstinacy was meat drink and clothes to you 

ay mrs betty and did she say this i hope she laughed when she said
it as she does at all her good things as she calls them it was very
smart and very witty i wish my mind were so much at ease as to aim at
being witty too but if you admire such sententious sayings i'll help
you to another and that is encouragement and approbation make people
show talents they were never suspected to have and this will do both
for mistress and maid and another i'll furnish you with the
contrary of the former that will do only for me that persecution and
discouragement depress ingenuous minds and blunt the edge of lively
imaginations and hence may my sister's brilliancy and my stupidity be
both accounted for ingenuous you must know mrs betty and ingenious 
are two things and i would not arrogate the latter to myself 

lord miss said the foolish girl you know a great deal for your
years you are a very learned young lady what pity 

none of your pitties mrs betty i know what you'd say but tell me if
you can is it resolved that i shall be carried to my uncle antony's on
thursday 

i was willing to reward myself for the patience she had made me
exercise by getting at what intelligence i could from her 

why miss seating herself at a little distance excuse my sitting down 
with the snuff-box tapped very smartly the lid opened and a
pinch taken with a dainty finger and thumb the other three fingers
distendedly bent and with a fine flourish i cannot but say that it is
my opinion you will certainly go on thursday and this noless foless 
as i have heard my young lady say in french 

whether i am willing or not willing you mean i suppose mrs betty 

you have it miss 

well but betty i have no mind to be turned out of doors so suddenly 
do you think i could not be permitted to tarry one week longer 

how can i tell miss 

o mrs betty you can tell a great deal if you please but here i am
forbid writing to any one of my family none of it now will come near
me nor will any of it permit me to see them how shall i do to make
known my request to stay here a week or fortnight longer 

why miss i fancy if you were to shew a compliable temper your
friends would shew a compliable one too but would you expect favours 
and grant none 

smartly put betty but who knows what may be the result of my being
carried to my uncle antony's 

who knows miss why any body will guess what may be the result 

as how betty 

as how repeated the pert wench why miss you will stand in your own
light as you have hitherto done and your parents as such good parents
ought will be obeyed 

if mrs betty i had not been used to your oughts and to have my duty
laid down to me by your oraculous wisdom i should be apt to stare at the
liberty of you speech 

you seem angry miss i hope i take no unbecoming liberty 

if thou really thinkest thou dost not thy ignorance is more to be
pitied than thy pertness resented i wish thou wouldst leave me to
myself 

when young ladies fall out with their own duty it is not much to be
wondered at that they are angry at any body who do theirs 

that's a very pretty saying mrs betty i see plainly what thy duty is
in thy notion and am obliged to those who taught it thee 

every body takes notice miss that you can say very cutting words in a
cool manner and yet not call names as i have known some gentlefolks
as well as others do when in a passion but i wish you had permitted
squire solmes to see you he would have told you such stories of
squire lovelace as you would have turned your heart against him for
ever 

and know you any of the particulars of those sad stories 

indeed i don't but you'll hear all at your uncle antony's i suppose 
and a great deal more perhaps than you will like to hear 

let me hear what i will i am determined against mr solmes were it to
cost me my life 

if you are miss the lord have mercy on you for what with this letter
of yours to squire solmes whom they so much value and what with
their antipathy to squire lovelace whom they hate they will have no
patience with you 

what will they do betty they won't kill me what will they do 

kill you no but you will not be suffered to stir from thence till
you have complied with your duty and no pen and ink will be allowed you
as here where they are of opinion you make no good use of it nor would
it be allowed here only as they intend so soon to send you away to your
uncle's no-body will be permitted to see you or to correspond with
you what farther will be done i can't say and if i could it may not
be proper but you may prevent all by one word and i wish you would 
miss all then would be easy and happy and if i may speak my mind i
see not why one man is not as good as another why especially a sober
man is not as good as a rake 

well betty said i sighing all thy impertinence goes for nothing but
i see i am destined to be a very unhappy creature yet i will venture
upon one request more to them 

and so quite sick of the pert creature and of myself i retired to my
closet and wrote a few lines to my uncle harlowe notwithstanding his
prohibition in order to get a reprieve from being carried away so soon
as thursday next if i must go and this that i might if complied
with suspend the appointment i have made with mr lovelace for my
heart misgives me as to meeting him and that more and more i know not
why under the superscription of the letter i wrote these words pray 
dear sir be pleased to give this a reading 

this is a copy of what i wrote 


tuesday afternoon 

honoured sir 

let me this once be heard with patience and have my petition granted 
it is only that i may not be hurried away so soon as next thursday 

why should the poor girl be turned out of doors so suddenly so
disgracefully procure for me sir one fortnight's respite in that
space of time i hope you will all relent my mamma shall not need to
shut her door in apprehension of seeing her disgraceful child i will
not presume to think of entering her presence or my papa's without
leave one fortnight's respite is but a small favour for them to grant 
except i am to be refused every thing i ask but it is of the highest
import to my peace of mind procure it for me therefore dearest sir 
and you will exceedingly oblige

your dutiful though greatly afflicted niece cl harlowe 


i sent this down my uncle was not gone and he now stays to know the
result of the question put to me in the enclosed answer which he has
given to mind 


your going to your uncle's was absolutely concluded upon for next
thursday nevertheless your mother seconded by mr solmes pleaded
so strongly to have you indulged that your request for a delay will
be complied with upon one condition and whether for a fortnight or
a shorter time that will depend upon yourself if you refuse the
condition your mother declares she will give over all further
intercession for you nor do you deserve this favour as you put it
upon our yielding to you not you to us 

this condition is that you admit of a visit from mr solmes for one
hour in company of your brother your sister or your uncle antony 
choose who you will 

if you comply not go next thursday to a house which is become strangely
odious to you of late whether you get ready to go or not answer
therefore directly to the point no evasion name your day and hour mr 
solmes will neither eat you nor drink you let us see whether we are
to be complied with in any thing or not 

john harlowe 


 


after a very little deliberation i resolved to comply with this
condition all i fear is that mr lovelace's intelligencer may inform
him of it and that his apprehensions upon it may make him take some
desperate resolution especially as now having more time given me here 
i think to write to him to suspend the interview he is possibly so sure
of i sent down the following to my uncle 


honoured sir 

although i see not what end the proposed condition can answer i comply
with it i wish i could with every thing expected of me if i must name
one in whose company i am to see the gentleman and that one not my
mamma whose presence i could wish to be honoured by on the occasion 
let my uncle if he pleases be the person if i must name the day a
long day i doubt will not be permitted me let it be next tuesday 

the hour four in the afternoon the place either the ivy summer-house 
or in the little parlour i used to be permitted to call mine 

be pleased sir nevertheless to prevail upon my mamma to vouchsafe me
her presence on the occasion 

i am sir your ever-dutiful cl harlowe 


a reply is just sent me i thought it became my averseness to this
meeting to name a distant day but i did not expect they would have
complied with it so here is one week gained 

this is the reply 


you have done well to comply we are willing to think the best of every
slight instance of duty from you yet have you seemed to consider the
day as an evil day and so put if far off this nevertheless is granted
you as no time need to be lost if you are as generous after the day 
as we are condescending before it let me advise you not to harden your
mind nor take up your resolution beforehand mr solmes has more awe 
and even terror at the thought of seeing you than you can have at the
thoughts of seeing him his motive is love let not yours be hatred my
brother antony will be present in hopes you will deserve well of him 
by behaving well to the friend of the family see you use him as such 
your mother had permission to be there if she thought fit but says 
she would not for a thousand pound unless you would encourage her
beforehand as she wishes to be encouraged one hint i am to give you
mean time it is this to make a discreet use of your pen and ink 
methinks a young creature of niceness should be less ready to write to
one man when she is designed to be another's 

this compliance i hope will produce greater and then the peace of the
family will be restored which is what is heartily wished by

your loving uncle john harlowe 

unless it be to the purpose our hearts are set upon you need not write
again 


 


this man have more terror at seeing me than i can have at seeing
him how can that be if he had half as much he would not wish to see
me his motive love yes indeed love of himself he knows no other 
for love that deserves the name seeks the satisfaction of the beloved
object more than its own weighed in this scale what a profanation is
this man guilty of 

not to take up my resolution beforehand that advice comes too late 

but i must make a discreet use of my pen that i doubt as they have
managed it in the sense they mean it is as much out of my power as
the other 

but write to one man when i am designed for another what a shocking
expression is that 

repenting of my appointment with mr lovelace before i had this favour
granted me you may believe i hesitated not a moment to revoke it now
that i had gained such a respite accordingly i wrote that i found
it inconvenient to meet him as i had intended that the risque i should
run of a discovery and the mischiefs that might flow from it could not
be justified by any end that such a meeting could answer that i found
one certain servant more in my way when i took my morning and evening
airings than any other that the person who might reveal the secrets
of a family to him might if opportunity were given him betray me or
him to those whom it was his duty to serve that i had not been used to
a conduct so faulty as to lay myself at the mercy of servants and was
sorry he had measures to pursue that made steps necessary in his own
opinion which in mine were very culpable and which no end could
justify that things drawing towards a crisis between my friends and me 
an interview could avail nothing especially as the method by which this
correspondence was carried on was not suspected and he could write all
that was in his mind to write that i expected to be at liberty to judge
of what was proper and fit upon this occasion especially as he might be
assured that i would sooner choose death than mr solmes 


tuesday night 

i have deposited my letter to mr lovelace threatening as things look
against me i am much better pleased with myself for declining the
interview than i was before i suppose he will be a little out of humour
upon it however but as i reserved to myself the liberty of changing my
mind and as it is easy for him to imagine there may be reasons for it
within-doors which he cannot judge of without besides those i have
suggested which of themselves are of sufficient weight to engage his
acquiescence i should think it strange if he acquiesces not on this
occasion and that with a cheerfulness which may shew me that his last
letter is written from his heart for if he be really so much concerned
at his past faults as he pretends and has for some time pretended 
must he not of course have corrected in some degree the impetuosity
of his temper the first step to reformation as i conceive is to
subdue sudden gusts of passion from which frequently the greatest evils
arise and to learn to bear disappointments if the irascible passions
cannot be overcome what opinion can we have of the person's power over
those to which bad habit joined to greater temptation gives stronger
force 

pray my dear be so kind as to make inquiry by some safe hand after
the disguises mr lovelace assumes at the inn he puts up at in the poor
village of neale he calls it if it be the same i take it to be i
never knew it was considerable enough to have a name nor that it has an
inn in it 

as he must to be so constantly near us be much there i would be glad
to have some account of his behaviour and what the people think of him 
in such a length of time he must by his conduct either give scandal 
or hope of reformation pray my dear humour me in this inquiry i have
reason for it which you shall be acquainted with another time if the
result of the inquiry discover them not 




letter xx

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wednesday morning nine o'clock 


i am just returned from my morning walk and already have received a
letter from mr lovelace in answer to mine deposited last night he
must have had pen ink and paper with him for it was written in the
coppice with this circumstance on one knee kneeling with the other 
not from reverence to the written to however as you'll find 

well we are instructed early to keep these men at distance an
undesigning open heart where it is loth to disoblige is easily drawn
in i see to oblige more than ever it designed it is too apt to govern
itself by what a bold spirit is encouraged to expect of it it is very
difficult for a good-natured young person to give a negative where it
disesteems not 

our hearts may harden and contract as we gain experience and when we
have smarted perhaps for our easy folly and so they ought or we should
be upon very unequal terms with the world 

excuse these grave reflections this man has vexed me heartily i see
his gentleness was art fierceness and a temper like what i have been
too much used to at home are nature in him nothing i think shall
ever make me forgive him for surely there can be no good reason for
his impatience on an expectation given with reserve and revocable i
so much to suffer through him yet to be treated as if i were obliged
to bear insults from him 

but here you will be pleased to read his letter which i shall enclose 


to miss clarissa harlowe

good god 

what is now to become of me how shall i support this
disappointment no new cause on one knee kneeling with the other i
write my feet benumbed with midnight wanderings through the heaviest
dews that ever fell my wig and my linen dripping with the hoar frost
dissolving on them day but just breaking sun not risen to exhale may
it never rise again unless it bring healing and comfort to a benighted
soul in proportion to the joy you had inspired ever lovely promiser 
in such proportion is my anguish 

o my beloved creature but are not your very excuses confessions of
excuses inexcusable i know not what i write that servant in your
way by the great god of heaven that servant was not dared not could
not be in your way curse upon the cool caution that is pleased to
deprive me of an expectation so transporting 


 see letter xix 


and are things drawing towards a crisis between your friends and
you is not this a reason for me to expect the rather to expect the
promised interview 

can i write all that is in my mind say you impossible not the
hundredth part of what is in my mind and in my apprehension can i
write 

oh the wavering the changeable sex but can miss clarissa harlowe 

forgive me madam i know not what i write 

yet i must i do insist upon your promise or that you will condescend
to find better excuses for the failure or convince me that stronger
reasons are imposed upon you than those you offer a promise once
given upon deliberation given the promised only can dispense with 
except in cases of a very apparent necessity imposed upon the promiser 
which leaves no power to perform it 

the first promise you ever made me life and death perhaps depending
upon it my heart desponding from the barbarous methods resolved to be
taken with you in malice to me 

you would sooner choose death than solmes how my soul spurns the
competition o my beloved creature what are these but words whose
words sweet and ever adorable what promise breaker must i call
you how shall i believe the asseveration your supposed duty in the
question persecution so flaming hatred to me so strongly avowed 
after this instance of you so lightly dispensing with your promise 

if my dearest life you would prevent my distraction or at least 
distracted consequences renew the promised hope my fate is indeed
upon its crisis 

forgive me dearest creature forgive me i know i have written in too
much anguish of mind writing this in the same moment that the just
dawning light has imparted to me the heavy disappointment 

i dare not re-peruse what i have written i must deposit it it may
serve to shew you my distracted apprehension that this disappointment is
but a prelude to the greatest of all nor having here any other paper 
am i able to write again if i would on this gloomy spot gloomy is
my soul and all nature around me partakes of my gloom i trust it
therefore to your goodness if its fervour excite your displeasure
rather than your pity you wrong my passion and i shall be ready to
apprehend that i am intended to be the sacrifice of more miscreants
than one  have patience with me dearest creature i mean solmes and
your brother only   but if exerting your usual generosity you will
excuse and re appoint may that god whom you profess to serve and who
is the god of truth and of promises protect and bless you for both 
and for restoring to himself and to hope 

your ever-adoring yet almost desponding lovelace 

ivy cavern in the coppice day but just breaking 


 


this is the answer i shall return 


wednesday morning 

i am amazed sir at the freedom of your reproaches pressed and teased 
against convenience and inclination to give you a private meeting am i
to be thus challenged and upbraided and my sex reflected upon because
i thought it prudent to change my mind a liberty i had reserved
to myself when i made the appointment as you call it i wanted not
instances of your impatient spirit to other people yet may it be happy
for me that i can have this new one which shows that you can as
little spare me when i pursue the dictates of my own reason as you do
others for acting up to theirs two motives you must be governed by in
this excess the one my easiness the other your own presumption since
you think you have found out the first and have shown so much of the
last upon it i am too much alarmed not to wish and desire that your
letter of this day may conclude all the trouble you had from or for 

your humble servant cl harlowe 


 


i believe my dear i may promise myself your approbation whenever i
write or speak with spirit be it to whom it will indeed i find but
too much reason to exert it since i have to deal with people who
govern themselves in their conduct to me not by what is fit or decent 
right or wrong but by what they think my temper will bear i have till
very lately been praised for mine but it has always been by those who
never gave me opportunity to return the compliment to them some people
have acted as if they thought forbearance on one side absolutely
necessary for them and me to be upon good terms together and in this
case have ever taken care rather to owe that obligation than to lay it 
you have hinted to me that resentment is not natural to my temper and
that therefore it must soon subside it may be so with respect to my
relations but not to mr lovelace i assure you 


wednesday noon march 29 

we cannot always answer for what we can do but to convince you that i
can keep my above resolution with regard to mr lovelace angry as my
letter is and three hours since it was written i assure you that i
repent it not nor will soften it although i find it is not taken away 
and yet i hardly ever before did any thing in anger that i did not
repent in half an hour and question myself in less that that time 
whether i was right or wrong 

in this respite till tuesday i have a little time to look about me 
as i may say and to consider of what i have to do and can do and mr 
lovelace's insolence will make me go very home with myself not that i
think i can conquer my aversion to mr solmes i am sure i cannot but 
if i absolutely break with mr lovelace and give my friends convincing
proofs of it who knows but they will restore me to their favour and
let their views in relation to the other man go off by degrees or 
at least that i may be safe till my cousin morden arrives to whom 
i think i will write and the rather as mr lovelace has assured
me that my friends have written to him to make good their side of the
question 

but with all my courage i am exceedingly apprehensive about the
tuesday next and about what may result from my steadfastness for
steadfast i am sure i shall be they are resolved i am told to try
every means to induce me to comply with what they are determined upon 
and i am resolved to do all i can to avoid what they would force me to
do a dreadful contention between parents and child each hoping to
leave the other without excuse whatever the consequence may be 

what can i do advise me my dear something is strangely wrong
somewhere to make parents the most indulgent till now seem cruel in
a child's eye and a daughter till within these few weeks thought
unexceptionably dutiful appear in their judgment a rebel oh my
ambitious and violent brother what may he have to answer for to both 

be pleased to remember my dear that your last favour was dated on
saturday this is wednesday and none of mine have been taken away
since don't let me want you advice my situation is extremely
difficult but i am sure you love me still and not the less on that
account adieu my beloved friend 

cl harlowe 




letter xxi

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe thursday morning day-break march
30 

an accident and not remissness has occasioned my silence 

my mother was sent for on sunday night by her cousin larkin whom i
mentioned in one of my former and who was extremely earnest to see her 

this poor woman was always afraid of death and was one of those weak
persons who imagine that the making of their will must be an undoubted
forerunner of it 

she had always said when urged to the necessary work that whenever she
made it she should not live long after and one would think imagined
she was under an obligation to prove her words for though she had been
long bed-rid and was in a manner worn out before yet she thought
herself better till she was persuaded to make it and from that moment 
remembering what she used to prognosticate her fears helping on what
she feared as is often the case particularly in the small-pox grew
worse and had it in her head once to burn her will in hopes to grow
better upon it 

she sent my mother word that the doctors had given her over but that
she could not die till she saw her i told my mother that if she wished
her a chance for recovery she should not for that reason go but go
she would and what was worse would make me go with her and that at
an hour's warning for she said nothing of it to me till she was rising
in the morning early resolving to return again at night had there been
more time for argumentation to be sure i had not gone but as it was 
there was a kind of necessity that my preparation to obey her should 
in a manner accompany her command a command so much out of the way 
on such a solemn occasion and this i represented but to no purpose 
there never was such a contradicting girl in the world my wisdom
always made her a fool but she would be obliged this time proper or
improper 

i have but one way of accounting for this sudden whim of my mother and
that is this she had a mind to accept of mr hickman's offer to escort
her and i verily believe  i wish i were quite sure of it  had a mind
to oblige him with my company as far as i know to keep me out of
worse 

for would you believe it as sure as you are alive she is afraid for
her favourite hickman because of the long visit your lovelace though
so much by accident made me in her absence last time she was at the
same place i hope my dear you are not jealous too but indeed i
now-and-then when she teases me with praises which hickman cannot
deserve in return fall to praising those qualities and personalities in
lovelace which the other never will have indeed i do love to tease a
little bit that i do my mamma's girl i had like to have said 

as you know she is as passionate as i am pert you will not wonder to
be told that we generally fall out on these occasions she flies from
me at the long run it would be undutiful in me to leave her first and
then i get an opportunity to pursue our correspondence 

for now i am rambling let me tell you that she does not much favour
that for two reasons i believe one that i don't shew her all that
passes between us the other that she thinks i harden your mind against
your duty as it is called and with her for a reason at home as i
have hinted more than once parents cannot do wrong children cannot
oppose and be right this obliges me now-and-then to steal an hour as
i may say and not let her know how i am employed 

you may guess from what i have written how averse i was to comply with
such an unreasonable stretch of motherly authority but it came to be a
test of duty so i was obliged to yield though with a full persuasion
of being in the right 

i have always your reproofs upon these occasions in your late letters
stronger than ever a good reason why you'll say because more deserved
than ever i thank you kindly for your correction i hope to make
correction of it but let me tell you that your stripes whether
deserved or not have made me sensible deeper than the skin but of
this another time 

it was monday afternoon before we reached the old lady's house that
fiddling parading fellow  you know who i mean  made us wait for him two
hours and i to go to a journey i disliked only for the sake of having
a little more tawdry upon his housings which he had hurried his sadler
to put on to make him look fine being to escort his dear madam howe 
and her fair daughter i told him that i supposed he was afraid that
the double solemnity in the case that of the visit to a dying woman 
and that of his own countenance would give him the appearance of an
undertaker to avoid which he ran into as bad an extreme and i doubted
would be taken for a mountebank 

the man was confounded he took it as strongly as if his conscience
gave assent to the justice of the remark otherwise he would have borne
it better for he is used enough to this sort of treatment i thought he
would have cried i have heretofore observed that on this side of the
contract he seems to be a mighty meek sort of creature and though i
should like it in him hereafter perhaps yet i can't help despising him
a little in my heart for it now i believe my dear we all love your
blustering fellows best could we but direct the bluster and bid it
roar when and at whom we pleased 

the poor man looked at my mother she was so angry my airs upon it 
and my opposition to the journey have all helped that for half the
way she would not speak to me and when she did it was i wish i had
not brought you you know not what it is to condescend it is my fault 
not mr hickman's that you are here so much against your will have you
no eyes for this side of the chariot 

and then he fared the better from her as he always does for faring
worse from me for there was how do you now sir and how do you now 
mr hickman as he ambled now on this side of the chariot now on that 
stealing a prim look at me her head half out of the chariot kindly
smiling as if married to the man but a fortnight herself while i
always saw something to divert myself on the side of the chariot where
the honest man was not were it but old robin at a distance on his roan
keffel 

our courtship-days they say are our best days favour destroys
courtship distance increases it its essence is distance and to see
how familiar these men-wretches grow upon a smile what an awe they are
struck into when we frown who would not make them stand off who would
not enjoy a power that is to be short-lived 

don't chide me one bit for this my dear it is in nature i can't help
it nay for that matter i love it and wish not to help it so spare
your gravity i beseech you on this subject i set up not for a perfect
character the man will bear it and what need you care my mother
overbalances all he suffers and if he thinks himself unhappy he ought
never to be otherwise 

then did he not deserve a fit of the sullens think you to make us lose
our dinner for his parade since in so short a journey my mother would
not bait and lose the opportunity of coming back that night had the
old lady's condition permitted it to say nothing of being the cause 
that my mamma was in the glout with her poor daughter all the way 

at our alighting i gave him another dab but it was but a little one 
yet the manner and the air made up as i intended they should for
that defect my mother's hand was kindly put into his with a simpering
altogether bridal and with another how do you now sir all his plump
muscles were in motion and a double charge of care and obsequiousness
fidgeted up his whole form when he offered to me his officious palm 
my mother when i was a girl always bid me hold up my head i just then
remembered her commands and was dutiful i never held up my head so
high with an averted supercilious eye and a rejecting hand half
flourishing i have no need of help sir you are in my way 

he ran back as if on wheels with a face excessively mortified i had
thoughts else to have followed the too-gentle touch with a declaration 
that i had as many hands and feet as himself but this would have been
telling him a piece of news as to the latter that i hope he had not
the presumption to guess at 


 


we found the poor woman as we thought at the last gasp had we come
sooner we could not have got away as we intended that night you see i
am for excusing the man all i can and yet i assure you i have not so
much as a conditional liking to him my mother sat up most part of the
night expecting every hour would have been her poor cousin's last i
bore her company till two 

i never saw the approaches of death in a grown person before and was
extremely shocked death to one in health is a very terrible thing we
pity the person for what she suffers and we pity ourselves for what we
must some time hence in like sort suffer and so are doubly affected 

she held out till tuesday morning eleven as she had told my mother
that she had left her an executrix and her and me rings and mourning 
we were employed all that day in matters of the will  by which by the
way my own cousin jenny fynnett is handsomely provided for  so that it
was wednesday morning early before we could set out on our return 

it is true we got home having no housings to stay for by noon but
though i sent robin away before he dismounted who brought me back
a whole packet down to the same wednesday noon yet was i really so
fatigued and shocked as i must own at the hard death of the old
lady my mother likewise who has no reason to dislike this world being
indisposed from the same occasion that i could not set about writing
time enough for robin's return that night 

but having recruited my spirits my mother having also had a good night 
i arose with the dawn to write this and get it dispatched time enough
for your breakfast airing that your suspense might be as short as
possible 


 


i will soon follow this with another i will employ a person directly
to find out how lovelace behaves himself at his inn such a busy spirit
must be traceable 

but perhaps my dear you are indifferent now about him or his
employments for this request was made before he mortally offended you 
nevertheless i will have inquiry made the result it is very probable 
will be of use to confirm you in your present unforgiving temper and
yet if the poor man  shall i pity him for you my dear   should be
deprived of the greatest blessing any man on earth can receive and to
which he has the presumption with so little merit to aspire he will
have run great risks caught great colds hazarded fevers sustained
the highest indignities braved the inclemencies of skies and all
for nothing will not this move your generosity if nothing else in
his favour poor mr lovelace 

i would occasion no throb nor half-throb no flash of sensibility like
lightning darting in and as soon suppressed by a discretion that no
one of the sex ever before could give such an example of i would not 
i say and yet for such a trial of you to yourself rather than as an
impertinent overflow of raillery in your friend as money-takers try a
suspected guinea by the sound let me on such a supposition sound you 
by repeating poor mr lovelace 

and now my dear how is it with you how do you now as my mother says
to mr hickman when her pert daughter has made him look sorrowful 




letter xxii

mr hickman to mrs howe wednesday march 29 


madam 

it is with infinite regret that i think myself obliged by pen and ink 
to repeat my apprehension that it is impossible for me ever to obtain a
share in the affections of your beloved daughter o that it were not too
evident to every one as well as to myself even to our very servants 
that my love for her and my assiduities expose me rather to her scorn
 forgive me madam the hard word   than to the treatment due to a man
whose proposals have met with your approbation and who loves her above
all the women in the world 

well might the merit of my passion be doubted if like mr solmes to
the truly-admirably miss clarissa harlowe i could continue my addresses
to miss howe's distaste yet what will not the discontinuance cost me 

give me leave nevertheless dearest worthiest lady to repeat what i
told you on monday night at mrs larkin's with a heart even bursting
with grief that i wanted not the treatment of that day to convince
me that i am not nor ever can be the object of miss howe's voluntary
favour what hopes can there be that a lady will ever esteem as a
husband the man whom as a lover she despises will not every act
of obligingness from such a one be construed as an unmanly tameness
of spirit and entitle him the more to her disdain my heart is full 
forgive me if i say that miss howe's treatment of me does no credit
either to her education or fine sense 

since then it is too evident that she cannot esteem me and since as
i have heard it justly observed by the excellent miss clarissa harlowe 
that love is not a voluntary passion would it not be ungenerous to
subject the dear daughter to the displeasure of a mother so justly fond
of her and you madam while you are so good as to interest yourself in
my favour to uneasiness and why were i even to be sure at last of
succeeding by means of your kind partiality to me should i wish to make
the best-beloved of my soul unhappy since mutual must be our happiness 
or misery for life the consequence to both 

my best wishes will for ever attend the dear the ever-dear lady may
her nuptials be happy they must be so if she marry the man she can
honour with her love yet i will say that whoever be the happy the
thrice-happy man he can never love her with a passion more ardent and
more sincere than mine 

accept dear madam of my most grateful thanks for a distinction that
has been the only support of my presumption in an address i am obliged 
as utterly hopeless to discontinue a distinction on which and not
on my own merits i had entirely relied but which i find can avail me
nothing to the last hour of my life it will give me pleasure to think 
that had your favour your recommendation been of sufficient weight to
conquer what seems to be an invincible aversion i had been the happiest
of men 

i am dear madam with inviolable respect your ever obliged and
faithful humble servant charles hickman 




letter xxiii

mrs howe to charles hickman esq thursday march 30 


i cannot but say mr hickman but you have cause to be dissatisfied to
be out of humour to be displeased with nancy but upon my word but
indeed what shall i say yet this i will say that you good young
gentlemen know nothing at all of our sex shall i tell you but why
should i and yet i will that if nancy did not think well of you upon
the main she is too generous to treat you so freely as she does don't
you think she has courage enough to tell me she would not see you and
to refuse at any time seeing you as she knows on what account you come 
if she had not something in her head favourable to you fie that i am
forced to say thus much in writing when i have hinted it to you twenty
and twenty times by word of mouth 

but if you are so indifferent mr hickman if you think you can part
with her for her skittish tricks if my interest in your favour why 
mr hickman i must tell you that my nancy is worth bearing with if she
be foolish what is that owing to is it not to her wit let me tell
you sir you cannot have the convenience without the inconvenience 
what workman loves not a sharp tool to work with but is there not more
danger from a sharp tool than from a blunt one and what workman will
throw away a sharp tool because it may cut his fingers wit may be
likened to a sharp tool and there is something very pretty in wit let
me tell you often and often have i been forced to smile at her arch
turns upon me when i could have beat her for them and pray don't i
bear a great deal from her and why because i love her and would you
not wish me to judge of your love for her by my own and would not you
bear with her don't you love her what though with another sort of
love as well as i do i do assure you sir that if i thought you did
not well but it is plain that you don't and is it plain that you
don't well then you must do as you think best 

well might the merit of your passion be doubted you say if like mr 
solmes fiddle-faddle why you are a captious man i think has nancy
been so plain in her repulses of you as miss clary harlowe has been to
mr solmes does nancy love any man better than you although she may
not shew so much love to you as you wish for if she did let me tell
you she would have let us all hear of it what idle comparisons then 

but it mat be you are tired out it may be you have seen somebody
else it may be you would wish to change mistresses with that gay wretch
mr lovelace it may be too that in that case nancy would not be
sorry to change lovers the truly-admirable miss clarissa harlowe good
lack -but take care mr hickman that you do not praise any woman
living let her be as admirable and as excellent as she will above your
own mistress no polite man will do that surely and take care
too that you do not make her or me think you are in earnest in your
anger just though it may be as anger only i would not for a thousand
pounds that nancy should know that you can so easily part with her if
you have the love for her which you declare you have be sure if you
are not absolutely determined that you do not so much as whisper the
contents of this your letter to your own heart as i may say 

her treatment of you you say does no credit either to her education
or fine sense very home put truly nevertheless so say i but is not
hers the disgrace more than yours i can assure you that every body
blames her for it and why do they blame her why because they think
you merit better treatment at her hands and is not this to your credit 
who but pities you and blames he do the servants who as you observe 
see her skittish airs disrespect you for them do they not at such
times look concerned for you are they not then doubly officious in
their respects and services to you i have observed with pleasure 
that they are 

but you are afraid you shall be thought tame perhaps when married 
that you shall not be though manly enough i warrant and this was poor
mr howe's fear and many a tug did this lordly fear cost us both god
knows many more than needed i am sure and more than ought to have
been had he known how to bear and forbear as is the duty of those who
pretend to have most sense and pray which would you have to have most
sense the woman or the man 

well sir and now what remains if you really love nancy so well as you
say you do why i leave that to you you may if you please come to
breakfast with me in the morning but with no full heart nor resenting
looks i advise you except you can brave it out that have i when
provoked done many a time with my husband but never did i get any
thing by it with my daughter much less will you of which for your
observation i thought fit to advise you as from

your friend anabella howe 




letter xxiv

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe thursday morning 


i will now take some notice of your last favour but being so far
behind-hand with you must be brief 

in the first place as to your reproofs thus shall i discharge myself
of that part of my subject is it likely think you that i should avoid
deserving them now-and-then occasionally when i admire the manner in
which you give me your rebukes and love you the better for them and
when you are so well entitled to give them for what faults can you
possibly have unless your relations are so kind as to find you a few to
keep their many in countenance but they are as king to me in this as
to you for i may venture to affirm that any one who should read
your letters and would say you were right would not on reading mine 
condemn me for them quite wrong 

your resolution not to leave your father's house is right if you can
stay in it and avoid being solmes's wife 

i think you have answered solmes's letter as i should have answered
it will you not compliment me and yourself at once by saying that
was right 

you have in your letters to your uncle and the rest done all that you
ought to do you are wholly guiltless of the consequence be it what it
will to offer to give up your estate that would not i have done you
see this offer staggered them they took time to consider of it they
made my heart ache in the time they took i was afraid they would have
taken you at your word and so but for shame and for fear of lovelace 
i dare say they would you are too noble for them this i repeat is an
offer i would not have made let me beg of you my dear never to repeat
the temptation to them 

i freely own to you that their usage of you upon it and lovelace's
different treatment of you in his letter received at the same time 
would have made me his past redemption the duce take the man i was
going to say for not having so much regard to his character and morals 
as would have entirely justified such a step in a clarissa persecuted
as she is 


 see letter xviii 


i wonder not at your appointment with him i may further touch upon some
part of this subject by-and-by 

pray pray i pray you now my dearest friend contrive to send your
betty banes to me does the coventry act extend to women know ye the
least i will do shall be to send her home well soused in and dragged
through our deepest horsepond i'll engage if i get her hither that
she will keep the anniversary of her deliverance as long as she lives 

i wonder not at lovelace's saucy answer saucy as it really is if he
loves you as he ought he must be vexed at so great a disappointment 
the man must have been a detestable hypocrite i think had he not shown
his vexation your expectations of such a christian command of temper
in him in a disappointment of this nature especially are too early by
almost half a century in a man of his constitution but nevertheless i
am very far from blaming you for your resentment 


 see letter xx 


i shall be all impatience to know how this matter ends between you and
him but a few inches of brick wall between you so lately and now such
mountains and you think to hold it may be so 

you see you say that the temper he shewed in his letter was not
natural to him wretched creepers and insinuators yet when opportunity
serves as insolent encroachers this very hickman i make no doubt 
would be as saucy as your lovelace if he dared he has not half the
arrogant bravery of the other and can better hide his horns that's
all but whenever he has the power depend upon it he will butt at one
as valiantly as the other 

if ever i should be persuaded to have him i shall watch how the
obsequious lover goes off and how the imperative husband comes upon
him in short how he ascends and how i descend in the matrimonial
wheel never to take my turn again but by fits and starts like the
feeble struggles of a sinking state for its dying liberty 

all good-natured men are passionate says mr lovelace a pretty plea
to a beloved object in the plenitude of her power as much as to say 
greatly i value you madam i will not take pains to curb my passions
to oblige you' methinks i should be glad to hear from mr hickman such
a plea for good nature as this 

indeed we are too apt to make allowances for such tempers as early
indulgence has made uncontroulable and therefore habitually evil but
if a boisterous temper when under obligation is to be thus allowed
for what when the tables are turned will it expect you know a
husband who i fancy had some of these early allowances made for him 
and you see that neither himself nor any body else is the happier for
it 

the suiting of the tempers of two persons who are to come together is
a great matter and there should be boundaries fixed between them by
consent as it were beyond which neither should go and each should hold
the other to it or there would probably be encroachment in both to
illustrate my assertion by a very high and by a more manly as some
would think it than womanly instance if the boundaries of the
three estates that constitute our political union were not known 
and occasionally asserted what would become of the prerogatives and
privileges of each the two branches of the legislature would encroach
upon each other and the executive power would swallow up both 

but if two persons of discretion you'll say come together 

ay my dear that's true but if none but persons of discretion were
to marry and would it not surprise you if i were to advance that the
persons of discretion are generally single such persons are apt
to consider too much to resolve are not you and i complimented as
such and would either of us marry if the fellows and our friends
would let us alone 

but to the former point had lovelace made his addresses to me unless
indeed i had been taken with a liking for him more than conditional 
i would have forbid him upon the first passionate instance of his
good-nature as he calls it ever to see me more thou must bear with
me honest friend might i have said  had i condescended to say any
thing to him  an hundred times more than this begone therefore i
bear with no passions that are predominant to that thou has pretended
for me 

but to one of your mild and gentle temper it would be all one were
you married whether the man were a lovelace or a hickman in his
spirit you are so obediently principled that perhaps you would have
told a mild man that he must not entreat but command and that it
was beneath him not to exact from you the obedience you had so solemnly
vowed to him at the altar i know of old my dear your meek regard
to that little piddling part of the marriage-vow which some
prerogative-monger foisted into the office to make that a duty which
he knew was not a right 

our way of training-up you say makes us need the protection of the
brave very true and how extremely brave and gallant is it that this
brave man will free us from all insults but those which will go nearest
to our hearts that is to say his own 

how artfully has lovelace in the abstract you give me of one of
his letters calculated to your meridian generous spirits hate
compulsion he is certainly a deeper creature by much than once we
thought him he knows as you intimate that his own wild pranks cannot
be concealed and so owns just enough to palliate because it teaches
you not to be surprised at any new one that may come to your ears and
then truly he is however faulty a mighty ingenuous man and by no
means an hypocrite a character the most odious of all others to our
sex in a lover and the least to be forgiven were it only because 
when detected it makes us doubt the justice of those praises which we
are willing to believe he thought to be our due 

by means of this supposed ingenuity lovelace obtains a praise instead
of a merited dispraise and like an absolved confessionaire wipes off
as he goes along one score to begin another for an eye favourable
to him will not see his faults through a magnifying glass nor will a
woman willing to hope the best forbear to impute it to ill-will and
prejudice all that charity can make so imputable and if she even give
credit to such of the unfavourable imputations as may be too flagrant
to be doubted she will be very apt to take in the future hope which
he inculcates and which to question would be to question her own power 
and perhaps merit and thus may a woman be inclined to make a slight 
even a fancied merit atone for the most glaring vice 

i have a reason a new one for this preachment upon a text you have
given me but till i am better informed i will not explain myself 
if it come out as i shrewdly suspect it will the man my dear is a
devil and you must rather think of i protest i had like to have said
solmes than him 

but let this be as it will shall i tell you how after all his
offences he may creep in with you again 

i will thus then it is but to claim for himself the good-natured
character and this granted will blot out the fault of passionate
insolence and so he will have nothing to do but this hour to
accustom you to insult the next to bring you to forgive him upon
his submission the consequence must be that he will by this teazing 
break your resentment all to pieces and then a little more of the
insult and a little less of the submission on his part will go down 
till nothing else but the first will be seen and not a bit of the
second you will then be afraid to provoke so offensive a spirit and
at last will be brought so prettily and so audibly to pronounce the
little reptile word obey that it will do one's heart good to hear you 
the muscovite wife then takes place of the managed mistress and if
you doubt the progression be pleased my dear to take your mother's
judgment upon it 

but no more of this just now your situation is become too critical to
permit me to dwell upon these sort of topics and yet this is but an
affected levity with me my heart as i have heretofore said is a
sincere sharer in all your distresses my sun-shine darts but through
a drizly cloud my eye were you to see it when it seems to you so
gladdened as you mentioned in a former is more than ready to overflow 
even at the very passages perhaps upon which you impute to me the
archness of exultation 

but now the unheard-of cruelty and perverseness of some of your friends
 relations i should say i am always blundering thus   the as strange
determinedness of others your present quarrel with lovelace and your
approaching interview with solmes from which you are right to apprehend
a great deal are such considerable circumstances in your story that it
is fit they should engross all my attention 

you ask me to advise you how to behave upon solmes's visit i cannot for
my life i know they expect a great deal from it you had not else had
your long day complied with all i will say is that if solmes cannot
be prevailed for now that lovelace has so much offended you he never
will when the interview is over i doubt not but that i shall have
reason to say that all you did that all you said was right and could
not be better yet if i don't think so i won't say so that i promise
you 

only let me advise you to pull up a spirit even to your uncle if there
be occasion resent the vile and foolish treatment you meet with in
which he has taken so large a share and make him ashamed of it if you
can 

i know not upon recollection but this interview may be a good thing
for you however designed for when solmes sees if that be to be so 
that it is impossible he should succeed with you and your relations see
it too the one must i think recede and the other come to terms with
you upon offers that it is my opinion will go hard enough with you to
comply with when the still harder are dispensed with 

there are several passages in your last letters as well as in your
former which authorize me to say this but it would be unseasonable to
touch this subject farther just now 

but upon the whole i have no patience to see you thus made sport of
your brother's and sister's cruelty for what after so much steadiness
on your part in so many trials can be their hope except indeed it be
to drive you to extremity and to ruin you in the opinion of your uncles
as well as father 

i urge you by all means to send out of their reach all the letters
and papers you would not have them see methinks i would wish you to
deposit likewise a parcel of clothes linen and the like before your
interview with solmes lest you should not have an opportunity for it
afterwards robin shall fetch it away on the first orders by day or by
night 

i am in hopes to procure from my mother if things come to extremity 
leave for you to be privately with us 

i will condition to be good-humoured and even kind to her favourite 
if she will shew me an indulgence that shall make me serviceable to
mine 

this alternative has been a good while in my head but as your foolish
uncle has so strangely attached my mother to their views i cannot
promise that i shall succeed as i wish 

do not absolutely despair however what though the contention will be
between woman and woman i fancy i shall be able to manage it by the
help of a little female perseverance your quarrel with lovelace if
it continue will strengthen my hands and the offers you made in your
answer to your uncle harlowe's letter of sunday night last duly dwelt
upon must add force to my pleas 

i depend upon your forgiveness of all the perhaps unseasonable
flippancies of your naturally too lively yet most sincerely
sympathizing anna howe 




letter xxv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday march 31 


you have very kindly accounted for your silence people in misfortune
are always in doubt they are too apt to turn even unavoidable accidents
into slights and neglects especially in those whose favourable opinion
they wish to preserve 

i am sure i ought evermore to exempt my anna howe from the supposed
possibility of her becoming one of those who bask only in the sun-shine
of a friend but nevertheless her friendship is too precious to me not
to doubt my own merits on the one hand and not to be anxious for the
preservation of it on the other 

you so generously gave me liberty to chide you that i am afraid of
taking it because i could sooner mistrust my own judgment than that of
a beloved friend whose ingenuousness in acknowledging an imputed error
seems to set her above the commission of a wilful one this makes
me half-afraid to ask you if you think you are not too cruel too
ungenerous shall i say in your behaviour to a man who loves you so
dearly and is so worthy and so sincere a man 

only it is by you or i should be ashamed to be outdone in that true
magnanimity which makes one thankful for the wounds given by a true
friend i believe i was guilty of a petulance which nothing but my
uneasy situation can excuse if that can i am but almost afraid to beg
of you and yet i repeatedly do to give way to that charming spirit 
whenever it rises to your pen which smiles yet goes to the quick of my
fault what patient shall be afraid of a probe in so delicate a hand i
say i am almost afraid to pray you to give way to it for fear you
should for that very reason restrain it for the edge may be taken
off if it does not make the subject of its raillery wince a little 
permitted or desired satire may be apt in a generous satirist mending
as it rallies to turn too soon into panegyric yours is intended to
instruct and though it bites it pleases at the same time no fear of a
wound's wrankling or festering by so delicate a point as you carry 
not envenomed by personality not intending to expose or ridicule or
exasperate the most admired of our moderns know nothing of this art 
why because it must be founded in good nature and directed by a right
heart the man not the fault is generally the subject of their satire 
and were it to be just how should it be useful how should it answer
any good purpose when every gash for their weapon is a broad sword 
not a lancet lets in the air of public ridicule and exasperates where
it should heal spare me not therefore because i am your friend for
that very reason spare me not i may feel your edge fine as it is i
may be pained you would lose you end if i were not but after the first
sensibility as i have said more than once before i will love you the
better and my amended heart shall be all yours and it will then be
more worthy to be yours 

you have taught me what to say to and what to think of mr lovelace 
you have by agreeable anticipation let me know how it is probable he
will apply to me to be excused i will lay every thing before you that
shall pass on the occasion if he do apply that i may take your advice 
when it can come in time and when it cannot that i may receive your
correction or approbation as i may happen to merit either only one
thing must be allowed for me that whatever course i shall be permitted
or be forced to steer i must be considered as a person out of her own
direction tost to and fro by the high winds of passionate controul 
 and as i think unseasonable severity i behold the desired port 
the single state into which i would fain steer but am kept off by
the foaming billows of a brother's and sister's envy and by the raging
winds of a supposed invaded authority while i see in lovelace the
rocks on one hand and in solmes the sands on the other and tremble 
lest i should split upon the former or strike upon the latter 

but you my better pilot to what a charming hope do you bid me aspire 
if things come to extremity i will not as you caution me too much
depend upon your success with your mother in my favour for well i know
her high notions of implicit duty in a child but yet i will hope too 
because her seasonable protection may save me perhaps from a greater
rashness and in this case she shall direct me in all my ways i will
do nothing but by her orders and by her advice and yours not see
any body not write to any body nor shall any living soul but by her
direction and yours know where i am in any cottage place me i will
never stir out unless disguised as your servant i am now-and-then
permitted an evening-walk with you and this private protection to be
granted for no longer time than till my cousin morden comes which as i
hope cannot be long 

i am afraid i must not venture to take the hint you give me to deposit
some of my clothes although i will some of my linen as well as papers 

i will tell you why betty had for some time been very curious about my
wardrobe whenever i took out any of my things before her 

observing this i once on taking one of my garden-airings left my keys
in the locks and on my return surprised the creature with her hand upon
the keys as if shutting the door 

she was confounded at my sudden coming back i took no notice but on
her retiring i found my cloaths were not in the usual order 

i doubted not upon this that her curiosity was owing to the orders she
had received and being afraid they would abridge me of my airings if
their suspicions were not obviated it has ever since been my custom
 among other contrivances not only to leave my keys in the locks but
to employ the wench now-and-then in taking out my cloaths suit by suit 
on pretence of preventing their being rumpled or creased and to see
that the flowered silver suit did not tarnish sometimes declaredly to
give myself employment having little else to do with which employment
 superadded to the delight taken by the low as well as by the high of
our sex in seeing fine cloaths she seemed always i thought as well
pleased as if it answered one of the offices she had in charge 

to this and to the confidence they have in a spy so diligent and
to their knowing that i have not one confidant in a family in which
nevertheless i believe every servant loves me nor have attempted
to make one i suppose i owe the freedom i enjoy of my airings and
perhaps finding i make no movements towards going away they are the
more secure that i shall at last be prevailed upon to comply with
their measures since they must think that otherwise they give me
provocation enough to take some rash step in order to free myself
from a treatment so disgraceful and which  god forgive me if i judge
amiss   i am afraid my brother and sister would not be sorry to drive me
to take 

if therefore such a step should become necessary which i yet hope
will not i must be contented to go away with the clothes i shall
have on at the time my custom to be dressed for the day as soon as
breakfast is over when i have had no household employments to prevent
me will make such a step if i am forced to take it less suspected 
and the linen i shall deposit in pursuance of your kind hint cannot be
missed 

this custom although a prisoner as i may too truly say and neither
visited nor visiting i continue we owe to ourselves and to our sex 
you know to be always neat and never to be surprised in a way we
should be pained to be seen in 

besides people in adversity which is the state of trial of every good
quality should endeavour to preserve laudable customs that if sun
shine return they may not be losers by their trial 

does it not moreover manifest a firmness of mind in an unhappy
person to keep hope alive to hope for better days is half to deserve
them for could we have just ground for such a hope if we did not
resolve to deserve what that hope bids us aspire to then who shall
befriend a person who forsakes herself 

these are reflections by which i sometimes endeavour to support myself 

i know you don't despise my grave airs although with a view no doubt
to irradiate my mind in my misfortunes you rally me upon them every
body has not your talent of introducing serious and important lessons 
in such a happy manner as at once to delight and instruct 

what a multitude of contrivances may not young people fall upon if the
mind be not engaged by acts of kindness and condescension i am not used
by my friends of late as i always used their servants 

when i was intrusted with the family-management i always found it
right as well in policy as generosity to repose a trust in them not
to seem to expect or depend upon justice from them is in a manner to
bid them to take opportunities whenever they offer to be unjust 

mr solmes to expatiate on this low but not unuseful subject in his
more trifling solicitudes would have had a sorry key-keeper in me were
i mistress of a family i would not either take to myself or give to
servants the pain of keeping those i had reason to suspect people low
in station have often minds not sordid nay i have sometimes thought 
that even take number for number there are more honest low people 
than honest high in the one honest is their chief pride in the other 
the love of power of grandeur of pleasure mislead and that and their
ambition induce a paramount pride which too often swallows up the more
laudable one 

many of the former would scorn to deceive a confidence but i have seen 
among the most ignorant of their class a susceptibility of resentment 
if their honesty has been suspected and have more than once been forced
to put a servant right whom i have heard say that although she valued
herself upon her honesty no master or mistress should suspect her for
nothing 

how far has the comparison i had in my head between my friends
treatment of me and my treatment of the servants carried me but we
always allowed ourselves to expatiate on such subjects whether low
or high as might tend to enlarge our minds or mend our management 
whether notional or practical and whether such expatiating respected
our present or might respect our probable future situations 

what i was principally leading to was to tell you how ingenious i am in
my contrivances and pretences to blind my gaoleress and to take off the
jealousy of her principals on my going down so often into the garden and
poultry-yard people suspiciously treated are never i believe at a loss
for invention sometimes i want air and am better the moment i am out
of my chamber sometimes spirits and then my bantams and pheasants or
the cascade divert me the former by their inspiring liveliness the
latter by its echoing dashes and hollow murmurs sometimes solitude
is of all things my wish and the awful silence of the night the
spangled element and the rising and setting sun how promotive of
contemplation sometimes when i intend nothing and expect no letters 
i am officious to take betty with me and at others bespeak her
attendance when i know she is otherwise employed and cannot give it
me 

these more capital artifices i branch out into lesser ones without
number yet all have not only the face of truth but are real truths 
although not my principal motive how prompt a thing is will what
impediments does dislike furnish how swiftly through every
difficulty do we move with the one how tardily with the other every
trifling obstruction weighing us down as if lead were fastened to our
feet 


friday morning eleven o'clock 

i have already made up my parcel of linen my heart ached all the time
i was employed about it and still aches at the thoughts of its being a
necessary precaution 

when the parcel comes to your hands as i hope it safely will you will
be pleased to open it you will find in it two parcels sealed up one
of which contains the letters you have not yet seen being those written
since i left you in the other are all the letters and copies of letters
that have passed between you and me since i was last with you with some
other papers on subjects so much above me that i cannot wish them to be
seen by any body whose indulgence i am not so sure of as i am of yours 
if my judgment ripen with my years perhaps i may review them 

mrs norton used to say from her reverend father that youth was the
time of life for imagination and fancy to work in then were a writer
to lay by his works till riper years and experience should direct the
fire rather to glow than to flame out something between both might
perhaps be produced that would not displease a judicious eye 

in a third division folded up separately are all mr lovelace's
letters written to me since he was forbidden this house and copies
of my answers to them i expect that you will break the seals of this
parcel and when you have perused them all give me your free opinion of
my conduct 

by the way not a line from that man not one line wednesday i
deposited mine it remained there on wednesday night what time it was
taken away yesterday i cannot tell for i did not concern myself about
it till towards night and then it was not there no return at ten this
day i suppose he is as much out of humour as i with all my heart 

he may be mean enough perhaps if ever i should put it into his power 
to avenge himself for the trouble he has had with me but that now i
dare say i never shall 

i see what sort of a man the encroacher is and i hope we are equally
sick of one another my heart is vexedly easy if i may so describe
it vexedly because of the apprehended interview with solmes and the
consequences it may be attended with or else i should be quite easy 
for why i have not deserved the usage i receive and could i be rid of
solmes as i presume i am of lovelace their influence over my father 
mother and uncles against me could not hold 

the five guineas tied up in one corner of a handkerchief under the
linen i beg you will let pass as an acknowledgement for the trouble
i give your trusty servant you must not chide me for this you know i
cannot be easy unless i have my way in these little matters 

i was going to put up what little money i have and some of my
ornaments but they are portable and i cannot forget them besides 
should they suspecting me desire to see any of the jewels and were
i not able to produce them it would amount to a demonstration of an
intention which would have a guilty appearance to them 


friday one o'clock in the wood-house 

no letter yet from this man i have luckily deposited my parcel and
have your letter of last night if robert take this without the parcel 
pray let him return immediately for it but he cannot miss it i think 
and must conclude that it is put there for him to take away you may
believe from the contents of yours that i shall immediately write
again 

clarissa harlowe 




letter xxvi

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe thursday night march 30 


the fruits of my inquiry after your abominable wretch's behaviour and
baseness at the paltry alehouse which he calls an inn prepare to hear 

wrens and sparrows are not too ignoble a quarry for this villainous
gos-hawk his assiduities his watchings his nightly risques the
inclement weather he journeys in must not be all placed to your
account he has opportunities of making every thing light to him of
that sort a sweet pretty girl i am told innocent till he went
thither now ah poor girl who knows what 

but just turned of seventeen his friend and brother-rake a man of
humour and intrigue as i am told to share the social bottle with 
and sometimes another disguised rake or two no sorrow comes near their
hearts be not disturbed my dear at his hoarsenesses his pretty 
betsey his rosebud as the vile wretch calls her can hear all he says 

he is very fond of her they say she is innocent even yet her father 
her grandmother believe her to be so he is to fortune her out to a
young lover ah the poor young lover ah the poor simple girl 

mr hickman tells me that he heard in town that he used to be often
at plays and at the opera with women and every time with a different
one ah my sweet friend but i hope he is nothing to you if all this
were truth but this intelligence in relation to this poor girl will
do his business if you had been ever so good friends before 

a vile wretch cannot such purity in pursuit in view restrain him but
i leave him to you there can be no hope of him more of a fool 
than of such a man yet i wish i may be able to snatch the poor young
creature out of his villainous paws i have laid a scheme to do so if
indeed she be hitherto innocent and heart-free 

he appears to the people as a military man in disguise secreting
himself on account of a duel fought in town the adversary's life in
suspense they believe he is a great man his friend passes for an
inferior officer upon a footing of freedom with him he accompanied by
a third man who is a sort of subordinate companion to the second the
wretch himself with but one servant 

o my dear how pleasantly can these devils as i must call them pass
their time while our gentle bosoms heave with pity for their supposed
sufferings for us 


 


i have sent for this girl and her father and am just now informed that
i shall see them i will sift them thoroughly i shall soon find out
such a simple thing as this if he has not corrupted her already and if
he has i shall soon find out that too if more art than nature appears
either in her or her father i shall give them both up but depend upon
it the girl's undone 

he is said to be fond of her he places her at the upper end of his
table he sets her a-prattling he keeps his friends at a distance from
her she prates away he admires for nature all she says once was heard
to call her charming little creature an hundred has he called so no
doubt he puts her upon singing he praises her wild note o my dear 
the girl's undone must be undone the man you know is lovelace 

let em bring wyerley to you if they will have you married any body
but solmes and lovelace be yours so advises

your anna howe 

my dearest friend consider this alehouse as his garrison him as an
enemy his brother-rakes as his assistants and abettors would not your
brother would not your uncles tremble if they knew how near them he
is as they pass to and fro i am told he is resolved you shall not be
carried to your uncle antony's what can you do with or without such
an enterprising 

fill up the blank i leave i cannot find a word bad enough




letter xxvii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday three o'clock 


you incense alarm and terrify me at the same time hasten my
dearest friend hasten to me what further intelligence you can gather
about this vilest of men 

but never talk of innocence of simplicity and this unhappy girl 
together must she not know that such a man as that dignified in his
very aspect and no disguise able to conceal his being of condition 
must mean too much when he places her at the upper end of his table 
and calls her by such tender names would a girl modest as simple 
above seventeen be set a-singing at the pleasure of such a man as
that a stranger and professedly in disguise would her father and
grandmother if honest people and careful of their simple girl permit
such freedoms 

keep his friend at a distance from her to be sure his designs are
villainous if they have not been already effected 

warn my dear if not too late the unthinking father of his child's
danger there cannot be a father in the world who would sell his
child's virtue nor mother the poor thing 

i long to hear the result of your intelligence you shall see the simple
creature you tell me let me know what sort of a girl she is a sweet
pretty girl you say a sweet pretty girl my dear they are sweet
pretty words from your pen but are they yours or his of her if she be
so simple if she have ease and nature in her manner in her speech and
warbles prettily her wild notes why such a girl as that must
engage such a profligate wretch as now indeed i doubt this man is 
accustomed perhaps to town women and their confident ways must
deeply and for a long season engage him since perhaps when her
innocence is departed she will endeavour by art to supply the loss of
the natural charms which now engage him 

fine hopes of such a wretch's reformation i would not my dear for the
world have any thing to say but i need not make resolutions i have
not opened nor will i open his letter a sycophant creature with
his hoarsenesses got perhaps by a midnight revel singing to his wild
note singer and only increased in the coppice 

to be already on a footing in his esteem i mean for myself i
despise him i hate myself almost for writing so much about him and of
such a simpleton as this sweet pretty girl as you call her but no one
can be either sweet or pretty that is not modest that is not virtuous 

and now my dear i will tell you how i came to put you upon this
inquiry 

this vile joseph leman had given a hint to betty and she to me as if
lovelace would be found out to be a very bad man at a place where he
had been lately seen in disguise but he would see further he said 
before he told her more and she promised secrecy in hope to get at
further intelligence i thought it could be no harm to get you to
inform yourself and me of what could be gathered and now i see his
enemies are but too well warranted in their reports of him and if the
ruin of this poor young creature be his aim and if he had not known her
but for his visits to harlowe-place i shall have reason to be doubly
concerned for her and doubly incensed against so vile a man 


 it will be seen in vol i letter xxxiv that mr lovelace's
 motive for sparing his rosebud was twofold first because
 his pride was gratified by the grandmother's desiring him to
 spare her grand-daughter many a pretty rogue say he had i
 spared whom i did not spare had my power been
 acknowledged and my mercy in time implored but the
 debellare superbos should be my motto were i to have a new
 one 

 his other motive will be explained in the following passage 
 in the same i never was so honest for so long together 
 says he since my matriculation it behoves me so to be 
 some way or other my recess  at the little inn  may be found
 out and it then will be thought that my rosebud has
 attracted me a report in my favour from simplicities so
 amiable may establish me etc 

 accordingly as the reader will hereafter see mr lovelace
 finds by the effects his expectations from the contrivance
 he set on foot by means of his agent joseph leman who
 plays as above upon betty barnes fully answered though
 he could not know what passed on the occasion between the
 two ladies 

 this explanation is the more necessary to be given as
 several of our readers through want of due attention have
 attributed to mr lovelace on his behaviour to his rosebud 
 a greater merit than was due to him and moreover imagined 
 that it was improbable that a man who was capable of
 acting so generously as they supposed in this instance 
 should be guilty of any atrocious vileness not considering 
 that love pride and revenge as he owns in vol i letter
 xxxi were ingredients of equal force in his composition 
 and that resistance was a stimulus to him 


i think i hate him worse than i do solmes himself 

but i will not add one more word about hi and after i have told you 
that i wish to know as soon as possible what further occurs from your
inquiry i have a letter from him but shall not open it till i do 
and then if it come out as i dare say it will i will directly put the
letter unopened into the place i took it from and never trouble myself
more about him adieu my dearest friend 

cl harlowe 




letter xxviii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe friday noon march 31 


justice obliges me to forward this after my last on the wings of the
wind as i may say i really believe the man is innocent of this
one accusation i think he must be acquitted and i am sorry i was so
forward in dispatching away my intelligence by halves 

i have seen the girl she is really a very pretty a very neat and 
what is still a greater beauty a very innocent young creature he who
could have ruined such an undersigned home-bred must have been
indeed infernally wicked her father is an honest simple man entirely
satisfied with his child and with her new acquaintance 

i am almost afraid for your heart when i tell you that i find now i
have got to the bottom of this inquiry something noble come out in this
lovelace's favour 

the girl is to be married next week and this promoted and brought about
by him he is resolved her father says to make one couple happy 
and wishes he could make more so  there's for you my dear   and she
professes to love he has given her an hundred pounds the grandmother
actually has it in her hands to answer to the like sum given to the
youth by one of his own relation while mr lovelace's companion 
attracted by the example has given twenty-five guineas to the father 
who is poor towards clothes to equip the pretty rustic 

mr lovelace and his friend the poor man says when they first came to
his house affected to appear as persons of low degree but now he knows
the one but mentioned it in confidence to be colonel barrow the other
captain sloane the colonel he owns was at first very sweet upon his
girl but her grandmother's begging of him to spare her innocence he
vowed that he never would offer any thing but good counsel to her he
kept his word and the pretty fool acknowledged that she never
could have been better instructed by the minister himself from the
bible-book the girl pleased me so well that i made her visit to me
worth her while 

but what my dear will become of us now lovelace not only reformed 
but turned preacher what will become of us now why my sweet friend 
your generosity is now engaged in his favour fie upon this generosity 
i think in my heart that it does as much mischief to the noble-minded 
as love to the ignobler what before was only a conditional liking i
am now afraid will turn to liking unconditional 

i could not endure to change my invective into panegyric all at once 
and so soon we or such as i at least love to keep ourselves in
countenance for a rash judgment even when we know it to be rash 
everybody has not your generosity in confessing a mistake it requires
a greatness of soul frankly to do it so i made still further inquiry
after his life and manner and behaviour there in hopes to find
something bad but all uniform 

upon the whole mr lovelace comes out with so much advantage from this
inquiry that were there the least room for it i should suspect the
whole to be a plot set on foot to wash a blackamoor white adieu my
dear 

anna howe 




letter xxix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe saturday april 1 


hasty censures do indeed subject themselves to the charge of
variableness and inconsistency in judgment and so they ought for 
if you even you my dear were so loth to own a mistake as in the
instance before us you pretend you were i believe i should not have
loved you so well as i really do love you nor could you in that case 
have so frankly thrown the reflection i hint at upon yourself have not
your mind been one of the most ingenuous that ever woman boasted 

mr lovelace has faults enow to deserve very severe censure although
he be not guilty of this if i were upon such terms with him as he could
wish me to be i should give him such a hint that this treacherous
joseph leman cannot be so much attached to him as perhaps he thinks
him to be if it were he would not have been so ready to report to his
disadvantage and to betty barnes too this slight affair of the pretty
rustic joseph has engaged betty to secrecy promising to let her and
her young master to know more when he knows the whole of the matter 
and this hinders her from mentioning it as she is nevertheless agog to
do to my sister or brother and then she does not choose to disoblige
joseph for although she pretends to look above him she listens i
believe to some love-stories he tells her 

women having it not in their power to begin a courtship some of them
very frequently i believe lend an ear where their hearts incline not 

but to say no more of these low people neither of whom i think
tolerably of i must needs own that as i should for ever have despised
this man had he been capable of such a vile intrigue in his way to
harlowe-place and as i believe he was capable of it it has indeed  i
own it has  proportionably engaged my generosity as you call it in his
favour perhaps more than i may have reason to wish it had and rally
me as you will pray tell me fairly my dear would it not have had such
an effect upon you 

then the real generosity of the act i protest my beloved friend 
if he would be good for the rest of his life from this time i would
forgive him a great many of his past errors were it only for the
demonstration he has given in this that he is capable of so good and
bountiful a manner of thinking 

you may believe i made no scruple to open his letter after the receipt
of your second on this subject nor shall i of answering it as i have
no reason to find fault with it an article in his favour procured
him however so much the easier i must own by way of amends for the
undue displeasure i took against him though he knows it not 

is it lucky enough that this matter was cleared up to me by your
friendly diligence so soon for had i written before it was it would
have been to reinforce my dismission of him and perhaps i should have
mentioned the very motive for it affected me more than i think it
ought and then what an advantage would that have given him when he
could have cleared up the matter so happily for himself 

when i send you this letter of his you will see how very humble he is 
what acknowledgements of natural impatience what confession of faults 
as you prognosticated 

a very different appearance i must own all these make now the story
of the pretty rustic is cleared up to what they would have made had it
not 

you will see how he accounts to me that he could not by reason of
indisposition come for my letter in person and the forward creature
labours the point as if he thought i should be uneasy that he did not 
i am indeed sorry he should be ill on my account and i will allow that
the suspense he has been in for some time past must have been vexatious
enough to so impatient a spirit but all is owing originally to himself 

you will find him in the presumption of being forgiven full of
contrivances and expedients for my escaping my threatened compulsion 

i have always said that next to being without fault is the
acknowledgement of a fault since no amendment can be expected where an
error is defended but you will see in this very letter an haughtiness
even in his submissions tis true i know not where to find fault as
to the expression yet cannot i be satisfied that his humility is
humility or even an humility upon such conviction as one should be
pleased with 

to be sure he is far from being a polite man yet is not directly and
characteristically as i may say unpolite but his is such a sort of
politeness as has by a carelessness founded on very early indulgence 
and perhaps on too much success in riper years and an arrogance built
upon both grown into assuredness and of course i may say into
indelicacy 

the distance you recommend at which to keep these men is certainly
right in the main familiarity destroys reverence but with whom not
with those surely who are prudent grateful and generous 

but it is very difficult for persons who would avoid running into one
extreme to keep clear of another hence mr lovelace perhaps thinks
it the mark of a great spirit to humour his pride though at the expense
of his politeness but can the man be a deep man who knows not how to
make such distinctions as a person of but moderate parts cannot miss 

he complains heavily of my readiness to take mortal offence at him and
to dismiss him for ever it is a high conduct he says he must be frank
enough to tell me a conduct that must be very far from contributing to
allay his apprehensions of the possibility that i may be prosecuted into
my relations' measures in behalf of mr solmes 

you will see how he puts his present and his future happiness with
regard to both worlds entirely upon me  the ardour with which he vows
and promises i think the heart only can dictate how else can one guess
at a man's heart 

you will also see that he has already heard of the interview i am to
have with mr solmes  and with what vehemence and anguish he expresses
himself on the occasion i intend to take proper notice of the ignoble
means he stoops to to come at his early intelligence of our family 
if persons pretending to principle bear not their testimony against
unprincipled actions what check can they have 

you will see how passionately he presses me to oblige him with a few
lines before the interview between mr solmes and me takes place if 
as he says it must take place to confirm his hope that i have no
view in my present displeasure against him to give encouragement to
solmes an apprehension he says that he must be excused for repeating 
especially as the interview is a favour granted to that man which
i have refused to him since as he infers were it not with such an
expectation why should my friends press it 


 


i have written and to this effect that i had never intended to write
another line to a man who could take upon himself to reflect upon my
sex and myself for having thought fit to make use of my own judgment 

i tell him that i have submitted to the interview with mr solmes 
purely as an act of duty to shew my friends that i will comply with
their commands as far as i can and that i hope when mr solmes himself
shall see how determined i am he will cease to prosecute a suit in
which it is impossible he should succeed with my consent 

i assure him that my aversion to mr solmes is too sincere to permit
me to doubt myself on this occasion but nevertheless he must not
imagine that my rejecting of mr solmes is in favour to him that i
value my freedom and independency too much if my friends will but leave
me to my own judgment to give them up to a man so uncontroulable and
who shews me beforehand what i have to expect from him were i in his
power 

i express my high disapprobation of the methods he takes to come
at what passes in a private family the pretence of corrupting other
people's servants by way of reprisal for the spies they have set upon
him i tell him is a very poor excuse and no more than an attempt to
justify one meanness by another 

there is i observe to him a right and a wrong in every thing let
people put what glosses they please upon their action to condemn a
deviation and to follow it by as great a one what i ask him is this 
but propagating a general corruption a stand must be made somebody 
turn round the evil as many as may or virtue will be lost and shall it
not be i a worthy mind would ask that shall make this stand 

i leave him to judge whether his be a worthy one tried by this rule 
and whether knowing the impetuosity of his own disposition and the
improbability there is that my father and family will ever be reconciled
to him i ought to encourage his hopes 

these spots and blemishes i further tell him give me not earnestness
enough for any sake but his own to wish him in a juster and nobler
train of thinking and acting for that i truly despised many of the ways
he allows himself in our minds are therefore infinitely different 
and as to his professions of reformation i must tell him that
profuse acknowledgements without amendment are but to me as so many
anticipating concessions which he may find much easier to make thane
either to defend himself or amend his errors 

i inform him that i have been lately made acquainted'  and so i have
by betty and she by my brother  with the weak and wanton airs he gives
himself of declaiming against matrimony i severely reprehend him on
this occasion and ask him with what view he can take so witless so
despicable a liberty in which only the most abandoned of men allow
themselves and yet presume to address me 


i tell him that if i am obliged to go to my uncle antony's it is not
to be inferred that i must therefore necessarily be mr solmes's wife 
since i must therefore so sure perhaps that the same exceptions lie
so strongly against my quitting a house to which i shall be forcibly
carried as if i left my father's house and at the worst i may be
able to keep them in suspense till my cousin morden comes who will have
a right to put me in possession of my grandfather's estate if i insist
upon it 

this i doubt is somewhat of an artifice which can only be excusable 
as it is principally designed to keep him out of mischief for i have
but little hope if carried thither whether sensible or senseless 
absolutely if i am left to the mercy of my brother and sister but they
will endeavour to force the solemn obligation upon me otherwise were
there but any prospect of avoiding this by delaying or even by taking
things to make me ill if nothing else would do till my cousin comes 
i hope i should not think of leaving even my uncle's house for i should
not know how to square it to my own principles to dispense with the
duty i owe to my father wherever it shall be his will to place me 

but while you give me the charming hope that in order to avoid one
man i shall not be under the necessity of throwing myself upon the
friends of the other i think my case not desperate 


 


i see not any of my family nor hear from them in any way of kindness 
this looks as if they themselves expected no great matters from the
tuesday's conference which makes my heart flutter every time i think of
it 

my uncle antony's presence on the occasion i do not much like but i
had rather meet him than my brother or sister yet my uncle is very
impetuous i can't think mr lovelace can be much more so at least he
cannot look angry as my uncle with his harder features can these
sea-prospered gentlemen as my uncle has often made me think not used
to any but elemental controul and even ready to buffet that bluster
often as violently as the winds they are accustomed to be angry at 

i believe mr solmes will look as much like a fool as i shall do if it
be true as my uncle harlowe writes and as betty often tells me that
he is as much afraid of seeing me as i am of seeing him 

adieu my happy thrice-happy miss howe who have no hard terms fixed
to your duty who have nothing to do but to fall in with a choice your
mother has made for you to which you have not nor can have a just
objection except the frowardness of our sex as our free censurers
would perhaps take the liberty to say makes it one that the choice was
your mother's at first hand perverse nature we know loves not to
be prescribed to although youth is not so well qualified either by
sedateness or experience to choose for itself 

to know your own happiness and that it is now nor to leave it to after
reflection to look back upon the preferable past with a heavy and self
accusing heart that you did not choose it when you might have chosen
it is all that is necessary to complete your felicity and this power
is wished you by

your clarissa harlowe 




letter xxx

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe saturday april 2 


i ought yesterday to have acknowledged the receipt of your parcel robin
tells me that the joseph leman whom you mention as the traitor saw
him he was in the poultry-yard and spoke to robin over the bank
which divides that from the green-lane what brings you hither mr 
robert but i can tell hie away as fast as you can 

no doubt but their dependence upon this fellow's vigilance and upon
betty's leaves you more at liberty in your airings than you would
otherwise be but you are the only person i ever heard of who in such
circumstances had not some faithful servant to trust little offices to 
a poet my dear would not have gone to work for an angelica without
giving her her violetta her cleante her clelia or some such
pretty-named confidant an old nurse at the least 

i read to my mother several passages of your letters but your last
paragraph in your yesterday's quite charmed her you have won her heart
by it she told me and while her fit of gratitude for it lasted i was
thinking to make my proposal and to press it with all the earnestness
i could give it when hickman came in making his legs and stroking his
cravat and ruffles 

i could most freely have ruffled him for it as it was sir said i saw
you not some of the servants could not one of them have come in before
you 

he begged pardon looked as if he knew not whether he had best keep his
ground or withdraw till my mother his fast friend interposed why 
nancy we are not upon particulars pray mr hickman sit down 

by your le ave good madam to me you know his drawl when his muscles
give him the respectful hesitation 

ay ay pray sit down honest man if you are weary but by mamma 
if you please i desire my hoop may have its full circumference all
they're good for that i know is to clean dirty shoes and to keep
fellows at a distance 

strange girl cried my mother displeased but with a milder turn ay 
ay mr hickman sit down by me i have no such forbidding folly in my
dress 

i looked serious and in my heart was glad this speech of hers was not
made to your uncle antony 

my mother with the true widow's freedom would mighty prudently have
led into the subject we had been upon and would have had read to him i
question not that very paragraph in your letter which is so much in
his favour he was highly obliged to dear miss harlowe she would assure
him that she did say 

but i asked him if he had any news by his last letters from london a
question which he always understands to be a subject changer for
otherwise i never put it and so if he be but silent i am not angry
with him that he answers it not 

i choose not to mention my proposal before him till i know how it will
be relished by my mother if it be not well received perhaps i may
employ him on the occasion yet i don't like to owe him an obligation 
if i could help it for men who have his views in their heads do so
parade it so strut about if a woman condescend to employ them in her
affairs that one has no patience with them 

however if i find not an opportunity this day i will make one
to-morrow 

i shall not open either of your sealed-up parcels but in your presence 
there is no need your conduct is out of all question with me and by
the extracts you have given me from his letters and your own i know all
that relates to the present situation of things between you 

i was going to give you a little flippant hint or two but since you
wish to be thought superior to all our sex in the command of yourself 
and since indeed you deserve to be thought so i will spare you you
are however at times more than half inclined to speak out that
you do not is only owing to a little bashful struggle between you and
yourself as i may say when that is quite got over i know you will
favour me undisguisedly with the result 

i cannot forgive your taking upon me at so extravagant a rate too to
pay my mother's servants indeed i am and i will be angry with you for
it a year's wages at once well nigh only as unknown to my mother i
make it better for the servants according to their merits how it made
the man stare and it may be his ruin too as far as i know if he
should buy a ring and marry a sorry body in the neighbourhood with the
money one would be loth a twelvemonth hence that the poor old fellow
should think he had reason to wish the bounty never conferred 

i must give you your way in these things you say and i know there is
no contradicting you for you were ever putting too great a value upon
little offices done for you and too little upon the great ones you do
for others the satisfaction you have in doing so i grant it repays
you but why should you by the nobleness of your mind throw reproaches
upon the rest of the world particularly upon your own family and upon
ours too 

if as i have heard you say it is a good rule to give words the
hearing but to form our judgment of men and things by deeds only 
what shall we think of one who seeks to find palliatives in words for
narrowness of heart in the very persons her deeds so silently yet so
forcibly reflect upon why blush you not my dear friend to be thus
singular when you meet with another person whose mind is like your
own then display your excellencies as you please but till then 
for pity's sake let your heart and your spirit suffer a little
contradiction 

i intended to write but a few lines chiefly to let you know your
parcels are come safe and accordingly i began in a large hand and i
am already come to the end of my second sheet but i could write a quire
without hesitation upon a subject so copious and so beloved as is your
praise not for this single instance of your generosity since i am
really angry with you for it but for the benevolence exemplified in
the whole tenor of your life and action of which this is but a common
instance heaven direct you in your own arduous trials is all i have
room to add and make you as happy as you think to be

your own anna howe 




letter xxxi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sunday night april 2 


i have many new particulars to acquaint you with that shew a great
change in the behaviour of my friends as i find we have i will give
these particulars to you as they offered 

all the family was at church in the morning they brought good dr lewen
with them in pursuance of a previous invitation and the doctor sent up
to desire my permission to attend me in my own apartment 

you may believe it was easily granted 

so the doctor came up 

we had a conversation of near an hour before dinner but to my
surprise he waved every thing that would have led me to the subject i
supposed he wanted to talk about at last i asked him if it were not
thought strange i should be so long absent from church he made me some
handsome compliments upon it but said for his part he had ever made
it a rule to avoid interfering in the private concerns of families 
unless desired to do so 

i was prodigiously disappointed but supposing that he was thought too
just a man to be made a judge of in this cause i led no more to it 
nor when he was called down to dinner did he take the least notice of
leaving me behind him there 

but this was not the first time since my confinement that i thought it a
hardship not to dine below and when i parted with him on the stairs a
tear would burst its way and he hurried down his own good-natured eyes
glistening for he saw it nor trusted he his voice lest the accent i
suppose should have discovered his concern departing in silence though
with his usual graceful obligingness 

i hear that he praised me and my part in the conversation that
passed between us to shew them i suppose that it was not upon the
interesting subjects which i make no doubt he was desired not to enter
upon 

he left me so dissatisfied yet so perplexed with this new way of
treatment that i never found myself so much disconcerted and out of my
train 

but i was to be more so this was to be a day of puzzle to me pregnant
puzzle if i may say so for there must great meaning lie behind it 

in the afternoon all but my brother and sister went to church with
the good doctor who left his compliments for me i took a walk in the
garden my brother and sister walked in it too and kept me in their
eye a good while on purpose as i thought that i might see how gay and
good-humoured they were together at last they came down the walk that i
was coming up hand-in-hand lover-like 

your servant miss your servant sir passed between my brother and me 

is it not coldish clary in a kinder voice than usual said my sister 
and stopped i stopped and courtesied low to her half-courtesy i
think not sister said i 

she went on i courtesied without return and proceeded turning to my
poultry-yard 

by a shorter turn arm-in-arm they were there before me 

i think clary said my brother you must present me with some of this
breed for scotland 

if you please brother 

i'll choose for you said my sister 

and while i fed them they pointed to half a dozen yet intending
nothing by it i believe but to shew a deal of love and good-humour to
each other before me 

my uncles next at their return from church were to do me the honour
of their notice they bid betty tell me they would drink tea with me
in my own apartment now thought i shall i have the subject of next
tuesday enforced upon me 

but they contradicted the order for tea and only my uncle harlowe came
up to me 

half-distant half-affectionate at his entering my chamber was the
air he put on to his daughter-niece as he used to call me and i threw
myself at his feet and besought his favour 

none of these discomposures child none of these apprehensions you
will now have every body's favour all is coming about my dear i was
impatient to see you i could no longer deny myself this satisfaction 
he then raised me and kissed me and called me charming creature 

but he waved entering into any interesting subject all will be well
now all will be right no more complainings every body loves you i
only came to make my earliest court to you  were his condescending
words  and to sit and talk of twenty and twenty fond things as i used
to do and let every past disagreeable thing be forgotten as if nothing
had happened 

he understood me as beginning to hint at the disgrace of my
confinement no disgrace my dear can fall to your lot your reputation
is too well established i longed to see you repeated me i have seen
nobody half so amiable since i saw you last 

and again he kissed my cheek my glowing cheek for i was impatient 
i was vexed to be thus as i thought played upon and how could i be
thankful for a visit that it was now evident was only a too humble
artifice to draw me in against the next tuesday or to leave me
inexcusable to them all 

o my cunning brother this is his contrivance and then my anger made
me recollect the triumph in his and my sister's fondness for each other 
as practised before me and the mingled indignation flashing from their
eyes as arm-in-arm they spoke to me and the forced condescension
playing upon their lips when they called me clary and sister 

do you think i could with these reflections look upon my uncle
harlowe's visit as the favour he seemed desirous i should think it
to be indeed i could not and seeing him so studiously avoid all
recrimination as i may call it i gave into the affectation and
followed him in his talk of indifferent things while he seemed to
admire this thing and that as if he had never seen them before and
now-and then condescendingly kissed the hand that wrought some of the
things he fixed his eyes upon not so much to admire them as to find
subjects to divert what was most in his head and in my heart 

at his going away how can i leave you here by yourself my dear you 
whose company used to enliven us all you are not expected down indeed 
but i protest i had a good mind to surprise your father and mother if
i thought nothing would arise that would be disagreeable my dear 
my love  o the dear artful gentleman how could my uncle harlowe so
dissemble   what say you will you give me your hands will you see your
father can you stand his displeasure on first seeing the dear creature
who has given him and all of us so much disturbance can you promise
future 

he saw me rising in my temper nay my dear interrupting himself if
you cannot be all resignation i would not have you think of it 

my heart struggling between duty and warmth of temper was full you
know my dear i never could bear to be dealt meanly with how how can
you sir you my papa-uncle how can you sir the poor girl for i
could not speak with connexion 

nay my dear if you cannot be all duty all resignation better stay
where you are but after the instance you have given 

instance i have given what instance sir 

well well child better stay where you are if your past confinement
hangs so heavy upon you but now there will be a sudden end to
it adieu my dear three words only let your compliance be
sincere and love me as you used to love me your grandfather did not
do so much for you as i will do for you 

without suffering me to reply he hurried away as i thought like one
who has been employed to act a part against his will and was glad it
was over 


don't you see my dear miss howe how they are all determined have i
not reason to dread next tuesday 


up presently after came my sister to observe i suppose the way i was
in 

she found me in tears 

have you not a thomas a kempis sister with a stiff air 

i have madam 

madam how long are we to be at this distance clary 

no longer my dear bella if you allow me to call you sister and i took
her hand 

no fawning neither girl 

i withdrew my hand as hastily as you may believe i should have done 
had i in feeling for one of your parcels under the wood been bitten by
a viper 

i beg pardon said i too-too ready to make advances i am always
subjecting myself to contempts 

people who know not how to keep a middle behaviour said she must ever
do so 

i will fetch you the kempis sister i did here it is you will find
excellent things bella in that little book 

i wish retorted she you had profited by them 

i wish you may said i example from a sister older than one's self is a
fine thing 

older saucy little fool and away she flung 

what a captious old woman will my sister make if she lives to be
one demanding the reverence perhaps yet not aiming at the merit and
ashamed of the years that can only entitle her to the reverence 

it is plain from what i have related that they think they have got me
at some advantage by obtaining my consent to the interview but if it
were not betty's impertinence just now would make it evident she has
been complimenting me upon it and upon the visit of my uncle harlowe 
she says the difficulty now is more than half over with me she is
sure i would not see mr solmes but to have him now shall she be soon
better employed than of late she has been all hands will be at work 
she loves dearly to have weddings go forward who knows whose turn
will be next 

i found in the afternoon a reply to my answer to mr lovelace's letter 
it is full of promises full of vows of gratitude of eternal gratitude 
is his word among others still more hyperbolic yet mr lovelace the
least of any man whose letters i have seen runs into those elevated
absurdities i should be apt to despise him for it if he did such
language looks always to me as if the flatterer thought to find a woman
a fool or hoped to make her one 

he regrets my indifference to him which puts all the hope he has in my
favour upon the shocking usage i receive from my friends 

as to my charge upon him of unpoliteness and uncontroulableness what
 he asks  can he say since being unable absolutely to vindicate
himself he has too much ingenuousness to attempt to do so yet is
struck dumb by my harsh construction that his acknowledging temper
is owing more to his carelessness to defend himself than to his
inclination to amend he had never before met with the objections
against his morals which i had raised justly raised and he was
resolved to obviate them what is it he asks that he has promised but
reformation by my example and what occasion for the promise if he
had not faults and those very great ones to reform he hopes
acknowledgement of an error is no bad sign although my severe virtue
has interpreted it into one 

he believes i may be right severely right he calls it in my judgment
against making reprisals in the case of the intelligence he receives
from my family he cannot charge himself to be of a temper that leads
him to be inquisitive into any body's private affairs but hopes that
the circumstances of the case and the strange conduct of my friends 
will excuse him especially when so much depends upon his knowing the
movements of a family so violently bent by measures right or wrong to
carry their point against me in malice to him people he says who act
like angels ought to have angels to deal with for his part he has not
yet learned the difficult lesson of returning good for evil and shall
think himself the less encouraged to learn it by the treatment i have
met with from the very persons who would trample upon him as they do
upon me were he to lay himself under their feet 

he excuses himself for the liberties he owns he has heretofore taken in
ridiculing the marriage-state it is a subject he says that he has not
of late treated so lightly he owns it to be so trite so beaten a
topic with all libertines and witlings so frothy so empty so nothing
meaning so worn-out a theme that he is heartily ashamed of himself 
ever to have made it his he condemns it as a stupid reflection upon the
laws and good order of society and upon a man's own ancestors and
in himself who has some reason to value himself upon his descent
and alliances more censurable than in those who have not the same
advantages to boast of he promises to be more circumspect than ever 
both in his words and actions that he may be more and more worthy of
my approbation and that he may give an assurance before hand that a
foundation is laid in his mind for my example to work upon with equal
reputation and effect to us both if he may be so happy to call me his 

he gives me up as absolutely lost if i go to my uncle antony's the
close confinement the moated house the chapel the implacableness of
my brother and sister and their power over the rest of the family 
he sets forth in strong lights and plainly says that he must have a
struggle to prevent my being carried thither 

your kind your generous endeavours to interest your mother in my
behalf will i hope prevent those harsher extremities to which i might
be otherwise driven and to you i will fly if permitted and keep all
my promises of not corresponding with any body not seeing any body 
but by your mother's direction and yours 

i will close and deposit at this place it is not necessary to say how
much i am

your ever affectionate and obliged cl harlowe 




letter xxxii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


i am glad my papers are safe in your hands i will make it my endeavour
to deserve your good opinion that i may not at once disgrace your
judgment and my own heart 

i have another letter from mr lovelace he is extremely apprehensive of
the meeting i am to have with mr solmes to-morrow he says that the
airs that wretch gives himself on the occasion add to his concern and
it is with infinite difficulty that he prevails upon himself not to make
him a visit to let him know what he may expect if compulsion be used
towards me in his favour he assures me that solmes has actually talked
with tradesmen of new equipages and names the people in town with whom
he has treated that he has even'  was there ever such a horrid wretch  
allotted this and that apartment in his house for a nursery and other
offices 

how shall i bear to hear such a creature talk of love to me i shall be
out of all patience with him besides i thought that he did not dare
to make or talk of these impudent preparations so inconsistent as such
are with my brother's views but i fly the subject 

upon this confidence of solmes you will less wonder at that of
lovelace in pressing me in the name of all his family to escape
from so determined a violence as is intended to be offered to me at my
uncle's that the forward contriver should propose lord m s chariot and
six to be at the stile that leads up to the lonely coppice adjoining to
our paddock you will see how audaciously he mentions settlements ready
drawn horsemen ready to mount and one of his cousins montague to be
in the chariot or at the george in the neighbouring village waiting
to accompany me to lord m s or to lady betty's or lady sarah's or to
town as i please and upon such orders or conditions and under such
restrictions as to himself as i shall prescribe 

you will see how he threatens to watch and waylay them and to rescue
me as he calls it by an armed force of friends and servants if they
attempt to carry me against my will to my uncle's and this whether i
give my consent to the enterprise or not since he shall have no hopes
if i am once there 

o my dear friend who can think of these things and not be extremely
miserable in her apprehensions 

this mischievous sex what had i to do with any of them or they
with me i had deserved this were it by my own seeking by my own
giddiness that i had brought myself into this situation i wish with
all my heart but how foolish we are apt to wish when we find ourselves
unhappy and know not how to help ourselves 

on your mother's goodness however is my reliance if i can but avoid
being precipitated on either hand till my cousin morden arrives a
reconciliation must follow and all will be happy 

i have deposited a letter for mr lovelace in which i charge him as
he would not disoblige me for ever to avoid any rash step any visit to
mr solmes which may be followed by acts of violence 

i re-assure him that i will sooner die than be that man's wife 

whatever be my usage whatever shall be the result of the apprehended
interview i insist upon it that he presume not to offer violence to
any of my friends and express myself highly displeased that he should
presume upon such an interest in my esteem as to think himself entitled
to dispute my father's authority in my removal to my uncle's although i
tell him that i will omit neither prayers nor contrivance even to the
making myself ill to avoid going 

to-morrow is tuesday how soon comes upon us the day we dread oh that
a deep sleep of twenty four hours would seize my faculties but then
the next day would be tuesday as to all the effects and purposes for
which i so much dread it if this reach you before the event of the so
much apprehended interview can be known pray for

your clarissa harlowe 




letter xxxiii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe tuesday morning six o'clock 


the day is come i wish it were happily over i have had a wretched
night hardly a wink have i slept ruminating upon the approaching
interview the very distance of time to which they consented has added
solemnity to the meeting which otherwise it would not have had 

a thoughtful mind is not a blessing to be coveted unless it had such a
happy vivacity with it as yours a vivacity which enables a person to
enjoy the present without being over-anxious about the future 


tuesday eleven o'clock 

i have had a visit from my aunt hervey betty in her alarming way told
me i should have a lady to breakfast with me whom i little expected 
giving me to believe it was my mother this fluttered me so much on
hearing a lady coming up-stairs supposing it was she and not knowing
how to account for her motives in such a visit after i had been so long
banished from her presence that my aunt at her entrance took notice
of my disorder and after her first salutation 

why miss said she you seem surprised upon my word you thoughtful
young ladies have strange apprehensions about nothing at all what 
taking my hand can be the matter with you why my dear tremble 
tremble tremble at this rate you'll not be fit to be seen by any
body come my love kissing my cheek pluck up a courage by this
needless flutter on the approaching interview when it is over you will
judge of your other antipathies and laugh at yourself for giving way to
so apprehensive an imagination 

i said that whatever we strongly imagined was in its effect at the
time more than imaginary although to others it might not appear so 
that i had not rested one hour all night that the impertinent set over
me by giving me room to think my mother was coming up had so much
disconcerted me that i should be very little qualified to see any body
i disliked to see 

there was no accounting for these things she said mr solmes last
night supposed he should be under as much agitation as i could be 

who is it then madam that so reluctant an interview on both sides is
to please 

both of you my dear i hope after the first flurries are over the
most apprehensive beginnings i have often known make the happiest
conclusions 

there can be but one happy conclusion to the intended visit and that
is that both sides may be satisfied it will be the last 

she then represented how unhappy it would be for me if i did not suffer
myself to be prevailed upon she pressed me to receive mr solmes
as became my education and declared that his apprehensions on the
expectation he had of seeing me were owing to his love and his awe 
intimating that true love is ever accompanied by fear and reverence 
and that no blustering braving lover could deserve encouragement 

to this i answered that constitution was to be considered that a
man of spirit would act like one and could do nothing meanly that
a creeping mind would creep into every thing where it had a view to
obtain a benefit by it and insult where it had power and nothing to
expect that this was not a point now to be determined with me that
i had said as much as i could possibly say on the subject that this
interview was imposed upon me by those indeed who had a right to
impose it but that it was sorely against my will complied with and for
this reason that there was aversion not wilfulness in the case and
so nothing could come of it but a pretence as i much apprehended to
use me still more severely than i had been used 

she was then pleased to charge me with prepossession and prejudice she
expatiated upon the duty of a child she imputed to me abundance of fine
qualities but told me that in this case that of persuadableness was
wanting to crown all she insisted upon the merit of obedience although
my will were not in it from a little hint i gave of my still greater
dislike to see mr solmes on account of the freedom i had treated him
with she talked to me of his forgiving disposition of his infinite
respect for me and i cannot tell what of this sort 

i never found myself so fretful in my life and so i told my aunt and
begged her pardon for it but she said it was well disguised then for
she saw nothing but little tremors which were usual with young ladies
when they were to see their admirers for the first time and this might
be called so with respect to me since it was the first time i had
consented to see mr solmes in that light but that the next 

how madam interrupted i is it then imagined that i give this meeting
on that footing 

to be sure it is child 

to be sure it is madam then i do yet desire to decline it i will
not i cannot see him if he expects me to see him upon those terms 

niceness punctilio mere punctilio niece can you think that your
appointment day place hour and knowing what the intent of it was 
is to be interpreted away as a mere ceremony and to mean nothing let
me tell you my dear your father mother uncles every body respect
this appointment as the first act of your compliance with their wills 
and therefore recede not i desire you but make a merit of what cannot
be avoided 

o the hideous wretch pardon me madam i to be supposed to meet
such a man as that with such a view and he to be armed with such an
expectation but it cannot be that he expects it whatever others may
do it is plain he cannot by the fears he tell you all he shall have
to see me if his hope were so audacious he could not fear so much 

indeed he has this hope and justly founded too but his fear arises
from his reverence as i told you before 

his reverence his unworthiness tis so apparent that even he
himself sees it as well as every body else hence his offers
to purchase me hence it is that settlements are to make up for
acknowledged want of merit 

his unworthiness say you not so fast my dear does not this look
like setting a high value upon yourself we all have exalted notions of
your merit niece but nevertheless it would not be wrong if you were
to arrogate less to yourself though more were to be your due than your
friends attribute to you 

i am sorry madam it should be thought arrogance in me to suppose i am
not worthy of a better man than mr solmes both as to person and mind 
and as to fortune i thank god i despise all that can be insisted upon
in his favour from so poor a plea 

she told me it signified nothing to talk i knew the expectation of
every one 

indeed i did not it was impossible i could think of such a strange
expectation upon a compliance made only to shew i would comply in all
that was in my power to comply with 

i might easily she said have supposed that every one thought i was
beginning to oblige them all by the kind behaviour of my brother and
sister to me in the garden last sunday by my sister's visit to me
afterwards in my chamber although both more stiffly received by me 
than were either wished or expected by my uncle harlowe's affectionate
visit to me the same afternoon not indeed so very gratefully received
as i used to receive his favours but this he kindly imputed to the
displeasure i had conceived at my confinement and to my intention to
come off by degrees that i might keep myself in countenance for my past
opposition 

see my dear the low cunning of that sunday-management which then
so much surprised me and see the reason why dr lewen was admitted to
visit me yet forbore to enter upon a subject about which i thought he
came to talk to me for it seems there was no occasion to dispute with
me on the point i was to be supposed to have conceded to see also 
how unfairly my brother and sister must have represented their pretended
kindness when though the had an end to answer by appearing kind their
antipathy to me seems to have been so strong that they could not help
insulting me by their arm-in-arm lover-like behaviour to each other as
my sister afterwards likewise did when she came to borrow my kempis 

i lifted up my hands and eyes i cannot said i give this treatment a
name the end so unlikely to be answered by means so low i know whose
the whole is he that could get my uncle harlowe to contribute his part 
and to procure the acquiescence of the rest of my friends to it must
have the power to do any thing with them against me 

again my aunt told me that talking and invective now i had given the
expectation would signify nothing she hoped i would not shew every
one that they had been too forward in their constructions of my desire
to oblige them she could assure me that it would be worse for me if
now i receded than if i had never advanced 

advanced madam how can you say advanced why this is a trick upon
me a poor low trick pardon me madam i don't say you have a hand in
it but my dearest aunt tell me will not my mother be present at
this dreaded interview will she not so far favour me were it but to
qualify 

qualify my dear interrupted she your mother and your uncle harlowe
would not be present on this occasion for the world 

o then madam how can they look upon my consent to this interview as an
advance 

my aunt was displeased at this home-push miss clary said she there is
no dealing with you it would be happy for you and for every body else 
were your obedience as ready as your wit i will leave you 

not in anger i hope madam interrupted i all i meant was to observe 
that let the meeting issue as it may and as it must issue it cannot be
a disappointment to any body 

o miss you seem to be a very determined young creature mr solmes
will be here at your time and remember once more that upon the coming
afternoon depend upon the peace of your whole family and your own
happiness 

and so saying down she hurried 

here i will stop in what way i shall resume or when is not left to
me to conjecture much less determine i am excessively uneasy no good
news from your mother i doubt i will deposit thus far for fear of
the worst 

adieu my best rather my only friend cl harlowe 




letter xxxiv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe tuesday evening and continued
through the night 

well my dear i am alive and here but how long i shall be either
here or alive i cannot say i have a vast deal to write and perhaps
shall have little time for it nevertheless i must tell you how the
saucy betty again discomposed me when she came up with this solmes's
message although as you will remember from my last i was in a way
before that wanted no additional surprises 

miss miss miss cried she as fast as she could speak with her arms
spread abroad and all her fingers distended and held up will you be
pleased to walk down into your own parlour there is every body i will
assure you in full congregation and there is mr solmes as fine as a
lord with a charming white peruke fine laced shirt and ruffles coat
trimmed with silver and a waistcoat standing on end with lace quite
handsome believe me you never saw such an alteration ah miss 
shaking her head tis pity you have said so much against him but you
will know how to come off for all that i hope it will not be too late 

impertinence said i wert thou bid to come up in this fluttering
way and i took up my fan and fanned myself 

bless me said she how soon these fine young ladies will be put into
flusterations i mean not either to offend or frighten you i am
sure 

every body there do you say who do you call every body 

why miss holding out her left palm opened and with a flourish and
a saucy leer patting it with the fore finger of the other at every
mentioned person there is your papa there is your mamma there is
your uncle harlowe there is your uncle antony your aunt hervey my
young lady and my young master and mr solmes with the air of a
great courtier standing up because he named you mrs betty said he 
 then the ape of a wench bowed and scraped as awkwardly as i suppose
the person did whom she endeavoured to imitate   pray give my humble
service to miss and tell her i wait her commands 

was not this a wicked wench i trembled so i could hardly stand i was
spiteful enough to say that her young mistress i supposed bid her put
on these airs to frighten me out of a capacity of behaving so calmly as
should procure me my uncles' compassion 

what a way do you put yourself in miss said the insolent come dear
madam taking up my fan which i had laid down and approaching me with
it fanning shall i 

none of thy impertinence but say you all my friends are below with
him and am i to appear before them all 

i can't tell if they'll stay when you come i think they seemed to be
moving when mr solmes gave me his orders but what answer shall i
carry to the squire 

say i can't go but yet when tis over tis over say i'll wait
upon i'll attend i'll come presently say anything i care not
what but give me my fan and fetch me a glass of water 

she went and i fanned myself all the time for i was in a flame and
hemmed and struggled with myself all i could and when she returned 
drank my water and finding no hope presently of a quieter heart i sent
her down and followed her with precipitation trembling so that had
i not hurried i question if i could have got down at all oh my dear 
what a poor passive machine is the body when the mind is disordered 

there are two doors to my parlour as i used to call it as i entered
one my friends hurried out the other i just saw the gown of my sister 
the last who slid away my uncle antony went out with them but he staid
not long as you shall hear and they all remained in the next parlour 
a wainscot partition only parting the two i remember them both in one 
but they were separated in favour of us girls for each to receive her
visitors in at her pleasure 

mr solmes approached me as soon as i entered cringing to the ground 
a visible confusion in every feature of his face after half a dozen
choaked-up madams he was very sorry he was very much concerned it
was his misfortune and there he stopped being unable presently to
complete a sentence 

this gave me a little more presence of mind cowardice in a foe begets
courage in one's self i see that plainly now yet perhaps at bottom 
the new-made bravo is a greater coward than the other 

i turned from him and seated myself in one of the fireside chairs 
fanning myself i have since recollected that i must have looked
very saucily could i have had any thoughts of the man i should have
despised myself for it but what can be said in the case of an aversion
so perfectly sincere 

he hemmed five or six times as i had done above and these produced a
sentence that i could not but see his confusion this sentence produced
two or three more i believe my aunt had been his tutoress for it was
his awe his reverence for so superlative a lady  i assure you   and he
hoped he hoped three times he hoped before he told me what at
last it came out that i was too generous generosity he said was my
character to despise him for such for such for such true tokens of
his love 

i do indeed see you under some confusion sir and this gives me hope 
that although i have been compelled as i may call it to give way
to this interview it may be attended with happier effects than i had
apprehended from it 

he had hemmed himself into more courage 

you could not madam imagine any creature so blind to your merits 
and so little attracted by them as easily to forego the interest and
approbation he was honoured with by your worthy family while he had
any hope given him that one day he might by his perseverance and zeal 
expect your favour 

i am but too much aware sir that it is upon the interest and
approbation you mention that you build such hope it is impossible
otherwise that a man who has any regard for his own happiness would
persevere against such declarations as i have made and think myself
obliged to make in justice to you as well as to myself 

he had seen many instances he told me and had heard of more where
ladies had seemed as averse and yet had been induced some by motives
of compassion others by persuasion of friends to change their minds 
and had been very happy afterwards and he hoped this might be the case
here 

i have no notion sir of compliment in an article of such importance
as this yet i am sorry to be obliged to speak my mind so plainly as i
am going to do know then that i have invincible objections sir to
your address i have avowed them with an earnestness that i believe is
without example and why because i believe it is without example that
any young creature circumstanced as i am was ever treated as i have
been treated on your account 

it is hoped madam that your consent may in time be obtained that is
the hope and i shall be a miserable man if it cannot 

better sir give me leave to say you were miserable by yourself than
that you should make two so 

you may have heard madam things to my disadvantage no man is without
enemies be pleased to let me know what you have heard and i will
either own my faults and amend or i will convince you that i am basely
bespattered and once i understand you overheard something that i should
say that gave you offence unguardedly perhaps but nothing but what
shewed my value and that i would persist so long as i have hope 

i have indeed heard many things to your disadvantage and i was far
from being pleased with what i overheard fall from your lips but as you
were not any thing to me and never could be it was not for me to be
concerned about the one or the other 

i am sorry madam to hear this i am sure you should not tell me of my
fault that i would be unwilling to correct in myself 

then sir correct this fault do not wish to have a young creature
compelled in the most material article of her life for the sake of
motives she despises and in behalf of a person she cannot value one
that has in her own right sufficient to set her above all your offers 
and a spirit that craves no more than what it has to make itself easy
and happy 

i don't see madam how you would be happy if i were to discontinue my
address for 

that is nothing to you sir interrupted i do you but withdraw your
pretensions and if it will be thought fit to start up another man for
my punishment the blame will not lie at your door you will be entitled
to my thanks and most heartily will i thank you 

he paused and seemed a little at a loss and i was going to give him
still stronger and more personal instances of my plain-dealing when in
came my uncle antony 

so niece so sitting in state like a queen giving audience haughty
audience mr solmes why stand you thus humbly why this distance 
man i hope to see you upon a more intimate footing before we part 

i arose as soon as he entered and approached him with a bend knee let
me sir reverence my uncle whom i have not for so long time seen let
me sir bespeak your favour and compassion 

you will have the favour of every body niece when you know how to
deserve it 

if ever i deserved it i deserve it now i have been hardly used i
have made proposals that ought to be accepted and such as would not
have been asked of me what have i done that i must be banished and
confined thus disgracefully that i must not be allowed to have any
free-will in an article that concerns my present and future happiness 

miss clary replied my uncle you have had your will in every thing till
now and this makes your parents' will sit so heavy upon you 

my will sir be pleased to allow me to ask what was my will till now 
but my father's will and yours and my uncle harlowe's will has it not
been my pride to obey and oblige i never asked a favour that i did
not first sit down and consider if it were fit to be granted and now 
to shew my obedience have i not offered to live single have i not
offered to divest myself of my grandfather's bounty and to cast myself
upon my father's and that to be withdrawn whenever i disoblige him 
why dear good sir am i to be made unhappy in a point so concerning my
happiness 

your grandfather's estate is not wished from you you are not desired
to live a single life you know our motives and we guess at yours and 
let me tell you well as we love you we should much sooner choose to
follow you to the grave than that yours should take place 

i will engage never to marry any man without my father's consent and
yours sir and every body's did i ever give you cause to doubt my
word and here i will take the solemnest oath that can be offered me 

that is the matrimonial one interrupted he with a big voice and to
this gentleman it shall it shall cousin clary and the more you
oppose it the worse it shall be for you 

this and before the man who seemed to assume courage upon it highly
provoked me 

then sir you shall sooner follow me to the grave indeed i will
undergo the cruelest death i will even consent to enter into that awful
vault of my ancestors and have that bricked up upon me rather than
consent to be miserable for life and mr solmes turning to him take
notice of what i say this or any death i will sooner undergo  that
will quickly be over  than be yours and for ever unhappy 

my uncle was in a terrible rage upon this he took mr solmes by the
hand shocked as the man seemed to be and drew him to the window don't
be surprised mr solmes don't be concerned at this we know and rapt
out a sad oath what women will say in their wrath the wind is not more
boisterous nor more changeable and again he swore to that if you
think it worthwhile to wait for such an ungrateful girl as this i'll
engage she'll veer about i'll engage she shall and a third time
violently swore to it 

then coming up to me who had thrown myself very much disordered by my
vehemence into the most distant window as if he would have beat me 
his face violently working his hands clinched and his teeth set yes 
yes yes you shall cousin clary be mr solmes's wife we will see
that you shall and this in one week at farthest and then a fourth
time he confirmed it poor gentleman how he swore 

i am sorry sir said i to see you in such a passion all this i am
but too sensible is owing to my brother's instigation who would not
himself give the instance of duty that is sought to be exacted from me 
it is best for me to withdraw i shall but provoke you farther i fear 
for although i would gladly obey you if i could yet this is a point
determined with me and i cannot so much as wish to get over it 

how could i avoid making these strong declarations the man in presence 

i was going out at the door i came in at the gentlemen looking upon one
another as if referring to each other what to do or whether to engage
my stay or suffer me to go and whom should i meet at the door but my
brother who had heard all that had passed 

he bolted upon me so unexpectedly that i was surprised he took my
hand and grasped it with violence return pretty miss said he 
return if you please you shall not yet be bricked up your instigating
brother shall save you from that o thou fallen angel said he peering
up to my downcast face such a sweetness here and such an obstinacy
there tapping my neck o thou true woman though so young but you
shall not have your rake remember that in a loud whisper as if he
would be decently indecent before the man you shall be redeemed and
this worthy gentleman raising his voice will be so good as to redeem
you from ruin and hereafter you will bless him or have reason to bless
him for his condescension that was the brutal brother's word 

he had led me up to meet mr solmes whose hand he took as he held
mine here sir said he take the rebel daughter's hand i give it you
now she shall confirm the gift in a week's time or will have neither
father mother nor uncles to boast of 

i snatched my hand away 

how now miss 

and how now sir what right have you to dispose of my hand if you
govern every body else you shall not govern me especially in a point
so immediately relative to myself and in which you neither have nor
ever shall have any thing to do 

i would have broken from him but he held my hand too fast 

let me go sir why am i thus treated you design i doubt not with
your unmanly gripings to hurt me as you do but again i ask wherefore
is it that i am to be thus treated by you 

he tossed my hand from him with a whirl that pained my very shoulder i
wept and held my other hand to the part 

mr solmes blamed him so did my uncle 

he had no patience he said with such a perverse one and to think of
the reflections upon himself before he entered he had only given me
back the hand i had not deserved he should touch it was one of my arts
to pretend to be so pained 

mr solmes said he would sooner give up all his hopes of me than that
i should be used unkindly and he offered to plead in my behalf to them
both and applied himself with a bow as if for my approbation of his
interposition 

interpose not mr solmes said i to save me from my brother's
violence i cannot wish to owe an obligation to a man whose ungenerous
perseverance is the occasion of that violence and of all my disgraceful
sufferings 

how generous in you mr solmes said my brother to interpose so kindly
in behalf of such an immovable spirit i beg of you to persist in your
address the unnatural brother called it address for all our family's
sake and for her sake too if you love her persist let us save her 
if possible from ruining herself look at her person  and he gazed at
me from head to foot pointing at me as he referred to mr solmes  
think of her fine qualities all the world confesses them and we all
gloried in her till now she is worth saving and after two or three
more struggles she will be yours and take my word for it will reward
your patience talk not therefore of giving up your hopes for a
little whining folly she has entered upon a parade which she knows
not how to quit with a female grace you have only her pride and her
obstinacy to encounter and depend upon it you will be as happy a man
in a fortnight as a married man can be 

you have heard me say my dear that my brother has always taken a
liberty to reflect upon our sex and upon matrimony he would not if
he did not think it wit to do so just as poor mr wyerley and others 
whom we both know profane and ridicule scripture and all to evince
their pretensions to the same pernicious talent and to have it thought
they are too wise to be religious 

mr solmes with a self-satisfied air presumptuously said he would
suffer every thing to oblige my family and to save me and doubted not
to be amply rewarded could he be so happy as to succeed at last 

mr solmes said i if you have any regard for your own happiness mine
is out of the question with you you have not generosity enough to make
that any part of your scheme prosecute no father your address as my
brother calls it it is but too just to tell you that i could not bring
my heart so much as to think of you without the utmost disapprobation 
before i was used as i have been and can you think i am such a slave 
such a poor slave as to be brought to change my mind by the violent
usage i have met with 

and you sir turning to my brother if you think that meekness always
indicates tameness and that there is no magnanimity without bluster 
own yourself mistaken for once for you shall have reason to judge from
henceforth that a generous mind is not to be forced and that 

no more said the imperious wretch i charge you lifting up his hands
and eyes then turning to my uncle do you hear sir this is your once
faultless niece this is your favourite 

mr solmes looked as if he know not what to think of the matter and had
i been left alone with him i saw plainly i could have got rid of him
easily enough 

my uncle came to me looking up also to my face and down to my feet 
and is it possible this can be you all this violence from you miss
clary 

yes it is possible sir and i will presume to say this vehemence on
my side is but the natural consequence of the usage i have met with and
the rudeness i am treated with even in your presence by a brother who
has no more right to controul me than i have to controul him 

this usage cousin clary was not till all other means were tried with
you 

tried to what end sir do i contend for any thing more than a mere
negative you may sir  turning to mr solmes   possibly you may be
induced the rather to persevere thus ungenerously as the usage i have
met with for your sake and what you have now seen offered to me by my
brother will shew you what i can bear were my evil destiny ever to
make me yours 

lord madam cried solmes  all this time distorted into twenty
different attitudes as my brother and my uncle were blessing
themselves and speaking only to each other by their eyes and by their
working features lord madam   what a construction is this 

a fair construction sir interrupted i for he that can see a person 
whom he pretends to value thus treated and approve of it must be
capable of treating her thus himself and that you do approve of it 
is evident by your declared perseverance when you know i am confined 
banished and insulted in order to make me consent to be what i never
can be and this let me tell you as i have often told others not from
motives of obstinacy but aversion 

excuse me sir turning to my uncle to you as to my father's brother 
i owe duty i beg your pardon but my brother he shall not constrain
me and  turning to the unnatural wretch i will call him wretch  knit
your brows sir and frown all you will i will ask you would you in
my case make the sacrifices i am willing to make to obtain every one's
favour if not what right have you to treat me thus and to procure me
to be treated as i have been for so long a time past 

i had put myself by this time into great disorder they were silent and
seemed by their looks to want to talk to one another walking about in
violent disorders too between whiles i sat down fanning myself as
it happened against the glass and i could perceive my colour go and
come and being sick to the very heart and apprehensive of fainting i
rung 

betty came in i called for a glass of water and drank it but nobody
minded me i heard my brother pronounce the words art female art 
to solmes which together with the apprehension that he would not be
welcome i suppose kept him back else i could see the man was affected 
and still fearing i should faint i arose and taking hold of betty's
arm let me hold by you betty said i let me withdraw and moved
with trembling feet towards the door and then turned about and made a
courtesy to my uncle permit me sir said i to withdraw 

whither go you niece said my uncle we have not done with you yet 
i charge you depart not mr solmes has something to open to you that
will astonish you and you shall hear it 

only sir by your leave for a few minutes into the air i will return 
if you command it i will hear all that i am to hear that it may be
over now and for ever you will go with me betty 

and so without any farther prohibition i retired into the garden and
there casting myself upon the first seat and throwing betty's apron
over my face leaning against her side my hands between hers i gave
way to a violent burst of grief or passion or both which as it
seemed saved my heart from breaking for i was sensible of an immediate
relief 

i have already given you specimens of mrs betty's impertinence i shall
not therefore trouble you with more for the wench notwithstanding
this my distress took great liberties with me after she saw me a
little recovered and as i walked farther into the garden insomuch
that i was obliged to silence her by an absolute prohibition of saying
another word to me and then she dropped behind me sullen and gloomy 

it was near an hour before i was sent for in again the messenger was
my cousin dolly hervey who with an eye of compassion and respect for
miss hervey always loved me and calls herself my scholar as you know 
told my company was desired 

betty left us 

who commands my attendance miss said i have you not been in tears my
dear 

who can forbid tears said she 

why what is the matter cousin dolly sure nobody is entitled to weep
in this family but me 

yes i am madam said she because i love you 

i kissed her and is it for me my sweet cousin that you shed
tears there never was love lost between us but tell me what is
designed to be done with me that i have this kind instance of your
compassion for me 

you must take no notice of what i tell you said the dear girl but my
mamma has been weeping for you too with me but durst not let any body
see it o my dolly said my mamma there never was so set a malice
in man as in your cousin james harlowe they will ruin the flower and
ornament of their family 

as how miss dolly did she not explain herself as how my dear 

yes she said mr solmes would have given up his claim to you for he
said you hated him and there were no hopes and your mamma was willing
he should and to have you taken at your word to renounce mr lovelace
and to live single my mamma was for it too for they heard all that
passed between you and uncle antony and cousin james saying it was
impossible to think of prevailing upon you to have mr solmes uncle
harlowe seemed in the same way of thinking at least my mamma says he
did not say any thing to the contrary but your papa was immovable and
was angry at your mamma and mine upon it and hereupon your brother 
your sister and my uncle antony joined in and changed the scene
entirely in short she says that mr solmes had great matters engaged
to him he owned that you were the finest young lady in england and
he would be content to be but little beloved if he could not after
marriage engage your heart for the sake of having the honour to call
you his but for one twelvemonth i suppose he would break your heart the
next for he is a cruel-hearted man i am sure 

my friends may break my heart cousin dolly but mr solmes will never
have it in his power to break it 

i do not know that miss you will have good luck to avoid having him 
by what i can find for my mamma says they are all now of one mind 
herself excepted and she is forced to be silent your papa and brother
are both so outrageous 

i am got above minding my brother cousin dolly he is but my brother 
but to my father i owe duty and obedience if i could comply 

we are apt to be fond of any body that will side with us when oppressed
or provoked i always loved my cousin dolly but now she endeared
herself to me ten times more by her soothing concern for me i asked
what she would do were she in my case 

without hesitation she replied have mr lovelace out of hand and take
up her own estate if she were me and there would be an end to it and
mr lovelace she said was a fine gentleman mr solmes was not worthy
to buckle his shoes 

miss hervey told me further that her mother was desired to come to me 
to fetch me in but she excused herself i should have all my friends 
she said she believed sit in judgment upon me 

i wish it had been so but as i have been told since neither my father
for my mother would trust themselves with seeing me the one it seems
for passion sake my mother for tender considerations 

by this time we entered the house miss accompanied me into the parlour 
and left me as a person devoted i then thought 

nobody was there i sat down and had leisure to weep reflecting upon
what my cousin dolly had told me 

they were all in my sister's parlour adjoining for i heard a confused
mixture of voices some louder than others which drowned the more
compassionating accents 

female accents i could distinguish the drowned ones to be o my dear 
what a hard-hearted sex is the other children of the same parents how
came they by their cruelty do they get it by travel do they get
it by conversation with one another or how do they get it yet my
sister too is as hard-hearted as any of them but this may be no
exception neither for she has been thought to be masculine in her air
and her spirit she has then perhaps a soul of the other sex in a body
of ours and so for the honour of our own will i judge of every
woman for the future who imitating the rougher manners of men acts
unbeseeming the gentleness of her own sex 

forgive me my dear friend for breaking into my story by these
reflections were i rapidly to pursue my narration without thinking 
without reflecting i believe i should hardly be able to keep in my
right mind since vehemence and passion would then be always uppermost 
but while i think as i write i cool and my hurry of spirits is
allayed 

i believe i was about a quarter of an hour enjoying my own comfortless
contemplations before any body came in to me for they seemed to be
in full debate my aunt looked in first o my dear said she are you
there and withdrew hastily to apprize them of it 

and then as agreed upon i suppose in came my uncle antony crediting
mr solmes with the words let me lead you in my dear friend having
hold of his hand while the new-made beau awkwardly followed but more
edgingly as i may say setting his feet mincingly to avoid treading
upon his leader's heels excuse me my dear this seeming levity but
those we do not love appear in every thing ungraceful to us 

i stood up my uncle looked very surly sit down sit down girl 
said he and drawing a chair near me he placed his dear friend in it 
whether he would or not i having taken my seat and my uncle sat on the
other side of me 

well niece taking my hand we shall have very little more to say to
you than we have already said as to the subject that is so distasteful
to you unless indeed you have better considered of the matter and
first let me know if you have 

the matter wants no consideration sir 

very well very well madam said my uncle withdrawing his hands from
mine could i ever have thought of this from you 

for god's sake dearest madam said mr solmes folding his hands and
there he stopped 

for god's sake what sir how came god's sake and your sake i pray
you to be the same 

this silenced him my uncle could only be angry and that he was before 

well well well mr solmes said my uncle no more of supplication 
you have not confidence enough to expect a woman's favour 

he then was pleased to hint what great things he had designed to do for
me and that it was more for my sake after he returned from the indies 
than for the sake of any other of the family that he had resolved
to live a single life but now concluded he that the perverse girl
despises all the great things it was once as much in my will as it is
in my power to do for her i will change my measures 

i told him that i most sincerely thanked him for all his kind
intentions to me but that i was willing to resign all claim to any
other of his favours than kind looks and kind words 

he looked about him this way and that 

mr solmes looked pitifully down 

but both being silent i was sorry i added that i had too much reason
to say a very harsh thing as i might be thought which was that if
he would but be pleased to convince my brother and sister that he was
absolutely determined to alter his generous purposes towards me 
it might possibly procure me better treatment from both than i was
otherwise likely to have 

my uncle was very much displeased but he had not the opportunity to
express his displeasure as he seemed preparing to do for in came my
brother in exceeding great wrath and called me several vile names his
success hitherto in his device against me had set him above keeping
even decent measures 

was this my spiteful construction he asked was this the interpretation
i put upon his brotherly care of me and concern for me in order to
prevent my ruining myself 

it is indeed it is said i i know no other way to account for your
late behaviour to me and before your face i repeat my request to my
uncle and i will make it to my other uncle whenever i am permitted to
see him that they will confer all their favours upon you and upon my
sister and only make me happy it is all i wish for in their kind
looks and kind words 

how they all gazed upon one another but could i be less peremptory
before the man 

and as to your care and concern for me sir turning to my brother 
once more i desire it not you are but my brother my father and mother 
i bless god are both living and were they not you have given me
abundant reason to say that you are the very last person i would wish
to have any concern for me 

how niece and is a brother an only brother of so little
consideration with you as this comes to and ought he to have no
concern for his sister's honour and the family's honour 

my honour sir i desire none of his concern for that it never was
endangered till it had his undesired concern forgive me sir but when
my brother knows how to act like a brother or behave like a gentleman 
he may deserve more consideration from me than it is possible for me now
to think he does 

i thought my brother would have beat me upon this but my uncle stood
between us 

violent girl however he called me who said he who would have
thought it of her 

then was mr solmes told that i was unworthy of his pursuit 

but mr solmes warmly took my part he could not bear he said that i
should be treated so roughly 

and so very much did he exert himself on this occasion and so patiently
was his warmth received by my brother that i began to suspect that it
was a contrivance to make me think myself obliged to him and that this
might perhaps be one end of the pressed-for interview 

the very suspicion of this low artifice violent as i was thought to be
before put me still more out of patience and my uncle and my brother
again praising his wonderful generosity and his noble return of good
for evil you are a happy man mr solmes said i that you can
so easily confer obligations upon a whole family except upon one
ungrateful person of it whom you seem to intend most to oblige but
who being made unhappy by your favour desires not to owe to you any
protection from the violence of a brother 

then was i a rude an ungrateful and unworthy creature 

i own it all all all you can call me or think me brother do i own 
i own my unworthiness with regard to this gentleman i take your word
for his abundant merit which i have neither leisure nor inclination to
examine into it may perhaps be as great as your own but yet i cannot
thank him for his great mediation for who sees not looking at my
uncle that this is giving himself a merit with every body at my
expense 

then turning to my brother who seemed surprised into silence by my
warmth i must also acknowledge sir the favour of your superabundant
care for me but i discharge you of it at least while i have the
happiness of nearer and dearer relations you have given me no reason to
think better of your prudence than of my own i am independent of you 
sir though i never desire to be so of my father and although i wish
for the good opinion of my uncles it is all i wish for from them and
this sir i repeat to make you and my sister easy 

instantly almost came in betty in a great hurry looking at me as
spitefully as if she were my sister sir said she to my brother my
master desires to speak with you this moment at the door 

he went to that which led into my sister's parlour and this sentence
i heard thundered from the mouth of one who had a right to all my
reverence son james let the rebel be this moment carried away to my
brother's this very moment she shall not stay one hour more under my
roof 

i trembled i was ready to sink yet not knowing what i did or said i
flew to the door and would have opened it but my brother pulled it to 
and held it close by the key o my papa my dear papa said i falling
upon my knees at the door admit your child to your presence let me
but plead my cause at your feet oh reprobate not thus your distressed
daughter 

my uncle put his handkerchief to his eyes mr solmes made a still more
grievous face than he had before but my brother's marble heart was
untouched 

i will not stir from my knees continued i without admission at this
door i beg it oh let it be the door of mercy and open it to me 
honoured sir i beseech you but this once this once although you
were afterwards to shut it against me for ever 

the door was endeavoured to be opened on the inside which made my
brother let go the key on a sudden and i pressing against it all
the time remaining on my knees fell flat on my face into the other
parlour however without hurting myself but every body was gone except
betty who i suppose was the person that endeavoured to open the door 
she helped to raise me up and when i was on my feet i looked round
that apartment and seeing nobody there re-entered the other leaning
upon her and then threw myself into the chair which i had sat in
before and my eyes overflowed to my great relief while my uncle
antony my brother and mr solmes left me and went to my other
relations 

what passed among them i know not but my brother came in by the time
i had tolerably recovered myself with a settled and haughty gloom upon
his brow your father and mother command you instantly to prepare for
your uncle antony's you need not be solicitous about what you shall
take with you you may give betty your keys take them betty if the
perverse one has them about her and carry them to her mother she will
take care to send every thing after you that you shall want but another
night you will not be permitted to stay in this house 

i don't choose to give my keys to any body except to my mother and
into her own hands you see how much i am disordered it may cost me
my life to be hurried away so suddenly i beg to be indulged till next
monday at least 

that will not be granted you so prepare for this very very night 
and give up your keys give them to me miss i'll carry them to your
mother 

excuse me brother indeed i won't 

indeed you must have you any thing you are afraid should be seen by
your mother 

not if i be permitted to attend her 

i'll make a report accordingly 

he went out 

in came miss dolly hervey i am sorry madam to be the messenger but
your mamma insists upon your sending up all the keys of your cabinet 
library and drawers 

tell my mother that i yield them up to her commands tell her i
make no conditions with my mother but if she finds nothing she shall
disapprove of i beg that she will permit me to tarry here a few days
longer try my dolly  the dear girl sobbing with grief   try if your
gentleness cannot prevail for me 

she wept still more and said it is sad very sad to see matters thus
carried 

she took the keys and wrapped her arms about me and begged me to
excuse her for her message and would have said more but betty's
presence awed her as i saw 

don't pity me my dear said i it will be imputed to you as a fault 
you see who is by 

the insolent wench scornfully smiled one young lady pitying another
in things of this nature looks promising in the youngest i must needs
say 

i bid her begone from my presence 

she would most gladly go she said were she not to stay about me by my
mother's order 

it soon appeared for what she staid for i offering to go up stairs to
my apartment when my cousin went from me with the keys she told me she
was commanded to her very great regret she must own to desire me not
to go up at present 

such a bold face as she i told her should not hinder me 

she instantly rang the bell and in came my brother meeting me at the
door 

return return miss no going up yet 

i went in again and throwing myself upon the window-seat wept
bitterly 

shall i give you the particulars of a ridiculously-spiteful conversation
that passed between my brother and me in the time that he with
betty was in office to keep me in the parlour while my closet was
searching but i think i will not it can answer no good end 

i desired several times while he staid to have leave to retire to my
apartment but was denied the search i suppose was not over 

bella was one of those employed in it they could not have a more
diligent searcher how happy it was they were disappointed 

but when my sister could not find the cunning creature's papers i was
to stand another visit from mr solmes preceded now by my aunt hervey 
solely against her will i could see that accompanied by my uncle
antony in order to keep her steady i suppose 

but being a little heavy for it is now past two in the morning i
will lie down in my clothes to indulge the kind summons if it will be
indulged 


three o'clock wednesday morning 

i could not sleep only dozed away one half-hour 

my aunt hervey accosted me thus o my dear child what troubles do you
give to your parents and to every body i wonder at you 

i am sorry for it madam 

sorry for it child why then so very obstinate come sit down my
dear i will sit next to you taking my hand 

my uncle placed mr solmes on the other side of me himself over-against
me almost close to me was i not finely beset my dear 

your brother child said my aunt is too passionate his zeal for your
welfare pushes him on a little too vehemently 

very true said my uncle but no more of this we would now be glad to
see if milder means will do with you though indeed they were tried
before 

i asked my aunt if it were necessary that the gentleman should be
present 

there is a reason that he should said my aunt as you will hear by-and
by but i must tell you first that thinking you was a little too
angrily treated by your brother your mother desired me to try what
gentler means would do upon a spirit so generous as we used to think
yours 

nothing can be done madam i must presume to say if this gentleman's
address be the end 

she looked upon my uncle who bit his lip and looked upon mr solmes 
who rubbed his cheek and shaking her head good dear creature said
she be calm let me ask you if something would have been done had you
been more gently used than you seem to think you have been 

no madam i cannot say it would in this gentleman's favour you
know madam you know sir to my uncle i ever valued myself upon my
sincerity and once indeed had the happiness to be valued for it 

my uncle took mr solmes aside i heard him say whispering she must 
she shall still be yours we'll see who'll conquer parents or child 
uncles or niece i doubt not to be witness to all this being got over 
and many a good-humoured jest made of this high phrensy 

i was heartily vexed 

though we cannot find out continued he yet we guess who puts her upon
this obstinate behaviour it is not natural to her man nor would i
concern myself so much about her but that i know what i say to be true 
and intend to do great things for her 

i will hourly pray for that happy time whispered as audibly mr solmes 
i never will revive the remembrance of what is now so painful to me 

well but niece i am to tell you said my aunt that the sending up
of the keys without making any conditions has wrought for you what
nothing else could have done that and the not finding any thing that
could give them umbrage together with mr solmes's interposition 

o madam let me not owe an obligation to mr solmes i cannot repay it 
except by my thanks and those only on condition that he will decline
his suit to my thanks sir  turning to him   if you have a heart
capable of humanity if you have any esteem for me for my own sake i
beseech you to entitle yourself i beseech you do 

o madam cried he believe believe believe me it is impossible while
you are single i will hope while that hope is encouraged by so many
worthy friends i must persevere i must not slight them madam because
you slight me 

i answered him only with a look but it was of high disdain and turning
from him but what favour dear madam  to my aunt   has the instance
of duty you mention procured me 

your mother and mr solmes replied my aunt have prevailed that your
request to stay here till monday next shall be granted if you will
promise to go cheerfully then 

let me but choose my own visiters and i will go to my uncle's house
with pleasure 

well niece said my aunt we must wave this subject i find we will
now proceed to another which will require your utmost attention it
will give you the reason why mr solmes's presence is requisite 

ay said my uncle and shew you what sort of a man somebody is mr 
solmes pray favour us in the first place with the letter you received
from your anonymous friend 

i will sir and out he pulled a letter-case and taking out a letter 
it is written in answer to one sent to the person it is superscribed 
to roger solmes esq it begins thus honoured sir 

i beg your pardon sir said i but what pray is the intent of reading
this letter to me 

to let you know what a vile man you are thought to have set your heart
upon said my uncle in an audible whisper 

if sir it be suspected that i have set my heart upon any other why
is mr solmes to give himself any further trouble about me 

only hear niece said my aunt only hear what mr solmes has to read
and to say to you on this head 

if madam mr solmes will be pleased to declare that he has no view
to serve no end to promote for himself i will hear any thing he shall
read but if the contrary you must allow me to say that it will abate
with me a great deal of the weight of whatever he shall produce 

hear it but read niece said my aunt 

hear it read said my uncle you are so ready to take part with 

with any body sir that is accused anonymously and from interested
motives 

he began to read and there seemed to be a heavy load of charges in this
letter against the poor criminal but i stopped the reading of it 
and said it will not be my fault if this vilified man be not as
indifferent to me as one whom i never saw if he be otherwise at
present which i neither own nor deny it proceed from the strange
methods taken to prevent it do not let one cause unite him and me and
we shall not be united if my offer to live single be accepted he shall
be no more to me than this gentleman 

still proceed mr solmes hear it out niece was my uncle's cry 

but to what purpose sir said i had not mr solmes a view in this 
and besides can any thing worse be said of mr lovelace than i have
heard said for several months past 

but this said my uncle and what mr solmes can tell you besides 
amounts to the fullest proof 

was the unhappy man then so freely treated in his character before 
without full proof i beseech you sir give me not too good an opinion
of mr lovelace as i may have if such pains be taken to make him
guilty by one who means not his reformation by it nor to do good if i
may presume to say so in this case to any body but himself 

i see very plainly girl said my uncle your prepossession your fond
prepossession for the person of a man without morals 

indeed my dear said my aunt you too much justify all your
apprehension surprising that a young creature of virtue and honour
should thus esteem a man of a quite opposite character 

dear madam do not conclude against me too hastily i believe mr 
lovelace is far from being so good as he ought to be but if every man's
private life was searched into by prejudiced people set on for that
purpose i know not whose reputation would be safe i love a virtuous
character as much in man as in woman i think it is requisite and as
meritorious in the one as in the other and if left to myself i would
prefer a person of such a character to royalty without it 

why then said my uncle 

give me leave sir but i may venture to say that many of those who
have escaped censure have not merited applause 

permit me to observe further that mr solmes himself may not be
absolutely faultless i never head of his virtues some vices i have
heard of excuse me mr solmes i speak to your face the text about
casting the first stone affords an excellent lesson 

he looked down but was silent 

mr lovelace may have vices you have not you may have others which
he has not i speak not this to defend him or to accuse you no man is
bad no one is good in every thing mr lovelace for example is said
to be implacable and to hate my friends that does not make me value
him the more but give me leave to say that they hate him as much mr 
solmes has his antipathies likewise very strong ones and those to his
own relations which i don't find to be the other's fault for he lives
well with his yet he may have as bad worse pardon me he cannot
have in my poor opinion for what must be the man who hates his own
flesh 

you know not madam you know not niece all in one breath you know
not clary 

i may not nor do i desire to know mr solmes's reasons it concerns not
me to know them but the world even the impartial part of it accuses
him if the world is unjust or rash in one man's case why may it not
be so in another's that's all i mean by it nor can there by a greater
sign of want of merit than where a man seeks to pull down another's
character in order to build up his own 

the poor man's face was all this time overspread with confusion 
twisted as it were and all awry neither mouth nor nose standing in
the middle of it he looked as if he were ready to cry and had he been
capable of pitying me i had certainly tried to pity him 

they all three gazed upon one another in silence 

my aunt i saw at least i thought so looked as if she would have been
glad she might have appeared to approve of what i said she but feebly
blamed me when she spoke for not hearing what mr solmes had to say 
he himself seemed not now very earnest to be heard my uncle said 
there was no talking to me and i should have absolutely silenced both
gentlemen had not my brother come in again to their assistance 

this was the strange speech he made at his entrance his eyes flaming
with anger this prating girl has struck you all dumb i perceive 
persevere however mr solmes i have heard every word she has said 
and i know of no other method of being even with her than after she is
yours to make her as sensible of your power as she now makes you of
her insolence 

fie cousin harlowe said my aunt could i have thought a brother would
have said this to a gentleman of a sister 

i must tell you madam said he that you give the rebel courage 
you yourself seem to favour too much the arrogance of her sex in
her otherwise she durst not have thus stopped her uncle's mouth by
reflections upon him as well as denied to hear a gentleman tell her
the danger she is in from a libertine whose protection as she plainly
hinted she intends to claim against her family 

stopped my uncle's mouth by reflections upon him sir said i how can
that be how dare you to make such an application as this 

my aunt wept at his reflection upon her cousin said she to him if
this be the thanks i have for my trouble i have done your father
would not treat me thus and i will say that the hint you gave was an
unbrotherly one 

not more unbrotherly than all the rest of his conduct to me of late 
madam said i i see by this specimen of his violence how every body
has been brought into his measures had i any the least apprehension of
ever being in mr solmes's power this might have affected me but you
see sir to mr solmes what a conduct is thought necessary to enable
you to arrive at your ungenerous end you see how my brother courts for
you 

i disclaim mr harlowe's violence madam with all my soul i will never
remind you 

silence worthy sir said i i will take care you never shall have the
opportunity 

less violence clary said my uncle cousin james you are as much to
blame as your sister 

in then came my sister brother said she you kept not your promise 
you are thought to be to blame within as well as here were not mr 
solmes's generosity and affection to the girl well known what you said
would have been inexcusable my father desires to speak with you and
with you mr solmes if you please 

they all four withdrew into the next apartment 

i stood silent as not knowing presently how to take this intervention
of my sister's but she left me not long at a loss o thou perverse
thing said she  poking out her angry face at me when they were all
gone but speaking spitefully low  what trouble do you give to us all 

you and my brother bella said i give trouble to yourselves yet
neither you nor he have any business to concern yourselves about me 

she threw out some spiteful expressions still in a low voice as if she
chose not to be heard without and i thought it best to oblige her to
raise her tone a little if i could if i could did i say it is easy
to make a passionate spirit answer all one's views upon it 

she accordingly flamed out in a raised tone and this brought my cousin
dolly in to us miss harlowe your company is desired 

i will come presently cousin dolly 

but again provoking a severity from me which she could not bear and
calling me names in once more come dolly with another message that
her company was desired 

not mine i doubt miss dolly said i 

the sweet-tempered girl burst out into tears and shook her head 

go in before me child said bella  vexed to see her concern for me  
with thy sharp face like a new moon what dost thou cry for is it to
make thy keen face look still keener 

i believe bella was blamed too when she went in for i heard her say 
the creature was so provoking there was no keeping a resolution 

mr solmes after a little while came in again by himself to take
leave of me full of scrapes and compliments but too well tutored and
encouraged to give me hope of his declining his suit he begged me
not to impute to him any of the severe things to which he had been a
sorrowful witness he besought my compassion as he called it 

he said the result was that he still had hopes given him and 
although discouraged by me he was resolved to persevere while i
remained single and such long and such painful services he talked of 
as never before were heard of 

i told him in the strongest manner what he had to trust to 

yet still he determined to persist while i was no man's else he must
hope 

what said i will you still persist when i declare as i do now that
my affections are engaged and let my brother make the most of it 

he knew my principles and adored me for them he doubted not that it
was in his power to make me happy and he was sure i would not want the
will to be so 

i assured him that were i to be carried to my uncle's it should answer
no end for i would never see him nor receive a line from him nor hear
a word in his favour whoever were the person who should mention him to
me 

he was sorry for it he must be miserable were i to hold in that mind 
but he doubted not that i might be induced by my father and uncles to
change it 

never never he might depend upon it 

it was richly worth his patience and the trial 

at my expense at the price of all my happiness sir 

he hoped i should be induced to think otherwise 

and then would he have run into his fortune his settlements his
affection vowing that never man loved a woman with so sincere a
passion as he loved me 

i stopped him as to the first part of his speech and to the second 
of the sincerity of his passion what then sir said i is your love to
one who must assure you that never young creature looked upon man with
a more sincere disapprobation than i look upon you and tell me 
what argument can you urge that this true declaration answers not
before-hand 

dearest madam what can i say on my knees i beg 

and down the ungraceful wretch dropped on his knees 

let me not kneel in vain madam let me not be thus despised and he
looked most odiously sorrowful 

i have kneeled too mr solmes often have i kneeled and i will kneel
again even to you sir will i kneel if there be so much merit in
kneeling provided you will not be the implement of my cruel brother's
undeserved persecution 

if all the services even to worship you during my whole life you 
madam invoke and expect mercy yet shew none 

am i to be cruel to myself to shew mercy to you take my estate sir 
with all my heart since you are such a favourite in this house only
leave me myself the mercy you ask for do you shew to others 

if you mean to my relations madam unworthy as they are all shall be
done that you shall prescribe 

who i sir to find you bowels you naturally have not i to purchase
their happiness by the forfeiture of my own what i ask you for 
is mercy to myself that since you seem to have some power over my
relations you will use it in my behalf tell them that you see i
cannot conquer my aversion to you tell them if you are a wise man 
that you too much value your own happiness to risk it against such a
determined antipathy tell them that i am unworthy of your offers and
that in mercy to yourself as well as to me you will not prosecute a
suit so impossible to be granted 

i will risque all consequences said the fell wretch rising with a
countenance whitened over as if with malice his hollow eyes flashing
fire and biting his under lip to shew he could be manly your hatred 
madam shall be no objection with me and i doubt not in a few days to
have it in my power to shew you 

you have it in your power sir 

he came well off to shew you more generosity than noble as you are
said to be to others you shew to me 

the man's face became his anger it seems formed to express the passion 

at that instant again in came my brother sister sister sister said
he with his teeth set act on the termagant part you have so newly
assumed most wonderfully well does it become you it is but a
short one however tyraness in your turn accuse others of your own
guilt but leave her leaver her mr solmes her time is short you'll
find her humble and mortified enough very quickly then how like a
little tame fool will she look with her conscience upbraiding her and
begging of you  with a whining voice the barbarous brother spoke  to
forgive and forget 

more he said as he flew out with a glowing face upon shorey's coming
in to recall him on his violence 

i removed from chair to chair excessively frighted and disturbed at
this brutal treatment 

the man attempted to excuse himself as being sorry for my brother's
passion 

leave me leave me sir fanning or i shall faint and indeed i thought
i should 

he recommended himself to my favour with an air of assurance augmented 
as i thought by a distress so visible in me for he even snatched my
trembling my struggling hand and ravished it to his odious mouth 

i flung from him with high disdain and he withdrew bowing and
cringing self-gratified and enjoying as i thought the confusion he
saw me in 

the wretch is now methinks before me and now i see him awkwardly
striding backward as he retired till the edge of the opened door 
which he ran against remembered him to turn his welcome back upon me 

upon his withdrawing betty brought me word that i was permitted to
go up to my own chamber and was bid to consider of every thing for my
time was short nevertheless she believed i might be permitted to stay
till saturday 

she tells me that although my brother and sister were blamed for being
so hasty with me yet when they made their report and my uncle antony
his of my provocations they were all more determined than ever in mr 
solmes's favour 

the wretch himself she tells me pretends to be more in love with
me than before and to be rather delighted than discouraged with the
conversation that passed between us he ran on she says in raptures 
about the grace wherewith i should dignify his board and the like sort
of stuff either of his saying or of her making 

she closed all with a now is your time miss to submit with a grace 
and to make your own terms with him else i can tell you were i mr 
solmes it should be worse for you and who miss of our sex proceeded
the saucy creature would admire a rakish gentleman when she might be
admired by a sober one to the end of the chapter 

she made this further speech to me on quitting my chamber you have
had amazing good luck miss i must tell you to keep your writings
concealed so cunningly you must needs think i know that you are always
at your pen and as you endeavour to hide that knowledge from me i
do not think myself obliged to keep your secret but i love not to
aggravate i had rather reconcile by much peace-making is my talent 
and ever was and had i been as much your foe as you imagine you had
not perhaps been here now but this however i do not say to make a
merit with you miss for truly it will be the better for you the
sooner every thing is over with you and better for me and for every
one else that's certain yet one hint i must conclude with that your
pen and ink soon as you are to go away will not be long in your power 
i do assure you miss and then having lost that amusement it will be
seen how a mind so active as yours will be able to employ itself 

this hint alarms me so much that i shall instantly begin to conceal in
different places pens inks and paper and to deposit some in the ivy
summer-house if i can find a safe place there and at the worst i
have got a pencil of black and another of red lead which i use in my
drawings and my patterns shall serve for paper if i have no other 

how lucky it was that i had got away my papers they made a strict
search for them that i can see by the disorderly manner they have left
all things in for you know that i am such an observer of method that
i can go to a bit of ribband or lace or edging blindfold the same in
my books which they have strangely disordered and mismatched to look
behind them and in some of them i suppose my clothes too are rumpled
not a little no place has escaped them to your hint i thank you are
they indebted for their disappointment 

the pen through heaviness and fatigue dropt out of my fingers at the
word indebted i resumed it to finish the sentence and to tell you 
that i am 

your for ever obliged and affectionate cl harlowe 




letter xxxv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wednesday eleven o'clock april 5 


i must write as i have opportunity making use of my concealed stores 
for my pens and ink all of each that they could find are taken from
me as i shall tell you about more particularly by and by 

about an hour ago i deposited my long letter to you as also in the
usual place a billet to mr lovelace lest his impatience should put
him upon some rashness signifying in four lines that the interview
was over and that i hoped my steady refusal of mr solmes would
discourage any further applications to me in his favour 

although i was unable through the fatigue i had undergone and by
reason of sitting up all night to write to you which made me lie
longer than ordinary this morning to deposit my letter to you sooner 
yet i hope you will have it in such good time as that you will be able
to send me an answer to it this night or in the morning early which 
if ever so short will inform me whether i may depend upon your
mother's indulgence or not this it behoves me to know as soon as
possible for they are resolved to hurry me away on saturday next at
farthest perhaps to-morrow 

i will now inform you of all that has happened previous to their taking
away my pen and ink as well as of the manner in which that act of
violence was committed and this as briefly as i can 

my aunt who as well as mr solmes and my two uncles lives here i
think came up to me and said she would fain have me hear what mr 
solmes had to say of mr lovelace only that i may be apprized of
some things that would convince me what a vile man he is and what a
wretched husband he must make i might give them what degree of credit
i pleased and take them with abatement for mr solmes's interestedness 
if i thought fit but it might be of use to me were it but to question
mr lovelace indirectly upon some of them that related to myself 

i was indifferent i said about what he could say of me and i was sure
it could not be to my disadvantage and as he had no reason to impute to
me the forwardness which my unkind friends had so causelessly taxed me
with 

she said that he gave himself high airs on account of his family and
spoke as despicably of ours as if an alliance with us were beneath him 

i replied that he was a very unworthy man if it were true to speak
slightingly of a family which was as good as his own bating that
it was not allied to the peerage that the dignity itself i thought 
conveyed more shame than honour to descendants who had not merit to
adorn as well as to be adorned by it that my brother's absurd pride 
indeed which made him every where declare he would never marry but to
quality gave a disgraceful preference against ours but that were i
to be assured that mr lovelace was capable of so mean a pride as to
insult us or value himself on such an accidental advantage i should
think as despicably of his sense as every body else did of his morals 

she insisted upon it that he had taken such liberties it would be but
common justice so much hated as he was by all our family and so
much inveighed against in all companies by them to inquire into the
provocation he had to say what was imputed to him and whether the value
some of my friends put upon the riches they possess throwing perhaps
contempt upon every other advantage and even discrediting their own
pretensions to family in order to depreciate his might not provoke him
to like contempts upon the whole madam said i can you say that the
inveteracy lies not as much on our side as on his can he say any thing
of us more disrespectful than we say of him and as to the suggestion 
so often repeated that he will make a bad husband is it possible for
him to use a wife worse than i am used particularly by my brother and
sister 

ah niece ah my dear how firmly has this wicked man attached you 

perhaps not madam but really great care should be taken by fathers and
mothers when they would have their daughters of their minds in these
particulars not to say things that shall necessitate the child in
honour and generosity to take part with the man her friends are averse
to but waving all this as i have offered to renounce him for ever i
see now why he should be mentioned to me nor why i should be wished to
hear any thing about him 

well but still my dear there can be no harm to let mr solmes tell
you what mr lovelace has said of you severely as you have treated mr 
solmes he is fond of attending you once more he begs to be heard on
this head 

if it be proper for me to hear it madam 

it is eagerly interrupted she very proper 

has what he has said of me madam convinced you of mr lovelace's
baseness 

it has my dear and that you ought to abhor him for it 

then dear madam be pleased to let me hear it from your mouth there
is no need that i should see mr solmes when it will have double the
weight from you what madam has the man dared to say of me 

my aunt was quite at a loss 

at last well said she i see how you are attached i am sorry for it 
miss for i do assure you it will signify nothing you must be mrs 
solmes and that in a very few days 

if consent of heart and assent of voice be necessary to a marriage i
am sure i never can nor ever will be married to mr solmes and what
will any of my relations be answerable for if they force my hand into
his and hold it there till the service be read i perhaps insensible 
and in fits all the time 

what a romantic picture of a forced marriage have you drawn niece 
some people would say you have given a fine description of your own
obstinacy child 

my brother and sister would but you madam distinguish i am sure 
between obstinacy and aversion 

supposed aversion may owe its rise to real obstinacy my dear 

i know my own heart madam i wish you did 

well but see mr solmes once more niece it will oblige and make for
you more than you imagine 

what should i see him for madam is the man fond of hearing me declare
my aversion to him is he desirous of having me more and more incense
my friends against myself o my cunning my ambitious brother 

ah my dear with a look of pity as if she understood the meaning of my
exclamation but must that necessarily be the case 

it must madam if they will take offence at me for declaring my
steadfast detestation of mr solmes as a husband 

mr solmes is to be pitied said she he adores you he longs to see
you once more he loves you the better for your cruel usage of him
yesterday he is in raptures about you 

ugly creature thought i he in raptures 

what a cruel wretch must he be said i who can enjoy the distress to
which he so largely contributes but i see i see madam that i am
considered as an animal to be baited to make sport for my brother
and sister and mr solmes they are all all of them wanton in their
cruelty i madam see the man the man so incapable of pity indeed i
will not see him if i can help it indeed i will not 

what a construction does your lively wit put upon the admiration
mr solmes expresses of you passionate as you were yesterday and
contemptuously as you treated him he dotes upon you for the very
severity by which he suffers he is not so ungenerous a man as you think
him nor has he an unfeeling heart let me prevail upon you my dear 
 as your father and mother expect it of you to see him once more and
hear what he has to say to you 

how can i consent to see him again when yesterday's interview
was interpreted by you madam as well as by every other as an
encouragement to him when i myself declared that if i saw him a second
time by my own consent it might be so taken and when i am determined
never to encourage him 

you might spare your reflections upon me miss i have no thanks either
from one side or the other 

and away she flung 

dearest madam said i following her to the door 

but she would not hear me further and her sudden breaking from me
occasioned a hurry to some mean listener as the slipping of a foot from
the landing-place on the stairs discovered to me 

i had scarcely recovered myself from this attack when up came
betty miss said she your company is desired below-stairs in your own
parlour 

by whom betty 

how can i tell miss perhaps by your sister perhaps by your
brother i know they wont' come up stairs to your apartment again 

is mr solmes gone betty 

i believe he is miss would you have him sent for back said the bold
creature 

down i went and to whom should i be sent for but to my brother and mr 
solmes the latter standing sneaking behind the door so that i saw him
not till i was mockingly led by the hand into the room by my brother 
and then i started as if i had beheld a ghost 

you are to sit down clary 

and what then brother 

why then you are to put off that scornful look and hear what mr 
solmes has to say to you 

sent down for to be baited again thought i 

madam said mr solmes as if in haste to speak lest he should not have
an opportunity given him  and indeed he judged right   mr lovelace is
a declared marriage hater and has a design upon your honour if ever 

base accuser said i in a passion snatching my hand from my brother 
who was insolently motioning to give it to mr solmes he has not he
dares not but you have if endeavouring to force a free mind be to
dishonour it 

o thou violent creature said my brother but not gone yet for i was
rushing away 

what mean you sir  struggling vehemently to get away   to detain me
thus against my will 

you shall not go violence clasping his unbrotherly arms about me 

then let not mr solmes stay why hold you me thus he shall not for
your own sake if i can help it see how barbarously a brother can treat
a sister who deserves not evil treatment 

and i struggled so vehemently to get from him that he was forced to
quit my hand which he did with these words begone then fury how
strong is will there is no holding her 

and up i flew to my chamber and locked myself in trembling and out of
breath 

in less than a quarter of an hour up came betty i let her in upon her
tapping and asking half out of breath too for admittance 

the lord have mercy upon us said she what a confusion of a house is
this  hurrying up and down fanning herself with her handkerchief  
such angry masters and mistresses such an obstinate young lady such
a humble lover such enraged uncles such o dear dear what a
topsy-turvy house is this and all for what trow only because a
young lady may be happy and will not only because a young lady will
have a husband and will not have a husband what hurlyburlies are here 
where all used to be peace and quietness 

thus she ran on to herself while i sat as patiently as i could being
assured that her errand was not designed to be a welcome one to me to
observe when her soliloquy would end 

at last turning to me i must do as i am bid i can't help it don't
be angry with me miss but i must carry down your pen and ink and that
this moment 

by whose order 

by your papa's and mamma's 

how shall i know that 

she offered to go to my closet i stept in before her touch it if you
dare 

up came my cousin dolly madam madam said the poor weeping 
good natured creature in broken sentences you must indeed you
must deliver to betty or to me your pen and ink 

must i my sweet cousin then i will to you but not to this bold body 
and so i gave my standish to her 

i am sorry very sorry said she miss to be the messenger but your
papa will not have you in the same house with him he is resolved you
shall be carried away to-morrow or saturday at farthest and therefore
your pen and ink are taken away that you may give nobody notice of it 

and away went the dear girl very sorrowful carrying down with her my
standish and all its furniture and a little parcel of pens beside 
which having been seen when the great search was made she was bid to
ask for 

as it happened i had not diminished it having hid half a dozen crow
quills in as many different places it was lucky for i doubt not they
had numbered how many were in the parcel 

betty ran on telling me that my mother was now as much incensed
against me as any body that my doom was fixed that my violent
behaviour had not left one to plead for me that mr solmes bit his lip 
and muttered and seemed to have more in his head than could come out
at his mouth that was her phrase 

and yet she also hinted to me that the cruel wretch took pleasure
in seeing me although so much to my disgust and so wanted to see me
again must he not be a savage my dear 

the wench went on that my uncle harlowe said that now he gave me
up that he pitied mr solmes yet hoped he would not think of this
to my detriment hereafter that my uncle antony was of opinion that
i ought to smart for it and for her part and then as one of the
family she gave her opinion of the same side 

as i have no other way of hearing any thing that is said or intended
below i bear sometimes more patiently than i otherwise should do with
her impertinence and indeed she seems to be in all my brother's and
sister's counsels 

miss hervey came up again and demanded an half-pint ink-bottle which
they had seen in my closet 

i gave it her without hesitation 

if they have no suspicion of my being able to write they will perhaps
let me stay longer than otherwise they would 

this my dear is now my situation 

all my dependence all my hopes are in your mother's favour but for
that i know not what i might do for who can tell what will come next 




letter xxxvi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wednesday four o'clock in the
afternoon


i am just returned from depositing the letter i so lately finished and
such of mr lovelace's letters as i had not sent you my long letter i
found remaining there so you will have both together 

i am convinced methinks it is not with you but your servant cannot
always be at leisure however i will deposit as fast as i write i must
keep nothing by me now and when i write lock myself in that i may not
be surprised now they think i have no pen and ink 

i found in the usual place another letter from this diligent man and 
by its contents a confirmation that nothing passes in this house but
he knows it and that almost as soon as it passes for this letter
must have been written before he could have received my billet and
deposited i suppose when that was taken away yet he compliments me in
it upon asserting myself as he calls it on that occasion to my uncle
and to mr solmes 

he assures me however that they are more and more determined to
subdue me 

he sends me the compliments of his family and acquaints me with their
earnest desire to see me amongst them most vehemently does he press for
my quitting this house while it is in my power to get away and again
craves leave to order his uncle's chariot-and-six to attend my commands
at the stile leading to the coppice adjoining to the paddock 

settlements to my own will he again offers lord m and lady sarah and
lady betty to be guarantees of his honour and justice but if i choose
not to go to either of those ladies nor yet to make him the happiest of
men so soon as it is nevertheless his hope that i will he urges me to
withdraw to my own house and to accept of lord m for my guardian and
protector till my cousin morden arrives he can contrive he says 
to give me easy possession of it and will fill it with his female
relations on the first invitation from me and mrs norton or miss
howe may be undoubtedly prevailed upon to be with me for a time there
can be no pretence for litigation he says when i am once in it nor 
if i choose to have it so will he appear to visit me nor presume to
mention marriage to me till all is quiet and easy till every method i
shall prescribe for a reconciliation with my friends is tried till my
cousin comes till such settlements are drawn as he shall approve of for
me and that i have unexceptionable proofs of his own good behaviour 

as to the disgrace a person of my character may be apprehensive of upon
quitting my father's house he observes too truly i doubt that the
treatment i meet with is in every one's mouth yet he says that the
public voice is in my favour my friends themselves he says expect
that i will do myself what he calls this justice why else do they
confine me he urges that thus treated the independence i have a
right to will be my sufficient excuse going but from their house to my
own if i choose that measure or in order to take possession of my
own if i do not that all the disgrace i can receive they have already
given me that his concern and his family's concern in my honour will
be equal to my own if he may be so happy ever to call me his and he
presumes he says to aver that no family can better supply the loss
of my own friends to me than his in whatever way i shall do them the
honour to accept of his and their protection 

but he repeats that in all events he will oppose my being carried to
my uncle's being well assured that i shall be lost to him for ever if
once i enter into that house  he tells me that my brother and sister 
and mr solmes design to be there to receive me that my father and
mother will not come near me till the ceremony is actually over and
that then they will appear in order to try to reconcile me to my odious
husband by urging upon me the obligations i shall be supposed to be
under from a double duty 

how my dear am i driven on one side and invited on the other this
last intimation is but a too probable one all the steps they take seem
to tend to this and indeed they have declared almost as much 

he owns that he has already taken his measures upon this
intelligence but that he is so desirous for my sake i must suppose 
he says that he owes them no forbearance for their own to avoid coming
to extremities that he has suffered a person whom they do not suspect 
to acquaint them with his resolutions as if come at by accident if
they persist in their design to carry me by violence to my uncle's 
in hopes that they may be induced from the fear of mischief which
may ensue to change their measures and yet he is aware that he has
exposed himself to the greatest risques by having caused this intimation
to be given them since if he cannot benefit himself by their fears 
there is no doubt but they will doubly guard themselves against him upon
it 

what a dangerous enterpriser however is this man 

he begs a few lines from me by way of answer to this letter either
this evening or to-morrow morning if he be not so favoured he shall
conclude from what he knows of the fixed determination of my relations 
that i shall be under a closer restraint than before and he shall be
obliged to take his measures according to that presumption 

you will see by this abstract as well by his letter preceding this 
 for both run in the same strain how strangely forward the difficulty
of my situation has brought him in his declarations and proposals and
in his threatenings too which but for that i would not take from him 

something however i must speedily resolve upon or it will be out of
my power to help myself 

now i think of it i will enclose his letter so might have spared the
abstract of it that you may the better judge of all his proposals and
intelligence and les it should fall into other hands i cannot forgive
the contents although i am at a loss what answer to return 


 she accordingly encloses mr lovelace's letter but as the
 most material contents of it are given in her abstract it
 is omitted 


i cannot bear the thoughts of throwing myself upon the protection of his
friends but i will not examine his proposals closely till i hear from
you indeed i have no eligible hope but in your mother's goodness hers
is a protection i could more reputably fly to than to that of any other
person and from hers should be ready to return to my father's for the
breach then would not be irreparable as it would be if i fled to
his family to return i repeat on such terms as shall secure but my
negative not my independence i do not aim at that so shall lay your
mother under the less difficulty though i have a right to be put
into possession of my grandfather's estate if i were to insist upon
it such a right i mean as my brother exerts in the bid that i
should ever think myself freed from my father's reasonable controul 
whatever right my grandfather's will has given me he good gentleman 
left me that estate as a reward of my duty and not to set me above
it as has been justly hinted to me and this reflection makes me more
fearful of not answering the intention of so valuable a bequest oh 
that my friends knew but my heart would but think of it as they used
to do for once more i say if it deceive me not it is not altered 
although theirs are 

would but your mother permit you to send her chariot or chaise to the
bye-place where mr lovelace proposes lord m s shall come provoked 
intimidated and apprehensive as i am i would not hesitate a moment
what to do place me any where as i have said before in a cot in a
garret any where disguised as a servant or let me pass as a servant's
sister so that i may but escape mr solmes on one hand and the
disgrace of refuging with the family of a man at enmity with my own 
on the other and i shall be in some measure happy should your
good mother refuse me what refuge or whose can i fly to dearest
creature advise your distressed friend 


 


i broke off here i was so excessively uneasy that i durst not trust
myself with my own reflections i therefore went down to the garden to
try to calm my mind by shifting the scene i took but one turn upon the
filbert-walk when betty came to me here miss is your papa here
is your uncle antony here is my young master and my young mistress 
coming to take a walk in the garden and your papa sends me to see where
you are for fear he should meet you 

i struck into an oblique path and got behind the yew-hedge seeing my
sister appear and there concealed myself till they were gone past me 

my mother it seems is not well my poor mother keeps her
chamber should she be worse i should have an additional unhappiness 
in apprehension that my reputed undutifulness had touched her heart 

you cannot imagine what my emotions were behind the yew-hedge on seeing
my father so near me i was glad to look at him through the hedge as he
passed by but i trembled in every joint when i heard him utter these
words son james to you and to you bella and to you brother do i
wholly commit this matter that i was meant i cannot doubt and yet 
why was i so affected since i may be said to have been given up to the
cruelty of my brother and sister for many days past 


 


while my father remained in the garden i sent my dutiful compliments
to my mother with inquiry after her health by shorey whom i met
accidentally upon the stairs for none of the servants except my
gaoleress dare to throw themselves in my way i had the mortification
of such a return as made me repent my message though not my concern
for her health let her not inquire after the disorders she occasions 
was her harsh answer i will not receive any compliments from her 

very very hard my dear indeed it is very hard 


 



i have the pleasure to hear that my mother is already better a colicky
disorder to which she is too subject it is hoped it is gone off god
send it may every evil that happens in this house is owing to me 

this good news was told me with a circumstance very unacceptable for
betty said she had orders to let me know that my garden-walks and
poultry-visits were suspected and that both will be prohibited if i
stay here till saturday or monday 

possibly this is said by order to make me go with less reluctance to my
uncle's 

my mother bid her say if i expostulated about these orders and about
my pen and ink that reading was more to the purpose at present than
writing that by the one i might be taught my duty that the other 
considering whom i was believed to write to only stiffened my will 
that my needle-works had better be pursued than my airings which were
observed to be taken in all weathers 

so my dear if i do not resolve upon something soon i shall neither be
able to avoid the intended evil nor have it in my power to correspond
with you 


 

wednesday night 

all is in a hurry below-stairs betty is in and out like a spy 
something is working i know not what i am really a good deal
disordered in body as well as in mind indeed i am quite heart-sick 

i will go down though tis almost dark on pretence of getting a little
air and composure robert has my two former i hope before now and
i will deposit this with lovelace's enclosed if i can for fear of
another search 

i know not what i shall do all is so strangely busy doors clapt
to going out of one apartment hurryingly as i may say into another 
betty in her alarming way staring as if of frighted importance twice
with me in half an hour called down in haste by shorey the last time 
leaving me with still more meaning in her looks and gestures yet
possibly nothing in all this worthy of my apprehensions 

here again comes the creature with her deep-drawn affected sighs and
her o dear's o dear's 


 


more dark hints thrown out by the saucy creature but she will not
explain herself suppose this pretty business ends in murder she says 
i may rue my opposition as long as i live for aught she knows parents
will not be baffled out of their children by imprudent gentlemen nor is
it fit they should it may come home to me when i least expect it 

these are the gloomy and perplexing hints this impertinent throws
out probably they arose from the information mr lovelace says he has
secretly permitted them to have from this vile double-faced agent i
suppose of his resolution to prevent my being carried to my uncle's 

how justly if so may this exasperate them how am i driven to and
fro like a feather in the wind at the pleasure of the rash the
selfish the headstrong and when i am as averse to the proceedings of
the one as i am to those of the other for although i was induced to
carry on this unhappy correspondence as i think i ought to call it in
hopes to prevent mischief yet indiscreet measures are fallen upon by
the rash man before i who am so much concerned in the event of the
present contentions can be consulted and between his violence on one
hand and that of my relations on the other i find myself in danger
from both 

o my dear what is worldly wisdom but the height of folly i the
meanest at least youngest of my father's family to thrust myself
in the gap between such uncontroulable spirits to the intercepting
perhaps of the designs of providence which may intend to make those
hostile spirits their own punishers if so what presumption indeed 
my dear friend i am afraid i have thought myself of too much
consequence but however this be it is good when calamities befal us 
that we should look into ourselves and fear 

if i am prevented depositing this and the enclosed as i intend to try
to do late as it is i will add to it as occasion shall offer mean
time believe me to be

your ever-affectionate and grateful cl harlowe 

under the superscription written with a pencil after she went down 

my two former are not yet taken away i am surprised i hope you are
well i hope all is right betwixt your mother and you 




letter xxxvii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe thursday morning april 9 

i have your three letters never was there a creature more impatient on
the most interesting uncertainty than i was to know the event of the
interview between you and solmes 

it behoves me to account to my dear friend in her present unhappy
situation for every thing that may have the least appearance of
negligence or remissness on my part i sent robin in the morning early 
in hopes of a deposit he loitered about the place till near ten to
no purpose and then came away my mother having given him a letter to
carry to mr hunt's which he was to deliver before three when only in
the day-time that gentleman is at home and to bring back an answer to
it mr hunt's house you know lies wide from harlowe-place robin but
just saved his time and returned not till it was too late to send him
again i only could direct him to set out before day this morning and
if he got any letter to ride as for his life to bring it to me 

i lay by myself a most uneasy night i had through impatience and being
discomposed with it lay longer than usual just as i was risen in came
kitty from robin with your three letters i was not a quarter dressed 
and only slipt on my morning sack proceeding no further till i had
read them all through long as they are and yet i often stopped to rave
aloud though by myself at the devilish people you have to deal with 

how my heart rises at them all how poorly did they design to trick
you into an encouragement of solmes from the extorted interview i
am very very angry at your aunt hervey to give up her own judgment so
tamely and not content to do so to become such an active instrument
in their hands but it is so like the world so like my mother
too next to her own child there is not any body living she values so
much as you yet it is why should we embroil ourselves nancy with
the affairs of other people 

other people how i hate the poor words where friendship is concerned 
and where the protection to be given may be of so much consequence to a
friend and of so little detriment to one's self 

i am delighted with your spirit however i expected it not from you
nor did they i am sure nor would you perhaps have exerted it if
lovelace's intelligence of solmes's nursery-offices had not set you up 
i wonder not that the wretch is said to love you the better for it what
an honour would it be to him to have such a wife and he can be even
with you when you are so he must indeed be a savage as you say yet
he is less to blame for his perseverance than those of your own family 
whom most you reverence for theirs 

it is well as i have often said that i have not such provocations
and trials i should perhaps long ago have taken your cousin dolly's
advice yet dare i not to touch that key i shall always love the good
girl for her tenderness to you 

i know not what to say of lovelace nor what to think of his promises 
nor of his proposals to you tis certain that you are highly esteemed
by all his family the ladies are persons of unblemished honour my lord
m is also as men and peers go a man of honour i could tell what to
advise any other person in the world to do but you so much expected
from you such a shining light your quitting your father's house and
throwing yourself into the protection of a family however honourable 
that has a man in it whose person parts declarations and
pretensions will be thought to have engaged your warmest
esteem methinks i am rather for advising that you should get privately
to london and not to let either him or any body else but me know
where you are till your cousin morden comes 

as to going to your uncle's that you must not do if you can help
it nor must you have solmes that's certain not only because of his
unworthiness in every respect but because of the aversion you have so
openly avowed to him which every body knows and talks of as they do
of your approbation of the other for your reputation sake therefore 
as well as to prevent mischief you must either live single or have
lovelace 

if you think of going to london let me know and i hope you will have
time to allow me a further concert as to the manner of your getting
away and thither and how to procure proper lodgings for you 

to obtain this time you must palliate a little and come into some
seeming compromise if you cannot do otherwise driven as you are
driven it will be strange if you are not obliged to part with a few of
your admirable punctilio's 

you will observe from what i have written that i have not succeeded
with my mother 

i am extremely mortified and disappointed we have had very strong
debates upon it but besides the narrow argument of embroiling
ourselves with other people's affairs as above-mentioned she will have
it that it is your duty to comply she says she was always of opinion
that daughters should implicitly submit to the will of their parents in
the great article of marriage and that she governed herself accordingly
in marrying my father who at first was more the choice of her parents
than her own 

this is what she argues in behalf of her favourite hickman as well as
for solmes in your case 

i must not doubt but my mother always governed herself by this
principle because she says she did i have likewise another reason to
believe it which you shall have though it may not become me to give
it that they did not live so happily together as one would hope people
might do who married preferring each other at the time to the rest of
the world 

somebody shall fare never the better for this double-meant policy of my
mother i do assure you such a retrospection in her arguments to
him and to his address it is but fit that he should suffer for my
mortification in failing to carry a point upon which i had set my whole
heart 

think my dear if in any way i can serve you if you allow of it 
i protest i will go off privately with you and we will live and die
together think of it improve upon my hint and command me 

a little interruption what is breakfast to the subject i am upon 


 


london i am told is the best hiding-place in the world i have written
nothing but what i will stand in to at the word of command women love
to engage in knight-errantry now-and-then as well as to encourage
it in the men but in your case what i propose will not seem to have
anything of that nature in it it will enable me to perform what is no
more than a duty in serving and comforting a dear and worthy friend who
labours under undeserved oppression and you will ennoble as i may say 
your anna howe if you allow her to be your companion in affliction 

i will engage my dear we shall not be in town together one month 
before we surmount all difficulties and this without being beholden to
any men-fellows for their protection 

i must repeat what i have often said that the authors of your
persecutions would not have presumed to set on foot their selfish
schemes against you had they not depended upon the gentleness of your
spirit though now having gone so far and having engaged old authority
in it  chide me if you will   neither he nor they know how to recede 

when they find you out of their reach and know that i am with you 
you'll see how they'll pull in their odious horns 

i think however that you should have written to your cousin morden 
the moment they had begun to treat you disgracefully 

i shall be impatient to hear whether they will attempt to carry you to
your uncle's i remember that lord m s dismissed bailiff reported of
lovelace that he had six or seven companions as bad as himself and
that the country was always glad when they left it he actually has as
i hear such a knot of them about him now and depend upon it he will
not suffer them quietly to carry you to your uncle's and whose must you
be if he succeeds in taking you from them 


 see vol i letter iv 


i tremble for you but upon supposing what may be the consequence of a
conflict upon this occasion lovelace owes some of them vengeance this
gives me a double concern that my mother should refuse her consent to
the protection i had set my heart upon procuring for you 

my mother will not breakfast without me a quarrel has its conveniencies
sometimes yet too much love i think is as bad as too little 


 


we have just now had another pull upon my word she is
excessively what shall i say unpersuadable i must let her off with
that soft word 

who was the old greek that said he governed athens his wife him and
his son her 

it was not my mother's fault  i am writing to you you know  that she
did not govern my father but i am but a daughter yet i thought i was
not quite so powerless when i was set upon carrying a point as i find
myself to be 

adieu my dear happier times must come and that quickly too the
strings cannot long continue to be thus overstrained they must break
or be relaxed in either way the certainty must be preferable to the
suspense 

one word more 

i think in my conscience you must take one of these two alternatives 
either to consent to let us go to london together privately  in which
case i will procure a vehicle and meet you at your appointment at the
stile to which lovelace proposes to bring his uncle's chariot   or 
to put yourself into the protection of lord m and the ladies of his
family 

you have another indeed and that is if you are absolutely resolved
against solmes to meet and marry lovelace directly 

whichsoever of these you make choice of you will have this plea 
both to yourself and to the world that you are concluded by the same
uniform principle that has governed your whole conduct ever since the
contention between lovelace and your brother has been on foot that
is to say that you have chosen a lesser evil in hopes to prevent a
greater 

adieu and heaven direct for the best my beloved creature prays

her anna howe 




letter xxxviii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday april 6 


i thank you my dearest friend for the pains you have taken in
accounting so affectionately for my papers not being taken away
yesterday and for the kind protection you would have procured for me 
if you could 

this kind protection was what i wished for but my wishes raised at
first by your love were rather governed by my despair of other refuge
 having before cast about and not being able to determine what i
ought to do and what i could do in a situation so unhappy  than by a
reasonable hope for why indeed should any body embroil themselves for
others when they can avoid it 

all my consolation is as i have frequently said that i have not by my
own inadvertence or folly brought myself into this sad situation if i
had i should not have dared to look up to any body with the expectation
of protection or assistance nor to you for excuse of the trouble i give
you but nevertheless we should not be angry at a person's not doing
that for ourselves or for our friend which she thinks she ought not to
do and which she has it in her option either to do or to let it alone 
much less have you a right to be displeased with so prudent a mother 
for not engaging herself so warmly in my favour as you wished she
would if my own aunt can give me up and that against her judgment as
i may presume to say and if my father and mother and uncles who once
loved me so well can join so strenuously against me can i expect or
ought you the protection of your mother in opposition to them 

indeed my dear love  permit me to be very serious   i am afraid i am
singled out either for my own faults or for the faults of my
family or perhaps for the faults of both to be a very unhappy
creature signally unhappy for see you not how irresistible the waves
of affliction come tumbling down upon me 

we have been till within these few weeks every one of us too happy no
crosses no vexations but what we gave ourselves from the pamperedness 
as i may call it of our own wills surrounded by our heaps and stores 
hoarded up as fast as acquired we have seemed to think ourselves out
of the reach of the bolts of adverse fate i was the pride of all my
friends proud myself of their pride and glorying in my standing who
knows what the justice of heaven may inflict in order to convince us 
that we are not out of the reach of misfortune and to reduce us to a
better reliance than what we have hitherto presumptuously made 

i should have been very little the better for the conversation-visits
with the good dr lewen used to honour me with and for the principles
wrought as i may say into my earliest mind by my pious mrs norton 
founded on her reverend father's experience as well as on her own if
i could not thus retrospect and argue in such a strange situation as we
are in strange i may well call it for don't you see my dear that we
seem all to be impelled as it were by a perverse fate which none of
us are able to resist and yet all arising with a strong appearance
of self-punishment from ourselves do not my parents see the hopeful
children from whom they expected a perpetuity of worldly happiness
to their branching family now grown up to answer the till now distant
hope setting their angry faces against each other pulling up by the
roots as i may say that hope which was ready to be carried into a
probable certainty 

your partial love will be ready to acquit me of capital and intentional
faults but oh my dear my calamities have humbled me enough to make
me turn my gaudy eye inward to make me look into myself and what have
i discovered there why my dear friend more secret pride and vanity
than i could have thought had lain in my unexamined heart 

if i am to be singled out to be the punisher of myself and family who
so lately was the pride of it pray for me my dear that i may not
be left wholly to myself and that i may be enabled to support my
character so as to be justly acquitted of wilful and premeditated
faults the will of providence be resigned to in the rest as that
leads let me patiently and unrepiningly follow i shall not live
always may but my closing scene be happy 

but i will not oppress you my dearest friend with further reflections
of this sort i will take them all into myself surely i have a mind
that has room for them my afflictions are too sharp to last long the
crisis is at hand happier times you bid me hope for i will hope 


 


but yet i cannot be but impatient at times to find myself thus driven 
and my character so depreciated and sunk that were all the future to be
happy i should be ashamed to shew my face in public or to look up and
all by the instigation of a selfish brother and envious sister 

but let me stop let me reflect are not these suggestions the
suggestions of the secret pride i have been censuring then already
so impatient but this moment so resigned so much better disposed
for reflection yet tis hard tis very hard to subdue an embittered
spirit in the instant of its trial too o my cruel brother but
now it rises again i will lay down a pen i am so little able
to govern and i will try to subdue an impatience which if my
afflictions are sent me for corrective ends may otherwise lead me into
still more punishable errors 


 


i will return to a subject which i cannot fly from for ten minutes
together called upon especially as i am by your three alternatives
stated in the conclusion of your last 

as to the first to wit your advice for me to escape to london let me
tell you that the other hint or proposal which accompanies it perfectly
frightens me surely my dear happy as you are and indulgently
treated as your mother treats you you cannot mean what you propose 
what a wretch must i be if for one moment only i could lend an ear
to such a proposal as this i to be the occasion of making such
a mother's perhaps shortened life unhappy to the last hour of
it ennoble you my dear creature how must such an enterprise the
rashness public the motives were they excusable private debase
you but i will not dwell upon the subject for your own sake i will
not 

as to your second alternative to put myself into the protection of lord
m and of the ladies of that family i own to you as i believe i have
owned before that although to do this would be the same thing in the
eye of the world as putting myself into mr lovelace's protection yet
i think i would do it rather than be mr solmes's wife if there were
evidently no other way to avoid being so 

mr lovelace you have seen proposes to contrive a way to put me into
possession of my own house and he tells me that he will soon fill
it with the ladies of his family as my visiters upon my invitation 
however to them a very inconsiderate proposal i think it to be 
and upon which i cannot explain myself to him what an exertion of
independency does it chalk out for me how were i to attend to him 
 and not to the natural consequences to which the following of his
advice would lead me might i be drawn by gentle words into the
penetration of the most violent acts for how could i gain possession 
but either by legal litigation which were i inclined to have recourse
to it as i never can be must take up time or by forcibly turning
out the persons whom my father has placed there to look after the
gardens the house and the furniture persons entirely attached to
himself and who as i know have been lately instructed by my brother 

your third alternative to meet and marry mr lovelace directly a man
with whose morals i am far from being satisfied a step that could
not be taken with the least hope of ever obtaining pardon from or
reconciliation with any of my friends and against which a thousand
objections rise in my mind that is not to be thought of 

what appears to me upon the fullest deliberation the most eligible 
if i must be thus driven is the escaping to london but i would forfeit
all my hopes of happiness in this life rather than you should go away
with me as you rashly though with the kindest intentions propose 
if i could get safely thither and be private methinks i might remain
absolutely independent of mr lovelace and at liberty either to make
proposals to my friends or should they renounce me and i had no
other or better way to make terms with him supposing my cousin
morden on his arrival were to join with my other relations but they
would then perhaps indulge me in my choice of a single life on giving
him up the renewing to them this offer when at my own liberty will
at least convince them that i was in earnest when i made it first and 
upon my word i would stand to it dear as you seem to think when you
are disposed to rally me it would cost me to stand to it 

if my dear you can procure a vehicle for us both you can perhaps
procure one for me singly but can it be done without embroiling
yourself with your mother or her with our family be it coach 
chariot chaise wagon or horse i matter not provided you appear not
to have a hand in my withdrawing only in case it be one of the two
latter i believe i must desire you to get me an ordinary gown and coat 
or habit of some servant having no concert with any of our own the
more ordinary the better they must be thrust on in the wood-house 
where i can put them on and then slide down from the bank that
separates the wood-yard from the green lane 

but alas my dear this even this alternative is not without
difficulties which to a spirit so little enterprising as mine seem in
a manner insuperable these are my reflections upon it 

i am afraid in the first place that i shall not have time for the
requisite preparations for an escape 

should i be either detected in those preparations or pursued and
overtaken in my flight and so brought back then would they think
themselves doubly warranted to compel me to have their solmes and 
conscious of an intended fault perhaps i should be the less able to
contend with them 

but were i even to get safely to london i know nobody there but by
name and those the tradesmen to our family who no doubt would be
the first written to and engaged to find me out and should mr lovelace
discover where i was and he and my brother meet what mischiefs
might ensue between them whether i were willing or not to return to
harlowe-place 

but supposing i could remain there concealed to what might my youth my
sex and unacquaintedness of the ways of that great wicked town expose
me i should hardly dare to go to church for fear of being discovered 
people would wonder how i lived who knows but i might pass for a kept
mistress and that although nobody came to me yet that every time i
went out it might be imagined to be in pursuance of some assignation 

you my dear who alone would know where to direct to me would be
watched in all your steps and in all your messages and your mother 
at present not highly pleased with our correspondence would then have
reason to be more displeased and might not differences follow between
her and you that would make me very unhappy were i to know them and
this the more likely as you take it so unaccountably and give me
leave to say so ungenerously into your head to revenge yourself upon
the innocent mr hickman for all the displeasure your mother gives you 

were lovelace to find out my place of abode that would be the same
thing in the eye of the world as if i had actually gone off with him 
for would he do you think be prevailed upon to forbear visiting me 
and then his unhappy character a foolish man would be no credit to
any young creature desirous of concealment indeed the world let me
escape whither and to whomsoever i could would conclude him to be the
contriver of it 

these are the difficulties which arise to me on revolving this scheme 
which nevertheless might appear surmountable to a more enterprising
spirit in my circumstances if you my dear think them surmountable in
any one of the cases put  and to be sure i can take no course but what
must have some difficulty in it   be pleased to let me know your free
and full thoughts upon it 

had you my dear friend been married then should i have had no doubt
but that you and mr hickman would have afforded an asylum to a poor
creature more than half lost in her own apprehension for want of one
kind protecting friend 

you say i should have written to my cousin morden the moment i was
treated disgracefully but could i have believed that my friends would
not have softened by degrees when they saw my antipathy to their solmes 

i had thoughts indeed several times of writing to my cousin but by the
time an answer could have come i imagined all would have been over as
if it had never been so from day to day from week to week i hoped on 
and after all i might as reasonably fear as i have heretofore said 
that my cousin would be brought to side against me as that some of
those i have named would 

and then to appeal a cousin  i must have written with warmth to engage
him  against a father this was not a desirable thing to set about then
i had not you know one soul on my side my mother herself against me 
to be sure my cousin would have suspended his judgment till he could
have arrived he might not have been in haste to come hoping the malady
would cure itself but had he written his letters probably would have
run in the qualifying style to persuade me to submit or them only to
relax had his letters been more on my side than on theirs they would
not have regarded them nor perhaps himself had he come and been an
advocate for me for you see how strangely determined they are how they
have over-awed or got in every body so that no one dare open their lips
in my behalf and you have heard that my brother pushes his measures
with the more violence that all may be over with me before my cousin's
expected arrival 

but you tell me that in order to gain time i must palliate that i
must seem to compromise with my friends but how palliate how seem to
compromise you would not have me endeavour to make them believe that i
will consent to what i never intended to consent to you would not have
me to gain time with a view to deceive 

to do evil that good may come of it is forbidden and shall i do evil 
yet know not whether good may come of it or not 

forbid it heaven that clarissa harlowe should have it in her thought
to serve or even to save herself at the expense of her sincerity and
by a studied deceit 

and is there after all no way to escape one great evil but by
plunging myself into another what an ill-fated creature am i pray
for me my dearest nancy my mind is at present so much disturbed that
i can hardly pray for myself 




letter xxxix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday night 


this alarming hurry i mentioned under my date of last night and betty's
saucy dark hints come out to be owing to what i guessed they were that
is to say to the private intimation mr lovelace contrived our family
should have of his insolent resolution  insolent i must call it  to
prevent my being carried to my uncle's 

i saw at the time that it was as wrong with respect to answering his own
view as it was insolent for could he think as betty i suppose from
her betters justly observed that parents would be insulted out of
their right to dispose of their own child by a violent man whom they
hate and who could have no pretension to dispute that right with them 
unless what he had from her who had none over herself and how must
this insolence of his aggravated as my brother is able to aggravate it 
exasperate them against me 

the rash man has indeed so far gained his point as to intimidate them
from attempting to carry me away but he has put them upon a surer and
a more desperate measure and this has driven me also into one as
desperate the consequence of which although he could not foresee it 
may perhaps too well answer his great end little as he deserves to have
it answered 


 she was mistaken in this mr lovelace did foresee this
 consequence all his contrivances led to it and the whole
 family as he boasts unknown to themselves were but so
 many puppets danced by his wires see vol i letter xxxi 


in short i have done as far as i know the most rash thing that ever i
did in my life 

but let me give you the motive and then the action will follow of
course 

about six o'clock this evening my aunt who stays here all night on my
account no doubt came up and tapped at my door for i was writing 
and had locked myself in i opened it and she entering thus delivered
herself 

i come once more to visit you my dear but sorely against my will 
because it is to impart to you matters of the utmost concern to you and
to the whole family 

what madam is now to be done with me said i wholly attentive 

you will not be hurried away to your uncle's child let that comfort
you they see your aversion to go you will not be obliged to go to
your uncle antony's 

how you revive me madam this is a cordial to my heart 

i little thought my dear what was to follow this supposed
condescension 

and then i ran over with blessings for this good news and she
permitted me so to do by her silence congratulating myself that
i thought my father could not resolve to carry things to the last
extremity 

hold niece said she at last you must not give yourself too much joy
upon the occasion neither don't be surprised my dear why look you
upon me child with so affecting an earnestness but you must be mrs 
solmes for all that 

i was dumb 

she then told me that they had undoubted information that a certain
desperate ruffian i must excuse her that word she said had prepared
armed men to way-lay my brother and uncles and seize me and carry me
off surely she said i was not consenting to a violence that might be
followed by murder on one side or the other perhaps on both 

i was still silent 

that therefore my father still more exasperated than before had
changed his resolution as to my going to my uncle's and was determined
next tuesday to set out thither himself with my mother and that for
it was to no purpose to conceal a resolution so soon to be put into
execution i must not dispute it any longer on wednesday i must give
my hand as they would have me 

she proceeded that orders were already given for a license that the
ceremony was to be performed in my own chamber in presence of all my
friends except of my father and mother who would not return nor see
me till all was over and till they had a good account of my behaviour 

the very intelligence my dear the very intelligence this which
lovelace gave me 

i was still dumb only sighing as if my heart would break 

she went on comforting me as she thought she laid before me the
merit of obedience and told me that if it were my desire that my
norton should be present at the ceremony it would be complied with 
that the pleasure i should receive from reconciling al my friends to me 
and in their congratulations upon it must needs overbalance with such
a one as me the difference of persons however preferable i might think
the one man to the other that love was a fleeting thing little better
than a name where mortality and virtue did not distinguish the object
of it that a choice made by its dictates was seldom happy at least not
durably so nor was it to be wondered at when it naturally exalted the
object above its merits and made the lover blind to faults that were
visible to every body else so that when a nearer intimacy stript it of
its imaginary perfections it left frequently both parties surprised 
that they could be so grossly cheated and that then the indifference
became stronger than the love ever was that a woman gave a man great
advantages and inspired him with great vanity when she avowed her
love for him and preference of him and was generally requited with
insolence and contempt whereas the confessedly-obliged man it was
probable would be all reverence and gratitude' and i cannot tell what 

you my dear said she believe you shall be unhappy if you have
mr solmes your parents think the contrary and that you will be
undoubtedly so were you to have mr lovelace whose morals are
unquestionably bad suppose it were your sad lot to consider what
great consolation you will have on one hand if you pursue your parents'
advice that you did so what mortification on the other that by
following your own you have nobody to blame but yourself 

this you remember my dear was an argument enforced upon me by mrs 
norton 

these and other observations which she made were worthy of my aunt
hervey's good sense and experience and applied to almost any young
creature who stood in opposition to her parents' will but one who had
offered to make the sacrifices i have offered to make ought to have had
their due weight but although it was easy to answer some of them in my
own particular case yet having over and over to my mother before my
confinement and to my brother and sister and even to my aunt hervey 
since said what i must now have repeated i was so much mortified and
afflicted at the cruel tidings she brought me that however attentive i
was to what she said i had neither power nor will to answer one word 
and had she not stopped of herself she might have gone on an hour
longer without interruption from me 

observing this and that i only sat weeping my handkerchief covering
my face and my bosom heaving ready to burst what no answer my
dear why so much silent grief you know i have always loved you you
know that i have no interest in the affair you would not permit mr 
solmes to acquaint you with some things which would have set your heart
against mr lovelace shall i tell you some of the matters charged
against him shall i my dear 

still i answered only by my tears and sighs 

well child you shall be told these things afterwards when you will be
in a better state of mind to hear them and then you will rejoice in the
escape you will have had it will be some excuse then for you to plead
for your behaviour to mr solmes that you could not have believed mr 
lovelace had been so very vile a man 

my heart fluttered with impatience and anger at being so plainly talked
to as the wife of this man but yet i then chose to be silent if i had
spoken it would have been with vehemence 

strange my dear such silence your concern is infinitely more on this
side the day than it will be on the other but let me ask you and do
not be displeased will you choose to see what generous stipulations
for you there are in the settlements you have knowledge beyond your
years give the writings a perusal do my dear they are engrossed and
ready for signing and have been for some time excuse me my love i
mean not to disorder you your father would oblige me to bring them up 
and to leave them with you he commands you to read them but to read
them niece since they are engrossed and were before you made them
absolutely hopeless 

and then to my great terror she drew some parchments form her
handkerchief which she had kept unobserved by me under her apron 
and rising put them in the opposite window had she produced a serpent 
i could not have been more frightened 

oh my dearest aunt turning away my face and holding out my hands 
hide from my eyes those horrid parchments let me conjure you to tell
me by all the tenderness of near relationship and upon your honour 
and by your love for me say are they absolutely resolved that come
what will i must be that man's 

my dear you must have mr solmes indeed you must 

indeed i never will this as i have said over and over is not
originally my father's will indeed i never will and that is all i
will say 

it is your father's will now replied my aunt and considering how
all the family is threatened by mr lovelace and the resolution he has
certainly taken to force you out of their hands i cannot but say they
are in the right not to be bullied out of their child 

well madam then nothing remains for me to say i am made desperate i
care not what becomes of me 

your piety and your prudence my dear and mr lovelace's immoral
character together with his daring insults and threatenings which
ought to incense you as much as any body are every one's dependence 
we are sure the time will come when you'll think very differently of
the steps your friends take to disappoint a man who has made himself so
justly obnoxious to them all 

she withdrew leaving me full of grief and indignation and as much
out of humour with mr lovelace as with any body who by his conceited
contrivances has made things worse for me than before depriving me
of the hopes i had of gaining time to receive your advice and private
assistance to get to town and leaving me not other advice in all
appearance than either to throw myself upon his family or to be made
miserable for ever with mr solmes but i was still resolved to avoid
both these evils if possible 

i sounded betty in the first place whom my aunt sent up not thinking
it proper as betty told me that i should be left by myself and who i
found knew their designs whether it were not probable that they
would forbear at my earnest entreaty to push matters to the threatened
extremity 

but she confirmed all my aunt said rejoicing as she said they all did 
that mr lovelace had given them so good a pretence to save me from him
now and for ever 

she ran on about equipages bespoken talked of my brother's and sister's
exultations that now the whole family would soon be reconciled to each
other of the servants' joy upon it of the expected license of a visit
to be paid me by dr lewen or another clergyman whom they named not
to her which was to crown the work and of other preparations so
particular as made me dread that they designed to surprise me into a
still nearer day than wednesday 

these things made me excessively uneasy i knew not what to resolve
upon 

at one time what have i to do thought i but to throw myself at once
into the protection of lady betty lawrance but then in resentment of
his fine contrivances which had so abominably disconcerted me i soon
resolved to the contrary and at last concluded to ask the favour of
another half-hour's conversation with my aunt 

i sent betty to her with my request 

she came 

i put it to her in the most earnest manner to tell me whether i might
not obtain the favour of a fortnight's respite 

she assured me it would not be granted 

would a week surely a week would 

she believed a week might if i would promise two things the first 
upon my honour not to write a line out of the house in that week 
for it was still suspected she said that i found means to write to
somebody and secondly to marry mr solmes at the expiration of it 

impossible impossible i said with a passion what might not i be
obliged with one week without such a horrid condition as the last 

she would go down she said that she might not seem of her own head to
put upon me what i thought a hardship so great 

she went down and came up again 

did i want was the answer to give the vilest of men an opportunity to
put his murderous schemes into execution it was time for them to put
an end to my obstinacy they were tired out with me and to his hopes
at once and an end should be put on tuesday or wednesday next at
furthest unless i would give my honour to comply with the condition
upon which my aunt had been so good as to allow me a longer time 

i even stamped with impatience i called upon her to witness that
i was guiltless of the consequence of this compulsion this barbarous
compulsion i called it let that consequence be what it would 

my aunt chid me in a higher strain than ever she did before 

while i in a half phrensy insisted upon seeing my father such usage 
i said set me above fear i would rejoice to owe my death to him as i
did my life 

i did go down half way of the stairs resolved to throw myself at his
feet wherever he was my aunt was frighted she owned that she feared
for my head indeed i was in a perfect phrensy for a few minutes but
hearing my brother's voice as talking to somebody in my sister's
apartment just by i stopt and heard the barbarous designer say 
speaking to my sister this works charmingly my dear arabella 

it does it does said she in an exulting accent 

let us keep it up said my brother the villain is caught in his own
trap now must she be what we would have her be 

do you keep my father to it i'll take care of my mother said bella 

never fear said he and a laugh of congratulation to each other and
derision of me as i made it out quite turned my frantic humour into a
vindictive one 

my aunt then just coming down to me and taking my hand led me up and
tried to sooth me 

my raving was turned into sullenness 

she preached patience and obedience to me 

i was silent 

at last she desired me to assure her that i would offer no violence to
myself 

god i said had given me more grace i hoped than to permit me to be
guilty of so horrid a rashness i was his creature and not my own 

she then took leave of me and i insisted upon her taking down with her
the odious parchments 

seeing me in so ill an humour and very earnest that she should take
them with her she took them but said that my father should not know
that she did and hoped i would better consider of the matter and be
calmer next time they were offered to my perusal 

i revolved after she was gone all that my brother and sister had said 
i dwelt upon their triumphings over me and found rise in my mind
a rancour that was new to me and which i could not withstand and
putting every thing together dreading the near day what could i
do am i in any manner excusable for what i did do if i shall be
condemned by the world who know not my provocations may i be acquitted
by you if not i am unhappy indeed for this i did 

having shaken off the impertinent betty i wrote to mr lovelace to
let him know that all that was threatened at my uncle antony's was
intended to be executed here that i had come to a resolution to throw
myself upon the protection of either of his two aunts who would afford
it me in short that by endeavouring to obtain leave on monday to dine
in the ivy summer-house i would if possible meet him without the
garden-door at two three four or five o'clock on monday afternoon 
as i should be able that in the mean time he should acquaint me 
whether i might hope for either of those ladies' protection and if i
might i absolutely insisted that he should leave me with either and go
to london himself or remain at lord m s nor offer to visit me till i
were satisfied that nothing could be done with my friends in an amicable
way and that i could not obtain possession of my own estate and leave
to live upon it and particularly that he should not hint marriage to
me till i consented to hear him upon that subject i added that if
he could prevail upon one of the misses montague to favour me with
her company on the road it would make me abundantly more easy in the
thoughts of carrying into effect a resolution which i had not come to 
although so driven but with the utmost reluctance and concern and
which would throw such a slur upon my reputation in the eye of the
world as perhaps i should never be able to wipe off 

this was the purport of what i wrote and down into the garden i slid
with it in the dark which at another time i should not have had the
courage to do and deposited it and came up again unknown to any body 

my mind so dreadfully misgave me when i returned that to divert in
some measure my increasing uneasiness i had recourse to my private pen 
and in a very short time ran this length 

and now that i am come to this part my uneasy reflections begin again
to pour in upon me yet what can i do i believe i shall take it back
again the first thing in the morning yet what can i do 

and who knows but they may have a still earlier day in their intention 
than that which will too soon come 

i hope to deposit this early in the morning for you as i shall return
from resuming my letter if i do resume it as my inwardest mind bids me 

although it is now near two o'clock i have a good mind to slide down
once more in order to take back my letter our doors are always locked
and barred up at eleven but the seats of the lesser hall-windows being
almost even with the ground without and the shutters not difficult to
open i could easily get out 

yet why should i be thus uneasy since should the letter go i can
but hear what mr lovelace says to it his aunts live at too great a
distance for him to have an immediate answer from them so i can scruple
going to them till i have invitation i can insist upon one of his
cousins meeting me in the chariot and may he not be able to obtain
that favour from either of them twenty things may happen to afford me
a suspension at least why should i be so very uneasy when likewise
i can take back my letter early before it is probable he will have the
thought of finding it there yet he owns he spends three parts of his
days and has done for this fortnight past in loitering about sometimes
in one disguise sometimes in another besides the attendance given by
his trusty servant when he himself is not in waiting as he calls it 

but these strange forebodings yet i can if you advise cause the
chariot he shall bring with him to carry me directly to town whither
in my london scheme if you were to approve it i had proposed to go 
and this will save you the trouble of procuring for me a vehicle as
well as prevent any suspicion from your mother of your contributing to
my escape 

but solicitous of your advice and approbation too if i can have it i
will put an end to this letter 

adieu my dearest friend adieu 




letter xl

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday morning seven o'clock april
7 


my aunt hervey who is a very early riser was walking in the garden
 betty attending her as i saw from my window this morning when i
arose for after such a train of fatigue and restless nights i had
unhappily overslept myself so all i durst venture upon was to step
down to my poultry-yard and deposit mine of yesterday and last night 
and i am just come up for she is still in the garden this prevents me
from going to resume my letter as i think still to do and hope it will
not be too late 

i said i had unhappily overslept myself i went to bed about half
an hour after two i told the quarters till five after which i dropt
asleep and awaked not till past six and then in great terror from a
dream which has made such an impression upon me that slightly as i
think of dreams i cannot help taking this opportunity to relate it to
you 

methought my brother my uncle antony and mr solmes had formed a
plot to destroy mr lovelace who discovering it and believing i had a
hand in it turned all his rage against me i thought he made them all
fly to foreign parts upon it and afterwards seizing upon me carried
me into a church-yard and there notwithstanding all my prayers and
tears and protestations of innocence stabbed me to the heart and
then tumbled me into a deep grave ready dug among two or three
half-dissolved carcases throwing in the dirt and earth upon me with his
hands and trampling it down with his feet 

i awoke in a cold sweat trembling and in agonies and still the
frightful images raised by it remain upon my memory 

but why should i who have such real evils to contend with regard
imaginary ones this no doubt was owing to my disturbed imagination 
huddling together wildly all the frightful idea which my aunt's
communications and discourse my letter to mr lovelace my own
uneasiness upon it and the apprehensions of the dreaded wednesday 
furnished me with 


 

eight o'clock 

the man my dear has got the letter what a strange diligence i wish
he mean me well that he takes so much pains yet to be ingenuous i
must own that i should be displeased if he took less i wish however 
he had been an hundred miles off what an advantage have i given him
over me 

now the letter is out of my power i have more uneasiness and regret
than i had before for till now i had a doubt whether it should or
should not go and now i think it ought not to have gone and yet is
there any other way than to do as i have done if i would avoid solmes 
but what a giddy creature shall i be thought if i pursue the course to
which this letter must lead me 

my dearest friend tell me have i done wrong yet do not say i have 
if you think it for should all the world besides condemn me i shall
have some comfort if you do not the first time i ever besought you to
flatter me that of itself is an indication that i have done wrong 
and am afraid of hearing the truth o tell me but yet do not tell me 
if i have done wrong 


 


friday eleven o'clock 

my aunt has made me another visit she began what she had to say
with letting me know that my friends are all persuaded that i still
correspond with mr lovelace as is plain she said by hints and
menaces he throws out which shew that he is apprized of several things
that have passed between my relations and me sometimes within a very
little while after they have happened 

although i approve not of the method he stoops to take to come at his
intelligence yet it is not prudent in me to clear myself by the ruin of
the corrupted servant although his vileness has neither my connivance
nor approbation since my doing so might occasion the detection of my
own correspondence and so frustrate all the hopes i have to avoid
this solmes yet it is not at all likely that this very agent of mr 
lovelace acts a double part between my brother and him how else can our
family know so soon too his menaces upon the passages they hint at 

i assured my aunt that i was too much ashamed of the treatment i met
with and that from every one's sake as well as for my own to acquaint
mr lovelace with the particulars of that treatment even were the means
of corresponding with him afforded me that i had reason to think that
if he were to know of it from me we must be upon such terms that
he would not scruple making some visits which would give me great
apprehensions they all knew i said that i had no communication
with any of my father's servants except my sister's betty barnes for
although i had a good opinion of them all and believed if left to
their own inclinations that they would be glad to serve me yet 
finding by their shy behaviour that they were under particular
direction i had forborn ever since my hannah had been so disgracefully
dismissed so much as to speak to any of them for fear i should be the
occasion of their losing their places too they must therefore account
among themselves for the intelligence mr lovelace met with since
neither my brother nor sister as betty had frequently in praise of
their open hearts informed me nor perhaps their favourite mr solmes 
were all careful before whom they spoke when they had any thing to
throw out against him or even against me whom they took great pride to
join with him on this occasion 

it was but too natural my aunt said for my friends to suppose that
he had his intelligence part of it at least from me who thinking
yourself hardly treated might complain of it if not to him to miss
howe which perhaps might be the same thing for they knew miss howe
spoke as freely of them as they could do of mr lovelace and must have
the particulars she spoke of from somebody who knew what was done here 
that this determined my father to bring the whole matter to a speedy
issue lest fatal consequences should ensue 

i perceive you are going to speak with warmth proceeded she  and so i
was  for my own part i am sure you would not write any thing if you
do write to inflame so violent a spirit but this is not the end of my
present visit 

you cannot my dear but be convinced that your father will be obeyed 
the more you contend against his will the more he thinks himself
obliged to assert his authority your mother desires me to tell you 
that if you will give her the least hopes of a dutiful compliance she
will be willing to see you in her closet just now while your father is
gone to take a walk in the garden 

astonishing perseverance said i i am tired with making declarations
and with pleadings on this subject and had hoped that my resolution
being so well known i should not have been further urged upon it 

you mistake the purport of my present visit miss  looking
gravely  heretofore you have been desired and prayed to obey and oblige
your friends entreaty is at an end they give it up now it is resolved
upon that your father's will is to be obeyed as it is fit it should 
some things are laid at your door as if you concurred with lovelace's
threatened violence to carry you off which your mother will not
believe she will tell you her own good opinion of you she will tell
you how much she still loves you and what she expects of you on
the approaching occasion but yet that she may not be exposed to an
opposition which would the more provoke her she desires that you will
first assure her that you go down with a resolution to do that with a
grace which must be done with or without a grace and besides she wants
to give you some advice how to proceed in order to reconcile yourself
to your father and to every body else will you go down miss clary or
will you not 

i said i should think myself happy could i be admitted to my mother's
presence after so long a banishment from it but that i could not wish
it upon those terms 

and this is your answer niece 

it must be my answer madam come what may i never will have mr 
solmes it is cruel to press this matter so often upon me i never will
have that man 

down she went with displeasure i could not help it i was quite tired
with so many attempts all to the same purpose i am amazed that they
are not so little variation and no concession on either side 


i will go down and deposit this for betty has seen i have been writing 
the saucy creature took a napkin and dipt it in water and with a
fleering air here miss holding the wet corner to me 

what's that for said i 

only miss one of the fingers of your right-hand if you please to look
at it 

it was inky 

i gave her a look but said nothing 

but lest i should have another search i will close here 

cl harlowe 




letter xli

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday one o'clock 


i have a letter from mr lovelace full of transports vows and
promises i will send it to you enclosed you'll see how he engages
in it for lady betty's protection and for miss charlotte montague's
accompanying me i have nothing to do but to persevere he says and
prepare to receive the personal congratulations of his whole family 

but you'll see how he presumes upon my being his as the consequence of
throwing myself into that lady's protection 

the chariot and six is to be ready at the place he mentions you'll see
as to the slur upon my reputation about which i am so apprehensive how
boldly he argues  generously enough indeed were i to be his and had
given him to believe that i would but that i have not done 

how one step brings on another with this encroaching sex how soon a
young creature who gives a man the least encouragement be carried
beyond her intentions and out of her own power you would imagine by
what he writes that i have given him reason to think that my aversion
to mr solmes is all owing to my favour for him 

the dreadful thing is that comparing what he writes from his
intelligencer of what is designed against me though he seems not to
know the threatened day with what my aunt and betty assure me of there
can be no hope for me but that i must be solmes's wife if i stay here 

i had better have gone to my uncle antony's at this rate i should
have gained time at least by it this is the fruit of his fine
contrivances 

what we are to do and how good he is to be how i am to direct all his
future steps  all this shews as i said before that he is sure of me 

however i have replied to the following effect that although i had
given him room to expect that i would put myself into the protection
of one of the ladies of his family yet as i have three days to come 
between this and monday and as i still hope that my friends will
relent or that mr solmes will give up a point they will find
impossible to carry i shall not look upon myself as absolutely bound
by the appointment and expect therefore if i recede that i shall not
again be called to account for it by him that i think it necessary
to acquaint him that if my throwing myself upon lady betty lawrance's
protection as he proposed he understands that i mean directly to put
myself into his power he is very much mistaken for that there are many
point in which i must be satisfied several matters to be adjusted even
after i have left this house if i do leave it before i can think of
giving him any particular encouragement that in the first place he must
expect that i will do my utmost to procure my father's reconciliation
and approbation of my future steps and that i will govern myself
entirely by his commands in every reasonable point as much as if i had
not left his house that if he imagines i shall not reserve to myself
this liberty but that my withdrawing is to give him any advantages
which he would not otherwise have had i am determined to stay where i
am and abide the event in hopes that my friends will still accept
of my reiterated promise never to marry him or any body else without
their consent 

this i will deposit as soon as i can and as he thinks things are near
their crisis i dare say it will not be long before i have an answer to
it 


friday four o'clock 

i am really ill i was used to make the best of any little accidents
that befel me for fear of making my then affectionate friends uneasy 
but now i shall make the worst of my indisposition in hopes to obtain a
suspension of the threatened evil of wednesday next and if i do obtain
it will postpone my appointment with mr lovelace 

betty has told them that i am very much indisposed but i have no pity
from any body 

i believe i am become the object of every one's aversion and that they
would all be glad if i were dead indeed i believe it what ails the
perverse creature  cries one is she love-sick  another 

i was in the ivy summer-house and came out shivering with cold as
if aguishly affected betty observed this and reported it o no
matter let her shiver on cold cannot hurt her obstinacy will defend
her from harm perverseness is a bracer to a love-sick girl and more
effectual than the cold bath to make hardy although the constitution be
ever so tender 

this was said by a cruel brother and heard said by the dearer friends
of one for whom but a few months ago every body was apprehensive at
the least blast of wind to which she exposed herself 

betty it must be owned has an admirable memory on these occasions 
nothing of this nature is lost by her repetition even the very air with
which she repeats what she hears said renders it unnecessary to ask 
who spoke this or that severe thing 


friday six o'clock 

my aunt who again stays all night just left me she came to tell me
the result of my friends' deliberations about me it is this 

next wednesday morning they are all to be assembled to wit my father 
mother my uncles herself and my uncle hervey my brother and sister
of course my good mrs norton is likewise to be admitted and dr lewen
is to be at hand to exhort me it seems if there be occasion but my
aunt is not certain whether he is to be among them or to tarry till
called in 

when this awful court is assembled the poor prisoner is to be brought
in supported by mrs norton who is to be first tutored to instruct me
in the duty of a child which it seems i have forgotten 

nor is the success at all doubted my aunt says since it is not
believed that i can be hardened enough to withstand the expostulations
of so venerable a judicature although i have withstood those of several
of them separately and still the less as she hints at extraordinary
condescensions from my father but what condescensions even from my
father can induce me to make such a sacrifice as is expected from me 

yet my spirits will never bear up i doubt at such a tribunal my
father presiding in it 

indeed i expected that my trials would not be at an end till he had
admitted me into his awful presence 

what is hoped from me she says is that i will cheerfully on tuesday
night if not before sign the articles and so turn the succeeding
day's solemn convention into a day of festivity i am to have the
license sent me up however and once more the settlements that i may
see how much in earnest they are 

she further hinted that my father himself would bring up the
settlements for me to sign 

o my dear what a trial will this be how shall i be able to refuse my
father the writing of my name to my father from whose presence i
have been so long banished he commanding and entreating perhaps in a
breath how shall i be able to refuse this to my father 

they are sure she says something is working on mr lovelace's part 
and perhaps on mine and my father would sooner follow to the grave 
than see me his wife 

i said i was not well that the very apprehensions of these trials were
already insupportable to me and would increase upon me as the time
approached and i was afraid i should be extremely ill 

they had prepared themselves for such an artifice as that was my aunt's
unkind word and she could assure me it would stand me in no stead 

artifice repeated i and this from my aunt hervey 

why my dear said she do you think people are fools can they not see
how dismally you endeavour to sigh yourself down within-doors how you
hang down your sweet face  those were the words she was pleased to use 
upon your bosom how you totter as it were and hold by this chair 
and by that door post when you know that any body sees you  this my
dear miss howe is an aspersion to fasten hypocrisy and contempt upon
me my brother's or sister's aspersion i am not capable of arts so
low   but the moment you are down with your poultry or advancing upon
your garden-walk and as you imagine out of every body's sight it is
seem how nimbly you trip along and what an alertness governs all your
motions 

i should hate myself said i were i capable of such poor artifices as
these i must be a fool to use them as well as a mean creature for
have i not had experience enough that my friends are incapable of being
moved in much more affecting instances but you'll see how i shall be
by tuesday 


my dear you will not offer any violence to your health i hope god
has given you more grace than to do that 

i hope he has madam but there is violence enough offered and
threatened to affect my health and so it will be found without my
needing to have recourse to any other or to artifice either 

i'll only tell you one thing my dear and that is ill or well the
ceremony will probably be performed before wednesday night but this 
also i will tell you although beyond my present commission that mr 
solmes will be under an engagement if you should require it of him as
a favour after the ceremony is passed and lovelace's hopes thereby
utterly extinguished to leave you at your father's and return to his
own house every evening until you are brought to a full sense of your
duty and consent to acknowledge your change of name 

there was no opening of my lips to such a speech as this i was dumb 

and these my dear miss howe are they who some of them at least have
called me a romantic girl this is my chimerical brother and wise
sister both joining their heads together i dare say and yet my aunt
told me that the last part was what took in my mother who had till
that last expedient was found out insisted that her child should not
be married if through grief or opposition she should be ill or fall
into fits 

this intended violence my aunt often excused by the certain information
they pretended to have of some plots or machinations that were
ready to break out from mr lovelace the effects of which were thus
cunningly to be frustrated 


 it may not be amiss to observe in this place that mr 
 lovelace artfully contrived to drive the family on by
 permitting his and their agent leman to report machinations 
 which he had neither intention nor power to execute 


friday nine o'clock 

and now my dear what shall i conclude upon you see how
determined but how can i expect your advice will come time enough
to stand me in any stead for here i have been down and already have
another letter from mr lovelace  the man lives upon the spot i think  
and i must write to him either that i will or will not stand to my
first resolution of escaping hence on monday next if i let him know
that i will not appearances so strong against him and for solmes even
stronger than when i made the appointment will it not be justly deemed
my own fault if i am compelled to marry their odious man and if any
mischief ensue from mr lovelace's rage and disappointment will it not
lie at my door yet he offers so fair yet on the other hand to
incur the censure of the world as a giddy creature but that as he
hints i have already incurred what can i do oh that my cousin
morden but what signifies wishing 

i will here give you the substance of mr lovelace's letter the letter
itself i will send when i have answered it but that i will defer doing
as long as i can in hopes of finding reason to retract an appointment
on which so much depends and yet it is necessary you should have all
before you as i go along that you may be the better able to advise me
in this dreadful crisis 

he begs my pardon for writing with so much assurance attributing it to
his unbounded transport and entirely acquiesces to me in my will he is
full of alternatives and proposals he offers to attend me directly to
lady betty's or if i had rather to my own estate and that my lord
m shall protect me there   he knows not my dear my reasons for
rejecting this inconsiderate advice   in either case as soon as he
sees me safe he will go up to london or whither i please and not
come near me but by my own permission and till i am satisfied in every
thing i am doubtful of as well with regard to his reformation as to
settlements etc 

to conduct me to you my dear is another of his proposals not
doubting he says but your mother will receive me or if that be not
agreeable to you or to your mother or to me he will put me into mr 
hickman's protection whom no doubt he says you can influence and
that it may be given out that i have gone to bath or bristol or
abroad wherever i please 


 see note in letter v of this volume 


again if it be more agreeable he proposes to attend me privately to
london where he will procure handsome lodgings for me and both his
cousins montague to receive me in them and to accompany me till
all shall be adjusted to my mind and till a reconciliation shall
be effected which he assures me nothing shall be wanting in him to
facilitate greatly as he has been insulted by all my family 

these several measures he proposes to my choice as it was unlikely 
he says that he could procure in the time a letter from lady betty 
under her own hand to invite me in form to her house unless he
had been himself to go to that lady for it which at this critical
juncture while he is attending my commands is impossible 

he conjures me in the most solemn manner if i would not throw him
into utter despair to keep to my appointment 

however instead of threatening my relations or solmes if i recede 
he respectfully says that he doubts not but that if i do it will be
upon the reason as he ought to be satisfied with upon no slighter 
he hopes than their leaving me at full liberty to pursue my own
inclinations in which whatever they shall be he will entirely
acquiesce only endeavouring to make his future good behaviour the sole
ground for his expectation of my favour 

in short he solemnly vows that his whole view at present is to free
me from my imprisonment and to restore me to my future happiness he
declares that neither the hopes he has of my future favour nor the
consideration of his own and his family's honour will permit him to
propose any thing that shall be inconsistent with my own most scrupulous
notions and for my mind's sake should choose to have the proposed end
obtained by my friends declining to compel me but that nevertheless as
to the world's opinion it is impossible to imagine that the behaviour
of my relations to me has not already brought upon my family those
free censures which they deserve and caused the step which i am so
scrupulous about taking to be no other than the natural and expected
consequence of their treatment of me 

indeed i am afraid all this is true and it is owing to some little
degree of politeness that mr lovelace does not say all he might on
this subject for i have no doubt that i am the talk and perhaps the
bye-word of half the county if so i am afraid i can now do nothing
that will give me more disgrace than i have already so causelessly
received by their indiscreet persecutions and let me be whose i
will and do what i will i shall never wipe off the stain which my
confinement and the rigorous usage i have received have fixed upon me 
at least in my own opinion 

i wish if ever i am to be considered as one of the eminent family this
man is allied to some of them do not think the worse of me for the
disgrace i have received in that case perhaps i shall be obliged to
him if he do not you see how much this harsh this cruel treatment
from my own family has humbled me but perhaps i was too much exalted
before 

mr lovelace concludes with repeatedly begging an interview with me 
and that this night if possible an hour he says he is the more
encouraged to solicit for as i had twice before made him hope for it 
but whether he obtain it or not he beseeches me to choose one of the
alternatives he offers to my acceptance and not to depart from my
resolution of escaping on monday unless the reason ceases on which i
had taken it up and that i have a prospect of being restored to
the favour of my friends at least to my own liberty and freedom of
choice 

he renews all his vows and promises on this head in so earnest and so
solemn a manner that his own interest and his family's honour and
their favour for me co-operating i can have no room to doubt of his
sincerity 




letter xlii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sat morn eight o'clock april 8 

whether you will blame me or not i cannot tell but i have deposited
a letter confirming my resolution to leave this house on monday next 
within the hour mentioned in my former if possible i have not kept a
copy of it but this is the substance 

i tell him that i have no way to avoid the determined resolution of
my friends in behalf of mr solmes but by abandoning this house by his
assistance 

i have not pretended to make a merit with him on this score for i
plainly tell him that could i without an unpardonable sin die when i
would i would sooner make death my choice than take a step which all
the world if not my own heart would condemn me for taking 

i tell him that i shall not try to bring any other clothes with me
than those i shall have on and those but my common wearing-apparel 
lest i should be suspected that i must expect to be denied the
possession of my estate but that i am determined never to consent to a
litigation with my father were i to be reduced to ever so low a state 
so that the protection i am to be obliged for to any one must be alone
for the distress sake that therefore he will have nothing to hope for
from this step that he had not before and that in ever light i
reserve to myself to accept or refuse his address as his behaviour and
circumspection shall appear to me to deserve 

i tell him that i think it best to go into a private lodging in the
neighbourhood of lady betty lawrance and not to her ladyship's house 
that it may not appear to the world that i have refuged myself in his
family and that a reconciliation with my friends may not on that
account be made impracticable that i will send for thither my faithful
hannah and apprize only miss howe where i am that he shall instantly
leave me and go to london or to one of lord m s seats and as he had
promised not to come near me but by my leave contenting himself with a
correspondence by letter only 

that if i find myself in danger of being discovered and carried back
by violence i will then throw myself directly into the protection
either of lady betty or lady sarah but this only in case of absolute
necessity for that it will be more to my reputation for me by the
best means i can taking advantage of my privacy to enter by a second
or third hand into a treaty of reconciliation with my friends 

that i must however plainly tell him that if in this treaty my
friends insist upon my resolving against marrying him i will engage
to comply with them provided they will allow me to promise him that i
will never be the wife of any other man while he remains single or is
living that this is a compliment i am willing to pay him in return for
the trouble and pains he has taken and the usage he has met with on
my account although i intimate that he may in a great measure thank
himself by reason of the little regard he has paid to his reputation 
for the slights he has met with 

i tell him that i may in this privacy write to my cousin morden 
and if possible interest him in my cause 

i take some brief notice then of his alternatives 

you must think my dear that this unhappy force upon me and this
projected flight make it necessary for me to account to him much sooner
than i should otherwise choose to do for every part of my conduct 

it is not to be expected i tell him that your mother will embroil
herself or suffer you or mr hickman to be embroiled on my account 
and as to his proposal of my going to london i am such an absolute
stranger to every body there and have such a bad opinion of the place 
that i cannot by any means think of going thither except i should be
induced some time hence by the ladies of his family to attend them 

as to the meeting he is desirous of i think it by no means proper 
especially as it is so likely that i may soon see him but that if any
thing occurs to induce me to change my mind as to withdrawing i will
then take the first opportunity to see him and give him my reasons for
that change 

this my dear i the less scrupled to write as it might qualify him to
bear such a disappointment should i give it him he having besides 
behaved so very unexceptionably when he surprised me some time ago in
the lonely wood-house 

finally i commend myself as a person in distress and merely as such 
to his honour and to the protection of the ladies of his family i
repeat  most cordially i am sure   my deep concern for being forced to
take a step so disagreeable and so derogatory to my honour and having
told him that i will endeavour to obtain leave to dine in the ivy
summer-house and to send betty of some errand when there i leave the
rest to him but imagine that about four o'clock will be a proper time
for him to contrive some signal to let me know he is at hand and for me
to unbolt the garden-door 


 the ivy summer-house or ivy bower as it was sometimes
 called in the family was a place that from a girl this
 young lady delighted in she used in the summer months 
 frequently to sit and work and read and write and draw 
 and when permitted to breakfast and dine and sometimes
 to sup in it especially when miss howe who had an equal
 liking to it was her visiter and guest 

she describes it in another letter which appears not as pointing to
a pretty variegated landscape of wood water and hilly country which
had pleased her so much that she had drawn it the piece hanging up in
her parlous among some of her other drawings 


i added by way of postscript that their suspicions seeming to
increase i advise him to contrive to send or some to the usual place 
as frequently as possible in the interval of time till monday morning
ten or eleven o'clock as something may possibly happen to make me alter
my mind 

o my dear miss howe what a sad sad thing is the necessity forced
upon me for all this preparation and contrivance but it is now too
late but how too late did i say what a word is that what a
dreadful thing were i to repent to find it to be too late to remedy
the apprehended evil 


saturday ten o'clock 

mr solmes is here he is to dine with his new relations as betty tells
me he already calls them 

he would have thrown himself in my way once more but i hurried up to my
prison in my return from my garden-walk to avoid him 

i had when in the garden the curiosity to see if my letter were gone 
i cannot say with an intention to take it back again if it were not 
because i see not how i could do otherwise than i have done yet what a
caprice when i found it gone i began as yesterday morning to wish it
had not for no other reason i believe than because it was out of my
power 

a strange diligence in this man he says he almost lives upon the
place and i think so too 

he mentions as you will see in his letter four several disguises 
which he puts on in one day it is a wonder nevertheless that he has
not been seen by some of our tenants for it is impossible that any
disguise can hide the gracefulness of his figure but this is to be
said that the adjoining grounds being all in our own hands and no
common foot-paths near that part of the garden and through the park and
coppice nothing can be more bye and unfrequented 

then they are less watchful i believe over my garden-walks and my
poultry-visits depending as my aunt hinted upon the bad character
they have taken so much pains to fasten upon mr lovelace this they
think and justly think must fill me with doubts and then the regard
i have hitherto had for my reputation is another of their securities 
were it not for these two they would not surely have used me as they
have done and at the same time left me the opportunities which i have
several times had to get away had i been disposed to do so and 
indeed their dependence on both these motives would have been well
founded had they kept but tolerable measures with me 


 they might no doubt make a dependence upon the reasons
 she gives but their chief reliance was upon the vigilance
 of their joseph leman little imagining what an implement he
 was of mr lovelace 


then perhaps they have no notion of the back-door as it is seldom
opened and leads to a place so pathless and lonesome if not there
can be no other way to escape if one would unless by the plashy lane 
so full of springs by which your servant reaches the solitary wood
house to which lane one must descend from a high bank that bounds the
poultry yard for as to the front-way you know one must pass through
the house to that and in sight of the parlours and the servants' hall 
and then have the open courtyard to go through and by means of the
iron-gate be full in view as one passes over the lawn for a quarter
of a mile together the young plantations of elms and limes affording
yet but little shade or covert 


 this in another of her letters which neither is
 inserted is thus described a piece of ruins upon it 
 the remains of an old chapel now standing in the midst of
 the coppice here and there an over-grown oak surrounded
 with ivy and mistletoe starting up to sanctify as it
 were the awful solemnness of the place a spot too where
 a man having been found hanging some years ago it was used
 to be thought of by us when children and by the maid-
 servants with a degree of terror it being actually the
 habitation of owls ravens and other ominous birds as
 haunted by ghosts goblins specters the genuine result of
 the country loneliness and ignorance notions which early
 propagated are apt to leave impressions even upon minds
 grown strong enough at the same time to despise the like
 credulous follies in others 


the ivy summer-house is the most convenient for this heart-affecting
purpose of any spot in the garden as it is not far from the back-door 
and yet in another alley as you may remember then it is seldom
resorted to by any body else except in the summer-months because it is
cool when they loved me they would often for this reason object to
my long continuance in it but now it is no matter what becomes of me 
besides cold is a bracer as my brother said yesterday 

here i will deposit what i have written let me have your prayers my
dear and your approbation or your censure of the steps i have taken 
for yet it may not be quite too late to revoke the appointment i am

your most affectionate and faithful cl harlowe 

why will you send your servant empty-handed 




letter xliii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe sat afternoon 


by your last date of ten o'clock in your letter of this day you could
not long have deposited it before robin took it he rode hard and
brought it to be just as i had risen from table 

you may justly blame me for sending my messenger empty-handed your
situation considered and yet that very situation so critical is
partly the reason for it for indeed i knew not what to write fit to
send you 

i have been inquiring privately how to procure you a conveyance from
harlowe-place and yet not appear in it knowing that to oblige in
the fact and to disoblige in the manner is but obliging by halves my
mother being moreover very suspicious and very uneasy made more so by
daily visits from your uncle antony who tells her that every thing
is now upon the point of being determined and hopes that her daughter
will not so interfere as to discourage your compliance with their
wills this i came at by a way that i cannot take notice of or both
should hear of it in a manner neither would like and without that my
mother and i have had almost hourly bickerings 

i found more difficulty than i expected as the time was confined and
secrecy required and as you so earnestly forbid me to accompany you in
your enterprise in procuring you a vehicle had you not obliged me to
keep measures with my mother i could have managed it with ease i could
even have taken our own chariot on one pretence or other and put two
horses extraordinary to it if i had thought fit and i could when we
had got to london have sent it back and nobody the wiser as to the
lodgings we might have taken 

i wish to the lord you had permitted this indeed i think you are too
punctilious a great deal for you situation would you expect to enjoy
yourself with your usual placidness and not to be ruffled in an
hurricane which every moment threatens to blow your house down 

had your distress sprung from yourself that would have been another
thing but when all the world knows where to lay the fault this alters
the case 

how can you say i am happy when my mother to her power is as much an
abettor of their wickedness to my dearest friend as your aunt or any
body else and this through the instigation of that odd-headed and
foolish uncle of yours who  sorry creature that he is   keeps her up
to resolutions which are unworthy of her for an example to me if it
please you is not this cause enough for me to ground a resentment upon 
sufficient to justify me for accompanying you the friendship between us
so well known 

indeed my dear the importance of the case considered i must repeat 
that you are too nice don't they already think that your non-compliance
with their odious measures is owing a good deal to my advice have they
not prohibited our correspondence upon that very surmise and have i 
but on your account reason to value what they think 

besides what discredit have i to fear by such a step what detriment 
would hickman do you believe refuse me upon it if he did should
i be sorry for that who is it that has a soul who would not be
affected by such an instance of female friendship 

but i should vex and disorder my mother well that is something but
not more than she vexes and disorders me on her being made an implement
by such a sorry creature who ambles hither every day in spite to my
dearest friend woe be to both if it be for a double end chide me if
you will i don't care 

i say and i insist upon it such a step would ennoble your friend and
if still you will permit it i will take the office out of lovelace's
hands and to-morrow evening or on monday before his time of
appointment takes place will come in a chariot or chaise and then 
my dear if we get off as i wish will we make terms and what terms we
please with them all my mother will be glad to receive her daughter
again i warrant and hickman will cry for joy on my return or he shall
for sorrow 

but you are so very earnestly angry with me for proposing such a step 
and have always so much to say for your side of any question that i am
afraid to urge it farther only be so good let me add as to encourage
me to resume it if upon farther consideration and upon weighing
matters well and in this light whether best to go off with me 
or with lovelace you can get over your punctilious regard for my
reputation a woman going away with a woman is not so discreditable a
thing surely and with no view but to avoid the fellows i say only
to be so good as to consider this point and if you can get over your
scruples on my account do and so i will have done with this argument
for the present and apply myself to some of the passages in yours 

a time i hope will come that i shall be able to read your affecting
narratives without the impatient bitterness which now boils over in my
heart and would flow to my pen were i to enter into the particulars of
what you write and indeed i am afraid of giving you my advice at all 
or telling you what i should do in your case supposing you will still
refuse my offer finding too what you have been brought or rather driven
to without it lest any evil should follow it in which case i
should never forgive myself and this consideration has added to my
difficulties in writing to you now you are upon such a crisis and yet
refuse the only method but i said i would not for the present touch
any more that string yet one word more chide me if you please if any
harm betide you i shall for ever blame my mother indeed i shall and
perhaps yourself if you do not accept my offer 

but one thing in your present situation and prospects let me advise 
it is this that if you do go off with mr lovelace you take the first
opportunity to marry why should you not when every body will know by
whose assistance and in whose company you leave your father's house 
go whithersoever you will you may indeed keep him at a distance until
settlements are drawn and such like matters are adjusted to your mind 
but even these are matters of less consideration in your particular
case than they would be in that of most others and first because be
his other faults what they will nobody thinks him an ungenerous man 
next because the possession of your estate must be given up to you
as soon as your cousin morden comes who as your trustee will see
it done and done upon proper terms 3dly because there is no want of
fortune on his side 4thly because all his family value you and are
extremely desirous that you should be their relation 5thly because he
makes no scruple of accepting you without conditions you see how he has
always defied your relations  i for my own part can forgive him for
the fault nor know i if it be not a noble one   and i dare say he
had rather call you his without a shilling than be under obligation
to those whom he has full as little reason to love as they have to love
him you have heard that his own relations cannot make his proud spirit
submit to owe any favour to them 

for all these reasons i think you may the less stand upon previous
settlements it is therefore my absolute opinion that if you do
withdraw with him and in that case you must let him be judge when he
can leave you with safety you'll observe that you should not postpone
the ceremony 

give this matter your most serious consideration punctilio is out of
doors the moment you are out of your father's house i know how justly
severe you have been upon those inexcusable creatures whose giddiness
and even want of decency have made them in the same hour as i may
say leap from a parent's window to a husband's bed but considering
lovelace's character i repeat my opinion that your reputation in the
eye of the world requires no delay be made in this point when once you
are in his power 

i need not i am sure make a stronger plea to you 

you say in excuse for my mother what my fervent love for my friend
very ill brooks that we ought not to blame any one for not doing what
she has an opinion to do or to let alone this in cases of friendship 
would admit of very strict discussion if the thing requested be of
greater consequence or even of equal to the person sought to and it
were as the old phrase has it to take a thorn out of one's friend's
foot to put in into one's own something might be said nay it would
be i will venture to say a selfish thing in us to ask a favour of
a friend which would subject that friend to the same or equal
inconvenience as that from which we wanted to be relieved the requested
would in this case teach his friend by his own selfish example with
much better reason to deny him and despise a friendship so merely
nominal but if by a less inconvenience to ourselves we could relieve
our friend from a greater the refusal of such a favour makes the
refuser unworthy of the name of friend nor would i admit such a one 
not even into the outermost fold of my heart 

i am well aware that this is your opinion of friendship as well as
mine for i owe the distinction to you upon a certain occasion and it
saved me from a very great inconvenience as you must needs remember 
but you were always for making excuses for other people in cases
wherein you would not have allowed of one for yourself 

i must own that were these excuses for a friend's indifference or
denial made by any body but you in a case of such vast importance to
herself and of so comparative a small one to those for whose protection
she would be thought to wish i who am for ever as you have often
remarked endeavouring to trace effects to their causes should be
ready to suspect that there was a latent unowned inclination which
balancing or preponderating rather made the issue of the alternative
 however important sit more lightly upon the excuser's mind than she
cared to own 

you will understand me my dear but if you do not it may be well for
me for i am afraid i shall have it from you for but starting such a
notion or giving a hint which perhaps as you did once in another
case you will reprimandingly call not being able to forego the
ostentation of sagacity though at the expense of that tenderness which
is due to friendship and charity 

what signifies owning a fault without mending it you'll say very
true my dear but you know i ever was a saucy creature ever stood in
need of great allowances and i remember likewise that i ever had
them from my dear clarissa nor do i doubt them now for you know how
much i love you if it be possible more than myself i love you believe
me my dear and in consequence of that belief you will be able to
judge how much i am affected by your present distressful and critical
situation which will not suffer me to pass by without a censure even
that philosophy of temper in your own cause which you have not in
another's and which all that know you ever admired you for 

from this critical and distressful situation it shall be my hourly
prayers that you may be delivered without blemish to that fair fame
which has hitherto like your heart been unspotted 

with this prayer twenty times repeated concludes your ever
affectionate anna howe 

i hurried myself in writing this and i hurry robin away with it that 
in a situation so very critical you may have all the time possible to
consider what i have written upon two points so very important i will
repeat them in a very few words 

whether you choose not rather to go off with one of your own sex with
your anna howe than with one of the other with mr lovelace 

and if not 

whether you should not marry him as soon as possible 




letter xliv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe  the preceding letter not received  
saturday afternoon 


already have i an ecstatic answer as i may call it to my letter 

he promises compliance with my will in every article approves of all
i propose particularly of the private lodging and thinks it a happy
expedient to obviate the censures of the busy and the unreflecting and
yet he hopes that the putting myself into the protection of either of
his aunts treated as i am treated would be far from being looked
upon by any body in a disreputable light but every thing i enjoin
or resolve upon must he says be right not only with respect to my
present but future reputation with regard to which he hopes so to
behave himself as to be allowed to be next to myself more properly
solicitous than any body he will only assure me that his whole family
are extremely desirous to take advantage of the persecutions i labour
under to make their court and endear themselves to me by their best
and most cheerful services happy if they can in any measure contribute
to my present freedom and future happiness 

he will this afternoon he says write to lord m and to lady betty and
lady sarah that he is now within view of being the happiest man in the
world if it be not his own fault since the only woman upon earth that
can make him so will be soon out of danger of being another man's and
cannot possibly prescribe any terms to him that he shall not think it
his duty to comply with 

he flatters himself now my last letter confirming my resolution that
he can be in no apprehension of my changing my mind unless my friends
change their manner of acting by me which he is too sure they will
not and now will all his relations who take such a kind and generous
share in his interests glory and pride themselves in the prospects he
has before him 


 well might he be so sure when he had the art to play them
 off by his corrupted agent and to make them all join to
 promote his views unknown to themselves as is shewn in some
 of his preceding letters 


thus does he hold me to it 

as to fortune he begs me not to be solicitous on that score that his
own estate is sufficient for us both not a nominal but a real two
thousand pounds per annum equivalent to some estates reputed a third
more that it never was encumbered that he is clear of the world both
as to book and bond debts thanks perhaps to his pride more than to
his virtue that lord m moreover resolves to settle upon him a thousand
pounds per annum on his nuptials and to this he will have it his
lordship is instigated more by motives of justice than of generosity as
he must consider it was but an equivalent for an estate which he had
got possession of to which his mr lovelace's mother had better
pretensions that his lordship also proposed to give him up either
his seat in hertfordshire or that in lancashire at his own or at his
wife's option especially if i am the person all which it will be in my
power to see done and proper settlements drawn before i enter into any
farther engagements with him if i will have it so 

he says that i need not be under any solicitude as to apparel all
immediate occasions of that sort will be most cheerfully supplied by the
ladies of his family as my others shall with the greatest pride and
pleasure if i allow him that honour by himself 

he assures me that i shall govern him as i please with regard to any
thing in his power towards effecting a reconciliation with my friends 
a point he knows my heart is set upon 

he is afraid that the time will hardly allow of his procuring miss
charlotte montague's attendance upon me at st alban's as he had
proposed she should because he understands she keeps her chamber with
a violent cold and sore throat but both she and her sister the first
moment she is able to go abroad shall visit me at my private lodgings 
and introduce me to lady sarah and lady betty or those ladies to me as
i shall choose and accompany me to town if i please and stay as long
in it with me as i shall think fit to stay there 

lord m will also at my own time and in my own manner that is to
say either publicly or privately make me a visit and for his own
part when he has seen me in safety either in their protection or in
the privacy i prefer he will leave me and not attempt to visit me but
by my own permission 

he had thought once he says on hearing of his cousin charlotte's
indisposition to have engaged his cousin patty's attendance upon me 
either in or about the neighbouring village or at st alban's but he
says she is a low-spirited timorous girl and would but the more have
perplexed us 

so my dear the enterprise requires courage and high spirits you
see and indeed it does what am i about to do 

he himself it is plain thinks it necessary that i should be
accompanied with one of my own sex he might at least have proposed
the woman of one of the ladies of his family lord bless me what am i
about to do 


 


after all as far as i have gone i know not but i may still recede 
and if i do a mortal quarrel i suppose will ensue and what if it
does could there be any way to escape this solmes a breach with
lovelace might make way for the single life to take place which i
so much prefer and then i would defy the sex for i see nothing but
trouble and vexation that they bring upon ours and when once entered 
one is obliged to go on with them treading with tender feet upon
thorns and sharper thorns to the end of a painful journey 

what to do i know not the more i think the more i am embarrassed and
the stronger will be my doubts as the appointed time draws near 

but i will go down and take a little turn in the garden and deposit
this and his letters all but the two last which i will enclose in my
next if i have opportunity to write another 

mean time my dear friend but what can i desire you to pray
for adieu then let me only say adieu 




letter xlv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe  in answer to letter xliii   sunday
morning april 9 


do not think my beloved friend although you have given me in yours
of yesterday a severer instance of what nevertheless i must call your
impartial love than ever yet i received from you that i would be
displeased with you for it that would be to put myself into the
inconvenient situation of royalty that is to say out of the way of
ever being told of my faults of ever mending them and in the way of
making the sincerest and warmest friendship useless to me 

and then how brightly how nobly glows in your bosom the sacred flame
of friendship since it can make you ready to impute to the unhappy
sufferer a less degree of warmth in her own cause than you have for
her because of the endeavours to divest herself of self so far as to
leave others to the option which they have a right to make ought i my
dear to blame ought i not rather to admire you for this ardor 

but nevertheless lest you should think that there is any foundation for
a surmise which although it owe its rise to your friendship would if
there were leave me utterly inexcusable i must in justice to myself 
declare that i know not my own heart if i have any of that latent or
unowned inclination which you would impute to any other but me nor
does the important alternative sit lightly on my mind and yet i must
excuse your mother were it but on this single consideration that
i could not presume to reckon upon her favour as i could upon her
daughter's so as to make the claim of friendship upon her to whom as
the mother of my dearest friend a veneration is owing which can
hardly be compatible with that sweet familiarity which is one of the
indispensable requisites of the sacred tie by which your heart and mine
are bound in one 

what therefore i might expect from my anna howe i ought not from
her mother for would it not be very strange that a person of her
experience should be reflected upon because she gave not up her own
judgment where the consequence of her doing so would be to embroil
herself as she apprehends with a family she has lived well with 
and in behalf of a child against her parents as she has moreover a
daughter of her own a daughter too give me leave to say of whose
vivacity and charming spirits she is more apprehensive than she need to
be because her truly maternal cares make her fear more from her youth 
than she hopes for her prudence which nevertheless she and all the
world know to be beyond her years 

and here let me add that whatever you may generously and as the result
of an ardent affection for your unhappy friend urge on this head in my
behalf or harshly against any one who may refuse me protection in the
extraordinary circumstances i find myself in i have some pleasure
in being able to curb undue expectations upon my indulgent friends 
whatever were to befal myself from those circumstances for i should be
extremely mortified were i by my selfish forwardness to give occasion
for such a check as to be told that i had encouraged an unreasonable
hope or according to the phrase you mention wished to take a thorn
out of my own foot and to put in to that of my friend nor should i
be better pleased with myself if having been taught by my good mrs 
norton that the best of schools is that of affliction i should rather
learn impatience than the contrary by the lessons i am obliged to get
by heart in it and if i should judge of the merits of others as they
were kind to me and that at the expense of their own convenience or
peace of mind for is not this to suppose myself ever in the right and
all who do not act as i would have them act perpetually in the wrong 
in short to make my sake god's sake in the sense of mr solmes's
pitiful plea to me 

how often my dear have you and i endeavoured to detect and censure
this partial spirit in others 

but i know you do not always content yourself with saying what you think
may justly be said but in order the shew the extent of a penetration
which can go to the bottom of any subject delight to say or to write
all that can be said or written or even thought on the particular
occasion and this partly perhaps from being desirous  pardon me my
dear   to be thought mistress of a sagacity that is aforehand with
events but who would wish to drain off or dry up a refreshing current 
because it now-and-then puts us to some little inconvenience by its
over-flowings in other words who would not allow for the liveliness of
a spirit which for one painful sensibility gives an hundred pleasurable
ones and the one in consequence of the other 

but now i come to the two points in your letter which most sensibly
concern me thus you put them 

whether i choose not rather to go off  shocking words   with one of
my own sex with my anna howe than with one of the other with mr 
lovelace 

and if not 

whether i should not marry him as soon as possible 

you know my dear my reasons for rejecting your proposal and even
for being earnest that you should not be known to be assisting me in an
enterprise in which a cruel necessity induced me to think of engaging 
and for which you have not the same plea at this rate well might
your mother be uneasy at our correspondence not knowing to what
inconveniencies it might subject her and you if i am hardly excusable
to think of withdrawing from my unkind friends what could you have to
say for yourself were you to abandon a mother so indulgent does
she suspect that your fervent friendship may lead you to a small
indiscretion and does this suspicion offend you and would you in
resentment shew her and the world that you can voluntarily rush into
the highest error that any of our sex can be guilty of 

and is it worthy of your generosity  i ask you my dear is it   to
think of taking so undutiful a step because you believe your mother
would be glad to receive you again 

i do assure you that were i to take this step myself i would run all
risks rather than you should accompany me in it have i do you think a
desire to double and treble my own fault in the eye of the world in the
eye of that world which cruelly as i am used not knowing all would
not acquit me 

but my dearest kindest friend let me tell you that we will neither
of us take such a step the manner of putting your questions abundantly
convinces me that i ought not in your opinion to attempt it you no
doubt intend that i shall so take it and i thank you for the equally
polite and forcible conviction 

it is some satisfaction to me taking the matter in this light that i
had begun to waver before i received your last and now i tell you that
it has absolutely determined me not to go off at least not to-morrow 

if you my dear think the issue of the alternative to use your own
words sits so lightly upon my mind in short that my inclination is
faulty the world would treat me much less scrupulously when therefore
you represent that all punctilio must be at an end the moment i am out
of my father's house and hint that i must submit it to mr lovelace
to judge when he can leave me with safety that is to say give him the
option whether he will leave me or not who can bear these reflections 
who can resolve to incur these inconveniencies that has the question
still in her own power to decide upon 

while i thought only of an escape from this house as an escape from mr 
solmes that already my reputation suffered by my confinement and that
it would be in my own option either to marry mr lovelace or wholly to
renounce him bold as the step was i thought treated as i am treated 
something was to be said in excuse of it if not to the world to
myself and to be self-acquitted is a blessing to be preferred to the
option of all the world but after i have censured most severely as i
have ever done those giddy girls who have in the same hour as i may
say that they have fled from their chamber presented themselves at
the altar that is witness to their undutiful rashness after i have
stipulated with mr lovelace for time and for an ultimate option
whether to accept or refuse him and for his leaving me as soon as i am
in a place of safety which as you observe he must be the judge of 
and after he has signified to me his compliance with these terms so
that i cannot if i would recall them and suddenly marry you see 
my dear that i have nothing left me but to resolve not to go away with
him 

but how on this revocation of my appointment shall i be able to
pacify him 

how why assert the privilege of my sex surely on this side of the
solemnity he has no right to be displeased besides did i not reserve a
power of receding as i saw fit to what purpose as i asked in the case
between your mother and you has any body an option if the making use
of it shall give the refused a right to be disgusted 

far very far would those who according to the old law have a right
of absolving or confirming a child's promise be from ratifying mine 
had it been ever so solemn a one but this was rather an appointment
than a promise and suppose it had been the latter and that i had not
reserved to myself a liberty of revoking it was it to preclude better
or maturer consideration if so how unfit to be given how ungenerous
to be insisted upon and how unfitter still to be kept is there a man
living who ought to be angry that a woman whom he hopes one day to
call his shall refuse to keep a rash promise when on the maturest
deliberation she is convinced that it was a rash one 


 see numb xxx where it is declared whose vows shall be
 binding and whose not the vows of a man or of a widow 
 are there pronounced to be indispensable because they are
 sole and subject to no other domestic authority but the
 vows of a single woman or of a wife if the father of the
 one or the husband of the other disallow of them as soon
 as they know them are to be of no force 

 a matter highly necessary to be known by all young ladies
 especially whose designing addressers too often endeavour
 to engage them by vows and then plead conscience and honour
 to them to hold them down to the performance 

 it cannot be amiss to recite the very words 

 ver 3 if a woman vow a vow unto the lord and bind herself
 by a bond being in her father's house in her youth 

 4 and her father hear her vow and her bond wherewith she
 hath bound her soul and her father shall hold his peace at
 her then all her vows shall stand and every bond wherewith
 she hath bound her soul shall stand 

 5 but if her father disallow her in the day that he
 heareth not any of her vows or of her bonds wherewith she
 hath bound her soul shall stand and the lord shall forgive
 her because her father disallowed her 

 the same in the case of a wife as said above see ver 6 
 7 8 etc all is thus solemnly closed 

 ver 16 these are the statutes which the lord commanded
 moses between a man and his wife between the father and his
 daughter being yet in her youth in her father's house 


i resolve then upon the whole to stand this one trial of wednesday
next or perhaps i should rather say of tuesday evening if my father
hold his purpose of endeavouring in person to make me read or hear
read and then sign the settlements that that must be the greatest
trial of all 

if i am compelled to sign them over-night then the lord bless me 
must all i dread follow as of course on wednesday if i can prevail
upon them by my prayers  perhaps i shall fall into fits for the very
first appearance of my father after having been so long banished his
presence will greatly affect me if i say i can prevail upon them by
my prayers  to lay aside their views or to suspend the day if but for
one week but if not but for two or three days still wednesday will
be a lighter day of trial they will surely give me time to consider to
argue with myself this will not be promising as i have made no
effort to get away they have no reason to suspect me so i may have an
opportunity in the last resort to withdraw mrs norton is to be with
me she although she should be chidden for it will in my extremity 
plead for me my aunt hervey may in such an extremity join with her 
perhaps my mother may be brought over i will kneel to each one by one 
to make a friend some of them have been afraid to see me lest they
should be moved in my favour does not this give a reasonable hope that
i may move them my brother's counsel heretofore given to turn me out
of doors to my evil destiny may again be repeated and may prevail 
then shall i be in no worse case than now as to the displeasure of my
friends and thus far better that it will not be my fault that i seek
another protection which even then ought to be my cousin morden's 
rather than mr lovelace's or any other person's 

my heart in short misgives me less when i resolve this way than when
i think of the other and in so strong and involuntary a bias the heart
is as i may say conscience and well cautions the wise man let the
counsel of thine own heart stand for there is no man more faithful to
thee than it for a man's mind is sometimes wont to tell him more than
seven watchmen that sit above in a high tower  


 ecclus xxxvii 13 14 


forgive these indigested self-reasonings i will close here and
instantly set about a letter of revocation to mr lovelace take it
as he will it will only be another trial of temper to him to me of
infinite importance and has he not promised temper and acquiescence on
the supposition of a change in my mind 




letter xlvi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sunday morning april 9 


nobody it seems will go to church this day no blessing to be expected
perhaps upon views so worldly and in some so cruel 

they have a mistrust that i have some device in my head betty has been
looking among my clothes i found her on coming up from depositing my
letter to lovelace for i have written peering among them for i had
left the key in the lock she coloured and was confounded to be caught 
but i only said i should be accustomed to any sort of treatment in
time if she had her orders those were enough for her 

she owned in her confusion that a motion had been made to abridge
me of my airings and the report she should make would be of no
disadvantage to me one of my friends she told me urged in my behalf 
that there was no need of laying me under greater restraint since mr 
lovelace's threatening to rescue me by violence were i to have been
carried to my uncle's was a conviction that i had no design to go to
him voluntarily and that if i had i should have made preparations
of that kind before now and most probably had been detected in
them hence it was also inferred that there was no room to doubt 
but i would at last comply and added the bold creature if you don't
intend to do so your conduct miss seems strange to me only thus
she reconciled it that i had gone so far i knew not how to come off
genteelly and she fancied i should in full congregation on wednesday 
give mr solmes my hand and then said the confident wench as the
learned dr brand took his text last sunday there will be joy in
heaven 

this is the substance of my letter to mr lovelace 

that i have reasons of the greatest consequence to myself and which 
when known must satisfy him to suspend for the present my intention
of leaving my father's house that i have hopes that matters may be
brought to an happy conclusion without taking a step which nothing
but the last necessity could justify and that he may depend upon my
promise that i will die rather than consent to marry mr solmes 

and so i am preparing myself to stand the shock of his exclamatory
reply but be that what it will it cannot affect me so much as the
apprehensions of what may happen to me next tuesday or wednesday for
now those apprehensions engage my whole attention and make me sick at
the very heart 


sunday four in the afternoon 

my letter is not yet taken away if he should not send for it or take
it or come hither on my not meeting him to-morrow in doubt of what
may have befallen me what shall i do why had i any concerns with this
sex i that was so happy till i knew this man 

i dined in the ivy summer-house my request to do so was complied with
at the first word to shew i meant nothing i went again into the house
with betty as soon as i had dined i thought it was not amiss to ask
this liberty the weather seemed to be set in fine who knows what
tuesday or wednesday may produce 


sunday evening seven o'clock 

there remains my letter still he is busied i suppose in his
preparations for to-morrow but then he has servants does the man think
he is so secure of me that having appointed he need not give himself
any further concern about me till the very moment he knows how i am
beset he knows not what may happen i may be ill or still more closely
watched or confined than before the correspondence might be discovered 
it might be necessary to vary the scheme i might be forced into
measures which might entirely frustrate my purpose i might have new
doubts i might suggest something more convenient for any thing he
knew what can the man mean i wonder yet it shall lie for if he has
it any time before the appointed hour it will save me declaring to him
personally my changed purpose and the trouble of contending with him on
that score if he send for it at all he will see by the date that he
might have had it in time and if he be put to any inconvenience from
shortness of notice let him take it for his pains 


sunday night nine o'clock 

it is determined it seems to send for mrs norton to be here on
tuesday to dinner and she is to stay with me for a whole week 

so she is first to endeavour to persuade me to comply and when the
violence is done she is to comfort me and try to reconcile me to
my fate they expect fits and fetches betty insolently tells me and
expostulations and exclamations without number but every body will
be prepared for them and when it's over it's over and i shall be easy
and pacified when i find i can't help it 


monday morn april 10 seven o'clock 

o my dear there yet lies the letter just as i left it 

does he think he is so sure of me perhaps he imagines that i dare not
alter my purpose i wish i had never known him i begin now to see this
rashness in the light every one else would have seen it in had i been
guilty of it but what can i do if he come to-day at the appointed
time if he receive not the letter i must see him or he will think
something has befallen me and certainly will come to the house as
certainly he will be insulted and what in that case may be the
consequence then i as good as promised that i would take the first
opportunity to see him if i change my mind and to give him my reasons
for it i have no doubt but he will be out of humour upon it but
better if we meet that he should go away dissatisfied with me than
that i should go away dissatisfied with myself 

yet short as the time is he may still perhaps send and get the
letter something may have happened to prevent him which when known
will excuse him 

after i have disappointed him more than once before on a requested
interview only it is impossible he should not have a curiosity at
least to know if something has not happened and whether my mind hold
or not in this more important case and yet as i rashly confirmed my
resolution by a second letter i begin now to doubt it 


nine o'clock 

my cousin dolly hervey slid the enclosed letter into my hand as i
passed by her coming out of the garden 


dearest madam 

i have got intelligence from one who pretends to know every thing 
that you must be married on wednesday morning to mr solmes perhaps 
however she says this only to vex me for it is that saucy creature
betty barnes a license is got as she says and so far she went as to
tell me bidding me say nothing but she knew i would that mr brand is
to marry you for dr lewen i hear refuses unless your consent can
be obtained and they have heard that he does not approve of their
proceedings against you mr brand i am told is to have his fortune
made by uncle harlowe and among them 

you will know better than i what to make of all these matters for
sometimes i think betty tells me things as if i should not tell you 
and yet expects that i will for there is great whispering between miss
harlowe and her and i have observed that when their whispering is over 
betty comes and tells me something by way of secret she and all the
world know how much i love you and so i would have them it is an
honour to me to love a young lady who is and ever was an honour to all
her family let them say what they will 


 it is easy for such of the readers as have been attentive
 to mr lovelace's manner of working to suppose from this
 hint of miss hervey's that he had instructed his double-
 faced agent to put his sweet-heart betty upon alarming miss
 hervey in hopes she would alarm her beloved cousin as we
 see she does in order to keep her steady to her
 appointment with him 


but from a more certain authority than betty's i can assure you but i
must beg of you to burn this letter that you are to be searched
once more for letters and for pen and ink for they know you write 
something they pretend to have come at from one of mr lovelace's
servants which they hope to make something of i know not for certain
what it is he must be a very vile and wicked man who would boast of a
lady's favour to him and reveal secrets but mr lovelace i dare say 
is too much of a gentleman to be guilty of such ingratitude 

then they have a notion from that false betty i believe that you
intend to take something to make yourself sick and so they will search
for phials and powders and such like 

if nothing shall be found that will increase their suspicions you are
to be used more kindly by your papa when you appear before them all 
than he of late has used you 

yet sick or well alas my dear cousin you must be married but your
husband is to go home every night without you till you are reconciled
to him and so illness can be no pretence to save you 

they are sure you will make a good wife so would not i unless i liked
my husband and mr solmes is always telling them how he will purchase
your love by rich presents a syncophant man i wish he and betty
barnes were to come together and he would beat her every day 

after what i told you i need not advise you to secure every thing you
would not have seen 

once more let me beg that you will burn this letter and pray dearest
madam do not take any thing that may prejudice your health for that
will not do i am

your truly loving cousin d h 


 


when i first read my cousin's letter i was half inclined to resume my
former intention especially as my countermanding letter was not taken
away and as my heart ached at the thoughts of the conflict i must
expect to have with him on my refusal for see him for a few moments i
doubt i must lest he should take some rash resolutions especially as
he has reason to expect i will see him but here your words that all
punctilio is at an end the moment i am out of my father's house 
added to the still more cogent considerations of duty and reputation 
determined me once more against the rash step and it will be very hard
 although no seasonable fainting or wished-for fit should stand my
friend if i cannot gain one month or fortnight or week and i have
still more hopes that i shall prevail for some delay from my cousin's
intimation that the good dr lewen refuses to give his assistance to
their projects if they have not my consent and thinks me cruelly used 
since without taking notice that i am apprized of this i can plead
a scruple of conscience and insist upon having that worthy divine's
opinion upon it in which enforced as i shall enforce it my mother
will surely second me my aunt hervey and mrs norton will support
her the suspension must follow and i can but get away afterwards 

but if they will compel me if they will give me no time if nobody
will be moved if it be resolved that the ceremony should be read over
my constrained hand why then alas what then i can but but what o
my dear this solmes shall never have my vows i am resolved and i will
say nothing but no as long as i shall be able to speak and who will
presume to look upon such an act of violence as a marriage it is
impossible surely that a father and mother can see such a dreadful
compulsion offered to their child but if mine should withdraw and
leave the task to my brother and sister they will have no mercy 

i am grieved to be driven to have recourse to the following artifices 

i have given them a clue by the feather of a pen sticking out where
they will find such of my hidden stories as i intend they shall find 

two or three little essays i have left easy to be seen of my own
writing 

about a dozen lines also of a letter begun to you in which i express
my hopes although i say that appearances are against me and that
my friends will relent they know from your mother by my uncle antony 
that some how or other i now and then get a letter to you in this
piece of a letter i declare renewedly my firm resolution to give up the
man so obnoxious to my family on their releasing me from the address of
the other 

near the essays i have left the copy of my letter to lady drayton 
which affording arguments suitable to my case may chance thus
accidentally to be fallen upon to incline them to favour me 


 see letters xiii and xiv 


i have reserves of pens and ink you may believe and one or two in the
ivy summer-house with which i shall amuse myself in order to lighten 
if possible those apprehensions which more and more affect me as
wednesday the day of trial approaches 




letter xlvii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe ivy summer-house eleven o'clock 

he has not yet got my letter and while i was contriving here how to
send my officious gaoleress from me that i might have time for the
intended interview and had hit upon an expedient which i believe would
have done came my aunt and furnished me with a much better she saw my
little table covered preparative to my solitary dinner and hoped 
she told me that this would be the last day that my friends would be
deprived of my company at table 

you may believe my dear that the thoughts of meeting mr lovelace 
for fear of being discovered together with the contents of my cousin
dolly's letter gave me great and visible emotions she took notice of
them why these sighs why these heavings here said she patting my
neck o my dear niece who would have thought so much natural sweetness
could be so very unpersuadable 

i could not answer her and she proceeded i am come i doubt upon a
very unwelcome errand some things have been told us yesterday which
came from the mouth of one of the most desperate and insolent men in the
world convince your father and all of us that you still find means
to write out of the house mr lovelace knows every thing that is done
here and that as soon as done and great mischief is apprehended from
him which you are as much concerned as any body to prevent your mother
has also some apprehensions concerning yourself which yet she hopes are
groundless but however cannot be easy if she would unless while
you remain here in the garden or in this summer-house you give her
the opportunity once more of looking into your closet your cabinet and
drawers it will be the better taken if you give me cheerfully your
keys i hope my dear you won't dispute it your desire of dining in
this place was the more readily complied with for the sake of such an
opportunity 

i thought myself very lucky to be so well prepared by my cousin dolly's
means for this search but yet i artfully made some scruples and not a
few complaints of this treatment after which i not only gave her the
keys of all but even officiously emptied my pockets before her and
invited her to put her fingers in my stays that she might be sure i had
no papers there 

this highly obliged her and she said she would represent my cheerful
compliance as it deserved let my brother and sister say what they
would my mother in particular she was sure would rejoice at the
opportunity given her to obviate as she doubted not would be the case 
some suspicions that were raised against me 

she then hinted that there were methods taken to come at all mr 
lovelace's secrets and even from his careless communicativeness at
some secret of mine it being she said his custom boastingly to prate
to his very servants of his intentions in particular cases she added 
that deep as he was thought to be my brother was as deep as he and
fairly too hard for him at his own weapons as one day it would be
found 

i knew not i said the meaning of these dark hints i thought the
cunning she hinted at on both sides called rather for contempt than
applause i myself might have been put upon artifices which my heart
disdained to practise had i given way to the resentment which i was
bold to say was much more justifiable than the actions that occasioned
it that it was evident to me from what she had said that their
present suspicions of me were partly owing to this supposed superior
cunning of my brother and partly to the consciousness that the usage i
met with might naturally produce a reason for such suspicions that it
was very unhappy for me to be made the butt of my brother's wit that it
would have been more to his praise to have aimed at shewing a kind heart
than a cunning head that nevertheless i wished he knew himself as
well as i imagined i knew him and he would then have less conceit of
his abilities which abilities would in my opinion be less thought of 
if his power to do ill offices were not much greater than they 

i was vexed i could not help making this reflection the dupe the
other too probably makes of him through his own spy deserved it but
i so little approve of this low art in either that were i but tolerably
used the vileness of that man that joseph leman should be inquired
into 

she was sorry she said to find that i thought so disparagingly of my
brother he was a young man both of learning and parts 

learning enough i said to make him vain of it among us women but not
of parts sufficient to make his learning valuable either to himself or
to any body else 

she wished indeed that he had more good nature but she feared that
i had too great an opinion of somebody else to think so well of my
brother as a sister ought since between the two there was a sort of
rivalry as to abilities that made them hate one another 

rivalry madam said i if that be the case or whether it be or not 
i wish they both understood better than either of them seem to do 
what it becomes gentlemen and men of liberal education to be and to
do neither of them then would glory in what they ought to be ashamed
of 

but waving this subject it was not impossible i said that they might
find a little of my writing and a pen or two and a little ink  hated
art or rather hateful the necessity for it   as i was not permitted
to go up to put them out of the way but if they did i must be
contented and i assured her that take what time they pleased i would
not go in to disturb them but would be either in or near the garden 
in this summer-house or in the cedar one or about my poultry-yard or
near the great cascade till i was ordered to return to my prison with
like cunning i said i supposed the unkind search would not be made
till the servants had dined because i doubted not that the pert betty
barnes who knew all the corners of my apartment and closet would be
employed in it 

she hoped she said that nothing could be found that would give a
handle against me for she would assure me the motives to the search 
on my mother's part especially were that she hoped to find reason
rather to acquit than to blame me and that my father might be induced
to see my to-morrow night or wednesday morning with temper with
tenderness i should rather say said she for he is resolved to do so 
if no new offence be given 

ah madam said i 

why that ah madam and shaking your head so significantly 

i wish madam that i may not have more reason to dread my father's
continued displeasure than to hope for his returning tenderness 

you don't know my dear things may take a turn things may not be so
bad as you fear 

dearest madam have you any consolation to give me 

why my dear it is possible that you may be more compliable than you
have been 

why raised you my hopes madam don't let me think my dear aunt hervey
cruel to a niece who truly honours her 

i may tell you more perhaps said she but in confidence absolute
confidence if the inquiry within came out in your favour do you know
of any thin above that can be found to your disadvantage 

some papers they will find i doubt but i must take consequences 
my brother and sister will be at hand with their good-natured
constructions i am made desperate and care not what is found 

i hope i earnestly hope that nothing can be found that will impeach
your discretion and then but i may say too much 

and away she went having added to my perplexity 

but i now can think of nothing but this interview would to heaven it
were over to meet to quarrel but let him take what measures he will 
i will not stay a moment with him if he be not quite calm and resigned 

don't you see how crooked some of my lines are don't you see how some
of the letters stagger more than others that is when this interview is
more in my head than in my subject 

but after all should i ought i to meet him how have i taken it for
granted that i should i wish there were time to take your advice yet
you are so loth to speak quite out but that i owe as you own to the
difficulty of my situation 

i should have mentioned that in the course of this conversation i
besought my aunt to stand my friend and to put in a word for me on
my approaching trial and to endeavour to procure me time for
consideration if i could obtain nothing else 

she told me that after the ceremony was performed  odious confirmation
of a hint in my cousin dolly's letter   i should have what time i
pleased to reconcile myself to my lot before cohabitation 

this put me out of all patience 

she requested of me in her turn she said that i would resolve to meet
them all with cheerful duty and with a spirit of absolute acquiescence 
it was in my power to make them all happy and how joyful would it be
to her she said to see my father my mother my uncles my brother my
sister all embracing me with raptures and folding me in turns to their
fond hearts and congratulating each other on their restored happiness 
her own joy she said would probably make her motionless and speechless
for a time and for her dolly the poor girl who had suffered in the
esteem of some for her grateful attachment to me would have every body
love her again 

will you doubt my dear that my next trial will be the most affecting
that i have yet had 

my aunt set forth all this in so strong a light and i was so
particularly touched on my cousin dolly's account that impatient as i
was just before i was greatly moved yet could only shew by my sighs
and my tears how desirable such an event would be to me could it
be brought about upon conditions with which it was possible for me to
comply 

here comes betty barnes with my dinner 


 


the wench is gone the time of meeting is at hand o that he may not
come but should i or should i not meet him how i question without
possibility of a timely answer 

betty according to my leading hint to my aunt boasted to me that she
was to be employed as she called it after she had eat her own dinner 

she should be sorry she told me to have me found out yet twould be
all for my good i should have it in my power to be forgiven for all at
once before wednesday night the confident creature then to stifle a
laugh put a corner of her apron in her mouth and went to the door 
and on her return to take away as i angrily bid her she begged my
excuse but but and then the saucy creature laughed again she could
not help it to think how i had drawn myself in by my summer-house
dinnering since it had given so fine an opportunity by way of
surprise to look into all my private hoards she thought something was
in the wind when my brother came into my dining here so readily her
young master was too hard for every body squire lovelace himself was
nothing at all at a quick thought to her young master 

my aunt mentioned mr lovelace's boasting behaviour to his servants 
perhaps he may be so mean but as to my brother he always took a pride
in making himself appear to be a man of parts and learning to our
own servants pride and meanness i have often thought are as nearly
allied and as close borderers upon each other as the poet tells us wit
and madness are 

but why do i trouble you and myself at such a crisis with these
impertinences yet i would forget if i could the nearest evil the
interview because my apprehensions increasing as the hour is at hand 
i should were my intentions to be engrossed by them be unfit to see
him if he does come and then he will have too much advantage over me 
as he will have seeming reason to reproach me with change of resolution 

the upbraider you know my dear is in some sense a superior while the
upbraided if with reason upbraided must make a figure as spiritless as
conscious 

i know that this wretch will if he can be his own judge and mine too 
but the latter he shall not be 

i dare say we shall be all to pieces but i don't care for that it
would be hard if i who have held it out so sturdily to my father and
uncles should not but he is at the garden-door 


 


i was mistaken how many noises unlike be made like to what one
fears why flutters the fool so 


 


i will hasten to deposit this then i will for the last time go to the
usual place in hopes to find that he has got my letter if he has i
will not meet him if he has not i will take it back and shew him what
i have written that will break the ice as i may say and save me much
circumlocution and reasoning and a steady adherence to that my written
mind is all that will be necessary the interview must be as short as
possible for should it be discovered it would furnish a new and strong
pretence for the intended evil of wednesday next 

perhaps i shall not be able to write again one while perhaps not till
i am the miserable property of that solmes but that shall never never
be while i have my senses 

if your servant find nothing from me by wednesday morning you may then
conclude that i can neither write to you nor receive your favours 

in that case pity and pray for me my beloved friend and continue to
me that place in your affection which is the pride of my life and the
only comfort left to

your cl harlowe 




letter xlviii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe st alban's tuesday morn past one 


o my dearest friend 

after what i had resolved upon as by my former what shall i write 
what can i with what consciousness even by letter do i approach
you you will soon hear if already you have not heard from the mouth
of common fame that your clarissa harlowe is gone off with a man 

i am busying myself to give you the particulars at large the whole
twenty-four hours of each day to begin at the moment i can fix shall
be employed in it till it is finished every one of the hours i mean 
that will be spared me by this interrupting man to whom i have made
myself so foolishly accountable for too many of them rest is departed
from me i have no call for that and that has no balm for the wounds
of my mind so you'll have all those hours without interruption till the
account is ended 

but will you receive shall you be permitted to receive my letters 
after what i have done 

o my dearest friend but i must make the best of it 

i hope that will not be very bad yet am i convinced that i did a rash
and inexcusable thing in meeting him and all his tenderness all his
vows cannot pacify my inward reproaches on that account 

the bearer comes to you my dear for the little parcel of linen which i
sent you with far better and more agreeable hopes 

send not my letters send the linen only except you will favour me with
one line to tell me you love me still and that you will suspend your
censures till you have the whole before you i am the readier to send
thus early because if you have deposited any thing for me you may
cause it to be taken back or withhold any thing you had but intended to
send 

adieu my dearest friend i beseech you to love me still but
alas what will your mother say what will mine what my other
relations and what my dear mrs norton and how will my brother and
sister triumph 

i cannot at present tell you how or where you can direct to me for
very early shall i leave this place harassed and fatigued to death 
but when i can do nothing else constant use has made me able to write 
long very long has been all my amusement and pleasure yet could not
that have been such to me had i not had you my best beloved friend to
write to once more adieu pity and pray for

your cl harlowe 


letters of volume iii


letter i miss howe to clarissa is astonished confounded aghast 
repeats her advice to marry lovelace 

letter ii clarissa to miss howe gives a particular account of her
meeting lovelace of her vehement contention with him and at last 
of her being terrified out of her predetermined resolution and tricked
away her grief and compunction of heart upon it lays all to the fault
of corresponding with him at first against paternal prohibition is
incensed against him for his artful dealings with her and for his
selfish love 

letter iii mr lovelace to joseph leman a letter which lays open the
whole of his contrivance to get off clarissa 

letter iv joseph leman in answer 

letter v lovelace to belford in ecstasy on the success of his
contrivances well as he loves clarissa he would show her no mercy if
he thought she preferred any man living to him will religiously observe
the injunctions she laid upon him previous to their meeting 

letter vi clarissa to miss howe a recriminating conversation between
her and lovelace he reminds her of her injunctions and instead of
beseeching her to dispense with them promises a sacred regard to them 
it is not therefore in her power she tells miss howe to take her
advice as to speedy marriage  a note on the place justifying her
conduct   is attended by mrs greme lord m s housekeeper at the lawn 
who waits on her to her sister sorlings with whom she consents to
lodge his looks offend her has written to her sister for her clothes 

letter vii lovelace to belford gives briefly the particulars of
his success describes her person and dress on her first meeting him 
extravagant exultation makes belford question him on the honour of his
designs by her and answers doubtfully 

letter viii miss howe to clarissa her sentiments on her narrative 
her mother at the instigation of antony harlowe forbids their
correspondence mr hickman's zeal to serve them in it what her family
now pretend if she had not left them how they took her supposed
projected flight offers her money and clothes would have her seem to
place some little confidence in lovelace her brother and sister will
not permit her father and uncles to cool 

letter ix x clarissa to miss howe advises her to obey her mother who
prohibits their correspondence declines to accept her offers of money 
and why mr lovelace not a polite man she will be as ready to place a
confidence in him as he will be to deserve it yet tricked away by him
as she was cannot immediately treat him with great complaisance blames
her for her liveliness to her mother encloses the copy of her letter to
her sister 

letter xi lovelace to belford prides himself in his arts in the
conversations between them is alarmed at the superiority of her
talents considers opposition and resistance as a challenge to do his
worst his artful proceedings with joseph leman 

letter xii from the same men need only be known to be rakes he says 
to recommend themselves to the favour of the sex wishes miss howe were
not so well acquainted with clarissa and why 

letter xiii from the same intends to set old antony at mrs howe to
prevent the correspondence between the two young ladies girl not gold 
his predominant passion rallies belford on his person and appearance 
takes humourous notice of the two daughters of the widow sorlings 

letter xiv from the same farther triumphs over the harlowes 
similitude of the spider and fly is for having separate churches as
well as separate boarding-schools for the sexes the women ought to love
him he says and why prides himself that they do 

letter xv clarissa to miss howe particulars of an angry conference
with lovelace seeing her sincerely displeased he begs the ceremony may
immediately pass he construes her bashful silence into anger and vows
a sacred regard to her injunctions 

letter xvi xvii xviii lovelace to belford the pleasure of a
difficult chace triumphs in the distress and perplexity he gave her by
his artful and parading offer of marriage his reasons for and against
doing her justice resolves to try her to the utmost the honour of the
whole sex concerned in the issue of her trial matrimony he sees is in
his power now she is 

letter xix miss howe to clarissa will not obey her mother in her
prohibition of their correspondence and why is charmed with her
spirit 

letter xx clarissa to miss howe knows not what she can do with
lovelace he may thank himself for the trouble he has had on her
account did she ever she asks make him any promises did she ever
receive him as a lover 

letter xxi xxii from the same she calls upon lovelace to give her a
faithful account of the noise and voices she heard at the garden-door 
which frightened her away with him his confession and daring hints in
relation to solmes and her brother and betty barnes she is terrified 

letter xxiii lovelace to belford rejoices in the stupidity of the
harlowes exults in his capacity for mischief the condescensions
to which he intends to bring the lady libertine observations to the
disadvantage of women which may serve as cautions to the sex 

letter xxiv clarissa to miss howe a conversation with mr lovelace
wholly agreeable his promises of reformation she remembers to his
advantage his generosity to his rosebud and his tenants writes to her
aunt hervey 

letter xxv xxvi lovelace to belford his acknowledged vanity 
accounts for his plausible behaviour and specious promises and
proposals apprehensive of the correspondence between miss howe and
clarissa loves to plague him with out-of-the-way words and phrases 

letter xxvii miss howe to clarissa how to judge of lovelace's
suspicious proposals and promises hickman devoted to their service yet
she treats him with ridicule 

letter xxviii clarissa to miss howe lovelace complains she hears to
mrs greme of her adhering to her injunctions what means he by it she
asks yet forego such opportunities as he had she is punished for her
vanity in hoping to be an example blames miss howe for her behaviour to
hickman 

letter xxix from the same warm dialogues with lovelace she is
displeased with him for his affectedly-bashful hints of matrimony 
mutual recriminations he looks upon her as his she says by a strange
sort of obligation for having run away with her against her will yet
but touches on the edges of matrimony neither she is sick of herself 

letter xxx from the same mr lovelace a perfect proteus he now
applauds her for that treatment of him which before he had resented and
communicates to her two letters one from lady betty lawrance the other
from miss montague she wonders he did not produce those letters before 
as he must know they would be highly acceptable to her 

letter xxxi xxxii xxxiii xxxiv from the same the contents of the
letters from lady betty and miss montague put clarissa in good humour
with mr lovelace he hints at marriage but pretends to be afraid of
pursuing the hint she is earnest with him to leave her and why 
he applauds her reasonings her serious questions and his ludicrous
answer he makes different proposals he offers to bring mrs norton
to her she is ready to blame herself for her doubts of him but
gives reasons for her caution he writes by her consent to his friend
doleman to procure lodgings for her in town 

letter xxxv lovelace to belford glories in his contrivances gives
an advantageous description of clarissa's behaviour exults on her
mentioning london none but impudent girls he says should run away
with a man his farther views plots and designs 

letter xxxvi miss howe to clarissa humourously touches on her
reproofs in relation to hickman observations on smooth love lord
m s family greatly admire her approves of her spirited treatment of
lovelace and of her going to london hints at the narrowness of her own
mother advises her to keep fair with lovelace 

letter xxxvii xxxviii clarissa to miss howe wonders not that her
brother has weight to make her father irreconcilable copy of mr 
doleman's answer about london lodgings her caution in her choice of
them lovelace has given her five guineas for hannah other instances of
his considerateness not displeased with her present prospects 

letter xxxix lovelace to belford explains what is meant by doleman's
answer about the lodgings makes belford object to his scheme that
he may answer the objections exults swells despises every body 
importance of the minutiae more of his arts views and contrivances 

letter xl miss howe to clarissa acquaints her with a scheme formed
by her brother and captain singleton to carry her off hickman's silent
charities she despises all his sex as well as him ill terms on which
her own father and mother lived extols clarissa for her domestic good
qualities particulars of a great contest with her mother on their
correspondence has been slapt by her observations on managing wives 

letter xli xlii xliii clarissa to miss howe a strong remonstrance
on her behaviour to her mother in which she lays down the duty of
children accuses her of want of generosity to hickman farther excuses
herself on declining to accept of her money offers proposes a condition
on which mrs howe may see all they write 

letter xliv miss howe to clarissa her mother rejects the proposed
condition miss howe takes thankfully her reprehensions but will
continue the correspondence some excuses for herself humourous story
of game-chickens 

letter xlv clarissa to miss howe lovelace communicates her brother's
and singleton's project but treats it with seeming contempt she asks
his advice what to do upon it this brings on an offer of marriage from
him how it went off 

letter xlvi lovelace to belford he confesses his artful intentions in
the offer of marriage yet had like he says to have been caught in his
own snares 

letter xlvii joseph leman to mr lovelace with intelligence of a
design formed against him by the harlowes joseph's vile hypocrisy and
selfishness 

letter xlviii lovelace in answer story of miss betterton boast of
his treatment of his mistresses the artful use he makes of joseph's
intelligence 

letter xlix clarissa to her aunt hervey complains of her silence 
hints at her not having designed to go away with lovelace she will open
her whole heart to her if she encourage her to do so by the hopes of a
reconciliation 

letter l miss howe to clarissa observations on lovelace's meanness 
pride and revenge politeness not to be expected from him she raves
at him for the artful manner in which he urges clarissa to marry him 
advises her how to act in her present situation 

letter li belford to lovelace becomes a warm advocate for the lady 
gives many instructive reasons to enforce his arguments in her favour 

letter lii mrs hervey to clarissa a severe and cruel letter in
answer to her's letter xlix it was not designed she says absolutely
to force her to marry to her dislike 

letter liii clarissa to miss howe her deep regret on this
intelligence for having met lovelace the finer sensibilities make
not happy her fate too visibly in her power he is unpolite cruel 
insolent unwise a trifler in his own happiness her reasons why she
less likes him than ever her soul his soul's superior her fortitude 
her prayer 

letter liv lv from the same now indeed is her heart broken she
says a solemn curse laid upon her by her father her sister's barbarous
letters on the occasion 

letter lvi miss howe to clarissa a letter full of generous
consolation and advice her friendly vow sends her fifty guineas in the
leaves of a norris's miscellanies 

letter lvii clarissa to miss howe a faithful friend the medicine of
life she is just setting out for london lovelace has offered marriage
to her in so unreserved a manner that she wishes she had never written
with diffidence of him is sorry it was not in her power to comply with
his earnest solicitations returns her norris and why 

letter lviii lix miss howe to clarissa sorry she has returned
her norris wishes she had accepted of lovelace's unreserved offer of
marriage believes herself to have a sneaking kindness for hickman and
why she blames mrs harlowe and why 

in answer to letter viii clarissa states the difference in the
characters of mr lovelace and mr hickman and tells her that her
motives for suspending marriage were not merely ceremonious ones 
regrets mrs howe's forbidding the correspondence between them her
dutiful apology for her own mother lesson to children 

letter lx lovelace to belford thinks he shall be inevitably manacled
at last the lady's extreme illness her filial piety gives her dreadful
faith in a father's curses she lets not miss howe know how very ill she
was his vows of marriage bring her back to life absolutely in earnest
in those vows  the only time he was so   he can now talk of love and
marriage without check descants upon belford's letter no li 

letter lxi from the same is setting out for london a struggle with
his heart owns it to be a villain of a heart a fit of strong but
transitory remorse if he do marry he doubts he shall have a vapourish
wife thinks it would be better for both not to marry his libertine
reasons lessons to the sex 

letter lxii from the same they arrive at mrs sinclair's sally
martin and polly horton set upon him he wavers in his good purposes 
dorcas wykes proposed and reluctantly accepted for a servant till
hannah can come dorcas's character he has two great points to carry 
what they are 





the history of clarissa harlowe




letter i

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe tuesday nine o'clock 


i write because you enjoin me to do so love you still how can i
help it if i would you may believe how i stand aghast your letter
communicating the first news good god of heaven and earth but what
shall i say i am all impatient for particulars 

lord have mercy upon me but can it be 

my mother will indeed be astonished how can i tell it her it was
but last night upon some jealousies put into her head by your foolish
uncle that i assured her and this upon the strength of your own
assurances that neither man nor devil would be able to induce you to
take a step that was in the least derogatory to the most punctilious
honour 

but once more can it be what woman at this rate but god preserve
you 

let nothing escape you in your letters direct them for me however to
mrs knolly's till further notice 


 


observe my dear that i don't blame you by all this your relations
only are in fault yet how you came to change your mind is the
surprising thing 

how to break it to my mother i know not yet if she hear it first
from any other and find i knew it before she will believe it to be my
connivance yet as i hope to live i know not how to break it to her 

but this is teasing you i am sure without intention 

let me now repeat my former advice if you are not married by this time 
be sure delay not the ceremony since things are as they are i wish it
were thought that you were privately married before you went away if
these men plead authority to our pain when we are theirs why should we
not in such a case as this make some good out of the hated word for
our reputation when we are induced to violate a more natural one 

your brother and sister  that vexes me almost as much as any thing  
have now their ends now i suppose will go forward alterations of
wills and such-like spiteful doings 


 


miss lloyd and miss biddulph this moment send up their names they
are out of breath kitty says to speak to me easy to guess their
errand i must see my mother before i see them i have no way but to
shew her your letter to clear myself i shall not be able to say a
word till she has run herself out of her first breath forgive me my
dear surprise makes me write thus if your messenger did not wait and
were not those young ladies below i could write it over again for fear
of afflicting you 

i send what you write for if there be any thing else you want that is
in my power command without reserve

your ever affectionate anna howe 




letter ii 

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe tuesday night 


i think myself obliged to thank you my dear miss howe for your
condescension in taking notice of a creature who has occasioned you so
much scandal 

i am grieved on this account as much i verily think as for the evil
itself 

tell me but yet i am afraid to know what your mother said 

i long and yet i dread to be told what the young ladies my
companions now never more perhaps to be so say of me 

they cannot however say worse of me than i will of myself self
accusation shall flow in every line of my narrative where i think i am
justly censurable if any thing can arise from the account i am going to
give you for extenuation of my fault for that is all a person can
hope for who cannot excuse herself i know i may expect it from your
friendship though not from the charity of any other since by this time
i doubt not every mouth is opened against me and all that know clarissa
harlowe condemn the fugitive daughter 

after i had deposited my letter to you written down to the last hour 
as i may say i returned to the ivy summer-house first taking back my
letter from the loose bricks and there i endeavoured as coolly as my
situation would permit to recollect and lay together several incidents
that had passed between my aunt and me and comparing them with some of
the contents of my cousin dolly's letter i began to hope that i needed
not to be so very apprehensive as i have been of next wednesday and
thus i argued with myself 

wednesday cannot possibly be the day they intend although to
intimidate me they may wish me to think it is for the settlements are
unsigned nor have they been offered me to sign i can choose whether i
will or will not put my hand to them hard as it will be to refuse if my
father and mother propose if i made compulsion necessary to go to my
uncle's themselves in order to be out of the way of my appeals whereas
they intend to be present on wednesday and however affecting to me the
thought of meeting them and all my friends in full assembly is perhaps
it is the very thing i ought to wish for since my brother and sister
had such an opinion of my interest in them that they got me excluded
from their presence as a measure which they thought previously
necessary to carry on their designs 

nor have i reason to doubt but that as i had before argued with
myself i shall be able to bring over some of my relations to my party 
and being brought face to face with my brother that i shall expose his
malevolence and of consequence weaken his power 

then supposing the very worst challenging the minister as i shall
challenge him he will not presume to proceed nor surely will mr 
solmes dare to accept my refusing and struggling hand and finally 
if nothing else will do nor procure me delay i can plead scruples of
conscience and even pretend prior obligation for my dear i have give
mr lovelace room to hope as you will see in one of my letters in your
hands that i will be no other man's while he is single and gives me
not wilful and premeditated cause of offence against him and this in
order to rein-in his resentment on the declared animosity of my brother
and uncles to him and as i shall appeal or refer my scruples on this
head to the good dr lewen it is impossible but that my mother and
aunt if nobody else must be affected with this plea 

revolving cursorily these things i congratulated myself that i had
resolved against going away with mr lovelace 

i told you my dear that i would not spare myself and i enumerate
these particulars as so many arguments to condemn the actions i have
been so unhappily betrayed into an argument that concludes against me
with the greater force as i must acknowledge that i was apprehensive 
that what my cousin dolly mentions as from betty and from my sister who
told her that she should tell me in order to make me desperate and
perhaps to push me upon some such step as i have been driven to take as
the most effectual means to ruin me with my father and uncles 

god forgive me if i judge too harshly of their views but if i do not 
it follows that they laid a wicked snare for me and that i have been
caught in it and now they triumph if they can triumph in the ruin of
a sister who never wished or intended to hurt them 

as the above kind of reasoning had lessened my apprehensions as to the
wednesday it added to those i had of meeting mr lovelace now as it
seemed not only the nearest but the heaviest evil principally indeed
because nearest for little did i dream foolish creature that i
was and every way beset of the event proving what it has proved i
expected a contention with him tis true as he had not my letter but
i thought it would be very strange as i mentioned in one of my former 
if i who had so steadily held out against characters so venerable 
against authorities so sacred as i may say when i thought them
unreasonably exerted should not find myself more equal to such a trial
as this especially as i had so much reason to be displeased with him
for not having taken away my letter 

on what a point of time may one's worldly happiness depend had i but
two hours more to consider of the matter and to attend to and improve
upon these new lights as i may call them but even then perhaps i
might have given him a meeting fool that i was what had i to do to
give him hope that i would personally acquaint him with the reason for
my change of mind if i did change it 

o my dear an obliging temper is a very dangerous temper by
endeavouring to gratify others it is evermore disobliging itself 

when the bell rang to call the servants to dinner betty came to me
and asked if i had any commands before she went to hers repeating
her hint that she should be employed adding that she believed it was
expected that i should not come up till she came down or till i saw my
aunt or miss hervey 

i asked her some questions about the cascade which had been out of
order and lately mended and expressed a curiosity to see how it
played in order to induce her  how cunning to cheat myself as it
proved   to go thither if she found me not where she left me it being
a part of the garden most distant from the ivy summer-house 

she could hardly have got into the house when i heard the first
signal o how my heart fluttered but no time was to be lost i
stept to the garden-door and seeing a clear coast unbolted the
already-unlocked door and there was he all impatience waiting for me 

a panic next to fainting seized me when i saw him my heart seemed
convulsed and i trembled so that i should hardly have kept my feet 
had he not supported me 

fear nothing dearest creature said he let us hasten away the chariot
is at hand and by this sweet condescension you have obliged me beyond
expression or return 

recovering my spirits a little as he kept drawing me after him o mr 
lovelace said i i cannot go with you indeed i cannot i wrote you
word so let go my hand and you shall see my letter it is lain there
from yesterday morning till within this half-hour i bid you watch to
the last for a letter from me lest i should be obliged to revoke the
appointment and had you followed the direction you would have found
it 

i have been watched my dearest life said he half out of breath i
have been watched in every step i took and my trusty servant has been
watched too ever since saturday and dared not to come near your
wall and here we shall be discovered in a moment speed away my
charmer this is the moment of your deliverance if you neglect this
opportunity you can never have such another 

what is it you mean sir let go my hand for i tell you  struggling
vehemently  that i will sooner die than go with you 

good god said he with a look of wildness and surprise what is it i
hear but  still drawing me after him as he retreated farther from the
door  it is no time to argue by all that's good you must go surely you
cannot doubt my honour nor give me cause to question your own 

as you value me mr lovelace urge me no farther i come fixed and
resolved let me give you the letter i have written my further reasons
shall follow and they will convince you that i ought not to go 

nothing madam can convince me by all that's sacred i will not leave
you to leave you now would be to lose you for ever 

am i to be thus compelled interrupted i with equal indignation and
vehemence let go my hands i am resolved not to go with you and i
will convince you that i ought not 

all my friends expect you madam all your own are determined against
you wednesday next is the day the important perhaps the fatal day 
would you stay to be solmes's wife can this be your determination at
last 

no never never will i be that man's but i will not go with you  draw
me not thus how dare you sir i would not have seen you but to tell
you so  i had not met you but for fear you would have been guilty of
some rashness and once more i will not go what mean you striving
with all my force to get from him 

what can have possessed my angel said he  quitting my hands and with a
gentler voice  that after so much ill-usage from your relations vows so
solemn on my part an affection so ardent you stab me with a refusal to
stand by your own appointment 

we have no time to talk mr lovelace i will give you my reasons at a
better opportunity i cannot go with you now and once more urge me no
farther surely i am not to be compelled by every body 

i see how it is said he with a dejected but passionate air what a
severe fate is mine at length your spirit is subdued your brother
and sister have prevailed and i must give up all my hopes to a wretch
so truly despicable 

once more i tell you interrupted i i never will be his all may end on
wednesday differently from what you expect 

and it may not and then good heavens 

it is to be their last effort as i have reason to believe 

and i have reason to believe so too since if you stay you will
inevitably be solmes's wife 

not so interrupted i i have obliged them in one point they will be
in good-humour with me i shall gain time at least i am sure i shall i
have several ways to gain time 

and what madam will gaining time do it is plain you have not a
hope beyond that it is plain you have not by putting all upon that
precarious issue o my dearest dearest life let me beseech you not
to run a risque of this consequence i can convince you that it will be
more than a risque if you go back that you will on wednesday next be
solmes's wife prevent therefore now that it is in your power to
prevent the fatal mischief that will follow such a dreadful certainty 

while i have any room for hope it concerns your honour mr lovelace 
as well as mine if you have the value for me you pretend and wish me
to believe you that my conduct in this great point should justify my
prudence 

your prudence madam when has that been questionable yet what stead
has either your prudence or your duty stood you in with people so
strangely determined 

and then he pathetically enumerated the different instances of the harsh
treatment i had met with imputing all to the malice and caprice of a
brother who set every body against him and insisting that i had no
other way to bring about a reconciliation with my father and uncles 
than by putting myself out of the power of my brother's inveterate
malice 

your brother's whole reliance proceeded he has been upon your easiness
to bear his insults your whole family will seek to you when you have
freed yourself from this disgraceful oppression when they know you are
with those who can and will right you they will give up to you your own
estate why then putting his arms around me and again drawing me
with a gentle force after him do you hesitate a moment now is the
time fly with me then i beseech you my dearest creature trust
your persecuted adorer have we not suffered in the same cause if any
imputations are cast upon you give me the honour as i shall be found
to deserve it to call you mine and when you are so shall i not be
able to protect both your person and character 

urge me no more mr lovelace i conjure you you yourself have given
me a hint which i will speak plainer to than prudence perhaps on any
other occasion would allow i am convinced that wednesday next if i
had time i would give you my reasons is not intended to be the day we
had both so much dreaded and if after that day shall be over i find my
friends determined in mr solmes's favour i will then contrive some
way to meet you with miss howe who is not your enemy and when the
solemnity has passed i shall think that step a duty which till then
will be criminal to take since now my father's authority is unimpeached
by any greater 

dearest madam 

nay mr lovelace if you now dispute if after this more favourable
declaration than i had the thought of making you are not satisfied i
shall know what to think both of your gratitude and generosity 

the case madam admits not of this alternative i am all gratitude upon
it i cannot express how much i should be delighted with the charming
hope you have given me were you not next wednesday if you stay to
be another man's think dearest creature what an heightening of my
anguish the distant hope you bid me look up to is taken in this light 

depend depend upon it i will die sooner than be mr solmes's if you
would have me rely upon your honour why should you doubt of mine 

i doubt not your honour madam your power is all i doubt you never 
never can have such another opportunity dearest creature permit
me and he was again drawing me after him 

whither sir do you draw me leave me this moment do you seek to keep
me till my return shall grow dangerous or impracticable this moment let
me go if you would have me think tolerably of you 

my happiness madam both here and hereafter and the safety of all your
implacable family depend upon this moment 

to providence mr lovelace and to the law will i leave the safety
of my friends you shall not threaten me into a rashness that my heart
condemns shall i to promote your happiness as you call it depend
upon future peace of mind 

you trifle with me my dear life just as our better prospects begin to
open the way is clear just now it is clear but you may be prevented
in a moment what is it you doubt may i perish eternally if your
will shall not be a law to me in every thing all my relations expect
you next wednesday dearest creature think of next wednesday and
to what is it i urge you but to take a step that sooner than any other
will reconcile you to all whom you have most reason to value in your
family 

let my judge for myself sir do not you who blame my friends for
endeavouring to compel me yourself seek to compel i won't bear it 
your earnestness gives me greater apprehensions and greater reluctance 
let me go back then let me before it is too late go back that it
may not be worse for both what mean you by this forcible treatment is
it thus that i am to judge of the entire submission to my will which you
have so often vowed unhand me this moment or i will cry out for help 

i will obey you my dearest creature and quitted my hand with a look
full of tender despondency that knowing the violence of his temper 
half-concerned me for him yet i was hastening from him when with a
solemn air looking upon his sword but catching as it were his hand
from it he folded both his arms as if a sudden thought had recovered
him from an intended rashness 

stay one moment but one moment stay o best beloved of my soul your
retreat is secure if you will go the key lies at the door but 
o madam next wednesday and you are mr solmes's fly me not so
eagerly hear me but a few words 

when near the garden-door i stopped and was the more satisfied as
i saw the key there by which i could let myself in again at pleasure 
but being uneasy lest i should be missed i told him i could stay
no longer i had already staid too long i would write to him all my
reasons and depend upon it mr lovelace said i  just upon the point
of stooping for the key in order to return  i will die rather than
have that man you know what i have promised if i find myself in
danger 

one word madam however one word more  approaching me his arms still
folded as if i thought he would not be tempted to mischief  remember
only that i come at your appointment to redeem you at the hazard of
my life from your gaolers and persecutors with a resolution god is
my witness or may he for ever blast me  that was his shocking
imprecation  to be a father uncle brother and as i humbly hoped in
your own good time a husband to you all in one but since i find you
are so ready to cry out for help against me which must bring down upon
me the vengeance of all your family i am contented to run all risques 
i will not ask you to retreat with me i will attend you into the
garden and into the house if i am not intercepted 

nay be not surprised madam the help you would have called for i will
attend you to for i will face them all but not as a revenger if they
provoke me not too much you shall see what i can further bear for your
sake and let us both see if expostulation and the behaviour of a
gentleman to them will not procure me the treatment due to a gentleman
from them 

had he offered to draw his sword upon himself i was prepared to have
despised him for supposing me such a poor novice as to be intimidated
by an artifice so common but this resolution uttered with so serious
an air of accompanying me in to my friends made me gasp with terror 

what mean you mr lovelace said i i beseech you leave me leave me 
sir i beseech you 

excuse me madam i beg you to excuse me i have long enough skulked
like a thief about these lonely walls long too long have i borne
the insults of your brother and other of your relations absence but
heightens malice i am desperate i have but this one chance for it for
is not the day after to-morrow wednesday i have encouraged virulence
by my tameness yet tame i will still be you shall see madam what i
will bear for your sake my sword shall be put sheathed into your hands
 and he offered it to me in the scabbard  my heart if you please 
clapping one hand upon his breast shall afford a sheath for your
brother's sword life is nothing if i lose you be pleased madam to
shew me the way into the garden  moving toward the door  i will attend
you though to my fate but too happy be it what it will if i receive
it in your presence lead on dear creature  putting his sword into his
belt  you shall see what i can bear for you and he stooped and took
up the key and offered it to the lock but dropped it again without
opening the door upon my earnest expostulations 

what can you mean mr lovelace said i would you thus expose
yourself would you thus expose me is this your generosity is every
body to take advantage thus of the weakness of my temper 

and i wept i could not help it 

he threw himself upon his knees at my feet who can bear said he  with
an ardour that could not be feigned his own eyes glistening   who
can bear to behold such sweet emotion o charmer of my heart  and 
respectfully still kneeling he took my hand with both his pressing it
to his lips   command me with you command me from you in every way
i am implicit to obedience but i appeal to all you know of your
relations' cruelty to you their determined malice against me and as
determined favour to the man you tell me you hate and o madam if you
did not hate him i should hardly think there would be a merit in your
approbation place it where you would i appeal to every thing you
know to all you have suffered whether you have not reason to be
apprehensive of that wednesday which is my terror whether you can
possibly have another opportunity the chariot ready my friends with
impatience expecting the result of your own appointment a man whose
will shall be entirely your will imploring you thus on his knees 
imploring you to be your own mistress that is all nor will i ask
for your favour but as upon full proof i shall appear to deserve it 
fortune alliance unobjectionable o my beloved creature pressing my
hand once more to his lips let not such an opportunity slip you never 
never will have such another 

i bid him rise he arose and i told him that were i not thus
unaccountably hurried by his impatience i doubted not to convince
him that both he and i had looked upon next wednesday with greater
apprehension than was necessary i was proceeding to give him my
reasons but he broke in upon me 

had i madam but the shadow of a probability to hope what you hope i
would be all obedience and resignation but the license is actually
got the parson is provided the pedant brand is the man o my dearest
creature do these preparations mean only a trial 

you know not sir were the worst to be intended and weak as you think
me what a spirit i have you know not what i can do and how i can
resist when i think myself meanly or unreasonably dealt with nor do you
know what i have already suffered what i have already borne knowing to
whose unbrotherly instigations all is to be ascribed 

i may expect all things madam interrupted he from the nobleness of
your mind but your spirits may fail you what may not be apprehended
from the invincible temper of a father so positive to a daughter so
dutiful fainting will not save you they will not perhaps be sorry
for such an effect of their barbarity what will signify expostulations
against a ceremony performed must not all the dreadful all follow 
that is torture to my heart but to think of nobody to appeal to of
what avail will your resistance be against the consequences of a rite
witnessed to by the imposers of it and those your nearest relations 

i was sure i said of procuring a delay at least many ways i had to
procure a delay nothing could be so fatal to us both as for me now to
be found with him my apprehensions on this score i told him grew too
strong for my heart i should think very hardly of him if he sought to
detain me longer but his acquiescence should engage my gratitude 

and then stooping to take up the key to let myself into the garden he
started and looked as if he had heard somebody near the door on the
inside clapping his hand on his sword 

this frighted me so that i thought i should have sunk down at his feet 
but he instantly re-assured me he thought he said he had heard a
rustling against the door but had it been so the noise would have been
stronger it was only the effect of his apprehension for me 

and then taking up the key he presented it to me if you will go 
madam yet i cannot cannot leave you i must enter the garden with
you forgive me but i must enter the garden with you 

and will you will you thus ungenerously mr lovelace take advantage
of my fears of my wishes to prevent mischief i vain fool to be
concerned for every one nobody for me 

dearest creature interrupted he holding my hand as i tremblingly
offered to put the key to the lock let me if you will go open the
door but once more consider could you possibly obtain that delay
which seems to be your only dependence whether you may not be closer
confined i know they have already had that in consideration will you
not in this case be prevented from corresponding either with miss
howe or with me who then shall assist you in your escape if escape
you would from your chamber-window only permitted to view the garden
you must not enter into how will you wish for the opportunity you
now have if your hatred to solmes continue but alas that cannot
continue if you go back it must be from the impulses of a yielding
 which you'll call a dutiful heart tired and teased out of your own
will 

i have no patience sir to be thus constrained must i never be at
liberty to follow my own judgment be the consequence what it may i
will not be thus constrained 

and then freeing my hand i again offered the key to the door 

down the ready kneeler dropt between me and that and can you can you 
madam once more on my knees let me ask you look with an indifferent
eye upon the evils that may follow provoked as i have been and
triumphed over as i shall be if your brother succeeds my own heart
shudders at times at the thoughts of what must happen and can yours
be unconcerned let me beseech you dearest creature to consider all
these things and lose not this only opportunity my intelligence 

never mr lovelace interrupted i give so much credit to the words of
a traitor your base intelligencer is but a servant he may pretend
to know more than he has grounds for in order to earn the wages of
corruption you know not what contrivances i can find out 

i was once more offering the key to the lock when starting from his
knees with a voice of affrightment loudly whispering and as if out
of breath they are at the door my beloved creature and taking the
key from me he fluttered with it as if he would double lock it and
instantly a voice from within cried out bursting against the door as
if to break it open the person repeating his violent pushes are you
there come up this moment this moment here they are here they are
both together your pistol this moment your gun then another push 
and another he at the same moment drew his sword and clapping it
naked under his arm took both my trembling hands in his and drawing me
swiftly after him fly fly my charmer this moment is all you have for
it said he your brother your uncles or this solmes they will
instantly burst the door fly my dearest life if you would not be
more cruelly used than ever if you would not see two or three murders
committed at your feet fly fly i beseech you 

o lord help help cried the fool all in amaze and confusion 
frighted beyond the power of controuling 

now behind me now before me now on this side now on that turned i my
affrighted face in the same moment expecting a furious brother here 
armed servants there an enraged sister screaming and a father armed
with terror in his countenance more dreadful than even the drawn sword
which i saw or those i apprehended i ran as fast as he yet knew not
that i ran my fears adding wings to my feet at the same time that they
took all power of thinking from me my fears which probably would not
have suffered me to know what course to take had i not had him to urge
and draw me after him especially as i beheld a man who must have come
out of the door keeping us in his eye running now towards us then
back to the garden beckoning and calling to others whom i supposed he
saw although the turning of the wall hindered me from seeing them and
whom i imagined to be my brother my father and their servants 

thus terrified i was got out of sight of the door in a very few
minutes and then although quite breathless between running and
apprehension he put my arm under his his drawn sword in the other
hand and hurried me on still faster my voice however contradicting
my action crying no no no all the while straining my neck to look
back as long as the walls of the garden and park were within sight 
and till he brought me to the chariot where attending were two armed
servants of his own and two of lord m s on horseback 

here i must suspend my relation for a while for now i am come to this
sad period of it my indiscretion stares me in the face and my shame
and my grief give me a compunction that is more poignant methinks than
if i had a dagger in my heart to have it to reflect that i should
so inconsiderately give in to an interview which had i known either
myself or him or in the least considered the circumstances of the case 
i might have supposed would put me into the power of his resolution and
out of that of my own reason 

for might i not have believed that he who thought he had cause to
apprehend that he was on the point of losing a person who had cost
him so much pains and trouble would not hinder her if possible from
returning that he who knew i had promised to give him up for ever if
insisted as a condition of reconciliation would not endeavour to put it
out of my power to do so in short that he who had artfully forborne
to send for my letter for he could not be watched my dear lest he
should find in it a countermand to my appointment as i myself could
apprehend although i profited by the apprehension would want a device
to keep me with him till the danger of having our meeting discovered
might throw me absolutely into his power to avoid my own worse usage 
and the mischiefs which might have ensued perhaps in my very sight had
my friends and he met 

but if it shall come out that the person within the garden was his
corrupted implement employed to frighten me away with him do you
think my dear that i shall not have reason to hate him and myself
still more i hope his heart cannot be so deep and so vile a one i hope
it cannot but how came it to pass that one man could get out at the
garden-door and no more how that that man kept aloof as it were 
and pursued us not nor ran back to alarm the house my fright and my
distance would not let me be certain but really this man as i now
recollect had the air of that vile joseph leman 

o why why my dear friends but wherefore blame i them when i had
argued myself into a hope not improbable that even the dreadful
trial i was to undergo so soon might turn out better than if i had been
directly carried away from the presence of my once indulgent parents 
who might possibly intend that trial to be the last i should have had 

would to heaven that i had stood it however then if i had afterwards
done what now i have been prevailed upon or perhaps foolishly
frightened to do i should not have been stung so much by inward
reproach as now i am and this would have been a great evil avoided 

you know my dear that your clarissa's mind was ever above justifying
her own failings by those of others god forgive those of my friends
who have acted cruelly by me but their faults are their own and
not excuses for mine and mine began early for i ought not to have
corresponded with him 

o the vile encroacher how my indignation at times rises at him thus
to lead a young creature too much indeed relying upon her own strength 
from evil to evil this last evil although the remote yet sure
consequence of my first my prohibited correspondence by a father early
prohibited 

how much more properly had i acted with regard to that correspondence 
had i once for all when he was forbidden to visit me and i to receive
his visits pleaded the authority by which i ought to have been bound 
and denied to write to him but i thought i could proceed or stop as
i pleased i supposed it concerned me more than any other to be
the arbitress of the quarrels of unruly spirits and now i find my
presumption punished punished as other sins frequently are by itself 

as to this last rashness now that it is too late i plainly see how
i ought to have conducted myself as he knew i had but one way of
transmitting to him the knowledge of what befel me as he knew that my
fate was upon a crisis with my friends and that i had in my letter
to him reserved the liberty of revocation i should not have been
solicitous whether he had got my letter or not when he had come and
found i did not answer to his signal he would presently have resorted
to the loose bricks and there been satisfied by the date of my letter 
that it was his own fault that he had it not before but governed by
the same pragmatical motives which induced me to correspond with him at
first i was again afraid truly with my foolish and busy prescience 
and the disappointment would have thrown him into the way of receiving
fresh insults from the same persons which might have made him guilty
of some violence to them and so to save him an apprehended rashness 
i rushed into a real one myself and what vexes me more is that it is
plain to me now by all his behaviour that he had as great a confidence
in my weakness as i had in my own strength and so in a point entirely
relative to my honour he has triumphed for he has not been mistaken in
me while i have in myself 

tell me my dear miss howe tell me truly if your unbiassed heart does
not despise me it must for your mind and mine were ever one and
i despise myself and well i may for could the giddiest and most
inconsiderate girl in england have done worse than i shall appear to
have done in the eye of the world since my crime will be known without
the provocations and without the artifices of the betrayer too while
it will be a high aggravation that better things were expected from me
than from many others 

you charge me to marry the first opportunity ah my dear another of
the blessed effects of my folly that's as much in my power now as as
i am myself and can i besides give a sanction immediately to his
deluding arts can i avoid being angry with him for tricking me thus 
as i may say and as i have called it to him out of myself for
compelling me to take a step so contrary to all my resolutions and
assurances given to you a step so dreadfully inconvenient to myself so
disgraceful and so grievous as it must be to my dear mother were i to
be less regardful of any other of my family or friends you don't know 
nor can you imagine my dear how i am mortified how much i am sunk
in my own opinion i that was proposed for an example truly to
others o that i were again in my father's house stealing down with
a letter to you my heart beating with expectation of finding one from
you 


 


this is the wednesday morning i dreaded so much that i once thought
of it as the day of my doom but of the monday it is plain i ought to
have been most apprehensive had i staid and had the worst i
dreaded happened my friends would then have been answerable for the
consequences if any bad ones had followed but now i have only this
consolation left me a very poor one you'll say that i have cleared
them of blame and taken it all upon myself 

you will not wonder to see this narrative so dismally scrawled it is
owing to different pens and ink all bad and written in snatches of
time my hand trembling too with fatigue and grief 

i will not add to the length of it by the particulars of his behaviour
to me and of our conversation at st alban's and since because those
will come in course in the continuation of my story which no doubt 
you will expect from me 

only thus much will i say that he is extremely respectful even
obsequiously so at present though i am so much dissatisfied with
him and myself that he has hitherto had no great cause to praise my
complaisance to him indeed i can hardly at times bear the seducer in
my sight 

the lodgings i am in are inconvenient i shall not stay in them so it
signifies nothing to tell you how to direct to me hither and where my
next may be as yet i know not 

he knows that i am writing to you and has offered to send my letter 
when finished by a servant of his but i thought i could not be too
cautious as i am now situated in having a letter of this importance
conveyed to you who knows what such a man may do so very wicked
a contriver the contrivance if a contrivance to get me away so
insolently mean but i hope it is not a contrivance neither yet be
that as it will i must say that the best of him and of my prospects
with him are bad and yet having enrolled myself among the too-late
repenters who shall pity me 

nevertheless i will dare to hope for a continued interest in your
affections  i shall be miserable indeed if i may not   and to be
remembered in your daily prayers for neither time nor accident shall
ever make me cease to be

your faithful and affectionate clarissa harlowe 




letter iii

mr lovelace to joseph leman sat april 8 


honest joseph 

at length your beloved young lady has consented to free herself from
the cruel treatment she has so long borne she is to meet me without the
garden-door at about four o'clock on monday afternoon i told you she
had promised to do so she has confirmed her promise thank heaven she
has confirmed her promise 

i shall have a chariot-and-six ready in the by-road fronting the private
path to harlowe-paddock and several of my friends and servants not far
off armed to protect her if there be occasion but every one charged
to avoid mischief that you know has always been my principal care 

all my fear is that when she comes to the point the over-niceness of
her principles will make her waver and want to go back although her
honour is my honour you know and mine is her's if she should and
should i be unable to prevail upon her all your past services will
avail nothing and she will be lost to me for ever the prey then of
that cursed solmes whose vile stinginess will never permit him to do
good to any of the servants of the family 

i have no doubt of your fidelity honest joseph nor of your zeal to
serve an injured gentleman and an oppressed young lady you see by the
confidence i repose in you that i have not more particularly on this
very important occasion in which your assistance may crown the work 
for if she waver a little innocent contrivance will be necessary 

be very mindful therefore of the following directions take them into
your heart this will probably be your last trouble until my beloved
and i are joined in holy wedlock and then we will be sure to take care
of you you know what i have promised no man ever reproached me for
breach of word 

these then honest joseph are they 

contrive to be in the garden in disguise if possible and unseen by
your young lady if you find the garden-door unbolted you will know
that she and i are together although you should not see her go out at
it it will be locked but my key shall be on the ground just without
the door that you may open it with your's as it may be needful 

if you hear our voices parleying keep at the door till i cry hem hem 
twice but be watchful for this signal for i must not hem very loud 
lest she should take it for a signal perhaps in struggling to prevail
upon the dear creature i may have an opportunity to strike the door
hard with my elbow or heel to confirm you then you are to make a
violent burst against the door as if you would break it open drawing
backward and forward the bolt in a hurry then with another push but
with more noise than strength lest the lock give way cry out as if
you saw some of the family come up come up instantly here they
are here they are hasten this instant hasten and mention swords 
pistols guns with as terrible a voice as you can cry out with then
shall i prevail upon her no doubt if loth before to fly if i cannot 
i will enter the garden with her and the house too be the consequence
what it will but so affrighted these is no question but she will fly 

when you think us at a sufficient distance  and i shall raise my voice
urging her swifter flight that you may guess at that  then open the
door with your key but you must be sure to open it very cautiously 
lest we should not be far enough off i would not have her know you have
a hand in this matter out of my great regard to you 

when you have opened the door take your key out of the lock and put
it in your pocket then stooping for mine put it in the lock on the
inside that it may appear as if the door was opened by herself with
a key which they will suppose to be of my procuring it being new and
left open by us 

they should conclude she is gone off by her own consent that they may
not pursue us that they may see no hopes of tempting her back again in
either case mischief might happen you know 

but you must take notice that you are only to open the door with your
key in case none of the family come up to interrupt us and before we
are quite gone for if they do you'll find by what follows that you
must not open the door at all let them on breaking it open or by
getting over the wall find my key on the ground if they will 

if they do not come to interrupt us and if you by help of your key 
come out follow us at a distance and with uplifted hands and wild
impatient gestures running backward and forward for fear you
should come up too near us and as if you saw somebody coming to your
assistance cry out for help help and to hasten then shall we be
soon at the chariot 

tell the family that you saw me enter a chariot with her a dozen 
or more men on horseback attending us all armed some with
blunderbusses as you believe and that we took quite the contrary way
to that we should take 

you see honest joseph how careful i am as well as you to avoid
mischief 

observe to keep at such a distance that she may not discover who you
are take long strides to alter your gait and hold up your head 
honest joseph and she'll not know it to be you men's airs and gaits
are as various and peculiar as their faces pluck a stake out of one of
the hedges and tug at it though it may come easy this if she turn
back will look terrible and account for your not following us faster 
then returning with it shouldered to brag to the family what you
would have done could you have overtaken us rather than your young
lady should be carried off by such a and you may call me names 
and curse me and these airs will make you look valiant and in earnest 
you see honest joseph i am always contriving to give you reputation 
no man suffers by serving me 

but if our parley should last longer than i wish and if any of her
friends miss her before i cry hem hem twice then in order to save
yourself which is a very great point with me i assure you make the
same noise as above but as i directed before open not the door with
your key on the contrary wish for a key with all your heart but
for fear any of them should by accident have a key about them keep in
readiness half a dozen little gravel-stones no bigger than peas and
thrust two or three slily into the key-hole which will hinder their
key from turning round it is good you know joseph to provide against
every accident in such an important case as this and let this be your
cry instead of the other if any of my enemies come in your sight as
you seem to be trying to burst the door open sir sir or madam madam 
o lord hasten o lord hasten mr lovelace mr lovelace and very
loud and that shall quicken me more than it shall those you call
to if it be betty and only betty i shall think worse of your art
of making love than of your fidelity if you can't find a way to amuse
her and put her upon a false scent 


 see vol ii letter xxix 


you must tell them that your young lady seemed to run as fast off with
me as i with her this will also confirm to them that all pursuit is
in vain an end will hereby be put to solmes's hopes and her friends 
after a while will be more studious to be reconciled to her than to get
her back so you will be a happy instrument of great good to all round 
and this will one day be acknowledged by both families you will then be
every one's favourite and every good servant for the future will be
proud to be likened to honest joseph leman 

if she should guess at you or find you out i have it already in my
head to write a letter for you to copy which occasionally produced 
will set you right with her 


 see vol iii letter xxi 


this one time be diligent be careful this will be the crown of all 
and once more depend for a recompense upon the honour of

your assured friend r lovelace 

you need not be so much afraid of going too far with betty if you
should make a match with her she is a very likely creature though
a vixen as you say i have an admirable receipt to cure a termagant
wife never fear joseph but thou shalt be master of thine house if
she be very troublesome i can teach thee how to break her heart in a
twelvemonth and honestly too or the precept would not be mine 

i enclose a new earnest of my future favour 




letter iv

to robert lovelace esquier his honner sunday morning april 9 


honnered sir 

i must confesse i am infinitely obliged to your honner's bounty but
this last command it seems so intricket lord be merciful to me how
have i been led from littel stepps to grate stepps and if i should
be found out but your honner says you will take me into your honner's
sarvise and protect me if as i should at any time be found out 
and raise my wages besides or set me upp in a good inne which is my
ambishion and you will be honnerable and kind to my dearest young lady 
god love her but who can be unkind to she 

i wil do my best i am able since your honner will be apt to lose her 
as your honner says if i do not and a man so stingie will be apt
to gain her but mayhap my deareste young lady will not make all this
trubble needful if she has promissed she will stand to it i dare to
say 

i love your honner for contriveing to save mischiff so well i thought
till i know'd your honner that you was verry mischevous and plese
your honner but find it to be clene contrary your honner it is plane 
means mighty well by every body as far as i see as i am sure i do
myself for i am althoff a very plane man and all that a very honnest
one i thank my god and have good principels and have kept my young
lady's pressepts always in mind for she goes no where but saves a soul
or two more or less 

so commending myself to your honner's further favour not forgetting
the inne when your honner shall so please and good one offers for
plases are no inherritanses now-a-days and i hope your honner will
not think me a dishonest man for sarving your honner agenst my duty as
it may look but only as my conshence clears me 

be pleased howsomever if it like your honner not to call me honest
joseph so often for althoff i think myself verry honnest and all
that yet i am touched a littel for fear i should not do the quite
right thing and too besides your honner has such a fesseshious way
with you as that i hardly know whether you are in jest or earnest when
your honner calls me honnest so often 

i am a very plane man and seldom have writ to such honourable
gentlemen so you will be good enuff to pass by every thing as i have
often said and need not now say over again 

as to mrs betty i tho'te indeed she looked above me but she comes
on vere well natheless i could like her better iff she was better to
my young lady but she has too much wit for so plane a man natheless 
if she was to angre me althoff it is a shame to bete a woman yet i
colde make shift to throe my hat at her or so your honner 

but that same reseit iff your honner so please to cure a shrewish
wife it would more encurrege to wed iff so be one know'd it
before-hand as one may say so likewise if one knoed one could
honnestly as your honner says and as of the handy-work of god in one
twelvemonth 

but i shall grow impertinent to such a grate man and hereafter may
do for that as she turnes out for one mought be loth to part with her 
mayhap so verry soon too espessially if she was to make the notable
landlady your honner put into my head 

butt wonce moer begging your honner's parden and promissing all
dilligence and exsackness i reste 

your honner's dewtiful sarvant to command joseph leman 




letter v

mr lovelace to john belford esq st alban's monday night 


i snatch a few moments while my beloved is retired  as i hope to
rest   to perform my promise no pursuit nor have i apprehensions of
any though i must make my charmer dread that there will be one 

and now let me tell thee that never was joy so complete as mine but
let me inquire is not the angel flown away 


 


o no she is in the next apartment securely mine mine for ever 

 o ecstasy my heart will burst my breast 
 to leap into her bosom 

i knew that the whole stupid family were in a combination to do my
business for me i told thee that they were all working for me like so
many ground moles and still more blind than the moles are said to be 
unknowing that they did so i myself the director of their principal
motions which falling in with the malice of their little hearts they
took to be all their own 

but did i say my joy was perfect o no it receives some abatement
from my disgusted bride for how can i endure to think that i owe more
to her relations' precautions than to her favour for me or even as
far as i know to her preference of me to another man 

but let me not indulge this thought were i to do so it might cost my
charmer dear let me rejoice that she has passed the rubicon that she
cannot return that as i have ordered it the flight will appear to the
implacables to be altogether with her own consent and that if i doubt
her love i can put her to trials as mortifying to her niceness as
glorious to my pride for let me tell thee dearly as i love her if
i thought there was but the shadow of a doubt in her mind whether she
preferred me to any man living i would shew her no mercy 


tuesday day-dawn 

but on the wings of love i fly to my charmer who perhaps by this time
is rising to encourage the tardy dawn i have not slept a wink of the
hour and half i lay down to invite sleep it seems to me that i am not
so much body as to require such a vulgar renovation 

but why as in the chariot as in the inn at alighting all
heart-bursting grief my dearest creature so persecuted as thou wert
persecuted so much in danger of the most abhorred compulsion yet
grief so unsuspectedly sincere for an escape so critical take care 
take care o beloved of my soul for jealous is the heart in which love
has erected a temple to thee 

yet it must be allowed that such a sudden transition must affect her 
must ice her over when a little more used to her new situation when
her hurries are at an end when she sees how religiously i shall
observe all her injunctions she will undoubtedly have the gratitude
to distinguish between the confinement she has escaped from and the
liberty she has reason to rejoice in 

she comes she comes and the sun is just rising to attend her adieu 
be half as happy as i am for all diffidencies like night-fogs before
the sun disperse at her approach and next myself thou wilt be the
happiest man in the world 




letter vi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wednesday april 12 


i will pursue my melancholy story 

being thus hurried to the chariot it would have been to no purpose to
have refused entering into it had he not in my fright lifted me in as
he did and it instantly drove away a full gallop and stopped not till
it brought us to st alban's which was just as the day shut in 

i thought i should have fainted several times by the way with uplifted
hands and eyes god protect me said i often to myself can it be i 
that am here my eyes running over and my heart ready to burst with
sighs as involuntarily as my flight 

how different how inexpressibly different the gay wretch visibly
triumphing as i could not but construe his almost rapturous joy in the
success of his arts but overflowing with complimental flourishes yet
respectfully distant his address all the way we flew for that rather
than galloping was the motion of the horses which took as i believe 
a round-about way to prevent being traced 

i have reason to think there were other horsemen at his devotion three
or four different persons above the rank of the servants galloping by
us now-and-then on each side of the chariot but he took no notice
of them and i had too much grief mingled with indignation 
notwithstanding all his blandishments to ask any questions about them 
or any thing else 

think my dear what were my thoughts on alighting from the chariot 
having no attendant of my own sex no clothes but what i had on and
those little suited to such a journey as i had already taken and was
still to take neither hood nor hat nor any thing but a handkerchief
round my head and shoulders fatigued to death my mind still more
fatigued than my body and in such a foam the horses that every one in
the inn we put up at guessed  they could not do otherwise  that i was
a young giddy creature who had run away from her friends this it was
easy to see by their whispering and gaping more of the people of the
house also coming in by turns than were necessary for the attendance 

the mistress of the house whom he sent in to me showed me another
apartment and seeing me ready to faint brought me hartshorn and water 
and then upon my desiring to be left alone for half an hour retired 
for i found my heart ready to burst on revolving every thing in my
thoughts and the moment she was gone fastening the door i threw
myself into an old great chair and gave way to a violent flood of
tears which a little relieved me 

mr lovelace sooner than i wished sent up the gentlewoman who pressed
me in his name to admit my brother or to come down to him for he had
told her i was his sister and that he had brought me against my will 
and without warning from a friend's house where i had been all the
winter in order to prevent my marrying against the consent of my
friends to whom he was now conducting me and that having given me no
time for a travelling-dress i was greatly offended at him 

so my dear your frank your open-hearted friend was forced to
countenance this tale which indeed suited me the better because i was
unable for some time to talk speak or look up and so my dejection 
and grief and silence might very well pass before the gentlewoman and
her niece who attended me as a fit of sullenness 

the room i was in being a bed-chamber i chose to go down at his
repeated message attended by the mistress of the house to that in
which he was he approached me with great respect yet not exceeding
a brotherly politeness where a brother is polite and calling me his
dearest sister asked after the state of my mind and hoped i would
forgive him for never brother half so well loved a sister as he me 

a wretch how naturally did he fall into the character although i was
so much out of mine 

unthinking creatures have some comfort in the shortness of their views 
in their unapprehensiveness and that they penetrate not beyond the
present moment in short that they are unthinking but for a person of
my thoughtful disposition who has been accustomed to look forward as
well to the possible as to the probable what comfort can i have in my
reflections 

but let me give you the particulars of our conversation a little before
and after our supper-time joining both in one 

when we were alone he besought me i cannot say but with all the tokens
of a passionate and respectful tenderness to be better reconciled to
myself and to him he repeated all the vows of honour and inviolable
affection that he ever made me he promised to be wholly governed by me
in every future step he asked me to give him leave to propose whether
i chose to set out next day to either of his aunts 

i was silent i knew not what to say nor what to do 

whether i chose to have private lodgings procured for me in either of
those ladies' neighbourhood as were once my thoughts 

i was still silent 

whether i chose to go to either of lord m s seats that of berks or
that in the county we were in 

in lodgings i said any where where he was not to be 

he had promised this he owned and he would religiously keep to his
word as soon as he found all danger of pursuit over and that i was
settled to my mind but if the place were indifferent to me london was
the safest and the most private and his relations should all visit
me there the moment i thought fit to admit them his cousin charlotte 
particularly should attend me as my companion if i would accept of
her as soon as she was able to go abroad mean time would i go to lady
betty lawrance's lady sarah was a melancholy woman i should be the
most welcome guest she ever received 

i told him i wished not to go immediately however and in the frame
i was in and not likely to be out of to any of his relations that my
reputation was concerned to have him absent from me that if i were in
some private lodging the meaner the less to be suspected as it would
be known that i went away by his means and he would be supposed to
have provided me handsome accommodations it would be most suitable
both to my mind and to my situation that this might be best i should
think in the country for me in town for him and no matter how soon he
was known to be there 

if he might deliver his opinion he said it was that since i declined
going to any of his relations london was the only place in the world
to be private in every new comer in a country town or village excited a
curiosity a person of my figure  and many compliments he made me  would
excite more even messages and letters where none used to be brought 
would occasion inquiry he had not provided a lodging any where 
supposing i would choose to go either to london where accommodations of
that sort might be fixed upon in an hour's time or to lady betty's or
to lord m s herfordshire seat where was the housekeeper an excellent
woman mrs greme such another as my norton 

to be sure i said if i were pursued it would be in their first
passion and some one of his relations' houses would be the place they
would expect to find me at i knew not what to do 

my pleasure should determine him he said be it what it would only
that i were safe was all he was solicitous about he had lodgings in
town but he did not offer to propose them he knew i would have more
objections to go to them than i could to go to lord m s or to lady
betty's 

no doubt of it i replied with such an indignation in my manner as
made him run over with professions that he was far from proposing them 
or wishing for my acceptance of them and again he repeated that my
honour and safety were all he was solicitous about assuring me that my
will should be a law to him in every particular 

i was too peevish and too much afflicted and indeed too much incensed
against him to take well any thing he said 

i thought myself i said extremely unhappy i knew not what to
determine upon my reputation now no doubt utterly ruined destitute
of clothes unfit to be seen by any body my very indigence as i might
call it proclaiming my folly to every one who saw me who would suppose
that i had been taken at advantage or had given an undue one and had
no power over either my will or my actions that i could not but think i
had been dealt artfully with that he had seemed to have taken what he
might suppose the just measure of my weakness founded on my youth and
inexperience that i could not forgive myself for meeting him that my
heart bled for the distresses of my father and mother on this occasion 
that i would give the world and all my hopes in it to have been still
in my father's house whatever had been my usage that let him protest
and vow what he would i saw something low and selfish in his love that
he could study to put a young creature upon making such a sacrifice of
her duty and conscience when a person actuated by a generous love 
must seek to oblige the object of it in every thing essential to her
honour and to her peace of mind 

he was very attentive to all i said never offering to interrupt me
once his answer to every article almost methodically shewed his
memory 

what i had said he told me made him very grave and he would answer
accordingly 

he was grieved at his heart to find that he had so little share in my
favour or confidence 

as to my reputation he must be very sincere with me that could not
suffer half so much by the step i so regretted to have taken as by the
confinement and equally foolish and unjust treatment i had met with
from my relations that every mouth was full of blame of them of my
brother and sister particularly and of wonder at my patience that he
must repeat what he had written to me he believed more than once that
my friends themselves expected that i should take a proper opportunity
to free myself from their persecutions why else did they confine me 
that my exalted character as he called it would still bear me out 
with those who knew me who knew my brother's and sister's motives and
who knew the wretch they were for compelling me to have 

with regard to clothes who as matters were circumstanced could
expect that i should be able to bring away any others than those i had
on at the time for present use or wear all the ladies of his family
would take a pride to supply me for future the product of the best
looms not only in england but throughout the world were at my
command 

if i wanted money as no doubt i must he should be proud to supply me 
would to heaven he might presume to hope there were but one interest
between us 

and then he would fain have had me to accept of a bank note of a hundred
pounds which unawares to me he put into my hand but which you may
be sure i refused with warmth 

he was inexpressibly grieved and surprised he said to hear me say
he had acted artfully by me he came provided according to my confirmed
appointment   a wretch to upbraid me thus   to redeem me from my
persecutors and little expected a change of sentiment and that he
should have so much difficulty to prevail upon me as he had met with 
that perhaps i might think his offer to go into the garden with me and
to face my assembled relations was a piece of art only but that if i
did i wronged him since to this hour seeing my excessive uneasiness 
he wished with all his soul he had been permitted to accompany me in 
it was always his maxim to brave a threatened danger threateners where
they have an opportunity to put in force their threats were seldom
to be feared but had he been assured of a private stab or of as many
death's wounds as there were persons in my family made desperate as
he should have been by my return he would have attended me into the
house 

so my dear what i have to do is to hold myself inexcusable for
meeting such a determined and audacious spirit that's all i have
hardly any question now but that he would have contrived some wicked
stratagem or other to have got me away had i met him at a midnight
hour as once or twice i had thoughts to do and that would have been
more terrible still 

he concluded this part of his talk with saying that he doubted not
but that had he attended me in he should have come off in every
one's opinion well that he should have had general leave to renew his
visits 

he went on he must be so bold as to tell me that he should have paid
a visit of this kind but indeed accompanied by several of his trusty
friends had i not met him and that very afternoon too for he could
not tamely let the dreadful wednesday come without making some effort
to change their determinations 

what my dear was to be done with such a man 

that therefore for my sake as well as for his own he had reason to
wish that a disease so desperate had been attempted to be overcome by as
desperate a remedy we all know said he that great ends are sometimes
brought about by the very means by which they are endeavoured to be
frustrated 

my present situation i am sure thought i affords a sad evidence of
this truth 

i was silent all this time my blame was indeed turned inward 
sometimes too i was half-frighted at his audaciousness at others had
the less inclination to interrupt him being excessively fatigued and
my spirits sunk to nothing with a view even of the best prospects with
such a man 

this gave his opportunity to proceed and that he did assuming a still
more serious air 

as to what further remained for him to say in answer to what i had
said he hoped i would pardon him but upon his soul he was concerned 
infinitely concerned he repeated his colour and his voice rising 
that it was necessary for him to observe how much i chose rather to
have run the risque of being solmes's wife than to have it in my power
to reward a man who i must forgive him had been as much insulted on my
account as i had been on his who had watched my commands and pardon
me madam ever changeable motion of your pen all hours in all
weathers and with a cheerfulness and ardour that nothing but the most
faithful and obsequious passion could inspire 

i now my dear began to revive into a little more warmth of
attention 

and all madam for what  how i stared for he stopt then a moment
or two only  went he on to prevail upon you to free yourself from
ungenerous and base oppressions' 

sir sir indignantly said i 

hear me but out dearest madam my heart is full i must speak what
i have to say to be told for your words are yet in my ears and at my
heart that you would give the world and all your hopes in it to have
been still in your cruel and gloomy father's house' 

not a word sir against my father i will not bear that 

whatever had been your usage and you have a credulity madam against
all probability if you believe you should have avoided being
solmes's wife that i have put you upon sacrificing your duty and
conscience yet dearest creature see you not the contradiction that
your warmth of temper has surprised you into when the reluctance
you shewed to the last to leave your persecutors has cleared your
conscience from the least reproach of this sort  

o sir sir are you so critical then are you so light in your anger as
to dwell upon words 

indeed my dear i have since thought that his anger was not owing to
that sudden impetus which cannot be easily bridled but rather was a
sort of manageable anger let loose to intimidate me 

forgive me madam i have just done have i not in your opinion 
hazarded my life to redeem you from oppression yet is not my reward 
after all precarious for madam have you not conditioned with me
 and hard as the condition is most sacredly will i observe it that
all my hope must be remote that you are determined to have it in your
power to favour or reject me totally as you please 

see my dear in every respect my condition changed for the worse is it
in my power to take your advice if i should think it ever so right to
take it 


 clarissa had been censured as behaving to mr lovelace in their first
conversation at st alban's and afterwards with too much reserve and
even with haughtiness surely those who have thought her to blame on
this account have not paid a due attention to the story how early as
above and in what immediately follows does he remind her of the terms
of distance which she had prescribed to him before she was in his
power in hopes to leave the door open for a reconciliation with
her friends which her heart was set upon and how artfully does he
 unrequired promise to observe the conditions in which she in her
present circumstances and situation in pursuance of miss howe's advice 
would gladly have dispensed with to say nothing of the resentment she
was under a necessity to shew at the manner of his getting her away in
order to justify to him the sincerity of her refusal to go off with him 
see in her subsequent letter to miss howe no ix her own sense upon
the subject 


and have you not furthermore declared  proceeded he that you will
engage to renounce me for ever if your friends insist upon that cruel
renunciation as the terms of being reconciled to you 

but nevertheless madam all the merit of having saved you from an
odious compulsion shall be mine i glory in it though i were to lose
you for ever as i see i am but too likely to do from your present
displeasure and especially if your friends insist upon the terms you
are ready to comply with 

that you are your own mistress through my means is i repeat my
boast as such i humbly implore your favour and that only upon the
conditions i have yielded to hope for it as i do now thus humbly 
 the proud wretch falling on one knee   your forgiveness for so long
detaining your ear and for all the plain dealing that my undesigning
heart would not be denied to utter by my lips 

o sir pray rise let the obliged kneel if one of us must kneel but 
nevertheless proceed not in this strain i beseech you you have had
a great deal of trouble about me but had you let me know in time that
you expected to be rewarded for it at the price of my duty i should
have spared you much of it 

far be it from me sir to depreciate merit so extraordinary but let me
say that had it not been for the forbidden correspondence i was teased
by you into and which i had not continued every letter for many
letters intended to be the last but because i thought you a sufferer
from my friends i had not been either confined or ill treated nor
would my brother's low-meant violence have had a foundation to work
upon 

i am far from thinking my case would have been so very desperate as you
imagine had i staid my father loved me in his heart he would not see
me before and i wanted only to see him and to be heard and a delay
of his sentence was the least thing i expected from the trial i was to
stand 

you are boasting of your merits sir let merit be your boast nothing
else can attract me if personal considerations had principal weight
with me either in solmes's disfavour or in your favour i shall
despise myself if you value yourself upon them in preference to the
person of the poor solmes i shall despise you 

you may glory in your fancied merits in getting me away but the cause
of your glory i tell you plainly is my shame 

make to yourself a title to my regard which i can better approve of or
else you will not have so much merit with me as you have with yourself 

but here sir like the first pair i at least driven out of my
paradise are we recriminating no more shall you need to tell me of
your sufferings and your merits your all hours and all weathers for
i will bear them in memory as long as i live and if it be impossible
for me to reward them be ever ready to own the obligation all that
i desire of you now is to leave it to myself to seek for some private
abode to take the chariot with you to london or elsewhere and if
i have any further occasion for your assistance and protection i will
signify it to you and be still further obliged to you 

you are warm my dearest life but indeed there is no occasion for it 
had i any views unworthy of my faithful love for you i should not have
been so honest in my declarations 

then he began again to vow the sincerity of his intentions 

but i took him up short i am willing to believe you sir it would
be insupportable but to suppose there were a necessity for such solemn
declarations  at this he seemed to collect himself as i may say into
a little more circumspection   if i thought there were i would not sit
with you here in a public inn i assure you although cheated hither 
as far as i know by methods you must excuse me sir which but
to suspect will hardly let me have patience either with you or with
myself but no more of this just now let me i beseech you good sir 
bowing  i was very angry   let me only know whether you intend to leave
me or whether i have only escaped from one confinement to another 

cheated hither as far as i know madam let you know and with that
air too charming though grievous to my heart if you have only
escaped from one confinement to another amazing perfectly amazing and
can there be a necessity for me to answer this you are absolutely your
own mistress it was very strange if you were not the moment you are
in a place of safety i will leave you to one condition only give me
leave to beg your consent it is this that you will be pleased now you
are so entirely in your own power to renew a promise voluntarily made
before voluntarily or i would not now presume to request it for
although i would not be thought capable of growing upon concession yet
i cannot bear to think of losing the ground your goodness had given
me room to hope i had gained that make up how you please with your
relations you will never marry any other man while i am living and
single unless i should be so wicked as to give new cause for high
displeasure 

i hesitate not to confirm this promise sir upon your own condition in
what manner do you expect to confirm it 

only madam by your word 

then i never will 

he had the assurance i was now in his power to salute me as a sealing
of my promise as he called it his motion was so sudden that i was not
aware of it it would have looked affected to be very angry yet i could
not be pleased considering this as a leading freedom from a spirit so
audacious and encroaching and he might see that i was not 

he passed all that by with an air peculiar to himself enough enough 
dearest madam and now let me beg of you but to conquer this dreadful
uneasiness which gives me to apprehend too much for my jealous love to
bear and it shall be my whole endeavour to deserve your favour and to
make you the happiest woman in the world as i shall be the happiest of
men 

i broke from him to write to you my preceding letter but refused to
send it by his servant as i told you the mistress of the house helped
me to a messenger who was to carry what you should give him to lord
m s seat in hertfordshire directed for mrs greme the housekeeper
there and early in the morning for fear of pursuit we were to set
out that way and there he proposed to change the chariot and six for a
chaise and pair of his own which he had at that seat as it would be a
less-noticed conveyance 

i looked over my little stock of money and found it to be no more
than seven guineas and some silver the rest of my stock was but fifty
guineas and that five more than i thought it was when my sister
challenged me as to the sum i had by me and those i left in my
escritoire little intending to go away with him 


 see vol i letter xliii 


indeed my case abounds with a shocking number of indelicate
circumstances among the rest i was forced to account to him who knew
i could have no clothes but what i had on how i came to have linen with
me for he could not but know i sent for it lest he should imagine
i had an early design to go away with him and made that part of the
preparation 

he most heartily wished he said for my mind's sake that your mother
would have afforded me her protection and delivered himself upon this
subject with equal freedom and concern 

there are my dear miss howe a multitude of punctilios and decorums 
which a young creature must dispense with who in a situation like
mine makes a man the intimate attendant of her person i could now 
i think give twenty reasons stronger than any i have heretofore
mentioned why women of the least delicacy should never think of
incurring the danger and the disgrace of taking the step i have been
drawn in to take but with horror and aversion and why they should look
upon the man who should tempt them to it as the vilest and most selfish
of seducers 


 


before five o'clock tuesday morning the maidservant came up to tell me
that my brother was ready and that breakfast also waited for me in
the parlour i went down with a heart as heavy as my eyes and received
great acknowledgements and compliments from him on being so soon
dressed and ready as he interpreted it to continue on our journey 

he had the thought which i had not for what had i to do with thinking who
had it not when i stood most in need of it to purchase for me a velvet
hood and a short cloke trimmed with silver without saying any thing
to me he must reward himself the artful encroacher said before the
landlady and her maids and niece for his forethought and would salute
his pretty sullen sister he took his reward and as he said before 
a tear with it while he assured me still before them  a vile wretch  
that i had nothing to fear from meeting with parents who so dearly loved
me 

how could i be complaisant my dear to such a man as this 

when we had got in the chariot and it began to move he asked me 
whether i had any objection to go to lord m s hertfordshire seat his
lordship he said was at his berkshire one 

i told him i chose not to go as yet to any of his relations for that
would indicate a plain defiance to my own my choice was to go to a
private lodging and for him to be at a distance from me at least till
i heard how things were taken by my friends for that although i had
but little hopes of a reconciliation as it was yet if they knew i was
in his protection or in that of any of his friends which would be
looked upon as the same thing there would not be room for any hopes at
all 

i should govern him as i pleased he solemnly assured me in every
thing but he still thought london was the best place for me and if i
were once safe there and in a lodging to my liking he would go to m 
hall but as i approved not of london he would urge it no further 

he proposed and i consented to put up at an inn in the neighbourhood
of the lawn as he called lord m s seat in this county since i chose
not to go thither and here i got two hours to myself which i told him
i should pass in writing another letter to you meaning my narrative 
which though greatly fatigued i had begun at st alban's and in one
to my sister to apprise the family whether they were solicitous about
it or not that i was well and to beg that my clothes some particular
books and the fifty guineas i had left in my escritoire might be sent
me 

he asked if i had considered whither to have them directed 

indeed not i i told him i was a stranger to 

so was he he interrupted me but it struck him by chance 

wicked story-teller 

but added he i will tell you madam how it shall be managed if
you don't choose to go to london it is nevertheless best that your
relations should think you there for then they will absolutely despair
of finding you if you write be pleased to direct to be left for you 
at mr osgood's near soho-square mr osgood is a man of reputation 
and this will effectually amuse them 

amuse them my dear amuse whom my father my uncles but it must
be so all his expedients ready you see 

i had no objection to this and i have written accordingly but what
answer i shall have or whether any that is what gives me no small
anxiety 

this however is one consolation that if i have an answer and
although my brother should be the writer it cannot be more severe than
the treatment i have of late received from him and my sister 

mr lovelace staid out about an hour and half and then came in 
impatiently sending up to me no less than four times to desire
admittance but i sent him word as often that i was busy and at last 
that i should be so till dinner was ready he then hastened that as i
heard him now-and-then with a hearty curse upon the cook and waiters 

this is another of his perfections i ventured afterwards to check him
for his free words as we sat at dinner 

having heard him swear at his servant when below whom nevertheless 
he owns to be a good one it is a sad life said i these innkeepers
live mr lovelace 

no pretty well i believe but why madam think you that fellows who
eat and drink at other men's cost or they are sorry innkeepers should
be entitled to pity 

because of the soldiers they are obliged to quarter who are generally 
i believe wretched profligates bless me said i how i heard one of
them swear and curse just now at a modest meek man as i judge by his
low voice and gentle answers well do they make it a proverb like a
trooper 

he bit his lip arose turned upon his heel stept to the glass and
looking confidently abashed if i may say so ay madam said he 
these troopers are sad swearing fellows i think their officers should
chastise them for it 

i am sure they deserve chastisement replied i for swearing is a most
unmanly vice and cursing as poor and low a one since they proclaim the
profligate's want of power and his wickedness at the same time for 
could such a one punish as he speaks he would be a fiend 

charmingly observed by my soul madam the next trooper i hear swear
and curse i'll tell him what an unmanly and what a poor wretch he is 

mrs greme came to pay her duty to me as mr lovelace called it and
was very urgent with me to go to her lord's house letting me know what
handsome things she had heard of her lord and his two nieces and all
the family say of me and what wishes for several months past they had
put up for the honour she now hoped would soon be done them all 

this gave me some satisfaction as it confirmed from the mouth of a very
good sort of woman all that mr lovelace had told me 

upon inquiry about a private lodging she recommended me to a
sister-in-law of hers eight miles from thence where i now am and what
pleased me the better was that mr lovelace of whom i could see she
was infinitely observant obliged her of his own motion to accompany
me in the chaise himself riding on horseback with his two servants 
and one of lord m s and here we arrived about four o'clock 

but as i told you in my former the lodgings are inconvenient mr 
lovelace indeed found great fault with them and told mrs greme who
had said that they were not worthy of us that they came not up even to
her own account of them as the house was a mile from a town it was not
proper for him he said to be so far distant from me lest any thing
should happen and yet the apartments were not separate and distinct
enough for me to like them he was sure 

this must be agreeable enough for him you will believe 

mrs greme and i had a good deal of talk in the chaise about him she
was very easy and free in her answers to all i asked and has i find a
very serious turn 

i led her on to say to the following effect some part of it not unlike
what lord m s dismissed bailiff had said before by which i find that
all the servants have a like opinion of him 

that mr lovelace was a generous man that it was hard to say whether
the servants of her lord's family loved or feared him most that her
lord had a very great affection for him that his two noble aunts were
not less fond of him that his cousins montague were as good natured
young ladies as ever lived that lord m and lady sarah and lady betty
had proposed several ladies to him before he made his addresses to me 
and even since despairing to move me and my friends in his favour but
that he had no thoughts of marrying at all she had heard him say if it
were not to me that as well her lord as the two ladies his sisters were
a good deal concerned at the ill-usage he received from my family but
admired my character and wished to have him married to me although i
were not to have a shilling in preference to any other person from the
opinion they had of the influence i should have over him that to be
sure mr lovelace was a wild gentleman but wildness was a distemper
which would cure itself that her lord delighted in his company 
whenever he could get it but that they often fell out and his lordship
was always forced to submit indeed was half afraid of him she
believed for mr lovelace would do as he pleased she mingled a
thousand pities often that he acted not up to the talents lent him yet
would have it that he had fine qualities to found a reformation upon 
and when the happy day came would make amends for all and of this all
his friends were so assured that they wished for nothing so earnestly 
as for his marriage 

this indifferent as it is is better than my brother says of him 

the people of the house here are very honest-looking industrious folks 
mrs sorlings is the gentlewoman's name the farm seems well stocked 
and thriving she is a widow has two sons men grown who vie with each
other which shall take most pains in promoting the common good and they
are both of them i already see more respectful to two modest young
women their sisters than my brother was to his sister 

i believe i must stay here longer than at first i thought i should 

i ought to have mentioned that before i set out for this place i
received your kind letter every thing is kind from so dear a friend 


 see vol ii letter xlvii 


i own that after i had told you of my absolute determination not to go
away with him you might well be surprised at your first hearing that
i was actually gone the lord bless me my dear i myself at times can
hardly believe it is i that have been led to take so strange a step 

i have not the better opinion of mr lovelace for his extravagant
volubility he is too full of professions he says too many fine things
of me and to me true respect true value i think lies not in words 
words cannot express it the silent awe the humble the doubting eye 
and even the hesitating voice better shew it by much than as our
beloved shakespeare says 

 the rattling tongue
 of saucy and audacious eloquence 

the man indeed at times is all upon the ecstatic one of his phrases 
but to my shame and confusion i must say that i know too well to what
to attribute his transports in one word it is to his triumph my
dear and to impute it to that perhaps equally exposes my vanity and
condemns my folly 

we have been alarmed with notions of a pursuit founded upon a letter
from his intelligencer 

how do different circumstances either sanctify or condemn the same
action what care ought we to take not to confound the distinctions of
right and wrong when self comes in the question i condemned in mr 
lovelace the corrupting of a servant of my father's and now i am glad
to give a kind of indirect approbation of that fault by inquiring of
him what he hears by that or any other way of the manner in which my
relations took my flight a preconcerted forward and artful flight it
must undoubtedly appear to them how grievous is that to think of yet
how as long as i am situated can i put them right 

most heavily he says they take it but shew not so much grief as rage 
and he can hardly have patience to hear of the virulence and menaces
of my brother against himself then a merit is made to me of his
forbearance 

what a satisfaction am i robbed of my dearest friend when i reflect
upon my inconsiderateness o that i had it still in my power to say i
suffered wrong rather than did wrong that others were more wanting in
their kindness to me than i duty where duty is owing to them 

fie upon me for meeting the seducer let all end as happily as it now
may i have laid up for myself remorse for my whole life 

what still more concerns me is that every time i see this man i am
still at a greater loss than before what to make of him i watch every
turn of his countenance and i think i see very deep lines in it he
looks with more meaning i verily think than he used to look yet not
more serious not less gay i don't know how he looks but with more
confidence a great deal than formerly and yet he never wanted that 

but here is the thing i behold him with fear now as conscious of the
power my indiscretion has given him over me and well may he look more
elate when he sees me deprived of all the self-supposed significance 
which adorns and exalts a person who has been accustomed to respect and
who now by a conscious inferiority allows herself to be overcome 
and in a state of obligation as i may say to a man who from a humble
suitor to her for her favour assumes the consequence and airs of a
protector 

i shall send this as my former by a poor man who travels every day
with pedlary matters he will leave it at mrs knolly's as you direct 

if you hear any thing of my father and mother and of their health and
how my friends were affected by my unhappy step pray be so good as to
write me a few lines by the messenger if his waiting for them can be
known to you 

i am afraid to ask you whether upon reading that part of my narrative
already in your hands you think any sort of extenuation lies for

your unhappy clarissa harlowe 




letter vii

mr lovelace to john belford esq tuesday wedn april 11 12 


you claim my promise that i will be as particular as possible in
all that passes between me and my goddess indeed i never had a more
illustrious subject to exercise my pen and moreover i have leisure 
for by her good will my access would be as difficult to her as that of
the humblest slave to an eastern monarch nothing then but inclination
to write can be wanting and since our friendship and your obliging
attendance upon me at the white hart will not excuse that i will
endeavour to keep my word 

i parted with thee and thy brethren with a full resolution thou
knowest to rejoin ye if she once again disappointed me in order to go
together attended by our servants for shew sake to the gloomy father 
and demand audience of the tyrant upon the freedoms taken with my
character in short to have tried by fair resolutions and treat his
charming daughter with less inhumanity and me with more civility 

i told thee my reasons for not going in search of a letter of
countermand i was right for if i had i should have found such a one 
and had i received it she would not have met me did she think that
after i had been more than once disappointed i would not keep her to
her promise that i would not hold her to it when i had got her in so
deeply 

the moment i heard the door unbolt i was sure of her that motion
made my heart bound to my throat but when that was followed with the
presence of my charmer flashing upon me all at once in a flood of
brightness sweetly dressed though all unprepared for a journey i trod
air and hardly thought myself a mortal 

thou shalt judge of her dress as at the moment i first beheld her she
appeared to me and as upon a nearer observation she really was i am
a critic thou knowest in women's dresses many a one have i taught
to dress and helped to undress but there is such a native elegance in
this lady that she surpasses all that i could imagine surpassing but
then her person adorns what she wears more than dress can adorn her 
and that's her excellence 

expect therefore a faint sketch of her admirable person with her dress 

her wax-like flesh for after all flesh and blood i think she is by
its delicacy and firmness answers for the soundness of her health thou
hast often heard me launch out in praise of her complexion i never in
my life beheld a skins so illustriously fair the lily and the driven
snow it is nonsense to talk of her lawn and her laces one might indeed
compare to those but what a whited wall would a woman appear to be 
who had a complexion which would justify such unnatural comparisons but
this lady is all glowing all charming flesh and blood yet so clear 
that every meandring vein is to be seen in all the lovely parts of her
which custom permits to be visible 

thou has heard me also describe the wavy ringlets of her shining hair 
needing neither art nor powder of itself an ornament defying all
other ornaments wantoning in and about a neck that is beautiful beyond
description 

her head-dress was a brussels-lace mob peculiarly adapted to the
charming air and turn of her features a sky-blue ribband illustrated
that but although the weather was somewhat sharp she had not on either
hat or hood for besides that she loves to use herself hardily by
which means and by a temperance truly exemplary she is allowed to have
given high health and vigour to an originally tender constitution she
seems to have intended to shew me that she was determined not to stand
to her appointment o jack that such a sweet girl should be a rogue 

her morning gown was a pale primrose-coloured paduasoy the cuffs
and robins curiously embroidered by the fingers of this ever-charming
arachne in a running pattern of violets and their leaves the light in
the flowers silver gold in the leaves a pair of diamond snaps in
her ears a white handkerchief wrought by the same inimitable fingers
concealed o belford what still more inimitable beauties did it not
conceal and i saw all the way we rode the bounding heart by its
throbbing motions i saw it dancing beneath her charming umbrage 

her ruffles were the same as her mob her apron a flowered lawn her
coat white sattin quilted blue sattin her shoes braided with the same
colour without lace for what need has the prettiest foot in the world
of ornament neat buckles in them and on her charming arms a pair of
black velvet glove-like muffs of her own invention for she makes and
gives fashions as she pleases her hands velvet of themselves thus
uncovered the freer to be grasped by those of her adorer 

i have told thee what were my transports when the undrawn bolt
presented to me my long-expected goddess her emotions were more sweetly
feminine after the first moments for then the fire of her starry eyes
began to sink into a less dazzling languor she trembled nor knew
she how to support the agitations of a heart she had never found so
ungovernable she was even fainting when i clasped her in my supporting
arms what a precious moment that how near how sweetly near the
throbbing partners 

by her dress i saw as i observed before how unprepared she was for
a journey and not doubting her intention once more to disappoint me i
would have drawn her after me then began a contention the most vehement
that ever i had with woman it would pain thy friendly heart to be told
the infinite trouble i had with her i begged i prayed on my knees 
yet in vain i begged and prayed her to answer her own appointment and
had i not happily provided for such a struggle knowing whom i had to
deal with i had certainly failed in my design and as certainly would
have accompanied her in without thee and thy brethren and who knows
what might have been the consequence 

but my honest agent answering my signal though not quite so soon as i
expected in the manner thou knowest i had prescribed they are coming 
they are coming fly fly my beloved creature cried i drawing my
sword with a flourish as if i would have slain half an hundred of the
supposed intruders and seizing her trembling hands i drew her after
me so swiftly that my feet winged by love could hardly keep pace with
her feet agitated by fear and so i became her emperor 

i'll tell thee all when i see thee and thou shalt then judge of my
difficulties and of her perverseness and thou wilt rejoice with me at
my conquest over such a watchful and open-eyed charmer 

but seest thou not now as i think i do the wind outstripping fair one
flying from her love to her love is there not such a game nay flying
from her friends she was resolved not to abandon to the man she was
determined not to go off with the sex the sex all over charming
contradiction hah hah hah hah i must here i must here lay down
my pen to hold my sides for i must have my laugh out now the fit is
upon me 


 


i believe i believe hah hah hah i believe jack my dogs conclude
me mad for here has one of them popt in as if to see what ailed me or
whom i had with me hah hah hah an impudent dog o jack knewest thou
my conceit and were but thy laugh joined to mine i believe it would
hold me for an hour longer 

but o my best beloved fair one repine not thou at the arts by which
thou suspectest thy fruitless vigilence has been over watched take
care that thou provokest not new ones that may be still more worthy
of thee if once thy emperor decrees thy fall thou shalt greatly fall 
thou shalt have cause if that come to pass which may come to pass for
why wouldst thou put off marriage to so long a day as till thou hadst
reason to be convinced of my reformation dearest thou shalt have
cause never fear to sit down more dissatisfied with the stars than
with thyself and come the worst to the worst glorious terms will i
give thee thy garrison with general prudence at the head and governor
watchfulness bringing up the rear shall be allowed to march out with
all the honours due to so brave a resistance and all thy sex and all
mine that hear of my stratagems and of thy conduct shall acknowledge
the fortress as nobly won as defended 

thou wilt not dare methinks i hear thee say to attempt to reduce such
a goddess as this to a standard unworthy of her excellencies it is
impossible lovelace that thou shouldst intent to break through oaths
and protestations so solemn 

that i did not intend it is certain that i do intend it i cannot my
heart my reverence for her will not let me say but knowest thou not
my aversion to the state of shackles and is she not in my power 

and wilt thou lovelace abuse that power which 

which what belford which i obtained not by her own consent but
against it 

but which thou never hadst obtained had she not esteemed thee above
all men 

and which i had never taken so much pains to obtain had i not loved her
above all women so far upon a par jack and if thou pleadest honour 
ought not honour to be mutual if mutual does it not imply mutual
trust mutual confidence and what have i had of that from her to boast
of thou knowest the whole progress of our warfare for a warfare it
has truly been and far very far from an amorous warfare too doubts 
mistrusts upbraidings on her part humiliations the most abject on
mine obliged to assume such airs of reformation that every varlet of
ye has been afraid i should reclaim in good earnest and hast thou not
thyself frequently observed to me how awkwardly i returned to my usual
gayety after i had been within a mile of her father's garden-wall 
although i had not seen her 

does she not deserve to pay for all this to make an honest fellow look
like an hypocrite what a vile thing is that 

then thou knowest what a false little rogue she has been how little
conscience she has made of disappointing me hast thou not been a
witness of my ravings on this score have i not in the height of them 
vowed revenge upon the faithless charmer and if i must be forsworn 
whether i answer her expectations or follow my own inclinations and if
the option be in my own power can i hesitate a moment which to choose 

then i fancy by her circumspection and her continual grief that she
expects some mischief from me i don't care to disappoint any body i
have a value for 

but o the noble the exalted creature who can avoid hesitating when he
thinks of an offence against her who can but pity 

yet on the other hand so loth at last to venture though threatened
to be forced into the nuptial fetters with a man whom to look upon as
a rival is to disgrace myself so sullen now she has ventured what
title has she to pity and to a pity which her pride would make her
disclaim 

but i resolve not any way i will see how her will works and how my
will leads me on i will give the combatants fair play and yet every
time i attend her i find that she is less in my power i more in hers 

yet a foolish little rogue to forbid me to think of marriage till i am
a reformed man till the implacables of her family change their natures 
and become placable 

it is true when she was for making those conditions she did not think 
that without any she should be cheated out of herself for so the dear
soul as i may tell thee in its place phrases it 

how it swells my pride to have been able to outwit such a vigilant
charmer i am taller by half a yard in my imagination than i was i look
down upon every body now last night i was still more extravagant i
took off my hat as i walked to see if the lace were not scorched 
supposing it had brushed down a star and before i put it on again in
mere wantonness and heart's ease i was for buffeting the moon 

in short my whole soul is joy when i go to bed i laugh myself asleep 
and i awake either laughing or singing yet nothing nearly in view 
neither for why i am not yet reformed enough 

i told thee at the time if thou rememberest how capable this
restriction was of being turned upon the over-scrupulous dear creature 
could i once get her out of her father's house and were i disposed to
punish her for her family's faults and for the infinite trouble she
herself had given me little thinks she that i have kept an account of
both and that when my heart is soft and all her own i can but turn
to my memoranda and harden myself at once 

o my charmer look to it abate of thy haughty airs value not thyself
upon thy sincerity if thou art indifferent to me i will not bear it
now art thou not in my power nor if thou lovest me think that
the female affectation of denying thy love will avail thee now with a
heart so proud and so jealous as mine remember moreover that all thy
family sins are upon thy head 

but ah jack when i see my angel when i am admitted to the presence of
this radiant beauty what will become of all this vapouring 

but be my end what it may i am obliged by thy penetration fair one 
to proceed by the sap fair and softly a wife at any time marriage
will be always in my power 

when put to the university the same course of initial studies will
qualify the yonker for the one line or the other the genius ought to
point out the future lawyer divine or physician so the same cautious
conduct with such a vigilance will do either for the wife or for the
no-wife when i reform i'll marry tis time enough for the one the
lady must say for the other say i 

but how i ramble this is to be in such a situation that i know not
what to resolve upon 

i'll tell thee my inclinings as i proceed the pro's and the con's i'll
tell thee but being got too far from the track i set out in i will
close here i may however write every day something and send it as
opportunity offers 

regardless nevertheless i shall be in all i write of connection 
accuracy or of any thing but of my own imperial will and pleasure 




letter viii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe wednesday night april 12 


i have your narrative my dear you are the same noble creature you
ever were above disguise above art above attempting to extenuate a
failing 

the only family in the world yours surely that could have driven such
a daughter upon such extremities 

but you must not be so very much too good for them and for the case 

you lay the blame so properly and so unsparingly upon your meeting him 
that nothing can be added to that subject by your worst enemies were
they to see what you have written 

i am not surprised now i have read your narrative that so bold and so
contriving a man i am forced to break off 


 


you stood it out much better and longer here again comes my bustling 
jealous mother 


 


don't be angry at yourself did you not do for the best at the time as
to your first fault the answering his letters it was always incumbent
upon you to assume the guardianship of such a family when the bravo of
it had run riot as he did and brought himself into danger 

except your mother who has no will of her own have any of them common
sense 

forgive me my dear here is that stupid uncle antony of yours a
pragmatical conceited positive he came yesterday in a fearful
pucker and puffed and blowed and stumped about our hall and parlour 
while his message was carried up 

my mother was dressing these widows are as starched as the old
bachelors she would not see him in a dishabille for the world what can
she mean by it 

his errand was to set her against you and to shew her their determined
rage on your going away the issue proved too evidently that this was
the principal end of his visit 

the odd creature desired to speak with her alone i am not used to such
exceptions whenever any visits are made to my mother 

when she was primed out down she came to him they locked themselves
in the two positive heads were put together close together i suppose 
for i listened but could hear nothing distinctly though they both
seemed full of their subject 

i had a good mind once or twice to have made them open the door 
could i have been sure of keeping but tolerably my temper i would have
demanded admittance but i was afraid if i had obtained it that i
should have forgot it was my mother's house and been for turning
him out of it to come to rave against and abuse my dearest dearest 
faultless friend and the ravings to be encouraged and perhaps joined
in in order to justify themselves the one for contributing to drive
that dear friend out of her father's house the other for refusing her
a temporary asylum till the reconciliation could have been effected 
which her dutiful heart was set upon and which it would have become
the love which my mother had ever pretended for you to have mediated
for could i have had patience 

the issue as i said shewed what the errand was its fusty appearance 
after the old fusty fellow was marched off  you must excuse me my
dear   was in a kind of gloomy harlowe-like reservedness in my mother 
which upon a few resenting flirts of mine was followed by a rigorous
prohibition of correspondence 

this put us you may suppose upon terms not the most agreeable i
desired to know if i were prohibited dreaming of you for my dear 
you have all my sleeping as well as waking hours 

i can easily allow for your correspondence with your wretch at first
 and yet your notions were excellent by the effect this prohibition has
upon me since if possible it has made me love you better than before 
and i am more desirous than ever of corresponding with you 

but i have nevertheless a much more laudable motive i should think
myself the unworthiest of creatures could i be brought to slight a
dear friend and such a meritorious one in her distress i would die
first and so i told my mother and i have desired her not to watch me
in my retired hours nor to insist upon my lying with her constantly 
which she now does more earnestly than ever twere better i told her 
that the harlowe-betty were borrowed to be set over me 

mr hickman who so greatly honours you has unknown to me interposed
so warmly in your favour with my mother that it makes for him no small
merit with me 

i cannot at present write to every particular unless i would be in
set defiance tease tease tease for ever the same thing though
answered fifty times over in every hour to be repeated lord bless
me what a life must my poor father but let me remember to whom i am
writing 

if this ever-active ever-mischievous monkey of a man this lovelace 
contrived as you suspect but here comes my mother again ay stay a
little longer my mamma if you please i can but be suspected i can
but be chidden for making you wait and chidden i am sure to be whether
i do or not in the way you my good mamma are antony'd into 

bless me how impatient she is how she thunders at the door this
moment madam how came i to double-lock myself if what have i done
with the key duce take the key dear madam you flutter one so 


 


you may believe my dear that i took care of my papers before i opened
the door we have had a charming dialogue she flung from me in a
passion 

so what's now to be done sent for down in a very peremptory manner 
i assure you what an incoherent letter will you have when i get it
to you but now i know where to send it mr hickman shall find me a
messenger yet if he be detected poor soul he will be harlowed-off 
as well as his meek mistress 


thursday april 13 

i have this moment your continuation-letter and am favoured at
present with the absence of my argus-eyes mother 

dear creature i can account for all your difficulties a young lady of
your delicacy and with such a man i must be brief 

the man's a fool my dear with all his pride and with all his
complaisance and affected regards to your injunctions yet his ready
inventions 

sometimes i think you should go to lady betty's i know not what to
advise you to do i should if you were not so intent upon reconciling
yourself to your relations yet they are implacable you can have no
hopes of them your uncle's errand to my mother may convince you of
that and if you have an answer to your letter to your sister that will
confirm you i dare say 

you need not to have been afraid of asking me whether upon reading your
narrative i thought any extenuation could lie for what you have done i
have as above before i had your question told you my mind as to that 
and i repeat i think your provocations and inducements considered 
that ever young creature was who took such a step 

but you took it not you were driven on one side and possibly tricked
on the other if any woman on earth shall be circumstanced as you were 
and shall hold out so long as you did against her persecutors on one
hand and her seducer on the other i will forgive her for all the rest
of her conduct be it what it will 

all your acquaintance you may suppose talk of nobody but you some
indeed bring your admirable character for a plea against you but nobody
does or can acquit your father and uncles 

every body seems apprized of your brother's and sister's motives your
flight is no doubt the very thing they aimed to drive you to by the
various attacks they made upon you unhoping as they must do all the
time the success of their schemes in solmes's behalf they knew that
if once you were restored to favour the suspended love of your father
and uncles like a river breaking down a temporary obstruction would
return with double force and that then you would expose and triumph
over all their arts and now i hear they enjoy their successful
malice 

your father is all rage and violence he ought i am sure to turn his
rage inward all your family accuse you of acting with deep art and are
put upon supposing that you are actually every hour exulting over them 
with your man in the success of it 

they all pretend now that your trial of wednesday was to be the last 

advantage would indeed my mother owns have been taken of your
yielding if you had yielded but had you not been prevailed upon they
would have given up their scheme and taken your promise for renouncing
lovelace believe them who will 

they own however that a minister was to be present mr solmes was
to be at hand and your father was previously to try his authority over
you in order to make you sign the settlements all of it a romantic
contrivance of your wild-headed foolish brother i make no doubt is
it likely that he and bell would have given way to your restoration to
favour supposing it in their power to hinder it on any other terms
than those their hearts had been so long set upon 

how they took your flight when they found it out may be better
supposed than described 

your aunt hervey it seems was the first that went down to the ivy
summer-house in order to acquaint you that their search was over 
betty followed her and they not finding you there went on towards the
cascade according to a hint of yours 

returning by the garden-door they met a servant  they don't say it was
joseph leman but it is very likely that it was he  running as he said 
from pursuing mr lovelace a great hedge-stake in his hand and out of
breath to alarm the family 

if it were this fellow and if he were employed in the double agency of
cheating them and cheating you what shall we think of the wretch you
are with run away from him my dear if so no matter to whom or marry
him if you cannot 

your aunt and all your family were accordingly alarmed by this
fellow evidently when too late for pursuit they got together and when
a posse ran to the place of interview and some of them as far as to
the tracks of the chariot wheels without stopping and having heard the
man's tale upon the spot a general lamentation a mutual upbraiding 
and rage and grief were echoed from the different persons according
to their different tempers and conceptions and they returned like fools
as they went 

your brother at first ordered horses and armed men to be got ready for
a pursuit solmes and your uncle tony were to be of the party but your
mother and your aunt hervey dissuaded them from it for fear of adding
evil to evil not doubting but lovelace had taken measures to support
himself in what he had done and especially when the servant declared 
that he saw you run with him as fast as you could set foot to the
ground and that there were several armed men on horseback at a small
distance off 


 


my mother's absence was owing to her suspicion that the knolly's were
to assist in our correspondence she made them a visit upon it she does
every thing at once and they have promised that no more letters shall
be left there without her knowledge 

but mr hickman has engaged one filmer a husbandman in the lane we call
finch-lane near us to receive them thither you will be pleased to
direct yours under cover to mr john soberton and mr hickman himself
will call for them there and there shall leave mine it goes against me
too to make him so useful to me he looks already so proud upon it 
i shall have him  who knows   give himself airs he had best consider 
that the favour he has been long aiming at may put him into a
very dangerous a very ticklish situation he that can oblige may
disoblige happy for some people not to have it in their power to
offend 

i will have patience if i can for a while to see if these bustlings
in my mother will subside but upon my word i will not long bear this
usage 

sometimes i am ready to think that my mother carries it thus on purpose
to tire me out and to make me the sooner marry if i find it to be so 
and that hickman in order to make a merit with me is in the low plot 
i will never bear him in my sight 

plotting wretch as i doubt your man is i wish to heaven that you
were married that you might brave them all and not be forced to hide
yourself and be hurried from one inconvenient place to another i
charge you omit not to lay hold on any handsome opportunity that may
offer for that purpose 

here again comes my mother 


 


we look mighty glum upon each other i can tell you she had not best
harlowe me at this rate i won't bear it 

i have a vast deal to write i know not what to write first yet my mind
is full and ready to run over 

i am got into a private corner of the garden to be out of her
way lord help these mothers do they think they can prevent a
daughter's writing or doing any thing she has a mind to do by
suspicion watchfulness and scolding they had better place a
confidence in one by half a generous mind scorns to abuse a generous
confidence 

you have a nice a very nice part to act with this wretch who yet has 
i think but one plain path before him i pity you but you must
make the best of the lot you have been forced to draw yet i see your
difficulties but if he do not offer to abuse your confidence i would
have you seem at least to place some in him 

if you think not of marrying soon i approve of your resolution to fix
somewhere out of his reach and if he know not where to find you so
much the better yet i verily believe they would force you back could
they but come at you if they were not afraid of him 

i think by all means you should demand of both your trustees to be put
in possession of your own estate mean time i have sixty guineas at your
service i beg you will command them before they are gone i'll take
care you shall be further supplied i don't think you'll have a shilling
or a shilling's worth of your own from your relations unless you extort
it from them 

as they believe you went away by your own consent they are it seems 
equally surprised and glad that you have left your jewels and money
behind you and have contrived for clothes so ill very little
likelihood this shews of their answering your requests 

indeed every one who knows not what i now know must be at a loss to
account for your flight as they will call it and how my dear can
one report it with any tolerable advantage to you to say you did not
intend it when you met him who will believe it to say that a person
of your known steadiness and punctilio was over-persuaded when you gave
him the meeting how will that sound to say you were tricked out of
yourself and people were given credit to it how disreputable and
while unmarried and yet with him the man a man of such a character 
what would it not lead a censuring world to think 

i want to see how you put it in your letter for your clothes 

as you may depend upon all the little spiteful things they can offer 
instead of sending what you write for pray accept the sum that i
tender what will seven guineas do and i will find a way to send you
also any of my clothes and linen for present supply i beg my dear
clarissa that you will not put your anna howe upon a footing with
lovelace in refusing to accept of my offer if you do not oblige me i
shall be apt to think you rather incline to be obliged to him than to
favour me and if i find this i shall not know how to reconcile it with
your delicacy in other respects 

pray inform me of every thing that passes between you and him my cares
for you however needless from your own prudence make me wish you to
continue to be every minute if any thing occur that you would tell me
of if i were present fail not to put it down in writing although
from your natural diffidence it should not appear to you altogether so
worthy of your pen or my knowing a stander-by may see more of the game
than one that plays great consequences like great folks generally owe
their greatness to small causes and little incidents 

upon the whole i do not now think it is in your power to dismiss him
when you please i apprized you beforehand that it would not i
repeat therefore that were i you i would at least seem to place
some confidence in him so long as he is decent you may very visibly
observable to such delicacy as yours must be that behaviour in him 
which will make him unworthy of some confidence 

your relations according to what old antony says to my mother and she
to me by way of threatening that you will not gain your supposed ends
upon them by your flight seem to expect that you will throw yourself
into lady betty's protection and that she will offer to mediate
for you and they vow that they will never hearken to any terms of
accommodation that shall come from that quarter for i dare aver that
your brother and sister will not let them cool at least till their
uncles have made such dispositions and perhaps your father too as they
would have them make 

as this letter will apprize you of an alteration in the place to which
you must direct your next i send it by a friend of mr hickman who may
be depended upon he has business in the neighbourhood of mrs sorlings 
and he knows her he will return to mr hickman this night and bring
back any letter you shall have ready to send or can get ready it is
moon-light he'll not mind waiting for you i choose not to send by any
of mr hickman's servants at present however every hour is now 
or may be important and may make an alteration in your resolutions
necessary 

i hear at this instant my mother calling about her and putting every
body into motion she will soon i suppose make me and my employment
the subjects of her inquiry 

adieu my dear may heaven preserve you and restore you with honour as
unsullied as your mind to

your ever affectionate anna howe 




letter ix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday afternoon april 13 


i am infinitely concerned my ever dear and ever kind friend that i am
the sad occasion of the displeasure between your mother and you how
many persons have i made unhappy 

had i not to console myself that my error is not owing to wicked
precipitation i should be the most miserable of all creatures as it
is i am enough punished in the loss of my character more valuable
to me than my life and in the cruel doubts and perplexities which 
conflicting with my hopes and each getting the victory by turns harrow
up my soul between them 

i think however that you should obey your mother and decline a
correspondence with me at least for the present take care how you
fall into my error for that begun with carrying on a prohibited
correspondence a correspondence which i thought it in my power to
discontinue at pleasure my talent is scribbling and i the readier fell
into this freedom as i found delight in writing having motives too 
which i thought laudable and at one time the permission of all my
friends to write to him 


 see vol i letter iii 


yet as to this correspondence what hurt could arise from it if your
mother could be prevailed upon to permit it to be continued so much
prudence and discretion as you have and you in writing to me lying
under no temptation of following so bad an example as i have set my
letters too occasionally filled with self-accusation 

i thank you my dear most cordially i thank you for your kind offers 
you may be assured that i will sooner be beholden to you than to any
body living to mr lovelace the last do not therefore think that
by declining your favours i have an intention to lay myself under
obligations to him 

i am willing to hope notwithstanding what you write that my friends
will send me my little money together with my clothes they are too
considerate some of them at least to permit that i should be put to
such low difficulties perhaps they will not be in haste to oblige me 
but if not i cannot yet want i believe you think i must not dispute
with mr lovelace the expenses of the road and lodgings till i can get
a fixed abode but i hope soon to put an end even to those small sort of
obligations 

small hopes indeed of a reconciliation from your account of my uncle's
visit to your mother in order to set her against an almost friendless
creature whom once he loved but is it not my duty to try for it 
ought i to widen my error by obstinacy and resentment because of their
resentment which must appear reasonable to them as they suppose my
flight premeditated and as they are made to believe that i am capable
of triumphing in it and over them with the man they hate when i have
done all in my power to restore myself to their favour i shall have the
less to reproach myself with 

these considerations make me waver about following your advice in
relation to marriage and the rather as he is so full of complaisance
with regard to my former conditions which he calls my injunctions 
nor can i now that my friends as you inform me have so strenuously
declared against accepting of the mediation of the ladies of mr 
lovelace's family put myself into their protection unless i am
resolved to give up all hopes of a reconciliation with my own 

yet if any happy introduction could be thought of to effect this
desirable purpose how shall terms be proposed to my father while
this man is with me or near me on the other hand should they in his
absence get me back by force and this you are of opinion they would
attempt to do but in fear of him how will their severest acts of
compulsion be justified by my flight from them mean while to what
censures as you remind me do i expose myself while he and i are
together and unmarried yet  can i with patience ask the question   is
it in my power o my dear miss howe and am i so reduced as that to
save the poor remains of my reputation in the world's eye i must watch
the gracious motion from this man's lips 

were my cousin morden in england all might still perhaps be determined
happily 

if no other mediation than this can be procured to set on foot the
wished-for reconciliation and if my situation with mr lovelace alter
not in the interim i must endeavour to keep myself in a state of
independence till he arrive that i may be at liberty to govern myself
by his advice and direction 

i will acquaint you as you desire with all that passes between
mr lovelace and me hitherto i have not discovered any thing in his
behaviour that is very exceptionable yet i cannot say that i think
the respect he shews me an easy unrestrained and natural respect 
although i can hardly tell where the fault is 

but he has doubtless an arrogant and encroaching spirit nor is he
so polite as his education and other advantages might have made one
expect him to be he seems in short to be one who has always had too
much of his own will to study to accommodate himself to that of others 

as to the placing of some confidence in him i shall be as ready to take
your advice in this particular as in all others and as he will be
to deserve it but tricked away as i was by him not only against my
judgment but my inclination can he or any body expect that i should
immediately treat him with complaisance as if i acknowledged obligation
to him for carrying me away if i did must he not either think me a
vile dissembler before he gained that point or afterwards 

indeed indeed my dear i could tear my hair on reconsidering what you
write as to the probability that the dreaded wednesday was more dreaded
than it needed to be to think that i should be thus tricked by this
man and that in all likelihood through his vile agent joseph leman 
so premeditated and elaborate a wickedness as it must be must i
not with such a man be wanting to myself if i were not jealous and
vigilant yet what a life to live for a spirit so open and naturally
so unsuspicious as mine 

i am obliged to mr hickman for the assistance he is so kindly ready to
give to our correspondence he is so little likely to make to himself an
additional merit with the daughter upon it that i shall be very sorry 
if he risk any thing with the mother by it 

i am now in a state of obligation so must rest satisfied with whatever
i cannot help whom have i the power once so precious to me of
obliging what i mean my dear is that i ought perhaps to
expect that my influences over you are weakened by my indiscretion 
nevertheless i will not if i can help it desert myself nor give up
the privilege you used to allow me of telling you what i think of such
parts of your conduct as i may not approve 

you must permit me therefore severe as your mother is against an
undesigning offender to say that i think your liveliness to her
inexcusable to pass over for this time what nevertheless concerns me
not a little the free treatment you almost indiscriminately give to my
relations 

if you will not for your duty's sake forbear your tauntings and
impatience let me beseech you that you will for mine since
otherwise your mother may apprehend that my example like a leaven is
working itself into the mind of her beloved daughter and may not such
an apprehension give her an irreconcilable displeasure against me 

i enclose the copy of my letter to my sister which you are desirous to
see you will observe that although i have not demanded my estate in
form and of my trustees yet that i have hinted at leave to retire to
it how joyfully would i keep my word if they would accept of the offer
i renew it was not proper i believe you will think on many accounts 
to own that i was carried off against my inclination i am my dearest
friend 

your ever obliged and affectionate cl harlowe 




letter x

to miss arabella harlowe  enclosed to miss howe in the preceding   st 
alban's apr 11 


my dear sister 

i have i confess been guilty of an action which carries with it a rash
and undutiful appearance and i should have thought it an inexcusable
one had i been used with less severity than i have been of late and
had i not had too great reason to apprehend that i was to be made a
sacrifice to a man i could not bear to think of but what is done is
done perhaps i could wish it had not and that i had trusted to the
relenting of my dear and honourable parents yet this from no other
motives but those of duty to them to whom i am ready to return if
i may not be permitted to retire to the grove on conditions which i
before offered to comply with 

nor shall i be in any sort of dependence upon the person by whose means
i have taken this truly-reluctant step inconsistent with any reasonable
engagement i shall enter into if i am not further precipitated let me
not have it to say now at this important crisis that i have a sister 
but not a friend in that sister my reputation dearer to me than life 
 whatever you may imagine from the step i have taken is suffering a
little lenity will even yet in a great measure restore it and make
that pass for a temporary misunderstanding only which otherwise will be
a stain as durable as life upon a creature who has already been treated
with great unkindness to use no harsher a word 

for your own sake therefore for my brother's sake by whom i must say 
i have been thus precipitated and for all the family's sake aggravate
not my fault if on recollecting every thing you think it one nor by
widening the unhappy difference expose a sister for ever prays

your affectionate cl harlowe 

i shall take it for a very great favour to have my clothes directly sent
me together with fifty guineas which you will find in my escritoire
 of which i enclose the key as also of the divinity and miscellany
classes of my little library and if it be thought fit my
jewels directed for me to be left till called for at mr osgood's 
near soho-square 




letter xi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


 mr lovelace in continuation of his last letter no vii 
 gives an account to his friend pretty much to the same
 effect with the lady's of all that passed between them at
 the inns in the journey and till their fixing at mrs 
 sorling's to avoid repetition those passages in his
 narrative are extracted which will serve to embellish
 her's to open his views or to display the humourous talent
 he was noted for 

 at their alighting at the inn at st alban's on monday
 night thus he writes 


the people who came about us as we alighted seemed by their jaw-fallen
faces and goggling eyes to wonder at beholding a charming young lady 
majesty in her air and aspect so composedly dressed yet with features
so discomposed come off a journey which made the cattle smoke and the
servants sweat i read their curiosity in their faces and my beloved's
uneasiness in her's she cast a conscious glance as she alighted upon
her habit which was no habit and repulsively as i may say quitting
my assisting hand hurried into the house 

ovid was not a greater master of metamorphoses than thy friend to the
mistress of the house i instantly changed her into a sister brought off
by surprise from a near relation's where she had wintered to prevent
her marrying a confounded rake  i love always to go as near the truth
as i can   whom her father and mother her elder sister and all her
loving uncles aunts and cousins abhorred this accounted for my
charmer's expected sullens for her displeasure when she was to join me
again were it to hold for her unsuitable dress upon the road and 
at the same time gave her a proper and seasonable assurance of my
honourable views 


upon the debate between the lady and him and particularly upon that
part where she upbraids him with putting a young creature upon making a
 sacrifice of her duty and conscience he write 


all these and still more mortifying things she said 

i heard her in silence but when it came to my turn i pleaded i
argued i answered her as well as i could and when humility would
not do i raised my voice and suffered my eyes to sparkle with anger 
hoping to take advantage of that sweet cowardice which is so amiable in
the sex and to which my victory over this proud beauty is principally
owing 

she was not intimidated however and was going to rise upon me in her
temper and would have broken in upon my defence but when a man talks
to a woman upon such subjects let her be ever so much in alt tis
strange if he cannot throw out a tub to the whale that is to say if
he cannot divert her from resenting one bold thing by uttering two or
three full as bold but for which more favourable interpretations will
lie 


 to that part where she tells him of the difficulty she made
 to correspond with him at first thus he writes 


very true my precious and innumerable have been the difficulties
thou hast made me struggle with but one day thou mayest wish that thou
hadst spared this boast as well as those other pretty haughtinesses 
that thou didst not reject solmes for my sake that my glory if i
valued myself upon carrying thee off was thy shame that i have more
merit with myself than with thee or any body else  what a coxcomb she
makes me jack   that thou wishest thyself in thy father's house again 
whatever were to be the consequence  if i forgive thee charmer 
for these hints for these reflections for these wishes for these
contempts i am not the lovelace i have been reputed to be and that thy
treatment of me shews that thou thinkest i am 

in short her whole air throughout this debate expressed a majestic kind
of indignation which implied a believed superiority of talents over the
person to whom she spoke 

thou hast heard me often expatiate upon the pitiful figure a man must
make whose wife has or believes she has more sense than himself a
thousand reasons could i give why i ought not to think of marrying miss
clarissa harlowe at least till i can be sure that she loves me with
the preference i must expect from a wife 

i begin to stagger in my resolutions ever averse as i was to the
hymeneal shackles how easily will prejudices recur heaven give me the
heart to be honest to my clarissa there's a prayer jack if i should
not be heard what a sad thing would that be for the most admirable of
women yet as i do no often trouble heaven with my prayers who knows
but this may be granted 

but there lie before me such charming difficulties such scenery for
intrigue for stratagem for enterprize what a horrible thing that my
talents point all that way when i know what is honourable and just 
and would almost wish to be honest almost i say for such a varlet am
i that i cannot altogether wish it for the soul of me such a triumph
over the whole sex if i can subdue this lady my maiden vow as i may
call it for did not the sex begin with me and does this lady spare
me thinkest thou jack that i should have spared my rosebud had i
been set at defiance thus her grandmother besought me at first to
spare her rosebud and when a girl is put or puts herself into a
man's power what can he wish for further while i always considered
opposition and resistance as a challenge to do my worst 


 see vol i letter xxxiv 


why why will the dear creature take such pains to appear all ice to
me why will she by her pride awaken mine hast thou not seen in
the above how contemptibly she treats me what have i not suffered
for her and even from her ought i to bear being told that she will
despise me if i value myself above that odious solmes 

then she cuts me short in all my ardours to vow fidelity is by a
cursed turn upon me to shew that there is reason in my own opinion 
for doubt of it the very same reflection upon me once before 


 see vol ii letter xiii 


in my power or out of my power all one to this lady so belford my
poor vows are crammed down my throat before they can well rise to my
lips and what can a lover say to his mistress if she will neither let
him lie nor swear 

one little piece of artifice i had recourse to when she pushed so hard
for me to leave her i made a request to her upon a condition she could
not refuse and pretended as much gratitude upon her granting it as if
it were a favour of the last consequence 

and what was this but to promise what she had before promised never
to marry any other man while i am living and single unless i should
give her cause for high disgust against me  this you know was
promising nothing because she could be offended at any time and was to
be the sole judge of the offence but it shewed her how reasonable and
just my expectations were and that i was no encroacher 

she consented and asked what security i expected her word only 

she gave me her word but i besought her excuse for sealing it and in
the same moment since to have waited for consent would have been asking
for a denial saluted her and believe me or not but as i hope to
live it was the first time i had the courage to touch her charming lips
with mine and this i tell thee belford that that single pressure as
modestly put too as if i were as much a virgin as herself that she
might not be afraid of me another time delighted me more than ever i
was delighted by the ultimatum with any other woman so precious do
awe reverence and apprehended prohibition make a favour 

and now belford i am only afraid that i shall be too cunning for she
does not at present talk enough for me i hardly know what to make of
the dear creature yet 

i topt the brother's part on monday night before the landlady at st 
alban's asking my sister's pardon for carrying her off so unprepared
for a journey prated of the joy my father and mother and all
our friends would have in receiving her and this with so many
circumstances that i perceived by a look she gave me that went
through my very veins that i had gone too far i apologized for it
indeed when alone but could not penetrate for the soul of me whether i
made the matter better or worse by it 

but i am of too frank a nature my success and the joy i have because
of the jewel i am half in possession of has not only unlocked my bosom 
but left the door quite open 

this is a confounded sly sex would she but speak out as i do but i
must learn reserves of her 

she must needs be unprovided of money but has too much pride to accept
of any from me i would have had her go to town  to town if possible 
must i get her to consent to go  in order to provide herself with
the richest of silks which that can afford but neither is this to be
assented to and yet as my intelligencer acquaints me her implacable
relations are resolved to distress her all they can 

these wretches have been most gloriously raving ever since her flight 
and still thank heaven continue to rave and will i hope for a
twelvemonth to come now at last it is my day 

bitterly do they regret that they permitted her poultry-visits and
garden-walks which gave her the opportunity to effect an escape which
they suppose preconcerted for as to her dining in the ivy-bower they
had a cunning design to answer upon her in that permission as betty
told joseph her lover 


 vol ii letter xlvii paragr 37 38 


they lost they say and excellent pretence for confining her more
closely on my threatening to rescue her if they offered to carry her
against her will to old antony's moated house for this as i told thee
at the hart and as i once hinted to the dear creature herself they
had it in deliberation to do apprehending that i might attempt to
carry her off either with or without her consent on some one of those
connived-at excursions 


 ibid let xxxvi and let xxxix par i 
 ibid let xxxvi par 4 see also let xv par 3 


but here my honest joseph who gave me the information was of admirable
service to me i had taught him to make the harlowes believe that i was
as communicative to my servants as their stupid james was to joseph 
joseph as they supposed by tampering with will got all my secrets 
and was acquainted with all my motions and having also undertaken to
watch all those of his young lady the wise family were secure and
so was my beloved and so was i 


 ibid letter xlvii par 6 and 39 
 this will be farther explained in letter xxi of this volume 
see vol i letters xxxi and xxxiv 


i once had it in my head and i hinted it to thee in a former in case
such a step should be necessary to attempt to carry her off by surprise
from the wood-house as it is remote from the dwelling-house this 
had i attempted i should have certainly effected by the help of the
confraternity and it would have been an action worthy of us all but
joseph's conscience as he called it stood in my way for he thought it
must have been known to be done by his connivance i could i dare say 
have overcome this scruple as easily as i did many of the others had
i not depended at one time upon her meeting me at midnight or late hour
 and if she had she never would have gone back  at other times 
upon the cunning family's doing my work for me equally against their
knowledge or their wills 


 see vol i letter xxxv 


for well i knew that james and arabella were determined never to leave
off their foolish trials and provocations till by tiring her out they
had either made her solmes's wife or guilty of some such rashness as
should throw her for ever out of the favour of both her uncles though
they had too much malice in their heads to intend service to me by their
persecutions of her 




letter xii

mr lovelace to john belford esq  in continuation  


i obliged the dear creature highly i could perceive by bringing mrs 
greme to attend her and to suffer that good woman's recommendation of
lodgings to take place on her refusal to go to the lawn 

she must believe all my views to be honourable when i had provided for
her no particular lodgings leaving it to her choice whether she would
go to m hall to the lawn to london or to either of the dowagers of
my family 

she was visibly pleased with my motion of putting mrs greme into the
chaise with her and riding on horseback myself 

some people would have been apprehensive of what might pass between
her and mrs greme but as all my relations either know or believe the
justice of my intentions by her i was in no pain on that account 
and the less as i have always been above hypocrisy or wishing to be
thought better than i am and indeed what occasion has a man to be an
hypocrite who has hitherto found his views upon the sex better answered
for his being known to be a rake why even my beloved here denied not
to correspond with me though her friends had taught her to think me a
libertine who then would be trying a new and worse character 

and then mrs greme is a pious matron and would not have been biased
against truth on any consideration she used formerly while there were
any hopes of my reformation to pray for me she hardly continues the
good custom i doubt for her worthy lord makes no scruple occasionally
to rave against me to man woman and child as they come in his way 
he is very undutiful as thou knowest surely i may say so since all
duties are reciprocal but for mrs greme poor woman when my lord
has the gout and is at the lawn and the chaplain not to be found she
prays by him or reads a chapter to him in the bible or some other good
book 

was it not therefore right to introduce such a good sort of woman to
the dear creature and to leave them without reserve to their own
talk and very busy in talk i saw they were as they rode and felt it
too for most charmingly glowed my cheeks 

i hope i shall be honest i once more say but as we frail mortals are
not our own masters at all times i must endeavour to keep the dear
creature unapprehensive until i can get her to our acquaintance's in
london or to some other safe place there should i in the interim 
give her the least room for suspicion or offer to restrain her she
can make her appeals to strangers and call the country in upon me and 
perhaps throw herself upon her relations on their own terms and were i
now to lose her how unworthy should i be to be the prince and leader
of such a confraternity as ours how unable to look up among men or to
shew my face among women 

as things at present stand she dare not own that she went off against
her own consent and i have taken care to make all the implacables
believe that she escaped with it 

she has received an answer from miss howe to the letter written to her
from st alban's 


 see vol ii letter xlviii 


whatever are the contents i know not but she was drowned in tears on
the perusal of it and i am the sufferer 

miss howe is a charming creature too but confoundedly smart and
spiritful i am a good deal afraid of her her mother can hardly keep
her in i must continue to play off old antony by my honest joseph 
upon that mother in order to manage that daughter and oblige my
beloved to an absolute dependence upon myself 


 see vol i letter xxxi 


mrs howe is impatient of contradiction so is miss a young lady who is
sensible that she has all the materials requisites herself to be under
maternal controul fine ground for a man of intrigue to build upon a
mother over-notable a daughter over-sensible and their hickman who
is over-neither but merely a passive 

only that i have an object still more desirable 

yet how unhappy that these two young ladies lived so near each other 
and are so well acquainted else how charmingly might i have managed
them both 

but one man cannot have every woman worth having pity though when the
man is such a very clever fellow 




letter xiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq  in continuation  


never was there such a pair of scribbling lovers as we yet perhaps
whom it so much concerns to keep from each other what each writes she
won't have any thing else to do i would if she'd let me i am not
reformed enough for a husband patience is a virtue lord m says slow
and sure is another of his sentences if i had not a great deal of that
virtue i should not have waited the harlowes own time of ripening into
execution my plots upon themselves and upon their goddess daughter 

my beloved has been writing to her saucy friend i believe all that has
befallen her and what has passed between us hitherto she will possibly
have fine subjects for her pen if she be as minute as i am 

i would not be so barbarous as to permit old antony to set mrs howe
against her did i not dread the consequences of the correspondence
between the two young ladies so lively the one so vigilant so prudent
both who would not wish to outwit such girls and to be able to twirl
them round his finger 

my charmer has written to her sister for her clothes for some gold and
for some of her books what books can tell her more than she knows but
i can so she had better study me 

she may write she must be obliged to me at last with all her pride 
miss howe indeed will be ready enough to supply her but i question 
whether she can do it without her mother who is as covetous as the
grave and my agent's agent old antony has already given the mother a
hint which will make her jealous of pecuniaries 

besides if miss howe has money by her i can put her mother upon
borrowing it of her nor blame me jack for contrivances that have
their foundation in generosity thou knowest my spirit and that i
should be proud to lay an obligation upon my charmer to the amount of
half nay to the whole of my estate lord m has more for me than i
can ever wish for my predominant passion is girl not gold nor value i
this but as it helps me to that and gives me independence 

i was forced to put it into the sweet novice's head as well for my sake
as for hers lest we should be traceable by her direction whither to
direct the sending of her clothes if they incline to do her that small
piece of justice 

if they do i shall begin to dread a reconciliation and must be forced
to muse for a contrivance or two to prevent it and to avoid mischief 
for that as i have told honest joseph leman is a great point with me 

thou wilt think me a sad fellow i doubt but are not all rakes sad
fellows and art not thou to thy little power as bad as any if thou
dost all that's in thy head and in thy heart to do thou art worse than
i for i do not i assure you 

i proposed and she consented that her clothes or whatever else her
relations should think fit to send her should be directed to thy cousin
osgood's let a special messenger at my charge bring me any letter or
portable parcel that shall come if not portable give me notice of it 
but thou'lt have no trouble of this sort from her relations i dare be
sworn and in this assurance i will leave them i think to act upon
their own heads a man would have no more to answer for than needs must 

but one thing while i think of it which is of great importance to be
attended to you must hereafter write to me in character as i shall do
to you it would be a confounded thing to be blown up by a train of
my own laying and who knows what opportunities a man in love may have
against himself in changing a coat or waistcoat something might be
forgotten i once suffered that way then for the sex's curiosity it
is but remembering in order to guard against it that the name of their
common mother was eve 

another thing remember i have changed my name changed it without an
act of parliament robert huntingford' it is now continue esquire 
it is a respectable addition although every sorry fellow assumes it 
almost to the banishment of the usual traveling one of captain to be
left till called for at the post-house at hertford 

upon naming thee she asked thy character i gave thee a better than
thou deservest in order to do credit to myself yet i told her that
thou wert an awkward fellow and this to do credit to thee that she may
not if ever she be to see thee expect a cleverer man than she'll find 
yet thy apparent awkwardness befriends thee not a little for wert thou
a sightly mortal people would discover nothing extraordinary in
thee when they conversed with thee whereas seeing a bear they are
surprised to find in thee any thing that is like a man felicitate
thyself then upon thy defects which are evidently thy principal
perfections and which occasion thee a distinction which otherwise thou
wouldst never have 

the lodgings we are in at present are not convenient i was so delicate
as to find fault with them as communicating with each other because
i knew she would and told her that were i sure she was safe from
pursuit i would leave her in them since such was her earnest desire
and expectation and go to london 

she must be an infidel against all reason and appearances if i do not
banish even the shadow of mistrust from her heart 

here are two young likely girls daughters of the widow sorlings that's
the name of our landlady 

i have only at present admired them in their dairy-works how greedily
do the sex swallow praise did i not once in the streets of london 
see a well-dressed handsome girl laugh bridle and visibly enjoy the
praises of a sooty dog a chimney-sweeper who with his empty sack
across his shoulder after giving her the way stopt and held up his
brush and shovel in admiration of her egad girl thought i i
despise thee as lovelace but were i the chimney-sweeper and could only
contrive to get into thy presence my life to thy virtue i would have
thee 

so pleased was i with the young sorlings for the elegance of her works 
that i kissed her and she made me a courtesy for my condescension and
blushed and seemed sensible all over encouraging yet innocently she
adjusted her handkerchief and looked towards the door as much as to
say she would not tell were i to kiss her again 

her eldest sister popt upon her the conscious girl blushed again and
looked so confounded that i made an excuse for her which gratified
both mrs betty said i i have been so much pleased with the neatness
of your dairy-works that i could not help saluting your sister you
have your share of merit in them i am sure give me leave 

good souls i like them both she courtesied too how i love a
grateful temper o that my clarissa were but half so acknowledging 

i think i must get one of them to attend my charmer when she
removes the mother seems to be a notable woman she had not best 
however be too notable since were she by suspicion to give me a face
of difficulty to the matter it would prepare me for a trial with one or
both the daughters 

allow me a little rhodamantade jack but really and truly my heart is
fixed i can think of no creature breathing of the sex but my gloriana 




letter xiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq  in continuation  


this is wednesday the day that i was to have lost my charmer for ever
to the hideous solmes with what high satisfaction and heart's-ease can
i now sit down and triumph over my men in straw at harlowe-place yet
tis perhaps best for them that she got off as she did who knows what
consequences might have followed upon my attending her in or if she
had not met me upon my projected visit followed by my myrmidons 

but had i even gone in with her unaccompanied i think i had but little
reason for apprehension for well thou knowest that the tame spirits
which value themselves upon reputation and are held within the skirts
of the law by political considerations only may be compared to an
infectious spider which will run into his hole the moment one of his
threads is touched by a finger that can crush him leaving all his toils
defenceless and to be brushed down at the will of the potent invader 
while a silly fly that has neither courage nor strength to resist 
no sooner gives notice by its buz and its struggles of its being
entangled but out steps the self-circumscribed tyrant winds round and
round the poor insect till he covers it with his bowel-spun toils and
when so fully secured that it can neither move leg nor wing suspends
it as if for a spectacle to be exulted over then stalking to the door
of his cell turns about glotes over it at a distance and sometimes
advancing sometimes retiring preys at leisure upon its vitals 

but now i think of it will not this comparison do as well for
the entangled girls as for the tame spirits better o' my
conscience tis but comparing the spider to us brave fellows and it
quadrates 

whatever our hearts are in our heads will follow begin with spiders 
with flies with what we will girl is the centre of gravity and we all
naturally tend to it 

nevertheless to recur i cannot but observe that these tame spirits
stand a poor chance in a fairly offensive war with such of us mad
fellows as are above all law and scorn to sculk behind the hypocritical
screen of reputation 

thou knowest that i never scruple to throw myself amongst numbers of
adversaries the more the safer one or two no fear will take the part
of a single adventurer if not intentionally in fact holding him in 
while others hold in the principal antagonist to the augmentation of
their mutual prowess till both are prevailed upon to compromise or
one to be absent so that upon the whole the law-breakers have the
advantage of the law-keepers all the world over at least for a time 
and till they have run to the end of their race add to this in the
question between me and the harlowes that the whole family of them must
know that they have injured me must therefore be afraid of me did they
not at their own church cluster together like bees when they saw me
enter it nor knew they which should venture out first when the service
was over 

james indeed was not there if he had he would perhaps have
endeavoured to look valiant but there is a sort of valour in the face 
which shews fear in the heart just such a face would james harlowe's
have been had i made them a visit 

when i have had such a face and such a heart as i have described to deal
with i have been all calm and serene and left it to the friends of the
blusterer as i have done to the harlowes to do my work for me 

i am about mustering up in my memory all that i have ever done that
has been thought praise-worthy or but barely tolerable i am afraid
thou canst not help me to many remembrances of this sort because i
never was so bad as since i have known thee 

have i not had it in my heart to do some good that thou canst not remind
me of study for me jack i have recollected some instances which i
think will tell in but see if thou canst not help me to some which i
may have forgot 

this i may venture to say that the principal blot in my escutcheon is
owing to these girls these confounded girls but for them i could go
to church with a good conscience but when i do there they are every
where does satan spread his snares for me but how i think of it what
if our governor should appoint churches for the women only and others
for the men full as proper i think for the promoting of true
piety in both  much better than the synagogue-lattices   as separate
boarding-schools for their education 

there are already male and female dedications of churches 

st swithin's st stephen's st thomas's st george's and so forth 
might be appropriated to the men and santa catharina's santa anna's 
santa maria's santa margaretta's for the women 

yet were it so and life to be the forfeiture of being found at the
female churches i believe that i like a second clodius should change
my dress to come at my portia or pompeia though one the daughter of a
cato the other the wife of a caesar 

but how i excurse yet thou usedst to say thou likedst my excursions 
if thou dost thou'lt have enow of them for i never had a subject i
so much adored and with which i shall probably be compelled to have so
much patience before i strike the blow if the blow i do strike 

but let me call myself back to my recordation-subject thou needest
not remind me of my rosebud i have her in my head and moreover have
contrived to give my fair-one an hint of that affair by the agency of
honest joseph leman although i have not reaped the hoped-for credit of
her acknowledgement 


 see vol ii letter xxvii 


that's the devil and it was always my hard fate every thing i do that
is good is but as i ought every thing of a contrary nature is brought
into the most glaring light against me is this fair ought not a
balance to be struck and the credit carried to my account yet i must
own too that i half grudge johnny this blooming maiden for in truth 
i think a fine woman too rich a jewel to hang about a poor man's neck 

surely jack if i am guilty of a fault in my universal adorations of
the sex the women in general ought to love me the better for it 

and so they do i thank them heartily except here and there a covetous
little rogue comes cross me who under the pretence of loving virtue
for its own sake wants to have me all to herself 

i have rambled enough 

adieu for the present 




letter xv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday night april 13 


i always loved writing and my unhappy situation gives me now enough of
it and you i fear too much i have had another very warm debate with
mr lovelace it brought on the subject which you advised me not to
decline when it was handsomely offered and i want to have either your
acquittal or blame for having suffered it to go off without effect 

the impatient wretch sent up to me several times while i was writing my
last to you to desire my company yet his business nothing particular 
only to hear him talk the man seems pleased with his own volubility 
and whenever he has collected together abundance of smooth things he
wants me to find an ear for them yet he need not for i don't often
gratify him either with giving him the praise for his verboseness or
shewing the pleasure in it that he would be fond of 

when i had finished the letter and given it to mr hickman's friend i
was going up again and had got up half a dozen stairs when he besought
be to stop and hear what he had to say 

nothing as i said to any new purpose had he to offer but
complainings and those in a manner and with an air as i thought that
bordered upon insolence he could not live he told me unless he had
more of my company and of my indulgence too that i had yet given him 

hereupon i stept down and into the parlour not a little out of humour
with him and the more as he has very quietly taken up his quarters
here without talking of removing as he had promised 

we began instantly our angry conference he provoked me and i repeated
several of the plainest things i had said in our former conversations 
and particularly told him that i was every hour more and more
dissatisfied with myself and with him that he was not a man who in
my opinion improved upon acquaintance and that i should not be easy
till he had left me to myself 

he might be surprised at my warmth perhaps but really the man looked
so like a simpleton hesitating and having nothing to say for himself 
or that should excuse the peremptoriness of his demand upon me when he
knew i had been writing a letter which a gentleman waited for that i
flung from him declaring that i would be mistress of my own time and
of my own actions and not to be called to account for either 

he was very uneasy till he could again be admitted into my company and
when i was obliged to see him which was sooner than i liked never did
the man put on a more humble and respectful demeanor 

he told me that he had upon this occasion been entering into
himself and had found a great deal of reason to blame himself for an
impertinency and inconsideration which although he meant nothing by
it must be very disagreeable to one of my delicacy that having always
aimed at a manly sincerity and openness of heart he had not till now
discovered that both were very consistent with that true politeness 
which he feared he had too much disregarded while he sought to avoid
the contrary extreme knowing that in me he had to deal with a lady 
who despised an hypocrite and who was above all flattery but from this
time forth i should find such an alteration in his whole behaviour as
might be expected from a man who knew himself to be honoured with the
presence and conversation of a person who had the most delicate mind in
the world that was his flourish 

i said that he might perhaps expect congratulation upon the discovery
he had just now made to wit that true politeness and sincerity were
reconcilable but that i who had by a perverse fate been thrown into
his company had abundant reason to regret that he had not sooner found
this out since i believed very few men of birth and education were
strangers to it 

he knew not neither he said that he had so badly behaved himself as
to deserve so very severe a rebuke 

perhaps not i replied but he might if so make another discovery from
what i had said which might be to my own disadvantage since if he
had so much reason to be satisfied with himself he would see what an
ungenerous person he spoke to who when he seemed to give himself airs
of humility which perhaps he thought beneath him to assume had not
the civility to make him a compliment upon them but was ready to take
him at his word 

he had long with infinite pleasure the pretended flattery-hater said 
admired my superior talents and a wisdom in so young a lady perfectly
suprising 

let me madam said he stand ever so low in your opinion i shall
believe all you say to be just and that i have nothing to do but to
govern myself for the future by your example and by the standard you
shall be pleased to give me 

i know better sir replied i than to value myself upon your volubility
of speech as you pretend to pay so preferable a regard to sincerity 
you shall confine yourself to the strict rules of truth when you speak
of me to myself and then although you shall be so kind as to imagine
that you have reason to make me a compliment you will have much more
to pride yourself in those arts which have made so extraordinary a young
creature so great a fool 

really my dear the man deserves not politer treatment and then has
he not made a fool an egregious fool of me i am afraid he himself
thinks he has 

i am surprised i am amazed madam returned he at so strange a turn
upon me i am very unhappy that nothing i can do or say will give
you a good opinion of me would to heaven that i knew what i can do to
obtain the honour of your confidence 

i told him that i desired his absence of all things i saw not 
i said that my friends thought it worth their while to give me
disturbance therefore if he would set out for london or berkshire or
whither he pleased it would be most agreeable to me and most reputable
too 

he would do so he said he intended to do so the moment i was in a
place to my liking in a place convenient for me 

this sir will be so said i when you are not here to break in upon
me and make the apartments inconvenient 

he did not think this place safe he replied and as i intended not to
stay here he had not been so solicitous as otherwise he should have
been to enjoin privacy to his servants nor to mrs greme at her
leaving me that there were two or three gentlemen at the neighbourhood 
he said with whose servants his gossiping fellows had scraped
acquaintance so that he could not think of leaving me here unguarded
and unattended but fix upon any place in england where i could be
out of danger and he would go to the furthermost part of the king's
dominions if by doing so he could make me easy 

i told him plainly that i should never be in humour with myself for
meeting him nor with him for seducing me away that my regrets
increased instead of diminished that my reputation was wounded that
nothing i could do would now retrieve it and that he must not wonder 
if i every hour grew more and more uneasy both with myself and him that
upon the whole i was willing to take care of myself and when he had
left me i should best know what to resolve upon and whither to go 

he wished he said he were at liberty without giving me offence or
being thought to intend to infringe the articles i had stipulated and
insisted upon to make one humble proposal to me but the sacred regard
he was determined to pay to all my injunctions reluctantly as i had on
monday last put it into his power to serve me would not permit him to
make it unless i would promise to excuse him if i did not approve of
it 

i asked in some confusion what he would say 

he prefaced and paraded on and then out came with great diffidence 
and many apologies and a bashfulness which sat very awkwardly upon him 
a proposal of speedy solemnization which he said would put all right 
and make my first three or four months which otherwise must be passed
in obscurity and apprehension a round of visits and visitings to and
from all his relations to miss howe to whom i pleased and would pave
the way to the reconciliation i had so much at heart 

your advice had great weight with me just then as well as his reasons 
and the consideration of my unhappy situation but what could i say i
wanted somebody to speak for me 

the man saw i was not angry at his motion i only blushed and that i am
sure i did up to the ears and looked silly and like a fool 

he wants not courage would he have had me catch at his first at his
very first word i was silent too and do not the bold sex take silence
for a mark of a favour then so lately in my father's house having
also declared to him in my letters before i had your advice that
i would not think of marriage till he had passed through a state of
probation as i may call it how was it possible i could encourage with
very ready signs of approbation such an early proposal especially so
soon after the free treatment he had provoked from me if i were to die 
i could not 

he looked at me with great confidence as if notwithstanding his
contradictory bashfulness he would look me through while my eye
but now-and-then could glance at him he begged my pardon with great
humility he was afraid i would think he deserved no other answer but
that of a contemptuous silence true love was fearful of offending 
 take care mr lovelace thought i how your's is tried by that
rule  indeed so sacred a regard  foolish man   would he have to all my
declarations made before i honoured him 

i would hear him no further but withdrew in a confusion too visible 
and left him to make his nonsensical flourishes to himself 

i will only add that if he really wishes for a speedy solemnization 
he never could have had a luckier time to press for my consent to it 
but he let it go off and indignation has taken place of it and now it
shall be a point with me to get him at a distance from me 

i am my dearest friend your ever faithful and obliged cl h 




letter xvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq tuesday apr 13 


why jack thou needest not make such a wonderment as the girls say if
i should have taken large strides already towards reformation for dost
thou not see that while i have been so assiduously night and day 
pursuing this single charmer i have infinitely less to answer for 
than otherwise i should have had let me see how many days and
nights forty i believe after open trenches spent in the sap only 
and never a mine sprung yet 

by a moderate computation a dozen kites might have fallen while i have
been only trying to ensnare this single lark nor yet do i see when
i shall be able to bring her to my lure more innocent days yet 
therefore but reformation for my stalking-horse i hope will be a
sure though a slow method to effect all my purposes 

then jack thou wilt have a merit too in engaging my pen since thy
time would be otherwise worse employed and after all who knows but by
creating new habits at the expense of the old a real reformation may
be brought about i have promised it and i believe there is a pleasure
to be found in being good reversing that of nat lee's madman 

 which none but good men know 

by all this seest thou not how greatly preferable it is on twenty
accounts to pursue a difficult rather than an easy chace i have a
desire to inculcate this pleasure upon thee and to teach thee to fly at
nobler game than daws crows and widgeons i have a mind to shew thee
from time to time in the course of the correspondence thou hast so
earnestly wished me to begin on this illustrious occasion that these
exalted ladies may be abased and to obviate one of the objections that
thou madest to me when we were last together that the pleasure which
attends these nobler aims remunerates not the pains they bring with
them since like a paltry fellow as thou wert thou assertedst that all
women are alike 

thou knowest nothing jack of the delicacies of intrigue nothing of
the glory of outwitting the witty and the watchful of the joys that
fill the mind of the inventive or contriving genius ruminating which
to use of the different webs that offer to him for the entanglement of a
haughty charmer who in her day has given him unnumbered torments thou 
jack who like a dog at his ease contentest thyself to growl over
a bone thrown out to thee dost not know the joys of a chace and in
pursuing a winding game these i will endeavour to rouse thee to 
and then thou wilt have reason doubly and trebly to thank me as well
because of thy present delight as with regard to thy prospect beyond
the moon 

to this place i had written purely to amuse myself before i was
admitted to my charmer but now i have to tell thee that i was quite
right in my conjecture that she would set up for herself and dismiss
me for she has declared in so many words that such was her resolution 
and why because to be plain with me the more she saw of me and of my
ways the less she liked of either 

this cut me to the heart i did not cry indeed had i been a woman 
i should though and that most plentifully but i pulled out a white
cambrick handkerchief that i could command but not my tears 

she finds fault with my protestations with my professions with my
vows i cannot curse a servant the only privilege a master is known by 
but i am supposed to be a trooper i must not say by my soul nor 
as i hope to be saved why jack how particular this is would she not
have me think i have a precious soul as well as she if she thinks my
salvation hopeless what a devil  another exceptionable word   does she
propose to reform me for so i have not an ardent expression left me 


 see letter vi of this volume 


 



what can be done with a woman who is above flattery and despises all
praise but that which flows from the approbation of her own heart 

well jack thou seest it is high time to change my measures i must run
into the pious a little faster than i had designed 

what a sad thing it would be were i after all to lose her person 
as well as her opinion the only time that further acquaintance and no
blow struck nor suspicion given ever lessened me in a lady's favour 
a cursed mortification tis certain i can have no pretence for holding
her if she will go no such thing as force to be used or so much as
hinted at lord send us safe at london that's all i have for it now 
and yet it must be the least part of my speech 

but why will this admirable creature urge her destiny why will she defy
the power she is absolutely dependent upon why will she still wish to
my face that she had never left her father's house why will she deny me
her company till she makes me lose my patience and lay myself open
to her resentment and why when she is offended does she carry her
indignation to the utmost length that a scornful beauty in the very
height of her power and pride can go 

is it prudent thinkest thou in her circumstances to tell me 
repeatedly to tell me that she is every hour more and more
dissatisfied with herself and me that i am not one who improve upon her
in my conversation and address   couldst thou jack bear this from
a captive   that she shall not be easy while she is with me that she
knows better than to value herself upon my volubility that if i think
she deserves the compliments i make her i may pride myself in those
arts by which i have made a fool of so extraordinary a person that
she shall never forgive herself for meeting me nor me for seducing her
away   her very words   that her regrets increase instead of diminish 
that she will take care of herself and since her friends thing it
not worth while to pursue her she will be left to her own care that i
shall make mrs sorlings's house more agreeable by my absence and go
to berks to town or wherever i will   to the devil i suppose   with
all her heart 

the impolitic charmer to a temper so vindictive as she thins mine to
a free-liver as she believes me to be who has her in his power i
was before as thou knowest balancing now this scale now that the
heaviest i only waited to see how her will would work how mine would
lead me on thou seest what bias here takes and wilt thou doubt
that mine will be determined by it were not her faults before this 
numerous enough why will she put me upon looking back 

i will sit down to argue with myself by-and-by and thou shalt be
acquainted with the result 

if thou didst but know if thou hadst but beheld what an abject slave
she made me look like i had given myself high airs as she called
them but they were airs that shewed my love for her that shewed
i could not live out of her company but she took me down with a
vengeance she made me look about me so much advantage had she over me 
such severe turns upon me by my soul jack i had hardly a word to say
for myself i am ashamed to tell thee what a poor creature she made me
look like but i could have told her something that would have humbled
her pretty pride at the instant had she been in a proper place and
proper company about her 

to such a place then and where she cannot fly me and then to see
how my will works and what can be done with the amorous see-saw now
humble now proud now expecting or demanding now submitting or
acquiescing till i have tried resistance 

but these hints are at present enough i may further explain myself as
i go along and as i confirm or recede in my future motions if she
will revive past disobligations if she will but no more no more as i
said at present of threatenings 




letter xvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq  in continuation  


and do i not see that i shall need nothing but patience in order to
have all power with me for what shall we say if all these complaints
of a character wounded these declarations of increasing regrets for
meeting me of resentments never to be got over for my seducing her
away these angry commands to leaver her what shall we say if all
were to mean nothing but matrimony and what if my forbearing to enter
upon that subject come out to be the true cause of their petulance and
uneasiness 

i had once before played about the skirts of the irrevocable obligation 
but thought myself obliged to speak in clouds and to run away from the
subject as soon as she took my meaning lest she should imagine it to
be ungenerously urged now she was in some sort in my power as she
had forbid me beforehand to touch upon it till i were in a state of
visible reformation and till a reconciliation with her friends were
probable but now out-argued out-talented and pushed so vehemently to
leave one of whom i had no good pretence to hold if she would go and
who could so easily if i had given her cause to doubt have thrown
herself into other protection or have returned to harlowe-place and
solmes i spoke out upon the subject and offered reasons although
with infinite doubt and hesitation  lest she should be offended at
me belford   why she should assent to the legal tie and make me the
happiest of men and o how the mantle cheek the downcast eye the
silent yet trembling lip and the heaving bosom a sweet collection
of heightened beauties gave evidence that the tender was not mortally
offensive 

charming creature thought i  but i charge thee that thou let not
any of the sex know my exultation   is it so soon come to this am
i already lord of the destiny of a clarissa harlowe am i already
the reformed man thou resolvest i should be before i had the least
encouragement given me is it thus that the more thou knowest me the
less thou seest reason to approve of me and can art and design
enter into a breast so celestial to banish me from thee to insist so
rigorously upon my absence in order to bring me closer to thee and
make the blessing dear well do thy arts justify mine and encourage me
to let loose my plotting genius upon thee 


 mr lovelace might have spared this caution on this occasion since
many of the sex  we mention it with regret  who on the first publication
had read thus far and even to the lady's first escape have been
readier to censure her for over-niceness as we have observed in a
former note page 42 than him for artifices and exultations not less
cruel and ungrateful than ungenerous and unmanly 


but let me tell thee charming maid if thy wishes are at all to be
answered that thou hast yet to account to me for thy reluctance to go
off with me at a crisis when thy going off was necessary to avoid being
forced into the nuptial fetters with a wretch that were he not thy
aversion thou wert no more honest to thy own merit than to me 

i am accustomed to be preferred let me tell thee by thy equals in rank
too though thy inferiors in merit but who is not so and shall i marry
a woman who has given me reason to doubt the preference she has for me 

no my dearest love i have too sacred a regard for thy injunctions to
let them be broken through even by thyself nor will i take in thy full
meaning by blushing silence only nor shalt thou give me room to doubt 
whether it be necessity or love that inspires this condescending
impulse 

upon these principles what had i to do but to construe her silence into
contemptuous displeasure and i begged her pardon for making a motion
which i had so much reason to fear would offend her for the future i
would pay a sacred regard to her previous injunctions and prove to
her by all my conduct the truth of that observation that true love is
always fearful of offending 

and what could the lady say to this methinks thou askest 

say why she looked vexed disconcerted teased was at a loss as i
thought whether to be more angry with herself or with me she turned
about however as if to hide a starting tear and drew a sigh into
two or three but just audible quavers trying to suppress it and
withdrew leaving me master of the field 

tell me not of politeness tell me not of generosity tell me not of
compassion is she not a match for me more than a match does she not
outdo me at every fair weapon has she not made me doubt her love has
she not taken officious pains to declare that she was not averse to
solmes for any respect she had to me and her sorrow for putting herself
out of his reach that is to say for meeting me 

then what a triumph would it be to the harlowe pride were i now to
marry this lady a family beneath my own no one in it worthy of an
alliance with but her my own estate not contemptible living within the
bounds of it to avoid dependence upon their betters and obliged to no
man living my expectations still so much more considerable my person 
my talents not to be despised surely yet rejected by them with scorn 
obliged to carry on an underhand address to their daughter when two of
the most considerable families in the kingdom have made overtures which
i have declined partly for her sake and partly because i never will
marry if she be not the person to be forced to steal her away not
only from them but from herself and must i be brought to implore
forgiveness and reconciliation from the harlowes beg to be
acknowledged as the son of a gloomy tyrant whose only boast is his
riches as a brother to a wretch who has conceived immortal hatred to
me and to a sister who was beneath my attempts or i would have had her
in my own way and that with a tenth part of the trouble and pains that
her sister has cost me and finally as a nephew to uncles who value
themselves upon their acquired fortunes would insult me as creeping
to them on that account forbid it in the blood of the lovelaces that
your last and let me say not the meanest of your stock should thus
creep thus fawn thus lick the dust for a wife 

proceed anon 




letter xviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq  in continuation  


but is it not the divine clarissa  harlowe let me not say my soul
spurns them all but her  whom i am thus by application threatening if
virtue be the true nobility how is she ennobled and how shall an
alliance with her ennoble were not contempt due to the family from whom
she sprang and prefers to me 

but again let me stop is there not something wrong has there
not been something wrong in this divine creature and will not the
reflections upon that wrong what though it may be construed in my
favour make me unhappy when novelty has lost its charms and when 
mind and person she is all my own libertines are nicer if at all
nice than other men they seldom meet with the stand of virtue in
the women whom they attempt and by the frailty of those they have
triumphed over they judge of all the rest importunity and opportunity
no woman is proof against especially from the persevering lover who
knows how to suit temptations to inclinations  this thou knowest is a
prime article of the rake's creed 


 the particular attention of such of the fair sex as are more apt to
read for the same of amusement than instruction is requested to this
letter of mr lovelace 


and what methinks thou askest with surprise dost thou question this
most admirable of women the virtue of a clarissa dost thou question 

i do not i dare not question it my reverence for her will not let me
directly question it but let me in my turn ask thee is not may not
her virtue be founded rather in pride than in principle whose daughter
is she and is she not a daughter if impeccable how came she by her
impeccability the pride of setting an example to her sex has run away
with her hitherto and may have made her till now invincible but is not
that pride abated what may not both men and women be brought to do in a
mortified state what mind is superior to calamity pride is perhaps the
principal bulwark of female virtue humble a woman and may she not be
effectually humbled 

then who says miss clarissa harlowe is the paragon of virtue is virtue
itself 

all who know her and have heard of her it will be answered 

common bruit is virtue to be established by common bruit only has
her virtue ever been proved who has dared to try her virtue 

i told thee i would sit down to argue with myself and i have drawn
myself into argumentation before i was aware 

let me enter into a strict discussion of this subject 

i know how ungenerous an appearance what i have said and what i have
further to say on this topic will have from me but am i not bringing
virtue to the touchstone with a view to exalt it if it come out to be
proof avaunt then for one moment all consideration that may arise
from a weakness which some would miscall gratitude and is oftentimes
the corrupter of a heart most ignoble 

to the test then and i will bring this charming creature to the
strictest test that all the sex who may be shewn any passages in my
letters   and i know thou cheerest the hearts of all thy acquaintance
with such detached parts of mine as tend not to dishonour characters
or reveal names and this gives me an appetite to oblige thee by
interlardment   that all the sex i say may see what they ought to be 
what is expected from them and if they have to deal with a person of
reflection and punctilio  of pride if thou wilt   how careful they
ought to be by a regular and uniform conduct not to give him cause to
think lightly of them for favours granted which may be interpreted into
natural weakness for is not a wife the keeper of a man's honour and
do not her faults bring more disgrace upon a husband than even upon
herself 

it is not for nothing jack that i have disliked the life of shackles 

to the test then as i said since now i have the question brought home
to me whether i am to have a wife and whether she be to be a wife at
the first or at the second hand 

i will proceed fairly i do the dear creature not only strict but
generous justice for i will try her by her own judgment as well as by
our principles 

she blames herself for having corresponded with me a man of free
character and one indeed whose first view it was to draw her into this
correspondence and who succeeded in it by means unknown to herself 

now what were her inducements to this correspondence  if not what her
niceness makes her think blameworthy why does she blame herself 

has she been capable of error of persisting in that error 

whoever was the tempter that is not the thing nor what the temptation 
the fact the error is now before us 

did she persist in it against parental prohibition 

she owns she did 

was a daughter ever known who had higher notions of the filial duty of
the parental authority 

never 

what must be the inducements how strong that were too strong for
duty in a daughter so dutiful what must my thoughts have been of
these inducements what my hopes built upon them at the time taken in
this light 

well but it will be said that her principal view was to prevent
mischief between her brother and her other friends and the man vilely
insulted by them all 

but why should she be more concerned for the safety of others than they
were for their own and had not the rencounter then happened was a
person of virtue to be prevailed upon to break through her apparent her
acknowledged duty upon any consideration  and if not was she to be
so prevailed upon to prevent an apprehended evil only 

thou lovelace the tempter thou wilt again break out and say to be
the accuser 

but i am not the accuser i am the arguer only and in my heart 
all the time acquit and worship the divine creature but let me 
nevertheless examine whether the acquital be owing to her merit or to
my weakness weakness the true name of love 

but shall we suppose another motive and that is love a motive which
all the world will excuse her for but let me tell all the world that
do not because they ought but because all the world is apt to be
misled by it 

let love then be the motive love of whom 

a lovelace is the answer 

is there but one lovelace in the world may not more lovelaces be
attracted by so fine a figure by such exalted qualities it was her
character that drew me to her and it was her beauty and good sense that
rivetted my chains and now all together make me think her a subject
worthy of my attempts worthy of my ambition 

but has she had the candour the openness to acknowledge that love 

she has not 

well then if love be at the bottom is there not another fault lurking
beneath the shadow of that love has she not affectation or is it
pride of heart 

and what results is then the divine clarissa capable of loving a man
whom she ought not to love and is she capable of affectation and is
her virtue founded in pride and if the answer to these questions be
affirmative must she not then be a woman 

and can she keep this love at bay can she make him who has been
accustomed to triumph over other women tremble can she conduct
herself as to make him at times question whether she loves him or
any man yet not have the requisite command over the passion itself in
steps of the highest consequence to her honour as she thinks   i
am trying her jack by her own thoughts   but suffer herself to be
provoked to promise to abandon her father's house and go off with
him knowing his character and even conditioning not to marry till
improbably and remote contingencies were to come to pass what though
the provocations were such as would justify any other woman yet was
a clarissa to be susceptible to provocations which she thinks herself
highly censurable for being so much moved by 

but let us see the dear creature resolved to revoke her promise yet
meeting her lover a bold and intrepid man who was more than once
before disappointed by her and who comes as she knows prepared to
expect the fruits of her appointment and resolved to carry her off 
and let us see him actually carrying her off and having her at
his mercy may there not be i repeat other lovelaces other like
intrepid persevering enterprizers although they may not go to work in
the same way 

and has then a clarissa herself her judge failed in such great
points failed and may she not further fail fail in the greatest
point to which all the other points in which she has failed have but
a natural tendency 

nor say thou that virtue in the eye of heaven is as much a manly as
a womanly grace by virtue in this place i mean chastity and to be
superior to temptation my clarissa out of the question nor ask thou 
shall the man be guilty yet expect the woman to be guiltless and even
unsuspectible urge thou not these arguments i say since the wife by
a failure may do much more injury to the husband than the husband can
do to the wife and not only to her husband but to all his family by
obtruding another man's children into his possessions perhaps to the
exclusion of at least to a participation with his own he believing
them all the time to be his in the eye of heaven therefore the sin
cannot be equal besides i have read in some places that the woman was
made for the man not the man for the woman virtue then is less to be
dispensed with in the woman than in the man 

thou lovelace methinks some better man than thyself will say to
expect such perfection in a woman 

yes i may i answer was not the great caesar a great rake as to
women was he not called by his very soldiers on one of his triumphant
entries into rome the bald-pated lecher and warning given of him to
the wives as well as to the daughter of his fellow-citizens yet did
not caesar repudiate his wife for being only in company with clodius or
rather because clodius though by surprise upon her was found in hers 
and what was the reason he gave for it it was this though a rake
himself as i have said and only this the wife of caesar must not be
suspected 

caesar was not a prouder man than lovelace 

go to then jack nor say nor let any body say in thy hearing that
lovelace a man valuing himself upon his ancestry is singular in his
expectations of a wife's purity though not pure himself 

as to my clarissa i own that i hardly think there ever was such an
angel of a woman but has she not as above already taken steps which
she herself condemns steps which the world and her own family did
not think her capable of taking and for which her own family will not
forgive her 

nor think it strange that i refuse to hear any thing pleaded in behalf
of a standard virtue from high provocations are not provocations and
temptations the tests of virtue a standard virtue must not be allowed
to be provoked to destroy or annihilate itself 

may not then the success of him who could carry her thus far be
allowed to be an encouragement for him to try to carry her farther 
tis but to try who will be afraid of a trail for this divine creature 
thou knowest that i have more than once twice or thrice put to the
fiery trial young women of name and character and never yet met
with one who held out a month nor indeed so long as could puzzle my
invention i have concluded against the whole sex upon it  and now if
i have not found a virtue that cannot be corrupted i will swear that
there is not one such in the whole sex is not then the whole sex
concerned that this trial should be made and who is it that knows this
lady that would not stake upon her head the honour of the whole let
her who would refuse it come forth and desire to stand in her place 

i must assure thee that i have a prodigious high opinion of virtue as
i have of all those graces and excellencies which i have not been
able to attain myself every free-liver would not say this nor think
thus every argument he uses condemnatory of his own actions as some
would think but ingenuousness was ever a signal part of my character 

satan whom thou mayest if thou wilt in this case call my instigator 
put the good man of old upon the severest trial to his behaviour under
these trials that good man owed his honour and his future rewards 
an innocent person if doubted must wish to be brought to a fair and
candid trial 

rinaldo indeed in ariosto put the mantua knight's cup of trial from
him which was to be the proof of his wife's chastity this was his
argument for forbearing the experiment why should i seek a think i
should be loth to find my wife is a woman the sex is frail i cannot
believe better of her than i do it will be to my own loss if i find
reason to think worse  but rinaldo would not have refused the trial of
the lady before she became his wife and when he might have found his
account in detecting her 


 the story tells us that whoever drank of this cup if his wife were
chaste could drink without spilling if otherwise the contrary 


for my part i would not have put the cup from me though married had
it been but in hope of finding reason to confirm my good opinion of my
wife's honour and that i might know whether i had a snake or a dove in
my bosom 

to my point what must that virtue be which will not stand a
trial what that woman who would wish to shun it 

well then a trial seems necessary for the furthest establishment of
the honour of so excellent a creature 

and who shall put her to this trial who but the man who has as she
thinks already induced her in lesser points to swerve and this for
her own sake in a double sense not only as he has been able to make
some impression but as she regrets the impression made and so may be
presumed to be guarded against his further attempts 

the situation she is at present in it must be confessed is a
disadvantageous one to her but if she overcome that will redound to
her honour 

shun not therefore my dear soul further trials nor hate me for
making them for what woman can be said to be virtuous till she has
been tried 

nor is one effort one trial to be sufficient why because a woman's
heart may at one time be adamant at another wax' as i have often
experienced and so no doubt hast thou 

a fine time of it methinks thou sayest would the woman have if they
were all to be tried 

but jack i am not for that neither though i am a rake i am not a
rake's friend except thine and company's 

and be this one of the morals of my tedious discussion let the little
rogues who would not be put to the question as i may call it choose
accordingly let them prefer to their favour good honest sober fellows 
who have not been used to play dog's tricks who will be willing to
take them as they offer and who being tolerable themselves are not
suspicious of others 

but what methinks thou askest is to become of the lady if she fail 

what why will she not if once subdued be always subdued 
another of our libertine maxims and what an immense pleasure to a
marriage-hater what rapture to thought to be able to prevail upon such
a woman as miss clarissa harlowe to live with him without real change
of name 

but if she resist if nobly she stand her trial 

why then i will marry her and bless my starts for such an angel of a
wife 

but will she not hate thee will she not refuse 

no no jack circumstanced and situated as we are i am not afraid of
that and hate me why should she hate the man who loves her upon proof 

and then for a little hint at reprisal am i not justified in my
resolutions of trying her virtue who is resolved as i may say to try
mine who has declared that she will not marry me till she has hopes of
my reformation 

and now to put an end to this sober argumentation wilt thou not
thyself whom i have supposed an advocate for the lady because i know
that lord m has put thee upon using the interest he thinks thou hast in
me to persuade me to enter the pale wilt thou not thyself allow me to
try if i cannot awaken the woman in her to try if she with all that
glowing symmetry of parts and that full bloom of vernal graces by
which she attracts every eye be really inflexible as to the grand
article 

let me begin then as opportunity presents i will and watch her
every step to find one sliding one her every moment to find the
moment critical and the rather as she spares me not but takes every
advantage that offers to puzzle and plague me nor expect nor thinks me
to be a good man 

if she be a woman and love me i shall surely catch her once tripping 
for love was ever a traitor to its harbourer and love within and i
without she will be more than woman as the poet says or i less than
man if i succeed not 

now belford all is out the lady is mine shall be more mine 
marriage i see is in my power now she is so else perhaps it had not 
if i can have her without marriage who can blame me for trying if not 
great will be her glory and my future confidence and well will she
merit the sacrifice i shall make her of my liberty and from all her sex
honours next to divine for giving a proof that there was once a woman
whose virtue no trials no stratagems no temptations even from the man
she hated not could overpower 

now wilt thou see all my circulation as in a glass wilt thou see
it cabala however is the word nor let the secret escape thee even
in thy dreams 


 this word whenever used by any of these gentlemen was agreed to imply
an inviolable secret 


nobody doubts that she is to be my wife let her pass for such when i
give the word mean time reformation shall be my stalking-horse some
one of the women in london if i can get her hither my bird  and so
much for this time 




letter xix

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe  in answer to letters ix xv  


do not be so much concerned my dearest friend at the bickerings
between my mother and me we love one another dearly notwithstanding 
if my mother had not me to find fault with she must find fault with
somebody else and as to me i am a very saucy girl and were not this
occasion there would be some other to shew it 

you have heard me say that this was always the case between us 
you could not otherwise have known it for when you was with us you
harmonized us both and indeed i was always more afraid of you than of
my mother but then that awe is accompanied with love your reproofs 
as i have always found are so charmingly mild and instructive so
evidently calculated to improve and not to provoke that a generous
temper must be amended by them but hear now mind my good mamma when
you are not with us you shall i tell you nancy i will have it so 
don't i know best i won't be disobeyed how can a daughter of spirits
bear such language such looks too with the language and not have a
longing mind to disobey 

don't advise me my dear to subscribe to my mother's prohibition of
correspondence with you she has no reason for it nor would she of her
own judgment have prohibited it that odd old ambling soul your uncle 
 whose visits are frequenter than ever instigated by your malicious
and selfish brother and sister in the occasion and they have only
borrowed my mother's lips at the distance they are from you for a sort
of speaking trumpet for them the prohibition once more i say cannot
come from her heart but if it did is so much danger to be apprehended
from my continuing to write to one of my own sex as if i wrote to one
of the other don't let dejection and disappointment and the course
of oppression which you have run through weaken your mind my dearest
creature and make you see inconveniencies where there possibly cannot
be any if your talent is scribbling as you call it so is mine and
i will scribble on at all opportunities and to you let them say what
they will nor let your letters be filled with the self-accusations you
mention there is no cause for them i wish that your anna howe who
continues in her mother's house were but half so good as miss clarissa
harlowe who has been driven out of her father's 

i will say nothing upon your letter to your sister till i see the effect
it will have you hope you tell me that you shall have your money and
clothes sent you notwithstanding my opinion to the contrary i am sorry
to have it to acquaint you that i have just now heard that they have
sat in council upon your letter and that your mother was the only
person who was for sending you your things and was overruled i
charge you therefore to accept of my offer as by my last and give
me particular directions for what you want that i can supply you with
besides 

don't set your thought so much upon a reconciliation as to prevent your
laying hold of any handsome opportunity to give yourself a protector 
such a one as the man will be who i imagine husband-like will let
nobody insult you but himself 

what could he mean by letting slip such a one as that you mention i
don't know how to blame you for how you go beyond silence and blushes 
when the foolish fellow came with his observances of the restrictions
which you laid him under when in another situation but as i told you
above you really strike people into awe and upon my word you did not
spare him 

i repeat what i said in my last that you have a very nice part to act 
and i will add that you have a mind that is much too delicate for your
part but when the lover is exalted the lady must be humbled he is
naturally proud and saucy i doubt you must engage his pride which he
calls his honour and that you must throw off a little more of the veil 
and i would have you restrain your wishes before him that you had not
met him and the like what signifies wishing my dear he will not bear
it you can hardly expect that he will 

nevertheless it vexed me to the very bottom of my pride that any
wretch of that sex should be able to triumph over clarissa 

i cannot however but say that i am charmed with your spirit so much
sweetness where sweetness is requisite so much spirit where spirit is
called for what a true magnanimity 

but i doubt in your present circumstances you must endeavour after a
little more of the reserve in cases where you are displeased with him 
and palliate a little that humility which he puts on when you rise upon
him is not natural to him 

methinks i see the man hesitating and looking like the fool you paint
him under your corrective superiority but he is not a fool don't put
him upon mingling resentment with his love 

you are very serious my dear in the first of the two letters before
me in relation to mr hickman and me and in relation to my mother and
me but as to the latter you must not be too grave if we are not well
together at one time we are not ill together at another and while i am
able to make her smile in the midst of the most angry fit she ever fell
into on the present occasion though sometimes she would not if she
could help it it is a very good sign a sign that displeasure can
never go deep or be lasting and then a kind word or kind look to
her favourite hickman sets the one into raptures and the other in
tolerable humour at any time 

but your case pains me at heart and with all my levity both the good
folks most sometimes partake of that pain nor will it be over as long
as you are in a state of uncertainty and especially as i was not able
to prevail for that protection for you which would have prevented the
unhappy step the necessity for which we both with so much reason 
deplore 

i have only to add and yet it is needless to tell you that i am and
will ever be 

your affectionate friend and servant anna howe 




letter xx

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


you tell me my dear that my clothes and the little sum of money i left
behind me will not be sent me but i will still hope it is yet early
days when their passions subside they will better consider of the
matter and especially as i have my ever dear and excellent mother for
my friend in this request o the sweet indulgence how has my heart
bled and how does it still bleed for her 

you advise me not to depend upon a reconciliation i do not i cannot
depend upon it but nevertheless it is the wish next my heart and as
to this man what can i do you see that marriage is not absolutely in
my own power if i were inclined to prefer it to the trial which i think
i ought to have principally in view to make for a reconciliation 

you say he is proud and insolent indeed he is but can it be your
opinion that he intends to humble me down to the level of his mean
pride 

and what mean you my dear friend when you say that i must throw off
a little more of the veil indeed i never knew that i wore one let
me assure you that if i never see any thing in mr lovelace that looks
like a design to humble me his insolence shall never make me discover a
weakness unworthy of a person distinguished by your friendship that is
to say unworthy either of my sex or of my former self 

but i hope as i am out of all other protection that he is not capable
of mean or low resentments if he has had any extraordinary trouble on
my account may he not thank himself for it he may and lay it if he
pleases to his character which as i have told him gave at least a
pretence to my brother against him and then did i ever make him any
promises did i ever profess a love for him did i ever wish for the
continuance of his address had not my brother's violence precipitated
matters would not my indifference to him in all likelihood as i
designed it should have tired out his proud spirit and make him set
out for london where he used chiefly to reside and if he had would
not there have been an end of all his pretensions and hopes for no
encouragement had i given him nor did i then correspond with him 
nor believe me should i have begun to do so the fatal rencounter
not having then happened which drew me in afterwards for others' sakes
 fool that i was and not for my own and can you think or can he 
that even this but temporarily-intended correspondence which by the
way my mother connived at would have ended thus had i not been
driven on one hand and teased on the other to continue it the
occasion which had at first induced it continuing what pretence then
has he were i to be absolutely in his power to avenge himself on me
for the faults of others and through which i have suffered more than
he it cannot cannot be that i should have cause to apprehend him to
be so ungenerous so bad a man 


 see vol i letter iv 


you bid me not to be concerned at the bickerings between your mother and
you can i avoid concern when those bickerings are on my account that
they are raised instigated shall i say by my uncle and my other
relations surely must add to my concern 

but i must observe perhaps too critically for the state my mind is in
at present that the very sentences you give from your mother as in so
many imperatives which you take amiss are very severe reflections upon
yourself for instance you shall i tell you nancy implies that you
had disputed her will and so of the rest 

and further let me observe with respect to what you say that there
cannot be the same reason for a prohibition of correspondence with me 
as there was of mine with mr lovelace that i thought as little of bad
consequences from my correspondence with him at the time as you can do
from yours with me now but if obedience be a duty the breach of it is
a fault however circumstances may differ surely there is no merit in
setting up our own judgment against the judgments of our parents and
if it is punishable so to do i have been severely punished and that is
what i warned you of from my own dear experience 

yet god forgive me i advise thus against myself with very great
reluctance and to say truth have not strength of mind at present to
decline it myself but if my occasion go not off i will take it into
further consideration 

you give me very good advice in relation to this man and i thank you
for it when you bid me be more upon the reserve with him in expressing
my displeasure perhaps i may try for it but to palliate as you call
it that my dearest miss howe cannot be done by

your own clarissa harlowe 




letter xxi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


you may believe my dear miss howe that the circumstances of the noise
and outcry within the garden-door on monday last gave me no small
uneasiness to think that i was in the hands of a man who could by
such vile premeditation lay a snare to trick me out of myself as i
have so frequently called it 

whenever he came in my sight the thought of this gave me an indignation
that made his presence disgustful to me and the more as i fancied
i beheld in his face a triumph which reproached my weakness on that
account although perhaps it was only the same vivacity and placidness
that generally sit upon his features 

i was resolved to task him upon this subject the first time i could
have patience to enter upon it with him for besides that it piqued me
excessively from the nature of the artifice i expected shuffling and
evasion if he were guilty that would have incensed me and if not
confessedly guilty such unsatisfactory declarations as still would have
kept my mind doubtful and uneasy and would upon every new offence that
he might give me sharpen my disgust to me 

i have had the opportunity i waited for and will lay before you the
result 

he was making his court to my good opinion in very polite terms and
with great seriousness lamenting that he had lost it declaring that he
knew not how he had deserved to do so attributing to me an indifference
to him that seemed to his infinite concern hourly to increase and
he besought me to let him know my whole mind that he might have an
opportunity either to confess his faults and amend them or clear his
conduct to my satisfaction and thereby entitle himself to a greater
share of my confidence 

i answered him with quickness then mr lovelace i will tell you one
thing with a frankness that is perhaps more suitable to my character
than to yours  he hoped not he said   which gives me a very bad
opinion of you as a designing artful man 

i am all attention madam 

i never can think tolerably of you while the noise and voice i heard at
the garden-door which put me into the terror you took so much advantage
of remains unaccounted for tell me fairly tell me candidly the
whole of that circumstance and of your dealings with that wicked joseph
leman and according to your explicitness in this particular i shall
form a judgment of your future professions 

i will without reserve my dearest life said he tell you the whole 
and hope that my sincerity in the relation will atone for any thing you
may think wrong in the fact 

i knew nothing said he of this man this leman and should have
scorned a resort to so low a method as bribing the servant of any family
to let me into the secrets of that family if i had not detected him
in attempting to corrupt a servant of mine to inform him of all my
motions of all my supposed intrigues and in short of every action
of my private life as well as of my circumstances and engagements and
this for motives too obvious to be dwelt upon 

my servant told me of his offers and i ordered him unknown to the
fellow to let me hear a conversation that was to pass between them 

in the midst of it and just as he had made an offer of money for a
particular piece of intelligence promising more when procured i broke
in upon them and by bluster calling for a knife to cut off his ears
 one of which i took hold of in order to make a present of it as i
said to his employers i obliged him to tell me who they were 

your brother madam and your uncle antony he named 

it was not difficult when i had given him my pardon on naming them 
 after i had set before him the enormity of the task he had undertaken 
and the honourableness of my intentions to your dear self to prevail
upon him by a larger reward to serve me since at the same time he
might preserve the favour of your uncle and brother as i desired to
know nothing but what related to myself and to you in order to guard us
both against the effects of an ill-will which all his fellow-servants 
as well as himself as he acknowledged thought undeserved 

by this means i own to you madam i frequently turned his principals
about upon a pivot of my own unknown to themselves and the fellow who
is always calling himself a plain man and boasting of his conscience 
was the easier as i condescended frequently to assure him of
my honourable views and as he knew that the use i made of his
intelligence in all likelihood prevented fatal mischiefs 

i was the more pleased with his services as let me acknowledge
to you madam they procured to you unknown to yourself a safe and
uninterrupted egress which perhaps would not otherwise have been
continued to you so long as it was to the garden and wood-house for he
undertook to them to watch all your motions and the more cheerfully 
 for the fellow loves you as it kept off the curiosity of others  


 see vol ii letter xxxvi 


so my dear it comes out that i myself was obliged to this deep
contriver 

i sat in silent astonishment and thus he went on 

as to the circumstance for which you think so hardly of me i do
freely confess that having a suspicion that you would revoke your
intention of getting away and in that case apprehending that we should
not have the time together that was necessary for that purpose i had
ordered him to keep off every body he could keep off and to be himself
within a view of the garden-door for i was determined if possible to
induce you to adhere to your resolution  

but pray sir interrupting him how came you to apprehend that i should
revoke my intention i had indeed deposited a letter to that purpose 
but you had it not and how as i had reserved to myself the privilege
of a revocation did you know but i might have prevailed upon my
friends and so have revoked upon good grounds 

i will be very ingenuous madam you had made me hope that if you
changed your mind you would give me a meeting to apprize me of the
reasons for it i went to the loose bricks and i saw the letter there 
and as i knew your friends were immovably fixed in their schemes i
doubted not but the letter was to revoke or suspend your resolution and
probably to serve instead of a meeting too i therefore let it lie that
if you did revoke you might be under the necessity of meeting me for
the sake of the expectation you had given me and as i came prepared i
was resolved pardon me madam whatever were your intentions that you
should not go back had i taken your letter i must have been determined
by the contents of it for the present at least but not having
received it and you having reason to think i wanted not resolution in
a situation so desperate to make your friends a personal visit i
depended upon the interview you had bid me hope for 

wicked wretch said i it is my grief that i gave you opportunity to
take so exact a measure of my weakness but would you have presumed to
visit the family had i not met you 

indeed i would i had some friends in readiness who were to have
accompanied me to them and had your father refused to give me audience 
i would have taken my friends with me to solmes 

and what did you intend to do to mr solmes 

not the least hurt had the man been passive 

but had he not been passive as you call it what would you have done to
mr solmes 

he was loth he said to tell me yet not the least hurt to his person 

i repeated my question 

if he must tell me he only proposed to carry off the poor fellow and
to hide him for a month or two and this he would have done let what
would have been the consequence 

was ever such a wretch heard of i sighed from the bottom of my heart 
but bid him proceed from the part i had interrupted him at 

i ordered the fellow as i told you madam said he to keep within
view of the garden-door and if he found any parley between us and any
body coming before you could retreat undiscovered whose coming might
be attended with violent effects he should cry out and this not only
in order to save himself from their suspicions of him but to give me
warning to make off and if possible to induce you i own it madam 
to go off with me according to your own appointment and i hope all
circumstances considered and the danger i was in of losing you for
ever that the acknowledgement of that contrivance or if you had not
met me that upon solmes will not procure me your hatred for had they
come as i expected as well as you what a despicable wretch had i been 
could i have left you to the insults of a brother and other of your
family whose mercy was cruelty when they had not the pretence with
which this detected interview would have furnished them 

what a wretch said i but if sir taking your own account of this
strange matter to be fact any body were coming how happened it that i
saw only that man leman i thought it was he out at the door and at a
distance look after us 

very lucky said he putting his hand first in one pocket then in
another i hope i have not thrown it away it is perhaps in the coat
i had on yesterday little did i think it would be necessary to be
produced but i love to come to a demonstration whenever i can i may
be giddy i may be heedless i am indeed but no man as to you madam 
ever had a sincerer heart 

he then stepping to the parlour-door called his servant to bring him
the coat he had on yesterday 

the servant did and in the pocket rumpled up as a paper he regarded
not he pulled out a letter written by that joseph dated monday night 
in which he begs pardon for crying out so soon says that his fears of
being discovered to act on both sides had made him take the rushing of
a little dog that always follows him through the phyllirea-hedge for
betty's being at hand or some of his masters and that when he found
his mistake he opened the door by his own key which the contriving
wretch confessed he had furnished him with and inconsiderately ran out
in a hurry to have apprized him that his crying out was owing to his
fright only  and he added that they were upon the hunt for me by the
time he returned 


 see his letter to joseph leman vol iii no iii towards the end where
he tells him he would contrive for him a letter of this nature to copy 


i shook my head deep deep deep said i at the best o mr lovelace 
god forgive and reform you but you are i see plainly upon the whole
of your own account a very artful a very designing man 

love my dearest life is ingenious night and day have i racked my
stupid brain  o sir thought i not stupid twere well perhaps if it
were  to contrive methods to prevent the sacrifice designed to be made
of you and the mischief that must have ensued upon it so little hold
in your affections such undeserved antipathy from your friends so much
danger of losing you for ever from both causes i have not had for the
whole fortnight before last monday half an hour's rest at a time and
i own to you madam that i should never have forgiven myself had i
omitted any contrivance or forethought that would have prevented your
return without me 

again i blamed myself for meeting him and justly for there were
many chances to one that i had not met him and if i had not all his
fortnight's contrivances as to me would have come to nothing and 
perhaps i might nevertheless have escaped solmes 

yet had he resolved to come to harlowe-place with his friends and been
insulted as he certainly would have been what mischiefs might have
followed 

but his resolutions to run away with and to hide the poor solmes for
a month or so o my dear what a wretch have i let run away with me 
instead of solmes 

i asked him if he thought such enormities as these such defiances of
the laws of society would have passed unpunished 

he had the assurance to say with one of his usual gay airs that he
should by this means have disappointed his enemies and saved me from a
forced marriage he had no pleasure in such desperate pushes solmes
he would not have personally hurt he must have fled his country for a
time at least and truly if he had been obliged to do so as all
his hopes of my favour must have been at an end he would have had a
fellow-traveller of his own sex out of our family whom i little thought
of 

was ever such a wretch to be sure he meant my brother 

and such sir said i in high resentment are the uses you make of your
corrupt intelligencer 

my corrupt intelligencer madam interrupted he he is to this hour your
brother's as well as mine by what i have ingenuously told you you may
see who began this corruption let me assure you madam that there are
many free things which i have been guilty of as reprisals in which i
would not have been the aggressor 

all that i shall further say on this head mr lovelace is this that
as this vile double-faced wretch has probably been the cause of great
mischief on both sides and still continues as you own his wicked
practices i think it would be but just to have my friends apprized
what a creature he is whom some of them encourage 

what you please madam as to that my service as well as your
brother's is now almost over for him the fellow has made a good hand of
it he does not intend to stay long in his place he is now actually in
treaty for an inn which will do his business for life i can tell
you further that he makes love to your sister's betty and that by my
advice they will be married when he is established an innkeeper's
wife is every man's mistress and i have a scheme in my head to set some
engines at work to make her repent her saucy behaviour to you to the
last day of her life 

what a wicked schemer you are sir who shall avenge upon you the still
greater evils which you have been guilty of i forgive betty with all
my heart she was not my servant and but too probably in what she did 
obeyed the commands of her to whom she owed duty better than i obeyed
those to whom i owed more 

no matter for that the wretch said  to be sure my dear he must
design to make me afraid of him  the decree was gone out betty must
smart smart too by an act of her own choice he loved he said to
make bad people their own punishers nay madam excuse me but if the
fellow if this joseph in your opinion deserves punishment mine is
a complicated scheme a man and his wife cannot well suffer separately 
and it may come home to him too 

i had no patience with him i told him so i see sir said i i see 
what a man i am with your rattle warns me of the snake and away i
flung leaving him seemingly vexed and in confusion 




letter xxii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


my plain-dealing with mr lovelace on seeing him again and the free
dislike i expressed to his ways his manners and his contrivances as
well as to his speeches have obliged him to recollect himself a little 
he will have it that the menaces which he threw out just now against my
brother and mr solmes are only the effect of an unmeaning pleasantry 
he has too great a stake in his country he says to be guilty of such
enterprises as should lay him under a necessity of quitting it for ever 
twenty things particularly he says he has suffered joseph leman to
tell him of that were not and could not be true in order to make
himself formidable in some people's eyes and this purely with a view
to prevent mischief he is unhappy as far as he knows in a quick
invention in hitting readily upon expedients and many things are
reported of him which he never said and many which he never did and
others which he has only talked of as just now and which he has
forgot as soon as the words have passed his lips 

this may be so in part my dear no one man so young could be so
wicked as he has been reported to be but such a man at the head of
such wretches as he is said to have at his beck all men of fortune and
fearlessness and capable of such enterprises as i have unhappily found
him capable of what is not to be apprehended from him 

his carelessness about his character is one of his excuses a very
bad one what hope can a woman have of a man who values not his own
reputation these gay wretches may in mixed conversation divert for
an hour or so but the man of probity the man of virtue is the man
that is to be the partner for life what woman who could help it would
submit it to the courtesy of a wretch who avows a disregard to all
moral sanctions whether he will perform his part of the matrimonial
obligation and treat her with tolerable politeness 

with these notions and with these reflections to be thrown upon such a
man myself would to heaven but what avail wishes now to whom can i
fly if i would fly from him 




letter xxiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq friday april 14 


never did i hear of such a parcel of foolish toads as these
harlowes why belford the lady must fall if every hair of her head
were a guardian angel unless they were to make a visible appearance for
her or snatching her from me at unawares would draw her after them
into the starry regions 

all i had to apprehend was that a daughter so reluctantly carried
off would offer terms to her father and would be accepted upon a
mutual concedence they to give up solmes she to give up me and so i
was contriving to do all i could to guard against the latter but they
seem resolved to perfect the work they have begun 

what stupid creatures are there in the world this foolish brother not
to know that he who would be bribed to undertake a base thing by one 
would be over-bribed to retort the baseness especially when he could be
put into the way to serve himself by both thou jack wilt never know
one half of my contrivances 


 he here relates the conversation between him and the lady upon the
 subject of the noise and exclamations his agent made at the garden-
 door to the same effect as in the lady's letter no xxi and
 proceeds exulting 

what a capacity for glorious mischief has thy friend yet how near the
truth all of it the only derivation my asserting that the fellow
made the noises by mistake and through fright and not by previous
direction had she known the precise truth her anger to be so taken
in would never have let her forgive me 

had i been a military hero i should have made gunpowder useless for
i should have blown up all my adversaries by dint of stratagem turning
their own devices upon them 

but these fathers and mothers lord help em were not the powers of
nature stronger than those of discretion and were not that busy dea
bona to afford her genial aids till tardy prudence qualified parents to
manage their future offspring how few people would have children 

james and arabella may have their motives but what can be said for a
father acting as this father has acted what for a mother what for
an aunt what for uncles who can have patience with such fellows and
fellowesses 

soon will the fair one hear how high their foolish resentments run
against her and then will she it is to be hoped have a little more
confidence in me then will i be jealous that she loves me not with the
preference my heart builds upon then will i bring her to confessions
of grateful love and then will i kiss her when i please and not stand
trembling as now like a hungry hound who sees a delicious morsel
within his reach the froth hanging upon his vermilion jaws yet dares
not leap at it for his life 

but i was originally a bashful mortal indeed i am bashful still with
regard to this lady bashful yet know the sex so well but that indeed
is the reason that i know it so well for jack i have had abundant
cause when i have looked into myself by way of comparison with the
other sex to conclude that a bashful man has a good deal of the soul of
a woman and so like tiresias can tell what they think and what they
drive at as well as themselves 

the modest ones and i particularly are pretty much upon a par the
difference between us is only what they think i act but the immodest
ones out-do the worst of us by a bar's length both in thinking and
acting 

one argument let me plead in proof of my assertion that even we rakes
love modesty in a woman while the modest woman as they are accounted 
 that is to say the slyest love and generally prefer an impudent
man whence can this be but from a likeness in nature and this made
the poet say that ever woman is a rake in her heart it concerns them 
by their actions to prove the contrary if they can 

thus have i read in some of the philosophers that no wickedness is
comparable to the wickedness of a woman canst thou tell me jack who
says this was it socrates for he had the devil of a wife or who or
is it solomon king solomon thou remembrest to have read of such a
king dost thou not sol-o-mon i learned in my infant state  my mother
was a good woman  to answer when asked who was the wisest man but my
indulgent questioner never asked me how he came by the uninspired part
of his wisdom 


 mr lovelace is as much out in his conjecture of solomon as of
socrates the passage is in ecclesiasticus chap xxv 


come come jack you and i are not so very bad could we but stop where
we are 


 he then gives the particulars of what passed between him and the lady on
 his menaces relating to her brother and mr solmes and of his design
 to punish betty barnes and joseph leman 




letter xxiv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday apr 14 


i will now give you the particulars of a conversation that has just
passed between mr lovelace and me which i must call agreeable 

it began with his telling me that he had just received intelligence
that my friends were on a sudden come to a resolution to lay aside all
thoughts of pursuing me or of getting me back and that therefore he
attended me to know of my pleasure and what i would do or have him do 

i told him that i would have him leave me directly and that when it
was known to every body that i was absolutely independent of him it
would pass that i had left my father's house because of my brother's
ill usage of me which was a plea that i might make with justice and to
the excuse of my father as well as of myself 

he mildly replied that if we could be certain that my relations would
adhere to this their new resolution he could have no objection since
such was my pleasure but as he was well assured that they had taken it
only from apprehensions that a more active one might involve my brother
 who had breathed nothing but revenge in some fatal misfortune there
was too much reason to believe that they would resume their former
purpose the moment they should think they safely might 

this madam said he is a risque i cannot run you would think it
strange if i could and yet as soon as i knew they had so given out i
thought it proper to apprize you of it and take your commands upon it 

let me hear said i willing to try if he had any particular view 
what you think most advisable 

tis very easy to say that if i durst if i might not offend you if it
were not to break conditions that shall be inviolable with me 

say then sir what you would say i can approve or disapprove as i
think fit 

had not the man a fine opportunity here to speak out he had and thus
he used it 

to wave madam what i would say till i have more courage to speak
out  more courage mr lovelace more courage my dear   i will only
propose what i think will be most agreeable to you suppose if you
choose not to go to lady betty's that you take a turn cross the country
to windsor 

why to windsor 

because it is a pleasant place because it lies in the way either to
berkshire to oxford or to london berkshire where lord m is at
present oxford in the neighbourhood of which lives lady betty london 
whither you may retire at your pleasure or if you will have it so 
whither i may go you staying at windsor and yet be within an easy
distance of you if any thing should happen or if your friends should
change their new-taken resolution 

this proposal however displeased me not but i said my only objection
was the distance of windsor from miss howe of whom i should be glad to
be always within two or three hours reach of by messenger if possible 

if i had thoughts of any other place than windsor or nearer to
miss howe he wanted but my commands and would seek for proper
accommodations but fix as i pleased farther or nearer he had
servants and they had nothing else to do but to obey me 

a grateful thing then he named to me to send for my hannah as soon as
i shall be fixed unless i would choose one of the young gentlewomen
here to attend me both of whom as i had acknowledged were very
obliging and he knew i had generosity enough to make it worth their
while 


 see his reasons for proposing windsor letter xxv and her hannah 
letter xxvi 


this of hannah he might see i took very well i said i had thoughts
of sending for her as soon as i got to more convenient lodgings as to
these young gentlewomen it were pity to break in upon that usefulness
which the whole family were of to each other each having her proper
part and performing it with an agreeable alacrity insomuch that i
liked them all so well that i could even pass my days among them were
he to leave me by which means the lodgings would be more convenient to
me than now they were 

he need not repeat his objections to this place he said but as to
going to windsor or wherever else i thought fit or as to his personal
attendance or leaving me he would assure me he very agreeably said 
that i could propose nothing in which i thought my reputation and even
my punctilio concerned that he would not cheerfully come into and
since i was so much taken up with my pen he would instantly order his
horse to be got ready and would set out 

not to be off my caution have you any acquaintance at windsor said
i know you of any convenient lodgings there 

except the forest replied he where i have often hunted i know the
least of windsor of any place so noted and so pleasant indeed i have
not a single acquaintance there 

upon the whole i told him that i thought his proposal of windsor not
amiss and that i would remove thither if i could get a lodging only
for myself and an upper chamber for hannah for that my stock of money
was but small as was easy to be conceived and i should be very loth to
be obliged to any body i added that the sooner i removed the better 
for that then he could have no objection to go to london or berkshire 
as he pleased and i should let every body know my independence 

he again proposed himself in very polite terms for my banker but i 
as civilly declined his offer 

this conversation was to be all of it in the main agreeable he asked
whether i would choose to lodge in the town of windsor or out of it 

as near the castle i said as possible for the convenience of going
constantly to the public worship an opportunity i had been very long
deprived of 

he should be very glad he told me if he could procure me
accommodations in any one of the canon's houses which he imagined would
be more agreeable to me than any other on many accounts and as he
could depend upon my promise never to have any other man but himself 
on the condition to which he had so cheerfully subscribed he should be
easy since it was now his part in earnest to set about recommending
himself to my favour by the only way he knew it would be done adding 
with a very serious air i am but a young man madam but i have run a
long course let not your purity of mind incline you to despise me for
the acknowledgement it is high time to be weary of it and to reform 
since like solomon i can say there is nothing new under the sun but
that it is my belief that a life of virtue can afford such pleasures 
on reflection as will be for ever blooming for ever new 

i was agreeably surprised i looked at him i believe as if i doubted
my ears and my eyes his aspect however became his words 

i expressed my satisfaction in terms so agreeable to him that he said 
he found a delight in this early dawning of a better day to him and in
my approbation which he had never received from the success of the most
favoured of his pursuits 

surely my dear the man must be in earnest he could not have said
this he could not have thought it had he not what followed made me
still readier to believe him 

in the midst of my wild vagaries said he i have ever preserved a
reverence for religion and for religious men i always called another
cause when any of my libertine companions in pursuance of lord
shaftesbury's test which is a part of the rake's creed and what i
may call the whetstone of infidelity endeavoured to turn the sacred
subject into ridicule on this very account i have been called by good
men of the clergy who nevertheless would have it that i was a practical
rake the decent rake and indeed i had too much pride in my shame to
disown the name of rake 

this madam i am the readier to confess as it may give you hope that
the generous task of my reformation which i flatter myself you will
have the goodness to undertake will not be so difficult a one as you
may have imagined for it has afforded me some pleasure in my retired
hours when a temporary remorse has struck me for any thing i have done
amiss that i should one day delight in another course of life for 
unless we can i dare say no durable good is to be expected from the
endeavour your example madam must do all must confirm all 


 that he proposes one day to reform and that he has sometimes good
motions see vol i letter xxxiv 


the divine grace or favour mr lovelace must do all and confirm
all you know not how much you please me that i can talk to you in this
dialect 

and i then thought of his generosity to his pretty rustic and of his
kindness to his tenants 

yet madam be pleased to remember one thing reformation cannot be a
sudden work i have infinite vivacity it is that which runs away with
me judge dearest madam by what i am going to confess that i have
a prodigious way to journey on before a good person will think me
tolerable since though i have read in some of our perfectionists enough
to make a better man than myself either run into madness or despair
about the grace you mention yet i cannot enter into the meaning of the
word nor into the modus of its operation let me not then be checked 
when i mention your example for my visible reliance and instead of
using such words till i can better understand them suppose all the
rest included in the profession of that reliance 

i told him that although i was somewhat concerned at his expression 
and surprised at so much darkness as for want of another word i would
call it in a man of his talents and learning yet i was pleased with
his ingenuousness i wished him to encourage this way of thinking i
told him that his observation that no durable good was to be expected
from any new course where there was not a delight taken in it was just 
but that the delight would follow by use 

and twenty things of this sort i even preached to him taking care 
however not to be tedious nor to let my expanded heart give him a
contracted or impatient blow and indeed he took visible pleasure in
what i said and even hung upon the subject when i to try him once
or twice seemed ready to drop it and proceeded to give me a most
agreeable instance that he could at times think both deeply and
seriously thus it was 

he was once he said dangerously wounded in a duel in the left arm 
baring it to shew me the scar that this notwithstanding a great
effusion of blood it being upon an artery was followed by a violent
fever which at last fixed upon his spirits and that so obstinately 
that neither did he desire life nor his friends expect it that for a
month together his heart as he thought was so totally changed that
he despised his former courses and particularly that rashness which had
brought him to the state he was in and his antagonist who however 
was the aggressor into a much worse that in this space he had thought
which at times still gave him pleasure to reflect upon and although
these promising prospects changed as he recovered health and spirits 
yet he parted with them with so much reluctance that he could not help
shewing it in a copy of verses truly blank ones he said some of which
he repeated and advantaged by the grace which he gives to every thing
he repeats i thought them very tolerable ones the sentiments however 
much graver than i expected from him 

he has promised me a copy of the lines and then i shall judge better
of their merit and so shall you the tendency of them was that since
sickness only gave him a proper train of thinking and that his restored
health brought with it a return to his evil habits he was ready to
renounce those gifts of nature for those of contemplation 

he farther declared that although these good motions went off as
he had owned on his recovery yet he had better hopes now from
the influence of my example and from the reward before him if he
persevered and that he was the more hopeful that he should as his
present resolution was made in a full tide of health and spirits and
when he had nothing to wish for but perseverance to entitle himself to
my favour 

i will not throw cold water mr lovelace said i on a rising flame 
but look to it for i shall endeavour to keep you up to this spirit i
shall measure your value of me by this test and i would have you bear
those charming lines of mr rowe for ever in your mind you who have 
by your own confession so much to repent of and as the scar indeed 
you shewed me will in one instance remind you to your dying day 

the lines my dear are from the poet's ulysses you have heard me often
admire them and i repeated them to him 

 habitual evils change not on a sudden 
 but many days must pass and many sorrows 
 conscious remorse and anguish must be felt 
 to curb desire to break the stubborn will 
 and work a second nature in the soul 
 ere virtue can resume the place she lost 
 tis else dissimulation 

he had often read these lines he said but never tasted them
before by his soul the unmortified creature swore and as he hoped
to be saved he was now in earnest in his good resolutions he had said 
before i repeated those lines from rowe that habitual evils could
not be changed on a sudden but he hoped he should not be thought a
dissembler if he were not enabled to hold his good purposes since
ingratitude and dissimulation were vices that of all others he abhorred 

may you ever abhor them said i they are the most odious of all vices 

i hope my dear miss howe i shall not have occasion in my future
letters to contradict these promising appearances should i have
nothing on his side to combat with i shall be very far from being
happy from the sense of my fault and the indignation of all my
relations so shall not fail of condign punishment for it from my
inward remorse on account of my forfeited character but the least ray
of hope could not dart in upon me without my being willing to lay hold
of the very first opportunity to communicate it to you who take so
generous a share in all my concerns 

nevertheless you may depend upon it my dear that these agreeable
assurances and hopes of his begun reformation shall not make me forget
my caution not that i think at worst any more than you that he dare
to harbour a thought injurious to my honour but he is very various 
and there is an apparent and even an acknowledged unfixedness in his
temper which at times gives me uneasiness i am resolved therefore to
keep him at a distance from my person and my thoughts as much as i can 
for whether all men are or are not encroachers i am sure mr lovelace
is one 

hence it is that i have always cast about and will continue to cast
about what ends he may have in view from this proposal or from that
report in a word though hopeful of the best i will always be fearful
of the worst in every thing that admits of doubt for it is better in
such a situation as mine to apprehend without cause than to subject
myself to surprise for want of forethought 

mr lovelace is gone to windsor having left two servants to attend me 
he purposes to be back to-morrow 

i have written to my aunt hervey to supplicate her interest in my
behalf for my clothes books and money signifying to her that if i
may be restored to the favour of my family and allowed a negative only 
as to any man who may be proposed to me and be used like a daughter 
a niece and a sister i will stand by my offer to live single 
and submit as i ought to a negative from my father  intimating 
nevertheless that it were perhaps better after the usage i have
received from my brother and sister that i may be allowed to be distant
from them as well for their sakes as for my own  meaning as i
suppose it will be taken at my dairy-house offering to take my
father's directions as to the manner i shall live in the servants i
shall have and in every thing that shall shew the dutiful subordination
to which i am willing to conform 

my aunt will know by my letter to my sister how to direct to me if she
be permitted to favour me with a line 

i am equally earnest with her in this letter as i was with my sister
in that i wrote to her to obtain for me a speedy reconciliation that i
not be further precipitated intimating that by a timely lenity all
may pass for a misunderstanding only which otherwise will be thought
equally disgraceful to them and to me appealing to her for the
necessity i was under to do what i did  

had i owned that i was overreached and forced away against my
intention might they not as a proof of the truth of my assertion have
insisted upon my immediate return to them and if i did not return 
would they not have reason to suppose that i had now altered my mind
 if such were my mind or had not the power to return then were i
to have gone back must it not have been upon their own terms no
conditioning with a father is a maxim with my father and with my
uncles if i would have gone mr lovelace would have opposed it so i
must have been under his controul or have run away from him as it is
supposed i did to him from harlowe-place in what a giddy light would
this have made me appear had he constrained me could i have
appealed to my friends for their protection without risking the very
consequences to prevent which setting up myself presumptuously as a
middle person between flaming spirits i have run into such terrible
inconveniencies 

but after all must it not give me great anguish of mind to be forced
to sanctify as i may say by my seeming after-approbation a measure
i was so artfully tricked into and which i was so much resolved not to
take 

how one evil brings on another is sorrowfully witnessed to by

your ever-obliged and affectionate cl harlowe 




letter xxv

mr lovelace to john belford esq friday apr 14 


thou hast often reproached me jack with my vanity without
distinguishing the humourous turn that accompanies it and for which at
the same time that thou robbest me of the merit of it thou admirest
me highly envy gives thee the indistinction nature inspires the
admiration unknown to thyself it inspires it but thou art too clumsy
and too short-sighted a mortal to know how to account even for the
impulses by which thou thyself art moved 

well but this acquits thee not of my charge of vanity lovelace 
methinks thou sayest 

and true thou sayest for i have indeed a confounded parcel of it but 
if men of parts may not be allowed to be in vain who should and yet 
upon second thoughts men of parts have the least occasion of any to be
vain since the world so few of them are there in it are ready to find
them out and extol them if a fool can be made sensible that there is
a man who has more understanding than himself he is ready enough to
conclude that such a man must be a very extraordinary creature 

and what at this rate is the general conclusion to be drawn from the
premises is it not that no man ought to be vain but what if a man
can't help it this perhaps may be my case but there is nothing upon
which i value myself so much as upon my inventions and for the soul of
me i cannot help letting it be seen that i do yet this vanity may be
a mean perhaps to overthrow me with this sagacious lady 

she is very apprehensive of me i see i have studied before her and miss
howe as often as i have been with them to pass for a giddy thoughtless
creature what a folly then to be so expatiatingly sincere in my answer
to her home put upon the noises within the garden but such success
having attended that contrivance  success jack has blown many a man
up   my cursed vanity got uppermost and kept down my caution the
menace to have secreted solmes and that other that i had thoughts to
run away with her foolish brother and of my project to revenge her upon
the two servants so much terrified the dear creature that i was forced
to sit down to muse after means to put myself right in her opinion 

some favourable incidents at the time tumbled in from my agent in
her family at least such as i was determined to make favourable and
therefore i desired admittance and this before she could resolve any
thing against me that is to say while her admiration of my intrepidity
kept resolution in suspense 

accordingly i prepared myself to be all gentleness all obligingness 
all serenity and as i have now and then and always had more or less 
good motions pop up in my mind i encouraged and collected every thing
of this sort that i had ever had from novicehood to maturity  not long
in recollecting jack   in order to bring the dear creature into
good humour with me and who knows thought i if i can hold it and
proceed but i may be able to lay a foundation fit to build my grand
scheme upon love thought i is not naturally a doubter fear is 
i will try to banish the latter nothing then but love will remain 
credulity is the god of love's prime minister and they never are
asunder 


 he had said letter xviii that he would make reformation
 his stalking-horse etc 


 he then acquaints his friend with what passed between him
 and the lady in relation to his advices from harlowe-
 place and to his proposal about lodgings pretty much to
 the same purpose as in her preceding letter 

 when he cones to mention his proposal of the windsor
 lodgings thus heexpresses himself 

now belford can it enter into thy leaden head what i meant by this
proposal i know it cannot and so i'll tell thee 

to leave her for a day or two with a view to serve her by my absence 
would as i thought look like a confiding in her favour i could not
think of leaving her thou knowest while i had reason to believe her
friends would pursue us and i began to apprehend that she would suspect
that i made a pretence of that intentional pursuit to keep about her and
with her but now that they had declared against it and that they would
not receive her if she went back a declaration she had better hear
first from me than from miss howe or any other what should hinder me
from giving her this mark of my obedience especially as i could leave
will who is a clever fellow and can do any thing but write and spell 
and lord m s jonas not as guards to be sure but as attendants only 
the latter to be dispatched to me occasionally by the former whom i
could acquaint with my motions 

then i wanted to inform myself why i had not congratulatory letters
from lady sarah and lady betty and from my cousins montague to whom i
had written glorying in my beloved's escape which letters if properly
worded might be made necessary to shew her as matters proceed 

as to windsor i had no design to carry her particularly thither but
somewhere it was proper to name as she condescended to ask my advice
about it london i durst not but very cautiously and so as to make it
her own option for i must tell thee that there is such a perverseness
in the sex that when they ask your advice they do it only to know your
opinion that they may oppose it though had not the thing in question
been your choice perhaps it had been theirs 

i could easily give reasons against windsor after i had pretended to
be there and this would have looked the better as it was a place of
my own nomination and shewn her that i had no fixed scheme never was
there in woman such a sagacious such an all-alive apprehension as in
this yet it is a grievous thing to an honest man to be suspected 

then in my going or return i can call upon mrs greme she and my
beloved had a great deal of talk together if i knew what it was about 
and that either upon their first acquaintance was for benefiting
herself by the other i might contrive to serve them both without
hurting myself for these are the most prudent ways of doing
friendships and what are not followed by regrets though the served
should prove ingrateful then mrs greme corresponds by pen-and-ink with
her farmer-sister where we are something may possibly arise that way 
either of a convenient nature which i may pursue or of an inconvenient
nature which i may avoid 

always be careful of back doors is a maxim with me in all my exploits 
whoever knows me knows that i am no proud man i can talk as familiarly
to servants as to principals when i have a mind to make it worth their
while to oblige me in any thing then servants are but as the common
soldiers in an army they do all the mischief frequently without malice 
and merely good souls for mischief-sake 

i am most apprehensive about miss howe she has a confounded deal of
wit and wants only a subject to shew as much roguery and should i
be outwitted with all my sententious boasting of conceit of my own
nostrum-mongership  i love to plague thee who art a pretender to
accuracy and a surface-skimmer in learning with out-of-the-way words
and phrases  i should certainly hang drown or shoot myself 

poor hickman i pity him for the prospect he has with such a virago but
the fellow's a fool god wot and now i think of it it is absolutely
necessary for complete happiness in the married state that one should
be a fool  an argument i once held with this very miss howe   but then
the fool should know the other's superiority otherwise the obstinate
one will disappoint the wise one 

but my agent joseph has helped me to secure this quarter as i have
hinted to thee more than once 




letter xxvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq  in continuation  


but is it not a confounded thing that i cannot fasten an obligation upon
this proud beauty i have two motives in endeavouring to prevail upon
her to accept of money and raiment from me one the real pleasure i
should have in the accommodating of the haughty maid and to think there
was something near her and upon her that i could call mine the other 
in order to abate her severity and humble her a little 

nothing more effectually brings down a proud spirit than a sense of
lying under pecuniary obligations this has always made me solicitous
to avoid laying myself under any such yet sometimes formerly have
i been put to it and cursed the tardy resolution of the quarterly
periods and yet i ever made shift to avoid anticipation i never would
eat the calf in the cow's belly as lord m s phrase is for what is
that but to hold our lands upon tenant-courtesy the vilest of all
tenures to be denied a fox-chace for breaking down a fence upon my own
grounds to be clamoured at for repairs studied for rather than really
wanted to be prated to by a bumpkin with his hat on and his arms
folded as if he defied your expectations of that sort his foot firmly
fixed as if upon his own ground and you forced to take his arch leers 
and stupid gybes he intimating by the whole of his conduct that he
had had it in his power to oblige you and if you behave civilly may
oblige you again i who think i have a right to break every man's head
i pass by if i like not his looks to bear this no more could i do
it then i could borrow of an insolent uncle or inquisitive aunt who
would thence think themselves entitled to have an account of all my life
and actions laid before them for their review and censure 

my charmer i see has a pride like my own but she has no distinction
in her pride nor knows the pretty fool that there is nothing nobler 
nothing more delightful than for loves to be conferring and receiving
obligations from each other in this very farm-yard to give thee a
familiar instance i have more than once seen this remark illustrated a
strutting rascal of a cock have i beheld chuck chuck chuck chuck-ing
his mistress to him when he has found a single barley-corn taking it
up with his bill and letting it drop five or six times still repeating
his chucking invitation and when two or three of his feathered ladies
strive who shall be the first for it  o jack a cock is a grand signor
of a bird   he directs the bill of the foremost to it and when she has
got the dirty pearl he struts over her with an erected crest cling
round her with dropt wings sweeping the dust in humble courtship while
the obliged she half-shy half-willing by her cowering tail prepared
wings yet seemingly affrighted eyes and contracted neck lets one see
that she knows the barley-corn was not all he called her for 


 when he comes to that part of his narrative where he
 mentions of the proposing of the lady's maid hannah or one
 of the young sorlings to attend her thus he writes 

now belford canst thou imagine what i meant by proposing hannah or
one of the girls here for her attendant i'll give thee a month to
guess 

thou wilt not pretend to guess thou say'st 

well then i'll tell thee 

believing she would certainly propose to have that favourite wench about
her as soon as she was a little settled i had caused the girl to be
inquired after with an intent to make interest some how or other that
a month's warning should be insisted on by her master or mistress or by
some other means which i had not determined upon to prevent her coming
to her but fortune fights for me the wench is luckily ill a violent
rheumatic disorder which has obliged her to leave her place confines
her to her chamber poor hannah how i pity the girl these things are
very hard upon industrious servants i intend to make the poor wench a
small present on the occasion i know it will oblige my charmer 

and so jack pretending not to know any thing of the matter i pressed
her to send for hannah she knew i had always a regard for this servant 
because of her honest love to her lady but now i have greater regard
for her than ever calamity though a poor servant's calamity will
rather increase than diminish good will with a truly generous master or
mistress 

as to one of the young sorling's attendance there was nothing at all
in proposing that for if either of them had been chosen by her and
permitted by the mother  two chances in that   it would have been only
till i had fixed upon another and if afterwards they had been loth to
part i could easily have given my beloved to a jealousy which would
have done the business or to the girl who would have quitted her
country dairy such a relish for a london one and as would have made
it very convenient for her to fall in love with will or perhaps i could
have done still better for her with lord m s chaplain who is very
desirous of standing well with his lord's presumptive heir 

a blessing on thy honest heart lovelace thou'lt say for thou art for
providing for every body 


 he gives an account of the serious part of their
 conversation with no great variation from the lady's
 account of it and when he comes to that part of it where
 he bids her remember that reformation cannot be a sudden
 thing he asks his friend 

is not this fair play is it not dealing ingenuously then the
observation i will be bold to say is founded in truth and nature but
there was a little touch of policy in it besides that the lady if i
should fly out again should not think me too gross an hypocrite for 
as i plainly told her i was afraid that my fits of reformation were
but fits and sallies but i hoped her example would fix them into
habits but it is so discouraging a thing to have my monitress so
very good i protest i know not how to look up at her now as i am
thinking if i could pull her down a little nearer to my own level 
that is to say could prevail upon her to do something that would
argue imperfection something to repent of we should jog on much
more equally and be better able to comprehend one another and so the
comfort would be mutual and the remorse not all on one side 


 he acknowledges that he was greatly affected and pleased
 with the lady's serious arguments at the time but even then
 was apprehensive that his temper would not hold thus he
 writes 

this lady says serious things in so agreeable a manner and then her
voice is all harmony when she touches a subject she is pleased with 
that i could have listened to her for half a day together but yet i am
afraid if she falls as they call it she will lose a good deal of that
pathos of that noble self-confidence which gives a good person as i
now see a visible superiority over one not so good 

but after all belford i would fain know why people call such
free-livers as you and me hypocrites that's a word i hate and should
take it very ill to be called by it for myself i have as good motions 
and perhaps have them as frequently as any body all the business is 
they don't hold or to speak more in character i don't take the care
some do to conceal my lapses 




letter xxvii

miss howe to mis clarissa harlowe saturday april 15 


though pretty much pressed in time and oppressed by my mother's
watchfulness i will write a few lines upon the new light that has
broken in upon your gentleman and send it by a particular hand 

i know not what to think of him upon it he talks well but judge him
by rowe's lines he is certainly a dissembler odious as the sin of
hypocrisy and as he says that other of ingratitude are to him 

and pray my dear let me ask could he have triumphed as it is said
he has done over so many of our sex had he not been egregiously guilty
of both sins 

his ingenuousness is the thing that staggers me yet is he cunning
enough to know that whoever accuses him first blunts the edge of an
adversary's accusation 

he is certainly a man of sense there is more hope of such a one than a
fool and there must be a beginning to a reformation these i will allow
in his favour 

but this that follows i think is the only way to judge of his
specious confessions and self-accusations does he confess any thing
that you knew not before or that you are not likely to find out from
others if nothing else what does he confess to his own disadvantage 
you have heard of his duels you have heard of his seductions all
the world has he owns therefore what it would be to no purpose to
conceal and his ingenuousness is a salvo why this madam is no more
than mr lovelace himself acknowledges 

well but what is now to be done you must make the best of your
situation and as you say so he has proposed to you of windsor and his
canon's house his readiness to leave you and go himself in quest of
a lodging likewise looks well and i think there is nothing can be so
properly done as whether you get to a canon's house or not that the
canon should join you together in wedlock as soon as possible 

i much approve however of all your cautions of all your vigilance 
and of every thing you have done but of your meeting him yet in my
disapprobation of that i judge by that event only for who would have
divined it would have been concluded as it did but he is the devil by
his own account and had he run away with the wretched solmes and your
more wretched brother and himself been transported for life he should
have had my free consent for all three 

what use does he make of that joseph leman his ingenuousness i must
more than once say confounds me but if my dear you can forgive
your brother for the part he put that fellow upon acting i don't know
whether you ought to be angry at lovelace yet i have wished fifty
times since lovelace got you away that you were rid of him whether it
were by a burning fever by hanging by drowning or by a broken
neck provided it were before he laid you under a necessity to go into
mourning for him 

i repeat my hitherto rejected offer may i send it safely by your old
man i have reasons for not sending it by hickman's servant unless i
had a bank note inquiring for such may cause distrust my mother is so
busy so inquisitive i don't love suspicious tempers 

and here she is continually in and out i must break off 


 


mr hickman begs his most respectful compliments to you with offer of
his services i told him i would oblige him because minds in trouble
take kindly any body's civilities but that he was not to imagine that
he particularly obliged me by this since i should think the man or
woman either blind or stupid who admired not a person of your exalted
merit for your own sake and wished not to serve you without view to
other reward than the honour of serving you 

to be sure that was his principal motive with great daintiness he said
it but with a kiss of his hand and a bow to my feet he hoped that a
fine lady's being my friend did not lessen the merit of the reverence he
really had for her 

believe me ever what you my dear shall ever find me 

your faithful and affectionate anna howe 




letter xxviii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sat afternoon 


i detain your messenger while i write an answer to yours the poor old
man not being very well 

you dishearten me a good deal about mr lovelace i may be too willing
from my sad circumstances to think the best of him if his pretences
to reformation are but pretences what must be his intent but can the
heart of man be so very vile can he dare he mock the almighty but
i may not from one very sad reflection think better of him that i am
thrown too much into his power to make it necessary for him except
he were to intend the very utmost villany by me to be such a shocking
hypocrite he must at least be in earnest at the time he gives the
better hopes surely he must you yourself must join with me in this
hope or you could not wish me to be so dreadfully yoked 

but after all i had rather much rather be independent of him and of
his family although i have an high opinion of them at least till i see
what my own may be brought to otherwise i think it were best for me 
at once to cast myself into lady betty's protection all would then be
conducted with decency and perhaps many mortifications would be spared
me but then i must be his at all adventures and be thought to defy my
own family and shall i not first see the issue of one application and
yet i cannot make this till i am settled somewhere and at a distance
from him 

mrs sorlings shewed me a letter this morning which she had received
from her sister greme last night in which mrs greme hoping i would
forgive her forward zeal if her sister thinks fit to shew her letter to
me wishes and that for all the noble family's sake and she hopes she
may say for my own that i will be pleased to yield to make his honour 
as she calls him happy  she grounds her officiousness as she calls
it upon what he was so condescending  her word also  to say to her
yesterday in his way to windsor on her presuming to ask if she might
soon give him joy that no man ever loved a woman as he loves me that
no woman ever so well deserved to be beloved that he loves me with such
a purity as he had never believed himself capable of or that a mortal
creature could have inspired him with looking upon me as all soul as
an angel sent down to save his  and a great deal more of this sort 
but that he apprehends my consent to make him happy is at a greater
distance than he wishes and complained of too severe restrictions i
had laid upon him before i honoured him with my confidence which
restrictions must be as sacred to him as if they were parts of the
marriage contract  etc 

what my dear shall i say to this how shall i take it mrs greme is
a good woman mrs sorlings is a good woman and this letter agrees with
the conversation between mr lovelace and me which i thought and
still think so agreeable yet what means the man by foregoing the
opportunities he has had to declare himself what mean his complaints
of my restrictions to mrs greme he is not a bashful man but you say 
i inspire people with an awe of me an awe my dear as how 


 this letter mrs greme with no bad design on her part was put upon
writing by mr lovelace himself as will be seen in letter xxxv 


i am quite petulant fretful and peevish with myself at times to
find that i am bound to see the workings of the subtle or this giddy
spirit which shall i call it 

how am i punished as i frequently think for my vanity in hoping to
be an example to young persons of my sex let me be but a warning and i
will now be contented for be my destiny what it may i shall never
be able to hold up my head again among my best friends and worthiest
companions 

it is one of the cruelest circumstances that attends the faults of the
inconsiderate that she makes all who love her unhappy and gives joy
only to her own enemies and to the enemies of her family 

what an useful lesson would this afford were it properly inculcated at
the time that the tempted mind was balancing upon a doubtful adventure 

you know not my dear the worth of a virtuous man and noble-minded as
you are in most particulars you partake of the common weakness of human
nature in being apt to slight what is in your own power 

you would not think of using mr lovelace were he your suitor as you
do the much worthier mr hickman would you you know who says in
my mother's case much will bear much shall bear all the world
through  mr hickman i fancy would be glad to know the lady's name 
who made such an observation he would think it hardly possible but
such a one should benefit by her own remark and would be apt to wish
his miss howe acquainted with her 


 see vol i letter x 


gentleness of heart surely is not despicable in a man why if it be 
is the highest distinction a man can arrive at that of a gentleman a
distinction which a prince may not deserve for manners more than
birth fortune or title are requisite in this character manners are
indeed the essence of it and shall it be generally said and miss howe
not be an exception to it as you once wrote that our sex are best
dealt with by boisterous and unruly spirits 


 see vol ii letter iii 


forgive me my dear and love me as you used to do for although my
fortunes are changed my heart is not nor ever will while it bids my
pen tell you that it must cease to bear when it is not as much yours
as

your cl harlowe 




letter xxix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe saturday evening 

mr lovelace has seen divers apartments at windsor but not one he
says that he thought fit for me and which at the same time answered
my description 

he has been very solicitous to keep to the letter of my instructions 
which looked well and the better i like him as although he proposed
that town he came back dissuading me from it for he said that in
his journey from thence he had thought windsor although of his own
proposal a wrong choice because i coveted privacy and that was a
place generally visited and admired 


 this inference of the lady in his favour is exactly what he had hoped
for see letter xxv of this volume 


i told him that if mrs sorlings thought me not an incumbrance i would
be willing to stay here a little longer provided he would leave me and
go to lord m s or to london which ever he thought best 

he hoped he said that he might suppose me absolutely safe from the
insults or attempts of my brother and therefore if it should make me
easier he would obey for a few days at least 

he again proposed to send for hannah i told him i designed to do
so through you and shall i beg of you my dear to cause the honest
creature to be sent to your faithful robert i think knows where
she is perhaps she will be permitted to quit her place directly by
allowing a month's wages which i will repay her he took notice of the
serious humour he found me in and of the redness of my eyes i had just
been answering your letter and had he not approached me on his
coming off his journey in a very respectful manner had he not made an
unexceptionable report of his inquiries and been so ready to go from
me at the very first word i was prepared notwithstanding the good
terms we parted upon when he set out for windsor to have given him a
very unwelcome reception for the contents of your last letter had so
affected me that the moment i saw him i beheld with indignation the
seducer who had been the cause of all the evils i suffer and have
suffered 

he hinted to me that he had received a letter from lady betty and
another as i understood him from one of the miss montagues if they
take notice of me in them i wonder that he did not acquaint me with the
contents i am afraid my dear that his relations are among those who
think i have taken a rash and inexcusable step it is not to my credit
to let even them know how i have been frighted out of myself and yet
perhaps they would hold me unworthy of their alliance if they were to
think my flight a voluntary one o my dear how uneasy to us are our
reflections upon every doubtful occurrence when we know we have been
prevailed upon to do a wrong thing 


sunday morning 

ah this man my dear we have had warmer dialogues than ever yet we
have had at fair argument i find i need not fear him but he is such
a wild such an ungovernable creature  he reformed   that i am half
afraid of him 


 see this confirmed by mr lovelace letter xi of this volume 


he again on my declaring myself uneasy at his stay with me here 
proposed that i would put myself into lady betty's protection assuring
me that he thought he could not leave me at mrs sorlings's with safety
to myself and upon my declining to do that for the reasons i gave you
in my last he urged me to make a demand of my estate 


 see letter xxviii of this volume 


he knew it i told him to be my resolution not to litigate with my
father 

nor would he put me upon it he replied but as the last thing but
if my spirit would not permit me to be obliged as i called it to any
body and yet if my relations would refuse me my own he knew not how
i could keep up that spirit without being put to inconveniences 
which would give him infinite concern unless unless unless he said 
hesitating as if afraid to speak out unless i would take the only
method i could take to obtain the possession of my own 

what is that sir 

sure the man saw by my looks when he came with his creeping unless's 
that i guessed what he meant 

ah madam can you be at a loss to know what that method is they will
not dispute with a man that right which they contest with you 

why said he with a man instead of with him yet he looked as if he
wanted to be encouraged to say more 

so sir you would have me employ a lawyer would you notwithstanding
what i have ever declared as to litigating with my father 

no i would not my dearest creature snatching my hand and pressing it
with his lips except you would make me the lawyer 

had he said me at first i should have been above the affectation of
mentioning a lawyer 

i blushed the man pursued not the subject so ardently but that it was
more easy as well as more natural to avoid it than to fall into it 

would to heaven he might without offending but i so over-awed
him  over-awed him your notion my dear   and so the over-awed 
bashful man went off from the subject repeating his proposal that i
would demand my own estate or empower some man of the law to demand it 
if i would not  he put in  empower a happier man to demand it but it
could not be amiss he thought to acquaint my two trustees that i
intended to assume it 


 see letter xix of this volume 

i should know better what to do i told him when he was at a distance
from me and known to be so i suppose sir that if my father propose
my return and engage never to mention solmes to me nor any other man 
but by my consent and i agree upon that condition to think no more of
you you will acquiesce 

i was willing to try whether he had the regard to all of my previous
declarations which he pretended to have to some of them 

he was struck all of a heap 

what say you mr lovelace you know all you mean is for my good 
surely i am my own mistress surely i need not ask your leave to make
what terms i please for myself so long as i break none with you 

he hemm'd twice or thrice why madam why madam i cannot say then
pausing and rising from his seat with petulance i see plainly enough 
said he the reason why none of my proposals can be accepted at last i
am to be a sacrifice to your reconciliation with your implacable family 

it has always been your respectful way mr lovelace to treat my family
in this free manner but pray sir when you call others implacable see
that you deserve not the same censure yourself 

he must needs say there was no love lost between some of my family and
him but he had not deserved of them what they had of him 

yourself being judge i suppose sir 

all the world you yourself madam being judge 

then sir let me tell you had you been less upon your defiances 
they would not have been irritated so much against you but nobody ever
heard that avowed despite to the relations of a person was a proper
courtship either to that person or to her friends 

well madam all that i know is that their malice against me is such 
that if you determine to sacrifice me you may be reconciled when you
please 

and all i know sir is that if i do give my father the power of a
negative and he will be contented with that it will be but my duty to
give it him and if i preserve one to myself i shall break through no
obligation to you 

your duty to your capricious brother not to your father you mean 
madam 

if the dispute lay between my brother and me at first surely sir a
father may choose which party he will take 

he may madam but that exempts him not from blame for all that if he
take the wrong 

different people will judge differently mr lovelace of the right and
the wrong you judge as you please shall not others as they please and
who has a right to controul a father's judgment in his own family and
in relation to his own child 

i know madam there is no arguing with you but nevertheless i had
hoped to have made myself some little merit with you so as that i might
not have been the preliminary sacrifice to a reconciliation 

your hope sir had been better grounded if you had had my consent to my
abandoning of my father's house 

always madam and for ever to be reminded of the choice you would have
made of that damn'd solmes rather than 

not so hasty not so rash mr lovelace i am convinced that there was
no intention to marry me to that solmes on wednesday 

so i am told they now give out in order to justify themselves at your
expense every body living madam is obliged to you for your kind
thoughts but i 

excuse me good mr lovelace  waving my hand and bowing  that i am
willing to think the best of my father 

charming creature said he with what a bewitching air is that
said and with a vehemence in his manner would have snatched my hand 
but i withdrew it being much offended with him 

i think madam my sufferings for your sake might have entitled me to
some favour 

my sufferings sir for your impetuous temper set against your
sufferings for my sake i humbly conceive leave me very little your
debtor 

lord madam  assuming a drawling air  what have you suffered nothing
but what you can easily forgive you have been only made a prisoner in
your father's house by way of doing credit to your judgment you have
only had an innocent and faithful servant turned out of your service 
because you loved her you have only had your sister's confident
servant set over you with leave to tease and affront you 

very well sir 

you have only had an insolent brother take upon him to treat you like a
slave and as insolent a sister to undermine you in every body's favour 
on pretence to keep you out of hands which if as vile as they vilely
report are not however half so vile and cruel as their own 

go on sir if you please 

you have only been persecuted in order to oblige you to have a sordid
fellow whom you have professed to hate and whom every body despises 
the license has been only got the parson has only been had in
readiness the day a near a very near day had been only fixed and
you were only to be searched for your correspondencies and still closer
confined till the day came in order to deprive you of all means of
escaping the snare laid for you but all this you can forgive you
can wish you had stood all this inevitable as the compulsion must have
been and the man who at the hazard of his life had delivered you
from all these mortifications is the only person you cannot forgive 

can't you go on sir you see i have patience to hear you can't you go
on sir 

i can madam with my sufferings which i confess ought not to be
mentioned were i at last to be rewarded in the manner i hoped 

your sufferings then if you please sir 

affrontingly forbidden your father's house after encouragement given 
without any reasons they knew not before to justify the prohibition 
forced upon a rencounter i wished to avoid the first i ever so
provoked wished to avoid and that because the wretch was your
brother 

wretch sir and my brother this could be from no man breathing but
from him before me 

pardon me madam but oh how unworthy to be your brother the quarrel
grafted upon an old one when at college he universally known to be the
aggressor and revived for views equally sordid and injurious both to
yourself and me giving life to him who would have taken away mine 

your generosity this sir not your sufferings a little more of your
sufferings if you please i hope you do not repent that you did not
murder my brother 

my private life hunted into my morals decried some of the accusers not
unfaulty 

that's an aspersion sir 

spies set upon my conduct one hired to bribe my own servant's fidelity 
perhaps to have poisoned me at last if the honest fellow had not 

facts mr lovelace do you want facts in the display of your
sufferings none of your perhaps's i beseech you 

menaces every day and defiances put into every one's mouth against me 
forced to creep about in disguises and to watch all hours 

and in all weathers i suppose sir that i remember was once your
grievance in all weathers sir and all these hardships arising from
yourself not imposed by me 


 see letter vi of this volume 


like a thief or an eaves-dropper proceeded he and yet neither by
birth nor alliances unworthy of their relation whatever i may be and
am of their admirable daughter of whom they every one of them are at
least as unworthy these madam i call sufferings justly call so if
at last i am to be sacrificed to an imperfect reconciliation imperfect 
i say for can you expect to live so much as tolerably under the same
roof after all that has passed with that brother and sister 

o sir sir what sufferings have yours been and all for my sake i
warrant i can never reward you for them never think of me more i
beseech you how can you have patience with me nothing has been
owing to your own behaviour i presume nothing to your defiances for
defiances nothing to your resolution declared more than once that you
would be related to a family which nevertheless you would not stoop
to ask a relation of nothing in short to courses which every body
blamed you for you not thinking it worth your while to justify
yourself had i not thought you used in an ungentlemanly manner as i
have heretofore told you you had not had my notice by pen and ink 
that notice gave you a supposed security and you generously defied
my friends the more for it and this brought upon me perhaps not
undeservedly my father's displeasure without which my brother's
private pique and selfish views would have wanted a foundation to
build upon so that for all that followed of my treatment and your
redundant only's i might thank you principally as you may yourself for
all your sufferings your mighty sufferings and if voluble sir you
have founded any merit upon them be so good as to revoke it and
look upon me with my forfeited reputation as the only sufferer for
what pray hear me out sir  for he was going to speak  have you
suffered in but your pride your reputation could not suffer that
it was beneath you to be solicitous about and had you not been an
unmanageable man i should not have been driven to the extremity i now
every hour as the hour passes deplore with this additional reflection
upon myself that i ought not to have begun or having begun not
continued a correspondence with one who thought it not worth his while
to clear his own character for my sake or to submit to my father for
his own in a point wherein every father ought to have an option 


 see letter vi of this volume 


darkness light light darkness by my soul just as you please to
have it o charmer of my heart snatching my hand and pressing it
between both of his to his lips in a strange wild way take me take
me to yourself mould me as you please i am wax in your hands give me
your own impression and seal me for ever yours we were born for each
other you to make me happy and save a soul i am all error all
crime i see what i ought to have done but do you think madam i can
willingly consent to be sacrificed to a partial reconciliation in
which i shall be so great so irreparable a sufferer any thing but
that include me in your terms prescribe to me promise for me as you
please put a halter about my neck and lead me by it upon condition
of forgiveness on that disgraceful penance and of a prostration as
servile to your father's presence your brother absent and i will
beg his consent at his feet and bear any thing but spurning from him 
because he is your father but to give you up upon cold conditions 
d n me  said the shocking wretch  if i either will or can 

these were his words as near as i can remember them for his behaviour
was so strangely wild and fervent that i was perfectly frighted i
thought he would have devoured my hand i wished myself a thousand miles
distant from him 

i told him i by no means approved of his violent temper he was too
boisterous a man for my liking i saw now by the conversation that had
passed what was his boasted regard to my injunctions and should
take my measures accordingly as he should soon find and with a half
frighted earnestness i desired him to withdraw and leave me to myself 

he obeyed and that with extreme complaisance in his manner but
with his complexion greatly heightened and a countenance as greatly
dissatisfied 

but on recollecting all that passed i plainly see that he means not 
if he can help it to leave me to the liberty of refusing him which i
had nevertheless preserved a right to do but looks upon me as his by a
strange sort of obligation for having run away with me against my will 

yet you see he but touches upon the edges of matrimony neither and
that at a time generally when he has either excited one's passions
or apprehensions so that one cannot at once descend but surely this
cannot be his design and yet such seemed to be his behaviour to my
sister when he provoked her to refuse him and so tamely submitted as
he did to her refusal but he dare not what can one say of so various
a man i am now again out of conceit with him i wish i were fairly out
of his power 


 see vol i letters ii and iii 


he has sent up three times to beg admittance in the two last with
unusual earnestness but i have sent him word i will finish what i am
about 

what to do about going from this place i cannot tell i could stay
here with all my heart as i have said to him the gentlewoman and her
daughters are desirous that i will although not very convenient for
them i believe neither but i see he will not leave me while i do so
i must remove somewhere 

i have long been sick of myself and now i am more and more so but
let me not lose your good opinion if i do that loss will complete the
misfortunes of

your cl harlowe 




letter xxx

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe sunday night april 16 


i may send to you although you are forbid to write to me may i
not for that is not a correspondence is it where letters are not
answered 

i am strangely at a loss what to think of this man he is a perfect
proteus i can but write according to the shape he assumes at the time 
don't think me the changeable person i beseech you if in one letter i
contradict what i wrote in another nay if i seem to contradict what
i said in the same letter for he is a perfect camelion or rather more
variable than the camelion for that it is said cannot assume the
red and the white but this man can and though black seems to be
his natural colour yet has he taken great pains to make me think him
nothing but white 

but you shall judge of him as i proceed only if i any where appear
to you to be credulous i beg you to set me right for you are a
stander-by as you say in a former would to heaven i were not to play 
for i think after all i am held to a desperate game 


 see letter viii of this volume 


before i could finish my last to you he sent up twice more to beg
admittance i returned for answer that i would see him at my own time 
i would neither be invaded nor prescribed to 

considering how we parted and my delaying his audience as he sometimes
calls it i expected him to be in no very good humour when i admitted
of his visit and by what i wrote you will conclude that i was not yet
mine soon changed when i saw his extreme humility at his entrance and
heard what he had to say 

i have a letter madam said he from lady betty lawrance and another
from my cousin charlotte but of these more by-and-by i came now to
make my humble acknowledgement to you upon the arguments that passed
between us so lately 

i was silent wondering what he was driving at 

i am a most unhappy creature proceeded he unhappy from a strange
impatiency of spirit which i cannot conquer it always brings upon me
deserved humiliation but it is more laudable to acknowledge than to
persevere when under the power of conviction 

i was still silent 

i have been considering what you proposed to me madam that i should
acquiesce with such terms as you should think proper to comply with in
order to a reconciliation with your friends 

well sir 

and i find all just all right on your side and all impatience all
inconsideration on mine 

i stared you may suppose whence this change sir and so soon 

i am so much convinced that you must be in the right in all you think
fit to insist upon that i shall for the future mistrust myself and 
if it be possible whenever i differ with you take an hour's time for
recollection before i give way to that vehemence which an opposition 
to which i have not been accustomed too often gives me 

all this is mighty good sir but to what does it tend 

why madam when i came to consider what you had proposed as to the
terms of reconciliation with your friends and when i recollected that
you had always referred to yourself to approve or reject me according
to my merits or demerits i plainly saw that it was rather a
condescension in you that you were pleased to ask my consent to those
terms than that you were imposing a new law and i now madam beg your
pardon for my impatience whatever terms you think proper to come into
with your relations which will enable you to honour me with the
conditional effect of your promise to me to these be pleased to
consent and if i lose you insupportable as that thought is to me yet 
as it must be by my own fault i ought to thank myself for
it 

what think you miss howe do you believe he can have any view in
this i cannot see any he could have and i thought it best as he put
it in so right a manner to appear not to doubt the sincerity of his
confession and to accept of it as sincere 

he then read to me part of lady betty's letter turning down the
beginning which was a little too severe upon him he said for my eye 
and i believe by the style the remainder of it was in a corrective
strain 

it was too plain i told him that he must have great faults that none
of his relations could write to him but with a mingled censure for some
bad action 

and it is as plain my dearest creature said he that you who know
not of any such faults but by surmise are equally ready to condemn
me will not charity allow you to infer that their charges are no
better grounded and that my principal fault has been carelessness of
my character and too little solicitude to clear myself when aspersed 
which i do assure you is the case 

lady betty in her letter expresses herself in the most obliging manner
in relation to me she wishes him so to behave as to encourage me to
make him soon happy she desires her compliments to me and expresses
her impatience to see as her niece so celebrated a lady  those are her
high words  she shall take it for an honour she says to be put into
a way to oblige me she hopes i will not too long delay the ceremony 
because that performed will be to her and to lord m and lady sarah a
sure pledge of her nephew's merits and good behaviour 

she says she was always sorry to hear of the hardships i had met with
on his account that he will be the most ungrateful of men if he make it
not all up to me and that she thinks it incumbent upon all their family
to supply to me the lost favour of my own and for her part nothing of
that kind she bids him assure me shall be wanting 

her ladyship observes that the treatment he had received from my
family would have been much more unaccountable than it was with such
natural and accidental advantages as he had had it not been owing
to his own careless manners but she hopes that he will convince the
harlowe family that they had thought worse of him than he had deserved 
since now it was in his power to establish his character for ever this
she prays to god to enable him to do as well for his own honour as for
the honour of their house  was the magnificent word 

she concludes with desiring to be informed of our nuptials the moment
they are celebrated that she may be with the earliest in felicitating
me on the happy occasion 

but her ladyship gives me no direct invitation to attend her before the
marriage which i might have expected from what he had told me 

he then shewed me part of miss montague's more sprightly letter 
congratulating him upon the honour he had obtained of the confidence
of so admirable a lady  these are her words confidence my dear 
nobody indeed as you say will believe otherwise were they to be
told the truth and you see that miss montague and all his family i
suppose think that the step i have taken an extraordinary one she
also wishes for his speedy nuptials and to see her new cousin at m 
hall as do lord m she tells him and her sister and in general all
the well-wishers of their family 

whenever this happy day shall be passed she proposes she says to
attend me and to make one in my train to m hall if his lordship shall
continue as ill of the gout as he is at present but that should he get
better he will himself attend me she is sure and conduct me thither 
and afterwards quit either of his three seats to us till we shall be
settled to our mind 

this young lady says nothing in excuse for not meeting me on the road 
or st alban's as he had made me expect she would yet mentions her
having been indisposed mr lovelace had also told me that lord m was
ill of the gout which miss montague's letter confirms 

but why did not the man show me these letters last night was he afraid
of giving me too much pleasure 




letter xxxi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


you may believe my dear that these letters put me in good humour with
him he saw it in my countenance and congratulated himself upon it 
yet i cannot but repeat my wonder that i could not have the contents of
them communicated to me last night 


 the reader will see how miss howe accounts for this in letter xxxv 


he then urged me to go directly to lady betty's on the strength of her
letter 

but how said i can i do that were i even out of all hope of a
reconciliation with my friends which yet however unlikely to be
effected is my duty to attempt as her ladyship has given me no
particular invitation 

that he was sure was owing to her doubt that it would be
accepted else she had done it with the greatest pleasure in the world 

that doubt itself i said was enough to deter me since her ladyship 
who knew so well the boundaries to the fit and the unfit by her not
expecting i would accept of the invitation had she given it would have
reason to think me very forward if i had accepted it and much more
forward to go without it then said i i thank you sir i have no
clothes fit to go any where or to be seen by any body 

o i was fit to appear in the drawing-room were full dress and
jewels to be excused and should make the most amiable  he must mean
extraordinary  figure there he was astonished at the elegance of my
dress by what art he knew not but i appeared to such advantage as if
i had a different suit every day 

besides his cousins montague would supply me with all i wanted for the
present and he would write to miss charlotte accordingly if i would
give him leave 

do you think me the jay in the fable said i would you have me visit
the owners of the borrowed dresses in their own clothes surely mr 
lovelace you think i have either a very low or a very confident mind 

would i choose to go to london for a very few days only in order to
furnish myself with clothes 

not at your expense sir said i in an angry tone 

i could not have appeared in earnest to him in my displeasure at his
artful contrivances to get me away if i were not occasionally to shew
my real fretfulness upon the destitute condition to which he has reduced
me when people set out wrong together it is very difficult to avoid
recriminations 

he wished he knew but my mind that should direct him in his proposals 
and it would be his delight to observe it whatever it were 

my mind is that you sir should leave me out of hand how often must i
tell you so 

if i were any where but here he would obey me he said if i insisted
upon it but if i would assert my right that would be infinitely
preferable in his opinion to any other measure but one which he durst
only hint at for then admitting his visits or refusing them as i
pleased granting a correspondence by letter only it would appear
to all the world that what i had done was but in order to do myself
justice 

how often mr lovelace must i repeat that i will not litigate with my
father do you think that my unhappy circumstances will alter my notions
of my own duty so far as i shall be enabled to perform it how can i
obtain possession without litigation and but by my trustees one of
them will be against me the other is abroad then the remedy proposed
by this measure were i disposed to fall in with it will require time
to bring it into effect and what i want is present independence and
your immediate absence 

upon his soul the wretch swore he did not think it safe for the
reasons he had before given to leave me here he wished i would think
of some place to which i should like to go but he must take
the liberty to say that he hoped his behaviour had not been so
exceptionable as to make me so very earnest for his absence in the
interim and the less surely as i was almost eternally shutting up
myself from him although he presumed to assure me that he never went
from me but with a corrected heart and with strengthened resolutions
of improving by my example 

externally shutting myself up from you repeated i i hope sir that
you will not pretend to take it amiss that i expect to be uninvaded in
my retirements i hope you do not think me so weak a creature novice as
you have found me in a very capital instance as to be fond of occasions
to hear your fond speeches especially as no differing circumstances
require your over-frequent visits nor that i am to be addressed to as
if i thought hourly professions needful to assure me of your honour 

he seemed a little disconcerted 

you know mr lovelace proceeded i why i am so earnest for your
absence it is that i may appear to the world independent of you and
in hopes by that means to find it less difficult to set on foot a
reconciliation with my friends and now let me add in order to make
you easier as to the terms of that hoped-for reconciliation that since
i find i have the good fortune to stand so well with your relations i
will from time to time acquaint you by letter when you are absent 
with every step i shall take and with every overture that shall be made
to me but not with an intention to render myself accountable to you 
neither as to my acceptance or non-acceptance of those overtures they
know that i have a power given me by my grandfather's will to bequeath
the estate he left me with other of his bounties in a way that may
affect them though not absolutely from them this consideration i
hope will procure me some from them when their passion subsides and
when they know i am independent of you 

charming reasoning and let him tell me that the assurance i had
given him was all he wished for it was more than he could ask what a
happiness to have a woman of honour and generosity to depend upon had
he on his first entrance into the world met with such a one he had
never been other than a man of strict virtue but all he hoped 
was for the best since in that case he had never perhaps had the
happiness he now had in view because his relations had always been
urging him to marry and that before he had the honour to know me and
now as he had not been so bad as some people's malice reported him to
be he hoped he should have near as much merit in his repentance as
if he had never erred a fine rakish notion and hope and too much
encouraged i doubt my dear by the generality of our sex 

this brought on a more serious question or two you'll see by it what a
creature an unmortified libertine is 

i asked him if he knew what he had said alluded to a sentence in the
best of books that there was more joy in heaven 

he took the words out of my mouth 

over one sinner that repenteth than over ninety-and-nine just persons 
which need no repentance were his words 


 luke xv 7 the parable is concerning the ninety-nine sheep not the
prodigal son as mr lovelace erroneously imagines 


yes madam i thought of it as soon as i said it but not before i
have read the story of the prodigal son i'll assure you and one day 
when i am settled as i hope to be will write a dramatic piece on the
subject i have at times had it in my head and you will be too ready 
perhaps to allow me to be qualified fro it 

you so lately sir stumbled at a word with which you must be better
acquainted ere you can be thoroughly master of such a subject that i
am amazed you should know any thing of the scripture and be so ignorant
of that 


 see letter xxiv of this volume 


o madam i have read the bible as a fine piece of ancient history but
as i hope to be saved it has for some years past made me so uneasy 
when i have popped upon some passages in it that i have been forced to
run to music or company to divert myself 

poor wretch lifting up my hands and eyes 

the denunciations come so slap-dash upon one so unceremoniously as i
may say without even the by-your-leave of a rude london chairman that
they overturn one horse and man as st paul was overturned there's
another scripture allusion madam the light in short as his was is
too glaring to be borne 

o sir do you want to be complimented into repentance and salvation 
but pray mr lovelace do you mean any thing at all when you swear so
often as you do by your soul or bind an asseveration with the words 
as you hope to be saved 

o my beloved creature shifting his seat let us call another cause 

why sir don't i neither use ceremony enough with you 

dearest madam forbear for the present i am but in my noviciate your
foundation must be laid brick by brick you'll hinder the progress of
the good work you would promote if you tumble in a whole wagon-load at
once upon me 

lord bless me thought i what a character is that of a libertine 
what a creature am i who have risked what i have risked with such a
one what a task before me if my hopes continue of reforming such a
wild indian as this nay worse than a wild indian for a man who errs
with his eyes open and against conviction is a thousand times worse
for what he knows and much harder to be reclaimed than if he had never
known any thing at all 

i was equally shocked at him and concerned for him and having laid so
few bricks to speak to his allusion and those so ill-cemented i was
as willing as the gay and inconsiderate to call another cause as he
termed it another cause too more immediately pressing upon me from
my uncertain situation 

i said i took it for granted that he assented to the reasoning he
seemed to approve and would leave me and then i asked him what he
really and in his most deliberate mind would advise me to in my
present situation he must needs see i said that i was at a great loss
what to resolve upon entirely a stranger to london having no adviser 
no protector at present himself he must give me leave to tell
him greatly deficient in practice if not in the knowledge of those
decorums which i had supposed were always to be found in a man of
birth fortune and education 

he imagines himself i find to be a very polite man and cannot bear to
be thought otherwise he put up his lip i am sorry for it madam a man
of breeding a man of politeness give me leave to say  colouring   is
much more of a black swan with you than with any lady i ever met with 

then that is your misfortune mr lovelace as well as mine at present 
every woman of discernment i am confident knowing what i know of you
now would as i say  i had a mind to mortify a pride that i am sure
deserves to be mortified   that your politeness is not regular nor
constant it is not habit it is too much seen by fits and starts and
sallies and those not spontaneous you must be reminded into them 

o lord o lord poor i was the light yet the half-angry wretch's
self-pitying expression 

i proceeded upon my word sir you are not the accomplished man which
your talents and opportunities would have led one to expect you to be 
you are indeed in your noviciate as to every laudable attainment 




letter xxxii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe  in continuation  


as this subject was introduced by himself and treated so lightly by
him i was going on to tell him more of my mind but he interrupted
me dear dear madam spare me i am sorry that i have lived to this
hour for nothing at all but surely you could not have quitted a subject
so much more agreeable and so much more suitable i will say to your
present situation if you had not too cruel a pleasure in mortifying a
man who the less needed to be mortified as he before looked up to you
with a diffidence in his own merits too great to permit him to speak
half of his mind to you be pleased but to return to the subject we were
upon and at another time i will gladly embrace correction from the only
lips in the world so qualified to give it 

you talk of reformation sometimes mr lovelace and in so talking 
acknowledge errors but i see you can very ill bear the reproof for
which perhaps you are not solicitous to avoid giving occasion far be it
from me to take delight in finding fault i should be glad for both our
sakes since my situation is what it is that i could do nothing but
praise you but failures which affect a mind that need not be very
delicate to be affected by them are too grating to be passed over in
silence by a person who wishes to be thought in earnest in her own duties 

i admire your delicacy madam again interrupted he although i suffer
by it yet would i not have it otherwise indeed i would not when i
consider of it it is an angelic delicacy which sets you above all our
sex and even above your own it is natural to you madam so you may
think it extraordinary but there is nothing like it on earth said the
flatterer what company has he kept 

but let us return to the former subject you were so good as to ask me
what i would advise you to do i want but to make you easy i want but
to see you fixed to your liking your faithful hannah with you your
reconciliation with those to whom you wish to be reconciled set
on foot and in a train and now let me mention to you different
expedients in hopes that some one of them may be acceptable to you 

i will go to mrs howe or to miss howe or to whomsoever you would
have me to go and endeavour to prevail upon them to receive you 


 the reader perhaps need not be reminded that he had taken care from
the first see vol i letter xxxi to deprive her of any protection
from mrs howe see in his next letter a repeated account of the same
artifices and his exultations upon his inventions to impose upon the
two such watchful ladies as clarissa and miss howe 


do you incline to go to florence to your cousin morden i will furnish
you with an opportunity of going thither either by sea to leghorn 
or by land through france perhaps i may be able to procure one of
the ladies of my family to attend you either charlotte or patty would
rejoice in such an opportunity of seeing france and italy as for
myself i will only be your escort in disguise if you will have it so 
even in your livery that your punctilio may not receive offence by my
attendance 

i told him i would consider of all he had said but that i hoped for a
line or two from my aunt hervey if not from my sister to both of
whom i had written which if i were to be so favoured might help to
determine me mean time if he would withdraw i would particularly
consider of this proposal of his in relation to my cousin morden and
if it held its weight with me so far as to write for your opinion upon
it he should know my mind in an hour's time 

he withdrew with great respect and in an hour's time returned and i
then told him it was unnecessary to trouble you for your opinion about
it my cousin morden was soon expected if he were not i could not
admit him to accompany me to him upon any condition it was highly
improbable that i should obtain the favour of either of his cousins'
company and if that could be brought about it would be the same thing
in the world's eye as if he went himself 

this led us into another conversation which shall be the subject of my
next 




letter xxxiii

miss clarissa harlowe  in continuation  


mr lovelace told me that on the supposition that his proposal in
relation to my cousin morden might not be accepted he had been studying
to find out if possible some other expedient that might be agreeable 
in order to convince me that he preferred my satisfaction to his own 

he then offered to go himself and procure my hannah to come and
attend me as i had declined the service of either of the young misses
sorlings he was extremely solicitous he said that i should have a
servant in whose integrity i might confide 

i told him that you would be so kind as to send to engage hannah if
possible 

if any thing he said should prevent hannah from coming suppose he
himself waited upon miss howe to desire her to lend me her servant till
i was provided to my mind 

i said your mother's high displeasure at the step i had taken as she
supposed voluntarily had deprived me of an open assistance of that
sort from you 

he was amazed so much as mrs howe herself used to admire me and so
great an influence as miss howe was supposed and deserved to have
over her mother that mrs howe should take upon herself to be so much
offended with me he wished that the man who took such pains to keep up
and enflame the passions of my father and uncles were not at the bottom
of this mischief too 

i was afraid i said that my brother was or else my uncle antony i
dared to say would not have taken such pains to set mrs howe against
me as i understood he had done 

since i had declined visiting lady sarah and lady betty he asked me 
if i should admit of a visit from his cousin montague and accept of a
servant of hers for the present 

that was not i said an acceptable proposal but i would first see if
my friends would send me my clothes that i might not make such a giddy
and runaway appearance to any of his relations 

if i pleased he would take another journey to windsor to make a more
particular inquiry amongst the canons or in any worthy family 

were not his objections as to the publicness of the place i asked him 
as strong now as before 

i remember my dear in one of your former letters you mentioned london
as the most private place to be in and i said that since he made such
pretences against leaving me here as shewed he had no intention to do
so and since he engaged to go from me and leave me to pursue my
own measures if i were elsewhere and since his presence made these
lodgings inconvenient to me i should not be disinclined to go to
london did i know any body there 


 see vol ii letter xxxvii 


as he had several times proposed london to me i expected that he would
eagerly have embraced that motion from me but he took not ready hold of
it yet i thought his eye approved of it 

we are both great watchers of each other's eyes and indeed seem to be
more than half afraid of each other 

he then made a grateful proposal to me that i would send for my norton
to attend me  


 the reader is referred to mr lovelace's next letter for his motives
in making the several proposals of which the lady is willing to think so
well 


he saw by my eyes he said that he had at last been happy in an
expedient which would answer the wishes of us both why says he did
i not think of it before and snatching my hand shall i write madam 
shall i send shall i go and fetch the worthy woman myself 

after a little consideration i told him that this was indeed a grateful
motion but that i apprehended it would put her to a difficulty which
she would not be able to get over as it would make a woman of her known
prudence appear to countenance a fugitive daughter in opposition to
her parents and as her coming to me would deprive her of my mother's
favour without its being in my power to make it up to her 

o my beloved creature said he generously enough let not this be
an obstacle i will do every thing for mrs norton you wish to have
done let me go for her 

more coolly than perhaps his generosity deserved i told him it was
impossible but i must soon hear from my friends i should not mean
time embroil any body with them not mrs norton especially from whose
interest in and mediation with my mother i might expect some good 
were she to keep herself in a neutral state that besides the good
woman had a mind above her fortune and would sooner want than be
beholden to any body improperly 

improperly said he have not persons of merit a right to all the
benefits conferred upon them mrs norton is so good a woman that i
shall think she lays me under an obligation if she will put it in my
power to serve her although she were not to augment it by giving me
the opportunity at the same time of contributing to your pleasure and
satisfaction 

how could this man with such powers of right thinking be so far
depraved by evil habits as to disgrace his talents by wrong acting 

is there not room after all thought i at the time to hope as he so
lately led me to hope that the example it will behove me for both
our sakes to endeavour to set him may influence him to a change of
manners in which both may find our account 

give me leave sir said i to tell you there is a strange mixture in
your mind you must have taken pains to suppress many good motions
and reflections as they arose or levity must have been surprisingly
predominant in it but as to the subject we were upon there is no
taking any resolutions till i hear from my friends 

well madam i can only say i would find out some expedient if i
could that should be agreeable to you but since i cannot will you be
so good as to tell me what you would wish to have done nothing in the
world but i will comply with excepting leaving you here at such a
distance from the place i shall be in if any thing should happen and
in a place where my gossiping rascals have made me in a manner public 
for want of proper cautions at first 

these vermin added he have a pride they can hardly rein-in when
they serve a man of family they boast of their master's pedigree and
descent as if they were related to him nor is any thing they know of
him or of his affairs a secret to one another were it a matter that
would hang him 

if so thought i men of family should take care to give them subjects
worth boasting of 

i am quite at a loss said i what to do or where to go would you mr 
lovelace in earnest advise me to think of going to london 

and i looked at him with stedfastness but nothing could i gather from
his looks 

at first madam said he i was for proposing london as i was then more
apprehensive of pursuit but as your relations seem cooler on that head 
i am the more indifferent about the place you go to so as you are
pleased so as you are easy i shall be happy 

this indifference of his to london i cannot but say made me incline
the more to go thither i asked him to hear what he would say if he
could recommend me to any particular place in london 

no he said none that was fit for me or that i should like his friend
belford indeed had very handsome lodgings near soho-square at a
relation's whose wife was a woman of virtue and honour these as mr 
belford was generally in the country he could borrow till i was better
accommodated 

i was resolved to refuse these at the first mention as i should any
other he had named nevertheless i will see thought i if he has
really thought of these for me if i break off the talk here and he
resume this proposal with earnestness in the morning i shall apprehend
that he is less indifferent than he seems to be about my going to
london and that he has already a lodging in his eye for me and then i
will not go at all 

but after such generous motions from him i really think it a little
barbarous to act and behave as if i thought him capable of the blackest
and most ungrateful baseness but his character his principles are so
faulty he is so light so vain so various that there is no certainty
that he will be next hour what he is this then my dear i have no
guardian now no father no mother only god and my vigilance to depend
upon and i have no reason to expect a miracle in my favour 

well sir said i  rising to leave him   something must be resolved
upon but i will postpone this subject till to-morrow morning 

he would fain have engaged me longer but i said i would see him as
early as he pleased in the morning he might think of any convenient
place in london or near it in mean time 

and so i retired from him as i do from my pen hoping for better rest
for the few hours that remain of this night than i have had of a long
time 

clarissa harlowe 




letter xxxiv

miss clarissa harlowe  in continuation   monday morning april 17 


late as i went to bed i have had very little rest sleep and i have
quarreled and although i court it it will not be friends i hope its
fellow-irreconcilables at harlowe-place enjoy its balmy comforts else
that will be an aggravation of my fault my brother and sister i dare
say want it not 

mr lovelace who is an early riser as well as i joined me in the
garden about six and after the usual salutations asked me to resume
our last night's subject it was upon lodgings at london he said 

i think you mentioned one to me sir did you not 

yes madam  but watching the turn of my countenance   rather as what
you would be welcome to than perhaps approve of 

i believe so too to go to town upon an uncertainty i own is not
agreeable but to be obliged to any persons of your acquaintance when
i want to be thought independent of you and to a person especially to
whom my friends are to direct to me if they vouchsafe to take notice of
me at all is an absurd thing to mention 

he did not mention it as what he imagined i would accept but only to
confirm to me what he had said that he himself knew of none fit for me 

has not your family madam some one tradesman they deal with who has
conveniences of this kind i would make it worth such a person's while
to keep his secret of your being at his house traders are dealers in
pins said he and will be more obliged by a penny customer than by a
pound present because it is in their way yet will refuse neither any
more than a lawyer or a man of office his fee 

my father's tradesmen i said would no doubt be the first employed to
find me out so that that proposal was as wrong as the other and who
is it that a creature so lately in favour with all her friends can apply
to in such a situation as mine but must be at least equally the
friends of her relations 

we had a good deal of discourse upon the same topic but at last the
result was this he wrote a letter to one mr doleman a married man 
of fortune and character i excepting to mr belford desiring him
to provide decent apartments ready furnished  i had told him what they
should be  for a single woman consisting of a bed-chamber another for
a maidservant with the use of a dining-room or parlour this letter he
gave me to peruse and then sealed it up and dispatched it away in my
presence by one of his own servants who having business in town is
to bring back an answer 

i attend the issue of it holding myself in readiness to set out for
london unless you my dear advise the contrary 




letter xxxv

mr lovelace to john belford esq sat sunday monday 


 he gives in several letters the substance of what is
 contained in the last seven of the lady's 

 he tells his friend that calling at the lawn in his way to
 m hall for he owns that he went not to windsor he
 found the letters from lady betty lawrance and his cousin
 montague which mrs greme was about sending to him by a
 special messenger 

 he gives the particulars from mrs greme's report of what
 passed between the lady and her as in letter vi and
 makes such declarations to mrs greme of his honour and
 affection to the lady as put her upon writing the letter to
 her sister sorlings the contents of which are in letter
 xxviii 

 he then accounts as follows for the serious humour he
 found her in on his return 

upon such good terms when we parted i was surprised to find so solemn a
brow upon my return and her charming eyes red with weeping but when i
had understood she had received letters from miss howe it was natural
to imagine that that little devil had put her out of humour with me 

it is easy for me to perceive that my charmer is more sullen when
she receives and has perused a letter from that vixen than at other
times but as the sweet maid shews even then more of passive grief 
than of active spirit i hope she is rather lamenting than plotting 
and indeed for what now should she plot when i am become a reformed
man and am hourly improving in my morals nevertheless i must
contrive some way or other to get at their correspondence only to see
the turn of it that's all 

but no attempt of this kind must be made yet a detected invasion in an
article so sacred would ruin me beyond retrieve nevertheless it vexes
me to the heart to think that she is hourly writing her whole mind on
all that passes between her and me i under the same roof with her 
yet kept at such awful distance that i dare not break into a
correspondence that may perhaps be a mean to defeat all my devices 

would it be very wicked jack to knock her messenger on the head as
he is carrying my beloved's letters or returning from miss howe's to
attempt to bribe him and not succeed would utterly ruin me and the
man seems to be one used to poverty one who can sit down satisfied with
it and enjoy it contented with hand-to-mouth conveniencies and not
aiming to live better to-morrow than he does to-day and than he did
yesterday such a one is above temptation unless it could come clothed
in the guise of truth and trust what likelihood of corrupting a man who
has no hope no ambition 

yet the rascal has but half life and groans under that should i be
answerable in his case for a whole life but hang the fellow let him
live were i king or a minister of state an antonio perez it were
another thing and yet on second thoughts am i not a rake as it is
called and who ever knew a rake stick at any thing but thou knowest 
jack that the greatest half of my wickedness is vapour to shew my
invention and to prove that i could be mischievous if i would 


 antonio perez was first minister of philip ii king of spain by whose
command he caused don juan de escovedo to be assassinated which brought
on his own ruin through the perfidy of his viler master gedde's
tracts 


 when he comes to that part where the lady says letter
 xxix in a sarcastic way waving her hand and bowing 
 excuse me good mr lovelace that i am willing to think
 the best of my father  he gives a description of her air
 and manner greatly to her advantage and says 

i could hardly forbear taking her into my arms upon it in spite of an
expected tempest so much wit so much beauty such a lively manner 
and such exceeding quickness and penetration o belford she must be
nobody's but mine i can now account for and justify herod's command to
destroy his mariamne if he returned not alive from his interview with
caesar for were i to know that it were but probable that any other
man were to have this charming creature even after my death the very
thought would be enough to provoke me to cut that man's throat were he
a prince 

i may be deemed by this lady a rapid a boisterous lover and she may
like me the less for it but all the ladies i have met with till now 
loved to raise a tempest and to enjoy it nor did they ever raise it 
but i enjoyed it too lord send us once happily to london 


 mr lovelace gives the following account of his rude
 rapture when he seized her hand and put her by his wild
 manner as she expresses it letter xxxix into such terror 

darkness and light i swore were convertible at her pleasure she could
make any subject plausible i was all error she all perfection and i
snatched her hand and more than kissed it i was ready to devour it 
there was i believe a kind of phrensy in my manner which threw her
into a panic like that of semele perhaps when the thunderer in all
his majesty surrounded with ten thousand celestial burning-glasses was
about to scorch her into a cinder 


 


had not my heart misgiven me and had i not just in time recollected
that she was not so much in my power but that she might abandon me at
her pleasure having more friends in that house than i had i should at
that moment have made offers that would have decided all one way
or other but apprehending that i had shewn too much meaning in my
passion i gave it another turn but little did the charmer think that
an escape either she or i had as the event might have proved from
that sudden gust of passion which had like to have blown me into
her arms she was born i told her to make me happy and to save a
soul 


 he gives the rest of his vehement speech pretty nearly in
 the same words as the lady gives them and then proceeds 

i saw she was frighted and she would have had reason had the scene been
london and that place in london which i have in view to carry her to 
she confirmed me in my apprehension that i had alarmed her too much 
she told me that she saw what my boasted regard to her injunctions was 
and she would take proper measures upon it as i should find that she
was shocked at my violent airs and if i hoped any favour from her i
must that instant withdraw and leave her to her recollection 

she pronounced this in such a manner as shewed she was set upon it and 
having stepped out of the gentle and polite part i had so newly engaged
to act i thought ready obedience was the best atonement and indeed i
was sensible from her anger and repulses that i wanted time myself
for recollection and so i withdrew with the same veneration as a
petitioning subject would withdraw from the presence of his sovereign 
but o belford had she had but the least patience with me had she but
made me think she would forgive this initiatory ardour surely she will
not be always thus guarded 

i had not been a moment by myself but i was sensible that i had half
forfeited my newly-assumed character it is exceedingly difficult thou
seest for an honest man to act in disguises as the poet says thrust
nature back with a pitchfork it will return i recollected that what
she had insisted upon was really a part of that declared will before she
left her father's house to which in another case to humble her i had
pretended to have an inviolable regard and when i had remembered her
words of taking her measures accordingly i was resolved to sacrifice
a leg or an arm to make all up again before she had time to determine
upon any new measures 

how seasonably to this purpose have come in my aunt's and cousin's
letters 


 


i have sent in again and again to implore her to admit me to her
presence but she will conclude a letter she is writing to miss howe 
before she will see me i suppose to give her an account of what has
just passed 


 


curse upon her perverse tyranny how she makes me wait for an humble
audience though she has done writing for some time a prince begging
for her upon his knees should not prevail upon me to spare her if i can
but get her to london oons jack i believe i have bit my lip through
for vexation but one day her's shall smart for it 


 mr lovelace beginning a new date gives an account of his
 admittance and of the conversation that followed which
 differing only in style from that of the lady gives in the
 next letter is omitted 

 he collects the lady's expressions which his pride cannot
 bear such as that he is a stranger to the decorums which
 she thought inseparable from a man of birth and education 
 and that he is not the accomplished man he imagines himself
 to be and threatens to remember them against her 

 he values himself upon his proposals and speeches which he
 gives to his friend pretty much to the same purpose that
 the lady does in her four last letters 

 after mentioning his proposal to her that she would borrow a
 servant from miss howe till hannah could come he writes
 as follows 

thou seest belford that my charmer has no notion that miss howe
herself is but a puppet danced upon my wires at second or third hand to
outwit and impel as i please two such girls as these who think they
know every thing and by taking advantage of the pride and ill-nature
of the old ones of both families to play them off likewise at the very
time they think they are doing me spiteful displeasure what charming
revenge then the sweet creature when i wished that her brother was
not at the bottom of mrs howe's resentment to tell me that she was
afraid he was or her uncle would not have appeared against her to that
lady pretty dear how innocent 

but don't think me the cause neither of her family's malice and
resentment it is all in their hearts i work but with their materials 
they if left to their own wicked direction would perhaps express their
revenge by fire and faggot that is to say by the private dagger or
by lord chief justices' warrants by law and so forth i only point
the lightning and teach it where to dart without the thunder in other
words i only guide the effects the cause is in their malignant hearts 
and while i am doing a little mischief i prevent a great deal 


thus he exalts on her mentioning london 

i wanted her to propose london herself this made me again mention
windsor if you would have a woman do one thing you must always propose
another and that the very contrary the sex the very sex as i hope
to be saved why jack they lay a man under a necessity to deal doubly
with them and when they find themselves outwitted they cry out upon
an honest fellow who has been too hard for them at their own weapons 

i could hardly contain myself my heart was at my throat down down 
said i to myself exuberant exultation a sudden cough befriended me 
i again turned to her all as indifferenced over as a girl at the first
long-expected question who waits for two more i heard out the rest of
her speech and when she had done instead of saying any thing to her
for london i advised her to send for mrs norton 

as i knew she would be afraid of lying under obligation i could have
proposed to do so much for the good woman and her son as would have
made her resolve that i should do nothing this however not merely to
avoid expense but there was no such thing as allowing of the presence
of mrs norton i might as well have had her mother or her aunt hervey
with her hannah had she been able to come and had she actually come 
i could have done well enough with what do i keep fellows idling in the
country for but to fall in love and even to marry those whom i would
have them marry nor upon second thoughts would the presence of her
norton or of her aunt or even of her mother have saved the dear
creature had i decreed her fall 

how unequal is a modest woman to the adventure when she throws herself
into the power of a rake punctilio will at any time stand for reason
with such an one she cannot break through a well-tested modesty none
but the impudent little rogues who can name the parson and the church
before you think of either and undress and go to bed before you the
next hour should think of running away with a man 


 


i am in the right train now every hour i doubt not will give me an
increasing interest in the affections of this proud beauty i have just
carried unpoliteness far enough to make her afraid of me and to shew
her that i am no whiner every instance of politeness now will give
me double credit with her my next point will be to make her acknowledge
a lambent flame a preference of me to all other men at least and
then my happy hour is not far off an acknowledged reciprocality in love
sanctifies every little freedom and little freedoms beget greater 
and if she call me ungenerous i can call her cruel the sex love to be
called cruel many a time have i complained of cruelty even in the act
of yielding because i knew it gratified the fair one's pride 


mentioning that he had only hinted at mr belford's lodgings as an instance to confirm what he had told her that he knew of none in
 london fit for her he says 

i had a mind to alarm her with something furthest from my purpose for
 as much as she disliked my motion i intend nothing by it mrs osgood
is too pious a woman and would have been more her friend than mine 

i had a view moreover to give her an high opinion of her own sagacity 
i love when i dig a put to have my prey tumble in with secure feet 
and open eyes then a man can look down upon her with an o-ho charmer 
how came you there 


monday april 17 

i have just now received a fresh piece of intelligence from my agent 
honest joseph leman thou knowest the history of poor miss betterton of
nottingham james harlowe is plotting to revive the resentments of her
family against me the harlowes took great pains some time ago to
endeavour to get to the bottom of that story but now the foolish devils
are resolved to do something in it if they can my head is working to
make this booby squire a plotter and a clever fellow in order to turn
his plots to my advantage supposing his sister shall aim to keep me
at arm's length when in town and to send me from her but i will in
proper time let thee see joseph's letter and what i shall answer to
it to know in time a designed mischief is with me to disappoint it 
and to turn it upon the contriver's head 


 see letters xlvii xlviii of this volume 


joseph is plaguy squeamish again but i know he only intends by his
qualms to swell his merits with me o belford belford what a vile
corruptible rogue whether in poor or rich is human nature 




letter xxxvi

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe  in answer to letters
xxviii xxxiv inclusive   tuesday april 18 


you have a most implacable family another visit from your uncle antony
has not only confirmed my mother an enemy to our correspondence but has
almost put her upon treading in their steps 

but to other subjects 

you plead generously for mr hickman perhaps with regard to him i
may have done as i have often done in singing begun a note or key
too high and yet rather than begin again proceed though i strain
my voice or spoil my tune but this is evident the man is the more
observant for it and you have taught me that the spirit which is the
humbler for ill usage will be insolent upon better so good and grave
mr hickman keep your distance a little longer i beseech you you have
erected an altar to me and i hope you will not refuse to bow to it 

but you ask me if i would treat mr lovelace were he to be in mr 
hickman's place as i do mr hickman why really my dear i believe i
should not i have been very sagely considering this point of behaviour
 in general on both sides in courtship and i will very candidly tell
you the result i have concluded that politeness even to excess 
is necessary on the men's part to bring us to listen to their first
addresses in order to induce us to bow our necks to a yoke so unequal 
but upon my conscience i very much doubt whether a little intermingled
insolence is not requisite from them to keep up that interest when
once it has got footing men must not let us see that we can make
fools of them and i think that smooth love that is to say a passion
without rubs in other words a passion without passion is like a
sleepy stream that is hardly seen to give motion to a straw so that 
sometimes to make us fear and even for a short space to hate the
wretch is productive of the contrary extreme 

if this be so lovelace than whom no man was ever more polite and
obsequious at the beginning has hit the very point for his turbulence
since his readiness to offend and his equal readiness to humble
himself as must keep a woman's passion alive and at last tire her
into a non-resistance that shall make her as passive as a tyrant-husband
would wish her to be 

i verily think that the different behaviour of our two heroes to
their heroines make out this doctrine to demonstration i am so much
accustomed for my own part to hickman's whining creeping submissive
courtship that i now expect nothing but whine and cringe from him and
am so little moved with his nonsense that i am frequently forced to go
to my harpsichord to keep me awake and to silence his humdrum whereas
lovelace keeps up the ball with a witness and all his address and
conversation is one continual game at raquet 

your frequent quarrels and reconciliations verify this observation and
i really believe that could hickman have kept my attention alive after
the lovelace manner only that he had preserved his morals i should
have married the man by this time but then he must have set out
accordingly for now he can never never recover himself that's
certain but must be a dangler to the end of the courtship-chapter and 
what is still worse for him a passive to the end of his life 

poor hickman perhaps you'll say 

i have been called your echo poor hickman say i 

you wonder my dear that mr lovelace took not notice to you over-night
of the letters of lady betty and his cousin i don't like his keeping
such a material and relative circumstance as i may call it one moment
from you by his communicating the contents of them to you next day 
when you was angry with him it looks as if he withheld them for
occasional pacifiers and if so must he not have had a forethought that
he might give you cause for anger of all the circumstances that have
happened since you have been with him i think i like this the least 
this alone my dear small as it might look to an indifferent eye in
mine warrants all your caution yet i think that mrs greme's letter to
her sister sorlings his repeated motions for hannah's attendance and
for that of one of the widow sorlings's daughters and above all for
that of mrs norton are agreeable counterbalances were it not for
these circumstances i should have said a great deal more of the other 
yet what a foolish fellow to let you know over-night that he had such
letters i can't tell what to make of him 

i am pleased with the contents of these ladies' letters and the more 
as i have caused the family to be again sounded and find that they are
all as desirous as ever of your alliance 

they really are every one of them your very great admirers and as for
lord m he is so much pleased with you and with the confidence as
he calls it which you have reposed in his nephew that he vows he will
disinherit him if he reward it not as he ought you must take care 
that you lose not both families 

i hear mrs norton is enjoined as she values the favour of the
other family not to correspond either with you or with me poor
creatures but they are your yet they are not your relations neither 
i believe had you had any other nurse i should have concluded you had
been changed i suffer by their low malice excuse me therefore 

you really hold this man to his good behaviour with more spirit than
i thought you mistress of especially when i judged of you by that
meekness which you always contended for as the proper distinction of
the female character and by the love which think as you please you
certainly have for him you may rather be proud of than angry at the
imputation since you are the only woman i ever knew read or heard
of whose love was so much governed by her prudence but when once the
indifference of the husband takes place of the ardour of the lover it
will be your turn and if i am not mistaken this man who is the only
self-admirer i ever knew who was not a coxcomb will rather in his day
expect homage than pay it 

your handsome husbands my dear make a wife's heart ache very often 
and though you are as fine a person of a woman at the least as he is
of a man he will take too much delight in himself to think himself more
indebted to your favour than you are to his distinction and preference
of you but no man take your finer mind with your very fine person can
deserve you so you must be contented should your merit be underrated 
since that must be so marry whom you will perhaps you will think i
indulge these sort of reflections against your narcissus's of men to
keep my mother's choice for me of hickman in countenance with myself i
don't know but there is something in it at least enough to have given
birth to the reflection 

i think there can be no objection to your going to london there as
in the centre you will be in the way of hearing from every body and
sending to any body and then you will put all his sincerity to the
test as to his promised absence and such like 

but indeed my dear i think you have nothing for it but marriage you
may try that you may say you have tried what your relations can be
brought to but the moment they refuse your proposals submit to the
yoke and make the best of it he will be a savage indeed if he makes
you speak out yet it is my opinion that you must bend a little for
he cannot bear to be thought slightly of 

this was one of his speeches once i believe designed for me a woman
who means one day to favour her lover with her hand should show the
world for her own sake that she distinguishes him from the common
herd 

shall i give you another very fine sentence of his and in the
true libertine style as he spoke it throwing out his challenging
hand d n him if he would marry the first princess on earth if
he but thought she balanced a minute in her choice of him or of an
emperor 

all the world in short expect you to have this man they think that
you left your father's house for this very purpose the longer the
ceremony is delayed the worse appearance it will have in the world's
eye and it will not be the fault of some of your relations if a slur
be not thrown upon your reputation while you continue unmarried your
uncle antony in particular speaks rough and vile things grounded upon
the morals of his brother orson but hitherto your admirable character
has antidoted the poison the detractor is despised and every one's
indignation raised against him 

i have written through many interruptions and you will see the first
sheet creased and rumpled occasioned by putting it into my bosom on my
mother's sudden coming upon me we have had one very pretty debate 
i will assure you but it is not worth while to trouble you with the
particulars but upon my world no matter though 

your hannah cannot attend you the poor girl left her place about a
fortnight ago on account of the rheumatic disorder which has confined
her to her room ever since she burst into tears when kitty carried
to her your desire of having her with you and called herself doubly
unhappy that she could not wait upon a mistress whom she so dearly
loved 

had my mother answered my wishes i should have been sorry mr lovelace
had been the first proposer of my kitty for your attendant till hannah
should come to be altogether among strangers and a stranger to attend
you every time you remove is a very disagreeable thing but your
considerateness and bounty will make you faithful ones wherever you go 

you must take your own way but if you suffer any inconvenience either
as to clothes or money that it is in my power to remedy i will never
forgive you my mother if that is your objection need not know any
thing of the matter 

we have all our defects we have often regretted the particular fault 
which though in venerable characters we must have been blind not to
see 

i remember what you once said to me and the caution was good let us 
my nancy were your words let us who have not the same failings
as those we censure guard against other and greater in ourselves 
nevertheless i must needs tell you that my mother has vexed me a
little very lately by some instances of her jealous narrowness i will
mention one of them though i did not intend it she wanted to borrow
thirty guineas of me only while she got a note changed i said i could
lend her but eight or ten eight or ten would not do she thought i was
much richer i could have told her i was much cunninger than to let her
know my stock which on a review i find ninety-five guineas and all
of them most heartily at your service 

i believe your uncle tony put her upon this wise project for she was
out of cash in an hour after he left her 

if he did you will judge that they intend to distress you if it will
provoke you to demand your own in a legal way i wish they would since
their putting you upon that course will justify the necessity of your
leaving them and as it is not for your credit to own that you were
tricked away contrary to your intention this would afford a reason for
your going off that i should make very good use of you'll see that
i approve of lovelace's advice upon this subject i am not willing to
allow the weight of your answer to him on that head which perhaps ought
to be allowed it 


 see letter xxxi of this volume 


you must be the less surprised at the inventions of this man because of
his uncommon talents whatever he had turned his head to he would have
excelled in or been or done things extraordinary he is said to be
revengeful a very bad quality i believe indeed he is a devil
in every thing but his foot this therefore is my repeated
advice provoke him not too much against yourself but unchain him and
let him loose upon your sister' betty and your brother's joseph leman 
this is resenting low but i know to whom i write or else i would go a
good deal higher  i'll assure you  

your next i suppose will be from london pray direct it and your
future letters till further notice to mr hickman at his own house 
he is entirely devoted to you don't take so heavily my mother's
partiality and prejudices i hope i am past a baby 

heaven preserve you and make you as happy as i think you deserve to be 
prays

your ever affectionate anna howe 




letter xxxvii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wedn morning april 19 


i am glad my dear friend that you approve of my removal to london 

the disagreement between your mother and you gives me inexpressible
affliction i hope i think you both more unhappy than you are but i
beseech you let me know the particulars of the debate you call a very
pretty one i am well acquainted with your dialect when i am informed
of the whole let your mother have been ever so severe upon me i
shall be easier a great deal faulty people should rather deplore the
occasion they have given for anger than resent it 

if i am to be obliged to any body in england for money it shall be to
you your mother need not know of your kindness to me you say but she
must know it if it be done and if she challenge my beloved friend upon
it for would you either falsify or prevaricate i wish your mother
could be made easy on this head forgive me my dear but i
know yet once she had a better opinion of me o my inconsiderate
rashness excuse me once more i pray you pride when it is native 
will shew itself sometimes in the midst of mortifications but my
stomach is down already 


 


i am unhappy that i cannot have my worthy hannah i am sorry for the
poor creature's illness as for my own disappointment by it come my
dear miss howe since you press me to be beholden to you and would
think me proud if i absolutely refused your favour pray be so good as
to send her two guineas in my name 

if i have nothing for it as you say but matrimony it yields little
comfort that his relations do not despise the fugitive as persons of
their rank and quality-pride might be supposed to do for having been a
fugitive 

but o my cruel thrice cruel uncle to suppose but my heart checks my
pen and will not let it proceed on an intimation so extremely shocking
as that which he supposes yet if thus they have been persuaded no
wonder if they are irreconcilable 

this is all my hard-hearted brother's doings his surmisings god
forgive him prays his injured sister 




letter xxxviii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe thursday april 20 


mr lovelace's servant is already returned with an answer from his
friend mr doleman who has taken pains in his inquiries and is very
particular mr lovelace brought me the letter as soon as he had read
it and as he now knows that i acquaint you with every thing that he
offers i desired him to let me send it to you for your perusal be
pleased to return it by the first opportunity you will see by it that
his friends in town have a notion that we are actually married 


to robert lovelace esq tuesday night april 18 

dear sir 

i am extremely rejoiced to hear that we shall so soon have you in town
after so long an absence you will be the more welcome still if what
report says be true which is that you are actually married to the
fair lady upon whom we have heard you make such encomiums mrs doleman 
and my sister both wish you joy if you are and joy upon your near
prospect if you are not 

i have been in town for this week past to get help if i could from my
paralytic complaints and am in a course for them which nevertheless 
did not prevent me from making the desired inquiries this is the
result 

you may have a first floor well furnished at a mercer's in
belford-street covent-garden with conveniencies for servants and
these either by the quarter or month the terms according to the
conveniences required 

mrs doleman has seen lodgings in norfolk-street and others in
cecil-street but though the prospects to the thames and surrey-hills
look inviting from both these streets yet i suppose they are too near
the city 

the owner of those in norfolk-street would have half the house go
together it would be too much for your description therefore and
i suppose that when you think fit to declare your marriage you will
hardly be in lodgings 

those in cecil-street are neat and convenient the owner is a widow of
a good character and she insists that you take them for a twelvemonth
certain 

you may have good accommodations in dover-street at a widow's 
the relict of an officer in the guards who dying soon after he had
purchased his commission to which he had a good title by service 
and which cost him most part of what he had she was obliged to let
lodgings 

this may possibly be an objection but she is very careful she says 
that she takes no lodgers but of figure and reputation she rents two
good houses distant from each other only joined by a large handsome
passage the inner-house is the genteelest and very elegantly
furnished but you may have the use of a very handsome parlour in the
outer-house if you choose to look into the street 

a little garden belongs to the inner-house in which the old gentlewoman
has displayed a true female fancy having crammed it with vases 
flower-pots and figures without number 

as these lodgings seemed to me the most likely to please you i was more
particular in my inquiries about them the apartments she has to let
are in the inner-house they are a dining-room two neat parlours a
withdrawing-room two or three handsome bedchambers one with a pretty
light closet in it which looks into the little garden all furnished in
taste 

a dignified clergyman his wife and maiden daughter were the last who
lived in them they have but lately quitted them on his being presented
to a considerable church preferment in ireland the gentlewoman says
that he took the lodgings but for three months certain but liked them
and her usage so well that he continued in them two years and left
them with regret though on so good an account she bragged that this
was the way of all the lodgers she ever had who staid with her four
times as long as they at first intended 

i had some knowledge of the colonel who was always looked upon as a man
of honour his relict i never saw before i think she has a masculine
air and is a little forbidding at first but when i saw her behaviour
to two agreeable gentlewomen her husband's nieces whom for that
reason she calls doubly hers and heard their praises of her i could
impute her very bulk to good humour since we seldom see your sour
peevish people plump she lives reputably and is as i find aforehand
in the world 

if these or any other of the lodgings i have mentioned be not
altogether to your lady's mind she may continue in them the less while 
and choose others for herself 

the widow consents that you shall take them for a month only and what
of them you please the terms she says she will not fall out upon 
when she knows what your lady expects and what her servants are to do 
or yours will undertake for she observed that servants are generally
worse to deal with than their masters or mistresses 

the lady may board or not as she pleases 

as we suppose you were married but that you have reason from
family-differences to keep it private for the present i thought it not
amiss to hint as much to the widow but as uncertainty however 
and asked her if she could in that case accommodate you and your
servants as well as the lady and hers she said she could and wished 
by all means it were to be so since the circumstance of a person's
being single it not as well recommended as this lady was one of the
usual exceptions 

if none of these lodgings please you need not doubt very handsome ones
in or near hanover-square soho-square golden-square or in some of the
new streets about grosvenor-square and mrs doleman her sister 
and myself most cordially join to offer to your good lady the best
accommodations we can make for her at uxbridge and also for you if you
are the happy man we wish you to be till she fits herself more to her
mind 

let me add that the lodgings at the mercer's those in cecil-street 
those at the widow's in dover-street any of them may be entered upon
at a day's warning 

i am my dear sir your sincere and affectionate friend and servant 
tho doleman 


you will easily guess my dear when you have read the letter which
lodgings i made choice of but first to try him as in so material
a point i thought i could not be too circumspect i seemed to prefer
those in norfolk-street for the very reason the writer gives why he
thought i would not that is to say for its neighbourhood to a city
so well governed as london is said to be nor should i have disliked a
lodging in the heart of it having heard but indifferent accounts of the
liberties sometimes taken at the other end of the town then seeming
to incline to the lodgings in cecil-street then to the mercer's but
he made no visible preference and when i asked his opinion of the
widow gentlewoman's he said he thought those the most to my taste and
convenience but as he hoped that i would think lodgings necessary but
for a very little while he knew not which to give his vote for 

i then fixed upon the widow's and he has written accordingly to mr 
doleman making my compliments to his lady and sister for their kind
offer 

i am to have the dining-room the bed-chamber with the light-closet of
which if i stay any time at the widow's i shall make great use and a
servant's room and we propose to set out on saturday morning as for
a maid servant poor hannah's illness is a great disappointment to me 
but as he observes i can make the widow satisfaction for one of
hers till i can get a servant to my mind and you know i want not much
attendance 


 


mr lovelace has just now of his own accord given me five guineas for
poor hannah i send them inclosed be so good as to cause them to be
conveyed to her and to let her know from whom they came 

he has obliged me much by this little mark of his considerateness 
indeed i have the better opinion of him ever since he proposed her
return to me 


 


i have just now another instance of his considerateness he came to me 
and said that on second thoughts he could not bear that i should go up
to town without some attendant were it but for the look of the thing to
the london widow and her nieces who according to his friend's account 
lived so genteelly and especially as i required him to leave me so soon
after i arrived there and so would be left alone among strangers he
therefore sought that i might engage mrs sorlings to lend me one of her
two maids or let one of her daughters go up with me and stay till i
were provided and if the latter the young gentlewoman no doubt would
be glad of so good an opportunity to see the curiosities of the town 
and would be a proper attendant on the same occasions 

i told him as i had done before that the two young gentlewomen were so
equally useful in their way and servants in a busy farm were so little
to be spared that i should be loth to take them off their laudable
employments nor should i think much of diversions for one while and so
the less want an attendant out of doors 

and now my dear lest any thing should happen in so variable a
situation as mine which at present are more promising than ever yet
they have been since i quitted harlowe-place i will snatch the
opportunity to subscribe myself

your not unhoping and ever-obliged friend and servant cl harlowe 




letter xxxix

mr lovelace to john belford esq thursday april 20 


 he begins with communicating to him the letter he wrote to
 mr doleman to procure suitable lodgings in town and which
 he sent away by the lady's approbation and then gives him a
 copy of the answer to it see p 218 upon which he thus
 expresses himself 

thou knowest the widow thou knowest her nieces thou knowest the
lodgings and didst thou ever read a letter more artfully couched
than this of tom doleman every possible objection anticipated every
accident provided against every tittle of it plot-proof 

who could forbear smiling to see my charmer like a farcical dean and
chapter choose what was before chosen for her and sagaciously as they
go in form to prayers that heaven would direct their choice pondering
upon the different proposals as if she would make me believe she had
a mind for some other the dear sly rogue looking upon me too with a
view to discover some emotion in me emotions i had but i can tell
her that they lay deeper than her eye could reach though it had been a
sun-beam 

no confidence in me fair one none at all tis plain thou wilt
not if i were inclined to change my views encourage me by a generous
reliance on my honour and shall it be said that i a master of arts in
love shall be overmatched by so unpractised a novice 

but to see the charmer so far satisfied with my contrivance as to borrow
my friend's letter in order to satisfy miss howe likewise 

silly little rogues to walk out into bye-paths on the strength of their
own judgment when nothing but experience can enable them to disappoint
us and teach them grandmother-wisdom when they have it indeed then
may they sit down like so many cassandras and preach caution to
others who will as little mind them as they did their instructresses 
whenever a fine handsome confidant young fellow such a one as thou
knowest who comes across them 

but belford didst thou not mind that sly rogue doleman's naming
dover-street for the widow's place of abode what dost thou think
could be meant by that tis impossible thou shouldst guess so not
to puzzle thee about it suppose the widow sinclair's in dover-street
should be inquired after by some officious person in order to come at
characters  miss howe is as sly as the devil and as busy to the full  
and neither such a name nor such a house can be found in that street 
nor a house to answer the description then will not the keenest hunter
in england be at a fault 

but how wilt thou do methinks thou askest to hinder the lady from
resenting the fallacy and mistrusting thee the more on that account 
when she finds it out to be in another street 

pho never mind that either i shall have a way for it or we shall
thoroughly understand one another by that time or if we don't she'll
know enough of me not to wonder at such a peccadilla 

but how wilt thou hinder the lady from apprizing her friend of the real
name 

she must first know it herself monkey must she not 

well but how wilt thou do to hinder her from knowing the street and
her friend from directing letters thither which will be the same thing
as if the name were known 

let me alone for that too 

if thou further objectest that tom doleman is too great a dunce to
write such a letter in answer to mine canst thou not imagine that in
order to save honest tom all this trouble i who know the town so well 
could send him a copy of what he should write and leave him nothing to
do but transcribe 

what now sayest thou to me belford 

and suppose i had designed this task of inquiry for thee and suppose
the lady excepted against thee for no other reason in the world but
because of my value for thee what sayest thou to the lady jack 

this it is to have leisure upon my hands what a matchless plotter
thy friend stand by and let me swell i am already as big as an
elephant and ten times wiser mightier too by far have i not reason
to snuff the moon with my proboscis lord help thee for a poor for a
very poor creature wonder not that i despise thee heartily since the
man who is disposed immoderately to exalt himself cannot do it but by
despising every body else in proportion 

i shall make good use of the dolemanic hint of being married but i will
not tell thee all at once nor indeed have i thoroughly digested that
part of my plot when a general must regulate himself by the motions of
a watchful adversary how can he say beforehand what he will or what he
will not do 

widow sinclair didst thou not say lovelace 

ay sinclair jack remember the name sinclair i repeat she has no
other and her features being broad and full-blown i will suppose her
to be of highland extraction as her husband the colonel  mind that too 
was a scot as brave as honest 

i never forget the minutiae in my contrivances in all matters that
admit of doubt the minutiae closely attended to and provided for are
of more service than a thousand oaths vows and protestations made to
supply the neglect of them especially when jealousy has made its way in
the working mind 

thou wouldst wonder if thou knewest one half of my providences to give
thee but one i have already been so good as to send up a list of books
to be procured for the lady's closet mostly at second hand and
thou knowest that the women there are all well read but i will not
anticipate besides it looks as if i were afraid of leaving any thing
to my old friend chance which has many a time been an excellent second
to me and ought not be affronted or despised especially by one who has
the art of making unpromising incidents turn out in his favour 




letter xl

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe wednesday april 19 


i have a piece of intelligence to give you which concerns you much to
know 

your brother having been assured that you are not married has taken a
resolution to find you out waylay you and carry you off a friend of
his a captain of a ship undertakes to get you on ship-board and to
sail away with you either to hull or leith in the way to one of your
brother's houses 

they are very wicked for in spite of your virtue they conclude you to
be ruined but if they can be assured when they have you that you are
not they will secure you till they can bring you out mrs solmes mean
time in order to give mr lovelace full employment they talk of a
prosecution which will be set up against him for some crime they have
got a notion of which they think if it do not cost him his life will
make him fly his country 

this is very early news miss bell told it in confidence and with
mighty triumph over lovelace to miss lloyd who is at present her
favourite though as much you admirer as ever miss lloyd being very
apprehensive of the mischief which might follow such an attempt told
it to me with leave to apprize you privately of it and yet neither
she nor i would be sorry perhaps if lovelace were to be fairly
hanged that is to say if you my dear had no objection to it but
we cannot bear that such an admirable creature should be made the
tennis-ball of two violent spirits much less that you should be seized 
and exposed to the brutal treatment of wretches who have no bowels 

if you can engage mr lovelace to keep his temper upon it i think you
should acquaint him with it but not to mention miss lloyd perhaps his
wicked agent may come at the intelligence and reveal it to him but
leave it to your own discretions to do as you think fit in it all my
concern is that this daring and foolish project if carried on will
be a mean of throwing you more into his power than ever but as it will
convince you that there can be no hope of a reconciliation i wish you
were actually married let the cause for prosecution hinted at be what
it will short of murder or a rape 

your hannah was very thankful for your kind present she heaped a
thousand blessings upon you for it she has mr lovelace's too by this
time 

i am pleased with mr hickman i can tell you for he has sent her
two guineas by the person who carries mr lovelace's five as from an
unknown hand nor am i or you to know it but he does a great many
things of this sort and is as silent as the night in his charities for
nobody knows of them till the gratitude of the benefited will not let
them be concealed he is now and then my almoner and i believe always
adds to my little benefactions 

but his time is not come to be praised to his face for these things nor
does he seem to want that encouragement 

the man certainly has a good mind nor can we expect in one man every
good quality but he is really a silly fellow my dear to trouble his
head about me when he sees how much i despise his whole sex and
must of course make a common man look like a fool were he not to
make himself look like one by wishing to pitch his tent so oddly our
likings and dislikings as i have often thought are seldom governed by
prudence or with a view to happiness the eye my dear the wicked eye 
has such a strict alliance with the heart and both have such enmity to
the judgment what an unequal union the mind and body all the senses 
like the family at harlowe-place in a confederacy against that which
would animate and give honour to the whole were it allowed its proper
precedence 

permit me i beseech you before you go to london to send you
forty-eight guineas i mention that sum to oblige you because by
accepting back the two to hannah i will hold you indebted to me
fifty surely this will induce you you know that i cannot want the
money i told you that i had near double that sum and that the half of
it is more than my mother knows i am mistress of you are afraid that my
mother will question me on this subject and then you think i must own
the truth but little as i love equivocation and little as you would
allow of it in your anna howe it is hard if i cannot were i to be put
to it ever so closely find something to say that would bring me off 
as you have what can you do at such a place as london you don't know
what occasion you may have for messengers intelligence and suchlike 
if you don't oblige me i shall not think your stomach so much down as
you say it is and as in this one particular i think it ought to be 

as to the state of things between my mother and me you know enough of
her temper not to need to be told that she never espouses or resents
with indifference yet will she not remember that i am her daughter no 
truly i am all my papa's girl 

she was very sensible surely of the violence of my poor father's
temper that she can so long remember that when acts of tenderness and
affection seem quite forgotten some daughters would be tempted to think
that controul sat very heavy upon a mother who can endeavour to exert
the power she has over a child and regret for years after death that
she had not the same over a husband 

if this manner of expression becomes not me of my mother the fault will
be somewhat extenuated by the love i always bore to my father and by
the reverence i shall ever pay to his memory for he was a fond father 
and perhaps would have been as tender a husband had not my mother and
he been too much of a temper to agree 

the misfortune was in short that when one was out of humour the
other would be so too yet neither of their tempers comparatively
bad notwithstanding all which i did not imagine girl as i was in my
father's life-time that my mother's part of the yoke sat so heavy upon
her neck as she gives me room to think it did whenever she is pleased
to disclaim her part of me 

both parents as i have often thought should be very careful if they
would secure to themselves the undivided love of their children that 
of all things they should avoid such durable contentions with each
other as should distress their children in choosing their party when
they would be glad to reverence both as they ought 

but here is the thing there is not a better manager of affairs in the
sex than my mother and i believe a notable wife is more impatient of
controul than an indolent one an indolent one perhaps thinks she
has some thing to compound for while women of the other character i
suppose know too well their own significance to think highly of that of
any body else all must be their own way in one word because they are
useful they will be more than useful 

i do assure you my dear were i man and a man who loved my quiet i
would not have one of these managing wives on any consideration i would
make it a matter of serious inquiry beforehand whether my mistress's
qualifications if i heard she was notable were masculine or feminine
ones if indeed i were an indolent supine mortal who might be in danger
of perhaps choosing to marry for the qualifications of a steward 

but setting my mother out of the question because she is my mother 
have i not seen how lady hartley pranks up herself above all her sex 
because she knows how to manage affairs that do not belong to her sex
to manage affairs that do no credit to her as a woman to understand 
practically i mean for the theory of them may not be amiss to be
known 

indeed my dear i do not think a man-woman a pretty character at all 
and as i said were i a man i would sooner choose a dove though it
were fit for nothing but as the play says to go tame about house 
and breed than a wife that is setting at work my insignificant self
present perhaps every busy our my never-resting servants those of
the stud not excepted and who with a besom in her hand as i may say 
would be continually filling my with apprehensions that she wanted to
sweep me out of my own house as useless lumber 

were indeed the mistress of a family like the wonderful young lady i so
much and so justly admire to know how to confine herself within her own
respectable rounds of the needle the pen the housekeeper's bills the
dairy for her amusement to see the poor fed from superfluities that
would otherwise be wasted and exert herself in all the really-useful
branches of domestic management then would she move in her proper
sphere then would she render herself amiably useful and respectably
necessary then would she become the mistress-wheel of the family 
 whatever you think of your anna howe i would not have her be the
master-wheel   and every body would love her as every body did you 
before your insolent brother came back flushed with his unmerited
acquirements and turned all things topsy-turvy 

if you will be informed of the particulars of our contention after
you have known in general that your unhappy affair was the subject why
then i think i must tell you 

yet how shall i i feel my cheek glow with mingled shame and
indignation know then my dear that i have been as i may say that
i have been beaten indeed tis true my mother thought fit to slap my
hands to get from me a sheet of a letter she caught me writing to you 
which i tore because she should not read it and burnt it before her
face 

i know this will trouble you so spare yourself the pains to tell me it
does 

mr hickman came in presently after i would not see him i am either
too much a woman to be beat or too much a child to have an humble
servant so i told my mother what can one oppose but sullens when it
would be unpardonable so much as to think of lifting up a finger 

in the harlowe style she will be obeyed she says and even mr hickman
shall be forbid the house if he contributes to the carrying on of a
correspondence which she will not suffer to be continued 

poor man he stands a whimsical chance between us but he knows he is
sure of my mother but not of me tis easy then for him to choose his
party were it not his inclination to serve you as it surely is and
this makes him a merit with me which otherwise he would not have had 
notwithstanding the good qualities which i have just now acknowledged in
his favour for my dear let my faults in other respects be what they
may i will pretend to say that i have in my own mind those qualities
which i praised him for and if we are to come together i could for
that reason better dispense with them in him so if a husband who has
a bountiful-tempered wife is not a niggard nor seeks to restrain her 
but has an opinion of all she does that is enough for him as on the
contrary if a bountiful-tempered husband has a frugal wife it is
best for both for one to give and the other to give except they have
prudence and are at so good an understanding with each other as to
compare notes they may perhaps put it out of their power to be just 
good frugal doctrine my dear but this way of putting it is middling
the matter between what i have learnt of my mother's over-prudent and
your enlarged notions but from doctrine to fact 

i shut myself up all that day and what little i did eat eat alone but
at night she sent up kitty with a command upon my obedience to attend
her at supper 

i went down but most gloriously in the sullens yes and no were great
words with me to every thing she asked for a good while 

that behaviour she told me should not do for her 

beating should not do for me i said 

my bold resistance she told me had provoked her to slap my hand and
she was sorry to have been so provoked but again insisted that i would
either give up my correspondence absolutely or let her see all that
passed in it 

i must not do either i told her it was unsuitable both to my
inclination and to my honour at the instigation of base minds to give
up a friend in distress 

she rung all the maternal changes upon the words duty obedience filial
obligation and so forth 

i told her that a duty too rigorously and unreasonably exacted had been
your ruin if you were ruined 

if i were of age to be married i hope she would think me capable
of making or at least of keeping my own friendships such a one
especially as this with a woman too and one whose friendship she
herself till this distressful point of time had thought the most
useful and edifying that i had ever contracted 

the greater the merit the worse the action the finer the talents the
more dangerous the example 

there were other duties i said besides the filial one and i hoped i
need not give up a suffering friend especially at the instigation of
those by whom she suffered i told her that it was very hard to annex
such a condition as that to my duty when i was persuaded that both
duties might be performed without derogating from either that an
unreasonable command she must excuse me i must say it though i were
slapped again was a degree of tyranny and i could not have expected 
that at these years i should be allowed now will no choice of my
own where a woman only was concerned and the devilish sex not in the
question 

what turned most in favour of her argument was that i desired to be
excused from letting her read all that passes between us she insisted
much upon this and since she said you were in the hands of the
most intriguing man in the world and a man who had made a jest of
her favourite hickman as she had been told she knows not what
consequences unthought of by your or me may flow from such a
correspondence 

so you see my dear that i fare the worse on mr hickman's account 
my mother might see all that passes between us did i not know that
it would cramp your spirit and restrain the freedom of your pen as
it would also the freedom of mine and were she not moreover so firmly
attached to the contrary side that inferences consequences strained
deductions censures and constructions the most partial would for
ever to be haled in to tease me and would perpetually subject us to the
necessity of debating and canvassing 

besides i don't choose that she should know how much this artful wretch
has outwitted as i may call it a person so much his superior in all
the nobler qualities of the human mind 

the generosity of your heart and the greatness of your soul full well
i know but do offer to dissuade me from this correspondence 

mr hickman immediately on the contention above offered his service 
and i accepted of it as you will see by my last he thinks though
he has all honour for my mother that she is unkind to us both he was
pleased to tell me with an air as i thought that he not only approved
of our correspondence but admired the steadiness of my friendship and
having no opinion of your man but a great one of me thinks that my
advice or intelligence from time to time may be of use to you and
on this presumption said that it would be a thousand pities that you
should suffer for want of either 

mr hickman pleased me in the main of his speech and it is well the
general tenor of it was agreeable otherwise i can tell him i should
have reckoned with him for his word approve for it is a style i have
not yet permitted him to talk to me in and you see my dear what these
men are no sooner do they find that you have favoured them with the
power of doing you an agreeable service but they take upon them to
approve forsooth of your actions by which is implied a right to
disapprove if they think fit 

i have told my mother how much you wish to be reconciled to your
relations and how independent you are upon lovelace 

mark the end of the latter assertion she says and as to
reconciliation she knows that nothing will do and will have it that
nothing ought to do but your returning back without presuming to
condition with them and this if you do she says will best show your
independence on lovelace 

you see my dear what your duty is in my mother's opinion 

i suppose your next directed to mr hickman at his own house will be
from london 

heaven preserve you in honour and safety is my prayer 

what you do for change of clothes i cannot imagine 

it is amazing to me what your relations can mean by distressing you 
as they seem resolved to do i see they will throw you into his arms 
whether you will or not 

i send this by robert for dispatch-sake and can only repeat the
hitherto-rejected offer of my best services adieu my dearest friend 
believe me ever

your affectionate and faithful anna howe 




letter xli

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe tuesday april 20 


i should think myself utterly unworthy of your friendship did not my
own concerns heavy as they are so engross me that i could not find
leisure for a few lines to declare to my beloved friend my sincere
disapprobation of her conduct in an instance where she is so generously
faulty that the consciousness of that very generosity may hide from
her the fault which i more than any other have reason to deplore as
being the unhappy occasion of it 

you know you say that your account of the contentions between your
mother and you will trouble me and so you bid me spare myself the pains
to tell you that they do 

you did not use my dear to forbid me thus beforehand you were wont
to say you loved me the better for my expostulations with you on that
acknowledged warmth and quickness of your temper which your own good
sense taught you to be apprehensive of what though i have so miserably
fallen and am unhappy if ever i had any judgment worth regarding it
is now as much worth as ever because i can give it as freely against
myself as against any body else and shall i not when there seems to be
an infection in my fault and that it leads you likewise to resolve to
carry on a correspondence against prohibition expostulate with you upon
it when whatever consequences flow from your disobedience they but
widen my error which is as the evil root from which such sad branches
spring 

the mind that can glory in being capable of so noble so firm so
unshaken friendship as that of my dear miss howe a friendship which
no casualty or distress can lessen but which increases with the
misfortunes of its friend such a mind must be above taking amiss
the well-meant admonitions of that distinguished friend i will not
therefore apologize for my freedom on this subject and the less need i 
when that freedom is the result of an affection in the very instance 
so absolutely disinterested that it tends to deprive myself of the only
comfort left me 

your acknowledged sullens your tearing from your mother's hands the
letter she thought she had a right to see and burning it as you own 
before her face your refusal to see the man who is so willing to obey
you for the sake of your unhappy friend and this purely to vex your
mother can you think my dear upon this brief recapitulation of hardly
one half of the faulty particulars you give that these faults are
excusable in one who so well knows her duty 

your mother had a good opinion of me once is not that a reason why she
should be more regarded now when i have as she believes so deservedly
forfeited it a prejudice in favour is as hard to be totally overcome as
a prejudice in disfavour in what a strong light then must that error
appear to her that should so totally turn her heart against me herself
not a principal in the case 

there are other duties you say besides the filial duty but that my
dear must be a duty prior to all other duties a duty anterior as i
may say to your very birth and what duty ought not to give way to that 
when they come in competition 

you are persuaded that the duty to your friend and the filial duty 
may be performed without derogating from either your mother thinks
otherwise what is the conclusion to be drawn from these premises 

when your mother sees how much i suffer in my reputation from the step
i have taken from whom she and all the world expected better things 
how much reason has she to be watchful over you one evil draws on
another after it and how knows she or any body where it may stop 

does not the person who will vindicate or seek to extenuate a faulty
step in another  in this light must your mother look upon the matter in
question between her and you  give an indication either of a culpable
will or a weak judgment and may not she apprehend that the censorious
will think that such a one might probably have equally failed under the
same inducements and provocations to use your own words as applied to
me in a former letter 

can there be a stronger instance in human lie than mine has so early
furnished within a few months past not to mention the uncommon
provocations to it which i have met with of the necessity of the
continuance of a watchful parent's care over a daughter let that
daughter have obtained ever so great a reputation for her prudence 

is not the space from sixteen to twenty-one that which requires this
care more than at any time of a young woman's life for in that period
do we not generally attract the eyes of the other sex and become the
subject of their addresses and not seldom of their attempts and is not
that the period in which our conduct or misconduct gives us a reputation
or disreputation that almost inseparably accompanies us throughout our
whole future lives 

are we not likewise then most in danger from ourselves because of the
distinction with which we are apt to behold particulars of that sex 

and when our dangers multiply both from within and without do not our
parents know that their vigilance ought to be doubled and shall that
necessary increase of care sit uneasy upon us because we are grown up
to stature and womanhood 

will you tell me if so what is the precise stature and age at which a
good child shall conclude herself absolved from the duty she owes to
a parent and at which a parent after the example of the dams of
the brute creation is to lay aside all care and tenderness for her
offspring 

is it so hard for you my dear to be treated like a child and can
you not think it is hard for a good parent to imagine herself under the
unhappy necessity of so treating her woman-grown daughter 

do you think if your mother had been you and you your mother and your
daughter had struggled with you as you did with her that you would
not have been as apt as your mother was to have slapped your daughter's
hands to have made her quit her hold and give up the prohibited
letter 

your mother told you with great truth that you provoked her to this
harshness and it was a great condescension in her and not taken notice
of by you as it deserved to say that she was sorry for it 

at every age on this side matrimony for then we come under another sort
of protection though that is far from abrogating the filial duty it
will be found that the wings of our parents are our most necessary and
most effectual safeguard from the vultures the hawks the kites and
other villainous birds of prey that hover over us with a view to seize
and destroy us the first time we are caught wandering out of the eye or
care of our watchful and natural guardians and protectors 

hard as you may suppose it to be denied to continuance of a
correspondence once so much approved even by the venerable denier 
yet if your mother think my fault to be of such a nature as that a
correspondence with me will cast a shade upon your reputation all my
own friends having given me up that hardship is to be submitted to and
must it not make her the more strenuous to support her own opinion when
she sees the first fruits of this tenaciousness on your side is to
be gloriously in the sullens as you call it and in a disobedient
opposition 

i know that you have a humourous meaning in that expression and that
this turn in most cases gives a delightful poignancy both to your
conversation and correspondence but indeed my dear this case will not
bear humour 

will you give me leave to add to this tedious expostulation that i by
no means approve of some of the things you write in relation to the
manner in which your father and mother lived at times lived only at
times i dare say though perhaps too often 

your mother is answerable to any body rather than to her child for
whatever was wrong in her conduct if any thing was wrong towards mr 
howe a gentleman of whose memory i will only say that it ought to be
revered by you but yet should you not examine yourself whether your
displeasure at your mother had no part in your revived reverence for
your father at the time you wrote 

no one is perfect and although your mother may not be right to remember
disagreeableness against the departed yet should you not want to be
reminded on whose account and on what occasion she remembered them 
you cannot judge nor ought you to attempt to judge of what might
have passed between both to embitter and keep awake disagreeable
remembrances in the survivor 




letter xlii

miss clarissa harlowe  in continuation  


but this subject must not be pursued another might with more pleasure 
 though not with more approbation upon one of your lively excursions 
it is upon the high airs you give yourself upon the word approve 

how comes it about i wonder that a young lady so noted for
predominating generosity should not be uniformly generous that your
generosity should fail in an instance where policy prudence gratitude 
would not permit it to fail mr hickman as you confess had indeed a
worthy mind if i had not long ago known that he would never have found
an advocate in me for my anna howe's favour to him often and often
have i been concerned when i was your happy guest to see him after a
conversation in which he had well supported his part in your absence 
sink at once into silence the moment you came into company 

i have told you of this before and i believe i hinted to you once 
that the superciliousness you put on only to him was capable of a
construction which at the time would have very little gratified your
pride to have had made since it would have been as much in his favour 
as in your disfavour 

mr hickman my dear is a modest man i never see a modest man but i
am sure if he has not wanted opportunities that he has a treasure in
his mind which requires nothing but the key of encouragement to unlock
it to make him shine while a confident man who to be confident 
must think as meanly of his company as highly of himself enters with
magisterial airs upon any subject and depending upon his assurance to
bring himself off when found out talks of more than he is master of 

but a modest man o my dear shall not a modest woman distinguish and
wish to consort with a modest man a man before whom and to whom she
may open her lips secure of his good opinion of all she says and of his
just and polite regard for her judgment and who must therefore inspire
her with an agreeable self-confidence 

what a lot have i drawn we are all indeed apt to turn teachers but 
surely i am better enabled to talk to write upon these subjects 
than ever i was but i will banish myself if possible from an address
which when i began to write i was determined to confine wholly to your
own particular 

my dearest dearest friend how ready are you to tell us what others
should do and even what a mother should have done but indeed you once 
i remember advanced that as different attainments required different
talents to master them so in the writing way a person might not be a
bad critic upon the works of others although he might himself be unable
to write with excellence but will you permit me to account for all this
readiness of finding fault by placing it to human nature which being
sensible of the defects of human nature that is to say of its own
defects loves to be correcting but in exercising that talent chooses
rather to turn its eye outward than inward in other words to employ
itself rather in the out-door search than in the in-door examination 

and here give me leave to add and yet it is with tender reluctance 
that although you say very pretty things of notable wives and
although i join with you in opinion that husbands may have as many
inconveniencies to encounter with as conveniencies to boast of from
women of that character yet lady hartley perhaps would have had milder
treatment from your pen had it not been dipped in gall with a mother in
your eye 

as to the money you so generously and repeatedly offer don't be angry
with me if i again say that i am very desirous that you should be able
to aver without the least qualifying or reserve that nothing of that
sort has passed between us i know your mother's strong way of putting
the question she is intent upon having answered but yet i promise that
i will be obliged to nobody but you when i have occasion 




letter xliii

miss clarissa harlowe  in continuation  


and now my dear a few words as to the prohibition laid upon you a
subject that i have frequently touched upon but cursorily because i
was afraid to trust myself with it knowing that my judgment if i did 
would condemn my practice 

you command me not to attempt to dissuade you from this correspondence 
and you tell me how kindly mr hickman approves of it and how obliging
he is to me to permit it to be carried on under cover to him but this
does not quite satisfy me 

i am a very bad casuist and the pleasure i take in writing to you who
are the only one to whom i can disburden my mind may make me as i have
hinted very partial to my own wishes else if it were not an artful
evasion beneath an open and frank heart to wish to be complied with i
would be glad methinks to be permitted still to write to you and only
to have such occasional returns by mr hickman's pen as well as cover 
as might set me right when i am wrong confirm me when right and guide
me where i doubt this would enable me to proceed in the difficult path
before me with more assuredness for whatever i suffer from the
censure of others if i can preserve your good opinion i shall not be
altogether unhappy let what will befall me 

and indeed my dear i know not how to forbear writing i have now no
other employment or diversion and i must write on although i were not
to send it to any body you have often heard me own the advantages i
have found from writing down every thing of moment that befalls me and
of all i think and of all i do that may be of future use to me for 
besides that this helps to form one to a style and opens and expands
the ductile mind every one will find that many a good thought
evaporates in thinking many a good resolution goes off driven out of
memory perhaps by some other not so good but when i set down what i
will do or what i have done on this or that occasion the resolution
or action is before me either to be adhered to withdrawn or amended 
and i have entered into compact with myself as i may say having given
it under my own hand to improve rather than to go backward as i live
longer 

i would willingly therefore write to you if i might the rather as it
would be the more inspiriting to have some end in view in what i write 
some friend to please besides merely seeking to gratify my passion for
scribbling 

but why if your mother will permit our correspondence on communicating
to her all that passes in it and if she would condescend to one only
condition may it not be complied with 

would she not do you think my dear be prevailed upon to have the
communication made to her in confidence 

if there were any prospect of a reconciliation with my friends i should
not have so much regard for my pride as to be afraid of any body's
knowing how much i have been outwitted as you call it i would in that
case when i had left mr lovelace acquaint your mother and all my own
friends with the whole of my story it would behove me so to do for my
own reputation and for their satisfaction 

but if i have no such prospect what will the communication of my
reluctance to go away with mr lovelace and of his arts to frighten
me away avail me your mother has hinted that my friends would insist
upon my returning home to them as a proof of the truth of my plea 
to be disposed of without condition at their pleasure if i scrupled
this my brother would rather triumph over me than keep my secret mr 
lovelace whose pride already so ill brooks my regrets for meeting him 
 when he thinks if i had not i must have been mr solmes's wife 
would perhaps treat me with indignity and thus deprived of all refuge
and protection i should become the scoff of men of intrigue a disgrace
to my sex while that avowed love however indiscreetly shown which is
followed by marriage will find more excuses made for it than generally
it ought to find 

but if your mother will receive the communication in confidence pray
shew her all that i have written or shall write if my past conduct
in that case shall not be found to deserve heavy blame i shall then
perhaps have the benefit of her advice as well as yours and if after
a re-establishment in her favour i shall wilfully deserve blame for the
time to come i will be content to be denied yours as well as hers for
ever 

as to cramping my spirit as you call it were i to sit down to write
what i know your mother must see that my dear is already cramped 
and do not think so unhandsomely of your mother as to fear that she
would make partial constructions against me neither you nor i can
doubt but that had she been left unprepossessedly to herself she
would have shown favour to me and so i dare say would my uncle
antony nay my dear i can extend my charity still farther for i am
sometimes of opinion that were my brother and sister absolutely certain
that they had so far ruined me in the opinion of both my uncles as that
they need not be apprehensive of my clashing with their interests 
they would not oppose a pardon although they might not wish a
reconciliation especially if i would make a few sacrifices to them 
which i assure you i should be inclined to make were i wholly free 
and independent on this man you know i never valued myself upon worldly
acquisitions but as they enlarged my power to do things i loved to
do and if i were denied the power i must as i now do curb my
inclination 

do not however think me guilty of an affectation in what i have said
of my brother and sister severe enough i am sure it is in the most
favourable sense and an indifferent person will be of opinion that
they are much better warranted than ever for the sake of the family
honour to seek to ruin me in the favour of all my friends 

but to the former topic try my dear if your mother will upon the
condition above given permit our correspondence on seeing all we
write but if she will not what a selfishness would there be in my love
to you were i to wish you to forego your duty for my sake 

and now one word as to the freedom i have treated you with in this
tedious expostulatory address i presume upon your forgiveness of it 
because few friendships are founded on such a basis as ours which
is freely to give reproof and thankfully to receive it as occasions
arise that so either may have opportunity to clear up mistakes to
acknowledge and amend errors as well in behaviour as in words and
deeds and to rectify and confirm each other in the judgment each shall
form upon persons things and circumstances  and all this upon the
following consideration that it is much more eligible as well as
honourable to be corrected with the gentleness that may be expected
from an undoubted friend than by continuing either blind or wilful 
to expose ourselves to the censures of an envious and perhaps malignant
world 

but it is as needless i dare say to remind you of this as it is to
repeat my request so often repeated that you will not in your turn 
spare the follies and the faults of

your ever affectionate cl harlowe 


subjoined to the above 

i said that i would avoid writing any thing of my own particular
affairs in the above address if i could 

i will write one letter more to inform you how i stand with this man 
but my dear you must permit that one and your answer to it for i
want your advice upon the contents of mine and the copy of one i have
written to my aunt to be the last that shall pass between us while the
prohibition continues 

i fear i very much fear that my unhappy situation will draw me in to
being guilty of evasion of little affectations and of curvings from
the plain simple truth which i was wont to delight in and prefer to
every other consideration but allow me to say and this for your sake 
and in order to lessen your mother's fears of any ill consequences that
she might apprehend from our correspondence that if i am at any time
guilty of a failure in these respects i will not go on in it but
endeavour to recover my lost ground that i may not bring error into
habit 

i have deferred going to town at mrs sorlings's earnest request but
have fixed my removal to monday as i shall acquaint you in my next 

i have already made a progress in that next but having an unexpected
opportunity will send this by itself 




letter xliv

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe friday morning april 21 


my mother will not comply with your condition my dear i hinted it to
her as from myself but the harlowes excuse me have got her entirely
in with them it is a scheme of mine she told me formed to draw her
into your party against your parents which for your own sake she is
very careful about 

don't be so much concerned about my mother and me once more i beg of
you we shall do well enough together now a falling out now a falling
in 

it used to be so when you were not in the question 

yet do i give you my sincere thanks for every line of your reprehensive
letters which i intend to read as often as i find my temper rises 

i will freely own however that i winced a little at first reading
them but i see that on every re-perusal i shall love and honour you
still more if possible than before 

yet i think i have one advantage over you and which i will hold
through this letter and through all my future letters that is that
i will treat you as freely as you treat me and yet will never think an
apology necessary to you for my freedom 

but that you so think with respect to me is the effect of your
gentleness of temper with a little sketch of implied reflection on the
warmth of mine gentleness in a woman you hold to be no fault nor do i
a little due or provoked warmth but what is this but praising on both
sides what what neither of us can help nor perhaps wish to help you
can no more go out of your road than i can go out of mine it would be
a pain to either to do so what then is it in either's approving of her
own natural bias but making a virtue of necessity 

but one observation i will add that were your character and my
character to be truly drawn mine would be allowed to be the most
natural shades and lights are equally necessary in a fine picture 
yours would be surrounded with such a flood of brightness with such a
glory that it would indeed dazzle but leave one heartless to imitate
it 

o may you not suffer from a base world for your gentleness while my
temper by its warmth keeping all imposition at a distance though
less amiable in general affords me not reason as i have mentioned
heretofore to wish to make an exchange with you 

i should indeed be inexcusable to open my lips by way of contradiction
to my mother had i such a fine spirit as yours to deal with truth is
truth my dear why should narrowness run away with the praises due to a
noble expansion of heart if every body would speak out as i do that
is to say give praise where only praise is due dispraise where due
likewise shame if not principle would mend the world nay shame
would introduce principle in a generation or two very true my dear do
you apply i dare not for i fear you almost as much as i love you 

i will give you an instance nevertheless which will a-new demonstrate 
that none but very generous and noble-minded people ought to be
implicitly obeyed you know what i said above that truth is truth 

inconveniencies will sometimes arise from having to do with persons of
modest and scrupulousness mr hickman you say is a modest man he
put your corrective packet into my hand with a very fine bow and a
self-satisfied air  we'll consider what you say of this honest man
by-and-by my dear  his strut was no gone off when in came my mother 
as i was reading it 

when some folks find their anger has made them considerable they will
be always angry or seeking occasions for anger 

why now mr hickman why now nancy  as i was huddling in the
packet between my gown and my stays at her entrance   you have a
letter brought you this instant while the modest man with his pausing
brayings mad-da mad-dam looked as if he knew not whether to fight it
out or to stand his ground and see fair play 

it would have been poor to tell a lie for it she flung away i went
out at the opposite door to read the contents leaving mr hickman to
exercise his white teeth upon his thumb-nails 

when i had read your letters i went to find out my mother i told her
the generous contents and that you desired that the prohibition
might be adhered to i proposed your condition as for myself and was
rejected as above 

she supposed she was finely painted between two young creatures who
had more wit than prudence  and instead of being prevailed upon by the
generosity of your sentiments made use of your opinion only to confirm
her own and renewed her prohibitions charging me to return no other
answer but that she did renew them adding that they should stand 
till your relations were reconciled to you hinting as if she had
engaged for as much and expected my compliance 

i thought of your reprehensions and was meek though not pleased and
let me tell you my dear that as long as i can satisfy my own mind 
that good is intended and that it is hardly possible that evil should
ensue from our correspondence as long as i know that this prohibition
proceeds originally from the same spiteful minds which have been the
occasion of all these mischiefs as long as i know that it is not
your fault if your relations are not reconciled to you and that upon
conditions which no reasonable people would refuse you must give
me leave with all deference to your judgment and to your excellent
lessons which would reach almost every case of this kind but the
present to insist upon your writing to me and that minutely as if
this prohibition had not been laid 

it is not from humour from perverseness that i insist upon this i
cannot express how much my heart is in your concerns and you must in
short allow me to think that if i can do you service by writing i
shall be better justified in continuing to write than my mother is in
her prohibition 

but yet to satisfy you all i can i will as seldom return answers 
while the interdict lasts as may be consistent with my notions of
friendship and with the service i owe you and can do you 

as to your expedient of writing by hickman  and now my dear your
modest man comes in and as you love modesty in that sex i will do
my endeavour by holding him at a proper distance to keep him in your
favour  i know what you mean by it my sweet friend it is to make that
man significant with me as to the correspondence that shall go on 
i do assure you be as scrupulous as you please so that that will not
suffer if i do not close with your proposal as to him 

i must tell you that i think it will be honour enough for him to have
his name made use of so frequently betwixt us this of itself is
placing a confidence in him that will make him walk bolt upright and
display his white hand and his fine diamond ring and most mightily lay
down his services and his pride to oblige and his diligence and his
fidelity and his contrivances to keep our secret and his excuses 
and his evasions to my mother when challenged by her with fifty ana's
beside and will it not moreover give him pretence and excuse oftener
than ever to pad-nag it hither to good mrs howe's fair daughter 

but to admit him into my company tete-a-tete and into my closet as
often as i would wish to write to you i only dictate to his pen my
mother all the time supposing that i was going to be heartily in love
with him to make him master of my sentiments and of my heart as i may
say when i write to you indeed my dear i won't nor were i married
to the best he in england would i honour him with the communication of
my correspondences 

no my dear it is sufficient surely for him to parade in the
character of our letter-conveyor and to be honoured in a cover and
never fear but modest as you think him he will make enough of that 

you are always blaming me for want of generosity to this man and for
abuse of power but i profess my dear i cannot tell how to help it 
do dear now let me spread my plumes a little and now-and-then make
myself feared this is my time you know since it would be no more to
my credit than to his to give myself those airs when i am married he
has a joy when i am pleased with him that he would not know but for the
pain my displeasure gives him 

men no more than women know how to make a moderate use of power is
not that seen every day from the prince to the peasant if i do not
make hickman quake now-and-then he will endeavour to make me fear all
the animals in the creation are more or less in a state of hostility
with each other the wolf that runs away from a lion will devour a
lamb the next moment i remember that i was once so enraged at a game
chicken that was continually pecking at another a poor humble one as i
thought him that i had the offender caught and without more ado in a
pet of humanity wrung his neck off what followed this execution why
that other grew insolent as soon as his insulter was gone and was
continually pecking at one or two under him peck and be hanged said
i i might as well have preserved the first for i see it is the nature
of the beast 

excuse my flippancies i wish i were with you i would make you smile in
the midst of your gravest airs as i used to do o that you had
accepted of my offer to attend you but nothing that i offer will you
accept take care you will make me very angry with you and when i
am you know i value nobody for dearly as i love you i must be and
cannot always help it 

your saucy anna howe 




letter xlv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe friday april 22 


mr lovelace communicated to me this morning early from his
intelligencer the news of my brother's scheme i like him the better
for making very light of it and for his treating it with contempt and
indeed had i not had the hint of it from you i should have suspected
it to be some contrivance of his in order to hasten me to town where
he has long wished to be himself 

he read me the passage in that leman's letter which is pretty much to
the effect of what you wrote to me from miss lloyd with this addition 
that one singleton a master of a scots vessel is the man who is to be
the principal in this act of violence 

i have seen him he had been twice entertained at harlowe-place as my
brother's friend he has the air of a very bold and fearless man and i
fancy it must be his project as my brother i suppose talks to every
body of the rash step i have taken for he did not spare me before he
had this seeming reason to censure me 

this singleton lives at leith so perhaps i am to be carried to my
brother's house not far from that port 

putting these passages together i am not a little apprehensive that the
design lightly as mr lovelace from his fearless temper treats it 
may be attempted to be carried into execution and of the consequences
that may attend it if it be 

i asked mr lovelace seeing him so frank and cool what he would advise
me to do 

shall i ask you madam what are your own thoughts why i return the
question said he is because you have been so very earnest that i
should leave you as soon as you are in london that i know not what to
propose without offending you 

my opinion is said i that i should studiously conceal myself from the
knowledge of every body but miss howe and that you should leave me
out of hand since they will certainly conclude that where one is the
other is not far off and it is easier to trace you than me 

you would not surely wish said he to fall into your brother's hands
by such a violent measure as this i propose not to throw myself
officiously in their way but should they have reason to think i avoided
them would not that whet their diligence to find you and their courage
to attempt to carry you off and subject me to insults that no man of
spirit can bear 

lord bless me said i to what had this one fatal step that i have been
betrayed into 

dearest madam let me beseech you to forbear this harsh language when
you see by this new scheme how determined they were upon carrying
their old ones had you not been betrayed as you call it have i
offered to defy the laws of society as this brother of yours must do 
if any thing be intended by this project i hope you will be pleased to
observe that there are as violent and as wicked enterprisers as myself 
but this is so very wild a project that i think there can be no room
for apprehensions from it i know your brother well when at college 
he had always a romantic turn but never had a head for any thing but to
puzzle and confound himself a half-invention and a whole conceit but
not master of talents to do himself good or others harm but as those
others gave him the power by their own folly 

this is very volubly run off sir but violent spirits are but too much
alike at least in their methods of resenting you will not presume to
make yourself a less innocent man surely who had determined to brave
my whole family in person if my folly had not saved you the rashness 
and them the insult 

dear madam still must it be folly rashness it is as impossible for
you to think tolerably of any body out of your own family as it is
for any one in your family to deserve your love forgive me dearest
creature if i did not love you as never man loved a woman i might
appear more indifferent to preferences so undeservedly made but let me
ask you madam what have you borne from me what cause have i given
you to treat me with so much severity and so little confidence and what
have you not borne from them malice and ill-will sitting in judgment
upon my character may not give sentence in my favour but what of your
own knowledge have you against me 

spirited questions were they not my dear and they were asked with
as spirited an air i was startled but i was resolved not to desert
myself 

is this a time mr lovelace is this a proper occasion taken to
give yourself these high airs to me a young creature destitute of
protection it is a surprising question you ask me had i aught against
you of my own knowledge i can tell you sir and away i would have
flung 

he snatched my hand and besought me not to leave him in displeasure he
pleaded his passion for me and my severity to him and partiality for
those from whom i had suffered so much and whose intended violence he
said was now the subject of our deliberation 

i was forced to hear him 

you condescended dearest creature said he to ask my advice it was
very easy give me leave to say to advise you what to do i hope i may 
on this new occasion speak without offence notwithstanding your former
injunctions you see that there can be no hope of reconciliation with
your relations can you madam consent to honour with your hand a
wretch whom you have never yet obliged with one voluntary favour 

what a recriminating what a reproachful way my dear was this of
putting a question of this nature 

i expected not from him at the time and just as i was very angry with
him either the question or the manner i am ashamed to recollect the
confusion i was thrown into all your advice in my head at the moment 
yet his words so prohibitory he confidently seemed to enjoy my
confusion  indeed my dear he knows not what respectful love is   and
gazed upon me as if he would have looked me through 

he was still more declarative afterwards as i shall mention by-and-by 
but it was half extorted from him 

my heart struggled violently between resentment and shame to be thus
teased by one who seemed to have all his passions at command at a time
when i had very little over mine till at last i burst into tears and
was going from him in high disgust when throwing his arms about me 
with an air however the most tenderly respectful he gave a stupid
turn to the subject 

it was far from his heart he said to take so much advantage of the
streight which the discovery of my brother's foolish project had
brought me into as to renew without my permission a proposal which i
had hitherto discountenanced and which for that reason 

and then he came with his half-sentences apologizing for what he had
not so much as half-proposed 

surely he had not the insolence to intend to tease me to see if i could
be brought to speak what became me not to speak but whether he had or
not it did tease me insomuch that my very heart was fretted and i
broke out at last into fresh tears and a declaration that i was very
unhappy and just then recollecting how like a tame fool i stood with
his arms about me i flung from him with indignation but he seized my
hand as i was going out of the room and upon his knees besought my
stay for one moment and then in words the most clear and explicit 
tendered himself to my acceptance as the most effectual means to
disappoint my brother's scheme and set all right 

but what could i say to this extorted from him as it seemed to me 
rather as the effect of his compassion than his love what could i say 
i paused i looked silly i am sure i looked very silly he suffered me
to pause and look silly waiting for me to say something and at last
 ashamed of my confusion and aiming to make an excuse for it i told
him that i desired he would avoid such measures as might add to the
uneasiness which it must be visible to him i had when he reflected upon
the irreconcilableness of my friends and upon what might follow from
this unaccountable project of my brother 

he promised to be governed by me in every thing and again the wretch 
instead of pressing his former question asked me if i forgave him for
the humble suit he had made to me what had i to do but to try for a
palliation of my confusion since it served me not 

i told him i had hopes it would not be long before mr morden arrived 
and doubted not that that gentleman would be the readier to engage in my
favour when he found that i made no other use of his mr lovelace's 
assistance than to free myself from the addresses of a man so
disagreeable to me as mr solmes i must therefore wish that every thing
might remain as it was till i could hear from my cousin 

this although teased by him as i was was not you see my dear 
a denial but he must throw himself into a heat rather than try to
persuade which any other man in his situation i should think would
have done and this warmth obliged me to adhere to my seeming negative 

this was what he said with a vehemence that must harden any woman's
mind who had a spirit above being frighted into passiveness 

good god and will you madam still resolve to show me that i am
to hope for no share in your favour while any the remotest prospect
remains that you will be received by my bitterest enemies at the price
of my utter rejection 

this was what i returned with warmth and with a salving art too you
should have seen mr lovelace how much my brother's violence can
affect me but you will be mistaken if you let loose yours upon me with
a thought of terrifying me into measures the contrary of which you have
acquiesced with 

he only besought me to suffer his future actions to speak for him and
if i saw him worthy of any favour that i would not let him be the only
person within my knowledge who was not entitled to my consideration 

you refer to a future time mr lovelace so do i for the future proof
of a merit you seem to think for the past time wanting and justly you
think so and i was again going from him 

one word more he begged me to hear he was determined studiously to
avoid all mischief and every step that might lead to mischief let my
brother's proceedings short of a violence upon my person be what they
would but if any attempt that should extend to that were to be made 
would i have had him to be a quiet spectator of my being seized or
carried back or on board by this singleton or in case of extremity 
was he not permitted to stand up in my defence 

stand up in my defence mr lovelace i should be very miserable were
there to be a call for that but do you think i might not be safe and
private in london by your friend's description of the widow's house i
should think i might be safe there 

the widow's house he replied as described by his friend being a back
house within a front one and looking to a garden rather than to a
street had the appearance of privacy but if when there it was not
approved it would be easy to find another more to my liking though as
to his part the method he would advise should be to write to my uncle
harlowe as one of my trustees and wait the issue of it here at mrs 
sorlings's fearlessly directing it to be answered hither to be afraid
of little spirits was but to encourage insults he said the substance
of the letter should be to demand as a right what they would refuse
if requested as a courtesy to acknowledge that i had put myself  too
well he said did their treatment justify me  into the protection of
the ladies of his family  by whose orders and lord m s he himself
would appear to act  but that upon my own terms which were such that
i was under no obligation to those ladies for the favour it being
no more than they would have granted to any one of my sex equally
distressed  if i approved not of his method happy should he think
himself he said if i would honour him with the opportunity of making
such a claim in his own name but this was a point  with his but's
again in the same breath   that he durst but just touch upon he hoped 
however that i would think their violence a sufficient inducement for
me to take such a wished-for resolution 

inwardly vexed i told him that he himself had proposed to leave me when
i was in town that i expected he would and that when i was known to
be absolutely independent i should consider what to write and what to
do but that while he was with me i neither would nor could 

he would be very sincere with me he said this project of my brother's
had changed the face of things he must before he left me see whether
i should or should not approve of the london widow and her family if i
chose to go thither they might be people whom my brother might buy but
if he saw they were persons of integrity he then might go for a day
or two or so but he must needs say he could not leave me longer at a
time 

do you propose sir said i to take up your lodgings in the house where
i shall lodge 

he did not he said as he knew the use i intended to make of his
absence and my punctilio and yet the house where he had lodgings was
new-fronting and not in condition to receive him but he could go to
his friend belford's in soho or perhaps he might reach to the same
gentleman's house at edgware over night and return on the mornings 
till he had reason to think this wild project of my brother's laid
aside but to no greater distance till then should he care to venture 

the result of all was to set out on monday next for town i hope it
will be in a happy hour 

cl harlowe 




letter xlvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq friday april 21 


 as it was not probable that the lady could give so particular an
account of her own confusion in the affecting scene she mentions on mr 
lovelace's offering himself to her acceptance the following extracts
are made from his letter of the above date  

and now belford what wilt thou say if like the fly buzzing about the
bright taper i had like to have singed the silken wings of my liberty 
never was man in greater danger of being caught in his own snares all
my views anticipated all my schemes untried the admirable creature no
brought to town nor one effort made to know if she be really angel or
woman 

i offered myself to her acceptance with a suddenness tis true that
gave her no time to wrap herself in reserves and in terms less tender
than fervent tending to upbraid her for her past indifference and to
remind her of her injunctions for it was the fear of her brother 
not her love of me that had inclined her to dispense with those
injunctions 

i never beheld so sweet a confusion what a glory to the pencil 
could it do justice to it and to the mingled impatience which visibly
informed every feature of the most meaning and most beautiful face
in the world she hemmed twice or thrice her look now so charmingly
silly then so sweetly significant till at last the lovely teaser 
teased by my hesitating expectation of her answer out of all power
of articulate speech burst into tears and was turning from me with
precipitation when presuming to fold her in my happy arms o think
not best beloved of my heart said i think not that this motion 
which you may believe to be so contrary to your former injunctions 
proceeds from a design to avail myself of the cruelty of your relations 
if i have disobliged you by it and you know with what respectful
tenderness i have presumed to hint it it shall be my utmost care for
the future there i stopped 

then she spoke but with vexation i am i am very unhappy tears
trickling down her crimson cheeks and her sweet face as my arms still
encircled the finest waist in the world sinking upon my shoulder the
dear creature so absent that she knew not the honour she permitted me 

but why but why unhappy my dearest life said i all the gratitude
that ever overflowed the heart of the most obliged of men 

justice to myself there stopped my mouth for what gratitude did i owe
her for obligations so involuntary 

then recovering herself and her usual reserves and struggling to free
herself from my clasping arms how now sir said she with a cheek more
indignantly glowing and eyes of fiercer lustre 

i gave way to her angry struggle but absolutely overcome by so
charming a display of innocent confusion i caught hold of her hand as
she was flying from me and kneeling at her fee o my angel said i 
 quite destitute of reserve and hardly knowing the tenor of my own
speech and had a parson been there i had certainly been a gone man 
receive the vows of your faithful lovelace make him yours and only
yours for ever this will answer every end who will dare to form plots
and stratagems against my wife that you are not so is the ground of
all their foolish attempts and of their insolent hopes in solmes's
favour o be mine i beseech you thus on my knee i beseech you to
be mine we shall then have all the world with us and every body will
applaud an event that every body expects 

was the devil in me i no more intended all this ecstatic nonsense than
i thought the same moment of flying in the air all power is with this
charming creature it is i not she at this rate that must fail in the
arduous trial 

didst thou ever before hear of a man uttering solemn things by an
involuntary impulse in defiance of premeditation and of all his proud
schemes but this sweet creature is able to make a man forego every
purpose of his heart that is not favourable to her and i verily think
i should be inclined to spare her all further trial and yet what trial
has she had were it not for the contention that her vigilance has set
on foot which shall overcome the other thou knowest my generosity
to my uncontending rosebud and sometimes do i qualify my
ardent aspirations after even this very fine creature by this
reflection that the most charming woman on earth were she an empress 
can excel the meanest in the customary visibles only such is the
equality of the dispensation to the prince and the peasant in this
prime gift woman 

well but what was the result of this involuntary impulse on my
part wouldst thou not think i was taken at my offer an offer so
solemnly made and on one knee too 

no such thing the pretty trifler let me off as easily as i could have
wished 

her brother's project and to find that there were no hopes of a
reconciliation for her and the apprehension she had of the mischiefs
that might ensue these not my offer nor love of me were the causes
to which she ascribed all her sweet confusion an ascription that is
high treason against my sovereign pride to make marriage with me but
a second-place refuge and as good as to tell me that her confusion
was owing to her concern that there were no hopes that my enemies would
accept of her intended offer to renounce a man who had ventured his life
for her and was still ready to run the same risque in her behalf 

i re-urged her to make me happy but i was to be postponed to her cousin
morden's arrival on him are now placed all her hopes 

i raved but to no purpose 

another letter was to be sent or had been sent to her aunt hervey to
which she hoped an answer 

yet sometimes i think that fainter and fainter would have been her
procrastinations had i been a man of courage but so fearful was i of
offending 

a confounded thing the man to be so bashful the woman to want so much
courting how shall two such come together no kind mediatress in the
way 

but i must be contented tis seldom however that a love so ardent as
mine meets with a spirit so resigned in the same person but true love 
i am now convinced only wishes nor has it any active will but that of
the adored object 

but o the charming creature again of herself to mention london had
singleton's plot been of my own contriving a more happy expedient could
not have been thought of to induce her to resume her purpose of going
thither nor can i divine what could be her reason for postponing it 

i enclose the letter from joseph leman which i mentioned to thee in
mine of monday last with my answer to it i cannot resist the vanity
that urges me to the communication otherwise it were better perhaps 
that i suffer thee to imagine that this lady's stars fight against
her and dispense the opportunities in my favour which are only the
consequences of my own invention 




letter xlvii

to robert lovelace esq his honner sat april 15 


may it please your honner 

this is to let you honner kno' as how i have been emploied in a bisness
i would have been excused from if so be i could for it is to gitt
evidense from a young man who has of late com'd out to be my cuzzen
by my grandmother's side and but lately come to live in these partes 
about a very vile thing as younge master calls it relating to your
honner god forbid i should call it so without your leafe it is not for
so plane a man as i be to tacks my betters it is consarning one miss
batirton of notingam a very pretty crature belike 

your honner got her away it seems by a false letter to her macking
believe as how her she-cuzzen that she derely loved was coming to see
her and was tacken ill upon the rode and so miss batirton set out in
a shase and one sarvant to fet her cuzzen from the inne where she laid
sick as she thote and the sarvant was tricked and braute back the
shase but miss batirton was not harde of for a month or so and
when it came to passe that her frends founde her out and would have
prossekutid your honner your honner was gone abroad and so she was
broute to bed as one may say before your honner's return and she got
colde in her lyin-inn and lanquitched and soon died and the child is
living but your honner never troubles your honner's hedd about it
in the least and this and some other matters of verry bad reporte 
squier solmes was to tell my young lady of if so be she would have
harde him speke before we lost her sweet company as i may say from
heere 


 see vol ii letters xv and xvi 


your honner helped me to many ugly stories to tell against you honner to
my younge master and younge mistriss but did not tell me about this 

i most humbelly beseche your honner to be good and kinde and fethful to
my deerest younge lady now you have her or i shall brake my harte for
having done some dedes that have helped to bringe things to this passe 
pray youre dere good honner be just prayey do as god shall love ye 
prayey do i cannot write no more for this pressent for verry fear and
grief 

but now i am cumm'd to my writing agen will your honner be pleased to
tell me if as how there be any danger to your honner's life from this
bisness for my cuzzen is actile hier'd to go down to miss batirton's
frendes to see if they will stir in it for you must kno' your honner 
as how he lived in the batirton family at the time and could be a good
evidense and all that 

i hope it was not so verry bad as titus says it was for he ses as
how there was a rape in the case betwixt you at furste and plese your
honner and my cuzzen titus is a very honist younge man as ever brocke
bred this is his carackter and this made me willinger to owne him for
my relation when we came to talck 

if there should be danger of your honner's life i hope your honner will
not be hanged like as one of us common men only have your hedd cut off 
or so and yet it is pit such a hedd should be lossed but if as how
it should be prossekutid to that furr which god forbid be plesed
natheless to thinck of youre fethful joseph leman before your hedd be
condemned for after condemnation as i have been told all will be the
king's or the shreeve's 

i thote as how it was best to acquent you honner of this and for you
to let me kno' if i could do any think to sarve your honner and prevent
mischief with my cuzzen titus on his coming back from nottingam before
he mackes his reporte 

i have gin him a hint already for what as i sed to him cuzzen titus 
signifies stirring up the coles and macking of strife to make rich
gentilfolkes live at varience and to be cutting of throtes and
such-like 

very trewe sed little titus and this and plese your honner gis
me hopes of him if so be your honner gis me direction sen' as god
kno'es i have a poor a verry poor invenshon only a willing mind to
prevent mischief that is the chief of my aim and always was i bless
my god els i could have made much mischief in my time as indeed
any sarvant may your honner nathaless praises my invenshon every
now-and-then alas and plese your honner what invenshon should such a
plane man as i have but when your honner sets me agoing by your fine
invenshon i can do well enuff and i am sure i have a hearty good will
to deserve your honner's faver if i mought 

two days as i may say off and on have i been writing this long
letter and yet i have not sed all i would say for be it knone unto
your honner as how i do not like that captain singleton which i told
you of in my last two letters he is always laying his hedd and my young
master's hedd together and i suspect much if so be some mischief is not
going on between them and still the more as because my eldest younge
lady seemes to be joined to them sometimes 

last week my younge master sed before my fase my harte's blood boils
over capten singleton for revenge upon this and he called your honner
by a name it is not for such a won as me to say what capten singleton
whispred my younge master being i was by so young master sed you may
say any thing before joseph for althoff he looks so seelie he has as
good a harte and as good a hedd as any sarvante in the world need to
have my conscience touched me just then but why shoulde it when all i
do is to prevent mischeff and seeing your honner has so much patience 
which younge master has not so am not affeard of telling your honner
any thing whatsomever 

and furthermore i have such a desire to desarve your honner's bounty
to me as mackes me let nothing pass i can tell you of to prevent harm 
and too besides your honner's goodness about the blew bore which i
have so good an accounte of i am sure i shall be bounden to bless your
honner the longest day i have to live 

and then the blew bore is not all neither sen' and please your honner 
the pretty sowe god forgive me for gesting in so serus a matter runs
in my hedd likewise i believe i shall love her mayhap more than your
honner would have me for she begins to be kind and good-humered and
listens and plese your honour licke as if she was among beans when i
talke about the blew bore and all that 

prayey your honner forgive the gesting of a poor plane man we common
fokes have our joys and plese your honner lick as our betters have 
and if we be sometimes snubbed we can find our underlings to snub them
agen and if not we can get a wife mayhap and snub her so are masters
some how or other oursells 

but how i try your honner's patience sarvants will shew their joyful
hartes tho' off but in partinens when encourag'd 

be plesed from the prems's to let me kno' if as how i can be put upon
any sarvice to sarve your honner and to sarve my deerest younge lady 
which god grant for i begin to be affearde for her hearing what peple
talck to be sure your honner will not do her no harme as a man may
say but i kno' your honner must be good to so wonderous a younge lady 
how can you help it but here my conscience smites me that but for
some of my stories which your honner taute me my old master and my
old lady and the two old squires would not have been able to be half
so hardhearted as they be for all my younge master and younge mistress
sayes 

and here is the sad thing they cannot come to clere up matters with my
deerest young lady because as your honner has ordered it they have
these stories as if bribed by me out of your honner's sarvant which
must not be known for fere you should kill'n and me too and blacken the
briber ah your honner i doubte as tha i am a very vild fellow lord
bless my soil i pray god and did not intend it 

but if my deerest younge lady should come to harm and plese your
honner the horsepond at the blew bore but lord preserve us all from
all bad mischeff and all bad endes i pray the lord for tho'ff you
honner is kinde to me in worldly pelf yet what shall a man get to loos
his soul as holy skrittuer says and plese your honner 

but natheless i am in hope of reppentence hereafter being but a younge
man if i do wrong thro' ignorens your honner being a grate man and a
grave wit and i a poor crature not worthy notice and your honner able
to answer for all but howsomever i am

your honner's fetheful sarvant in all dewtie joseph leman 

april 15 and 16 




letter xlviii

mr lovelace to joseph leman monday april 17 


honest joseph 

you have a worse opinion of your invention than you ought to have 
i must praise it again of a plain man's head i have not known many
better than yours how often have your forecast and discretion answered
my wishes in cases which i could not foresee not knowing how my general
directions would succeed or what might happen in the execution of them 
you are too doubtful of your own abilities honest joseph that's your
fault but it being a fault that is owing to natural modesty you ought
rather to be pitied for it than blamed 

the affair of miss betterton was a youthful frolic i love dearly to
exercise my invention i do assure you joseph that i have ever had
more pleasure in my contrivances than in the end of them i am no
sensual man but a man of spirit one woman is like another you
understand me joseph in coursing all the sport is made by the
winding hare a barn-door chick is better eating now you take me 
joseph 

miss betterton was but a tradesman's daughter the family indeed was
grown rich and aimed at a new line of gentry and were unreasonable
enough to expect a man of my family would marry her i was honest 
i gave the young lady no hope of that for she put it to me she
resented kept up and was kept up a little innocent contrivance was
necessary to get her out but no rape in the case i assure you joseph 
she loved me i loved her indeed when i got her to the inn i asked
her no question it is cruel to ask a modest woman for her consent it
is creating difficulties to both had not her friends been officious i
had been constant and faithful to her to this day as far as i know for
then i had not known my angel 

i went not abroad upon her account she loved me too well to have
appeared against me she refused to sign a paper they had drawn up for
her to found a prosecution upon and the brutal creatures would not
permit the mid-wife's assistance till her life was in danger and i
believe to this her death was owing 

i went into mourning for her though abroad at the time a distinction i
have ever paid to those worthy creatures who dies in childbed by me 

i was ever nice in my loves these were the rules i laid down to myself
on my entrance into active life to set the mother above want if her
friends were cruel and if i could not get her a husband worthy of her 
to shun common women a piece of justice i owed to innocent ladies as
well as to myself to marry off a former mistress if possible before
i took to a new one to maintain a lady handsomely in her lying-in to
provide for the little-one if it lived according to the degree of its
mother to go into mourning for the mother if she died and the promise
of this was a great comfort to the pretty dears as they grew near their
times 

all my errors all my expenses have been with and upon women so i
could acquit my conscience acting thus honourably by them as well as
my discretion as to point of fortune 

all men love women and find me a man of more honour in these points 
if you can joseph 

no wonder the sex love me as they do 

but now i am strictly virtuous i am reformed so i have been for a
long time resolving to marry as soon as i can prevail upon the most
admirable of women to have me i think of nobody else it is impossible
i should i have spared very pretty girls for her sake very true 
joseph so set your honest heart at rest you see the pains i take to
satisfy your qualms 

but as to miss betterton no rape in the case i repeat rapes are
unnatural things and more are than are imagined joseph i should be
loth to be put to such a streight i never was miss betterton was taken
from me against her own will in that case her friends not i committed
the rape 

i have contrived to see the boy twice unknown to the aunt who
takes care of him loves him and would not now part with him on any
consideration the boy is a fine boy i thank god no father need be
ashamed of him he will be well provided for if not i would take
care of him he will have his mother's fortune they curse the father 
ungrateful wretches but bless the boy upon the whole there is nothing
vile in this matter on my side a great deal on the bettertons 

wherefore joseph be not thou in pain either for my head or for thy
own neck nor for the blue boar nor for the pretty sow 

i love your jesting jesting better becomes a poor man than qualms 
i love to have you jest all we say all we do all we wish for is
a jest he that makes life itself not so is a sad fellow and has the
worst of it 

i doubt not joseph but you have had your joys as you say as well
as your betters may you have more and more honest joseph he
that grudges a poor man joy ought to have none himself jest on 
therefore jesting i repeat better becomes thee than qualms 

i had no need to tell you of miss betterton did i not furnish you with
stories enough without hers against myself to augment your credit
with your cunning masters besides i was loth to mention miss
betterton her friends being all living and in credit i loved her
too for she was taken from me by her cruel friends while our joys were
young 

but enough of dear miss betterton dear i say for death
endears rest to her worthy soul there joseph off went a deep sigh
to the memory of miss betterton 

as to the journey of little titus i now recollect the fellow by his
name let that take its course a lady dying in childbed eighteen
months ago no process begun in her life-time refusing herself to give
evidence against me while she lived pretty circumstances to found an
indictment for a rape upon 

as to your young lady the ever-admirable miss clarissa harlowe i
always courted her for a wife others rather expected marriage from
the vanity of their own hearts than from my promises for i was always
careful of what i promised you know joseph that i have gone beyond my
promises to you i do to every body and why because it is the best
way of showing that i have no grudging or narrow spirit a promise is
an obligation a just man will keep his promise a generous man will go
beyond it this is my rule 

if you doubt my honour to your young lady it is more than she does she
would not stay with me an hour if she did mine is the steadiest
heart in the world hast thou not reason to think it so why this
squeamishness then honest joseph 

but it is because thou art honest so i forgive thee whoever loves my
divine clarissa loves me 

let james harlowe call me what names he will for his sister's sake i
will bear them do not be concerned for me her favour will make me rich
amends his own vilely malicious heart will make his blood boil over
at any time and when it does thinkest thou that i will let it touch
thine ah joseph joseph what a foolish teaser is thy conscience such
a conscience as gives a plain man trouble when he intends to do for the
best is weakness not conscience 

but say what thou wilt write all thou knowest or hearest of to me i'll
have patience with every body why should i not when it is as much the
desire of my heart as it is of thine to prevent mischief 

so now joseph having taken all this pains to satisfy thy conscience 
and answer all thy doubts and to banish all thy fears let me come to a
new point 

your endeavours and mine which were designed by round-about ways to
reconcile all even against the wills of the most obstinate have
not we see answered the end we hoped they would answer but on the
contrary have widened the differences between our families but this
has not been either your fault or mine it is owing to the black 
pitch-like blood of your venomous-hearted young master boiling over as
he owns that our honest wishes have hitherto been frustrated 

yet we must proceed in the same course we shall tire them out in time 
and they will propose terms and when they do they shall find out how
reasonable mine shall be little as they deserve from me 

persevere therefore joseph honest joseph persevere and unlikely as
you may imagine the means our desires will at last be obtained 

we have nothing for it now but to go through with our work in the way
we have begun for since as i told you in my last my beloved mistrusts
you she will blow you up if she be not mine if she be i can and
will protect you and as if there will be any fault in her opinion 
it will be rather mine than yours she must forgive you and keep her
husband's secrets for the sake of his reputation else she will be
guilty of a great failure in her duty so now you have set your hand to
the plough joseph there is no looking back 

and what is the consequence of all this one labour more and that will
be all that will fall to your lot at least of consequence 

my beloved is resolved not to think of marriage till she has tried
to move her friends to a reconciliation with her you know they are
determined not to be reconciled she has it in her head i doubt not 
to make me submit to the people i hate and if i did they would rather
insult me than receive my condescension as they ought she even owns 
that she will renounce me if they insist upon it provided they will
give up solmes so to all appearance i am still as far as ever from
the happiness of calling her mine indeed i am more likely than ever to
lose her if i cannot contrive some way to avail myself of the present
critical situation and then joseph all i have been studying and all
you have been doing will signify nothing 

at the place where we are we cannot long be private the lodgings
are inconvenient for us while both together and while she refuses
to marry she wants to get me at a distance from her there are
extraordinary convenient lodgings in my eye in london where we
could be private and all mischief avoided when there if i get
her thither she will insist that i leave her miss howe is for ever
putting her upon contrivances that you know is the reason i have been
obliged by your means to play the family off at harlowe-place upon
mrs howe and mrs howe upon her daughter ah joseph little need for
your fears for my angel i only am in danger but were i the free-liver
i am reported to be all this could i get over with a wet finger as the
saying is 

but by the help of one of your hints i have thought of an expedient
which will do ever thing and raise your reputation though already
so high higher still this singleton i hear is a fellow who loves
enterprising the view he has to get james harlowe to be his principal
owner in a large vessel which he wants to be put into the command of 
may be the subject of their present close conversation but since he
is taught to have so good an opinion of you joseph cannot you still
pretending an abhorrence of me and of my contrivances propose to
singleton to propose to james harlowe who so much thirsts for revenge
upon me to assist him with his whole ship's crew upon occasion to
carry off his sister to leith where both have houses or elsewhere 

you may tell them that if this can be effected it will make me raving
mad and bring your young lady into all their measures 

you can inform them as from my servant of the distance she keeps me
at in hopes of procuring her father's forgiveness by cruelly giving me
up if insisted upon 

you can tell them that as the only secret my servant has kept from you
is the place we are in you make no doubt that a two-guinea bribe will
bring that out and also an information when i shall be at a distance
from her that the enterprise may be conducted with safety 

you may tell them still as from my servant that we are about to
remove from inconvenient lodgings to others more convenient which is
true and that i must be often absent from her 

if they listen to your proposal you will promote your interest with
betty by telling it to her as a secret betty will tell arabella of
it arabella will be overjoyed at any thing that will help forward her
revenge upon me and will reveal it if her brother do not to her uncle
antony he probably will whisper it to mrs howe she can keep nothing
from her daughter though they are always jangling her daughter will
acquaint my beloved with it and if it will not or if it will come to
my ears from some of those you can write it to me as in confidence by
way of preventing msicheif which is the study of us both 

i can then show it to my beloved then will she be for placing a greater
confidence in me that will convince me of her love which i am now
sometimes ready to doubt she will be for hastening to the safer
lodgings i shall have a pretence to stay about her person as a guard 
she will be convinced that there is no expectation to be had of a
reconciliation you can give james harlowe and singleton continual false
scents as i shall direct you so that no mischief can possibly happen 

and what will be the happy happy thrice happy consequence the lady
will be mine in an honourable way we shall all be friends in good time 
the two guineas will be an agreeable addition to the many gratuities i
have helped you to by the like contrivances from this stingy family 
your reputation both for head and heart as i hinted before will be
heightened the blue boar also will be yours nor shall you have the
least difficulty about raising money to buy the stock if it be worth
your while to have it 

betty will likewise then be yours you have both saved money it seems 
the whole harlowe family whom you have so faithfully served  'tis
serving them surely to prevent the mischief which their violent
son would have brought upon them   will throw you in somewhat towards
housekeeping i will still add to your store so nothing but happiness
before you 

crow joseph crow a dunghill of thy own in view servants to snub at
thy pleasure a wife to quarrel with or to love as thy humour leads
thee landlord and landlady at every word to be paid instead of
paying for thy eating and drinking but not thus happy only in thyself 
happy in promoting peace and reconciliation between two good families 
in the long run without hurting any christian soul o joseph honest
joseph what envy wilt thou raise and who would be squeamish with such
prospects before him 

this one labour i repeat crowns the work if you can get but such a
design entertained by them whether they prosecute it or not it will be
equally to the purpose of

your loving friend r lovelace 




letter xlix

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs hervey  enclosed in her last to miss
howe   thursday april 20 


honoured madam 

having not had the favour of an answer to a letter i took the liberty
to write to you on the 14th i am in some hopes that it may have
miscarried for i had much rather it should than to have the
mortification to think that my aunt hervey deemed me unworthy of the
honour of her notice 

in this hope having kept a copy of it and not become able to express
myself in terms better suited to the unhappy circumstances of things i
transcribe and enclose what i then wrote and i humbly beseech you to
favour the contents of it with your interest 


 the contents of the letter referred to are given in letter xxiv of
this volume 


hitherto it is in my power to perform what i undertake for in this
letter and it would be very grievous to me to be precipitated upon
measures which may render the desirable reconciliation more difficult 

if madam i were permitted to write to you with the hopes of being
answered i could clear my intention with regard to the step i have
taken although i could not perhaps acquit myself to some of my severest
judges of an imprudence previous to it you i am sure would pity me 
if you knew all i could say and how miserable i am in the forfeiture of
the good opinion of all my friends 

i flatter myself that their favour is yet retrievable but whatever be
the determination at harlowe-place do not you my dearest aunt deny
me the favour of a few lines to inform me if there can be any hope of
a reconciliation upon terms less shocking than those heretofore
endeavoured to be imposed upon me or if which god forbid i am to be
for ever reprobated 

at least my dear aunt procure for me the justice of my wearing
apparel and the little money and other things which i wrote to my
sister for and mention in the enclosed to you that i may not be
destitute of common conveniencies or be under a necessity to owe an
obligation for such where at present however i would least of all
owe it 

allow me to say that had i designed what happened i might as to the
money and jewels at least have saved myself some of the mortification
which i have suffered and which i still further apprehend if my
request be not complied with 

if you are permitted to encourage an eclaircissment of what i hint i
will open my whole heart to you and inform you of every thing 

if it be any pleasure to have me mortified be pleased to let it be
known that i am extremely mortified and yet it is entirely from my
own reflections that i am so having nothing to find fault with in the
behaviour of the person from whom every evil was to be apprehended 

the bearer having business your way will bring me your answer on
saturday morning if you favour me according to my hopes i knew not
that i should have this opportunity till i had written the above 

i am my dearest aunt your ever dutiful cl harlowe 

be pleased to direct for me if i am to be favoured with a few lines to
be left at mr osgood's near soho-square and nobody shall ever know of
your goodness to me if you desire it to be kept a secret 




letter l

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe saturday april 22 


i cannot for my life account for your wretch's teasing ways but he
certainly doubts your love of him in this he is a modest man as well
as somebody else and tacitly confesses that he does not deserve it 

your israelitish hankerings after the egyptian onion testified still
more in your letter to your aunt your often repeated regrets for
meeting him for being betrayed by him these he cannot bear 

i have been looking back on the whole of his conduct and comparing it
with his general character and find that he is more consistently more
uniformly mean revengeful and proud than either of us once imagined 

from his cradle as i may say as an only child and a boy humoursome 
spoiled mischievous the governor of his governors 

a libertine in his riper years hardly regardful of appearances and
despising the sex in general for the faults of particulars of it who
made themselves too cheap to him 

what has been his behaviour in your family a clarissa in view from
the time your foolish brother was obliged to take a life from him 
but defiance for defiances getting you into his power by terror by
artifice what politeness can be expected from such a man 

well but what in such a situation is to be done why you must
despise him you must hate him if you can and run away from him but
whither whither indeed now that your brother is laying foolish plots
to put you in a still worse condition as it may happen 

but if you cannot despise and hate him if you care not to break with
him you must part with some punctilio's and if the so doing bring
not on the solemnity you must put yourself into the protection of the
ladies of his family 

their respect for you is of itself a security for his honour to you if
there could be any room for doubt and at least you should remind him
of his offer to bring one of the miss montagues to attend you at your
new lodgings in town and accompany you till all is happily over 

this you'll say will be as good as declaring yourself to be his and
so let it you ought not now to think of any thing else but to be his 
does not your brother's project convince you more and more of this 

give over then my dearest friend any thoughts of this hopeless
reconciliation which has kept you balancing thus long you own in the
letter before me that he made very explicit offers though you give me
not the very words and he gave his reasons i perceive with his wishes
that you should accept them which very few of the sorry fellows do 
whose plea is generally but a compliment to our self-love that we must
love them however presumptuous and unworthy because they love us 

were i in your place and had your charming delicacies i should 
perhaps do as you do no doubt but i should expect that the man
should urge me with respectful warmth that he should supplicate with
constancy and that all his words and actions should tend to the one
principal point nevertheless if i suspected art or delay founded upon
his doubts of my love i would either condescend to clear up is doubts
or renounce him for ever 

and in my last case i your anna howe would exert myself and either
find you a private refuge or resolve to share fortunes with you 

what a wretch to be so easily answered by your reference to the arrival
of your cousin morden but i am afraid that you was too scrupulous for
did he not resent that reference 

could we have his account of the matter i fancy my dear i should
think you over nice over delicate had you laid hold of his
acknowledged explicitness he would have been as much in your power as
now you seem to be in his you wanted not to be told that the person
who had been tricked into such a step as you had taken must of
necessity submit to many mortifications 


 the reader who has seen his account which miss howe could not have
seen when she wrote thus will observe that it was not possible for a
person of her true delicacy of mind to act otherwise than she did to a
man so cruelly and so insolently artful 


but were it to me a girl of spirit as i am thought to be i do assure
you i would in a quarter of an hour all the time i would allow to
punctilio in such a case as yours know what he drives at since either
he must mean well or ill if ill the sooner you know it the better if
well whose modesty is it he distresses but that of his own wife 

and methinks you should endeavour to avoid all exasperating
recriminations as to what you have heard of his failure in morals 
especially while you are so happy as not to have occasion to speak of
them by experience 

i grant that it gives a worthy mind some satisfaction in having borne
its testimony against the immoralities of a bad one but that correction
which is unseasonably given is more likely either to harden or make an
hypocrite than to reclaim 

i am pleased however as well as you with his making light of your
brother's wise project poor creature and must master jemmy harlowe 
with his half-wit pretend to plot and contrive mischief yet rail at
lovelace for the same things a witty villain deserves hanging at once
 and without ceremony if you please but a half-witted one deserves
broken bones first and hanging afterwards i think lovelace has given
his character in a few words 


 see letter xlv of this volume 


be angry at me if you please but as sure as you are alive now that
this poor creature whom some call your brother finds he has succeeded
in making you fly your father's house and that he has nothing to fear
but your getting into your own and into an independence of him 
he thinks himself equal to any thing and so he has a mind to fight
lovelace with his own weapons 

don't you remember his pragmatical triumph as told you by your aunt 
and prided in by that saucy betty barnes from his own foolish mouth 


 see vol ii letter xlvii 


i expect nothing from your letter to your aunt i hope lovelace will
never know the contents of it in every one of yours i see that he
as warmly resents as he dares the little confidence you have in him i
should resent it too were i he and knew that i deserved better 

don't be scrupulous about clothes if you think of putting yourself into
the protection of the ladies of his family they know how matters stand
between you and your relations and love you never the worse for the
silly people's cruelty 

i know you won't demand possession of your estate but give him a right
to demand it for you and that will be still better 

adieu my dear may heaven guide and direct you in all your steps is
the daily prayer of

your ever affectionate and faithful anna howe 




letter li

mr belford to robert lovelace esq friday april 21 


thou lovelace hast been long the entertainer i the entertained nor
have i been solicitous to animadvert as thou wentest along upon thy
inventions and their tendency for i believed that with all thy airs 
the unequalled perfections and fine qualities of this lady would always
be her protection and security but now that i find thou hast so far
succeeded as to induce her to come to town and to choose her lodgings
in a house the people of which will too probably damp and suppress any
honourable motions which may arise in thy mind in her favour i cannot
help writing and that professedly in her behalf 

my inducements to this are not owing to virtue but if they were what
hope could i have of affecting thee by pleas arising from it 

nor would such a man as thou art be deterred were i to remind thee
of the vengeance which thou mayest one day expect if thou insultest a
woman of her character family and fortune 

neither are gratitude and honour motives to be mentioned in a woman's
favour to men such as we are who consider all those of the sex as
fair prize over honour in the general acceptation of the word are two
things 

what then is my motive what but the true friendship that i bear thee 
lovelace which makes me plead thy own sake and thy family's sake in
the justice thou owest to this incomparable creature who however 
so well deserves to have her sake to be mentioned as the principal
consideration 

last time i was at m hall thy noble uncle so earnestly pressed me to
use my interest to persuade thee to enter the pale and gave me so many
family reasons for it that i could not help engaging myself heartily
on his side of the question and the rather as i knew that thy own
intentions with regard to this fine woman were then worthy of her and
of this i assured his lordship who was half afraid of thee because of
the ill usage thou receivedst from her family but now that the case is
altered let me press the matter home to thee from other considerations 

by what i have heard of this lady's perfections from every mouth as
well as from thine and from every letter thou hast written where
wilt thou find such another woman and why shouldst thou tempt her
virtue why shouldst thou wish to try where there is no reason to
doubt 

were i in thy case and designed to marry and if i preferred a woman
as i know thou dost this to all the women in the world i should read
to make further trial knowing what we know of the sex for fear of
succeeding and especially if i doubted not that if there were a woman
in the world virtuous at heart it is she 

and let me tell thee lovelace that in this lady's situation the
trial is not a fair trial considering the depth of thy plots and
contrivances considering the opportunities which i see thou must have
with her in spite of her own heart all her relations' follies acting
in concert though unknown to themselves with thy wicked scheming
head considering how destitute of protection she is considering the
house she is to be in where she will be surrounded with thy implements 
specious well-bred and genteel creatures not easily to be detected
when they are disposed to preserve appearances especially by the young
inexperienced lady wholly unacquainted with the town considering all
these things i say what glory what cause of triumph wilt thou have 
if she should be overcome thou too a man born for intrigue full
of invention intrepid remorseless able patiently to watch for thy
opportunity not hurried as most men by gusts of violent passion 
which often nip a project in the bud and make the snail that was just
putting out his horns to meet the inviter withdraw into its shell a
man who has no regard to his word or oath to the sex the lady
scrupulously strict to her word incapable of art or design apt
therefore to believe well of others it would be a miracle if she stood
such an attempter such attempts and such snares as i see will be
laid for her and after all i see not when men are so frail without
importunity that so much should be expected from women daughters of
the same fathers and mothers and made up of the same brittle compounds 
 education all the difference nor where the triumph is in subduing
them 

may there not be other lovelaces thou askest who attracted by her
beauty may endeavour to prevail with her 


 see letter xviii of this volume 


no there cannot i answer be such another man person mind fortune 
and thy character as above given taken in if thou imaginest there
could such is thy pride that thou wouldst think the worse of thyself 

but let me touch upon thy predominant passion revenge for love is but
second to that as i have often told thee though it has set thee into
raving at me what poor pretences for revenge are the difficulties thou
hadst in getting her off allowing that she had run a risque of being
solmes's wife had she staid if these are other than pretences why
thankest thou not those who by their persecutions of her answered thy
hopes and threw her into thy power besides are not the pretences
thou makest for further trial most ungratefully as well as
contradictorily founded upon the supposition of error in her occasioned
by her favour to thee 

and let me for the utter confusion of thy poor pleas of this nature 
ask thee would she in thy opinion had she willingly gone off with
thee have been entitled to better quarter for a mistress indeed she
might but how wouldst thou for a wife have had cause to like her half
so well as now 

has she not demonstrated that even the highest provocations were not
sufficient to warp her from her duty to her parents though a native 
and as i may say an originally involuntary duty because native and
is not this a charming earnest that she will sacredly observe a still
higher duty into which she proposes to enter when she does enter by
plighted vows and entirely as a volunteer 

that she loves thee wicked as thou art and cruel as a panther there
is no reason to doubt yet what a command has she over herself that
such a penetrating self-flatterer as thyself is sometimes ready to doubt
it though persecuted on the one hand as she was by her own family 
and attracted on the other by the splendour of thine every one of
whom courts her to rank herself among them 

thou wilt perhaps think that i have departed from my proposition and
pleaded the lady's sake more than thine in the above but no such
thing all that i have written is more in thy behalf than in her's 
since she may make thee happy but it is next to impossible i should
think if she preserve her delicacy that thou canst make her so what
is the love of a rakish heart there cannot be peculiarity in it but i
need not give my further reasons thou wilt have ingenuousness enough i
dare say were there occasion for it to subscribe to my opinion 

i plead not for the state from any great liking to it myself nor have
i at present thoughts of entering into it but as thou art the last
of thy name as thy family is of note and figure in thy country and as
thou thyself thinkest that thou shalt one day marry is it possible let
me ask thee that thou canst have such another opportunity as thou now
hast if thou lettest this slip a woman in her family and fortune not
unworthy of thine own though thou art so apt from pride of ancestry 
and pride of heart to speak slightly of the families thou dislikest 
so celebrated for beauty and so noted at the same time for prudence 
for soul i will say instead of sense and for virtue 

if thou art not so narrow-minded an elf as to prefer thine own single
satisfaction to posterity thou who shouldst wish to beget children for
duration wilt not postpone till the rake's usual time that is to say 
till diseases or years or both lay hold of thee since in that case
thou wouldst entitle thyself to the curses of thy legitimate progeny
for giving them a being altogether miserable a being which they will
be obliged to hold upon a worse tenure than that tenant-courtesy 
which thou callest the worst to wit upon the doctor's courtesy 
thy descendants also propagating if they shall live and be able to
propagate a wretched race that shall entail the curse or the reason
for it upon remote generations 

wicked as the sober world accounts you and me we have not yet it is
to be hoped got over all compunction although we find religion against
us we have not yet presumed those who do and we know better than to
be even doubters in short we believe a future state of rewards and
punishments but as we have so much youth and health in hand we hope to
have time for repentance that is to say in plain english  nor think
thou me too grave lovelace thou art grave sometimes though not
often   we hope to live to sense as long as sense can relish and
purpose to reform when we can sin no longer 

and shall this admirable woman suffer for her generous endeavours to set
on foot thy reformation and for insisting upon proofs of the sincerity
of thy professions before she will be thine 

upon the whole matter let me wish thee to consider well what thou art
about before thou goest a step farther in the path which thou hast
chalked out for thyself to tread and art just going to enter upon 
hitherto all is so far right that if the lady mistrusts thy honour she
has no proofs be honest to her then in her sense of the word none of
thy companions thou knowest will offer to laugh at what thou dost 
and if they should of thy entering into a state which has been so much
ridiculed by thee and by all of us thou hast one advantage it is
this that thou canst not be ashamed 

deferring to the post-day to close my letter i find one left at my
cousin osgood's with directions to be forwarded to the lady it
was brought within these two hours by a particular hand and has a
harlowe-seal upon it as it may therefore be of importance i dispatch
it with my own by my servant post-haste 


 this letter was from miss arabella harlowe see let lv 


i suppose you will soon be in town without the lady i hope farewell 

be honest and be happy j belford 

sat april 22 




letter lii

mrs hervey to miss clarissa harlowe  in answer to letter xviii  


dear niece 

it would be hard not to write a few lines so much pressed to write to
one i ever loved your former letter i received yet was not at liberty
to answer it i break my word to answer you now 

strange informations are every day received about you the wretch you
are with we are told is every hour triumphing and defying must not
these informations aggravate you know the uncontroulableness of the
man he loves his own humour better than he loves you though so fine a
creature as you are i warned you over and over no young lady was ever
more warned miss clarissa harlowe to do such a thing 

you might have given your friends the meeting if you had held your
aversion it would have been complied with as soon as i was intrusted
myself with their intention to give up the point i gave you a hint a
dark one perhaps but who would have thought o miss such an artful
flight such cunning preparations 

but you want to clear up things what can you clear up are you not gone
off with a lovelace too what my dear would you clear up 

you did not design to go you say why did you meet him then chariot
and six horsemen all prepared by him o my dear how art produces
art will it be believed if it would what power will he be
thought to have had over you he who lovelace the vilest of
libertines over whom a clarissa was your love for such a man above
your reason above your resolution what credit would a belief of this 
if believed bring you how mend the matter oh that you had stood
the next morning 

i'll tell you all that was intended if you had 

it was indeed imagined that you would not have been able to resist
your father's entreaties and commands he was resolved to be all
condescension if anew you had not provoked him i love my clary
harlowe said he but an hour before the killing tidings were brought
him i love her as my life i will kneel to her if nothing else will
do to prevail upon her to oblige me 

your father and mother the reverse of what should have been would
have humbled themselves to you and if you could have denied them and
refused to sign the settlements previous to the meeting they would have
yielded although with regret 

but it was presumed so naturally sweet your temper so self-denying
as they thought you that you could not have withstood them 
notwithstanding all your dislike of the one man without a greater
degree of headstrong passion for the other than you had given any of us
reason to expect from you 

if you had the meeting on wednesday would have been a lighter trial to
you you would have been presented to all your assembled friends with
a short speech only that this was the young creature till very lately
faultless condescending and obliging now having cause to glory in a
triumph over the wills of father mother uncles the most indulgent 
over family-interests family-views and preferring her own will to
every body's and this for a transitory preference to person only there
being no comparison between the men in their morals 

thus complied with and perhaps blessed by your father and mother and
the consequences of your disobedience deprecated in the solemnest manner
by your inimitable mother your generosity would have been appealed to 
since your duty would have been fount too weak an inducement and you
would have been bid to withdraw for one half hour's consideration then
would the settlements have been again tendered for your signing by
the person least disobliging to you by your good norton perhaps she
perhaps seconded by your father again and if again refused you
would have again have been led in to declare such your refusal some
restrictions which you yourself had proposed would have been insisted
upon you would have been permitted to go home with me or with your
uncle antony with which of us was not agreed upon because they hoped
you might be persuaded there to stay till the arrival of your cousin
morden or till your father could have borne to see you or till assured
that the views of lovelace were at an end 

this the intention your father so set upon your compliance so much in
hopes that you would have yielded that you would have been prevailed
upon by methods so condescending and so gentle no wonder that he in
particular was like a distracted man when he heard of your flight of
your flight so premeditated with your ivy summer-house dinings your
arts to blind me and all of us naughty naughty young creature 

i for my part would not believe it when told of it your uncle hervey
would not believe it we rather expected we rather feared a still more
desperate adventure there could be but one more desperate and i
was readier to have the cascade resorted to than the garden
back-door your mother fainted away while her heart was torn between
the two apprehensions your father poor man your father was
beside himself for near an hour what imprecations what dreadful
imprecations to this day he can hardly bear your name yet can
think of nobody else your merits my dear but aggravate your
fault something of fresh aggravation every hour how can any favour
be expected 

i am sorry for it but am afraid nothing you ask will be complied with 

why mention you my dear the saving you from mortifications who have
gone off with a man what a poor pride is it to stand upon any thing
else 

i dare not open my lips in your favour nobody dare your letter must
stand by itself this has caused me to send it to harlowe-place expect
therefore great severity may you be enabled to support the lot you have
drawn o my dear how unhappy have you made every body can you expect
to be happy your father wishes you had never been born your poor
mother but why should i afflict you there is now no help you must be
changed indeed if you are not very unhappy yourself in the reflections
your thoughtful mind must suggest to you 

you must now make the best of your lot yet not married it seems 

it is in your power you say to perform whatever you shall undertake
to do you may deceive yourself you hope that your reputation and the
favour of your friends may be retrieved never never both i doubt 
if either every offended person and that is all who loved you and are
related to you must join to restore you when can these be of one mind
in a case so notoriously wrong 

it would be very grievous you say to be precipitated upon measures
that may make the desirable reconciliation more difficult is it now my
dear a time for you to be afraid of being precipitated at present 
if ever there can be no thought of reconciliation the upshot of your
precipitation must first be seen there may be murder yet as far as we
know will the man you are with part willingly with you if not what
may be the consequence if he will lord bless me what shall we
think of his reasons for it i will fly this thought i know your
purity but my dear are you not out of all protection are you not
unmarried have you not making your daily prayers useless thrown
yourself into temptation and is not the man the most wicked of
plotters 

you have hitherto you say and i think my dear with an air
unbecoming to your declared penitence no fault to find with the
behaviour of a man from whom every evil was apprehended like caesar to
the roman augur which i heard you tell of who had bid him beware the
ides of march the ides of march said caesar seeing the augur among
the crowd as he marched in state to the senate-house from which he
was never to return alive the ides of march are come but they are not
past the augur replied make the application my dear may you be able
to make this reflection upon his good behaviour to the last of your
knowledge of him may he behave himself better to you than he ever did
to any body else over whom he had power amen 

no answer i beseech you i hope your messenger will not tell any body
that i have written to you and i dare say you will not show what i
have written to mr lovelace for i have written with the less reserve 
depending upon your prudence 

you have my prayers 

my dolly knows not that i write nobody does not even mr hervey 


 notwithstanding what mrs hervey here says it will be hereafter seen
that this severe letter was written in private concert with the
implacable arabella 


dolly would have several times written but having defended your fault
with heat and with a partiality that alarmed us such a fall as
your's my dear must be alarming to all parents she has been
forbidden on pain of losing our favour for ever and this at your
family's request as well as by her father's commands 

you have the poor girl's hourly prayers i will however tell you 
though she knows not what i do as well as those of

your truly afflicted aunt d hervey 

friday april 21 




letter liii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe  with the preceding   sat morn 
april 22 


i have just now received the enclosed from my aunt hervey be pleased 
my dear to keep her secret of having written to the unhappy wretch her
niece 

i may go to london i see or where i will no matter what becomes of
me 

i was the willinger to suspend my journey thither till i heard from
harlowe-place i thought if i could be encouraged to hope for a
reconciliation i would let this man see that he should not have me in
his power but upon my own terms if at all 

but i find i must be his whether i will or not and perhaps through
still greater mortifications than those great ones which i have already
met with and must i be so absolutely thrown upon a man with whom i am
not at all satisfied 

my letter is sent you see to harlowe-place my heart aches for the
reception it may meet with there 

one comfort only arises to me from its being sent that my aunt will
clear herself by the communication from the supposition of having
corresponded with the poor creature whom they have all determine to
reprobate it is no small part of my misfortune that i have weakened the
confidence one dear friend has in another and made one look cool upon
another my poor cousin dolly you see has reason to regret on this
account as well as my aunt miss howe my dear miss howe is but too
sensible of the effects of my fault having had more words with her
mother on my account than ever she had on any other yet the man who
has drawn me into all this evil i must be thrown upon much did i
consider much did i apprehend before my fault supposing i were to be
guilty of it but i saw it not in all its shocking lights 

and now to know that my father an hour before he received the tidings
of my supposed flight owned that he loved me as his life that he would
have been all condescension that he would oh my dear how tender how
mortifyingly tender now in him my aunt need not have been afraid that
it should be known that she has sent me such a letter as this a father
to kneel to his child there would not indeed have been any bearing of
that what i should have done in such a case i know not death
would have been much more welcome to me than such a sight on such an
occasion in behalf of a man so very very disgustful to me but i had
deserve annihilation had i suffered my father to kneel in vain 

yet had but the sacrifice of inclination and personal preference been
all less than kneeling should have been done my duty should have been
the conqueror of my inclination but an aversion an aversion so
very sincere the triumph of a cruel and ambitious brother ever so
uncontroulable joined with the insults of an envious sister bringing
wills to theirs which otherwise would have been favourable to me the
marriage-duties so absolutely indispensable so solemnly to be engaged
for the marriage-intimacies permit me to say to you my friend what
the purest although with apprehension must think of so very
intimate myself one who has never looked upon any duty much less a
voluntary-vowed one with indifference could it have been honest in me
to have given my hand to an odious hand and to have consented to such a
more than reluctant such an immiscible union if i may so call it for
life too did not i think more and deeper than most young creatures
think did i not weigh did i not reflect i might perhaps have been
less obstinate delicacy may i presume to call it thinking 
weighing reflection are not blessings i he not found them such in
the degree i have them i wish i had been able in some very nice
cases to have known what indifference was yet not to have my ignorance
imputable to me as a fault oh my dear the finer sensibilities if i
may suppose mine to be such make not happy 

what a method had my friends intended to take with me this i dare
say was a method chalked out by my brother he i suppose was to have
presented me to all my assembled friends as the daughter capable of
preferring her own will to the wills of them all it would have been a
sore trial no doubt would to heaven however i had stood it let the
issue have been what it would would to heaven i had stood it 

there may be murder my aunt says this looks as if she knew of
singleton's rash plot such an upshot as she calls it of this unhappy
affair heaven avert 

she flies a thought that i can less dwell upon a cruel thought but
she has a poor opinion of the purity she compliments me with if she
thinks that i am not by god's grace above temptation from this sex 
although i never saw a man whose person i could like before this
man yet his faulty character allowed me but little merit from the
indifference i pretended to on his account but now i see him in nearer
lights i like him less than ever unpolite cruel insolent unwise 
a trifler with his own happiness the destroyer of mine his last
treatment my fate too visibly in his power master of his own wishes 
 shame to say it   if he knew what to wish for indeed i never liked
him so little as now upon my word i think i could hate him if i do
not already hate him sooner than any man i ever thought tolerably
of a good reason why because i have been more disappointed in my
expectations of him although they never were so high as to have made
him my choice in preference to the single life had that been
permitted me still if the giving him up for ever will make my path to
reconciliation easy and if they will signify as much to me they shall
see that i never will be his for i have the vanity to think my soul his
soul's superior 

you will say i rave forbidden to write to my aunt and taught to
despair of reconciliation you my dear must be troubled with my
passionate resentments what a wretch was i to give him a meeting since
by that i put it out of my power to meet my assembled friends all
would now if i had met them been over and who can tell when my
present distresses will rid of both men i had been now perhaps at my
aunt hervey's or at my uncle antony's wishing for my cousin morden's
arrival who might have accommodated all 

i intended indeed to have stood it and if i had how know i by whose
name i might now have been called for how should i have resisted a
condescending a kneeling father had he been able to have kept his
temper with me 

yet my aunt say he would have relented if i had not perhaps he would
have been moved by my humility before he could have shown such undue
condescension such temper as he would have received me with might have
been improved upon in my favour and that he had designed ultimately to
relent how it clears my friends at least to themselves and condemns
me o why were my aunt's hints i remember them now so very dark yet
i intended to have returned after the interview and then perhaps
she would have explained herself o this artful this designing
lovelace yet i must repeat that most ought i to blame myself for
meeting him 

but far far be banished from me fruitless recrimination far banished 
because fruitless let me wrap myself about in the mantle of my own
integrity and take comfort in my unfaulty intention since it is now
too late to look back let me collect all my fortitude and endeavour to
stand those shafts of angry providence which it will not permit me to
shun that whatever the trials may be which i am destined to undergo i
may not behave unworthily in them and may come out amended by them 

join with me in this prayer my beloved friend for your own honour's
sake as well as for love's sake join with me in it lest a deviation
on my side should with the censorious cast a shade upon a friendship
which has no levity in it and the basis of which is improvement as
well in the greater as lesser duties 

cl harlowe 




letter liv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe saturday afternoon april 22 


o my best my only friend now indeed is my heart broken it has
received a blow it never will recover think not of corresponding with
a wretch who now seems absolutely devoted how can it be otherwise if
a parent's curses have the weight i always attributed to them and have
heard so many instances in confirmation of that weight yes my dear
miss howe superadded to all my afflictions i have the consequences
of a father's curse to struggle with how shall i support this
reflection my past and my present situation so much authorizing my
apprehensions 

i have at last a letter from my unrelenting sister would to heaven i
had not provoked it by my second letter to my aunt hervey it lay ready
for me it seems the thunder slept till i awakened it i enclose the
letter itself transcribe it i cannot there is no bearing the thoughts
of it for  shocking reflection   the curse extends to the life beyond
this 

i am in the depth of vapourish despondency i can only repeat shun 
fly correspond not with a wretch so devoted as

cl harlowe 




letter lv

to miss clarissa harlowe to be left at mr osgood's near soho-square
friday april 21 


it was expected you would send again to me or to my aunt hervey the
enclosed has lain ready for you therefore by direction you will have
no answer from any body write to whom you will and as often as you
will and what you will 

it was designed to bring you back by proper authority or to send you
whither the disgraces you have brought upon us all should be in the
likeliest way after a while to be forgotten but i believe that design
is over so you may range securely nobody will think it worth while to
give themselves any trouble about you yet my mother has obtained leave
to send you your clothes of all sorts but your clothes only this is
a favour you'll see by the within letter not designed you and now not
granted for your sake but because my poor mother cannot bear in her
sight any thing you used to wear read the enclosed and tremble 

arabella harlowe 


to the most ungrateful and undutiful of daughters harlowe-place april
15 

sister that was 

for i know not what name you are permitted or choose to go by 

you have filled us all with distraction my father in the first
agitations of his mind on discovering your wicked your shameful
elopement imprecated on his knees a fearful curse upon you tremble
at the recital of it no less than that you may meet your punishment
both here and hereafter by means of the very wretch in whom you have
chosen to place your wicked confidence 

your clothes will not be sent you you seen by leaving them behind you 
to have been secure of them whenever you demanded them but perhaps you
could think of nothing but meeting your fellow nothing but how to get
off your forward self for every thing seems to have been forgotten
but what was to contribute to your wicked flight yet you judged right 
perhaps that you would have been detected had you endeavoured to get
away with your clothes cunning creature not to make one step that we
would guess at you by cunning to effect your own ruin and the disgrace
of all the family 

but does the wretch put you upon writing for your things for fear you
should be too expensive to him that's it i suppose 

was there ever a giddier creature yet this is the celebrated the
blazing clarissa clarissa what harlowe no doubt and harlowe it will
be to the disgrace of us all 

your drawings and your pieces are all taken down as is also your
whole-length picture in the vandyke taste from your late parlour they
are taken down and thrown into your closet which will be nailed up 
as if it were not a part of the house there to perish together for who
can bear to see them yet how did they use to be shown to every body 
the former for the magnifying of your dainty finger-works the latter 
for the imputed dignity dignity now in the dust of your boasted
figure and this by those fond parents from whom you have run away with
so much yet with so little contrivance 

my brother vows revenge upon your libertine for the family's sake he
vows it not for yours for he will treat you he declares like a
common creature if ever he sees you and doubts not that this will be
your fate 

my uncle harlowe renounces you for ever 

so does my uncle antony 

so does my aunt hervey 

so do i base unworthy creature the disgrace of a good family and
the property of an infamous rake as questionless you will soon find
yourself if you are not already 

your books since they have not taught you what belongs to your family 
to your sex and to your education will not be sent to you your money
neither nor yet the jewels so undeservedly made yours for it is wished
you may be seen a beggar along london-streets 

if all this is heavy lay your hand to your heart and ask yourself why
you have deserved it 

every man whom your pride taught you to reject with scorn mr solmes
excepted who however has reason to rejoice that he missed you 
triumphs in your shameful elopement and now knows how to account for
his being refused 

your worthy norton is ashamed of you and mingles her tears with your
mother's both reproaching themselves for their shares in you and in so
fruitless an education 

every body in short is ashamed of you but none more than

arabella harlowe 




letter lvi

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe tuesday april 25 


be comforted be not dejected do not despond my dearest and
best-beloved friend god almighty is just and gracious and gives not
his assent to rash and inhuman curses can you think that heaven will
seal to the black passions of its depraved creatures if it did malice 
envy and revenge would triumph and the best of the human race blasted
by the malignity of the worst would be miserable in both worlds 

this outrageousness shows only what manner of spirit they are of and
how much their sordid views exceed their parental love tis all owing
to rage and disappointment disappointment in designs proper to be
frustrated 

if you consider this malediction as it ought to be considered a person
of your piety must and will rather pity and pray for your rash father 
than terrify yourself on the occasion none bug god can curse parents
or others whoever they be can only pray to him to curse and such
prayers can have no weight with a just and all-perfect being the
motives to which are unreasonable and the end proposed by them cruel 

has not god commanded us to bless and curse not pray for your father 
then i repeat that he incur not the malediction he has announced on
you since he has broken as you see a command truly divine while you 
by obeying that other precept which enjoins us to pray for them that
persecute and curse us will turn the curse into a blessing 

my mother blames them for this wicked letter of your sister and she
pities you and of her own accord wished me to write to comfort you 
for this once for she says it is pity your heart which was so noble 
 and when the sense of your fault and the weight of a parent's curse
are so strong upon you should be quite broken 

lord bless me how your aunt writes can there be two rights and two
wrongs in palpable cases but my dear she must be wrong so they all
have been justify themselves now as they will they can only justify
themselves to themselves from selfish principles resolving to acquit 
not fairly to try themselves did your unkind aunt in all the tedious
progress of your contentions with them give you the least hope of their
relenting her dark hints now i recollect as well as you but why was
any thing good or hopeful to be darkly hinted how easy was it for her 
who pretended always to love you for her who can give such flowing
license to her pen for your hurt to have given you one word one line
 in confidence of their pretended change of measures 

but do not mind their after-pretences my dear all of them serve but
for tacit confessions of their vile usage of you i will keep your
aunt's secret never fear i would not on any consideration that my
mother should see her letter 

you will now see that you have nothing left but to overcome all
scrupulousness and marry as son as you have an opportunity determine
to do so my dear 

i will give you a motive for it regarding myself for this i have
resolved and this i have vowed  o friend the best beloved of my
heart be not angry with me for it   that so long as your happiness is
in suspence i will never think of marrying  in justice to the man i
shall have i have vowed this for my dear must i not be miserable 
if you are so and what an unworthy wife must i be to any man who cannot
have interest enough in my heart to make his obligingness a balance for
an affliction he has not caused 

i would show lovelace your sister's abominable letter were it to me i
enclose it it shall not have a place in this house this will enter him
of course into the subject which you now ought to have most in view 
let him see what you suffer for him he cannot prove base to such an
excellence i should never enjoy my head or my senses should this
man prove a villain to you with a merit so exalted you may have
punishment more than enough for your involuntary fault in that husband 

i would not have you be too sure that their project to seize you is
over the words intimating that it is over in the letter of that
abominable arabella seem calculated to give you security she only
says she believes that design is over and i do not yet find from miss
lloyd that it is disavowed so it will be best when you are in london 
to be private and for fear of the worst to let every direction to be
a third place for i would not for the world have you fall into the
hands of such flaming and malevolent spirits by surprize 

i will myself be content to direct you at some third place and i shall
then be able to aver to my mother or to any other if occasion be that
i know not where you are 

besides this measure will make you less apprehensive of the
consequences of their violence should they resolve to attempt to carry
you of in spite of lovelace 

i would have you direct to mr hickman even your answer to this i have
a reason for it besides my mother notwithstanding this particular
indulgence is very positive they have prevailed upon her i know to
give her word to this purpose spiteful poor wretches how i hate in
particular your foolish uncle antony 

i would not have your thought dwell on the contents of your sister's
shocking letter but pursue other subjects the subjects before you 
and let me know your progress with lovelace and what he says to this
diabolical curse so far you may enter into this hateful subject i
expect that this will aptly introduce the grant topic between you 
without needing a mediator 

come my dear when things are at worst they will mend good often comes
when evil is expected but if you despond there can be no hopes of
cure don't let them break your heart for that is plain to me is now
what some people have in view for you to do 

how poor to withhold from you your books your jewels and your money 
as money is all you can at present want since they will vouchsafe
to send your clothes i send fifty guineas by the bearer enclosed in
single papers in my norris's miscellanies i charge you as you love me 
return them not 

i have more at your service so if you like not your lodgings or his
behaviour when you get to town leave both them and him out of hand 

i would advise you to write to mr morden without delay if he intends
for england it may hasten him and you will do very well till he can
come but surely lovelace will be infatuated if he secure not his
happiness by your consent before that of mr morden's is made needful
on his arrival 

once more my dear let me beg of you to be comforted manage with
your usual prudence the stake before you and all will still be happy 
suppose yourself to be me and me to be you  you may for your distress
is mine   and then you will add full day to these but glimmering lights
which are held out to you by

your ever affectionate and faithful anna howe 

i hurry this away by robert i will inquire into the truth of your
aunt's pretences about the change of measures which she says they
intended in case you had not gone away 




letter lvii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe wednesday morning april 26 


your letter my beloved miss howe gives me great comfort how sweetly
do i experience the truth of the wise man's observation that a faithful
friend is the medicine of life 

your messenger finds me just setting out for london the chaise at the
door already i have taken leave of the good widow who has obliged
me with the company of her eldest daughter at mr lovelace's request 
while he rides by us the young gentlewoman is to return in two or three
days with the chaise in its way to my lord m s hertfordshire seat 

i received my sister's dreadful letter on sunday when mr lovelace was
out he saw on his return my extreme anguish and dejection and he was
told how much worse i had been for i had fainted away more than once 

i think the contents of it have touched my head as well as my heart 

he would fain have seen it but i would not permit that because of the
threatenings he would have found in it against himself as it was the
effect it had upon me made him break out into execrations and menaces i
was so ill that he himself advised me to delay going to town on monday 
as i proposed to do 

he is extremely regardful and tender of me all that you supposed would
follow the violent letter from him has followed it he has offered
himself to my acceptance in so unreserved a manner that i am concerned
i have written so freely and diffidently of him pray my dearest
friend keep to yourself every thing that may appear disreputable of him
from me 

i must acquaint you that his kind behaviour and my low-spiritedness 
co-operating with your former advice and my unhappy situation made me
that very sunday evening receive unreservedly his declarations and now
indeed i am more in his power than ever 

he presses me every hour indeed as needlessly as unkindly for fresh
tokens of my esteem for him and confidence in him and as i have been
brought to some verbal concessions if he should prove unworthy i am
sure i shall have great reason to blame this violent letter for i have
no resolution at all abandoned thus of all my natural friends of whose
returning favour i have now no hopes and only you to pity me and you
restrained as i may say i have been forced to turn my desolate heart
to such protection as i could find 

all my comfort is that your advice repeatedly given me to the same
purpose in your kind letter before me warrants me i now set out the
more cheerfully to london on that account for before a heavy weight
hung upon my heart and although i thought it best and safest to go 
yet my spirits sunk i know not why at every motion i made towards a
preparation for it 

i hope no mischief will happen on the road i hope these violent
spirits will not meet 

every one is waiting for me pardon me my best my kindest friend 
that i return your norris in these more promising prospects i cannot
have occasion for your favour besides i have some hope that with my
clothes they will send me the money i wrote for although it is denied
me in the letter if they do not and if i should have occasion i can
but signify my wants to so ready a friend and i have promised to be
obliged only to you but i had rather methinks you should have it still
to say if challenged that nothing of this nature has been either
requested or done i say this with a view entirely to my future hopes
of recovering your mother's favour which next to that of my own father
and mother i am most solicitous to recover 

i must acquaint you wit one thing more notwithstanding my hurry and
that is that mr lovelace offered either to attend me to lord m s or
to send for his chaplain yesterday he pressed me to consent to this
proposal most earnestly and even seemed desirous rather to have the
ceremony pass here than at london for when there i had told him it
was time enough to consider of so weighty and important a matter now 
upon the receipt of your kind your consolatory letter methinks i
could almost wish it had been in my power to comply with his earnest
solicitations but this dreadful letter has unhinged my whole frame 
then some little punctilio surely is necessary no preparation made 
no articles drawn no license ready grief so extreme no pleasure in
prospect nor so much as in wish o my dear who could think of entering
into so solemn an engagement who so unprepared could seem to be so
ready 

if i could flatter myself that my indifference to all the joys of this
life proceeded from proper motives not rather from the disappointments
and mortifications my pride has met with how much rather i think 
should i choose to be wedded to my shroud than to any man on earth 

indeed i have at present no pleasure but in your friendship continue
that to me i beseech you if my heart rises hereafter to a capacity of
more it must be built on that foundation 

my spirits sink again on setting out excuse this depth of vapourish
dejection which forbids me even hope the cordial that keeps life
from stagnating and which never was denied me till within these
eight-and-forty hours 

but tis time to relieve you 

adieu my best beloved and kindest friend pray for your clarissa 




letter lviii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe thursday april 27 


i am sorry you sent back my norris but you must be allowed to do as you
please so must i in my turn we must neither of us perhaps expect
absolutely of the other what is the rightest thing to be done and
yet few folks so young as we are better know what the rightest is i
cannot separate myself from you although i give a double instance of my
vanity in joining myself with you in this particular assertion 

i am most heartily rejoiced that your prospects are so much mended and
that as i hoped good has been produced out of evil what must the man
have been what must have been his views had he not taken such a
turn upon a letter so vile and upon a treatment so unnatural himself
principally the occasion of it 

you know best your motives for suspending but i wish you could have
taken him at offers so earnest why should you not have permitted him
to send for lord m s chaplain if punctilio only was in the way and
want of a license and of proper preparations and such like my service
to you my dear and there is ceremony tantamount to your ceremony 


 mr lovelace in his next letter tells his friend how extremely ill
the lady was recovering from fits to fall into stronger fits and
nobody expecting her life she had not he says acquainted miss howe
how very ill she was in the next letter she tells miss howe that her
motives for suspending were not merely ceremonious ones 


do not do not my dear friend again be so very melancholy a decliner
as to prefer a shroud when the matter you wish for is in your power 
and when as you have justly said heretofore persons cannot die when
they will 

but it is a strange perverseness in human nature that we slight that
when near us which at a distance we wish for 

you have now but one point to pursue that is marriage let that be
solemnized leave the rest to providence and to use your own words in
a former letter follow as that leads you will have a handsome man 
a genteel man he would be a wise man if he were not vain of his
endowments and wild and intriguing but while the eyes of many of our
sex taken by so specious a form and so brilliant a spirit encourage
that vanity you must be contented to stay till grey hairs and prudence
enter upon the stage together you would not have every thing in the
same man 

i believe mr hickman treads no crooked paths but he hobbles most
ungracefully in a straight one yet mr hickman though he pleases not
my eye nor diverts my ear will not as i believe disgust the one nor
shock the other your man as i have lately said will always keep up
attention you will always be alive with him though perhaps more from
fears than hopes while mr hickman will neither say any thing to keep
one awake nor yet by shocking adventures make one's slumbers uneasy 

i believe i now know which of the two men so prudent a person as you
would at first have chosen nor doubt i that you can guess which i
would have made choice of if i might but proud as we are the proudest
of us all can only refuse and many of us accept the but half-worthy 
for fear a still worse should offer 

if men had chosen their mistresses for spirits like their own although
mr lovelace at the long run may have been too many for me i don't
doubt but i should have given heart-ach for heart-ach for one half-year
at least while you with my dull-swift would have glided on as
serenely as calmly as unaccountably as the succeeding seasons 
and varying no otherwise than they to bring on new beauties and
conveniencies to all about you 


 


i was going on in this style but my mother broke in upon me with a
prohibitory aspect she gave me leave for one letter only  she
had just parted with your odious uncle and they have been in close
conference again 

she has vexed me i must lay this by till i hear from you again not
knowing whither to send it 

direct me to a third place as i desired in my former 

i told my mother on her challenging me that i was writing indeed and
to you but it was only to amuse myself for i protested that i knew not
where to send to you 

i hope that your next may inform me of your nuptials although the next
to that were to acquaint me that he was the most ungratefullest monster
on earth as he must be if not the kindest husband in it 

my mother has vexed me but so on revising i wrote before but she
has unhinged me as you call it pretended to catechise hickman i
assure you for contributing to our supposed correspondence catechised
him severely too upon my word i believe i have a sneaking kindness
for the sneaking fellow for i cannot endure that any body should treat
him like a fool but myself 

i believe between you and me the good lady forgot herself i heard her
loud she possibly imagined that my father was come to life again yet
the meekness of the man might have soon convinced her i should have
thought for my father it seems would talk as loud as she i suppose 
 though within a few yards of each other as if both were out of their
way and were hallooing at half a mile's distance to get in again 

i know you'll blame me for this sauciness but i told you i was vexed 
and if i had not a spirit my parentage on both sides might be doubted 

you must not chide me too severely however because i have learned of
you not to defend myself in an error and i own i am wrong and that's
enough you won't be so generous in this case as you are in every other 
if you don't think it is 

adieu my dear i must i will love you and love you for ever so
subscribes your

anna howe 




letter lix

from miss howe  enclosed in the above   thursday april 27 


i have been making inquiry as i told you i would whether your
relations had really before you left them resolved upon that change of
measures which your aunt mentions in her letter and by laying together
several pieces of intelligence some drawn from my mother through your
uncle antony's communications some from miss lloyd by your sister's 
and some by a third way that i shall not tell you of i have reason to
think the following a true state of the case 

that there was no intention of a change of measures till within two or
three days of your going away on the contrary your brother and sister 
though they had no hope of prevailing with you in solmes's favour were
resolved never to give over their persecutions till they had pushed you
upon taking some step which by help of their good offices should be
deemed inexcusable by the half-witted souls they had to play upon 

but that at last your mother tired with and perhaps ashamed of
the passive part she had acted thought fit to declare to miss bell 
that she was determined to try to put an end to the family feuds and to
get your uncle harlowe to second her endeavours 

this alarmed your brother and sister and then a change of measures
was resolved upon solmes's offers were however too advantageous to
be given up and your father's condescension was now to be their sole
dependence and as they give it out the trying of what that would do
with you their last effort 

and indeed my dear this must have succeeded i verily think with such
a daughter as they had to deal with could that father who never i
dare say kneeled in his life but to his god have so far condescended
as your aunt writes he would 

but then my dear what would this have done perhaps you would
have given lovelace this meeting in hopes to pacify him and prevent
mischief supposing that they had given you time and not hurried you
directly into the state but if you had not met him you see that he was
resolved to visit them and well attended too and what must have been
the consequence 

so that upon the whole we know not but matters may be best as they
are however disagreeable that best is 

i hope your considerate and thoughtful mind will make a good use of
this hint who would not with patience sustain even a great evil if she
could persuade herself that it was kindly dispensed in order to prevent
a still greater especially if she could sit down as you can and
acquit her own heart 

permit me one further observation do we not see from the above state
of the matter what might have been done before by the worthy person
of your family had she exerted the mother in behalf of a child so
meritorious yet so much oppressed 

adieu my dear i will be ever yours anna howe 


 


 clarissa in her answer to the first of the two last letters chides
her friend for giving so little weight to her advice in relation to her
 behaviour to her mother it may be proper to insert here the
 following extracts from that answer though a little before the time  

you assume my dear says she your usual and ever-agreeable style in
what you write of the two gentlemen and how unaptly you think they
have chosen mr hickman in addressing you mr lovelace me but i am
inclinable to believe that with a view to happiness however two mild
tempers might agree two high ones would make sad work of it both at
one time violent and unyielding you two might indeed have raqueted
the ball betwixt you as you say but mr hickman by his gentle
manners seems formed for you if you go not too far with him if you
do it would be a tameness in him to bear it which would make a man
more contemptible than mr hickman can ever deserve to be made nor is
it a disgrace for even a brave man who knows what a woman is to vow to
him afterwards to be very obsequious beforehand 


 see letter xxxv and letter xxxvi of this volume 
 see letter xxxvi of this volume 


do you think it is to the credit of mr lovelace's character that he
can be offensive and violent does he not as all such spirits must 
subject himself to the necessity of making submissions for his excesses
far more mortifying to a proud heart than those condescensions which the
high-spirited are so apt to impute as a weakness of mind in such a man
as mr hickman 

let me tell you my dear that mr hickman is such a one as would rather
bear an affront from a lady than offer one to her he had rather i
dare say that she should have occasion to ask his pardon than he her's 
but my dear you have outlived your first passion and had the second
man been an angel he would not have been more than indifferent to you 

my motives for suspending proceeds she were not merely ceremonious
ones i was really very ill i could not hold up my head the contents
of my sister's letters had pierced my heart indeed my dear i was very
ill and was i moreover to be as ready to accept his offer as if i
were afraid he never would repeat it 

i see with great regret that your mamma is still immovably bent against
our correspondence what shall i do about it it goes against me to
continue it or to wish you to favour me with returns yet i have so
managed my matters that i have no friend but you to advise with it is
enough to make one indeed wish to be married to this man though a man
of errors as he has worthy relations of my own sex and i should have
some friends i hope and having some i might have more for as
money is said to increase money so does the countenance of persons of
character increase friends while the destitute must be destitute it
goes against my heart to beg of you to discontinue corresponding with
me and yet it is against my conscience to carry it on against parental
prohibition but i dare not use all the arguments against it that i
could use and why for fear i should convince you and you should
reject me as the rest of my friends have done i leave therefore the
determination of this point upon you i am not i find to be trusted
with it but be mine all the fault and all the punishment if it be
punishable and certainly it must when it can be the cause of the
letter i have before me and which i must no farther animadvert upon 
because you forbid me to do so 


 to the second letter among other things she says  

so my dear you seem to think that there was a fate in my error the
cordial the considerate friendship is seen in the observation you make
on this occasion yet since things have happened as they have would
to heaven i could hear that all the world acquitted my father or at
least my mother whose character before these family feuds broke out 
was the subject of everyone's admiration don't let any body say from
you so that it may come to her ear that she might from a timely
exertion of her fine talents have saved her unhappy child you will
observe my dear that in her own good time when she saw there was not
likely to be an end to my brother's persecutions she resolved to
exert herself but the pragmatical daughter by the fatal meeting 
precipitated all and frustrated her indulgent designs o my love i am
now convinced by dear experience that while children are so happy
as to have parents or guardians whom they may consult they should not
presume no not with the best and purest intentions to follow their
own conceits in material cases 

a ray of hope of future reconciliation darts in upon my mind from the
intention you tell me my mother had to exert herself in my favour had i
not gone away and my hope is the stronger as this communication points
out to me that my uncle harlowe's interest is likely in my mother's
opinion to be of weight if it could be engaged it will behove me 
perhaps to apply to that dear uncle if a proper occasion offer 




letter lx

mr lovelace to john belford esq monday april 24 


fate is weaving a whimsical web for thy friend and i see not but i
shall be inevitably manacled 

here have i been at work dig dig dig like a cunning miner at one
time and spreading my snares like an artful fowler at another and
exulting in my contrivances to get this inimitable creature absolutely
into my power every thing made for me her brother and uncles were but
my pioneers her father stormed as i directed him to storm mrs howe
was acted by the springs i set at work her daughter was moving for me 
yet imagined herself plumb against me and the dear creature herself
had already run her stubborn neck into my gin and knew not that she was
caught for i had not drawn my springs close about her and just as
all this was completed wouldst thou believe that i should be my own
enemy and her friend that i should be so totally diverted from all my
favourite purposes as to propose to marry her before i went to town in
order to put it out of my own power to resume them 

when thou knowest this wilt thou not think that my black angel plays me
booty and has taken it into his head to urge me on to the indissoluble
tie that he might be more sure of me from the complex transgressions
to which he will certainly stimulate me when wedded than perhaps
he thought he could be from the simple sins in which i have so long
allowed myself that they seem to have the plea of habit 

thou wilt be still the more surprised when i tell thee that there
seems to be a coalition going forward between the black angels and the
white ones for here has her's induced her in one hour and by one
retrograde accident to acknowledge what the charming creature never
before acknowledged a preferable favour for me she even avows an
intention to be mine mine without reformation-conditions she
permits me to talk of love to her of the irrevocable ceremony yet 
another extraordinary postpones that ceremony chooses to set out for
london and even to go to the widow's in town 

well but how comes all this about methinks thou askest thou 
lovelace dealest in wonders yet aimest not at the marvellous how did
all this come about 

i will tell thee i was in danger of losing my charmer for ever she was
soaring upward to her native skies she was got above earth by means
too of the earth-born and something extraordinary was to be done to
keep her with us sublunaries and what so effectually as the soothing
voice of love and the attracting offer of matrimony from a man
not hated can fix the attention of the maiden heart aching with
uncertainty and before impatient of the questionable question 

this in short was the case while she was refusing all manner of
obligation to me keeping me at haughty distance in hopes that her
cousin morden's arrival would soon fix her in a full and absolute
independence of me disgusted likewise at her adorer for holding
himself the reins of his own passions instead of giving them up to her
controul she writes a letter urging an answer to a letter before sent 
for her apparel her jewels and some gold which she had left behind
her all which was to save her pride from obligation and to promote the
independence her heart was set upon and what followed but a shocking
answer made still more shocking by the communication of a father's
curse upon a daughter deserving only blessings a curse upon the
curser's heart and a double one upon the transmitter's the spiteful
the envious arabella 

absent when it came on my return i found her recovering from fits 
again to fall into stronger fits and nobody expecting her life half a
dozen messengers dispatched to find me out nor wonder at her being so
affected she whose filial piety gave her dreadful faith in a father's
curses and the curse of this gloomy tyrant extending to use her own
words when she could speak to both worlds o that it had turned in
the moment of its utterance to a mortal quinsy and sticking in his
gullet had choked the old execrator as a warning to all such unnatural
fathers 

what a miscreant had i been not to have endeavoured to bring her back 
by all the endearments by all the vows by all the offers that i could
make her 

i did bring her back more than a father to her for i have given her a
life her unnatural father had well-nigh taken away shall i not cherish
the fruits of my own benefaction i was earnest in my vows to marry 
and my ardour to urge the present time was a real ardour but extreme
dejection with a mingled delicacy that in her dying moments i doubt
not she will preserve have caused her to refuse me the time though not
the solemnity for she has told me that now she must be wholly in my
protection  being destitute of every other   more indebted still thy
friend as thou seest to her cruel relations than to herself for her
favour 

she has written to miss howe an account of their barbarity but has not
acquainted her how very ill she was 

low very low she remains yet dreading her stupid brother's
enterprise she wants to be in london where but for this accident and
 wouldst thou have believed it for my persuasions seeing her so very
ill she would have been this night and we shall actually set out on
wednesday morning if she be not worse 

and now for a few words with thee on the heavy preachment of saturday
last 

thou art apprehensive that the lady is now truly in danger and it is a
miracle thou tellest me if she withstand such an attempter knowing
what we know of the sex thou sayest thou shouldst dread wert thou
me to make further trial lest thou shouldst succeed  and in another
place tellest me that thou pleadest not for the state for any favour
thou hast for it 

what an advocate art thou for matrimony 

thou wert ever an unhappy fellow at argument does the trite stuff with
which the rest of thy letter abounds in favour of wedlock strike with
the force that this which i have transcribed does against it 

thou takest great pains to convince me and that from the distresses
the lady is reduced to chiefly by her friend's persecutions and
implacableness i hope thou wilt own and not from me as yet that the
proposed trial will not be a fair trial but let me ask thee is not
calamity the test of virtue and wouldst thou not have me value this
charming creature upon proof of her merits do i not intend to reward
her by marriage if she stand that proof 

but why repeat i what i have said before turn back thou egregious
arguer turn back to my long letter of the 13th and thou wilt there
find every syllable of what thou hast written either answered or
invalidated 


 see letter xviii of this volume 


but i am not angry with thee jack i love opposition as gold is tried
by fire and virtue by temptation so is sterling wit by opposition 
have i not before thou settest out as an advocate for my fair-one 
often brought thee in as making objections to my proceedings for no
other reason than to exalt myself by proving thee a man of straw as
homer raises up many of his champions and gives them terrible names 
only to have them knocked on the head by his heroes 

however take to thee this one piece of advice evermore be sure of
being in the right when thou presumest to sit down to correct thy
master 

and another if thou wilt never offer to invalidate the force which
a virtuous education ought to have in the sex by endeavouring to find
excuses for their frailty from the frailty of ours for are we not
devils to each other they tempt us we tempt them because we men
cannot resist temptation is that a reason that women ought not 
when the whole of their education is caution and warning against our
attempts do not their grandmothers give them one easy rule men are to
ask women are to deny 

well but to return to my principal subject let me observe that be my
future resolutions what they will as to this lady the contents of the
violent letter she has received have set me at least a month forward
with her i can now as i hinted talk of love and marriage without
controul or restriction her injunctions no more my terror 

in this sweetly familiar way shall we set out together for london 
mrs sorlings's eldest daughter at my motion is to attend her in the
chaise while i ride by way of escort for she is extremely apprehensive
of the singleton plot and has engaged me to be all patience if any
thing should happen on the road but nothing i am sure will happen 
for by a letter received just now from joseph i understand that
james harlowe has already laid aside his stupid project and this by the
earnest desire of all those of his friends to whom he had communicated
it who were afraid of the consequences that might attend it but it is
not over with me however although i am not determined at present as to
the uses i may make of it 

my beloved tells me she shall have her clothes sent her she hopes also
her jewels and some gold which she left behind her but joseph says 
clothes only will be sent i will not however tell her that on the
contrary i say there is no doubt but they will send all she wrote
for the greater her disappointment from them the greater must be her
dependence on me 

but after all i hope i shall be enabled to be honest to a merit so
transcendent the devil take thee though for thy opinion given so
mal-a-propos that she may be overcome 

if thou designest to be honest methinkst thou sayest why should not
singleton's plot be over with thee as it is with her brother 

because if i must answer thee where people are so modestly doubtful of
what they are able to do it is good to leave a loop-hole and let me
add that when a man's heart is set upon a point and any thing occurs
to beat him off he will find it very difficult when the suspending
reason ceases to forbear resuming it 




letter lxi

mr lovelace to john belford esq tuesday april 25 


all hands at work in preparation for london what makes my heart beat
so strong why rises it to my throat in such half-choking flutters when
i think of what this removal may do for me i am hitherto resolved to
be honest and that increases my wonder at these involuntary commotions 
tis a plotting villain of a heart it ever was and ever will be i
doubt such a joy when any roguery is going forward i so little its
master a head likewise so well turned to answer the triangular
varlet's impulses no matter i will have one struggle with thee old
friend and if i cannot overcome thee now i never will again attempt to
conquer thee 

the dear creature continues extremely low and dejected tender blossom 
how unfit to contend with the rude and ruffling winds of passion and
haughty and insolent control never till now from under the wing it is
not enough to say of indulging but of admiring parents the mother's
bosom only fit to receive this charming flower 

this was the reflection that with mingled compassion and augmented
love arose to my mind when i beheld the charmer reposing her lovely
face upon the bosom of the widow sorlings from a recovered fit as i
entered soon after she had received her execrable sister's letter how
lovely in her tears and as i entered her uplifted face significantly
bespeaking my protection as i thought and can i be a villain to such
an angel i hope not but why belford why once more puttest thou
me in mind that she may be overcome and why is her own reliance on my
honour so late and so reluctantly shown 

but after all so low so dejected continues she to be that i am
terribly afraid i shall have a vapourish wife if i do marry i should
then be doubly undone not that i shall be much at home with her 
perhaps after the first fortnight or so but when a man has been
ranging like the painful bee from flower to flower perhaps for a
month together and the thoughts of home and a wife begin to have their
charms with him to be received by a niobe who like a wounded vine 
weeps her vitals away while she but involuntary curls about him how
shall i be able to bear that 

may heaven restore my charmer to health and spirits i hourly pray that
a man may see whether she can love any body but her father and mother 
in their power i am confident it will be at any time to make her
husband joyless and that as i hate them so heartily is a shocking
thing to reflect upon something more than woman an angel in some
things but a baby in others so father-sick so family-fond what a
poor chance stands a husband with such a wife unless forsooth they
vouchsafe to be reconciled to her and continue reconciled 

it is infinitely better for her and for me that we should not marry 
what a delightful manner of life  o that i could persuade her to
it   would the life of honour be with such a woman the fears the
inquietudes the uneasy days the restless nights all arising from
doubts of having disobliged me every absence dreaded to be an
absence for ever and then how amply rewarded and rewarding by the
rapture-causing return such a passion as this keeps love in a continual
fervour makes it all alive the happy pair instead of sitting dozing
and nodding at each other in opposite chimney-corners in a winter
evening and over a wintry love always new to each other and having
always something to say 

thou knowest in my verses to my stella my mind on this occasion 
i will lay those verses in her way as if undesignedly when we are
together at the widow's that is to say if we do not soon go to church
by consent she will thence see what my notions are of wedlock if she
receives them with any sort of temper that will be a foundation and
let me alone to build upon it 

many a girl has been carried who never would have been attempted had
she showed a proper resentment when her ears or her eyes were first
invaded i have tried a young creature by a bad book a light quotation 
or an indecent picture and if she has borne that or only blushed and
not been angry and more especially if she has leered and smiled that
girl have i and old satan put down for our own o how i could warn
these little rogues if i would perhaps envy more than virtue will
put me upon setting up beacons for them when i grow old and joyless 


tuesday afternoon 

if you are in london when i get thither you will see me soon my
charmer is a little better than she was her eyes show it and her
harmonious voice hardly audible last time i saw her now begins to
cheer my heart once more but yet she has no love no sensibility 
there is no addressing her with those meaning yet innocent freedoms
 innocent at first setting out they may be called which soften others
of her sex the more strange this as she now acknowledges preferable
favour for me and is highly susceptible of grief grief mollifies 
and enervates the grieved mind looks round it silently implores
consolation and loves the soother grief is ever an inmate with joy 
though they won't show themselves at the same window at one time yet
they have the whole house in common between them 




letter lxii

mr lovelace to john belford esq wedn april 26 


at last my lucky star has directed us into the desired port and we are
safely landed well says rowe 

 the wise and active conquer difficulties 
 by daring to attempt them sloth and folly
 shiver and shrink at sight of toil and hazard 
 and make th' impossibility they fear 

but in the midst of my exultation something i know not what to call
it checks my joys and glooms over my brighter prospects if it be not
conscience it is wondrously like what i thought so many many years
ago 

surely lovelace methinks thou sayest thy good motions are not gone
off already surely thou wilt not now at last be a villain to this lady 

i can't tell what to say to it why would not the dear creature accept
of me when i so sincerely offered myself to her acceptance things
already appear with a very different face now i have got her here 
already have our mother and her daughters been about me charming
lady what a complexion what eyes what majesty in her person o
mr lovelace you are a happy man you owe us such a lady  then they
remind me of my revenge and of my hatred to her whole family 

sally was so struck with her at first sight that she broke out to me
in these lines of dryden 

 fairer to be seen
 than the fair lily on the flow'ry green 
 more fresh than may herself in blossoms new 

i sent to thy lodgings within half an hour after our arrival to receive
thy congratulation upon it but thou wert at edgeware it seems 

my beloved who is charmingly amended is retired to her constant
employment writing i must content myself with the same amusement till
she shall be pleased to admit me to her presence for already have i
given to every one her cue 

and among the rest who dost thou think is to be her maid
servant deb butler 

ah lovelace 

and ah belford it can't be otherwise but what dost think deb's name
is to be why dorcas dorcas wykes and won't it be admirable if 
either through fear fright or good liking we can get my beloved to
accept of dorcas wykes for a bed-fellow 

in so many ways will it be now in my power to have the dear creature 
that i shall not know which of them to choose 

but here comes the widow with dorcas wykes in her hand and i am to
introduce them both to my fair-one 


 


so the honest girl is accepted of good parentage but through a
neglected education plaguy illiterate she can neither write nor
read writing a kinswoman of mrs sinclair could not therefore well be
refused the widow in person recommending her and the wench only taken
till her hannah can come what an advantage has an imposing or forward
nature over a courteous one so here may something arise to lead into
correspondencies and so forth to be sure a person need not be so wary 
so cautious of what she writes or what she leaves upon her table or
toilette when her attendant cannot read 

it would be a miracle as thou sayest if this lady can save
herself and having gone so far how can i recede then my revenge upon
the harlowes to have run away with a daughter of theirs to make her
a lovelace to make her one of a family so superior to her own what a
triumph as i have heretofore observed to them but to run away
with her and to bring her to my lure in the other light what a
mortification of their pride what a gratification of my own 

then these women are continually at me these women who before my
whole soul and faculties were absorbed in the love of this single
charmer used always to oblige me with the flower and first fruits of
their garden indeed indeed my goddess should not have chosen this
london widow's but i dare say if i had she would not people who will
be dealing in contradiction ought to pay for it and to be punished by
the consequences of our own choice what a moral lies there what a
deal of good may i not be the occasion of from a little evil 

dorcas is a neat creature both in person and dress her continuance not
vulgar and i am in hopes as i hinted above that her lady will accept
of her for her bedfellow in a strange house for a week or so but i
saw she had a dislike to her at her very first appearance yet i thought
the girl behaved very modestly over-did it a little perhaps her
ladyship shrunk back and looked shy upon her the doctrine of
sympathies and antipathies is a surprising doctrine but dorcas will be
excessively obliging and win her lady's favour soon i doubt not i
am secure in one of the wench's qualities however she is not to be
corrupted a great point that since a lady and her maid when heartily
of one party will be too hard for half a score devils 

the dear creature was no less shy when the widow first accosted her at
her alighting yet i thought that honest doleman's letter had prepared
her for her masculine appearance 

and now i mention that letter why dost thou not wish me joy jack 

joy of what 

why joy of my nuptials know then that said is done with me when i
have a mind to have it so and that we are actually man and wife only
that consummation has not passed bound down to the contrary of that 
by a solemn vow till a reconciliation with her family take place the
women here are told so they know it before my beloved knows it and
that thou wilt say is odd 

but how shall i do to make my fair-one keep her temper on the
intimation why is she not here at mrs sinclair's but if she will
hear reason i doubt not to convince her that she ought to acquiesce 

she will insist i suppose upon my leaving her and that i shall not
take up my lodgings under the same roof but circumstances are changed
since i first made her that promise i have taken all the vacant
apartments and must carry this point also 

i hope in a while to get her with me to the public entertainments she
knows nothing of the town and has seen less of its diversions than
ever woman of her taste her fortune her endowments did see she has 
indeed a natural politeness which transcends all acquirement the most
capable of any one i ever knew of judging what an hundred things are by
seeing one of a like nature indeed she took so much pleasure in her
own chosen amusements till persecuted out of them that she had neither
leisure nor inclination for the town diversions 

these diversions will amuse and the deuce is in it if a little
susceptibility will not put forth now she receives my address 
especially if i can manage it so as to be allowed to live under one roof
with her what though the sensibility be at first faint and reluctant 
like the appearance of an early spring-flower in frosty winter which
seems afraid of being nipt by an easterly blast that will be enough for
me 

i hinted to thee in a former that i had provided books for the lady's
in-door amusement sally and polly are readers my beloved's light
closet was their library and several pieces of devotion have been put
in bought on purpose at second-hand 


 see letter xxxix of this volume 


i was always for forming a judgment of the reading part of the sex by
their books the observations i have made on this occasion have been of
great use to me as well in england as out of it the sagacious lady may
possibly be as curious in this point as her lovelace 

so much for the present thou seest that i have a great deal of business
before me yet i will write again soon 


 mr lovelace sends another letter with this in which he takes notice
of young miss sorlings's setting out with them and leaving them at
 barnet but as its contents are nearly the same with those in the
 lady's next letter it is omitted  


contents of volume iv


letter i clarissa to miss howe 
likes her lodgings but not greatly the widow chides miss howe for her
rash though friendly vow catalogue of good books she finds in her
closet utterly dissatisfied with him for giving out to the women below
that they were privately married has a strong debate with him on this
subject he offers matrimony to her but in such a manner that she could
not close with his offer her caution as to doors windows and seals of
letters 

letter ii miss howe to clarissa 
her expedient to correspond with each other every day is glad she had
thoughts of marrying him had he repeated his offer wonders he did not 

letter iii clarissa to miss howe 
breakfasts with him and the widow and her two nieces observations upon
their behaviour and looks he makes a merit of leaving her and hopes 
on his return that she will name his happy day she is willing to make
the best constructions in his favour 

in his next letter extracts from which are only given he triumphs on
the points he has carried stimulated by the women he resumes his
resolution to try her to the utmost 

letter iv clarissa to miss howe 
lovelace returns the next day she thinks herself meanly treated and is
angry he again urges marriage but before she can return his answer
makes another proposal yet she suspects not that he means a studied
delay he is in treaty for mrs fretchville's house description of it 
an inviting opportunity offers for him to propose matrimony to her she
wonders he let it slip he is very urgent for her company at a collation
he is to give to four of his select friends and miss partington he
gives an account who miss partington is 

in mr lovelace's next letter he invites belford mowbray belton and
tourville to his collation his humourous instructions for their
behaviour before the lady has two views in getting her into their
company 

letter v lovelace to belford 
has been at church with clarissa the sabbath a charming institution 
the text startles him nathan the prophet he calls a good ingenious
fellow she likes the women better than she did at first she
reluctantly consents to honour his collation with her presence longs
to have their opinions of his fair prize describes her to great
advantage 

letter vi clarissa to miss howe 
she praises his good behaviour at st paul's is prevailed on to dine
with mrs sinclair and her nieces is better pleased with them than she
thought she should be blames herself for her readiness to censure 
where reputation is concerned her charitable allowances on this head 
this day an agreeable day interprets ever thing she can fairly
interpret in mr lovelace's favour she could prefer him to all the men
she ever knew if he would always be what he had been that day is
determined as much as possible by true merit and by deeds dates
again and is offended at miss partington's being introduced to her and
at his making her yield to be present at his intended collation 

letter vii from the same 
disgusted wit her evening characterizes his four companions likes not
miss partington's behaviour 

letter viii from the same 
an attempt to induce her to admit miss partington to a share in her bed
for that night she refuses her reasons is highly dissatisfied 

letter ix from the same 
has received an angry letter from mrs howe forbidding her to correspond
with her daughter she advises compliance though against herself and 
to induce her to it makes the best of her present prospects 

letter x miss howe in answer 
flames out upon this step of her mother insists upon continuing the
correspondence her menaces if clarissa write not raves against
lovelace but blames her for not obliging miss partington and why 
advises her to think of settlements likes lovelace's proposal of mrs 
fretchville's house 

letter xi clarissa in reply 
terrified at her menaces she promises to continue writing beseeches
her to learn to subdue her passions has just received her clothes 

letter xii mr hickman to clarissa 
miss howe he tells her is uneasy for the vexation she has given her 
if she will write on as before miss howe will not think of doing what
she is so apprehensive of he offers her his most faithful services 

letter xiii xiv lovelace to belford 
tells him how much the lady dislikes the confraternity belford as well
as the rest has a warm debate with her in her behalf looks upon her
refusing a share in her bed to miss partington as suspecting and defying
him threatens her savagely glories in her grief on receiving miss
howe's prohibitory letter which appears to be instigated by himself 

letter xv belford to lovelace 
his and his compeer's high admiration of clarissa they all join to
entreat him to do her justice 

letter xvi xvii lovelace in answer 
he endeavours to palliate his purposes by familiar instances of cruelty
to birds etc farther characteristic reasonings in support of his wicked
designs the passive condition to which he wants to bring the lady 

letter xviii belford in reply 
still warmly argues in behalf of the lady is obliged to attend a dying
uncle and entreats him to write from time to time an account of all his
proceedings 

letter xix clarissa to miss howe 
lovelace she says complains of the reserves he gives occasion for his
pride a dirty low pride which has eaten up his prudence he is sunk in
her opinion an afflicting letter sent her from her cousin morden 

encloses the letter in which her cousin swayed by the representations
of her brother pleads in behalf of solmes and the family-views and
sets before her in strong and just lights the character of a libertine 

her heavy reflections upon the contents her generous prayer 

letter xx clarissa to miss howe 
he presses her to go abroad with him yet mentions not the ceremony that
should give propriety to his urgency cannot bear the life she lives 
wishes her uncle harlowe to be sounded by mr hickman as to a
reconciliation mennell introduced to her will not take another step
with lovelace till she know the success of the proposed application to
her uncle 

substance of two letters from lovelace to belford in which he tells him
who mennell is and gives an account of many new contrivances and
precautions women's pockets ballast-bags mrs sinclair's wardrobe 
good order observed in her house the lady's caution he says warrants
his contrivances 

letter xxi lovelace to belford 
will write a play the title of it the quarrelsome lovers 
perseverance his glory patience his hand-maid attempts to get a letter
the lady had dropt as she sat her high indignation upon it farther
plots paul wheatly who and for what employed sally martin's
reproaches has overplotted himself human nature a well-known rogue 

letter xxii clarissa to miss howe 
acquaints her with their present quarrel finds it imprudent to stay
with him re-urges the application to her uncle cautions her sex with
regard to the danger of being misled by the eye 

letter xxiii miss howe in answer 
approves of her leaving lovelace new stories of his wickedness will
have her uncle sounded comforts her how much her case differs from
that of any other female fugitive she will be an example as well as a
warning a picture of clarissa's happiness before she knew lovelace 
brief sketches of her exalted character adversity her shining time 

letter xxiv clarissa in reply 
has a contest with lovelace about going to church he obliges her again
to accept of his company to st paul's 

letter xxv miss howe to mrs norton 
desiring her to try to dispose mrs harlowe to forward a reconciliation 

letter xxvi mrs norton in answer 

letter xxvii miss howe in reply 

letter xxviii mrs harlowe's pathetic letter to mrs norton 

letter xxix miss howe to clarissa 
fruitless issue of mr hickman's application to her uncle advises her
how to proceed with and what to say to lovelace endeavours to account
for his teasing ways who knows she says but her dear friend was
permitted to swerve in order to bring about his reformation informs
her of her uncle antony's intended address to her mother 

letter xxx clarissa to miss howe 
hard fate to be thrown upon an ungenerous and cruel man reasons why she
cannot proceed with mr lovelace as she advises affecting apostrophe to
lovelace 

letter xxxi from the same 
interesting conversation with lovelace he frightens her he mentions
settlements her modest encouragements of him he evades true
generosity what she requires his proposals of settlements in writing 
examines herself on her whole conduct to lovelace maidenly niceness not
her motive for the distance she has kept him at what is invites her
correction if she deceive herself 

letter xxxii from the same 
with mr lovelace's written proposals her observations on the cold
conclusion of them he knows not what every wise man knows of the
prudence and delicacy required in a wife 

letter xxxiii from the same 
mr lovelace presses for the day yet makes a proposal which must
necessarily occasion a delay her unreserved and pathetic answer to it 
he is affected by it she rejoices that he is penetrable he presses
for her instant resolution but at the same time insinuates delay 
seeing her displeased he urges for the morrow but before she can
answer gives her the alternative of other days yet wanting to reward
himself as if he had obliged her she repulses him on a liberty he would
have taken he is enraged her melancholy reflections on her future
prospects with such a man the moral she deduces from her story  a
note defending her conduct from the censure which passed upon her as
over nice  

extracts from four of his letters in which he glories in his cruelty 
hardheartedness he owns to be an essential of the libertine character 
enjoys the confusion of a fine woman his apostrophe to virtue ashamed
of being visibly affected enraged against her for repulsing him will
steel his own heart that he may cut through a rock of ice to her's the
women afresh instigate him to attempt her virtue 

letter xxxiv miss howe to clarissa 
is enraged at his delays will think of some scheme to get her out of
his hands has no notion that he can or dare to mean her dishonour 
women do not naturally hate such men as lovelace 

letter xxxv belford to lovelace 
warmly espouses the lady's cause nothing but vanity and nonsense in the
wild pursuits of libertines for his own sake for his family's sake 
and for the sake of their common humanity he beseeches him to do this
lady justice 

letter xxxvi lord m to mr belford 
a proverbial letter in the lady's favour 

letter xxxvii lovelace to belford 
he ludicrously turns belford's arguments against him resistance
inflames him why the gallant is preferred to the husband gives a piece
of advice to married women substance of his letter to lord m desiring
him to give the lady to him in person his view in this letter 
ridicules lord m for his proverbs ludicrous advice to belford in
relation to his dying uncle what physicians should do when a patient is
given over 

letter xxxviii belford to lovelace 
sets forth the folly the inconvenience the impolicy of keeping and the
preference of marriage upon the foot of their own principles as
libertines 

letter xxxix lovelace to belford 
affects to mistake the intention of belford's letter and thanks him for
approving his present scheme the seduction progress is more delightful
to him he says than the crowning act 

letter xl from the same 
all extremely happy at present contrives a conversation for the lady to
overhear platonic love how it generally ends will get her to a play 
likes not tragedies has too much feeling why men of his cast prefer
comedy to tragedy the nymphs and mrs sinclair and all their
acquaintances of the same mind other artifices of his could he have
been admitted in her hours of dishabille and heedlessness he had been
long ago master of his wishes his view in getting her to a play a
play and a collation afterwards greatly befriend a lover's designs and
why she consents to go with him to see the tragedy of venice preserved 

letter xli clarissa to miss howe 
gives the particulars of the overheard conversation thinks her
prospects a little mended is willing to compound for tolerable
appearances and to hope when reason for hope offers 

letter xlii miss howe to clarissa 
her scheme of mrs townsend is not for encouraging dealers in
prohibited goods and why her humourous treatment of hickman on
consulting him upon lovelace's proposals of settlements 

letter xliii from the same 
her account of antony harlowe's address to her mother and of what passed
on her mother's communicating it to her copy of mrs howe's answer to
his letter 

letter xliv xlv lovelace to belford 
comes at several letters of miss howe he is now more assured of
clarissa than ever and why sparkling eyes what they indicate she
keeps him at distance repeated instigations from the women account of
the letters he has come at all rage and revenge upon the contents of
them menaces hickman wishes miss howe had come up to town as she
threatened 

letter xlvi clarissa to miss howe is terrified by him disclaims
prudery begs of miss howe to perfect her scheme that she may leave
him she thinks her temper changed for the worse trembles to look back
upon his encroachments is afraid on the close self-examination which
her calamities have caused her to make that even in the best actions of
her past life she has not been quite free from secret pride etc tears
almost in two the answer she had written to his proposals intends to go
out next day and not to return her farther intentions 

letter xlvii lovelace to belford 
meets the lady at breakfast flings the tea-cup and saucer over his
head the occasion alarms and terrifies her by his free address 
romping the use of it by a lover will try if she will not yield to
nightly surprises a lion-hearted lady where her honour is concerned 
must have recourse to his master-strokes fable of the sun and north
wind mrs fretchville's house an embarrass he gives that pretended
lady the small-pox other contrivances in his head to bring clarissa
back if she should get away miss howe's scheme of mrs townsend is he
says a sword hanging over his head he must change his measures to
render it abortive he is of the true lady-make what that is another
conversation between them her apostrophe to her father he is
temporarily moved dorcas gives him notice of a paper she has come at 
and is transcribing in order to detain the lady he presses for the
day miss howe he fancies in love with him and why he sees clarissa
does not hate him 

letter xlviii from the same 
copy of the transcribed paper it proves to be her torn answer to his
proposals meekness the glory of a woman ludicrous image of a
termagant wife he had better never to have seen this paper has very
strong remorses paints them in lively colours sets forth the lady's
transcendent virtue and greatness of mind surprised into these
arguments in her favour by his conscience puts it to flight 

letter xlix from the same 
mennell scruples to aid him farther in his designs vapourish people
the physical tribe's milch-cows advice to the faculty has done with
the project about mrs fretchville's house the lady suspects him a
seasonable letter for him from his cousin charlotte sends up the letter
to the lady she writes to miss howe upon perusing it to suspend for
the present her application to mrs townsend 

letter l from the same 
an interview all placid and agreeable now is he in a train all he now
waits for is a letter from lord m inquires after their marriage by a
stranger of good appearance the lady alarmed at them 

letter li lovelace to belford 
curses his uncle for another proverbial letter he has sent him permits
the lady to see it nine women in ten that fall fall he says through
their own fault 

letter lii lord m s characteristic letter 

letter liii lovelace to belford 
the lady now comes to him at the first word triumphs in her sweetness
of temper and on her patience with him puts his writings into
counsellor williams's hands to prepare settlements shall now be doubly
armed boasts of his contrivances in petto brings patterns to her 
proposes jewels admires her for her prudence with regard to what he
puts her upon doing for her norton what his wife must do and be she
declines a public wedding her dutiful reasons she is willing to
dispense with lord m s presence he writes to lord m accordingly 

extract from a letter from clarissa 
after giving miss howe an account of the present favourable appearances 
she desires her to keep herself all such of the particulars which she has
communicated to her as may discredit mr lovelace 

letter liv lovelace to belford 
his projected plot to revenge himself upon miss howe 

letter lv from the same 
fresh contrivances crowd in upon him he shall be very sick on the
morrow and why women below impertinently reproachful he will be no
man's successor will not take up with harlots history of the french
marquis 




the history

of

clarissa harlowe



letter i

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
wednesday afternoon april 26 


at length my dearest miss howe i am in london and in my new lodgings 
they are neatly furnished and the situation for the town is pleasant 

but i think you must not ask me how i like the old gentlewoman yet she
seems courteous and obliging her kinswomen just appeared to welcome me
at my alighting they seemed to be genteel young women but more of
their aunt and them as i shall see more 

miss sorlings has an uncle at barnet whom she found so very ill that
her uneasiness on that account having large expectations from him 
made me comply with her desire to stay with him yet i wished as her
uncle did not expect her that she would see me settled in london and
mr lovelace was still more earnest that she would offering to send her
back again in a day or two and urging that her uncle's malady threatened
not a sudden change but leaving the matter to her choice after she
knew what would have been mine she made me not the expected compliment 
mr lovelace however made her a handsome present at parting 

his genteel spirit on all occasions makes me often wish him more
consistent 

as soon as he arrived i took possession of my apartment i shall make
good use of the light closet in it if i stay here any time 

one of his attendants returns in the morning to the lawn and i made
writing to you by him an excuse for my retiring 

and now give me leave to chide you my dearest friend for your rash 
and i hope revocable resolution not to make mr hickman the happiest man
in the world while my happiness is in suspense suppose i were to be
unhappy what my dear would this resolution of yours avail me 
marriage is the highest state of friendship if happy it lessens our
cares by dividing them at the same time that it doubles our pleasures
by a mutual participation why my dear if you love me will you not
rather give another friend to one who has not two she is sure of had
you married on your mother's last birth-day as she would have had you 
i should not i dare say have wanted a refuge that would have saved me
many mortifications and much disgrace 


 


here i was broke in upon by mr lovelace introducing the widow leading
in a kinswoman of her's to attend me if i approved of her till my
hannah should come or till i had provided myself with some other
servant the widow gave her many good qualities but said that she had
one great defect which was that she could not write nor read writing 
that part of her education having been neglected when she was young but
for discretion fidelity obligingness she was not to be out-done by any
body so commented her likewise for her skill at the needle 

as for her defect i can easily forgive that she is very likely and
genteel too genteel indeed i think for a servant but what i like
least of all in her she has a strange sly eye i never saw such an eye 
half-confident i think but indeed mrs sinclair herself for that is
the widow's name has an odd winking eye and her respectfulness seems
too much studied methinks for the london ease and freedom but people
can't help their looks you know and after all she is extremely civil
and obliging and as for the young woman dorcas is her name she will
not be long with me 

i accepted her how could i do otherwise if i had had a mind to make
objections which in my present situation i had not her aunt present 
and the young woman also present and mr lovelace officious in his
introducing them to oblige me but upon their leaving me i told him 
 who seemed inclinable to begin a conversation with me that i desired
that this apartment might be considered as my retirement that when i saw
him it might be in the dining-room which is up a few stairs for this
back-house being once two the rooms do not all of them very
conveniently communicate with each other and that i might be as little
broken in upon as possible when i am here he withdrew very
respectfully to the door but there stopt and asked for my company then
in the dining-room if he were about setting out for other lodgings i
would go with him now i told him but if he did not just then go i
would first finish my letter to miss howe 

i see he has no mind to leave me if he can help it my brother's scheme
may give him a pretence to try to engage me to dispense with his promise 
but if i now do i must acquit him of it entirely 

my approbation of his tender behaviour in the midst of my grief has
given him a right as he seems to think of addressing me with all the
freedom of an approved lover i see by this man that when once a woman
embarks with this sex there is no receding one concession is but the
prelude to another with them he has been ever since sunday last
continually complaining of the distance i keep him at and thinks himself
entitled now to call in question my value for him strengthening his
doubts by my former declared readiness to give him up to a reconciliation
with my friends and yet has himself fallen off from that obsequious
tenderness if i may couple the words which drew from me the concessions
he builds upon 

while we were talking at the door my new servant came up with an
invitation to us both to tea i said he might accept of it if he
pleased but i must pursue my writing and not choosing either tea or
supper i desired him to make my excuses below as to both and inform
them of my choice to be retired as much as possible yet to promise for
me my attendance on the widow and her nieces at breakfast in the morning 

he objected particularly in the eye of strangers as to avoiding supper 

you know said i and you can tell them that i seldom eat suppers my
spirits are low you must never urge me against a declared choice 
pray mr lovelace inform them of all my particularities if they are
obliging they will allow for them i come not hither to make new
acquaintance 

i have turned over the books i found in my closet and am not a little
pleased with them and think the better of the people of the house for
their sakes 

stanhope's gospels sharp's tillotson's and south's sermons nelson's
feasts and fasts a sacramental piece of the bishop of man and another
of dr gauden bishop of exeter and inett's devotions are among the
devout books and among those of a lighter turn the following not ill-
chosen ones a telemachus in french another in english steel's 
rowe's and shakespeare's plays that genteel comedy of mr cibber the
careless husband and others of the same author dryden's miscellanies 
the tatlers spectators and guardians pope's and swift's and
addison's works 

in the blank leaves of the nelson and bishop gauden is mrs sinclair's
name and in those of most of the others either sarah martin or mary
horton the names of the two nieces 


 


i am exceedingly out of humour with mr lovelace and have great reason
to be so as you will allow when you have read the conversation i am
going to give you an account of for he would not let me rest till i gave
him my company in the dining-room 

he began with letting me know that he had been out to inquire after the
character of the widow which was the more necessary he said as he
supposed that i would expect his frequent absence 

i did i said and that he would not think of taking up his lodging in
the same house with me but what said i is the result of your inquiry 

why indeed the widow's character was in the main what he liked well
enough but as it was miss howe's opinion as i had told him that my
brother had not given over his scheme as the widow lived by letting
lodgings and had others to let in the same part of the house which
might be taken by an enemy he knew no better way than for him to take
them all as it could not be for a long time unless i would think of
removing to others 

so far was well enough but as it was easy for me to see that he spoke
the slighter of the widow in order to have a pretence to lodge here
himself i asked him his intention in that respect and he frankly
owned that if i chose to stay here he could not as matters stood 
think of leaving me for six hours together and he had prepared the widow
to expect that we should be here but for a few days only till we could
fix ourselves in a house suitable to our condition and this that i
might be under the less embarrassment if i pleased to remove 

fix our-selves in a house and we and our mr lovelace pray in what
light 

he interrupted me why my dearest life if you will hear me with
patience yet i am half afraid that i have been too forward as i have
not consulted you upon it but as my friends in town according to what
mr doleman has written in the letter you have seen conclude us to be
married 

surely sir you have not presumed 

hear me out my dearest creature you have received with favour my
addresses you have made me hope for the honour of your consenting hand 
yet by declining my most fervent tender of myself to you at mrs 
sorlings's have given me apprehensions of delay i would not for the
world be thought so ungenerous a wretch now you have honoured me with
your confidence as to wish to precipitate you yet your brother's
schemes are not given up singleton i am afraid is actually in town 
his vessel lies at rotherhithe your brother is absent from harlowe-
place indeed not with singleton yet as i can hear if you are known
to be mine or if you are but thought to be so there will probably be an
end of your brother's contrivances the widow's character may be as
worthy as it is said to be but the worthier she is the more danger 
if your brother's agent should find us out since she may be persuaded 
that she ought in conscience to take a parent's part against a child who
stands in opposition to them but if she believes us married her good
character will stand us instead and give her a reason why two apartments
are requisite for us at the hour of retirement 

i perfectly raved at him i would have flung from him in resentment but
he would not let me and what could i do whither go the evening
advanced 

i am astonished at you said i if you are a man of honour what need of
all this strange obliquity you delight in crooked ways let me know 
since i must stay in your company for he held my hand let me know all
you have said to the people below indeed indeed mr lovelace you are
a very unaccountable man 

my dearest creature need i to have mentioned any thing of this and
could i not have taken up my lodgings in this house unknown to you if i
had not intended to make you the judge of all my proceedings but this
is what i have told the widow before her kinswomen and before your new
servant that indeed we were privately married at hertford but that you
had preliminarily bound me under a solemn vow which i am most
religiously resolved to keep to be contented with separate apartments 
and even not to lodge under the same roof till a certain reconciliation
shall take place which is of high consequence to both  and further
that i might convince you of the purity of my intentions and that my
whole view in this was to prevent mischief i have acquainted them that
i have solemnly promised to behave to you before every body as if we
were only betrothed and not married not even offering to take any of
those innocent freedoms which are not refused in the most punctilious
loves 

and then he solemnly vowed to me the strictest observance of the same
respectful behaviour to me 

i said that i was not by any means satisfied with the tale he had told 
nor with the necessity he wanted to lay me under of appearing what i was
not that every step he took was a wry one a needless wry one and since
he thought it necessary to tell the people below any thing about me i
insisted that he should unsay all he had said and tell them the truth 

what he had told them he said was with so many circumstances that he
could sooner die than contradict it and still he insisted upon the
propriety of appearing to be married for the reasons he had given
before and dearest creature said he why this high displeasure with
me upon so well-intended an expedient you know that i cannot wish to
shun your brother or his singleton but upon your account the first
step i would take if left to myself would be to find them out i have
always acted in this manner when any body has presumed to give out
threatenings against it 

tis true i would have consulted you first and had your leave but
since you dislike what i have said let me implore you dearest madam 
to give the only proper sanction to it by naming an early day would to
heaven that were to be to-morrow for god's sake let it be to-morrow 
but if not  was it his business my dear before i spoke yet he seemed
to be afraid of me to say if not   let me beseech you madam if my
behaviour shall not be to your dislike that you will not to-morrow at
breakfast-time discredit what i have told them the moment i give you
cause to think that i take any advantage of your concession that moment
revoke it and expose me as i shall deserve and once more let me
remind you that i have no view either to serve or save myself by this
expedient it is only to prevent a probable mischief for your own
mind's sake and for the sake of those who deserve not the least
consideration from me 

what could i say what could i do i verily think that had he urged me
again in a proper manner i should have consented little satisfied as i
am with him to give him a meeting to-morrow morning at a more solemn
place than in the parlour below 

but this i resolve that he shall not have my consent to stay a night
under this roof he has now given me a stronger reason for this
determination than i had before 


 


alas my dear how vain a thing to say what we will or what we will not
do when we have put ourselves into the power of this sex he went down
to the people below on my desiring to be left to myself and staid till
their supper was just ready and then desiring a moment's audience as
he called it he besought my leave to stay that one night promising to
set out either for lord m s or for edgeware to his friend belford's 
in the morning after breakfast but if i were against it he said he
would not stay supper and would attend me about eight next day yet he
added that my denial would have a very particular appearance to the
people below from what he had told them and the more as he had
actually agreed for all the vacant apartments indeed only for a month 
for the reasons he before hinted at but i need not stay here two days 
if upon conversing with the widow and her nieces in the morning i
should have any dislike to them 

i thought notwithstanding my resolution above-mentioned that it would
seem too punctilious to deny him under the circumstances he had
mentioned having besides no reason to think he would obey me for he
looked as if he were determined to debate the matter with me and now 
as i see no likelihood of a reconciliation with my friends and as i have
actually received his addresses i thought i would not quarrel with him 
if i could help it especially as he asked to stay but for one night and
could have done so without my knowing it and you being of opinion that
the proud wretch distrusting his own merits with me or at least my
regard for him will probably bring me to some concessions in his favour
 for all these reasons i thought proper to yield this point yet i was
so vexed with him on the other that it was impossible for me to comply
with that grace which a concession should be made with or not made at
all 

this was what i said what you will do you must do i think you are
very ready to promise very ready to depart from your promise you say 
however that you will set out to-morrow for the country you know how
ill i have been i am not well enough now to debate with you upon your
encroaching ways i am utterly dissatisfied with the tale you have told
below nor will i promise to appear to the people of the house to-morrow
what i am not 

he withdrew in the most respectful manner beseeching me only to favour
him with such a meeting in the morning as might not make the widow and
her nieces think he had given me reason to be offended with him 

i retired to my own apartment and dorcas came to me soon after to take
my commands i told her that i required very little attendance and
always dressed and undressed myself 

she seemed concerned as if she thought i had repulsed her and said it
should be her whole study to oblige me 

i told her that i was not difficult to be pleased and should let her
know from time to time what assistance i should expect from her but for
that night i had no occasion for her further attendance 

she is not only genteel but is well bred and well spoken she must have
had what is generally thought to be the polite part of education but it
is strange that fathers and mothers should make so light as they
generally do of that preferable part in girls which would improve
their minds and give a grace to all the rest 

as soon as she was gone i inspected the doors the windows the
wainscot the dark closet as well as the light one and finding very good
fastenings to the door and to all the windows i again had recourse to
my pen 


 


mrs sinclair is just now gone from me dorcas she told me had
acquainted her that i had dismissed her for the night she came to ask
me how i liked my apartment and to wish me good rest she expressed her
concern that they could not have my company at supper mr lovelace 
she said had informed them of my love of retirement she assured me 
that i should not be broken in upon she highly extolled him and gave
me a share in the praise as to person but was sorry she said that she
was likely to lose us so soon as mr lovelace talked of 

i answered her with suitable civility and she withdrew with great tokens
of respect with greater i think than should be from distance of
years as she was the wife of a gentleman and as the appearance of every
thing about her as well house as dress carries the marks of such good
circumstances as require not abasement 

if my dear you will write against prohibition be pleased to direct 
to miss laetitia beaumont to be left till called for at mr wilson's 
in pall mall 

mr lovelace proposed this direction to me not knowing of your desire
that your letters should pass by a third hand as his motive for it was 
that my brother might not trace out where we are i am glad as well from
this instance as from others that he seems to think he has done mischief
enough already 

do you know how my poor hannah does 

mr lovelace is so full of his contrivances and expedients that i think
it may not be amiss to desire you to look carefully to the seals of my
letters as i shall to those of yours if i find him base in this
particular i shall think him capable of any evil and will fly him as my
worst enemy 



letter ii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
 with her two last letters no lviii lix of vol iii enclosed  
thursday night april 27 


i have your's just brought me mr hickman has helped me to a lucky
expedient which with the assistance of the post will enable me to
correspond with you every day an honest higler  simon collins his
name   by whom i shall send this and the two enclosed now i have your
direction whither goes to town constantly on mondays wednesdays and
fridays and can bring back to me from mr wilson's what you shall have
caused to be left for me 

i congratulate you on your arrival in town so much amended in spirits 
i must be brief i hope you'll have no cause to repent returning my
norris it is forthcoming on demand 

i am sorry your hannah can't be with you she is very ill still but not
dangerously 

i long for your account of the women you are with if they are not right
people you will find them out in one breakfasting 

i know not what to write upon his reporting to them that you are actually
married his reasons for it are plausible but he delights in odd
expedients and inventions 

whether you like the people or not do not by your noble sincerity and
plain dealing make yourself enemies you are in the real world now you
know 

i am glad you had thoughts of taking him at his offer if he had re-urged
it i wonder he did not but if he do not soon and in such a way as
you can accept of it don't think of staying with him 

depend upon it my dear he will not leave you either night or day if
he can help it now he has got footing 

i should have abhorred him for his report of your marriage had he not
made it with such circumstances as leave it still in your power to keep
him at distance if once he offer at the least familiarity but this is
needless to say to you he can have i think no other design but what
he professes because he must needs think that his report of being
married to you must increase your vigilance 

you may depend upon my looking narrowly into the sealings of your
letters if as you say he be base in that point he will be so in
every thing but to a person of your merit of your fortune of your
virtue he cannot be base the man is no fool it is his interest as
well with regard to his expectations from his own friends as from you 
to be honest would to heaven however you were really married this
is now the predominant wish of

your
anna howe 



letter iii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
thursday morning eight o'clock 


i am more and more displeased with mr lovelace on reflection for his
boldness in hoping to make me though but passively as i may say 
testify to his great untruth and i shall like him still less for it if
his view in it does not come out to be the hope of accelerating my
resolution in his favour by the difficulty it will lay me under as to my
behaviour to him he has sent me his compliments by dorcas with a
request that i will permit him to attend me in the dining-room meet him
in good humour or not but i have answered that as i shall see him at
breakfast-time i desired to be excused 


ten o'clock 

i tried to adjust my countenance before i went down to an easier air
than i had a heart and was received with the highest tokens of respect
by the widow and her two nieces agreeable young women enough in their
persons but they seemed to put on an air of reserve while mr lovelace
was easy and free to all as if he were of long acquaintance with them 
gracefully enough i cannot but say an advantage which travelled
gentlemen have over other people 

the widow in the conversation we had after breakfast gave us an account
of the military merit of the colonel her husband and upon this
occasion put her handkerchief to her eyes twice or thrice i hope for
the sake of her sincerity she wetted it because she would be thought to
have done so but i saw not that she did she wished that i might never
know the loss of a husband so dear to me as her beloved colonel was to
her and she again put the handkerchief to her eyes 

it must no doubt be a most affecting thing to be separated from a good
husband and to be left in difficult circumstances besides and that not
by his fault and exposed to the insults of the base and ungrateful as
she represented her case to be at his death this moved me a good deal
in her favour 

you know my dear that i have an open and free heart and naturally have
as open and free a countenance at least my complimenters have told me
so at once where i like i mingle minds without reserve encouraging
reciprocal freedoms and am forward to dissipate diffidences but with
these two nieces of the widow i never can be intimate i don't know why 

only that circumstances and what passed in conversation encouraged not
the notion or i should have been apt to think that the young ladies and
mr lovelace were of longer acquaintance than of yesterday for he by
stealth as it were cast glances sometimes at them when they returned 
and on my ocular notice their eyes fell as i may say under my eye as
if they could not stand its examination 

the widow directed all her talk to me as to mrs lovelace and i with a
very ill grace bore it and once she expressed more forwardly than i
thanked her for her wonder that any vow any consideration however
weighty could have force enough with so charming a couple as she called
him and me to make us keep separate beds 

their eyes upon this hint had the advantage of mine yet was i not
conscious of guilt how know i then upon recollection that my censures
upon theirs are not too rash there are no doubt many truly modest
persons putting myself out of the question who by blushes at an
injurious charge have been suspected by those who cannot distinguish
between the confusion which guilt will be attended with and the noble
consciousness that overspreads the face of a fine spirit to be thought
but capable of an imputed evil 

the great roman as we read who took his surname from one part in three
 the fourth not then discovered of the world he had triumphed over 
being charged with a great crime to his soldiery chose rather to suffer
exile the punishment due to it had he been found guilty than to have
it said that scipio was questioned in public on so scandalous a charge 
and think you my dear that scipio did not blush with indignation when
the charge was first communicated to him 

mr lovelace when the widow expressed her forward wonder looked sly and
leering as if to observe how i took it and said they might take notice
that his regard for my will and pleasure calling me his dear creature 
had greater force upon him than the oath by which he had bound himself 

rebuking both him and the widow i said it was strange to me to hear an
oath or vow so lightly treated as to have it thought but of second
consideration whatever were the first 

the observation was just miss martin said for that nothing could excuse
the breaking of a solemn vow be the occasion of making it what it would 

i asked her after the nearest church for i have been too long a stranger
to the sacred worship they named st james's st anne's and another
in bloomsbury and the two nieces said they oftenest went to st james's
church because of the good company as well as for the excellent
preaching 

mr lovelace said the royal chapel was the place he oftenest went to 
when he was in town poor man little did i expect to hear he went to
any place of devotion i asked if the presence of the visible king of 
comparatively but a small territory did not take off too generally 
the requisite attention to the service of the invisible king and maker
of a thousand worlds 

he believed this might be so with such as came for curiosity when the
royal family were present but otherwise he had seen as many contrite
faces at the royal chapel as any where else and why not since the
people about court have as deep scores to wipe off as any people
whatsoever 

he spoke this with so much levity that i could not help saying that
nobody questioned but he knew how to choose his company 

your servant my dear bowing were his words and turning to them you
will observe upon numberless occasions ladies as we are further
acquainted that my beloved never spares me upon these topics but i
admire her as much in her reproofs as i am fond of her approbation 

miss horton said there was a time for every thing she could not but
say that she thought innocent mirth was mighty becoming in young people 

very true joined in miss martin and shakespeare says well that youth
is the spring of life the bloom of gaudy years  with a theatrical air 
she spoke it   and for her part she could not but admire in my spouse
that charming vivacity which so well suited his time of life 

mr lovelace bowed the man is fond of praise more fond of it i
doubt than of deserving it yet this sort of praise he does deserve 
he has you know an easy free manner and no bad voice and this praise
so expanded his gay heart that he sung the following lines from
congreve as he told us they were 

 youth does a thousand pleasures bring 
 which from decrepid age will fly 
 sweets that wanton in the bosom of the spring 
 in winter's cold embraces die 

and this for a compliment as he said to the two nieces nor was it
thrown away upon them they encored it and his compliance fixed them
in my memory 

we had some talk about meals and the widow very civilly offered to
conform to any rules i would set her i told her how easily i was
pleased and how much i chose to dine by myself and that from a plate
sent me from any single dish but i will not trouble you my dear with
such particulars 

they thought me very singular and with reason but as i liked them not
so very well as to forego my own choice in compliment to them i was the
less concerned for what they thought and still the less as mr lovelace
had put me very much out of humour with him 

they however cautioned me against melancholy i said i should be a
very unhappy creature if i could not bear my own company 

mr lovelace said that he must let the ladies into my story and then
they would know how to allow for my ways but my dear as you love me 
said the confident wretch give as little way to melancholy as possible 
nothing but the sweetness of your temper and your high notions of a duty
that never can be deserved where you place it can make you so uneasy as
you are be not angry my dear love for saying so  seeing me frown i
suppose   and snatched my hand and kissed it i left him with them and
retired to my closet and my pen 

just as i have written thus far i am interrupted by a message from him 
that he is setting out on a journey and desires to take my commands so
here i will leave off to give him a meeting in the dining-room 



i was not displeased to see him in his riding-dress 

he seemed desirous to know how i liked the gentlewomen below i told
him that although i did not think them very exceptionable yet as i
wanted not in my present situation new acquaintance i should not be
fond of cultivating theirs 

he urged me still farther on this head 

i could not say i told him that i greatly liked either of the young
gentlewomen any more than their aunt and that were my situation ever
so happy they had much too gay a turn for me 

he did not wonder he said to hear me say so he knew not any of the
sex who had been accustomed to show themselves at the town diversions
and amusements that would appear tolerable to me silences and blushes 
madam are now no graces with our fine ladies in town hardened by
frequent public appearances they would be as much ashamed to be found
guilty of these weaknesses as men 

do you defend these two gentlewomen sir by reflections upon half the
sex but you must second me mr lovelace and yet i am not fond of
being thought particular in my desire of breakfasting and supping when
i do sup by myself 

if i would have it so to be sure it should be so the people of the
house were not of consequence enough to be apologized to in any point
where my pleasure was concerned and if i should dislike them still more
on further knowledge of them he hoped i would think of some other
lodgings 

he expressed a good deal of regret at leaving me declaring that it was
absolutely in obedience to my commands but that he could not have
consented to go while my brother's schemes were on foot if i had not
done him the credit of my countenance in the report he had made that we
were married which he said had bound all the family to his interest 
so that he could leave me with the greater security and satisfaction 

he hoped he said that on his return i would name his happy day and the
rather as i might be convinced by my brother's projects that no
reconciliation was to be expected 

i told him that perhaps i might write one letter to my uncle harlowe 
he once loved me i should be easier when i had made one direct
application i might possibly propose such terms in relation to my
grandfather's estate as might procure me their attention and i hoped he
would be long enough absent to give me time to write to him and receive
an answer from him 

that he must beg my pardon he could not promise he would inform
himself of singleton's and my brother's motions and if on his return he
found no reason for apprehension he would go directly for berks and
endeavour to bring up with him his cousin charlotte who he hoped would
induce me to give him an earlier day than at present i seemed to think
of i seemed to think of my dear very acquiescent as i should
imagine 

i told him that i should take that young lady's company for a great
favour 

i was the more pleased with this motion as it came from himself and
with no ill grace 

he earnestly pressed me to accept of a bank note but i declined it and
then he offered me his servant william for my attendant in his absence 
who he said might be dispatched to him if any thing extraordinary fell
out i consented to that 

he took his leave of me in the most respectful manner only kissing my
hand he left the bank note unobserved by me upon the table you may
be sure i shall give it him back at his return 

i am in a much better humour with him than i was 

where doubts of any person are removed a mind not ungenerous is willing 
by way of amends for having conceived those doubts to construe every
thing that happens capable of a good instruction in that person's
favour particularly i cannot but be pleased to observe that although
he speaks of the ladies of his family with the freedom of relationship 
yet it is always of tenderness and from a man's kindness to his
relations of the sex a woman has some reason to expect his good
behaviour to herself when married if she be willing to deserve it from
him 

and thus my dear am i brought to sit down satisfied with this man 
where i find room to infer that he is not by nature a savage but how
could a creature who treating herself unpolitely gave a man an
opportunity to run away with her expect to be treated by that man with a
very high degree of politeness 

but why now when fairer prospects seem to open why these melancholy
reflections will my beloved friend ask of her clarissa 

why can you ask why my dearest miss howe of a creature who in the
world's eye had enrolled her name among the giddy and inconsiderate who
labours under a parent's curse and the cruel uncertainties which must
arise from reflecting that equally against duty and principle she has
thrown herself into the power of a man and that man an immoral one 
must not the sense she has of her inconsideration darken her most hopeful
prospects must it not even rise strongest upon a thoughtful mind when
her hopes are the fairest even her pleasures were the man to prove
better than she expects coming to her with an abatement like that which
persons who are in possession of ill-gotten wealth must then most
poignantly experience if they have reflecting and unseared minds when 
all their wishes answered if answered they sit down in hopes to enjoy
what they have unjustly obtained and find their own reflections their
greatest torment 

may you my dear friend be always happy in your reflections prays

your ever affectionate
cl harlowe 


 


 mr lovelace in his next letter triumphs on his having carried his two
 great points of making the lady yield to pass for his wife to the
 people of the house and to his taking up his lodging in it though
 but for one night he is now he says in a fair way and doubts not
 but that he shall soon prevail if not by persuasion by surprise 
 yet he pretends to have some little remorse and censures himself as
 to acting the part of the grand tempter but having succeeded thus
 far he cannot he says forbear trying according to the resolution
 he had before made whether he cannot go farther 

he gives the particulars of their debates on the above-mentioned
 subjects to the same effect as in the lady's last letters 

it will by this time be seen that his whole merit with regard to the
 lady lies in doing justice to her excellencies both of mind and
 person though to his own condemnation thus he begins his succeeding
 letter  

and now belford will i give thee an account of our first breakfast-
conversation 

all sweetly serene and easy was the lovely brow and charming aspect of my
goddess on her descending among us commanding reverence from every eye 
a courtesy from every knee and silence awful silence from every
quivering lip while she armed with conscious worthiness and
superiority looked and behaved as an empress would look and behave among
her vassals yet with a freedom from pride and haughtiness as if born to
dignity and to a behaviour habitually gracious 


 he takes notice of the jealousy pride and vanity of sally martin and
 polly horton on his respectful behaviour to the lady creatures who 
 brought up too high for their fortunes and to a taste of pleasure 
 and the public diversions had fallen an easy prey to his seducing
 arts as will be seen in the conclusion of this work and who as he
 observed had not yet got over that distinction in their love which
 makes a woman prefer one man to another  

how difficult is it says he to make a woman subscribe to a preference
against herself though ever so visible especially where love is
concerned this violent this partial little devil sally has the
insolence to compare herself with my angel yet owns her to be an angel 
i charge you mr lovelace say she show none of your extravagant acts
of kindness before me to this sullen this gloomy beauty i cannot bear
it then was i reminded of her first sacrifice 

what a rout do these women make about nothing at all were it not for
what the learned bishop in his letter from italy calls the
entanglements of amour and i the delicacies of intrigue what is there 
belford in all they can do for us 

how do these creatures endeavour to stimulate me a fallen woman is a
worse devil than ever a profligate man the former is incapable of
remorse that am not i nor ever shall they prevail upon me though aided
by all the powers of darkness to treat this admirable creature with
indignity so far i mean as indignity can be separated from the trials
which will prove her to be either woman or angel 

yet with them i am a craven i might have had her before now if i
would if i would treat her as flesh and blood i should find her such 
they thought i knew if any man living did that if a man made a goddess
of a woman she would assume the goddess that if power were given to
her she would exert that power to the giver if to nobody else and
d r's wife is thrown into my dish who thou knowest kept her
ceremonious husband at haughty distance and whined in private to her
insulting footman o how i cursed the blasphemous wretches they will
make me as i tell them hate their house and remove from it and by my
soul jack i am ready at times to think that i should not have brought
her hither were it but on sally's account and yet without knowing
either sally's heart or polly's the dear creature resolves against
having any conversation with them but such as she can avoid i am not
sorry for this thou mayest think since jealousy in a woman is not to be
concealed from woman and sally has no command of herself 

what dost think here this little devil sally not being able as she
told me to support life under my displeasure was going into a fit but
when i saw her preparing for it i went out of the room and so she
thought it would not be worth her while to show away 


 in this manner he mentions what his meaning was in making the lady the
 compliment of his absence  

as to leaving her if i go but for one night i have fulfilled my
promise and if she think not i can mutter and grumble and yield again 
and make a merit of it and then unable to live out of her presence 
soon return nor are women ever angry at bottom for being disobeyed
through excess of love they like an uncontroulable passion they like
to have every favour ravished from them and to be eaten and drunk quite
up by a voracious lover don't i know the sex not so indeed as yet 
my clarissa but however with her my frequent egresses will make me
look new to her and create little busy scenes between us at the least 
i may surely without exception salute her at parting and at return 
and will not those occasional freedoms which civility will warrant by
degrees familiarize my charmer to them 

but here jack what shall i do with my uncle and aunts and all my
loving cousins for i understand that they are more in haste to have me
married than i am myself 



letter iv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
friday april 28 


mr lovelace is returned already my brother's projects were his
pretence i could not but look upon this short absence as an evasion of
his promise especially as he had taken such precautions with the people
below and as he knew that i proposed to keep close within-doors i
cannot bear to be dealt meanly with and angrily insisted that he should
directly set out for berkshire in order to engage his cousin as he had
promised 

o my dearest life said he why will you banish me from your presence i
cannot leave you for so long a time as you seem to expect i should i
have been hovering about town ever since i left you edgware was the
farthest place i went to and there i was not able to stay two hours for
fear at this crisis any thing should happen who can account for the
workings of an apprehensive mind when all that is dear and valuable to
it is at stake you may spare yourself the trouble of writing to any of
your friends till the solemnity has passed that shall entitle me to give
weight to your application when they know we are married your
brother's plots will be at an end and your father and mother and
uncles must be reconciled to you why then should you hesitate a moment
to confirm my happiness why once more would you banish me from you 
why will you not give the man who has brought you into difficulties and
who so honourably wishes to extricate you from them the happiness of
doing so 

he was silent my voice failed to second the inclination i had to say
something not wholly discouraging to a point so warmly pressed 

i'll tell you my angel resumed he what i propose to do if you approve
of it i will instantly go out to view some of the handsome new squares
or fine streets round them and make a report to you of any suitable
house i find to be let i will take such a one as you shall choose and
set up an equipage befitting our condition you shall direct the whole 
and on some early day either before or after we fix  it must be at
your own choice  be pleased to make me the happiest of men and then
will every thing be in a desirable train you shall receive in your own
house if it can be so soon furnished as i wish the compliments of all
my relations charlotte shall visit you in the interim and if it take
up time you shall choose whom you will honour with your company first 
second or third in the summer months and on your return you shall find
all that was wanting in your new habitation supplied and pleasures in a
constant round shall attend us o my angel take me to you instead of
banishing me from you and make me your's for ever 

you see my dear that here was no day pressed for i was not uneasy
about that and the sooner recovered myself as there was not but 
however i gave him no reason to upbraid me for refusing his offer of
going in search of a house 

he is accordingly gone out for this purpose but i find that he intends
to take up his lodging here tonight and if to-night no doubt on other
nights while he is in town as the doors and windows of my apartment
have good fastenings as he has not in all this time given me cause for
apprehension as he has the pretence of my brother's schemes to plead as
the people below are very courteous and obliging miss horton especially 
who seems to have taken a great liking to me and to be of a gentler
temper and manners than miss martin and as we are now in a tolerable
way i imagine it would look particular to them all and bring me into a
debate with a man who let him be set upon what he will has always a
great deal to say for himself if i were to insist upon his promise on
all these accounts i think i will take no notice of his lodging here 
if he don't let me know my dear your thoughts of every thing 

you may believe i gave him back his bank note the moment i saw him 


friday evening 

mr lovelace has seen two or three houses but none to his mind but he
has heard of one which looks promising he says and which he is to
inquire about in the morning 


saturday morning 

he has made his inquiries and actually seen the house he was told of
last night the owner of it is a young widow lady who is inconsolable
for the death of her husband fretchville her name it is furnished
quite in taste every thing being new within these six months he
believes if i like not the furniture the use of it may be agreed for 
with the house for a time certain but if i like it he will endeavour
to take the one and purchase the other directly 

the lady sees nobody nor are the best apartments above-stairs to be
viewed till she is either absent or gone into the country which she
talks of doing in a fortnight or three weeks at farthest and to live
there retired 

what mr lovelace saw of the house which were the saloon and two
parlours was perfectly elegant and he was assured all is of a piece 
the offices are also very convenient coach-house and stables at hand 

he shall be very impatient he says till i see the whole nor will he 
if he finds he can have it look farther till i have seen it except any
thing else offer to my liking the price he values not 

he now does nothing but talk of the ceremony but not indeed of the day 
i don't want him to urge that but i wonder he does not 

he has just now received a letter from lady betty lawrance by a
particular hand the contents principally relating to an affair she has
in chancery but in the postscript she is pleased to say very respectful
things of me 

they are all impatient she says for the happy day being over which
they flatter themselves will ensure his reformation 

he hoped he told me that i would soon enable him to answer their wishes
and his own 

but my dear although the opportunity was so inviting he urged not for
the day which is the more extraordinary as he was so pressing for
marriage before we came to town 

he was very earnest with me to give him and four of his friends my
company on monday evening at a little collation miss martin and miss
horton cannot he says be there being engaged in a party of their own 
with two daughters of colonel solcombe and two nieces of sir anthony
holmes upon an annual occasion but mrs sinclair will be present and
she gave him hope of the company of a young lady of very great fortune
and merit miss partington an heiress to whom colonel sinclair it
seems in his lifetime was guardian and who therefore calls mrs 
sinclair mamma 

i desired to be excused he had laid me i said under a most
disagreeable necessity of appearing as a married person and i would see
as few people as possible who were to think me so 

he would not urge it he said if i were much averse but they were his
select friends men of birth and fortune who longed to see me it was
true he added that they as well as his friend doleman believed we
were married but they thought him under the restrictions that he had
mentioned to the people below i might be assured he told me that his
politeness before them should be carried into the highest degree of
reverence 

when he is set upon any thing there is no knowing as i have said
heretofore what one can do but i will not if i can help it be made
a show of especially to men of whose character and principles i have no
good opinion i am my dearest friend 

your ever affectionate
cl harlowe 


 see letter i of this volume see also vol ii letter xx 


 


 mr lovelace in his next letter gives an account of his quick return 
 of his reasons to the lady for it of her displeasure upon it and of
 her urging his absence from the safety she was in from the situation
 of the house except she were to be traced out by his visits  

i was confoundedly puzzled says he on this occasion and on her
insisting upon the execution of a too-ready offer which i made her to go
down to berks to bring up my cousin charlotte to visit and attend her 
i made miserable excuses and fearing that they would be mortally
resented as her passion began to rise upon my saying charlotte was
delicate which she took strangely wrong i was obliged to screen myself
behind the most solemn and explicit declarations 


 he then repeats those declarations to the same effect with the account
 she gives of them  

i began says he with an intention to keep my life of honour in view in
the declaration i made her but as it has been said of a certain orator
in the house of commons who more than once in a long speech convinced
himself as he went along and concluded against the side he set out
intending to favour so i in earnest pressed without reserve for
matrimony in the progress of my harangue which state i little thought of
urging upon her with so much strength and explicitness 


 he then values himself upon the delay that his proposal of taking and
 furnishing a house must occasion 

he wavers in his resolutions whether to act honourable or not by a merit
 so exalted 

he values himself upon his own delicacy in expressing his indignation
 against her friends for supposing what he pretends his heart rises
 against them for presuming to suppose  

but have i not reason says he to be angry with her for not praising me
for this my delicacy when she is so ready to call me to account for the
least failure in punctilio however i believe i can excuse her too 
upon this generous consideration  for generous i am sure it is because
it is against myself   that her mind being the essence of delicacy the
least want of it shocks her while the meeting with what is so very
extraordinary to me is too familiar to her to obtain her notice as an
extraordinary 


 he glories in the story of the house and of the young widow possessor
 of it mrs fretchville he calls her and leaves it doubtful to mr 
 belford whether it be a real or a fictitious story 

he mentions his different proposals in relation to the ceremony which he
 so earnestly pressed for and owns his artful intention in avoiding to
 name the day  

and now says he i hope soon to have an opportunity to begin my
operations since all is halcyon and security 

it is impossible to describe the dear creature's sweet and silent
confusion when i touched upon the matrimonial topics 

she may doubt she may fear the wise in all important cases will
doubt and will fear till they are sure but her apparent willingness
to think well of a spirit so inventive and so machinating is a happy
prognostic for me o these reasoning ladies how i love these reasoning
ladies tis all over with them when once love has crept into their
hearts for then will they employ all their reasoning powers to excuse
rather than to blame the conduct of the doubted lover let appearances
against him be ever so strong 

mowbray belton and tourville long to see my angel and will be there 
she has refused me but must be present notwithstanding so generous a
spirit as mine is cannot enjoy its happiness without communication if i
raise not your envy and admiration both at once but half-joy will be the
joy of having such a charming fly entangled in my web she therefore
must comply and thou must come and then i will show thee the pride and
glory of the harlowe family my implacable enemies and thou shalt join
with me in my triumph over them all 

i know not what may still be the perverse beauty's fate i want thee 
therefore to see and admire her while she is serene and full of hope 
before her apprehensions are realized if realized they are to be and if
evil apprehensions of me she really has before her beamy eyes have lost
their lustre while yet her charming face is surrounded with all its
virgin glories and before the plough of disappointment has thrown up
furrows of distress upon every lovely feature 

if i can procure you this honour you will be ready to laugh out as i
have often much ado to forbear at the puritanical behaviour of the
mother before this lady not an oath not a curse nor the least free
word escapes her lips she minces in her gait she prims up her
horse-mouth her voice which when she pleases is the voice of
thunder is sunk into an humble whine her stiff hams that have not
been bent to a civility for ten years past are now limbered into
courtesies three deep at ever word her fat arms are crossed before
her and she can hardly be prevailed upon to sit in the presence of my
goddess 

i am drawing up instructions for ye all to observe on monday night 


saturday night 

most confoundedly alarmed lord sir what do you think cried dorcas
 my lady is resolved to go to church to-morrow i was at quadrille with
the women below to church said i and down i laid my cards to
church repeated they each looking upon the other we had done playing
for that night 

who could have dreamt of such a whim as this without notice without
questions her clothes not come no leave asked impossible she should
think of being my wife besides she don't consider if she go to
church i must go too yet not to ask for my company her brother and
singleton ready to snap her up as far as she knows known by her
clothes her person her features so distinguished not such another
woman in england to church of all places is the devil in the girl 
said i as soon as i could speak 

well but to leave this subject till to-morrow morning i will now give
you the instructions i have drawn up for your's and your companions'
behaviour on monday night 


 


instructions to be observed by john belford richard mowbray thomas
 belton and james tourville esquires of the body to general robert
 lovelace on their admission to the presence of his goddess 

ye must be sure to let it sink deep into your heavy heads that there is
no such lady in the world as miss clarissa harlowe and that she is
neither more nor less than mrs lovelace though at present to my shame
be it spoken a virgin 

be mindful also that your old mother's name after that of her mother
when a maid is sinclair that her husband was a lieutenant-colonel and
all that you belford know from honest doleman's letter of her that
let your brethren know 


 see letter xxxviii vol iii 


mowbray and tourville the two greatest blunderers of the four i allow
to be acquainted with the widow and nieces from the knowledge they had
of the colonel they will not forbear familiarities of speech to the
mother as of longer acquaintance than a day so i have suited their
parts to their capacities 

they may praise the widow and the colonel for people of great honour but
not too grossly nor to labour the point so as to render themselves
suspected 

the mother will lead ye into her own and the colonel's praises and
tourville and mowbray may be both her vouchers i and you and belton 
must be only hearsay confirmers 

as poverty is generally suspectible the widow must be got handsomely
aforehand and no doubt but she is the elegance of her house and
furniture and her readiness to discharge all demands upon her which
she does with ostentation enough and which makes her neighbours i
suppose like her the better demonstrate this she will propose to do
handsome things by her two nieces sally is near marriage with an
eminent woollen-draper in the strand if ye have a mind to it for there
are five or six of them there 

the nieces may be inquired after since they will be absent as persons
respected by mowbray and tourville for their late worthy uncle's sake 

watch ye diligently every turn of my countenance every motion of my eye 
for in my eye and in my countenance will ye find a sovereign regulator 
i need not bid you respect me mightily your allegiance obliges you to
that and who that sees me respects me not 

priscilla partington for her looks so innocent and discretion so deep 
yet seeming so softly may be greatly relied upon she will accompany
the mother gorgeously dressed with all her jew's extravagance flaming
out upon her and first induce then countenance the lady she has her
cue and i hope will make her acquaintance coveted by my charmer 

miss partington's history is this the daughter of colonel sinclair's
brother-in-law that brother-in-law may have been a turkey-merchant or
any merchant who died confoundedly rich the colonel one of her
guardians  collateral credit in that to the old one   whence she always
calls mrs sinclair mamma though not succeeding to the trust 

she is just come to pass a day or two and then to return to her
surviving guardian's at barnet 

miss partington has suitors a little hundred her grandmother an
alderman's dowager having left her a great additional fortune and is
not trusted out of her guardian's house without an old governante noted
for discretion except to her mamma sinclair with whom now-and-then she
is permitted to be for a week together 

pris will mamma-up mrs sinclair and will undertake to court her
guardian to let her pass a delightful week with her sir edward holden he
may as well be if your shallow pates will not be clogged with too many
circumstantials lady holden perhaps will come with her for she
always delighted in her mamma sinclair's company and talks of her and
her good management twenty times a day 

be it principally thy part jack who art a parading fellow and aimest
at wisdom to keep thy brother-varlets from blundering for as thou must
have observed from what i have written we have the most watchful and
most penetrating lady in the world to deal with a lady worth deceiving 
but whose eyes will piece to the bottom of your shallow souls the moment
she hears you open do you therefore place thyself between mowbray and
tourville their toes to be played upon and commanded by thine if they
go wrong thy elbows to be the ministers of approbation 

as to your general behaviour no hypocrisy i hate it so does my
charmer if i had studied for it i believe i could have been an
hypocrite but my general character is so well known that i should have
been suspected at once had i aimed at making myself too white but what
necessity can there be for hypocrisy unless the generality of the sex
were to refuse us for our immoralities the best of them love to have
the credit for reforming us let the sweet souls try for it if they
fail their intent was good that will be a consolation to them and as
to us our work will be the easier our sins the fewer since they will
draw themselves in with a very little of our help and we shall save a
parcel of cursed falsehoods and appear to be what we are both to angels
and men mean time their very grandmothers will acquit us and reproach
them with their self-do self-have and as having erred against
knowledge and ventured against manifest appearances what folly 
therefore for men of our character to be hypocrites 

be sure to instruct the rest and do thou thyself remember not to talk
obscenely you know i never permitted any of you to talk obscenely 
time enough for that when ye grow old and can only talk besides ye
must consider prisc s affected character my goddess's real one far
from obscenity therefore do not so much as touch upon the double
entendre what as i have often said cannot you touch a lady's heart
without wounding her ear 

it is necessary that ye should appear worse men than myself you cannot
help appearing so you'll say well then there will be the less
restraint upon you the less restraint the less affectation and if
belton begins his favourite subject in behalf of keeping it may make me
take upon myself to oppose him but fear not i shall not give the
argument all my force 

she must have some curiosity i think to see what sort of men my
companions are she will not expect any of you to be saints are you
not men born to considerable fortunes although ye are not all of you
men of parts who is it in this mortal life that wealth does not
mislead and as it gives people the power of being mischievous does it
not require great virtue to forbear the use of that power is not the
devil said to be the god of this world are we not children of this
world well then let me tell thee my opinion it is this that were it
not for the poor and the middling the world would probably long ago 
have been destroyed by fire from heaven ungrateful wretches the rest 
thou wilt be apt to say to make such sorry returns as they generally do
make to the poor and the middling 

this dear lady is prodigiously learned in theories but as to practices 
as to experimentals must be as you know from her tender years a mere
novice till she knew me i dare say she did not believe whatever she
had read that there were such fellows in the world as she will see in
you four i shall have much pleasure in observing how she'll stare at
her company when she finds me the politest man of the five 

and so much for instructions general and particular for your behaviour on
monday night 

and let me add that you must attend to every minute circumstance whether
you think there be reason for it or not deep like golden ore 
frequently lies my meaning and richly worth digging for the hint of
least moment as you may imagine it is often pregnant with events of the
greatest be implicit am i not your general did i ever lead you on
that i brought you not off with safety and success sometimes to your own
stupid astonishment 

and now methinks thou art curious to know what can be my view in
risquing the displeasure of my fair-one and alarming her fears after
four or five halcyon days have gone over our heads i'll satisfy thee 

the visiters of the two nieces will crowd the house beds will be
scarce miss partington a sweet modest genteel girl will be
prodigiously taken with my charmer will want to begin a friendship with
her a share in her bed for one night only will be requested who
knows but on that very monday night i may be so unhappy as to give
mortal offence to my beloved the shyest birds may be caught napping 
should she attempt to fly me upon it cannot i detain her should she
actually fly cannot i bring her back by authority civil or uncivil if
i have evidence upon evidence that she acknowledged though but tacitly 
her marriage and should i or should i not succeed and she forgive me 
or if she but descend to expostulate or if she bear me in her sight 
then will she be all my own all delicacy is my charmer i long to see
how such a delicacy on any of these occasions will behave and in my
situation it behoves me to provide against every accident 

i must take care knowing what an eel i have to do with that the little
riggling rogue does not slip through my fingers how silly should i
look staring after her when she had shot from me into the muddy river 
her family from which with so much difficulty i have taken her 

well then here are let me see how many persons are there who after
monday night will be able to swear that she has gone by my name 
answered to my name had no other view in leaving her friends but to go
by my name her own relations neither able nor willing to deny it 
first here are my servants her servant dorcas mrs sinclair mrs 
sinclair's two nieces and miss partington 

but for fear these evidences should be suspected here comes the jet of
the business no less than four worthy gentlemen of fortune and family 
who were all in company such a night particularly at a collation to
which they were invited by robert lovelace of sandoun-hall in the
county of lancaster esquire in company with magdalen sinclair widow 
and priscilla partington spinster and the lady complainant when the
said robert lovelace addressed himself to the said lady on a multitude
of occasions as his wife as they and others did as mrs lovelace 
every one complimenting and congratulating her upon her nuptials and
that she received such their compliments and congratulations with no
other visible displeasure or repugnance than such as a young bride full
of blushes and pretty confusion might be supposed to express upon such
contemplative revolvings as those compliments would naturally inspire 
nor do thou rave at me jack nor rebel dost think i brought the dear
creature hither for nothing 

and here's a faint sketch of my plot stand by varlets tanta-ra-ra-ra 
 veil your bonnets and confess your master 



letter v

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday 


have been at church jack behaved admirably well too my charmer is
pleased with me now for i was exceedingly attentive to the discourse 
and very ready in the auditor's part of the service eyes did not much
wander how could they when the loveliest object infinitely the
loveliest in the whole church was in my view 

dear creature how fervent how amiable in her devotions i have got
her to own that she prayed for me i hope a prayer from so excellent a
mind will not be made in vain 

there is after all something beautifully solemn in devotion the
sabbath is a charming institution to keep the heart right when it is
right one day in seven how reasonable i think i'll go to church once
a day often i fancy it will go a great way towards making me a reformed
man to see multitudes of well-appearing people all joining in one
reverend act an exercise how worthy of a rational being yet it adds a
sting or two to my former stings when i think of my projects with regard
to this charming creature in my conscience i believe if i were to go
constantly to church i could not pursue them 

i had a scheme come into my head while there but i will renounce it 
because it obtruded itself upon me in so good a place excellent
creature how many ruins has she prevented by attaching me to herself
 by engrossing my whole attention 

but let me tell thee what passed between us in my first visit of this
morning and then i will acquaint thee more largely with my good
behaviour at church 

i could not be admitted till after eight i found her ready prepared to
go out i pretended to be ignorant of her intention having charged
dorcas not to own that she had told me of it 

going abroad madam with an air of indifference 

yes sir i intend to go to church 

i hope madam i shall have the honour to attend you 

no she designed to take a chair and go to the next church 

this startled me a chair to carry her to the next church from mrs 
sinclair's her right name not sinclair and to bring her back hither
in the face of people who might not think well of the house there was
no permitting that yet i was to appear indifferent but said i should
take it for a favour if she would permit me to attend her in a coach as
there was time for it to st paul's 

she made objections to the gaiety of my dress and told me that if she
went to st paul's she could go in a coach without me 

i objected singleton and her brother and offered to dress in the
plainest suit i had 

i beg the favour of attending you dear madam said i i have not been
at church a great while we shall sit in different stalls and the next
time i go i hope it will be to give myself a title to the greatest
blessing i can receive 

she made some further objections but at last permitted me the honour of
attending her 

i got myself placed in her eye that the time might not seem tedious to
me for we were there early and i gained her good opinion as i
mentioned above by my behaviour 

the subject of the discourse was particular enough it was about a
prophet's story or parable of an ewe-lamb taken by a rich man from a poor
one who dearly loved it and whose only comfort it was designed to
strike remorse into david on his adultery with uriah's wife bathsheba 
and his murder of the husband these women jack have been the occasion
of all manner of mischief from the beginning now when david full of
indignation swore  king david would swear jack but how shouldst thou
know who king david was the story is in the bible   that the rich man
should surely die nathan which was the prophet's name and a good
ingenious fellow cried out which were the words of the text thou art
the man by my soul i thought the parson looked directly at me and at
that moment i cast my eye full on my ewe-lamb but i must tell thee too 
that that i thought a good deal of my rosebud a better man than king
david in that point however thought i 

when we came home we talked upon the subject and i showed my charmer my
attention to the discourse by letting her know where the doctor made the
most of his subject and where it might have been touched to greater
advantage for it is really a very affecting story and has as pretty a
contrivance in it as ever i read and this i did in such a grave way 
that she seemed more and more pleased with me and i have no doubt that
i shall get her to favour me to-morrow night with her company at my
collation 


sunday evening 

we all dined together in mrs sinclair's parlour all excessively right 
the two nieces have topped their parts mrs sinclair her's never was
so easy as now she really thought a little oddly of these people at
first she said mrs sinclair seemed very forbidding her nieces were
persons with whom she could not wish to be acquainted but really we
should not be too hasty in our censures some people improve upon us 
the widow seems tolerable  she went no farther than tolerable miss
martin and miss horton are young people of good sense and have read a
great deal what miss martin particularly said of marriage and of her
humble servant was very solid she believes with such notions she
cannot make a bad wife  i have said sally's humble servant is a woolen-
draper of great reputation and she is soon to be married 

i have been letting her into thy character and into the characters of my
other three esquires in hopes to excite her curiosity to see you
to-morrow night i have told her some of the worst as well as best
parts of your characters in order to exalt myself and to obviate any
sudden surprizes as well as to teach her what sort of men she may expect
to see if she will oblige me with her company 

by her after-observation upon each of you i shall judge what i may or
may not do to obtain or keep her good opinion what she will like or
what not and so pursue the one or avoid the other as i see proper so 
while she is penetrating into your shallow heads i shall enter her
heart and know what to bid my own to hope for 

the house is to be taken in three weeks all will be over in three
weeks or bad will be my luck who knows but in three days have i not
carried that great point of making her pass for my wife to the people
below and that other great one of fixing myself here night and day 
 what woman ever escaped me who lodged under one roof with me the
house too the house the people people after my own heart her
servants will and dorcas both my servants three days did i say 
pho pho pho three hours 


 


i have carried my third point but so extremely to the dislike of my
charmer that i have been threatened for suffering miss partington to be
introduced to her without her leave which laid her under a necessity to
deny or comply with the urgent request of so fine a young lady who had
engaged to honour me at my collation on condition that my beloved would
be present at it 

to be obliged to appear before my friends as what she was not she was
for insisting that i should acquaint the women here with the truth of
the matter and not go on propagating stories for her to countenance 
making her a sharer in my guilt 

but what points will not perseverance carry especially when it is
covered over with the face of yielding now and parthian-like returning
to the charge anon do not the sex carry all their points with their men
by the same methods have i conversed with them so freely as i have
done and learnt nothing of them didst thou ever know that a woman's
denial of any favour whether the least or the greatest that my heart
was set upon stood her in any stead the more perverse she the more
steady i that is my rule 

but the point thus so much against her will carried i doubt thou will
see in her more of a sullen than of an obliging charmer for when miss
partington was withdrawn what was miss partington to her in her
situation she wanted no new acquaintances and what were my four friends
to her in her present circumstances she would assure me if ever again'
 and there she stopped with a twirl of her hand 

when we meet i will in her presence tipping thee a wink show thee the
motion for it was a very pretty one quite new yet have i seen an
hundred pretty passionate twirls too in my time from other fair-ones 
how universally engaging is it to put a woman of sense to whom a man is
not married in a passion let the reception given to every ranting
scene in our plays testify take care my charmer now thou art come to
delight me with thy angry twirls that thou temptest me not to provoke a
variety of them from one whose every motion whose every air carries in
it so much sense and soul 

but angry or pleased this charming creature must be all loveliness 
her features are all harmony and made for one another no other feature
could be substituted in the place of any one of her's but most abate of
her perfection and think you that i do not long to have your opinion of
my fair prize 

if you love to see features that glow though the heart is frozen and
never yet was thawed if you love fine sense and adages flowing through
teeth of ivory and lips of coral an eye that penetrates all things a
voice that is harmony itself an air of grandeur mingled with a
sweetness that cannot be described a politeness that if ever equaled 
was never excelled you'll see all these excellencies and ten times
more in this my gloriana 

 mark her majestic fabric she's a temple 
 sacred by birth and built by hands divine 
 her soul the deity that lodges there 
 nor is the pile unworthy of the god 

or to describe her in a softer style with rowe 

 the bloom of op'ning flow'rs unsully'd beauty 
 softness and sweetest innocence she wears 
 and looks like nature in the world's first spring 

adieu varlets four at six on monday evening i expect ye all 



letter vi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
sunday april 30 


 mr lovelace in his last letters having taken notice of the most
 material passages contained in this letter the following extracts
 from it are only inserted 

she gives pretty near the same account that he does of what passed
 between them on her resolution to go to church and of his proposal
 of st paul's and desire of attending her she praises his good
 behaviour there as also the discourse and the preacher is pleased
 with its seasonableness gives particulars of the conversation
 between them afterwards and commends the good observations he makes
 upon the sermon  

i am willing says she to have hopes of him but am so unable to know
how to depend upon his seriousness for an hour together that all my
favourable accounts of him in this respect must be taken with allowance 

being very much pressed i could not tell how to refuse dining with the
widow and her nieces this day i am better pleased with them than i ever
thought i should be i cannot help blaming myself for my readiness to
give severe censures where reputation is concerned people's ways 
humours constitutions education and opportunities allowed for my
dear many persons as far as i know may appear blameless whom others 
of different humours and educations are too apt to blame and who from
the same fault may be as ready to blame them i will therefore make it
a rule to myself for the future never to judge peremptorily on first
appearances but yet i must observe that these are not people i should
choose to be intimate with or whose ways i can like although for the
stations they are in they may go through the world with tolerable
credit 

mr lovelace's behaviour has been such as makes me call this so far as
it is passed an agreeable day yet when easiest as to him my
situation with my friends takes place in my thoughts and causes me many
a tear 

i am the more pleased with the people of the house because of the
persons of rank they are acquainted with and who visits them 


sunday evening 

i am still well pleased with mr lovelace's behaviour we have had a
good deal of serious discourse together the man has really just and
good notions he confesses how much he is pleased with this day and
hopes for many such nevertheless he ingenuously warned me that his
unlucky vivacity might return but he doubted not that he should be
fixed at last by my example and conversation 

he has given me an entertaining account of the four gentlemen he is to
meet to-morrow night entertaining i mean for his humourous description
of their persons manners etc but such a description as is far from
being to their praise yet he seemed rather to design to divert my
melancholy by it than to degrade them i think at bottom my dear that
he must be a good-natured man but that he was spoiled young for want
of check or controul 

i cannot but call this my circumstances considered an happy day to the
end of it indeed my dear i think i could prefer him to all the men i
ever knew were he but to be always what he has been this day you see
how ready i am to own all you have charged me with when i find myself
out it is a difficult thing i believe sometimes for a young creature
that is able to deliberate with herself to know when she loves or when
she hates but i am resolved as much as possible to be determined both
in my hatred and love by actions as they make the man worthy or unworthy 


 she dates again monday and declares herself highly displeased at miss
 partington's being introduced to her and still more for being obliged
 to promise to be present at mr lovelace's collation she foresees 
 she says a murder'd evening  



letter vii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
monday night may 1 


i have just escaped from a very disagreeable company i was obliged so
much against my will to be in as a very particular relation of this
evening's conversation would be painful to me you must content yourself
with what you shall be able to collect from the outlines as i may call
them of the characters of the persons assisted by the little histories
mr lovelace gave me of each yesterday 

the names of the gentlemen are belton mowbray tourville and belford 
these four with mrs sinclair miss partington the great heiress
mentioned in my last mr lovelace and myself made up the company 

i gave you before the favourable side of miss partington's character 
such as it was given to me by mrs sinclair and her nieces i will now
add a few words from my own observation upon her behaviour in this
company 

in better company perhaps she would have appeared to less disadvantage 
but notwithstanding her innocent looks which mr lovelace also highly
praised he is the last person whose judgment i would take upon real
modesty for i observed that upon some talk from the gentlemen not
free enough to be easily censured yet too indecent in its implication to
come from well-bred persons in the company of virtuous prople  sic  
this young lady was very ready to apprehend and yet by smiles and
simperings to encourage rather than discourage the culpable freedoms
of persons who in what they went out of their way to say must either
be guilty of absurdity meaning nothing or meaning something of
rudeness 


 mr belford in letter xiii of vol v reminds mr lovelace of some
particular topics which passed in their conversation extremely to the
lady's honour 


but indeed i have seen no women of whom i had a better opinion than i
can say of mrs sinclair who have allowed gentlemen and themselves too 
in greater liberties of this sort than i had thought consistent with that
purity of manners which ought to be the distinguishing characteristic of
our sex for what are words but the body and dress of thought and is
not the mind of a person strongly indicated by outward dress 

but to the gentlemen as they must be called in right of their ancestors 
it seems for no other do they appear to have 

mr belton has had university education and was designed for the gown 
but that not suiting with the gaiety of his temper and an uncle dying 
who devised to him a good estate he quitted the college came up to
town and commenced fine gentleman he is said to be a man of sense 
mr belton dresses gaily but not quite foppishly drinks hard keeps all
hours and glories in doing so games and has been hurt by that
pernicious diversion he is about thirty years of age his face is a
fiery red somewhat bloated and pimply and his irregularities threaten a
brief duration to the sensual dream he is in for he has a short
consumption cough which seems to denote bad lungs yet makes himself and
his friends merry by his stupid and inconsiderate jests upon very
threatening symptoms which ought to make him more serious 

mr mowbray has been a great traveller speaks as many languages as mr 
lovelace himself but not so fluently is of a good family seems to be
about thirty-three or thirty-four tall and comely in his person bold
and daring in his look is a large-boned strong man has a great scar in
his forehead with a dent as if his skull had been beaten in there and
a seamed scar in his right cheek he likewise dresses very gaily has his
servants always about him whom he is continually calling upon and
sending on the most trifling messages half a dozen instances of which we
had in the little time i was among them while they seem to watch the
turn of his fierce eye to be ready to run before they have half his
message and serve him with fear and trembling yet to his equals the
man seems tolerable he talks not amiss upon public entertainments and
diversions especially upon those abroad yet has a romancing air and
avers things strongly which seem quite improbable indeed he doubts
nothing but what he ought to believe for he jests upon sacred things 
and professes to hate the clergy of all religions he has high notions
of honour a world hardly ever out of his mouth but seems to have no
great regard to morals 

mr tourville occasionally told his age just turned of thirty-one he
is also of an ancient family but in his person and manners more of what
i call the coxcomb than any of his companions he dresses richly 
would be thought elegant in the choice and fashion of what he wears yet 
after all appears rather tawdry than fine one sees by the care he
takes of his outside and the notice he bespeaks from every one by his
own notice of himself that the inside takes up the least of his
attention he dances finely mr lovelace says is a master of music 
and singing is one of his principal excellencies they prevailed upon
him to sing and he obliged them both in italian and french and to do
him justice his songs in both were decent they were all highly
delighted with his performance but his greatest admirers were mrs 
sinclair miss partington and himself to me he appeared to have a
great deal of affectation 

mr tourville's conversation and address are insufferably full of those
really gross affronts upon the understanding of our sex which the
moderns call compliments and are intended to pass for so many instances
of good breeding though the most hyperbolical unnatural stuff that can
be conceived and which can only serve to show the insincerity of the
complimenter and the ridiculous light in which the complimented appears
in his eyes if he supposes a woman capable of relishing the romantic
absurdities of his speeches 

he affects to introduce into his common talk italian and french words 
and often answers an english question in french which language he greatly
prefers to the barbarously hissing english but then he never fails to
translate into this his odious native tongue the words and the sentences
he speaks in the other two lest perhaps it should be questioned
whether he understands what he says 

he loves to tell stories always calls them merry facetious good or
excellent before he begins in order to bespeak the attention of the
hearers but never gives himself concern in the progress or conclusion of
them to make good what he promises in his preface indeed he seldom
brings any of them to a conclusion for if his company have patience to
hear him out he breaks in upon himself by so many parenthetical
intrusions as one may call them and has so many incidents springing in
upon him that he frequently drops his own thread and sometimes sits
down satisfied half way or if at other times he would resume it he
applies to his company to help him in again with a devil fetch him if he
remembers what he was driving at but enough and too much of mr 
tourville 

mr belford is the fourth gentleman and one of whom mr lovelace seems
more fond than any of the rest for he is a man of tried bravery it
seems and this pair of friends came acquainted upon occasion of a
quarrel possibly about a woman which brought on a challenge and a
meeting at kensington gravel-pits which ended without unhappy
consequences by the mediation of three gentlemen strangers just as each
had made a pass at the other 

mr belford it seems is about seven or eight and twenty he is the
youngest of the five except mr lovelace and they are perhaps the
wickedest for they seem to lead the other three as they please mr 
belford as the others dresses gaily but has not those advantages of
person nor from his dress which mr lovelace is too proud of he has 
however the appearance and air of a gentleman he is well read in
classical authors and in the best english poets and writers and by his
means the conversation took now and then a more agreeable turn and i 
who endeavoured to put the best face i could upon my situation as i
passed for mrs lovelace with them made shift to join in it at such
times and received abundance of compliments from all the company on the
observations i made 


 see letter xiii of vol v above referred to 


mr belford seems good-natured and obliging and although very
complaisant not so fulsomely so as mr tourville and has a polite and
easy manner of expressing his sentiments on all occasions he seems to
delight in a logical way of argumentation as also does mr belton 
these two attacked each other in this way and both looked at us women 
as if to observe whether we did not admire this learning or when they
had said a smart thing their wit but mr belford had visibly the
advantage of the other having quicker parts and by taking the worst
side of the argument seemed to think he had upon the whole of his
behaviour and conversation he put me in mind of that character of
milton 

 his tongue
 dropt manna and could make the worse appear
 the better reason to perplex and dash
 maturest counsels for his thoughts were low 
 to vice industrious but to nobler deeds
 tim'rous and slothful yet he pleased the ear 

how little soever matters in general may be to our liking we are apt 
when hope is strong enough to permit it to endeavour to make the best we
can of the lot we have drawn and i could not but observe often how much
mr lovelace excelled all his four friends in every thing they seemed
desirous to excel in but as to wit and vivacity he had no equal there 
all the others gave up to him when his lips began to open the haughty
mowbray would call upon the prating tourville for silence when lovelace
was going to speak and when he had spoken the words charming fellow 
with a free word of admiration or envy fell from every mouth 

he has indeed so many advantages in his person and manner that what
would be inexcusable in another would if one watched not over one's
self and did not endeavour to distinguish what is the essence of right
and wrong look becoming in him 

mr belford to my no small vexation and confusion with the forwardness
of a favoured and intrusted friend singled me out on mr lovelace's
being sent for down to make me congratulatory compliments on my supposed
nuptials which he did with a caution not to insist too long on the
rigorous vow i had imposed upon a man so universally admired 

see him among twenty men  said he all of distinction and nobody is
regarded but mr lovelace 

it must indeed be confessed that there is in his whole deportment a
natural dignity which renders all insolent or imperative demeanour as
unnecessary as inexcusable then that deceiving sweetness which appears
in his smiles in his accent in his whole aspect and address when he
thinks it worth his while to oblige or endeavour to attract how does
this show that he was born innocent as i may say that he was not
naturally the cruel the boisterous the impetuous creature which the
wicked company he may have fallen into have made him for he has 
besides as open and i think an honest countenance don't you think
so my dear on all these specious appearances have i founded my hopes
of seeing him a reformed man 

but it is amazing to me i own that with so much of the gentleman such
a general knowledge of books and men such a skill in the learned as well
as modern languages he can take so much delight as he does in the
company of such persons as i have described and in subjects of frothy
impertinence unworthy of his talents and his natural and acquired
advantages i can think but of one reason for it and that must argue a
very low mind his vanity which makes him desirous of being considered
as the head of the people he consorts with a man to love praise yet to
be content to draw it from such contaminated springs 

one compliment passed from mr belford to mr lovelace which hastened my
quitting the shocking company you are a happy man mr lovelace  said
he upon some fine speeches made him by mrs sinclair and assented to by
miss partington you have so much courage and so much wit that
neither man nor woman can stand before you 

mr belford looked at me when he spoke yes my dear he smilingly looked
at me and he looked upon his complimented friend and all their
assenting and therefore affronting eyes both men's and women's were
turned upon your clarissa at least my self-reproaching heart made me
think so for that would hardly permit my eye to look up 

oh my dear were but a woman who gives reason to the world to think her
to be in love with a man  and this must be believed to be my case or to
what can my supposed voluntary going off with mr lovelace be imputed  
to reflect one moment on the exaltation she gives him and the disgrace
she brings upon herself the low pity the silent contempt the insolent
sneers and whispers to which she makes herself obnoxious from a
censuring world of both sexes how would she despise herself and how
much more eligible would she think death itself than such a discovered
debasement 

what i have thus in general touched upon will account to you why i could
not more particularly relate what passed in this evening's conversation 
which as may be gathered from what i have written abounded with
approbatory accusations and supposed witty retorts 



letter viii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
monday midnight 


i am very much vexed and disturbed at an odd incident mrs sinclair has
just now left me i believe in displeasure on my declining to comply
with a request she made me which was to admit miss partington to a
share in my bed her house being crowded by her nieces's guests and by
their attendants as well as by those of miss partington 

there might be nothing in it and my denial carried a stiff and ill-
natured appearance but instantly upon her making the request it came
into my thought that i was in a manner a stranger to every body in the
house not so much as a servant i could call my own or of whom i had any
great opinion that there were four men of free manners in the house 
avowed supporters of mr lovelace in matters of offence himself a man of
enterprise all as far as i knew and as i had reason to think by their
noisy mirth after i left them drinking deeply that miss partington
herself is not so bashful a person as she was represented to me to be 
that officious pains were taken to give me a good opinion of her and
that mrs sinclair made a greater parade in prefacing the request than
such a request needed to deny thought i can carry only an appearance
of singularity to people who already think me singular to consent may
possibly if not probably be attended with inconveniencies the
consequences of the alternative so very disproportionate i thought it
more prudent to incur the censure than to risque the inconvenience 

i told her that i was writing a long letter that i should choose to
write till i were sleepy and that a companion would be a restraint upon
me and i upon her 

she was loth she said that so delicate a young creature and so great
a fortune as miss partington should be put to lie with dorcas in a
press-bed she should be very sorry if she had asked an improper thing 
she had never been so put to it before and miss would stay up with her
till i had done writing 

alarmed at this urgency and it being easier to persist in a denial
given than to give it at first i said miss partington should be
welcome to my whole bed and i would retire into the dining-room and
there locking myself in write all the night 

the poor thing she said was afraid to lie alone to be sure miss
partington would not put me to such an inconvenience 

she then withdrew but returned begged my pardon for returning but the
poor child she said was in tears miss partington had never seen a
young lady she so much admired and so much wished to imitate as me the
dear girl hoped that nothing had passed in her behaviour to give me
dislike to her should she bring her to me 

i was very busy i said the letter i was writing was upon a very
important subject i hoped to see the young lady in the morning when i
would apologize to her for my particularity and then mrs sinclair
hesitating and moving towards the door though she turned round to me
again i desired her lighting her to take care how she went down 

pray madam said she on the stairs-head don't give yourself all this
trouble god knows my heart i meant no affront but since you seem to
take my freedom amiss i beg you will not acquaint mr lovelace with it 
for he perhaps will think me bold and impertinent 

now my dear is not this a particular incident either as i have made
it or as it was designed i don't love to do an uncivil thing and if
nothing were meant by the request my refusal deserves to be called
uncivil then i have shown a suspicion of foul usage by it which surely
dare not be meant if just i ought to apprehend every thing and fly
the house and the man as i would an infection if not just and if i
cannot contrive to clear myself of having entertained suspicions by
assigning some other plausible reason for my denial the very staying
here will have an appearance not at all reputable to myself 

i am now out of humour with him with myself with all the world but
you his companions are shocking creatures why again i repeat should
he have been desirous to bring me into such company once more i like
him not indeed i do not like him 



letter ix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
tuesday may 2 


with infinite regret i am obliged to tell you that i can no longer write
to you or receive letters from you your mother has sent me a letter
enclosed in a cover to mr lovelace directed for him at lord m s and
which was brought him just now reproaching me on this subject in very
angry terms and forbidding me as i would not be thought to intend to
make her and you unhappy to write to you without her leave 

this therefore is the last you must receive from me till happier days 
and as my prospects are not very bad i presume we shall soon have leave
to write again and even to see each other since an alliance with a
family so honourable as mr lovelace's is will not be a disgrace 

she is pleased to write that if i would wish to inflame you i should
let you know her written prohibition but if otherwise find some way of
my own accord without bringing her into the question to decline a
correspondence which i must know she has for some time past forbidden 
but all i can say is to beg of you not to be inflamed to beg of you not
to let her know or even by your behaviour to her on this occasion 
guess that i have acquainted you with my reason for declining to write
to you for how else after the scruples i have heretofore made on this
very subject yet proceeding to correspond can i honestly satisfy you
about my motives for this sudden stop so my dear i choose you see 
rather to rely upon your discretion than to feign reasons with which you
would not be satisfied but with your usual active penetration sift to
the bottom and at last find me to be a mean and low qualifier and that
with an implication injurious to you that i supposed you had not
prudence enough to be trusted with the naked truth 

i repeat that my prospects are not bad the house i presume will
soon be taken the people here are very respectful notwithstanding my
nicety about miss partington miss martin who is near marriage with an
eminent tradesman in the strand just now in a very respectful manner 
asked my opinion of some patterns of rich silks for the occasion the
widow has a less forbidding appearance than at first mr lovelace on
my declared dislike of his four friends has assured me that neither they
nor any body else shall be introduced to me without my leave 

these circumstances i mention as you will suppose that your kind heart
may be at ease about me that you may be induced by them to acquiesce
with your mother's commands cheerfully acquiesce and that for my
sake lest i should be thought an inflamer who am with very contrary
intentions my dearest and best beloved friend 

your ever obliged and affectionate 
clarissa harlowe 



letter x

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
wedn may 3 


i am astonished that my mother should take such a step purely to
exercise an unreasonable act of authority and to oblige the most
remorseless hearts in the world if i find that i can be of use to you 
either by advice or information do you think i will not give it were
it to any other person much less dear to me than you are do you think 
in such a case i would forbear giving it 

mr hickman who pretends to a little casuistry in such nice matters is
of opinion that i ought not to decline such a correspondence thus
circumstanced and it is well he is for my mother having set me up i
must have somebody to quarrel with 

this i will come into if it will make you easy i will forbear to write
to you for a few days if nothing extraordinary happen and till the
rigour of her prohibition is abated but be assured that i will not
dispense with your writing to me my heart my conscience my honour 
will not permit it 

but how will i help myself how easily enough for i do assure you
that i want but very little farther provocation to fly privately to
london and if i do i will not leave you till i see you either
honourably married or absolutely quit of the wretch and in this last
case i will take you down with me in defiance of the whole world or 
if you refuse to go with me stay with you and accompany you as your
shadow whithersoever you go 

don't be frightened at this declaration there is but one consideration 
and but one hope that withhold me watched as i am in all my
retirements obliged to read to her without a voice to work in her
presence without fingers and to lie with her every night against my
will the consideration is lest you should apprehend that a step of
this nature would look like a doubling of your fault in the eyes of such
as think your going away a fault the hope is that things will still
end happily and that some people will have reason to take shame to
themselves for the sorry part they have acted nevertheless i am often
balancing but your resolving to give up the correspondence at this
crisis will turn the scale write therefore or take the consequence 

a few words upon the subject of your last letters i know not whether
your brother's wise project be given up or not a dead silence reigns in
your family your brother was absent three days then at home one and
is now absent but whether with singleton or not i cannot find out 

by your account of your wretch's companions i see not but they are a set
of infernals and he the beelzebub what could he mean as you say by
his earnestness to bring you into such company and to give you such an
opportunity to make him and them reflecting-glasses to one another the
man's a fool to be sure my dear a silly fellow at least the wretches
must put on their best before you no doubt lords of the creation 
noble fellows these yet who knows how many poor despicable souls of our
sex the worst of them has had to whine after him 

you have brought an inconvenience upon yourself as you observe by your
refusal of miss partington for your bedfellow pity you had not admitted
her watchful as you are what could have happened if violence were
intended he would not stay for the night you might have sat up after
her or not gone to bed mrs sinclair pressed it too far you was
over-scrupulous 

if any thing happen to delay your nuptials i would advise you to remove 
but if you marry perhaps you may think it no great matter to stay where
you are till you take possession of your own estate the knot once tied 
and with so resolute a man it is my opinion your relations will soon
resign what they cannot legally hold and were even a litigation to
follow you will not be able nor ought you to be willing to help it 
for your estate will then be his right and it will be unjust to wish it
to be withheld from him 

one thing i would advise you to think of and that is of proper
settlements it will be to the credit of your prudence and of his justice
 and the more as matters stand that something of this should be done
before you marry bad as he is nobody accounts him a sordid man and i
wonder he has been hitherto silent on that subject 

i am not displeased with his proposal about the widow lady's house i
think it will do very well but if it must be three weeks before you can
be certain about it surely you need not put off his day for that space 
and he may bespeak his equipages surprising to me as well as to you 
that he could be so acquiescent 

i repeat continue to write to me i insist upon it and that as
minutely as possible or take the consequence i send this by a
particular hand i am and ever will be 

your most affectionate 
anna howe 



letter xi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
thursday may 4 


i forego every other engagement i suspend ever wish i banish every
other fear to take up my pen to beg of you that you will not think of
being guilty of such an act of love as i can never thank you for but
must for ever regret if i must continue to write to you i must i
know full well your impatience of control when you have the least
imagination that your generosity or friendship is likely to be wondered
at 

my dearest dearest creature would you incur a maternal as i have a
paternal malediction would not the world think there was an infection
in my fault if it were to be followed by miss howe there are some
points so flagrantly wrong that they will not bear to be argued upon 
this is one of them i need not give reasons against such a rashness 
heaven forbid that it should be known that you had it but once in your
thought be your motives ever so noble and generous to follow so bad an
example the rather as that you would in such a case want the
extenuations that might be pleaded in my favour and particularly that
one of being surprised into the unhappy step 

the restraint your mother lays you under would not have appeared heavy to
you but on my account would you had once thought it a hardship to be
admitted to a part of her bed how did i use to be delighted with such
a favour from my mother how did i love to work in her presence so did
you in the presence of your's once and to read to her in winter
evenings i know was one of your joys do not give me cause to reproach
myself on the reason that may be assigned for the change in you 

learn my dear i beseech you learn to subdue your own passions be the
motives what they will excess is excess those passions in our sex 
which we take pains to subdue may have one and the same source with
those infinitely-blacker passions which we used so often to condemn in
the violent and headstrong of the other sex and which may only be
heightened in them by custom and their freer education let us both 
my dear ponder well this thought look into ourselves and fear 

if i write as i find i must i insist upon your forbearing to write 
your silence to this shall be the sign to me that you will not think of
the rashness you threaten me with and that you will obey your mother as
to your own part of the correspondence however especially as you can
inform or advise me in every weighty case by mr hickman's pen 

my trembling writing will show you my dear impetuous creature what a
trembling heart you have given to

your ever obliged 
or if you take so rash a step 
your for ever disobliged 
clarissa harlowe 


my clothes were brought to me just now but you have so much discomposed
me that i have no heart to look into the trunks why why my dear will
you fright me with your flaming love discomposure gives distress to a
weak heart whether it arise from friendship or enmity 

a servant of mr lovelace carries this to mr hickman for dispatch-sake 
let that worthy man's pen relieve my heart from this new uneasiness 



letter xii

mr hickman to miss clarissa harlowe
 sent to wilson's by a particular hand  
friday may 5 


madam 

i have the honour of dear miss howe's commands to acquaint you without
knowing the occasion that she is excessively concerned for the concern
she has given you in her last letter and that if you will but write to
her under cover as before she will have no thoughts of what you are so
very apprehensive about  yet she bid me write that if she had but the
least imagination that she can serve you and save you  those are her
words all the censures of the world will be but of second consideration
with her  i have great temptations on this occasion to express my own
resentments upon your present state but not being fully apprized of what
that is only conjecturing from the disturbance upon the mind of the
dearest lady in the world to me and the most sincere of friends to you 
that that is not altogether so happy as were to be wished and being 
moreover forbid to enter into the cruel subject i can only offer as i
do my best and faithfullest services and wish you a happy deliverance
from all your troubles for i am 

most excellent young lady 
your faithful and most obedient servant 
ch hickman 



letter xiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday may 2 


mercury as the fabulist tells us having the curiosity to know the
estimation he stood in among mortals descended in disguise and in a
statuary's shop cheapened a jupiter then a juno then one then another 
of the dii majores and at last asked what price that same statue of
mercury bore o sir says the artist buy one of the others and i'll
throw you in that for nothing 

how sheepish must the god of thieves look upon this rebuff to his vanity 

so thou a thousand pounds wouldst thou give for the good opinion of this
single lady to be only thought tolerably of and not quite unworthy of
her conversation would make thee happy and at parting last night or
rather this morning thou madest me promise a few lines to edgware to
let thee know what she thinks of thee and of thy brethren 

thy thousand pounds jack is all thy own for most heartily does she
dislike ye all thee as much as any of the rest 

i am sorry for it too as to thy part for two reasons one that i think
thy motive for thy curiosity was fear of consciousness whereas that of
the arch-thief was vanity intolerable vanity and he was therefore
justly sent away with a blush upon his cheeks to heaven and could not
brag the other that i am afraid if she dislikes thee she dislikes me 
for are we not birds of a feather 

i must never talk of reformation she told me having such companions 
and taking such delight as i seemed to take in their frothy
conversation 

i no more than you jack imagined she could possibly like ye but then 
as my friends i thought a person of her education would have been more
sparing of her censures 

i don't know how it is belford but women think themselves entitled to
take any freedoms with us while we are unpolite forsooth and i can't
tell what if we don't tell a pack of cursed lies and make black white 
in their favour teaching us to be hypocrites yet stigmatizing us at
other times for deceivers 

i defended ye all as well as i could but you know there was no
attempting aught but a palliative defence to one of her principles 

i will summarily give thee a few of my pleas 

to the pure every little deviation seemed offensive yet i saw not 
that there was any thing amiss the whole evening either in the words or
behaviour of any of my friends some people could talk but upon one or
two subjects she upon every one no wonder therefore they talked to
what they understood best and to mere objects of sense had she
honoured us with more of her conversation she would have been less
disgusted with ours for she saw how every one was prepared to admire
her whenever she opened her lips you in particular had said when
she retired that virtue itself spoke when she spoke but that you had
such an awe upon you after she had favoured us with an observation or
two on a subject started that you should ever be afraid in her company
to be found most exceptionable when you intended to be least so 

plainly she said she neither liked my companions nor the house she was
in 

i liked not the house any more than she though the people were very
obliging and she had owned they were less exceptionable to herself than
at first and were we not about another of our own 

she did not like miss partington let her fortune be what it would and
she had heard a great deal said of her fortune she should not choose an
intimacy with her she thought it was a hardship to be put upon such a
difficulty as she was put upon the preceding night when there were
lodgers in the front-house whom they had reason to be freer with than 
upon so short an acquaintance with her 

i pretended to be an utter stranger as to this particular and when she
explained herself upon it condemned mrs sinclair's request and called
it a confident one 

she artfully made lighter of her denial of the girl for a bedfellow 
than she thought of it i could see that for it was plain she supposed
there was room for me to think she had been either over-nice or over-
cautious 

i offered to resent mrs sinclair's freedom 

no there was no great matter in it it was best to let it pass it
might be thought more particular in her to deny such a request than in
mrs sinclair to make it or in miss partington to expect it to be
complied with but as the people below had a large acquaintance she did
not know how often she might indeed have her retirements invaded if she
gave way and indeed there were levities in the behaviour of that young
lady which she could not so far pass over as to wish an intimacy with
her 

i said i liked miss partington as little as she could miss partington
was a silly young creature who seemed to justify the watchfulness of her
guardians over her but nevertheless as to her own that i thought the
girl for girl she was as to discretion not exceptionable only
carrying herself like a free good-natured creature who believed herself
secure in the honour of her company 

it was very well said of me she replied but if that young lady were so
well satisfied with her company she must needs say that i was very kind
to suppose her such an innocent for her own part she had seen nothing
of the london world but thought she must tell me plainly that she
never was in such company in her life nor ever again wished to be in
such 

there belford worse off than mercury art thou not 

i was nettled hard would be the lot of more discreet women as far as i
knew that miss partington were they to be judged by so rigid a virtue
as hers 

not so she said but if i really saw nothing exceptionable to a virtuous
mind in that young person's behaviour my ignorance of better behaviour
was she must needs tell me as pitiable as hers and it were to be
wished that minds so paired for their own sakes should never be
separated 

see jack what i get by my charity 

i thanked her heartily but said that i must take the liberty to
observe that good folks were generally so uncharitable that devil take
me if i would choose to be good were the consequence to be that i must
think hardly of the whole world besides 

she congratulated me upon my charity but told me that to enlarge her
own she hoped it would not be expected of her to approve of the low
company i had brought her into last night 

no exception for thee belford safe is thy thousand pounds 

i saw not i said begging her pardon that she liked any body  plain
dealing for plain dealing jack why then did she abuse my friends  
however let me but know whom and what she did or did not like and if
possible i would like and dislike the very same persons and things 

she bid me then in a pet dislike myself 

cursed severe does she think she must not pay for it one day or one
night and if one many that's my comfort 

i was in such a train of being happy i said before my earnestness to
procure her to favour my friends with her company that i wished the
devil had had as well my friends as miss partington and yet i must say 
that i saw not how good people could answer half their end which is to
reform the wicked by precept as well as example were they to accompany
only with the good 

i had the like to have been blasted by two or three flashes of lightning
from her indignant eyes and she turned scornfully from me and retired
to her own apartment 

once more jack safe as thou seest is thy thousand pounds 

she says i am not a polite man but is she in the instance before us 
more polite for a woman 

and now dost thou not think that i owe my charmer some revenge for her
cruelty in obliging such a fine young creature and so vast a fortune as
miss partington to crowd into a press-bed with dorcas the maid-servant
of the proud refuser miss partington too with tears declared by mrs 
sinclair that would mrs lovelace do her the honour of a visit at
barnet the best bed and best room in her guardian's house should be at
her service thinkest thou that i could not guess at her dishonourable
fears of me that she apprehended that the supposed husband would
endeavour to take possession of his own and that miss partington would
be willing to contribute to such a piece of justice 

thus then thou both remindest and defiest me charmer and since thou
reliest more on thy own precaution than upon my honour be it unto thee 
fair one as thou apprehendest 

and now jack let me know what thy opinion and the opinions of thy
brother varlets are of my gloriana 

i have just now heard that hannah hopes to be soon well enough to attend
her young lady when in london it seems the girl has had no physician 
i must send her one out of pure love and respect to her mistress who
knows but medicine may weaken nature and strengthen the disease as her
malady is not a fever very likely it may do so but perhaps the wench's
hopes are too forward blustering weather in this month yet and that
is bad for rheumatic complaints 



letter xiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday may 2 


just as i had sealed up the enclosed comes a letter to my beloved in a
cover to me directed to lord m s from whom thinkest thou from mrs 
howe 

and what the contents 

how should i know unless the dear creature had communicated them to me 
but a very cruel letter i believe it is by the effect it had upon her 
the tears ran down her cheeks as she read it and her colour changed
several times no end of her persecutions i think 

what a cruelty in my fate  said the sweet lamenter now the only
comfort of my life must be given up 

miss howe's correspondence no doubt 

but should she be so much grieved at this this correspondence was
prohibited before and that to the daughter in the strongest terms 
but yet carried on by both although a brace of impeccables an't please
ye could they expect that a mother would not vindicate her authority 
 and finding her prohibition ineffectual with her perverse daughter was
it not reasonable to suppose she would try what effect it would have upon
her daughter's friend and now i believe the end will be effectually
answered for my beloved i dare say will make a point of conscience of
it 

i hate cruelty especially in women and should have been more concerned
for this instance of it in mrs howe had i not had a stronger instance of
the same in my beloved to miss partington for how did she know since
she was so much afraid for herself whom dorcas might let in to that
innocent and less watchful young lady but nevertheless i must needs
own that i am not very sorry for this prohibition let it originally
come from the harlowes or from whom it will because i make no doubt 
that it is owing to miss howe in a great measure that my beloved is so
much upon her guard and thinks so hardly of me and who can tell as
characters here are so tender and some disguises so flimsy what
consequences might follow this undutiful correspondence i say 
therefore i am not sorry for it now will she not have any body to
compare notes with any body to alarm her and i may be saved the guilt
and disobligation of inspecting into a correspondence that has long made
me uneasy 

how every thing works for me why will this charming creature make such
contrivances necessary as will increase my trouble and my guilt too as
some will account it but why rather i should ask will she fight
against her stars 



letter xv

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
edgware tuesday night may 2 


without staying for the promised letter from you to inform us what the
lady says of us i write to tell you that we are all of one opinion with
regard to her which is that there is not of her age a finer woman in
the world as to her understanding as for her person she is at the age
of bloom and an admirable creature a perfect beauty but this poorer
praise a man who has been honoured with her conversation can hardly
descend to give and yet she was brought amongst us contrary to her will 

permit me dear lovelace to be a mean of saving this excellent creature
from the dangers she hourly runs from the most plotting heart in the
world in a former i pleaded your own family lord m s wishes
particularly and then i had not seen her but now i join her sake 
honour's sake motives of justice generosity gratitude and humanity 
which are all concerned in the preservation of so fine a woman thou
knowest not the anguish i should have had whence arising i cannot
devise had i not known before i set out this morning that the
incomparable creature had disappointed thee in thy cursed view of getting
her to admit the specious partington for a bed-fellow 

i have done nothing but talk of this lady ever since i saw her there is
something so awful and yet so sweet in her aspect that were i to have
the virtues and the graces all drawn in one piece they should be taken 
every one of them from different airs and attributes in her she was
born to adorn the age she was given to and would be an ornament to the
first dignity what a piercing yet gentle eye every glance i thought
mingled with love and fear of you what a sweet smile darting through
the cloud that overspread her fair face demonstrating that she had more
apprehensions and grief at her heart than she cared to express 

you may think what i am going to write too flighty but by my faith i
have conceived such a profound reverence for her sense and judgment 
that far from thinking the man excusable who should treat her basely 
i am ready to regret that such an angel of a woman should even marry 
she is in my eye all mind and were she to meet with a man all mind
likewise why should the charming qualities she is mistress of be
endangered why should such an angel be plunged so low as into the
vulgar offices of a domestic life were she mine i should hardly wish
to see her a mother unless there were a kind of moral certainty that
minds like hers could be propagated for why in short should not the
work of bodies be left to mere bodies i know that you yourself have
an opinion of her little less exalted belton mowbray tourville are
all of my mind are full of her praises and swear it would be a million
of pities to ruin a woman in whose fall none but devils can rejoice 

what must that merit and excellence be which can extort this from us 
freelivers like yourself and all of your just resentments against the
rest of her family and offered our assistance to execute your vengeance
on them but we cannot think it reasonable that you should punish an
innocent creature who loves you so well and who is in your protection and
has suffered so much for you for the faults of her relations 

and here let me put a serious question or two thinkest thou truly
admirable as this lady is that the end thou proposest to thyself if
obtained is answerable to the means to the trouble thou givest thyself 
and to the perfidies tricks stratagems and contrivances thou has
already been guilty of and still meditatest in every real excellence
she surpasses all her sex but in the article thou seekest to subdue her
for a mere sensualist a partington a horton a martin would make a
sensualist a thousand times happier than she either will or can 

 sweet are the joys that come with willingness 

and wouldst thou make her unhappy for her whole life and thyself not
happy for a single moment 

hitherto it is not too late and that perhaps is as much as can be said 
if thou meanest to preserve her esteem and good opinion as well as
person for i think it is impossible she can get out of thy hands now she
is in this accursed house o that damned hypocritical sinclair as thou
callest her how was it possible she should behave so speciously as she
did all the time the lady staid with us be honest and marry and be
thankful that she will condescend to have thee if thou dost not thou
wilt be the worst of men and wilt be condemned in this world and the
next as i am sure thou oughtest and shouldest too wert thou to be
judged by one who never before was so much touched in a woman's favour 
and whom thou knowest to be

thy partial friend 
j belford 


our companions consented that i should withdraw to write to the above
effect they can make nothing of the characters we write in and so i
read this to them they approve of it and of their own motion each man
would set his name to it i would not delay sending it for fear of some
detestable scheme taking place 
 thomas belton 
 richard mowbray 
 james tourville 

just now are brought me both yours i vary not my opinion nor forbear
my earnest prayers to you in her behalf notwithstanding her dislike of
me 



letter xvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wednesday may 3 


when i have already taken pains to acquaint thee in full with regard to
my views designs and resolutions with regard to this admirable woman 
it is very extraordinary that thou shouldst vapour as thou dost in her
behalf when i have made no trial no attempt and yet givest it as thy
opinion in a former letter that advantage may be taken of the situation
she is in and that she may be overcome 

most of thy reflections particularly that which respects the difference
as to the joys to be given by the virtuous and libertine of her sex are
fitter to come in as after-reflections than as antecedencies 

i own with thee and with the poet that sweet are the joys that come
with willingness but is it to be expected that a woman of education 
and a lover of forms will yield before she is attacked and have i so
much as summoned this to surrender i doubt not but i shall meet with
difficulty i must therefore make my first effort by surprise there
may possibly be some cruelty necessary but there may be consent in
struggle there may be yielding in resistance but the first conflict
over whether the following may not be weaker and weaker till
willingness ensue is the point to be tried i will illustrate what i
have said by the simile of a bird new caught we begin when boys with
birds and when grown up go on to women and both perhaps in turn 
experience our sportive cruelty 

hast thou not observed the charming gradations by which the ensnared
volatile has been brought to bear with its new condition how at first 
refusing all sustenance it beats and bruises itself against its wires 
till it makes its gay plumage fly about and over-spread its well-secured
cage now it gets out its head sticking only at its beautiful
shoulders then with difficulty drawing back its head it gasps for
breath and erectly perched with meditating eyes first surveys and
then attempts its wired canopy as it gets its pretty head and sides 
bites the wires and pecks at the fingers of its delighted tamer till
at last finding its efforts ineffectual quite tired and breathless it
lays itself down and pants at the bottom of the cage seeming to bemoan
its cruel fate and forfeited liberty and after a few days its
struggles to escape still diminishing as it finds it to no purpose to
attempt it its new habitation becomes familiar and it hops about from
perch to perch resumes its wonted cheerfulness and every day sings a
song to amuse itself and reward its keeper 

now let me tell thee that i have known a bird actually starve itself and
die with grief at its being caught and caged but never did i meet with
a woman who was so silly yet have i heard the dear souls most
vehemently threaten their own lives on such an occasion but it is
saying nothing in a woman's favour if we do not allow her to have more
sense than a bird and yet we must all own that it is more difficult to
catch a bird than a lady 

to pursue the comparison if the disappointment of the captivated lady be
very great she will threaten indeed as i said she will even refuse
her sustenance for some time especially if you entreat her much and she
thinks she gives you concern by her refusal but then the stomach of the
dear sullen one will soon return tis pretty to see how she comes to by
degrees pressed by appetite she will first steal perhaps a weeping
morsel by herself then be brought to piddle and sigh and sigh and
piddle before you now-and-then if her viands be unsavoury swallowing
with them a relishing tear or two then she comes to eat and drink to
oblige you then resolves to live for your sake her exclamations will 
in the next place be turned into blandishments her vehement upbraidings
into gentle murmuring how dare you traitor into how could you 
dearest she will draw you to her instead of pushing you from her no
longer with unsheathed claws will she resist you but like a pretty 
playful wanton kitten with gentle paws and concealed talons tap your
cheek and with intermingled smiles and tears and caresses implore
your consideration for her and your constancy all the favour she then
has to ask of you and this is the time were it given to man to confine
himself to one object to be happier every day than another 

now belford were i to go no farther than i have gone with my beloved
miss harlowe how shall i know the difference between her and another
bird to let her fly now what a pretty jest would that be how do i
know except i try whether she may not be brought to sing me a fine
song and to be as well contented as i have brought other birds to be 
and very shy ones too 

but now let us reflect a little upon the confounded partiality of us
human creatures i can give two or three familiar and if they were not
familiar they would be shocking instances of the cruelty both of men
and women with respect to other creatures perhaps as worthy as at
least more innocent than themselves by my soul jack there is more of
the savage on human nature than we are commonly aware of nor is it 
after all so much amiss that we sometimes avenge the more innocent
animals upon our own species 

to particulars 

how usual a thing is it for women as well as men without the least
remorse to ensnare to cage and torment and even with burning
knitting-needles to put out the eyes of the poor feather'd songster  thou
seest i have not yet done with birds  which however in proportion to
its bulk has more life than themselves for a bird is all soul and of
consequence has as much feeling as the human creature when at the same
time if an honest fellow by the gentlest persuasion and the softest
arts has the good luck to prevail upon a mew'd-up lady to countenance
her own escape and she consents to break cage and be set a flying into
the all-cheering air of liberty mercy on us what an outcry is generally
raised against him 

just like what you and i once saw raised in a paltry village near
chelmsford after a poor hungry fox who watching his opportunity had
seized by the neck and shouldered a sleek-feathered goose at what time
we beheld the whole vicinage of boys and girls old men and old women 
all the furrows and wrinkles of the latter filled up with malice for the
time the old men armed with prongs pitch-forks clubs and catsticks 
the old women with mops brooms fire-shovels tongs and pokers and the
younger fry with dirt stones and brickbats gathering as they ran like
a snowball in pursuit of the wind-outstripping prowler all the mongrel
curs of the circumjacencies yelp yelp yelp at their heels completing
the horrid chorus 

rememebrest thou not this scene surely thou must my imagination 
inflamed by a tender sympathy for the danger of the adventurous marauder 
represents it to my eye as if it were but yesterday and dost thou not
recollect how generously glad we were as if our own case that honest
reynard by the help of a lucky stile over which both old and young
tumbled upon one another and a winding course escaped their brutal
fury and flying catsticks and how in fancy we followed him to his
undiscovered retreat and imagined we beheld the intrepid thief enjoying
his dear-earned purchase with a delight proportioned to his past danger 

i once made a charming little savage severely repent the delight she took
in seeing her tabby favourite make cruel sport with a pretty sleek bead-
eyed mouse before she devoured it egad my love said i to myself as
i sat meditating the scene i am determined to lie in wait for a fit
opportunity to try how thou wilt like to be tost over my head and be
caught again how thou wilt like to be parted from me and pulled to me 
yet will i rather give life than take it away as this barbarous
quadruped has at last done by her prey and after all was over between
my girl and me i reminded her of the incident to which my resolution was
owing 

nor had i at another time any mercy upon the daughter of an old epicure 
who had taught the girl without the least remorse to roast lobsters
alive to cause a poor pig to be whipt to death to scrape carp the
contrary way of the scales making them leap in the stew-pan and
dressing them in their own blood for sauce and this for luxury-sake 
and to provoke an appetite which i had without stimulation in my way 
and that i can tell thee a very ravenous one 

many more instances of the like nature could i give were i to leave
nothing to thyself to shew that the best take the same liberties and
perhaps worse with some sort of creatures that we take with others all
creatures still and creatures too as i have observed above replete
with strong life and sensible feeling if therefore people pretend to
mercy let mercy go through all their actions i have heard somewhere 
that a merciful man is merciful to his beast 

so much at present for those parts of thy letter in which thou urgest to
me motives of compassion for the lady 

but i guess at thy principal motive in this thy earnestness in behalf of
this charming creature i know that thou correspondest with lord m who
is impatient and has long been desirous to see me shackled and thou
wantest to make a merit with the uncle with a view to one of his nieces 
but knowest thou not that my consent will be wanting to complete thy
wishes and what a commendation will it be of thee to such a girl as
charlotte when i shall acquaint her with the affront thou puttest upon
the whole sex by asking whether i think my reward when i have subdued
the most charming woman in the world will be equal to my trouble 
which thinkest thou will a woman of spirit soonest forgive the
undervaluing varlet who can put such a question or him who prefers the
pursuit and conquest of a fine woman to all the joys of life have i not
known even a virtuous woman as she would be thought vow everlasting
antipathy to a man who gave out that she was too old for him to attempt 
and did not essex's personal reflection on queen elizabeth that she was
old and crooked contribute more to his ruin than his treason 

but another word or two as to thy objection relating to my trouble and
reward 

does not the keen fox-hunter endanger his neck and his bones in pursuit
of a vermin which when killed is neither fit food for men nor dogs 

do not the hunters of the noble game value the venison less than the
sport 

why then should i be reflected upon and the sex affronted for my
patience and perseverance in the most noble of all chases and for not
being a poacher in love as thy question be made to imply 

learn of thy master for the future to treat more respectfully a sex
that yields us our principal diversions and delights 

proceed anon 



letter xvii

mr lovelace
 in continuation  


well sayest thou that mine is the most plotting heart in the world 
thou dost me honour and i thank thee heartily thou art no bad judge 
how like boileau's parson i strut behind my double chin am i not
obliged to deserve thy compliment and wouldst thou have me repent of a
murder before i have committed it 

the virtues and graces are this lady's handmaids she was certainly
born to adorn the age she was given to  well said jack and would be
an ornament to the first dignity  but what praise is that unless the
first dignity were adorned with the first merit dignity gew-gaw 
first dignity thou idiot art thou who knowest me so taken with
ermine and tinsel i who have won the gold am only fit to wear it 
for the future therefore correct thy style and proclaim her the ornament
of the happiest man and respecting herself and sex the greatest
conqueror in the world 

then that she loves me as thou imaginest by no means appears clear to
me her conditional offers to renounce me the little confidence she
places in me entitle me to ask what merit can she have with a man who
won her in spite of herself and who fairly in set and obstinate battle 
took her prisoner 

as to what thou inferrest from her eye when with us thou knowest nothing
of her heart from that if thou imaginest there was one glance of love
shot from it well did i note her eye and plainly did i see that it
was all but just civil disgust to me and to the company i had brought her
into her early retiring that night against all entreaty might have
convinced thee that there was very little of the gentle in her heart for
me and her eye never knew what it was to contradict her heart 

she is thou sayest all mind so say i but why shouldst thou imagine
that such a mind as hers meeting with such a one as mine and to dwell
upon the word meeting with an inclination in hers should not propagate
minds like her own 

were i to take thy stupid advice and marry what a figure should i make
in rakish annals the lady in my power yet not have intended to put
herself in my power declaring against love and a rebel to it so much
open-eyed caution no confidence in my honour her family expecting the
worst hath passed herself seeming to expect that the worst will be
attempted  priscilla partington for that   what wouldst thou not have
me act in character 

but why callest thou the lady innocent and why sayest thou she loves
me 

by innocent with regard to me and not taken as a general character i
must insist upon it she is not innocent can she be innocent who by
wishing to shackle me in the prime and glory of my youth with such a
capacity as i have for noble mischief would make my perdition more
certain were i to break as i doubt i should the most solemn vow i
could make i say no man ought to take even a common oath who thinks he
cannot keep it this is conscience this is honour and when i think i
can keep the marriage-vow then will it be time to marry 


 see vol iii letter xxiii paragr 4 


no doubt of it as thou sayest the devils would rejoice in the fall of
such a woman but this is my confidence that i shall have it in my
power to marry when i will and if i do her this justice shall i not
have a claim of her gratitude and will she not think herself the
obliged rather than the obliger then let me tell thee belford it is
impossible so far to hurt the morals of this lady as thou and thy
brother varlets have hurt others of the sex who now are casting about
the town firebrands and double death take ye that thistle to mumble
upon 


 


a short interruption i now resume 

that the morals of this lady cannot fail is a consideration that will
lessen the guilt on both sides and if when subdued she knows but how
to middle the matter between virtue and love then will she be a wife for
me for already i am convinced that there is not a woman in the world
that is love-proof and plot-proof if she be not the person 

and now imagine the charmer overcome thou seest me sitting supinely
cross-kneed reclining on my sofa the god of love dancing in my eyes 
and rejoicing in every mantling feature the sweet rogue late such a
proud rogue wholly in my power moving up slowly to me at my beck with
heaving sighs half-pronounced upbraidings from murmuring lips her
finger in her eye and quickening her pace at my come hither dearest 

one hand stuck in my side the other extended to encourage her bashful
approach kiss me love sweet as jack belford says are the joys that
come with willingness 

she tenders her purple mouth  her coral lips will be purple then jack   
sigh not so deeply my beloved happier hours await thy humble love 
than did thy proud resistance 

once more bent to my ardent lips the swanny glossiness of a neck late so
stately 

there's my precious 

again 

obliging loveliness 

o my ever-blooming glory i have tried thee enough to-morrow's sun 

then i rise and fold to my almost-talking heart the throbbing-bosom'd
charmer 

and now shall thy humble pride confess its obligation to me 

to-morrow's sun and then i disengage myself from the bashful passive 
and stalk about the room to-morrow's sun shall gild the altar at which
my vows shall be paid thee 

then jack the rapture then the darted sun-beams from her gladdened
eye drinking up at one sip the precious distillation from the pearl-
dropt cheek then hands ardently folded eyes seeming to pronounce god
bless my lovelace to supply the joy-locked tongue her transports too
strong and expression too weak to give utterance to her grateful
meanings all all the studies all the studies of her future life vowed
and devoted when she can speak to acknowledge and return the perpetual
obligation 

if i could bring my charmer to this would it not be the eligible of
eligibles is it not worth trying for as i said i can marry her when
i will she can be nobody's but mine neither for shame nor by choice 
nor yet by address for who that knows my character believes that the
worst she dreads is now to be dreaded 

i have the highest opinion that man can have thou knowest i have of the
merit and perfections of this admirable woman of her virtue and honour
too although thou in a former art of opinion that she may be
overcome am i not therefore obliged to go further in order to
contradict thee and as i have often urged to be sure that she is what
i really think her to be and if i am ever to marry her hope to find
her 


 see vol iii letter li paragr 9 


then this lady is a mistress of our passions no one ever had to so much
perfection the art of moving this all her family know and have equally
feared and revered her for it this i know too and doubt not more and
more to experience how charmingly must this divine creature warble
forth if a proper occasion be given her melodious elegiacs infinite
beauties are there in a weeping eye i first taught the two nymphs below
to distinguish the several accents of the lamentable in a new subject 
and how admirably some more than others become their distresses 

but to return to thy objections thou wilt perhaps tell me in the names
of thy brethren as well as in thy own name that among all the objects
of your respective attempts there was not one of the rank and merit of
my charming miss harlowe 

but let me ask has it not been a constant maxim with us that the
greater the merit on the woman's side the nobler the victory on the
man's and as to rank sense of honour sense of shame pride of family 
may make rifled rank get up and shake itself to rights and if any thing
come of it such a one may suffer only in her pride by being obliged to
take up with a second-rate match instead of a first and as it may fall
out be the happier as well as the more useful for the misadventure 
since taken off of her public gaddings and domesticated by her
disgrace she will have reason to think herself obliged to the man who
has saved her from further reproach while her fortune and alliance will
lay an obligation upon him and her past fall if she have prudence and
consciousness will be his present and future security 

but a poor girl  such a one as my rosebud for instance  having no recalls
from education being driven out of every family that pretends to
reputation persecuted most perhaps by such as have only kept their
secret better and having no refuge to fly to the common the stews the
street is the fate of such a poor wretch penury want and disease her
sure attendants and an untimely end perhaps closes the miserable scene 

and will you not now all join to say that it is more manly to attach a
lion than a sheep thou knowest that i always illustrated my eagleship 
by aiming at the noblest quarries and by disdaining to make a stoop at
wrens phyl-tits and wag-tails 


 phyl-tits q d phyllis-tits in opposition to tom-tits it needs not
now be observed that mr lovelace in this wanton gaiety of his heart 
often takes liberties of coining words and phrases in his letters to this
his familiar friend see his ludicrous reason for it in vol iii letter
xxv paragr antepenult 

the worst respecting myself in the case before me is that my triumph 
when completed will be so glorious a one that i shall never be able to
keep up to it all my future attempts must be poor to this i shall be
as unhappy after a while from my reflections upon this conquest as don
juan of austria was in his on the renowned victory of lepanto when he
found that none of future achievements could keep pace with his early
glory 

i am sensible that my pleas and my reasoning may be easily answered and
perhaps justly censured but by whom censured not by any of the
confraternity whose constant course of life even long before i became
your general to this hour has justified what ye now in a fit of
squeamishness and through envy condemn having therefore vindicated
myself and my intentions to you that is all i am at present concerned
for 

be convinced then that i according to our principles am right thou
wrong or at least be silent but i command thee to be convinced and
in thy next be sure to tell me that thou art 



letter xviii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
edgeware thursday may 4 


i know that thou art so abandoned a man that to give thee the best
reasons in the world against what thou hast once resolved upon will be
but acting the madman whom once we saw trying to buffet down a hurricane
with his hat i hope however that the lady's merit will still avail her
with thee but if thou persistest if thou wilt avenge thyself on this
sweet lamb which thou hast singled out from a flock thou hatest for the
faults of the dogs who kept it if thou art not to be moved by beauty by
learning by prudence by innocence all shining out in one charming
object but she must fall fall by the man whom she has chosen for her
protector i would not for a thousand worlds have thy crime to answer
for 

upon my faith lovelace the subject sticks with me notwithstanding i
find i have not the honour of the lady's good opinion and the more when
i reflect upon her father's brutal curse and the villainous hard-
heartedness of all her family but nevertheless i should be desirous
to know if thou wilt proceed by what gradations arts and contrivances
thou effectest thy ingrateful purpose and o lovelace i conjure thee 
if thou art a man let not the specious devils thou has brought her among
be suffered to triumph over her yield to fair seductions if i may so
express myself if thou canst raise a weakness in her by love or by arts
not inhuman i shall the less pity her and shall then conclude that
there is not a woman in the world who can resist a bold and resolute
lover 

a messenger is just now arrived from my uncle the mortification it
seems is got to his knee and the surgeons declare that he cannot live
many days he therefore sends for me directly with these shocking
words that i will come and close his eyes my servant or his must of
necessity be in town every day on his case or other affairs and one of
them shall regularly attend you for any letter or commands it will be
charity to write to me as often as you can for although i am likely to
be a considerable gainer by the poor man's death yet i cannot say that i
at all love these scenes of death and the doctor so near me the doctor
and death i should have said for that is the natural order and
generally speaking the one is but the harbinger to the other 

if therefore you decline to oblige me i shall think you are displeased
with my freedom but let me tell you at the same that no man has a
right to be displeased at freedoms taken with him for faults he is not
ashamed to be guilty of 

j belford 



letter xix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


i thank you and mr hickman for his letter sent me with such kind
expedition and proceed to obey my dear menacing tyranness 


 she then gives the particulars of what passed between herself and mr 
 lovelace on tuesday morning in relation to his four friends and to
 miss partington pretty much to the same effect as in mr lovelace's
 letter no xiii and then proceeds  

he is constantly accusing me of over-scrupulousness he says i am
always out of humour with him that i could not have behaved more
reservedly to mr solmes and that it is contrary to all his hopes and
notions that he should not in so long a time find himself able to
inspire the person whom he hoped so soon to have the honour to call his 
with the least distinguishing tenderness for him before-hand 

silly and partial encroacher not to know to what to attribute the
reserve i am forced to treat him with but his pride has eaten up his
prudence it is indeed a dirty low pride that has swallowed up the true
pride which should have set him above the vanity that has overrun him 

yet he pretends that he has no pride but in obliging me and is always
talking of his reverence and humility and such sort of stuff but of
this i am sure that he has as i observed the first time i saw him too
much regard to his own person greatly to value that of his wife marry
he whom he will and i must be blind if i did not see that he is
exceedingly vain of his external advantages and of that address which 
if it has any merit in it to an outward eye is perhaps owing more to his
confidence that  sic  to any thing else 


 see vol i letter iii 


have you not beheld the man when i was your happy guest as he walked to
his chariot looking about him as if to observe what eyes his specious
person and air had attracted 

but indeed we had some homely coxcombs as proud as if they had persons to
be proud of at the same time that it was apparent that the pains they
took about themselves but the more exposed their defects 

the man who is fond of being thought more or better than he is as i have
often observed but provokes a scrutiny into his pretensions and that
generally produces contempt for pride as i believe i have heretofore
said is an infallible sign of weakness of something wrong in the head
or in both he that exalts himself insults his neighbour who is
provoked to question in him even that merit which were he modest would
perhaps be allowed to be his due 

you will say that i am very grave and so i am mr lovelace is
extremely sunk in my opinion since monday night nor see i before me any
thing that can afford me a pleasing hope for what with a mind so
unequal as his can be my best hope 

i think i mentioned to you in my former that my clothes were brought
me you fluttered me so that i am not sure i did but i know i
designed to mention that they were they were brought me on thursday 
but neither my few guineas with them nor any of my books except a
drexelius on eternity the good old practice of piety and a francis
spira my brother's wit i suppose he thinks he does well to point out
death and despair to me i wish for the one and every now-and-then am
on the brink of the other 

you will the less wonder at my being so very solemn when added to the
above and to my uncertain situation i tell you that they have sent me
with these books a letter form my cousin morden it has set my heart
against mr lovelace against myself too i send it enclosed if you
please my dear you may read it here 


col morden to miss clarissa harlowe

florence april 13 

i am extremely concerned to hear of a difference betwixt the rest of a
family so near and dear to me and you still dearer to than any of the
rest 

my cousin james has acquainted me with the offers you have had and with
your refusals i wonder not at either such charming promises at so
early an age as when i left england and those promises as i have often
heard so greatly exceeded as well in your person as mind how much must
you be admired how few must there be worthy of you 

your parents the most indulgent in the world to a child the most
deserving have given way it seems to your refusal of several gentlemen 
they have contented themselves at last to name one with earnestness to
you because of the address of another whom they cannot approve 

they had not reason it seems from your behaviour to think you greatly
averse so they proceeded perhaps too hastily for a delicacy like
your's but when all was fixed on their parts and most extraordinary
terms concluded in your favour terms which abundantly show the
gentleman's just value for you you flew off with a warmth and vehemence
little suited to that sweetness which gave grace to all your actions 

i know very little of either of the gentlemen but of mr lovelace i know
more than of mr solmes i wish i could say more to his advantage than i
can as to every qualification but one your brother owns there is no
comparison but that one outweighs all the rest together it cannot be
thought that miss clarissa harlowe will dispense with morals in a
husband 

what my dearest cousin shall i plead first to you on this occasion 
your duty your interest your temporal and your eternal welfare do and
may all depend upon this single point the morality of a husband a
woman who hath a wicked husband may find it difficult to be good and out
of her power to do good and is therefore in a worse situation than the
man can be in who hath a bad wife you preserve all your religious
regards i understand i wonder not that you do i should have wondered
had you not but what can you promise youself as to perseverance in
them with an immoral husband 

if your parents and you differ in sentiment on this important occasion 
let me ask you my dear cousin who ought to give way i own to you 
that i should have thought there could not any where have been a more
suitable match for you than mr lovelace had he been a moral man i
should have very little to say against a man of whose actions i am not
to set up myself as a judge did he not address my cousin but on this
occasion let me tell you my dear clarissa that mr lovelace cannot
possibly deserve you he may reform you'll say but he may not habit
is not soon or easily shaken off libertines who are libertines in
defiance of talents of superior lights of conviction hardly ever
reform but by miracle or by incapacity well do i know mine own sex 
well am i able to judge of the probability of the reformation of a
licentious young man who has not been fastened upon by sickness by
affliction by calamity who has a prosperous run of fortune before him 
his spirits high his will uncontroulable the company he keeps perhaps
such as himself confirming him in all his courses assisting him in
all his enterprises 

as to the other gentleman suppose my dear cousin you do not like him
at present it is far from being unlikely that you will hereafter 
perhaps the more for not liking him now he can hardly sink lower in
your opinion he may rise very seldom is it that high expectations are
so much as tolerably answered how indeed can they when a fine and
extensive imagination carries its expectation infinitely beyond reality 
in the highest of our sublunary enjoyments a woman adorned with such an
imagination sees no defect in a favoured object the less if she be not
conscious of any wilful fault in herself till it is too late to rectify
the mistakes occasioned by her generous credulity 

but suppose a person of your talents were to marry a man of inferior
talents who in this case can be so happy in herself as miss clarissa
harlowe what delight do you take in doing good how happily do you
devote the several portions of the day to your own improvement and to
the advantage of all that move within your sphere and then such is
your taste such are your acquirements in the politer studies and in the
politer amusements such your excellence in all the different parts of
economy fit for a young lady's inspection and practice that your friends
would wish you to be taken off as little as possible by regards that may
be called merely personal 

but as to what may be the consequence respecting yourself respecting a
young lady of your talents from the preference you are suspected to give
to a libertine i would have you my dear cousin consider what that may
be a mind so pure to mingle with a mind impure and will not such a
man as this engross all your solitudes will he not perpetually fill you
with anxieties for him and for yourself the divine and civil powers
defied and their sanctions broken through by him on every not merely
accidental but meditated occasion to be agreeable to him and to hope
to preserve an interest in his affections you must probably be obliged
to abandon all your own laudable pursuits you must enter into his
pleasures and distastes you must give up your virtuous companions for
his profligate ones perhaps be forsaken by your's because of the
scandal he daily gives can you hope cousin with such a man as this to
be long so good as you now are if not consider which of your present
laudable delights you would choose to give up which of his culpable ones
to follow him in how could you brook to go backward instead of
forward in those duties which you now so exemplarily perform and how do
you know if you once give way where you shall be suffered where you
shall be able to stop 

your brother acknowledges that mr solmes is not near so agreeable in
person as mr lovelace but what is person with such a lady as i have
the honour to be now writing to he owns likewise that he has not the
address of mr lovelace but what a mere personal advantage is a
plausible address without morals a woman had better take a husband
whose manners she were to fashion than to find them ready-fashioned to
her hand at the price of her morality a price that is often paid for
travelling accomplishments o my dear cousin were you but with us here
at florence or at rome or at paris where also i resided for many
months to see the gentlemen whose supposed rough english manners at
setting out are to be polished and what their improvement are in their
return through the same places you would infinitely prefer the man in
his first stage to the same man in his last you find the difference on
their return a fondness for foreign fashions an attachment to foreign
vices a supercilious contempt of his own country and countrymen 
 himself more despicable than the most despicable of those he despises 
these with an unblushing effrontery are too generally the attainments
that concur to finish the travelled gentleman 

mr lovelace i know deserves to have an exception made in his favour 
for he really is a man of parts and learning he was esteemed so both
here and at rome and a fine person and a generous turn of mind gave
him great advantages but you need not be told that a libertine man of
sense does infinitely more mischief than a libertine of weak parts is
able to do and this i will tell you further that it was mr lovelace's
own fault that he was not still more respected than he was among the
literati here there were in short some liberties in which he
indulged himself that endangered his person and his liberty and made
the best and most worthy of those who honoured him with their notice
give him up and his stay both at florence and at rome shorter than he
designed 

this is all i choose to say of mr lovelace i had much rather have had
reason to give him a quite contrary character but as to rakes or
libertines in general i who know them well must be allowed because of
the mischiefs they have always in their hearts and too often in their
power to do your sex to add still a few more words upon this topic 

a libertine my dear cousin a plotting an intriguing libertine must be
generally remorseless unjust he must always be the noble rule of doing
to others what he would have done to himself is the first rule he breaks 
and every day he breaks it the oftener the greater his triumph he has
great contempt for your sex he believes no woman chaste because he is
a profligate every woman who favours him confirms him in his wicked
incredulity he is always plotting to extend the mischiefs he delights
in if a woman loves such a man how can she bear the thought of
dividing her interest in his affections with half the town and that
perhaps the dregs of it then so sensual how will a young lady of your
delicacy bear with so sensual a man a man who makes a jest of his vows 
and who perhaps will break your spirit by the most unmanly insults to
be a libertine is to continue to be every thing vile and inhuman 
prayers tears and the most abject submission are but fuel to his
pride wagering perhaps with lewd companions and not improbably with
lewder women upon instances which he boasts of to them of your patient
sufferings and broken spirit and bringing them home to witness to both 

i write what i know has been 

i mention not fortunes squandered estates mortgaged or sold and
posterity robbed nor yet a multitude of other evils too gross too
shocking to be mentioned to a person of your delicacy 

all these my dear cousin to be shunned all the evils i have named to
be avoided the power of doing all the good you have been accustomed to 
preserved nay increased by the separate provision that will be made
for you your charming diversions and exemplary employments all
maintained and every good habit perpetuated and all by one sacrifice 
the fading pleasure of the eye who would not since every thing is not
to be met with in one man who would not to preserve so many
essentials give up to light so unpermanent a pleasure 

weigh all these things which i might insist upon to more advantage did
i think it needful to one of your prudence weigh them well my beloved
cousin and if it be not the will of your parents that you should
continue single resolve to oblige them and let it not be said that the
powers of fancy shall as in many others of your sex be too hard for
your duty and your prudence the less agreeable the man the more
obliging the compliance remember that he is a sober man a man who has
reputation to lose and whose reputation therefore is a security for his
good behaviour to you 

you have an opportunity offered you to give the highest instance that can
be given of filial duty embrace it it is worthy of you it is
expected from you however for your inclination-sake we may be sorry
that you are called upon to give it let it be said that you have been
able to lay an obligation upon your parents a proud word my cousin 
which you could not do were it not laid against your inclination upon
parents who have laid a thousand upon you who are set upon this point 
who will not give it up who have given up many points to you even of
this very nature and in their turn for the sake of their own authority 
as well as judgment expect to be obliged 

i hope i shall soon in person congratulate you upon this your
meritorious compliance to settle and give up my trusteeship is one of
the principal motives of my leaving these parts i shall be glad to
settle it to every one's satisfaction to yours particularly 

if on my arrival i find a happy union as formerly reign in a family so
dear to me it will be an unspeakable pleasure to me and i shall perhaps
so dispose my affairs as to be near you for ever 

i have written a very long letter and will add no more than that i am 
with the greatest respect my dearest cousin 

your most affectionate and faithful servant 
wm morden 


 


i will suppose my dear miss howe that you have read my cousin's letter 
it is now in vain to wish it had come sooner but if it had i might
perhaps have been so rash as to give mr lovelace the fatal meeting as i
little thought of going away with him 

but i should hardly have given him the expectation of so doing previous
to the meeting which made him come prepared and the revocation of which
he so artfully made ineffectual 

persecuted as i was and little expecting so much condescension as my
aunt to my great mortification has told me and you confirm i should
have met with it is however hard to say what i should or should not
have done as to meeting him had it come in time but this effect i
verily believe it would have had to have made me insist with all my
might on going over out of all their ways to the kind writer of the
instructive letter and on making a father a protector as well as a
friend of a kinsman who is one of my trustees this circumstanced as
i was would have been a natural at least an unexceptionable protection 
 but i was to be unhappy and how it cuts me to the heart to think that
i can already subscribe to my cousin's character of a libertine so well
drawn in the letter which i suppose you now to have read 

that a man of a character which ever was my abhorrence should fall to my
lot but depending on my own strength having no reason to apprehend
danger from headstrong and disgraceful impulses i too little perhaps
cast up my eyes to the supreme director in whom mistrusting myself i
ought to have placed my whole confidence and the more when i saw myself
so perserveringly addressed by a man of this character 

inexperience and presumption with the help of a brother and sister who
have low ends to answer in my disgrace have been my ruin a hard word 
my dear but i repeat it upon deliberation since let the best happen
which now can happen my reputation is destroyed a rake is my portion 
and what that portion is my cousin morden's letter has acquainted you 

pray keep it by you till called for i saw it not myself having not the
heart to inspect my trunks till this morning i would not for the world
this man should see it because it might occasion mischief between the
most violent spirit and the most settled brave one in the world as my
cousin's is said to be 

this letter was enclosed opened in a blank cover scorn and detest me
as they will i wonder that one line was not sent with it were it but to
have more particularly pointed the design of it in the same generous
spirit that sent me the spira 

the sealing of the cover was with black wax i hope there is no new
occasion in the family to give reason for black wax but if there were 
it would to be sure have been mentioned and laid at my door perhaps
too justly 

i had begun a letter to my cousin but laid it by because of the
uncertainty of my situation and expecting every day for several days
past to be at a greater certainty you bid me write to him some time
ago you know then it was i began it for i have great pleasure in
obeying you in all i may so i ought to have for you are the only
friend left me and moreover you generally honour me with your own
observance of the advice i take the liberty to offer you for i pretend
to say i give better advice than i have taken and so i had need for 
i know not how it comes about but i am in my own opinion a poor lost
creature and yet cannot charge myself with one criminal or faulty
inclination do you know my dear how this can be 

yet i can tell you how i believe one devious step at setting out 
that must be it which pursued has led me so far out of my path that i
am in a wilderness of doubt and error and never never shall find my
way out of it for although but one pace awry at first it has led me
hundreds and hundreds of miles out of my path and the poor estray has
not one kind friend nor has met with one direct passenger to help her
to recover it 

but i presumptuous creature must rely so much upon my own knowledge of
the right path little apprehending that an ignus fatuus with its false
fires and ye i had heard enough of such would arise to mislead me and
now in the midst of fens and quagmires it plays around me and around
me throwing me back again whenever i think myself in the right track 
but there is one common point in which all shall meet err widely as
they may in that i shall be laid quietly down at last and then will
all my calamities be at an end 

but how i stray again stray from my intention i would only have said 
that i had begun a letter to my cousin morden some time ago but that now
i can never end it you will believe i cannot for how shall i tell him
that all his compliments are misbestowed that all his advice is thrown
away all his warnings vain and that even my highest expectation is to
be the wife of that free-liver whom he so pathetically warns me to shun 

let me own however have your prayers joined with my own my fate
depending as it seems upon the lips of such a man that whatever
shall be my destiny that dreadful part of my father's malediction that
i may be punished by the man in whom he supposes i put my confidence may
not take place that this for mr lovelace's own sake and for the sake
of human nature may not be or if it be necessary in support of the
parental authority that i should be punished by him that it may not be
by his premeditated or wilful baseness but that i may be able to acquit
his intention if not his action  otherwise my fault will appear to be
doubled in the eye of the event-judging world and yet methinks i
would be glad that the unkindness of my father and uncles whose hearts
have already been too much wounded by my error may be justified in every
article excepting in this heavy curse and that my father will be
pleased to withdraw that before it be generally known at least the most
dreadful part of it which regards futurity 

i must lay down my pen i must brood over these reflections once more 
before i close my cousin's letter i will peruse it and then i shall
have it by heart 



letter xx

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
sunday night may 7 


when you reflect upon my unhappy situation which is attended with so
many indelicate and even shocking circumstances some of which my pride
will not let me think of with patience all aggravated by the contents of
my cousin's affecting letter you will not wonder that the vapourishness
which has laid hold of my heart should rise to my pen and yet it would
be more kind more friendly in me to conceal from you who take such a
generous interest in my concerns that worst part of my griefs which
communication and complaint cannot relieve 

but to whom can i unbosom myself but to you when the man who ought to be
my protector as he has brought upon me all my distresses adds to my
apprehensions when i have not even a servant on whose fidelity i can
rely or to whom i can break my griefs as they arise and when his
bountiful temper and gay heart attach every one to him and i am but a
cipher to give him significance and myself pain these griefs 
therefore do what i can will sometimes burst into tears and these
mingling with my ink will blot my paper and i know you will not grudge
me the temporary relief 

but i shall go on in the strain i left off with in my last when i
intended rather to apologize for my melancholy but let what i have
above written once for all be my apology my misfortunes have given
you a call to discharge the noblest offices of the friendship we have
vowed to each other in advice and consolation and it would be an injury
to it and to you to suppose it needed even that call 


 she then tells miss howe that now her clothes are come mr lovelace is
 continually teasing her to go abroad with him in a coach attended by
 whom she pleases of her own sex either for the air or to the public
 diversions 

she gives the particulars of a conversation that has passed between them
 on that subject and his several proposals but takes notice that he
 says not the least word of the solemnity which he so much pressed for
 before they came to town and which as she observes was necessary to
 give propriety to his proposals  

now my dear she says i cannot bear the life i live i would be glad
at my heart to be out of his reach if i were he should soon find the
difference if i must be humbled it had better be by those to whom i
owe duty than by him my aunt writes in her letter that she dare not
propose any thing in my favour you tell me that upon inquiry you
find that had i not been unhappily seduced away a change of measures
was actually resolved upon and that my mother particularly was
determined to exert herself for the restoration of the family peace and 
in order to succeed the better had thoughts of trying to engage my uncle
harlowe in her party 


 see vol iii letter lii 
 ibid letter viii 


let me build on these foundations i can but try my dear it is my
duty to try all probable methods to restore the poor outcast to favour 
and who knows but that once indulgent uncle who has very great weight in
the family may be induced to interpose in my behalf i will give up all
right and title to my grandfather's devises and bequests with all my
heart and soul to whom they please in order to make my proposal
palatable to my brother and that my surrender may be effectual i will
engage never to marry 

what think you my dear of this expedient surely they cannot resolve
to renounce me for ever if they look with impartial eyes upon what has
happened they will have something to blame themselves for as well as
me 

i presume that you will be of opinion that this expedient is worth
trying but here is my difficulty if i should write my hard-hearted
brother has so strongly confederated them all against me that my letter
would be handed about from one to another till he had hardened every one
to refuse my request whereas could my uncle be engaged to espouse my
cause as from himself i should have some hope as i presume to think he
would soon have my mother and my aunt of his party 

what therefore i am thinking of is this suppose mr hickman whose
good character has gained him every body's respect should put himself in
my uncle harlowe's way and as if from your knowledge of the state of
things between mr lovelace and me assure him not only of the above
particulars but that i am under no obligations that shall hinder me from
taking his directions 

i submit the whole to your consideration whether to pursue it at all or
in what manner but if it be pursued and if my uncle refuses to
interest himself in my favour upon mr hickman's application as from you 
 for so for obvious reasons it must be put i can then have no hope 
and my next step in the mind i am in shall be to throw myself into the
protection of the ladies of his family 

it were an impiety to adopt the following lines because it would be
throwing upon the decrees of providence a fault too much my own but
often do i revolve them for the sake of the general similitude which
they bear to my unhappy yet undersigned error 

 to you great gods i make my last appeal 
 or clear my virtue or my crimes reveal 
 if wand'ring in the maze of life i run 
 and backward tread the steps i sought to shun 
 impute my error to your own decree 
 my feet are guilty but my heart is free 


 the lady dates again on monday to let miss howe know that mr 
 lovelace on observing her uneasiness had introduced to her mr 
 mennell mrs fretchville's kinsman who managed all her affairs she
 calls him a young officer of sense and politeness who gave her an
 account of the house and furniture to the same effect that mr 
 lovelace had done before as also of the melancholy way mrs 
 fretchville is in 


 see letter iv of this volume 


she tells miss howe how extremely urgent mr lovelace was with the
 gentleman to get his spouse as he now always calls her before
 company a sight of the house and that mr mennell undertook that
 very afternoon to show her all of it except the apartment mrs 
 fretchville should be in when she went but that she chose not to
 take another step till she knew how she approved of her scheme to have
 her uncle sounded and with what success if tried it would be
 attended 

mr lovelace in his humourous way gives his friend an account of the
 lady's peevishness and dejection on receiving a letter with her
 clothes he regrets that he has lost her confidence which he
 attributes to his bringing her into the company of his four
 companions yet he thinks he must excuse them and censure her for
 over-niceness for that he never saw men behave better at least not
 them 

mentioning his introducing mr mennell to her  

now jack says he was it not very kind of mr mennell  captain mennell
i sometimes called him for among the military there is no such officer 
thou knowest as a lieutenant or an ensign was it not very kind in him 
to come along with me so readily as he did to satisfy my beloved about
the vapourish lady and the house 

but who is capt mennell methinks thou askest i never heard of such a
man as captain mennell 

very likely but knowest thou not young newcomb honest doleman's
newphew 

o-ho is it he 

it is and i have changed his name by virtue of my own single authority 
knowest thou not that i am a great name-father preferment i bestow 
both military and civil i give estates and take them away at my
pleasure quality too i create and by a still more valuable
prerogative i degrade by virtue of my own imperial will without any
other act of forfeiture than my own convenience what a poor thing is a
monarch to me 

but mennell now he has seen this angel of a woman has qualms that's
the devil i shall have enough to do to keep him right but it is the
less wonder that he should stagger when a few hours' conversation with
the same lady could make four much more hardened varlets find hearts 
only that i am confident that i shall at least reward her virtue if
her virtue overcome me or i should find it impossible to persevere for
at times i have confounded qualms myself but say not a word of them to
the confraternity nor laugh at me for them thyself 


in another letter dated monday night he writes as follows 

this perverse lady keeps me at such a distance that i am sure something
is going on between her and miss howe notwithstanding the prohibition
from mrs howe to both and as i have thought it some degree of merit in
myself to punish others for their transgressions i am of opinion that
both these girls are punishable for their breach of parental injunctions 
and as to their letter-carrier i have been inquiring into his way of
living and finding him to be a common poacher a deer-stealer and
warren-robber who under pretence of haggling deals with a set of
customers who constantly take all he brings whether fish fowl or
venison i hold myself justified since wilson's conveyance must at
present be sacred to have him stripped and robbed and what money he has
about him given to the poor since if i take not money as well as
letters i shall be suspected 

to serve one's self and punish a villain at the same time is serving
public and private the law was not made for such a man as me and i
must come at correspondences so disobediently carried on 

but on second thoughts if i could find out that the dear creature
carried any of her letters in her pockets i can get her to a play or to
a concert and she may have the misfortune to lose her pockets 

but how shall i find this out since her dorcas knows no more of her
dressing and undressing than her lovelace for she is dressed for the
day before she appears even to her servant vilely suspicious upon my
soul jack a suspicious temper is a punishable temper if a woman
suspects a rogue in an honest man is it not enough to make the honest
man who knows it a rogue 

but as to her pockets i think my mind hankers after them as the less
mischievous attempt but they cannot hold all the letters i should wish
to see and yet a woman's pockets are half as deep as she is high tied
round the sweet levities i presume as ballast-bags lest the wind as
they move with full sail from whale-ribbed canvass should blow away the
gypsies 


 he then in apprehension that something is meditating between the two
 ladies or that something may be set on foot to get miss harlowe out
 of his hands relates several of his contrivances and boasts of his
 instructions given in writing to dorcas and to his servant will 
 summers and says that he has provided against every possible
 accident even to bring her back if she should escape or in case she
 should go abroad and then refuse to return and hopes so to manage 
 as that should he make an attempt whether he succeeded in it or not 
 he may have a pretence to detain her  

he then proceeds as follows 

i have ordered dorcas to cultivate by all means her lady's favour to
lament her incapacity as to writing and reading to shew letters to her
lady as from pretended country relations to beg her advice how to
answer them and to get them answered and to be always aiming at
scrawling with a pen lest inky fingers should give suspicion i have
moreover given the wench an ivory-leafed pocket-book with a silver
pencil that she may make memoranda on occasion 

and let me tell thee that the lady has already at mrs sinclair's
motion removed her clothes out of the trunks they came in into an ample
mahogany repository where they will lie at full length and which has
drawers in it for linen a repository that used to hold the richest
suits which some of the nymphs put on when they are to be dressed out 
to captivate or to ape quality for many a countess thou knowest has
our mother equipped nay two or three duchesses who live upon quality-
terms with their lords but this to such as will come up to her price 
and can make an appearance like quality themselves on the occasion for
the reputation of persons of birth must not lie at the mercy of every
under-degreed sinner 

a master-key which will open every lock in this chest is put into
dorcas's hands and she is to take care when she searches for papers 
before she removes any thing to observe how it lies that she may
replace all to a hair sally and polly can occasionally help to
transcribe slow and sure with such an argus-eyed charmer must be all
my movements 

it is impossible that one so young and so inexperienced as she is can
have all her caution from herself the behaviour of the women so
unexceptionable no revellings no company ever admitted into this inner-
house all genteel quiet and easy in it the nymphs well-bred and
well-read her first disgusts to the old one got over it must be miss
howe therefore  who once was in danger of being taken in by one of our
class by honest sir george colmar as thou hast heard   that makes my
progress difficult 

thou seest belford by the above precautionaries that i forget nothing 
as the song says it is not to be imagined

 on what slight strings
 depend these things
 on which men build their glory 

so far so good i shall never rest till i have discovered in the first
place where the dear creature puts her letters and in the next till i
have got her to a play to a concert or to take an airing with me out of
town for a day or two 


 


i gave thee just now some of my contrivances dorcas who is ever
attentive to all her lady's motions has given me some instances of her
mistress's precautions she wafers her letters it seems in two places 
pricks the wafers and then seals upon them no doubt but the same care
is taken with regard to those brought to her for she always examines the
seals of the latter before she opens them 

i must i must come at them this difficulty augments my curiosity 
strange so much as she writes and at all hours that not one sleepy or
forgetful moment has offered in our favour 

a fair contention thou seest nor plead thou in her favour her youth 
her beauty her family her fortune credulity she has none and with
regard to her tender years am i not a young fellow myself as to
beauty pr'ythee jack do thou to spare my modesty make a comparison
between my clarissa for a woman and thy lovelace for a man for her
family that was not known to its country a century ago and i hate them
all but her have i not cause for her fortune fortune thou knowest 
was ever a stimulus with me and this for reasons not ignoble do not
girls of fortune adorn themselves on purpose to engage our attention 
seek they not to draw us into their snares depend they not generally 
upon their fortunes in the views they have upon us more than on their
merits shall we deprive them of the benefit of their principal
dependence can i in particular marry every girl who wishes to obtain
my notice if therefore in support of the libertine principles for
which none of the sweet rogues hate us a woman of fortune is brought to
yield homage to her emperor and any consequences attend the subjugation 
is not such a one shielded by her fortune as well from insult and
contempt as from indigence all then that admits of debate between my
beloved and me is only this which of the two has more wit more
circumspection and that remains to be tried 

a sad life however this life of doubt and suspense for the poor lady
to live as well as for me that is to say if she be not naturally
jealous if she be her uneasiness is constitutional and she cannot help
it nor will it in that case hurt her for a suspicious temper will
make occasion for doubt if none were to offer to its hand my fair one
therefore if naturally suspicious is obliged to me for saving her the
trouble of studying for these occasions but after all the plainest
paths in our journeys through life are the safest and best i believe 
although it is not given me to choose them i am not however singular
in the pursuit of the more intricate paths since there are thousands 
and ten thousands who had rather fish in troubled waters than in smooth 



letter xxi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday may 9 


i am a very unhappy man this lady is said to be one of the sweetest-
tempered creatures in the world and so i thought her but to me she is
one of the most perverse i never was supposed to be an ill-natured
mortal neither how can it be i imagined for a long while that we
were born to make each other happy but quite the contrary we really
seem to be sent to plague each other 

i will write a comedy i think i have a title already and that's half
the work the quarrelsome lovers twill do there's something new and
striking in it yet more or less all lovers quarrel old terence has
taken notice of that and observes upon it that lovers falling out
occasions lovers falling in and a better understanding of course tis
natural that it should be so but with us we fall out so often without
falling in once and a second quarrel so generally happens before a first
is made up that it is hard to guess what event our loves will be
attended with but perseverance is my glory and patience my handmaid 
when i have in view an object worthy of my attempts what is there in an
easy conquest hudibras questions well 

 what mad lover ever dy'd
 to gain a soft and easy bride 
 or for a lady tender-hearted 
 in purling streams or hemp departed 

but i will lead to the occasion of this preamble 

i had been out on my return meeting dorcas on the stairs your lady in
her chamber dorcas in the dining-room sir and if ever you hope for
an opportunity to come at a letter it must be now for at her feet i
saw one lie which as may be seen by its open fold she had been
reading with a little parcel of others she is now busied with all
pulled out of her pocket as i believe so sir you'll know where to
find them another time 

i was ready to leap for joy and instantly resolved to bring forward an
expedient which i had held in petto and entering the dining-room with an
air of transport i boldly clasped my arms about her as she sat she
huddling up her papers in her handkerchief all the time the dropped
paper unseen o my dearest life a lucky expedient have mr mennell and
i hit upon just now in order to hasten mrs fretchville to quit the
house i have agreed if you approve of it to entertain her cook her
housemaid and two men-servants about whom she was very solicitous 
till you are provided to your mind and that no accommodations may be
wanted i have consented to take the household linen at an appraisement 

i am to pay down five hundred pounds and the remainder as soon as the
bills can be looked up and the amount of them adjusted thus will you
have a charming house entirely ready to receive you some of the ladies
of my family will soon be with you they will not permit you long to
suspend my happy day and that nothing may be wanting to gratify your
utmost punctilio i will till then consent to stay here at mrs 
sinclair's while you reside at your new house and leave the rest to your
own generosity o my beloved creature will not this be agreeable to
you i am sure it will it must and clasping her closer to me i gave
her a more fervent kiss than ever i had dared to give her before i
permitted not my ardour to overcome my discretion however for i took
care to set my foot upon the letter and scraped it farther from her as
it were behind her chair 

she was in a passion at the liberty i took bowing low i begged her
pardon and stooping still lower in the same motion took up the letter 
and whipt it into my bosom 

pox on me for a puppy a fool a blockhead a clumsy varlet a mere jack
belford i thought myself a much cleverer fellow than i am why could i
not have been followed in by dorcas who might have taken it up while i
addressed her lady 

for here the letter being unfolded i could not put it in my bosom
without alarming her ears as my sudden motion did her eyes up she flew
in a moment traitor judas her eyes flashing lightning and a
perturbation in her eager countenance so charming what have you taken
up and then what for both my ears i durst not have done to her she
made no scruple to seize the stolen letter though in my bosom 

what was to be done on so palpable a detection i clasped her hand 
which had hold of the ravished paper between mine o my beloved
creature said i can you think i have not some curiosity is it
possible you can be thus for ever employed and i loving narrative
letter-writing above every other species of writing and admiring your
talent that way should not thus upon the dawn of my happiness as i
presume to hope burn with a desire to be admitted into so sweet a
correspondence 

let go my hand stamping with her pretty foot how dare you sir at
this rate i see too plainly i see and more she could not say but 
gasping was ready to faint with passion and affright the devil a bit
of her accustomed gentleness to be seen in her charming face or to be
heard in her musical voice 

having gone thus far loth very loth was i to lose my prize once more
i got hold of the rumpled-up letter impudent man were her words 
stamping again for god's sake then it was i let go my prize lest
she should faint away but had the pleasure first to find my hand within
both hers she trying to open my reluctant fingers how near was my
heart at that moment to my hand throbbing to my fingers' ends to be
thus familiarly although angrily treated by the charmer of my soul 

when she had got it in her possession she flew to the door i threw
myself in her way shut it and in the humblest manner besought her to
forgive me and yet do you think the harlowe-hearted charmer
 notwithstanding the agreeable annunciation i came in with would forgive
me no truly but pushing me rudely from the door as if i had been
nothing  yet do i love to try so innocently to try her strength too  
she gained that force through passion which i had lost through fear out
she shot to her own apartment  thank my stars she could fly no farther  
and as soon as she entered it in a passion still she double-locked and
double-bolted herself in this my comfort on reflection that upon a
greater offence it cannot be worse 

i retreated to my own apartment with my heart full and my man will not
being near me gave myself a plaguy knock on the forehead with my double
fist 

and now is my charmer shut up from me refusing to see me refusing her
meals she resolves not to see me that's more never again if she can
help it and in the mind she is in i hope she has said 

the dear creatures whenever they quarrel with their humble servants 
should always remember this saving clause that they may not be forsworn 

but thinkest thou that i will not make it the subject of one of my first
plots to inform myself of the reason why all this commotion was necessary
on so slight an occasion as this would have been were not the letters that
pass between these ladies of a treasonable nature 


wednesday morning 

no admission to breakfast any more than to supper i wish this lady is
not a simpleton after all 

i have sent up in captain mennell's name 

a message from captain mennell madam 

it won't do she is of baby age she cannot be a solomon i was going
to say in every thing solomon jack was the wisest man but didst
ever hear who was the wisest woman i want a comparison for this lady 
cunning women and witches we read of without number but i fancy wisdom
never entered into the character of a woman it is not a requisite of
the sex women indeed make better sovereigns than men but why is
that because the women-sovereigns are governed by men the men-
sovereigns by women charming by my soul for hence we guess at the
rudder by which both are steered 

but to putting wisdom out of the question and to take cunning in that
is to say to consider woman as a woman what shall we do if this lady
has something extraordinary in her head repeated charges has she given
to wilson by a particular messenger to send any letter directed for her
the moment it comes 

i must keep a good look-out she is not now afraid of her brother's
plot i shan't be at all surprised if singleton calls upon miss howe 
as the only person who knows or is likely to know where miss harlowe
is pretending to have affairs of importance and of particular service
to her if he can but be admitted to her speech of compromise who
knows from her brother 

then will miss howe warn her to keep close then will my protection be
again necessary this will do i believe any thing from miss howe
must 

joseph leman is a vile fellow with her and my implement joseph honest
joseph as i call him may hang himself i have played him off enough 
and have very little further use for him no need to wear one plot to
the stumps when i can find new ones every hour 

nor blame me for the use i make of my talents who that hath such will
let em be idle 

well then i will find a singleton that's all i have to do 

instantly find one will 

sir 

this moment call me hither thy cousin paul wheatly just come from sea 
whom thou wert recommending to my service if i were to marry and keep
a pleasure-boat 

presto will's gone paul will be here presently presently to mrs 
howe's if paul be singleton's mate coming from his captain it will do
as well as if it were singleton himself 

sally a little devil often reproaches me with the slowness of my
proceedings but in a play does not the principal entertainment lie in
the first four acts is not all in a manner over when you come to the
fifth and what a vulture of a man must he be who souses upon his prey 
and in the same moment trusses and devours 

but to own the truth i have overplotted myself to my make my work
secure as i thought i have frighted the dear creature with the sight of
my four hottentots and i shall be a long time i doubt before i can
recover my lost ground and then this cursed family at harlowe-place
have made her out of humour with me with herself and with all the
world but miss howe who no doubt is continually adding difficulties
to my other difficulties 

i am very unwilling to have recourse to measures which these demons below
are continually urging me to take because i am sure that at last i
shall be brought to make her legally mine 

one complete trial over and i think i will do her noble justice 


 


well paul's gone gone already has all his lessons a notable fellow 
 lord w s necessary-man was paul before he went to sea a more
sensible rogue paul than joseph not such a pretender to piety neither
as the other at what a price have i bought that joseph i believe i
must punish the rascal at last but must let him marry first then
 though that may be punishment enough i shall punish two at once in the
man and his wife and how richly does betty deserve punishment for her
behaviour to my goddess 

but now i hear the rusty hinges of my beloved's door give me creaking
invitation my heart creaks and throbs with respondent trepidations 
whimsical enough though for what relation has a lover's heart to a rusty
pair of hinges but they are the hinges that open and shut the door of
my beloved's bed-chamber relation enough in that 

i hear not the door shut again i shall receive her commands i hope
anon what signifies her keeping me thus at a distance she must be
mine let me do or offer what i will courage whenever i assume all is
over for should she think of escaping from hence whither can she fly
to avoid me her parents will not receive her her uncles will not
entertain her her beloved norton is in their direction and cannot 
miss howe dare not she has not one friend in town but me is entirely a
stranger to the town and what then is the matter with me that i should
be thus unaccountably over-awed and tyrannized over by a dear creature
who wants only to know how impossible it is that she should escape me in
order to be as humble to me as she is to her persecuting relations 

should i ever make the grand attempt and fail and should she hate me
for it her hatred can be but temporary she has already incurred the
censure of the world she must therefore choose to be mine for the sake
of soldering up her reputation in the eye of that impudent world for 
who that knows me and knows that she has been in my power though but
for twenty-four hours will think her spotless as to fact let her
inclination be what it will and then human nature is such a well-known
rogue that every man and woman judges by what each knows of him or
herself that inclination is no more to be trusted where an opportunity
is given than i am especially where a woman young and blooming loves
a man well enough to go off with him for such will be the world's
construction in the present case 

she calls her maid dorcas no doubt that i may hear her harmonious
voice and to give me an opportunity to pour out my soul at her feet to
renew all my vows and to receive her pardon for the past offence and
then with what pleasure shall i begin upon a new score and afterwards
wipe out that and begin another and another till the last offence
passes and there can be no other and once after that to be forgiven 
will be to be forgiven for ever 


 


the door is again shut dorcas tells me that her lady denies to admit me
to dine with her a favour i had ordered the wench to beseech her to
grant me the next time she saw her not uncivilly however denies 
coming-to by degrees nothing but the last offence the honest wench
tells me in the language of her principals below will do with her the
last offence is meditating yet this vile recreant heart of mine plays
me booty 

but here i conclude though the tyranness leaves me nothing to do but to
read write and fret 

subscription is formal between us besides i am so much her's that i
cannot say how much i am thine or any other person's 



letter xxii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
tuesday may 9 


if my dear you approve of the application to my uncle harlowe i wish
it to be made as soon as possible we are quite out again i have shut
myself up from him the offence indeed not so very great and yet it is
too he had like to have got a letter one of your's but never will
i write again or re-peruse my papers in an apartment where he thinks
himself entitled to come he did not read a line of it indeed he did
not so don't be uneasy and depend upon future caution 

thus it was the sun being upon my closet and mr lovelace abroad 


she then gives miss howe an account of his coming by surprise upon her 
 of his fluttering speech of his bold address of her struggle with
 him for the letter etc 

and now my dear proceeds she i am more and more convinced that i am
too much in his power to make it prudent to stay with him and if my
friends will but give me hope i will resolve to abandon him for ever 

o my dear he is a fierce a foolish an insolent creature and in
truth i hardly expect that we can accommodate how much unhappier am i
already with him than my mother ever was with my father after marriage 
since and that without any reason any pretence in the world for it he
is for breaking my spirit before i am his and while i am or ought to be
 o my folly that i am not   in my own power 

till i can know whether my friends will give me hope or not i must do
what i never studied to do before in any case that is try to keep this
difference open and yet it will make me look little in my own eyes 
because i shall mean by it more than i can own but this is one of the
consequences of all engagements where the minds are unpaired dispaired 
in my case i must say 

let this evermore be my caution to individuals of my sex guard your eye 
twill ever be in a combination against your judgment if there are two
parts to be taken it will be for ever traitor as it is taking the wrong
one 

if you ask me my dear how this caution befits me let me tell you a
secret which i have but very lately found out upon self-examination 
although you seem to have made the discovery long ago that had not my
foolish eye been too much attached i had not taken the pains to attempt 
so officiously as i did the prevention of mischief between him and some
of my family which first induced the correspondence between us and was
the occasion of bringing the apprehended mischief with double weight upon
himself my vanity and conceit as far as i know might have part in the
inconsiderate measure for does it not look as if i thought myself more
capable of obviating difficulties than anybody else of my family 

but you must not my dear suppose my heart to be still a confederate
with my eye that deluded eye now clearly sees its fault and the misled
heart despises it for it hence the application i am making to my uncle 
hence it is that i can say i think truly that i would atone for my
fault at any rate even by the sacrifice of a limb or two if that would
do 

adieu my dearest friend may your heart never know the hundredth part
of the pain mine at present feels prays

your
clarissa harlowe 



letter xxiii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
wednesday may 10 


i will write no man shall write for me no woman shall hinder me from
writing surely i am of age to distinguish between reason and caprice 
i am not writing to a man am i if i were carrying on a correspondence
with a fellow of whom my mother disapproved and whom it might be
improper for me to encourage my own honour and my duty would engage my
obedience but as the case is so widely different not a word more on
this subject i beseech you 


 clarissa proposes mr hickman to write for miss howe see letter xi 
of this volume paragr 5 and ult 


i much approve of your resolution to leave this wretch if you can make
it up with your uncle 

i hate the man most heartily do i hate him for his teasing ways the
very reading of your account of them teases me almost as much as they can
you may you have encouragement to fly the foolish wretch 

i have other reasons to wish you may for i have just made an
acquaintance with one who knows a vast deal of his private history the
man is really a villain my dear an execrable one if all be true that i
have heard and yet i am promised other particulars i do assure you 
my dear friend that had he a dozen lives he might have forfeited them
all and been dead twenty crimes ago 

if ever you condescend to talk familiarly with him again ask him after
miss betterton and what became of her and if he shuffle and
prevaricate as to her question him about miss lockyer o my dear the
man's a villain 

i will have your uncle sounded as you desire and that out of hand but
yet i am afraid of the success and this for several reasons tis hard
to say what the sacrifice of your estate would do with some people and
yet i must not when it comes to the test permit you to make it 

as your hannah continues ill i would advise you to try to attach dorcas
to your interest have you not been impoliticly shy of her 

i wish you could come at some of his letters surely a man of his
negligent character cannot be always guarded if he be and if you
cannot engage your servant i shall suspect them both let him be called
upon at a short warning when he is writing or when he has papers lying
about and so surprise him into negligence 

such inquiries i know are of the same nature with those we make at an
inn in traveling when we look into every corner and closet for fear of
a villain yet should be frighted out of our wits were we to find one 
but tis better to detect such a one when awake and up than to be
attacked by him when in bed and asleep 

i am glad you have your clothes but no money no books but a spira a
drexelius and a practice of piety those who sent the latter ought to
have kept it for themselves but i must hurry myself from this subject 

you have exceedingly alarmed me by what you hint of his attempt to get
one of my letters i am assured by my new informant that he is the head
of a gang of wretched those he brought you among no doubt were some of
them who join together to betray innocent creatures and to support one
another afterwards by violence and were he to come at the knowledge of
the freedoms i take with him i should be afraid to stir out without a
guard 

i am sorry to tell you that i have reason to think that your brother
has not laid aside his foolish plot a sunburnt sailor-looking fellow
was with me just now pretending great service to you from captain
singleton could he be admitted to your speech i pleaded ignorance as
to the place of your abode the fellow was too well instructed for me to
get any thing out of him 

i wept for two hours incessantly on reading your's which enclosed that
from your cousin morden my dearest creature do not desert yourself 
let your anna howe obey the call of that friendship which has united us
as one soul and endeavour to give you consolation 


 see letter xix of this volume 


i wonder not at the melancholy reflections you so often cast upon
yourself in your letters for the step you have been forced upon on one
hand and tricked into on the other a strange fatality as if it were
designed to show the vanity of all human prudence i wish my dear as
you hint that both you and i have not too much prided ourselves in a
perhaps too conscious superiority over others but i will stop how apt
are weak minds to look out for judgments in any extraordinary event 
tis so far right that it is better and safer and juster to arraign
ourselves or our dearest friends than providence which must always
have wise ends to answer its dispensations 

but do not talk as if one of your former of being a warning only you
will be as excellent an example as ever you hoped to be as well as a
warning and that will make your story to all that shall come to know
it of double efficacy for were it that such a merit as yours could not
ensure to herself noble and generous usage from a libertine heart who
will expect any tolerable behaviour from men of his character 


 see vol iii letter xxviii 


if you think yourself inexcusable for taking a step that put you into the
way of delusion without any intention to go off with him what must
those giddy creatures think of themselves who without half your
provocations and inducements and without any regard to decorum leap
walls drop from windows and steal away from their parents' house to
the seducer's bed in the same day 

again if you are so ready to accuse yourself for dispensing with the
prohibitions of the most unreasonable parents which yet were but half-
prohibitions at first what ought those to do who wilfully shut their
ears to the advice of the most reasonable and that perhaps where
apparent ruin or undoubted inconvenience is the consequence of the
predetermined rashness 

and lastly to all who will know your story you will be an excellent
example of watchfulness and of that caution and reserve by which a
prudent person who has been supposed to be a little misled endeavours
to mend her error and never once losing sight of her duty does all in
her power to recover the path she has been rather driven out of than
chosen to swerve from 

come come my dearest friend consider but these things and steadily 
without desponding pursue your earnest purposes to amend what you think
has been amiss and it may not be a misfortune in the end that you have
erred especially as so little of your will was in your error 

and indeed i must say that i use the words misled and error and such-
like only in compliment to your own too-ready self-accusations and to
the opinion of one to whom i owe duty for i think in my conscience that
every part of your conduct is defensible and that those only are
blamable who have no other way to clear themselves but by condemning you 

i expect however that such melancholy reflections as drop from your pen
but too often will mingle with all your future pleasures were you to
marry lovelace and were he to make the best of husbands 

you was immensely happy above the happiness of a mortal creature before
you knew him every body almost worshipped you envy itself which has of
late reared up its venomous head against you was awed by your superior
worthiness into silence and admiration you was the soul of every
company where you visited your elders have i seen declining to offer
their opinions upon a subject till you had delivered yours often to
save themselves the mortification of retracting theirs when they heard
yours yet in all this your sweetness of manners your humility and
affability caused the subscription every one made to your sentiments 
and to your superiority to be equally unfeigned and unhesitating for
they saw that their applause and the preference they gave you to
themselves subjected not themselves to insults nor exalted you into any
visible triumph over them for you had always something to say on every
point you carried that raised the yielding heart and left every one
pleased and satisfied with themselves though they carried not off the
palm 

your works were showed or referred to wherever fine works were talked of 
nobody had any but an inferior and second-hand praise for diligence for
economy for reading for writing for memory for facility in learning
every thing laudable and even for the more envied graces of person and
dress and an all-surpassing elegance in both where you were known and
those subjects talked of 

the poor blessed you every step you trod the rich thought you their
honour and took a pride that they were not obliged to descend from their
own class for an example that did credit to it 

though all men wished for you and sought you young as you were yet 
had not those who were brought to address you been encouraged out of
sordid and spiteful views not one of them would have dared to lift up
his eyes to you 

thus happy in all about you thus making happy all within your circle 
could you think that nothing would happen to you to convince you that
you were not to be exempted from the common lot to convinced you that
you were not absolutely perfect and that you must not expect to pass
through life without trial temptation and misfortune 

indeed it must be owned that no trial no temptation worthy of your
virtue and of your prudence could well have attacked you sooner 
because of your tender years and more effectually than those heavy ones
under which you struggle since it must be allowed that you equanimity
and foresight made you superior to common accidents for are not most of
the troubles that fall to the lot of common mortals brought upon
themselves either by their too large desires or too little deserts 
cases both from which you stood exempt it was therefore to be some
man or some worse spirit in the shape of one that formed on purpose 
was to be sent to invade you while as many other such spirits as there
are persons in your family were permitted to take possession severally 
in one dark hour of the heart of every one of it there to sit perching 
perhaps and directing every motion to the motions of the seducer
without in order to irritate to provoke to push you forward to meet
him 

upon the whole there seems as i have often said to have been a kind of
fate in your error if it were an error and this perhaps admitted for
the sake of a better example to be collected from your sufferings than
could have been given had you never erred for my dear the time of
adversity is your shining-time i see it evidently that adversity must
call forth graces and beauties which could not have been brought to light
in a run of that prosperous fortune which attended you from your cradle
till now admirably as you became and as we all thought greatly as you
deserved that prosperity 

all the matter is the trial must be grievous to you it is to me it is
to all who love you and looked upon you as one set aloft to be admired
and imitated and not as a mark as you have lately found for envy to
shoot its shafts at 

let what i have written above have its due weight with you my dear and
then as warm imaginations are not without a mixture of enthusiasm your
anna howe who on reperusal of it imagines it to be in a style superior
to her usual style will be ready to flatter herself that she has been in
a manner inspired with the hints that have comforted and raised the
dejected heart of her suffering friend who from such hard trials in a
bloom so tender may find at times her spirits sunk too low to enable her
to pervade the surrounding darkness which conceals from her the hopeful
dawning of the better day which awaits her 

i will add no more at present than that i am
your ever faithful and affectionate
anna howe 



letter xxiv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
friday may 12 


i must be silent my exalted friend under praises that oppress my heart
with a consciousness of not deserving them at the same time that the
generous design of those praises raises and comforts it for it is a
charming thing to stand high in the opinion of those we love and to find
that there are souls that can carry their friendships beyond accidents 
beyond body and ties of blood whatever my dearest creature is my
shining-time the time of a friend's adversity is yours and it would be
almost a fault in me to regret those afflictions which give you an
opportunity so gloriously to exert those qualities which not only
ennoble our sex but dignify human nature 

but let me proceed to subjects less agreeable 

i am sorry you have reason to think singleton's projects are not at an
end but who knows what the sailor had to propose yet had any good
been intended me this method would hardly have been fallen upon 

depend upon it my dear your letters shall be safe 

i have made a handle of mr lovelace's bold attempt and freedom as i
told you i would to keep him ever since at a distance that i may have
an opportunity to see the success of the application to my uncle and to
be at liberty to embrace any favourable overtures that may arise from it 
yet he has been very importunate and twice brought mr mennell from mrs 
fretchvill to talk about the house if i should be obliged to make up
with him again i shall think i am always doing myself a spite 

as to what you mention of his newly-detected crimes and your advice to
attach dorcas to my interest and to come at some of his letters these
things will require more or less of my attention as i may hope favour or
not from my uncle harlowe 

i am sorry that my poor hannah continues ill pray my dear inform
yourself and let me know whether she wants any thing that befits her
case 

i will not close this letter till to-morrow is over for i am resolved to
go to church and this as well for the sake of my duty as to see if i am
at liberty to go out when i please without being attended or accompanied 


sunday may 14 

i have not been able to avoid a short debate with mr lovelace i had
ordered a coach to the door when i had noticed that it was come i went
out of my chamber to go to it but met him dressed on the stairs head 
with a book in his hand but without his hat and sword he asked with
an air very solemn yet respectful if i were going abroad i told him i
was he desired leave to attend me if i were going to church i
refused him and then he complained heavily of my treatment of him and
declared that he would not live such another week as the past for the
world 

i owned to him very frankly that i had made an application to my
friends and that i was resolved to keep myself to myself till i knew the
issue of it 

he coloured and seemed surprised but checking himself in something he
was going to say he pleaded my danger from singleton and again desired
to attend me 

and then he told me that mrs fretchville had desired to continue a
fortnight longer in the house she found said he that i was unable to
determine about entering upon it and now who knows when such a vapourish
creature will come to a resolution this madam has been an unhappy
week for had i not stood upon such bad terms with you you might have
been new mistress of that house and probably had my cousin montague if
not lady betty actually with you 

and so sir taking all you say for granted your cousin montague cannot
come to mrs sinclair's what pray is her objection to mrs 
sinclair's is this house fit for me to live in a month or two and not
fit for any of your relations for a few days and mrs fretchville has
taken more time too then pushing by him i hurried down stairs 

he called to dorcas to bring him his sword and hat and following me down
into the passage placed himself between me and the door and again
desired leave to attend me 

mrs sinclair came out at that instant and asked me if i did not choose
a dish of chocolate 

i wish mrs sinclair said i you would take this man in with you to
your chocolate i don't know whether i am at liberty to stir out without
his leave or not 

then turning to him i asked if he kept me there his prisoner 

dorcas just then bringing him his sword and hat he opened the street-
door and taking my reluctant hand led me in a very obsequious manner 
to the coach people passing by stopped stared and whispered but he
is so graceful in his person and dress that he generally takes every
eye 

i was uneasy to be so gazed at and he stepped in after me and the
coachman drove to st paul's 

he was very full of assiduities all the way while i was as reserved as
possible and when i returned dined as i had done the greatest part of
the week by myself 

he told me upon my resolving to do so that although he would continue
his passive observance till i knew the issue of my application yet i
must expect that then i should not rest one moment till i had fixed his
happy day for that his very soul was fretted with my slights 
resentments and delays 

a wretch when can i say to my infinite regret on a double account 
that all he complains of is owing to himself 

o that i may have good tidings from my uncle 

adieu my dearest friend this shall lie ready for an exchange as i hope
for one to-morrow from you that will decide as i may say the destiny
of

your
clarissa harlowe 



letter xxv

miss howe to mrs judith norton
thursday may 11 


good mrs norton 

cannot you without naming me as an adviser who am hated by the family 
contrive a way to let mrs harlowe know that in an accidental
conversation with me you had been assured that my beloved friend pines
after a reconciliation with her relations that she has hitherto in
hopes of it refused to enter into any obligation that shall be in the
least a hinderance  sic  to it that she would fain avoid giving mr 
lovelace a right to make her family uneasy in relation to her
grandfather's estate that all she wishes for still is to be indulged in
her choice of a single life and on that condition would make her
father's pleasure her's with regard to that estate that mr lovelace is
continually pressing her to marry him and all his friends likewise but
that i am sure she has so little liking to the man because of his faulty
morals and of the antipathy of her relations to him that if she had any
hope given her of a reconciliation she would forego all thoughts of him 
and put herself into her father's protection but that their resolution
must be speedy for otherwise she would find herself obliged to give way
to his pressing entreaties and it might then be out of her power to
prevent disagreeable litigations 

i do assure you mrs norton upon my honour that our dearest friend
knows nothing of this procedure of mine and therefore it is proper to
acquaint you in confidence with my grounds for it these are they 

she had desired me to let mr hickman drop hints to the above effect to
her uncle harlowe but indirectly as from himself lest if the
application should not be attended with success and mr lovelace who
already takes it ill that he has so little of her favour come to know
it she may be deprived of every protection and be perhaps subjected to
great inconveniencies from so haughty a spirit 

having this authority from her and being very solicitous about the
success of the application i thought that if the weight of so good a
wife mother and sister as mrs harlowe is known to be were thrown
into the same scale with that of mr john harlowe supposing he could be
engaged it could hardly fail of making a due impression 

mr hickman will see mr john harlowe to-morrow by that time you may see
mrs harlowe if mr hickman finds the old gentleman favourable he will
tell him that you will have seen mrs harlowe upon the same account and
will advise him to join in consultation with her how best to proceed to
melt the most obdurate heart in the world 

this is the fair state of the matter and my true motive for writing to
you i leave all therefore to your discretion and most heartily wish
success to it being of opinion that mr lovelace cannot possibly deserve
our admirable friend nor indeed know i the man who does 

pray acquaint me by a line of the result of your interposition if it
prove not such as may be reasonably hoped for our dear friend shall know
nothing of this step from me and pray let her not from you for in
that case it would only give deeper grief to a heart already too much
afflicted i am dear and worthy mrs norton 

your true friend 
anna howe 



letter xxvi

mrs norton to miss howe
saturday may 13 


dear madam 

my heart is almost broken to be obliged to let you know that such is
the situation of things in the family of my ever-dear miss harlowe that
there can be at present no success expected from any application in her
favour her poor mother is to be pitied i have a most affecting letter
from her but must not communicate it to you and she forbids me to let
it be known that she writes upon the subject although she is compelled 
as it were to do it for the ease of her own heart i mention it
therefore in confidence 

i hope in god that my beloved young lady has preserved her honour
inviolate i hope there is not a man breathing who could attempt a
sacrilege so detestable i have no apprehension of a failure in a virtue
so established god for ever keep so pure a heart out of the reach of
surprises and violence ease dear madam i beseech you my over-anxious
heart by one line by the bearer although but one line to acquaint me
 as surely you can that her honour is unsullied if it be not adieu to
all the comforts this life can give since none will it be able to afford

to the poor
judith norton 



letter xxvii

miss howe to mrs judith norton
saturday evening may 13 


dear good woman 

your beloved's honour is inviolate must be inviolate and will be so 
in spite of men and devils could i have had hope of a reconciliation 
all my view was that she should not have had this man all that can be
said now is she must run the risk of a bad husband she of whom no man
living is worthy 

you pity her mother so do not i i pity no mother that puts it out of
her power to show maternal love and humanity in order to patch up for
herself a precarious and sorry quiet which every blast of wind shall
disturb 

i hate tyrants in ever form and shape but paternal and maternal tyrants
are the worst of all for they can have no bowels 

i repeat that i pity none of them our beloved friend only deserves
pity she had never been in the hands of this man but for them she is
quite blameless you don't know all her story were i to tell you that
she had no intention to go off with this man it would avail her nothing 
it would only deserve to condemn with those who drove her to
extremities him who now must be her refuge i am

your sincere friend and servant 
anna howe 


letter xxviii

mrs harlowe to mrs norton
 not communicated till the letters came to be collected  
saturday may 13 


i return an answer in writing as i promised to your communication but
take no notice either to my bella's betty who i understand sometimes
visits you or to the poor wretch herself nor to any body that i do
write i charge you don't my heart is full writing may give some vent
to my griefs and perhaps i may write what lies most upon my heart 
without confining myself strictly to the present subject 

you know how dear this ungrateful creature ever was to us all you know
how sincerely we joined with every one of those who ever had seen her or
conversed with her to praise and admire her and exceeded in our praise
even the bounds of that modesty which because she was our own should
have restrained us being of opinion that to have been silent in the
praise of so apparent a merit must rather have argued blindness or
affectation in us than that we should incur the censure of vain
partiality to our own 

when therefore any body congratulated us on such a daughter we received
their congratulations without any diminution if it was said you are
happy in this child we owned that no parents ever were happier in a
child if more particularly they praised her dutiful behaviour to us 
we said she knew not how to offend if it were said miss clarissa
harlowe has a wit and penetration beyond her years we instead of
disallowing it would add and a judgment no less extraordinary than her
wit if her prudence was praised and a forethought which every one saw
supplied what only years and experience gave to others nobody need to
scruple taking lessons from clarissa harlowe was our proud answer 

forgive me o forgive me my dear norton but i know you will for yours 
when good was this child and your glory as well as mine 

but have you not heard strangers as she passed to and from church stop
to praise the angel of a creature as they called her when it was enough
for those who knew who she was to cry why it is miss clarissa harlowe 
 as if every body were obliged to know or to have heard of clarissa
harlowe and of her excellencies while accustomed to praise it was
too familiar to her to cause her to alter either her look or her pace 

for my own part i could not stifle a pleasure that had perhaps a faulty
vanity for its foundation whenever i was spoken of or addressed to as
the mother of so sweet a child mr harlowe and i all the time loving
each other the better for the share each had in such a daughter 

still still indulge the fond the overflowing heart of a mother i
could dwell for ever upon the remembrance of what she was would but that
remembrance banish from my mind what she is 

in her bosom young as she was could i repose all my griefs sure of
receiving from her prudence and advice as well as comfort and both
insinuated in so dutiful a manner that it was impossible to take those
exceptions which the distance of years and character between a mother and
a daughter would have made one apprehensive of from any other daughter 
she was our glory when abroad our delight when at home every body was
even covetous of her company and we grudged her to our brothers harlowe 
and to our sister and brother hervey no other contention among us 
then but who should be next favoured by her no chiding ever knew she
from us but the chiding of lovers when she was for shutting herself up
too long together from us in pursuit of those charming amusements and
useful employments for which however the whole family was the better 

our other children had reason good children as they always were to
think themselves neglected but they likewise were so sensible of their
sister's superiority and of the honour she reflected upon the whole
family that they confessed themselves eclipsed without envying the
eclipser indeed there was not any body so equal with her in their own
opinions as to envy what all aspired but to emulate the dear creature 
you know my norton gave an eminence to us all 

then her acquirements her skill in music her fine needle-works her
elegance in dress for which she was so much admired that the
neighbouring ladies used to say that they need not fetch fashions from
london since whatever miss clarissa harlowe wore was the best fashion 
because her choice of natural beauties set those of art far behind them 
her genteel ease and fine turn of person her deep reading and these 
joined to her open manners and her cheerful modesty o my good norton 
what a sweet child was once my clary harlowe 

this and more you knew her to be for many of her excellencies were
owing to yourself and with the milk you gave her you gave her what no
other nurse in the world could give her 

and do you think my worthy woman do you think that the wilful lapse of
such a child is to be forgiven can she herself think that she deserves
not the severest punishment for the abuse of such talents as were
intrusted to her 

her fault was a fault of premeditation of cunning of contrivance she
had deceived every body's expectations her whole sex as well as the
family she sprung from is disgraced by it 

would any body ever have believed that such a young creature as this who
had by her advice saved even her over-lively friend from marrying a fop 
and a libertine would herself have gone off with one of the vilest and
most notorious of libertines a man whose character she knew and knew
it to be worse than the character of him from whom she saved her friend 
a man against whom she was warned one who had her brother's life in her
hands and who constantly set our whole family at defiance 

think for me my good norton think what my unhappiness must be both as a
wife and a mother what restless days what sleepless nights yet my own
rankling anguish endeavoured to be smoothed over to soften the anguish
of fiercer spirits and to keep them from blazing out to further
mischief o this naughty naughty girl who knew so well what she did 
and who could look so far into consequences that we thought she would
have died rather than have done as she had done 

her known character for prudence leaves her absolutely without excuse 
how then can i offer to plead for her if through motherly indulgence 
i would forgive her myself and have we not moreover suffered all the
disgrace that can befall us has not she 

if now she has so little liking to his morals has she not reason before
to have as little or has she suffered by them in her own person o my
good woman i doubt i doubt will not the character of the man make one
doubt an angel if once in his power the world will think the worst i
am told it does so likewise her father fears her brother hears and
what can i do 

our antipathy to him she knew before as well as his character these
therefore cannot be new motives without a new reason o my dear mrs 
norton how shall i how can you support ourselves under the
apprehensions to which these thoughts lead 

he continually pressing her you say to marry him his friends likewise 
she has reason no doubt she has reason for this application to us and
her crime is glossed over to bring her to us with new disgrace 
whither whither does one guilty step lead the misguided heart and
now truly to save a stubborn spirit we are only to be sounded that
the application may be occasionally retracted or denied 

upon the whole were i inclined to plead for her it is now the most
improper of all times now that my brother harlowe has discouraged as
he last night came hither on purpose to tell us mr hickman's insinuated
application and been applauded for it now that my brother antony is
intending to carry his great fortune through her fault into another
family she expecting no doubt herself to be put into her
grandfather's estate in consequence of a reconciliation and as a reward
for her fault and insisting still upon the same terms which she offered
before and which were rejected not through my fault i am sure 
rejected 

from all these things you will return such an answer as the case
requires it might cost me the peace of my whole life at this time to
move for her god forgive her if i do nobody else will and let it 
for your own sake as well as mine be a secret that you and i have
entered upon this subject and i desire you not to touch upon it again
but by particular permission for o my dear good woman it sets my
heart a bleeding in as many streams as there are veins in it 

yet think me not impenetrable by a proper contrition and remorse but
what a torment is it to have a will without a power 

adieu adieu god give us both comfort and to the once dear the ever-
dear creature for can a mother forget her child repentance deep
repentance and as little suffering as may befit his blessed will and
her grievous fault prays

your real friend 
charlotte harlowe 



letter xxix

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
sunday may 14 


how it is now my dear between you and mr lovelace i cannot tell 
but wicked as the man is i am afraid he must be your lord and master 

i called him by several very hard names in my last i had but just heard
of some of his vilenesses when i sat down to write so my indignation
was raised but on inquiry and recollection i find that the facts laid
to his charge were all of them committed some time ago not since he has
had strong hopes of your favour 

this is saying something for him his generous behaviour to the
innkeeper's daughter is a more recent instance to his credit to say
nothing of the universal good character he has as a kind landlord and
then i approve much of the motion he made to put you in possession of
mrs fretchville's house while he continues at the other widow's till
you agree that one house shall hold you i wish this were done be sure
you embrace this offer if you do not soon meet at the altar and get
one of his cousins with you 

were you once married i should think you cannot be very unhappy though
you may not be so happy with him as you deserve to be the stake he has
in his country and his reversions the care he takes of his affairs his
freedom from obligation nay his pride with your merit must be a
tolerable security for you i should think though particulars of his
wickedness as they come to my knowledge hurt and incense me yet after
all when i give myself time to reflect all that i have heard of him to
his disadvantage was comprehended in the general character given of him
long ago by lord m s and his own dismissed bailiff and which was
confirmed to me by mrs fortescue as i heretofore told you and to you
by mrs greme 


 see vol i letter iv 
 ibid letter xii 
 see vol iii letter vi 


you can have nothing therefore i think to be deeply concerned about 
but his future good and the bad example he may hereafter set to his own
family these indeed are very just concerns but were you to leave him
now either with or without his consent his fortunes and alliances so
considerable his person and address so engaging every one excusing you
now on those accounts and because of your relations' follies it would
have a very ill appearance for your reputation i cannot therefore on
the most deliberate consideration advise you to think of that while you
have no reason to doubt his honour may eternal vengeance pursue the
villain if he give room for an apprehension of this nature 

yet his teasing ways are intolerable his acquiescence with your slight
delays and his resignedness to the distance you now keep him at for a
fault so much slighter as he must think than the punishment are
unaccountable he doubts your love of him that is very probable but you
have reason to be surprised at his want of ardour a blessing so great
within his reach as i may say 

by the time you have read to this place you will have no doubt of what
has been the issue of the conference between the two gentlemen i am
equally shocked and enraged against them all against them all i say 
for i have tried your good norton's weight with your mother though at
first i did not intend to tell you so to the same purpose as the
gentleman sounded your uncle never were there such determined brutes in
the world why should i mince the matter yet would i fain methinks 
make an exception for your mother 

your uncle will have it that you are ruined he can believe every thing
bad of a creature he says who could run away with a man with such a
one especially as lovelace they expected applications from you when
some heavy distress had fallen upon you but they are all resolved not
to stir an inch in your favour no not to save your life 

my dearest soul resolve to assert your right claim your own and go
and live upon it as you ought then if you marry not how will the
wretches creep to you for your reversionary dispositions 

you were accused as in your aunt's letter of premeditation and
contrivance in your escape  instead of pitying you the mediating
person was called upon to pity them who once your uncle said doated
upon you who took no joy but in your presence who devoured your words
as you spoke them who trod over again your footsteps as you walked
before them  and i know not what of this sort 

upon the whole it is now evident to me and so it must be to you when
you read this letter that you must be his and the sooner you are so
the better shall we suppose that marriage is not in your power i
cannot have patience to suppose that 

i am concerned methinks to know how you will do to condescend now you
see you must be his after you have kept him at such a distance and for
the revenge his pride may put him upon taking for it but let me tell
you that if my going up and sharing fortunes with you will prevent
such a noble creature from stooping too low much more were it likely to
prevent your ruin i would not hesitate a moment about it what is the
whole world to me weighed against such a friend as you are think you 
that any of the enjoyments of this life could be enjoyments to me were
you involved in calamities from which i could either alleviate or
relieve you by giving up those enjoyments and what in saying this and
acting up to it do i offer you but the frits of a friendship your worth
has created 

excuse my warmth of expression the warmth of my heart wants none i am
enraged at your relations for bad as what i have mentioned is i have
not told you all nor now perhaps ever will i am angry at my own
mother's narrowness of mind and at her indiscriminate adherence to old
notions and i am exasperated against your foolish your low-vanity'd
lovelace but let us stoop to take the wretch as he is and make the
best of him since you are destined to stoop to keep grovellers and
worldlings in countenance he had not been guilty of a direct indecency
to you nor dare he not so much of a devil as that comes to neither 
had he such villainous intentions so much in his power as you are they
would have shewn themselves before now to such a penetrating and vigilant
eye and to such a pure heart as yours let us save the wretch then if
we can though we soil our fingers in lifting him up his dirt 

there is yet to a person of your fortune and independence a good deal
to do if you enter upon those terms which ought to be entered upon i
don't find that he has once talked of settlements nor yet of the
license a foolish wretch but as your evil destiny has thrown you out
of all other protection and mediation you must be father mother uncle 
to yourself and enter upon the requisite points for yourself it is
hard upon you but indeed you must your situation requires it what
room for delicacy now or would you have me write to him yet that would
be the same thing as if you were to write yourself yet write you
should i think if you cannot speak but speaking is certainly best 
for words leave no traces they pass as breath and mingle with air and
may be explained with latitude but the pen is a witness on record 

i know the gentleness of your spirit i know the laudable pride of your
heart and the just notion you have of the dignity of our sex in these
delicate points but once more all this in nothing now your honour is
concerned that the dignity i speak of should not be stood upon 

mr lovelace  would i say yet hate the foolish fellow for his low his
stupid pride in wishing to triumph over the dignity of his own wife 
i am by your means deprived of every friend i have in the world in
what light am i to look upon you i have well considered every thing 
you have made some people much against my liking think me a wife 
others know i am not married nor do i desire any body should believe i
am do you think your being here in the same house with me can be to my
reputation you talked to me of mrs fretchville's house  this will
bring him to renew his last discourse on the subject if he does not
revive it of himlsef if mrs fretchville knows not her own mind what
is her house to me you talked of bringing up your cousin montague to
bear me company if my brother's schemes be your pretence for not going
yourself to fetch her you can write to her i insist upon bringing
these two points to an issue off or on ought to be indifferent to me if
so to them 

such a declaration must bring all forward there are twenty ways my dear 
that you would find out for another in your circumstances he will
disdain from his native insolence to have it thought he has any body to
consult well then will he not be obliged to declare himself and if
he does no delays on your side i beseech you give him the day let
it be a short one it would be derogating from your own merit not to be
so explicit as he ought to be to seem but to doubt his meaning and to
wait for that explanation for which i should ever despise him if he
makes it necessary twice already have you my dear if not oftener
modesty'd away such opportunities as you ought not to have slipped as
to settlements if they come not in naturally e'en leave them to his own
justice and to the justice of his family and there's an end of the
matter 

this is my advice mend it as circumstances offer and follow your own 
but indeed my dear this or something like it would i do and let him
tell me afterwards if he dared or would that he humbled down to his
shoe-buckles the person it would have been his glory to exalt 

support yourself mean time with reflections worthy of yourself though
tricked into this man's power you are not meanly subjugated to it all
his reverence you command or rather as i may say inspire since it was
never known that he had any reverence for aught that was good till you
was with him and he professes now and then to be so awed and charmed by
your example as that the force of it shall reclaim him 

i believe you will have a difficult task to keep him to it but the more
will be your honour if you effect his reformation and it is my belief 
that if you can reclaim this great this specious deceiver who has 
morally speaking such a number of years before him you will save from
ruin a multitude of innocents for those seem to me to have been the prey
for which he has spread his wicked snares and who knows but for this
very purpose principally a person may have been permitted to swerve 
whose heart or will never was in her error and who has so much remorse
upon her for having as she thinks erred at all adieu my dearest
friend 

anna howe 


enclosed in the above 

i must trouble you with my concerns though your own are so heavy upon
you a piece of news i have to tell you your uncle antony is disposed
to marry with whom think you with my mother true indeed your
family knows it all is laid with redoubled malice at your door and
there the old soul himself lays it 

take no notice of this intelligence not so much as in your letters to
me for fear of accidents 

i think it can't do but were i to provoke my mother that might afford
a pretence else i should have been with you before now i fancy 

the first likelihood that appears to me of encouragement i dismiss
hickman that's certain if my mother disoblige me in so important an
article i shan't think of obliging her in such another it is
impossible surely that the desire of popping me off to that honest man
can be with such a view 

i repeat that it cannot come to any thing but these widows then such
a love in us all both old and young of being courted and admired and
so irresistible to their elderships to be flattered that all power is
not over with them but that they may still class and prank it with their
daughters it vexed me heartily to have her tell me of this proposal
with self-complaisant simperings and yet she affected to speak of it as
if she had no intention to encourage it 

these antiquated bachelors old before they believe themselves to be so 
imagine that when they have once persuaded themselves to think of the
state they have nothing more to do than to make their minds known to the
woman 

your uncle's overgrown fortune is indeed a bait a tempting one a saucy
daughter to be got rid of the memory of the father of that daughter not
precious enough to weigh much but let him advance if he dare let her
encourage but i hope she won't 

excuse me my dear i am nettled they have fearfully rumpled my
gorget you'll think me faulty so i won't put my name to this
separate paper other hands may resemble mine you did not see me write
it 



letter xxx

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
monday afternoon may 15 


now indeed it is evident my best my only friend that i have but one
choice to make and now i do find that i have carried my resentment
against this man too far since now i am to appear as if under an
obligation to his patience with me for a conduct which perhaps he will
think if not humoursome and childish plainly demonstrative of my little
esteem of him of but a secondary esteem at least where before his
pride rather than his merit had made him expect a first o my dear to
be cast upon a man that is not a generous man that is indeed a cruel
man a man that is capable of creating a distress to a young creature 
who by her evil destiny is thrown into his power and then of enjoying
it as i may say  i verily think i may say so of this savage   what
a fate is mine 

you give me my dear good advice as to the peremptory manner in which i
ought to treat him but do you consider to whom it is that you give it 
and then should i take it and should he be capable of delay i
unprotected desolate nobody to fly to in what a wretched light must i
stand in his eyes and what is still as bad in my own o my dear see
you not as i do that the occasion for this my indelicate my shocking
situation should never have been given by me of all creatures since i
am unequal utterly unequal to the circumstances to which my
inconsideration has reduced me what i to challenge a man for a
husband i to exert myself to quicken the delayer in his resolutions 
and having as you think lost an opportunity to begin to try to recall
it as from myself and for myself to threaten him as i may say into
the marriage state o my dear if this be right to be done how
difficult is it where modesty and self or where pride if you please 
is concerned to do that right or to express myself in your words to
be father mother uncle to myself especially where one thinks a
triumph over one is intended 

you say you have tried mrs norton's weight with my mother bad as the
returns are which my application by mr hickman has met with you tell
me that you have not acquainted me with all the bad nor now perhaps 
ever will  but why so my dear what is the bad what can be the bad 
which now you will never tell me of what worse than renounce me and
for ever my uncle you say believes me ruined he declares that he
can believe every thing bad of a creature who could run away with a man 
and they have all made a resolution not to stir an inch in my favour no 
not to save my life  have you worse than this my dear behind surely
my father has not renewed his dreadful malediction surely if so my
mother has not joined in it have my uncles given their sanction and
made it a family act and themselves thereby more really faulty than
ever they suppose me to be though i the cause of that greater fault in
them what my dear is the worst that you will leave for ever
unrevealed 

o lovelace why comest thou not just now while these black prospects are
before me for now couldst thou look into my heart wouldst thou see a
distress worthy of thy barbarous triumph 


 


i was forced to quit my pen and you say you have tried mrs norton's
weight with my mother 

what is done cannot be remedied but i wish you had not taken a step of
this importance to me without first consulting me forgive me my dear 
but i must tell you that that high-soul'd and noble friendship which you
have ever avowed with so obliging and so uncommon a warmth although it
has been always the subject of my grateful admiration has been often the
ground of my apprehension because of its unbridled fervour 

well but now to look forward you are of opinion that i must be his and
that i cannot leave him with reputation to myself whether with or
without his consent i must if so make the best of the bad matter 

he went out in the morning intending not to return to dinner unless as
he sent me word i would admit him to dine with me 

i excused myself the man whose anger is now to be of such high
importance to me was it seems displeased 

as he as well as i expected that i should receive a letter from you
this day by collins i suppose he will not be long before he returns and
then possibly he is to be mighty stately mighty mannish mighty coy 
if you please and then must i be very humble very submissive and try
to insinuate myself into his good graces with downcast eye if not by
speech beg his forgiveness for the distance i have so perversely kept
him at yes i warrant but i shall see how this behaviour will sit
upon me you have always rallied me upon my meekness i think well
then i will try if i can be still meeker shall i o my dear 

but let me sit with my hands before me all patience all resignation 
for i think i hear him coming up or shall i roundly accost him in the
words in the form which you my dear prescribed 

he is come in he has sent to me all impatience as dorcas says by his
aspect but i cannot cannot see him 


monday night 

the contents of your letter and my own heavy reflections rendered me
incapable of seeing this expecting man the first word he asked dorcas 
was if i had received a letter since he had been out she told me this 
and her answer that i had and was fasting and had been in tears ever
since 

he sent to desire an interview with me 

i answered by her that i was not very well in the morning if better 
i would see him as soon as he pleased 

very humble was it not my dear yet he was too royal to take it for
humility for dorcas told me he rubbed one side of his face impatiently 
and said a rash word and was out of humour stalking about the room 

half an hour later he sent again desiring very earnestly that i should
admit him to supper with me he would enter upon no subjects of
conversation but what i should lead to 

so i should have been at liberty you see to court him 

i again desired to be excused 

indeed my dear my eyes were swelled i was very low spirited and could
not think of entering all at once after the distance i had kept him at
for several days into the freedom of conversation which the utter
rejection i have met with from my relations as well as your advice has
made necessary 

he sent up to tell me that as he heard i was fasting if i would promise
to eat some chicken which mrs sinclair had ordered for supper he would
acquiesce very kind in his anger is he not 

i promised that i would can i be more preparatively condescending how
happy i'll warrant if i may meet him in a kind and forgiving humour 

i hate myself but i won't be insulted indeed i won't for all this 



letter xxxi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
tuesday may 16 


i think once more we seem to be in a kind of train but through a storm 
i will give you the particulars 

i heard him in the dining-room at five in the morning i had rested very
ill and was up too but opened not my door till six when dorcas
brought me his request for my company 

he approached me and taking my hand as i entered the dining-room i
went not to bed madam till two said he yet slept not a wink for
god's sake torment me not as you have done for a week past 

he paused i was silent 

at first proceeded he i thought your resentment of a curiosity in
which i had been disappointed could not be deep and that it would go
off of itself but when i found it was to be kept up till you knew the
success of some new overtures which you had made and which complied
with might have deprived me of you for ever how madam could i support
myself under the thoughts of having with such an union of interests 
made so little impression upon your mind in my favour 

he paused again i was still silent he went on 

i acknowledge that i have a proud heart madam i cannot but hope for
some instances of previous and preferable favour from the lady i am
ambitious to call mine and that her choice of me should not appear not
flagrantly appear directed by the perverseness of her selfish
persecutors who are my irreconcilable enemies 

more to the same purpose he said you know my dear the room he had
given me to recriminate upon him in twenty instances i did not spare
him 

every one of these instances said i after i had enumerated them 
convinces me of your pride indeed sir but not of your merit i
confess that i have as much pride as you can have although i hope it is
of another kind than that you so readily avow but if sir you have the
least mixture in yours of that pride which may be expected and thought
laudable in a man of your birth alliances and fortune you should
rather wish i will presume to say to promote what you call my pride 
than either to suppress it or to regret that i have it it is this my
acknowledged pride proceeded i that induces me to tell you sir that i
think it beneath me to disown what have been my motives for declining 
for some days past any conversation with you or visit from mr mennell 
that might lead to points out of my power to determine upon until i
heard from my uncle harlowe whom i confess i have caused to be
sounded whether i might be favoured with his interest to obtain for me
a reconciliation with my friends upon terms which i had caused to be
proposed 

i know not said he and suppose must not presume to ask what those
terms were but i can but too well guess at them and that i was to have
been the preliminary sacrifice but you must allow me madam to say 
that as much as i admire the nobleness of your sentiments in general and
in particular that laudable pride which you have spoken of i wish that i
could compliment you with such an uniformity in it as had set you as
much above all submission to minds implacable and unreasonable i hope i
may without offence say that your brother's and sister's are such as
it has above all favour and condescension to me 

duty and nature sir call upon me to make the submissions you speak of 
there is a father there is a mother there are uncles in the one case 
to justify and demand those submissions what pray sir can be pleaded
for the condescension as you call it will you say your merits either
with regard to them or to myself may 

this madam to be said after the persecutions of those relations 
after what you have suffered after what you have made me hope let me 
my dearest creature ask you we have been talking of pride what sort
of pride must his be which can dispense with inclination and preference
in the lady whom he adores what must that love 

love sir who talks of love was not merit the thing we were talking
of have i ever professed have i ever required of you professions of a
passion of that nature but there is no end of these debatings each so
faultless each so full of self 

i do not think myself faultless madam but 

but what sir would you ever more argue with me as if you were a
child seeking palliations and making promises promises of what sir 
of being in future the man it is a shame a gentleman is not of being
the man 

good god interrupted he with eyes lifted up if thou wert to be thus
severe 

well well sir  impatiently  i need only to observe that all this
vast difference in sentiment shows how unpaired our minds are so let
us 

let us what madam my soul is rising into tumults and he looked so
wildly that i was a good deal terrified let us what madam 

i was however resolved not to desert myself why sir let us resolve
to quit every regard for each other nay flame not out i am a poor
weak-minded creature in some things but where what i should be or not
deserve to live if i am not is in the question i have a great and
invincible spirit or my own conceit betrays me let us resolve to quit
every regard for each other that is more than civil this you may depend
upon i will never marry any other man i have seen enough of your sex 
at least of you a single life shall ever be my choice while i will
leave you at liberty to pursue your own 

indifference worse than indifference said he in a passion 

interrupting him indifference let it be you have not in my opinion at
least deserved that it should be other if you have in your own you
have cause at least your pride has to hate me for misjudging you 

dearest dearest creature snatching my hand with fierceness let me
beseech you to be uniformly noble civil regards madam civil regards 
 can you so expect to narrow and confine such a passion as mine 

such a passion as yours mr lovelace deserves to be narrowed and
confined it is either the passion you do not think it or i do not i
question whether your mind is capable of being so narrowed and so
widened as is necessary to make it be what i wish it to be lift up
your hands and your eyes sir in silent wonder if you please but what
does that wonder express what does it convince me of but that we are
not born for one another 

by my soul said he and grasped my hand with an eagerness that hurt it 
we were born for one another you must be mine you shall be mine  and
put his other hand round me  although my damnation were to be the
purchase 

i was still more terrified let me leave you mr lovelace said i or do
you be gone from me is the passion you boast of to be thus shockingly
demonstrated 

you must not go madam you must not leave me in anger 

i will return i will return when you can be less violent less
shocking 

and he let me go 

the man quite frighted me insomuch that when i got into my chamber i
found a sudden flow of tears a great relief to me 

in half an hour he sent a little billet expressing his concern for the
vehemence of his behaviour and prayed to see me 

i went because i could not help myself i went 

he was full of excuses o my dear what would you even you do with such
a man as this and in my situation 

it was very possible for him now he said to account for the workings of
a beginning phrensy for his part he was near distraction all last
week to suffer as he had suffered and now to talk of civil regards only 
when he had hoped from the nobleness of my mind 

hope what you will interrupted i i must insist upon it that our minds
are by no means suited to each other you have brought me into
difficulties i am deserted by every friend but miss howe my true
sentiments i will not conceal it is against my will that i must submit
to owe protection from a brother's projects which miss howe thinks are
not given over to you who have brought me into these straights not
with my own concurrence brought me into them remember that 

i do remember that madam so often reminded how can i forget it 

yet i will owe to you this protection if it be necessary in the earnest
hope that you will shun rather than seek mischief if any further
inquiry after me be made but what hinders you from leaving me cannot
i send to you the widow fretchville it is plain knows not her own
mind the people here are more civil to me every day than other but i
had rather have lodgings more agreeable to my circumstances i best know
what will suit them and am resolved not to be obliged to any body if
you leave me i will privately retire to some one of the neighbouring
villages and there wait my cousin morden's arrival with patience 

i presume madam replied he from what you have said that your
application to harlowe-place has proved unsuccessful i therefore hope
that you will now give me leave to mention the terms in the nature of
settlements which i have long intended to propose to you and which
having till now delayed to do through accidents not proceeding from
myself i had thoughts of urging to you the moment you entered upon your
new house and upon your finding yourself as independent in appearance
as you are in fact permit me madam to propose these matters to you 
not with an expectation of your immediate answer but for your
consideration 

were not hesitation a self-felt glow a downcast eye encouragement more
than enough and yet you will observe as i now do on recollection that
he was in no great hurry to solicit for a day since he had no thoughts
of proposing settlements till i had got into my new house and now in
his great complaisance to me he desired leave to propose his terms not
with an expectation of my immediate answer but for my consideration only
 yet my dear your advice was too much in my head at this time i
hesitated 

he urged on upon my silence he would call god to witness to the justice 
nay to the generosity of his intentions to me if i would be so good as
to hear what he had to propose to me as to settlements 

could not the man have fallen into the subject without this parade many
a point you know is refused and ought to be refused if leave be asked
to introduce it and when once refused the refusal must in honour be
adhered to whereas had it been slid in upon one as i may say it might
have merited further consideration if such a man as mr lovelace knows
not this who should 

but he seemed to think it enough that he had asked my leave to propose
his settlements he took no advantage of my silence as i presume men as
modest as mr lovelace would have done in a like case yet gazing in my
face very confidently and seeming to expect my answer i thought myself
obliged to give the subject a more diffuse turn in order to save myself
the mortification of appearing too ready in my compliance after such a
distance as had been between us and yet in pursuance of your advice i
was willing to avoid the necessity of giving him such a repulse as might
again throw us out of the course a cruel alternative to be reduced to 

you talk of generosity mr lovelace said i and you talk of justice 
perhaps without having considered the force of the words in the sense
you use them on this occasion let me tell you what generosity is in my
sense of the word true generosity is not confined to pecuniary
instances it is more than politeness it is more than good faith it is
more than honour it is more than justice since all of these are but
duties and what a worthy mind cannot dispense with but true generosity
is greatness of soul it incites us to do more by a fellow-creature than
can be strictly required of us it obliges us to hasten to the relief of
an object that wants relief anticipating even such a one's hope or
expectation generosity sir will not surely permit a worthy mind to
doubt of its honourable and beneficent intentions much less will it
allow itself to shock to offend any one and least of all a person
thrown by adversity mishap or accident into its protection 

what an opportunity had he to clear his intentions had he been so
disposed from the latter part of this home observation but he ran away
with the first and kept to that 

admirably defined he said but who at this rate madam can be said to
be generous to you your generosity i implore while justice as it must
be my sole merit shall be my aim never was there a woman of such nice
and delicate sentiments 

it is a reflection upon yourself sir and upon the company you have
kept if you think these notions either nice or delicate thousands of
my sex are more nice than i for they would have avoided the devious path
i have been surprised into the consequences of which surprise have laid
me under the sad necessity of telling a man who has not delicacy enough
to enter into those parts of the female character which are its glory and
distinction what true generosity is 

his divine monitress he called me he would endeavour to form his
manners as he had often promised by my example but he hoped i would
now permit him to mention briefly the justice he proposed to do me in
the terms of the settlements a subject so proper before now to have
entered upon and which would have been entered upon long ago had not
my frequent displeasure  i am ever in fault my dear   taken from him the
opportunity he had often wished for but now having ventured to lay hold
of this nothing should divert him from improving it 

i have no spirits just now sir to attend such weighty points what
you have a mind to propose write to me and i shall know what answer to
return only one thing let me remind you of that if you touch upon a
subject in which my father has a concern i shall judge by your
treatment of the father what value you have for the daughter 

he looked as if he would choose rather to speak than write but had he
said so i had a severe return to have made upon him as possibly he
might see by my looks 


 


in this way are we now a sort of calm as i said succeeding a storm 
what may happen next whether a storm or a calm with such a spirit as i
have to deal with who can tell 

but be that as it will i think my dear i am not meanly off and that
is a great point with me and which i know you will be glad to hear if
it were only that i can see this man without losing any of that dignity
 what other word can i use speaking of myself that betokens decency 
and not arrogance   which is so necessary to enable me to look up or
rather with the mind's eye i may say to look down upon a man of this
man's cast 

although circumstance have so offered that i could not take your advice
as to the manner of dealing with him yet you gave me so much courage by
it as has enabled me to conduct things to this issue as well as
determined me against leaving him which before i was thinking to do 
at all adventures whether when it came to the point i should have
done so or not i cannot say because it would have depended upon his
behaviour at the time 

but let his behaviour be what it will i am afraid with you that
should any thing offer at last to oblige me to leave him i shall not
mend my situation in the world's eye but the contrary and yet i will
not be treated by him with indignity while i have any power to help
myself 

you my dear have accused me of having modesty'd away as you phrase it 
several opportunities of being being what my dear why the wife of a
libertine and what a libertine and his wife are my cousin morden's
letter tells us let me here once for all endeavour to account for the
motives of behavior to this man and for the principles i have proceeded
upon as they appear to me upon a close self-examination 

be pleased to allow me to think that my motives on this occasion rise not
altogether from maidenly niceness nor yet from the apprehension of what
my present tormenter and future husband may think of a precipitate
compliance on such a disagreeable behaviour as his but they arise
principally from what offers to my own heart respecting as i may say 
its own rectitude its own judgment of the fit and the unfit as i would 
without study answer for myself to myself in the first place to him 
and to the world in the second only principles that are in my mind 
that i found there implanted no doubt by the first gracious planter 
which therefore impel me as i may say to act up to them that thereby
i may to the best of my judgment be enabled to comport myself worthily
in both states the single and the married let others act as they will
by me 

i hope my dear i do not deceive myself and instead of setting about
rectifying what is amiss in my heart endeavour to find excuses for habits
and peculiarities which i am unwilling to cast off or overcome 
the heart is very deceitful do you my dear friend lay mine open  but
surely it is always open before you   and spare me not if you think it
culpable 

this observation once for all as i said i thought proper to make to
convince you that to the best of my judgment my errors in matters as
well of lesser moment as of greater shall rather be the fault of my
judgment than of my will 

i am my dearest friend 
your ever obliged 
clarissa harlowe 



letter xxxii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
tuesday night may 16 


mr lovelace has sent me by dorcas his proposals as follow 

to spare a delicacy so extreme and to obey you i write and the rather
that you may communicate this paper to miss howe who may consult any of
her friends you shall think proper to have intrusted on this occasion i
say intrusted because as you know i have given it out to several
persons that we are actually married 

in the first place madam i offer to settle upon you by way of
jointure your whole estate and moreover to vest in trustees such a part
of mine in lancashire as shall produce a clear four hundred pounds a
year to be paid to your sole and separate use quarterly 

my own estate is a clear not nominnal 2000l per annum lord m 
proposes to give me possession either of that which he has in lancashire 
 to which by the way i think i have a better title than he has
himself   or that we call the lawn in hertfordshire upon my nuptials
with a lady whom he so greatly admires and to make that i shall choose a
clear 1000l per annum 

my too great contempt of censure has subjected me to much slander it
may not therefore be improper to assure you on the word of a gentleman 
that no part of my estate was ever mortgaged and that although i lived
very expensively abroad and made large draughts yet that midsummer-day
next will discharge all that i owe in the world my notions are not all
bad ones i have been thought in pecuniary cases generous it would
have deserved another name had i not first been just 

if as your own estate is at present in your father's hands you rather
choose that i should make a jointure out of mine tantamount to yours be
it what it will it shall be done i will engage lord m to write to
you what he proposes to do on the happy occasion not as your desire or
expectation but to demonstrate that no advantage is intended to be
taken of the situation you are in with your own family 

to shew the beloved daughter the consideration i have for her i will
consent that she shall prescribe the terms of agreement in relation to
the large sums which must be in her father's hands arising from her
grandfather's estate i have no doubt but he will be put upon making
large demands upon you all those it shall be in your power to comply
with for the sake of your own peace and the remainder shall be paid
into your hands and be entirely at your disposal as a fund to support
those charitable donations which i have heard you so famed for out of
your family and for which you have been so greatly reflected upon in it 

as to clothes jewels and the like against the time you shall choose
to make your appearance it will be my pride that you shall not be
beholden for such of these as shall be answerable to the rank of both 
to those who have had the stupid folly to renounce a daughter they
deserved not you must excuse me madam you would mistrust my sincerity
in the rest could i speak of these people without asperity though so
nearly related to you 

these madam are my proposals they are such as i always designed to
make whenever you would permit me to enter into the delightful subject 
but you have been so determined to try every method for reconciling
yourself to your relations even by giving me absolutely up for ever 
that you seemed to think it but justice to keep me at a distance till
the event of that your predominant hope could be seen it is now seen 
 and although i have been and perhaps still am ready to regret the
want of that preference i wished for from you as miss clarissa harlowe 
yet i am sure as the husband of mrs lovelace i shall be more ready
to adore than to blame you for the pangs you have given to a heart the
generosity or rather the justice of which my implacable enemies have
taught you to doubt and this still the readier as i am persuaded that
those pangs never would have been given by a mind so noble had not the
doubt been entertained perhaps with too great an appearance of reason 
and as i hope i shall have it to reflect that the moment the doubt shall
be overcome the indifference will cease 

i will only add that if i have omitted any thing that would have given
you farther satisfaction or if the above terms be short of what you
would wish you will be pleased to supply them as you think fit and
when i know your pleasure i will instantly order articles to be drawn up
comformably that nothing in my power may be wanting to make you happy 

you will now dearest madam judge how far all the rest depends upon
yourself 

you see my dear what he offers you see it is all my fault that he
has not made these offers before i am a strange creature to be to
blame in every thing and to every body yet neither intend the ill at
the time nor know it to be the ill too late or so nearly too late that
i must give up all the delicacy he talks of to compound for my fault 

i shall now judge how far the rest depends upon myself so coldly
concludes he such warm and in the main unobjectionably proposals 
would you not as you read have supposed that the paper would conclude
with the most earnest demand of a day i own i had that expectation so
strong resulting naturally as i may say from the premises that
without studying for dissatisfaction i could not help being dissatisfied
when i came to the conclusion 

but you say there is no help i must perhaps make further sacrifices 
all delicacy it seems is to be at an end with me but if so this man
knows not what every wise man knows that prudence and virtue and
delicacy of mind in a wife do the husband more real honour in the eye of
the world than the same qualities were she destitute of them in
himself do him as the want of them in her does him more dishonour for
are not the wife's errors the husband's reproach how justly his
reproach is another thing 

i will consider this paper and write to it if i am able for it seems
now all the rest depends upon myself 



letter xxxiii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
wednesday morning may 17 


mr lovelace would fain have engaged me last night but as i was not
prepared to enter upon the subject of his proposals intending to
consider them maturely and was not highly pleased with his conclusion 
i desired to be excused seeing him till morning and the rather as there
is hardly any getting from him in tolerable time overnight 

accordingly about seven o'clock we met in the dining-room 

i find he was full of expectation that i should meet him with a very
favourable who knows but with a thankful aspect and i immediately
found by his sullen countenance that he was under no small
disappointment that i did not 

my dearest love are you well why look you so solemn upon me will
your indifference never be over if i have proposed terms in any respect
short of your expectation 

i told him that he had very considerately mentioned my shewing his
proposals to miss howe and as i should have a speedy opportunity to send
them to her by collins i desired to suspend any talk upon that subject
till i had her opinion upon them 

good god if there was but the least loop-hole the least room for
delay but he was writing a letter to lord m to give him an account of
his situation with me and could not finish it so satisfactorily either
to my lord or to himself as if i would condescend to say whether the
terms he had proposed were acceptable or not 

thus far i told him i could say that my principal point was peace and
reconciliation with my relations as to other matters the gentleness of
his own spirit would put him upon doing more for me than i should ask or
expect wherefore if all he had to write about was to know what lord m 
would do on my account he might spare himself the trouble for that my
utmost wishes as to myself were much more easily gratified than he
perhaps imagined 

he asked me then if i would so far permit him to touch upon the happy
day as to request the presence of lord m on the occasion and to be my
father 

father had a sweet and venerable sound with it i said i should be glad
to have a father who would own me 

was not this plain speaking think you my dear yet it rather i must
own appears so to me on reflection than was designed freely at the
time for i then with a sigh from the bottom of my heart thought of my
own father bitterly regretting that i am an outcast from him and from
my mother 

mr lovelace i thought seemed a little affected at the manner of my
speaking and perhaps at the sad reflection 

i am but a very young creature mr lovelace said i  and wiped my eyes
as i turned away my face   although you have kindly and in love to me 
introduced so much sorry to me already so you must not wonder that the
word father strikes so sensibly upon the heart of a child ever dutiful
till she knew you and whose tender years still require the paternal
wing 

he turned towards the window  rejoice with me my dear since i seem to
be devoted to him that the man is not absolutely impenetrable   his
emotion was visible yet he endeavoured to suppress it approaching me
again again he was obliged to turn from me angelic something he said 
but then obtaining a heart more suitable to his wish he once more
approached me for his own part he said as lord m was so subject to
gout he was afraid that the compliment he had just proposed to make
him might if made occasion a larger suspension than he could bear to
think of and if it did it would vex him to the heart that he had made
it 

i could not say a single word to this you know my dear but you will
guess at my thoughts of what he said so much passionate love lip-deep 
so prudent and so dutifully patient at heart to a relation he had till
now so undutifully despised why why am i thrown upon such a man 
thought i 

he hesitated as if contending with himself and after taking a turn or
two about the room he was at a great loss what to determine upon he
said because he had not the honour of knowing when he was to be made the
happiest of men would to god it might that very instant be resolved
upon 

he stopped a moment or two staring in his usual confident way in my
downcast face  did i not o my beloved friend think you want a father
or a mother just then   but if he could not so soon as he wished 
procure my consent to a day in that case he thought the compliment
might as well be made to lord m as not  see my dear   since the
settlements might be drawn and engrossed in the intervenient time which
would pacify his impatience as no time would be lost 

you will suppose how i was affected by this speech by repeating the
substance of what he said upon it as follows 

but by his soul he knew not so much was i upon the reserve and so
much latent meaning did my eye import whether when he most hoped to
please me he was not farthest from doing so would i vouchsafe to say 
whether i approved of his compliment to lord m or not 

to leave it to me to choose whether the speedy day he ought to have
urged for with earnestness should be accelerated or suspended miss
howe thought i at that moment says i must not run away from this man 

to be sure mr lovelace if this matter be ever to be it must be
agreeable to me to have the full approbation of one side since i cannot
have that of the other 

if this matter be ever to be good god what words are these at this
time of day and full approbation of one side why that word
approbation when the greatest pride of all my family is that of having
the honour of so dear a creature for their relation would to heaven my
dearest life added he that without complimenting any body to-morrow
might be the happiest day of my life what say you my angel with a
trembling impatience that seemed not affected what say you for
to-morrow 

it was likely my dear i could say much to it or name another day had
i been disposed to the latter with such an hinted delay from him 

i was silent 

next day madam if not to-morrow 

had he given me time to answer it could not have been in the
affirmative you must think but in the same breath he went on or the
day after that and taking both my hands in his he stared me into a
half-confusion would you have had patience with him my dear 

no no said i as calmly as possible you cannot think that i should
imagine there can be reason for such a hurry it will be most agreeable 
to be sure for my lord to be present 

i am all obedience and resignation returned the wretch with a self-
pluming air as if he had acquiesced to a proposal made by me and had
complimented me with a great piece of self denial 

is it not plain my dear that he designs to vex and tease me proud 
yet mean and foolish man if so but you say all punctilio is at an end
with me why why will he take pains to make a heart wrap itself up in
reserve that wishes only and that for his sake as well as my own to
observe due decorum 

modesty i think required of me that it should pass as he had put it 
did it not i think it did would to heaven but what signifies
wishing 

but when he would have rewarded himself as he had heretofore called it 
for this self-supposed concession with a kiss i repulsed him with a
just and very sincere disdain 

he seemed both vexed and surprised as one who had made the most
agreeable proposals and concessions and thought them ungratefully
returned he plainly said that he thought our situation would entitle
him to such an innocent freedom and he was both amazed and grieved to be
thus scornfully repulsed 

no reply could be made be me on such a subject 

i abruptly broke from him i recollect as i passed by one of the pier-
glasses that i saw in it his clenched hand offered in wrath to his
forehead the words indifference by his soul next to hatred i heard
him speak and something of ice he mentioned i heard not what 

whether he intends to write to my lord or miss montague i cannot tell 
but as all delicacy ought to be over with me now perhaps i am to blame
to expect it from a man who may not know what it is if he does not and
yet thinks himself very polite and intends not to be otherwise i am
rather to be pitied than he to be censured 

and after all since i must take him as i find him i must that is to
say as a man so vain and so accustomed to be admired that not being
conscious of internal defect he has taken no pains to polish more than
his outside and as his proposals are higher than my expectations and
as in his own opinion he has a great deal to bear from me i will no
new offence preventing sit down to answer them and if possible in
terms as unobjectionable to him as his are to me 

but after all see you not my dear more and more the mismatch that
there is in our minds 

however i am willing to compound for my fault by giving up if that
may be all my punishment the expectation of what is deemed happiness in
this life with such a husband as i fear he will make in short i will
content myself to be a suffering person through the state to the end of
my life a long one it cannot be 

this may qualify him as it may prove from stings of conscience from
misbehaviour to a first wife to be a more tolerable one to a second 
though not perhaps a better deserving one while my story to all who
shall know it will afford these instructions that the eye is a traitor 
and ought ever to be mistrusted that form is deceitful in other words 
that a fine person is seldom paired by a fine mind and that sound
principle and a good heart are the only bases on which the hopes of a
happy future either with respect to this world or the other can be
built 

and so much at present for mr lovelace's proposals of which i desire
your opinion 


 we cannot forbear observing in this place that the lady has been
particularly censured even by some of her own sex as over-nice in her
part of the above conversations but surely this must be owing to want
of attention to the circumstances she was in and to her character as
well as to the character of the man she had to deal with for although
she could not be supposed to know so much of his designs as the reader
does by means of his letters to belford yet she was but too well
convinced of his faulty morals and of the necessity there was from the
whole of his behaviour to her to keep such an encroacher as she
frequently calls him at a distance in letter xxxiii of vol iii the
reader will see that upon some favourable appearances she blames herself
for her readiness to suspect him but his character his principles 
said she are so faulty he is so light so vain so various then 
my dear i have no guardian to depend upon in letter ix of vol iii 
must i not with such a man says she be wanting to myself were i not
jealous and vigilant 

by this time the reader will see that she had still greater reason for
her jealousy and vigilance and lovelace will tell the sex as he does
in letter xi of vol v that the woman who resents not initiatory
freedoms must be lost love is an encroacher says he loves never goes
backward nothing but the highest act of love can satisfy an indulged
love 

but the reader perhaps is too apt to form a judgment of clarissa's
conduct in critical cases by lovelace's complaints of her coldness not
considering his views upon her and that she is proposed as an example 
and therefore in her trials and distresses must not be allowed to
dispense with those rules which perhaps some others of the sex in her
delicate situation would not have thought themselves so strictly bound
to observe although if she had not observed them a lovelace would have
carried all his points 



 four letters are written by mr lovelace from the date of his last 
 giving the state of affairs between him and the lady pretty much the
 same as in hers in the same period allowing for the humour in his 
 and for his resentments expressed with vehemence on her resolution to
 leave him if her friends could be brought to be reconciled to her 
 a few extracts from them will be only given  

what says he might have become of me and of my projects had not her
father and the rest of the implacables stood my friends 


 after violent threatenings of revenge he says  

tis plain she would have given me up for ever nor should i have been
able to prevent her abandoning of me unless i had torn up the tree by
the roots to come at the fruit which i hope still to bring down by a
gentle shake or two if i can but have patience to stay the ripening
seasoning 


 thus triumphing in his unpolite cruelty he says  

after her haughty treatment of me i am resolved she shall speak out 
there are a thousand beauties to be discovered in the face in the
accent in the bush-beating hesitations of a woman who is earnest about a
subject she wants to introduce yet knows not how silly fellows 
calling themselves generous ones would value themselves for sparing a
lady's confusion but they are silly fellows indeed and rob themselves
of prodigious pleasure by their forwardness and at the same time deprive
her of displaying a world of charms which can only be manifested on
these occasions 

i'll tell thee beforehand how it will be with my charmer in this case 
she will be about it and about it several times but i will not
understand her at least after half a dozen hem ings she will be
obliged to speak out i think mr lovelace i think sir i think you
were saying some days ago still i will be all silence her eyes fixed
upon my shoe-buckles as i sit over-against her ladies when put to it
thus always admire a man's shoe-buckles or perhaps some particular
beauties in the carpet i think you said that mrs fretchville then a
crystal tear trickles down each crimson cheek vexed to have her virgin
pride so little assisted but come my meaning dear cry i to myself 
remember what i have suffered for thee and what i have suffered by thee 
thy tearful pausings shall not be helped out by me speak out love o
the sweet confusion can i rob myself of so many conflicting beauties by
the precipitate charmer-pitying folly by which a politer man  thou
knowest lovely that i am no polite man   betrayed by his own
tenderness and unused to female tears would have been overcome i will
feign an irresolution of mind on the occasion that she may not quite
abhor me that her reflections on the scene in my absence may bring to
her remembrance some beauties in my part of it an irresolution that
will be owing to awe to reverence to profound veneration and that will
have more eloquence in it than words can have speak out then love and
spare not 

hard-heartedness as it is called is an essential of the libertine's
character familiarized to the distresses he occasions he is seldom
betrayed by tenderness into a complaisant weakness unworthy of himself 


 mentioning the settlements he says  

i am in earnest as to the terms if i marry her  and i have no doubt
that i shall after my pride my ambition my revenge if thou wilt is
gratified   i will do her noble justice the more i do for such a
prudent such an excellent economist the more shall i do for myself 
but by my soul belford her haughtiness shall be brought down to own
both love and obligation to me nor will this sketch of settlements
bring us forwarder than i would have it modesty of sex will stand my
friend at any time at the very altar our hands joined i will engage
to make this proud beauty leave the parson and me and all my friends who
should be present though twenty in number to look like fools upon one
another while she took wing and flew out of the church door or window 
 if that were open and the door shut and this only by a single word 


 he mentions his rash expression that she should be his although his
 damnation was to be the purchase  

at that instant says he i was upon the point of making a violent
attempt but was checked in the very moment and but just in time to save
myself by the awe i was struck with on again casting my eye upon her
terrified but lovely face and seeing as i thought her spotless heart
in every line of it 

o virtue virtue proceeds he what is there in thee that can thus
against his will affect the heart of a lovelace whence these
involuntary tremors and fear of giving mortal offence what art thou 
that acting in the breast of a feeble woman which never before no not
in my first attempt young as i then was and frightened at my own
boldness till i found myself forgiven had such an effect upon me 


 he paints in lively colours that part of the scene between him and the
 lady where she says the word father has a sweet and venerable sound
 with it  

i was exceedingly affected says he upon the occasion but was ashamed
to be surprised into such a fit of unmanly weakness so ashamed that i
was resolved to subdue it at the instant and to guard against the like
for the future yet at that moment i more than half regretted that i
could not permit her to enjoy a triumph which she so well deserved to
glory in her youth her beauty her artless innocence and her manner 
equally beyond comparison or description but her indifference belford 
 that she could resolve to sacrifice me to the malice of my enemies and
carry on the design in so clandestine a manner and yet love her as i
do to phrensy revere her as i do to adoration these were the
recollections with which i fortified my recreant heart against her yet 
after all if she persevere she must conquer coward as she has made
me that never was a coward before 


 he concludes his fourth letter in a vehement rage upon her repulsing
 him when he offered to salute her having supposed as he owns that
 she would have been all condescension on his proposals to her  

this says he i will for ever remember against her in order to steel my
heart that i may cut through a rock of ice to hers and repay her for
the disdain the scorn which glowed in her countenance and was apparent
in her air at her abrupt departure for me after such obliging behaviour
on my side and after i had so earnestly pressed her for an early day 
the women below say she hates me she despises me and tis true she
does she must and why cannot i take their advice i will not long 
my fair-one be despised by thee and laughed at by them 

let me acquaint thee jack adds he by way of postscript that this
effort of hers to leave me if she could have been received her sending
for a coach on sunday no doubt resolving not to return if she had gone
out without me for did she not declare that she had thoughts to retire
to some of the villages about town where she could be safe and private 
have all together so much alarmed me that i have been adding to the
written instructions for my fellow and the people below how to act in
case she should elope in my absence particularly letting will know what
he shall report to strangers in case she shall throw herself upon any
such with a resolution to abandon me to these instructions i shall
further add as circumstances offer 



letter xxxiv

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
thursday may 18 


i have neither time nor patience my dear friend to answer every
material article in your last letters just now received mr lovelace's
proposals are all i like of him and yet as you do i think that he
concludes them not with the warmth and earnestness which we might
naturally have expected from him never in my life did i hear or read of
so patient a man with such a blessing in his reach but wretches of his
cast between you and me my dear have not i fancy the ardors that
honest men have who knows as your bell once spitefully said but he
may have half a dozen creatures to quit his hands of before he engages
for life yet i believe you must not expect him to be honest on this
side of his grand climacteric 

he to suggest delay from a compliment to be made to lord m and to give
time for settlements he a part of whose character it is not to know
what complaisance to his relations is i have no patience with him you
did indeed want an interposing friend on the affecting occasion which you
mention in yours of yesterday morning but upon my word were i to have
been that moment in your situation and been so treated i would have
torn his eyes out and left it to his own heart when i had done to
furnish the reason for it 

would to heaven to-morrow without complimenting any body might be his
happy day villain after he had himself suggested the compliment and
i think he accuses you of delaying fellow that he is how my heart is
wrung 

but as matters now stand betwixt you i am very unseasonable in
expressing my resentments against him yet i don't know whether i am or
not neither since it is the most cruel of fates for a woman to be
forced to have a man whom her heart despises you must at least 
despise him at times however his clenched fist offered to his
forehead on your leaving him in just displeasure i wish it had been a
pole-axe and in the hand of his worst enemy 

i will endeavour to think of some method of some scheme to get you from
him and to fix you safely somewhere till your cousin morden arrives a
scheme to lie by you and to be pursued as occasion may be given you
are sure that you can go abroad when you please and that our
correspondence is safe i cannot however for the reasons heretofore
mentioned respecting your own reputation wish you to leave him while he
gives you not cause to suspect his honour but your heart i know would be
the easier if you were sure of some asylum in case of necessity 

yet once more i say i can have no notion that he can or dare mean your
dishonour but then the man is a fool my dear that's all 

however since you are thrown upon a fool marry the fool at the first
opportunity and though i doubt that this man will be the most
ungovernable of fools as all witty and vain fools are take him as a
punishment since you cannot as a reward in short as one given to
convince you that there is nothing but imperfection in this life 

and what is the result of all i have written but this either marry 
my dear or get from them all and from him too 

you intend the latter you'll say as soon as you have opportunity 
that as above hinted i hope quickly to furnish you with and then comes
on a trial between you and yourself 

these are the very fellows that we women do not naturally hate we don't
always know what is and what is not in our power to do when some
principal point we have long had in view becomes so critical that we
must of necessity choose or refuse then perhaps we look about us are
affrighted at the wild and uncertain prospect before us and after a few
struggles and heart-aches reject the untried new draw in your horns 
and resolve to snail-on as we did before in a track we are acquainted
with 

i shall be impatient till i have your next i am my dearest friend 

your ever affectionate and faithful
anna howe 



letter xxxv

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
wednesday may 17 


i cannot conceal from you any thing that relates to yourself so much as
the enclosed does you will see what the noble writer apprehends from
you and wishes of you with regard to miss harlowe and how much at
heart all your relations have it that you do honourably by her they
compliment me with an influence over you which i wish with all my soul
you would let me have in this article 

let me once more entreat thee lovelace to reflect before it be too
late before the mortal offence be given upon the graces and merits of
this lady let thy frequent remorses at last end in one effectual
remorse let not pride and wantonness of heart ruin the fairer
prospects by my faith lovelace there is nothing but vanity conceit 
and nonsense in our wild schemes as we grow older we shall be wiser 
and looking back upon our foolish notions of the present hour our youth
dissipated shall certainly despise ourselves when we think of the
honourable engagements we might have made thou more especially if thou
lettest such a matchless creature slide through thy fingers a creature
pure from her cradle in all her actions and sentiments uniformly noble 
strict in the performance of all her even unrewarded duties to the most
unreasonable of fathers what a wife will she make the man who shall have
the honour to call her his 

what apprehensions wouldst thou have had reason for had she been
prevailed upon by giddy or frail motives for which one man by
importunity might prevail as well as another 

we all know what an inventive genius thou art master of we are all
sensible that thou hast a head to contrive and a heart to execute 
have i not called thine the plotting'st heart in the universe i called
it so upon knowledge what woulds't thou more why should it be the
most villainous as well as the most able marry the lady and when
married let her know what a number of contrivances thou hadst in
readiness to play off beg of her not to hate thee for the
communication and assure her that thou gavest them up for remorse and
in justice to her extraordinary merit and let her have the opportunity
of congratulating herself for subduing a heart so capable of what thou
callest glorious mischief this will give her room for triumph and even
thee no less she for hers over thee thou for thine over thyself 

reflect likewise upon her sufferings for thee actually at the time thou
art forming schemes to ruin her at least in her sense of the word is
she not labouring under a father's curse laid upon her by thy means and
for thy sake and wouldst thou give operation and completion to that
curse which otherwise cannot have effect 

and what lovelace all the time is thy pride thou that vainly
imaginest that the whole family of the harlowes and that of the howes
too are but thy machines unknown to themselves to bring about thy
purposes and thy revenge what art thou more or better than the
instrument even of her implacable brother and envious sister to
perpetuate the disgrace of the most excellent of sisters to which they
are moved by vilely low and sordid motives canst thou bear lovelace 
to be thought the machine of thy inveterate enemy james harlowe nay 
art thou not the cully of that still viler joseph leman who serves
himself as much by thy money as he does thee by the double part he acts
by thy direction and further still art thou not the devil's agent who
only can and who certainly will suitably reward thee if thou
proceedest and if thou effectest thy wicked purpose 

could any man but thee put together upon paper the following questions
with so much unconcern as thou seemest to have written them give them
a reperusal o heart of adamant whither can she fly to avoid me her
parents will not receive her her uncles will not entertain her her
beloved norton is in their direction and cannot miss howe dare not 
she has not one friend in town but me is entirely a stranger to the
town  what must that heart be that can triumph in a distress so deep 
into which she has been plunged by thy elaborate arts and contrivances 
and what a sweet yet sad reflection was that which had like to have had
its due effect upon thee arising from thy naming lord m for her nuptial
father her tender years inclining her to wish for a father and to hope
a friend o my dear lovelace canst thou resolve to be instead of the
father thou hast robbed her of a devil 


 see letter xxi of this volume 


thou knowest that i have no interest that i can have no view in
wishing thee to do justice to this admirable creature for thy own sake 
once more i conjure thee for thy family's sake and for the sake of our
common humanity let me beseech thee to be just to miss clarissa harlowe 

no matter whether these expostulations are in character from me or not 
i have been and am bad enough if thou takest my advice which is as
the enclosed will shew thee the advice of all thy family thou wilt
perhaps have it to reproach me and but perhaps neither that thou art
not a worse man than myself but if thou dost not and if thou ruinest
such a virtue all the complicated wickedness of ten devils let loose
among the innocent with full power over them will not do so much vile
and base mischief as thou wilt be guilty of 

it is said that the prince on his throne is not safe if a mind so
desperate can be found as values not its own life so may it be said 
that the most immaculate virtue is not safe if a man can be met with who
has no regard to his own honour and makes a jest of the most solemn vows
and protestations 

thou mayest by trick chicane and false colours thou who art worse than
a pickeroon in love overcome a poor lady so entangled as thou hast
entangled her so unprotected as thou hast made her but consider how
much more generous and just to her and noble to thyself it is to
overcome thyself 

once more it is no matter whether my past or future actions countenance
my preachment as perhaps thou'lt call what i have written but this i
promise thee that whenever i meet with a woman of but one half of miss
harlowe's perfections who will favour me with her acceptance i will
take the advice i give and marry nor will i offer to try her honour
at the hazard of my own 

in other words i will not degrade an excellent creature in her own eyes 
by trials when i have no cause for suspicion and let me add with
respect to thy eagleship's manifestation of which thou boastest in thy
attempts upon the innocent and uncorrupted rather than upon those whom
thou humourously comparest to wrens wagtails and phyl-tits as thou
callest them that i hope i have it not once to reproach myself that i
ruined the morals of any one creature who otherwise would have been
uncorrupted guilt enough in contributing to the continued guilt of other
poor wretches if i am one of those who take care she shall never rise
again when she has once fallen 


 see letter xvii of this volume 


whatever the capital devil under whose banner thou hast listed will let
thee do with regard to this incomparable woman i hope thou wilt act
with honour in relation to the enclosed between lord m and me since
his lordship as thou wilt see desires that thou mayest not know he
wrote on the subject for reasons i think very far from being
creditable to thyself and that thou wilt take as meant the honest zeal
for thy service of

thy real friend 
j belford 



letter xxxvi

lord m to john belford esq 
 enclosed in the preceding  
m hall monday may 15 


sir 

if any man in the world has power over my nephew it is you i therefore
write this to beg you to interfere in the affair depending between him
and the most accomplished of women as every one says and what every one
says must be true 

i don't know that he has any bad designs upon her but i know his temper
too well not to be apprehensive upon such long delays and the ladies
here have been for some time in fear for her lady sarah in particular 
who as you must know is a wise woman says that these delays in the
present case must be from him rather than from the lady 

he had always indeed a strong antipathy to marriage and may think of
playing his dog's tricks by her as he has by so many others if there's
any danger of this tis best to prevent it in time for when a thing is
done advice comes too late 

he has always had the folly and impertinence to make a jest of me for
using proverbs but as they are the wisdom of whole nations and ages
collected into a small compass i am not to be shamed out of sentences
that often contain more wisdom in them than the tedious harangues of most
of our parsons and moralists let him laugh at them if he pleases you
and i know better things mr belford though you have kept company with
a wolf you have not learnt to howl of him 

but nevertheless you must let him know that i have written to you on
this subject i am ashamed to say it but he has ever treated me as if i
were a man of very common understanding and would perhaps think never
the better of the best advice in the world for coming from me those 
mr belford who most love are least set by but who would expect
velvet to be made out of a sow's ear 

i am sure he has no reason however to slight me as he does he may and
will be the better for me if he outlives me though he once told me to
my face that i might do as i would with my estate for that he for his
part loved his liberty as much as he despised money and at another
time twitting me with my phrases that the man was above controul who
wanted not either to borrow or flatter he thought i suppose that i
could not cover him with my wings without pecking at him with my bill 
though i never used to be pecking at him without very great occasion 
and god knows he might have my very heart if he would but endeavour
to oblige me by studying his own good for that is all i desire of him 
indeed it was his poor mother that first spoiled him and i have been
but too indulgent to him since a fine grateful disposition you'll say 
to return evil for good but that was always his way it is a good
saying and which was verified by him with a witness children when
little make their parents fools when great mad had his parents lived
to see what i have seen of him they would have been mad indeed 

this match however as the lady has such an extraordinary share of
wisdom and goodness might set all to rights and if you can forward it 
i would enable him to make whatever settlements he could wish and should
not be unwilling to put him in possession of another pretty estate
besides i am no covetous man he knows and indeed what is a
covetous man to be likened to so fitly as to a dog in a wheel which
roasts meat for others and what do i live for as i have often said 
but to see him and my two nieces well married and settled may heaven
settle him down to a better mind and turn his heart to more of goodness
and consideration 

if the delays are on his side i tremble for the lady and if on hers 
 as he tells my niece charlotte i could wish she were apprized that
delays are dangerous excellent as she is she ought not to depend on
her merits with such a changeable fellow and such a profest marriage-
hater as he has been desert and reward i can assure her seldom keep
company together 

but let him remember that vengeance though it comes with leaden feet 
strikes with iron hands if he behaves ill in this case he may find it
so what a pity it is that a man of his talents and learning should be
so vile a rake alas alas une poignee de bonne vie vaut mieux que
plein muy de clergee a handful of good life is better than a whole
bushel of learning 

you may throw in too as a friend that should he provoke me it may
not be too late for me to marry my old friend wycherly did so when he
was older than i am on purpose to plague his nephew and in spite of
this gout i might have a child or two still i have not been without
some thoughts that way when he has angered me more than ordinary but
these thoughts have gone off again hitherto upon my considering that
the children of very young and very old men though i am not so very old
neither last not long and that old men when they marry young women 
are said to make much of death yet who knows but that matrimony might be
good against the gouty humours i am troubled with 

no man is every thing you mr belford are a learned man i am a peer 
and do you as you best know how inculcate upon him the force of these
wise sayings which follow as well as those which went before but yet so
indiscreetly as that he may not know that you borrow your darts from my
quiver these be they happy is the man who knows his follies in his
youth he that lives well lives long again he that lives ill one
year will sorrow for it seven and again as the spaniards have it who
lives well sees afar off far off indeed for he sees into eternity as
a man may say then that other fine saying he who perishes in needless
dangers is the devil's martyr another proverb i picked up at madrid 
when i accompanied lord lexington in his embassy to spain which might
teach my nephew more mercy and compassion than is in his nature i doubt
to shew which is this that he who pities another remembers himself 
and this that is going to follow i am sure he has proved the truth of a
hundred times that he who does what he will seldom does what he ought 
nor is that unworthy of his notice young men's frolics old men feel my
devilish gout god help me but i will not say what i was going to say 

i remember that you yourself complimenting me for my taste in pithy and
wise sentences said a thing that gave me a high opinion of you and it
was this men of talents  said you are sooner to be convinced by
short sentences than by long preachments because the short sentences
drive themselves into the heart and stay there while long discourses 
though ever so good tire the attention and one good thing drives out
another and so on till all is forgotten 

may your good counsel mr belford founded upon these hints which i have
given pierce his heart and incite him to do what will be so happy for
himself and so necessary for the honour of that admirable lady whom i
long to see his wife and if i may i will not think of one for myself 

should he abuse the confidence she has placed in him i myself shall
pray that vengeance may fall upon his head raro i quite forget all my
latin but i think it is raro antecedentem scelestum deseruit pede paean
claudo where vice goes before vengeance sooner or later will follow 
but why do i translate these things for you 

i shall make no apologies for this trouble i know how well you love him
and me and there is nothing in which you could serve us both more
importantly than in forwarding this match to the utmost of your power 
when it is done how shall i rejoice to see you at m hall mean time i
shall long to hear that you are likely to be successful with him and am 

dear sir 
your most faithful friend and servant 
m 


 mr lovelace having not returned an answer to mr belford's expostulary
 letter so soon as mr belford expected he wrote to him expressing
 his apprehension that he had disobliged him by his honest freedom 
 among other things he says  

i pass my time here at watford attending my dying uncle very heavily 
i cannot therefore by any means dispense with thy correspondence and
why shouldst thou punish me for having more conscience and more remorse
than thyself thou who never thoughtest either conscience or remorse an
honour to thee and i have besides a melancholy story to tell thee in
relation to belton and his thomasine and which may afford a lesson to
all the keeping-class 

i have a letter from each of our three companions in the time they have
all the wickedness that thou hast but not the wit some new rogueries
do two of them boast of which i think if completed deserve the
gallows 

i am far from hating intrigue upon principle but to have awkward
fellows plot and commit their plots to paper destitute of the
seasonings of the acumen which is thy talent how extremely shocking
must their letters be but do thou lovelace whether thou art or art
not determined upon thy measures with regard to the fine lady in thy
power enliven my heavy heart by thy communications and thou wilt oblige

thy melancholy friend 
j belford 



letter xxxvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
friday night may 19 


when i have opened my view to thee so amply as i have done in my former
letters and have told thee that my principal design is but to bring
virtue to a trial that if virtue it need not be afraid of and that
the reward of it will be marriage that is to say if after i have
carried my point i cannot prevail upon her to live with me the life of
honour for that thou knowest is the wish of my heart i am amazed at
the repetition of thy wambling nonsense 


 see vol iii letter xviii 


i am of opinion with thee that some time hence when i am grown wiser i
shall conclude that there is nothing but vanity conceit and nonsense 
in my present wild schemes but what is this saying but that i must
be first wiser 

i do not intend to let this matchless creature slide through my fingers 

art thou able to say half the things in her praise that i have said and
am continually saying or writing 

her gloomy father cursed the sweet creature because she put it out of
his wicked power to compel her to have the man she hated thou knowest
how little merit she has with me on this score and shall i not try the
virtue i intended upon full proof to reward because her father is a
tyrant why art thou thus eternally reflecting upon so excellent a
woman as if thou wert assured she would fail in the trial nay thou
declarest every time thou writest on the subject that she will that
she must yield entangled as she is and yet makest her virtue the
pretence of thy solicitude for her 

an instrument of the vile james harlowe dost thou call me o jack how
could i curse thee i am instrument of that brother of that sister 
but mark the end and thou shalt see what will become of that brother 
and of that sister 

play not against me my own acknowledged sensibilities i desire thee 
sensibilities which at the same time that they contradict thy charge of
an adamantine heart in thy friend thou hadst known nothing of had i not
communicated them to thee 

if i ruin such a virtue sayest thou eternal monotonist again the
most immaculate virtue may be ruined by men who have no regard to their
honour and who make a jest of the most solemn oaths etc what must be
the virtue that will be ruined without oaths is not the world full of
these deceptions and are not lovers' oaths a jest of hundreds of years'
standing and are not cautions against the perfidy of our sex a
necessary part of the female education 

i do intend to endeavour to overcome myself but i must first try if i
cannot overcome this lady have i not said that the honour of her sex
is concerned that i should try 

whenever thou meetest with a woman of but half her perfections thou wilt
marry do jack 

can a girl be degraded by trials who is not overcome 

i am glad that thou takest crime to thyself for not endeavouring to
convert the poor wretches whom others have ruined i will not
recriminate upon thee belford as i might when thou flatterest thyself
that thou never ruinedst the morals of any young creature who otherwise
would not have been corrupted the palliating consolation of an hottentot
heart determined rather to gluttonize on the garbage of other foul
feeders than to reform but tell me jack wouldst thou have spared such
a girl as my rosebud had i not by my example engaged thy generosity 
nor was my rosebud the only girl i spared when my power was
acknowledged who more merciful than thy friend 

 it is resistance that inflames desire 
 sharpens the darts of love and blows its fire 
 love is disarm'd that meets with too much ease 
 he languishes and does not care to please 

the women know this as well as the men they love to be addressed with
spirit 

 and therefore tis their golden fruit they guard
 with so much care to make profession hard 

whence for a by-reflection the ardent the complaisant gallant is so
often preferred to the cold the unadoring husband and yet the sex do
not consider that variety and novelty give the ardour and the
obsequiousness and that were the rake as much used to them as the
husband is he would be  and is to his own wife if married  as
indifferent to their favours as their husbands are and the husband in
his turn would to another woman be the rake let the women upon the
whole take this lesson from a lovelace always to endeavour to make
themselves as new to a husband and to appear as elegant and as obliging
to him as they are desirous to appear to a lover and actually were to
him as such and then the rake which all women love will last longer in
the husband than it generally does 

but to return if i have not sufficiently cleared my conduct to thee in
the above i refer thee once more to mine of the 13th of last month 
and pr'ythee jack lay me not under a necessity to repeat the same
things so often i hope thou readest what i write more than once 


 see vol ii letter xiv 


i am not displeased that thou art so apprehensive of my resentment that
i cannot miss a day without making thee uneasy thy conscience tis
plain tells thee that thou has deserved my displeasure and if it has
convinced thee of that it will make thee afraid of repeating thy fault 
see that this be the consequence else now that thou hast told me how i
can punish thee it is very likely that i do punish thee by my silence 
although i have as much pleasure in writing on this charming subject as
thou canst have in reading what i write 

when a boy if a dog ran away from me through fear i generally looked
about for a stone or a stick and if neither offered to my hand i
skinned my hat after him to make him afraid for something what
signifies power if we do not exert it 

let my lord know that thou hast scribbled to me but give him not the
contents of thy epistle though a parcel of crude stuff he would think
there was something in it poor arguments will do when brought in
favour of what we like but the stupid peer little thinks that this lady
is a rebel to love on the contrary not only he but all the world
believe her to be a volunteer in his service so i shall incur blame 
and she will be pitied if any thing happen amiss 

since my lord's heart is set upon this match i have written already to
let him know that my unhappy character had given my beloved an
ungenerous diffidence of me that she is so mother-sick and father-fond 
that she had rather return to harlowe-place than marry that she is even
apprehensive that the step she has taken of going off with me will make
the ladies of a family of such rank and honour as ours think slightly of
her that therefore i desire his lordship though this hint i tell him 
must be very delicately touched to write me such a letter as i can shew
her let him treat me in it ever so freely i shall not take it amiss i
tell him because i know his lordship takes pleasure in writing to me in
a corrective style that he may make what offers he pleases on the
marriage that i desire his presence at the ceremony that i may take
from his hand the greatest blessing that mortal man can give me 

i have not absolutely told the lady that i would write to his lordship to
this effect yet have given her reason to think i will so that without
the last necessity i shall not produce the answer i expect from him for
i am very loth i own to make use of any of my family's names for the
furthering of my designs and yet i must make all secure before i pull
off the mask was not this my motive for bringing her hither 

thus thou seest that the old peer's letter came very seasonably i thank
thee for that but as to his sentences they cannot possibly do me good 
i was early suffocated with his wisdom of nations when a boy i never
asked anything of him but out flew a proverb and if the tendency of
that was to deny me i never could obtain the least favour this gave me
so great an aversion to the very word that when a child i made it a
condition with my tutor who was an honest parson that i would not read
my bible at all if he would not excuse me one of the wisest books in it 
to which however i had no other objection than that it was called the
proverbs and as for solomon he was then a hated character with me not
because of his polygamy but because i had conceived him to be such
another musty old fellow as my uncle 

well but let us leave old saws to old me what signifies thy tedious
whining over thy departing relation is it not generally agreed that he
cannot recover will it not be kind in thee to put him out of his
misery i hear that he is pestered still with visits from doctors and
apothecaries and surgeons that they cannot cut so deep as the
mortification has gone and that in every visit in every scarification 
inevitable death is pronounced upon him why then do they keep
tormenting him is it not to take away more of his living fleece than of
his dead flesh when a man is given over the fee should surely be
refused are they not now robbing his heirs what has thou to do if
the will be as thou'dst have it he sent for thee  did he not   to close
his eyes he is but an uncle is he 

let me see if i mistake not it is in the bible or some other good
book can it be in herodotus o i believe it is in josephus a half-
sacred and half-profane author he tells us of a king of syria put out
of his pain by his prime minister or one who deserved to be so for his
contrivance the story says if i am right that he spread a wet cloth
over his face which killing him he reigned in his place a notable
fellow perhaps this wet cloth in the original is what we now call
laudanum a potion that overspreads the faculties as the wet cloth did
the face of the royal patient and the translator knew not how to render
it 

but how like forlorn varlet thou subscribest thy melancholy friend j 
belford  melancholy for what to stand by and see fair play between
an old man and death i thought thou hadst been more of a man that thou
art not afraid of an acute death a sword's point to be so plaugily
hip'd at the consequences of a chronical one what though the
scarificators work upon him day by day it's only upon a caput mortuum 
and pr'ythee go to to use the stylum veterum and learn of the royal
butchers who for sport an hundred times worse men than thy lovelace 
widow ten thousand at a brush and make twice as many fatherless learn
of them i say how to support a single death 

but art thou sure jack it is a mortification my uncle once gave
promises of such a root-and-branch distemper but alas it turned to a
smart gout-fit and i had the mortification instead of him i have heard
that bark in proper doses will arrest a mortification in its progress 
and at last cure it let thy uncle's surgeon know that it is worth more
than his ears if he prescribe one grain of the bark 

i wish my uncle had given me the opportunity of setting thee a better
example thou shouldst have seen what a brave fellow i had been and had
i had occasion to write my conclusion would have been this i hope the
old trojan's happy in that hope i am so and

thy rejoicing friend 
r lovelace 


dwell not always jack upon one subject let me have poor belton's
 story the sooner the better if i can be of service to him tell
 him he may command me either in purse or person yet the former with
 a freer will than the latter for how can i leave my goddess but
 i'll issue my commands to my other vassals to attend thy summons 

if ye want head let me know if not my quota on this occasion is
 money 



letter xxxviii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
saturday may 20 


not one word will i reply to such an abandoned wretch as thou hast shewn
thyself to be in thine of last night i will leave the lady to the
protection of that power who only can work miracles and to her own
merits still i have hopes that these will save her 

i will proceed as thou desirest to poor belton's case and the rather 
as it has thrown me into such a train of thinking upon our past lives 
our present courses and our future views as may be of service to us
both if i can give due weight to the reflections that arise from it 

the poor man made me a visit on thursday in this my melancholy
attendance he began with complaints of his ill health and spirits his
hectic cough and his increased malady of spitting blood and then led to
his story 

a confounded one it is and which highly aggravates his other maladies 
for it has come out that his thomasine who truly would be new
christened you know that her name might be nearer in sound to the
christian name of the man whom she pretended to doat upon has for many
years carried on an intrigue with a fellow who had been hostler to her
father an innkeeper at darking of whom at the expense of poor belton 
she has made a gentleman and managed it so that having the art to make
herself his cashier she has been unable to account for large sums which
he thought forthcoming at demand and had trusted to her custody in
order to pay off a mortgage upon his parental estate in kent which his
heart has run upon leaving clear but which now cannot be done and will
soon be foreclosed and yet she has so long passed for his wife that he
knows not what to resolve upon about her nor about the two boys he was
so fond of supposing them to be his whereas now he begins to doubt his
share in them 

so keeping don't do lovelace tis not the eligible wife a man must
keep a woman said the poor fellow to me but not his estate two
interests then my tottering fabric  pointing to his emaciated
carcass 

we do well to value ourselves upon our liberty or to speak more
properly upon the liberties we take we had need to run down matrimony
as we do and to make that state the subject of our frothy jests when we
frequently render ourselves for this of tom's is not a singular case 
the dupes and tools of women who generally govern us by arts our wise
heads penetrate not more absolutely than a wife would attempt to do 

let us consider this point a little and that upon our own principles as
libertines setting aside what is exacted from us by the laws of our
country and its customs which nevertheless we cannot get over till
we have got over almost all moral obligations as members of society 

in the first place let us consider we who are in possession of estates
by legal descent how we should have liked to have been such naked
destitute varlets as we must have been had our fathers been as wise as
ourselves and despised matrimony as we do and then let us ask
ourselves if we ought not to have the same regard for our posterity as
we are glad our fathers had for theirs 

but this perhaps is too moral a consideration to proceed therefore to
those considerations which will be more striking to us how can we
reasonably expect economy or frugality or anything indeed but riot and
waste from creatures who have an interest and must therefore have
views different from our own 

they know the uncertain tenure our fickle humours by which they hold 
and is it to be wondered at supposing them to be provident harlots that
they should endeavour if they have the power to lay up against a rainy
day or if they have not the power that they should squander all they
can come at when they are sure of nothing but the present hour and when
the life they live and the sacrifices they have made put conscience and
honour out of the question 

whereas a wife having the same family-interest with her husband lies
not under either the same apprehensions or temptations and has not
broken through of necessity at least has not those restraints which
education has fastened upon her and if she makes a private purse which
we are told by anti-matrimonialists all wives love to do and has
children it goes all into the same family at the long-run 

then as to the great article of fidelity to your bed are not women of
family who are well-educated under greater restraints than creatures 
who if they ever had reputation sacrifice it to sordid interest or to
more sordid appetite the moment they give it up to you does not the
example you furnish of having succeeded with her give encouragement
for others to attempt her likewise for with all her blandishments can
any man be so credulous or so vain as to believe that the woman he
could persuade another may not prevail upon 

adultery is so capital a guilt that even rakes and libertines if not
wholly abandoned and as i may say invited by a woman's levity disavow
and condemn it but here in a state of keeping a woman is in no danger
of incurring legally at least that guilt and you yourself have broken
through and overthrown in her all the fences and boundaries of moral
honesty and the modesty and reserves of her sex and what tie shall hold
her against inclination or interest and what shall deter an attempter 

while a husband has this security from legal sanctions that if his wife
be detected in a criminal conversation with a man of fortune the most
likely by bribes to seduce her he may recover very great damages and
procure a divorce besides which to say nothing of the ignominy is a
consideration that must have some force upon both parties and a wife
must be vicious indeed and a reflection upon a man's own choice who 
for the sake of change and where there are no qualities to seduce nor
affluence to corrupt will run so many hazards to injure her husband in
the tenderest of all points 

but there are difficulties in procuring a divorce  and so there ought  
and none says the rake in parting with a mistress whenever you suspect
her or whenever you are weary of her and have a mind to change her for
another 

but must not the man be a brute indeed who can cast off a woman whom he
has seduced  if he take her from the town that's another thing  
without some flagrant reason something that will better justify him to
himself as well as to her and to the world than mere power and
novelty 

but i don't see if we judge by fact and by the practice of all we have
been acquainted with of the keeping-class that we know how to part with
them when we have them 

that we know we can if we will is all we have for it and this leads us
to bear many things from a mistress which we would not from a wife 
but if we are good-natured and humane if the woman has art  and what
woman wants it who has fallen by art and to whose precarious situation
art is so necessary   if you have given her the credit of being called by
your name if you have a settled place of abode and have received and
paid visits in her company as your wife if she has brought you children
 you will allow that these are strong obligations upon you in the
world's eye as well as to your own heart against tearing yourself from
such close connections she will stick to you as your skin and it will
be next to flaying yourself to cast her off 

even if there be cause for it by infidelity she will have managed ill 
if she have not her defenders nor did i ever know a cause or a person
so bad as to want advocates either from ill-will to the one or pity to
the other and you will then be thought a hard-hearted miscreant and
even were she to go off without credit to herself she will leave you as
little especially with all those whose good opinion a man would wish to
cultivate 

well then shall this poor privilege that we may part with a woman if
we will be deemed a balance for the other inconveniencies shall it be
thought by us who are men of family and fortune an equivalent for
giving up equality of degree and taking for the partner of our bed and
very probably more than the partner in our estates to the breach of all
family-rule and order a low-born a low-educated creature who has not
brought any thing into the common stock and can possibly make no returns
for the solid benefits she receives but those libidinous ones which a
man cannot boast of but to his disgrace nor think of but to the shame
of both 

moreover as the man advances in years the fury of his libertinism will
go off he will have different aims and pursuits which will diminish
his appetite to ranging and make such a regular life as the matrimonial
and family life palatable to him and every day more palatable 

if he has children and has reason to think them his and if his lewd
courses have left him any estate he will have cause to regret the
restraint his boasted liberty has laid him under and the valuable
privilege it has deprived him of when he finds that it must descend to
some relation for whom whether near or distant he cares not one
farthing and who perhaps if a man of virtue has held him in the
utmost contempt for his dissolute life 

and were we to suppose his estate in his power to bequeath as he pleases 
why should a man resolve for the gratifying of his foolish humour only 
to bastardize his race why should he wish to expose his children to the
scorn and insults of the rest of the world why should he whether they
are sons or daughters lay them under the necessity of complying with
proposals of marriage either inferior as to fortune or unequal as to
age why should he deprive the children he loves who themselves may be
guilty of no fault of the respect they would wish to have and to
deserve and of the opportunity of associating themselves with proper 
that is to say with reputable company and why should he make them think
themselves under obligation to every person of character who will
vouchsafe to visit them what little reason in a word would such
children have to bless their father's obstinate defiance of the laws and
customs of his country and for giving them a mother of whom they could
not think with honour to whose crime it was that they owed their very
beings and whose example it was their duty to shun 

if the education and morals of these children are left to chance as too
generally they are for the man who has humanity and a feeling heart 
and who is capable of fondness for his offspring i take it for granted
will marry the case is still worse his crime is perpetuated as i may
say by his children and the sea the army perhaps the highway for the
boys the common for the girls too often point out the way to a worse
catastrophe 

what therefore upon the whole do we get by treading in these crooked
paths but danger disgrace and a too-late repentance 

and after all do we not frequently become the cullies of our own
libertinism sliding into the very state with those half-worn-out doxies 
which perhaps we might have entered into with their ladies at least with
their superiors both in degree and fortune and all the time lived
handsomely like ourselves not sneaking into holes and corners and when
we crept abroad with our women looking about us and at ever one that
passed us as if we were confessedly accountable to the censures of all
honest people 

my cousin tony jenyns thou knewest he had not the actively mischievous
spirit that thou belton mowbray tourville and myself have but he
imbibed the same notions we do and carried them into practice 

how did he prate against wedlock how did he strut about as a wit and a
smart and what a wit and a smart did all the boys and girls of our
family myself among the rest then an urchin think him for the airs he
gave himself marry no not for the world what man of sense would
bear the insolences the petulances the expensiveness of a wife he
could not for the heart of him think it tolerable that a woman of equal
rank and fortune and as it might happen superior talents to his own 
should look upon herself to have a right to share the benefit of that
fortune which she brought him 

so after he had fluttered about the town for two or three years in all
which time he had a better opinion of himself than any body else had 
what does he do but enter upon an affair with his fencing-master's
daughter 

he succeeds takes private lodgings for her at hackney visits her by
stealth both of them tender of reputations that were extremely tender 
but which neither had quite given up for rakes of either sex are always
the last to condemn or cry down themselves visited by nobody nor
visiting the life of a thief or of a man bested by creditors afraid to
look out of his own house or to be seen abroad with her and thus went
on for twelve years and though he had a good estate hardly making both
ends meet for though no glare there was no economy and beside he had
ever year a child and very fond of his children was he but none of
them lived above three years and being now on the death of the
dozenth grown as dully sober as if he had been a real husband his good
mrs thomas for he had not permitted her to take his own name prevailed
upon him to think the loss of their children a judgment upon the parents
for their wicked way of life  a time will come lovelace if we live to
advanced years in which reflection will take hold of the enfeebled
mind   and then it was not difficult for his woman to induce him by way
of compounding with heaven to marry her when this was done he had
leisure to sit down and contemplate an to recollect the many offers of
persons of family and fortune to which he had declined in the prime of
life his expenses equal at least his reputation not only less but
lost his enjoyments stolen his partnership unequal and such as he had
always been ashamed of but the woman said that after twelve or
thirteen years' cohabitation tony did an honest thing by her and that
was all my poor cousin got by making his old mistress his new wife not a
drum not a trumpet not a fife not a tabret nor the expectation of a
new joy to animate him on 

what belton will do with his thomasine i know not nor care i to advise
him for i see the poor fellow does not like that any body should curse
her but himself this he does very heartily and so low is he reduced 
that he blubbers over the reflection upon his past fondness for her cubs 
and upon his present doubts of their being his what a damn'd thing is
it belford if tom and hal should be the hostler dog's puppies and not
mine 

very true and i think the strong health of the chubby-faced muscular
whelps confirms the too great probability 

but i say not so to him 

you he says are such a gay lively mortal that this sad tale would
make no impression upon you especially now that your whole heart is
engaged as it is mowbray would be too violent upon it he has not he
says a feeling heart tourville has no discretion and a pretty jest 
although he and his thomasine lived without reputation in the world 
 people guessing that they were not married notwithstanding she went by
his name yet he would not too much discredit the cursed ingrate
neither 

could a man act a weaker part had he been really married and were he
sure he was going to separate from the mother of his own children 

i leave this as a lesson upon thy heart without making any application 
only with this remark that after we libertines have indulged our
licentious appetites reflecting in the conceit of our vain hearts 
both with our lips and by our lives upon our ancestors and the good old
ways we find out when we come to years of discretion if we live till
then what all who knew us found out before that is to say we found
out our own despicable folly that those good old ways would have been
best for us as well as for the rest of the world and that in every step
we have deviated from them we have only exposed our vanity and our
ignorance at the same time 

j belford 



letter xxxix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
saturday may 20 


i am pleased with the sober reflection with which thou concludest thy
last and i thank thee for it poor belton i did not think his
thomasine would have proved so very a devil but this must everlastingly
be the risk of a keeper who takes up with a low-bred girl this i never
did nor had i occasion to do it such a one as i jack needed only 
till now to shake the stateliest tree and the mellowed fruit dropt into
my mouth always of montaigne's taste thou knowest thought it a glory
to subdue a girl of family more truly delightful to me the seduction-
progress than the crowned act for that's a vapour a bubble and most
cordially do i thank thee for thy indirect hint that i am right in my
pursuit 

from such a woman as miss harlowe a man is secured from all the
inconveniencies thou expatiatest upon 

once more therefore do i thank thee belford for thy approbation a
man need not as thou sayest sneak into holes and corners and shun the
day in the company of such a woman as this how friendly in thee thus
to abet the favourite purpose of my heart nor can it be a disgrace to
me to permit such a lady to be called by my name nor shall i be at all
concerned about the world's censure if i live to the years of
discretion which thou mentionest should i be taken in and prevailed
upon to tread with her the good old path of my ancestors 

a blessing on thy heart thou honest fellow i thought thou wert in
jest and but acquitting thyself of an engagement to lord m when thou
wert pleading for matrimony in behalf of this lady it could not be
principle i knew in thee it could not be compassion a little envy
indeed i suspected but now i see thee once more thyself and once more 
say i a blessing on thy heart thou true friend and very honest fellow 

now will i proceed with courage in all my schemes and oblige thee with
the continued narrative of my progressions towards bringing them to
effect but i could not forbear to interrupt my story to show my
gratitude 



letter xl

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


and now will i favour thee with a brief account of our present situation 

from the highest to the lowest we are all extremely happy dorcas stands
well in her lady's graces polly has asked her advice in relation to a
courtship-affair of her own no oracle ever gave better sally has had
a quarrel with her woollen-draper and made my charmer lady-chancellor in
it she blamed sally for behaving tyrannically to a man who loves her 
dear creature to stand against a glass and to shut her eyes because she
will not see her face in it mrs sinclair has paid her court to so
unerring a judge by requesting her advice with regard to both nieces 

this the way we have been in for several days with the people below yet
sola generally at her meals and seldom at other times in their company 
they now used to her ways  perseverance must conquer   never press her 
so when they meet all is civility on both sides even married people i
believe jack prevent abundance of quarrels by seeing one another but
seldom 

but how stands it between thyself and the lady methinks thou askest 
since her abrupt departure from thee and undutiful repulse of wednesday
morning 

why pretty well in the main nay very well for why the dear saucy-
face knows not how to help herself can fly to no other protection and
has besides overheard a conversation  who would have thought she had
been so near   which passed between mrs sinclair miss martin and
myself that very wednesday afternoon which has set her heart at ease
with respect to several doubtful points 

such as particularly mrs fretchville's unhappy state of mind most
humanely pitied by miss martin who knows her very well the husband she
has lost and herself as sally says lovers from their cradles pity
from one begets pity from another be the occasion for it either strong
or weak and so many circumstances were given to poor mrs fretchville's
distress that it was impossible but my beloved must extremely pity her
whom the less tender-hearted miss martin greatly pitied 

my lord m s gout his only hindrance from visiting my spouse lady
betty and miss montague soon expected in town 

my earnest desire signified to have my spouse receive those ladies in
her own house if mrs fretchville would but know her own mind and i
pathetically lamented the delay occasioned by her not knowing it 

my intention to stay at mrs sinclair's as i said i had told them
before while my spouse resides in her own house when mrs fretchville
could be brought to quit it in order to gratify her utmost punctilio 

my passion for my beloved which as i told them in a high and fervent
accent was the truest that man could have for woman i boasted of it
was in short i said of the true platonic kind or i had no notion of
what platonic love was 

so it is jack and must end as platonic love generally does end 

sally and mrs sinclair next praised but not grossly my beloved 
sally particularly admired her purity called it exemplary yet to avoid
suspicion expressed her thoughts that she was rather over-nice if she
might presume to say so before me but nevertheless she applauded me for
the strict observation i made of my vow 

i more freely blamed her reserves to me called her cruel inveighed
against her relations doubted her love every favour i asked of her
denied me yet my behaviour to her as pure and delicate when alone as
when before them hinted at something that had passed between us that
very day that shewed her indifference to me in so strong a light that i
could not bear it but that i would ask her for her company to the play
of venice preserved given out for sunday night as a benefit-play the
prime actors to be in it and this to see if i were to be denied every
favour yet for my own part i loved not tragedies though she did for
the sake of the instruction the warning and the example generally given
in them 

i had too much feeling i said there was enough in the world to make
our hearts sad without carrying grief in our diversions and making the
distresses of others our own 

true enough belford and i believe generally speaking that all the men
of our cast are of my mind they love not any tragedies but those in
which they themselves act the parts of tyrants and executioners and 
afraid to trust themselves with serious and solemn reflections run to
comedies in order to laugh away compunction on the distresses they have
occasioned and to find examples of men as immoral as themselves for
very few of our comic performances as thou knowest give us good ones 
i answer however for myself yet thou i think on recollection lovest
to deal in the lamentable 

sally answered for polly who was absent mrs sinclair for herself and
for all her acquaintance even for miss partington in preferring the
comic to the tragic scenes and i believe they are right for the
devil's in it if a confided-in rake does not give a girl enough of
tragedy in his comedy 

i asked sally to oblige my fair-one with her company she was engaged 
 that was right thou'lt suppose  i asked mrs sinclair's leave for
polly to be sure she answered polly would think it an honour to
attend mrs lovelace but the poor thing was tender-hearted and as the
tragedy was deep would weep herself blind 

sally meantime objected singleton that i might answer the objection 
and save my beloved the trouble of making it or debating the point with
me and on this occasion i regretted that her brother's projects were not
laid aside since if they had been given up i would have gone in person
to bring up the ladies of my family to attend my spouse 

i then from a letter just before received from one in her father's
family warned them of a person who had undertaken to find us out and
whom i thus in writing  having called for pen and ink  described that
they might arm all the family against him  a sun-burnt pock-fretten
sailor ill-looking big-boned his stature about six foot an heavy eye 
an overhanging brow a deck-treading stride in his walk a couteau
generally by his side lips parched from his gums as if by staring at
the sun in hot climates a brown coat a coloured handkerchief about his
neck an oaken plant in his hand near as long as himself and
proportionately thick  

no questions asked by this fellow must be answered they should call me
to him but not let my beloved know a tittle of this so long as it
could be helped and i added that if her brother or singleton came and
if they behaved civilly i would for her sake be civil to them and in
this case she had nothing to do but to own her marriage and there could
be no pretence for violence on either side but most fervently i swore 
that if she was conveyed away either by persuasion or force i would
directly on missing her but one day go to demand her at harlowe-place 
whether she were there or not and if i recovered not a sister i would
have a brother and should find out a captain of a ship as well as he 

and now jack dost thou think she'll attempt to get from me do what i
will 

mrs sinclair began to be afraid of mischief in her house i was
apprehensive that she would over-do the matter and be out of character 
i therefore winked at her she primed nodded to show she took me 
twanged out a high-ho through her nose lapped one horse-lip over the
other and was silent 

here's preparation belford dost think i will throw it all away for any
thing thou canst say or lord m write no indeed as my charmer says 
when she bridles 


 


and what must necessarily be the consequence of all this with regard to
my beloved's behaviour to me canst thou doubt that it was all
complaisance next time she admitted me into her presence 

thursday we were very happy all the morning extremely happy i kissed
her charming hand i need not describe to thee her hand and arm when
thou sawest her i took notice that thy eyes dwelt upon them whenever
thou couldst spare them from that beauty spot of wonders her face fifty
times kissed her hand i believe once her cheek intending her lip but
so rapturously that she could not help seeming angry 

had she not thus kept me at arms-length had she not denied me those
innocent liberties which our sex from step to step aspire to could i
but have gained access to her in her hours of heedlessness and
dishabille  for full dress creates dignity augments consciousness and
compels distance   we had familiarized to each other long ago but keep
her up ever so late meet her ever so early by breakfast-time she is
dressed for the day and at her earliest hour as nice as others dressed 
all her forms thus kept up wonder not that i have made so little
progress in the proposed trial but how must all this distance
stimulate 

thursday morning as i said we were extremely happy about noon she
numbered the hours she had been with me all of them to be but as one
minute and desired to be left to herself i was loth to comply but
observing the sun-shine began to shut in i yielded 

i dined out returning i talked of the house and of mrs fretchville 
had seen mennell had pressed him to get the widow to quit she pitied
mrs fretchville  another good effect of the overheard conversation  had
written to lord m expected an answer soon from him i was admitted to
sup with her i urged for her approbation or correction of my written
terms she again promised an answer as soon as she had heard from miss
howe 

then i pressed for her company to the play on saturday night she made
objections as i had foreseen her brother's projects warmth of the
weather etc but in such a manner as if half afraid to disoblige me
 another happy effect of the overheard conversation  i soon got over
these therefore and she consented to favour me 

friday passed as the day before 

here were two happy days to both why cannot i make every day equally
happy it looks as if it were in my power to do so strange i should
thus delight in teasing a woman i so dearly love i must i doubt have
something in my temper like miss howe who loves to plague the man who
puts himself in her power but i could not do thus by such an angel as
this did i not believe that after her probation time shall be expired 
and if she be not to be brought to cohabitation my darling view i
shall reward her as she wishes 

saturday is half over we are equally happy preparing for the play 
polly has offered her company and is accepted i have directed her
where to weep and this not only to show her humanity  a weeping eye
indicates a gentle heart   but to have a pretence to hide her face with a
fan or handkerchief yet polly is far from being every man's girl and
we shall sit in the gallery green-box 

the woes of others so well represented as those of belvidera
particularly will be must i hope unlock and open my charmer's heart 
whenever i have been able to prevail upon a girl to permit me to attend
her to a play i have thought myself sure of her the female heart all
gentleness and harmony by nature expands and forgets its forms when
its attention is carried out of itself at an agreeable or affecting
entertainment music and perhaps a collation afterwards co-operating 

indeed i have no hope of such an effect here but i have more than one
end to answer by getting her to a play to name but one dorcas has a
master-key as i have told thee but it were worth while to carry her to
the play of venice preserved were it but to show her that there have
been and may be much deeper distresses than she can possibly know 

thus exceedingly happy are we at present i hope we shall not find any
of nat lee's left-handed gods at work to dash our bowl of joy with
wormwood 

r lovelace 



letter xli

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
friday may 19 


i would not if i could help it be so continually brooding over the dark
and gloomy face of my condition  all nature you know my dear and every
thing in it has a bright and a gloomy side  as to be thought unable to
enjoy a more hopeful prospect and this not only for my own sake but
for yours who take such generous concern in all that befalls me 

let me tell you then my dear that i have known four-and-twenty hours
together not unhappy ones my situation considered 


 she then gives the particulars of the conversation which she had
 overheard between mr lovelace mrs sinclair and miss martin but
 accounts more minutely than he had done for the opportunity she had of
 overhearing it unknown to them 

she gives the reasons she has to be pleased with what she heard from
 each but is shocked at the measure he is resolved to take if he
 misses her but for one day yet is pleased that he proposes to avoid
 aggressive violence if her brother and he meet in town  

even dorcas says she appears less exceptionable to me than before and
i cannot but pity her for her neglected education as it is matter of so
much regret to herself else there would not be much in it as the low
and illiterate are the most useful people in the common-wealth since
such constitute the labouring part of the public and as a lettered
education but too generally sets people above those servile offices by
which the businesses of the world is carried on nor have i any doubt
but there are take the world through twenty happy people among the
unlettered to one among those who have had a school-education 

this however concludes not against learning or letters since one would
wish to lift to some little distinction and more genteel usefulness 
those who have capacity and whose parentage one respects or whose
services one would wish to reward 

were my mind quite at ease i could enlarge perhaps not unusefully upon
this subject for i have considered it with as much attention as my
years and little experience and observation will permit 

but the extreme illiterateness and indocility of this maid are
surprising considering that she wants not inquisitiveness appears
willing to learn and in other respects has quick parts this confirms
to me what i have heard remarked that there is a docible season a
learning-time as i may say for every person in which the mind may be
led step by step from the lower to the higher year by year to
improvement how industriously ought these seasons as they offer to be
taken hold of by tutors parents and other friends to whom the
cultivation of the genius of children and youth is committed since once
elapsed and no foundation laid they hardly ever return and yet it
must be confessed that there are some geniuses which like some fruits 
ripen not till late and industry and perseverance will do prodigious
things but for a learner to have those first rudiments to master at
twenty years of age suppose which others are taught and they
themselves might have attained at ten what an uphill labour 

these kind of observations you have always wished me to intersperse as
they arise to my thoughts but it is a sign that my prospects are a
little mended or i should not among so many more interesting ones that
my mind has been of late filled with have had heart's ease enough to
make them 

let me give you my reflections on my more hopeful prospects 

i am now in the first place better able to account for the delays about
the house than i was before poor mrs fretchville though i know her
not i pity her next it looks well that he had apprized the women
 before this conversation with them of his intention to stay in this
house after i was removed to the other by the tone of his voice he
seemed concerned for the appearance of this new delay would have with me 

so handsomely did miss martin express herself of me that i am sorry 
methinks that i judged so hardly of her when i first came hither free
people may go a great way but not all the way and as such are generally
unguarded precipitate and thoughtless the same quickness 
changeableness and suddenness of spirit as i may call it may intervene
 if the heart be not corrupted to recover them to thought and duty 

his reason for declining to go in person to bring up the ladies of his
family while my brother and singleton continue their machinations 
carries no bad face with it and one may the rather allow for their
expectations that so proud a spirit as his should attend them for this
purpose as he speaks of them sometimes as persons of punctilio 

other reasons i will mention for my being easier in my mind than i was
before i overheard this conversation 

such as the advice he had received in relation to singleton's mate 
which agrees but too well with what you my dear wrote to me in your's
of may the 10th 


 see letter xxiii of this volume 


his not intending to acquaint me with it 

his cautions to the servants about the sailor if he should come and make
inquiries about us 

his resolution to avoid violence were he to fall in either with my
brother or this singleton and the easy method he has chalked out in
this case to prevent mischief since i need only not to deny my being
his but yet i should be driven into such a tacit acknowledgement to any
new persons till i am so although i have been led so much against my
liking to give countenance to the belief of the persons below that we
are married 

i think myself obliged from what passed between mr lovelace and me on
wednesday and from what i overheard him say to consent to go with him
to the play and the rather as he had the discretion to propose one of
the nieces to accompany me 

i cannot but acknowledge that i am pleased to find that he has actually
written to lord m 

i have promised to give mr lovelace an answer to his proposals as soon
as i have heard from you my dear on the subject 

i hope that in my next letter i shall have reason to confirm these
favourable appearances favourable i must think them in the wreck i have
suffered 

i hope that in the trial which you hint may happen between me and
myself as you express it if he should so behave as to oblige me to
leave him i shall be able to act in such a manner as to bring no
discredit upon myself in your eye and that is all now that i have to
wish for but if i value him so much as you are pleased to suppose i
do the trial which you imagine will be so difficult to me will not i
conceive be upon getting from him when the means to affect my escape
are lent me but how i shall behave when got from him and if like the
israelites of old i shall be so weak as to wish to return to my egyptian
bondage 


 see letter xxxiv of this volume 


i think it will not be amiss notwithstanding the present favourable
appearances that you should perfect the scheme whatever it be which
you tell me you have thought of in order to procure for me an asylum 
in case of necessity mr lovelace is certainly a deep and dangerous
man and it is therefore but prudence to be watchful and to be provided
against the worst lord bless me my dear how i am reduced could i
ever have thought to be in such a situation as to be obliged to stay
with a man of whose honour by me i could have but the shadow of a doubt 
 but i will look forward and hope the best 


 ibid 


i am certain that your letters are safe be perfectly easy therefore 
on that head 

mr lovelace will never be out of my company by his good will otherwise
i have no doubt that i am mistress of my goings-out and comings-in and
did i think it needful and were i not afraid of my brother and captain
singleton i would oftener put it to trial 



letter xlii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
saturday may 20 


i did not know my dear that you deferred giving an answer to mr 
lovelace's proposals till you had my opinion of them a particular hand 
occasionally going to town will leave this at wilson's that no delay
may be made on that account 

i never had any doubt of the man's justice and generosity in matters of
settlement and all his relations are as noble in their spirits as in
their descent but now it may not be amiss for you to wait to see what
returns my lord makes to his letter of invitation 

the scheme i think of is this 

there is a person whom i believe you have seen with me her name
townsend who is a great dealer in indian silks brussels and french
laces cambricks linen and other valuable goods which she has a way
of coming at duty-free and has a great vend for them and for other
curiosities which she imports in the private families of the gentry
round us 

she has her days of being in town and then is at a chamber she rents at
an inn in southwark where she keeps patterns of all her silks and much
of her portable goods for the conveniency of her london customers but
her place of residence and where she has her principal warehouse is at
depford for the opportunity of getting her goods on shore 

she was first brought to me by my mother to whom she was recommended on
the supposal of my speedy marriage that i might have an opportunity to
be as fine as a princess  was my mother's expression at a moderate
expense 

now my dear i must own that i do not love to encourage these
contraband traders what is it but bidding defiance to the laws of our
country when we do and hurting fair traders and at the same time
robbing our prince of his legal due to the diminution of those duties
which possibly must be made good by new levities upon the public 

but however mrs townsend and i though i have not yet had dealings
with her are upon a very good foot of understanding she is a sensible
woman she has been abroad and often goes abroad in the way of her
business and gives very entertaining accounts of all she has seen 

and having applied to me to recommend her to you as it is her view to
be known to young ladies who are likely to change their condition i am
sure i can engage her to give you protection at her house at deptford 
which she says is a populous village and one of the last i should
think in which you would be sought for she is not much there you will
believe by the course of her dealings but no doubt must have somebody
on the spot in whom she can confide and there perhaps you might be
safe till your cousin comes and i should not think it amiss that you
write to him out of hand i cannot suggest to you what you should write 
that must be left to your own discretion for you will be afraid no
doubt of the consequence of a variance between the two men 

but notwithstanding all this and were i sure of getting you safely out
of his hands i will nevertheless forgive you were you to make all up
with him and marry to-morrow yet i will proceed with my projected
scheme in relation to mrs townsend though i hope there will be no
occasion to prosecute it since your prospects seem to be changed and
since you have had twenty-four not unhappy hours together how my
indignation rises for this poor consolation in the courtship  courtship
must i call it   of such a woman let me tell you my dear that were you
once your own absolute and independent mistress i should be tempted 
notwithstanding all i have written to wish you to be the wife of any man
in the world rather than the wife either of lovelace or of solmes 

mrs townsend as i have recollected has two brothers each a master of
a vessel and who knows as she and they have concerns together but
that in case of need you may have a whole ship's crew at your devotion 
if lovelace give you cause to leave him take no thought for the people
at harlowe-place let them take care of one another it is a care they
are used to the law will help to secure them the wretch is no
assassin no night-murderer he is an open because a fearless enemy 
and should he attempt any thing that would make him obnoxious to the laws
of society you might have a fair riddance of him either by flight or
the gallows no matter which 

had you not been so minute in your account of the circumstances that
attended the opportunity you had of overhearing the dialogue between mr 
lovelace and two of the women i should have thought the conference
contrived on purpose for your ear 

i showed mr lovelace's proposals to mr hickman who had chambers once
in lincoln's-inn being designed for the law had his elder brother
lived he looked so wise so proud and so important upon the occasion 
and wanted to take so much consideration about them would take them home
if i pleased and weigh them well and so forth and the like and all
that that i had no patience with him and snatched them back with anger 

o dear to be so angry an't please me for his zeal 

yes zeal without knowledge i said like most other zeals if there were
no objections that struck him at once there were none 

so hasty dearest madam 

and so slow un-dearest sir i could have said but surely said i with
a look that implied would you rebel sir 

he begged my pardon saw no objection indeed but might he be allowed
once more 

no matter no matter i would have shown them to my mother i said who 
though of no inn of court knew more of these things than half the
lounging lubbers of them and that at first sight only that she would
have been angry at the confession of our continued correspondence 

but my dear let the articles be drawn up and engrossed and solemnize
upon them and there's no more to be said 

let me add that the sailor-fellow has been tampering with my kitty and
offered a bribe to find where to direct to you next time he comes i
will have him laid hold of and if i can get nothing out of him will
have him drawn through one of our deepest fishponds his attempt to
corrupt a servant of mine will justify my orders 

i send this letter away directly but will follow it by another which
shall have for its subject only my mother myself and your uncle antony 
and as your prospects are more promising than they have been i will
endeavour to make you smile upon the occasion for you will be pleased
to know that my mother has had a formal tender from that grey goose 
which may make her skill in settlements useful to herself were she to
encourage it 

may your prospects be still more and more happy prays

your own 
anna howe 



letter xliii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
sat sunday may 20 21 


now my dear for the promised subject you must not ask me how i came
by the originals  such they really are  that i am going to present you
with for my mother would not read to me those parts of your uncle's
letter which bore hard upon myself and which leave him without any title
to mercy from me nor would she let me hear but what she pleased of her's
in answer for she has condescended to answer him with a denial 
however but such a denial as no one but an old bachelor would take from
a widow 

any body except myself who could have been acquainted with such a
fal-lal courtship as this must have been had it proceeded would have
been glad it had gone on and i dare say but for the saucy daughter it
had my good mamma in that case would have been ten years the younger
for it perhaps and could i but have approved of it i should have been
considered by her as if ten years older than i am since very likely it
would have been we widows my dear know not how to keep men at a
distance so as to give them pain in order to try their love you must
advise me child you must teach me to be cruel yet not too cruel
neither so as to make a man heartless who has no time god wot to
throw away  then would my behaviour to mr hickman have been better
liked and my mother would have bridled like her daughter 

o my dear how might we have been diverted by the practisings for the
recovery of the long forgottens could i have been sure that it would
have been in my power to have put them asunder in the irish style 
before they had come together but there's no trusting to the widow
whose goods and chattels are in her own hands addressed by an old
bachelor who has fine things and offers to leave her ten thousand pounds
better than he found her and sole mistress besides of all her
notables for these as you will see by-and-by are his proposals 

the old triton's address carries the writer's marks upon the very
subscription to the equally amiable and worthy admired  there's for
you   mrs anabella howe widow the last word added i suppose as
esquire to a man as a word of honour or for fear the bella to anna 
should not enough distinguish the person meant from the spinster  vain
hussy you'll call me i know   and then follows these humbly present 
 put down as a memorandum i presume to make a leg and behave
handsomely at presenting it he intending very probably to deliver it
himself 

and now stand by to see


enter old neptune 

his head adorned with sea-weed and a crown of cockle-shells as we see
 him decked out in mrs robinson's grotto 


monday may 15 

madam 

i did make a sort of resolution ten years ago never to marry i saw in
other families where they lived best you will be pleased to mark that 
queernesses i could not away with then liked well enough to live single
for the sake of my brother's family and for one child in it more than
the rest but that girl has turned us all off the hinges and why should
i deny myself any comforts for them as will not thank me for so doing i
don't know 

so much for my motives as from self and family but the dear mrs howe
makes me go farther 

i have a very great fortune i bless god for it all of my own getting 
or most of it you will be pleased to mark that for i was the youngest
brother of three you have also god be thanked a great estate which
you have improved by your own frugality and wise management frugality 
let me stop to say is one of the greatest virtues in this mortal life 
because it enables us to do justice to all and puts it in our power to
benefit some by it as we see they deserve 

you have but one child and i am a bachelor and have never a one all
bachelors cannot say so wherefore your daughter may be the better for
me if she will keep up with my humour which was never thought bad 
especially to my equals servants indeed i don't matter being angry
with when i please they are paid for bearing it and too-too often
deserve it as we have frequently taken notice of to one another and 
moreover if we keep not servants at distance they will be familiar 
i always made it a rule to find fault whether reasonable or not that so
i might have no reason to find fault young women and servants in
general as worthy mr solmes observes are better governed by fear than
love but this my humour as to servants will not effect either you or
miss you know 

i will make very advantageous settlements such as any common friend
shall judge to be so but must have all in my own power while i live 
because you know madam it is as creditable to the wife as to the
husband that it should be so 

i am not at fine words we are not children though it is hoped we may
have some for i am a very healthy sound man i bless god for it and
never brought home from my voyages and travels a worser constitution than
i took out with me i was none of those i will assure you but this i
will undertake that if you are the survivor you shall be at the least
ten thousand pounds the better for me what in the contrary case i
shall be the better for you i leave to you as you shall think my
kindness to you shall deserve 

but one thing madam i shall be glad of that miss howe might not live
with us then  she need not know i write thus  but go home to mr 
hickman as she is upon the point of marriage i hear and if she behaves
dutifully as she should do to us both she shall be the better for i
said so before 

you shall manage all things both mine and your own for i know but
little of land-matters all my opposition to you shall be out of love 
when i think you take too much upon you for your health 

it will be very pretty for you i should think to have a man of
experience in a long winter's evening to sit down by you and tell you
stories of foreign parts and the customs of the nations he has consorted
with and i have fine curiosities of the indian growth such as ladies
love and some that even my niece clary when she was good never saw 
these one by one as you are kind to me which i make no question of 
because i shall be kind to you shall be all yours prettier
entertainment by much than sitting with a too smartish daughter 
sometimes out of humour and thwarting and vexing as daughters will 
 when women-grown especially as i have heard you often observe and
thinking their parents old without paying them the reverence due to
years when as in your case i make no sort of doubt they are young
enough to wipe their noses you understand me madam 

as for me myself it will be very happy and i am delighted with the
thinking of it to have after a pleasant ride or so a lady of like
experience with myself to come home to and but one interest betwixt us 
to reckon up our comings-in together and what this day and this week has
produced o how this will increase love most mightily will it increase
it and i believe i shall never love you enough or be able to show you
all my love 

i hope madam there need not be such maiden niceties and hangings-off 
as i may call them between us for hanging-off sake as that you will
deny me a line or two to this proposal written down although you would
not answer me so readily when i spoke to you your daughter being i
suppose hard by for you looked round you as if not willing to be
overheard so i resolved to write that my writing may stand as upon
record for my upright meaning being none of your lovelaces you will
mark that madam but a downright true honest faithful englishman so
hope you will not disdain to write a line or two to this my proposal and
i shall look upon it as a great honour i will assure you and be proud
thereof what can i say more for you are your own mistress as i am my
own master and you shall always be your own mistress be pleased to mark
that for so a lady of your prudence and experience ought to be 

this is a long letter but the subject requires it because i would not
write twice where once would do so would explain my sense and meaning
at one time 

i have had writing in my head two whole months very near but hardly knew
how being unpracticed in these matters to begin to write and now 
good lady be favourable to

your most humble lover 
and obedient servant 
ant harlowe 


 


here's a letter of courtship my dear and let me subjoin to it that if
now or hereafter i should treat this hideous lover who is so free with
me to my mother with asperity and you should be disgusted at it i
shall think you don't give me that preference in your love which you have
in mine 

and now which shall i first give you the answer of my good mamma or
the dialogue that passed between the widow mother and the pert daughter 
upon her letting the latter know that she had a love-letter 

i think you shall have the dialogue but let me promise one thing that
if you think me too free you must not let it run in your head that i am
writing of your uncle or of my mother but of a couple of old lovers no
matter whom reverence is too apt to be forgotten by children where the
reverends forget first what belongs to their own characters a grave
remark and therefore at your service my dear 

well then suppose my mamma after twice coming into my closet to me 
and as often going out with very meaning features and lips ready to
burst open but still closed as if by compulsion a speech going off in
a slight cough that never went near the lungs grown more resolute the
third time of entrance and sitting down by me thus begin 

mother i have a very serious matter to talk with you upon nancy when
you are disposed to attend to matters within ourselves and not let
matters without ourselves wholly engross you 

a good selve-ish speech but i thought that friendship gratitude and
humanity were matters that ought to be deemed of the most intimate
concern to us but not to dwell upon words 

daughter i am now disposed to attend to every thing my mamma is
disposed to say to me 

m why then child why then my dear  and the good lady's face looked
so plump so smooth and so shining   i see you are all attention 
nancy but don't be surprised don't be uneasy but i have i have 
where is it  and yet it lay next her heart never another near it so
no difficulty to have found it  i have a letter my dear  and out from
her bosom it came but she still held it in her hand  i have a letter 
child it is it is it is from from a gentleman i assure you 
 lifting up her head and smiling  

there is no delight to a daughter thought i in such surprises as seem
to be collecting i will deprive my mother of the satisfaction of making
a gradual discovery 

d from mr antony harlowe i suppose madam 

m  lips drawn closer eye raised  why my dear i cannot but own 
but how i wonder could you think of mr anthony harlowe 

d how madam could i think of any body else 

m how could you think of any body else  angry and drawing back her
face  but do you know the subject nancy 

d you have told it madam by your manner of breaking it to me but 
indeed i question not that he had two motives in his visits both
equally agreeable to me for all that family love me dearly 

m no love lost if so between you and them but this  rising  is
what i get so like your papa i never could open my heart to him 

d dear madam excuse me be so good as to open your heart to me 
i don't love the harlowes but pray excuse me 

m you have put me quite out with your forward temper  angrily sitting
down again  

d i will be all patience and attention may i be allowed to read his
letter 

m i wanted to advise with you upon it but you are such a strange
creature you are always for answering one before one speaks 

d you'll be so good as to forgive me madam but i thought every body
 he among the rest knew that you had always declared against a second
marriage 

m and so i have but then it was in the mind i was in things may
offer 

i stared 

m nay don't be surprised i don't intend i don't intend 

d not perhaps in the mind you are in madam 

m pert creature  rising again  we shall quarrel i see there's
no 

d once more dear madam i beg your excuse i will attend in silence 
 pray madam sit down again pray do  she sat down   may i see the
letter 

no there are some things in it you won't like your temper is known i
find to be unhappy but nothing bad against you intimations on the
contrary that you shall be the better for him if you oblige him 

not a living soul but the harlowes i said thought me ill-tempered and
i was contented that they should who could do as they had done by the
most universally acknowledged sweetness in the world 

here we broke out a little but at last she read me some of the passages
in the letter but not the most mightily ridiculous yet i could hardly
keep my countenance neither especially when she came to that passage
which mentions his sound health and at which she stopped she best knew
why but soon resuming 

m well now nancy tell me what you think of it 

d nay pray madam tell me what you think of it 

m i expect to be answered by an answer not by a question you don't
use to be so shy to speak your mind 

d not when my mamma commands me to do so 

m then speak it now 

d without hearing the whole of the letter 

m speak to what you have heard 

d why then madam you won't be my mamma howe if you give way to
it 

m i am surprised at your assurance nancy 

d i mean madam you will then be my mamma harlowe 

m o dear heart but i am not a fool 

and her colour went and came 

d dear madam  but indeed i don't love a harlowe that's what i
mean   i am your child and must be your child do what you will 

m a very pert one i am sure as ever mother bore and you must be
my child do what i will as much as to say you would not if you could
help it if i 

d how could i have such a thought it would be forward indeed if i
had when i don't know what your mind is as to the proposal when the
proposal is so very advantageous a one too 

m  looking a little less discomposed  why indeed ten thousand
pounds 

d and to be sure of outliving him madam 

m sure nobody can be sure but it is very likely that 

d not at all madam you was going to read something but stopped 
about his constitution his sobriety is well known why madam these
gentlemen who have used the sea and been in different climates and come
home to relax from cares in a temperate one and are sober are the
likeliest to live long of any men in the world don't you see that his
very skin is a fortification of buff 

m strange creature 

d god forbid that any body i love and honour should marry a man in
hopes to bury him but suppose madam at your time of life 

m my time of life dear heart what is my time of life pray 

d not old madam and that you are not may be your danger 

as i hope to live my dear my mother smiled and looked not displeased
with me 

m why indeed child why indeed i must needs say and then i should
choose to do nothing forward as you are sometimes to hurt you 

d why as to that madam i can't expect that you should deprive
yourself of any satisfaction 

m satisfaction my dear i don't say it would be a satisfaction but
could i do any thing that would benefit you it would perhaps be an
inducement to hold one conference upon the subject 

d my fortune already will be more considerable than my match if i am
to have mr hickman 

m why so mr hickman has fortune enough to entitle him to your's 

d if you think so that's enough 

m not but i should think the worse of myself if i desired any body's
death but i think as you say mr antony harlowe is a healthy man and
bids fair for a long life 

bless me thought i how shall i do to know whether this be an objection
or a recommendation 

d will you forgive me madam 

m what would the girl say  looking as if she was half afraid to hear
what  

d only that if you marry a man of his time of life you stand two
chances instead of one to be a nurse at your time of life 

m saucebox 

d dear madam what i mean is only that these healthy old men
sometimes fall into lingering disorders all at once and i humbly
conceive that the infirmities of age are uneasily borne with where the
remembrance of the pleasanter season comes not in to relieve the
healthier of the two 

m a strange girl yet his healthy constitution an objection just now 
 but i have always told you that you know either too much to be argued
with or too little for me to have patience with you 

d i can't but say i should be glad of your commands madam how to
behave myself to mr antony harlowe next time he comes 

m how to behave yourself why if you retire with contempt of him 
when he comes next it will be but as you have been used to do of late 

d then he is to come again madam 

m and suppose he be 

d i can't help it if it be your pleasure madam he desires a line
in answer to his fine letter if he come it will be in pursuance of
that line i presume 

m none of your arch and pert leers girl you know i won't bear them 
i had a mind to hear what you would say to this matter i have not
written but i shall presently 

d it is mighty good of you madam i hope the man will think so to
answer his first application by letter pity he should write twice if
once will do 

m that fetch won't let you into my intention as to what i shall write 
it is too saucily put 

d perhaps i can guess at your intention madam were it to become me
so to do 

m perhaps i would not make mr hickman of any man using him the worse
for respecting me 

d nor perhaps would i madam if i liked his respects 

m i understand you but perhaps it is in your power to make me
hearken or not to mr harlowe 

d young men who have probably a good deal of time before them need
not be in haste for a wife mr hickman poor man must stay his time 
or take his remedy 

m he bears more from you than a man ought 

d then i doubt he gives a reason for the treatment he meets with 

m provoking creature 

d i have but one request to make to you madam 

m a dutiful one i suppose what is it pray 

d that if you marry i may be permitted to live single 

m perverse creature i'm sure 

d how can i expect madam that you should refuse such terms ten
thousand pounds at the least ten thousand pounds a very handsome
proposal so many fine things too to give you one by one dearest
madam forgive me i hope it is not yet so far gone that rallying this
man will be thought want of duty to you 

m your rallying of him and your reverence to me it is plain have
one source 

d i hope not madam but ten thousand pounds 

m is no unhandsome proposal 

d indeed i think so i hope madam you will not be behind-hand with
him in generosity 

m he won't be ten thousand pounds the better for me if he survive me 

d no madam he can't expect that as you have a daughter and as he
is a bachelor and has not a child poor old soul 

m old soul nancy and thus to call him for being a bachelor not
having a child does this become you 

d not old soul for that madam but half the sum five thousand
pounds you can't engage for less madam 

m that sum has your approbation then  looking as if she'd be even
with me  

d as he leaves it to your generosity madam to reward his kindness to
you it can't be less do dear madam permit me without incurring your
displeasure to call him poor old soul again 

m never was such a whimsical creature  turning away to hide her
involuntary smile for i believe i looked very archly at least i
intended to do so  i hate that wicked sly look you give yourself very
free airs don't you 

d i snatched her hand and kissed it my dear mamma be not angry with
your girl you have told me that you was very lively formerly 

m formerly good lack but were i to encourage his proposals you
may be sure that for mr hickman's sake as well as your's i should
make a wise agreement 

d you have both lived to years of prudence madam 

m yes i suppose i am an old soul too 

d he also is for making a wise agreement or hinting at one at least 

m well the short and the long i suppose is this i have not your
consent to marry 

d indeed madam you have not my wishes to marry 

m let me tell you that if prudence consists in wishing well to one's
self i see not but the young flirts are as prudent as the old souls 

d dear madam would you blame me if to wish you not to marry mr 
antony harlowe is to wish well to myself 

m you are mighty witty i wish you were as dutiful 

d i am more dutiful i hope than witty or i should be a fool as well
as a saucebox 

m let me be judge of both parents are only to live for their
children let them deserve it or not that's their dutiful notion 

d heaven forbid that i should wish if there be two interests between
my mother and me that my mother postpone her own for mine or give up
any thing that would add to the real comforts of her life to oblige me 
tell me my dear mamma if you think the closing with this proposal will 

m i say that ten thousand pounds is such an acquisition to one's
family that the offer of it deserves a civil return 

d not the offer madam the chance only if indeed you have a view to
an increase of family the money may provide 

m you can't keep within tolerable bounds that saucy fleer i cannot
away with 

d dearest dearest madam forgive me but old soul ran in my head
again nay indeed and upon my word i will not be robbed of that
charming smile and again i kissed her hand 

m away bold creature nothing can be so provoking as to be made to
smile when one would choose and ought to be angry 

d but dear madam if it be to be i presume you won't think of it
before next winter 

m what now would the pert one be at 

d because he only proposes to entertain you with pretty stories of
foreign nations in a winter's evening dearest dearest madam let me
have all the reading of his letter through i will forgive him all he
says about me 

m it may be a very difficult thing perhaps for a man of the best
sense to write a love-letter that may not be cavilled at 

d that's because lovers in their letters hit not the medium they
either write too much nonsense or too little but do you call this odd
soul's letter  no more will i call him old soul if i can help it  a
love-letter 

m well well i see you are averse to this matter i am not to be
your mother you will live single if i marry i had a mind to see if
generosity govern you in your views i shall pursue my own inclinations 
and if they should happen to be suitable to yours pray let me for the
future be better rewarded by you than hitherto i have been 

and away she flung without staying for a reply vexed i dare say that
i did not better approve of the proposal were it only that the merit of
denying might have been all her own and to lay the stronger obligation
upon her saucy daughter 

she wrote such a widow-like refusal when she went from me as might not
exclude hope in any other wooer whatever it may do in mr tony harlowe 

it will be my part to take care to beat her off the visit she half-
promises to make him as you will see in her answer upon condition that
he will withdraw his suit for who knows what effect the old bachelor's
exotics  far-fetched and dear-bought you know is a proverb  might
otherwise have upon a woman's mind wanting nothing but unnecessaries 
gewgaws and fineries and offered such as are not easily to be met with 
or purchased 

well but now i give you leave to read here in this place the copy of
my mother's answer to your uncle's letter not one comment will i make
upon it i know my duty better and here therefore taking the liberty
to hope that i may in your present less disagreeable though not wholly
agreeable situation provoke a smile from you i conclude myself 

your ever affectionate and faithful 
anna howe 


mrs annabella howe to antony harly esq 

mr antony harlowe 
friday may 19 

sir 

it is not usual i believe for our sex to answer by pen and ink the first
letter on these occasions the first letter how odd is that as if i
expected another which i do not but then i think as i do not judge
proper to encourage your proposal there is no reason why i should not
answer in civility where so great a civility is intended indeed i was
always of opinion that a person was entitled to that and not to ill
usage because he had a respect for me and so i have often and often
told my daughter 

a woman i think makes but a poor figure in a man's eye afterwards and
does no reputation to her sex neither when she behaves like a tyrant to
him beforehand 

to be sure sir if i were to change my condition i know not a gentleman
whose proposal could be more agreeable your nephew and your nieces have
enough without you my daughter has a fine fortune without me and i
should take care to double it living or dying were i to do such a
thing so nobody need to be the worse for it but nancy would not think
so 

all the comfort i know of in children is that when young they do with
us what they will and all is pretty in them to their very faults and
when they are grown up they think their parents must live for them only 
and deny themselves every thing for their sakes i know nancy could not
bear a father-in-law she would fly at the very thought of my being in
earnest to give her one not that i stand in fear of my daughter
neither it is not fit i should but she has her poor papa's spirit 
a very violent one that was and one would not choose you know sir to
enter into any affair that one knows one must renounce a daughter for 
or she a mother except indeed one's heart were much in it which i
bless god mine is not 

i have now been a widow these ten years nobody to controul me and i am
said not to bear controul so sir you and i are best as we are i
believe nay i am sure of it for we want not what either has having
both more than we know what to do with and i know i could not be in the
least accountable for any of my ways 

my daughter indeed though she is a fine girl as girls go she has too
much sense indeed for one of her sex and knows she has it is more a
check to me than one would wish a daughter to be for who would choose to
be always snapping at each other but she will soon be married and
then not living together we shall only come together when we are
pleased and stay away when we are not and so like other lovers never
see any thing but the best sides of each other 

i own for all this that i love her dearly and she me i dare say so
would not wish to provoke her to do otherwise besides the girl is so
much regarded every where that having lived so much of my prime a widow 
i would not lay myself open to her censures or even to her indifference 
you know 

your generous proposal requires all this explicitness i thank you for
your good opinion of me when i know you acquiesce with this my civil
refusal  and indeed sir i am as much in earnest in it as if i had
spoken broader  i don't know but nancy and i may with your permission 
come to see your fine things for i am a great admirer of rarities that
come from abroad 

so sir let us only converse occasionally as we meet as we used to do 
without any other view to each other than good wishes which i hope may
not be lessened for this declining and then i shall always think myself

your obliged servant 
annabella howe 

p s i sent word by mrs lorimer that i would write an answer but
 would take time for consideration so hope sir you won't think it a
 slight i did not write sooner 



letter xliv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday may 21 


i am too much disturbed in my mind to think of any thing but revenge or
i did intend to give thee an account of miss harlowe's observations on
the play miss harlowe's i say thou knowest that i hate the name of
harlowe and i am exceedingly out of humour with her and with her saucy
friend 

what's the matter now thou'lt ask 

matter enough for while we were at the play dorcas who had her orders 
and a key to her lady's chamber as well as a master-key to her drawers
and mahogany chest closet-key and all found means to come at some of
miss howe's last-written letters the vigilant wench was directed to
them by seeing her lady take a letter out of her stays and put it to the
others before she went out with me afraid as the women upbraidingly
tell me that i should find it there 

dorcas no sooner found them than she assembled three ready writers of
the non-apparents and sally and she and they employed themselves with
the utmost diligence in making extracts according to former directions 
from these cursed letters for my use cursed may i well call them 
such abuses such virulence o this little fury miss howe well might
her saucy friend who has been equally free with me or the occasion
could not have been given be so violent as she lately was at my
endeavouring to come at one of these letters 

i was sure that this fair-one at so early an age with a constitution
so firm health so blooming eyes so sparkling expectations therefore so
lively and hope so predominating could not be absolutely and from her
own vigilance so guarded and so apprehensive as i have found her to
be 

sparkling eyes jack when the poetical tribe have said all they can for
them are an infallible sign of a rogue or room for a rogue in the
heart 

thou mayest go on with thy preachments and lord m with his wisdom of
nations i am now more assured of her than ever and now my revenge is
up and joined with my love all resistance must fall before it and
most solemnly do i swear that miss howe shall come in for her snack 

and here just now is another letter brought from the same little
virulent devil i hope to procure scripts from that too very speedily 
if it be put to the test for the saucy fair-one is resolved to go to
church this morning no so much from a spirit of devotion i have reason
to think as to try whether she can go out without check controul or
my attention 


 


i have been denied breakfasting with her indeed she was a little
displeased with me last night because on our return from the play i
obliged her to pass the rest of the night with the women and me in their
parlour and to stay till near one she told me at parting that she
expected to have the whole next day to herself i had not read the
extracts then so i had resolved to begin a new course and if possible 
to banish all jealousy and suspicion from her heart and yet i had no
reason to be much troubled at her past suspicions since if a woman will
continue with a man whom she suspects when she can get from him or
thinks she can i am sure it is a very hopeful sign 


 


she is gone slipt down before i was aware she had ordered a chair on
purpose to exclude my personal attendance but i had taken proper
precautions will attended her by consent peter the house-servant 
was within will s call 

i had by dorcas represented her danger from singleton in order to
dissuade her from going at all unless she allowed me to attend her but
i was answered with her usual saucy smartness that if there were no
cause of fear of being met with at the playhouse when there were but two
playhouses surely there was less at church when there were so many
churches the chairmen were ordered to carry her to st james's church 

but she would not be so careless of obliging me if she knew what i have
already come at and how the women urge me on for they are continually
complaining of the restraint they lie under in their behaviour in their
attendance neglecting all their concerns in the front house and keeping
this elegant back one entirely free from company that she may have no
suspicion of them they doubt not my generosity they say but why for
my own sake in lord m s style should i make so long a harvest of so
little corn 

women ye reason well i think i will begin my operations the moment she
comes in 


 


i have come at the letter brought her from miss howe to-day plot 
conjuration sorcery witchcraft all going forward i shall not be able
to see this miss harlowe with patience as the nymphs below ask so do
i why is night necessary and sally and polly upbraidingly remind me of
my first attempts upon themselves yet force answers not my end and yet
it may if there be truth in that part of the libertine's creed that
once subdued is always subdued and what woman answers affirmatively to
the question 


 


she is returned but refuses to admit me and insists upon having the day
to herself dorcas tells me that she believes her denial is from
motives of piety oons jack is there impiety in seeing me would it
not be the highest act of piety to reclaim me and is this to be done by
her refusing to see me when she is in a devouter frame than usual but i
hate her hate her heartily she is old ugly and deformed but o the
blasphemy yet she is a harlowe and i do and can hate her for that 

but since i must not see her  she will be mistress of her own will and
of her time truly   let me fill up my time by telling thee what i have
come at 


the first letter the women met with is dated april 27 where can she
have put the preceding ones it mentions mr hickman as a busy fellow
between them hickman had best take care of himself she says in it i
hope you have no cause to repent returning my norris it is forthcoming
on demand  now what the devil can this mean her norris forthcoming
on demand the devil take me if i am out-norris'd if such innocents
can allow themselves to plot to norris well may i 


 see vol iv letter ii 


she is sorry that her hannah can't be with her  and what if she
could what could hannah do for her in such a house as this 

the women in the house are to be found out in one breakfasting  the
women are enraged at both the correspondents for this and more than ever
make a point of my subduing her i had a good mind to give miss howe to
them in full property say but the word jack and it shall be done 

she is glad that miss harlowe had thoughts of taking me at my word she
wondered i did not offer again  advises her if i don't soon not to
stay with me  cautions her to keep me at a distance not to permit
the least familiarity  see jack see belford exactly as i thought 
her vigilance all owing to a cool friend who can sit down quietly and
give that advice which in her own case she could not take what an
encouragement to me to proceed in my devices when i have reason to think
that my beloved's reserves are owing more to miss howe's cautions than to
her own inclinations but it is my interest to be honest  miss howe
tells her interest fools i thought these girls knew that my
interest was ever subservient to my pleasure 

what would i give to come at the copies of the letters to which those of
miss howe are answers 

the next letter is dated may 3 in this the little termagant expresses
her astonishment that her mother should write to miss harlowe to forbid
her to correspond with her daughter mr hickman she says is of
opinion that she ought not to obey her mother  how the creeping
fellow trims between both i am afraid that i must punish him as well
as this virago and i have a scheme rumbling in my head that wants but
half an hour's musing to bring into form that will do my business upon
both i cannot bear that the parental authority should be thus
despised thus trampled under foot but observe the vixen 'tis well he
is of her opinion for her mother having set her up she must have
somebody to quarrel with  could a lovelace have allowed himself a
greater license this girl's a devilish rake in her heart had she been
a man and one of us she'd have outdone us all in enterprise and spirit 


 see vol iv letter x 


she wants but very little farther provocation  she says to fly
privately to london and if she does she will not leave her till she
sees her either honourably married or quit of the wretch  here jack 
the transcriber sally has added a prayer for the lord's sake dear mr 
lovealce get this fury to london  her fate i can tell thee jack if
we had her among us should not be so long deciding as her friend's 
what a gantelope would she run when i had done with her among a dozen
of her own pitiless sex whom my charmer shall never see but more of
this anon 

i find by this letter that my saucy captive has been drawing the
characters of every varlet of ye nor am i spared in it more than you 
the man's a fool to be sure my dear  let me perish if they either
of them find me one a silly fellow at least  cursed contemptible 
i see not but they are a set of infernals  there's one for thee 
lovelace and yet she would have her friend marry a beelzebub and what
have any of us done within the knowledge of miss harlowe that she
should give such an account of us as should excuse so much abuse from
miss howe but the occasion that shall warrant this abuse is to come 

she blames her for not admitting miss partington to her bed watchful 
as you are what could have happened if violence were intended he
would not stay for the night  i am ashamed to have this hinted to me by
this virago sally writes upon this hint see sir what is expected
from you an hundred and an hundred times have we told you of this  
and so they have but to be sure the advice from them was not half the
efficacy as it will be from miss howe you might have sat up after her 
or not gone to bed  proceeds she 

but can there be such apprehensions between them yet the one advise her
to stay and the other resolve to wait my imperial motion for marriage 
i am glad i know that 

she approves of my proposal of mrs fretchville's house she puts her
upon expecting settlements upon naming a day and concludes with
insisting upon her writing notwithstanding her mother's prohibitions 
or bids her take the consequence  undutiful wretches how i long to
vindicate against them both the insulted parental character 

thou wilt say to thyself by this time and can this proud and insolent
girl be the same miss howe who sighed for an honest sir george colmar 
and who but for this her beloved friend would have followed him in all
his broken fortunes when he was obliged to quit the kingdom 

yes she is the very same and i always found in others as well as in
myself that a first passion thoroughly subdued made the conqueror of it
a rover the conqueress a tyrant 

well but now comes mincing in a letter from one who has the honour of
dear miss howe's commands' to acquaint miss harlowe that miss howe is
excessively concerned for the concern she has given her 


 see vol iv letter xii 


i have great temptations on this occasion  says the prim gothamite 
to express my own resentments upon your present state 

my own resentments  and why did he not fall into this temptation 
 why truly because he knew not what that state was which gave him so
tempting a subject only by a conjecture and so forth 

he then dances in his style as he does in his gait to be sure to be
sure he must have made the grand tour and come home by way of
tipperary 

and being moreover forbid  says the prancer to enter into the cruel
subject  this prohibition was a mercy to thee friend hickman but why
cruel subject if thou knowest not what it is but conjecturest only from
the disturbance it gives to a girl that is her mother's disturbance 
will be thy disturbance and the disturbance in turn of every body with
whom she is intimately acquainted unless i have the humbling of her 

in another letter the little fury professes that she will write and
that no man shall write for her  as if some medium of that kind had been
proposed she approves of her fair friend's intention to leave me if
she can be received by her relations i am a wretch a foolish wretch 
she hates me for my teasing ways she has just made an acquaintance with
one who knows a vast deal of my private history  a curse upon her and
upon her historiographer the man is really a villain an execrable
one  devil take her had i a dozen lives i might have forfeited them
all twenty crimes ago  an odd way of reckoning jack 


 see letter xxiii of this volume 


miss betterton miss lockyer are named the man she irreverently
repeats she again calls a villain let me perish i repeat if i am
called a villain for nothing she will have her uncle  as miss harlowe
requests sounded about receiving her dorcas is to be attached to her
interest my letters are to be come at by surprise or trick' 

what thinkest thou of this jack 

miss howe is alarmed at my attempt to come at a letter of hers 

were i to come at the knowledge of her freedoms with my character  she
says she should be afraid to stir out without a guard  i would advise
the vixen to get her guard ready 

i am at the head of a gang of wretches   thee jack and thy brother
varlets she owns she means   who join together to betray innocent
creatures and to support one another in their villanies  what sayest
thou to this belford 

she wonders not at her melancholy reflections for meeting me for being
forced upon me and tricked by me  i hope jack thou'lt have done
preaching after this 

but she comforts her that she will be both a warning and an example to
all her sex  i hope the sex will thank me for this 

the nymphs had not time they say to transcribe all that was worthy of
my resentment in this letter so i must find an opportunity to come at it
myself noble rant they say it contains but i am a seducer and a
hundred vile fellows in it and the devil it seems took possession
of my heart and of the hearts of all her friends in the same dark hour 
in order to provoke her to meet me  again there is a fate in her
error  she says why then should she grieve adversity is her shining
time  and i can't tell what yet never to thank the man to whom she owes
the shine 

in the next letter wicked as i am she fears i must be her lord and
master 


 see letter xxix of this volume 


i hope so 

she retracts what she said against me in her last my behaviour to my
rosebud miss harlowe to take possession of mrs fretchville's house i
to stay at mrs sinclair's the stake i have in my country my
reversions my economy my person my address  something like in all
this   are brought in my favour to induce her now not to leave me how
do i love to puzzle these long-sighted girls 

yet my teasing ways  it seems are intolerable  are women only to
tease i trow the sex may thank themselves for teaching me to out-tease
them so the headstrong charles xii of sweden taught the czar peter to
beat him by continuing a war with the muscovites against the ancient
maxims of his kingdom 

may eternal vengeance pursue the villain  thank heaven she does not
say overtake   if he give room to doubt his honour  women can't swear 
jack sweet souls they can only curse 

i am said to doubt her love have i not reason and she to doubt my
ardour ardour jack why tis very right women as miss howe says 
and as every rake knows love ardours 

she apprizes her of the ill success of the application made to her
uncle  by hickman no doubt i must have this fellow's ears in my
pocket very quickly i believe 

she says she is equally shocked and enraged against all her family 
mrs norton's weight has been tried upon mrs harlowe as well as mr 
hickman's upon the uncle but never were there  says the vixen such
determined brutes in the world her uncle concludes her ruined already 
is not that a call upon me as well as a reproach they all expected
applications from her when in distress but were resolved not to stir an
inch to save her life  miss howe is concerned  she tells her for
the revenge my pride may put me upon taking for the distance she has kept
me at' and well she may it is now evident to her that she must be
mine for her cousin morden it seems is set against her too an act of
necessity of convenience thy friend jack to be already made a
woman's convenience is this to be borne by a lovelace 

i shall make great use of this letter from miss howe's hints of what
passed between her uncle harlowe and hickman  it must be hickman   i can
give room for my invention to play for she tells her that she will not
reveal all  i must endeavour to come at this letter myself i must
have the very words extracts will not do this letter when i have it 
must be my compass to steer by 

the fire of friendship then blazes and crackles i never before imagined
that so fervent a friendship could subsist between two sister-beauties 
both toasts but even here it may be inflamed by opposition and by that
contradiction which gives vigour to female spirits of a warm and romantic
turn 

she raves about coming up if by doing so she could prevent so noble a
creature from stooping too low or save her from ruin  one reed to
support another i think i will contrive to bring her up 

how comes it to pass that i cannot help being pleased with this virago's
spirit though i suffer by it had i her but here i'd engage in a
week's time to teach her submission without reserve what pleasure
should i have in breaking such a spirit i should wish for her but for
one month i think she would be too tame and spiritless for me after
that how sweetly pretty to see the two lovely friends when humbled and
tame both sitting in the darkest corner of a room arm in arm weeping
and sobbing for each other and i their emperor their then acknowledged
emperor reclined at my ease in the same room uncertain to which i
should first grand signor like throw out my handkerchief 

again mind the girl she is enraged at the harlowes  she is angry at
her own mother  she is exasperated against her foolish and low-vanity'd
lovelace  foolish a little toad  god forgive me for calling such a
virtuous girl a toad   let us stoop to lift the wretch out of his dirt 
though we soil our fingers in doing it he has not been guilty of direct
indecency to you  it seems extraordinary to miss howe that i have not 
 nor dare he  she should be sure of that if women have such things
in their heads why should not i in my heart not so much of a devil as
that comes to neither such villainous intentions would have shown
themselves before now if i had them lord help them 

she then puts her friend upon urging for settlements license and so
forth no room for delicacy now  she says and tells her what she
shall say to bring all forward from me  is it not as clear to thee 
jack as it is to me that i should have carried my point long ago but
for this vixen she reproaches her for having modesty'd away as she
calls it more than one opportunity that she ought not to have slipt 
thus thou seest that the noblest of the sex mean nothing in the world
by their shyness and distance but to pound the poor fellow they dislike
not when he comes into their purlieus 

though tricked into this man's power  she tells her she is not meanly
subjugated to it  there are hopes of my reformation it seems from my
reverence for her since before her i never had any reverence for what
was good  i am a great a specious deceiver  i thank her for this 
however a good moral use she says may be made of my having prevailed
upon her to swerve  i am glad that any good may flow from my actions 

annexed to this letter is a paper the most saucy that ever was written of
a mother by a daughter there are in it such free reflections upon
widows and bachelors that i cannot but wonder how miss howe came by her
learning sir george colmar i can tell thee was a greater fool than
thy friend if she had it all for nothing 

the contents of this paper acquaint miss harlowe that her uncle antony
has been making proposals of marriage to her mother 

the old fellow's heart ought to be a tough one if he succeed or she who
broke that of a much worthier man the late mr howe will soon get rid
of him 

but be this as it may the stupid family is made more irreconcilable than
ever to their goddess-daughter for old antony's thoughts of marrying so
i am more secure of her than ever and yet i believe at last that my
tender heart will be moved in her favour for i did not wish that she
should have nothing but persecution and distress but why loves she the
brutes as miss howe justly calls them so much me so little 

i have still more unpardonable transcripts from other letters 



letter xlv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


the next letter is of such a nature that i dare say these proud rouges
would not have had it fall into my hands for the world 


 see letter xxxiv of this volume 


i see by it to what her displeasure with me in relation to my proposals 
was owing they were not summed up it seems with the warmth with the
ardour which she had expected 

this whole letter was transcribed by dorcas to whose lot it fell thou
shalt have copies of them all at full length shortly 

men of our cast  this little devil says she fancies cannot have the
ardours that honest men have  miss howe has very pretty fancies jack 
charming girl would to heaven i knew whether my fair-one answers her as
freely as she writes twould vex a man's heart that this virago should
have come honestly by her fancies 

who knows but i may have half a dozen creatures to get off my hands 
before i engage for life yet lest this should mean me a compliment as
if i would reform she adds her belief that she must not expect me to
be honest on this side my grand climacteric  she has an high opinion of
her sex to think they can charm so long a man so well acquainted with
their identicalness 

he to suggest delays  she says from a compliment to be made to lord
m  yes i my dear because a man has not been accustomed to be
dutiful must he never be dutiful in so important a case as this too 
the hearts of his whole family are engaged in it you did indeed 
says she want an interposing friend but were i to have been in your
situation i would have torn his eyes out and left it to his heart to
furnish the reason for it  see see what sayest thou to this jack 

villain fellow that he is  follow and for what only for wishing
that the next day were to be my happy one and for being dutiful to my
nearest relation 

it is the cruelest of fates  she says for a woman to be forced to
have a man whom her heart despises  that is what i wanted to be sure
of i was afraid that my beloved was too conscious of her talents of
her superiority i was afraid that she indeed despises me and i cannot
bear to think that she does but belford i do not intend that this
lady shall be bound down to so cruel a fate let me perish if i marry a
woman who has given her most intimate friend reason to say she despises
me a lovelace to be despised jack 

his clenched fist to his forehead on your leaving him in just
displeasure' that is when she was not satisfied with my ardours if it
please ye i remember the motion but her back was towards me at the
time are these watchful ladies all eye but observe what follows i
wish it had been a poll-axe and in the hands of his worst enemy  


 she tells miss howe that she saw this motion in the pier-glass see
letter xxxiii of this volume 


i will have patience jack i will have patience my day is at hand 
then will i steel my heart with these remembrances 

but here is a scheme to be thought of in order to get my fair prize out
of my hands in case i give her reason to suspect me 

this indeed alarms me now the contention becomes arduous now wilt
thou not wonder if i let loose my plotting genius upon them both i
will not be out-norris'd belford 

but once more she has no notion  she says that i can or dare to mean
her dishonour but then the man is a fool that's all  i should indeed
be a fool to proceed as i do and mean matrimony however since you
are thrown upon a fool  says she marry the fool at the first
opportunity and though i doubt that this man will be the most
unmanageable of fools as all witty and vain fools are take him as a
punishment since you cannot as a reward  is there any bearing this 
belford 

but such men as myself are the men that women do not naturally hate 
 true as the gospel jack the truth is out at last have i not always
told thee so sweet creatures and true christians these young girls 
they love their enemies but rakes in their hearts all of them like
turns to like that's the thing were i not well assured of the truth of
this observation of the vixen i should have thought it worth while if
not to be a good man to be more of an hypocrite than i found it needful
to be 

but in the letter i came at to-day while she was at church her scheme
is further opened and a cursed one it is 


 mr lovelace then transcribes from his short-hand notes that part of
 miss howe's letter which relates to the design of engaging mrs 
 townsend in case of necessity to give her protection till colonel
 morden come and repeats his vows of revenge especially for these
 words that should he attempt any thing that would make him obnoxious
 to the laws of society she might have a fair riddance of him either
 by flight or the gallows no matter which  he then adds  


 see letter xlii of this volume 


tis my pride to subdue girls who know too much to doubt their knowledge 
and to convince them that they know too little to defend themselves
from the inconveniencies of knowing too much 

how passion drives a man on proceeds he i have written a prodigious
quantity in a very few hours now my resentments are warm i will see 
and perhaps will punish this proud this double-armed beauty i have
sent to tell her that i must be admitted to sup with her we have
neither of us dined she refused to drink tea in the afternoon and i
believe neither of us will have much stomach to our supper 



letter xlvi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
sunday morning seven o'clock 


i was at the play last night with mr lovelace and miss horton it is 
you know a deep and most affecting tragedy in the reading you have my
remarks upon it in the little book you made me write upon the principal
acting-plays you will not wonder that miss horton as well as i was
greatly moved at the representation when i tell you and have some
pleasure in telling you that mr lovelace himself was very sensibly
touched with some of the most affecting scenes i mention this in praise
of the author's performance for i take mr lovelace to be one of the
most hard-hearted men in the world upon my word my dear i do 

his behaviour however on this occasion and on our return was
unexceptionable only that he would oblige me to stay to supper with the
women below when we came back and to sit up with him and them till near
one o'clock this morning i was resolved to be even with him and indeed
i am not very sorry to have the pretence for i love to pass the sundays
by myself 

to have the better excuse to avoid his teasing i am ready dressed to go
to church this morning i will go only to st james's church and in a
chair that i may be sure i can go out and come in when i please without
being intruded upon by him as i was twice before 


 

near nine o'clock 

i have your kind letter of yesterday he knows i have and i shall
expect that he will be inquisitive next time i see him after your
opinions of his proposals i doubted not your approbation of them and
had written an answer on that presumption which is ready for him he
must study for occasions of procrastination and to disoblige me if now
any thing happens to set us at variance again 

he is very importunate to see me he has desired to attend me to church 
he is angry that i have declined to breakfast with him i am sure that i
should not have been at my own liberty if i had i bid dorcas tell him 
that i desired to have this day to myself i would see him in the
morning as early as he pleased she says she knows not what ails him 
but that he is out of humour with every body 

he has sent again in a peremptory manner he warns me of singleton i
sent him word that if he was not afraid of singleton at the playhouse
last night i need not at church to-day so many churches to one
playhouse i have accepted of his servant's proposed attendance but he
is quite displeased it seems i don't care i will not be perpetually
at his insolent beck adieu my dear till i return the chair waits 
he won't stop me sure as i go down to it 


 


i did not see him as i went down he is it seems excessively out of
humour dorcas says not with me neither she believes but something
has vexed him this is perhaps to make me dine with him but i will
not if i can help it i shan't get rid of him for the rest of the day 
if i do 


 


he was very earnest to dine with me but i was resolved to carry this
one small point and so denied to dine myself and indeed i was
endeavouring to write to my cousin morden and had begun three different
times without being able to please myself 

he was very busy in writing dorcas says and pursued it without dining 
because i denied him my company 

he afterwards demanded as i may say to be admitted to afternoon-tea with
me and appealed by dorcas to his behaviour to me last night as if i
sent him word by her he thought he had a merit in being unexceptionable 
however i repeated my promise to meet him as early as he pleased in the
morning or to breakfast with him 

dorcas says he raved i heard him loud and i heard his servant fly from
him as i thought you my dearest friend say in one of yours that
you must have somebody to be angry at when your mother sets you up i
should be very loth to draw comparisons but the workings of passion 
when indulged are but too much alike whether in man or woman 


 see letter x of this volume parag 2 


 


he has just sent me word that he insists upon supping with me as we
had been in a good train for several days past i thought it not prudent
to break with him for little matters yet to be in a manner 
threatened into his will i know not how to bear that 

while i was considering he came up and tapping at my door told me in
a very angry tone he must see me this night he could not rest till he
had been told what he had done to deserve the treatment i gave him 

treatment i gave him a wretch yet perhaps he has nothing new to say to
me i shall be very angry with him 


 


 as the lady could not know what mr lovelace's designs were nor the
 cause of his ill humour it will not be improper to pursue the subject
 from his letter 

having described his angry manner of demanding in person her company at
 supper he proceeds as follows  

'tis hard answered the fair perverse that i am to be so little my own
mistress i will meet you in the dining-room half an hour hence 

i went down to wait the half hour all the women set me hard to give
her cause for this tyranny they demonstrated as well from the nature
of the sex as of the case that i had nothing to hope for from my
tameness and could meet with no worse treatment were i to be guilty of
the last offence they urge me vehemently to try at least what effect
some greater familiarities than i had ever taken with her would have and
their arguments being strengthened by my just resentments on the
discoveries i had made i was resolved to take some liberties as they
were received to take still greater and lay all the fault upon her
tyranny in this humour i went up and never had paralytic so little
command of his joints as i had while i walked about the dining-room 
attending her motions 

with an erect mien she entered her face averted her lovely bosom
swelling and the more charmingly protuberant for the erectness of her
mien o jack that sullenness and reserve should add to the charms of
this haughty maid but in every attitude in every humour in every
gesture is beauty beautiful by her averted face and indignant aspect 
i saw the dear insolent was disposed to be angry but by the fierceness
of mine as my trembling hand seized hers i soon made fear her
predominant passion and yet the moment i beheld her my heart was
dastardized and my reverence for the virgin purity so visible in her
whole deportment again took place surely belford this is an angel 
and yet had she not been known to be a female they would not from
babyhood have dressed her as such nor would she but upon that
conviction have continued the dress 

let me ask you madam i beseech you tell me what i have done to
deserve this distant treatment 

and let me ask you mr lovelace why are my retirements to be thus
invaded what can you have to say to me since last night that i went
with you so much against my will to the play and after sitting up with
you equally against my will till a very late hour 

this i have to say madam that i cannot bear to be kept at this
distance from you under the same roof 

under the same roof sir how came you 

hear me out madam  letting go her trembling hands and snatching them
back again with an eagerness that made her start  i have a thousand
things to say to talk of relating to our present and future prospects 
but when i want to open my whole soul to you you are always contriving
to keep me at a distance you make me inconsistent with myself your
heart is set upon delays you must have views that you will not own 
tell me madam i conjure you to tell me this moment without subterfuge
or reserve in what light am i to appear to you in future i cannot bear
this distance the suspense you hold me in i cannot bear 

in what light mr lovelace  visibly terrified   in no bad light i
hope pray mr lovelace do not grasp my hands so hard  endeavouring to
withdraw them   pray let me go 

you hate me madam 

i hate nobody sir 

you hate me madam repeated i 

instigated and resolved as i came up i wanted some new provocation 
the devil indeed as soon as my angel made her appearance crept out of
my heart but he had left the door open and was no farther off than my
elbow 

you come up in no good temper i see mr lovelace but pray be not
violent i have done you no hurt pray be not violent 


sweet creature and i clasped one arm about her holding one hand in my
other you have done me no hurt i could have devoured her but
restraining myself you have done me the greatest hurt in what have i
deserved the distance you keep me at i knew not what to say 

she struggled to disengage herself pray mr lovelace let me
withdraw i know not why this is i know not what i have done to offend
you i see you are come with a design to quarrel with me if you would
not terrify me by the ill humour you are in permit me to withdraw i
will hear all you have to say another time to-morrow morning as i sent
you word but indeed you frighten me i beseech you if you have any
value for me permit me to withdraw 

night mid-night is necessary belford surprise terror must be
necessary to the ultimate trial of this charming creature say the women
below what they will i could not hold my purposes this was not the
first time that i had intended to try if she could forgive 

i kissed her hand with a fervour as if i would have left my lips upon
it withdraw then dearest and ever-dear creature indeed i entered
in a very ill humour i cannot bear the distance at which you so
causelessly keep me withdraw madam since it is your will to withdraw 
and judge me generously judge me but as i deserve to be judged and let
me hope to meet you to-morrow morning early in such a temper as becomes
our present situation and my future hopes 

and so saying i conducted her to the door and left her there but 
instead of going down to the women i went into my own chamber and
locked myself in ashamed of being awed by her majestic loveliness and
apprehensive virtue into so great a change of purpose notwithstanding i
had such just provocations from the letters of her saucy friend formed
on her own representations of facts and situations between herself and
me 


 


 the lady dated sunday night thus describes her terrors and mr 
 lovelace's behaviour on the occasion  

on my entering the dining-room he took my hand in his in such a humour 
i saw plainly he was resolved to quarrel with me and for what what had
i done to him i never in my life beheld in any body such wild such
angry such impatient airs i was terrified and instead of being as
angry as i intended to be i was forced to be all mildness i can hardly
remember what were his first words i was so frighted but you hate me 
madam you hate me madam were some of them with such a fierceness i
wished myself a thousand miles distant from him i hate nobody said i 
i thank god i hate nobody you terrify me mr lovelace let me leave
you the man my dear looked quite ugly i never saw a man look so ugly
as passion made him look and for what and so he grasped my hands 
fierce creature he so grasped my hands in short he seemed by his
looks and by his words once putting his arms about me to wish me to
provoke him so that i had nothing to do but to beg of him which i did
repeatedly to permit me to withdraw and to promise to meet him at his
own time in the morning 

it was with a very ill grace that he complied on that condition and at
parting he kissed my hand with such a savageness that a redness remains
upon it still 

do you not think my dear that i have reason to be incensed at him my
situation considered am i not under a necessity as it were of
quarrelling with him at least every other time i see him no prudery 
no coquetry no tyranny in my heart or in my behaviour to him that i
know of no affected procrastination aiming at nothing but decorum 
he as much concerned and so he ought to think as i to have that
observed too much in his power cast upon him by the cruelty of my
relations no other protection to fly to but his one plain path before
us yet such embarrasses such difficulties such subjects for doubt for
cavil for uneasiness as fast as one is obviated another to be
introduced and not by myself know not how introduced what pleasure can
i propose to myself in meeting such a wretch 

perfect for me my dearest miss howe perfect for me i beseech you your
kind scheme with mrs townsend and i will then leave this man 

my temper i believe is changed no wonder if it be i question
whether ever it will be what it was but i cannot make him half so
uneasy by the change as i am myself see you not how from step to
step he grows upon me i tremble to look back upon his encroachments 
and now to give me cause to apprehend more evil from him than
indignation will permit me to express o my dear perfect your scheme 
and let me fly from so strange a wretch 

yet to be first an eloper from my friends to him as the world supposes 
and now to be so from him  to whom i know not   how hard to one who ever
endeavoured to shun intricate paths but he must certainly have views in
quarrelling with me thus which he dare not own yet what can they be 
i am terrified but to think of what they may be 

let me but get from him as to my reputation if i leave him that is
already too much wounded for me now to be careful about any thing but
how to act so as that my own heart shall not reproach me as to the
world's censure i must be content to suffer that an unhappy
composition however what a wreck have my fortunes suffered to be
obliged to throw overboard so many valuables to preserve indeed the
only valuable a composition that once it would have half broken my
heart to think there would have been the least danger that i should be
obliged to submit to 

you my dear could not be a stranger to my most secret failings 
although you would not tell me of them what a pride did i take in the
applause of every one what a pride even in supposing i had not that
pride which concealed itself from my unexamining heart under the
specious veil of humility doubling the merit to myself by the supposed 
and indeed imputed gracefulness in the manner of conferring benefits 
when i had not a single merit in what i did vastly overpaid by the
pleasure of doing some little good and impelled as i may say by
talents given me for what not to be proud of 

so desirous in short to be considered as an example a vanity which
my partial admirers put into my head and so secure in my own virtue 

i am punished enough enough mortified for this my vanity i hope 
enough if it so please the all-gracious inflictor since now i verily
think i more despise myself for my presumptuous self-security as well
as vanity than ever i secretly vaunted myself on my good inclinations 
secretly i say however for indeed i had not given myself leisure to
reflect till i was thus mortified how very imperfect i was nor how
much truth there is in what divines tell us that we sin in our best
performances 

but i was very young but here let me watch over myself again for in
those four words i was very young is there not a palliation couched 
that were enough to take all efficacy from the discovery and confession 

what strange imperfect beings but self here which is at the bottom of
all we do and of all we wish is the grand misleader 

i will not apologize to you my dear for these grave reflections is it
not enough to make the unhappy creature look into herself and endeavour
to detect herself who from such a high reputation left to proud and
presumptuous self should by one thoughtless step be brought to the
dreadful situation i am in 

let me however look forward to despond would be to add sin to sin 
and whom have i to raise me up whom to comfort me if i desert myself 
thou o father who i hope hast not yet deserted hast not yet cursed
me for i am thine it is fit that mediation should supply the rest 


 


i was so disgusted with him as well as frighted by him that on my
return to my chamber in a fit of passionate despair i tore almost in
two the answer i had written to his proposals 

i will see him in the morning because i promised i would but i will go
out and that without him or any attendant if he account not tolerably
for his sudden change of behaviour and a proper opportunity offer of a
private lodging in some creditable house i will not any more return to
this at present i think so and there will i either attend the
perfecting of your scheme or by your epistolary mediation make my own
terms with the wretch since it is your opinion that i must be his and
cannot help myself or perhaps take a resolution to throw myself at
once into lady betty's protection and this will hinder him from making
his insolently-threatened visit to harlowe-place 


 the lady writes again on monday evening and gives her friend an account
 of all that passed between herself and mr lovelace that day and of
 her being terrified out of her purpose of going out but mr 
 lovelace's next letters giving a more ample account of all hers are
 omitted 

it is proper however to mention that she re-urges miss howe from the
 dissatisfaction she has reason for from what passed between mr 
 lovelace and herself to perfect her scheme in relation to mrs 
 townsend she concludes this letter in these words  

i should say something of your last favour but a few hours ago received 
and of your dialogue with your mother are you not very whimsical my
dear i have but two things to wish for on this occasion the one that
your charming pleasantry had a better subject than that you find for it
in this dialogue the other that my situation were not such as must too
often damp that pleasantry in you and will not permit me to enjoy it as
i used to do be however happy in yourself though you cannot in

your
clarissa harlowe 



letter xlvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday morning may 22 


no generosity in this lady none at all wouldst thou not have thought 
that after i had permitted her to withdraw primed for mischief as i was 
she would meet me next morning early and that with a smile making me
one of her best courtesies 

i was in the dining-room before six expecting her she opened not her
door i went up stairs and down and hemm'd and called will called
dorcas threw the doors hard to but still she opened not her door thus
till half an hour after eight fooled i away my time and then breakfast
ready i sent dorcas to request her company 

but i was astonished when following the wench as she did at the first
invitation i saw her enter dressed all but her gloves and those and
her fan in her hand in the same moment bidding dorcas direct will to
get her a chair to the door 

cruel creature thought i to expose me thus to the derision of the women
below 

going abroad madam 

i am sir 

i looked cursed silly i am sure you will breakfast first i hope 
madam and a very humble strain yet with an hundred tender looks in my
heart 

had she given me more notice of her intention i had perhaps wrought
myself up to the frame i was in the day before and begun my vengeance 
and immediately came into my head all the virulence that had been
transcribed for me from miss howe's letters and in that letter which i
had transcribed myself 

yes she would drink one dish and then laid her gloves and fan in the
window just by 

i was perfectly disconcerted i hemm'd and was going to speak several
times but i knew not in what key who's modest now thought i who's
insolent now how a tyrant of a woman confounds a bashful man she was
acting miss howe i thought and i the spiritless hickman 

at last i will begin thought i 

she a dish i a dish 

sip her eyes her own she like a haughty and imperious sovereign 
conscious of dignity every look a favour 

sip like her vassal i lips and hands trembling and not knowing that i
sipp'd or tasted 

i was i was i sipp'd drawing in my breath and the liquor together 
though i scalded my mouth with it i was in hopes madam 

dorcas came in just then dorcas said she is a chair gone for 

damn'd impertinence thought i thus to put me out in my speech and i
was forced to wait for the servant's answer to the insolent mistress's
question 

william is gone for one madam 

this cost me a minute's silence before i could begin again and then it
was with my hopes and my hopes and my hopes that i should have been
early admitted to 

what weather is it dorcas said she as regardless of me as if i had not
been present 

a little lowering madam the sun is gone in it was very fine half an
hour ago 

i had no patience up i rose down went the tea-cup saucer and all 
confound the weather the sunshine and the wench begone for a devil 
when i am speaking to your lady and have so little opportunity given me 

up rose the saucy-face half-frighted and snatched from the window her
gloves and fan 

you must not go madam seizing her hand by my soul you must not 

must not sir but i must you can curse your maid in my absence as
well as if i were present except except you intend for me what you
direct to her 

dearest creature you must not go you must not leave me such determined
scorn such contempts questions asked your servant of no meaning but to
break in upon me i cannot bear it 

detain me not  struggling   i will not be withheld i like you not nor
your ways you sought to quarrel with me yesterday for no reason in the
world that i can think of but because i was too obliging you are an
ungrateful man and i hate you with my whole heart mr lovelace 

do not make me desperate madam permit me to say that you shall not
leave me in this humour wherever you go i will attend you had miss
howe been my friend i had not been thus treated it is but too plain to
whom my difficulties are owing i have long observed that every letter
you received from her makes an alteration in your behaviour to me she
would have you treat me as she treats mr hickman i suppose but
neither does that treatment become your admirable temper to offer nor me
to receive 

this startled her she did not care to have me think hardly of miss
howe 

but recollecting herself miss howe said she is a friend to virtue and
to good men if she like not you it is because you are not one of
those 

yes madam and therefore to speak of mr hickman and myself as you
both i suppose think of each she treats him as she would not treat a
lovelace i challenge you madam to shew me but one of the many letters
you have received from her where i am mentioned 

miss howe is just miss howe is good replied she she writes she
speaks of every body as they deserve if you point me out but any one
occasion upon which you have reason to build a merit to yourself as
either just or good or even generous i will look out for her letter on
that occasion  if such an occasion there be i have certainly acquainted
her with it  and will engage it shall be in your favour 

devilish severe and as indelicate as severe to put a modish man upon
hunting backward after his own merits 

she would have flung from me i will not be detained mr lovelace i
will go out 

indeed you must not madam in this humour and i placed myself between
her and the door and then fanning she threw herself into a chair 
her sweet face all crimsoned over with passion 

i cast myself at her feet begone mr lovelace said she with a
rejecting motion her fan in her hand for your own sake leave me my
soul is above thee man with both her hands pushing me from her urge
me not to tell thee how sincerely i think my soul above thee thou
hast in mine a proud a too proud heart to contend with leave me and
leave me for ever thou has a proud heart to contend with 

her air her manner her voice were bewitchingly noble though her words
were so severe 

let me worship an angel said i no woman forgive me dearest creature 
 creature if you be forgive me forgive my inadvertencies forgive my
inequalities pity my infirmities who is equal to my clarissa 

i trembled between admiration and love and wrapt my arms about her
knees as she sat she tried to rise at the moment but my clasping
round her thus ardently drew her down again and never was woman more
affrighted but free as my clasping emotion might appear to her
apprehensive heart i had not at the instant any thought but what
reverence inspired and till she had actually withdrawn  which i
permitted under promise of a speedy return and on her consent to dismiss
the chair  all the motions of my heart were as pure as her own 

she kept not her word an hour i waited before i sent to claim her
promise she could not possibly see me yet was her answer as soon as
she could she would 

dorcas says she still excessively trembled and ordered her to give her
hartshorn and water 

a strange apprehensive creature her terror is too great for the
occasion evils are often greater in apprehension than in reality hast
thou never observed that the terrors of a bird caught and actually in
the hand bear no comparison to what we might have supposed those terrors
would be were we to have formed a judgment of the same bird by its
shyness before it was taken 

dear creature did she never romp did she never from girlhood to now 
hoyden the innocent kinds of freedom taken and allowed on these
occasions would have familiarized her to greater sacrilege but to
touch the hem of her garment excess of delicacy o the consecrated
beauty how can she think to be a wife 

but how do i know till i try whether she may not by a less alarming
treatment be prevailed upon or whether  day i have done with thee   she
may not yield to nightly surprises this is still the burden of my song 
i can marry her when i will and if i do after prevailing whether by
surprise or by reluctant consent whom but myself shall i have injured 


 


it is now eleven o'clock she will see me as soon as she can she tells
polly horton who made her a tender visit and to whom she is less
reserved than to any body else her emotion she assures her was not
owing to perverseness to nicety to ill humour but to weakness of
heart she has not strength of mind sufficient she says to enable her
to support her condition 

yet what a contradiction weakness of heart says she with such a
strength of will o belford she is a lion-hearted lady in every case
where her honour her punctilio rather calls for spirit but i have had
reason more than once in her case to conclude that the passions of the
gentle slower to be moved than those of the quick are the most flaming 
the most irresistible when raised yet her charming body is not equally
organized the unequal partners pull two ways and the divinity within
her tears her silken frame but had the same soul informed a masculine
body never would there have been a truer hero 


monday two o'clock 

not yet visible my beloved is not well what expectations had she from
my ardent admiration of her more rudeness than revenge apprehended 
yet how my soul thirsts for revenge upon both these ladies i must have
recourse to my master-strokes this cursed project of miss howe and her
mrs townsend if i cannot contrive to render it abortive will be always
a sword hanging over my head upon every little disobligations my
beloved will be for taking wing and the pains i have taken to deprive
her of every other refuge or protection in order to make her absolutely
dependent upon me will be all thrown away but perhaps i shall find out
a smuggler to counterplot miss howe 

thou remembrest the contention between the sun and the north-wind in the
fable which should first make an honest traveller throw off his cloak 

boreas began first he puffed away most vehemently and often made the
poor fellow curve and stagger but with no other effect than to cause
him to wrap his surtout the closer about him 

but when it came to phoebus's turn he so played upon the traveller with
his beams that he made him first unbutton and then throw it quite off 
 nor left he till he obliged him to take to the friendly shade of a
spreading beech where prostrating himself on the thrown-off cloak he
took a comfortable nap 

the victor-god then laughed outright both at boreas and the traveller 
and pursued his radiant course shining upon and warming and cherishing
a thousand new objects as he danced along and at night when he put up
his fiery coursers he diverted his thetis with the relation of his
pranks in the passed day 

i in like manner will discard all my boisterous inventions and if i
can oblige my sweet traveller to throw aside but for one moment the
cloak of her rigid virtue i shall have nothing to do but like the sun 
to bless new objects with my rays but my chosen hours of conversation
and repose after all my peregrinations will be devoted to my goddess 


 


and now belford according to my new system i think this house of mrs 
fretchville an embarrass upon me i will get rid of it for some time at
least mennell when i am out shall come to her inquiring for me 
what for thou'lt ask what for hast thou not heard what has befallen
poor mrs fretchville then i'll tell thee 

one of her maids about a week ago was taken with the small-pox the
rest kept their mistress ignorant of it till friday and then she came to
know of it by accident the greater half of the plagues poor mortals of
condition are tormented with proceed from the servants they take partly
for show partly for use and with a view to lessen their cares 

this has so terrified the widow that she is taken with all the symptoms
that threaten an attack from that dreadful enemy of fair faces so must
not think of removing yet cannot expect that we should be further
delayed on her account 

she now wishes with all her heart that she had known her own mind and
gone into the country at first when i treated about the house this evil
then had not happened a cursed cross accident for us too heigh-ho 
nothing else i think in this mortal life people need not study to
bring crosses upon themselves by their petulancies 

so this affair of the house will be over at least for one while but
then i can fall upon an expedient which will make amends for this
disappointment i must move slow in order to be sure i have a
charming contrivance or two in my head even supposing my beloved should
get away to bring her back again 

but what is become of lord m i trow that he writes not to me in
answer to my invitation if he would send me such a letter as i could
show it might go a great way towards a perfect reconciliation i have
written to charlotte about it he shall soon hear from me and that in a
way he won't like if he writes not quickly he has sometimes threatened
to disinherit me but if i should renounce him it would be but justice 
and would vex him ten times more than any thing he can do will vex me 
then the settlements unavoidably delayed by his neglect how shall i
bear such a life of procrastination i who as to my will and
impatience and so forth am of the true lady-make and can as little
bear controul and disappointment as the best of them 


 


another letter from miss howe i suppose it is that which she promises
in her last to send her relating to the courtship between old tony the
uncle and annabella the mother i should be extremely rejoiced to see
it no more of the smuggler-plot in it surely this letter it seems 
she has put in her pocket but i hope i shall soon find it deposited
with the rest 


monday evening 

at my repeated request she condescended to meet me in the dining-room to
afternoon-tea and not before 

she entered with bashfulness as i thought in a pretty confusion for
having carried her apprehensions too far sullen and slow moved she
towards the tea-table dorcas present busy in tea-cup preparations i
took her reluctant hand and pressed it to my lips dearest loveliest
of creatures why this distance why this displeasure how can you thus
torture the faithfullest heart in the world 

she disengaged her hand again i would have snatched it 

be quiet  peevishly withdrawing it   and down she sat a gentle
palpitation in the beauty of beauties indicating a mingled sullenness and
resentment her snowy handkerchief rising and falling and a sweet flush
overspreading her charming cheeks 

for god's sake madam  and a third time i would have taken her
repulsing hand  

and for the same sake sir no more teasing 

dorcas retired i drew my chair nearer her's and with the most
respectful tenderness took her hand and told her that i could not
forbear to express my apprehensions from the distance she was so
desirous to keep me at that if any man in the world was more indifferent
to her to use no harsher word than another it was the unhappy wretch
before her 

she looked steadily upon me for a moment and with her other hand not
withdrawing that i held pulled her handkerchief out of her pocket and
by a twinkling motion urged forward a tear or two which having arisen in
each sweet eye it was plain by that motion she would rather have
dissipated but answered me only with a sigh and an averted face 

i urged her to speak to look up at me to bless me with an eye more
favourable 

i had reason she told me for my complaint of her indifference she saw
nothing in my mind that was generous i was not a man to be obliged or
favoured my strange behaviour to her since saturday night for no cause
at all that she knew of convinced her of this whatever hopes she had
conceived of me were utterly dissipated all my ways were disgustful to
her 

this cut me to the heart the guilty i believe in every case less
patiently bear the detecting truth than the innocent do the degrading
falsehood 

i bespoke her patience while i took the liberty to account for this
change on my part i re-acknowledged the pride of my heart which could
not bear the thought of that want of preference in the heart of a lady
whom i hoped to call mine which she had always manifested marriage i
said was a state that was not to be entered upon with indifference on
either side 

it is insolence interrupted she it is a presumption sir to expect
tokens of value without resolving to deserve them you have no whining
creature before you mr lovelace overcome by weak motives to love
where there is no merit miss howe can tell you sir that i never loved
the faults of my friend nor ever wished her to love me for mine it was
a rule with us not to spare each other and would a man who has nothing
but faults for pray sir what are your virtues expect that i should
show a value for him indeed if i did i should not deserve even his
value but ought to be despised by him 

well have you madam kept up to this noble manner of thinking you are
in no danger of being despised for any marks of tenderness or favour
shown to the man before you you have been perhaps you'll think 
laudably studious of making and taking occasions to declare that it was
far from being owing to your choice that you had any thoughts of me my
whole soul madam in all its errors in all its wishes in all its
views had been laid open and naked before you had i been encouraged by
such a share in your confidence and esteem as would have secured me
against your apprehended worst constructions of what i should from time
to time have revealed to you and consulted you upon for never was
there a franker heart nor a man so ready to accuse himself  this 
belford is true   but you know madam how much otherwise it has been
between us doubt distance reserve on your part begat doubt fear 
awe on mine how little confidence as if we apprehended each other to
be a plotter rather than a lover how have i dreaded every letter that
has been brought you from wilson's and with reason since the last 
from which i expected so much on account of the proposals i had made you
in writing has if i may judge by the effects and by your denial of
seeing me yesterday though you could go abroad and in a chair too to
avoid my attendance on you set you against me more than ever 

i was guilty it seems of going to church said the indignant charmer 
and without the company of a man whose choice it would not have been to
go had i not gone i was guilty of desiring to have the whole sunday to
myself after i had obliged you against my will at a play and after
you had detained me equally to my dislike to a very late hour over-
night these were my faults for these i was to be punished i was to be
compelled to see you and to be terrified when i did see you by the most
shocking ill humour that was ever shown to a creature in my
circumstances and not bound to bear it you have pretended to find free
fault with my father's temper mr lovelace but the worst that he ever
showed after marriage was not in the least to be compared to what you
have shown twenty times beforehand and what are my prospects with you 
at the very best my indignation rises against you mr lovelace while
i speak to you when i recollect the many instances equally ungenerous
and unpolite of your behaviour to one whom you have brought into
distress and i can hardly bear you in my sight 

she turned from me standing up and lifting up her folded hands and
charming eyes swimming in tears o my father said the inimitable
creature you might have spared your heavy curse had you known how i
have been punished ever since my swerving feet led me out of your
garden-doors to meet this man then sinking into her chair a burst
of passionate tears forced their way down her glowing cheeks 

my dearest life  taking her still folded hands in mine   who can bear
an invocation so affecting though so passionate 

and as i hope to live my nose tingled as i once when a boy remember
it did and indeed once more very lately just before some tears came
into my eyes and i durst hardly trust my face in view of her's 

what have i done to deserve this impatient exclamation have i at any
time by word by deeds by looks given you cause to doubt my honour my
reverence my adoration i may call it of your virtues all is owing to
misapprehension i hope on both sides condescend to clear up but your
part as i will mine and all must speedily be happy would to heaven i
loved that heaven as i love you and yet if i doubted a return in love 
let me perish if i should know how to wish you mine give me hope 
dearest creature give me but hope that i am your preferable choice 
give me but hope that you hate me not that you do not despise me 

o mr lovelace we have been long enough together to be tired of each
other's humours and ways ways and humours so different that perhaps
you ought to dislike me as much as i do you i think i think that i
cannot make an answerable return to the value you profess for me my
temper is utterly ruined you have given me an ill opinion of all
mankind of yourself in particular and withal so bad a one of myself 
that i shall never be able to look up having utterly and for ever lost
all that self-complacency and conscious pride which are so necessary to
carry a woman through this life with tolerable satisfaction to herself 

she paused i was silent by my soul thought i this sweet creature
will at last undo me 

she proceeded what now remains but that you pronounce me free of all
obligation to you and that you hinder me not from pursuing the destiny
that shall be allotted me 

again she paused i was still silent meditating whether to renounce all
further designs upon her whether i had not received sufficient evidence
of a virtue and of a greatness of soul that could not be questioned or
impeached 

she went on propitious to me be your silence mr lovelace tell me 
that i am free of all obligation to you you know i never made you
promises you know that you are not under any to me my broken
fortunes i matter not 

she was proceeding my dearest life said i i have been all this time 
though you fill me with doubts of your favour busy in the nuptial
preparations i am actually in treaty for equipage 

equipage sir trappings tinsel what is equipage what is life what
is any thing to a creature sunk so low as i am in my own opinion 
labouring under a father's curse unable to look backward without self-
reproach or forward without terror these reflections strengthened by
every cross accident and what but cross accidents befall me all my
darling schemes dashed in pieces all my hopes at an end deny me not the
liberty to refuge myself in some obscure corner where neither the
enemies you have made me nor the few friends you have left me may ever
hear of the supposed rash-one till those happy moments are at hand 
which shall expiate for all 

i had not a word to say for myself such a war in my mind had i never
known gratitude and admiration of the excellent creature before me 
combating with villanous habit with resolutions so premeditatedly made 
and with view so much gloried in an hundred new contrivances in my
head and in my heart that to be honest as it is called must all be
given up by a heart delighting in intrigue and difficulty miss howe's
virulences endeavoured to be recollected yet recollection refusing to
bring them forward with the requisite efficacy i had certainly been a
lost man had not dorcas come seasonably in with a letter on the
superscription written be pleased sir to open it now 

i retired to the window opened it it was from dorcas herself these
the contents be pleased to detain my lady a paper of importance to
transcribe i will cough when i have done 

i put the paper in my pocket and turned to my charmer less
disconcerted as she by that time had also a little recovered herself 
 one favour dearest creature let me but know whether miss howe
approves or disapproves of my proposals i know her to be my enemy i
was intending to account to you for the change of behaviour you accused
me of at the beginning of the conversation but was diverted from it by
your vehemence indeed my beloved creature you were very vehement do
you think it must not be matter of high regret to me to find my wishes
so often delayed and postponed in favour of your predominant view to a
reconciliation with relations who will not be reconciled to you to this
was owing your declining to celebrate our nuptials before we came to
town though you were so atrociously treated by your sister and your
whole family and though so ardently pressed to celebrate by me to this
was owing the ready offence you took at my four friends and at the
unavailing attempt i made to see a dropt letter little imagining from
what two such ladies could write to each other that there could be room
for mortal displeasure to this was owing the week's distance you held me
at till you knew the issue of another application but when they had
rejected that when you had sent my cold-received proposals to miss howe
for her approbation or advice as indeed i advised and had honoured me
with your company at the play on saturday night my whole behaviour
unobjectionable to the last hour must not madam the sudden change in
your conduct the very next morning astonish and distress me and this
persisted in with still stronger declarations after you had received the
impatiently-expected letter from miss howe must i not conclude that all
was owing to her influence and that some other application or project
was meditating that made it necessary to keep me again at a distance
till the result were known and which was to deprive me of you for ever 
for was not that your constantly-proposed preliminary well madam 
might i be wrought up to a half-phrensy by this apprehension and well
might i charge you with hating me and now dearest creature let me
know i once more ask you what is miss howe's opinion of my proposals 

were i disposed to debate with you mr lovelace i could very easily
answer your fine harangue but at present i shall only say that your
ways have been very unaccountable you seem to me if your meanings were
always just to have taken great pains to embarrass them whether owing
in you to the want of a clear head or a sound heart i cannot determine 
but it is to the want of one of them i verily think that i am to
ascribe the greatest part of your strange conduct 

curse upon the heart of the little devil said i who instigates you to
think so hardly of the faithfullest heart in the world 

how dare you sir and there she stopt having almost overshot herself 
as i designed she should 

how dare i what madam and i looked with meaning how dare i what 

vile man and do you and there again she stopt 

do i what madam and why vile man 

how dare you curse any body in my presence 

o the sweet receder but that was not to go off so with a lovelace 

why then dearest creature is there any body that instigates you if
there be again i curse them be they whom they will 

she was in a charming pretty passion and this was the first time that i
had the odds in my favour 

well madam it is just as i thought and now i know how to account for
a temper that i hope is not natural to you 

artful wretch and is it thus you would entrap me but know sir that i
received letters from nobody but miss howe miss howe likes some of your
ways as little as i do for i have set every thing before her yet she
is thus far your enemy as she is mine she thinks i could not refuse
your offers but endeavour to make the best of my lot and now you have
the truth would to heaven you were capable of dealing with equal
sincerity 

i am madam and here on my knee i renew my vows and my supplication 
that you will make me your's your's for ever and let me have cause to
bless you and miss howe in the same breath 

to say the truth belford i had before begun to think that the vixen of
a girl who certainly likes not hickman was in love with me 

rise sir from your too-ready knees and mock me not 

too-ready knees thought i though this humble posture so little affects
this proud beauty she knows not how much i have obtained of others of
her sex nor how often i have been forgiven for the last attempts by
kneeling 

mock you madam and i arose and re-urged her for the day i blamed
myself at the same time for the invitation i had given to lord m as
it might subject me to delay from his infirmities but told her that i
would write to him to excuse me if she had no objection or to give him
the day she would give me and not wait for him if he could not come in
time 

my day sir said she is never be not surprised a person of
politeness judging between us would not be surprised that i say so but
indeed mr lovelace  and wept through impatience   you either know not
how to treat with a mind of the least degree of delicacy notwithstanding
your birth and education or you are an ungrateful man and  after a
pause  a worse than ungrateful one but i will retire i will see you
again to-morrow i cannot before i think i hate you and if upon a
re-examination of my own heart i find i do i would not for the world
that matters should go on farther between us 

but i see i see she does not hate me how it would mortify my vanity 
if i thought there was a woman in the world much more this that could
hate me tis evident villain as she thinks me that i should not be an
odious villain if i could but at last in one instance cease to be a
villain she could not hold it determined as she had thought herself i
saw by her eyes the moment i endeavoured to dissipate her apprehensions 
on my too-ready knees as she calls them the moment the rough covering
my teasing behaviour has thrown over her affections is quite removed i
doubt not to find all silk and silver at the bottom all soft bright 
and charming 

i was however too much vexed disconcerted mortified to hinder her from
retiring and yet she had not gone if dorcas had not coughed 

the wench came in as soon as her lady had retired and gave me the copy
she had taken and what should it be but of the answer the truly
admirable creature had intended to give to my written proposals in
relation to settlements 

i have but just dipt my pen into this affecting paper were i to read it
attentively not a wink should i sleep this night to-morrow it shall
obtain my serious consideration 



letter xlviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday morning may 23 


the dear creature desires to be excused seeing me till evening she is
not very well as dorcas tells me 

read here if thou wilt the paper transcribed by dorcas it is
impossible that i should proceed with my projects against this admirable
woman were it not that i am resolved after a few trials more if as
nobly sustained as those she has passed through to make her if she
really hate me not legally mine 


to mr lovelace

when a woman is married that supreme earthly obligation requires that
in all instances where her husband's real honour is concerned she
should yield her own will to his but beforehand i could be glad 
conformably to what i have always signified to have the most explicit
assurances that every possible way should be tried to avoid litigation
with my father time and patience will subdue all things my prospects
of happiness are extremely contracted a husband's right will be always
the same in my lifetime i could wish nothing to be done of this sort 
your circumstances sir will not oblige you to extort violently from him
what is in his hands all that depends upon me either with regard to my
person to my diversions or to the economy that no married woman of
whatever rank or quality should be above inspecting shall be done to
prevent a necessity for such measures being taken and if there will be
no necessity for them it is to be hoped that motives less excusable will
not have force motives which must be founded in a littleness of mind 
which a woman who has not that littleness of mind will be under such
temptations as her duty will hardly be able at all times to check to
despise her husband for having especially in cases where her own family 
so much a part of herself and which will have obligations upon her
 though then but secondary ones from which she can never be freed is
intimately concerned 

this article then i urge to your most serious consideration as what
lies next my heart i enter not here minutely into the fatal
misunderstanding between them and you the fault may be in both but 
sir your's was the foundation-fault at least you gave a too-plausible
pretence for my brother's antipathy to work upon condescension was no
part of your study you chose to bear the imputations laid to your
charge rather than to make it your endeavour to obviate them 

but this may lead into hateful recrimination let it be remembered i
will only say in this place that in their eye you have robbed them of
a daughter they doated upon and that their resentments on this occasion
rise but in proportion to their love and their disappointment if they
were faulty in some of the measures they took while they themselves did
not think so who shall judge for them you sir who will judge every
body as you please and will let nobody judge you in your own particular 
must not be their judge it may therefore be expected that they will
stand out 

as for myself sir i must leave it so seems it to be destined to your
justice to treat me as you shall think i deserve but if your future
behaviour to them is not governed by that harsh-sounding implacableness 
which you charge upon some of their tempers the splendour of your
family and the excellent character of some of them of all indeed 
unless your own conscience furnishes you with one only exception will 
on better consideration do every thing with them for they may be
overcome perhaps however with the more difficulty as the greatly
prosperous less bear controul and disappointment than others for i will
own to you that i have often in secret lamented that their great
acquirements have been a snare to them perhaps as great a snare as some
other accidentals have been to you which being less immediately your own
gifts you have still less reason than they to value yourself upon them 

let me only on this subject further observe that condescension is not
meanness there is a glory in yielding that hardly any violent spirit
can judge of my brother perhaps is no more sensible of this than you 
but as you have talents which he has not who however has as i hope 
that regard for morals the want of which makes one of his objections to
you i could wish it may not be owing to you that your mutual dislikes
to each other do not subside for it is my earnest hope that in time you
may see each other without exciting the fears of a wife and a sister for
the consequence not that i should wish you to yield in points that
truly concerned your honour no sir i would be as delicate in such as
you yourself more delicate i will venture to say because more
uniformly so how vain how contemptible is that pride which shows
itself in standing upon diminutive observances and gives up and makes a
jest of the most important duties 

this article being considered as i wish all the rest will be easy 
were i to accept of the handsome separate provision you seem to intend
me added to the considerate sums arisen from my grandfather's estate
since his death more considerable than perhaps you may suppose from your
offer i should think it my duty to lay up for the family good and for
unforseen events out of it for as to my donations i would generally
confine myself in them to the tenth of my income be it what it would i
aim at no glare in what i do of that sort all i wish for is the power
of relieving the lame the blind the sick and the industrious poor and
those whom accident has made so or sudden distress reduced the common
or bred beggars i leave to others and to the public provision they
cannot be lower perhaps they wish not to be higher and not able to do
for every one i aim not at works of supererogation two hundred pounds
a year would do all i wish to do of the separate sort for all above i
would content myself to ask you except mistrusting your own economy 
you would give up to my management and keeping in order to provide for
future contingencies a larger portion for which as your steward i
would regularly account 

as to clothes i have particularly two suits which having been only in
a manner tried on would answer for any present occasion jewels i have
of my grandmother's which want only new-setting another set i have 
which on particular days i used to wear although these are not sent me 
i have no doubt being merely personals but they will when i should
send for them in another name till when i should not choose to wear any 

as to your complaints of my diffidences and the like i appeal to your
own heart if it be possible for you to make my case your own for one
moment and to retrospect some parts of your behaviour words and
actions whether i am not rather to be justified than censured and
whether of all the men in the world avowing what you avow you ought
not to think so if you do not let me admonish you sir from the very
great mismatch that then must appear to be in our minds never to seek 
nor so much as to wish to bring about the most intimate union of
interests between yourself and

clarissa harlowe 
may 20 


 


the original of this charming paper as dorcas tells me was torn almost
in two in one of her pets i suppose what business have the sex 
whose principal glory is meekness and patience and resignation to be
in a passion i trow will not she who allows herself such liberties as
a maiden take greater when married 

and a wife to be in a passion let me tell the ladies it is an
impudent thing begging their pardon and as imprudent as impudent for a
wife to be in a passion if she mean not eternal separation or wicked
defiance by it for is it not rejecting at once all that expostulatory
meekness and gentle reasoning mingled with sighs as gentle and graced
with bent knees supplicating hands and eyes lifted up to your imperial
countenance just running over that you should make a reconciliation
speedy and as lasting as speedy even suppose the husband is in the
wrong will not this being so give the greater force to her
expostulation 

now i think of it a man should be in the wrong now-and-then to make his
wife shine miss howe tells my charmer that adversity is her shining-
time tis a generous thing in a man to make his wife shine at his own
expense to give her leave to triumph over him by patient reasoning for
were he to be too imperial to acknowledge his fault on the spot she will
find the benefit of her duty and submission in future and in the high
opinion he will conceive of her prudence and obligingness and so by
degrees she will become her master's master 

but for a wife to come up with kemboed arm the other hand thrown out 
perhaps with a pointing finger look ye here sir take notice if you
are wrong i'll be wrong if you are in a passion i'll be in a passion 
 rebuff for rebuff sir if you fly i'll tear if you swear i'll
curse and the same room and the same bed shall not hold us sir -
for remember i am married sir i am a wife sir you can't help
yourself sir your honour as well as your peace is in my keeping 
and if you like not this treatment you may have worse sir 

ah jack jack what man who has observed these things either implied
or expressed in other families would wish to be a husband 

dorcas found this paper in one of the drawers of her lady's dressing-
table she was reperusing it as she supposes when the honest wench
carried my message to desire her to favour me at the tea-table for she
saw her pop a paper into the drawer as she came in and there on her
mistress's going to meet me in the dining-room she found it and to be
this 

but i had better not to have had a copy of it as far as i know for 
determined as i was before upon my operations it instantly turned all my
resolutions in her favour yet i would give something to be convinced
that she did not pop it into her drawer before the wench in order for me
to see it and perhaps if i were to take notice of it to discover
whether dorcas according to miss howe's advice were most my friend or
her's 

the very suspicion of this will do her no good for i cannot bear to be
artfully dealt with people love to enjoy their own peculiar talents in
monopoly as arguments against me in her behalf but i know every tittle
thou canst say upon it spare therefore thy wambling nonsense i desire
thee and leave this sweet excellence and me to our fate that will
determine for us as it shall please itself for as cowley says 

 an unseen hand makes all our moves 
 and some are great and some are small 
 some climb to good some from great fortunes fall 
 some wise men and some fools we call 
 figures alas of speech for destiny plays us all 

but after all i am sorry almost sorry for how shall i do to be quite
sorry when it is not given to me to be so that i cannot until i have
made further trials resolve upon wedlock 

i have just read over again this intended answer to my proposals and how
i adore her for it 

but yet another yet she has not given it or sent it to me it is not
therefore her answer it is not written for me though to me 

nay she has not intended to send it to me she has even torn it perhaps
with indignation as thinking it too good for me by this action she
absolutely retracts it why then does my foolish fondness seek to
establish for her the same merit in my heart as if she avowed it 
pr'ythee dear belford once more leave us to our fate and do not thou
interpose with thy nonsense to weaken a spirit already too squeamish 
and strengthen a conscience that has declared itself of her party 

then again remember thy recent discoveries lovelace remember her
indifference attended with all the appearance of contempt and hatred 
view her even now wrapt up in reserve and mystery meditating plots as
far as thou knowest against the sovereignty thou hast by right of
conquest obtained over her remember in short all thou hast
threatened to remember against this insolent beauty who is a rebel to
the power she has listed under 

but yet how dost thou propose to subdue thy sweet enemy abhorred be
force be the necessity of force if that can be avoided there is no
triumph in force no conquest over the will no prevailing by gentle
degrees over the gentle passions force is the devil 

my cursed character as i have often said was against me at setting out
 yet is she not a woman cannot i find one yielding or but half-
yielding moment if she do not absolutely hate me 

but with what can i tempt her riches she was born to and despises 
knowing what they are jewels and ornaments to a mind so much a jewel 
and so richly set her worthy consciousness will not let her value love
 if she be susceptible of love it seems to be so much under the
direction of prudence that one unguarded moment i fear cannot be
reasonably hoped for and so much vigilance so much apprehensiveness 
that her fears are ever aforehand with her dangers then her love or
virtue seems to be principle native principle or if not native so
deeply rooted that its fibres have struck into her heart and as she
grew up so blended and twisted themselves with the strings of life that
i doubt there is no separating of the one without cutting the others
asunder 

what then can be done to make such a matchless creature get over the
first tests in order to put her to the grand proof whether once
overcome she will not be always overcome 

our mother and her nymphs say i am a perfect craven and no lovelace 
and so i think but this is no simpering smiling charmer as i have
found others to be when i have touched upon affecting subjects at a
distance as once or twice i have tried to her the mother introducing
them to make sex palliate the freedom to sex when only we three
together she is above the affectation of not seeming to understand you 
she shows by her displeasure and a fierceness not natural to her eye 
that she judges of an impure heart by an impure mouth and darts dead at
once even the embryo hopes of an encroaching lover however distantly
insinuated before the meaning hint can dawn into double entendre 

by my faith jack as i sit gazing upon her my whole soul in my eyes 
contemplating her perfections and thinking when i have seen her easy
and serene what would be her thoughts did she know my heart as well as
i know it when i behold her disturbed and jealous and think of the
justness of her apprehensions and that she cannot fear so much as there
is room for her to fear my heart often misgives me 

and must think i o creature so divinely excellent and so beloved of my
soul those arms those encircling arms that would make a monarch happy 
be used to repel brutal force all their strength unavailingly perhaps 
exerted to repel it and to defend a person so delicately framed can
violence enter into the heart of a wretch who might entitle himself to
all her willing yet virtuous love and make the blessings he aspireth
after her duty to confer begone villain-purposes sink ye all to the
hell that could only inspire ye and i am then ready to throw myself at
her feet to confess my villainous designs to avow my repentance and
put it out of my power to act unworthily by such an excellence 

how then comes it that all these compassionate and as some would call
them honest sensibilities go off why miss howe will tell thee she
says i am the devil by my conscience i think he has at present a
great share in me 

there's ingenuousness how i lay myself open to thee but seest thou not 
that the more i say against myself the less room there is for thee
to take me to task o belford belford i cannot cannot at least at
present i cannot marry 

then her family my bitter enemies to supple to them or if i do not to
make her as unhappy as she can be from my attempts 

then does she not love them too much me too little 

she now seems to despise me miss howe declares that she really does
despise me to be despised by a wife what a thought is that to be
excelled by a wife too in every part of praise-worthy knowledge to
take lessons to take instructions from a wife more than despise me 
she herself has taken time to consider whether she does not hate me 
i hate you lovelace with my whole heart said she to me but yesterday 
my soul is above thee man urge me not to tell thee how sincerely i
think my soul above thee how poor indeed was i then even in my own
heart so visible a superiority to so proud a spirit as mine and here
from below from below indeed from these women i am so goaded on 

yet tis poor too to think myself a machine in the hands of such
wretches i am no machine lovelace thou art base to thyself but to
suppose thyself a machine 

but having gone thus far i should be unhappy if after marriage in the
petulance of ill humour i had it to reproach myself that i did not try
her to the utmost and yet i don't know how it is but this lady the
moment i come into her presence half-assimilates me to her own virtue 
once or twice to say nothing of her triumph over me on sunday night i
was prevailed upon to fluster myself with an intention to make some
advances which if obliged to recede i might lay upon raised spirits 
but the instant i beheld her i was soberized into awe and reverence and
the majesty of her even visible purity first damped and then extinguished 
my double flame 

what a surprisingly powerful effect so much and so long in my power she 
so instigated by some of her own sex and so stimulated by passion i 
how can this be accounted for in a lovelace 

but what a heap of stuff have i written how have i been run away with 
 by what canst thou say by what o thou lurking varletess conscience 
 is it thou that hast thus made me of party against myself how camest
thou in in what disguise thou egregious haunter of my more agreeable
hours stand thou with fate but neuter in this controversy and if i
cannot do credit to human nature and to the female sex by bringing down
such an angel as this to class with and adorn it for adorn it she does
in her very foibles then i am all your's and never will resist you
more 

here i arose i shook myself the window was open always the
troublesome bosom-visiter the intruder is flown i see it yet and
now it lessens to my aching eye and now the cleft air is closed after it 
and it is out of sight and once more i am

robert lovelace 



letter xlix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday may 23 


well did i and but just in time to conclude to have done with mrs 
fretchville and the house for here mennell has declared that he cannot
in conscience and honour go any farther he would not for the world be
accessory to the deceiving of such a lady i was a fool to let either
you or him see her for ever since ye have both had scruples which
neither would have had were a woman to have been in the question 

well i can't help it 

mennell has however though with some reluctance consented to write me
a letter provided i will allow it to be the last step he shall take in
this affair 

i presumed i told him that if i could cause mrs fretchville's woman to
supply his place he would have no objection to that 

none he says but is it not pity 

a pitiful fellow such a ridiculous kind of pity his as those silly
souls have who would not kill an innocent chicken for the world but
when killed to their hands are always the most greedy devourers of it 

now this letter gives the servant the small-pox and she has given it to
her unhappy vapourish lady vapourish people are perpetual subjects for
diseases to work upon name but the malady and it is theirs in a
moment ever fitted for inoculation the physical tribe's milch-cows 
 a vapourish or splenetic patient is a fiddle for the doctors and they
are eternally playing upon it sweet music does it make them all their
difficulty except a case extraordinary happens as poor mrs 
fretchville's who has realized her apprehensions is but to hold their
countenance while their patient is drawing up a bill of indictment
against himself and when they have heard it proceed to punish the
right word for prescribe why should they not when the criminal has
confessed his guilt and punish they generally do with a vengeance 

yet silly toads too now i think of it for why when they know they
cannot do good may they not as well endeavour to gratify as to
nauseate the patient's palate 

were i a physician i'd get all the trade to myself for malmsey and
cyprus and the generous product of the cape a little disguised should
be my principal doses as these would create new spirits how would the
revived patient covet the physic and adore the doctor 

give all the paraders of the faculty whom thou knowest this hint there
could but one inconvenience arise from it the apothecaries would find
their medicines cost them something but the demand for quantities would
answer that since the honest nurse would be the patient's taster 
perpetually requiring repetitions of the last cordial julap 

well but to the letter yet what need of further explanation after the
hints in my former the widow can't be removed and that's enough and
mennell's work is over and his conscience left to plague him for his own
sins and not another man's and very possibly plague enough will give
him for those 

this letter is directed to robert lovelace esq or in his absence to
his lady she has refused dining with me or seeing me and i was out
when it came she opened it so is my lady by her own consent proud and
saucy as she is 

i am glad at my heart that it came before we entirely make up she would
else perhaps have concluded it to be contrived for a delay and now 
moreover we can accommodate our old and new quarrels together and
that's contrivance you know but how is her dear haughty heart humbled
to what it was when i knew her first that she can apprehend any delays
from me and have nothing to do but to vex at them 

i came in to dinner she sent me down the letter desiring my excuse for
opening it did it before she was aware lady-pride belford 
recollection then retrogradation 

i requested to see her upon it that moment but she desires to suspend
our interview till morning i will bring her to own before i have done
with her that she can't see me too often 

my impatience was so great on an occasion so unexpected that i could
not help writing to tell her how much vexed i was at the accident but
that it need not delay my happy day as that did not depend upon the
house  she knew that before she'll think and so did i   and as mrs 
fretchville by mr mennell so handsomely expressed her concern upon it 
and her wishes that it could suit us to bear with the unavoidable delay 
i hoped that going down to the lawn for two or three of the summer-
months when i was made the happiest of men would be favourable to all
round 

the dear creature takes this incident to heart i believe she has sent
word to my repeated request to see her notwithstanding her denial that
she cannot till the morning it shall be then at six o'clock if i
please 

to be sure i do please 

can see her but once a day now jack 

did i tell thee that i wrote a letter to my cousin montague wondering
that i heard not from lord m as the subject was so very interesting in
it i acquainted her with the house i was about taking and with mrs 
fretchville's vapourish delays 

i was very loth to engage my own family either man or woman in this
affair but i must take my measures securely and already they all think
as bad of me as they well can you observe by my lord m s letter to
yourself that the well-manner'd peer is afraid i should play this
admirable creature one of my usual dog's tricks 

i have received just now an answer from charlotte 

charlot i'n't well a stomach disorder 

no wonder a girl's stomach should plague her a single woman that's it 
when she has a man to plague it will have something besides itself to
prey upon knowest thou not moreover that man is the woman's sun woman
is the man's earth how dreary how desolate the earth that the suns
shines not upon 

poor charlotte but i heard she was not well that encouraged me to
write to her and to express myself a little concerned that she had not 
of her own accord thought of a visit in town to my charmer 

here follows a copy of her letter thou wilt see by it that every little
monkey is to catechise me they all depend upon my good-nature 


m hall may 22 

dear cousin 

we have been in daily hope for a long time i must call it of hearing
that the happy knot was tied my lord has been very much out of order 
and yet nothing would serve him but he would himself write an answer to
your letter it was the only opportunity he should ever have perhaps 
to throw in a little good advice to you with the hope of its being of
any signification and he has been several hours in a day as his gout
would let him busied in it it wants now only his last revisal he
hopes it will have the greater weight with you as it appear all in his
own hand-writing 

indeed mr lovelace his worthy heart is wrapt up in you i wish you
loved yourself but half as well but i believe too that if all the
family loved you less you would love yourself more 

his lordship has been very busy at the times he could not write in
consulting pritchard about those estates which he proposes to transfer to
you on the happy occasion that he may answer your letter in the most
acceptable manner and show by effects how kindly he takes your
invitation i assure you he is mighty proud of it 

as for myself i am not at all well and have not been for some weeks
past with my old stomach-disorder i had certainly else before now have
done myself the honour you wonder i have not done myself lady betty 
who would have accompanied me for we have laid it all out has been
exceedingly busy in her law-affair her antagonist who is actually on
the spot having been making proposals for an accommodation but you may
assure yourself that when our dear relation-elect shall be entered upon
the new habitation you tell me of we will do ourselves the honour of
visiting her and if any delay arises from the dear lady's want of
courage which considering her man let me tell you may very well be 
we will endeavour to inspire her with it and be sponsors for you for 
cousin i believe you have need to be christened over again before you
are entitled to so great a blessing what think you 

just now my lord tells me he will dispatch a man on purpose with his
letter to-morrow so i needed not to have written but now i have let
it go and by empson who sets out directly on his return to town 

my best compliments and sister's to the most deserving lady in the
world  you will need no other direction to the person meant  conclude me

your affectionate cousin and servant 
charl montague 


 


thou seest how seasonably this letter comes i hope my lord will write
nothing but what i may show to my beloved i have actually sent her up
this letter of charlotte's and hope for happy effects from it 

r l 


 


 the lady in her next letter gives miss howe an account of what passed
 between mr lovelace and herself she resents his behaviour with her
 usual dignity but when she comes to mention mr mennell's letter 
 she re-urges miss howe to perfect her scheme for her deliverance 
 being resolved to leave him but dating again on his sending up to
 her miss montague's letter she alters her mind and desires her to
 suspend for the present her application to mrs townsend  

i had begun says she to suspect all he had said of mrs fretchville and
her house and even mr mennell himself though so well-appearing a man 
but now that i find mr lovelace has apprized his relations of his intent
to take it and had engaged some of the ladies to visit me there i could
hardly forbear blaming myself for censuring him as capable of so vile an
imposture but may he not thank himself for acting so very
unaccountably and taking such needlessly-awry steps as he had done 
embarrassing as i told him his own meanings if they were good 



letter l

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wednesday may 24 


 he gives his friend an account of their interview that morning and of
 the happy effects of his cousin montague's letter in his favour her
 reserves however he tells him are not absolutely banished but
 this he imputes to form  

it is not in the power of woman says he to be altogether sincere on
these occasions but why do they think it so great a disgrace to be
found out to be really what they are 

i regretted the illness of mrs fretchville as the intention i had to
fix her dear self in the house before the happy knot was tied would have
set her in that independence in appearance as well as fact which was
necessary to show to all the world that her choice was free and as the
ladies of my family would have been proud to make their court to her
there while the settlements and our equipages were preparing but on
any other account there was no great matter in it since when my happy
day was over we could with so much convenience go down to the lawn to
my lord m s and to lady sarah's or lady betty's in turn which would
give full time to provide ourselves with servants and other
accommodations 

how sweetly the charmer listened 

i asked her if she had had the small-pox 

ten thousand pounds the worse in my estimation thought i if she has
not for no one of her charming graces can i dispense with 

twas always a doubtful point with her mother and mrs norton she owned 
but although she was not afraid of it she chose not unnecessarily to
rush into places where it was 

right thought i else i said it would not have been amiss for her to
see the house before she went into the country for if she liked it not 
i was not obliged to have it 

she asked if she might take a copy of miss montague's letter 

i said she might keep the letter itself and send it to miss howe if
she pleased for that i suppose was her intention 

she bowed her head to me 

there jack i shall have her courtesy to me by-and-by i question not 
what a-devil had i to do to terrify the sweet creature by my termagant
projects yet it was not amiss i believe to make her afraid of me 
she says i am an unpolite man and every polite instance from such a
one is deemed a favour 

talking of the settlements i told her i had rather that pritchard
 mentioned by my cousin charlotte had not been consulted on this
occasion pritchard indeed was a very honest man and had been for a
generation in the family and knew of the estates and the condition of
them better than either my lord or myself but pritchard like other old
men was diffident and slow and valued himself upon his skill as a
draughts-man and for the sake of the paltry reputation must have all
his forms preserved were an imperial crown to depend upon his dispatch 

i kissed her unrepulsing hand no less than five times during this
conversation lord jack how my generous heart ran over she was quite
obliging at parting she in a manner asked me leave to retire to
reperuse charlotte's letter i think she bent her knees to me but i
won't be sure how happy might we both have been long ago had the dear
creature been always as complaisant to me for i do love respect and 
whether i deserve it or not always had it till i knew this proud
beauty 

and now belford are we in a train or the deuce is in it every
fortified town has its strong and its weak place i have carried on my
attacks against the impregnable parts i have not doubt but i shall
either shine or smuggle her out of her cloke since she and miss howe
have intended to employ a smuggler against me all we wait for now is
my lord's letter 

but i had like to have forgot to tell thee that we have been not a
little alarmed by some inquiries that have been made after me and my
beloved by a man of good appearance who yesterday procured a tradesman
in the neighbourhood to send for dorcas of whom he asked several
questions relating to us particularly as we boarded and lodged in one
house whether we were married 

this has given my beloved great uneasiness and i could not help
observing upon it to her how right a thing it was that we had given out
below that we were married the inquiry most probably i said was from
her brother's quarter and now perhaps that our marriage was owned we
should hear no more of his machinations the person it seems was
curious to know the day that the ceremony was performed but dorcas
refused to give him any other particulars than that we were married and
she was the more reserved as he declined to tell her the motives of his
inquiry 



letter li

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
may 24 


the devil take this uncle of mine he has at last sent me a letter which
i cannot show without exposing the head of our family for a fool a
confounded parcel of pop-guns has he let off upon me i was in hopes he
had exhausted his whole stock of this sort in his letter to you to keep
it back to delay sending it till he had recollected all this farrago of
nonsense confound his wisdom of nations if so much of it is to be
scraped together in disgrace of itself to make one egregious simpleton 
 but i am glad i am fortified with this piece of flagrant folly 
however since in all human affairs the convenient are so mingled that
there is no having the one without the other 

i have already offered the bill enclosed in it to my beloved and read to
her part of the letter but she refused the bill and as i am in cash
myself i shall return it she seemed very desirous to peruse the whole
letter and when i told her that were it not for exposing the writer 
i would oblige her she said it would not be exposing his lordship to
show it to her and that she always preferred the heart to the head i
knew her meaning but did not thank her for it 

all that makes for me in it i will transcribe for her yet hang it she
shall have the letter and my soul with it for one consenting kiss 


 


she has got the letter from me without the reward deuce take me if i
had the courage to propose the condition a new character this of
bashfulness in thy friend i see that a truly modest woman may make
even a confident man keep his distance by my soul belford i believe 
that nine women in ten who fall fall either from their own vanity or
levity or for want of circumspection and proper reserves 


 


i did intend to take my reward on her returning a letter so favourable
to us both but she sent it to me sealed up by dorcas i might have
thought that there were two or three hints in it that she would be too
nice immediately to appear to i send it to thee and here will stop 
to give thee time to read it return it as soon as thou hast perused it 



letter lii

lord m to robert lovelace esq 
tuesday may 23 


it is a long lane that has no turning do not despise me for my proverbs
 you know i was always fond of them and if you had been so too it
would have been the better for you let me tell you i dare swear the
fine lady you are so likely to be soon happy with will be far from
despising them for i am told that she writes well and that all her
letters are full of sentences god convert you for nobody but he and
this lady can 

i have no manner of doubt but that you will marry as your father and
all your ancestors did before you else you would have had no title to
be my heir nor can your descendants have any title to be your's unless
they are legitimate that's worth your remembrance sir no man is
always a fool every man is sometimes but your follies i hope are now
at an end 

i know you have vowed revenge against this fine lady's family but no
more of that now you must look upon them all as your relations and
forgive and forget and when they see you make a good husband and a good
father  which god send for all our sakes   they will wonder at their
nonsensical antipathy and beg your pardon but while they think you a
vile fellow and a rake how can they either love you or excuse their
daughter 

and methinks i could wish to give a word of comfort to the lady who 
doubtless must be under great fears how she shall be able to hold in
such a wild creature as you have hitherto been i would hint to her 
that by strong arguments and gentle words she may do any thing with
you for though you are apt to be hot gentle words will cool you and
bring you into the temper that is necessary for your cure 

would to god my poor lady your aunt who is dead and gone had been a
proper patient for the same remedy god rest her soul no reflections
upon her memory worth is best known by want i know her's now and if
i had went first she would by this time have known mine 

there is great wisdom in that saying god send me a friend that may tell
me of my faults if not an enemy and he will not that i am your
enemy and that you well know the more noble any one is the more
humble so bear with me if you would be thought noble am i not your
uncle and do i not design to be better to you than your father could be 
nay i will be your father too when the happy day comes since you
desire it and pray make my compliments to my dear niece and tell her i
wonder much that she has so long deferred your happiness 

pray let her know as that i will present her not you either my
lancashire seat or the lawn in hertfordshire and settle upon her a
thousand pounds a year penny-rents to show her that we are not a family
to take base advantages and you may have writings drawn and settle as
you will honest pritchard has the rent-roll of both these estates and
as he has been a good old servant i recommend him to your lady's favour 
i have already consulted him he will tell you what is best for you and
most pleasing to me 

i am still very bad with my gout but will come in a litter as soon as
the day is fixed it would be the joy of my heart to join your hands 
and let me tell you if you do not make the best of husbands to so good
a young lady and one who has had so much courage for your sake i will
renounce you and settle all i can upon her and her's by you and leave
you out of the question 

if any thing be wanting for your further security i am ready to give it 
though you know that my word has always been looked upon as my bond 
and when the harlowes know all this let us see whether they are able to
blush and take shame to themselves 

lady sarah and lady betty want only to know the day to make all the
country round them blaze and all their tenants mad and if any one of
mine be sober upon the occasion pritchard shall eject him and on the
birth of the first child if a son i will do something more for you and
repeat all our rejoicings 

i ought indeed to have written sooner but i knew that if you thought
me long and were in haste as to your nuptials you would write and tell
me so but my gout was very troublesome and i am but a slow writer you
know at best for composing is a thing that though formerly i was very
ready at it as my lord lexington used to say yet having left it off a
great while i am not so now and i chose on this occasion to write
all out of my own hand and memory and to give you my best advice for i
may never have such an opportunity again you have had  god mend you   a
strange way of turning your back upon all i have said this once i hope 
you will be more attentive to the advice i give you for your own good 

i have still another end nay two other ends 

the one was that now you are upon the borders of wedlock as i may say 
and all your wild oats will be sown i would give you some instructions
as to your public as well as private behaviour in life which intending
you so much good as i do you ought to hear and perhaps would never have
listened to on any less extraordinary occasion 

the second is that your dear lady-elect who is it seems herself so fine
and so sententious a writer will see by this that it is not our faults 
nor for want of the best advice that you was not a better man than you
have hitherto been 

and now in a few words for the conduct i would wish you to follow in
public as well as in private if you would think me worthy of advising 
 it shall be short so be not uneasy 

as to the private life love your lady as she deserves let your actions
praise you be a good husband and so give the lie to all your enemies 
and make them ashamed of their scandals and let us have pride in
saying that miss harlowe has not done either herself or family any
discredit by coming among us do this and i and lady sarah and lady
betty will love you for ever 

as to your public conduct this as follows is what i could wish but i
reckon your lady's wisdom will put us both right no disparagement sir 
since with all your wit you have not hitherto shown much wisdom you
know 

get into parliament as soon as you can for you have talons to make a
great figure there who so proper to assist in making new holding laws 
as those whom no law in being could hold 

then for so long as you will give attendance in st stephen's chapel 
its being called a chapel i hope will not disgust you i am sure i have
known many a riot there a speaker has a hard time of it but we peers
have more decorum but what was i going to say i must go back 

for so long as you will give your attendance in parliament for so long
will you be out of mischief out of private mischief at least and may
st stephen's fate be your's if you wilfully do public mischief 

when a new election comes you will have two or three boroughs you know 
to choose out of but if you stay till then i had rather you were for
the shire 

you will have interest enough i am sure and being so handsome a man 
the women will make their husbands vote for you 

i shall long to read your speeches i expect you will speak if occasion
offer the very first day you want no courage and think highly enough
of yourself and lowly enough of every body else to speak on all
occasions 

as to the methods of the house you have spirit enough i fear to be too
much above them take care of that i don't so much fear your want of
good-manners to men you want no decency if they don't provoke you as
to that i wish you would only learn to be as patient of contradiction
from others as you would have other people be to you 

although i would not have you to be a courtier neither would i have you
to be a malcontent i remember for i have it down what my old friend
archibald hutcheson said and it was a very good saying to mr 
secretary craggs i think it was i look upon an administration as
entitled to every vote i can with good conscience give it for a house of
commons should not needlessly put drags upon the wheels of government 
and when i have not given it my vote it was with regret and for my
country's sake i wished with all my heart the measure had been such as i
could have approved 

and another saying he had which was this neither can an opposition 
neither can a ministry be always wrong to be a plumb man therefore
with either is an infallible mark that that man must mean more and
worse than he will own he does mean 

are these sayings bad sir are they to be despised well then why
should i be despised for remembering them and quoting them as i love to
do let me tell you if you loved my company more than you do you would
not be the worse for it i may say so without any vanity since it is
other men's wisdom and not my own that i am so fond of 

but to add a word or two more on this occasion and i may never have such
another for you must read this through love honest men and herd with
them in the house and out of the house by whatever names they be
dignified or distinguished keep good men company and you shall be out
of their number but did i or did i not write this before writing 
at so many different times and such a quantity one may forget 

you may come in for the title when i am dead and gone god help me so i
would have you keep an equilibrium if once you get the name of being a
fine speaker you may have any thing and to be sure you have naturally
a great deal of elocution a tongue that would delude an angel as the
women say to their sorrow some of them poor creatures a leading man
in the house of commons is a very important character because that house
has the giving of money and money makes the mare to go ay and queens
and kings too sometimes to go in a manner very different from what they
might otherwise choose to go let me tell you 

however methinks i would not have you take a place neither it will
double your value and your interest if it be believed that you will
not for as you will then stand in no man's way you will have no envy 
but pure sterling respect and both sides will court you 

for your part you will not want a place as some others do to piece up
their broken fortunes if you can now live reputably upon two thousand
pounds a year it will be hard if you cannot hereafter live upon seven or
eight less you will not have if you oblige me as now by marrying so
fine a lady very much you will and all this and above lady betty's and
lady sarah's favours what in the name of wonder could possibly
possess the proud harlowes that son that son of theirs but for his
dear sister's sake i will say no more of him 

i never was offered a place myself and the only one i would have taken 
had i been offered it was master of the buckhounds for i loved hunting
when i was young and it carries a good sound with it for us who live in
the country often have i thought of that excellent old adage he that
eats the king's goose shall be choked with his feathers i wish to the
lord this was thoroughly considered by place-hunters it would be better
for them and for their poor families 

i could say a great deal more and all equally to the purpose but
really i am tired and so i doubt are you and besides i would reserve
something for conversation 

my nieces montague and lady sarah and lady betty join in compliments to
my niece that is to be if she would choose to have the knot tied among
us pray tell her that we shall all see it securely done and we will
make all the country ring and blaze for a week together but so i
believe i said before 

if any thing further may be needful toward promoting your reciprocal
felicity let me know it and how you order about the day and all that 
the enclosed bill is very much at your service tis payable at sight 
as whatever else you may have occasion for shall be 

so god bless you both and make things as convenient to my gout as you
can though be it whenever it will i will hobble to you for i long to
see you and still more to see my niece and am in expectation of that
happy opportunity 

your most affectionate uncle
m 



letter liii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
thursday may 25 


thou seest belford how we now drive before the wind the dear creature
now comes almost at the first word whenever i desire the honour of her
company i told her last night that apprehending delay from pritchard's
slowness i was determined to leave it to my lord to make his compliments
in his own way and had actually that afternoon put my writings into the
hands of a very eminent lawyer counsellor willians with directions for
him to draw up settlements from my own estate and conformably to those
of my mother which i put into his hands at the same time it had been 
i assured her no small part of my concern that her frequent
displeasure and our mutual misapprehensions had hindered me from
advising with her before on this subject indeed indeed my dearest
life said i you have hitherto afforded me but a very thorny courtship 

she was silent kindly silent for well know i that she could have
recriminated upon me with a vengeance but i was willing to see if she
were not loth to disoblige me now i comforted myself i said with the
hopes that all my difficulties were now over and that every past
disobligation would be buried in oblivion 

now belford i have actually deposited these writings with counsellor
williams and i expect the draughts in a week at farthest so shall be
doubly armed for if i attempt and fail these shall be ready to throw
in to make her have patience with me till i can try again 

i have more contrivances still in embryo i could tell thee of an
hundred and yet hold another hundred in petto to pop in as i go along 
to excite thy surprize and to keep up thy attention nor rave thou at
me but if thou art my friend think of miss howe's letters and of her
smuggling scheme all owing to my fair captive's informations
incitements am i not a villain a fool a beelzebub with them already 
 yet no harm done by me nor so much as attempted 

every thing of this nature the dear creature answered with a downcast
eye and a blushing cheek she left to me 

i proposed my lord's chapel for the celebration where we might have the
presence of lady betty lady sarah and my two cousins montague 

she seemed not to favour a public celebration and waved this subject for
the present i doubted not but she would be as willing as i to decline a
public wedding so i pressed not this matter farther just then 

but patterns i actually produced and a jeweller was to bring as this day
several sets of jewels for her choice but the patterns she would not
open she sighed at the mention of them the second patterns she said 
that had been offered to her and very peremptorily forbid the
jeweller's coming as well as declined my offer of causing my mother's to
be new-set at least for the present 


 see vol i letter xli 


i do assure thee belford i was in earnest in all this my whole estate
is nothing to me put in competition with her hoped-for favour 

she then told me that she had put into writing her opinion of my general
proposals and there had expressed her mind as to clothes and jewels but
on my strange behaviour to her for no cause that she knew of on sunday
night she had torn the paper in two 

i earnestly pressed her to let me be favoured with a sight of this paper 
torn as it was and after some hesitation she withdrew and sent it to
me by dorcas 

i perused it again it was in a manner new to me though i had read it
so lately and by my soul i could hardly stand it an hundred
admirable creatures i called her to myself but i charge thee write not
a word to me in her favour if thou meanest her well for if i spare
her it must be all ex mero motu 

you may easily suppose when i was re-admitted to her presence that i
ran over in her praises and in vows of gratitude and everlasting love 
but here's the devil she still receives all i say with reserve or if
it be not with reserve she receives it so much as her due that she is
not at all raised by it some women are undone by praise by flattery 
i myself a man am proud of praise perhaps thou wilt say that those
are most proud of it who least deserve it as those are of riches and
grandeur who are not born to either i own that to be superior to these
foibles it requires a soul have i not then a soul surely i have 
let me then be considered as an exception to the rule 

now have i foundation to go upon in my terms my lord in the exuberance
of his generosity mentions a thousand pounds a year penny-rents this i
know that were i to marry this lady he would rather settle upon her all
he has a mind to settle than upon me he has even threatened that if
i prove not a good husband to her he will leave all he can at his death
from me to her yet considers not that a woman so perfect can never be
displeased with her husband but to his disgrace for who will blame her 
 another reason why a lovelace should not wish to marry a clarissa 

but what a pretty fellow of an uncle is this foolish peer to think of
making a wife independent of her emperor and a rebel of course yet
smarted himself for an error of this kind 

my beloved in her torn paper mentions but two hundred pounds a year 
for her separate use i insisted upon her naming a larger sum she said
it might be three and i for fear she should suspect very large offers 
named only five but added the entire disposal of all arrears in her
father's hands for the benefit of mrs norton or whom she pleased 

she said that the good woman would be uneasy if any thing more than a
competency were done for her she was more for suiting all her
dispositions of this kind she said to the usual way of life of the
person to go beyond it was but to put the benefited upon projects 
or to make them awkward in a new state when they might shine in that to
which they were accustomed and to put it into so good a mother's power
to give her son a beginning in his business at a proper time yet to
leave her something for herself to set her above want or above the
necessity of taking back from her child what she had been enabled to
bestow upon him would be the height of such a worthy parent's ambition 

here's prudence here's judgment in so young a creature how do i hate
the harlowes for producing such an angel o why why did she refuse my
sincere address to tie the knot before we came to this house 

but yet what mortifies my pride is that this exalted creature if i
were to marry her would not be governed in her behaviour to me by love 
but by generosity merely or by blind duty and had rather live single 
than be mine 

i cannot bear this i would have the woman whom i honour with my name 
if ever i confer this honour upon any forego even her superior duties
for me i would have her look after me when i go out as far as she can
see me as my rosebud after her johnny and meet me at my return with
rapture i would be the subject of her dreams as well as of her waking
thoughts i would have her think every moment lost that is not passed
with me sing to me read to me play to me when i pleased no joy so
great as in obeying me when i should be inclined to love overwhelm me
with it when to be serious or solitary if apprehensive of intrusion 
retiring at a nod approaching me only if i smiled encouragement steal
into my presence with silence out of it if not noticed on tiptoe be
a lady easy to all my pleasures and valuing those most who most
contributed to them only sighing in private that it was not herself at
the time thus of old did the contending wives of the honest patriarchs 
each recommending her handmaid to her lord as she thought it would
oblige him and looking upon the genial product as her own 

the gentle waller says women are born to be controuled gentle as he
was he knew that a tyrant husband makes a dutiful wife and why do
the sex love rakes but because they know how to direct their uncertain
wills and manage them 


 


another agreeable conversation the day of days the subject as to
fixing a particular one that need not be done my charmer says till the
settlements are completed as to marrying at my lord's chapel the
ladies of my family present that would be making a public affair of it 
and the dear creature observed with regret that it seemed to be my
lord's intention to make it so 

it could not be imagined i said but that his lordship's setting out in
a litter and coming to town as well as his taste for glare and the joy
he would take to see me married at last and to her dear self would give
it as much the air of a public marriage as if the ceremony were performed
at his own chapel all the ladies present 

i cannot said she endure the thoughts of a public day it will carry
with it an air of insult upon my whole family and for my part if my
lord will not take it amiss  and perhaps he will not as the motion came
not from himself but from you mr lovelace   i will very willingly
dispense with his lordship's presence the rather as dress and
appearance will then be unnecessary for i cannot bear to think of
decking my person while my parents are in tears 

how excellent this yet do not her parents richly deserve to be in
tears 

see belford with so charming a niceness we might have been a long time
ago upon the verge of the state and yet found a great deal to do before
we entered into it 

all obedience all resignation no will but her's i withdrew and wrote
directly to my lord and she not disapproving of it i sent it away the
purport as follows for i took no copy 

that i was much obliged to his lordship for his intended goodness to me
on an occasion the most solemn of my life that the admirable lady whom
he so justly praised thought his lordship's proposals in her favour too
high that she chose not to make a public appearance if without
disobliging my friends she could avoid it till a reconciliation with
her own could be effected that although she expressed a grateful sense
of his lordship's consent to give her to me with his own hand yet 
presuming that the motive to this kind intention was rather to do her
honour than it otherwise would have been his own choice especially as
travelling would be at this time so inconvenient to him she thought it
advisable to save his lordship trouble on this occasion and hoped he
would take as meant her declining the favour 

that the lawn will be most acceptable to us both to retire to and the
rather as it is so to his lordship 

but if he pleases the jointure may be made from my own estate leaving
to his lordship's goodness the alternative 

i conclude with telling him that i had offered to present the lady his
lordship's bill but on her declining to accept of it having myself no
present occasion for it i return it enclosed with my thanks etc 

and is not this going a plaguy length what a figure should i make in
rakish annals if at last i should be caught in my own gin 

the sex may say what they will but a poor innocent fellow had need to
take great care of himself when he dances upon the edge of the
matrimonial precipice many a faint-hearted man when he began to jest 
or only designed to ape gallantry has been forced into earnest by being
over-prompt and taken at his word not knowing how to own that he meant
less than the lady supposed he meant i am the better enabled to judge
that this must have been the case of many a sneaking varlet because i 
who know the female world as well as any man in it of my standing am so
frequently in doubt of myself and know not what to make of the matter 

then these little sly rogues how they lie couchant ready to spring upon
us harmless fellows the moment we are in their reach when the ice is
once broken for them how swiftly can they make to port mean time the
subject they can least speak to they most think of nor can you talk of
the ceremony before they have laid out in their minds how it is all to
be little saucy-faced designers how first they draw themselves in 
then us 

but be all these things as they will lord m never in his life received
so handsome a letter as this from his nephew

lovelace 


 


 the lady after having given to miss howe on the particulars contained
 in mr lovelace's last letter thus expresses herself  

a principal consolation arising from these favourable appearances is 
that i who have now but one only friend shall most probably and if it
be not my own fault have as many new ones as there are persons in mr 
lovelace's family and this whether mr lovelace treat me kindly or not 
and who knows but that by degrees those new friends by their rank and
merit may have weight enough to get me restored to the favour of my
relations till which can be effected i shall not be tolerably easy 
happy i never expect to be mr lovelace's mind and mine are vastly
different different in essentials 

but as matters are at present circumstanced i pray you my dear friend 
to keep to yourself every thing that might bring discredit to him if
revealed better any body expose a man than a wife if i am to be his 
and what is said by you will be thought to come from me 

it shall be my constant prayer that all the felicities which this world
can afford may be your's and that the almighty will never suffer you nor
your's to the remotest posterity to want such a friend as my anna howe
has been to

her
clarissa harlowe 



letter liv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


and now that my beloved seems secure in my net for my project upon the
vixen miss howe and upon her mother in which the officious prancer
hickman is to come in for a dash 

but why upon her mother methinks thou askest who unknown to herself 
has only acted by the impulse through thy agent joseph leman upon the
folly of old tony the uncle 

no matter for that she believes she acts upon her own judgment and
deserves to be punished for pretending to judgment when she has none 
every living soul but myself i can tell thee shall be punished that
treats either cruelly or disrespectfully so adored a lady what a
plague is it not enough that she is teased and tormented in person by
me 

i have already broken the matter to our three confederates as a
supposed not a resolved-on case indeed and yet they know that with
me in a piece of mischief execution with its swiftest feel is seldom
three paces behind projection which hardly ever limps neither 

mowbray is not against it it is a scheme he says worthy of us and we
have not done any thing for a good while that has made a noise 

belton indeed hesitates a little because matters go wrong between him
and his thomasine and the poor fellow has not the courage to have his
sore place probed to the bottom 

tourville has started a fresh game and shrugs his shoulders and should
not choose to go abroad at present if i please for i apprehend that
 from the nature of the project there will be a kind of necessity to
travel till all is blown over 

to me one country is as good as another and i shall soon i suppose 
choose to quit this paltry island except the mistress of my fate will
consent to cohabit at home and so lay me under no necessity of
surprising her into foreign parts travelling thou knowest gives the
sexes charming opportunities of being familiar with one another a very
few days and nights must now decide all matters betwixt me and my fair
inimitable 

doleman who can act in these causes only as chamber-counsel will inform
us by pen and ink  his right hand and right side having not yet been
struck and the other side beginning to be sensible  of all that shall
occur in our absence 

as for thee we had rather have thy company than not for although thou
art a wretched fellow at contrivance yet art thou intrepid at execution 
but as thy present engagements make thy attendance uncertain i am not
for making thy part necessary to our scheme but for leaving thee to come
after us when abroad i know thou canst not long live without us 

the project in short is this mrs howe has an elder sister in the
isle of wight who is lately a widow and i am well informed that the
mother and daughter have engaged before the latter is married to pay a
visit to this lady who is rich and intends miss for her heiress and in
the interim will make her some valuable presents on her approaching
nuptials which as mrs howe who loves money more than any thing but
herself told one of my acquaintance would be worth fetching 

now jack nothing more need be done than to hire a little trim vessel 
which shall sail a pleasuring backward and forward to portsmouth spithead 
and the isle of wight for a week or fortnight before we enter
upon our parts of the plot and as mrs howe will be for making the best
bargain she can for her passage the master of the vessel may have orders
 as a perquisite allowed him by his owners to take what she will give 
and the master's name be it what it will shall be ganmore on the
occasion for i know a rogue of that name who is not obliged to be of
any country any more than we 

well then we will imagine them on board i will be there in disguise 
they know not any of ye four supposing the scheme so inviting that
thou canst be one 

tis plaguy hard if we cannot find or make a storm 

perhaps they will be sea-sick but whether they be or not no doubt they
will keep their cabin 

here will be mrs howe miss howe mr hickman a maid and a footman i
suppose and thus we will order it 

i know it will be hard weather i know it will and before there can be
the least suspicion of the matter we shall be in sight of guernsey 
jersey dieppe cherbourg or any where on the french coast that it shall
please us to agree with the winds to blow us and then securing the
footman and the women being separated one of us according to lots that
may be cast shall overcome either by persuasion or force the maid
servant that will be no hard task and she is a likely wench  i have
seen her often   one mrs howe nor can there be much difficulty there 
for she is full of health and life and has been long a widow another 
 that says the princely lion must be i   the saucy daughter who will
be much too frightened to make great resistance  violent spirits in
that sex are seldom true spirits tis but where they can   and after
beating about the coast for three or four days for recreation's sake and
to make sure work till we see our sullen birds begin to eat and sip we
will set them all ashore where it will be most convenient sell the
vessel  to mrs townsend's agents with all my heart or to some other
smugglers   or give it to ganmore and pursue our travels and tarry
abroad till all is hushed up 

now i know thou wilt make difficulties as it is thy way while it is
mine to conquer them my other vassals made theirs and i condescended
to obviate them as thus i will thine first stating them for thee
according to what i know of thy phlegm 

what in the first place wilt thou ask shall be done with hickman who
will be in full parade of dress and primness in order to show the old
aunt what a devilish clever fellow of a nephew she is to have 

what i'll tell thee hickman in good manners will leave the women in
their cabin and to show his courage with his breeding be upon deck 

well and suppose he is why then i hope it is easy for ganmore or any
body else myself suppose in my pea-jacket and great watch coat if any
other make scruple to do it while he stands in the way gaping and
staring like a novice to stumble against him and push him overboard 
 a rich thought is it not belford he is certainly plaguy officious
in the ladies' correspondence and i am informed plays double between
mother and daughter in fear of both dost not see him jack i do 
popping up and down his wig and hat floating by him and paddling 
pawing and dashing like a frighted mongrel i am afraid he never
ventured to learn to swim 

but thou wilt not drown the poor fellow wilt thou 

no no that is not necessary to the project i hate to do mischiefs
supererogatory the skiff shall be ready to save him while the vessel
keeps its course he shall be set on shore with the loss of wig and hat
only and of half his little wits at the place where he embarked or any
where else 

well but shall we not be in danger of being hanged for three such
enormous rapes although hickman should escape with only a bellyful of
sea-water 

yes to be sure when caught but is there any likelihood of that 
besides have we not been in danger before now for worse facts and what
is there in being only in danger if we actually were to appear in open
day in england before matters are made up there will be greater
likelihood that these women will not prosecute that they will for my
own part i should wish they may would not a brave fellow choose to
appear in court to such an arraignment confronting women who would do
credit to his attempt the country is more merciful in these cases than
in any others i should therefore like to put myself upon my country 

let me indulge in a few reflections upon what thou mayest think the worst
that can happen i will suppose that thou art one of us and that all
five are actually brought to trial on this occasion how bravely shall we
enter a court i at the head of you dressed out each man as if to his
wedding appearance you are sure of all the women old and young of
your side what brave fellows what fine gentlemen there goes a
charming handsome man meaning me to be sure who could find in their
hearts to hang such a gentleman as that whispers one lady sitting
perhaps on the right hand of the recorder  i suppose the scene to be in
london   while another disbelieves that any woman could fairly swear
against me all will crowd after me it will be each man's happiness if
ye shall chance to be bashful to be neglected i shall be found to be
the greatest criminal and my safety for which the general voice will be
engaged will be yours 

but then comes the triumph of triumphs that will make the accused look
up while the accusers are covered with confusion 

make room there stand by give back one receiving a rap another an
elbow half a score a push a piece 

enter the slow-moving hooded-faced down-looking plaintiffs 

and first the widow with a sorrowful countenance though half-veiled 
pitying her daughter more than herself the people the women
especially who on this occasion will be five-sixths of the spectators 
reproaching her you'd have the conscience would you to have five such
brave gentlemen as these hanged for you know not what 

next comes the poor maid who perhaps has been ravished twenty times
before and had not appeared now but for company-sake mincing 
simpering weeping by turns not knowing whether she should be sorry
or glad 

but every eye dwells upon miss see see the handsome gentleman bows to
her 

to the very ground to be sure i shall bow and kiss my hand 

see her confusion see she turns from him ay that's because it is in
open court cries an arch one while others admire her ay that's a
girl worth venturing one's neck for 

then we shall be praised even the judges and the whole crowded bench 
will acquit us in their hearts and every single man wish he had been me 
 the women all the time disclaiming prosecution were the case to be
their own to be sure belford the sufferers cannot put half so good a
face upon the matter as we 

then what a noise will this matter make is it not enough suppose us
moving from the prison to the sessions-house to make a noble heart
thump it away most gloriously when such an one finds himself attended to
his trial by a parade of guards and officers of miens and aspects
warlike and unwarlike himself of their whole care and their business 
weapons in their hands some bright some rusty equally venerable for
their antiquity and inoffensiveness others of more authoritative
demeanour strutting before with fine painted staves shoals of people
following with a which is he whom the young lady appears against 
then let us look down look up look round which way we will we shall
see all the doors the shops the windows the sign-irons and balconies 
 garrets gutters and chimney-tops included all white-capt black-
hooded and periwigg'd or crop-ear'd up by the immobile vulgus while
the floating street-swarmers who have seen us pass by at one place run
with stretched-out necks and strained eye-balls a roundabout way and
elbow and shoulder themselves into places by which we have not passed in
order to obtain another sight of us every street continuing to pour out
its swarms of late-comers to add to the gathering snowball who are
content to take descriptions of our persons behaviour and countenances 
from those who had the good fortune to have been in time to see us 


 within these few years past a passage has been made from the prison to
the sessions-house whereby malefactors are carried into court without
going through the street lovelace's triumph on their supposed march
shows the wisdom of this alteration 


let me tell thee jack i see not why to judge according to our
principles and practices we should not be as much elated in our march 
were this to happen to us as others may be upon any other the most mob-
attracting occasion suppose a lord-mayor on his gawdy suppose a
victorious general or ambassador on his public entry suppose as i
began with the lowest the grandest parade that can be supposed a
coronation for in all these do not the royal guard the heroic
trained-bands the pendent clinging throngs of spectators with their
waving heads rolling to-and-fro from house-tops to house-bottoms and
street-ways as i have above described make the principal part of the
raree-show 

and let me ask thee if thou dost not think that either the mayor the
ambassador or the general would not make very pitiful figures on their
galas did not the trumpets and tabrets call together the canaille to
gaze at them nor perhaps should we be the most guilty heroes neither 
for who knows how the magistrate may have obtained his gold chain while
the general probably returns from cutting of throats and from murders 
sanctified by custom only caesar we are told had won at the age of
fifty-six when he was assassinated fifty pitched battles had taken by
assault above a thousand towns and slain near 1 200 000 men i suppose
exclusive of those who fell on his own side in slaying them are not you
and i jack innocent men and babes in swaddling-clothes compared to
caesar and to his predecessor in heroism alexander dubbed for murders
and depredation magnus 


 pliny gives this account putting the number of men slain at 1 100 092 
see also lipsius de constandia 


the principal difference that strikes me in the comparison between us and
the mayor the ambassador the general on their gawdies is that the
mob make a greater noise a louder huzzaing in the one case than the
other which is called acclamation and ends frequently in higher taste 
by throwing dead animals at one another before they disperse in which
they have as much joy as in the former part of the triumph while they
will attend us with all the marks of an awful or silent at most only a
whispering respect their mouths distended as if set open with gags 
and their voices generally lost in goggle-ey'd admiration 

well but suppose after all we are convicted what have we to do but
in time make over our estates that the sheriffs may not revel in our
spoils there is no fear of being hanged for such a crime as this while
we have money or friends and suppose even the worst that two or three
were to die have we not a chance each man of us to escape the
devil's in them if they'll hang five for ravishing three 

i know i shall get off for one were it but for family sake and being a
handsome fellow i shall have a dozen or two young maidens all dressed
in white go to court to beg my life and what a pretty show they will
make with their white hoods white gowns white petticoats white
scarves white gloves kneeling for me with their white handkerchiefs
at their eyes in two pretty rows as his majesty walks through them and
nods my pardon for their sakes and if once pardoned all is over for 
jack in a crime of this nature there lies no appeal as in a murder 

so thou seest the worst that can happen should we not make the grand
tour upon this occasion but stay and take our trials but it is most
likely that they will not prosecute at all if not no risque on our
side will be run only taking our pleasure abroad at the worst leaving
friends tired of us in order after a time to return to the same
friends endeared to us as we to them by absence 

this jack is my scheme at the first running i know it is capable of
improvement for example i can land these ladies in france whip over
before they can get a passage back or before hickman can have recovered
his fright and so find means to entrap my beloved on board and then all
will be right and i need not care if i were never to return to england 

memorandum to be considered of whether in order to complete my
 vengeance i cannot contrive to kidnap away either james harlowe or
 solmes or both a man jack would not go into exile for nothing 



letter lv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


if belford thou likest not my plot upon miss howe i have three or four
more as good in my own opinion better perhaps they will be in thine 
and so tis but getting loose from thy present engagement and thou shalt
pick and choose but as for thy three brethren they must do as i would
have them and so indeed must thou else why am i your general but i
will refer this subject to its proper season thou knowest that i never
absolutely conclude upon a project till tis time for execution and
then lightning strikes not quicker than i 

and now to the subject next my heart 

wilt thou believe me when i tell thee that i have so many contrivances
rising up and crowding upon me for preference with regard to my
gloriana that i hardly know which to choose i could tell thee of no
less than six princely ones any of which must do but as the dear
creature has not grudged giving me trouble i think i ought not in
gratitude to spare combustibles for her but on the contrary to make
her stare and stand aghast by springing three or four mines at once 

thou remembrest what shakespeare in his troilus and cressida makes
hector who however is not used to boast say to achilles in an
interview between them and which applied to this watchful lady and to
the vexation she has given me and to the certainty i now think i have of
subduing her will run thus supposing the charmer before me and i
meditating her sweet person from head to foot 

 henceforth o watchful fair-one guard thee well 
 for i'll not kill thee there nor there nor there 
 but by the zone that circles venus' waist 
 i'll kill thee ev'ry where yea o'er and o'er 
 thou wisest belford pardon me this brag 
 her watchfulness draws folly from my lips 
 but i'll endeavour deeds to match the words 
 or i may never 

then i imagine thee interposing to qualify my impatience as ajax did to
achilles 

 do not chafe thee cousin 
 and let these threats alone 
 till accident or purpose bring thee to it 

all that vexes me in the midst of my gloried-in devices is that there
is a sorry fellow in the world who has presumed to question whether the
prize when obtained is worthy of the pains it costs me yet knows with
what patience and trouble a bird-man will spread an acre of ground with
gins and snares set up his stalking horse his glasses plant his decoy-
birds and invite the feathered throng by his whistle and all his prize
at last the reward of early hours and of a whole morning's pains only
a simple linnet 

to be serious belford i must acknowledge that all our pursuits from
childhood to manhood are only trifles of different sort and sizes 
proportioned to our years and views but then is not a fine woman the
noblest trifle that ever was or could be obtained by man and to what
purpose do we say obtained if it be not in the way we wish for if a man
is rather to be her prize than she his 


 


and now belford what dost think 

that thou art a cursed fellow if 

if no if's but i shall be very sick to-morrow i shall faith 

sick why sick what a-devil shouldst thou be sick for 

for more good reasons than one jack 

i should be glad to hear but one sick quotha of all thy roguish
inventions i should not have thought of this 

perhaps thou thinkest my view to be to draw the lady to my bedside 
that's a trick of three or four thousand years old and i should find it
much more to my purpose if i could get to her's however i'll
condescend to make thee as wise as myself 

i am excessively disturbed about this smuggling scheme of miss howe i
have no doubt that my fair-one were i to make an attempt and miscarry 
will fly from me if she can i once believed she loved me but now i
doubt whether she does or not at least that it is with such an ardour 
as miss howe calls it as will make her overlook a premeditated fault 
should i be guilty of one 

and what will being sick do for thee 

have patience i don't intend to be so very bad as dorcas shall
represent me to be but yet i know i shall reach confoundedly and bring
up some clotted blood to be sure i shall break a vessel there's no
doubt of that and a bottle of eaton's styptic shall be sent for but no
doctor if she has humanity she will be concerned but if she has
love let it have been pushed ever so far back it will on this
occasion come forward and show itself not only in her eye but in
every line of her sweet face 

i will be very intrepid i will not fear death or any thing else i
will be sure of being well in an hour or two having formerly found great
benefit by this astringent medicine on occasion of an inward bruise by a
fall from my horse in hunting of which perhaps this malady may be the
remains and this will show her that though those about me may make the
most of it i do not and so can have no design in it 

well methinks thou sayest i begin to think tolerably of this device 

i knew thou wouldst when i explained myself another time prepare to
wonder and banish doubt 

now belford i shall expect that she will show some concern at the
broken vessel as it may be attended with fatal effects especially to
one so fiery in his temper as i have the reputation to be thought to be 
and the rather as i shall calmly attribute the accident to the harasses
and doubts under which i have laboured for some time past and this will
be a further proof of my love and will demand a grateful return 

and what then thou egregious contriver 

why then i shall have the less remorse if i am to use a little violence 
for can she deserve compassion who shows none 

and what if she shows a great deal of concern 

then shall i be in hopes of building on a good foundation love hides a
multitude of faults and diminishes those it cannot hide love when
acknowledged authorizes freedom and freedom begets freedom and i shall
then see how far i can go 

well but lovelace how the deuce wilt thou with that full health and
vigour of constitution and with that bloom in thy face make any body
believe thou art sick 

how why take a few grains of ipecacuanha enough to make me reach like
a fury 

good but how wilt thou manage to bring up blood and not hurt thyself 

foolish fellow are there no pigeons and chickens in every poulterer's
shop 

cry thy mercy 

but then i will be persuaded by mrs sinclair that i have of late
confined myself too much and so will have a chair called and be carried
to the park where i will try to walk half the length of the mall or so 
and in my return amuse myself at white's or the cocoa 

and what will this do 

questioning again i am afraid thou'rt an infidel belford why then
shall i not know if my beloved offers to go out in my absence and shall
i not see whether she receives me with tenderness at my return but this
is not all i have a foreboding that something affecting will happen
while i am out but of this more in its place 

and now belford wilt thou or wilt thou not allow that it is a right
thing to be sick lord jack so much delight do i take in my
contrivances that i shall be half sorry when the occasion for them is
over for never never shall i again have such charming exercise for my
invention 

mean time these plaguy women are so impertinent so full of reproaches 
that i know not how to do any thing but curse them and then truly 
they are for helping me out with some of their trite and vulgar
artifices sally particularly who pretends to be a mighty contriver 
has just now in an insolent manner told me on my rejecting her
proffered aids that i had no mind to conquer and that i was so wicked
as to intend to marry though i would not own it to her 

because this little devil made her first sacrifice at my altar she
thinks she may take any liberty with me and what makes her outrageous at
times is that i have for a long time studiously as she says slighted
her too-readily-offered favours but is it not very impudent in her to
think that i will be any man's successor it is not come to that
neither this thou knowest was always my rule once any other man's 
and i know it and never more mine it is for such as thou and thy
brethren to take up with harlots i have been always aiming at the
merit of a first discoverer 

the more devil i perhaps thou wilt say to endeavour to corrupt the
uncorrupted 

but i say not since hence i have but very few adulteries to answer
for 

one affair indeed at paris with a married lady  i believe i never told
thee of it  touched my conscience a little yet brought on by the spirit
of intrigue more than by sheer wickedness i'll give it thee in brief 

a french marquis somewhat in years employed by his court in a public
function at that of madrid had put his charming young new-married wife
under the controul and wardship as i may say of his insolent sister an
old prude 

i saw the lady at the opera i liked her at first sight and better at
second when i knew the situation she was in so pretending to make my
addresses to the prude got admittance to both 

the first thing i had to do was to compliment the prude into shyness by
complaints of shyness next to take advantage of the marquise's
situation between her husband's jealousy and his sister's arrogance and
to inspire her with resentment and as i hoped with a regard to my
person the french ladies have no dislike to intrigue 

the sister began to suspect me the lady had no mind to part with the
company of the only man who had been permitted to visit her and told me
of her sister's suspicions i put her upon concealing the prude as if
unknown to me in a closet in one of her own apartments locking her in 
and putting the key in her own pocket and she was to question me on the
sincerity of my professions to her sister in her sister's hearing 

she complied my mistress was locked up the lady and i took our
seats i owned fervent love and made high professions for the marquise
put it home to me the prude was delighted with what she heard 

and how dost thou think it ended i took my advantage of the lady
herself who durst not for her life cry out and drew her after me to the
next apartment on pretence of going to seek her sister who all the time
was locked up in the closet 

no woman ever gave me a private meeting for nothing my dearest miss
harlowe excepted 

my ingenuity obtained my pardon the lady being unable to forbear
laughing throughout the whole affair to find both so uncommonly tricked 
her gaoleress her prisoner safe locked up and as much pleased as either
of us 

the english jack do not often out-wit the french 

we had contrivances afterwards equally ingenious in which the lady the
ice once broken  once subdued always subdued  co-operated but a more
tender tell-tale revealed the secret revealed it before the marquise
could cover the disgrace the sister was inveterate the husband
irreconcilable in every respect unfit for a husband even for a french
one made perhaps more delicate to these particulars by the customs of
a people among whom he was then resident so contrary to those of his own
countrymen she was obliged to throw herself into my protection nor
thought herself unhappy in it till childbed pangs seized her then
penitence and death overtook her the same hour 

excuse a tear belford she deserved a better fate what hath such a
vile inexorable husband to answer for the sister was punished
effectually that pleases me on reflection the sister effectually
punished but perhaps i have told thee this story before 


contents of volume v


letter i lovelace to belford 
an agreeable airing with the lady delightfully easy she obsequiously
respectful he miss howe's plot now no longer his terror gives the
particulars of their agreeable conversation while abroad 

letter ii from the same 
an account of his ipecacuanha plot instructs dorcas how to act surprise
and terror monosyllables and trisyllables to what likened politeness
lives not in a storm proclamation criers the lady now sees she loves
him her generous tenderness for him he has now credit for a new
score defies mrs townsend 

letter iii clarissa to miss howe 
acknowledged tenderness for lovelace love for a man of errors
punishable 

letter iv lovelace to belford 
suspicious inquiry after him and the lady by a servant in livery from one
captain tomlinson her terrors on the occasion his alarming
management she resolves not to stir abroad he exults upon her not
being willing to leave him 

letter v vi from the same 
arrival of captain tomlinson with a pretended commission from mr john
harlowe to set on foot a general reconciliation provided he can be
convinced that they are actually married different conversations on this
occasion the lady insists that the truth be told to tomlinson she
carries her point through to the disappointment of one of his private
views he forms great hopes of success from the effects of his
ipecacuanha contrivance 

letter vii lovelace to belford 
he makes such a fair representation to tomlinson of the situation between
him and the lady behaves so plausibly and makes an overture so
generous that she is all kindness and unreserved to him her affecting
exultation on her amended prospects his unusual sensibility upon it 
reflection on the good effects of education pride an excellent
substitute to virtue 

letter viii from the same 
who tomlinson is again makes belford object in order to explain his
designs by answering the objections john harlowe a sly sinner hard-
hearted reasons for giving the lady a gleam of joy illustrated by a
story of two sovereigns at war 

extracts from clarissa's letter to miss howe she rejoices in her
present agreeable prospects attributes much to mr hickman describes
captain tomlinson gives a character of lovelace  which is necessary to
be attended to especially by those who have thought favourably of him
for some of his liberal actions and hardly of her for the distance she
at first kept him at  

letter ix lovelace to belford 
letter from lord m his further arts and precautions his happy day
promised to be soon his opinion of the clergy and of going to church 
she pities every body who wants pity loves every body he owns he
should be the happiest of men could he get over his prejudices against
matrimony draughts of settlements ludicrously accounts for the reason
why she refuses to hear them read to her law and gospel two different
things sally flings her handkerchief in his face 

letter x from the same 
has made the lady more than once look about her she owns that he is
more than indifferent to her checks him with sweetness of temper for
his encroaching freedoms her proof of true love he ridicules marriage
purity severely reflects upon public freedoms between men and their
wives advantage he once made upon such an occasion has been after a
license difficulty in procuring one great faults and great virtues
often in the same person he is willing to believe that women have no
souls his whimsical reasons 

letter xi lovelace to belford 
almost despairs of succeeding as he had hoped by love and gentleness 
praises her modesty his encroaching freedoms resented by her the
woman he observes who resents not initiatory freedoms must be lost 
he reasons in his free way upon her delicacy art of the eastern
monarchs 

letter xii from the same 
a letter from captain tomlinson makes all up her uncle harlowe's
pretended proposal big with art and plausible delusion she acquiesces
in it he writes to the pretended tomlinson on an affecting hint of
her's requesting that her uncle harlowe would in person give his niece
to him or permit tomlinson to be his proxy on the occasion and now for
a little of mine he says which he has ready to spring 

letter xiii belford to lovelace 
again earnestly expostulates with him in the lady's favour remembers
and applauds the part she bore in the conversation at his collation the
frothy wit of libertines how despicable censures the folly the
weakness the grossness the unpermanency of sensual love calls some of
his contrivances trite stale and poor beseeches him to remove her
from the vile house how many dreadful stories could the horrid sinclair
tell the sex serious reflections on the dying state of his uncle 

letter xiv lovelace to belford 
cannot yet procure a license has secured a retreat if not victory 
defends in anger the simplicity of his inventive contrivances enters
upon his general defence compared with the principles and practices of
other libertines heroes and warlike kings worse men than he epitome
of his and the lady's story after ten years' cohabitation caution to
those who would censure him had the sex made virtue a recommendation to
their favour he says he should have had a greater regard to his morals
than he has had 

letter xv from the same 
preparative to his little mine as he calls it loves to write to the
moment alarm begins affectedly terrified 

letter xvi from the same 
the lady frighted out of her bed by dreadful cries of fire she awes him
into decency on an extorted promise of forgiveness he leaves her 
repenting he returns but finds her door fastened what a triumph has
her sex obtained by her virtue but how will she see him next morning 
as he has given her 

letter xvii lovelace to belford 
dialogue with clarissa the door between them her letter to him she
will not see him for a week 

letter xviii from the same 
copies of letters that pass between them goes to the commons to try to
get the license she shall see him he declares on his return love
and compassion hard to be separated her fluctuating reasons on their
present situation is jealous of her superior qualities does justice
to her immovable virtue 

letter xix from the same 
the lady escaped his rage makes a solemn vow of revenge if once more
he gets her into his power his man will is gone in search of her his
hopes on what grounded he will advertise her describes her dress 
letter left behind her accuses her that is to say lovelace accuses
her of niceness prudery affectation 

letter xx from the same 
a letter from miss howe to clarissa falls into his hands which had it
come to her's would have laid open and detected all his designs in it
she acquits clarissa of prudery coquetry and undue reserve admires 
applauds blesses her for the example she has set for her sex and for
the credit she has done it by her conduct in the most difficult
situations 

 this letter may be considered as a kind of summary of clarissa's trials 
her persecutions and exemplary conduct hitherto and of mr lovelace's
intrigues plots and views so far as miss howe could be supposed to
know them or to guess at them  

a letter from lovelace which farther shows the fertility of his
contriving genius 

letter xxi clarissa to miss howe 
informs her of lovelace's villany and of her escape her only concern 
what the course she intends to pursue 

letter xxii lovelace to belford 
exults on hearing from his man will that the lady has refuged herself
at hampstead observations in a style of levity on some passages in the
letter she left behind her intimates that tomlinson is arrived to aid
his purposes the chariot is come and now dressed like a bridegroom 
attended by a footman she never saw he is already he says at
hampstead 

letter xxiii xxiv lovelace to belford 
exults on his contrivances by what means he gets into the lady's
presence at mrs moore's her terrors fits exclamations his
plausible tales to mrs moore and miss rawlins his intrepid behaviour
to the lady copies of letters from tomlinson and of pretended ones
from his own relations calculated to pacify and delude her 

letter xxv xxvi from the same 
his farther arts inventions and intrepidity she puts home questions
to him ungenerous and ungrateful she calls him he knows not the
value of the heart he had insulted he had a plain path before him 
after he had tricked her out of her father's house but that now her
mind was raised above fortune and above him  his precautionary
contrivances 

letter xxvii xxviii xxx xxxi xxxii from the same 
character of widow bevis prepossesses the women against miss howe 
leads them to think she is in love with him apt himself to think so 
and why women like not novices and why their vulgar aphorism
animadverted on tomlinson arrives artful conversation between them 
miss rawlins's prudery his forged letter in imitation of miss howe's 
no iv other contrivances to delude the lady and attach the women to
his party 


letter xxxiii xxxiv xxxv xxxvi from the same 
particulars of several interesting conversations between himself 
tomlinson and the lady artful management of the two former her noble
spirit he tells tomlinson before her that he never had any proof of
affection from her she frankly owns the regard she once had for him 
he had brought her  she tells tomlinson and him more than once to own
it to him nor did his own vanity she was sure permit him to doubt of
it he had kept her soul in suspense an hundred times  both men
affected in turn by her noble behaviour and great sentiments their
pleas prayers prostrations to move her to relent her distress 




the history

of

clarissa harlowe



letter i

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
friday evening 


just returned from an airing with my charmer complied with after great
importunity she was attended by the two nymphs they both topt their
parts kept their eyes within bounds made moral reflections now-and-
then o jack what devils are women when all tests are got over and we
have completely ruined them 

the coach carried us to hampstead to highgate to muswell-hill back to
hampstead to the upper-flask there in compliment to the nymphs my
beloved consented to alight and take a little repast then home early
by kentish-town 

delightfully easy she and so respectful and obliging i all the way and
as we walked out upon the heath to view the variegated prospects which
that agreeable elevation affords that she promised to take now-and-then
a little excursion with me i think miss howe i think said i to
myself every now-and-then as we walked that thy wicked devices are
superceded 

but let me give thee a few particulars of our conversation in the
circumrotation we took while in the coach she had received a letter
from miss howe yesterday i presumed 

she made no answer how happy should i think myself to be admitted into
their correspondence i would joyfully make an exchange of
communications 

so though i hoped not to succeed by her consent  and little did she
think i had so happily in part succeeded without it   i thought it not
amiss to urge for it for several reasons among others that i might
account to her for my constant employment at my pen in order to take off
her jealousy that she was the subject of thy correspondence and mine 
and that i might justify my secrecy and uncommunicativeness by her own 

i proceeded therefore that i loved familiar-letter-writing as i had
more than once told her above all the species of writing it was writing
from the heart without the fetters prescribed by method or study as
the very word cor-respondence implied not the heart only the soul was
in it nothing of body when friend writes to friend the mind impelling
sovereignly the vassal-fingers it was in short friendship recorded 
friendship given under hand and seal demonstrating that the parties were
under no apprehension of changing from time or accident when they so
liberally gave testimonies which would always be ready on failure or
infidelity to be turned against them for my own part it was the
principal diversion i had in her absence but for this innocent
amusement the distance she so frequently kept me at would have been
intolerable 

sally knew my drift and said she had had the honour to see two or three
of my letters and of mr belford's and she thought them the most
entertaining that she had ever read 

my friend belford i said had a happy talent in the letter-writing way 
and upon all subjects 

i expected my beloved would have been inquisitive after our subject but
 lying perdue as i saw not a word said she so i touched upon this
article myself 

our topics were various and diffuse sometimes upon literary articles
 she was very attentive upon this  sometimes upon the public
entertainments sometimes amusing each other with the fruits of the
different correspondencies we held with persons abroad with whom we
had contracted friendships sometimes upon the foibles and perfections
of our particular friends sometimes upon our own present and future
hopes sometimes aiming at humour and raillery upon each other it might
indeed appear to savour of vanity to suppose my letters would entertain
a lady of her delicacy and judgment but yet i could not but say that
perhaps she would be far from thinking so hardly of me as sometimes she
had seemed to do if she were to see the letters which generally passed
between mr belford and me  i hope jack thou hast more manners than to
give me the lie though but in thy heart  

she then spoke after declining my compliment in such a manner as only a
person can do who deserved it she said for her part she had always
thought me a man of sense  a man of sense jack what a niggardly
praise   and should therefore hope that when i wrote it exceeded
even my speech for that it was impossible be the letters written in as
easy and familiar a style as they would but that they must have that
advantage from sitting down to write them which prompt speech could not
always have she should think it very strange therefore if my letters
were barren of sentiment and as strange if i gave myself liberties upon
premeditation which could have no excuse at all but from a
thoughtlessness which itself wanted excuse but if mr belford's
letters and mine were upon subjects so general and some of them equally
 she presumed instructive and entertaining she could not but say that
she should be glad to see any of them and particularly those which miss
martin had seen and praised 

this was put close 

i looked at her to see if i could discover any tincture of jealousy in
this hint that miss martin had seen what i had not shown to her but
she did not look it so i only said i should be very proud to show her
not only those but all that passed between mr belford and me but i
must remind her that she knew the condition 

no indeed with a sweet lip pouted out as saucy as pretty implying a
lovely scorn that yet can only be lovely in youth so blooming and
beauty so divinely distinguished 

how i long to see such a motion again her mouth only can give it 

but i am mad with love yet eternal will be the distance at the rate i
go on now fire now ice my soul is continually upon the hiss as i may
say in vain however is the trial to quench what after all is
unquenchable 

pr'ythee belford forgive my nonsense and my vulcan-like metaphors did
i not tell thee not that i am sick of love but that i am mad with it 
why brought i such an angel into such a house into such company and
why do i not stop my ears to the sirens who knowing my aversion to
wedlock are perpetually touching that string 

i was not willing to be answered so easily i was sure that what passed
between two such young ladies friends so dear might be seen by every
body i had more reason than any body to wish to see the letters that
passed between her and miss howe because i was sure they must be full of
admirable instruction and one of the dear correspondents had deigned to
wish my entire reformation 

she looked at me as if she would look me through i thought i felt eye-
beam after eye-beam penetrate my shivering reins but she was silent 
nor needed her eyes the assistance of speech 

nevertheless a little recovering myself i hoped that nothing unhappy
had befallen either miss howe or her mother the letter of yesterday
sent by a particular hand she opening it with great emotion seeming to
have expected it sooner were the reasons for my apprehensions 

we were then at muswell-hill a pretty country within the eye to polly 
was the remark instead of replying to me 

but i was not so to be answered i should expect some charming subjects
and characters from two such pens i hoped every thing went on well
between mr hickman and miss howe her mother's heart i said was set
upon that match mr hickman was not without his merits he was what the
ladies called a sober man but i must needs say that i thought miss howe
deserved a husband of a very different cast 

this i supposed would have engaged her into a subject from which i
could have wiredrawn something for hickman is one of her favourites 
why i can't divine except for the sake of opposition of character to
that of thy honest friend 

but she cut me short by a look of disapprobation and another cool remark
upon a distant view and how far off miss horton do you think that
clump of trees may be pointing out of the coach so i had done 

here endeth all i have to write concerning our conversation on this our
agreeable airing 

we have both been writing ever since we came home i am to be favoured
with her company for an hour before she retires to rest 

all that obsequious love can suggest in order to engage her tenderest
sentiments for me against tomorrow's sickness will i aim at when we
meet but at parting will complain of a disorder in my stomach 


 


we have met all was love and unexceptionable respect on my part ease
and complaisance on her's she was concerned for my disorder so
sudden just as we parted but it was nothing i should be quite well
by the morning 

faith jack i think i am sick already is it possible for such a giddy
fellow as me to persuade myself to be ill i am a better mimic at this
rate than i wish to be but every nerve and fibre of me is always ready
to contribute its aid whether by health or by ailment to carry a
resolved-on roguery into execution 

dorcas has transcribed for me the whole letter of miss howe dated
sunday may 14 of which before i had only extracts she found no other
letter added to that parcel but this and that which i copied myself in
character last sunday whilst she was at church relating to the smuggling
scheme are enough for me 


 see vol iv letter xxix 
 ibid letter xlii 


 


dorcas tells me that her lady has been removing her papers from the
mahogany chest into a wainscot box which held her linen and which she
put into her dark closet we have no key of that at present no doubt
but all her letters previous to those i have come at are in that box 
dorcas is uneasy upon it yet hopes that her lady does not suspect her 
for she is sure that she laid in every thing as she found it 



letter ii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
cocoa-tree saturday may 27 

this ipecacuanha is a most disagreeable medicine that these cursed
physical folks can find out nothing to do us good but what would poison
the devil in the other world were they only to take physic it would
be punishable enough of itself for a mis-spent life a doctor at one
elbow and an apothecary at the other and the poor soul labouring under
their prescribed operations he need no worse tormentors 

but now this was to take down my countenance it has done it for with
violent reachings having taken enough to make me sick and not enough
water to carry it off i presently looked as if i had kept my bed a
fortnight ill jesting as i thought in the midst of the exercise with
edge tools and worse with physical ones 

two hours it held me i had forbid dorcas to let her lady know any thing
of the matter out of tenderness to her being willing when she knew my
prohibition to let her see that i expected her to be concerned for me 

well but dorcas was nevertheless a woman and she can whisper to her
lady the secret she is enjoined to keep 

come hither toad  sick as the devil at the instant  let me see what a
mixture of grief and surprize may be beat up together in thy puden-face 

that won't do that dropt jaw and mouth distended into the long oval 
is more upon the horrible than the grievous 

nor that pinking and winking with thy odious eyes as my charmer once
called them 

a little better that yet not quite right but keep your mouth closer 
you have a muscle or two which you have no command of between your
cheek-bone and your lips that should carry one corner of your mouth
up towards your crow's-foot and that down to meet it 

there begone be in a plaguy hurry running up stair and down to fetch
from the dining-room what you carry up on purpose to fetch till motion
extraordinary put you out of breath and give you the sigh natural 

what's the matter dorcas 

nothing madam 

my beloved wonders she has not seen me this morning no doubt but is too
shy to say she wonders repeated what's the matter however as dorcas
runs up and down stairs by her door bring on o madam my master my
poor master 

what how when and all the monosyllables of surprize 

 within parentheses let me tell thee that i have often thought that the
little words in the republic of letters like the little folks in a nation 
are the most significant the trisyllables and the rumblers of syllables
more than three are but the good-for-little magnates  

i must not tell you madam my master ordered me not to tell you but he
is in a worse way than he thinks for but he would not have you
frighted 

high concern took possession of every sweet feature she pitied me by
my soul she pitied me 

where is he 

too much in a hurry for good manners  another parenthesis jack good
manners are so little natural that we ought to be composed to observe
them politeness will not live in a storm  i cannot stay to answer
questions cries the wench though desirous to answer  a third
parenthesis like the people crying proclamations running away from the
customers they want to sell to  this hurry puts the lady in a hurry to
ask  a fourth by way of establishing the third   as the other does the
people in a hurry to buy and i have in my eye now a whole street
raised and running after a proclamation or express-crier as if the
first was a thief the other his pursuers 

at last o lord let mrs lovelace know there is danger to be sure 
whispered from one nymph to another but at the door and so loud that
my listening fair-one might hear 

out she darts as how as how dorcas 

o madam a vomiting of blood a vessel broke to be sure 

down she hastens finds every one as busy over my blood in the entry 
as if it were that of the neapolitan saint 

in steps my charmer with a face of sweet concern 

how do you mr lovelace 

o my best love very well very well nothing at all nothing of
consequence i shall be well in an instant straining again for i was
indeed plaguy sick though no more blood came 

in short belford i have gained my end i see the dear soul loves me 
i see she forgives me all that's past i see i have credit for a new
score 

miss howe i defy thee my dear mrs townsend who the devil are you 
troop away with your contrabands no smuggling nor smuggler but
myself nor will the choicest of my fair-one's favours be long
prohibited goods to me 


 


every one is now sure that she loves me tears were in her eyes more
than once for me she suffered me to take her hand and kiss it as often
as i pleased on mrs sinclair's mentioning that i too much confined
myself she pressed me to take an airing but obligingly desired me to be
careful of myself wished i would advise with a physician god made
physicians she said 

i did not think that jack god indeed made us all but i fancy she
meant physic instead of physicians and then the phrase might mean what
the vulgar phrase means god sends meat the devil cooks 

i was well already on taking the styptic from her dear hands 

on her requiring me to take the air i asked if i might have the honour
of her company in a coach and this that i might observe if she had an
intention of going out in my absence 

if she thought a chair were not a more proper vehicle for my case she
would with all her heart 

there's a precious 

i kissed her hand again she was all goodness would to heaven i better
deserved it i said but all were golden days before us her presence
and generous concern had done every thing i was well nothing ailed
me but since my beloved will have it so i'll take a little airing 
let a chair be called o my charmer were i to have owned this
indisposition to my late harasses and to the uneasiness i have had for
disobliging you all is infinitely compensated by your goodness all the
art of healing is in your smiles your late displeasure was the only
malady 

while mrs sinclair and dorcas and polly and even poor silly mabell
 for sally went out as my angel came in  with uplifted hands and eyes 
stood thanking heaven that i was better in audible whispers see the
power of love cried one what a charming husband another happy
couple all 

o how the dear creature's cheek mantled how her eyes sparkled how
sweetly acceptable is praise to conscious merit while it but reproaches
when applied to the undeserving what a new what a gay creation it
makes all at once in a diffident or dispirited heart 

and now belford was it not worth while to be sick and yet i must tell
thee that too many pleasanter expedients offer themselves to make trial
any more of this confounded ipecacuanha 



letter iii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
saturday may 27 


mr lovelace my dear has been very ill suddenly taken with a
vomiting of blood in great quantities some vessel broken he
complained of a disorder in his stomach over night i was the
affected with it as i am afraid it was occasioned by the violent
contentions between us but was i in fault 

how lately did i think i hated him but hatred and anger i see are but
temporary passions with me one cannot my dear hate people in danger
of death or who are in distress or affliction my heart i find is not
proof against kindness and acknowledgements of errors committed 

he took great care to have his illness concealed from me as long as he
could so tender in the violence of his disorder so desirous to make
the best of it i wish he had not been ill in my sight i was too much
affected every body alarming me with his danger the poor man from
such high health so suddenly taken and so unprepared 

he is gone out in a chair i advised him to do so i fear that my
advice was wrong since quiet in such a disorder must needs be best we
are apt to be so ready in cases of emergency to give our advice 
without judgment or waiting for it i proposed a physician indeed but
he would not hear of one i have great honour for the faculty and the
greater as i have always observed that those who treat the professors of
the art of healing contemptuously too generally treat higher
institutions in the same manner 

i am really very uneasy for i have i doubt exposed myself to him and
to the women below they indeed will excuse me as they think us
married but if he be not generous i shall have cause to regret this
surprise which as i had reason to think myself unaccountably treated by
him has taught me more than i knew of myself 

tis true i have owned more than once that i could have liked mr 
lovelace above all men i remember the debates you and i used to have on
this subject when i was your happy guest you used to say and once you
wrote that men of his cast are the men that our sex do not naturally
dislike while i held that such were not however that might be the men
we ought to like but what with my relations precipitating of me on one
hand and what with his unhappy character and embarrassing ways on the
other i had no more leisure than inclination to examine my own heart in
this particular and this reminds me of a transcribe though it was
written in raillery may it not be  say you that you have had such
persons to deal with as have not allowed you to attend to the throbs or
if you had them a little now-and-then whether having had two accounts
to place them to you have not by mistake put them to the wrong one  a
passage which although it came into my mind when mr lovelace was least
exceptionable yet that i have denied any efficacy to when he has teased
and vexed me and given me cause of suspicion for after all my dear 
mr lovelace is not wise in all his ways and should we not endeavour 
as much as is possible where we are not attached by natural ties to
like and dislike as reason bids us and according to the merit or demerit
of the object if love as it is called is allowed to be an excuse for
our most unreasonable follies and to lay level all the fences that a
careful education has surrounded us by what is meant by the doctrine of
subduing our passions but o my dearest friend am i not guilty of a
punishable fault were i to love this man of errors and has not my own
heart deceived me when i thought it did not and what must be that love 
that has not some degree of purity for its object i am afraid of
recollecting some passages in my cousin morden's letter and yet why
fly i from subjects that duly considered might tend to correct and
purify my heart i have carried i doubt my notions on this head too
high not for practice but for my practice yet think me not guilty of
prudery neither for had i found out as much of myself before or 
rather had he given me heart's ease enough before to find it out you
should have had my confession sooner 


 see vol iv letter xxxiv 
 see vol i letter xii 
 see vol iv letter xix and seq 


nevertheless let me tell you what i hope i may justly tell you that
if again he give me cause to resume distance and reserve i hope my
reason will gather strength enough from his imperfections to enable me to
keep my passions under what can we do more than govern ourselves by the
temporary lights lent us 

you will not wonder that i am grave on this detection detection must i
call it what can i call it 

dissatisfied with myself i am afraid to look back upon what i have
written yet know not how to have done writing i never was in such an
odd frame of mind i know not how to describe it was you ever so 
afraid of the censure of her you love yet not conscious that you deserve
it 

of this however i am convinced that i should indeed deserve censure 
if i kept any secret of my heart from you 

but i will not add another word after i have assured you that i will
look still more narrowly into myself and that i am

your equally sincere and affectionate
cl harlowe 



letter iv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sat evening 


i had a charming airing no return of my malady my heart was perfectly
easy how could my stomach be otherwise 

but when i came home i found that my sweet soul had been alarmed by a
new incident the inquiry after us both in a very suspicious manner and
that by description of our persons and not by names by a servant in a
blue livery turn'd up and trimm'd with yellow 

dorcas was called to him as the upper servant and she refusing to
answer any of the fellow's questions unless he told his business and
from whom he came the fellow as short as she said that if she would
not answer him perhaps she might answer somebody else and went away out
of humour 

dorcas hurried up to her lady and alarmed her not only with the fact 
but with her own conjectures adding that he was an ill-looking fellow 
and she was sure could come for no good 

the livery and the features of the servant were particularly inquired
after and as particularly described lord bless her no end of her
alarms she thought and then did her apprehensions anticipate every
evil that could happen 

she wished mr lovelace would come in 

mr lovelace came in soon after all lively grateful full of hopes of
duty of love to thank his charmer and to congratulate with her upon
the cure she had performed and then she told the story with all its
circumstances and dorcas to point her lady's fears told us that the
servant was a sun-burnt fellow and looked as if he had been at sea 

he was then no doubt captain singleton's servant and the next news she
should hear was that the house was surrounded by a whole ship's crew 
the vessel lying no farther off as she understood than rotherhithe 

impossible i said such an attempt would not be ushered in by such a
manner of inquiry and why may it not rather be a servant of your cousin
morden with notice of his arrival and of his design to attend you 

this surmise delighted her her apprehensions went off and she was at
leisure to congratulate me upon my sudden recovery which she did in the
most obliging manner 

but we had not sat long together when dorcas again came fluttering up to
tell us that the footman the very footman was again at the door and
inquired whether mr lovelace and his lady by name had not lodgings in
this house he asked he told dorcas for no harm but his disavowing
of harm was a demonstration with my apprehensive fair-one that harm was
intended and as the fellow had not been answered by dorcas i proposed
to go down to the street-parlour and hear what he had to say 

i see your causeless terror my dearest life said i and your impatience
 will you be pleased to walk down and without being observed for he
shall come no farther than the parlour-door you may hear all that
passes 

she consented we went down dorcas bid the man come forward well 
friend what is your business with mr and mrs lovelace 

bowing scraping i am sure you are the gentleman sir why sir my
business is only to know if your honour be here and to be spoken with 
or if you shall be here for any time 

whom came you from 

from a gentleman who ordered me to say if i was made to tell but not
else it was from a friend of mr john harlowe mrs lovelace's eldest
uncle 

the dear creature was ready to sink upon this it was but of late that
she had provided herself with salts she pulled them out 

do you know anything of colonel morden friend said i 

no i never heard of his name 

of captain singleton 

no sir but the gentleman my master is a captain too 

what is his name 

i don't know if i should tell 

there can be no harm in telling the gentleman's name if you come upon
a good account 

that i do for my master told me so and there is not an honester
gentleman on the face of god's yearth his name is captain tomlinson 
sir 

i don't know such a one 

i believe not sir he was pleased to say he don't know your honor 
sir but i heard him say as how he should not be an unwelcome visiter to
you for all that 

do you know such a man as captain tomlinson my dearest life  aside  
your uncle's friend 

no but my uncle may have acquaintance no doubt that i don't know 
but i hope  trembling  this is not a trick 

well friend if your master has anything to say to mr lovelace you may
tell him that mr lovelace is here and will see him whenever he
pleases 

the dear creature looked as if afraid that my engagement was too prompt
for my own safety and away went the fellow i wondering that she might
not wonder that this captain tomlinson whoever he were came not
himself or sent not a letter the second time when he had reason to
suppose that i might be here 

mean time for fear that this should be a contrivance of james harlowe 
who i said love plotting though he had not a head turned for it i
gave some precautionary directions to the servants and the women whom 
for the greater parade i assembled before us and my beloved was
resolved not to stir abroad till she saw the issue of this odd affair 

and here must i close though in so great a puzzle 

only let me add that poor belton wants thee for i dare not stir for my
life 

mowbray and tourville skulk about like vagabonds without heads without
hands without souls having neither you nor me to conduct them they
tell me they shall rust beyond the power of oil or action to brighten
them up or give them motion 

how goes it with thy uncle 



letter v

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday may 28 


this story of captain tomlinson employed us not only for the time we were
together last night but all the while we sat at breakfast this morning 
she would still have it that it was the prelude to some mischief from
singleton i insisted according to my former hint that it might much
more probably be a method taken by colonel morden to alarm her previous
to a personal visit travelled gentlemen affected to surprise in this
manner and why dearest creature said i must every thing that
happens which we cannot immediately account for be what we least wish 

she had had so many disagreeable things befall her of late that her
fears were too often stronger than her hopes 

and this madam makes me apprehensive that you will get into so low-
spirited a way that you will not be able to enjoy the happiness that
seems to await us 

her duty and her gratitude she gravely said to the dispenser of all
good would secure her she hoped against unthankfulness and a
thankful spirit was the same as a joyful one 

so belford for all her future joys she depends entirely upon the
invisible good she is certainly right since those who fix least upon
second causes are the least likely to be disappointed and is not this
gravity for her gravity 

she had hardly done speaking when dorcas came running up in a hurry 
she set even my heart into a palpitation thump thump thump like a
precipitated pendulum in a clock-case flutter flutter flutter my
charmer's as by her sweet bosom rising to her chin i saw 

this lower class of people my beloved herself observed were for ever
aiming at the stupid wonderful and for making even common incidents
matter of surprise 

why the devil said i to the wench this alarming hurry and with your
spread fingers and your o madams and o sirs and be cursed to you 
would there have been a second of time difference had you come up
slowly 

captain tomlinson sir 

captain devilson what care i do you see how you have disordered your
lady 

good mr lovelace said my charmer trembling  see jack when she has an
end to serve i am good mr lovelace   if if my brother if captain
singleton should appear pray now i beseech you let me beg of you to
govern your temper my brother is my brother captain singleton is but an
agent 

my dearest life folding my arms about her  when she asks favours 
thought i the devil's in it if she will not allow such an innocent
freedom as this from good mr lovelace too   you shall be witness of all
passes between us dorcas desire the gentleman to walk up 

let me retire to my chamber first let me not be known to be in the
house 

charming dear thou seest belford she is afraid of leaving me o the
little witchcrafts were it not for surprises now-and-then how would an
honest man know where to have them 

she withdrew to listen and though this incident has not turned out to
answer all i wished from it yet is it not necessary if i would acquaint
thee with my whole circulation to be very particular in what passed
between captain tomlinson and me 


enter captain tomlinson in a riding-dress whip in hand 

your servant sir mr lovelace i presume 

my name is lovelace sir 

excuse the day sir be pleased to excuse my garb i am obliged to go
out of town directly that i may return at night 

the day is a good day your garb needs no apology 

when i sent my servant i did not know that i should find time to do
myself this honour all that i thought i could do to oblige my friend
this journey was only to assure myself of your abode and whether there
was a probability of being admitted to the speech of either you or your
lady 

sir you best know your own motives what your time will permit you to do 
you also best know and here i am attending your pleasure 


my charmer owned afterwards her concern on my being so short whatever
i shall mingle of her emotions thou wilt easily guess i had afterwards 

sir i hope no offence i intend none 

none none at all sir 

sir i have no interest in the affair i come about i may appear
officious and if i thought i should i would decline any concern in it 
after i have just hinted what it is 

and pray sir what is it 

may i ask you sir without offence whether you wish to be reconciled 
and to co-operate upon honourable terms with one gentleman of the name
of harlowe preparative as it may be hoped to a general reconciliation 

o how my heart fluttered cried my charmer 

i can't tell sir  and then it fluttered still more no doubt   the
whole family have used me extremely ill they have taken greater
liberties with my character than are justifiable and with my family too 
which i can less forgive 

sir sir i have done i beg pardon for this intrusion 

my beloved was then ready to sink and thought very hardly of me 

but pray sir to the immediate purpose of your present commission 
since a commission it seems to be 

it is a commission sir and such a one as i thought would be agreeable
to all parties or i should not have given myself concern about it 

perhaps it may sir when known but let me ask you one previous
question do you know colonel morden sir 

no sir if you mean personally i do not but i have heard my good
friend mr john harlowe talk of him with great respect and such a
co-trustee with him in a certain trust 

lovel i thought it probable sir that the colonel might be arrived 
that you might be a gentleman of his acquaintance and that something of
an agreeable surprise might be intended 

capt had colonel morden been in england mr john harlowe would have
known it and then i should not have been a stranger to it 

lovel well but sir have you then any commission to me from mr john
harlowe 

capt sir i will tell you as briefly as i can the whole of what i
have to say but you'll excuse me also in a previous question for what
curiosity is not my motive but it is necessary to be answered before i
can proceed as you will judge when you hear it 

lovel what pray sir is your question 

capt briefly whether you are actually and bona fide married to miss
clarissa harlowe 

i started and in a haughty tone is this sir a question that must be
answered before you can proceed in the business you have undertaken 

i mean no offence mr lovelace mr harlowe sought to me to undertake
this office i have daughters and nieces of my own i thought it a good
office or i who have many considerable affairs upon my hands had not
accepted of it i know the world and will take the liberty to say that
if the young lady 

captain tomlinson i think you are called 

my name is tomlinson 

why then tomlinson no liberty as you call it will be taken well that
is not extremely delicate when that lady is mentioned 

when you had heard me out mr lovelace and had found i had so behaved 
as to make the caution necessary it would have been just to have given
it allow me to say i know what is due to the character of a woman of
virtue as well as any man alive 

why sir why captain tomlinson you seem warm if you intend any
thing by this  o how i trembled said the lady when she took notice of
this part of our conversation afterwards   i will only say that this is
a privileged place it is at present my home and an asylum for any
gentleman who thinks it worth his while to inquire after me be the
manner or end of his inquiry what it will 

i know not sir that i have given occasion for this i make no scruple
to attend you elsewhere if i am troublesome here i was told i had a
warm young gentleman to deal with but as i knew my intention and that
my commission was an amicable one i was the less concerned about that 
i am twice your age mr lovelace i dare say but i do assure you that
if either my message or my manner gives you offence i can suspend the
one or the other for a day or for ever as you like and so sir any
time before eight tomorrow morning you will let me know your further
commands and was going to tell me where he might be found 

captain tomlinson said i you answer well i love a man of spirit 
have you not been in the army 

i have sir but have turned my sword into a ploughshare as the
scripture has it  there was a clever fellow jack he was a good man
with somebody i warrant o what a fine coat and cloke for an hypocrite
will a text of scripture properly applied make at any time in the eyes
of the pious how easily are the good folks taken in   and all my
delight added he for some years past has been in cultivating my
paternal estate i love a brave man mr lovelace as well as ever i did
in my life but let me tell you sir that when you come to my time of
life you will be of opinion that there is not so much true bravery in
youthful choler as you may now think there is 

a clever fellow again belford ear and heart both at once he took in
my charmer tis well she says there are some men who have wisdom in
their anger 

well captain that is reproof for reproof so we are upon a footing 
and now give me the pleasure of hearing the import of your commission 

sir you must first allow me to repeat my question are you really and
bona fide married to miss clarissa harlowe or are you not yet married 

bluntly put captain but if i answer that i am what then 

why then sir i shall say that you are a man of honour 

that i hope i am whether you say it or not captain tomlinson 

sir i will be very frank in all i have to say on this subject mr john
harlowe has lately found out that you and his niece are both in the same
lodgings that you have been long so and that the lady was at the play
with you yesterday was se'nnight and he hopes that you are actually
married he has indeed heard that you are but as he knows your
enterprising temper and that you have declared that you disdain a
relation to their family he is willing by me to have your marriage
confirmed from your own mouth before he take the steps he is inclined to
take in his niece's favour you will allow me to say mr lovelace that
he will not be satisfied with an answer that admits of the least doubt 

let me tell you captain tomlinson that it is a high degree of vileness
for any man to suppose 

sir mr lovelace don't put yourself into a passion the lady's
relations are jealous of the honour of their family they have
prejudices to overcome as well as you advantage may have been taken and
the lady at the time not to blame 

this lady sir could give no such advantages and if she had what must
the man be captain tomlinson who could have taken them do you know
the lady sir 

i never had the honour to see her but once and that was at a church and
should not know her again 

not know her again sir i thought there was not a man living who had
once seen her and would not know her among a thousand 

i remember sir that i thought i never saw a finer woman in my life 
but mr lovelace i believe you will allow that it is better that her
relations should have wronged you than you the lady i hope sir you
will permit me to repeat my question 


enter dorcas in a hurry 

a gentleman this minute sir desires to speak with your honour  my
lady sir aside  

could the dear creature put dorcas upon telling this fib yet want to
save me one 

desire the gentleman to walk into one of the parlours i will wait upon
him presently 

 exit dorcas 


the dear creature i doubted not wanted to instruct me how to answer
the captain's home put i knew how i intended to answer it plumb thou
may'st be sure but dorcas's message staggered me and yet i was upon
one of my master-strokes which was to take advantage of the captain's
inquiries and to make her own her marriage before him as she had done
to the people below and if she had been brought to that to induce her 
for her uncle's satisfaction to write him a letter of gratitude which
of course must have been signed clarissa lovelace i was loth 
therefore thou may'st believe to attend her sudden commands and yet 
afraid of pushing matters beyond recovery with her i thought proper to
lead him from the question to account for himself and for mr harlowe's
coming to the knowledge of where we are and for other particulars which
i knew would engage her attention and which might possibly convince her
of the necessity there was for her to acquiesce in the affirmative i was
disposed to give and this for her own sake for what as i asked her
afterwards is it to me whether i am ever reconciled to her family a
family jack which i must for ever despise 

you think captain that i have answered doubtfully to the question you
put you may think so and you must know that i have a good deal of
pride and only that you are a gentleman and seem in this affair to be
governed by generous motives or i should ill brook being interrogated as
to my honour to a lady so dear to me but before i answer more directly
to the point pray satisfy me in a question or two that i shall put to
you 

with all my heart sir ask me what questions you please i will answer
them with sincerity and candour 

you say mr harlowe has found out that we were at a play together and
that we were both in the same lodgings how pray came he at his
knowledge for let me tell you that i have for certain
considerations not respecting myself i will assure you condescended
that our abode should be kept secret and this has been so strictly
observed that even miss howe though she and my beloved correspond knows
not directly where to send to us 

why sir the person who saw you at the play was a tenant of mr john
harlowe he watched all your motions when the play was done he
followed your coach to your lodgings and early the next day sunday 
he took horse and acquainted his landlord with what he had observed 

lovel how oddly things come about but does any other of the harlowes
know where we are 

capt it is an absolute secret to every other person of the family and
so it is intended to be kept as also that mr john harlowe is willing to
enter into treaty with you by me if his niece be actually married for
perhaps he is aware that he shall have difficulty enough with some
people to bring about the desirable reconciliation although he could
give them this assurance 

i doubt it not captain to james harlowe is all the family folly owing 
fine fools  heroically stalking about  to be governed by one to whom
malice and not genius gives the busy liveliness that distinguishes him
from a natural but how long pray sir has mr john harlowe been in
this pacific disposition 

i will tell you mr lovelace and the occasion and be very explicit
upon it and upon all that concerns you to know of me and of the
commission i have undertaken to execute and this the rather as when
you have heard me out you will be satisfied that i am not an officious
man in this my present address to you 

i am all attention captain tomlinson 

and so i doubt not was my beloved 

capt you must know sir that i have not been many months in mr john
harlowe's neighbourhood i removed from northamptonshire partly for the
sake of better managing one of two executorship which i could not avoid
engaging in the affairs of which frequently call me to town and are
part of my present business and partly for the sake of occupying a
neglected farm which has lately fallen into my hands but though an
acquaintance of no longer standing and that commencing on the bowling-
green  uncle john is a great bowler belford   upon my decision of a
point to every one's satisfaction which was appealed to me by all the
gentlemen and which might have been attended with bad consequences no
two brothers have a more cordial esteem for each other you know mr 
lovelace that there is a consent as i may call it in some minds which
will unite them stronger together in a few hours than years can do with
others whom yet we see not with disgust 

lovel very true captain 

capt it was on the foot of this avowed friendship on both sides that
on monday the 15th as i very well remember mr harlowe invited himself
home with me and when there he acquainted me with the whole of the
unhappy affair that had made them all so uneasy till then i knew it
only by report for intimate as we were i forbore to speak of what was
so near his heart till he began first and then he told me that he had
had an application made to him two or three days before by a gentleman
whom he named to induce him not only to be reconciled himself to his
niece but to forward for her a general reconciliation 


 see vol iv letters xxiii and xxix 


a like application he told me had been made to his sister harlowe by
a good woman whom every body respected who had intimated that his
niece if encouraged would again put herself into the protection of her
friends and leave you but if not that she must unavoidably be your's 

i hope mr lovelace i make no mischief you look concerned you sigh 
sir 

proceed captain tomlinson pray proceed and i sighed still more
profoundly 

capt they all thought it extremely particular that a lady should
decline marriage with a man she had so lately gone away with 

pray captain pray mr tomlinson no more of this subject my beloved
is an angel in every thing unblamable whatever faults there have
been have been theirs and mine what you would further say is that
the unforgiving family rejected her application they did she and i
had a misunderstanding the falling out of lovers you know captain 
 we have been happier ever since 

capt well sir but mr john harlowe could not but better consider
the matter afterwards and he desired my advice how to act in it he
told me that no father ever loved a daughter as he loved this niece of
his whom indeed he used to call his daughter-niece he said she had
really been unkindly treated by her brother and sister and as your
alliance sir was far from being a discredit to their family he would
do his endeavour to reconcile all parties if he could be sure that ye
were actually man and wife 

lovel and what pray captain was your advice 

capt i gave it as my opinion that if his niece were unworthily
treated and in distress as he apprehended from the application to
him he would soon hear of her again but that it was likely that this
application was made without expecting it would succeed and as a salvo
only to herself for marrying without their consent and the rather
thought i so as he had told me that it came from a young lady her
friend and not in a direct way from herself which young lady was no
favourite of the family and therefore would hardly have been employed 
had success been expected 

lovel very well captain tomlinson pray proceed 

capt here the matter rested till last sunday evening when mr john
harlowe came to me with the man who had seen you and your lady as i
presume she is at the play and who had assured him that you both
lodged in the same house and then the application having been so lately
made which implied that you were not then married he was so uneasy for
his niece's honour that i advised him to dispatch to town some one in
whom he could confide to make proper inquiries 

lovel very well captain and was such a person employed on such an
errand by her uncle 

capt a trusty and discreet person was accordingly sent and last
tuesday i think it was for he returned to us on the wednesday he
made the inquiries among the neighbours first   the very inquiry jack 
that gave us all so much uneasiness   but finding that none of them
could give any satisfactory account the lady's woman was come at who
declared that you were actually married but the inquirist keeping
himself on the reserve as to his employers the girl refused to tell the
day or to give him other particulars 


 see vol iv letter l 


lovel you give a very clear account of every thing captain tomlinson 
pray proceed 

capt the gentleman returned and on his report mr harlowe having
still doubts and being willing to proceed on some grounds in so
important a point besought me as my affairs called me frequently to
town to undertake this matter  you mr tomlinson he was pleased to
say have children of your own you know the world you know what i drive
at you will proceed i am sure with understanding and spirit and
whatever you are satisfied with shall satisfy me  


enter dorcas again in a hurry 

sir the gentleman is impatient 

i will attend him presently 

the captain then accounted for his not calling in person when he had
reason to think us here 

he said he had business of consequence a few miles out of town whither
he thought he must have gone yesterday and having been obliged to put
off his little journey till this day and understanding that we were
within not knowing whether he should have such another opportunity he
was willing to try his good fortune before he set out and this made him
come booted and spurred as i saw him 

he dropped a hint in commendation of the people of the house but it was
in such a way as to give no room to suspect that he thought it necessary
to inquire after the character of persons who make so genteel an
appearance as he observed they do 

and here let me remark that my beloved might collect another
circumstance in favour of the people below had she doubted their
characters from the silence of her uncle's inquirist on tuesday among
the neighbours 

capt and now sir that i believe i have satisfied you in every thing
relating to my commission i hope you will permit me to repeat my
question which is 


enter dorcas again out of breath 

sir the gentleman will step up to you  my lady is impatient she
wonders at your honour's delay aside  

excuse me captain for one moment 

i have staid my full time mr lovelace what may result from my
question and your answer whatever it shall be may take us up time 
and you are engaged will you permit me to attend you in the morning 
before i set out on my return 

you will then breakfast with me captain 

it must be early if i do i must reach my own house to-morrow night or
i shall make the best of wives unhappy and i have two or three places
to call at in my way 

it shall be by seven o'clock if you please captain we are early
folks and this i will tell you that if ever i am reconciled to a
family so implacable as i have always found the harlowes to be it must
be by the mediation of so cool and so moderate a gentleman as yourself 

and so with the highest civilities on both sides we parted but for
the private satisfaction of so good a man i left him out of doubt that
we were man and wife though i did not directly aver it 



letter vi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday night 


this captain tomlinson is one of the happiest as well as one of the best
men in the world what would i give to stand as high in my beloved's
opinion as he does but yet i am as good a man as he were i to tell my
own story and have equal credit given to it but the devil should have
had him before i had seen him on the account he came upon had i thought
i should not have answered my principal end in it i hinted to thee in
my last what that was 

but to the particulars of the conference between my fair-one and me on
her hasty messages which i was loth to come to because she has had an
half triumph over me in it 

after i had attended the captain down to the very passage i returned to
the dining-room and put on a joyful air on my beloved's entrance into
it o my dearest creature said i let me congratulate you on a prospect
so agreeable to your wishes and i snatched her hand and smothered it
with kisses 

i was going on when interrupting me you see mr lovelace said she 
how you have embarrassed yourself by your obliquities you see that you
have not been able to return a direct answer to a plain and honest
question though upon it depends all the happiness on the prospect of
which you congratulate me 

you know my best love what my prudent and i will say my kind motives
were for giving out that we were married you see that i have taken no
advantage of it and that no inconvenience has followed it you see that
your uncle wants only to be assured from ourselves that it is so 

not another word on this subject mr lovelace i will not only risk 
but i will forfeit the reconciliation so near my heart rather than i
will go on to countenance a story so untrue 

my dearest soul would you have me appear 

i would have you appear sir as you are i am resolved that i will
appear to my uncle's friend and to my uncle as i am 

for one week my dearest life cannot you for one week only till the
settlements 

not for one hour with my own consent you don't know sir how much i
have been afflicted that i have appeared to the people below what i am
not but my uncle sir shall never have it to upbraid me nor will i to
upbraid myself that i have wilfully passed upon him in false lights 

what my dear would you have me say to the captain to-morrow morning i
have given him room to think 

then put him right mr lovelace tell the truth tell him what you
please of the favour of your relations to me tell him what you will
about the settlements and if when drawn you will submit them to his
perusal and approbation it will show him how much you are in earnest 

my dearest life do you think that he would disapprove of the terms i
have offered 

no 

then may i be accursed if i willingly submit to be trampled under foot
by my enemies 

and may i mr lovelace never be happy in this life if i submit to
the passing upon my uncle harlowe a wilful and premeditated falshood for
truth i have too long laboured under the affliction which the rejection
of all my friends has given me to purchase my reconciliation with them
now at so dear a price as this of my veracity 

the women below my dear 

what are the women below to me i want not to establish myself with
them need they know all that passes between my relations and you and
me 

neither are they any thing to me madam only that when for the sake
of preventing the fatal mischiefs which might have attended your
brother's projects i have made them think us married i would not appear
to them in a light which you yourself think so shocking by my soul 
madam i had rather die than contradict myself so flagrantly after i
have related to them so many circumstances of our marriage 

well sir the women may believe what they please that i have given
countenance to what you told them is my error the many circumstances
which you own one untruth has drawn you in to relate is a justification
of my refusal in the present case 

don't you see madam that your uncle wishes to find that we are married 
may not the ceremony be privately over before his mediation can take
place 

urge this point no further mr lovelace if you will not tell the
truth i will to-morrow morning if i see captain tomlinson tell it
myself indeed i will 

will you madam consent that things pass as before with the people
below this mediation of tomlinson may come to nothing your brother's
schemes may be pursued the rather that now he will know perhaps from
your uncle that you are not under a legal protection you will at
least consent that things pass here as before 

to permit this is to go on in an error mr lovelace but as the
occasion for so doing if there can be in your opinion an occasion that
will warrant an untruth will as i presume soon be over i shall the
less dispute that point with you but a new error i will not be guilty
of if i can avoid it 

can i do you think madam have any dishonourable view in the step i
supposed you would not scruple to take towards a reconciliation with your
own family not for my own sake you know did i wish you to take it 
for what is it to me if i am never reconciled to your family i want no
favours from them 

i hope mr lovelace there is no occasion in our present not
disagreeable situation to answer such a question and let me say that
i shall think my prospects still more agreeable if to-morrow morning
you will not only own the very truth but give my uncle's friend such an
account of the steps you have taken and are taking as may keep up my
uncle's favourable intentions towards me this you may do under what
restrictions of secrecy you please captain tomlinson is a prudent man 
a promoter of family-peace you find and i dare say may be made a
friend 

i saw there was no help i saw that the inflexible harlowe spirit was
all up in her a little witch a little forgive me love for calling
her names and so i said with an air we have had too many
misunderstandings madam for me to wish for new ones i will obey you
without reserve had i not thought i should have obliged you by the
other method especially as the ceremony might have been over before any
thing could have operated from your uncle's intentions and of
consequence no untruth persisted in i would not have proposed it but
think not my beloved creature that you shall enjoy without condition 
this triumph over my judgment 

and then clasping my arms about her i gave her averted cheek her
charming lip designed a fervent kiss and your forgiveness of this
sweet freedom  bowing  is that condition 

she was not mortally offended and now must i make out the rest as well
as i can but this i will tell thee that although her triumph has not
diminished my love for her yet it has stimulated me more than ever to
revenge as thou wilt be apt to call it but victory or conquest is
the more proper word 

there is a pleasure tis true in subduing one of these watchful
beauties but by my soul belford men of our cast take twenty times the
pains to be rogues than it would cost them to be honest and dearly with
the sweat of our brows and to the puzzlement of our brains to say
nothing of the hazards we run do we earn our purchase and ought not
therefore to be grudged our success when we meet with it especially as 
when we have obtained our end satiety soon follows and leaves us little
or nothing to show for it but this indeed may be said of all worldly
delights and is not that a grave reflection from me 

i was willing to write up to the time although i have not carried my
principal point i shall make something turn out in my favour from
captain tomlinson's errand but let me give thee this caution that thou
do not pretend to judge of my devices by parts but have patience till
thou seest the whole but once more i swear that i will not be
out-norris'd by a pair of novices and yet i am very apprehensive at
times of the consequences of miss howe's smuggling scheme 

my conscience i should think ought not to reproach me for a
contrivance which is justified by the contrivances of two such girls as
these one of whom the more excellent of the two i have always with
her own approbation as i imagine proposed for my imitation 

but here jack is the thing that concludes me and cases my heart with
adamant i find by miss howe's letters that it is owing to her that i
have made no greater progress with my blooming fair-one she loves me 
the ipecacuanha contrivance convinces me that she loves me where there
is love there must be confidence or a desire of having reason to
confide generosity founded on my supposed generosity has taken hold
of her heart shall i not now see since i must forever be unhappy if i
marry her and leave any trial unessayed what i can make of her love 
and her newly-raised confidence will it not be to my glory to succeed 
and to her's and to the honour of her sex if i cannot where then will
be the hurt to either to make the trial and cannot i as i have often
said 
reward her when i will by marriage 

tis late or rather early for the day begins to dawn upon me i am
plaguy heavy perhaps i need not to have told thee that but will only
indulge a doze in my chair for an hour then shake myself wash and
refresh at my time of life with such a constitution as i am blessed
with that's all that's wanted 

good night to me it cannot be broad day till i am
awake aw-w-w-whaugh pox of this yawning 

is not thy uncle dead yet 

what's come to mine that he writes not to my last hunting after more
wisdom of nations i suppose yaw-yaw-yawning again pen begone 



letter vii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday may 29 


now have i established myself for ever in my charmer's heart 

the captain came at seven as promised and ready equipped for his
journey my beloved chose not to give us her company till our first
conversation was over ashamed i suppose to be present at that part of
it which was to restore her to her virgin state by my confession after
her wifehood had been reported to her uncle but she took her cue 
nevertheless and listened to all that passed 

the modestest women jack must think and think deeply sometimes i
wonder whether they ever blush at those things by themselves at which
they have so charming a knack of blushing in company if not and if
blushing be a sign of grace or modesty have not the sex as great a
command over their blushes as they are said to have over their tears 
this reflection would lead me a great way into female minds were i
disposed to pursue it 

i told the captain that i would prevent his question and accordingly
 after i had enjoined the strictest secrecy that no advantage might be
given to james harlowe and which he had answered for as well on mr 
harlowe's part as his own i acknowledged nakedly and fairly the whole
truth to wit that we were not yet married i gave him hints of the
causes of procrastination some of them owing to unhappy
misunderstandings but chiefly to the lady's desire of previous
reconciliation with her friends and to a delicacy that had no example 

less nice ladies than this jack love to have delays wilful and studied
delays imputed to them in these cases yet are indelicate in their
affected delicacy for do they not thereby tacitly confess that they
expect to be the greatest estgainers in wedlock and that there is
self-denial in the pride they take in delaying 

i told him the reason of our passing to the people below as married yet
as under a vow of restriction as to consummation which had kept us both
to the height one of forbearing the other of vigilant punctilio even
to the denial of those innocent freedoms which betrothed lovers never
scruple to allow and to take 

i then communicated to him a copy of my proposal of settlement the
substance of her written answer the contents of my letter of invitation
to lord m to be her nuptial-father and of my lord's generous reply 
but said that having apprehensions of delay from his infirmities and my
beloved choosing by all means and that from principles of unrequited
duty a private solemnization i had written to excuse his lordship's
presence and expected an answer every hour 

the settlements i told him were actually drawing by counsellor
williams of whose eminence he must have heard 

he had 

and of the truth of this he might satisfy himself before he went out of
town 

when these were drawn approved and engrossed nothing i said but
signing and the nomination of my happy day would be wanting i had a
pride i declared in doing the highest justice to so beloved a creature 
of my own voluntary motion and without the intervention of a family from
whom i had received the greatest insults and this being our present
situation i was contented that mr john harlowe should suspend his
reconciliatory purposes till our marriage were actually solemnized 

the captain was highly delighted with all i said yet owned that as his
dear friend mr harlowe had expressed himself greatly pleased to hear
that we were actually married he could have wished it had been so but 
nevertheless he doubted not that all would be well 

he saw my reasons he said and approved of them for making the
gentlewomen below  whom again he understood to be good sort of people 
believe that the ceremony had passed which so well accounted for what
the lady's maid had told mr harlowe's friend mr james harlowe he
said had certainly ends to answer in keeping open the breach and as
certainly had formed a design to get his sister out of my hands 
wherefore it as much imported his worthy friend to keep this treaty as
secret as it did me at least till he had formed his party and taken
his measures ill will and passion were dreadful misrepresenters it
was amazing to him that animosity could be carried so high against a man
capable of views so pacific and so honourable and who had shown such a
command of his temper in this whole transaction as i had done 
generosity indeed in every case where love of stratagem and intrigue
 i would excuse him were not concerned was a part of my character 

he was proceeding when breakfast being ready in came the empress of my
heart irradiating all around her as with a glory a benignity and
graciousness in her aspect that though natural to it had been long
banished from it 

next to prostration lowly bowed the captain o how the sweet creature
smiled her approbation of him reverence from one begets reverence from
another men are more of monkeys in imitation than they think
themselves involuntarily in a manner i bent my knee my dearest
life and made a very fine speech on presenting the captain to her no
title myself to her lip or cheek tis well he attempted not either he
was indeed ready to worship her could only touch her charming hand 

i have told the captain my dear creature and then i briefly repeated
 as if i had supposed she had not heard it all i had told him 

he was astonished that any body could be displeased one moment with such
an angel he undertook her cause as the highest degree of merit to
himself 

never i must need say did an angel so much look the angel all placid 
serene smiling self-assured a more lovely flush than usual heightening
her natural graces and adding charms even to radiance to her charming
complexion 

after we had seated ourselves the agreeable subject was renewed as we
took our chocolate how happy should she be in her uncle's restored
favour 

the captain engaged for it no more delays he hoped on her part let
the happy day be but once over all would then be right but was it
improper to ask for copies of my proposals and of her answer in order
to show them to his dear friend her uncle 

as mr lovelace pleased o that the dear creature would always say so 

it must be in strict confidence then i said but would it not be better
to show her uncle the draught of the settlements when drawn 

and will you be so good as to allow of this mr lovelace 

there belford we were once the quarrelsome but now we are the polite 
lovers 

indeed my dear creature i will if you desire it and if captain
tomlinson will engage that mr harlowe shall keep them absolutely a
secret that i may not be subjected to the cavil and controul of any
others of a family that have used me so very ill 

now indeed sir you are very obliging 

dost think jack that my face did not now also shine 

i held out my hand first consecrating it with a kiss for her's she
condescended to give it me i pressed it to my lips you know not
captain tomlinson with an air all storms overblown what a happy
man 

charming couple  his hands lifted up   how will my good friend rejoice 
o that he were present you know not madam how dear you still are to
your uncle harlowe 

i am still unhappy ever to have disobliged him 

not too much of that however fairest thought i 

the captain repeated his resolution of service and that in so acceptable
a manner that the dear creature wished that neither he nor any of his 
might ever want a friend of equal benevolence 

nor any of this she said for the captain brought it in that he had
five children living by one of the best wives and mothers whose
excellent management made him as happy as if his eight hundred pounds a
year which was all he had to boast of were two thousand 

without economy the oracular lady said no estate was large enough 
with it the least was not too small 

lie still teasing villain lie still i was only speaking to my
conscience jack 

and let me ask you mr lovelace said the captain yet not so much from
doubt as that i may proceed upon sure grounds you are willing to
co-operate with my dear friend in a general reconciliation 

let me tell you mr tomlinson that if it can be distinguished that my
readiness to make up with a family of whose generosity i have not had
reason to think highly is entirely owing to the value i have for this
angel of a woman i will not only co-operate with mr john harlowe as
you ask but i will meet with mr james harlowe senior and his lady all
the way and furthermore to make the son james and his sister arabella
quite easy i will absolutely disclaim any further interest whether
living or dying in any of the three brothers' estates contenting myself
with what my beloved's grandfather had bequeathed to her for i have
reason to be abundantly satisfied with my own circumstances and
prospects enough rewarded were she not to bring a shilling in dowry in
a woman who has a merit superior to all the goods of fortune true as
the gospel belford why had not this scene a real foundation 

the dear creature by her eyes expressed her gratitude before her lips
could utter it o mr lovelace said she you have infinitely and there
she stopt 

the captain run over in my praise he was really affected 

o that i had not such a mixture of revenge and pride in my love thought
i but my old plea cannot i make her amends at any time and is not
her virtue now in the height of its probation would she lay aside like
the friends of my uncontending rosebud all thoughts of defiance would
she throw herself upon my mercy and try me but one fortnight in the life
of honour what then i cannot say what then 

do not despise me jack for my inconsistency in no two letters perhaps
agreeing with myself who expects consistency in men of our
character but i am mad with love fired by revenge puzzled with my own
devices my invention is my curse my pride my punishment drawn five or
six ways at once can she possibly be so unhappy as i o why why was
this woman so divinely excellent yet how know i that she is what have
been her trials have i had the courage to make a single one upon her
person though a thousand upon her temper enow i hope to make her
afraid of ever more disobliging me more 


 


i must banish reflection or i am a lost man for these two hours past
have i hated myself for my own contrivances and this not only from what
i have related to thee but for what i have further to relate but i
have now once more steeled my heart my vengeance is uppermost for i
have been reperusing some of miss howe's virulence the contempt they
have both held me in i cannot bear 

the happiest breakfast-time my beloved owned that she had ever known
since she had left her father's house  she might have let this alone  
the captain renewed all his protestations of service he would write me
word how his dear friend received the account he should give him of the
happy situation of our affairs and what he thought of the settlements 
as soon as i should send him the draughts so kindly promised and we
parted with great professions of mutual esteem my beloved putting up
vows for the success of his generous mediation 

when i returned from attending the captain down stairs which i did to
the outward door my beloved met me as i entered the dining-room 
complacency reigning in every lovely feature 

you see me already  said she another creature you know not mr 
lovelace how near my heart this hoped-for reconciliation is i am now
willing to banish every disagreeable remembrance you know not sir how
much you have obliged me and o mr lovelace how happy i shall be when
my heart is lightened from the all-sinking weight of a father's curse 
when my dear mamma you don't know sir half the excellencies of my dear
mamma and what a kind heart she has when it is left to follow its own
impulses when this blessed mamma shall once more fold me to her
indulgent bosom when i shall again have uncles and aunts and a brother
and sister all striving who shall show most kindness and favour to the
poor outcast then no more an outcast and you mr lovelace to behold
all this with welcome what though a little cold at first when they
come to know you better and to see you oftener no fresh causes of
disgust occurring and you as i hope having entered upon a new course 
all will be warmer and warmer love on both sides till every one will
perhaps wonder how they came to set themselves against you 

then drying her tears with her handkerchief after a few moments pausing 
on a sudden as if recollecting that she had been led by her joy to an
expression of it which she had not intended i should see she retired to
her chamber with precipitation leaving me almost as unable to stand it
as herself 

in short i was i want words to say how i was my nose had been made to
tingle before my eyes have before been made to glisten by this
soul-moving beauty but so very much affected i never was for trying
to check my sensibility it was too strong for me and i even sobbed 
yes by my soul i audibly sobbed and was forced to turn from her before
she had well finished her affecting speech 

i want methinks now i have owned the odd sensation to describe it to
thee the thing was so strange to me something choking as it were in
my throat i know not how yet i must needs say though i am out of
countenance upon the recollection that there was something very pretty
in it and i wish i could know it again that i might have a more perfect
idea of it and be better able to describe it to thee 

but this effect of her joy on such an occasion gives me a high notion of
what that virtue must be  what other name can i call it   which in a mind
so capable of delicate transport should be able to make so charming a
creature in her very bloom all frost and snow to every advance of love
from the man she hates not this must be all from education too must it
not belford can education have stronger force in a woman's heart than
nature sure it cannot but if it can how entirely right are parents
to cultivate their daughters' minds and to inspire them with notions of
reserve and distance to our sex and indeed to make them think highly of
their own for pride is an excellent substitute let me tell thee where
virtue shines not out as the sun in its own unborrowed lustre 



letter viii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


and now it is time to confess and yet i know that thy conjectures are
aforehand with my exposition that this captain tomlinson who is so
great a favourite with my charmer and who takes so much delight in
healing breaches and reconciling differences is neither a greater man
nor a less than honest patrick m'donald attended by a discarded footman
of his own finding out 

thou knowest what a various-lifed rascal he is and to what better hopes
born and educated but that ingenious knack of forgery for which he was
expelled the dublin-university and a detection since in evidenceship 
have been his ruin for these have thrown him from one country to
another and at last into the way of life which would make him a fit
husband for miss howe's townsend with her contrabands he is thou
knowest admirably qualified for any enterprize that requires adroitness
and solemnity and can there after all be a higher piece of justice 
than to keep one smuggler in readiness to play against another 

well but lovelace methinks thou questionest how camest thou to
venture upon such a contrivance as this when as thou hast told me the
lady used to be a month at a time at this uncle's and must therefore in
all probability know that there was not a captain tomlinson in all the
neighbourhood at least no one of the name so intimate with him as this
man pretends to be 

this objection jack is so natural a one that i could not help
observing to my charmer that she must surely have heard her uncle speak
of this gentleman no she said she never had besides she had not
been at her uncle harlowe's for near ten months  this i had heard from
her before  and there were several gentlemen who used the same green 
whom she knew not 

we are all very ready thou knowest to believe what she likes 

and what was the reason thinkest thou that she had not been of so long
a time at this uncle's why this old sinner who imagines himself
entitled to call me to account for my freedoms with the sex has lately
fallen into familiarities as it is suspected with his housekeeper who
assumes airs upon it a cursed deluding sex in youth middle age or
dotage they take us all in 

dost thou not see however that this housekeeper knows nothing nor is
to know any thing of the treaty of reconciliation designed to be set on
foot and therefore the uncle always comes to the captain the captain
goes not to the uncle and this i surmised to the lady and then it was
a natural suggestion that the captain was the rather applied to as he
is a stranger to the rest of the family need i tell thee the meaning of
all this 

but this intrigue of the antient is a piece of private history the truth
of which my beloved cares not to own and indeed affects to disbelieve 
as she does also some puisny gallantries of her foolish brother which 
by way of recrimination i have hinted at without naming my informant in
their family 

well but methinks thou questionest again is it not probable that miss
howe will make inquiry after such a man as tomlinson and when she
cannot 

i know what thou wouldst say but i have no doubt that wilson will be so
good if i desire it as to give into my own hands any letter that may be
brought by collins to his house for a week to come and now i hope thou
art satisfied 

i will conclude with a short story 

two neighbouring sovereigns were at war together about some pitiful
chuck-farthing thing or other no matter what for the least trifles will
set princes and children at loggerheads their armies had been drawn up
in battalia some days and the news of a decisive action was expected
every hour to arrive at each court at last issue was joined a bloody
battle was fought and a fellow who had been a spectator of it arriving 
with the news of a complete victory at the capital of one of the princes
some time before the appointed couriers the bells were set a ringing 
bonfires and illuminations were made and the people went to bed
intoxicated with joy and good liquor but the next day all was reversed 
the victorious enemy pursuing his advantage was expected every hour at
the gates of the almost defenceless capital the first reporter was
hereupon sought for and found and being questioned pleaded a great
deal of merit in that he had in so dismal a situation taken such a
space of time from the distress of his fellow-citizens and given it to
festivity as were the hours between the false good news and the real
bad 

do thou belford make the application this i know that i have given
greater joy to my beloved than she had thought would so soon fall to her
share and as the human life is properly said to be chequerwork no
doubt but a person of her prudence will make the best of it and set off
so much good against so much bad in order to strike as just a balance as
possible 


 the lady in three several letters acquaints her friend with the most
material passages and conversations contained in those of mr lovelace's
preceding these are her words on relating what the commission of the
pretended tomlinson was after the apprehensions that his distant inquiry
had given her  

at last my dear all these doubts and fears were cleared up and
banished and in their place a delightful prospect was opened to me 
for it comes happily out but at present it must be an absolute secret 
for reasons which i shall mention in the sequel that the gentleman was
sent by my uncle harlowe  i thought he could not be angry with me for
ever  all owing to the conversation that passed between your good mr 
hickman and him for although mr hickman's application was too harshly
rejected at the time my uncle could not but think better of it
afterwards and of the arguments that worthy gentleman used in my favour 

who upon a passionate repulse would despair of having a reasonable
request granted who would not by gentleness and condescension 
endeavour to leave favourable impressions upon an angry mind which when
it comes cooly to reflect may induce it to work itself into a
condescending temper to request a favour as i have often said is one
thing to challenge it as our due is another and what right has a
petitioner to be angry at a repulse if he has not a right to demand what
he sues for as a debt 


 she describes captain tomlinson on his breakfast-visit to be a grave 
good sort of man and in another place a genteel man of great gravity 
and a good aspect she believes upwards of fifty years of age i liked
him says she as soon as i saw him 

as her projects are now she says more favourable than heretofore she
wishes that her hopes of mr lovelace's so-often-promised reformation
were better grounded than she is afraid they can be  

we have both been extremely puzzled my dear says she to reconcile some
parts of mr lovelace's character with other parts of it his good with
his bad such of the former in particular as his generosity to his
tenants his bounty to the innkeeper's daughter his readiness to put me
upon doing kind things by my good norton and others 

a strange mixture in his mind as i have told him for he is certainly
 as i have reason to say looking back upon his past behaviour to me in
twenty instances a hard-hearted man indeed my dear i have thought
more than once that he had rather see me in tears than give me reason to
be pleased with him 

my cousin morden says that free livers are remorseless and so they
must be in the very nature of things 


 see vol iv letter xix see also mr lovelace's own confession of the
delight he takes in a woman's tears in different parts of his letters 


mr lovelace is a proud man we have both long ago observed that he is 
and i am truly afraid that his very generosity is more owing to his
pride and his vanity that that philanthropy shall i call it which
distinguishes a beneficent mind 

money he values not but as a mean to support his pride and his
independence and it is easy as i have often thought for a person to
part with a secondary appetite when by so doing he can promote or
gratify a first 

i am afraid my dear that there must have been some fault in his
education his natural bias was not perhaps as his power was likely to
be large to do good and beneficent actions but not i doubt from
proper motives 

if he had his generosity would not have stopt at pride but would have
struck into humanity and then would he not have contented himself with
doing praiseworthy things by fits and starts or as if relying on the
doctrine of merits he hoped by a good action to atone for a bad one 
but he would have been uniformly noble and done the good for its own
sake 


 that the lady judges rightly of him in this place see vol i letter
xxxiv where giving the motive for his generosity to his rosebud he
says as i make it my rule whenever i have committed a very capital
enormity to do some good by way of atonement and as i believe i am a
pretty deal indebted on that score i intend to join an hundred pounds to
johnny's aunt's hundred pounds to make one innocent couple happy  
besides which motive he had a further view in answer in that instance of
his generosity as may be seen in vol ii letters xxvi xxvii xxviii 
see also the note vol ii pp 170 171 

to show the consistence of his actions as they now appear with his
views and principles as he lays them down in his first letters it may
be not amiss to refer the reader to his letters vol i no xxxiv xxxv 

see also vol i letter xxx and letter xl for clarissa's early opinion
of mr lovelace whence the coldness and indifference to him which he
so repeatedly accuses her of will be accounted for more to her glory 
than to his honour 


o my dear what a lot have i drawn pride this poor man's virtue and
revenge his other predominating quality this one consolation however 
remains he is not an infidel and unbeliever had he been an infidel 
there would have been no room at all for hope of him but priding
himself as he does in his fertile invention he would have been utterly
abandoned irreclaimable and a savage 


 when she comes to relate those occasions which mr lovelace in his
narrative acknowledges himself to be affected by she thus expresses
herself  

he endeavoured as once before to conceal his emotion but why my
dear should these men for mr lovelace is not singular in this think
themselves above giving these beautiful proofs of a feeling heart were
it in my power again to choose or to refuse i would reject the man with
contempt who sought to suppress or offered to deny the power of being
visibly affected upon proper occasions as either a savage-hearted
creature or as one who was so ignorant of the principal glory of the
human nature as to place his pride in a barbarous insensibility 

these lines translated from juvenal by mr tate i have been often
pleased with 

 compassion proper to mankind appears 
 which nature witness'd when she lent us tears 
 of tender sentiments we only give
 these proofs to weep is our prerogative 
 to show by pitying looks and melting eyes 
 how with a suff'ring friend we sympathise 
 who can all sense of other ills escape 
 is but a brute at best in human shape 

it cannot but yield me some pleasure hardly as i have sometimes thought
of the people of the house that such a good man as captain tomlinson had
spoken well of them upon inquiry 

and here i stop a minute my dear to receive in fancy your kind
congratulation 

my next i hope will confirm my present and open still more agreeable
prospects mean time be assured that there cannot possibly any good
fortune befal me which i shall look upon with equal delight to that i
have in your friendship 

my thankful compliments to your good mr hickman to whose kind invention
i am so much obliged on this occasion conclude me my dearest miss howe 

your ever affectionate and grateful
cl harlowe 



letter ix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday may 30 


i have a letter from lord m such a one as i would wish for if i
intended matrimony but as matters are circumstanced i cannot think of
showing it to my beloved 

my lord regrets that he is not to be the lady's nuptial father he
seems apprehensive that i have still specious as my reasons are some
mischief in my head 

he graciously consents that i may marry when i please and offers one
or both of my cousins to assist my bride and to support her spirits on
the occasion since as he understands she is so much afraid to venture
with me 

pritchard he tells me has his final orders to draw up deeds for
assigning over to me in perpetuity 1000 per annum which he will
execute the same hour that the lady in person owns her marriage 

he consents that the jointure be made from my own estate 

he wishes that the lady would have accepted of his draught and
commends me for tendering it to her but reproaches me for my pride in
not keeping it myself what the right side gives up the left he says 
may be the better for 

the girls the left-sided girls he means 

with all my heart if i can have my clarissa the devil take every thing
else 

a good deal of other stuff writes the stupid peer scribbling in several
places half a dozen lines apparently for no other reason but to bring in
as many musty words in an old saw 

if thou sawest how i can manage since my beloved will wonder that i
have not an answer from my lord to such a letter as i wrote to him and
if i own i have one will expect that i should shew it to her as i did
my letter this i answer that i can be informed by pritchard that my
lord has the gout in his right-hand and has ordered him to attend me in
form for my particular orders about the transfer  and i can see
pritchard thou knowest at the king's arms or wherever i please at an
hour's warning though he be at m hall i in town and he by word of
mouth can acquaint me with every thing in my lord's letter that is
necessary for my charmer to know 

whenever it suits me i can resolve the old peer to his right hand and
then can make him write a much more sensible letter than this that he has
now sent me 

thou knowest that an adroitness in the art of manual imitation was one
of my earliest attainments it has been said on this occasion that had
i been a bad man in meum and tuum matters i should not have been fit to
live as to the girls we hold it no sin to cheat them and are we not
told that in being well deceived consists the whole of human happiness 


wednesday may 31 

all still happier and happier a very high honour done me a chariot 
instead of a coach permitted purposely to indulge me in the subject of
subjects 

our discourse in this sweet airing turned upon our future manner of life 
the day is bashfully promised me soon was the answer to my repeated
urgency our equipage our servants our liveries were parts of the
delightful subject a desire that the wretch who had given me
intelligence out of the family honest joseph leman might not be one of
our menials and her resolution to have her faithful hannah whether
recovered or not were signified and both as readily assented to 

her wishes from my attentive behaviour when with her at st paul's 
that i would often accompany her to the divine service were greatly
intimated and as readily engaged for i assured her that i ever had
respected the clergy in a body and some individuals of them her dr 
lewen for one highly and that were not going to church an act of
religion i thought it  as i told thee once  a most agreeable sight to
see rich and poor all of a company as i might say assembled once a
week in one place and each in his or her best attire to worship the god
that made them nor could it be a hardship upon a man liberally
educated to make one on so solemn an occasion and to hear the harangue
of a man of letters though far from being the principal part of the
service as it is too generally looked upon to be whose studies having
taken a different turn from his own he must always have something new to
say 


 see vol iv letter v 
 ibid 


she shook her head and repeated the word new but looked as if willing
to be satisfied for the present with this answer to be sure jack she
means to do great despight to his satanic majesty in her hopes of
reforming me no wonder therefore if he exerts himself to prevent her 
and to be revenged but how came this in i am ever of party against
myself one day i fancy i shall hate myself on recollecting what i am
about at this instant but i must stay till then we must all of us do
something to repent of 

the reconciliation-prospect was enlarged upon if her uncle harlowe will
but pave the way to it and if it can be brought about she shall be
happy happy with a sigh as it is now possible she can be 

she won't forbear jack 

i told her that i had heard from pritchard just before we set out on
our airing and expected him in town to-morrow from lord m to take my
directions i spoke with gratitude of my lord's kindness to me and with
pleasure of lady sarah's lady betty's and my two cousins montague's
veneration for her as also of his lordship's concern that his gout
hindered him from writing a reply with his own hand to my last 

she pitied my lord she pitied poor mrs fretchville too for she had
the goodness to inquire after her the dear creature pitied every body
that seemed to want pity happy in her own prospects she had leisure to
look abroad and wishes every body equally happy 

it is likely to go very hard with mrs fretchville her face which she
had valued herself upon will be utterly ruined this good however as
i could not but observe she may reap from so great an evil as the
greater malady generally swallows up the less she may have a grief on
this occasion that may diminish the other grief and make it tolerable 

i had a gentle reprimand for this light turn on so heavy an evil for
what was the loss of beauty to the loss of a good husband  excellent
creature 

her hopes and her pleasure upon those hopes that miss howe's mother
would be reconciled to her were also mentioned good mrs howe was her
word for a woman so covetous and so remorseless in her covetousness 
that no one else will call her good but this dear creature has such an
extension in her love as to be capable of valuing the most insignificant
animal related to those whom she respects love me and love my dog i
have heard lord m say who knows but that i may in time in compliment
to myself bring her to think well of thee jack 

but what am i about am i not all this time arraigning my own heart i
know i am by the remorse i feel in it while my pen bears testimony to
her excellence but yet i must add for no selfish consideration shall
hinder me from doing justice to this admirable creature that in this
conversation she demonstrated so much prudent knowledge in every thing
that relates to that part of the domestic management which falls under
the care of a mistress of a family that i believe she has no equal of
her years in the world 

but indeed i know not the subject on which she does not talk with
admirable distinction insomuch that could i but get over my prejudices
against matrimony and resolve to walk in the dull beaten path of my
ancestors i should be the happiest of men and if i cannot i may be ten
times more to be pitied than she 

my heart my heart belford is not to be trusted i break off to
re-peruse some of miss howe's virulence 


 


cursed letters these of miss howe jack do thou turn back to those of
mine where i take notice of them i proceed 

upon the whole my charmer was all gentleness all ease all serenity 
throughout this sweet excursion nor had she reason to be otherwise for
it being the first time that i had the honour of her company alone i was
resolved to encourage her by my respectfulness to repeat the favour 

on our return i found the counsellor's clerk waiting for me with a
draught of the marriage-settlements 

they are drawn with only the necessary variations from those made for
my mother the original of which now returned by the counsellor as
well as the new draughts i have put into my beloved's hands 

these settlements of my mother made the lawyer's work easy nor can she
have a better precedent the great lord s having settled them at the
request of my mother's relations all the difference my charmer's are
100l per annum more than my mother's 

i offered to read to her the old deed while she looked over the draught 
for she had refused her presence at the examination with the clerk but
this she also declined 

i suppose she did not care to hear of so many children first second 
third fourth fifth sixth and seventh sons and as many daughters to
be begotten upon the body of the said clarissa harlowe 

charming matrimonial recitativoes though it is always said lawfully
begotten too as if a man could beget children unlawfully upon the body
of his own wife but thinkest thou not that these arch rogues the
lawyers hereby intimate that a man may have children by his wife before
marriage this must be what they mean why will these sly fellows put
an honest man in minds of such rogueries but hence as in numberless
other instances we see that law and gospel are two very different
things 

dorcas in our absence tried to get at the wainscot-box in the dark
closet but it cannot be done without violence and to run a risk of
consequence now for mere curiosity-sake would be inexcusable 

mrs sinclair and the nymphs are all of opinion that i am now so much a
favourite and have such a visible share in her confidence and even in
her affections that i may do what i will and plead for excuse violence
of passion which they will have it makes violence of action pardonable
with their sex as well as allowed extenuation with the unconcerned of
both sexes and they all offer their helping hands why not they say 
has she not passed for my wife before them all and is she not in a fine
way of being reconciled to her friends and was not the want of that
reconciliation the pretence for postponing the consummation 

they again urge me since it is so difficult to make night my friend to
an attempt in the day they remind me that the situation of their house
is such that no noises can be heard out of it and ridicule me for
making it necessary for a lady to be undressed it was not always so
with me poor old man sally told me saucily flinging her handkerchief
in my face 



letter x

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
friday june 2 


notwithstanding my studied-for politeness and complaisance for some days
past and though i have wanted courage to throw the mask quite aside yet
i have made the dear creature more than once look about her by the warm 
though decent expression of my passion i have brought her to own that
i am more than indifferent with her but as to love which i pressed her
to acknowledge what need of acknowledgments of that sort when a woman
consents to marrying and once repulsing me with displeasure the proof
of true love i was vowing for her was respect not freedom and
offering to defend myself she told me that all the conception she had
been able to form of a faulty passion was that it must demonstrate
itself as mine sought to do 

i endeavoured to justify my passion by laying over-delicacy at her door 
over-delicacy she said was not my fault if it were her's she must
plainly tell me that i appeared to her incapable of distinguishing what
were the requisites of a pure mind perhaps had the libertine
presumption to imagine that there was no difference in heart nor any
but what proceeded from difference of education and custom between the
pure and impure and yet custom alone as she observed if i did so
think would make a second nature as well in good as in bad habits 


 


i have just now been called to account for some innocent liberties which
i thought myself entitled to take before the women as they suppose us to
be married and now within view of consummation 

i took the lecture very hardly and with impatience wished for the happy
day and hour when i might call her all my own and meet with no check
from a niceness that had no example 

she looked at me with a bashful kind of contempt i thought it contempt 
and required the reason for it not being conscious of offence as i told
her 

this is not the first time mr lovelace said she that i have had cause
to be displeased with you when you perhaps have not thought yourself
exceptionable but sir let me tell you that the married state in my
eye is a state of purity and  i think she told me  not of
licentiousness so at least i understood her 

marriage-purity jack very comical faith yet sweet dears half the
female world ready to run away with a rake because he is a rake and for
no other reason nay every other reason against their choice of such a
one 

but have not you and i belford seen young wives who would be thought
modest and when maids were fantastically shy permit freedoms in
public from their uxorious husbands which have shown that both of them
have forgotten what belongs either to prudence or decency while every
modest eye has sunk under the shameless effrontery and every modest face
been covered with blushes for those who could not blush 

i once upon such an occasion proposed to a circle of a dozen thus
scandalized to withdraw since they must needs see that as well the
lady as the gentleman wanted to be in private this motion had its
effect upon the amorous pair and i was applauded for the check given to
their licentiousness 

but upon another occasion of this sort i acted a little more in
character for i ventured to make an attempt upon a bride which i
should not have had the courage to make had not the unblushing
passiveness with which she received her fond husband's public toyings
 looking round her with triumph rather than with shame upon every lady
present incited my curiosity to know if the same complacency might not
be shown to a private friend tis true i was in honour obliged to keep
the secret but i never saw the turtles bill afterwards but i thought
of number two to the same female and in my heart thanked the fond
husband for the lesson he had taught his wife 

from what i have said thou wilt see that i approve of my beloved's
exception to public loves that i hope is all the charming icicle
means by marriage-purity but to return 

from the whole of what i have mentioned to have passed between my beloved
and me thou wilt gather that i have not been a mere dangler a hickman 
in the passed days though not absolutely active and a lovelace 

the dear creature now considers herself as my wife-elect the unsaddened
heart no longer prudish will not now i hope give the sable turn to
every address of the man she dislikes not and yet she must keep up so
much reserve as will justify past inflexibilities many and many a
pretty soul would yield were she not afraid that the man she favoured
would think the worse of her for it  that is also a part of the rake's
creed but should she resent ever so strongly she cannot now break with
me since if she does there will be an end of the family
reconciliation and that in a way highly discreditable to herself 


saturday june 3 

just returned from doctors commons i have been endeavouring to get a
license very true jack i have the mortification to find a
difficulty as the lady is of rank and fortune and as there is no
consent of father or next friend in obtaining this all-fettering
instrument 

i made report of this difficulty it is very right  she says that
such difficulties should be made  but not to a man of my known fortune 
surely jack though the woman were the daughter of a duke 

i asked if she approved of the settlements she said she had compared
them with my mother's and had no objection to them she had written to
miss howe upon the subject she owned and to inform her of our present
situation 


 as this letter of the lady to miss howe contains no new matter but
what may be collected from one of those of mr lovelace it is omitted 


 


just now in high good humour my beloved returned me the draughts of the
settlements a copy of which i have sent to captain tomlinson she
complimented me that she never had any doubt of my honour in cases of
this nature 

in matters between man and man nobody ever had thou knowest 

i had need thou wilt say to have some good qualities 

great faults and great virtues are often found in the same person in
nothing very bad but as to women and did not one of them begin with
me 


 see vol i letter xxxi 


we have held that women have no souls i am a very turk in this point 
and willing to believe they have not and if so to whom shall i be
accountable for what i do to them nay if souls they have as there is
no sex in ethereals nor need of any what plea can a lady hold of
injuries done her in her lady-state when there is an end of her
lady-ship 



letter xi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday june 5 


i am now almost in despair of succeeding with this charming frost-piece
by love or gentleness a copy of the draughts as i told thee has been
sent to captain tomlinson and that by a special messenger engrossments
are proceeding with i have been again at the commons should in all
probability have procured a license by mallory's means had not mallory's
friend the proctor been suddenly sent for to chestnut to make an old
lady's will pritchard has told me by word of mouth though my charmer
saw him not all that was necessary for her to know in the letter my lord
wrote which i could not show her and taken my directions about the
estates to be made over to me on my nuptials yet with all these
favourable appearances no conceding moment to be found no improvable
tenderness to be raised 

but never i believe was there so true so delicate a modesty in the
human mind as in that of this lady and this has been my security all
along and in spite of miss howe's advice to her will be so still 
since if her delicacy be a fault she can no more overcome it than i can
my aversion to matrimony habit habit jack seest thou not may
subject us both to weaknesses and should she not have charity for me 
as i have for her 

twice indeed with rapture which once she called rude did i salute her 
and each time resenting the freedom did she retire though to do her
justice she favoured me again with her presence at my first entreaty 
and took no notice of the cause of her withdrawing 

is it policy to show so open a resentment for innocent liberties which 
in her situation she must so soon forgive 

yet the woman who resents not initiatory freedoms must be lost for love
is an encroacher love never goes backward love is always aspiring 
always must aspire nothing but the highest act of love can satisfy an
indulged love and what advantages has a lover who values not breaking
the peace over his mistress who is solicitous to keep it 

i have now at this instant wrought myself up for the dozenth time to a
half-resolution a thousand agreeable things i have to say to her she
is in the dining-room just gone up she always expects me when there 


 


high displeasure followed by an abrupt departure 

i sat down by her i took both her hands in mine i would have it so 
all gentle my voice her father mentioned with respect her mother with
reverence even her brother amicably spoken of i never thought i could
have wished so ardently as i told her i did wish for a reconciliation
with her family 

a sweet and grateful flush then overspread her fair face a gentle sigh
now-and-then heaved her handkerchief 

i perfectly longed to hear from captain tomlinson it was impossible for
the uncle to find fault with the draught of the settlements i would
not however be understood by sending them down that i intended to put
it in her uncle's power to delay my happy day when when was it to be 

i would hasten again to the commons and would not return without the
license 

the lawn i proposed to retire to as soon as the happy ceremony was over 
this day and that day i proposed 

it was time enough to name the day when the settlements were completed 
and the license obtained happy should she be could the kind captain
tomlinson obtain her uncle's presence privately 

a good hint it may perhaps be improved upon either for a delay or a
pacifier 

no new delays for heaven's sake i besought her and reproached her
gently for the past name but the day an early day i hoped it would
be in the following week that i might hail its approach and number
the tardy hours 

my cheek reclined on her shoulder kissing her hands by turns rather
bashfully than angrily reluctant her hands sought to be withdrawn her
shoulder avoiding my reclined cheek apparently loth and more loth to
quarrel with me her downcast eye confessing more than her lips can
utter now surely thought i is my time to try if she can forgive a
still bolder freedom than i had ever yet taken 

i then gave her struggling hands liberty i put one arm round her waist 
i imprinted a kiss on her sweet lip with a be quiet only and an averted
face as if she feared another 

encouraged by so gentle a repulse the tenderest things i said and then 
with my other hand drew aside the handkerchief that concealed the beauty
of beauties and pressed with my burning lips the most charming breast
that ever my ravished eyes beheld 

a very contrary passion to that which gave her bosom so delightful a
swell immediately took place she struggled out of my encircling arms
with indignation i detained her reluctant hand let me go said she 
i see there is no keeping terms with you base encroacher is this the
design of your flattering speeches far as matters have gone i will for
ever renounce you you have an odious heart let me go i tell you 

i was forced to obey and she flung from me repeating base and adding
flattering encroacher 


 


in vain have i urged by dorcas for the promised favour of dining with her 
she would not dine at all she could not 

but why makes she every inch of her person thus sacred so near the time
too that she must suppose that all will be my own by deed of purchase
and settlement 

she has read no doubt of the art of the eastern monarchs who sequester
themselves from the eyes of their subjects in order to excite their
adoration when upon some solemn occasions they think fit to appear in
public 

but let me ask thee belford whether on these solemn occasions the
preceding cavalcade here a greater officer and there a great minister 
with their satellites and glaring equipages do not prepare the eyes of
the wondering beholders by degrees to bear the blaze of canopy'd
majesty what though but an ugly old man perhaps himself yet glittering
in the collected riches of his vast empire 

and should not my beloved for her own sake descend by degrees from
goddess-hood into humanity if it be pride that restrains her ought not
that pride to be punished if as in the eastern emperors it be art as
well as pride art is what she of all women need not use if shame what
a shame to be ashamed to communicate to her adorer's sight the most
admirable of her personal graces 

let me perish belford if i would not forego the brightest diadem in the
world for the pleasure of seeing a twin lovelace at each charming
breast drawing from it his first sustenance the pious task for
physical reasons continued for one month and no more 


 in pamela vol iii letter xxxii these reasons are given and are
worthy of every parent's consideration as is the whole letter which
contains the debate between mr b and his pamela on the important
subject of mothers being nurses to their own children 


i now methinks behold this most charming of women in this sweet office 
her conscious eye now dropt on one now on the other with a sigh of
maternal tenderness and then raised up to my delighted eye full of
wishes for the sake of the pretty varlets and for her own sake that i
would deign to legitimate that i would condescend to put on the nuptial
fetters 



letter xii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday afternoon 


a letter received from the worthy captain tomlinson has introduced me
into the presence of my charmer sooner than perhaps i should otherwise
have been admitted 

sullen her brow at her first entrance into the dining-room but i took
no notice of what had passed and her anger of itself subsided 

the captain after letting me know that he chose not to write till he
had promised the draught of the settlements acquaint me that his friend
mr john harlowe in their first conference which was held as soon as he
got down was extremely surprised and even grieved as he feared he
would be to hear that we were not married the world he said who knew
my character would be very censorious were it owned that we had lived
so long together unmarried in the same lodgings although our marriage
were now to be ever so publicly celebrated 

his nephew james he was sure would make a great handle of it against
any motion that might be made towards a reconciliation and with the
greater success as there was not a family in the kingdom more jealous of
their honour than theirs 

this is true of the harlowes jack they have been called the proud
harlowes and i have ever found that all young honour is supercilious
and touchy 

but seest thou not how right i was in my endeavour to persuade my fair-
one to allow her uncle's friend to think us married especially as he
came prepared to believe it and as her uncle hoped it was so but
nothing on earth is so perverse as a woman when she is set upon carrying
a point and has a meek man or one who loves his peace to deal with 

my beloved was vexed she pulled out her handkerchief but was more
inclined to blame me than herself 

had you kept your word mr lovelace and left me when we came to
town and there she stopt for she knew that it was her own fault that
we were not married before we left the country and how could i leave her
afterwards while her brother was plotting to carry her off by violence 

nor has this brother yet given over his machinations 

for as the captain proceeds mr john harlowe owned to him but in
confidence that his nephew is at this time busied in endeavouring to
find out where we are being assured as i am not to be heard of at any
of my relations or at my usual lodgings that we are together and that
we are not married is plain as he will have it from mr hickman's
application so lately made to her uncle and which was seconded by mrs 
norton to her mother and her brother cannot bear that i should enjoy
such a triumph unmolested 

a profound sigh and the handkerchief again lifted to the eye but did
not the sweet soul deserve this turn upon her for feloniously resolving
to rob me of herself had the application made by hickman succeeded 

i read on to the following effect 

why asked mr harlowe was it said to his other inquiring friend that
we were married and that by his niece's woman who ought to know who
could give convincing reasons no doubt' 

here again she wept took a turn across the room then returned read on 
says she 

will you my dearest life read it yourself 

i will take the letter with me by-and-by i cannot see to read it just
now wiping her eyes read on let me hear it all that i may know your
sentiments upon this letter as well as give my own 

the captain then told uncle john the reasons that induced me to give out
that we were married and the conditions on which my beloved was brought
to countenance it which had kept us at the most punctilious distance 

but still mr harlowe objected my character and went away
dissatisfied and the captain was also so much concerned that he cared
not to write what the result of his first conference was 

but in the next which was held on receipt of the draughts at the
captain's house as the former was for the greater secrecy when the
old gentleman had read them and had the captain's opinion he was much
better pleased and yet he declared that it would not be easy to
persuade any other person of his family to believe so favourably of the
matter as he was now willing to believe were they to know that we had
lived so long together unmarried 

and then the captain says his dear friend made a proposal it was
this that we should marry out of hand but as privately as possible as
indeed he found we intended for he could have no objection to the
draughts but yet he expected to have present one trusty friend of his
own for his better satisfaction' 

here i stopt with a design to be angry but she desiring me to read on 
i obeyed 

 but that it should pass to every one living except to that trusty
person to himself and to the captain that we were married from the
time that we had lived together in one house and that this time should
be made to agree with that of mr hickman's application to him from miss
howe 

this my dearest life said i is a very considerate proposal we have
nothing to do but to caution the people below properly on this head i
did not think your uncle harlowe capable of hitting upon such a charming
expedient as this but you see how much his heart is in the
reconciliation 

this was the return i met with you have always as a mark of your
politeness let me know how meanly you think of every one in my family 

yet thou wilt think belford that i could forgive her for the reproach 

the captain does not know says he how this proposal will be relished
by us but for his part he thinks it an expedient that will obviate
many difficulties and may possibly put an end to mr james harlowe's
further designs and on this account he has by the uncle's advice 
already declared to two several persons by whose means it may come to
that young gentleman's that he  captain tomlinson  has very great reason
to believe that we were married soon after mr hickman's application was
rejected 

and this mr lovelace says the captain will enable you to pay a
compliment to the family that will not be unsuitable to the generosity
of some of the declarations you were pleased to make to the lady before
me and which mr john harlowe may make some advantage of in favour of a
reconciliation in that you were entitled to make the demand  an
excellent contriver surely she must think this worthy mr tomlinson to
be 

but the captain adds that if either the lady or i disapprove of his
report of our marriage he will retract it nevertheless he must tell
me that mr john harlowe is very much set upon this way of proceeding 
as the only one in his opinion capable of being improved into a general
reconciliation but if we do acquiesce in it he beseeches my fair-one
not to suspend my day that he may be authorized in what he says as to
the truth of the main fact  how conscientious this good man   nor must
it be expected he says that her uncle will take one step towards the
wished-for reconciliation till the solemnity is actually over 

he adds that he shall be very soon in town on other affairs and then
proposes to attend us and give us a more particular account of all that
has passed or shall further pass between mr harlowe and him 

well my dearest life what say you to your uncle's expedient shall i
write to the captain and acquaint him that we have no objection to it 

she was silent for a few minutes at last with a sigh see mr 
lovelace said she what you have brought me to by treading after you in
such crooked paths see what disgrace i have incurred indeed you have
not acted like a wise man 

my beloved creature do you not remember how earnestly i besought the
honour of your hand before we came to town had i been then favoured 

well well sir there has been much amiss somewhere that's all i will
say at present and since what's past cannot be recalled my uncle must
be obeyed i think 

charmingly dutiful i had nothing then to do that i might not be
behind-hand with the worthy captain and her uncle but to press for the
day this i fervently did but as i might have expected she repeated
her former answer to wit that when the settlements were completed when
the license was actually obtained it would be time enough to name the
day and o mr lovelace said she turning from me with a grace
inimitably tender her handkerchief at her eyes what a happiness if my
dear uncle could be prevailed upon to be personally a father on this
occasion to the poor fatherless girl 

what's the matter with me whence this dew-drop a tear as i hope to
be saved it is a tear jack very ready methinks only on
reciting but her lovely image was before me in the very attitude she
spoke the words and indeed at the time she spoke them these lines of
shakespeare came into my head 

 thy heart is big get thee apart and weep 
 passion i see is catching for my eye 
 seeing those beads of sorrow stand in thine 
 begin to water 

i withdrew and wrote to the captain to the following effect i desired
that he would be so good as to acquaint his dear friend that we entirely
acquiesced with what he had proposed and had already properly cautioned
the gentlewomen of the house and their servants as well as our own and
to tell him that if he would in person give me the blessing of his dear
niece's hand it would crown the wishes of both in this case i
consented that his own day as i presumed it would be a short one 
should be ours that by this means the secret would be with fewer
persons that i myself as well as he thought the ceremony could not be
too privately performed and this not only for the sake of the wise end
he had proposed to answer by it but because i would not have lord m 
think himself slighted since that nobleman as i had told him  the
captain  had once intended to be our nuptial-father and actually made
the offer but that we had declined to accept of it and that for no
other reason than to avoid a public wedding which his beloved niece
would not come into while she was in disgrace with her friends but
that if he chose not to do us this honour i wished that captain
tomlinson might be the trusty person whom he would have be present on the
happy occasion 

i showed this letter to my fair-one she was not displeased with it 
so jack we cannot now move too fast as to settlements and license the
day is her uncle's day or captain tomlinson's perhaps as shall best
suit the occasion miss howe's smuggling scheme is now surely provided
against in all events 

but i will not by anticipation make thee a judge of all the benefits that
may flow from this my elaborate contrivance why will these girls put me
upon my master-strokes 

and now for a little mine which i am getting ready to spring the first
that i have sprung and at the rate i go on now a resolution and now a
remorse perhaps the last that i shall attempt to spring 

a little mine i call it but it may be attended with great effects i
shall not however absolutely depend upon the success of it having much
more effectual ones in reserve and yet great engines are often moved by
small springs a little spark falling by accident into a powder-magazine 
hath done more execution in a siege than an hundred cannon 

come the worst the hymeneal torch and a white sheet must be my amende
honorable as the french have it 



letter xiii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
tuesday june 6 

unsuccessful as hitherto my application to you has been i cannot for the
heart of me forbear writing once more in behalf of this admirable woman 
and yet am unable to account for the zeal which impels me to take her
part with an earnestness so sincere 

but all her merit thou acknowledgest all thy own vileness thou
confessest and even gloriest in it what hope then of moving so hardened
a man yet as it is not too late and thou art nevertheless upon the
crisis i am resolved to try what another letter will do it is but my
writing in vain if it do no good and if thou wilt let me prevail i
knowthou wilt hereafter think me richly entitled to thy thanks 

to argue with thee would be folly the case cannot require it i will
only entreat thee therefore that thou wilt not let such an excellence
lose the reward of her vigilant virtue 

i believe there never were libertines so vile but purposed at some
future period of their lives to set about reforming and let me beg of
thee that thou wilt in this great article make thy future repentance
as easy as some time hence thou wilt wish thou hadst made it 

if thou proceedest i have no doubt that this affair will end tragically 
one way or another it must such a woman must interest both gods and
men in her cause but what i most apprehend is that with her own hand 
in resentment of the perpetrated outrage she like another lucretia 
will assert the purity of her heart or if her piety preserve her from
this violence that wasting grief will soon put a period to her days 
and in either case will not the remembrance of thy ever-during guilt 
and transitory triumph be a torment of torments to thee 

tis a seriously sad thing after all that so fine a creature should
have fallen into such vile and remorseless hands for from thy cradle 
as i have heard thee own thou ever delightedst to sport with and torment
the animal whether bird or beast that thou lovedst and hadst a power
over 

how different is the case of this fine woman from that of any other whom
thou hast seduced i need not mention to thee nor insist upon the
striking difference justice gratitude thy interest thy vows all
engaging thee and thou certainly loving her as far as thou art capable
of love above all her sex she not to be drawn aside by art or to be
made to suffer from credulity nor for want of wit and discernment that
will be another cutting reflection to so fine a mind as her's the
contention between you only unequal as it is between naked innocence and
armed guilt in every thing else as thou ownest her talents greatly
superior to thine what a fate will her's be if thou art not at last
overcome by thy reiterated remorses 

at first indeed when i was admitted into her presence and till i
observed her meaning air and heard her speak i supposed that she had
no very uncommon judgment to boast of for i made as i thought but just
allowances for her blossoming youth and for that loveliness of person 
and for that ease and elegance in her dress which i imagined must have
taken up half her time and study to cultivate and yet i had been
prepared by thee to entertain a very high opinion of her sense and her
reading her choice of this gay fellow upon such hazardous terms 
 thought i is a confirmation that her wit wants that maturity which
only years and experience can give it her knowledge argued i to
myself must be all theory and the complaisance ever consorting with an
age so green and so gay will make so inexperienced a lady at least
forbear to show herself disgusted at freedoms of discourse in which those
present of her own sex and some of ours so learned so well read and
so travelled allow themselves 


 see vol iv letter vii 


in this presumption i ran on and having the advantage as i conceited 
of all the company but you and being desirous to appear in her eyes a
mighty clever fellow i thought i showed away when i said any foolish
things that had more sound than sense in them and when i made silly
jests which attracted the smiles of thy sinclair and the specious
partington and that miss harlowe did not smile too i thought was owing
to her youth or affectation or to a mixture of both perhaps to a
greater command of her features little dreamt i that i was incurring
her contempt all the time 

but when as i said i heard her speak which she did not till she had
fathomed us all when i heard her sentiments on two or three subjects 
and took notice of the searching eye darting into the very inmost cells
of our frothy brains by my faith it made me look about me and i began
to recollect and be ashamed of all i had said before in short was
resolved to sit silent till every one had talked round to keep my folly
in countenance and then i raised the subjects that she could join in 
and which she did join in so much to the confusion and surprise of every
one of us for even thou lovelace so noted for smart wit repartee 
and a vein of raillery that delighteth all who come near thee sattest
in palpable darkness and lookedst about thee as well as we 

one instance only of this shall i remind thee of 

we talked of wit and of it and aimed at it bandying it like a ball
from one to another and resting it chiefly with thee who wert always
proud enough and vain enough of the attribute and then more especially
as thou hadst assembled us as far as i know principally to show the
lady thy superiority over us and us thy triumph over her and then
tourville who is always satisfied with wit at second-hand wit upon
memory other men's wit repeated some verses as applicable to the
subject which two of us applauded though full of double entendre 
thou seeing the lady's serious air on one of those repetitions 
appliedst thyself to her desiring her notions of wit a quality thou
saidst which every one prized whether flowing from himself or found in
another 

then it was that she took all our attention it was a quality much
talked of she said but she believed very little understood at
least if she might be so free as to give her judgment of it from what
had passed in the present conversation she must say that wit with men
was one thing with women another 

this startled us all how the women looked how they pursed their
mouths a broad smile the moment before upon each from the verses they
had heard repeated so well understood as we saw by their looks while
i besought her to let us know for our instruction what wit with women 
for such i was sure it ought to be with men 

cowley she said had defined it prettily by negatives thou desiredst
her to repeat his definition 

she did and with so much graceful ease and beauty and propriety of
accent as would have made bad poetry delightful 

 a thousand diff'rent shapes it bears 
 comely in thousand shapes appears 
 tis not a tale tis not a jest 
 admir'd with laughter at a feast 
 nor florid talk which must this title gain 
 the proofs of wit for ever must remain 
 much less can that have any place
 at which a virgin hides her face 
 such dross the fire must purge away tis just
 the author blush there where the reader must 

here she stopt looking round upon her upon us all with conscious
superiority as i thought lord how we stared thou attemptedst to
give us thy definition of wit that thou mightest have something to say 
and not seem to be surprised into silent modesty 

but as if she cared not to trust thee with the subject referring to the
same author as for his more positive decision she thus with the same
harmony of voice and accent emphatically decided upon it 

 wit like a luxurious vine 
 unless to virtue's prop it join 
 firm and erect tow'rd heaven bound 
tho' it with beauteous leaves and pleasant fruit be crown'd 
it lies deform'd and rotting on the ground 

if thou recollectest this part of the conversation and how like fools we
looked at one another how much it put us out of conceit with ourselves 
and made us fear her when we found our conversation thus excluded from
the very character which our vanity had made us think unquestionably
ours and if thou profitest properly by the recollection thou wilt be of
my mind that there is not so much wit in wickedness as we had flattered
ourselves there was 

and after all i have been of opinion ever since that conversation that
the wit of all the rakes and libertines down to little johnny hartop the
punster consists mostly in saying bold and shocking things with such
courage as shall make the modest blush the impudent laugh and the
ignorant stare 

and why dost thou think i mention these things so mal-a-propos as it
may seem only let me tell thee as an instance among many that might
be given from the same evening's conversation of this fine woman's
superiority in those talents which ennoble nature and dignify her
sex evidenced not only to each of us as we offended but to the
flippant partington and the grosser but egregiously hypocritical
sinclair in the correcting eye the discouraging blush in which was
mixed as much displeasure as modesty and sometimes as the occasion
called for it for we were some of us hardened above the sense of
feeling delicate reproof by the sovereign contempt mingled with a
disdainful kind of pity that showed at once her own conscious worth and
our despicable worthlessness 

o lovelace what then was the triumph even in my eye and what is it
still upon reflection of true jest laughing impertinence and an
obscenity so shameful even to the guilty that they cannot hint at it
but under a double meaning 

then as thou hast somewhere observed all her correctives avowed by her
eye not poorly like the generality of her sex affecting ignorance of
meanings too obvious to be concealed but so resenting as to show each
impudent laugher the offence given to and taken by a purity that had
mistaken its way when it fell into such company 


 see vol iv letter xlviii 


such is the woman such is the angel whom thou hast betrayed into thy
power and wouldst deceive and ruin sweet creature did she but know
how she is surrounded as i then thought as well as now think and
what is intended how much sooner would death be her choice than so
dreadful a situation and how effectually would her story were it
generally known warn all the sex against throwing themselves into the
power of ours let our vows oaths and protestations be what they
will 

but let me beg of thee once more my dear lovelace if thou hast any
regard for thine own honour for the honour of thy family for thy future
peace or for my opinion of thee who yet pretend not to be so much
moved by principle as by that dazzling merit which ought still more to
attract thee to be prevailed upon to be to be humane that's all 
only that thou wouldst not disgrace our common humanity 

hardened as thou art i know that they are the abandoned people in the
house who keep thee up to a resolution against her o that the sagacious
fair-one with so much innocent charity in her own heart had not so
resolutely held those women at distance that as she boarded there she
had oftener tabled with them specious as they are in a week's time 
she would have seen through them they could not have been always so
guarded as they were when they saw her but seldom and when they
prepared themselves to see her and she would have fled their house as a
place infected and yet perhaps with so determined an enterprizer 
this discovery might have accelerated her ruin 

i know that thou art nice in thy loves but are there not hundreds of
women who though not utterly abandoned would be taken with thee for
mere personal regards make a toy if thou wilt of principle with
respect to such of the sex as regard it as a toy but rob not an angel of
those purities which in her own opinion constitute the difference
between angelic and brutal qualities 

with regard to the passion itself the less of soul in either man or
woman the more sensual are they thou lovelace hast a soul though a
corrupted one and art more intent as thou even gloriest upon the
preparative stratagem that upon the end of conquering 

see we not the natural bent of idiots and the crazed the very appetite
is body and when we ourselves are most fools and crazed then are we
most eager in these pursuits see what fools this passion makes the
wisest men what snivellers what dotards when they suffer themselves
to be run away with by it an unpermanent passion since if ashamed
of its more proper name we must call it love love gratified is love
satisfied and where consent on one side adds to the obligation on the
other what then but remorse can follow a forcible attempt 

do not even chaste lovers choose to be alone in their courtship
preparations ashamed to have even a child to witness to their foolish
actions and more foolish expressions is this deified passion in its
greatest altitudes fitted to stand the day do not the lovers when
mutual consent awaits their wills retire to coverts and to darkness to
complete their wishes and shall such a sneaking passion as this which
can be so easily gratified by viler objects be permitted to debase the
noblest 

were not the delays of thy vile purposes owing more to the awe which her
majestic virtue has inspired thee with than to thy want of adroitness in
villany  i must write my free sentiments in this case for have i not
seen the angel   i should be ready to censure some of thy contrivances
and pretences to suspend the expected day as trite stale and to me 
who know thy intention poor and too often resorted to as nothing comes
of them to be gloried in particularly that of mennell the vapourish
lady and the ready-furnished house 

she must have thought so too at times and in her heart despised thee
for them or love thee ungrateful as thou art to her misfortune as
well as entertain hope against probability but this would afford
another warning to the sex were they to know her story as it would
show them what poor pretences they must seem to be satisfied with if
once they put themselves into the power of a designing man 

if trial only was thy end as once was thy pretence enough surely hast
thou tried this paragon of virtue and vigilance but i knew thee too
well to expect at the time that thou wouldest stop there men of our
cast put no other bound to their views upon any of the sex than what want
of power compels them to put  i knew that from one advantage gained 
thou wouldest proceed to attempt another thy habitual aversion to
wedlock too well i knew and indeed thou avowest thy hope to bring her to
cohabitation in that very letter in which thou pretendest trial to be
thy principal view 


 see vol iii letter xviii 
 ibid see also letters xvi and xvii of that volume 


but do not even thy own frequent and involuntary remorses when thou hast
time place company and every other circumstance to favour thee in thy
wicked design convince thee that there can be no room for a hope so
presumptuous why then since thou wouldest choose to marry her rather
than lose her wilt thou make her hate thee for ever 

but if thou darest to meditate personal trial and art sincere in thy
resolution to reward her as she behaves in it let me beseech thee to
remove her from this vile house that will be to give her and thy
conscience fair play so entirely now does the sweet deluded excellence
depend upon her supposed happier prospects that thou needest not to fear
that she will fly from thee or that she will wish to have recourse to
that scheme of miss howe which has put thee upon what thou callest thy
master-strokes 

but whatever be thy determination on this head and if i write not in
time but that thou hast actually pulled off the mask let it not be one
of the devices if thou wouldest avoid the curses of every heart and
hereafter of thy own to give her no not for one hour be her
resentment ever so great into the power of that villanous woman who
has if possible less remorse than thyself and whose trade it is to
break the resisting spirit and utterly to ruin the heart unpractised in
evil o lovelace lovelace how many dreadful stories could this horrid
woman tell the sex and shall that of a clarissa swell the guilty list 

but this i might have spared of this devil as thou art thou canst not
be capable thou couldst not enjoy a triumph so disgraceful to thy
wicked pride as well as to humanity 

shouldest thou think that the melancholy spectacle hourly before me has
made me more serious than usual perhaps thou wilt not be mistaken but
nothing more is to be inferred from hence were i even to return to my
former courses but that whenever the time of cool reflection comes 
whether brought on by our own disasters or by those of others we shall
undoubtedly if capable of thought and if we have time for it think in
the same manner 

we neither of us are such fools as to disbelieve a futurity or to think 
whatever be our practice that we came hither by chance and for no end
but to do all the mischief we have it in our power to do nor am i
ashamed to own that in the prayers which my poor uncle makes me read to
him in the absence of a very good clergyman who regularly attends him i
do not forget to put in a word or two for myself 

if lovelace thou laughest at me thy ridicule will be more conformable
to thy actions than to thy belief devils believe and tremble canst
thou be more abandoned than they 

and here let me add with regard to my poor old man that i often wish
thee present but for one half hour in a day to see the dregs of a gay
life running off in the most excruciating tortures that the cholic the
stone and the surgeon's knife can unitedly inflict and to hear him
bewail the dissoluteness of his past life in the bitterest anguish of a
spirit every hour expecting to be called to its last account yet by
all his confessions he has not to accuse himself in sixty-seven years
of life of half the very vile enormities which you and i have committed
in the last seven only 

i conclude with recommending to your serious consideration all i have
written as proceeding from the heart and soul of

your assured friend 
john belford



letter xiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday afternoon june 6 


difficulties still to be got over in procuring this plaguy license i
ever hated and ever shall hate these spiritual lawyers and their
court 

and now jack if i have not secured victory i have a retreat 

but hold thy servant with a letter 


 


a confounded long one though not a narrative one once more in behalf of
this lady lie thee down oddity what canst thou write that can have
force upon me at this crisis and have i not as i went along made thee
to say all that was necessary for thee to say 


 


yet once more i will take thee up 

trite stale poor sayest thou are some of my contrivances that of
the widow particularly i have no patience with thee had not that
contrivance its effect at that time for a procrastination and had i not
then reason to fear that the lady would find enough to make her dislike
this house and was it not right intending what i intended to lead her
on from time to time with a notion that a house of her own would be ready
for her soon in order to induce her to continue here till it was 

trite stale and poor thou art a silly fellow and no judge when thou
sayest this had i not like a blockhead revealed to thee as i went
along the secret purposes of my heart but had kept all in till the event
had explained my mysteries i would have defied thee to have been able 
any more than the lady to have guessed at what was to befall her till
it had actually come to pass nor doubt i in this case that instead
of presuming to reflect upon her for credulity as loving me to her
misfortune and for hoping against probability thou wouldest have been
readier by far to censure her for nicety and over-scrupulousness and 
let me tell thee that had she loved me as i wished her to love me she
could not possibly have been so very apprehensive of my designs nor so
ready to be influenced by miss howe's precautions as she has always
been although my general character made not for me with her 

but in thy opinion i suffer for that simplicity in my contrivances 
which is their principal excellence no machinery make i necessary no
unnatural flights aim i at all pure nature taking advantage of nature 
as nature tends and so simple my devices that when they are known 
thou even thou imaginest thou couldest have thought of the same and
indeed thou seemest to own that the slight thou puttest upon them is
owing to my letting thee into them before-hand undistingushing as well
as ungrateful as thou art 

yet after all i would not have thee think that i do not know my weak
places i have formerly told thee that it is difficult for the ablest
general to say what he will do or what he can do when he is obliged to
regulate his motions by those of a watchful enemy if thou givest due
weight to this consideration thou wilt not wonder that i should make
many marches and countermarches some of which may appear to a slight
observer unnecessary 


 see vol iii letter xxxix 


but let me cursorily enter into debate with thee on this subject now i
am within sight of my journey's end 

abundance of impertinent things thou tellest me in this letter some of
which thou hadst from myself others that i knew before 

all that thou sayest in this charming creature's praise is short of what
i have said and written on the inexhaustible subject 

her virtue her resistance which are her merits are my stimulatives 
have i not told thee so twenty times over 

devil as these girls between them call me what of devil am i but in my
contrivances i am not more a devil than others in the end i aim at for
when i have carried my point it is still but one seduction and i have
perhaps been spared the guilt of many seductions in the time 

what of uncommon would there be in this case but for her
watchfulness as well as i love intrigue and stratagem dost think that
i had not rather have gained my end with less trouble and less guilt 

the man let me tell thee who is as wicked as he can be is a worse man
than i am let me ask any rake in england if resolving to carry his
point he would have been so long about it or have had so much
compunction as i have had 

were every rake nay were every man to sit down as i do and write all
that enters into his head or into his heart and to accuse himself with
equal freedom and truth what an army of miscreants should i have to keep
me in countenance 

it is a maxim with some that if they are left alone with a woman and
make not an attempt upon her she will think herself affronted are not
such men as these worse than i am what an opinion must they have of the
whole sex 

let me defend the sex i so dearly love if these elder brethren of ours
think they have general reason for their assertion they must have kept
very bad company or must judge of women's hearts by their own she must
be an abandoned woman who will not shrink as a snail into its shell at a
gross and sudden attempt a modest woman must be naturally cold 
reserved and shy she cannot be so much and so soon affected as
libertines are apt to imagine she must at least have some confidence
in the honour and silence of a man before desire can possibly put forth
in her to encourage and meet his flame for my own part i have been
always decent in the company of women till i was sure of them nor have
i ever offered a great offence till i have found little ones passed
over and that they shunned me not when they knew my character 

my divine clarissa has puzzled me and beat me out of my play at one
time i hope to overcome by intimidating her at another by love by the
amorous see-saw as i have called it and i have only now to join
surprise to the other two and see what can be done by all three 


 see vol iii letter xvi 


and whose property i pray thee shall i invade if i pursue my schemes
of love and vengeance have not those who have a right to her renounced
that right have they not wilfully exposed her to dangers yet must
know that such a woman would be considered as lawful prize by as many as
could have the opportunity to attempt her and had they not thus cruelly
exposed her is she not a single woman and need i tell thee jack that
men of our cast the best of them  the worst stick at nothing  think it a
great grace and favour done to the married men if they leave them their
wives to themselves and compound for their sisters daughters wards
and nieces shocking as these principles must be to a reflecting mind 
yet such thou knowest are the principles of thousands who would not act
so generously as i have acted by almost all of the sex over whom i have
obtained a power and as often carried into practice as their
opportunities or courage will permit such therefore have no right to
blame me 

thou repeatedly pleadest her sufferings from her family but i have too
often answered this plea to need to say any more now than that she has
not suffered for my sake for has she not been made the victim of the
malice of her rapacious brother and envious sister who only waited for
an occasion to ruin her with her other relations and took this as the
first to drive her out of the house and as it happened into my arms 
thou knowest how much against her inclination 

as for her own sins how many has the dear creature to answer for to love
and to me twenty times and twenty times twenty has she not told me 
that she refused not the odious solmes in favour to me and as often has
she not offered to renounce me for the single life if the implacables
would have received her on that condition of what repetitions does thy
weak pity make me guilty 

to look a litter farther back canst thou forget what my sufferings were
from this haughty beauty in the whole time of my attendance upon her
proud motions in the purlieus of harlowe-place and at the little white
hart at neale as we called it did i not threaten vengeance upon her
then and had i not reason for disappointing me of a promised
interview 

o jack what a night had i in the bleak coppice adjoining to her father's
paddock my linen and wig frozen my limbs absolutely numbed my fingers
only sensible of so much warmth as enabled me to hold a pen and that
obtained by rubbing the skin off and by beating with my hands my
shivering sides kneeling on the hoar moss on one knee writing on the
other if the stiff scrawl could be called writing my feet by the time
i had done seeming to have taken root and actually unable to support me
for some minutes love and rage then kept my heart in motion  and only
love and rage could do it   or how much more than i did suffer must i
have suffered 

i told thee at my melancholy return what were the contents of the
letter i wrote and i showed thee afterwards her tyrannical answer to
it thou then jack lovedst thy friend and pitiedst thy poor
suffering lovelace even the affronted god of love approved then of my
threatened vengeance against the fair promiser though of the night of my
sufferings he is become an advocate for her 


 see vol ii letter xx 
 ibid 


nay was it not he himself that brought to me my adorable nemesis and
both together put me upon this very vow that i would never rest till i
had drawn in this goddess-daughter of the harlowes to cohabit with me 
and that in the face of all their proud family 

nor canst thou forget this vow at this instant i have thee before me 
as then thou sorrowfully lookedst thy strong features glowing with
compassion for me thy lips twisted thy forehead furrowed thy whole
face drawn out from the stupid round into the ghastly oval every muscle
contributing its power to complete the aspect grievous and not one word
couldst thou utter but amen to my vow 

and what of distinguishing love or favour or confidence have i had
from her since to make me forego this vow 

i renewed it not indeed afterwards and actually for a long season 
was willing to forget it till repetitions of the same faults revived the
remembrance of the former and now adding to those the contents of some
of miss howe's virulent letters so lately come at what canst thou say
for the rebel consistent with thy loyalty to thy friend 

every man to his genius and constitution hannibal was called the father
of warlike stratagems had hannibal been a private man and turned his
plotting head against the other sex or had i been a general and turned
mine against such of my fellow-creatures of my own as i thought myself
entitled to consider as my enemies because they were born and lived in a
different climate hannibal would have done less mischief lovelace
more that would have been the difference 

not a sovereign on earth if he be not a good man and if he be of a
warlike temper but must do a thousand times more mischief than i and
why because he has it in his power to do more 

an honest man perhaps thou'lt say will not wish to have it in his power
to do hurt he ought not let me tell him for if he have it a
thousand to one but it makes him both wanton and wicked 

in what then am i so singularly vile 

in my contrivances thou wilt say for thou art my echo if not in my
proposed end of them 

how difficult does every man find it as well as i to forego a
predominant passion i have three passions that sway me by turns all
imperial ones love revenge ambition or a desire of conquest 

as to this particular contrivance of tomlinson and the uncle which
perhaps thou wilt think a black one that had been spared had not these
innocent ladies put me upon finding a husband for their mrs townsend 
that device therefore is but a preventive one thinkest thou that i
could bear to be outwitted and may not this very contrivance save a
world of mischief for dost thou think i would have tamely given up the
lady to townsend's tars 

what meanest thou except to overthrow thy own plea when thou sayest 
that men of our cast know no other bound to their wickedness but want of
power yet knowest this lady to be in mine 

enough sayest thou have i tried this paragon of virtue not so for i
have not tried her at all all i have been doing is but preparation to a
trial 

but thou art concerned for the means that i may have recourse to in the
trial and for my veracity 

silly fellow did ever any man thinkest thou deceive a woman but at
the expense of his veracity how otherwise can he be said to deceive 

as to the means thou dost not imagine that i expect a direct consent 
my main hope is but in a yielding reluctance without which i will be
sworn whatever rapes have been attempted none ever were committed one
person to one person and good queen bess of england had she been
living and appealed to would have declared herself of my mind 

it would not be amiss for the sex to know what our opinions are upon this
subject i love to warn them i wish no man to succeed with them but
myself i told thee once that though a rake i am not a rake's friend 


 see vol iii letter xviii 


thou sayest that i ever hated wedlock and true thou sayest and yet
as true when thou tellest me that i would rather marry than lose this
lady and will she detest me for ever thinkest thou if i try her and
succeed not take care take care jack seest thou not that thou
warnest me that i do not try without resolving to conquer 

i must add that i have for some time been convinced that i have done
wrong to scribble to thee so freely as i have done and the more so if i
make the lady legally mine for has not every letter i have written to
thee been a bill of indictment against myself i may partly curse my
vanity for it and i think i will refrain for the future for thou art
really very impertinent 

a good man i own might urge many of the things thou urgest but by my
soul they come very awkwardly from thee and thou must be sensible 
that i can answer every tittle of what you writest upon the foot of the
maxims we have long held and pursued by the specimen above thou wilt
see that i can 

and pr'ythee tell me jack what but this that follows would have been
the epitome of mine and my beloved's story after ten years'
cohabitation had i never written to thee upon the subject and had i not
been my own accuser 

robert lovelace a notorious woman-eater makes his addresses in an
honourable way to miss clarissa harlowe a young lady of the highest
merit fortunes on both sides out of the question 

after encouragement given he is insulted by her violent brother who
thinks it his interest to discountenance the match and who at last
challenging him is obliged to take his worthless life at his hands 

the family as much enraged as if he had taken the life he gave insult
him personally and find out an odious lover for the young lady 

to avoid a forced marriage she is prevailed upon to take a step which
throws her into mr lovelace's protection 

yet disclaiming any passion for him she repeatedly offers to renounce
him for ever if on that condition her relations will receive her and
free her from the address of the man she hates 

mr lovelace a man of strong passions and as some say of great
pride thinks himself under very little obligation to her on this
account and not being naturally fond of marriage and having so much
reason to hate her relations endeavours to prevail upon her to live with
him what he calls the life of honour and at last by stratagem art and
contrivance prevails 

he resolves never to marry any other woman takes a pride to have her
called by his name a church-rite all the difference between them treats
her with deserved tenderness nobody questions their marriage but those
proud relations of her's whom he wishes to question it every year a
charming boy fortunes to support the increasing family with splendor 
a tender father always a warm friend a generous landlord and a
punctual paymaster now-and-then however perhaps indulging with a new
object in order to bring him back with greater delight to his charming
clarissa his only fault love of the sex which nevertheless the women
say will cure itself defensible thus far that he breaks no contracts
by his rovings  

and what is there so very greatly amiss as the world goes in all this 

let me aver that there are thousands and ten thousands who have worse
stories to tell than this would appear to be had i not interested thee
in the progress to my great end and besides thou knowest that the
character i gave myself to joseph leman as to my treatment of my
mistress is pretty near the truth 


 see vol iii letter xlviii 


were i to be as much in earnest in my defence as thou art warm in my
arraignment i could convince thee by other arguments observations and
comparisons  is not all human good and evil comparative   that though
from my ingenuous temper writing only to thee who art master of every
secret of my heart i am so ready to accuse myself in my narrations yet
i have something to say for myself to myself as i go along though no
one else perhaps that was not a rake would allow any weight to it 
and this caution might i give to thousands who would stoop for a stone
to throw at me see that your own predominant passions whatever they
be hurry you not into as much wickedness as mine do me see if ye
happen to be better than i in some things that ye are not worse in
others and in points too that may be of more extensive bad consequence 
than that of seducing a girl and taking care of her afterwards who 
from her cradle is armed with cautions against the delusions of men 
and yet i am not so partial to my own follies as to think lightly of this
fault when i allow myself to think 

another grave thing i will add now my hand is in so dearly do i love
the sex that had i found that a character for virtue had been generally
necessary to recommend me to them i should have had a much greater
regard to my morals as to the sex than i have had 

to sum all up i am sufficiently apprized that men of worthy and honest
hearts who never allowed themselves in premeditated evil and who take
into the account the excellencies of this fine creature will and must
not only condemn but abhor me were they to know as much of me as thou
dost but methinks i would be glad to escape the censure of those men 
and of those women too who have never known what capital trials and
temptations are of those who have no genius for enterprise of those who
want rather courage than will and most particularly of those who have
only kept their secret better than i have kept or wish to keep mine 
were those exceptions to take place perhaps jack i should have ten to
acquit to one that should condemn me have i not often said that human
nature is a rogue 


 


i threatened above to refrain writing to thee but take it not to heart 
jack i must write on and cannot help it 



letter xv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wednesday night eleven o'clock 


faith jack thou hadst half undone me with thy nonsense though i would
not own it on my yesterday's letter my conscience of thy party before 
but i think i am my own man again 

so near to execution my plot so near springing my mine all agreed upon
between the women and me or i believe thou hadst overthrown me 

i have time for a few lines preparative to what is to happen in an hour
or two and i love to write to the moment 

we have been extremely happy how many agreeable days have we known
together what may the next two hours produce 

when i parted with my charmer which i did with infinite reluctance 
half an hour ago it was upon her promise that she would not sit up to
write or read for so engaging was the conversation to me and indeed
my behaviour throughout the whole of it was confessedly agreeable to
her that i insisted if she did not directly retire to rest that she
should add another happy hour to the former 

to have sat up writing or reading half the night as she sometimes does 
would have frustrated my view as thou wilt observe when my little plot
unravels 


 


what what what now bounding villain wouldst thou choke me 

i was speaking to my heart jack it was then at my throat and what is
all this for these shy women how when a man thinks himself near the
mark do they tempest him 


 


is all ready dorcas has my beloved kept her word with me whether are
these billowy heavings owing more to love or to fear i cannot tell for
the soul of me of which i have most if i can but take her before her
apprehension before her eloquence is awake 

limbs why thus convulsed knees till now so firmly knit why thus
relaxed why beat you thus together will not these trembling fingers 
which twice have refused to direct the pen fail me in the arduous
moment 

once again why and for what all these convulsions this project is not
to end in matrimony surely 

but the consequences must be greater than i had thought of till this
moment my beloved's destiny or my own may depend upon the issue of the
two next hours 

i will recede i think 


 


soft o virgin saint and safe as soft be thy slumbers 

i will now once more turn to my friend belford's letter thou shalt have
fair play my charmer i will reperuse what thy advocate has to say for
thee weak arguments will do in the frame i am in 

but what what's the matter what a double but the uproar abates what
a double coward am i or is it that i am taken in a cowardly minute for
heroes have their fits of fear cowards their brave moments and virtuous
women all but my clarissa their moment critical 

but thus coolly enjoying the reflection in a hurricane again the
confusion is renewed 

what where how came it 

is my beloved safe 

o wake not too roughly my beloved 



letter xvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
thursday morning five o'clock june 8 


now is my reformation secure for i never shall love any other woman oh 
she is all variety she must ever be new to me imagination cannot
form much less can the pencil paint nor can the soul of painting 
poetry describe an angel so exquisitely so elegantly lovely but i
will not by anticipation pacify thy impatience although the subject is
too hallowed for profane contemplation yet shalt thou have the whole
before thee as it passed and this not from a spirit wantoning in
description upon so rich a subject but with a design to put a bound to
thy roving thoughts it will be iniquity greater than a lovelace was
ever guilty of to carry them farther than i shall acknowledge 

thus then connecting my last with the present i lead to it 

didst thou not by the conclusion of my former perceive the
consternation i was in just as i was about to reperuse thy letter in
order to prevail upon myself to recede from my purpose of awaking in
terrors my slumbering charmer and what dost think was the matter 

i'll tell thee 

at a little after two when the whole house was still or seemed to be
so and as it proved my clarissa in bed and fast asleep i also in a
manner undressed as indeed i was for an hour before and in my gown and
slippers though to oblige thee writing on i was alarmed by a
trampling noise over head and a confused buz of mixed voices some
louder than others like scolding and little short of screaming while
i was wondering what could be the matter down stairs ran dorcas and at
my door in an accent rather frightedly and hoarsely inward than shrilly
clamorous she cried out fire fire and this the more alarmed me as
she seemed to endeavour to cry out louder but could not 

my pen its last scrawl a benediction on my beloved dropped from my
fingers and up started i and making but three steps to the door 
opening it cried out where where almost as much terrified as the
wench while she more than half undrest her petticoats in her hand 
unable to speak distinctly pointed up stairs 

i was there in a moment and found all owing to the carelessness of mrs 
sinclair's cook-maid who having sat up to read the simple history of
dorastus and faunia when she should have been in bed had set fire to an
old pair of calico window-curtains 

she had had the presence of mind in her fright to tear down the half-
burnt vallens as well as curtains and had got them though blazing 
into the chimney by the time i came up so that i had the satisfaction
to find the danger happily over 

mean time dorcas after she had directed me up stairs not knowing the
worst was over and expecting every minute the house would be in a blaze 
out of tender regard for her lady  i shall for ever love the wench for
it   ran to her door and rapping loudly at it in a recovered voice 
cried out with a shrillness equal to her love fire fire the house is
on fire rise madam this instant rise if you would not be burnt in
your bed 

no sooner had she made this dreadful out-cry but i heard her lady's
door with hasty violence unbar unbolt unlock and open and my
charmer's voice sounding like that of one going into a fit 

thou mayest believe that i was greatly affected i trembled with concern
for her and hastened down faster than the alarm of fire had made me run
up in order to satisfy her that all the danger was over 

when i had flown down to her chamber-door there i beheld the most
charming creature in the world supporting herself on the arm of the
gasping dorcas sighing trembling and ready to faint with nothing on
but an under petticoat her lovely bosom half open and her feet just
slipped into her shoes as soon as she saw me she panted and
struggled to speak but could only say o mr lovelace and down was
ready to sink 

i clasped her in my arms with an ardour she never felt before my dearest
life fear nothing i have been up the danger is over the fire is got
under and how foolish devil  to dorcas   could you thus by your
hideous yell alarm and frighten my angel 

o jack how her sweet bosom as i clasped her to mine heaved and panted 
i could even distinguish her dear heart flutter flutter against mine 
and for a few minutes i feared she would go into fits 

lest the half-lifeless charmer should catch cold in this undress i
lifted her to her bed and sat down by her upon the side of it 
endeavouring with the utmost tenderness as well of action as expression 
to dissipate her terrors 

but what did i get by this my generous care of her and my successful
endeavour to bring her to herself nothing ungrateful as she was but
the most passionate exclamations for we had both already forgotten the
occasion dreadful as it was which had thrown her into my arms i from
the joy of encircling the almost disrobed body of the loveliest of her
sex she from the greater terrors that arose from finding herself in my
arms and both seated on the bed from which she had been so lately
frighted 

and now belford reflect upon the distance at which the watchful charmer
had hitherto kept me reflect upon my love and upon my sufferings for
her reflect upon her vigilance and how long i had laid in wait to elude
it the awe i had stood in because of her frozen virtue and
over-niceness and that i never before was so happy with her and then
think how ungovernable must be my transports in those happy moments and
yet in my own account i was both decent and generous 

but far from being affected as i wished by an address so fervent 
 although from a man from whom she had so lately owned a regard and with
whom but an hour or two before she had parted with so much
satisfaction i never saw a bitterer or more moving grief when she
came fully to herself 

she appealed to heaven against my treachery as she called it while i 
by the most solemn vows pleaded my own equal fright and the reality of
the danger that had alarmed us both 

she conjured me in the most solemn and affecting manner by turns
threatening and soothing to quit her apartment and permit her to hide
herself from the light and from every human eye 

i besought her pardon yet could not avoid offending and repeatedly
vowed that the next morning's sun should witness our espousals but
taking i suppose all my protestations of this kind as an indication
that i intended to proceed to the last extremity she would hear nothing
that i said but redoubling her struggles to get from me in broken
accents and exclamations the most vehement she protested that she
would not survive what she called a treatment so disgraceful and
villanous and looking all wildly round her as if for some instrument
of mischief she espied a pair of sharp-pointed scissors on a chair by
the bed-side and endeavoured to catch them up with design to make her
words good on the spot 

seeing her desperation i begged her to be pacified that she would hear
me speak but one word declaring that i intended no dishonour to her and
having seized the scissors i threw them into the chimney and she still
insisting vehemently upon my distance i permitted her to take the chair 

but o the sweet discomposure her bared shoulders and arms so
inimitably fair and lovely her spread hands crossed over her charming
neck yet not half concealing its glossy beauties the scanty coat as
she rose from me giving the whole of her admirable shape and fine-
turn'd limbs her eyes running over yet seeming to threaten future
vengeance 
and at last her lips uttering what every indignant look and glowing
feature portended exclaiming as if i had done the worst i could do and
vowing never to forgive me wilt thou wonder if i resumed the incensed 
the already too-much-provoked fair-one 

i did and clasped her once more to my bosom but considering the
delicacy of her frame her force was amazing and showed how much in
earnest she was in her resentment for it was with the utmost difficulty
that i was able to hold her nor could i prevent her sliding through my
arms to fall upon her knees which she did at my feet and there in the
anguish of her soul her streaming eyes lifted up to my face with
supplicating softness hands folded dishevelled hair for her night
head-dress having fallen off in her struggling her charming tresses fell
down in naturally shining ringlets as if officious to conceal the
dazzling beauties of her neck and shoulders her lovely bosom too heaving
with sighs and broken sobs as if to aid her quivering lips in pleading
for her in this manner but when her grief gave way to her speech in
words pronounced with that emphatical propriety which distinguishes this
admirable creature in her elocution from all the women i ever heard
speak did she implore my compassion and my honour 

consider me dear lovelace   dear was her charming word   on my knees
i beg you to consider me as a poor creature who has no protector but you 
who has no defence but your honour by that honour by your humanity by
all you have vowed i conjure you not to make me abhor myself not to
make me vile in my own eyes 

i mentioned to-morrow as the happiest day of my life 

tell me not of to-morrow if indeed you mean me honourably now this
very instant now you must show it and be gone you can never in a whole
long life repair the evils you now make me suffer 

wicked wretch insolent villain yes she called me insolent villain 
although so much in my power and for what only for kissing with
passion indeed her inimitable neck her lips her cheeks her forehead 
and her streaming eyes as this assemblage of beauties offered itself at
once to my ravished sight she continuing kneeling at my feet as i sat 

if i am a villain madam and then my grasping but trembling hand i
hope i did not hurt the tenderest and loveliest of all her beauties if i
am a villain madam 

she tore my ruffle shrunk from my happy hand with amazing force and
agility as with my other arm i would have encircled her waist 

indeed you are the worst of villains help dear blessed people and
screamed out no help for a poor creature 

am i then a villain madam am i then a villain say you and clasped
both my arms about her offering to raise her to my bounding heart 

oh no and yet you are and again i was her dear lovelace her hands
again clasped over her charming bosom kill me kill me if i am odious
enough in your eyes to deserve this treatment and i will thank you too
long much too long has my life been a burden to me or wildly looking
all round her give me but the means and i will instantly convince you
that my honour is dearer to me than my life 

then with still folded hands and fresh streaming eyes i was her
blessed lovelace and she would thank me with her latest breath if i
would permit her to make that preference or free her from farther
indignities 

i sat suspended for a moment by my soul thought i thou art upon full
proof an angel and no woman still however close clasping her to my
bosom as i raised her from her knees she again slid through my arms 
and dropped upon them see mr lovelace good god that i should live
to see this hour and to bear this treatment see at your feet a poor
creature imploring your pity who for your sake is abandoned of all
the world let not my father's curse thus dreadfully operate be not you
the inflicter who have been the cause of it but spare me i beseech
you spare me for how have i deserved this treatment from you for your
own sake if not for my sake and as you would that god almighty in your
last hour should have mercy upon you spare me 

what heart but must have been penetrated 

i would again have raised the dear suppliant from her knees but she
would not be raised till my softened mind she said had yielded to her
prayer and bid her rise to be innocent 

rise then my angel rise and be what you are and all you wish to be 
only pronounce me pardoned for what has passed and tell me you will
continue to look upon me with that eye of favour and serenity which i
have been blessed with for some days past and i will submit to my
beloved conqueress whose power never was at so great an height with me 
as now and retire to my apartment 

god almighty said she hear your prayers in your most arduous moments 
as you have heard mine and now leave me this moment leave me to my own
recollection in that you will leave me to misery enough and more than
you ought to wish to your bitterest enemy 

impute not every thing my best beloved to design for design it was
not 

o mr lovelace 

upon my soul madam the fire was real  and so it was jack   the
house my dearest life might have been consumed by it as you will be
convinced in the morning by ocular demonstration 

o mr lovelace 

let my passion for you madam and the unexpected meeting of you at your
chamber-door in an attitude so charming 

leave me leave me this moment i beseech you leave me looking wildly
and in confusion about her and upon herself 

excuse me my dearest creature for those liberties which innocent as
they were your too great delicacy may make you take amiss 

no more no more leave me i beseech you again looking upon herself 
and round her in a sweet confusion begone begone 

then weeping she struggled vehemently to withdraw her hands which all
the while i held between mine her struggles o what additional charms 
as i now reflect did her struggles give to every feature every limb of
a person so sweetly elegant and lovely 

impossible my dearest life till you pronounce my pardon say but you
forgive me say but you forgive me 

i beseech you to be gone leave me to myself that i may think what i can
do and what i ought to do 

that my dearest creature is not enough you must tell me that i am
forgiven that you will see me to-morrow as if nothing had happened 

and then i clasped her again in my arms hoping she would not forgive
me 

i will i do forgive you wretch that you are 

nay my clarissa and is it such a reluctant pardon mingled with a word
so upbraiding that i am to be put off with when you are thus clasping
her close to me in my power 

i do i do forgive you 

heartily 

yes heartily 

and freely 

freely 

and will you look upon me to-morrow as if nothing had passed 

yes yes 

i cannot take these peevish affirmatives so much like intentional
negatives say you will upon your honour 

upon my honour then oh now begone begone and never never 

what never my angel is this forgiveness 

never said she let what has passed be remembered more 

i insisted upon one kiss to seal my pardon and retired like a fool a
woman's fool as i was i sneakingly retired couldst thou have
believed it 

but i had no sooner entered my own apartment than reflecting upon the
opportunity i had lost and that all i had gained was but an increase of
my own difficulties and upon the ridicule i should meet with below upon
a weakness so much out of my usual character i repented and hastened
back in hope that through the distress of mind which i left her in she
had not so soon fastened the door and i was fully resolved to execute
all my purposes be the consequence what it would for thought i i have
already sinned beyond cordial forgiveness i doubt and if fits and
desperation ensue i can but marry at last and then i shall make her
amends 

but i was justly punished for her door was fast and hearing her sigh
and sob as if her heart would burst my beloved creature said i 
rapping gently  the sobbings then ceasing   i want but to say three
words to you which must be the most acceptable you ever heard from me 
let me see you out for one moment 

i thought i heard her coming to open the door and my heart leapt in that
hope but it was only to draw another bolt to make it still the faster 
and she either could not or would not answer me but retired to the
farther end of her apartment to her closet probably and more like a
fool than before again i sneaked away 

this was mine my plot and this was all i made of it i love her more
than ever and well i may never saw i polished ivory so beautiful as
her arms and shoulders never touched i velvet so soft as her skin her
virgin bosom o belford she is all perfection then such an elegance 
in her struggling losing her shoe but just slipt on as i told thee 
her pretty foot equally white and delicate as the hand of any other
woman or even her own hand 

but seest thou not that i have a claim of merit for a grace that every
body hitherto had denied me and that is for a capacity of being moved by
prayers and tears where where on this occasion was the callous where
the flint by which my heart was said to be surrounded 

this indeed is the first instance in the like case that ever i was
wrought upon but why because i never before encountered a resistance
so much in earnest a resistance in short so irresistible 

what a triumph has her sex obtained in my thoughts by this trial and
this resistance 

but if she can now forgive me can she must has she not upon her
honour already done it but how will the dear creature keep that part of
her promise which engages her to see me in the morning as if nothing had
happened 

she would give the world i fancy to have the first interview over she
had not best reproach me yet not to reproach me what a charming
puzzle let her break her word with me at her peril fly me she
cannot no appeals lie from my tribunal what friend has she in the
world if my compassion exert not itself in her favour and then the
worthy captain tomlinson and her uncle harlowe will be able to make all
up for me be my next offence what it may 

as to thy apprehensions of her committing any rashness upon herself 
whatever she might have done in her passion if she could have seized
upon her scissors or found any other weapon i dare say there is no fear
of that from her deliberate mind a man has trouble enough with these
truly pious and truly virtuous girls  now i believe there are such   he
had need to have some benefit from some security in the rectitude of
their minds 

in short i fear nothing in this lady but grief yet that's a slow
worker you know and gives time to pop in a little joy between its
sullen fits 



letter xvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
thursday morning eight o'clock 


her chamber-door has not yet been opened i must not expect she will
breakfast with me nor dine with me i doubt a little silly soul what
troubles does she make to herself by her over-niceness all i have done
to her would have been looked upon as a frolic only a romping bout and
laughed off by nine parts in ten of the sex accordingly the more she
makes of it the more painful to herself as well as to me 

why now jack were it not better upon her own notions that she seemed
not so sensible as she will make herself to be if she is very angry 

but perhaps i am more afraid than i need i believe i am from her
over-niceness arises my fear more than from any extraordinary reason for
resentment next time she may count herself very happy if she come off
no worse 

the dear creature was so frightened and so fatigued last night no
wonder she lies it out this morning 

i hope she has had more rest than i have had soft and balmy i hope 
have been her slumbers that she may meet me in tolerable temper all
sweetly blushing and confounded i know how she will look but why
should she the sufferer be ashamed when i the trespasser am not 

but custom is a prodigious thing the women are told how much their
blushes heighten their graces they practise for them therefore blushes
come as hastily when they call for them as their tears aye that's it 
while we men taking blushes for a sign of guilt or sheepishness are
equally studious to suppress them 


 


by my troth jack i am half as much ashamed to see the women below as
my fair-one can be to see me i have not yet opened my door that i may
not be obtruded upon my them 

after all what devils may one make of the sex to what a height of 
what shall i call it must those of it be arrived who once loved a man
with so much distinction as both polly and sally loved me and yet can
have got so much above the pangs of jealousy so much above the
mortifying reflections that arise from dividing and sharing with new
objects the affections of them they prefer to all others as to wish for 
and promote a competitorship in his love and make their supreme delight
consist in reducing others to their level for thou canst not imagine 
how even sally martin rejoiced last night in the thought that the lady's
hour was approaching 


past ten o'clock 

i never longed in my life for any thing with so much impatience as to see
my charmer she has been stirring it seems these two hours 

dorcas just now tapped at her door to take her morning commands 

she had none for her was the answer 

she desired to know if she would not breakfast 

a sullen and low-voiced negative received dorcas 

i will go myself 


 


three different times tapped i at the door but had no answer 

permit me dearest creature to inquire after your health as you have
not been seen to-day i am impatient to know how you do 

not a word of answer but a deep sigh even to sobbing 

let me beg of you madam to accompany me up another pair of stairs 
you'll rejoice to see what a happy escape we have all had 

a happy escape indeed jack for the fire had scorched the window-board 
singed the hangings and burnt through the slit-deal linings of the
window-jambs 

no answer madam am i not worthy of one word is it thus you keep your
promise with me shall i not have the favour of your company for two
minutes  only for two minutes  in the dining-room 

hem and a deep sigh were all the answer 

answer me but how you do answer me but that you are well is this the
forgiveness that was the condition of my obedience 

then with a faintish but angry voice begone from my door wretch 
inhuman barbarous and all that is base and treacherous begone from my
door nor tease thus a poor creature entitled to protection not
outrage 

i see madam how you keep your word with me if a sudden impulse the
effects of an unthought-of accident cannot be forgiven 

o the dreadful weight of a father's curse thus in the very letter of
it 

and then her voice dying away in murmurs inarticulate i looked through
the key-hole and saw her on her knees her face though not towards me 
lifted up as well as hands and these folded depreciating i suppose 
that gloomy tyrant's curse 

i could not help being moved 

my dearest life admit me to your presence but for two minutes and
confirm your promised pardon and may lightning blast me on the spot if
i offer any thing but my penitence at a shrine so sacred i will
afterwards leave you for a whole day till to-morrow morning and then
attend you with writings all ready to sign a license obtained or if it
cannot a minister without one this once believe me when you see the
reality of the danger that gave occasion for this your unhappy
resentment you will think less hardly of me and let me beseech you to
perform a promise on which i made a reliance not altogether ungenerous 

i cannot see you would to heaven i never had if i write that's all i
can do 

let your writing then my dearest life confirm your promise and i will
withdraw in expectation of it 


past eleven o'clock 

she rung her bell for dorcas and with her door in her hand only half
opened gave her a billet for me 

how did the dear creature look dorcas 

she was dressed she turned her face quite from me and sighed as if
her heart would break 

sweet creature i kissed the wet wafer and drew it from the paper with
my breath 

these are the contents no inscriptive sir no mr lovelace 


i cannot see you nor will i if i can help it words cannot express the
anguish of my soul on your baseness and ingratitude 

if the circumstances of things are such that i can have no way for
reconciliation with those who would have been my natural protectors from
such outrages but through you  the only inducement i have to stay a
moment longer in your knowledge   pen and ink must be at present the
only means of communication between us 

vilest of men and most detestable of plotters how have i deserved from
you the shocking indignities but no more only for your own sake wish
not at least for a week to come to see

the undeservedly injured and insulted
clarissa harlowe


 


so thou seest nothing could have stood me in stead but this plot of
tomlinson and her uncle to what a pretty pass nevertheless have i
brought myself had caesar been such a fool he had never passed the
rubicon but after he had passed it had he retreated re infecta 
intimidated by a senatorial edict what a pretty figure would he have
made in history i might have known that to attempt a robbery and put
a person in bodily fear is as punishable as if the robbery had been
actually committed 

but not to see her for a week dear pretty soul how she anticipates me
in every thing the counsellor will have finished the writings to-day or
to-morrow at furthest the license with the parson or the parson
without the license must also be procured within the next four-and-
twenty hours pritchard is as good as ready with his indentures
tripartite tomlinson is at hand with a favourable answer from her uncle
 yet not to see her for a week dear sweet soul her good angel is
gone a journey is truanting at least but nevertheless in thy week's
time or in much less my charmer i doubt not to complete my triumph 

but what vexes me of all things is that such an excellent creature
should break her word fie fie upon her but nobody is absolutely
perfect tis human to err but not to persevere i hope my charmer
cannot be inhuman 



letter xviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
king's arms pall-mall thursday two o'clock 


several billets passed between us before i went out by the
internuncioship of dorcas for which reason mine are superscribed by her
married name she would not open her door to receive them lest i should
be near it i suppose so dorcas was forced to put them under the door
 after copying them for thee and thence to take the answers read
them if thou wilt at this place 


 


to mrs lovelace

indeed my dearest life you carry this matter too far what will the
people below who suppose us one as to the ceremony think of so great a
niceness liberties so innocent the occasion so accidental you will
expose yourself as well as me hitherto they know nothing of what has
passed and what indeed has passed to occasion all this resentment i
am sure you will not by a breach of your word of honour give me reason
to conclude that had i not obeyed you i could have fared no worse 

most sincerely do i repent the offence given to your delicacy but must
i for so accidental an occurrence be branded by such shocking names 
vilest of men and most detestable of plotters are hard words from the
pen of such a lady too 

if you step up another pair of stairs you will be convinced that 
however detestable i may be to you i am no plotter in this affair 

i must insist upon seeing you in order to take your directions upon some
of the subjects we talked of yesterday in the evening 

all that is more than necessary is too much i claim your promised
pardon and wish to plead it on my knees 

i beg your presence in the dining-room for one quarter of an hour and i
will then leave you for the day i am 

my dearest life 
your ever adoring and truly penitent
lovelace 


 


to mr lovelace

i will not see you i cannot see you i have no directions to give you 
let providence decide for me as it pleases 

the more i reflect upon your vileness your ungrateful your barbarous
vileness the more i am exasperated against you 

you are the last person whose judgment i will take upon what is or is not
carried too far in matters of decency 

tis grievous to me to write or even to think of you at present urge
me no more then once more i will not see you nor care i now you
have made me vile to myself what other people think of me 


 


to mrs lovelace

again madam i remind you of your promise and beg leave to say i
insist upon the performance of it 

remember dearest creature that the fault of a blameable person cannot
warrant a fault in one more perfect overniceness may be underniceness 

i cannot reproach myself with any thing that deserves this high
resentment 

i own that the violence of my passion for you might have carried me
beyond fit bounds but that your commands and adjurations had power over
me at such a moment i humbly presume to say deserves some
consideration 

you enjoin me not to see you for a week if i have not your pardon
before captain tomlinson comes to town what shall i say to him 

i beg once more your presence in the dining-room by my soul madam i
must see you 

i want to consult you about the license and other particulars of great
importance the people below think us married and i cannot talk to you
upon such subjects with the door between us 

for heaven's sake favour me with your presence for a few minutes and i
will leave you for the day 

if i am to be forgiven according to your promise the earlier
forgiveness will be most obliging and will save great pain to yourself 
as well as to

your truly contrite and afflicted
lovelace 


 


to mr lovelace

the more you tease me the worse it will be for you 

time is wanted to consider whether i ever should think of you at all 

at present it is my sincere wish that i may never more see your face 

all that can afford you the least shadow of favour from me arises from
the hoped-for reconciliation with my real friends not my judas
protector 

i am careless at present of consequences i hate myself and who is it i
have reason to value not the man who could form a plot to disgrace his
own hopes as well as a poor friendless creature made friendless by
himself by insults not to be thought of with patience 


 


to mrs lovelace

madam 
i will go to the commons and proceed in every particular as if i had not
the misfortune to be under your displeasure 

i must insist upon it that however faulty my passion on so unexpected
an incident made me appear to a lady of your delicacy yet my compliance
with your entreaties at such a moment  as it gave you an instance of your
power over me which few men could have shown  ought duly considered to
entitle me to the effects of that solemn promise which was the condition
of my obedience 

i hope to find you in a kinder and i will say juster disposition on my
return whether i get the license or not let me beg of you to make the
soon you have been pleased to bid me hope for to-morrow morning this
will reconcile every thing and make me the happiest of men 

the settlements are ready to sign or will be by night 

for heaven's sake madam do not carry your resentment into a displeasure
so disproportionate to the offence for that would be to expose us both
to the people below and what is of infinite more consequence to us to
captain tomlinson let us be able i beseech you madam to assure him 
on his next visit that we are one 

as i have no hope to be permitted to dine with you i shall not return
till evening and then i presume to say i expect  your promise
authorizes me to use the word  to find you disposed to bless by your
consent for to-morrow 

your adoring
lovelace 


 


what pleasure did i propose to take how to enjoy the sweet confusion in
which i expected to find her while all was so recent but she must she
shall see me on my return it were better to herself as well as for
me that she had not made so much ado about nothing i must keep my anger
alive lest it sink into compassion love and compassion be the
provocation ever so great are hard to be separated while anger converts
what would be pity without it into resentment nothing can be lovely
in a man's eye with which he is thoroughly displeased 

i ordered dorcas on putting the last billet under the door and finding
it taken up to tell her that i hoped an answer to it before i went out 

her reply was verbal tell him that i care not whither he goes nor what
he does and this re-urged by dorcas was all she had to say to me 

i looked through the key-hole at my going by her door and saw her on her
knees at her bed's feet her head and bosom on the bed her arms
extended  sweet creature how i adore her   and in an agony she seemed to
be sobbing as i heard at that distance as if her heart would break 
by my soul jack i am a pityful fellow recollection is my enemy 
divine excellence happy with her for so many days together now so
unhappy and for what but she is purity herself and why after all 
should i thus torment but i must not trust myself with myself in the
humour i am in 


 


waiting here for mowbray and mallory by whose aid i am to get the
license i took papers out of my pocket to divert myself and thy last
popt officiously the first into my hand i gave it the honour of a
re-perusal and this revived the subject with me with which i had
resolved not to trust myself 

i remember that the dear creature in her torn answer to my proposals 
says condescension is not meanness she better knows how to make this
out than any mortal breathing condescension indeed implies dignity 
and dignity ever was there in her condescension yet such a dignity as
gave grace to the condescension for there was no pride no insult no
apparent superiority indicated by it this miss howe confirms to be a
part of her general character 


 see vol iv letter xxiii 


i can tell her how she might behave to make me her own for ever she
knows she cannot fly me she knows she must see me sooner or later the
sooner the more gracious i would allow her to resent  not because the
liberties i took with her require resentment were she not a clarissa 
but as it becomes her particular niceness to resent  but would she show
more love than abhorrence of me in her resentment would she seem if it
were but to seem to believe the fire no device and all that followed
merely accidental and descend upon it to tender expostulation and
upbraiding for the advantage i would have taken of her surprise and
would she at last be satisfied as well she may that it was attended
with no further consequence and place some generous confidence in my
honour  power loves to be trusted jack   i think i would put an end to
all her trials and pay her my vows at the altar 

yet to have taken such bold steps as with tomlinson and her uncle to
have made such a progress o belford belford how i have puzzled myself 
as well as her this cursed aversion to wedlock how it has entangled
me what contradictions has it made me guilty of 

how pleasing to myself to look back upon the happy days i gave her 
though mine would doubtless have been unmixedly so could i have
determined to lay aside my contrivances and to be as sincere all the
time as she deserved that i should be 

if i find this humour hold but till to-morrow morning  and it has now
lasted two full hours and i seem methinks to have pleasure in
encouraging it   i will make thee a visit i think or get thee to come
to me and then will i consult thee upon it 

but she will not trust me she will not confide in my honour doubt in
this case is defiance she loves me not well enough to forgive me
generously she is so greatly above me how can i forgive her for a
merit so mortifying to my pride she thinks she knows she has told me 
that she is above me these words are still in my ears be gone 
lovelace my soul is above thee man thou hast a proud heart to
contend with my soul is above thee man  miss howe thinks her above
me too thou even thou my friend my intimate friend and companion 
art of the same opinion then i fear her as much as i love her how
shall my pride bear these reflections my wife as i have often said 
because it so often recurs to my thoughts to be so much my superior 
myself to be considered but as the second person in my own family canst
thou teach me to bear such a reflection as this to tell me of my
acquisition in her and that she with all her excellencies will be mine
in full property is a mistake it cannot be so for shall i not be
her's and not my own will not every act of her duty as i cannot
deserve it be a condescension and a triumph over me and must i owe
it merely to her goodness that she does not despise me to have her
condescend to bear with my follies to wound me with an eye of pity a
daughter of the harlowes thus to excel the last and as i have heretofore
said not the meanest of the lovelaces forbid it 


 see vol iv letter xlvii 
 see vol iii letter xviii 


yet forbid it not for do i not now do i not every moment see her
before me all over charms and elegance and purity as in the struggles
of the past midnight and in these struggles heart voice eyes hand 
and sentiments so greatly so gloriously consistent with the character
she has sustained from her cradle to the present hour 

but what advantages do i give thee 

yet have i not always done her justice why then thy teasing
impertinence 

however i forgive thee jack since so much generous love am i capable
of i had rather all the world should condemn me than that her
character should suffer the least impeachment 

the dear creature herself once told me that there was a strange mixture
in my mind i have been called devil and beelzebub between the two
proud beauties i must indeed be a beelzebub if i had not some tolerable
qualities 


 see vol iii letter xxxiii 


but as miss howe says the suffering time of this excellent creature is
her shining time hitherto she has done nothing but shine 


 see vol iv letter xxiii 


she called me villain belford within these few hours and what is the
sum of the present argument but that had i not been a villain in her
sense of the word she had not been such an angel 

o jack jack this midnight attempt has made me mad has utterly undone
me how can the dear creature say i have made her vile in her own eyes 
when her behaviour under such a surprise and her resentment under such
circumstances have so greatly exalted her in mine 

whence however this strange rhapsody is it owing to my being here 
that i am not at sinclair's but if there be infection in that house 
how has my beloved escaped it 

but no more in this strain i will see what her behaviour will be on my
return yet already do i begin to apprehend some little sinkings some
little retrogradations for i have just now a doubt arisen whether for
her own sake i should wish her to forgive me lightly or with
difficulty 


 


i am in a way to come at the wished-for license 

i have now given every thing between my beloved and me a full
consideration and my puzzle is over what has brought me to a speedier
determination is that i think i have found out what she means by the
week's distance at which she intends to hold me it is that she may
have time to write to miss howe to put in motion that cursed scheme of
her's and to take measures upon it which shall enable her to abandon and
renounce me for ever now jack if i obtain not admission to her
presence on my return but am refused with haughtiness if her week be
insisted upon such prospects before her i shall be confirmed in my
conjecture and it will be plain to me that weak at best was that love 
which could give place to punctilio at a time when that all-reconciling
ceremony as she must think waits her command then will i recollect
all her perversenesses then will i re-peruse miss howe's letters and
the transcripts from others of them give way to my aversion to the life
of shackles and then shall she be mine in my own way 

but after all i am in hopes that she will have better considered of
every thing by the evening that her threat of a week's distance was
thrown out in the heat of passion and that she will allow that i have
as much cause to quarrel with her for breach of her word as she has with
me for breach of the peace 

these lines of rowe have got into my head and i shall repeat them very
devoutly all the way the chairman shall poppet me towards her by-and-by 

 teach me some power the happy art of speech 
 to dress my purpose up in gracious words 
 such as may softly steal upon her soul 
 and never waken the tempestuous passions 



letter xix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
thursday evening june 8 


o for a curse to kill with ruined undone outwitted 
tricked zounds man the lady has gone off absolutely gone off 
escaped 

thou knowest not nor canst conceive the pangs that wring my heart 
what can i do o lord o lord o lord 

and thou too who hast endeavoured to weaken my hands wilt but clap thy
dragon's wings at the tidings 

yet i must write or i shall go distracted little less have i been
these two hours dispatching messengers to every stage to every inn to
every waggon or coach whether flying or creeping and to every house
with a bill up for five miles around 

the little hypocrite who knows not a soul in this town  i thought i was
sure of her at any time   such an unexperienced traitress giving me hope
too in her first billet that her expectation of the family-
reconciliation would withhold her from taking such a step as this curse
upon her contrivances i thought that it was owing to her bashfulness 
to her modesty that after a few innocent freedoms she could not look
me in the face when all the while she was impudently  yes i say 
impudently though she be clarissa harlowe  contriving to rob me of the
dearest property i had ever purchased purchased by a painful servitude
of many months fighting through the wild-beasts of her family for her 
and combating with a wind-mill virtue which hath cost me millions of
perjuries only to attempt and which now with its damn'd air-fans has
tost me a mile and a half beyond hope and this just as i had arrived
within view of the consummation of all my wishes 

o devil of love god of love no more how have i deserved this of
thee never before the friend of frozen virtue powerless demon for
powerless thou must be if thou meanedest not to frustrate my hopes who
shall henceforth kneel at thy altars may every enterprising heart
abhor despise execrate renounce thee as i do but o belford 
belford what signifies cursing now 


 


how she could effect this her wicked escape is my astonishment the whole
sisterhood having charge of her for as yet i have not had patience
enough to inquire into the particulars nor to let a soul of them
approach me 

of this i am sure or i had not brought her hither there is not a
creature belonging to this house that could be corrupted either by
virtue or remorse the highest joy every infernal nymph of this worse
than infernal habitation could have known would have been to reduce
this proud beauty to her own level and as to my villain who also had
charge of her he is such a seasoned varlet that he delights in mischief
for the sake of it no bribe could seduce him to betray his trust were
there but wickedness in it tis well however he was out of my way
when the cursed news was imparted to me gone the villain in quest of
her not to return nor to see my face  so it seems he declared  till he
has heard some tidings of her and all the out-of-place varlets of his
numerous acquaintance are summoned and employed in the same business 

to what purpose brought i this angel angel i must yet call her to this
hellish house and was i not meditating to do her deserved honour by
my soul belford i was resolved but thou knowest what i had
conditionally resolved and now who can tell into what hands she may
have fallen 

i am mad stark mad by jupiter at the thoughts of this unprovided 
destitute unacquainted some villain worse than myself who adores her
not as i adore her may have seized her and taken advantage of her
distress let me perish belford if a whole hecatomb of innocents as
the little plagues are called shall atone for the broken promises and
wicked artifices of this cruel creature 


 


going home as i did with resolutions favourable to her judge thou of
my distraction when her escape was first hinted to me although but in
broken sentences i knew not what i said nor what i did i wanted to
kill somebody i flew out of one room into another who broke the matter
to me i charged bribery and corruption in my first fury upon all and
threatened destruction to old and young as they should come in my way 

dorcas continues locked up from me sally and polly have not yet dared to
appear the vile sinclair 

but here comes the odious devil she taps at the door thought that's
only a-jar whining and snuffling to try i suppose to coax me into
temper 


 


what a helpless state where a man can only execrate himself and others 
the occasion of his rage remaining the evil increasing upon reflection 
time itself conspiring to deepen it o how i curs'd her 

i have her now methinks before me blubbering how odious does sorrow
make an ugly face thine jack and this old beldam's in penitentials 
instead of moving compassion must evermore confirm hatred while beauty
in tears is beauty heightened and what my heart has ever delighted to
see 

what excuse confound you and your cursed daughters what excuse can
you make is she not gone has she not escaped but before i am quite
distracted before i commit half a hundred murders let me hear how it
was  


 


i have heard her story art damn'd confounded wicked unpardonable
art is a woman of her character but show me a woman and i'll show thee
a plotter this plaguy sex is art itself every individual of it is a
plotter by nature 

this is the substance of the old wretch's account 

she told me that i had no sooner left the vile house than dorcas
acquainted the syren'  do jack let me call her names i beseech thee 
jack to permit me to call her names   that dorcas acquainted her lady
with it and that i had left word that i was gone to doctors-commons 
and should be heard of for some hours at the horn there if inquired
after by the counsellor or anybody else that afterwards i should be
either at the cocoa-tree or king's-arms and should not return till
late she then urged her to take some refreshment 

she was in tears when dorcas approached her her saucy eyes swelled with
weeping she refused either to eat or drink sighed as if her heart would
break  false devilish grief not the humble silent grief that only
deserves pity contriving to ruin me to despoil me of all that i held
valuable in the very midst of it 

nevertheless being resolved not to see me for a week at least she
ordered her to bring up three or four french rolls with a little butter 
and a decanter of water telling her she would dispense with her
attendance and that should be all she should live upon in the interim 
so artful creature pretending to lay up for a week's siege  for as to
substantial food she no more than other angels angels said i the
devil take me if she be any more an angel for she is odious in my eyes 
and i hate her mortally 

but o lovelace thou liest she is all that is lovely all that is
excellent 

but is she can she be gone oh how miss howe will triumph but if
that little fury receive her fate shall make me rich amends for then
will i contrive to have them both 

i was looking back for connection but the devil take connection i have
no business with it the contrary best befits distraction and that will
soon be my lot 

dorcas consulted the old wretch about obeying her o yes by all means 
for mr lovelace knew how to come at her at any time and directed a
bottle of sherry to be added 

this cheerful compliance so obliged her that she was prevailed upon to
go up and look at the damage done by the fire and seemed not only
shocked by it but as they thought satisfied it was no trick as she
owned she had at first apprehended it to be all this made them secure 
and they laughed in their sleeves to think what a childish way of
showing her resentment she had found out sally throwing out her
witticisms that mrs lovelace was right however not to quarrel with
her bread and butter 

now this very childishness as they imagined it in such a genius would
have made me suspect either her head after what had happened the night
before or her purpose when the marriage was so far as she knew to be
completed within the week in which she was resolved to secrete herself
from me in the same house 

she sent will with a letter to wilson's directed to miss howe 
ordering him to inquire if there were not one for her there 

he only pretended to go and brought word there was none and put her
letter in his pocket for me 

she then ordered him to carry another which she gave him to the horn
tavern to me all this done without any seeming hurry yet she appeared
to be very solemn and put her handkerchief frequently to her eyes 

will pretended to come to me with this letter but thou the dog had
the sagacity to mistrust something on her sending him out a second time 
 and to me whom she had refused to see which he thought extraordinary 
and mentioned his mistrusts to sally polly and dorcas yet they made
light of his suspicions dorcas assuring them all that her lady seemed
more stupid with her grief than active and that she really believed she
was a little turned in her head and knew not what she did but all of
them depended upon her inexperience her open temper and upon her not
making the least motion towards going out or to have a coach or chair
called as sometimes she had done and still more upon the preparations
she had made for a week's siege as i may call it 

will went out pretending to bring the letter to me but quickly
returned his heart still misgiving him on recollecting my frequent
cautions that he was not to judge for himself when he had positive
orders but if any doubt occurred from circumstances i could not
foresee literally to follow them as the only way to avoid blame 

but it must have been in this little interval that she escaped for
soon after his return they made fast the street-door and hatch the
mother and the two nymphs taking a little turn into the garden dorcas
going up stairs and will to avoid being seen by his lady or his voice
heard down into the kitchen 

about half an hour after dorcas who had planted herself where she
could see her lady's door open had the curiosity to go look through the
keyhole having a misgiving as she said that the lady might offer some
violence to herself in the mood she had been in all day and finding the
key in the door which was not very usual she tapped at it three or four
times and having no answer opened it with madam madam did you call 
 supposing her in her closet 

having no answer she stept forward and was astonished to find she was
not there she hastily ran into the dining-room then into my
apartments searched every closet dreading all the time to behold some
sad catastrophe 

not finding her any where she ran down to the old creature and her
nymphs with a have you seen my lady then she's gone she's no where
above 

they were sure she could not be gone out 

the whole house was in an uproar in an instant some running up-stairs 
some down from the upper rooms to the lower and all screaming how
should they look me in the face 

will cried out he was a dead man he blamed them they him and every
one was an accuser and an excuser at the same time 

when they had searched the whole house and every closet in it ten
times over to no purpose they took it into their heads to send to all
the porters chairmen and hackney-coachmen that had been near the house
for two hours past to inquire if any of them saw such a young lady 
describing her 

this brought them some light the only dawning for hope that i can
have and which keeps me from absolute despair one of the chairmen gave
them this account that he saw such a one come out of the house a little
before four in a great hurry and as if frighted with a little parcel
tied up in a handkerchief in her hand that he took notice to his
fellow who plied her without her answering that she was a fine young
lady that he'd warrant she had either a husband or very cross parents 
for that her eyes seemed swelled with crying upon which a third fellow
replied that it might be a doe escaped from mother damnable's park 
this mrs sinclair told me with a curse and a wish that she had a better
reputation so handsomely as she lived and so justly as she paid every
body for what she bought her house visited by the best and civilest of
gentlemen and no noise or brawls ever heard or known in it 

from these appearances the fellow who gave this information had the
curiosity to follow her unperceived she often looked back every body
who passed her turned to look after her passing their verdict upon her
tears her hurry and her charming person till coming to a stand of
coaches a coachman plied her was accepted alighted opened the
coach-door in a hurry seeing her hurry and in it she stumbled for
haste and as the fellow believed hurt her shin with the stumble 

the devil take me belford if my generous heart is not moved for her 
notwithstanding her wicked deceit to think what must be her reflections
and apprehensions at the time a mind so delicate heeding no censures 
yet probably afraid of being laid hold of by a lovelace in every one she
saw at the same time not knowing to what dangers she was about to
expose herself nor of whom she could obtain shelter a stranger to the
town and to all its ways the afternoon far gone but little money and
no clothes but those she had on 

it is impossible in this little interval since last night that miss
howe's townsend could be co-operating 

but how she must abhor me to run all these risques how heartily she must
detest me for my freedoms of last night oh that i had given her
greater reason for a resentment so violent as to her virtue i am too
much enraged to give her the merit due to that to virtue it cannot be
owing that she should fly from the charming prospects that were before
her but to malice hatred contempt harlowe pride the worst of
pride and to all the deadly passions that ever reigned in a female
breast and if i can but recover her but be still be calm be hushed 
my stormy passions for is it not clarissa  harlowe must i say   that
thus far i rave against 

the fellow heard her say drive fast very fast where madam to
holborn-bars answered she repeating drive very fast and up she
pulled both the windows and he lost sight of the coach in a minute 

will as soon as he had this intelligence speeded away in hopes to
trace her out declaring that he would never think of seeing me till he
had heard some tidings of his lady 

and now belford all my hope is that this fellow who attended us in
our airing to hampstead to highgate to muswell-hill to kentish-town 
will hear of her at some one or other of those places and on this i the
rather build as i remember she was once after our return very
inquisitive about the stages and their prices praising the conveniency
to passengers in their going off every hour and this in will s hearing 
who was then in attendance woe be to the villain if he recollect not
this 


 


i have been traversing her room meditating or taking up every thing she
but touched or used the glass she dressed at i was ready to break for
not giving me the personal image it was wont to reflect of her whose
idea is for ever present with me i call for her now in the tenderest 
now in the most reproachful terms as if within hearing wanting her i
want my own soul at least every thing dear to it what a void in my
heart what a chilness in my blood as if its circulation was arrested 
from her room to my own in the dining-room and in and out of every
place where i have seen the beloved of my heart do i hurry in none can
i tarry her lovely image in every one in some lively attitude rushing
cruelly upon me in differently remembered conversations 

but when in my first fury at my return i went up two pairs of stairs 
resolved to find the locked-up dorcas and beheld the vainly-burnt
window-board and recollected my baffled contrivances baffled by my own
weak folly i thought my distraction completed and down i ran as one
frighted at a spectre ready to howl for vexation my head and my temples
shooting with a violence i had never felt before and my back aching as
if the vertebrae were disjointed and falling in pieces 

but now that i have heard the mother's story and contemplated the
dawning hopes given by the chairman's information i am a good deal
easier and can make cooler reflections most heartily pray i for
will s success every four or five minutes if i lose her all my rage
will return with redoubled fury the disgrace to be thus outwitted by a
novice an infant in stratagem and contrivance added to the violence of
my passion for her will either break my heart or what saves many a
heart in evils insupportable turn my brain what had i to do to go out
a license-hunting at least till i had seen her and made up matters with
her and indeed were it not the privilege of a principal to lay all his
own faults upon his underlings and never be to blame himself i should
be apt to reflect that i am more in fault than any body and as the
sting of this reflection will sharpen upon me if i recover her not how
shall i ever be able to bear it 

if ever 


 here mr lovelace lays himself under a curse too shocking to be
repeated if he revenge not himself upon the lady should he once more
get her into his hands  


 


i have just now dismissed the sniveling toad dorcas who was introduced
to me for my pardon by the whining mother i gave her a kind of negative
and ungracious forgiveness yet i shall as violently curse the two
nymphs by-and-by for the consequences of my own folly and if this will
be a good way too to prevent their ridicule upon me for losing so
glorious an opportunity as i had last night or rather this morning 

i have corrected from the result of the inquiries made of the chairman 
and from dorcas's observations before the cruel creature escaped a
description of her dress and am resolved if i cannot otherwise hear of
her to advertise her in the gazette as an eloped wife both by her
maiden and acknowledged name for her elopement will soon be known by
every enemy why then should not my friends be made acquainted with it 
from whose inquiries and informations i may expect some tidings of her 

she had on a brown lustring night-gown fresh and looking like new as
every thing she wears does whether new or not from an elegance natural
to her a beaver hat a black ribbon about her neck and blue knots on
her breast a quilted petticoat of carnation-coloured satin a rose
diamond ring supposed on her finger and in her whole person and
appearance as i shall express it a dignity as well as beauty that
commands the repeated attention of every one who sees her 

the description of her person i shall take a little more pains about my
mind must be more at ease before i undertake that and i shall
threaten that if after a certain period given for her voluntary
return she be not heard of i will prosecute any person who presumes to
entertain harbour abet or encourage her with all the vengeance that
an injured gentleman and husband may be warranted to take by law or
otherwise 


 


fresh cause of aggravation but for this scribbling vein or i should
still run mad 

again going into her chamber because it was her's and sighing over the
bed and every piece of furniture in it i cast my eye towards the
drawers of the dressing-glass and saw peep out as it were in one of
the half-drawn drawers the corner of a letter i snatched it out and
found it superscribed by her to mr lovelace the sight of it made my
heart leap and i trembled so that i could hardly open the seal 

how does this damn'd love unman me but nobody ever loved as i love it
is even increased by her unworthy flight and my disappointment 
ungrateful creature to fly from a passion thus ardently flaming which 
like the palm rises the more for being depressed and slighted 

i will not give thee a copy of this letter i owe her not so much
service 

but wouldst thou think that this haughty promise-breaker could resolve
as she does absolutely and for ever to renounce me for what passed last
night that she could resolve to forego all her opening prospects of
reconciliation the reconciliation with a worthless family on which she
has set her whole heart yet she does she acquits me of all obligation
to her and herself of all expectations from me and for what o that
indeed i had given her real cause damn'd confounded niceness prudery 
affectation or pretty ignorance if not affectation by my soul 
belford i told thee all i was more indebted to her struggles than to
my own forwardness i cannot support my own reflections upon a decency
so ill-requited she could not she would not have been so much a
harlowe in her resentment all she feared had then been over and her
own good sense and even modesty would have taught her to make the best
of it 

but if ever again i get her into my hands art and more art and
compulsion too if she make it necessary  and tis plain that nothing
else will do   shall she experience from the man whose fear of her has
been above even his passion for her and whose gentleness and forbearance
she has thus perfidiously triumphed over well says the poet 

 tis nobler like a lion to invade
 when appetite directs and seize my prey 
 than to wait tamely like a begging dog 
 till dull consent throws out the scraps of love 

thou knowest what i have so lately vowed and yet at times  cruel
creature and ungrateful as cruel   i can subscribe with too much truth
to those lines of another poet 

 she reigns more fully in my soul than ever 
 she garrisons my breast and mans against me
 ev'n my own rebel thoughts with thousand graces 
 ten thousand charms and new-discovered beauties 



letter xx

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


a letter is put into my hands by wilson himself such a letter 

a letter from miss howe to her cruel friend 

i made no scruple to open it 

it is a miracle that i fell not into fits at the reading of it and at
the thought of what might have been the consequence had it come into the
hands of this clarissa harlowe let my justly-excited rage excuse my
irreverence 

collins though not his day brought it this afternoon to wilson's with
a particular desire that it might be sent with all speed to miss
beaumont's lodgings and given if possible into her own hands he had
before been here at mrs sinclair's with intent to deliver it to the
lady with his own hand but was told  too truly told   that she was
abroad but that they would give her any thing he should leave for her
the moment she returned but he cared not to trust them with his
business and went away to wilson's as i find by the description of him
at both places and there left the letter but not till he had a second
time called here and found her not come in 

the letter  which i shall enclose for it is too long to transcribe  will
account to thee for collins's coming hither 

o this devilish miss howe something must be resolved upon and done with
that little fury 


 


thou wilt see the margin of this cursed letter crowded with indices
  i put them to mark the places which call for vengeance upon the
vixen writer or which require animadversion return thou it to me the
moment thou hast perused it 

read it here and avoid trembling for me if thou canst 


to miss laetitia beaumont
wednesday june 7 

my dearest friend 

 you will perhaps think that i have been too
 long silent but i had begun two letters at differ-
 ent times since my last and written a great deal
  each time and with spirit enough i assure you 
 incensed as i was against the abominable wretch you
 are with particularly on reading your's of the 21st
 of the past month 


 see vol iv letter xlvi 


  the first i intended to keep open till i could
 give you some account of my proceedings with mrs 
 townsend it was some days before i saw her 
 and this intervenient space giving me time to re-
 peruse what i had written i thought it proper to lay
  that aside and to write in a style a little less fervent 
  for you would have blamed me i know for the free-
 dom of some of my expressions  execrations if
 you please   and when i had gone a good way
 in the second the change in your prospects on his
 communicating to you miss montague's letter and
 his better behaviour occasioning a change in your
 mind i laid that aside also and in this uncer-
 tainty thought i would wait to see the issue of
 affairs between you before i wrote again believing
 that all would soon be decided one way or other 

 i had still perhaps held this resolution  as every
 appearance according to your letters was more and
 more promising   had not the two passed days fur-
 nished me with intelligence which it highly imports
 you to know 

 but i must stop here and take a little walk to
 try to keep down that just indignation which rises
 to my pen when i am about to relate to you what
 i must communicate 


 

 i am not my own mistress enough then my
 mother always up and down and watching as if
 i were writing to a fellow but i will try if i can
 contain myself in tolerable bounds 

 the women of the house where you are o my
 dear the women of the house but you never
 thought highly of them so it cannot be very sur-
  prising nor would you have staid so long with
 them had not the notion of removing to one of your
 own made you less uneasy and less curious about
 their characters and behaviour yet i could now
 wish that you had been less reserved among them
  but i tease you in short my dear you are
 certainly in a devilish house be assured that the
 woman is one of the vilest women nor does
 she go to you by her right name  very true   
 her name is not sinclair nor is the street she lives
 in dover-street did you never go out by your-
 self and discharge the coach or chair and return
  by another coach or chair if you did  yet i
 don't remember that you ever wrote to me that
 you did   you would never have found your way to
 the vile house either by the woman's name sin-
 clair or by the street's name mentioned by that
 doleman in his letter about the lodgings 


 vol iii letters xxxviii and xxxix 


 the wretch might indeed have held out these
 false lights a little more excusably had the house
 been an honest house and had his end only been
 to prevent mischief from your brother but this
 contrivance was antecedent as i think to your
 brother's project so that no excuse can be made
  for his intentions at the time the man whatever he
 may now intend was certainly then even then a
 villain in his heart 


 


  i am excessively concerned that i should be pre-
 vailed upon between your over-niceness on one
 hand and my mother's positiveness on the other to
 be satisfied without knowing how to direct to you
 at your lodgings i think too that the proposal
 that i should be put off to a third-hand knowledge 
 or rather veiled in a first-hand ignorance came from
 him and that it was only acquiesced in by you as
 it was by me upon needless and weak considera-
 tions because truly i might have it to say if
 challenged that i knew not where to send to you 
 i am ashamed of myself had this been at first
 excusable it could not be a good reason for going
 on in the folly when you had no liking to the
  house and when he began to play tricks and delay
 with you what i was to mistrust myself was
 i i was to allow it to be thought that i could
  not keep my own secret but the house to be
  taken at this time and at that time led us both on
  like fools like tame fools in a string upon my
 life my dear this man is a vile a contemptible
 villain i must speak out how has he laughed
 in his sleeve at us both i warrant for i can't tell
 how long 


 see vol iii letter lvi par 12 and letter lviii par 12 where
the reader will observe that the proposal came from herself which as
it was also mentioned by mr lovelace towards the end of letter i in
vol iv she may be presumed to have forgotten so that clarissa had a
double inducement for acquiescing with the proposed method of carrying on
the correspondence between miss howe and herself by wilson's conveyance 
and by the name of laetitia beaumont 


 and yet who could have thought that a man of
  fortune and some reputation  this doleman i
 mean not your wretch to be sure   formerly a
 rake indeed  i inquired after him long ago and
 so was the easier satisfied   but married to a
 woman of family having had a palsy-blow and 
  one would think a penitent should recommend
 such a house  why my dear he could not inquire
 of it but must find it to be bad  to such a man as
 lovelace to bring his future nay his then supposed 
 bride to 


 


  i write perhaps with too much violence to be
 clear but i cannot help it yet i lay down my
 pen and take it up every ten minutes in order to
 write with some temper my mother too in and
 out what need i she asks me lock myself in 
 if i am only reading past correspondencies for
  that is my pretence when she comes poking in with
 her face sharpened to an edge as i may say by a
 curiosity that gives her more pain than pleasure 
  the lord forgive me but i believe i shall huff
 her next time she comes in 


 


 do you forgive me too my dear my mother
 ought because she says i am my father's girl and
 because i am sure i am her's i don't kow what
 to do i don't know what to write next i have
 so much to write yet have so little patience and so
 little opportunity 

 but i will tell you how i came by my intelli-
  gence that being a fact and requiring the less
 attention i will try to account to you for that 

 thus then it came about miss lardner
 whom you have seen at her cousin biddulph's 
 saw you at st james's church on sunday was fort-
 night she kept you in her eye during the whole
 time but could not once obtain the notice of your's 
 though she courtesied to you twice she thought to
 pay her compliments to you when the service was
 over for she doubted not but you were married 
  and for an odd reason because you came to church
 by yourself every eye as usual wherever you
 are she said was upon you and this seeming to
 give you hurry and you being nearer the door than
 she you slid out before she could get to you but
 she ordered her servant to follow you till you were
 housed this servant saw you step into a chair 
 which waited for you and you ordered the men to
 carry you to the place where they took you up 

 the next day miss lardner sent the same
 servant out of mere curiosity to make private in-
 quiry whether mr lovelace were or were not 
 with you there and this inquiry brought out 
  from different people that the house was suspected
 to be one of those genteel wicked houses which
 receive and accommodate fashionable people of both
 sexes 

 miss lardner confounded at this strange intel-
 ligence made further inquiry enjoining secrecy
 to the servant she had sent as well as to the gentle-
  man whom she employed who had it confirmed
 from a rakish friend who knew the house and
 told him that there were two houses the one in
 which all decent appearances were preserved and guests
 rarely admitted the other the receptacle of those
 who were absolutely engaged and broken to the
 vile yoke 

  say my dear creature say shall i not exe-
 crate the wretch but words are weak what
 can i say that will suitably express my abhorrence
 of such a villain as he must have been when he
 meditated to carry a clarissa to such a place 

 miss lardner kept this to herself some days 
 not knowing what to do for she loves you and
 admires you of all women at last she revealed it 
 but in confidence to miss biddulph by letter 
 miss biddulph in like confidence being afraid it
 would distract me were i to know it communi-
 cated it to miss lloyd and so like a whispered
 scandal it passed through several canals and then
 it came to me which was not till last monday 

 i thought i should have fainted upon the surpris-
 ing communication but rage taking place it blew
 away the sudden illness i besought miss lloyd
 to re-enjoin secrecy to every one i told her that
  i would not for the world that my mother or any
 of your family should know it and i instantly
 caused a trusty friend to make what inquiries he
 could about tomlinson 

  i had thoughts to have done it before i had this
 intelligence but not imagining it to be needful and
 little thinking that you could be in such a house and
 as you were pleased with your changed prospects i
  forbore and the rather forbore as the matter is
 so laid that mrs hodges is supposed to know
 nothing of the projected treaty of accommodation 
 but on the contrary that it was designed to be a
 secret to her and to every body but immediate
 parties and it was mrs hodges that i had pro-
 posed to sound by a second hand 

  now my dear it is certain without applying to
 that too-much-favoured housekeeper that there is
 not such a man within ten miles of your uncle 
 very true one tomkins there is about four miles
 off but he is a day-labourer and one thompson 
 about five miles distant the other way but he is a
 parish schoolmaster poor and about seventy 

  a man thought but of  800 a year cannot come
 from one country to settle in another but every
 body in both must know it and talk of it 

  mrs hodges may yet be sounded at a distance 
 if you will your uncle is an old man old men
 imagine themselves under obligation to their para-
  mours if younger than themselves and seldom
 keep any thing from their knowledge but if we
 suppose him to make secret of this designed treaty 
 it is impossible before that treaty was thought of 
 but she must have seen him at least have heard
 your uncle speak praisefully of a man he is said to
 be so intimate with let him have been ever so little
 a while in those parts 

  yet methinks the story is so plausible tom-
 linson as you describe him is so good a man and
 so much of a gentleman the end to be answered
  by his being an impostor so much more than neces-
 sary if lovelace has villany in his head and as
  you are in such a house your wretch's behaviour
 to him was so petulant and lordly and tomlin-
 son's answer so full of spirit and circumstance 
  and then what he communicated to you of mr 
 hickman's application to your uncle and of mrs 
 norton's to your mother  some of which particu-
  lars i am satisfied his vile agent joseph leman 
 could not reveal to his vile employer   his press-
 ing on the marriage-day in the name of your
 uncle which it could not answer any wicked pur-
  pose for him to do and what he writes of your
 uncle's proposal to have it thought that you were
 married from the time that you have lived in one
 house together and that to be made to agree with
 the time of mr hickman's visit to your uncle 
  the insisting on a trusty person's being present at
 the ceremony at that uncle's nomination these
 things make me willing to try for a tolerable construc-
 tion to be made of all though i am so much
 puzzled by what occurs on both sides of the ques-
  tion that i cannot but abhor the devilish wretch 
 whose inventions and contrivances are for ever em-
 ploying an inquisitive head as mine is without
 affording the means of absolute detection 

 but this is what i am ready to conjecture that
 tomlinson specious as he is is a machine of love-
  lace and that he is employed for some end which
 has not yet been answered this is certain that
 not only tomlinson but mennell who i think 
 attended you more than once at this vile house 
 must know it to be a vile house 

 what can you then think of tomlinson's declar-
 ing himself in favour of it upon inquiry 

 lovelace too must know it to be so if not
 before he brought you to it soon after 

  perhaps the company he found there may be the
 most probable way of accounting for his bearing
 with the house and for his strange suspensions of
 marriage when it was in his power to call such an
 angel of a woman his 

  o my dear the man is a villain the greatest
 of villains in every light i am convinced that he
 is and this doleman must be another of his
 implements 

  there are so many wretches who think that to
 be no sin which is one of the greatest and most
 ungrateful of all sins to ruin young creatures of
 our sex who place their confidence in them that
 the wonder is less than the shame that people of
 appearance at least are found to promote the horrid
 purposes of profligates of fortune and interest 

  but can i think  you will ask with indignant
 astonishment  that lovelace can have designs upon
 your honour 

  that such designs he has had if he still hold
 them or not i can have no doubt now that i know
 the house he has brought you to to be a vile one 
 this is a clue that has led me to account for all his
 behaviour to you ever since you have been in his
 hands 

 allow me a brief retrospection of it all 

 we both know that pride revenge and a delight
 to tread in unbeaten paths are principal ingredients
 in the character of this finished libertine 

  he hates all your family yourself excepted 
 and i have several times thought that i have seen
  him stung and mortified that love has obliged him
 to kneel at your footstool because you are a har-
 lowe yet is this wretch a savage in love love
  that humanizes the fiercest spirits has not been able
 to subdue his his pride and the credit which a
  few plausible qualities sprinkled among his odious
 ones have given him have secured him too good
 a reception from our eye-judging our undistinguish-
 ing our self-flattering our too-confiding sex to
 make assiduity and obsequiousness and a conquest
 of his unruly passions any part of his study 

  he has some reason for his animosity to all the
 men and to one woman of your family he has
 always shown you and his own family too that he
  prefers his pride to his interest he is a declared
 marriage-hater a notorious intriguer full of his
 inventions and glorying in them he never could
 draw you into declarations of love nor till your
  wise relations persecuted you as they did to receive
 his addresses as a lover he knew that you pro-
 fessedly disliked him for his immoralities he could
 not therefore justly blame you for the coldness
 and indifference of your behaviour to him 

  the prevention of mischief was your first main
 view in the correspondence he drew you into he
 ought not then to have wondered that you declared
 your preference of the single life to any matrimonial
 engagement he knew that this was always your
  preference and that before he tricked you away
 so artfully what was his conduct to you
 afterwards that you should of a sudden change
 it 

 thus was your whole behaviour regular con-
 sistent and dutiful to those to whom by birth you
 owed duty and neither prudish coquettish nor
 tyrannical to him 

  he had agreed to go on with you upon those
 your own terms and to rely only on his own merits
 and future reformation for your favour 

  it was plain to me indeed to whom you com-
 municated all that you knew of your own heart 
 though not all of it that i found out that love had
 pretty early gained footing in it and this you
 yourself would have discovered sooner than you
  did had not his alarming his unpolite his rough
 conduct kept it under 

  i knew by experience that love is a fire that is
 not to be played with without burning one's fingers 
 i knew it to be a dangerous thing for two single
 persons of different sexes to enter into familiarity
 and correspondence with each other since as to
 the latter must not a person be capable of premedi-
 tated art who can sit down to write and not write
 from the heart and a woman to write her heart
 to a man practised in deceit or even to a man of
 some character what advantage does it give him
 over her 

  as this man's vanity had made him imagine that
 no woman could be proof against love when his
 address was honourable no wonder that he
 struggled like a lion held in toils against a passion
 that he thought not returned and how could
 you at first show a return in love to so fierce
 a spirit and who had seduced you away by vile
 artifices but to the approval of those artifices 

  hence perhaps it is not difficult to believe that
 it became possible for such a wretch as this to give
 way to his old prejudices against marriage and to
 that revenge which had always been a first passion
 with him 

 this is the only way i think to account for his
 horrid views in bringing you to a vile house 

 and now may not all the rest be naturally
 accounted for his delays his teasing ways 
 his bringing you to bear with his lodging in the
 same house his making you pass to the people of
  it as his wife though restrictively so yet with hope 
 no doubt vilest of villains as he is to take you
  at an advantage his bringing you into the com-
 pany of his libertine companions the attempt of
 imposing upon you that miss partington for a
 bedfellow very probably his own invention for
 the worst of purposes his terrifying you at many
 different times his obtruding himself upon you
 when you went out to church no doubt to prevent
 your finding out what the people of the house were
 the advantages he made of your brother's foolish
 project with singleton 

 see my dear how naturally all this follows from
  the discovery made by miss lardner see how
 the monster whom i thought and so often called 
  a fool comes out to have been all the time one of
 the greatest villains in the world 

 but if this is so what  it would be asked by
 an indifferent person   has hitherto saved you 
 glorious creature what morally speaking but
 your watchfulness what but that and the
 majesty of your virtue the native dignity which 
 in a situation so very difficult friendless destitute 
 passing for a wife cast into the company of crea-
 tures accustomed to betray and ruin innocent hearts 
 has hitherto enabled you to baffle over-awe and
 confound such a dangerous libertine as this so
 habitually remorseless as you have observed him
 to be so very various in his temper so inventive 
 so seconded so supported so instigated too pro-
 bably as he has been that native dignity that
 heroism i will call it which has on all proper
 occasions exerted itself in its full lustre unmingled
  with that charming obligingness and condescending
 sweetness which is evermore the softener of that
 dignity when your mind is free and unapprehen-
 sive 

  let me stop to admire and to bless my beloved
 friend who unhappily for herself at an age so
 tender unacquainted as she was with the world and
 with the vile arts of libertines having been called
 upon to sustain the hardest and most shocking trials 
 from persecuting relations on one hand and from
 a villanous lover on the other has been enabled to
 give such an illustrious example of fortitude and
 prudence as never woman gave before her and
 who as i have heretofore observed has made a
 far greater figure in adversity than she possibly
 could have made had all her shining qualities been
 exerted in their full force and power by the con-
  tinuance of that prosperous run of fortune which
 attended her for eighteen years of life out of
 nineteen 


 see vol iv letters xxiv 


 


  but now my dear do i apprehend that you
 are in greater danger than ever yet you have been
 in if you are not married in a week and yet stay
 in this abominable house for were you out of it 
 i own i should not be much afraid for you 

 these are my thoughts on the most deliberate
  consideration that he is now convinced that
 he has not been able to draw you off your guard 
 that therefore if he can obtain no new advantage
 over you as he goes along he is resolved to do you
 all the poor justice that it is in the power of such a
 wretch as he to do you he is the rather induced to
 this as he sees that all his own family have warmly
 engaged themselves in your cause and that it is
  his highest interest to be just to you then the
 horrid wretch loves you as well he may above all
 women i have no doubt of this with such a love
  as such a wretch is capable of with such a love as
 herod loved his marianne he is now therefore 
 very probably at last in earnest 

 i took time for inquiries of different natures as
 i knew by the train you are in that whatever his
 designs are they cannot ripen either for good or
  evil till something shall result from this device
 of his about tomlinson and your uncle 

 device i have no doubt that it is whatever this
 dark this impenetrable spirit intends by it 

  and yet i find it to be true that counsellor
 williams whom mr hickman knows to be a man
 of eminence in his profession has actually as good
  as finished the settlements that two draughts of
 them have been made one avowedly to be sent to
 one captain tomlinson as the clerk says and i
 find that a license has actually been more than once
 endeavoured to be obtained and that difficulties
 have hitherto been made equally to lovelace's
  vexation and disappointment my mother's proctor 
 who is very intimate with the proctor applied to
 by the wretch has come at this information in
 confidence and hints that as mr lovelace is a
 man of high fortunes these difficulties will probably
 be got over 

 but here follow the causes of my apprehension of
 your danger which i should not have had a thought
  of since nothing very vile has yet been attempted 
 but on finding what a house you are in and on that
 discovery laying together and ruminating on past
 occurrences 

 you are obliged from the present favourable
  appearances to give him your company whenever
 he requests it you are under a necessity of for-
 getting or seeming to forget past disobligations 
 and to receive his addresses as those of a betrothed
 lover you will incur the censure of prudery and
 affectation even perhaps in your own apprehension 
 if you keep him at that distance which has hitherto
  been your security his sudden and as suddenly
 recovered illness has given him an opportunity to
 find out that you love him  alas my dear i
 knew you loved him   he is as you relate every
  hour more and more an encroacher upon it he
 has seemed to change his nature and is all love and
  gentleness the wolf has put on the sheep's cloth-
 ing yet more than once has shown his teeth and
 his hardly-sheathed claws the instance you have
 given of his freedom with your person which you
 could not but resent and yet as matters are
 circumstanced between you could not but pass
 over when tomlinson's letter called you into his
  company show the advantage he has now over
 you and also that if he can obtain greater he
 will and for this very reason as i apprehend it
  is that tomlinson is introduced that is to say to
 give you the greater security and to be a mediator 
 if mortal offence be given you by any villanous
 attempt the day seems not now to be so much
 in your power as it ought to be since that now
 partly depends on your uncle whose presence at
 your own motion he has wished on the occasion 
 a wish were all real very unlikely i think to be
 granted 


 she means the freedom mr lovelace took with her before the fire-plot 
see vol v letter xi when miss howe wrote this letter she could not
know of that 
 see vol v letter xii 


  and thus situated should he offer greater free-
 doms must you not forgive him 

 i fear nothing as i know who has said that
 devil carnate or incarnate can fairly do against a
  virtue so established but surprizes my dear in
 such a house as you are in and in such circum-
 stances as i have mentioned i greatly fear the
  man one who has already triumphed over persons
 worthy of his alliance 

  what then have you to do but to fly this house 
 this infernal house o that your heart would let
 you fly the man 

  if you should be disposed so to do mrs towns-
 end shall be ready at your command but if you
 meet with no impediments no new causes of doubt 
 i think your reputation in the eye of the world 
  though not your happiness is concerned that you
 should be his and yet i cannot bear that these
 libertines should be rewarded for their villany with
 the best of the sex when the worst of it are too
 good for them 

 but if you meet with the least ground for
 suspicion if he would detain you at the odious
 house or wish you to stay now you know what
  the people are fly him whatever your prospects
 are as well as them 

 in one of your next airings if you have no other
  way refuse to return with him name me for your
 intelligencer that you are in a bad house and if you
 think you cannot now break with him seem rather
  to believe that he may not know it to be so and
 that i do not believe he does and yet this belief
 in us both must appear to be very gross 

 but suppose you desire to go out of town for the
 air this sultry weather and insist upon it you
 may plead your health for so doing he dare not
  resist such a plea your brother's foolish scheme 
 i am told is certainly given up so you need not
 be afraid on that account 

 if you do not fly the house upon reading of this 
 or some way or other get out of it i shall judge of
 his power over you by the little you will have over
 either him or yourself 

  one of my informers has made such slight inquiries
 concerning mrs fretchville did he ever name
 to you the street or square she lived in i don't
  remember that you in any of your's mentioned the
 place of her abode to me strange very strange 
 this i think no such person or house can be
 found near any of the new streets or squares where
 the lights i had from your letters led me to imagine
  her house might be ask him what street the
 house is in if he has not told you and let me
  know if he make a difficulty of that circumstance 
 it will amount to a detection and yet i think 
 you will have enough without this 

 i shall send this long letter by collins who
 changes his day to oblige me and that he may try
 now i know where you are to get it into your
 own hands if he cannot he will leave it at
 wilson's as none of our letters by that convey-
 ance have miscarried when you have been in more
 apparently disagreeable situations than you are in at
 present i hope that this will go safe if collins
 should be obliged to leave it there 

  i wrote a short letter to you in my first agitations 
 it contained not above twenty lines all full of fright 
 alarm and execration but being afraid that my
 vehemence would too much affect you i thought it
 better to wait a little as well for the reasons already
 hinted at as to be able to give you as many par-
 ticulars as i could and my thoughts upon all and
 as they have offered or may offer you will be
 sufficiently armed to resist all his machinations be
 what they will 

  one word more command me up if i can be
 of the least service or pleasure to you i value
 not fame i value not censure nor even life itself 
 i verily think as i do your honour and your friend-
 ship for is not your honour my honour and
 is not your friendship the pride of my life 

 may heaven preserve you my dearest creature 
 in honour and safety is the prayer the hourly
 prayer of

your ever-faithful and affectionate
anna howe 

thursday morn 5 i have
 written all night


 


to miss howe

my dearest creature 

how you have shocked confounded surprised astonished me by your
dreadful communication my heart is too weak to bear up against such a
stroke as this when all hope was with me when my prospects were so
much mended but can there be such villany in men as in this vile
principal and equally vile agent 

i am really ill very ill grief and surprise and now i will say 
despair have overcome me all all you have laid down as conjecture 
appears to me now to be more than conjecture 

o that your mother would have the goodness to permit me the presence of
the only comforter that my afflicted my half-broken heart could be
raised by but i charge you think not of coming up without her
indulgent permission i am too ill at present my dear to think of
combating with this dreadful man and of flying from this horrid house 
my bad writing will show you this but my illness will be my present
security should he indeed have meditated villany forgive o forgive
me my dearest friend the trouble i have given you all must soon but
why add i grief to grief and trouble to trouble but i charge you my
beloved creature not to think of coming up without your mother's love 
to the truly desolate and broken-spirited

clarissa harlowe 


 


well jack and what thinkest thou of this last letter miss howe
values not either fame or censure and thinkest thou that this letter
will not bring the little fury up though she could procure no other
conveyance than her higgler's panniers one for herself the other for
her maid she knows whither to come now many a little villain have i
punished for knowing more than i would have her know and that by adding
to her knowledge and experience what thinkest thou belford if by
getting hither this virago and giving cause for a lamentable letter from
her to the fair fugitive i should be able to recover her would she not
visit that friend in her distress thinkest thou whose intended visit to
her in her's brought her into the condition from which she herself had so
perfidiously escaped 

let me enjoy the thought 

shall i send this letter thou seest i have left room if i fail in the
exact imitation of so charming a hand to avoid too strict a scrutiny 
do they not both deserve it of me seest thou now how the raving girl
threatens her mother ought she not to be punished and can i be a
worse devil or villain or monster that she calls me in the long letter
i enclose and has called me in her former letters were i to punish them
both as my vengeance urges me to punish them and when i have executed
that my vengeance how charmingly satisfied may they both go down into
the country and keep house together and have a much better reason than
their pride could give them for living the single life they have both
seemed so fond of 

i will set about transcribing it this moment i think i can resolve
afterwards yet what has poor hickman done to deserve this of me but
gloriously would it punish the mother as well as daughter for all her
sordid avarice and for her undutifulness to honest mr howe whose heart
she actually broke i am on tiptoe jack to enter upon this project 
is not one country as good to me as another if i should be obliged to
take another tour upon it 


 


but i will not venture hickman is a good man they tell me i love a
good man i hope one of these days to be a good man myself besides i
have heard within this week something of this honest fellow that shows he
has a soul when i thought if he had one that it lay a little of the
deepest to emerge to notice except on very extraordinary occasions and
that then it presently sunk again into its cellula adiposa the man is a
plump man didst ever see him jack 

but the principal reason that withholds me  for tis a tempting project  
is for fear of being utterly blown up if i should not be quick enough
with my letter or if miss howe should deliberate on setting out to try
her mother's consent first in which time a letter from my frighted
beauty might reach her for i have no doubt wherever she has refuged 
but her first work was to write to her vixen friend i will therefore go
on patiently and take my revenge upon the little fury at my leisure 

but in spite of my compassion for hickman whose better character is
sometimes my envy and who is one of those mortals that bring clumsiness
into credit with the mothers to the disgrace of us clever fellows and
often to our disappointment with the daughters and who has been very
busy in assisting these double-armed beauties against me i swear by all
the dii majores as well as minores that i will have miss howe if i
cannot have her more exalted friend and then if there be as much
flaming love between these girls as they pretend will my charmer profit
by her escape 

and now that i shall permit miss howe to reign a little longer let me
ask thee if thou hast not in the enclosed letter a fresh instance 
that a great many of my difficulties with her sister-toast are owing to
this flighty girl tis true that here was naturally a confounded sharp
winter air and if a little cold water was thrown into the path no
wonder that it was instantly frozen and that the poor honest traveller
found it next to impossible to keep his way one foot sliding back as
fast as the other advanced to the endangering of his limbs or neck but
yet i think it impossible that she should have baffled me as she has done
 novice as she is and never before from under her parents' wings had
she not been armed by a virago who was formerly very near showing that
she could better advise than practise but this i believe i have said
more than once before 

i am loth to reproach myself now the cruel creature has escaped me for
what would that do but add to my torment since evils self-caused and
avoidable admit not of palliation or comfort and yet if thou tellest
me that all her strength was owing to my weakness and that i have been
a cursed coward in this whole affair why then jack i may blush and
be vexed but by my soul i cannot contradict thee 

but this belford i hope that if i can turn the poison of the enclosed
letter into wholesome ailment that is to say if i can make use of it to
my advantage i shall have thy free consent to do it 

i am always careful to open covers cautiously and to preserve seals
entire i will draw out from this cursed letter an alphabet nor was
nick rowe ever half so diligent to learn spanish at the quixote
recommendation of a certain peer as i will be to gain the mastery of
this vixen's hand 



letter xxi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
thursday evening june 8 


after my last so full of other hopes the contents of this will surprise
you o my dearest friend the man has at last proved himself to be a
villain 

it was with the utmost difficulty last night that i preserved myself from
the vilest dishonour he extorted from me a promise of forgiveness 
and that i would see him next day as if nothing had happened but if it
were possible to escape from a wretch who as i have too much reason to
believe formed a plot to fire the house to frighten me almost naked 
into his arms how could i see him next day 

i have escaped heaven be praised that i have and now have no other
concern than that i fly from the only hope that could have made such a
husband tolerable to me the reconciliation with my friends so agreeably
undertaken by my uncle 

all my present hope is to find some reputable family or person of my
own sex who is obliged to go beyond sea or who lives abroad i care not
whether but if i might choose in some one of our american colonies 
never to be heard of more by my relations whom i have so grievously
offended 

nor let your generous heart be moved at what i write if i can escape
the dreadfullest part of my father's malediction for the temporary part
is already in a manner fulfilled which makes me tremble in
apprehension of the other i shall think the wreck of my worldly
fortunes a happy composition 

neither is there need of the renewal of your so-often-tendered goodness
to me for i have with me rings and other valuables that were sent me
with my clothes which will turn into money to answer all i can want 
till providence shall be pleased to put me into some want to help myself 
if for my further punishment my life is to be lengthened beyond my
wishes 

impute not this scheme my beloved friend either to dejection on one
hand or to that romantic turn on the other which we have supposed
generally to obtain with our sex from fifteen to twenty-two for be
pleased to consider my unhappy situation in the light in which it really
must appear to every considerate person who knows it in the first
place the man who has endeavoured to make me his property will hunt
me as a stray and he knows he may do so with impunity for whom have i
to protect me from him 

then as to my estate the envied estate which has been the original
cause of all my misfortunes it shall never be mine upon litigated terms 
what is there in being enabled to boast that i am worth more than i can
use or wish to use and if my power is circumscribed i shall not have
that to answer for which i should have if i did not use it as i ought 
which very few do i shall have no husband of whose interest i ought to
be so regardful as to prevent me doing more than justice to others that
i may not do less for him if therefore my father will be pleased as i
shall presume in proper time to propose to him to pay two annuities
out of it one to my dear mrs norton which may make her easy for the
remainder of her life as she is now growing into years the other of
50 per annum to the same good woman for the use of my poor as i had
the vanity to call a certain set of people concerning whom she knows all
my mind that so as few as possible may suffer by the consequences of my
error god bless them and give them heart's ease and content with the
rest 

other reasons for my taking the step i have hinted at are these 

this wicked man knows i have no friend in the world but you your
neighbourhood therefore would be the first he would seek for me in were
you to think it possible for me to be concealed in it and in this case
you might be subjected to inconveniencies greater even than those which
you have already sustained on my account 

from my cousin morden were he to come i could not hope protection 
since by his letter to me it is evident that my brother has engaged him
in his party nor would i by any means subject so worthy a man to
danger as might be the case from the violence of this ungovernable
spirit 

these things considered what better method can i take than to go abroad
to some one of the english colonies where nobody but yourself shall know
any thing of me nor you let me tell you presently nor till i am
fixed and if it please god in a course of living tolerably to my mind 
for it is no small part of my concern that my indiscretions have laid so
heavy a tax upon you my dear friend to whom once i hoped to give more
pleasure than pain 

i am at present at one mrs moore's at hampstead my heart misgave me at
coming to this village because i had been here with him more than once 
but the coach hither was so ready a conveniency that i knew not what to
do better then i shall stay here no longer than till i can receive your
answer to this in which you will be pleased to let me know if i cannot
be hid according to your former contrivance  happy had i given into it
at the time   by mrs townsend's assistance till the heat of his search
be over the deptford road i imagine will be the right direction to
hear of a passage and to get safely aboard 

o why was the great fiend of all unchained and permitted to assume so
specious a form and yet allowed to conceal his feet and his talons till
with the one he was ready to trample upon my honour and to strike the
other into my heart and what had i done that he should be let loose
particularly upon me 

forgive me this murmuring question the effect of my impatience my
guilty impatience i doubt for as i have escaped with my honour and
nothing but my worldly prospects and my pride my ambition and my
vanity have suffered in this wretch of my hopefuller fortunes may i not
still be more happy than i deserve to be and is it not in my own power
still by the divine favour to secure the greatest stake of all and
who knows but that this very path into which my inconsideration has
thrown me strewed as it is with briers and thorns which tear in pieces
my gaudier trappings may not be the right path to lead me into the great
road to my future happiness which might have been endangered by evil
communication 

and after all are there not still more deserving persons than i who
never failed in any capital point of duty than have been more humbled
than myself and some too by the errors of parents and relations by the
tricks and baseness of guardians and trustees and in which their own
rashness or folly had no part 

i will then endeavour to make the best of my present lot and join with
me my best my only friend in praying that my punishment may end here 
and that my present afflictions may be sanctified to me 

this letter will enable you to account for a line or two which i sent to
wilson's to be carried to you only for a feint to get his servant out
of the way he seemed to be left as i thought for a spy upon me but
he returning too soon i was forced to write a few lines for him to carry
to his master to a tavern near doctors commons with the same view and
this happily answered my end 

i wrote early in the morning a bitter letter to the wretch which i left
for him obvious enough and i suppose he has it by this time i kept no
copy of it i shall recollect the contents and give you the particulars
of all at more leisure 

i am sure you will approve of my escape the rather as the people of the
house must be very vile for they and that dorcas too did hear me i
know they did cry out for help if the fire had been other than a
villanous plot although in the morning to blind them i pretended to
think it otherwise they would have been alarmed as much as i and have
run in hearing me scream to comfort me supposing my terror was the
fire to relieve me supposing it was any thing else but the vile
dorcas went away as soon as she saw the wretch throw his arms about me 
bless me my dear i had only my slippers and an under-petticoat on i
was frighted out of my bed by her cries of fire and that i should be
burnt to ashes in a moment and she to go away and never to return nor
any body else and yet i heard women's voices in the next room indeed
i did an evident contrivance of them all god be praised i am out of
their house 

my terror is not yet over i can hardly think myself safe every well-
dressed man i see from my windows whether on horseback or on foot i
think to be him 

i know you will expedite an answer a man and horse will be procured me
to-morrow early to carry this to be sure you cannot return an answer
by the same man because you must see mrs townsend first nevertheless 
i shall wait with impatience till you can having no friend but you to
apply to and being such a stranger to this part of the world that i
know not which way to turn myself whither to go nor what to do what a
dreadful hand have i made of it 

mrs moore at whose house i am is a widow and of good character and
of this one of her neighbours of whom i bought a handkerchief purposely
to make inquiry before i would venture informed me 

i will not set my foot out of doors till i have your direction and i am
the more secure having dropt words to the people of the house where the
coach set me down as if i expected a chariot to meet me in my way to
hendon a village a little distance from this and when i left their
house i walked backward and forward upon the hill at first not knowing
what to do and afterwards to be certain that i was not watched before i
ventured to inquire after a lodging 

you will direct for me my dear by the name of mrs harriot lucas 

had i not made my escape when i did i was resolved to attempt it again
and again he was gone to the commons for a license as he wrote me
word for i refused to see him notwithstanding the promise he extorted
from me 

how hard how next to impossible my dear to avoid many lesser
deviations when we are betrayed into a capital one 

for fear i should not get away at my first effort i had apprized him 
that i would not set eye upon him under a week in order to gain myself
time for it in different ways and were i so to have been watched as to
have made it necessary i would after such an instance of the connivance
of the women of the house have run out into the street and thrown
myself into the next house i could have entered or claim protection from
the first person i had met women to desert the cause of a poor creature
of their own sex in such a situation what must they be then such
poor guilty sort of figures did they make in the morning after he was
gone out so earnest to get me up stairs and to convince me by the
scorched window-boards and burnt curtains and vallens that the fire was
real that although i seemed to believe all they would have me believe 
i was more and more resolved to get out of their house at all adventures 

when i began i thought to write but a few lines but be my subject
what it will i know not how to conclude when i write to you it was
always so it is not therefore owing peculiarly to that most interesting
and unhappy situation which you will allow however to engross at
present the whole mind of

your unhappy but ever-affectionate
clarissa harlowe 


letter xxii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
friday morning past two o'clock 


io triumphe io clarissa sing once more what a happy man thy
friend a silly dear novice to be heard to tell the coachman where to
carry her and to go to hampstead of all the villages about london 
the place where we had been together more than once 

methinks i am sorry she managed no better i shall find the recovery of
her too easy a task i fear had she but known how much difficulty
enhances the value of any thing with me and had she the least notion of
obliging me by it she would never have stopt short at hampstead surely 

well but after al this exultation thou wilt ask if i have already got
back my charmer i have not but knowing where she is is almost the
same thing as having her in my power and it delights me to think how
she will start and tremble when i first pop upon her how she will look
with conscious guilt that will more than wipe off my guilt of wednesday
night when she sees her injured lover and acknowledged husband from
whom the greatest of felonies she would have stolen herself 

but thou wilt be impatient to know how i came by my lights read the
enclosed letter as i have told thee i have given my fellow in
apprehension of such an elopement and that will tell thee all and what
i may reasonably expect from the rascal's diligence and management if he
wishes ever to see my face again 

i received it about half an hour ago just as i was going to lie down in
my clothes and it has made me so much alive that midnight as it is i
have sent for a blunt's chariot to attend me here by day peep with my
usual coachman if possible and knowing not what else to do with myself 
i sat down and in the joy of my heart have not only written thus far 
but have concluded upon the measures i shall take when admitted to her
presence for well am i aware of the difficulties i shall have to contend
with from her perverseness 


honnered sir 

this is to sertifie your honner as how i am heer at hamestet where i
have found out my lady to be in logins at one mrs moore's near upon
hamestet-hethe and i have so ordered matters that her ladyship cannot
stur but i must have notice of her goins and comins as i knowed i durst
not look into your honner's fase if i had not found out my lady thoff
she was gone off the prems's in a quarter of an hour as a man may say 
so i knowed you would be glad at hart to know i have found her out and
so i send thiss petur patrick who is to have 5 shillings it being now
near 12 of the clock at nite for he would not stur without a hearty
drink too besides and i was willing all shulde be snug likeways at the
logins before i sent 

i have munny of youre honner's but i thought as how if the man was
payed by me beforend he mought play trix so left that to your honner 

my lady knows nothing of my being hereaway but i thoute it best not to
leve the plase because she has taken the logins but for a fue nites 

if your honner come to the upper flax i will be in site all the day
about the tapp-house or the hethe i have borrowed another cote instead
of your honner's liferie and a blacke wigg so cannot be knoen by my
lady iff as howe she shuld see me and have made as if i had the tooth-
ake so with my hancriffe at my mothe the teth which your honner was
pleased to bett out with your honner's fyste and my dam'd wide mothe as
your honner notifys it to be cannot be knoen to be mine 

the two inner letters i had from my lady before she went off the prems's 
one was to be left at mr wilson's for miss howe the next was
to be for your honner but i knowed you was not at the plase directed 
and being afear'd of what fell out so i kept them for your honner and
so could not give um to you until i seed you miss how's i only made
belief to her ladyship as i carried it and sed as how there was nothing
left for hur as she wished to knoe so here they be bothe 

i am may it please your honner 
your honner's must dutiful 
and wonce more happy servant 
wm summers 


 


the two inner letters as will calls them tis plain were written for
no other purpose but to send him out of the way with them and one of
them to amuse me that directed to miss howe is only this 


thursday june 8 

i write this my dear miss howe only for a feint and to see if it will
go current i shall write at large very soon if not miserably
prevented 

cl h 


 


now jack will not her feints justify mine does she not invade my
province thinkest thou and is it not now fairly come to who shall
most deceive and cheat the other so i thank my stars we are upon a
par at last as to this point which is a great ease to my conscience 
thou must believe and if what hudibras tells us is true the dear
fugitive has also abundance of pleasure to come 

 doubtless the pleasure is as great
 in being cheated as to cheat 
 as lookers-on find most delight 
 who least perceive the juggler's sleight 
 and still the less they understand 
 the more admire the slight of hand 


 


this my dear juggler's letter to me the other inner letter sent by will 


thursday june 8 

mr lovelace 

do not give me cause to dread your return if you would not that i
should hate you for ever send me half a line by the bearer to assure me
that you will not attempt to see me for a week to come i cannot look
you in the face without equal confusion and indignation the obliging me
in this is but a poor atonement for your last night's vile behaviour 

you may pass this time in a journey to lord m s and i cannot doubt if
the ladies of your family are as favourable to me as you have assured me
they are but that you will have interest enough to prevail with one of
them to oblige me with their company after your baseness of last night 
you will not wonder that i insist upon this proof of your future honour 

if captain tomlinson comes mean time i can hear what he has to say and
send you an account of it 

but in less than a week if you see me it must be owing to a fresh act of
violence of which you know not the consequence 

send me the requested line if ever you expect to have the forgiveness
confirmed the promise of which you extorted from

the unhappy
cl h 


 


now belford what canst thou say in behalf of this sweet rogue of a
lady what canst thou say for her tis apparent that she was fully
determined upon an elopement when she wrote it and thus would she make
me of party against myself by drawing me in to give her a week's time to
complete it and more wicked still send me upon a fool's errand to
bring up one of my cousins when we came to have the satisfaction of
finding her gone off and me exposed for ever what punishment can be
bad enough for such a little villain of a lady 

but mind moreover how plausibly she accounts by this billet supposing
she should not find an opportunity of eloping before i returned for the
resolution of not seeing me for a week and for the bread and butter
expedient so childish as we thought it 

the chariot is not come and if it were it is yet too soon for every
thing but my impatience and as i have already taken all my measures 
and can think of nothing but my triumph i will resume her violent
letter in order to strengthen my resolutions against her i was before
in too gloomy a way to proceed with it but now the subject is all alive
to me and my gayer fancy like the sunbeams will irradiate it and turn
the solemn deep-green into a brighter verdure 

when i have called upon my charmer to explain some parts of her letter 
and to atone for others i will send it or a copy of it to thee 

suffice it at present to tell thee in the first place that she is
determined never to be my wife to be sure there ought to be no
compulsion in so material a case compulsion was her parents' fault 
which i have censured so severely that i shall hardly be guilty of the
same i am therefore glad i know her mind as to this essential point 

i have ruined her she says now that's a fib take it her own way if i
had she would not perhaps have run away from me 

she is thrown upon the wide world now i own that hampstead-heath
affords very pretty and very extensive prospects but tis not the wide
world neither and suppose that to be her grievance i hope soon to
restore her to a narrower 

i am the enemy of her soul as well as of her honour confoundedly
severe nevertheless another fib for i love her soul very well but
think no more of it in this case than of my own 

she is to be thrown upon strangers and is not that her own fault much
against my will i am sure 

she is cast from a state of independency into one of obligation she
never was in a state of independency nor is it fit a woman should of
any age or in any state of life and as to the state of obligation 
there is no such thing as living without being beholden to somebody 
mutual obligation is the very essence and soul of the social and
commercial life why should she be exempt from it i am sure the person
she raves at desires not such an exemption has been long dependent upon
her and would rejoice to owe further obligations to her than he can
boast of hitherto 

she talks of her father's curse but have i not repaid him for it an
hundred fold in the same coin but why must the faults of other people
be laid at my door have i not enow of my own 

but the grey-eyed dawn begins to peep let me sum up all 

in short then the dear creature's letter is a collection of invectives
not very new to me though the occasion for them no doubt is new to her 
a little sprinkling of the romantic and contradictory runs through it 
she loves and she hates she encourages me to pursue her by telling me
i safely may and yet she begs i will not she apprehends poverty and
want yet resolves to give away her estate to gratify whom why in
short those who have been the cause of her misfortunes and finally 
though she resolves never to be mine yet she has some regrets at leaving
me because of the opening prospects of a reconciliation with her
friends 

but never did morning dawn so tardily as this neither is the chariot
yet come 


 


a gentleman to speak with me dorcas who can want me thus early 

captain tomlinson sayest thou surely he must have traveled all night 
early riser as i am how could he think to find me up thus early 

let but the chariot come and he shall accompany me in it to the bottom
of the hill though he return to town on foot for the captain is all
obliging goodness that i may hear all he has to say and tell him all
my mind and lose no time 

well now i am satisfied that this rebellious flight will turn to my
advantage as all crushed rebellions do to the advantage of a sovereign
in possession 


 


dear captain i rejoice to see you just in the nick of time see see 

 the rosy-finger'd morn appears 
 and from her mantle shakes her tears 
 the sun arising mortals cheers 
 and drives the rising mists away 
 in promise of a glorious day 

excuse me sir that i salute you from my favourite bard he that rises
with the lark will sing with the lark strange news since i saw you 
captain poor mistaken lady but you have too much goodness i know to
reveal to her uncle harlowe the error of this capricious beauty it will
all turn out for the best you must accompany me part of the way i
know the delight you take in composing differences but tis the task of
the prudent to heal the breaches made by the rashness and folly of the
imprudent 


 


and now all around me so still and so silent the rattling of the
chariot-wheels at a street's distance do i hear and to this angel of a
woman i fly 

reward o god of love  the cause is thy own   reward thou as it
deserves my suffering perseverance succeed my endeavours to bring back
to thy obedience this charming fugitive make her acknowledge her
rashness repent her insults implore my forgiveness beg to be
reinstated in my favour and that i will bury in oblivion the remembrance
of her heinous offence against thee and against me thy faithful votary 


 


the chariot at the door i come i come 

i attend you good captain 

indeed sir 

pray sir civility is not ceremony 


and now dressed as a bridegroom my heart elated beyond that of the most
desiring one attended by a footman whom my beloved never saw i am
already at hampstead 



letter xxiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
upper-flask hampstead 
fri morn 7 o'clock june 9 


i am now here and here have been this hour and half what an
industrious spirit have i nobody can say that i eat the bread of
idleness i take true pains for all the pleasure i enjoy i cannot
but admire myself strangely for certainly with this active soul i
should have made a very great figure in whatever station i had filled 
but had i been a prince to be sure i should have made a most noble
prince i should have led up a military dance equal to that of the great
macedonian i should have added kingdom to kingdom and despoiled all
my neighbour sovereigns in order to have obtained the name of robert the
great and i would have gone to war with the great turk and the
persian and mogul for the seraglios for not one of those eastern
monarchs should have had a pretty woman to bless himself with till i had
done with her 

and now i have so much leisure upon my hands that after having informed
myself of all necessary particulars i am set to my short-hand writing in
order to keep up with time as well as i can for the subject is now
become worthy of me and it is yet too soon i doubt to pay my
compliments to my charmer after all her fatigues for two or three days
past and moreover i have abundance of matters preparative to my
future proceedings to recount in order to connect and render all
intelligible 

i parted with the captain at the foot of the hill trebly instructed 
that is to say as to the fact to the probable and to the possible if
my beloved and i can meet and make up without the mediating of this
worthy gentleman it will be so much the better as little foreign aid
as possible in my amorous conflicts has always been a rule with me 
though here i have been obliged to call in so much and who knows but it
may be the better for the lady the less she makes necessary i cannot
bear that she should sit so indifferent to me as to be in earnest to part
with me for ever upon so slight or even upon any occasion if i find
she is but no more threatenings till she is in my power thou knowest
what i have vowed 

all will s account from the lady's flight to his finding her again all
the accounts of the people of the house the coachman's information to
will and so forth collected together stand thus 

the hampstead coach when the dear fugitive came to it had but two
passengers in it but she made the fellow to go off directly paying for
the vacant places 

the two passengers directing the coachman to set them down at the upper
flask she bid him set her down there also 

they took leave of her  very respectfully no doubt   and she went into
the house and asked if she could not have a dish of tea and a room to
herself for half an hour 

they showed her up to the very room where i now am she sat at the very
table i now write upon and i believe the chair i sit in was her's  o
belford if thou knowest what love is thou wilt be able to account for
these minutiae 

she seemed spiritless and fatigued the gentlewoman herself chose to
attend so genteel and lovely a guest she asked her if she would have
bread and butter with her tea 

no she could not eat 

they had very good biscuits 

as she pleased 

the gentlewoman stept out for some and returning on a sudden she
observed the sweet little fugitive endeavouring to restrain a violent
burst of grief to which she had given way in the little interval 

however when the tea came she made the landlady sit down with her 
and asked her abundance of questions about the villages and roads in
the neighbourhood 

the gentlewoman took notice to her that she seemed to be troubled in
mind 

tender spirits she replied could not part with dear friends without
concern 

she meant me no doubt 

she made no inquiry about a lodging though by the sequel thou'lt
observe that she seemed to intend to go no farther that night than
hampstead but after she had drank two dishes and put a biscuit in
her pocket  sweet soul to serve for her supper perhaps   she laid
down half-a-crown and refusing change sighing took leave saying she
would proceed towards hendon the distance to which had been one of her
questions 

they offered to send to know if a hampstead coach were not to go to
hendon that evening 

no matter she said perhaps she might meet the chariot 

another of her feints i suppose for how or with whom could any thing
of this sort have been concerted since yesterday morning 

she had as the people took notice to one another something so
uncommonly noble in her air and in her person and behaviour that they
were sure she was of quality and having no servant with her of either
sex her eyes  her fine eyes the gentlewoman called them stranger as
she was and a woman   being swelled and red they were sure there was an
elopement in the case either from parents or guardians for they
supposed her too young and too maidenly to be a married lady and were
she married no husband would let such a fine young creature to be
unattended and alone nor give her cause for so much grief as seemed to
be settled in her countenance then at times she seemed to be so
bewildered they said that they were afraid she had it in her head to
make away with herself 

all these things put together excited their curiosity and they engaged
a peery servant as they called a footman who was drinking with kit the
hostler at the tap-house to watch all her motions this fellow
reported the following particulars as they re-reported to me 

she indeed went towards hendon passing by the sign of the castle on the
heath then stopping looked about her and down into the valley before
her then turning her face towards london she seemed by the motion of
her handkerchief to her eyes to weep repenting  who knows   the rash
step she had taken and wishing herself back again 

better for her if she do jack once more i say woe be to the girl who
could think of marrying me yet to be able to run away from me and
renounce me for ever 

then continuing on a few paces she stopt again and as if disliking
her road again seeming to weep directed her course back towards
hampstead 

i am glad she wept so much because no heart bursts be the occasion for
the sorrow what it will which has that kindly relief hence i hardly
ever am moved at the sight of these pellucid fugitives in a fine woman 
how often in the past twelve hours have i wished that i could cry most
confoundedly 

she then saw a coach-and-four driving towards her empty she crossed
the path she was in as if to meet it and seemed to intend to speak to
the coachman had he stopt or spoken first he as earnestly looked at
her every one did so who passed her so the man who dogged her was the
less suspected  happy rogue of a coachman hadst thou known whose
notice thou didst engage and whom thou mightest have obliged it was
the divine clarissa harlowe at whom thou gazest mine own clarissa
harlowe but it was well for me that thou wert as undistinguishing as
the beasts thou drovest otherwise what a wild-goose chace had i been
led 

the lady as well as the coachman in short seemed to want resolution 
 the horses kept on  the fellow's head and eyes no doubt turned
behind him   and the distance soon lengthened beyond recall with a
wistful eye she looked after him sighed and wept again as the servant
who then slyly passed her observed 

by this time she had reached the houses she looked up at every one as
she passed now and then breathing upon her bared hand and applying it
to her swelled eyes to abate the redness and dry the tears at last 
seeing a bill up for letting lodgings she walked backwards and forwards
half a dozen times as if unable to determine what to do and then went
farther into the town and there the fellow being spoken to by one of
his familiars lost her for a few minutes but he soon saw her come out
of a linen-drapery shop attended with a servant-maid having as it
proved got that maid-servant to go with her to the house she is now at 


 see letter xxi of this volume 


the fellow after waiting about an hour and not seeing her come out 
returned concluding that she had taken lodgings there 

and here supposing my narrative of the dramatic kind ends act the
first and now begins


act ii
scene hampstead heath continued 
enter my rascal 

will having got at all these particulars by exchanging others as
frankly against them with which i had formerly prepared him both
verbally and in writing i found the people already of my party and
full of good wishes for my success repeating to me all they told him 

but he had first acquainted me with the accounts he had given them of his
lady and me it is necessary that i give thee the particulars of his
tale and i have a little time upon my hands for the maid of the house 
who had been out of an errand tells us that she saw mrs moore  with
whom must be my first business   go into the house of a young gentleman 
within a few doors of her who has a maiden sister miss rawlins by name 
so notified for prudence that none of her acquaintance undertake any
thing of consequence without consulting her 

meanwhile my honest coachman is walking about miss rawlin's door in
order to bring me notice of mrs moore's return to her own house i hope
her gossip's-tale will be as soon told as mine which take as follows 

will told them before i came that his lady was but lately married to
one of the finest gentlemen in the world but that he being very gay
and lively she was mortal jealous of him and in a fit of that sort 
had eloped from him for although she loved him dearly and he doated
upon her as well he might since as they had seen she was the finest
creature that ever the sun shone upon yet she was apt to be very wilful
and sullen if he might take liberty to say so but truth was truth and
if she could not have her own way in every thing would be for leaving
him that she had three or four times played his master such tricks but
with all the virtue and innocence in the world running away to an
intimate friend of her's who though a young lady of honour was but too
indulgent to her in this only failing for which reason his master has
brought her to london lodgings their usual residence being in the
country and that on his refusing to satisfy her about a lady he had
been seen with in st james's park she had for the first time since she
came to town served his master thus whom he had left half-distracted on
this account 

and truly well he might poor gentleman cried the honest folks pitying
me before they saw me 

he told them how he came by his intelligence of her and made himself
such an interest with them that they helped him to a change of clothes
for himself and the landlord at his request privately inquired if the
lady actually remained at mrs moore's and for how long she had taken
the lodgings which he found only to be for a week certain but she had
said that she believed she should hardly stay so long and then it was
that he wrote his letter and sent it by honest peter patrick as thou
hast heard 

when i came my person and dress having answered will s description the
people were ready to worship me i now-and-then sighed now-and-then put
on a lighter air which however i designed should show more of vexation
ill-disguised than of real cheerfulness and they told will it was such
a thousand pities so fine a lady should have such skittish tricks 
adding that she might expose herself to great dangers by them for that
there were rakes every where  lovelaces in every corner jack   and many
about that town who would leave nothing unattempted to get into her
company and although they might not prevail upon her yet might they
nevertheless hurt her reputation and in time estrange the affections
of so fine a gentleman from her 

good sensible people these hey jack 

here landlord one word with you my servant i find has acquainted
you with the reason of my coming this way an unhappy affair landlord 
 a very unhappy affair but never was there a more virtuous woman 

so sir she seems to be a thousand pities her ladyship has such ways 
and to so good-humoured a gentleman as you seem to be sir 

mother-spoilt landlord mother-spoilt that's the thing but
 sighing  i must make the best of it what i want you to do for me is to
lend me a great-coat i care not what it is if my spouse should see me
at a distance she would make it very difficult for me to get at her
speech a great-coat with a cape if you have one i must come upon her
before she is aware 

i am afraid sir i have none fit for such a gentleman as you 

o any thing will do the worse the better 


exit landlord re-enter with two great-coats 

ay landlord this will be best for i can button the cape over the lower
part of my face don't i look devilishly down and concerned landlord 

i never saw a gentleman with a better-natured look tis pity you should
have such trials sir 

i must be very unhappy no doubt of it landlord and yet i am a little
pleased you must needs think that i have found her out before any great
inconvenience has arisen to her however if i cannot break her of these
freaks she'll break my heart for i do love her with all her failings 

the good woman who was within hearing of all this pitied me much 

pray your honour said she if i may be so bold was madam ever a mamma 

no  and i sighed   we have been but a little while married and as i
may say to you it is her own fault that she is not in that way  not a
word of a lie in this jack   but to tell you truth madam she may be
compared to the dog in the manger 

i understand you sir  simpering   she is but young sir i have heard
of one or two such skittish young ladies in my time sir but when
madam is in that way i dare say as she loves you and it would be
strange if she did not all this will be over and she may make the best
of wives 

that's all my hope 

she is a fine lady as i ever beheld i hope sir you won't be too
severe she'll get over all these freaks if once she be a mamma i
warrant 

i can't be severe to her she knows that the moment i see her all
resentment is over with me if she gives me but one kind look 

all this time i was adjusting the horseman's coat and will was putting
in the ties of my wig and buttoning the cape over my chin 


 the fashionable wigs at that time 


i asked the gentlewoman for a little powder she brought me a powder-
box and i slightly shook the puff over my hat and flapt one side of it 
though the lace looked a little too gay for my covering and slouching
it over my eyes shall i be known think you madam 

your honour is so expert sir i wish if i may be so bold your lady
has not some cause to be jealous but it will be impossible if you keep
your laced clothes covered that any body should know you in that dress
to be the same gentleman except they find you out by your clocked
stockings 

well observed can't you landlord lend or sell me a pair of stockings 
that will draw over these i can cut off the feet if they won't go into
my shoes 

he could let me have a pair of coarse but clean stirrup stockings if i
pleased 

the best in the world for the purpose 

he fetch'd them will drew them on and my legs then made a good gouty
appearance 

the good woman smiling wished me success and so did the landlord and
as thou knowest that i am not a bad mimic i took a cane which i
borrowed of the landlord and stooped in the shoulders to a quarter of a
foot less height and stumped away cross to the bowling-green to
practise a little the hobbling gait of a gouty man the landlady
whispered her husband as will tells me he's a good one i warrant him
 i dare say the fault lies not at all of one side while mine host
replied that i was so lively and so good-natured a gentleman that he
did not know who could be angry with me do what i would a sensible
fellow i wish my charmer were of the same opinion 

and now i am going to try if i can't agree with goody moore for lodgings
and other conveniencies for my sick wife 

wife lovelace  methinks thou interrogatest 

yes wife for who knows what cautions the dear fugitive may have given
in apprehension of me 

but has goody moore any other lodgings to let 

yes yes i have taken care of that and find that she has just such
conveniencies as i want and i know that my wife will like them for 
although married i can do every thing i please and that's a bold word 
you know but had she only a garret to let i would have liked it and
been a poor author afraid of arrests and made that my place of refuge 
yet would have made shift to pay beforehand for what i had i can suit
myself to any condition that's my comfort 


 


the widow moore returned say you down down flutterer this
impertinent heart is more troublesome to me than my conscience i think 
 i shall be obliged to hoarsen my voice and roughen my character to
keep up with its puppily dancings 

but let me see shall i be angry or pleased when i am admitted to my
beloved's presence 

angry to be sure has she not broken her word with me at a time too
when i was meditating to do her grateful justice and is not breach of
word a dreadful crime in good folks i have ever been for forming my
judgment of the nature of things and actions not so much from what they
are in themselves as from the character of the actors thus it would be
as odd a thing in such as we to keep our words with a woman as it would
be wicked in her to break her's to us 

seest thou not that this unseasonable gravity is admitted to quell the
palpitations of this unmanageable heart but still it will go on with
its boundings i'll try as i ride in my chariot to tranquilize 

ride bob so little a way 

yes ride jack for am i not lame and will it not look well to have a
lodger who keeps his chariot what widow what servant asks questions
of a man with an equipage 

my coachman as well as my other servant is under will s tuition 

never was there such a hideous rascal as he has made himself the devil
only and his other master can know him they both have set their marks
upon him as to my honour's mark it will never be out of his dam'd wide
mothe as he calls it for the dog will be hanged before he can lose the
rest of his teeth by age 

i am gone 



letter xxiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
hampstead friday night june 9 


now belford for the narrative of narratives i will continue it as i
have opportunity and that so dexterously that if i break off twenty
times thou shalt not discern where i piece my thread 

although grievously afflicted with the gout i alighted out of my chariot
 leaning very hard on my cane with one hand and on my new servant's
shoulder with the other the same instant almost that he had knocked at
the door that i might be sure of admission into the house 

i took care to button my great coat about me and to cover with it even
the pummel of my sword it being a little too gay for my years i knew
not what occasion i might have for my sword i stooped forward blinked
with my eyes to conceal their lustre no vanity in saying that jack my
chin wrapt up for the tooth-ache my slouched laced hat and so much of
my wig as was visible giving me all together the appearance of an
antiquated beau 

my wife i resolved beforehand should have a complication of disorders 

the maid came to the door i asked for her mistress she showed me into
one of the parlours and i sat down with a gouty oh 


enter goody moore 

your servant madam but you must excuse me i cannot well stand i find
by the bill at the door that you have lodgings to let  mumbling my words
as if like my man will i had lost some of my fore-teeth  be pleased
to inform me what they are for i like your situation and i will tell
you my family i have a wife a good old woman older than myself by the
way a pretty deal she is in a bad state of health and is advised into
the hampstead air she will have two maid servants and a footman the
coach or chariot i shall not have them put up both together we can put
up any where and the coachman will be with his horses 

when sir shall you want to come in 

i will take them from this very day and if convenient will bring my
wife in the afternoon 

perhaps sir you would board as well as lodge 

that as you please it will save me the trouble of bringing my cook if
we do and i suppose you have servants who know how to dress a couple of
dishes my wife must eat plain food and i don't love kickshaws 

we have a single lady who will be gone in two or three days she has
one of the best apartments that will then be at liberty 

you have one or two good ones mean time i presume madam just to
receive my wife for we have lost time these damn'd physicians excuse
me madam i am not used to curse but it is owing to the love i have for
my wife they have kept her in hand till they are ashamed to take more
fees and now advise her to the air i wish we had sent her hither at
first but we must now make the best of it 

excuse me madam  for she looked hard at me   that i am muffled up in
this warm weather i am but too sensible that i have left my chamber
sooner that i ought and perhaps shall have a return of my gout for it 
i came out thus muffled up with a dreadful pain in my jaws an ague in
them i believe but my poor dear will not be satisfied with any body's
care but mine and as i told thee we have lost time 

you shall see what accommodations i have if you please sir but i
doubt you are too lame to walk up stairs 

i can make shift to hobble up now i have rested a little i'll just look
upon the apartment my wife is to have any thing may do for the
servants and as you seem to be a good sort of gentlewoman i shan't
stand for a price and will pay well besides for the trouble i shall
give 

she led the way and i helping myself by the banisters made shift to
get up with less fatigue than i expected from ancles so weak but oh 
jack what was sixtus the vth s artful depression of his natural powers
to mine when as this half-dead montalto he gaped for the pretendedly
unsought pontificate and the moment he was chosen leapt upon the
prancing beast which it was thought by the amazed conclave he was not
able to mount without help of chairs and men never was there a more
joyful heart and lighter heels than mine joined together yet both denied
their functions the one fluttering in secret ready to burst its bars
for relief-ful expression the others obliged to an hobbling motion 
when unrestrained they would in their master's imagination have
mounted him to the lunar world without the help of a ladder 

there were three rooms on a floor two of them handsome and the third 
she said still handsomer but the lady was in it 

i saw i saw she was for as i hobbled up crying out upon my weak
ancles in the hoarse mumbling voice i had assumed i beheld a little
piece of her as she just cast an eye with the door a-jar as they call
it to observe who was coming up and seeing such an old clumsy fellow 
great coated in weather so warm slouched and muffled up she withdrew 
shutting the door without any emotion but it was not so with me for
thou canst not imagine how my heart danced to my mouth at the very
glimpse of her so that i was afraid the thump thump thumping villain 
which had so lately thumped as much to no purpose would have choked me 

i liked the lodging well and the more as she said the third room was
still handsomer i must sit down madam  and chose the darkest part of
the room  won't you take a seat yourself no price shall part us but i
will leave the terms to you and my wife if you please and also whether
for board or not only please to take this for earnest putting a guinea
into her hand and one thing i will say my poor wife loves money but is
not an ill-natured woman she was a great fortune to me but as the real
estate goes away at her death i would fain preserve her for that reason 
as well as for the love i bear her as an honest man but if she makes
too close a bargain with you tell me and unknown to her i will make
it up this is my constant way she loves to have her pen'orths and i
would not have her vexed or made uneasy on any account 

she said i was a very considerate gentleman and upon the condition i
had mentioned she was content to leave the terms to my lady 

but madam cannot a body just peep into the other apartment that i may
be more particular to my wife in the furniture of it 

the lady desires to be private sir but and was going to ask her leave 

i caught hold of her arm however stay stay madam it mayn't be
proper if the lady loves to be private don't let me intrude upon the
lady 

no intrusion sir i dare say the lady is good-humoured she will be so
kind as to step down into the parlour i dare say as she stays so
little a while i am sure she will not wish to stand in my way 

no madam that's true if she be good-humoured as you say has she been
with you long madam 

she came but yesterday sir 

i believe i just now saw the glimpse of her she seems to be an elderly
lady 

no sir you're mistaken she's a young lady and one of the handsomest
i ever saw 

cot so i beg her pardon not but that i should have liked her the
better were she to stay longer if she had been elderly i have a
strange taste madam you'll say but i really for my wife's sake love
every elderly woman indeed i ever thought age was to be reverenced 
which made me taking the fortune into the scale too that i own make my
addresses to my present dear 

very good of you sir to respect age we all hope to live to be old 

right madam but you say the lady is beautiful now you must know 
that though i choose to converse with the elderly yet i love to see a
beautiful young woman just as i love to see fine flowers in a garden 
there's no casting an eye upon her is there without her notice for in
this dress and thus muffled up about my jaws i should not care to be
seen any more than she let her love privacy as much as she will 

i will go and ask if i may show a gentleman the apartment sir and as
you are a married gentleman and not over young she'll perhaps make the
less scruple 

then like me she loves elderly folks best perhaps but it may be she
has suffered by young ones 

i fancy she has sir or is afraid she shall she desired to be very
private and if by description inquired after to be denied 

thou art a true woman goody moore thought i 

good lack good lack what may be her story then i pray 

she is pretty reserved in her story but to tell you my thoughts i
believe love is in the case she is always in tears and does not much
care for company 

nay madam it becomes not me to dive into ladies' secrets i want not to
pry into other people's affairs but pray how does she employ
herself yet she came but yesterday so you can't tell 

writing continually sir 

these women jack when you ask them questions by way of information 
don't care to be ignorant of any thing 

nay excuse me madam i am very far from being an inquisitive man but
if her case be difficult and not merely love as she is a friend of
your's i would give her my advice 

then you are a lawyer sir 

why indeed madam i was some time at the bar but i have long left
practice yet am much consulted by my friends in difficult points in a
pauper case i frequently give money but never take any from the richest 

you are a very good gentleman then sir 

ay madam we cannot live always here and we ought to do what good we
can but i hate to appear officious if the lady stay any time and
think fit upon better acquaintance to let me into her case it may be a
happy day for her if i find it a just one for you must know that when
i was at the bar i never was such a sad fellow as to undertake for the
sake of a paltry fee to make white black and black white for what
would that have been but to endeavour to establish iniquity by quirks 
while i robbed the innocent 

you are an excellent gentleman sir i wish  and then she sighed  i had
had the happiness to know there was such a lawyer in the world and to
have been acquainted with him 

come come mrs moore i think your name is it may not be too late 
when you and i are better acquainted i may help you perhaps but
mention nothing of this to the lady for as i said i hate to appear
officious 

this prohibition i knew if goody moore answered the specimen she had
given of her womanhood would make her take the first opportunity to
tell were it to be necessary to my purpose that she should 

i appeared upon the whole so indifferent about seeing the room or the
lady that the good woman was the more eager i should see both and the
rather as i to stimulate her declared that there was more required in
my eye to merit the character of a handsome woman than most people
thought necessary and that i had never seen six truly lovely women in my
life 

to be brief she went in and after a little while came out again the
lady sir is retired to her closet so you may go in and look at the
room 

then how my heart began again to play its pug's tricks 

i hobbled in and stumped about and liked it very much and was sure my
wife would i begged excuse for sitting down and asked who was the
minister of the place if he were a good preacher who preached at the
chapel and if he were a good preacher and a good liver too madam i
must inquire after that for i love but i must needs say that the
clergy should practise what they preach 

very right sir but that is not so often the case as were to be wished 

more's the pity madam but i have a great veneration for the clergy in
general it is more a satire upon human nature than upon the cloth if
we suppose those who have the best opportunities to do good less perfect
than other people for my part i don't love professional any more than
national reflections but i keep the lady in her closet my gout makes
me rude 

then up from my seat stumped i what do you call these window-curtains 
madam 

stuff-damask sir 

it looks mighty well truly i like it better than silk it is warmer
to be sure and much fitter for lodgings in the country especially for
people in years the bed is in a pretty state 

it is neat and clean sir that's all we pretend to 

ay mighty well very well a silk camblet i think very well truly i
am sure my wife will like it but we would not turn the lady out of her
lodgings for the world the other two apartments will do for us at
present 

then stumping towards the closet over the door of which hung a
picture what picture is that oh i see a st cecilia 

a common print sir 

pretty well pretty well it is after an italian master i would not
for the world turn the lady out of her apartment we can make shift with
the other two repeated i louder still but yet mumblingly hoarse for i
had as great regard to uniformity in accent as to my words 

o belford to be so near my angel think what a painful constraint i was
under 

i was resolved to fetch her out if possible and pretending to be
going you can't agree as to any time mrs moore when we can have this
third room can you not that  whispered i loud enough to be heard in
the next room not that  i would incommode the lady but i would tell my
wife when abouts and women you know mrs moore love to have every
thing before them of this nature 

mrs moore said my charmer  and never did her voice sound so harmonious
to me oh how my heart bounded again it even talked to me in a
manner for i thought i heard as well as felt its unruly flutters and
every vein about me seemed a pulse mrs moore  you may acquaint the
gentleman that i shall stay here only for two or three days at most 
till i receive an answer to a letter i have written into the country and
rather than be your hindrance i will take up with any apartment a pair
of stairs higher 

not for the world not for the world young lady cried i my wife as
i love her should lie in a garret rather than put such a considerate
young lady as you seem to be to the least inconveniency 

she opened not the door yet and i said but since you have so much
goodness madam if i could but just look into the closet as i stand i
could tell my wife whether it is large enough to hold a cabinet she much
values and ill have with her wherever she goes 

then my charmer opened the door and blazed upon me as it were in a
flood of light like what one might imagine would strike a man who born
blind had by some propitious power been blessed with his sight all at
once in a meridian sun 

upon my soul i never was so strangely affected before i had much ado
to forbear discovering myself that instant but hesitatingly and in
great disorder i said looking into the closet and around it there is
room i see for my wife's cabinet and it has many jewels in it of high
price but upon my soul  for i could not forbear swearing like a
puppy habit is a cursed thing jack   nothing so valuable as a lady i
see can be brought into it 

she started and looked at me with terror the truth of the compliment 
as far as i know had taken dissimulation from my accent 

i saw it was impossible to conceal myself longer from her any more than
 from the violent impulses of my passion to forbear manifesting myself 
i unbuttoned therefore my cape i pulled off my flapt slouched hat i
threw open my great coat and like the devil in milton  an odd
comparison though   

 i started up in my own form divine 
 touch'd by the beam of her celestial eye 
 more potent than ithuriel's spear 

now belford for a similitude now for a likeness to illustrate the
surprising scene and the effect it had upon my charmer and the
gentlewoman but nothing was like it or equal to it the plain fact
can only describe it and set it off thus then take it 

she no sooner saw who it was than she gave three violent screams and 
before i could catch her in my arms as i was about to do the moment i
discovered myself down she sunk at my feet in a fit which made me
curse my indiscretion for so suddenly and with so much emotion 
revealing myself 

the gentlewoman seeing so strange an alteration in my person and
features and voice and dress cried out murder help murder help by
turns for half a dozen times running this alarmed the house and up
ran two servant maids and my servant after them i cried out for water
and hartshorn and every one flew a different way one of the maids as
fast down as she came up while the gentlewoman ran out of one room into
another and by turns up and down the apartment we were in without
meaning or end wringing her foolish hands and not knowing what she did 

up then came running a gentleman and his sister fetched and brought in
by the maid who had run down and having let in a cursed crabbed old
wretch hobbling with his gout and mumbling with his hoarse
broken-toothed voice who was metamorphosed all at once into a lively 
gay young fellow with a clear accent and all his teeth she would have
it that i was neither more nor less than the devil and could not keep
her eye from my foot expecting no doubt every minute to see it
discover itself to be cloven 

for my part i was so intent upon restoring my angel that i regarded
nobody else and at last she slowly recovering motion with bitter
sighs and sobs only the whites of her eyes however appearing for some
moments i called upon her in the tenderest accent as i kneeled by her 
my arm supporting her head my angel my charmer my clarissa look upon
me my dearest life i am not angry with you i will forgive you my
best beloved 

the gentleman and his sister knew not what to make of all this and the
less when my fair-one recovering her sight snatched another look at
me and then again groaned and fainted away 

i threw up the closet-sash for air and then left her to the care of the
young gentlewoman the same notable miss rawlins who i had heard of at
the flask and to that of mrs moore who by this time had recovered
herself and then retiring to one corner of the room i made my servant
pull off my gouty stockings brush my hat and loop it up into the usual
smart cock 

i then stept to the closet to mr rawlins whom in the general
confusion i had not much minded before sir said i you have an
uncommon scene before you the lady is my wife and no gentleman's
presence is necessary here but my own 

i beg pardon sir if the lady be your wife i have no business here 
but sir by her concern at seeing you 

pray sir none of your if's and but's i beseech you nor your concern
about the lady's concern you are a very unqualified judge in this
cause and i beg of you sir to oblige me with your absence the women
only are proper to be present on this occasion added i and i think
myself obliged to them for their care and kind assistance 

tis well he made not another word for i found my choler begin to rise 
i could not bear that the finest neck and arms and foot in the world 
should be exposed to the eyes of any man living but mine 

i withdrew once more from the closet finding her beginning to recover 
lest the sight of me too soon should throw her back again 

the first words she said looking round her with great emotion were oh 
hide me hide me is he gone oh hide me is he gone 

sir said miss rawlins coming to me with an air both peremptory and
assured this is some surprising case the lady cannot bear the sight of
you what you have done is best known to yourself but another such fit
will probably be her last it would be but kind therefore for you to
retire 

it behoved me to have so notable a person of my party and the rather as
i had disobliged her impertinent brother 

the dear creature said i may well be concerned to see me if you 
madam had a husband who loved you as i love her you would not i am
confident fly from him and expose yourself to hazards as she does
whenever she has not all her way and yet with a mind not capable of
intentional evil but mother-spoilt this is her fault and all her
fault and the more inexcusable it is as i am the man of her choice and
have reason to think she loves me above all the men in the world 

here jack was a story to support to the lady face to face too 


 and here belford lest thou through inattention should be surprised
at my assurance let me remind thee and that thus by way of marginal
observation that i may not break in upon my narrative that this my
intrepidity concerted as i have from time to time acquainted thee in
apprehension of such an event as has fallen out for had not the dear
creature already passed for my wife before no less than four worthy
gentlemen of family and fortune and before mrs sinclair and her
household and miss partington and had she not agreed to her uncle's
expedient that she should pass for such from the time of mr hickman's
application to that uncle and that the worthy capt tomlinson should
be allowed to propagate that belief as he had actually reported to two
families they possibly to more purposely that it might come to the
ears of james harlowe and serve for a foundation for uncle john to build
his reconciliation-scheme upon  and canst thou think that nothing was
meant by all this contrivance and that i am not still further prepared
to support my story 

 see vol iv letter iv towards the conclusion 
 ibid letter xvi 
 ibid 

indeed i little thought at the time that i formed these precautionary
schemes that she would ever have been able if willing to get out of my
hands all that i hoped i should have occasion to have recourse to them
for was only in case i should have the courage to make the grand
attempt and should succeed in it to bring the dear creature  and this
out of tenderness to her for what attention did i ever yet pay to the
grief the execrations the tears of a woman i had triumphed over   to
bear me in her sight to expostulate with me to be pacified by my pleas 
and by my own future hopes founded upon the reconciliatory-project upon
my reiterated vows and upon the captain's assurances since in that
case to forgive me to have gone on with me for a week would have been
to forgive me to have gone on with me for ever and that had my
eligible life of honour taken place her trials would all have been then
over and she would have known nothing but gratitude love and joy to
the end of one of our lives for never would i never could i have
abandoned such an admirable creature as this thou knowest i never was a
sordid villain to any of her inferiors her inferiors i may say for who
is not her inferior 


you speak like a gentleman you look like a gentleman said miss
rawlins but sir this is a strange case the lady sees to dread the
sight of you 

no wonder madam taking her a little on one side nearer to mrs moore 
i have three times already forgiven the dear creature but this is
jealousy there is a spice of that in it and of phrensy too  whispered
i that it might have the face of a secret and of consequence the more
engage their attention  but our story is too long 

i then made a motion to go to my beloved but they desired that i would
walk into the next room and they would endeavour to prevail upon her to
lie down 

i begged that they would not suffer her to talk for that she was
accustomed to fits and when in this way would talk of any thing that
came uppermost and the more she was suffered to run on the worse she
was and if not kept quiet would fall into ravings which might possibly
hold her a week 

they promised to keep her quiet and i withdrew into the next room 
ordering every one down but mrs moore and miss rawlins 

she was full of exclamations unhappy creature miserable ruined and
undone she called herself wrung her hands and begged they would assist
her to escape from the terrible evils she should otherwise be made to
suffer 

they preached patience and quietness to her and would have had her to
lie down but she refused sinking however into an easy chair for she
trembled so she could not stand 

by this time i hoped that she was enough recovered to bear a presence
that it behoved me to make her bear and fearing she would throw out
something in her exclamations that would still more disconcert me i
went into the room again 

o there he is said she and threw her apron over her face i cannot see
him i cannot look upon him begone begone touch me not 

for i took her struggling hand beseeching her to be pacified and
assuring her that i would make all up with her upon her own terms and
wishes 

base man said the violent lady i have no wishes but never to behold
you more why must i be thus pursued and haunted have you not made me
miserable enough already despoiled of all succour and help and of
every friend i am contented to be poor low and miserable so i may
live free from your persecutions 

miss rawlins stared at me  a confident slut this miss rawlins thought
i  so did mrs moore i told you so whispering said i turning to the
women shaking my head with a face of great concern and pity and then to
my charmer my dear creature how you rave you will not easily recover
from the effects of this violence have patience my love be pacified 
and we will coolly talk this matter over for you expose yourself as
well as me these ladies will certainly think you have fallen among
robbers and that i am the chief of them 

so you are so you are stamping her face still covered  she thought of
wednesday night no doubt  and sighing as if her heart were breaking 
she put her hand to her forehead i shall be quite distracted 

i will not my dearest love uncover your face you shall not look upon
me since i am so odious to you but this is a violence i never thought
you capable of 

and i would have pressed her hand as i held it with my lips but she
drew it from me with indignation 

unhand me sir said she i will not be touched by you leave me to my
fate what right what title have you to persecute me thus 

what right what title my dear but this is not a time i have a letter
from captain tomlinson here it is offering it to her 

i will receive nothing from your hands tell me not of captain
tomlinson tell me not of any body you have no right to invade me thus 
once more leave me to my fate have you not made me miserable enough 

i touched a delicate string on purpose to set her in such a passion
before the women as might confirm the intimation i had given of a
phrensical disorder 

what a turn is here lately so happy nothing wanting but a
reconciliation between you and your friends that reconciliation in such
a happy train shall so slight so accidental an occasion be suffered to
overturn all our happiness 

she started up with a trembling impatience her apron falling from her
indignant face now said she that thou darest to call the occasion
slight and accidental and that i am happily out of thy vile hands and
out of a house i have reason to believe as vile traitor and wretch as
thou art i will venture to cast an eye upon thee and oh that it were
in my power in mercy to my sex to look thee first into shame and
remorse and then into death 

this violent tragedy-speech and the high manner in which she uttered it 
had its desired effect i looked upon the women and upon her by turns 
with a pitying eye and they shook their wise heads and besought me to
retire and her to lie down to compose herself 

this hurricane like other hurricanes was presently allayed by a shower 
she threw herself once more into her armed chair and begged pardon of
the women for her passionate excess but not of me yet i was in hopes 
that when compliments were stirring i should have come in for a share 

indeed ladies said i  with assurance enough thou'lt say   this
violence is not natural to my beloved's temper misapprehension 

misapprehension wretch and want i excuses from thee 

by what a scorn was every lovely feature agitated 

then turning her face from me i have not patience o thou guileful
betrayer to look upon thee begone begone with a face so
unblushing how darest thou appear in my presence 

i thought then that the character of a husband obliged me to be angry 

you may one day madam repent this treatment by my soul you may you
know i have not deserved it of you you know i have not 

do i know you have not wretch do i know 

you do madam and never did man of my figure and consideration  i
thought it was proper to throw that in  meet with such treatment 

she lifted up her hands indignation kept her silent 

but all is of a piece with the charge you bring against me of despoiling
you of all succour and help of making you poor and low and with other
unprecedented language i will only say before these two gentlewomen 
that since it must be so and since your former esteem for me is turned
into so riveted an aversion i will soon very soon make you entirely
easy i will be gone i will leave you to your own fate as you call
it and may that be happy only that i may not appear to be a spoiler 
a robber indeed let me know whither i shall send your apparel and every
thing that belongs to you and i will send it 

send it to this place and assure me that you will never molest me more 
never more come near me and that is all i ask of you 

i will do so madam said i with a dejected air but did i ever think i
should be so indifferent to you however you must permit me to insist
on your reading this letter and on your seeing captain tomlinson and
hearing what he has to say from your uncle he will be here by-and-by 

don't trifle with me said she in an imperious tone do as you offer i
will not receive any letter from your hands if i see captain tomlinson 
it shall be on his own account not on your's you tell me you will send
me my apparel if you would have me believe any thing you say let this
be the test of your sincerity leave me now and send my things 

the women started they did nothing but stare and appeared to be more
and more at a loss what to make of the matter between us 

i pretended to be going from her in a pet but when i had got to the
door i turned back and as if i had recollected myself one word more 
my dearest creature charming even in your anger o my fond soul said
i turning half round and pulling out my handkerchief 

i believe jack my eyes did glisten a little i have no doubt but they
did the women pitied me honest souls they showed they had each of
them a handkerchief as well as i so has thou not observed to give a
familiar illustration every man in a company of a dozen or more 
obligingly pull out his watch when some one has asked what's o'clock 
as each man of a like number if one talks of his beard will fall to
stroking his chin with his four fingers and thumb 

one word only madam repeated i as soon as my voice had recovered its
tone i have represented to captain tomlinson in the most favourable
light the cause of our present misunderstanding you know what your
uncle insists upon and with which you have acquiesced the letter in my
hand  and again i offered it to her   will acquaint you with what you
have to apprehend from your brother's active malice 

she was going to speak in a high accent putting the letter from her 
with an open palm nay hear me out madam the captain you know has
reported our marriage to two different persons it is come to your
brother's ears my own relations have also heard of it letters were
brought me from town this morning from lady betty lawrance and miss
montague here they are  i pulled them out of my pocket and offered
them to her with that of the captain but she held back her still open
palm that she might not receive them   reflect madam i beseech you 
reflect upon the fatal consequences with which this your high
resentment may be attended 

ever since i knew you said she i have been in a wilderness of doubt
and error i bless god that i am out of your hands i will transact for
myself what relates to myself i dismiss all your solicitude for me 
am i not my own mistress have you any title 

the women stared  the devil stare ye thought i can ye do nothing but
stare   it was high time to stop her here 

i raised my voice to drown her's you used my dearest creature to have
a tender and apprehensive heart you never had so much reason for such a
one as now 

let me judge for myself upon what i shall see not upon what i shall
hear do you think i shall ever 

i dreaded her going on i must be heard madam raising my voice still
higher you must let me read one paragraph or two out of this letter to
you if you will not read it yourself 

begone from me man begone from me with thy letters what pretence
hast thou for tormenting me thus what right what title 

dearest creature what questions you ask questions that you can as well
answer yourself 

i can i will and thus i answer them 

still louder i raised my voice she was overborne sweet soul it
would be hard thought i  and yet i was very angry with her   if such a
spirit as thine cannot be brought to yield to such a one as mine 

i lowered my voice on her silence all gentle all intreative my
accent my head bowed one hand held out the other on my honest heart 
 for heaven's sake my dearest creature resolve to see captain
tomlinson with temper he would have come along with me but i was
willing to try to soften your mind first on this fatal misapprehension 
and this for the same of your own wishes for what is it otherwise to
me whether your friends are or are not reconciled to us do i want
any favour from them for your own mind's sake therefore frustrate not
captain tomlinson's negociation that worthy gentleman will be here in
the afternoon lady betty will be in town with my cousin montague in a
day or two they will be your visiters i beseech you do not carry this
misunderstanding so far as that lord m and lady betty and lady sarah 
may know it  how considerable this made me look to the women   lady
betty will not let you rest till you consent to accompany her to her own
seat and to that lady may you safely intrust your cause 

again upon my pausing a moment she was going to break out i liked not
the turn of her countenance nor the tone of her voice and thinkest
thou base wretch  were the words she did utter i again raised my
voice and drowned her's base wretch madam you know that i have not
deserved the violent names you have called me words so opprobrious from
a mind so gentle but this treatment is from you madam from you whom
i love more than my own soul by that soul i swear that i do  the
women looked upon each other they seemed pleased with my ardour women 
whether wives maids or widows love ardours even miss howe thou
knowest speaks up for ardours   nevertheless i must say that you
have carried matters too far for the occasion i see you hate me 


 see vol iv letters xxix and xxxiv 


she was just going to speak if we are to separate for ever in a strong
and solemn voice proceeded i this island shall not long be troubled
with me mean time only be pleased to give these letters a perusal and
consider what is to be said to your uncle's friend and what he is to say
to your uncle any thing will i come into renounce me if you will 
that shall make for your peace and for the reconciliation your heart was
so lately set upon but i humbly conceive that it is necessary that you
should come into better temper with me were it but to give a favourable
appearance to what has passed and weight to any future application to
your friends in whatever way you shall think proper to make it 

i then put the letters into her lap and retired into the next apartment
with a low bow and a very solemn air 

i was soon followed by the two women mrs moore withdrew to give the
fair perverse time to read them miss rawlins for the same reason and
because she was sent for home 

the widow besought her speedy return i joined in the same request and
she was ready enough to promise to oblige us 

i excused myself to mrs moore for the disguise i had appeared in at
first and for the story i had invented i told her that i held myself
obliged to satisfy her for the whole floor we were upon and for an upper
room for my servant and that for a month certain 

she made many scruples and begged she might not be urged on this head 
till she had consulted miss rawlins 

i consented but told her that she had taken my earnest and i hoped
there was no room for dispute 

just then miss rawlins returned with an air of eager curiosity and
having been told what had passed between mrs moore and me she gave
herself airs of office immediately which i humoured plainly perceiving
that if i had her with me i had the other 

she wished if there were time for it and if it were not quite
impertinent in her to desire it that i would give mrs moore and her a
brief history of an affair which as she said bore the face of novelty 
mystery and surprise for sometimes it looked to her as if we were
married at other times that point appeared doubtful and yet the lady
did not absolutely deny it but upon the whole thought herself highly
injured 

i said that our's was a very particular case that were i to acquaint
them with it some part of it would hardly appear credible but 
however as they seemed hardly to be persons of discretion i would give
them a brief account of the whole and this in so plain and sincere a
manner that it should clear up to their satisfaction every thing that
had passed or might hereafter pass between us 

they sat down by me and threw every feature of their faces into
attention i was resolved to go as near the truth as possible lest any
thing should drop from my spouse to impeach my veracity and yet keep in
view what passed at the flask 

it is necessary although thou knowest my whole story and a good deal of
my views that thou shouldst be apprized of the substance of what i told
them 

i gave them in as concise a manner as i was able this history of our
families fortunes alliances antipathies her brother's and mine
particularly i averred the truth of our private marriage  the
captain's letter which i will enclose will give thee my reasons for
that and besides the women might have proposed a parson to me by way
of compromise i told them the condition my spouse had made me swear
to and to which she held me in order i said to induce me the sooner
to be reconciled to her relations 

i owned that this restraint made me sometimes ready to fly out  and
mrs moore was so good as to declare that she did not much wonder at it 

thou art a very good sort of woman mrs moore thought i 

as miss howe has actually detected our mother and might possibly find
some way still to acquaint her friend with her discoveries i thought it
proper to prepossess them in favour of mrs sinclair and her two nieces 

i said they were gentlewomen born that they had not bad hearts that
indeed my spouse did not love them they having once taken the liberty to
blame her for her over-niceness with regard to me people i said even
good people who knew themselves to be guilty of a fault they had no
inclination to mend were too often least patient when told of it as
they could less bear than others to be thought indifferently of 

too often the case they owned 

mrs sinclair's house was a very handsome house and fit to receive the
first quality  true enough jack   mrs sinclair was a woman very easy
in her circumstances a widow gentlewoman as you mrs moore are 
lets lodgings as you mrs moore do once had better prospects as you 
mrs moore may have had the relict of colonel sinclair you mrs 
moore might know colonel sinclair he had lodgings at hampstead 

she had heard of the name 

oh he was related to the best families in scotland and his widow is
not to be reflected upon because she lets lodgings you know mrs moore 
you know miss rawlins 

very true and very true and they must needs say it did not look quite
so pretty in such a lady as my spouse to be so censorious 

a foundation here thought i to procure these women's help to get back
the fugitive or their connivance at least at my doing so as well as
for anticipating any future information from miss howe 

i gave them a character of that virago and intimated that for a head
to contrive mischief and a heart to execute it she had hardly her equal
in her sex 

to this miss howe it was mrs moore said she supposed that my spouse
was so desirous to dispatch a man and horse by day-dawn with a letter
she wrote before she went to bed last night proposing to stay no longer
than till she had received an answer to it 

the very same said i i knew she would have immediate recourse to her 
i should have been but too happy could i have prevented such a letter
from passing or so to have it managed as to have it given into mrs 
howe's hands instead of her daughter's women who had lived some time
in the world knew better than to encourage such skittish pranks in young
wives 

let me just stop to tell thee while it is in my head that i have since
given will his cue to find out where the man lives who is gone with the
fair fugitive's letter and if possible to see him on his return 
before he sees her 

i told the women i despaired that it would ever be better with us while
miss howe had so strange an ascendancy over my spouse and remained
herself unmarried and until the reconciliation with her friends could
be effected or a still happier event as i should think it who am the
last male of my family and which my foolish vow and her rigour had
hitherto' 

here i stopt and looked modest turning my diamond ring round my finger 
while goody moore looked mighty significant calling it a very particular
case and the maiden fanned away and primm'd and purs'd to show that
what i had said needed no farther explanantion 

i told them the occasion of our present difference i avowed the
reality of the fire but owned that i would have made no scruple of
breaking the unnatural oath she had bound me in having a husband's
right on my side when she was so accidentally frighted into my arms 
and i blamed myself excessively that i did not since she thought fit to
carry her resentment so high and had the injustice to suppose the fire
to be a contrivance of mine 

nay for that matter mrs moore said as we were married and madam was
so odd every gentleman would not and stopt there mrs moore 

to suppose i should have recourse to such a poor contrivance said i 
when i saw the dear creature every hour  was not this a bold put jack 

a most extraordinary case truly cried the maiden fanning yet coming
in with her well-but's and her sifting pray sir's and her
restraining enough sir's flying from the question to the question her
seat now-and-then uneasy for fear my want of delicacy should hurt her
abundant modesty and yet it was difficult to satisfy her super-abundant
curiosity 

my beloved's jealousy  and jealousy of itself to female minds 
accounts for a thousand unaccountablenesses   and the imputation of her
half-phrensy brought upon her by her father's wicked curse and by the
previous persecutions she had undergone from all her family were what i
dwelt upon in order to provide against what might happen 

in short i owned against myself most of the offences which i did not
doubt but she would charge me with in their hearing and as every cause
has a black and white side i gave the worst parts of our story the
gentlest turn and when i had done acquainted them with some of the
contents of that letter of captain tomlinson which i left with the lady 
i concluded with james harlowe and of captain singleton or of any
sailor-looking men 

this thou wilt see from the letter itself was necessary to be done 
here therefore thou mayest read it and a charming letter to my
purpose wilt thou find it to be if thou givest the least attention to
its contents 


to robert lovelace esq 
wedn june 7 

dear sir 

although i am obliged to be in town to-morrow or next day at farthest 
yet i would not dispense with writing to you by one of my servants 
 whom i send up before upon a particular occasion in order to advertise
you that it is probable you will hear from some of your own relations on
your  supposed   nuptials one of the persons mr lilburne by name 
to whom i hinted my belief of your marriage happens to be acquainted
with mr spurrier lady betty lawrance's steward and not being under
any restriction mentioned it to mr spurrier and he to lady betty as a
thing certain and this though i have not the honour to be personally
known to her ladyship brought on an inquiry from her ladyship to me by
her gentleman who coming to me in company with mr lilburne i had no
way but to confirm the report and i understand that lady betty takes
it amiss that she was not acquainted with so desirable a piece of news
from yourself 


 what is between hooks     thou mayest suppose jack i sunk upon the
women in the account i gave them of the contents of this letter 


her ladyship it seems has business that calls her to town  and you will
possibly choose to put her right if you do it will i presume be in
confidence that nothing may transpire from your own family to contradict
what i have given out  

 i have ever been of opinion that truth ought to be strictly adhered to
on all occasions and am concerned that i have though with so good a
view departed from my old maxim but my dear friend mr john harlowe
would have it so yet i never knew a departure of this kind a single
departure but to make the best of it now allow me sir once more to
beg the lady as soon as possible to authenticate the report given out  
when both you and the lady join in the acknowledgement of your marriage 
it will be impertinent in any one to be inquisitive as to the day or
week  and if as privately celebrated as you intend while the
gentlewomen with whom you lodge are properly instructed as you say they
are and who shall actually believe you were married long ago who shall
be able to give a contradiction to my report  

and yet it is very probable that minute inquiries will be made and this
is what renders precaution necessary for mr james harlowe will not
believe that you are married and is sure he says that you both lived
together when mr hickman's application was made to mr john harlowe and
if you lived together any time unmarried he infers from your character 
mr lovelace that it is not probable that you would ever marry and he
leaves it to his two uncles to decide if you even should be married 
whether there be not room to believe that his sister was first
dishonoured and if so to judge of the title she will have to their
favour or to the forgiveness of any of her family i believe sir this
part of my letter had best be kept from the lady 

young mr harlowe is resolved to find this out and to come at his
sister's speech likewise and for that purpose sets out to-morrow as i
am well informed with a large attendance armed and mr solmes is to be
of the party and what makes him the more earnest to find it out is
this mr john harlowe has told the whole family that he will alter and
new-settle his will mr antony harlowe is resolved to do the same by
his for it seems he has now given over all thoughts of changing his
condition having lately been disappointed in a view he had of that sort
with mrs howe these two brothers generally act in concert and mr 
james harlowe dreads and let me tell you that he has reason for it on
my mr harlowe's account that his younger sister will be at last more
benefited than he wishes for by the alteration intended he has already
been endeavouring to sound his uncle harlowe on this subject and wanted
to know whether any new application had been made to him on his sister's
part mr harlowe avoided a direct answer and expressed his wishes for
a general reconciliation and his hopes that his niece were married 
this offended the furious young man and he reminded his uncle of
engagements they had all entered into at his sister's going away not to
be reconciled but by general consent 

mr john harlowe complains to me often of the uncontroulableness of his
nephew and says that now that the young man has not any body of whose
superior sense he stands in awe he observes not decency in his behaviour
to any of them and this makes my mr harlowe still more desirous than
ever of bringing his younger niece into favour again i will not say all
i might of this young man's extraordinary rapaciousness but one would
think that these grasping men expect to live for ever 

i took the liberty but within these two hours to propose to set on foot
 and offered my cover to a correspondence between my friend and his
daughter-niece as she still sometimes fondly calls her she was
mistress of so much prudence i said that i was sure she could better
direct every thing to its desirable end than any body else could but
he said he did not think himself entirely at liberty to take such a step
at present and that it was best that he should have it in his power to
say occasionally that he had not any correspondence with her or letter
from her 

you will see sir from all this the necessity of keeping our treaty an
absolute secret and if the lady has mentioned it to her worthy friend
miss howe i hope it is in confidence 

 and now sir a few lines in answer to your's of monday last  

 mr harlowe was very well pleased with your readiness to come into his
proposal but as to what you both desire that he will be present at the
ceremony he said that his nephew watched all his steps so narrowly 
that he thought it was not practicable if he were inclinable to oblige
you but that he consented with all his heart that i should be the
person whom he had stipulated should be privately present at the ceremony
on his part  

 however i think i have an expedient for this if your lady continues
to be very desirous of her uncle's presence except he should be more
determined than his answer to me seemed to import of which i shall
acquaint you and perhaps of what he says to it when i have the pleasure
to see you in town but indeed i think you have no time to lose mr 
harlowe is impatient to hear that you are actually one and i hope i may
carry him down word when i leave you next that i saw the ceremony
performed  

 if any obstacle arises from the lady from you it cannot i shall be
tempted to think a little hardly of her punctilio  

mr harlowe hopes sir that you will rather take pains to avoid than to
meet this violent young man he has the better opinion of you let me
tell you sir from the account i gave him of your moderation and
politeness neither of which are qualities with his nephew but we have
all of us something to amend 

you cannot imagine how dearly my friend still loves this excellent niece
of his i will give you an instance of it which affected me a good
deal if once more said he the last time but one we were together 
i can but see this sweet child gracing the upper end of my table as
mistress of my house in my allotted month all the rest of my family
present but as her guests for so i formerly would have it and had her
mother's consent for it  there he stopt for he was forced to turn his
reverend face from me tears ran down his cheeks fain would he have
hid them but he could not yet yet said he how how   poor
gentleman he perfectly sobbed   how shall i be able to bear the first
meeting 

i bless god i am no hard-hearted man mr lovelace my eyes showed to my
worthy friend that he had no reason to be ashamed of his humanity before
me 

i will put an end to this long epistle be pleased to make my
compliments acceptable to the most excellent of women as well as believe
me to be 

dear sir 
your faithful friend and humble servant 
antony tomlinson 


 


during the conversation between me and the women i had planted myself at
the farthest end of the apartment we were in over against the door 
which was open and opposite to the lady's chamber-door which was shut 
i spoke so low that it was impossible for her at that distance to hear
what we said and in this situation i could see if her door was opened 

i told the women that what i had mentioned to my spouse of lady betty's
coming to town with her niece montague and of their intention to visit
my beloved whom they had never seen nor she them was real and that i
expected news of their arrival every hour i then showed them copies of
the other two letters which i had left with her the one from lady
betty the other from my cousin montague and here thou mayest read them
if thou wilt 

eternally reproaching eternally upbraiding me are my impertinent
relations but they are fond of occasions to find fault with me their
love their love jack and their dependence on my known good humour are
their inducements 


to robert lovelace esq 
wed morn june 7 

dear nephew 

i understand that at length all our wishes are answered in your happy
marriage but i think we might as well have heard of it directly from
you as from the round-about way by which we have been made acquainted
with it methinks sir the power and the will we have to oblige you 
should not expose us the more to your slights and negligence my brother
had set his heart upon giving to you the wife we have all so long wished
you to have but if you were actually married at the time you made him
that request supposing perhaps that his gout would not let him attend
you it is but like you if your lady had her reasons to wish it to be
private while the differences between her family and self continue you
might nevertheless have communicated it to us with that restriction and
we should have forborne the public manifestations of our joy upon an
event we have so long desired 


 i gave mrs moore and miss rawlins room to think this reproach just 
jack 


the distant way we have come to know it is by my steward who is
acquainted with a friend of captain tomlinson to whom that gentleman
revealed it and he it seems had it from yourself and lady with such
circumstances as leave it not to be doubted 

i am indeed very much disobliged with you so is lady sarah but i
have a very speedy opportunity to tell you so in person being obliged to
go to town to my old chancery affair my cousin leeson who is it
seems removed to albemarle-street has notice of it i shall be at her
house where i bespeak your attendance of sunday night i have written
to my cousin charlotte for either her or her sister to meet me at
reading and accompany me to town i shall stay but a few days my
business being matter of form only on my return i shall pop upon lord
m at m hall to see in what way his last fit has left him 

mean time having told you my mind on your negligence i cannot help
congratulating you both on the occasion your fair lady particularly 
upon her entrance into a family which is prepared to admire and love her 

my principal intention of writing to you dispensing with the necessary
punctilio is that you may acquaint my dear new niece that i will not
be denied the honour of her company down with me into oxfordshire i
understand that your proposed house and equipages cannot be soon ready 
she shall be with me till they are i insist upon it this shall make
all up my house shall be her own my servants and equipages her's 

lady sarah who has not been out of her own house for months will oblige
me with her company for a week in honour of a niece so dearly beloved 
as i am sure she will be of us all 

being but in lodgings in town neither you nor your lady can require much
preparation 

some time on monday i hope to attend the dear young lady to make her my
compliments and to receive her apology for your negligence which and
her going down with me as i said before shall be full satisfaction 
mean time god bless her for her courage tell her i say so and bless
you both in each other and that will be happiness to us all 
particularly to

your truly affectionate aunt 
eliz lawrance 


to robert lovelace esq 

dear cousin 

at last as we understand there is some hope of you now does my good
lord run over his bead-roll of proverbs of black oxen wild oats long
lanes and so forth 

now cousin say i is your time come and you will be no longer i hope 
an infidel either to the power or excellence of the sex you have
pretended hitherto so much as undervalue nor a ridiculer or scoffer at
an institution which all sober people reverence and all rakes sooner or
later are brought to reverence or to wish they had 

i want to see how you become your silken fetters whether the charming
yoke sits light upon your shoulders if with such a sweet yoke-fellow it
does not my lord and my sister as well as i think that you will
deserve a closer tie about your neck 

his lordship is very much displeased that you have not written him word
of the day the hour the manner and every thing but i ask him how he
can already expect any mark of deference or politeness from you he must
stay i tell him till that sign of reformation among others appear
from the influence and example of your lady but that if ever you will
be good for any thing it will be quickly seen and o cousin what a
vast vast journey have you to take from the dreary land of libertinism 
through the bright province of reformation into the serene kingdom of
happiness you had need to lose no time you have many a weary step to
tread before you can overtake those travellers who set out for it from a
less remote quarter but you have a charming pole-star to guide you 
that's your advantage i wish you joy of it and as i have never yet
expected any highly complaisant thing from you i make no scruple to
begin first but it is purely i must tell you in respect to my new
cousin whose accession into our family we most heartily congratulate and
rejoice in 

i have a letter from lady betty she commands either my attendance or my
sister's to my cousin leeson's she puts lord m in hopes that she
shall certainly bring down with her our lovely new relation for she
says she will not be denied his lordship is the willinger to let me be
the person as i am in a manner wild to see her my sister having two
years ago had that honour at sir robert biddulph's so get ready to
accompany us in our return except your lady had objections strong enough
to satisfy us all lady sarah longs to see her and says this accession
to the family will supply to it the loss of her beloved daughter 

i shall soon i hope pay my compliments to the dear lady in person so
have nothing to add but that i am

your old mad playfellow and cousin 
charlotte montague 


 


the women having read the copies of these two letters i thought that i
might then threaten and swagger but very little heart have i said i 
to encourage such a visit from lady betty and miss montague to my spouse 
for after all i am tired out with her strange ways she is not what she
was and as i told her in your hearing ladies i will leave this plaguy
island though the place of my birth and though the stake i have in it
is very considerable and go and reside in france or italy and never
think of myself as a married man nor live like one 

o dear said one 

that would be a sad thing said the other 

nay madam  turning to mrs moore   indeed madam  to miss rawlins   
i am quite desperate i can no longer bear such usage i have had the
good fortune to be favoured by the smiles of very fine ladies though i
say it  and i looked very modest  both abroad and at home  thou knowest
this to be true jack  with regard to my spouse here i have but one
hope left for as to the reconciliation with her friends i left i
scorn them all too much to value that but for her sake and that was 
that if it pleased god to bless us with children she might entirely
recover her usual serenity and we might then be happy but the
reconciliation her heart was so much set upon is now as i hinted
before entirely hopeless made so by this rash step of her's and by
the rash temper she is in since as you will believe her brother and
sister when they come to know it will make a fine handle of it against
us both affecting as they do at present to disbelieve our marriage 
and the dear creature herself too ready to countenance such a disbelief
 as nothing more than the ceremony as nothing more hem as nothing
more than the ceremony 

here as thou wilt perceive i was bashful for miss rawlins by her
preparatory primness put me in mind that it was proper to be so 

i turned half round then facing the fan-player and the matron you
yourselves ladies knew not what to believe till now that i have told
you our story and i do assure you that i shall not give myself the same
trouble to convince people i hate people from whom i neither expect nor
desire any favour and who are determined not to be convinced and what 
pray must be the issue when her uncle's friend comes although he seems
to be a truly worthy man it is not natural for him to say to what
purpose mr lovelace should i endeavour to bring about a reconciliation
between mrs lovelace and her friends by means of her elder uncle when
a good understanding is wanting between yourselves  a fair inference 
mrs moore a fair inference miss rawlins and here is the
unhappiness till she is reconciled to them this cursed oath in her
notion is binding 

the women seemed moved for i spoke with great earnestness though
low and besides they love to have their sex and its favours appear of
importance to us they shook their deep heads at each other and looked
sorrowful and this moved my tender heart too 

tis an unheard-of case ladies had she not preferred me to all
mankind there i stopped and that resumed i feeling for my
handkerchief is what staggered captain tomlinson when he heard of her
flight who the last time he saw us together saw the most affectionate
couple on earth the most affectionate couple on earth in the
accent-grievous repeated i 

out then i pulled my handkerchief and putting it to my eyes arose and
walked to the window it makes me weaker than a woman did i not love
her as never man loved his wife  i have no doubt but i do jack  

there again i stopt and resuming charming creature as you see she is 
i wish i had never beheld her face excuse me ladies traversing the
room and having rubbed my eyes till i supposed them red i turned to the
women and pulling out my letter-case i will show you one letter here
it is read it miss rawlins if you please it will confirm to you how
much all my family are prepared to admire her i am freely treated in
it so i am in the two others but after what i have told you nothing
need be a secret to you two 

she took it with an air of eager curiosity and looked at the seal 
ostentatiously coroneted and at the superscription reading out to
robert lovelace esq ay madam ay miss that's my name  giving
myself an air though i had told it to them before   i am not ashamed of
it my wife's maiden name unmarried name i should rather say fool
that i am and i rubbed my cheek for vexation  fool enough in
conscience jack   was harlowe clarissa harlowe you heard me call her
my clarissa 

i did but thought it to be a feigned or love-name said miss rawlins 

i wonder what is miss rawlins's love-name jack most of the fair
romancers have in their early womanhood chosen love-names no parson
ever gave more real names than i have given fictitious ones and to
very good purpose many a sweet dear has answered me a letter for the
sake of owning a name which her godmother never gave her 

no it was her real name i said 

i bid her read out the whole letter if the spelling be not exact miss
rawlins said i you will excuse it the writer is a lord but perhaps 
i may not show it to my spouse for if those i have left with her have no
effect upon her neither will this and i shall not care to expose my
lord m to her scorn indeed i begin to be quite careless of
consequences 

miss rawlins who could not but be pleased with this mark of my
confidence looked as if she pitied me 

and here thou mayest read the letter no iii 


 


to robert lovelace esq 
m hall wedn june 7 

cousin lovelace 

i think you might have found time to let us know of your nuptials being
actually solemnized i might have expected this piece of civility from
you but perhaps the ceremony was performed at the very time that you
asked me to be your lady's father but i should be angry if i proceed in
my guesses and little said is soon amended 

but i can tell you that lady betty lawrance whatever lady sarah does 
will not so soon forgive you as i have done women resent slights
longer than men you that know so much of the sex i speak it not 
however to your praise might have known that but never was you before
acquainted with a lady of such an amiable character i hope there will
be but one soul between you i have before now said that i will
disinherit you and settle all i can upon her if you prove not a good
husband to her 

may this marriage be crowned with a great many fine boys i desire no
girls to build up again a family so antient the first boy shall take
my surname by act of parliament that is my will 

lady betty and niece charlotte will be in town about business before you
know where you are they long to pay their compliments to your fair
bride i suppose you will hardly be at the lawn when they get to town 
because greme informs me you have sent no orders there for your lady's
accommodation 

pritchard has all things in readiness for signing i will take no
advantage of your slights indeed i am too much used to them more
praise to my patience than to your complaisance however 

one reason for lady betty's going up as i may tell you under the rose 
is to buy some suitable presents for lady sarah and all of us to make
on this agreeable occasion 

we would have blazed it away could we have had timely notice and
thought it would have been agreeable to all round the like occasions
don't happen every day 

my most affectionate compliments and congratulations to my new niece 
conclude me for the present in violent pain that with all your
heroicalness would make you mad 

your truly affectionate uncle 
m 


 


this letter clench'd the nail not but that miss rawlins said she saw
i had been a wild gentleman and truly she thought so the moment she
beheld me 

they began to intercede for my spouse so nicely had i turned the
tables and that i would not go abroad and disappoint a reconciliation
so much wished for on one side and such desirable prospects on the other
in my own family 

who knows thought i to myself but more may come of this plot than i
had even promised myself what a happy man shall i be if these women
can be brought to join to carry my marriage into consummation 

ladies you are exceedingly good to us both i should have some hopes 
if my unhappily nice spouse could be brought to dispense with the
unnatural oath she has laid me under you see what my case is do you
think i may not insist upon her absolving me from this abominable oath 
will you be so good as to give your advice that one apartment may serve
for a man and his wife at the hour of retirement  modestly put 
belford and let me here observe that few rakes would find a language
so decent as to engage modest women to talk with him in upon such
subjects  

they both simpered and looked upon one another 

these subjects always make women simper at least no need but of the
most delicate hints to them a man who is gross in a woman's company 
ought to be knocked down with a club for like so many musical
instruments touch but a single wire and the dear souls are sensible
all over 

to be sure miss rawlins learnedly said playing with her fan a casuist
would give it that the matrimonial vow ought to supercede any other
obligation 

mrs moore for her part was of opinion that if the lady owned herself
to be a wife she ought to behave like one 

whatever be my luck thought i with this all-eyed fair-one any other
woman in the world from fifteen to five-and-twenty would be mine upon
my own terms before the morning 

and now that i may be at hand to take all advantages i will endeavour 
said i to myself to make sure of good quarters 

i am your lodger mrs moore in virtue of the earnest i have given you
for these apartments and for any one you can spare above for my
servants indeed for all you have to spare for who knows what my
spouse's brother may attempt i will pay you to your own demand and
that for a month or two certain board included as i shall or shall
not be your hindrance take that as a pledge or in part of payment 
offering her a thirty pound bank note 

she declined taking it desiring she might consult the lady first 
adding that she doubted not my honour and that she would not let her
apartments to any other person whom she knew not something of while i
and the lady were here 

the lady the lady from both women's mouth's continually which still
implied a doubt in their hearts and not your spouse and your lady 
sir 

i never met with such women thought i so thoroughly convinced but this
moment yet already doubting i am afraid i have a couple of skeptics to
deal with 

i knew no reason i said for my wife to object to my lodging in the same
house with her here any more than in town at mrs sinclair's but were
she to make such objection i would not quit possession since it was not
unlikely that the same freakish disorder which brought her to hampstead 
might carry her absolutely out of my knowledge 

they both seemed embarrassed and looked upon one another yet with such
an air as if they thought there was reason in what i said and i
declared myself her boarder as well as lodger and dinner-time
approaching was not denied to be the former 



letter xxv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


i thought it was now high time to turn my whole mind to my beloved who
had had full leisure to weigh the contents of the letters i had left with
her 

i therefore requested mrs moore to step in and desire to know whether
she would be pleased to admit me to attend her in her apartment on
occasion of the letters i had left with her or whether she would favour
me with her company in the dining-room 

mrs moore desired miss rawlins to accompany her in to the lady they
tapped at the door and were both admitted 

i cannot but stop here for one minute to remark though against myself 
upon that security which innocence gives that nevertheless had better
have in it a greater mixture of the serpent with the dove for here 
heedless of all i could say behind her back because she was satisfied
with her own worthiness she permitted me to go on with my own story 
without interruption to persons as great strangers to her as me and
who as strangers to both might be supposed to lean to the side most
injured and that as i managed it was to mine a dear silly soul 
thought i at the time to depend upon the goodness of her own heart 
when the heart cannot be seen into but by its actions and she to
appearance a runaway an eloper from a tender a most indulgent
husband to neglect to cultivate the opinion of individuals when the
whole world is governed by appearance 

yet what can be expected of an angel under twenty she has a world of
knowledge knowledge speculative as i may say but no experience how
should she knowledge by theory only is a vague uncertain light a will
o' the wisp which as often misleads the doubting mind as puts it right 

there are many things in the world could a moralizer say that would
afford inexpressible pleasure to a reflecting mind were it not for the
mixture they come to us with to be graver still i have seen parents 
 perhaps my own did so   who delighted in those very qualities in their
children while young the natural consequences of which too much
indulged and encouraged made them as they grew up the plague of their
hearts to bring this home to my present purpose i must tell thee that
i adore this charming creature for her vigilant prudence but yet i would
not methinks wish her by virtue of that prudence which is however 
necessary to carry her above the devices of all the rest of the world to
be too wise for mine 

my revenge my sworn revenge is nevertheless adore her as i will 
uppermost in my heart miss howe says that my love is a herodian love 
by my soul that girl's a witch i am half sorry to say that i find a
pleasure in playing the tyrant over what i love call it an ungenerous
pleasure if thou wilt softer hearts than mine know it the women to a
woman know it and show it too whenever they are trusted with power 
and why should it be thought strange that i who love them so dearly 
and study them so much should catch the infection of them 


 see letter xx of this volume 



letter xxvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


i will now give thee the substance of the dialogue that passed between
the two women and the lady wonder not that a perverse wife makes a
listening husband the event however as thou wilt find justified the
old observation that listners seldom hear good of themselves conscious
of their own demerits if i may guess by myself  there's ingenuousness 
jack   and fearful of censure they seldom find themselves disappointed 
there is something of sense after all in these proverbs in these
phrases in this wisdom of nations 

mrs moore was to be the messenger but miss rawlins began the dialogue 

your spouse madam  devil only to fish for a negative or affirmative
declaration  

cl my spouse madam 

miss r mr lovelace madam avers that you are married to him and
begs admittance or your company in the dining-room to talk upon the
subject of the letters he left with you 

cl he is a poor wicked wretch let me beg of you madam to favour me
with your company as often as possible while he is hereabouts and i
remain here 

miss r i shall with pleasure attend you madam but methinks i could
wish you would see the gentleman and hear what he has to say on the
subject of the letters 

cl my case is a hard a very hard one i am quite bewildered -i know
not what to do i have not a friend in the world that can or will help
me yet had none but friends till i knew that man 

miss r the gentleman neither looks nor talks like a bad man not a
very bad man as men go 

as men go poor miss rawlins thought i and dost thou know how men go 

cl o madam you know him not he can put on the appearance of an
angel of light but has a black a very black heart 

poor i 

miss r i could not have thought it truly but men are very
deceitful now-a-days 

now-a-days a fool have not her history-books told her that they were
always so 

mrs moore sighing i have found it so i am sure to my cost 

who knows but in her time poor goody moore may have met with a lovelace 
or a belford or some such vile fellow my little harum-scarum beauty
knows not what strange histories every woman living who has had the
least independence of will could tell her were such to be as
communicative as she is but here's the thing i have given her cause
enough of offence but not enough to make her hold her tongue 

cl as to the letters he has left with me i know not what to say to
them but am resolved never to have any thing to say to him 

miss r if madam i may be allowed to say so i think you carry
matters very far 

cl has he been making a bad cause a good one with you madam that he
can do with those who know him not indeed i heard him talking thought
not what he said and am indifferent about it but what account does he
give of himself 

i was pleased to hear this to arrest to stop her passion thought i 
in the height of its career is a charming presage 

then the busy miss rawlins fished on to find out from her either a
confirmation or disavowal of my story was lord m my uncle did i court
her at first with the allowance of her friends her brother excepted 
had i a rencounter with that brother was she so persecuted in favour of
a very disagreeable man one solmes as to induce her to throw herself
into my protection 

none of these were denied all the objections she could have made were
stifled or kept in by the considerations as she mentioned that she
should stay there but a little while and that her story was too long 
but miss rawlins would not be thus easily answered 

miss r he says madam that he could not prevail for marriage till he
had consented under a solemn oath to separate beds while your family
remained unreconciled 

cl o the wretch what can be still in his head to endeavour to pass
these stories upon strangers 

so no direct denial thought i admirable all will do by-and-by 

miss r he has owned that an accidental fire had frightened you very
much on wednesday night and that and that an accidental fire had
frightened you very much frightened you last wednesday night 

then after a short pause in short he owned that he had taken some
innocent liberties which might have led to a breach of the oath you had
imposed upon him and that this was the cause of your displeasure 

i would have been glad to see how my charmer then looked to be sure she
was at a loss in her own mind to justify herself for resenting so highly
an offence so trifling she hesitated did not presently speak when
she did she wished that she miss rawlins might never meet with any
man who would take such innocent liberties with her 

miss rawlins pushed further 

your case to be sure madam is very particular but if the hope of a
reconciliation with your own friends is made more distant by your leaving
him give me leave to say that tis pity tis pity  i suppose the
maiden then primm'd fann'd and blush'd tis pity  the oath cannot be
dispensed with especially as he owns he has not been so strict a liver 

i could have gone in and kissed the girl 

cl you have heard his story mine as i told you before is too long 
and too melancholy my disorder on seeing the wretch is too great and my
time here is too short for me to enter upon it and if he has any end
to serve by his own vindication in which i shall not be a personal
sufferer let him make himself appear as white as an angel with all my
heart 

my love for her and the excellent character i gave her were then
pleaded 

cl specious seducer only tell me if i cannot get away from him by
some back way 

how my heart then went pit-a-pat to speak in the female dialect 

cl let me look out  i heard the sash lifted up   whither does that
path lead is there no possibility of getting to a coach surely he
must deal with some fiend or how could he have found me out cannot i
steal to some neighbouring house where i may be concealed till i can get
quite away you are good people i have not been always among such 
o help me help me ladies  with a voice of impatience   or i am ruined 

then pausing is that the way to hendon  pointing i suppose   is
hendon a private place the hampstead coach i am told will carry
passengers thither 

mrs moore i have an honest friend at mill-hill  devil fetch her 
thought i   where if such be your determination madam and if you think
yourself in danger you may be safe i believe 

cl any where if i can but escape from this man whither does that
path lead out yonder what is that town on the right hand called 

mrs moore highgate madam 

miss r on the side of the heath is a little village called north-end 
a kinswoman of mine lives there but her house is small i am not sure
she could accommodate such a lady 

devil take her too thought i i imagined that i had made myself a
better interest in these women but the whole sex love plotting and
plotters too jack 

cl a barn an outhouse a garret will be a palace to me if it will
but afford me a refuge from this man 

her senses thought i are much livelier than mine what a devil have
i done that she should be so very implacable i told thee belford all
i did was there any thing in it so very much amiss such prospects of a
family reconciliation before her too to be sure she is a very sensible
lady 

she then espied my new servant walking under the window and asked if he
were not one of mine 

will was on the look-out for old grimes  so is the fellow called whom
my beloved has dispatched to miss howe   and being told that the man she
saw was my servant i see said she that there is no escaping unless
you madam  to miss rawlins i suppose   can befriend me till i can get
farther i have no doubt that the fellow is planted about the house to
watch my steps but the wicked wretch his master has no right to
controul me he shall not hinder me from going where i please i will
raise the town upon him if he molests me dear ladies is there no
back-door for me to get out at while you hold him in talk 

miss r give me leave to ask you madam is there no room to hope for
accommodation had you not better see him he certainly loves you
dearly he is a fine gentleman you may exasperate him and make matters
more unhappy for yourself 

cl o mrs moore o miss rawlins you know not the man i wish not to
see his face nor to exchange another word with him as long as i live 

mrs moore i don't find miss rawlins that the gentleman has
misrepresented any thing you see madam  to my clarissa   how
respectful he is not to come in till permitted he certainly loves you
dearly pray madam let him talk to you as he wishes to do on the
subject of his letters 

very kind of mrs moore mrs moore thought i is a very good woman i
did not curse her then 

miss rawlins said something but so low that i could not hear what it
was thus it was answered 

cl i am greatly distressed i know not what to do but mrs moore 
be so good as to give his letters to him here they are be pleased to
tell him that i wish him and lady betty and miss montague a happy
meeting he never can want excuses to them for what has happened any
more than pretences to those he would delude tell him that he has
ruined me in the opinion of my own friends i am for that reason the
less solicitous how i appear to his 

mrs moore then came to me and i being afraid that something would pass
mean time between the other two which i should not like took the
letters and entered the room and found them retired into the closet my
beloved whispering with an air of earnestness to miss rawlins who was
all attention 

her back was towards me and miss rawlins by pulling her sleeve giving
intimation of my being there can i have no retirement uninvaded sir 
said she with indignation as if she were interrupted in some talk her
heart was in what business have you here or with me you have your
letters have you not 

lovel i have my dear and let me beg of you to consider what you are
about i every moment expect captain tomlinson here upon my soul i
do he has promised to keep from your uncle what has happened but what
will he think if he find you hold in this strange humour 

cl i will endeavour sir to have patience with you for a moment or
two while i ask you a few questions before this lady and before mrs 
moore  who just then came in   both of whom you have prejudiced in your
favour by your specious stories will you say sir that we are married
together lay your hand upon your heart and answer me am i your wedded
wife 

i am gone too far thought i to give up for such a push as this home
one as it is 

my dearest soul how can you put such a question it is either for your
honour or my own that it should be doubted surely surely madam you
cannot have attended to the contents of captain tomlinson's letter 

she complained often of want of spirits throughout our whole contention 
and of weakness of person and mind from the fits she had been thrown
into but little reason had she for this complaint as i thought who was
able to hold me to it as she did i own that i was excessively
concerned for her several times 

you and i vilest of men 

my name is lovelace madam 

therefore it is that i call you the vilest of men  was this pardonable 
jack   you and i know the truth the whole truth i want not to clear
up my reputation with these gentlewomen that is already lost with every
one i had most reason to value but let me have this new specimen of what
you are capable of say wretch say lovelace if thou hadst rather 
art thou really and truly my wedded husband say answer without
hesitation 

she trembled with impatient indignation but had a wildness in her
manner which i took some advantage of in order to parry this cursed
thrust and a cursed thrust it was since had i positively averred it 
she would never have believed any thing i said and had i owned that i
was not married i had destroyed my own plot as well with the women as
with her and could have no pretence for pursuing her or hindering her
from going wheresoever she pleased not that i was ashamed to aver it 
had it been consistent with policy i would not have thee think me such
a milk-sop neither 

lovel my dearest love how wildly you talk what would you have me
answer it is necessary that i should answer may i not re-appeal this
to your own breast as well as to captain tomlinson's treaty and letter 
you know yourself how matters stand between us and captain tomlinson 

cl o wretch is this an answer to my question say are we married 
or are we not 

lovel what makes a marriage we all know if it be the union of two
hearts  there was a turn jack   to my utmost grief i must say that we
are not since now i see you hate me if it be the completion of
marriage to my confusion and regret i must own we are not but my
dear will you be pleased to consider what answer half a dozen people
whence you came could give to your question and do not now in the
disorder of your mind and the height of passion bring into question
before these gentlewomen a point you have acknowledged before those who
know us better 

i would have whispered her about the treaty with her uncle and about the
contents of the captain's letter but retreating and with a rejecting
hand keep thy distance man cried the dear insolent to thine own heart
i appeal since thou evadest me thus pitifully i own no marriage with
thee bear witness ladies i do not and cease to torment me cease to
follow me surely surely faulty as i have been i have not deserved to
be thus persecuted i resume therefore my former language you have no
right to pursue me you know you have not begone then and leave me to
make the best of my hard lot o my dear cruel father said she in a
violent fit of grief  falling upon her knees and clasping her uplifted
hands together  thy heavy curse is completed upon thy devoted daughter 
i am punished dreadfully punished by the very wretch in whom i had
placed my wicked confidence 

by my soul belford the little witch with her words but more by her
manner moved me wonder not then that her action her grief her tears 
set the women into the like compassionate manifestations 

had i not a cursed task of it 

the two women withdrew to the further end of the room and whispered a
strange case there is no phrensy here i just heard said 

the charming creature threw her handkerchief over her head and neck 
continuing kneeling her back towards me and her face hid upon a chair 
and repeatedly sobbed with grief and passion 

i took this opportunity to step to the women to keep them steady 

you see ladies  whispering   what an unhappy man i am you see what a
spirit this dear creature has all all owing to her implacable
relations and to her father's curse a curse upon them all they have
turned the head of the most charming woman in the world 

ah sir sir replied miss rawlins whatever be the fault of her
relations all is not as it should be between you and her tis plain
she does not think herself married tis plain she does not and if you
have any value for the poor lady and would not totally deprive her of
her senses you had better withdraw and leave to time and cooler
consideration the event in your favour 

she will compel me to this at last i fear miss rawlins i fear she
will and then we are both undone for i cannot live without her she
knows it too well and she has not a friend who will look upon her this
also she knows our marriage when her uncle's friend comes will be
proved incontestably but i am ashamed to think i have given her room
to believe it no marriage that's what she harps upon 

well tis a strange case a very strange one said miss rawlins and was
going to say further when the angry beauty coming towards the door 
said mrs moore i beg a word with you and they both stepped into the
dining-room 

i saw her just before put a parcel into her pocket and followed them
out for fear she should slip away and stepping to the stairs that she
might not go by me will cried i aloud  though i knew he was not near 
 pray child to a maid who answered call either of my servants to me 

she then came up to me with a wrathful countenance do you call your
servant sir to hinder me between you from going where i please 

don't my dearest life misinterpret every thing i do can you think me
so mean and unworthy as to employ a servant to constrain you i call him
to send to the public-houses or inns in this town to inquire after
captain tomlinson who may have alighted at some one of them and be now 
perhaps needlessly adjusting his dress and i would have him come were
he to be without clothes god forgive me for i am stabbed to the heart
by your cruelty 

answer was returned that neither of my servants was in the way 

not in the way said i whither can the dogs be gone 

o sir with a scornful air not far i'll warrant one of them was under
the window just now according to order i suppose to watch my steps 
but i will do what i please and go where i please and that to your
face 

god forbid that i should hinder you in any thing that you may do with
safety to yourself 

now i verily believe that her design was to slip out in pursuance of the
closet-whispering between her and miss rawlins perhaps to miss rawlins's
house 

she then stept back to mrs moore and gave her something which proved
to be a diamond ring and desired her  not whisperingly but with an air
of defiance to me  that that might be a pledge for her till she defrayed
her demands which she should soon find means to do having no more money
about her than she might have occasion for before she came to an
acquaintance's 

mrs moore would have declined taking it but she would not be denied 
and then wiping her eyes she put on her gloves nobody has a right to
stop me said she i will go whom should i be afraid of her very
question charming creature testifying her fear 

i beg pardon madam  turning to mrs moore and courtesying   for the
trouble i have given you i beg pardon madam to miss rawlins 
 courtesying likewise to her   you may both hear of me in a happier
hour if such a one fall to my lot and god bless you both struggling
with her tears till she sobbed and away was tripping 

i stepped to the door i put it to and setting my back against it took
her struggling hand my dearest life my angel said i why will you thus
distress me is this the forgiveness which you so solemnly promised 

unhand me sir you have no business with me you have no right over
me you know you have not 

but whither whither my dearest love would you go think you not that
i will follow you were it to the world's end whither would you go 

well do you ask me whither i would go who have been the occasion that i
have not a friend left but god who knows my innocence and my upright
intentions will not wholly abandon me when i am out of your power but
while i am in it i cannot expect a gleam of the divine grace or favour
to reach me 

how severe is this how shockingly severe out of your presence my
angry fair-one i can neither hope for the one nor the other as my
cousin montague in the letter you have read observes you are my polar
star and my guide and if ever i am to be happy either here or
hereafter it must be in and by you 

she would then have opened the door but i respectfully opposing her 
begone man begone mr lovelace said she stop not in my way if you
would not that i should attempt the window give me passage by the door 
for once more you have no right to detain me 

your resentments my dearest life i will own to be well grounded i
will acknowledge that i have been all in fault on my knee  and down i
dropt   i ask your pardon and can you refuse to ratify your own
promise look forward to the happy prospect before us see you not my
lord m and lady sarah longing to bless you for blessing me and their
whole family can you take no pleasure in the promised visit of lady
betty and my cousin montague and in the protection they offer you if
you are dissatisfied with mine have you no wish to see your uncle's
friend stay only till captain tomlinson comes receive from him the
news of your uncle's compliance with the wishes of both 

she seemed altogether distressed was ready to sink and forced to lean
against the wainscot as i kneeled at her feet a stream of tears at
last burst from her less indignant eyes good heaven said she lifting
up her lovely face and clasped hands what is at last to be my destiny 
deliver me from this dangerous man and direct me i know not what to do 
what i can do nor what i ought to do 

the women as i had owned our marriage to be but half completed heard
nothing in this whole scene to contradict not flagrantly to contradict 
what i had asserted they believed they saw in her returning temper and
staggered resolution a love for me which her indignation had before
suppressed and they joined to persuade her to tarry till the captain
came and to hear his proposals representing the dangers to which she
would be exposed the fatigues she might endure a lady of her
appearance unguarded unprotected on the other hand they dwelt upon my
declared contrition and on my promises for the performance of which
they offered to be bound so much had my kneeling humility affected
them 

women jack tacitly acknowledge the inferiority of their sex in the
pride they take to behold a kneeling lover at their feet 

she turned from me and threw herself into a chair 

i arose and approached her with reverence my dearest creature said i 
and was proceeding but with a face glowing with conscious dignity she
interrupted me ungenerous ungrateful lovelace you know not the value
of the heart you have insulted nor can you conceive how much my soul
despises your meanness but meanness must ever be the portion of the
man who can act vilely 

the women believing we were likely to be on better terms retired the
dear perverse opposed their going but they saw i was desirous of their
absence and when they had withdrawn i once more threw myself at her
feet and acknowledged my offences implored her forgiveness for this one
time and promised the most exact circumspection for the future 

it was impossible for her she said to keep her memory and forgive me 
what hadst thou seen in the conduct of clarissa harlowe that should
encourage such an insult upon her as thou didst dare to make how meanly
must thou think of her that thou couldst presume to be so guilty and
expect her to be so weak as to forgive thee 

i besought her to let me read over to her captain tomlinson's letter i
was sure it was impossible she could have given it the requisite
attention 

i have given it the requisite attention said she and the other letters
too so that what i say is upon deliberation and what have i to fear
from my brother and sister they can but complete the ruin of my
fortunes with my father and uncles let them and welcome you sir i
thank you have lowered my fortunes but i bless god that my mind is
not sunk with my fortunes it is on the contrary raised above fortune 
and above you and for half a word they shall have the estate they envied
me for and an acquittal from me of all the expectations from my family
that may make them uneasy 

i lifted up my hands and eyes in silent admiration of her 

my brother sir may think me ruined to the praise of your character he
may think it impossible to be with you and be innocent you have but too
well justified their harshest censures by every part of your conduct 
but now that i have escaped from you and that i am out of the reach of
your mysterious devices i will wrap myself up in mine own innocence 
 and then the passionate beauty folded her arms about herself   and leave
to time and to my future circumspection the re-establishment of my
character leave me then sir pursue me not 

good heaven  interrupting her  and all this for what had i not
yielded to your entreaties forgive me madam you could not have
carried farther your resentments 

wretch was it not crime enough to give occasion for those entreaties 
wouldst thou make a merit to me that thou didst not utterly ruin her
whom thou oughtest to have protected begone man turning from me her
face crimsoned over with passion see me no more i cannot bear thee
in my sight 

dearest dearest creature 

if i forgive thee lovelace and there she stopped to endeavour 
proceeded she to endeavour by premeditation by low contrivances by
cries of fire to terrify a poor creature who had consented to take a
wretched chance with thee for life 

for heaven's sake offering to take her repulsing hand as she was
flying from me towards the closet 

what hast thou to do to plead for the sake of heaven in thy favour o
darkest of human minds 

then turning from me wiping her eyes and again turning towards me but
her sweet face half aside what difficulties hast thou involved me in 
that thou hadst a plain path before thee after thou hadst betrayed me
into thy power at once my mind takes in the whole of thy crooked
behaviour and if thou thinkest of clarissa harlowe as her proud heart
tells her thou oughtest to think of her thou wilt seek thy fortunes
elsewhere how often hast thou provoked me to tell thee that my soul
is above thee 

for heaven's sake madam for a soul's sake which it is in your power
to save from perdition forgive me the past offence i am the greatest
villain on earth if it was a premeditated one yet i presume not to
excuse myself on your mercy i throw myself i will not offer at any
plea but that of penitence see but captain tomlinson see but lady
betty and my cousin let them plead for me let them be guarantees for
my honour 

if captain tomlinson come while i stay here i may see him but as for
you sir 

dearest creature let me beg of you not to aggravate my offence to the
captain when he comes let me beg of you 

what askest thou it is not that i shall be of party against myself 
that i shall palliate 

do not charge me madam interrupted i with villainous premeditation 
 do not give such a construction to my offence as may weaken your
uncle's opinion as may strengthen your brother's 

she flung from me to the further end of the room  she could go no
further   and just then mrs moore came up and told her that dinner was
ready and that she had prevailed upon miss rawlins to give her her
company 

you must excuse me mrs moore said she miss rawlins i hope also will
 but i cannot eat i cannot go down as for you sir i suppose you
will think it right to depart hence at least till the gentleman comes
whom you expect 

i respectfully withdrew into the next room that mrs moore might
acquaint her i durst not myself that i was her lodger and boarder 
as whisperingly i desired that she would and meeting miss rawlins in
the passage dearest miss rawlins said i stand my friend join with mrs 
moore to pacify my spouse if she has any new flights upon my having
taken lodgings and intending to board here i hope she will have more
generosity than to think of hindering a gentlewoman from letting her
lodgings 

i suppose mrs moore whom i left with my fair-one had apprized her of
this before miss rawlins went in for i heard her say while i withheld
miss rawlins no indeed he is much mistaken surely he does not think
i will 

they both expostulated with her as i could gather from bits and scraps
of what they said for they spoke so low that i could not hear any
distinct sentence but from the fair perverse whose anger made her
louder and to this purpose i heard her deliver herself in answer to
different parts of their talk to her good mrs moore dear miss
rawlins press me no further i cannot sit down at table with him 

they said something as i suppose in my behalf o the insinuating
wretch what defence have i against a man who go where i will can
turn every one even of the virtuous of my sex in his favour 

after something else said which i heard not distinctly this is
execrable cunning were you to know his wicked heart he is not without
hope of engaging you two good persons to second him in the vilest of his
machinations 

how came she thought i at the instant by all this penetration my
devil surely does not play me booty if i thought he did i would marry 
and live honest to be even with him 

i suppose then they urged the plea which i hinted to miss rawlins at
going in that she would not be mrs moore's hindrance for thus she
expressed herself he will no doubt pay you your own price you need
not question his liberality but one house cannot hold us why if it
would did i fly from him to seek refuge among strangers 

then in answer to somewhat else they pleaded 'tis a mistake madam 
i am not reconciled to him i will believe nothing he says has he not
given you a flagrant specimen of what a man he is and of what his is
capable by the disguises you saw him in my story is too long and my
stay here will be but short or i could convince you that my resentments
against him are but too well founded 

i suppose that they pleaded for her leave for my dining with them for
she said i have nothing to say to that it is your own house mrs 
moore it is your own table you may admit whom you please to it only
leave me at my liberty to choose my company 

then in answer as i suppose to their offer of sending her up a plate 
a bit of bread if you please and a glass of water that's all i can
swallow at present i am really very much discomposed saw you not how
bad i was indignation only could have supported my spirits 

i have no objections to his dining with you madam  added she in
reply i suppose to a farther question of the same nature but i will
not stay a night in the same house where he lodges 

i presume miss rawlins had told her that she would not stay dinner for
she said let me not deprive mrs moore of your company miss rawlins 
you will not be displeased with his talk he can have no design upon
you 

then i suppose they pleaded what i might say behind her back to make my
own story good i care not what he says or what he thinks of me 
repentance and amendment are all the harm i wish him whatever becomes of
me 

by her accent she wept when she spoke these last words 

they came out both of them wiping their eyes and would have persuaded me
to relinquish the lodgings and to depart till her uncle's friend came 
but i knew better i did not care to trust the devil well as she and
miss howe suppose me to be acquainted with him for finding her out
again if once more she escaped me 

what i am most afraid of is that she will throw herself among her own
relations and if she does i am confident they will not be able to
withstand her affecting eloquence but yet as thou'lt see the
captain's letter to me is admirably calculated to obviate my
apprehensions on this score particularly in that passage where it is
said that her uncle thinks not himself at liberty to correspond directly
with her or to receive applications from her but through captain
tomlinson as is strongly implied 


 see letter xxiv of this volume 


i must own notwithstanding the revenge i have so solemnly vowed that
i would very fain have made for her a merit with myself in her returning
favour and have owed as little as possible to the mediation of captain
tomlinson my pride was concerned in this and this was one of my
reasons for not bringing him with me another was that if i were
obliged to have recourse to his assistance i should be better able by
visiting without him to direct him what to say or do as i should find
out the turn of her humour 

i was however glad at my heart that mrs moore came up so seasonably
with notice that dinner was ready the fair fugitive was all in all 
she had the excuse for withdrawing i had time to strengthen myself the
captain had time to come and the lady to cool shakspeare advises
well 

 oppose not rage whilst rage is in its force 
 but give it way awhile and let it waste 
 the rising deluge is not stopt with dams 
 those it o'erbears and drowns the hope of harvest 
 but wisely manag'd its divided strength
 is sluic'd in channels and securely drain'd 
 and when its force is spent and unsupply'd 
 the residue with mounds may be restrain'd 
 and dry-shod we may pass the naked ford 

i went down with the women to dinner mrs moore sent her fair boarder
up a plate but she only ate a little bit of bread and drank a glass of
water i doubted not but she would keep her word when it was once gone
out is she not an harlowe she seems to be enuring herself to
hardships which at the worst she can never know since though she
should ultimately refuse to be obliged to me or to express myself more
suitable to my own heart to oblige me every one who sees her must
befriend her 

but let me ask thee belford art thou not solicitous for me in relation
to the contents of the letter which the angry beauty had written and
dispatched away by man and horse and for what may be miss howe's answer
to it art thou not ready to inquire whether it be not likely that miss
howe when she knows of her saucy friend's flight will be concerned
about her letter which she must know could not be at wilson's till after
that flight and so probably would fall into my hands 

all these things as thou'lt see in the sequel are provided for with as
much contrivance as human foresight can admit 

i have already told thee that will is upon the lookout for old grimes 
old grimes is it seems a gossiping sottish rascal and if will can
but light of him i'll answer for the consequence for has not will been
my servant upwards of seven years 



letter xxvii

mr lovelace
 in continuation  


we had at dinner besides miss rawlins a young widow-niece of mrs 
moore who is come to stay a month with her aunt bevis her name very
forward very lively and a great admirer of me i assure you hanging
smirkingly upon all i said and prepared to approve of every word before
i spoke and who by the time we had half-dined by the help of what she
had collected before was as much acquainted with our story as either of
the other two 

as it behoved me to prepare them in my favour against whatever might come
from miss howe i improved upon the hint i had thrown out above-stairs
against that mischief-making lady i represented her to be an arrogant
creature revengeful artful enterprising and one who had she been a
man would have sworn and cursed and committed rapes and played the
devil as far as i knew  i have no doubt of it jack   but who by
advantage of a female education and pride and insolence i believed was
personally virtuous 

mrs bevis allowed that there was a vast deal in education and in
pride too she said while miss rawlins came with a prudish god forbid
that virtue should be owing to education only however i declared that
miss howe was a subtle contriver of mischief one who had always been my
enemy her motives i knew not but despised the man whom her mother was
desirous she should have one hickman although i did not directly aver
that she would rather have had me yet they all immediately imagined that
that was the ground of her animosity to me and of her envy to my
beloved and it was pity they said that so fine a young lady did not
see through such a pretended friend 

and yet nobody  added i  has more reason than she to know by experience
the force of a hatred founded in envy as i hinted to you above mrs 
moore and to you miss rawlins in the case of her sister arabella 

i had compliments made to my person and talents on this occasion which
gave me a singular opportunity of displaying my modesty by disclaiming
the merit of them with a no indeed i should be very vain ladies if
i thought so while thus abusing myself and exalting miss howe i got
their opinion both for modesty and generosity and had all the graces
which i disclaimed thrown in upon me besides 

in short they even oppressed that modesty which to speak modestly of
myself their praises created by disbelieving all i said against myself 

and truly i must needs say they have almost persuaded even me myself 
that miss howe is actually in love with me i have often been willing to
hope this and who knows but she may the captain and i have agreed 
that it shall be so insinuated occasionally and what's thy opinion 
jack she certainly hates hickman and girls who are disengaged seldom
hate though they may not love and if she had rather have another why
not that other me for am i not a smart fellow and a rake and do not
your sprightly ladies love your smart fellow and your rakes and where
is the wonder that the man who could engage the affections of miss
harlowe should engage those of a lady with her alas's who would be
honoured in being deemed her second 


 see letter xx of this volume where miss howe says alas my dear i
know you loved him 


nor accuse thou me of singular vanity in this presumption belford wert
thou to know the secret vanity that lurks in the hearts of those who
disguise or cloke it best thou wouldst find great reason to acquit at
least to allow for me since it is generally the conscious over-fulness
of conceit that makes the hypocrite most upon his guard to conceal it 
yet with these fellows proudly humble as they are it will break out
sometimes in spite of their clokes though but in self-denying 
compliment-begging self-degradation 

but now i have undervalued myself in apologizing to thee on this
occasion let me use another argument in favour of my observation that
the ladies generally prefer a rake to a sober man and of my presumption
upon it that miss howe is in love with me it is this common fame says 
that hickman is a very virtuous a very innocent fellow a male-virgin i
warrant an odd dog i always thought him now women jack like not
novices two maidenheads meeting together in wedlock the first child
must be a fool is their common aphorism they are pleased with a love
of the sex that is founded in the knowledge of it reason good novices
expect more than they can possibly find in the commerce with them the
man who knows them yet has ardours for them to borrow a word from miss
howe though those ardours are generally owing more to the devil within
him than to the witch without him is the man who makes them the highest
and most grateful compliment he knows what to expect and with what to
be satisfied 


 see vol iv letters xxix and xxxiv 


then the merit of a woman in some cases must be ignorance whether real
or pretended the man in these cases must be an adept will it then
be wondered at that a woman prefers a libertine to a novice while she
expects in the one the confidence she wants she considers the other and
herself as two parallel lines which though they run side by side can
never meet 

yet in this the sex is generally mistaken too for these sheepish fellows
are sly i myself was modest once and this as i have elsewhere hinted
to thee has better enabled me to judge of both sexes 


 see vol iii letter xxiii 


but to proceed with my narrative 

having thus prepared every one against any letter should come from miss
howe and against my beloved's messenger returns i thought it proper to
conclude that subject with a hint that my spouse could not bear to have
any thing said that reflected upon miss howe and with a deep sigh 
added that i had been made very unhappy more than once by the ill-will
of ladies whom i had never offended 

the widow bevis believed that might very easily be will both without
and within  for i intend he shall fall in love with widow moore's maid 
and have saved one hundred pounds in my service at least   will be great
helps as things may happen 



letter xxviii

mr lovelace
 in continuation  


we had hardly dined when my coachman who kept a look-out for captain
tomlinson as will did for old grimes conducted hither that worthy
gentleman attended by one servant both on horseback he alighted i
went out to meet him at the door 

thou knowest his solemn appearance and unblushing freedom and yet canst
not imagine what a dignity the rascal assumed nor how respectful to him
i was 

i led him into the parlour and presented him to the women and them to
him i thought it highly imported me as they might still have some
diffidences about our marriage from my fair-one's home-pushed questions
on that head to convince them entirely of the truth of all i had
asserted and how could i do this better than by dialoguing a little
with him before them 

dear captain i thought you long for i have had a terrible conflict with
my spouse 

capt i am sorry that i am later than my intention my account with my
banker  there's a dog jack   took me up longer time to adjust than i
had foreseen  all the time pulling down and stroking his ruffles  for
there was a small difference between us only twenty pounds indeed 
which i had taken no account of 

the rascal has not seen twenty pounds of his own these ten years 

then had we between us the character of the harlowe family i railed
against them all the captain taking his dear friend mr john harlowe's
part with a not so fast not so fast young gentleman and the like
free assumptions 

he accounted for their animosity by my defiances no good family having
such a charming daughter would care to be defied instead of courted he
must speak his mind never was a double-tongued man he appealed to the
ladies if he were not right 

he got them on his side 

the correction i had given the brother he told me must have aggravated
matters 

how valiant this made me look to the women the sex love us mettled
fellows at their hearts 

be that as it would i should never love any of the family but my spouse 
and wanting nothing from them i would not but for her sake have gone
so far as i had gone towards a reconciliation 

this was very good of me mrs moore said 

very good indeed miss rawlins 

good it is more than good it is very generous said the widow 

capt why so it is i must needs say for i am sensible that mr 
lovelace has been rudely treated by them all more rudely than it could
have been imagined a man of his quality and spirit would have put up
with but then sir  turning to me   i think you are amply rewarded in
such a lady and that you ought to forgive the father for the daughter's
sake 

mrs moore indeed so i think 

miss r so must every one think who has seen the lady 

widow b a fine lady to be sure but she has a violent spirit and
some very odd humours too by what i have heard the value of good
husbands is not known till they are lost 

her conscience then drew a sigh from her 

lovel nobody must reflect upon my angel an angel she is some little
blemishes indeed as to her over-hasty spirit and as to her unforgiving
temper but this she has from the harlowes instigated too by that miss
howe but her innumerable excellencies are all her own 

capt ay talk of spirit there's a spirit now you have named miss
howe  and so i led him to confirm all i had said of that vixen   yet
she was to be pitied too looking with meaning at me 

as i have already hinted i had before agreed with him to impute secret
love occasionally to miss howe as the best means to invalidate all that
might come from her in my disfavour 

capt mr lovelace but that i know your modesty or you could give a
reason 

lovel looking down and very modest i can't think so captain but
let us call another cause 

every woman present could look me in the face so bashful was i 

capt well but as to our present situation only it mayn't be proper 
looking upon me and round upon the women 

lovel o captain you may say any thing before this company only 
andrew  to my new servant who attended us at table   do you withdraw 
this good girl  looking at the maid-servant  will help us to all we want 

away went andrew he wanted not his cue and the maid seemed pleased at
my honour's preference of her 

capt as to our present situation i say mr lovelace why sir we
shall be all untwisted let me tell you if my friend mr john harlowe
were to know what that is he would as much question the truth of your
being married as the rest of the family do 

here the women perked up their ears and were all silent attention 

capt i asked you before for particulars mr lovelace but you
declined giving them indeed it may not be proper for me to be
acquainted with them but i must own that it is past my comprehension 
that a wife can resent any thing a husband can do that is not a breach
of the peace so far as to think herself justified for eloping from him 

lovel captain tomlinson sir i do assure you that i shall be
offended i shall be extremely concerned if i hear that word eloping
mentioned again 

capt your nicety and your love sir may make you take offence but it
is my way to call every thing by its proper name let who will be
offended 

thou canst not imagine belford how brave and how independent the rascal
looked 

capt when young gentleman you shall think proper to give us
particulars we will find a word for this rash act in so admirable a
lady that shall please you better you see sir that being the
representative of my dear friend mr john harlowe i speak as freely as i
suppose he would do if present but you blush sir i beg your pardon 
mr lovelace it becomes not a modest man to pry into those secrets 
which a modest man cannot reveal 

i did not blush jack but denied not the compliment and looked down 
the women seemed delighted with my modesty but the widow bevis was more
inclined to laugh at me than praise me for it 

capt whatever be the cause of this step i will not again sir call
it elopement since that harsh word wounds your tenderness i cannot but
express my surprise upon it when i recollect the affectionate behaviour 
to which i was witness between you when i attended you last over-love 
sir i think you once mention but over-love  smiling  give me leave to
say sir it is an odd cause of quarrel few ladies 

lovel dear captain and i tried to blush 

the women also tried and being more used to it succeeded better mrs 
bevis indeed has a red-hot countenance and always blushes 

miss r it signifies nothing to mince the matter but the lady above as
good as denies her marriage you know sir that she does turning to
me 

capt denies her marriage heavens how then have i imposed upon my
dear friend mr john harlowe 

lovel poor dear but let not her veracity be called into question 
she would not be guilty of a wilful untruth for the world 

then i had all their praises again 

lovel dear creature she thinks she has reason for her denial you
know mrs moore you know miss rawlins what i owned to you above as my
vow 

i looked down and as once before turned round my diamond ring 

mrs moore looked awry and with a leer at miss rawlins as to her
partner in the hinted-at reference 

miss rawlins looked down as well as i her eyelids half closed as if
mumbling a pater-noster meditating her snuff-box the distance between
her nose and chin lengthened by a close-shut mouth 

she put me in mind of the pious mrs fetherstone at oxford whom i
pointed out to thee once among other grotesque figures at st mary's
church whither we went to take a view of her two sisters her eyes shut 
not daring to trust her heart with them open and but just half-rearing
her lids to see who the next comer was and falling them again when her
curiosity was satisfied 

the widow bevis gazed as if on the hunt for a secret 

the captain looked archly as if half in the possession of one 

mrs moore at last broke the bashful silence mrs lovelace's behaviour 
she said could be no otherwise so well accounted for as by the ill
offices of that miss howe and by the severity of her relations which
might but too probably have affected her head a little at times adding 
that it was very generous in me to give way to the storm when it was up 
rather than to exasperate at such a time 

but let me tell you sirs said the widow bevis that is not what one
husband in a thousand would have done 

i desired that no part of this conversation might be hinted to my
spouse and looked still more bashfully her great fault i must own 
was over-delicacy 

the captain leered round him and said he believed he could guess from
the hints i had given him in town of my over-love and from what had now
passed that we had not consummated our marriage 

o jack how sheepishly then looked or endeavoured to look thy friend 
how primly goody moore how affectedly miss rawlins while the honest
widow bevis gazed around her fearless and though only simpering with her
mouth her eyes laughed outright and seemed to challenge a laugh from
every eye in the company 

he observed that i was a phoenix of a man if so and he could not but
hope that all matters would be happily accommodated in a day or two and
that then he should have the pleasure to aver to her uncle that he was
present as he might say on our wedding-day 

the women seemed all to join in the same hope 

ah captain ah ladies how happy should i be if i could bring my dear
spouse to be of the same mind 

it would be a very happy conclusion of a very knotty affair said the
widow bevis and i see not why we may not make this very night a merry
one 

the captain superciliously smiled at me he saw plainly enough he said 
that we had been at children's play hitherto a man of my character who
could give way to such a caprice as this must have a prodigious value
for his lady but one thing he would venture to tell me and that was
this that however desirous young skittish ladies might be to have their
way in this particular it was a very bad setting-out for the man as it
gave his bride a very high proof of the power she had over him and he
would engage that no woman thus humoured ever valued the man the more
for it but very much the contrary and there were reasons to be given
why she should not 

well well captain no more of this subject before the ladies one
feels  shrugging my shoulders in a bashful try-to-blush manner  that one
is so ridiculous i have been punished enough for my tender folly 

miss rawlins had taken her fan and would needs hide her face behind it 
i suppose because her blush was not quite ready 

mrs moore hemmed and looked down and by that gave her's over 

while the jolly widow laughing out praised the captain as one of
hudibras's metaphysicians repeating 

 he knew what's what and that's as high
 as metaphysic wit can fly 

this made miss rawlins blush indeed fie fie mrs bevis cried she 
unwilling i suppose to be thought absolutely ignorant 

upon the whole i began to think that i had not made a bad exchange of
our professing mother for the unprofessing mrs moore and indeed the
women and i and my beloved too all mean the same thing we only differ
about the manner of coming at the proposed end 



letter xxix

mr lovelace
 in continuation  


it was now high time to acquaint my spouse that captain tomlinson was
come and the rather as the maid told us that the lady had asked her
if such a gentleman  describing him  was not in the parlour 

mrs moore went up and requested in my name that she would give us
audience 

but she returned reporting my beloved's desire that captain tomlinson
would excuse her for the present she was very ill her spirits were
too weak to enter into conversation with him and she must lie down 

i was vexed and at first extremely disconcerted the captain was vexed
too and my concern thou mayest believe was the greater on his
account 

she had been very much fatigued i own her fits in the morning must
have disordered her and she had carried her resentment so high that it
was the less wonder she should find herself low when her raised spirits
had subsided very low i may say if sinkings are proportioned to
risings for she had been lifted up above the standard of a common
mortal 

the captain however sent up his own name that if he could be admitted
to drink one dish of tea with her he should take it for a favour and
would go to town and dispatch some necessary business in order if
possible to leave his morning free to attend her 

but she pleaded a violent head-ache and mrs moore confirmed the plea to
be just 

i would have had the captain lodge there that night as well in
compliment to him as introductory to my intention of entering myself
upon my new-taken apartment but his hours were of too much importance to
him to stay the evening 

it was indeed very inconvenient for him he said to return in the
morning but he is willing to do all in his power to heal this breach 
and that as well for the sakes of me and my lady as for that of his dear
friend mr john harlowe who must not know how far this misunderstanding
had gone he would therefore only drink one dish of tea with the ladies
and me 

and accordingly after he had done so and i had had a little private
conversation with him he hurried away 

his fellow had given him in the interim a high character to mrs 
moore's servants and this reported by the widow bevis who being no
proud woman is hail fellow well met as the saying is with all her
aunt's servants he was a fine gentleman a discreet gentleman a man of
sense and breeding with them all and it was pity that with such great
business upon his hands he should be obliged to come again 

my life for your's audibly whispered the widow bevis there is humour as
well as head-ache in somebody's declining to see this worthy gentleman 
ah lord how happy might some people be if they would 

no perfect happiness in this world said i very gravely and with a
sigh for the widow must know that i heard her if we have not real
unhappiness we can make it even from the overflowings of our good
fortune 

very true and very true the two widows a charming observation mrs 
bevis miss rawlins smiled her assent to it and i thought she called me
in her heart charming man for she professes to be a great admirer of
moral observations 

i had hardly taken leave of the captain and sat down again with the
women when will came and calling me out sir sir  said he grinning
with a familiarity in his looks as if what he had to say entitled him to
take liberties i have got the fellow down i have got old grimes hah 
hah hah hah he is at the lower flask almost in the condition of
david's sow and please your honour  the dog himself not much better 
here is his letter from from miss howe ha ha ha ha  laughed the
varlet holding it fast as if to make conditions with me and to excite
my praises as well as my impatience 

i could have knocked him down but he would have his say out old grimes
knows not that i have the letter i must get back to him before he misses
it i only make a pretence to go out for a few minutes but but' and
then the dog laughed again he must stay old grimes must stay till i
go back to pay the reckoning 

d n the prater grinning rascal the letter the letter 

he gathered in his wide mothe as he calls it and gave me the letter 
but with a strut rather than a bow and then sidled off like one of
widow sorlings's dunghill cocks exulting after a great feat performed 
and all the time that i was holding up the billet to the light to try to
get at its contents without breaking the seal  for dispatched in a
hurry it had no cover   there stood he laughing shrugging playing off
his legs now stroking his shining chin now turning his hat upon his
thumb then leering in my face flourishing with his head o christ 
now-and-then cried the rascal 

what joy has this dog in mischief more than i can have in the
completion of my most favourite purposes these fellows are ever happier
than their masters 

i was once thinking to rumple up this billet till i had broken the seal 
young families  miss howe's is not an ancient one  love ostentatious
sealings and it might have been supposed to have been squeezed in pieces
in old grimes's breeches-pocket but i was glad to be saved the guilt as
well as suspicion of having a hand in so dirty a trick for thus much of
the contents enough for my purpose i was enabled to scratch out in
character without it the folds depriving me only of a few connecting
words which i have supplied between hooks 

my miss harlowe thou knowest had before changed her name to miss
laetitia beaumont another alias now jack to it for this billet was
directed to her by the name of mrs harriot lucas i have learned her to
be half a rogue thou seest 


i congratulate you my dear with all my heart and soul upon  your
escape  from the villain  i long  for the particulars of all  my
mother  is out but expecting her return every minute i dispatched
 your  messenger instantly  i will endeavour to come at  mrs townsend
without loss of time and will write at large in a day or two if in that
time i can see her  mean time i  am excessively uneasy for a letter i
sent you yesterday by collins  who must have left it at  wilson's after
you got away  it is of very  great importance  i hope the  villain
has it not i would not for the world  that he should   immediately
send for it if by doing so the place you are at  will not be 
discovered if he has it let me know it by some way  out of  hand if
not you need not send 

ever ever your's 
a h 
june 9 


 


o jack what heart's-ease does this interception give me i sent the
rascal back with the letter to old grimes and charged him to drink no
deeper he owned that he was half-seas over as he phrased it 

dog said i are you not to court one of mrs moore's maids to-night 

cry your mercy sir i will be sober i had forgot that but old grimes
is plaguy tough i thought i should never have got him down 

away villain let old grimes come and on horseback too to the door 

he shall and please your honour if i can get him on the saddle and if
he can sit 

and charge him not to have alighted nor to have seen any body 

enough sir familiarly nodding his head to show he took me and away
went the villain into the parlour to the women i 

in a quarter of an hour came old grimes on horseback waving to his
saddle-bow now on this side now on that his head at others joining
to that of his more sober beast 

it looked very well to the women that i made no effort to speak to old
grimes though i wished before them that i knew the contents of what
he brought but on the contrary desired that they would instantly let
my spouse know that her messenger was returned 

down she flew violently as she had the head-ache 

o how i prayed for an opportunity to be revenged of her for the
ungrateful trouble she had given to her uncle's friend 

she took the letter from old grimes with her own hands and retired to an
inner parlour to read it 

she presently came out again to the fellow who had much ado to sit his
horse here is your money friend i thought you long but what shall i
do to get somebody to go to town immediately for me i see you cannot 

old grimes took his money let fall his hat in doffing it had it given
him and rode away his eyes isinglass and set in his head as i saw
through the window and in a manner speechless all his language hiccup 
my dog needed not to have gone so deep with this tough old grimes but
the rascal was in his kingdom with him 

the lady applied to mrs moore she mattered not the price could a man
and horse be engaged for her only to go for a letter left for her at
one mr wilson's in pall-mall 

a poor neighbour was hired a horse procured for him he had his
directions 

in vain did i endeavour to engaged my beloved when she was below her
head-ache i suppose returned she like the rest of her sex can be
ill or well when she pleases 

i see her drift thought i it is to have all her lights from miss howe
before she resolves and to take her measures accordingly 

up she went expressing great impatience about the letter she had sent
for and desired mrs moore to let her know if i offered to send any one
of my servants to town to get at the letter i suppose was her fear 
but she might have been quite easy on that head and yet perhaps would
not had she known that the worthy captain tomlinson who will be in
town before her messenger will leave there the important letter which
i hope will help to pacify her and reconcile her to me 

o jack jack thinkest thou that i will take all this roguish pains and
be so often called villain for nothing 

but yet is it not taking pains to come at the finest creature in the
world not for a transitory moment only but for one of our lives the
struggle only whether i am to have her in my own way or in her's 

but now i know thou wilt be frightened out of thy wits for me what 
lovelace wouldest thou let her have a letter that will inevitably blow
thee up and blow up the mother and all her nymphs yet not intend to
reform nor intend to marry 

patience puppy canst thou not trust thy master 



letter xxx

mr lovelace
 in continuation  


i went up to my new-taken apartment and fell to writing in character as
usual i thought i had made good my quarters but the cruel creature 
understanding that i intended to take up my lodgings there declared with
so much violence against it that i was obliged to submit and to accept
of another lodging about twelve doors off which mrs moore recommended 
and all the advantage i could obtain was that will unknown to my
spouse and for fear of a freak should lie in the house 

mrs moore indeed was unwilling to disoblige either of us but miss
rawlins was of opinion that nothing more ought to be allowed me and yet
mrs moore owned that the refusal was a strange piece of tyranny to a
husband if i were a husband 

i had a good mind to make miss rawlins smart for it come and see miss
rawlins jack if thou likest her i'll get her for thee with a
wet-finger as the saying is 

the widow bevis indeed stickled hard for me  an innocent or injured
man will have friends every where   she said that to bear much with
some wives was to be obliged to bear more and i reflected with a sigh 
that tame spirits must always be imposed upon and then in my heart i
renewed my vows of revenge upon this haughty and perverse beauty 

the second fellow came back from town about nine o'clock with miss
howe's letter of wednesday last collins it seems when he left it 
had desired that it might be safely and speedily delivered into miss
laetitia beaumont's own hands but wilson understanding that neither
she nor i were in town  he could not know of our difference thou must
think   resolved to take care of it till our return in order to give it
into one of our own hands and now delivered it to her messenger 

this was told her wilson i doubt not is in her favour upon it 

she took the letter with great eagerness opened it in a hurry  am glad
she did yet i believe all was right   before mrs moore and mrs 
bevis  miss rawlins was gone home   and said she would not for the
world that i should have had that letter for the sake of her dear friend
the writer who had written to her very uneasily about it 

her dear friend repeated mrs bevis when she told me this such
mischief-makers are always deemed dear friends till they are found out 

the widow says that i am the finest gentleman she ever beheld 

i have found a warm kiss now-and-then very kindly taken 

i might be a very wicked fellow jack if i were to do all the mischief
in my power but i am evermore for quitting a too-easy prey to reptile
rakes what but difficulty though the lady is an angel engages me to
so much perseverance here and here conquer or die is now the
determination 


 

i have just now parted with this honest widow she called upon me at my
new lodgings i told her that i saw i must be further obliged to her in
the course of this difficult affair she must allow me to make her a
handsome present when all was happily over but i desired that she would
take no notice of what should pass between us not even to her aunt for
that she as i saw was in the power of miss rawlins and miss rawlins 
being a maiden gentlewoman knew not the right and the fit in matrimonial
matters as she my dear widow did 

very true how should she said mrs bevis proud of knowing nothing 
but for her part she desired no present it was enough if she could
contribute to reconcile man and wife and disappoint mischief-makers 
she doubted not that such an envious creature as miss howe was glad that
mrs lovelace had eloped jealousy and love was old nick 

see belford how charmingly things work between me and my new
acquaintance the widow who knows but that she may after a little
farther intimacy though i am banished the house on nights contrive a
midnight visit for me to my spouse when all is still and fast asleep 

where can a woman be safe who has once entered the lists with a
contriving and intrepid lover 

but as to this letter methinkest thou sayest of miss howe 

i knew thou wouldest be uneasy for me but did not i tell thee that i
had provided for every thing that i always took care to keep seals
entire and to preserve covers was it not easy then thinkest thou to
contrive a shorter letter out of a longer and to copy the very words 


 see letter xx of this volume 


i can tell thee it was so well ordered that not being suspected to
have been in my hands it was not easy to find me out had it been my
beloved's hand there would have been no imitating it for such a length 
her delicate and even mind is seen in the very cut of her letters miss
howe's hand is no bad one but it is not so equal and regular that
little devil's natural impatience hurrying on her fingers gave i
suppose from the beginning her handwriting as well as the rest of her 
its fits and starts and those peculiarities which like strong muscular
lines in a face neither the pen nor the pencil can miss 

hast thou a mind tot see what it was i permitted miss howe to write to
her lovely friend why then read it here so extracted from her's of
wednesday last with a few additions of my own the additions
underscored 


 editor's note in place of italics as in the original i have
substituted hooks     


my dearest friend 

you will perhaps think that i have been too long silent but i had begun
two letters at different times since my last and written a great deal
each time and with spirit enough i assure you incensed as i was against
the abominable wretch you are with particularly on reading your's of the
21st of the past month 

the first i intended to keep open till i could give you some account of
my proceedings with mrs townsend it was some days before i saw her 
and this intervenient space giving me time to reperuse what i had
written i thought it proper to lay that aside and to write in a style a
little less fervent for you would have blamed me i knew for the
freedom of some of my expressions execrations if you please and
when i had gone a good way in the second and change your prospects on
his communicating to you miss montague's letter and his better
behaviour occasioning a change in your mind i laid that aside also 
and in this uncertainty thought i would wait to see the issue of affairs
between you before i wrote again believing that all would soon be
decided one way or other 


 


 here i was forced to break off i am too little my own mistress my
mother is always up and down and watching as if i were writing to a
fellow what need i she asks me lock myself in if i am only
reading past correspondencies for that is my pretence when she comes
poking in with her face sharpened to an edge as i may say by a
curiosity that gives her more pain than pleasure the lord forgive me 
but i believe i shall huff her next time she comes in  


 see letter xx of this volume 
 ibid 


 


do you forgive me too my dear my mother ought because she says i am my
father's girl and because i am sure i am her's 


 upon my life my dear i am sometimes of opinion that this vile man was
capable of meaning you dishonour when i look back upon his past conduct 
i cannot help and verily believe that he has laid aside such thoughts 
my reasons for both opinions i will give you  

 for the first to-wit that he had it once in his head to take you at
advantage if he could i consider that  pride revenge and a delight to
tread in unbeaten paths are principal ingredients in the character of
this finished libertine he hates all your family yourself excepted 
yet is a savage in love his pride and the credit which a few plausible
qualities sprinkled among his odious ones have given him have secured
him too good a reception from our eye-judging our undistinguishing our
self flattering our too-confiding sex to make assiduity and
obsequiousness and a conquest of his unruly passions any part of his
study 

he has some reason for his animosity to all the men and to one woman of
your family he has always shown you and his own family too that he
prefers his pride to his interest he is a declared marriage-hater a
notorious intriguer full of his inventions and glorying in them as
his vanity had made him imagine that no woman could be proof against his
love no wonder that he struggled like a lion held in toils against a
passion that he thought not returned hence perhaps it is not
difficult to believe that it became possible for such a wretch as this
to give way to his old prejudices against marriage and to that revenge
which had always been a first passion with him 


 see letter xx of this volume 
 ibid 
 ibid 


 and hence we may account for  his delays his teasing ways his bringing
you to bear with his lodging in the same house his making you pass to
the other people of it as his wife his bringing you into the company of
his libertine companions the attempt of imposing upon you that miss
partington for a bedfellow etc 

 my reasons for a contrary opinion to wit that he is now resolved to do
you all the justice in his power to do you   are these that he sees
that all his own family have warmly engaged themselves in your cause 
that the horrid wretch loves you with such a love however as herod
loved his mariamne that on inquiry i find it to be true that
counsellor williams whom mr hickman knows to be a man of eminence in
his profession has actually as good as finished the settlements that
two draughts of them have been made one avowedly to be sent to this very
captain tomlinson and i find that a license has actually been more
than once endeavoured to be obtained and that difficulties have hitherto
been made equally to lovelace's vexation and disappointment my
mother's proctor who is very intimate with the proctor applied to by the
wretch has come at this information in confidence and hints that as
mr lovelace is a man of high fortunes these difficulties will probably
be got over 


 see letter xx of this volume 


 i had once resolved to make strict inquiry about tomlinson and still 
if you will your uncle's favourite housekeeper may be sounded at a
distance  

 i know that the matter is so laid   that mrs hodges is supposed to
know nothing of the treaty set on foot by means of captain tomlinson 
but your uncle is an 


 see letter xx of this volume 


but your uncle is an old man and old men imagine themselves to be under
obligation to their paramours if younger than themselves and seldom
keep any thing from their knowledge yet methinks there can be no
need since tomlinson as you describe him is so good a man and so much
of a gentleman the end to be answered by his being an impostor so much
more than necessary if lovelace has villany in his head and thus what
he communicated to you of mr hickman's application to your uncle and of
mrs norton's to your mother some of which particulars i am satisfied
his vile agent joseph leman could not reveal to his viler employer his
pushing on the marriage-day in the name of your uncle which it could not
answer any wicked purpose for him to do and what he writes of your
uncle's proposal to have it thought that you were married from the time
that you had lived in one house together and that to be made to agree
with the time of mr hickman's visit to your uncle the insisting on a
trusty person's being present at the ceremony at that uncle's nomination
 these things make me  assured that he now at last means honourably  


 see letter xx of this volume 


 but if any unexpected delays should happen on his side acquaint me my
dear with the very street where mrs sinclair lives and where mrs 
fretchville's house is situated which i cannot find that you have ever
mentioned in your former letters which is a little odd and i will make
strict inquiries of them and of tomlinson too and i will if your heart
will let you take my advice soon procure you a refuge from him with mrs 
townsend  

 but why do i now when you seem to be in so good a train puzzle and
perplex you with my retrospections and yet they may be of use to you 
if any delay happen on his part  

 but that i think cannot well be what you have therefore now to do is
so to behave to this proud-spirited wretch as may banish from his mind
all remembrance of  past disobligations and to receive his addresses 
as those of a betrothed lover you will incur the censure of prudery and
affectation if you keep him at that distance which you have hitherto
 kept him at   his sudden and as suddenly recovered illness has given
him an opportunity to find out that you love him alas my dear i knew
you loved him he has seemed to change his nature and is all love and
gentleness  and no more quarrels now i beseech you  


 see letter xx of this volume 


 i am very angry with him nevertheless for the freedoms which he took
with your person and i think some guard is necessary as he is
certainly an encroacher but indeed all men are so and you are such a
charming creature and have kept him at such a distance but no more of
this subject only my dear be not over-nice now you are so near the
state you see what difficulties you laid yourself under   when
tomlinson's letter called you again into  the wretch's  company 


 see letter xi of this volume 


if you meet with no impediments no new causes of doubt your reputation
in the eye of the world is concerned that you should be his  and as
your uncle rightly judges be thought to have been his before now   and
yet  let me tell you   i  can hardly  bear  to think   that these
libertines should be rewarded for their villany with the best of the sex 
when the worst of it are too good for them 


 see letter xx of this volume 


i shall send this long letter by collins who changes his day to oblige
me as none of our letters by wilson's conveyance have miscarried when
you have been in more apparently-disagreeable situations than you are in
at present  i have no doubt  that this will go safe 


 see letter xx of this volume 


miss lardner whom you have seen hat her cousin biddulph's saw you at
st james's church on sunday was fortnight she kept you in her eye
during the whole time but could not once obtain the notice of your's 
though she courtesied to you twice she thought to pay her compliments
to you when the service was over for she doubted not but you were
married and for an odd reason because you came to church by yourself 
every eye as usual wherever you are she said was upon you and this
seeming to give you hurry and you being nearer the door than she you
slid out before she could get to you but she ordered her servant to
follow you till you were housed this servant saw you step into a chair
which waited for you and you ordered the men to carry you to the place
where they took you up she  describes the house  as a very genteel
house and fit to receive people of fashion  and what makes me mention
this is that perhaps you will have a visit from her or message at
least  


 see letter xx of this volume 


 so that you have mr doleman's testimony to the credit of the house
and people you are with and he is  a man of fortune and some
reputation formerly a rake indeed but married to a woman of family 
and having had a palsy blow one would think a penitent you have  also
mr mennell's at least passive testimony mr   tomlinson's  and now 
lastly miss lardner's so that there will be the less need for inquiry 
but you know my busy and inquisitive temper as well as my affection for
you and my concern for your honour but all doubt will soon be lost in
certainty  

 nevertheless i must add that i would have you  command me up if i can
be of the least service or pleasure to you i value not fame i value
not censure nor even life itself i verily think as i do your honour 
and your friendship for is not your honour my honour and is not your
friendship the pride of my life 


 see letter xx of this volume 


may heaven preserve you my dearest creature in honour and safety is
the prayer the hourly prayer of

your ever-faithful and affectionate 
anna howe 

thursday morn 5 

i have written all night  excuse indifferent writing my crow-quills
are worn to the stumps and i must get a new supply  


 


these ladies always write with crow-quills jack 

if thou art capable of taking in all my providences in this letter thou
wilt admire my sagacity and contrivance almost as much as i do myself 
thou seest that miss lardner mrs sinclair tomlinson mrs 
fretchville mennell are all mentioned in it my first liberties with
her person also  modesty modesty belford i doubt is more confined
to time place and occasion even by the most delicate minds than these
minds would have it believed to be   and why all these taken notice of
by me from the genuine letter but for fear some future letter from the
vixen should escape my hands in which she might refer to these names 
and if none of them were to have been found in this that is to pass for
her's i might be routed horse and foot as lord m would phrase it in a
like case 

devilish hard and yet i may thank myself to be put to all this plague
and trouble and for what dost thou ask o jack for a triumph of more
value to me beforehand than an imperial crown don't ask me the value of
it a month hence but what indeed is an imperial crown itself when a man
is used to it 

miss howe might well be anxious about the letter she wrote her sweet
friend from what i have let pass of her's has reason to rejoice in the
thought that it fell not into my hands 

and now must all my contrivances be set at work to intercept the
expected letter from miss howe which is as i suppose to direct her to
a place of safety and out of my knowledge mrs townsend is no doubt 
in this case to smuggle her off i hope the villain as i am so
frequently called between these two girls will be able to manage this
point 

but what perhaps thou askest if the lady should take it into her head 
by the connivance of miss rawlins to quit this house privately in the
night 

i have thought of this jack does not will lie in the house and is
not the widow bevis my fast friend 



letter xxxi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
saturday six o'clock june 10 


the lady gave will s sweetheart a letter last night to be carried to the
post-house as this morning directed for miss howe under cover to
hickman i dare say neither cover nor letter will be seen to have been
opened the contents but eight lines to own the receipt of her
double-dated letter in safety and referring to a longer letter which
she intends to write when she shall have a quieter heart and less
trembling fingers but mentions something to have happened  my detecting
her she means  which has given her very great flutters confusions and
apprehensions but which she will wait the issue of  some hopes for me
hence jack   before she gives her fresh perturbation or concern on her
account she tells her how impatient she shall be for her next  etc 

now belford i thought it would be but kind in me to save miss howe's
concern on these alarming hints since the curiosity of such a spirit
must have been prodigiously excited by them having therefore so good a
copy to imitate i wrote and taking out that of my beloved put under
the same cover the following short billet inscriptive and conclusive
parts of it in her own words 


hampstead tues even 

my ever-dear miss howe 

a few lines only till calmer spirits and quieter fingers be granted me 
and till i can get over the shock which your intelligence has given me 
to acquaint you that your kind long letter of wednesday and as i may
say of thursday morning is come safe to my hands on receipt of your's
by my messenger to you i sent for it from wilson's there thank
heaven it lay may that heaven reward you for all your past and for
all your intended goodness to

your for-ever obliged 
cl harlowe 


 


i took great pains in writing this it cannot i hope be suspected 
her hand is so very delicate yet her's is written less beautifully than
she usually writes and i hope miss howe will allow somewhat for hurry of
spirits and unsteady fingers 

my consideration for miss howe's ease of mind extended still farther than
to the instance i have mentioned 

that this billet might be with her as soon as possible and before it
could have reached hickman by the post i dispatched it away by a
servant of mowbray's miss howe had there been any failure or delay 
might as thou wilt think have communicated her anxieties to her
fugitive friend and she to me perhaps in a way i should not have been
pleased with 

once more wilt thou wonderingly question all this pains for a single
girl 

yes jack but is not this girl a clarissa and who knows but kind
fortune as a reward for my perseverance may toss me in her charming
friend less likely things have come to pass belford and to be sure i
shall have her if i resolve upon it 



letter xxxii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
eight o'clock sat morn june 10 


i am come back from mrs moore's whither i went in order to attend my
charmer's commands but no admittance a very bad night 

doubtless she must be as much concerned that she has carried her
resentments so very far as i have reason to be that i made such poor use
of the opportunity i had on wednesday night 

but now jack for a brief review of my present situation and a slight
hint or two of my precautions 

i have seen the women this morning and find them half-right half-
doubting 

miss rawlins's brother tells her that she lives at mrs moore's 

mrs moore can do nothing without miss rawlins 

people who keep lodgings at public places expect to get by every one who
comes into their purlieus though not permitted to lodge there myself i
have engaged all the rooms she has to spare to the very garrets and
that as i have told thee before for a month certain and at her own
price board included my spouse's and all but she must not at present
know it so i hope i have mrs moore fast by the interest 

this devil-like is suiting temptations to inclinations 

i have always observed and i believe i have hinted as much formerly 
that all dealers though but for pins may be taken in by customers for
pins sooner than by a direct bribe of ten times the value especially if
pretenders to conscience for the offer of a bribe would not only give
room for suspicion but would startle and alarm their scrupulousness 
while a high price paid for what you buy is but submitting to be cheated
in the method of the person makes a profession to get by have i not
said that human nature is a rogue and do not i know that it is 


 see vol iii letter xxxiv 
 see vol iii letter xxxv and vol iv letter xxi 


to give a higher instance how many proud senators in the year 1720 
were induced by presents or subscription of south-sea stock to
contribute to a scheme big with national ruin who yet would have spurned
the man who should have presumed to offer them even twice the sum certain
that they had a chance to gain by the stock but to return to my review
and to my precautions 

miss rawlins fluctuates as she hears the lady's story or as she hears
mine somewhat of an infidel i doubt is this miss rawlins i have not
yet considered her foible the next time i see her i will take
particular notice of all the moles and freckles in her mind and then
infer and apply 

the widow bevis as i have told thee is all my own 

my man will lies in the house my other new fellow attends upon me and
cannot therefore be quite stupid 

already is will over head and ears in love with one of mrs moore's
maids he was struck with her the moment he set his eyes upon her a
raw country wench too but all women from the countess to the cook-
maid are put into high good humour with themselves when a man is taken
with them at first sight be they ever so plain  no woman can be ugly 
jack   they'll find twenty good reasons besides the great one for
sake's sake by the help of the glass without and perhaps in spite of
it and conceit within to justify the honest fellow's caption 

the rogue has saved 150  in my service  more by 50 than i bid him
save no doubt he thinks he might have done so though i believe not
worth a groat the best of masters i passionate indeed but soon
appeased 

the wench is extremely kind to him already the other maid is also very
civil to him he has a husband for her in his eye she cannot but say 
that mr andrew my other servant  the girl is for fixing the person  is
a very well spoken civil young man 

we common folks have our joys and please your honour says honest
joseph leman like as our betters have  and true says honest joseph 
did i prefer ease to difficulty i should envy these low-born sinners
some of their joys 


 see vol iii letter xlvii 


but if will had not made amorous pretensions to the wenches we all
know that servants united in one common compare-note cause are
intimate the moment they see one another great genealogists too they
know immediately the whole kin and kin's kin of each other though
dispersed over the three kingdoms as well as the genealogies and kin's
kin of those whom they serve 

but my precautions end not here 

o jack with such an invention what occasion had i to carry my beloved
to mrs sinclair's 

my spouse may have farther occasion for the messengers whom she
dispatched one to miss howe the other to wilson's with one of these
will is already well-acquainted as thou hast heard to mingle liquor
is to mingle souls with these fellows with the other messenger he will
soon be acquainted if he be not already 

the captain's servant has his uses and instructions assigned him i have
hinted at some of them already he also serves a most humane and
considerate master i love to make every body respected to my power 


 see letter xxix of this volume 


the post general and penny will be strictly watched likewise 

miss howe's collins is remembered to be described miss howe's and
hickman's liveries also 

james harlowe and singleton are warned against i am to be acquainted
with any inquiry that shall happen to be made after my spouse whether by
her married or maiden name before she shall be told of it and this that
i may have it in my power to prevent mischief 

i have ordered mowbray and tourville and belton if his health permit 
to take their quarters at hampstead for a week with their fellows to
attend them i spare thee for the present because of thy private
concerns but hold thyself in cheerful readiness however as a mark of
thy allegiance 

as to my spouse herself has she not reason to be pleased with me for
having permitted her to receive miss howe's letter from wilson's a
plain case either that i am no deep plotter or that i have no farther
views than to make my peace with her for an offence so slight and so
accidental 

miss howe says though prefaced with an alas that her charming friend
loves me she must therefore yearn after this reconciliation prospects
so fair if she showed me any compassion seemed inclinable to spare
me and to make the most favourable construction i cannot but say that
it would be impossible not to show her some but to be insulted and
defied by a rebel in one's power what prince can bear that 

but i must return to the scene of action i must keep the women steady 
i had no opportunity to talk to my worthy mrs bevis in private 

tomlinson a dog not come yet 



letter xxxiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
from my apartments at mrs moore's 


miss rawlins at her brothers mrs moore engaged in household matters 
widow bevis dressing i have nothing to do but write this cursed
tomlinson not yet arrived nothing to be done without him 

i think he shall complain in pretty high language of the treatment he met
with yesterday what are our affairs to him he can have no view but
to serve us cruel to send back to town un-audienced unseen a man of
his business and importance he never stirs a-foot but something of
consequence depends upon his movements a confounded thing to trifle
thus humoursomely with such a gentleman's moments these women think 
that all the business of the world must stand still for their figaries
 a good female word jack   the greatest triflers in the creation to
fancy themselves the most important beings in it marry come up as i
have heard goody sorlings say to her servants when she has rated at them
with mingled anger and disdain 

after all methinks i want those tostications  thou seest how women and
women's words fill my mind  to be over happily over that i may sit
down quietly and reflect upon the dangers i have passed through and the
troubles i have undergone i have a reflecting mind as thou knowest 
but the very word reflecting implies all got over 

what briars and thorns does the wretch rush into a scratched face and
tattered garments the unavoidable consequence who will needs be for
striking out a new path through overgrown underwood quitting that beaten
out for him by those who have travelled the same road before him 


 


a visit from the widow bevis in my own apartment she tells me that my
spouse had thoughts last night after i was gone to my lodgings of
removing from mrs moore's 

i almost wish she had attempted to do so 

miss rawlins it seems who was applied to upon it dissuaded her from
it 

mrs moore also though she did not own that will lay in the house or
rather set up in it courting set before her the difficulties which 
in her opinion she would have to get clear off without my knowledge 
assuring her that she could be no where more safe than with her till
she had fixed whither to go and the lady herself recollected that if
she went she might miss the expected letter from her dear friend miss
howe which as she owned was to direct her future steps 

she must also surely have some curiosity to know what her uncle's friend
had to say to her from her uncle contemptuously as she yesterday treated
a man of his importance nor could she i should think be absolutely
determined to put herself out of the way of receiving the visits of two
of the principal ladies of my family and to break entirely with me in
the face of them all besides whither could she have gone moreover 
miss howe's letter coming after her elopement so safely to her hands 
must surely put her into a more confiding temper with me and with every
one else though she would not immediately own it 

but these good folks have so little charity are such severe censurers 
 yet who is absolutely perfect it were to be wished however that
they would be so modest as to doubt themselves sometimes then would they
allow for others as others excellent as they imagine themselves to be 
must for them 


saturday one o'clock 

tomlinson at last is come forced to ride five miles about though i
shall impute his delay to great and important business to avoid the
sight of two or three impertinent rascals who little thinking whose
affairs he was employed in wanted to obtrude themselves upon him i
think i will make this fellow easy if he behave to my liking in this
affair 

i sent up the moment he came 

she desired to be excused receiving his visit till four this afternoon 

intolerable no consideration none at all in this sex when their
cursed humours are in the way pay-day pay-hour rather will come 
oh that it were to be the next 

the captain is in a pet who can blame him even the women think a man
of his consequence and generously coming to serve us hardly used 
would to heaven she had attempted to get off last night the women not
my enemies who knows but the husband's exerted authority might have met
with such connivance as might have concluded either in carrying her back
to her former lodgings or in consummation at mrs moore's in spite of
exclamations fits and the rest of the female obsecrations 

my beloved has not appeared to any body this day except to mrs moore 
is it seems extremely low unfit for the interesting conversation that
is to be held in the afternoon longs to hear from her dear friend miss
howe yet cannot expect a letter for a day or two has a bad opinion of
all mankind no wonder excellent creature as she is with such a
father such uncles such a brother as she has 

how does she look 

better than could be expected from yesterday's fatigue and last night's
ill rest 

these tender doves know not till put to it what they can bear 
especially when engaged in love affairs and their attention wholly
engrossed but the sex love busy scenes still life is their aversion 
a woman will create a storm rather than be without one so that they
can preside in the whirlwind and direct it they are happy but my
beloved's misfortune is that she must live in tumult yet neither raise
them herself nor be able to controul them 



letter xxxiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sat night june 10 


what will be the issue of all my plots and contrivances devil take me if
i am able to divine but i will not as lord m would say forestall my
own market 

at four the appointed hour i sent up to desire admittance in the
captain's name and my own 

she would wait upon the captain presently  not upon me   and in the
parlour if it were not engaged 

the dining-room being mine perhaps that was the reason of her naming the
parlour mighty nice again if so no good sign for me thought i this
stiff punctilio 

in the parlour with me and the captain were mrs moore miss rawlins 
and mrs bevis 

the women said they would withdraw when the lady came down 

lovel not except she chooses you should ladies people who are so
much above-board as i am need not make secrets of any of their affairs 
besides you three ladies are now acquainted with all our concerns 

capt i have some things to say to your lady that perhaps she would
not herself choose that any body should hear not even you mr lovelace 
as you and her family are not upon such a good foot of understanding as
were to be wished 

lovel well well captain i must submit give us a sign to withdraw 
and we will withdraw 

it was better that the exclusion of the women should come from him than
from me 

capt i will bow and wave my hand thus when i wish to be alone with
the lady her uncle dotes upon her i hope mr lovelace you will not
make a reconciliation more difficult for the earnestness which my dear
friend shows to bring it to bear but indeed i must tell you as i told
you more than once before that i am afraid you have made lighter of the
occasion of this misunderstanding to me than it ought to have been made 

lovel i hope captain tomlinson you do not question my veracity 

capt i beg your pardon mr lovelace but those things which we men
may think lightly of may not be light to a woman of delicacy and then 
if you have bound yourself by a vow you ought 

miss rawlins bridling her lips closed but her mouth stretched to a
smile of approbation the longer for not buttoning tacitly showed
herself pleased with the captain for his delicacy 

mrs moore could speak very true however was all she said with a
motion of her head that expressed the bow-approbatory 

for my part said the jolly widow staring with eyes as big as eggs i
know what i know but man and wife are man and wife or they are not
man and wife i have no notion of standing upon such niceties 

but here she comes cried one hearing her chamber-door open here she
comes another hearing it shut after her and down dropt the angel among
us 

we all stood up bowing and courtesying and could not help it for she
entered with such an air as commanded all our reverence yet the captain
looked plaguy grave 

cl pray keep your seats ladies pray do not go  for they made offers
to withdraw yet miss rawlins would have burst had she been suffered to
retire   before this time you have all heard my story i make no doubt 
pray keep your seats at least all mr lovelace's 

a very saucy and whimsical beginning thought i 

captain tomlinson your servant addressing herself to him with
inimitable dignity i hope you did not take amiss my declining your
visit yesterday i was really incapable of talking upon any subject that
required attention 

capt i am glad to see you better now madam i hope i do 

cl indeed i am not well i would not have excused myself from
attending you some hours ago but in hopes i should have been better i
beg your pardon sir for the trouble i have given you and shall the
rather expect it as this day will i hope conclude it all 

thus set thus determined thought i yet to have slept upon it but 
as what she said was capable of a good as well as a bad construction i
would not put an unfavourable one upon it 

lovel the captain was sorry my dear he did not offer his attendance
the moment he arrived yesterday he was afraid that you took it amiss
that he did not 

cl perhaps i thought that my uncle's friend might have wished to see
me as soon as he came  how we stared   but sir  to me   it might be
convenient to you to detain him 

the devil thought i so there really was resentment as well as head-
ache as my good friend mrs bevis observed in her refusing to see the
honest gentleman 

capt you would detain me mr lovelace i was for paying my respects
to the lady the moment i came 

cl well sir  interrupting him   to wave this for i would not be
thought captious if you have not suffered inconvenience in being
obliged to come again i shall be easy 

capt  half disconcerted   a little inconvenience i can't say but i
have suffered i have indeed too many affairs upon my hands but the
desire i have to serve you and mr lovelace as well as to oblige my dear
friend your uncle harlowe make great inconveniencies but small ones 

cl you are very obliging sir here is a great alteration since you
parted with us last 

capt a great one indeed madam i was very much surprised at it on
thursday evening when mr lovelace conducted me to your lodgings where
we hoped to find you 

cl have you any thing to say to me sir from my uncle himself that
requires my private ear don't go ladies  for the women stood up and
offered to withdraw   if mr lovelace stays i am sure you may 

i frowned i bit my lip i looked at the women and shook my head 

capt i have nothing to offer but what mr lovelace is a party to and
may hear except one private word or two which may be postponed to the
last 

cl pray ladies keep your seats things are altered sir since i
saw you you can mention nothing that relates to me now to which that
gentleman can be a party 

capt you surprise me madam i am sorry to hear this sorry for your
uncle's sake sorry for your sake sorry for mr lovelace's sake and
yet i am sure he must have given greater occasion than he has mentioned
to me or 

lovel indeed captain indeed ladies i have told you great part of
my story and what i told you of my offence was the truth what i
concealed of my story was only what i apprehended would if known cause
this dear creature to be thought more censorious than charitable 

cl well well sir say what you please make me as black as you
please make yourself as white as you can i am not now in your power 
that consideration will comfort me for all 

capt god forbid that i should offer to plead in behalf of a crime 
that a woman of virtue and honour cannot forgive but surely surely 
madam this is going too far 

cl do not blame me captain tomlinson i have a good opinion of you 
as my uncle's friend but if you are mr lovelace's friend that is
another thing for my interest and mr lovelace's must now be for ever
separated 

capt one word with you madam if you please offering to retire 

cl you may say all that you please to say before these gentlewomen 
mr lovelace may have secrets i have none you seem to think me faulty 
i should be glad that all the world knew my heart let my enemies sit in
judgment upon my actions fairly scanned i fear not the result let them
even ask me my most secret thoughts and whether they make for me or
against me i will reveal them 

capt noble lady who can say as you say 

the women held up their hands and eyes each as if she had said not i 

no disorder here said miss rawlins but judging by her own heart a
confounded deal of improbability i believe she thought 

finely said to be sure said the widow bevis shrugging her shoulders 

mrs moore sighed 

jack belford thought i knows all mine and in this i am more ingenuous
than any of the three and a fit match for this paragon 

cl how mr lovelace has found me out here i cannot tell but such mean
devices such artful such worse than waltham disguises put on to
obtrude himself into my company such bold such shocking untruths 

capt the favour of but one word madam in private 

cl in order to support a right which he has not over me o sir o
captain tomlinson i think i have reason to say that the man there he
stands is capable of any vileness 

the women looked upon one another and upon me by turns to see how i
bore it i had such dartings in my head at the instant that i thought i
should have gone distracted my brain seemed on fire what would i have
given to have had her alone with me i traversed the room my clenched
fist to my forehead o that i had any body here thought i that 
hercules-like when flaming in the tortures of dejanira's poisoned shirt 
i could tear in pieces 

capt dear lady see you not how the poor gentleman lord how have i
imposed upon your uncle at this rate how happy did i tell him i saw
you how happy i was sure you would be in each other 

cl o sir you don't know how many premeditated offences i had forgiven
when i saw you last before i could appear to you what i hoped then i
might for the future be but now you may tell my uncle if you please 
that i cannot hope for his mediation tell him that my guilt in giving
this man an opportunity to spirit me away from my tried my experienced 
my natural friends harshly as they treated me stares me every day
more and more in the face and still the more as my fate seems to be
drawing to a crisis according to the malediction of my offended father 

and then she burst into tears which even affected that dog who brought
to abet me was himself all belforded over 

the women so used to cry without grief as they are to laugh without
reason by mere force of example  confound their promptitudes   must
needs pull out their handkerchiefs the less wonder however as i
myself between confusion surprise and concern could hardly stand it 

what's a tender heart good for who can be happy that has a feeling
heart and yet thou'lt say that he who has it not must be a tiger 
and no man 

capt let me beg the favour of one word with you madam in private 
and that on my own account 

the women hereupon offered to retire she insisted that if they went 
i should not stay 

capt sir bowing to me shall i beg 

i hope thought i that i may trust this solemn dog instructed as he is 
she does not doubt him i'll stay out no longer than to give her time to
spend her first fire 

i then passively withdrew with the women but with such a bow to my
goddess that it won for me every heart but that i wanted most to win 
for the haughty maid bent not her knee in return 

the conversation between the captain and the lady when we were retired 
was to the following effect they both talked loud enough for me to hear
them the lady from anger the captain with design and thou mayest be
sure there was no listener but myself what i was imperfect in was
supplied afterwards for i had my vellum-leaved book to note all down 
if she had known this perhaps she would have been more sparing of her
invectives and but perhaps neither 

he told her that as her brother was absolutely resolved to see her and
as he himself in compliance with her uncle's expedient had reported her
marriage and as that report had reached the ears of lord m lady betty 
and the rest of my relations and as he had been obliged in consequence
of his first report to vouch it and as her brother might find out where
she was and apply to the women here for a confirmation or refutation of
the marriage he had thought himself obliged to countenance the report
before the women that this had embarrassed him not a little as he
would not for the world that she should have cause to think him capable
of prevarication contrivance or double dealing and that this made him
desirous of a private conversation with her 

it was true she said she had given her consent to such an expedient 
believing it was her uncle's and little thinking that it would lead to
so many errors yet she might have known that one error is frequently
the parent of many mr lovelace had made her sensible of the truth of
that observation on more occasions than one and it was an observation
that he the captain had made in one of the letters that was shown her
yesterday 


 see letter xxiv 


he hoped that she had no mistrust of him that she had no doubt of his
honour if madam you suspect me if you think me capable what a man 
the lord be merciful to me what a man must you think me 

i hope sir there cannot be a man in the world who could deserve to be
suspected in such a case as this i do not suspect you if it were
possible there could be one such a man i am sure captain tomlinson a
father of children a man in years of sense and experience cannot be
that man 

he told me that just then he thought he felt a sudden flash from her
eye an eye-beam as he called it dart through his shivering reins and
he could not help trembling 

the dog's conscience jack nothing else i have felt half a dozen such
flashes such eye-beams in as many different conversations with this
soul-piercing beauty 

her uncle she must own was not accustomed to think of such expedients 
but she had reconciled this to herself as the case was unhappily
uncommon and by the regard he had for her honour 

this set the puppy's heart at ease and gave him more courage 

she asked him if he thought lady betty and miss montague intended her a
visit 

he had no doubt but they did 

and does he imagine said she that i could be brought to countenance to
them the report you have given out 

 i had hoped to bring her to this jack or she had seen their letters 
but i had told the captain that i believed i must give up this
expectation  

no he believed that i had not such a thought he was pretty sure that
i intended when i saw them to tell them as in confidence the naked
truth 

he then told her that her uncle had already made some steps towards a
general reconciliation the moment madam that he knows you are really
married he will enter into confidence with your father upon it having
actually expressed to your mother his desire to be reconciled to you 

and what sir said my mother what said my dear mother 

with great emotion she asked this question holding out her sweet face 
as the captain described her with the most earnest attention as if she
would shorten the way which his words were to have to her heart 

your mother madam burst into tears upon it and your uncle was so
penetrated by her tenderness that he could not proceed with the subject 
but he intends to enter upon it with her in form as soon as he hears
that the ceremony is over 

by the tone of her voice she wept the dear creature thought i begins
to relent and i grudged the dog his eloquence i could hardly bear the
thought that any man breathing should have the power which i had lost of
persuading this high-souled woman though in my own favour and wouldest
thou think it this reflection gave me more uneasiness at the moment than
i felt from her reproaches violent as they were or than i had pleasure
in her supposed relenting for there is beauty in every thing she says
and does beauty in her passion beauty in her tears had the captain
been a young fellow and of rank and fortune his throat would have been
in danger and i should have thought very hardly of her 

o captain tomlinson said she you know not what i have suffered by this
man's strange ways he had as i was not ashamed to tell him yesterday 
a plain path before him he at first betrayed me into his power but
when i was in it there she stopt then resuming o sir you know not
what a strange man he has been an unpolite a rough-manner'd man in
disgrace of his birth and education and knowledge an unpolite man 
and so acting as if his worldly and personal advantages set him above
those graces which distinguish a gentleman 

the first woman that ever said or that ever thought so of me that's my
comfort thought i but this spoken of to her uncle's friend behind
my back helps to heap up thy already-too-full measure dearest it is
down in my vellum-book 

cl when i look back on his whole behaviour to a poor young creature 
 for i am but a very young creature i cannot acquit him either of great
folly or of deep design and last wednesday there she stopt and i
suppose turned away her face 

i wonder she was not ashamed to hint at what she thought so shameful and
that to a man and alone with him 

capt far be it from me madam to offer to enter too closely into so
tender a subject mr lovelace owns that you have reason to be
displeased with him but he so solemnly clears himself of premeditated
offence 

cl he cannot clear himself captain tomlinson the people of the
house must be very vile as well as he i am convinced that there was a
wicked confederacy but no more upon such a subject 

capt only one word more madam he tells me that you promised to
pardon him he tells me 

he knew interrupted she that he deserved not pardon or he had not
extorted the promise from me nor had i given it to him but to shield
myself from the vilest outrage 

capt i could wish madam inexcusable as his behaviour has been since
he has something to plead in the reliance he made upon your promise 
that for the sake of appearances to the world and to avoid the
mischiefs that may follow if you absolutely break with him you could
prevail upon your naturally-generous mind to lay an obligation upon him
by your forgiveness 

she was silent 

capt your father and mother madam deplore a daughter lost to them 
whom your generosity to mr lovelace may restore do not put it to the
possible chance that they may have cause to deplore a double loss the
losing of a son as well as a daughter who by his own violence which
you may perhaps prevent may be for ever lost to them and to the whole
family 

she paused she wept she owned that she felt the force of this argument 

i will be the making of this fellow thought i 

capt permit me madam to tell you that i do not think it would be
difficult to prevail upon your uncle if you insist upon it to come up
privately to town and to give you with his own hand to mr lovelace 
except indeed your present misunderstanding were to come to his ears 
besides madam your brother it is likely may at this very time be in
town and he is resolved to find you out 

cl why sir should i be so much afraid of my brother my brother has
injured me not i him will my brother offer to me what mr lovelace has
offered wicked ungrateful man to insult a friendless unprotected
creature made friendless by himself i cannot cannot think of him in
the light i once thought of him what sir to put myself into the power
of a wretch who has acted by me with so much vile premeditation who
shall pity who shall excuse me if i do were i to suffer ever so much
from him no sir let mr lovelace leave me let my brother find me 
i am not such a poor creature as to be afraid to face the brother who has
injured me 

capt were you and your brother to meet only to confer together to
expostulate to clear up difficulties it were another thing but what 
madam can you think will be the issue of an interview mr solmes with
him when he finds you unmarried and resolved never to have mr 
lovelace supposing mr lovelace were not to interfere which cannot be
imagined 

cl well sir i can only say i am a very unhappy creature i must
resign to the will of providence and be patient under evils which that
will not permit me to shun but i have taken my measures mr lovelace
can never make me happy nor i him i wait here only for a letter from
miss howe that must determine me 

determine you as to mr lovelace madam interrupted the captain 

cl i am already determined as to him 

capt if it be not in his favour i have done i cannot use stronger
arguments than i have used and it would be impertinent to repeat them 
if you cannot forgive his offence i am sure it must have been much
greater than he has owned to me if you are absolutely determined be
pleased to let me know what i shall say to your uncle you were pleased
to tell me that this day would put an end to what you called my trouble 
i should not have thought it any could i have been an humble mean of
reconciling persons of worth and honour to each other 

here i entered with a solemn air 

lovel captain tomlinson i have heard a part of what has passed
between you and this unforgiving however otherwise excellent lady i
am cut to the heart to find the dear creature so determined i could
not have believed it possible with such prospects that i had so little
share in her esteem nevertheless i must do myself justice with regard
to the offence i was so unhappy as to give since i find you are ready
to think it much greater than it really was 

cl i hear not sir your recapitulations i am and ought to be the
sole judge of insults offered to my person i enter not into discussion
with you nor hear you on the shocking subject and was going 

i put myself between her and the door you may hear all i have to say 
madam my fault is not of such a nature but that you may i will be a
just accuser of myself and will not wound your ears 

i then protested that the fire was a real fire  so it was   i
disclaimed  less truly  premeditation i owned that i was hurried on by
the violence of a youthful passion and by a sudden impulse which few
other persons in the like situation would have been able to check that
i withdrew at her command and entreaty on the promise of pardon 
without having offered the least indecency or any freedom that would
not have been forgiven by persons of delicacy surprised in an attitude
so charming her terror on the alarm of fire calling for a soothing
behaviour and personal tenderness she being ready to fall into fits my
hoped-for happy day so near that i might be presumed to be looked upon
as a betrothed lover and that this excuse might be pleaded even for the
women of the house that they thinking us actually married might
suppose themselves to be the less concerned to interfere on so tender an
occasion  there jack was a bold insinuation on behalf of the women  

high indignation filled her disdainful eye eye-beam after eye-beam
flashing at me every feature of her sweet face had soul in it yet she
spoke not perhaps jack she had a thought that this plea for the
women accounted for my contrivance to have her pass to them as married 
when i first carried her thither 

capt indeed sir i must say that you did not well to add to the
apprehensions of a lady so much terrified before 

the dear creature offered to go by me i set my back against the door 
and besought her to stay a few moments i had not said thus much my
dearest creature but for your sake as well as for my own that captain
tomlinson should not think i had been viler than i was nor will i say
one word more on the subject after i have appealed to your own heart 
whether it was not necessary that i should say so much and to the
captain whether otherwise he would not have gone away with a much worse
opinion of me if he had judged of my offence by the violence of your
resentment 

capt indeed i should i own i should and i am very glad mr 
lovelace that you are able to defend yourself thus far 

cl that cause must be well tried where the offender takes his seat
upon the same bench with the judge i submit not mine to men nor give
me leave to say to you captain tomlinson though i am willing to have a
good opinion of you had not the man been assured that he had influenced
you in his favour he would not have brought you up to hampstead 

capt that i am influenced as you call it madam is for the sake of
your uncle and for your own sake more i will say to mr lovelace's
face than for his what can i have in view but peace and
reconciliation i have from the first blamed and i now again blame
mr lovelace for adding distress to distress and terror to terror the
lady as you acknowledge sir  looking valiantly   ready before to fall
into fits 

lovel let me own to you captain tomlinson that i have been a very
faulty a very foolish man and if this dear creature ever honoured me
with her love an ungrateful one but i have had too much reason to
doubt it and this is now a flagrant proof that she never had the value
for me which my proud heart wished for that with such prospects before
us a day so near settlements approved and drawn her uncle meditating a
general reconciliation which for her sake not my own i was desirous to
give into she can for an offence so really slight on an occasion so
truly accidental renounce me for ever and with me all hopes of that
reconciliation in the way her uncle had put it in and she had acquiesced
with and risque all consequences fatal ones as they may too possibly
be by my soul captain tomlinson the dear creature must have hated me
all the time she was intending to honour me with her hand and now she
must resolve to abandon me as far as i know with a preference in her
heart of the most odious of men in favour of that solmes who as you
tell me accompanies her brother and with what hopes with what view 
accompanies him how can i bear to think of this 

cl it is fit sir that you should judge of my regard for you by your
own conscienceness of demerit yet you know or you would not have dared
to behave to me as sometimes you did that you had more of it than you
deserved 

she walked from us and then returning captain tomlinson said she i
will own to you that i was not capable of resolving to give my hand and
 nothing but my hand had i not given a flagrant proof of this to the
once most indulgent of parents which has brought me into a distress 
which this man has heightened when he ought in gratitude and honour to
have endeavoured to render it supportable i had even a bias sir in
his favour i scruple not to own it long much too long bore i with
his unaccountable ways attributing his errors to unmeaning gaiety and
to a want of knowing what true delicacy and true generosity required
from a heart susceptible of grateful impressions to one involved by his
means in unhappy circumstances 

it is now wickedness in him a wickedness which discredits all his
professions to say that this last cruel and ungrateful insult was not
a premeditated one but what need i say more of this insult when it was
of such a nature and that it has changed that bias in his favour and
make me choose to forego all the inviting prospects he talks of and to
run all hazards to free myself from his power 

o my dearest creature how happy for us both had i been able to discover
that bias as you condescend to call it through such reserves as man
never encountered with 

he did discover it capt tomlinson he brought me more than once to
own it the more needlessly brought me to own it as i dare say his own
vanity gave him no cause to doubt it and as i had apparently no other
motive in not being forward to own it than my too-justly-founded
apprehensions of his want of generosity in a word captain tomlinson 
 and now that i am determined upon my measures i the less scruple to
say i should have despised myself had i found myself capable of
affectation or tyranny to the man i intended to marry i have always
blamed the dearest friend i have in the world for a fault of this nature 
in a word 

lovel and had my angel really and indeed the favour for me she is
pleased to own dearest creature forgive me restore me to your good
opinion surely i have not sinned beyond forgiveness you say that i
extorted from you the promise you made me but i could not have presumed
to make that promise the condition of my obedience had i not thought
there was room to expect forgiveness permit i beseech you the
prospects to take place that were opening so agreeably before us i
will go to town and bring the license all difficulties to the
obtaining of it are surmounted captain tomlinson shall be witness to
the deeds he will be present at the ceremony on the part of your uncle 
indeed he gave me hope that your uncle himself 

capt i did mr lovelace and i will tell you my grounds for the hope
i gave i promised to my dear friend your uncle madam that he
should give out that he would take a turn with me to my little farm-house 
as i call it near northampton for a week or so poor gentleman 
he has of late been very little abroad too visibly declining change
of air it might be given out was good for him but i see madam that
this is too tender a subject 

the dear creature wept she knew how to apply as meant the captain's
hint to the occasion of her uncle's declining state of health 

capt we might indeed i told him set out in that road but turn short
to town in my chariot and he might see the ceremony performed with his
own eyes and be the desired father as well as the beloved uncle 

she turned from us and wiped her eyes 

capt and really there seem now to be but two objections to this as
mr harlowe discouraged not the proposal the one the unhappy
misunderstanding between you which i would not by any means he should
know since then he might be apt to give weight to mr james harlowe's
unjust surmises the other that it would necessarily occasion some
delay to the ceremony which certainly may be performed in a day or two
 if 

and then he reverently bowed to my goddess charming fellow but often
did i curse my stars for making me so much obliged to his adroitness 

she was going to speak but not liking the turn of her countenance
 although as i thought its severity and indignation seemed a little
abated i said and had like to have blown myself up by it one expedient
i have just thought of 

cl none of your expedients mr lovelace i abhor your expedients 
your inventions i have had too many of them 

lovel see capt tomlinson see sir o how we expose ourselves to
you little did you think i dare say that we have lived in such a
continued misunderstanding together but you will make the best of it
all we may yet be happy oh that i could have been assured that this
dear creature loved me with the hundredth part of the love i have for
her our diffidences have been mutual i presume to say that she has
too much punctilio i am afraid that i have too little hence our
difficulties but i have a heart captain tomlinson a heart that bids
me hope for her love because it is resolved to deserve it as much as man
can deserve it 

capt i am indeed surprised at what i have seen and heard i defend
not mr lovelace madam in the offence he has given you as a father of
daughters myself i cannot defend him though his fault seems to be
lighter than i had apprehended but in my conscience madam i think you
carry your resentment too high 

cl too high sir too high to the man that might have been happy if
he would too high to the man that has held my soul in suspense an
hundred times since by artifice and deceit he obtained a power over
me say lovelace thyself say art thou not the very lovelace who by
insulting me hast wronged thine own hopes the wretch that appeared in
vile disguises personating an old lame creature seeking for lodgings
for thy sick wife telling the gentlewomen here stories all of thine own
invention and asserting to them an husband's right over me which thou
hast not and is it  turning to the captain  to be expected that i
should give credit to the protestations of such a man 

lovel treat me my dearest creature as you please i will bear it 
and yet your scorn and your violence have fixed daggers in my heart but
was it possible without those disguises to come at your speech and
could i lose you if study if invention would put it in my power to
arrest your anger and give me hope to engage you to confirm to me the
promised pardon the address i made to you before the women as if the
marriage-ceremony had passed was in consequence of what your uncle had
advised and what you had acquiesced with and the rather made as your
brother and singleton and solmes were resolved to find out whether
what was reported of your marriage were true or not that they might take
their measures accordingly and in hopes to prevent that mischief which
i have been but too studious to prevent since this tameness has but
invited insolence from your brother and his confederates 

cl o thou strange wretch how thou talkest but captain tomlinson 
give me leave to say that were i inclined to enter farther upon this
subject i would appeal to miss rawlins's judgment whom else have i to
appeal to she seems to be a person of prudence and honour but not to
any man's judgment whether i carry my resentment beyond fit bounds when
i resolve 

capt forgive madam the interruption but i think there can be no
reason for this you ought as you said to be the sole judge of
indignities offered you the gentlewomen here are strangers to you you
will perhaps stay but a little while among them if you lay the state of
your case before any of them and your brother come to inquire of them 
your uncle's intended mediation will be discovered and rendered abortive
 i shall appear in a light that i never appeared in in my life for these
women may not think themselves obliged to keep the secret 

charming fellow 

cl o what difficulties has one fatal step involved me in but there is
no necessity for such an appeal to any body i am resolved on my
measures 

capt absolutely resolved madam 

cl i am 

capt what shall i say to your uncle harlowe madam poor gentleman 
how will he be surprised you see mr lovelace you see sir turning
to me with a flourishing hand but you may thank yourself and admirably
stalked he from us 

true by my soul thought i i traversed the room and bit my
unpersuasive lips now upper now under for vexation 

he made a profound reverence to her and went to the window where lay
his hat and whip and taking them up opened the door child said he 
to some body he saw pray order my servant to bring my horse to the
door 

lovel you won't go sir i hope you won't i am the unhappiest man in
the world you won't go yet alas but you won't go sir there may
be yet hopes that lady betty may have some weight 

capt dear mr lovelace and may not my worthy friend and affectionate
uncle hope for some influence upon his daughter-niece but i beg pardon
 a letter will always find me disposed to serve the lady and that as
well for her sake as for the sake of my dear friend 

she had thrown herself into her chair her eyes cast down she was
motionless as in a profound study 

the captain bowed to her again but met with no return to his bow mr 
lovelace said he with an air of equality and independence i am
your's 

still the dear unaccountable sat as immovable as a statue stirring
neither hand foot head nor eye i never before saw any one in so
profound a reverie in so waking a dream 

he passed by her to go out at the door she sat near though the passage
by the other door was his direct way and bowed again she moved not 
i will not disturb the lady in her meditations sir adieu mr lovelace
 no farther i beseech you 

she started sighing are you going sir 

capt i am madam i could have been glad to do you service but i see
it is not in my power 

she stood up holding out one hand with inimitable dignity and sweetness
 i am sorry you are going sir can't help it i have no friend to
advise with mr lovelace has the art or good fortune perhaps i should
call it to make himself many well sir if you will go i can't help
it 

capt i will not go madam his eyes twinkling  again seized with a
fit of humanity   i will not go if my longer stay can do you either
service or pleasure what sir  turning to me   what mr lovelace was
your expedient perhaps something may be offered madam 

she sighed and was silent 

revenge invoked i to myself keep thy throne in my heart if the
usurper love once more drive thee from it thou wilt never again regain
possession 

lovel what i had thought of what i had intended to propose  and i
sighed   was this that the dear creature if she will not forgive me as
she promised will suspend the displeasure she has conceived against me 
till lady betty arrives that lady may be the mediatrix between us 
this dear creature may put herself into her protection and accompany her
down to her seat in oxfordshire it is one of her ladyship's purposes to
prevail on her supposed new niece to go down with her it may pass to
every one but to lady betty and to you captain tomlinson and to your
friend mr harlowe as he desires that we have been some time married 
and her being with my relations will amount to a proof to james harlowe
that we are and our nuptials may be privately and at this beloved
creature's pleasure solemnized and your report captain authenticated 

capt upon my honour madam clapping his hand upon his breast a
charming expedient this will answer every end 

she mused she was greatly perplexed at last god direct me said she i
know not what to do a young unfriended creature whom can i have to
advise with let me retire if i can retire 

she withdrew with slow and trembling feet and went up to her chamber 

for heaven's sake said the penetrated varlet  his hands lifted up  for
heaven's sake take compassion upon this admirable woman i cannot
proceed she deserves all things 

softly d n the fellow the women are coming in 

he sobbed up his grief turned about hemm'd up a more manly accent wipe
thy cursed eyes he did the sunshine took place on one cheek and
spread slowly to the other and the fellow had his whole face again 

the women all three came in led by that ever-curious miss rawlins i
told them that the lady was gone up to consider of every thing that we
had hopes of her and such a representation we made of all that had
passed as brought either tacit or declared blame upon the fair perverse
for hardness of heart and over-delicacy 

the widow bevis in particular put out one lip tossed up her head 
wrinkled her forehead and made such motions with her now lifted-up now
cast-down eyes as showed that she thought there was a great deal of
perverseness and affectation in the lady now-and-then she changed her
censuring looks to looks of pity of me but as she said she loved not
to aggravate a poor business god help's shrugging up her shoulders 
to make such a rout about and then her eyes laughed heartily 
indulgence was a good thing love was a good thing but too much was
too much 

miss rawlins however declared after she had called the widow bevis 
with a prudish simper a comical gentlewoman that there must be
something in our story which she could not fathom and went from us into
a corner and sat down seemingly vexed that she could not 



letter xxxv

mr lovelace
 in continuation  


the lady staid longer above than we wished and i hoping that lady-like 
she only waited for an invitation to return to us desired the widow
bevis in the captain's name who wanted to go to town to request the
favour of her company 

i cared not to send up either miss rawlins or mrs moore on the errand 
lest my beloved should be in a communicative disposition especially as
she had hinted at an appeal to miss rawlins who besides has such an
unbounded curiosity 

mrs bevis presently returned with an answer winking and pinking at me 
that the lady would follow her down 

miss rawlins could not but offer to retire as the others did her eyes 
however intimated that she had rather stay but they not being answered
as she seemed to wish she went with the rest but with slower feet and
had hardly left the parlour when the lady entered it by the other door 
a melancholy dignity in her person and air 

she sat down pray mr tomlinson be seated 

he took his chair over against her i stood behind her's that i might
give him agreed-upon signals should there be occasion for them 

as thus a wink of the left eye was to signify push that point captain 

a wink of the right and a nod was to indicate approbation of what he
had said 

my fore-finger held up and biting my lip get off of that as fast as
possible 

a right-forward nod and a frown swear to it captain 

my whole spread hand to take care not to say too much on that particular
subject 

a scowling brow and a positive nod was to bid him rise in temper 

and these motions i could make even those with my hand without holding
up my arm or moving my wrist had the women been there as when the
motions were agreed upon i knew not but they would 

she hemmed i was going to speak to spare her supposed confusion but
this lady never wants presence of mind when presence of mind is
necessary either to her honour or to that conscious dignity which
distinguishes her from all the women i ever knew 

i have been considering said she as well as i was able of every thing
that has passed and of all that has been said and of my unhappy
situation i mean no ill i wish no ill to any creature living mr 
tomlinson i have always delighted to draw favourable rather than
unfavourable conclusions sometimes as it has proved for very bad
hearts censoriousness whatever faults i have is not naturally my
fault but circumstanced as i am treated as i have been unworthily
treated by a man who is full of contrivances and glories in them 

lovel my dearest life but i will not interrupt you 

cl thus treated it becomes me to doubt it concerns my honour to
doubt to fear to apprehend your intervention sir is so seasonable 
so kind for this man my uncle's expedient the first of the kind he
ever i believe thought of a plain honest good-minded man as he is 
not affecting such expedients your report in conformity to it the
consequences of that report the alarm taken by my brother his rash
resolution upon it the alarm taken by lady betty and the rest of mr 
lovelace's relations the sudden letters written to him upon it which 
with your's he showed me all ceremony among persons born observers of
ceremony and entitled to value themselves upon their distinction 
dispensed with all these things have happened so quick and some of them
so seasonable 

lovel lady betty you see madam in her letter dispenses with
punctilo avowedly in compliment to you charlotte in her's professes
to do the same for the same reason good heaven that the respect
intended you by my relations who in every other case are really
punctilious should be thus construed they were glad madam to have an
opportunity to compliment you at my expense every one of my family
takes delight in rallying me but their joy on the supposed occasion 

cl do i doubt sir that you have not something to say for any thing
you think fit to do i am speaking to captain tomlinson sir i will
you would be pleased to withdraw at least to come from behind my chair 

and she looked at the captain observing no doubt that his eyes seemed
to take lessons from mine 

a fair match by jupiter 

the captain was disconcerted the dog had not had such a blush upon his
face for ten years before i bit my lip for vexation walked about the
room but nevertheless took my post again and blinked with my eyes to
the captain as a caution for him to take more care of his and then
scouling with my brows and giving the nod positive i as good as said 
resent that captain 

capt i hope madam you have no suspicion that i am capable 

cl be not displeased with me captain tomlinson i have told you that
i am not of a suspicious temper excuse me for the sake of my sincerity 
there is not i will be bold to say a sincerer heart in the world than
her's before you 

she took out her handkerchief and put it to her eyes 

i was going at that instant after her example to vouch for the honesty
of my heart but my conscience mennelled upon me and would not suffer
the meditated vow to pass my lips a devilish thing thought i for a
man to be so little himself when he has most occasion for himself 

the villain tomlinson looked at me with a rueful face as if he begged
leave to cry for company it might have been as well if he had cried 
a feeling heart or the tokens of it given by a sensible eye are very
reputable things when kept in countenance by the occasion 

and here let me fairly own to thee that twenty times in this trying
conversation i said to myself that could i have thought that i should
have had all this trouble and incurred all this guilt i would have been
honest at first but why jack is this dear creature so lovely yet so
invincible ever heardst thou before that the sweets of may blossomed in
december 

capt be pleased be pleased madam if you have any doubts of my
honour 

a whining varlet he should have been quite angry for what gave i him
the nod positive he should have stalked again to the window as for his
whip and hat 

cl i am only making such observations as my youth my inexperience 
and my present unhappy circumstances suggest to me a worthy heart
 such i hope as captain tomlinson's need not fear an examination 
need not fear being looked into whatever doubts that man who has been
the cause of my errors and as my severe father imprecated the punisher
of the errors he has caused might have had of me or of my honour i
would have forgiven him for them if he had fairly proposed them to me 
for some doubts perhaps such a man might have of the future conduct of a
creature whom he could induce to correspond with him against parental
prohibition and against the lights which her own judgment threw in upon
her and if he had propounded them to me like a man and a gentleman i
would have been glad of the opportunity given me to clear my intentions 
and to have shown myself entitled to his good opinion and i hope you 
sir 

capt i am ready to hear all your doubts madam and to clear them up 

cl i will only put it sir to your conscience and honour 

the dog sat uneasy he shuffled with his feet her eye was upon him he
was therefore after the rebuff he had met with afraid to look at me
for my motions and now turned his eyes towards me then from me as if
he would unlook his own looks 

cl that all is true that you have written and that you have told me 

i gave him a right forward nod and a frown as much as to say swear to
it captain but the varlet did not round it off as i would have had
him however he averred that it was 

he had hoped he said that the circumstances with which his commission
was attended and what he had communicated to her which he could not
know but from his dear friend her uncle might have shielded him even
from the shadow of suspicion but i am contented said he stammering 
to be thought to be thought what what you please to think of me till 
till you are satisfied 

a whore's-bird 

cl the circumstances you refer to i must own ought to shield you 
sir from suspicion but the man before you is a man that would make an
angel suspected should that angel plead for him 

i came forward traversed the room was indeed in a bl dy passion i
have no patience madam and again i bit my unpersuasive lips 

cl no man ought to be impatient at imputations he is not ashamed to
deserve an innocent man will not be outrageous upon such imputations 
a guilty man ought not  most excellently would this charming creature
cap sentences with lord m   but i am not now trying you sir  to me  
on the foot of your merits i am only sorry that i am constrained to put
questions to this worthier gentleman  worthier gentleman jack   which 
perhaps i ought not to put so far as they regard himself and i hope 
captain tomlinson that you who know not mr lovelace so well as to my
unhappiness i do and who have children of your own will excuse a poor
young creature who is deprived of all worldly protection and who has
been insulted and endangered by the most designing man in the world and 
perhaps by a confederacy of his creatures 

there she stopt and stood up and looked at me fear nevertheless 
apparently mingled with her anger and so it ought i was glad 
however of this poor sign of love no one fears whom they value not 

women's tongues were licensed i was going to say but my conscience
would not let me call her a woman nor use to her so vulgar a phrase i
could only rave by my motions lift up my eyes spread my hands rub my
face pull my wig and look like a fool indeed i had a great mind to
run mad had i been alone with her i would and she should have taken
consequences 

the captain interposed in my behalf gently however and as a man not
quite sure that he was himself acquitted some of the pleas we had both
insisted on he again enforced and speaking low poor gentleman said
he who can but pity him indeed madam it is easy to see with all his
failings the power you have over him 

cl i have no pleasure sir in distressing any one not even him who
has so much distressed me but sir when i think and when i see him
before me i cannot command my temper indeed indeed captain
tomlinson mr lovelace has not acted by me either as a grateful or a
generous man nor even as a prudent one he knows not as i told him
yesterday the value of the heart he has insulted 

there the angel stopt her handkerchief at her eyes 

o belford belford that she should so greatly excel as to make me at
times appear as a villain in my own eyes 

i besought her pardon i promised that it should be the study of my
whole life to deserve it my faults i said whatever they had been 
were rather faults in her apprehension than in fact i besought her to
give way to the expedient i had hit upon i repeated it the captain
enforced it for her uncle's sake i once more for the sake of the
general reconciliation for the sake of all my family for the sake of
preventing further mischief 

she wept she seemed staggered in her resolution she turned from me 
i mentioned the letter of lord m i besought her to resign to lady
betty's mediation all our differences if she would not forgive me before
she saw her 

she turned towards me she was going to speak but her heart was full 
and again she turned away her eyes and do you really and indeed expect
lady betty and miss montague and do you again she stopt 

i answered in a solemn manner 

she turned from me her whole face and paused and seemed to consider 
but in a passionate accent again turning towards me  o how difficult 
jack for a harlowe spirit to forgive   let her ladyship come if she
pleases said she i cannot cannot wish to see her and if i did see
her and she were to plead for you i cannot wish to hear her the more
i think the less i can forgive an attempt that i am convinced was
intended to destroy me  a plaguy strong word for the occasion 
supposing she was right   what has my conduct been that an insult of
such a nature should be offered to me and it would be a weakness in me
to forgive i am sunk in my own eyes and how can i receive a visit
that must depress me more 

the captain urged her in my favour with greater earnestness than before 
we both even clamoured as i may say for mercy and forgiveness  didst
thou never hear the good folks talk of taking heaven by storm   
contrition repeatedly avowed a total reformation promised the happy
expedient again urged 

cl i have taken my measures i have gone too far to recede or to
wish to recede my mind is prepared for adversity that i have not
deserved the evils i have met with is my consolation i have written to
miss howe what my intentions are my heart is not with you it is
against you mr lovelace i had not written to you as i did in the
letter i left behind me had i not resolved whatever became of me to
renounce you for ever 

i was full of hope now severe as her expressions were i saw she was
afraid that i should think of what she had written and indeed her
letter is violence itself angry people jack should never write while
their passion holds 

lovel the severity you have shown me madam whether by pen or by
speech shall never have place in my remembrance but for your honor in
the light you have taken things all is deserved and but the natural
result of virtuous resentment and i adore you even for the pangs you
have given me 

she was silent she had employment enough with her handkerchief at her
eyes 

lovel you lament sometimes that you have no friends of your own sex
to consult with miss rawlins i must confess is too inquisitive to be
confided in  i liked not thou mayest think her appeal to miss
rawlins   she may mean well but i never in my life knew a person who
was fond of prying into the secrets of others that was fit to be
trusted the curiosity of such is governed by pride which is not
gratified but by whispering about a secret till it becomes public in
order to show either their consequence or their sagacity it is so in
every case what man or woman who is covetous of power or of making
a right use of it but in the ladies of my family you may confide it
is their ambition to think of you as one of themselves renew but your
consent to pass to the world for the sake of your uncle's expedient and
for the prevention of mischief as a lady some time married lady betty
may be acquainted with the naked truth and you may as she hopes you
will accompany her to her seat and if it must be so consider me as
in a state of penitence or probation to be accepted or rejected as i
may appear to deserve 

the captain again clapt his hands on his breast and declared upon his
honour that this was a proposal that were the case that of his own
daughter and she were not resolved upon immediate marriage which yet
he thought by far the more eligible choice he should be very much
concerned were she to refuse it 

cl were i with mr lovelace's relations and to pass as his wife to
the world i could not have any choice and how could he be then in a
state of probation o mr tomlinson you are too much his friend to see
into his drift 

capt his friend madam as i said before as i am your's and your
uncle's for the sake of a general reconciliation which must begin with
a better understanding between yourselves 

lovel only my dearest life resolve to attend the arrival and visit
of lady betty and permit her to arbitrate between us 

capt there can be no harm in that madam you can suffer no
inconvenience from that if mr lovelace's offence be such that a woman
of lady betty's character judges it to be unpardonable why then 

cl  interrupting and to me   if i am not invaded by you sir if i
am as i ought to be my own mistress i think to stay here in this
honest house  and then had i an eye-beam as the captain calls it 
flashed at me   till i receive a letter from miss howe that i hope 
will be in a day or two if in that time the ladies come whom you
expect and if they are desirous to see the creature whom you have made
unhappy i shall know whether i can or cannot receive their visit 

she turned short to the door and retiring went up stairs to her
chamber 

o sir said the captain as soon as she was gone what an angel of a
woman is this i have been and i am a very wicked man but if any
thing should happen amiss to this admirable lady through my means i
shall have more cause for self-reproach than for all the bad actions
of my life put together 

and his eyes glistened 

nothing can happen amiss thou sorrowful dog what can happen amiss 
are we to form our opinion of things by the romantic notions of a girl 
who supposes that to be the greatest which is the slightest of evils 
have i not told thee our whole story has she not broken her promise 
did i not generously spare her when in my power i was decent though
i had her at such advantage greater liberties have i taken with girls
of character at a common romping bout and all has been laughed off 
and handkerchief and head-clothes adjusted and petticoats shaken to
rights in my presence never man in the like circumstances and
resolved as i was resolved goaded on as i was goaded on as well by her
own sex as by the impulses of a violent passion was ever so decent 
yet what mercy does she show me 

now jack this pitiful dog was such another unfortunate one as thyself
 his arguments serving to confirm me in the very purpose he brought them
to prevail upon me to give up had he left me to myself to the
tenderness of my own nature moved as i was when the lady withdrew and
had he set down and made odious faces and said nothing it is very
possible that i should have taken the chair over against him which she
had quitted and have cried and blubbered with him for half an hour
together but the varlet to argue with me to pretend to convince a
man who knows in is heart that he is doing a wrong thing he must needs
think that this would put me upon trying what i could say for myself and
when the extended compunction can be carried from the heart to the lips
it must evaporate in words 

thou perhaps in this place wouldst have urged the same pleas that he
urged what i answered to him therefore may do for thee and spare thee
the trouble of writing and me of reading a good deal of nonsense 

capt you were pleased to tell me sir that you only proposed to try
her virtue and that you believed you should actually marry her 

lovel so i shall and cannot help it i have no doubt but i shall 
and as to trying her is she not now in the height of her trial have i
not reason to think that she is coming about is she not now yielding up
her resentment for an attempt which she thinks she ought not to forgive 
and if she do may she not forgive the last attempt can she in a word 
resent that more than she does this women often for their own sakes 
will keep the last secret but will ostentatiously din the ears of gods
and men with their clamours upon a successless offer it was my folly 
my weakness that i gave her not more cause for this her unsparing
violence 

capt o sir you will never be able to subdue this lady without force 

lovel well then puppy must i not endeavour to find a proper time
and place 

capt forgive me sir but can you think of force to such a fine
creature 

lovel force indeed i abhor the thought of and for what thinkest
thou have i taken all the pains i have taken and engaged so many
persons in my cause but to avoid the necessity of violent compulsion 
but yet imaginest thou that i expect direct consent from such a lover of
forms as this lady is known to be let me tell thee m'donald that thy
master belford has urged on thy side of the question all that thou
canst urge must i have every sorry fellow's conscience to pacify as
well as my own by my soul patrick she has a friend here  clapping my
hand on my breast   that pleads for her with greater and more
irresistible eloquence than all the men in the world can plead for her 
and had she not escaped me and yet how have i answered my first design
of trying her and in her the virtue of the most virtuous of the sex 
perseverance man perseverance what wouldst thou have me decline a
trial that they make for the honour of a sex we all so dearly love 


 see vol iii letter xviii 


then sir you have no thoughts no thoughts  looking still more
sorrowfully   of marrying this wonderful lady 

yes yes patrick but i have but let me first to gratify my pride 
bring down her's let me see that she loves me well enough to forgive
me for my own sake has she not heretofore lamented that she staid not
in her father's house though the consequence must have been if she had 
that she would have been the wife of the odious solmes if now she be
brought to consent to be mine seest thou not that the reconciliation
with her detested relations is the inducement as it always was and not
love of me neither her virtue nor her love can be established but upon
full trial the last trial but if her resistance and resentment be such
as hitherto i have reason to expect they will be and if i find in that
resentment less of hatred of me than of the fact then shall she be mine
in her own way then hateful as is the life of shackles to me will i
marry her 

well sir i can only say that i am dough in your hands to be moulded
into what shape you please but if as i said before 

none of thy said-before's patrick i remember all thou saidst and i
know all thou canst farther say thou art only pontius pilate like 
washing thine own hands don't i know thee that thou mayest have
something to silence thy conscience with by loading me but we have gone
too far to recede are not all our engines in readiness dry up thy
sorrowful eyes let unconcern and heart's ease once more take possession
of thy solemn features thou hast hitherto performed extremely well 
shame not thy past by thy future behaviour and a rich reward awaits
thee if thou art dough be dough and i slapt him on the shoulder 
resume but thy former shape and i'll be answerable for the event 

he bowed assent and compliance went to the glass and began to untwist
and unsadden his features pulled his wig right as if that as well as
his head and heart had been discomposed by his compunction and once more
became old lucifer's and mine 

but didst thou think jack that there was so much what-shall-i-call-it 
 in this tomlinson didst thou imagine that such a fellow as that had
bowels that nature so long dead and buried in him as to all humane
effects should thus revive and exert itself yet why do i ask this
question of thee who to my equal surprise hast shown on the same
occasion the like compassionate sensibilities 

as to tomlinson it looks as if poverty had made him the wicked fellow he
is as plenty and wantonness have made us what we are necessity after
all is the test of principle but what is there in this dull word or
thing called honesty that even i who cannot in my present views be
served by it cannot help thinking even the accidental emanations of it
amiable in tomlinson though demonstrated in a female case and judging
better of him for being capable of such 



letter xxxvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


this debate between the captain and me was hardly over when the three
women led by miss rawlins entered hoping no intrusion but very
desirous the maiden said to know if we were likely to accommodate 

o yes i hope so you know ladies that your sex must in these cases 
preserve their forms they must be courted to comply with their own
happiness a lucky expedient we have hit upon the uncle has his doubts
of our marriage he cannot believe nor will any body that it is
possible that a man so much in love the lady so desirable 

they all took the hint it was a very extraordinary case the two widows
allowed women jack  as i believe i have observed elsewhere   have a
high opinion of what they can do for us miss rawlins desired if i
pleased to let them know the expedient and looked as if there was no
need to proceed in the rest of my speech 


 see letter xxiv of this volume 


i begged that they would not let the lady know i had told them what this
expedient was and they should hear it 

they promised 

it was this that to oblige and satisfy mr harlowe the ceremony was to
be again performed he was to be privately present and to give his
niece to me with his own hands and she was retired to consider of it 

thou seest jack that i have provided an excuse to save my veracity to
the women here in case i should incline to marriage and she should
choose to have miss rawlins's assistance at the ceremony nor doubted i
to bring my fair-one to save my credit on this occasion if i could get
her to consent to be mine 

a charming expedient cried the widow they were all three ready to clap
their hands for joy upon it women love to be married twice at least 
jack though not indeed to the same man and all blessed the
reconciliatory scheme and the proposer of it and supposing it came from
the captain they looked at him with pleasure while his face shined with
the applause implied he should think himself very happy if he could
bring about a general reconciliation and he flourished with his head
like my man will on his victory over old grimes bridling by turns like
miss rawlins in the height of a prudish fit 

but now it was time for the captain to think of returning to town having
a great deal of business to dispatch before morning nor was he certain
that he should be able again to attend us at hampstead before he went
home 

and yet as every thing was drawing towards a crisis i did not intend
that he should leave hampstead that night 

a message to the above effect was carried up at my desire by mrs 
moore with the captain's compliments and to know if she had any
commands for him to her uncle 

but i hinted to the women that it would be proper for them to withdraw 
if the lady did come down lest she should not care to be so free before
them on a proposal so particular as she would be to us who had offered
it to her consideration 

mrs moore brought down word that the lady was following her they all
three withdrew and she entered at one door as they went out at the
other 

the captain accosted her repeating the contents of the message sent up 
and desired that she would give him her commands in relation to the
report he was to make to her uncle harlowe 

i know not what to say sir nor what i would have you to say to my
uncle perhaps you may have business in town perhaps you need not see my
uncle till i have heard from miss howe till after lady betty i don't
know what to say 

i implored the return of that value which she had so generously
acknowledged once to have had for me i presumed i said to flatter
myself that lady betty in her own person and in the name of all my
family would be able on my promised reformation and contrition to
prevail in my favour especially as our prospects in other respects with
regard to the general reconciliation wished for were so happy but let
me owe to your own generosity my dearest creature said i rather than
to the mediation of any person on earth the forgiveness i am an humble
suitor for how much more agreeable to yourself o best beloved of my
soul must it be as well as obliging to me that your first personal
knowledge of my relations and theirs of you for they will not be
denied attending you should not be begun in recriminations in appeals 
as lady betty will be here soon it will not perhaps be possible for you
to receive her visit with a brow absolutely serene but dearest 
dearest creature i beseech you let the misunderstanding pass as a
slight one as a misunderstanding cleared up appeals give pride and
superiority to the persons appealed to and are apt to lessen the
appellant not only in their eye but in her own exalt not into judges
those who are prepared to take lessons and instructions from you the
individuals of my family are as proud as i am said to be but they will
cheerfully resign to your superiority you will be the first woman of the
family in every one's eyes 

this might have done with any other woman in the world but this and yet
she is the only woman in the world of whom it may with truth be said 
but thus angrily did she disclaim the compliment 

yes indeed  and there she stopt a moment her sweet bosom heaving with
a noble disdain  cheated out of myself from the very first a fugitive
from my own family renounced by my relations insulted by you laying
humble claim to the protection of your's is not this the light in which
i must appear not only to the ladies of your family but to all the
world think you sir that in these circumstances or even had i been
in the happiest that i could be affected by this plea of undeserved
superiority you are a stranger to the mind of clarissa harlowe if you
think her capable of so poor and so undue a pride 

she went from us to the farther end of the room 

the captain was again affected excellent creature i called her and 
reverently approaching her urged farther the plea i had last made 

it is but lately said i that the opinions of my relations have been
more than indifferent to me whether good or bad and it is for your
sake more than for my own that i now wish to stand well with my whole
family the principal motive of lady betty's coming up is to purchase
presents for the whole family to make on the happy occasion 

this consideration turning to the captain with so noble-minded a dear
creature i know can have no weight only as it will show their value
and respect but what a damp would their worthy hearts receive were
they to find their admired new niece as they now think her not only not
their niece but capable of renouncing me for ever they love me they
all love me i have been guilty of carelessness and levity to them 
indeed but of carelessness and levity only and that owing to a pride
that has set me above meanness though it has not done every thing for
me 

my whole family will be guaranties for my good behaviour to this dear
creature their niece their daughter their cousin their friend their
chosen companion and directress all in one upon my soul captain we
may we must be happy 

but dearest dearest creature let me on my knees  and down i dropt her
face all the time turned half from me as she stood at the window her
handkerchief often at her eyes  on my knees let me plead your promised
forgiveness and let us not appear to them on their visit thus unhappy
with each other lady betty the next hour that she sees you will write
her opinion of you and of the likelihood of our future happiness to
lady sarah her sister a weak-spirited woman who now hopes to supply to
herself in my bride the lost daughter she still mourns for 

the captain then joined in and re-urged her uncle's hopes and
expectations and his resolution effectually to set about the general
reconciliation the mischief that might be prevented and the certainty
that there was that her uncle might be prevailed on to give her to me
with his own hand if she made it her choice to wait for his coming up 
but for his own part he humbly advised and fervently pressed her to
make the very next day or monday at farthest my happy day 

permit me dearest lady said he and i could kneel to you myself 
 bending his knee   though i have no interest in my earnestness but the
pleasure i should have to be able to serve you all to beseech you to
give me an opportunity to assure your uncle that i myself saw with my own
eyes the happy knot tied all misunderstandings all doubts all
diffidences will then be at an end 

and what madam rejoined i still kneeling can there be in your new
measures be they what they will that can so happily so reputably i
will presume to say for all around obviate the present difficulties 

miss howe herself if she love you and if she love your fame madam 
urged the captain his knee still bent must congratulate you on such
happy conclusion 

then turning her face she saw the captain half-kneeling o sir o capt 
tomlinson why this undue condescension extending her hand to his
elbow to raise him i cannot bear this then casting her eye on me 
rise mr lovelace kneel not to the poor creature whom you have
insulted how cruel the occasion for it and how mean the submission 

not mean to such an angel nor can i rise but to be forgiven 

the captain then re-urged once more the day he was amazed he said if
she ever valued me 

o captain tomlinson interrupted she how much are you the friend of this
man if i had never valued him he never would have had it in his power
to insult me nor could i if i had never regarded him have taken to
heart as i do the insult execrable as it was so undeservedly so
ungratefully given but let him retire for a moment let him retire 

i was more than half afraid to trust the captain by himself with her he
gave me a sign that i might depend upon him and then i took out of my
pocket his letter to me and lady betty's and miss montague's and lord
m s letters which last she had not then seen and giving them to him 
procure for me in the first place mr tomlinson a re-perusal of these
three letters and of this from lord m and i beseech you my dearest
life give them due consideration and let me on my return find the happy
effects of that consideration 

i then withdrew with slow feet however and a misgiving heart 

the captain insisted upon this re-perusal previously to what she had to
say to him as he tells me she complied but with some difficulty as
if she were afraid of being softened in my favour 

she lamented her unhappy situation destitute of friends and not knowing
whither to go or what to do she asked questions sifting-questions 
about her uncle about her family and after what he knew of mr 
hickman's fruitless application in her favour 

he was well prepared in this particular for i had shown him the letters
and extracts of letter of miss howe which i had so happily come at 
might she be assured she asked him that her brother with singleton and
solmes were actually in quest of her 


 vol iv letter xliv 


he averred that they were 

she asked if he thought i had hopes of prevailing on her to go back to
town 

he was sure i had not 

was he really of opinion that lady betty would pay her a visit 

he had no doubt of it 

but sir but captain tomlinson  impatiently turning from him and
again to him  i know not what to do but were i your daughter sir were
you my own father alas sir i have neither father nor mother 

he turned from her and wiped his eyes 

o sir you have humanity  she wept too   there are some men in the
world thank heaven that can be moved o sir i have met with hard-
hearted men in my own family too or i could not have been so unhappy
as i am but i make every body unhappy 

his eyes no doubt ran over 

dearest madam heavenly lady who can who can hesitated and blubbered
the dog as he owned and indeed i heard some part of what passed 
though they both talked lower than i wished for from the nature of
their conversation there was no room for altitudes 

them and both and they how it goes against me to include this angel
of a creature and any man on earth but myself in one world 

capt who can forbear being affected but madam you can be no other
man's 

cl nor would i be but he is so sunk with me to fire the house an
artifice so vile contrived for the worst of purposes would you have a
daughter of your's but what would i say yet you see that i have nobody
in whom i can confide mr lovelace is a vindictive man he could not
love the creature whom he could insult as he has insulted me 

she paused and then resuming in short i never never can forgive him 
nor he me do you think sir i never would have gone so far as i have
gone if i had intended ever to draw with him in one yoke i left behind
me such a letter 

you know madam he has acknowledged the justice of your resentment 

o sir he can acknowledge and he can retract fifty times a day but do
not think i am trifling with myself and you and want to be persuaded to
forgive him and to be his there is not a creature of my sex who would
have been more explicit and more frank than i would have been from the
moment i intended to be his had i a heart like my own to deal with i
was always above reserve sir i will presume to say where i had no
cause of doubt mr lovelace's conduct has made me appear perhaps 
over-nice when my heart wanted to be encouraged and assured and when 
if it had been so my whole behaviour would have been governed by it 

she stopt her handkerchief at her eyes 

i inquired after the minutest part of her behaviour as well as after her
words i love thou knowest to trace human nature and more
particularly female nature through its most secret recesses 

the pitiful fellow was lost in silent admiration of her and thus the
noble creature proceeded 

it is the fate in unequal unions that tolerable creatures through them 
frequently incur censure when more happily yoked they might be entitled
to praise and shall i not shun a union with a man that might lead into
errors a creature who flatters herself that she is blest with an
inclination to be good and who wishes to make every one happy with whom
she has any connection even to her very servants 

she paused taking a turn about the room the fellow devil fetch him a
mummy all the time then proceeded 

formerly indeed i hoped to be an humble mean of reforming him but 
when i have no such hope is it right  you are a serious man sir  to
make a venture that shall endanger my own morals 

still silent was the varlet if my advocate had nothing to say for me 
what hope of carrying my cause 

and now sir what is the result of all it is this that you will
endeavour if you have that influence over him which a man of your sense
and experience ought to have to prevail upon him and that for his own
sake as well as for mine to leave me free to pursue my own destiny 
and of this you may assure him that i will never be any other man's 

impossible madam i know that mr lovelace would not hear me with
patience on such a topic and i do assure you that i have some spirit 
and should not care to take an indignity from him or from any man living 

she paused then resuming and think you sir that my uncle will refuse
to receive a letter from me  how averse jack to concede a tittle in
my favour  

i know madam as matters are circumstanced that he would not answer it 
if you please i will carry one down from you 

and will he not pursue his intentions in my favour nor be himself
reconciled to me except i am married 

from what your brother gives out and effects to believe on mr 
lovelace's living with you in the same 

no more sir i am an unhappy creature 

he then re-urged that it would be in her power instantly or on the
morrow to put an end to all her difficulties 

how can that be said she the license still to be obtained the
settlements still to be signed miss howe's answer to my last
unreceived and shall i sir be in such a hurry as if i thought my
honour in danger if i delayed yet marry the man from whom only it can
be endangered unhappy thrice unhappy clarissa harlowe in how many
difficulties has one rash step involved thee and she turned from him
and wept 

the varlet by way of comfort wept too yet her tears as he might have
observed were tears that indicated rather a yielding than a perverse
temper 

there is a sort of stone thou knowest so soft in the quarry that it
may in manner be cut with a knife but if the opportunity not be taken 
and it is exposed to the air for any time it will become as hard as
marble and then with difficulty it yields to the chisel so this lady 
not taken at the moment after a turn or two across the room gained more
resolution and then she declared as she had done once before that she
would wait the issue of miss howe's answer to the letter she had sent her
from hence and take her measures accordingly leaving it to him mean
time to make what report he thought fit to her uncle the kindest that
truth could bear she doubted not from captain tomlinson and she should
be glad of a few lines from him to hear what that was 


 the nature of the bath stone in particular 


she wished him a good journey she complained of her head and was about
to withdraw but i stept round to the door next the stairs as if i had
but just come in from the garden which as i entered i called a very
pretty one and took her reluctant hand as she was going out my dearest
life you are not going what hopes captain have you not some hopes
to give me of pardon and reconciliation 

she said she would not be detained but i would not let her go till she
had promised to return when the captain had reported to me what her
resolution was 

and when he had i sent up and claimed her promise and she came down
again and repeated as what she was determined upon that she would wait
for miss howe's answers to the letter she had written to her and take
her measures according to its contents 

i expostulated with her upon it in the most submissive and earnest
manner she made it necessary for me to repeat many of the pleas i had
before urged the captain seconded me with equal earnestness at last 
each fell down on our knees before her 

she was distressed i was afraid at one time she would have fainted 
yet neither of us would rise without some concessions i pleaded my own
sake the captain his dear friend her uncle's and both re-pleaded the
prevention of future mischief and the peace and happiness of the two
families 

she owned herself unequal to the conflict she sighed she sobbed she
wept she wrung her hands 

i was perfectly eloquent in my vows and protestations her tearful eyes
were cast down upon me a glow upon each charming cheek a visible
anguish in every lovely feature at last her trembling knees seemed to
fail her she dropt into the next chair her charming face as if seeking
for a hiding place which a mother's bosom would have best supplied 
sinking upon her own shoulder 

i forgot at the instant all my vows of revenge i threw myself at her
feet as she sat and snatching her hand pressed it with my lips i
besought heaven to forgive my past offences and prosper my future hopes 
as i designed honourably and justly by the charmer of my heart if once
more she should restore me to her favour and i thought i felt drops of
scalding water  could they be tears   trickle down upon my cheeks while
my cheeks glowing like fire seemed to scorch up the unwelcome
strangers 

i then arose not doubting of an implied pardon in this silent distress 
i raised the captain i whispered him by my soul man i am in earnest 
 now talk of reconciliation of her uncle of the license of settlement
 and raising my voice if now at last captain tomlinson my angel will
give me leave to call so great a blessing mine it will be impossible
that you should say too much to her uncle in praise of my gratitude my
affection and fidelity to his charming niece and he may begin as soon
as he pleases his kind schemes for effecting the desirable
reconciliation nor shall he prescribe any terms to me that i will not
comply with 

the captain blessed me with his eyes and hands thank god whispered he 
we approached the lady together 

capt what hinders dearest madam what now hinders but that lady
betty lawrance when she comes may be acquainted with the truth of every
thing and that then she may assist privately at your nuptials i will
stay till they are celebrated and then shall go down with the happy
tidings to my dear mr harlowe and all will all must soon be happy 

i must have an answer from miss howe replied the still trembling fair-
one i cannot change my new measures but with her advice i will
forfeit all my hopes of happiness in this world rather than forfeit her
good opinion and that she should think me giddy unsteady or
precipitate all i shall further say on the present subject is this 
that when i have her answer to what i have written i will write to her
the whole state of the matter as i shall then be enabled to do 

lovel then must i despair for ever o captain tomlinson miss howe
hates me miss howe 

capt not so perhaps when miss howe knows your concern for having
offended she will never advise that with such prospects of general
reconciliation the hopes of so many considerable persons in both
families should be frustrated some little time as this excellent
lady had foreseen and hinted will necessarily be taken up in actually
procuring the license and in perusing and signing the settlements in
that time miss howe's answer may be received and lady betty may arrive 
and she no doubt will have weight to dissipate the lady's doubts and
to accelerate the day it shall be my part mean time to make mr 
harlowe easy all i fear is from mr james harlowe's quarter and
therefore all must be conducted with prudence and privacy as your uncle 
madam has proposed 

she was silent i rejoiced in her silence the dear creature thought i 
has actually forgiven me in her heart but why will she not lay me under
obligation to her by the generosity of an explicit declaration and
yet as that would not accelerate any thing while the license is not in
my hands she is the less to be blamed if i do her justice for taking
more time to descend 

i proposed as on the morrow night to go to town and doubted not to
bring the license up with me on monday morning would she be pleased to
assure me that she would not depart form mrs moore's 

she should stay at mrs moore's till she had an answer from miss howe 

i told her that i hoped i might have her tacit consent at least to the
obtaining of the license 

i saw by the turn of her countenance that i should not have asked this
question she was so far from tacitly consenting that she declared to
the contrary 

as i never intended i said to ask her to enter again into a house with
the people of which she was so much offended would she be pleased to
give orders for her clothes to be brought up hither or should dorcas
attend her for any of her commands on that head 

she desired not ever more to see any body belonging to that house she
might perhaps get mrs moore or mrs bevis to go thither for her and
take her keys with them 

i doubted not i said that lady betty would arrive by that time i
hoped she had no objection to my bringing that lady and my cousin
montague up with me 

she was silent 

to be sure mr lovelace said the captain the lady can have no
objection to this 

she was still silent so silence in this case was assent 

would she be pleased to write to miss howe 

sir sir peevishly interrupting no more questions no prescribing to me
 you will do as you think fit so will i as i please i own no
obligation to you captain tomlinson your servant recommend me to my
uncle harlowe's favour and was going 

i took her reluctant hand and besought her only to promise to meet me
early in the morning 

to what purpose meet you have you more to say than has been said i
have had enough of vows and protestations mr lovelace to what purpose
should i meet you to-morrow morning 

i repeated my request and that in the most fervent manner naming six in
the morning 

you know that i am always stirring before that hour at this season of
the year  was the half-expressed consent 

she then again recommended herself to her uncle's favour and withdrew 

and thus belford has she mended her markets as lord m would say and
i worsted mine miss howe's next letter is now the hinge on which the
fate of both must turn i shall be absolutely ruined and undone if i
cannot intercept it 


contents of volume vi


letter i ii lovelace to belford 
his conditional promise to tomlinson in the lady's favour his pleas
and arguments on their present situation and on his darling and
hitherto-baffled views his whimsical contest with his conscience his
latest adieu to it his strange levity which he calls gravity on the
death of belford's uncle 

letter iii iv from the same 
she favours him with a meeting in the garden her composure her
conversation great and noble but will not determine any thing in his
favour it is however evident he says that she has still some
tenderness for him his reasons an affecting scene between them her
ingenuousness and openness of heart she resolves to go to church but
will not suffer him to accompany her thither his whimsical debate with
the god of love whom he introduced as pleading for the lady 

letter v vi vii from the same 
he has got the wished-for letter from miss howe informs him of the
manner of obtaining it his remarks upon it observations on female
friendships comparison between clarissa and miss howe 

letter viii from the same 
another conversation with the lady his plausible arguments to re-obtain
her favour ineffectual his pride piqued his revenge incited new
arguments in favour of his wicked prospects his notice that a license
is actually obtained 

letter ix x from the same 
copy of the license with his observations upon it his scheme for
annual marriages he is preparing with lady betty and miss montague to
wait upon clarissa who these pretended ladies are how dressed they
give themselves airs of quality humourously instructs them how to act
up their assumed characters 

letter xi xii lovelace to belford 
once more is the charmer of his soul in her old lodgings brief account
of the horrid imposture steels his heart by revengeful recollections 
her agonizing apprehensions temporary distraction is ready to fall
into fits but all her distress all her prayers her innocence her
virtue cannot save her from the most villanous outrage 

letter xiii belford to lovelace 
vehemently inveighs against him grieves for the lady is now convinced
that there must be a world after this to do justice to injured merit 
beseeches him if he be a man and not a devil to do all the poor
justice now in his power 

letter xiv lovelace to belford 
regrets that he ever attempted her aims at extenuation does he not
see that he has journeyed on to this stage with one determined point in
view from the first she is at present stupified he says 

letter xv from the same 
the lady's affecting behaviour in her delirium he owns that art has
been used to her begins to feel remorse 

letter xvi from the same 
the lady writes upon scraps of paper which she tears and throws under
the table copies of ten of these rambling papers and of a letter to
him most affectingly incoherent he attempts farther to extenuate his
villany tries to resume his usual levity and forms a scheme to decoy
the people at hampstead to the infamous woman's in town the lady seems
to be recovering 

letter xvii from the same 
she attempts to get away in his absence is prevented by the odious
sinclair he exults in the hope of looking her into confusion when he
sees her is told by dorcas that she is coming into the dining-room to
find him out 

letter xviii from the same 
a high scene of her exalted and of his depressed behaviour offers to
make her amends by matrimony she treats his offer with contempt 
afraid belford plays him false 

letter xix from the same 
wishes he had never seen her with all the women he had known till now 
it was once subdued and always subdued his miserable dejection his
remorse she attempts to escape a mob raised his quick invention to
pacify it out of conceit with himself and his contrivances 

letter xx xxi lovelace to belford 
lord m very ill his presence necessary at m hall puts dorcas upon
ingratiating herself with her lady he re-urges marriage to her she
absolutely from the most noble motives rejects him 

letter xxii from the same 
reflects upon himself it costs he says more pain to be wicked than to
be good the lady's solemn expostulation with him extols her greatness
of soul dorcas coming into favour with her he is alarmed by another
attempt of the lady to get off she is in agonies at being prevented 
he tried to intimidate her dorcas pleads for her on the point of
drawing his sword against himself the occasion 

letter xxiii from the same 
cannot yet persuade himself but the lady will be his reasons for his
opinion opens his heart to belford as to his intentions by her 
mortified that she refuses his honest vows her violation but notional 
her triumph greater than her sufferings her will unviolated he is a
better man he says than most rakes and why 

letter xxiv xxv from the same 
the lady gives a promissory note to dorcas to induce her to further her
escape a fair trial of skill now he says a conversation between the
vile dorcas and her lady in which she engages her lady's pity the
bonds of wickedness stronger than the ties of virtue observations on
that subject 

letter xxvi xxvii xxviii from the same 
a new contrivance to advantage of the lady's intended escape a letter
from tomlinson intent of it he goes out to give opportunity for the
lady to attempt an escape his designs frustrated 

letter xxix from the same 
an interesting conversation between the lady and him no concession in
his favour by his soul he swears this dear girl gives the lie to all
their rakish maxims he has laid all the sex under obligation to him 
and why 

letter xxx lovelace to belford 
lord m in extreme danger the family desire his presence he
intercepts a severe letter from miss howe to her friend copy of it 

letter xxxi from the same 
the lady suspecting dorcas tries to prevail upon him to give her her
liberty she disclaims vengeance and affectingly tells him all her
future views denied she once more attempts an escape prevented and
terrified with apprehensions of instant dishonour she is obliged to make
some concession 

letter xxxii from the same 
accuses her of explaining away her concession made desperate he seeks
occasion to quarrel with her she exerts a spirit which overawes him 
he is ridiculed by the infamous copartnership calls to belford to help
a gay heart to a little of his dismal on the expected death of lord m 

letter xxxiii from the same 
another message from m hall to engage him to go down the next morning 

letter xxxiv xxxv from the same 
the women's instigations his farther schemes against the lady what 
he asks is the injury which a church-rite will not at any time repair 

letter xxxvi from the same 
himself the mother her nymphs all assembled with intent to execute his
detestable purposes her glorious behaviour on the occasion he
execrates detests despises himself and admires her more than ever 
obliged to set out early that morning for m hall he will press her with
letters to meet him next thursday her uncle's birthday at the altar 

letter xxxvii xxxviii xxxix lovelace to clarissa from m hall 
urging her accordingly the license in her hands by the most engaging
pleas and arguments 

letter xl lovelace to belford 
begs he will wait on the lady and induce her to write but four words to
him signifying the church and the day is now resolved on wedlock 
curses his plots and contrivances which all end he says in one grand
plot upon himself 

letter xli belford to lovelace in answer 
refuses to undertake for him unless he can be sure of his honour why
he doubts it 

letter xlii lovelace in reply 
curses him for scrupulousness is in earnest to marry after one more
letter of entreaty to her if she keep sullen silence she must take the
consequence 

letter xliii lovelace to clarissa 
once more earnestly entreats her to meet him at the altar not to be
forbidden coming he will take for leave to come 

letter xliv lovelace to patrick m'donald 
ordering him to visit the lady and instructing him what to say and how
to behave to her 

letter xlv to the same as captain tomlinson 
calculated to be shown to the lady as in confidence 

letter xlvi m'donald to lovelace 
goes to attend the lady according to direction finds the house in an
uproar and the lady escaped 

letter xlvii mowbray to lovelace 
with the same news 

letter xlviii belford to lovelace 
ample particulars of the lady's escape makes serious reflections on the
distress she must be in and on his lovelace's ungrateful usage of her 
what he takes the sum of religion 

letter xlix lovelace to belford 
runs into affected levity and ridicule yet at last owns all his gayety
but counterfeit regrets his baseness to the lady inveighs against the
women for their instigations will still marry her if she can be found
out one misfortune seldom comes alone lord m is recovering he had
bespoken mourning for him 

letter l clarissa to miss howe 
writes with incoherence to inquire after her health lets her know
whither to direct to her but forgets in her rambling her private
address by which means her letter falls into the hands of miss howe's
mother 

letter li mrs howe to clarissa 
reproaches her for making all her friends unhappy forbids her to write
any more to her daughter 

letter lii clarissa's meek reply 

letter liii clarissa to hannah burton 

letter liv hannah burton in answer 

letter lv clarissa to miss norton 
excuses her long silence asks her a question with a view to detect
lovelace hints at his ungrateful villany self-recrimination 

letter lvi mrs norton to clarissa 
answers her question inveighs against lovelace hopes she has escaped
with her honour consoles her by a brief relation of her own case and
from motives truly pious 

letter lvii clarissa to lady betty lawrance 
requests an answer to three questions with a view farther to detect
lovelace 

letter lviii lady betty to clarissa 
answers her questions in the kindest manner offers to mediate between
her nephew and her 

letter lix lx clarissa to mrs hodges 
her uncle harlowe's housekeeper with a view of still farther detecting
lovelace mrs hodges's answer 

letter lxi clarissa to lady betty lawrance 
acquaints her with her nephew's baseness charitably wishes his
reformation but utterly and from principle rejects him 

letter lxii clarissa to mrs norton 
is comforted by her kind soothings wishes she had been her child will
not allow her to come up to her why some account of the people she is
with and of a worthy woman mrs lovick who lodges in the house 
briefly hints to her the vile usage she has received from lovelace 

letter lxiii mrs norton to clarissa 
inveighs against lovelace wishes miss howe might be induced to refrain
from freedoms that do hurt and can do no good farther piously consoles
her 

letter lxiv clarissa to mrs norton 
a new trouble an angry letter from miss howe the occasion her heart
is broken shall be uneasy till she can get her father's curse revoked 
casts about to whom she can apply for this purpose at last resolves to
write to her sister to beg her mediation 

letter lxv miss howe to clarissa 
her angry and reproachful letter above-mentioned demands from her the
clearing up of her conduct 

letter lxvi clarissa to miss howe 
gently remonstrates upon her severity to this hour knows not all the
methods taken to deceive and ruin her but will briefly yet
circumstantially enter into the darker part of her sad story though her
heart sinks under the thoughts of a recollection so painful 

letter lxvii lxviii lxix lxx from the same 
she gives the promised particulars of her story begs that the blackest
parts of it may be kept secret and why desires one friendly tear and
no more may be dropt from her gentle eye on the happy day that shall
shut up all her sorrows 

letter lxxi lxxii miss howe to clarissa 
execrates the abandoned profligate she must she tells her look to the
world beyond this for her reward unravels some of lovelace's plots and
detects his forgeries is apprehensive for her own as well as clarissa's
safety advises her to pursue a legal vengeance laudable custom in the
isle of man offers personally to attend her in a court of justice 

letter lxxiii clarissa to miss howe 
cannot consent to a prosecution discovers who it was that personated
her at hampstead she is quite sick of life and of an earth in which
innocent and benevolent spirits are sure to be considered as aliens 




the history

of

clarissa harlowe



letter i

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sat midnight 


no rest says a text that i once heard preached upon to the wicked and
i cannot close my eyes yet only wanted to compound for half an hour in
an elbow-chair so must scribble on 

i parted with the captain after another strong debate with him in
relation to what is to be the fate of this lady as the fellow has an
excellent head and would have made an eminent figure in any station of
life had not his early days been tainted with a deep crime and he
detected in it and as he had the right side of the argument i had a
good deal of difficulty with him and at last brought myself to promise 
that if i could prevail upon her generously to forgive me and to
reinstate me in her favour i would make it my whole endeavour to get off
of my contrivances as happily as i could only that lady betty and
charlotte must come and then substituting him for her uncle's proxy 
take shame to myself and marry 

but if i should jack with the strongest antipathy to the state that
ever man had what a figure shall i make in rakish annals and can i
have taken all this pains for nothing or for a wife only that however
excellent  and any woman do i think i could make good because i could
make any woman fear as well as love me   might have been obtained without
the plague i have been at and much more reputably than with it and
hast thou not seen that this haughty woman  forgive me that i call her
haughty and a woman yet is she not haughty   knows not how to forgive
with graciousness indeed has not at all forgiven me but holds my soul
in a suspense which has been so grievous to her own 

at this silent moment i think that if i were to pursue my former
scheme and resolve to try whether i cannot make a greater fault serve as
a sponge to wipe out the less and then be forgiven for that i can
justify myself to myself and that as the fair invincible would say is
all in all 

as it is my intention in all my reflections to avoid repeating at
least dwelling upon what i have before written to thee though the state
of the case may not have varied so i would have thee to re-consider the
old reasonings particularly those contained in my answer to thy last 
expostulatory nonsense and add the new as they fall from my pen and
then i shall think myself invincible at least as arguing rake to rake 


 see vol v letter xiv 


i take the gaining of this lady to be essential to my happiness and is
it not natural for all men to aim at obtaining whatever they think will
make them happy be the object more or less considerable in the eyes of
others 

as to the manner of endeavouring to obtain her by falsification of
oaths vows and the like do not the poets of two thousand years and
upwards tell us that jupiter laughs at the perjuries of lovers and let
me add to what i have heretofore mentioned on that head a question or
two 

do not the mothers the aunts the grandmothers the governesses of the
pretty innocents always from their very cradles to riper years preach
to them the deceitfulness of men that they are not to regard their
oaths vows promises what a parcel of fibbers would all these reverend
matrons be if there were not now and then a pretty credulous rogue taken
in for a justification of their preachments and to serve as a beacon
lighted up for the benefit of the rest 

do we not then see that an honest prowling fellow is a necessary evil on
many accounts do we not see that it is highly requisite that a sweet
girl should be now-and-then drawn aside by him and the more eminent the
girl in the graces of person mind and fortune is not the example
likely to be the more efficacious 

if these postulata be granted me who i pray can equal my charmer in
all these who therefore so fit for an example to the rest of her sex 
 at worst i am entirely within my worthy friend mandeville's assertion 
that private vices are public benefits 

well then if this sweet creature must fall as it is called for the
benefit of all the pretty fools of the sex she must and there's an end
of the matter and what would there have been in it of uncommon or rare 
had i not been so long about it and so i dismiss all further
argumentation and debate upon the question and i impose upon thee when
thou writest to me an eternal silence on this head 


wafer'd on as an after-written introduction to the paragraphs which
follow marked with turned commas  thus   

lord jack what shall i do now how one evil brings on another 
dreadful news to tell thee while i was meditating a simple robbery 
here have i in my own defence indeed been guilty of murder a bl y
murder so i believe it will prove at her last gasp poor impertinent
opposer eternally resisting eternally contradicting there she lies
weltering in her blood her death's wound have i given her but she was
a thief an impostor as well as a tormentor she had stolen my pen 
while i was sullenly meditating doubting as to my future measures she
stole it and thus she wrote with it in a hand exactly like my own and
would have faced me down that it was really my own hand-writing 

but let me reflect before it is too late on the manifold perfections
of this ever-amiable creature let me reflect the hand yet is only held
up the blow is not struck miss howe's next letter may blow thee up 
in policy thou shouldest be now at least honest thou canst not live
without her thou wouldest rather marry her than lose her absolutely 
thou mayest undoubtedly prevail upon her inflexible as she seems to be 
for marriage but if now she finds thee a villain thou mayest never
more engage her attention and she perhaps will refuse and abhor thee 

yet already have i not gone too far like a repentant thief afraid of
his gang and obliged to go on in fear of hanging till he comes to be
hanged i am afraid of the gang of my cursed contrivances 

as i hope to live i am sorry at the present writing that i have
been such a foolish plotter as to put it as i fear i have done out of
my own power to be honest i hate compulsion in all forms and cannot
bear even to be compelled to be the wretch my choice has made me so
now belford as thou hast said i am a machine at last and no free
agent 

upon my soul jack it is a very foolish thing for a man of spirit to
have brought himself to such a height of iniquity that he must proceed 
and cannot help himself and yet to be next to certain that this very
victory will undo him 

why was such a woman as this thrown into my way whose very fall will
be her glory and perhaps not only my shame but my destruction 

what a happiness must that man know who moves regularly to some
laudable end and has nothing to reproach himself with in his progress
to do it when by honest means he attains his end how great and
unmixed must be his enjoyments what a happy man in this particular
case had i been had it been given me to be only what i wished to appear
to be 

thus far had my conscience written with my pen and see what a recreant
she had made of me i seized her by the throat there there said i 
thou vile impertinent take that and that how often have i gave thee
warning and now i hope thou intruding varletess have i done thy
business 

puling and low-voiced rearing up thy detested head in vain implorest
thou my mercy who in thy day hast showed me so little take that for
a rising blow and now will thy pain and my pain for thee soon be
over lie there welter on had i not given thee thy death's wound 
thou wouldest have robbed me of all my joys thou couldest not have
mended me tis plain thou couldest only have thrown me into despair 
didst thou not see that i had gone too far to recede welter on once
more i bid thee gasp on that thy last gasp surely how hard diest
thou 

adieu unhappy man adieu 

tis kind in thee however to bid me adieu 

adieu adieu adieu to thee o thou inflexible and till now 
unconquerable bosom intruder adieu to thee for ever 



letter ii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday morn june 11 four o'clock 


a few words to the verbal information thou sentest me last night
concerning thy poor old man and then i rise from my seat shake myself 
refresh new-dress and so to my charmer whom notwithstanding her
reserves i hope to prevail upon to walk out with me on the heath this
warm and fine morning 

the birds must have awakened her before now they are in full song she
always gloried in accustoming herself to behold the sun rise one of
god's natural wonders as once she called it 

her window salutes the east the valleys must be gilded by his rays by
the time i am with her for already have they made the up-lands smile and
the face of nature cheerful 

how unsuitable will thou find this gay preface to a subject so gloomy as
that i am now turning to 

i am glad to hear thy tedious expectations are at last answered 

thy servant tells me that thou are plaguily grieved at the old fellow's
departure 

i can't say but thou mayest look as if thou wert harassed as thou hast
been for a number of days and nights with a close attendance upon a dying
man beholding his drawing-on hour pretending for decency's sake to
whine over his excruciating pangs to be in the way to answer a thousand
impertinent inquiries after the health of a man thou wishedest to die to
pray by him for so once thou wrotest to me to read by him to be
forced to join in consultation with a crew of solemn and parading
doctors and their officious zanies the apothecaries joined with the
butcherly tribe of scarficators all combined to carry on the physical
farce and to cut out thongs both from his flesh and his estate to have
the superadded apprehension of dividing thy interest in what he shall
leave with a crew of eager-hoping never-to-be-satisfied relations 
legatees and the devil knows who of private gratifiers of passions
laudable and illaudable in these circumstances i wonder not that thou
lookest before servants as little grieved as thou after heirship as
if thou indeed wert grieved and as if the most wry-fac'd woe had
befallen thee 

then as i have often thought the reflection that must naturally arise
from such mortifying objects as the death of one with whom we have been
familiar must afford when we are obliged to attend it in its slow
approaches and in its face-twisting pangs that it will one day be our
own case goes a great way to credit the appearance of grief 

and that it is this seriously reflected upon may temporally give a fine
air of sincerity to the wailings of lively widows heart-exulting heirs 
and residuary legatees of all denominations since by keeping down the
inward joy those interesting reflections must sadden the aspect and add
an appearance of real concern to the assumed sables 

well but now thou art come to the reward of all thy watchings 
anxieties and close attendances tell me what it is tell me if it
compensate thy trouble and answer thy hope 

as to myself thou seest by the gravity of my style how the subject has
helped to mortify me but the necessity i am under of committing either
speedy matrimony or a rape has saddened over my gayer prospects and 
more than the case itself contributed to make me sympathize with the
present joyful-sorrow 

adieu jack i must be soon out of my pain and my clarissa shall be soon
out of her's for so does the arduousness of the case require 



letter iii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday morning 


i have had the honour of my charmer's company for two complete hours we
met before six in mrs moore's garden a walk on the heath refused me 

the sedateness of her aspect and her kind compliance in this meeting gave
me hopes and all that either the captain and i had urged yesterday to
obtain a full and free pardon that re-urged i and i told her besides 
that captain tomlinson was gone down with hopes to prevail upon her uncle
harlowe to come up in person in order to present to me the greatest
blessing that man ever received 

but the utmost i could obtain was that she would take no resolution in
my favour till she received miss howe's next letter 

i will not repeat the arguments i used but i will give thee the
substance of what she said in answer to them 

she had considered of every thing she told me my whole conduct was
before her the house i carried her to must be a vile house the people
early showed what they were capable of in the earnest attempt made to
fasten miss partington upon her as she doubted not with my approbation 
 surely thought i she has not received a duplicate of miss howe's
letter of detection   they heard her cries my insult was undoubtedly
premeditated by my whole recollected behaviour to her previous to it 
it must be so i had the vilest of views no question and my treatment
of her put it out of all doubt 

soul over all belford she seems sensible of liberties that my passion
made me insensible of having taken or she could not so deeply resent 

she besought me to give over all thoughts of her sometimes she said 
she thought herself cruelly treated by her nearest and dearest relations 
at such times a spirit of repining and even of resentment took place 
and the reconciliation at other times so desirable was not then so much
the favourite wish of her heart as was the scheme she had formerly
planned of taking her good norton for her directress and guide and
living upon her own estate in the manner her grandfather had intended she
should live 

this scheme she doubted not that her cousin morden who was one of her
trustees for that estate would enable her and that as she hoped 
without litigation to pursue and if he can and does what sir let
me ask you said she have i seen in your conduct that should make me
prefer to it an union of interest where there is such a disunion in
minds 

so thou seest jack there is reason as well as resentment in the
preference she makes against me thou seest that she presumes to think
that she can be happy without me and that she must be unhappy with me 

i had besought her in the conclusion of my re-urged arguments to write
to miss howe before miss howe's answer could come in order to lay before
her the present state of things and if she would pay a deference to her
judgment to let her have an opportunity to give it on the full knowledge
of the case 

so i would mr lovelace was the answer if i were in doubt myself 
which i would prefer marriage or the scheme i have mentioned you
cannot think sir but the latter must be my choice i wish to part with
you with temper don't put me upon repeating 

part with me madam interrupted i i cannot bear those words but let
me beseech you however to write to miss howe i hope if miss howe is
not my enemy 

she is not the enemy of your person sir as you would be convinced if
you saw her last letter to me but were she not an enemy to your
actions she would not be my friend nor the friend of virtue why will
you provoke from me mr lovelace the harshness of expression which 
however which however deserved by you i am unwilling just now to use 
having suffered enough in the two past days from my own vehemence 


 the lady innocently means mr lovelace's forged one see vol v 
letter xxx 


i bit my lip for vexation and was silent 

miss howe proceeded she knows the full state of matters already sir 
the answer i expect from her respects myself not you her heart is too
warm in the cause of friendship to leave me in suspense one moment
longer than is necessary as to what i want to know nor does her answer
absolutely depend upon herself she must see a person first and that
person perhaps see others 

the cursed smuggler-woman jack miss howe's townsend i doubt not 
plot contrivance intrigue stratagem underground-moles these women 
but let the earth cover me let me be a mole too thought i if they
carry their point and if this lady escape me now 

she frankly owned that she had once thought of embarking out of all our
ways for some one of our american colonies but now that she had been
compelled to see me which had been her greatest dread and which she
might be happiest in the resumption of her former favourite scheme if
miss howe could find her a reputable and private asylum till her cousin
morden could come but if he came not soon and if she had a difficulty
to get to a place of refuge whether from her brother or from any body
else  meaning me i suppose   she might yet perhaps go abroad for to
say the truth she could not think of returning to her father's house 
since her brother's rage her sister's upbraidings her father's anger 
her mother's still-more-affecting sorrowings and her own consciousness
under them all would be unsupportable to her 

o jack i am sick to death i pine i die for miss howe's next letter 
i would bind gag strip rob and do any thing but murder to intercept
it 

but determined as she seems to be it was evident to me nevertheless 
that she had still some tenderness for me 

she often wept as she talked and much oftener sighed she looked at me
twice with an eye of undoubted gentleness and three times with an eye
tending to compassion and softness but its benign rays were as often
snatched back as i may say and her face averted as if her sweet eyes
were not to be trusted and could not stand against my eager eyes 
seeking as they did for a lost heart in her's and endeavouring to
penetrate to her very soul 

more than once i took her hand she struggled not much against the
freedom i pressed it once with my lips she was not very angry a
frown indeed but a frown that had more distress in it than indignation 

how came the dear soul clothed as it is with such a silken vesture by
all its steadiness was it necessary that the active gloom of such a
tyrant of a father should commix with such a passive sweetness of a
will-less mother to produce a constancy an equanimity a steadiness in
the daughter which never woman before could boast of if so she is
more obliged to that despotic father than i could have imagined a
creature to be who gave distinction to every one related to her beyond
what the crown itself can confer 


 see vol i letters ix xiv and xix for what she herself says on that
steadiness which mr lovelace though a deserved sufferer by it cannot
help admiring 


i hoped i said that she would admit of the intended visit which i had
so often mentioned of the two ladies 

she was here she had seen me she could not help herself at present 
she even had the highest regard for the ladies of my family because of
their worthy characters there she turned away her sweet face and
vanquished an half-risen sigh 

i kneeled to her then it was upon a verdant cushion for we were upon
the grass walk i caught her hand i besought her with an earnestness
that called up as i could feel my heart to my eyes to make me by her
forgiveness and example more worthy of them and of her own kind and
generous wishes by my soul madam said i you stab me with your
goodness your undeserved goodness and i cannot bear it 

why why thought i as i did several times in this conversation will
she not generously forgive me why will she make it necessary for me to
bring lady betty and my cousin to my assistance can the fortress expect
the same advantageous capitulation which yields not to the summons of a
resistless conqueror as if it gave not the trouble of bringing up and
raising its heavy artillery against it 

what sensibilities said the divine creature withdrawing her hand must
thou have suppressed what a dreadful what a judicial hardness of heart
must thine be who canst be capable of such emotions as sometimes thou
hast shown and of such sentiments as sometimes have flowed from thy
lips yet canst have so far overcome them all as to be able to act as
thou hast acted and that from settled purpose and premeditation and
this as it is said throughout the whole of thy life from infancy to
this time 

i told her that i had hoped from the generous concern she had expressed
for me when i was so suddenly and dangerously taken ill  the
ipecacuanha experiment jack  

she interrupted me well have you rewarded me for the concern you speak
of however i will frankly own now that i am determined to think no
more of you that you might unsatisfied as i nevertheless was with
you have made an interest 

she paused i besought her to proceed 

do you suppose sir and turned away her sweet face as we walked do you
suppose that i had not thought of laying down a plan to govern myself by 
when i found myself so unhappily over-reached and cheated as i may say 
out of myself when i found that i could not be and do what i wished
to be and to do do you imagine that i had not cast about what was the
next proper course to take and do you believe that this next course has
not caused me some pain to be obliged to 

there again she stopt 

but let us break off discourse resumed she the subject grows too she
sighed let us break off discourse i will go in i will prepare for
church  the devil thought i   well as i can appear in those
every-day-worn clothes looking upon herself i will go to church 

she then turned from me to go into the house 

bless me my beloved creature bless me with the continuance of this
affecting conversation remorse has seized my heart i have been
excessively wrong give me farther cause to curse my heedless folly by
the continuance of this calm but soul-penetrating conversation 

no no mr lovelace i have said too much impatience begins to break
in upon me if you can excuse me to the ladies it will be better for
my mind's sake and for your credit's sake that i do not see them call
me to them over-nice petulant prudish what you please call me to them 
nobody but miss howe to whom next to the almighty and my own mother i
wish to stand acquitted of wilful error shall know the whole of what has
passed be happy as you may deserve to be happy and happy you will
be in your own reflection at least were you to be ever so unhappy in
other respects for myself if i ever shall be enabled on due
reflection to look back upon my own conduct without the great reproach
of having wilfully and against the light of my own judgment erred i
shall be more happy than if i had all that the world accounts desirable 

the noble creature proceeded for i could not speak 

this self-acquittal when spirits are lent me to dispel the darkness
which at present too often over-clouds my mind will i hope make me
superior to all the calamities that can befal me 

her whole person was informed by her sentiments she seemed to be taller
than before how the god within her exalted her not only above me but
above herself 

divine creature as i thought her i called her i acknowledged the
superiority of her mind and was proceeding but she interrupted me all
human excellence said she is comparative only my mind i believe is
indeed superior to your's debased as your's is by evil habits but i had
not known it to be so if you had not taken pains to convince me of the
inferiority of your's 

how great how sublimely great this creature by my soul i cannot
forgive her for her virtues there is no bearing the consciousness of
the infinite inferiority she charged me with but why will she break
from me when good resolutions are taking place the red-hot iron she
refuses to strike o why will she suffer the yielding wax to harden 

we had gone but a few paces towards the house when we were met by the
impertinent women with notice that breakfast was ready i could only 
with uplifted hands beseech her to give me hope of a renewed
conversation after breakfast 

no she would go to church 

and into the house she went and up stairs directly nor would she
oblige me with her company at the tea-table 

i offered by mrs moore to quit both the table and the parlour rather
than she should exclude herself or deprive the two widows of the favour
of her company 

that was not all the matter she told mrs moore she had been
struggling to keep down her temper it had cost her some pains to do it 
she was desirous to compose herself in hopes to receive benefit by the
divine worship she was going to join in 

mrs moore hoped for her presence at dinner 

she had rather be excused yet if she could obtain the frame of mind
she hoped for she might not be averse to show that she had got above
those sensibilities which gave consideration to a man who deserved not
to be to her what he had been 

this said no doubt to let mrs moore know that the garden-conversation
had not been a reconciling one 

mrs moore seemed to wonder that we were not upon a better foot of
understanding after so long a conference and the more as she believed
that the lady had given in to the proposal for the repetition of the
ceremony which i had told them was insisted upon by her uncle harlowe 
but i accounted for this by telling both widows that she was resolved to
keep on the reserve till she heard from captain tomlinson whether her
uncle would be present in person at the solemnity or would name that
worthy gentleman for his proxy 

again i enjoined strict secresy as to this particular which was
promised by the widows as well as for themselves as for miss rawlins 
of whose taciturnity they gave me such an account as showed me that she
was secret-keeper-general to all the women of fashion at hampstead 

the lord jack what a world of mischief at this rate must miss
rawlins know what a pandora's box must her bosom be yet had i
nothing that was more worthy of my attention to regard i would engage to
open it and make my uses of the discovery 

and now belford thou perceivest that all my reliance is upon the
mediation of lady betty and miss montague and upon the hope of
intercepting miss howe's next letter 



letter iv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


this fair inexorable is actually gone to church with mrs moore and mrs 
bevis but will closely attends her motions and i am in the way to
receive any occasional intelligence from him 

she did not choose  a mighty word with the sex as if they were always
to have their own wills   that i should wait upon her i did not much
press it that she might not apprehend that i thought i had reason to
doubt her voluntary return 

i once had it in my head to have found the widow bevis other employment 
and i believe she would have been as well pleased with my company as to
go to church for she seemed irresolute when i told her that two out of
a family were enough to go to church for one day but having her things
on as the women call every thing and her aunt moore expecting her
company she thought it best to go lest it should look oddly you know 
whispered she to one who was above regarding how it looked 

so here am i in my dining-room and have nothing to do but to write till
they return 

and what will be my subject thinkest thou why the old beaten one to be
sure self-debate through temporary remorse for the blow being not
struck her guardian angel is redoubling his efforts to save her 

if it be not that  and yet what power should her guardian angel have
over me   i don't know what it is that gives a check to my revenge 
whenever i meditate treason against so sovereign a virtue conscience is
dead and gone as i told thee so it cannot be that a young conscience
growing up like the phoenix from the ashes of the old one it cannot
be surely but if it were it would be hard if i could not overlay a
young conscience 

well then it must be love i fancy love itself inspiring love of an
object so adorable some little attention possibly paid likewise to thy
whining arguments in her favour 

let love then be allowed to be the moving principle and the rather as
love naturally makes the lover loth to disoblige the object of its flame 
and knowing that to an offence of the meditated kind will be a mortal
offence to her cannot bear that i should think of giving it 

let love and me talk together a little on this subject be it a young
conscience or love or thyself jack thou seest that i am for giving
every whiffler audience but this must be the last debate on this
subject for is not her fate in a manner at its crisis and must not my
next step be an irretrievable one tend it which way it will 


 


and now the debate is over 

a thousand charming things for love is gentler than conscience has
this little urchin suggested in her favour he pretended to know both
our hearts and he would have it that though my love was a prodigious
strong and potent love and though it has the merit of many months 
faithful service to plead and has had infinite difficulties to struggle
with yet that it is not the right sort of love 

right sort of love a puppy but with due regard to your deityship 
said i what merits has she with you that you should be of her party 
is her's i pray you a right sort of love is it love at all she
don't pretend that it is she owns not your sovereignty what a d l
i moves you to plead thus earnestly for a rebel who despises your
power 

and then he came with his if's and and's and it would have been and
still as he believed would be love and a love of the exalted kind if
i would encourage it by the right sort of love he talked of and in
justification of his opinion pleaded her own confessions as well those
of yesterday as of this morning and even went so far back as to my
ipecacuanha illness 

i never talked so familiarly with his godship before thou mayest think 
therefore that his dialect sounded oddly in my ears and then he told
me how often i had thrown cold water upon the most charming flame that
ever warmed a lady's bosom while but young and rising 

i required a definition of this right sort of love he tried at it but
made a sorry hand of it nor could i for the soul of me be convinced 
that what he meant to extol was love 

upon the whole we had a noble controversy upon this subject in which
he insisted upon the unprecedented merit of the lady nevertheless i got
the better of him for he was struck absolutely dumb when waving her
present perverseness which yet was a sufficient answer to all his pleas 
i asserted and offered to prove it by a thousand instances impromptu 
that love was not governed by merit nor could be under the dominion of
prudence or any other reasoning power and if the lady were capable of
love it was of such a sort as he had nothing to do with and which never
before reigned in a female heart 

i asked him what he thought of her flight from me at a time when i was
more than half overcome by the right sort of love he talked of and then
i showed him the letter she wrote and left behind her for me with an
intention no doubt absolutely to break my heart or to provoke me to
hang drown or shoot myself to say nothing of a multitude of
declarations from her defying his power and imputing all that looked
like love in her behaviour to me to the persecution and rejection of her
friends which made her think of me but as a last resort 

love then gave her up the letter he said deserved neither pardon nor
excuse he did not think he had been pleading for such a declared rebel 
and as to the rest he should be a betrayer of the rights of his own
sovereignty if what i had alleged were true and he were still to plead
for her 

i swore to the truth of all and truly i swore which perhaps i do not
always do 

and now what thinkest thou must become of the lady whom love itself
gives up and conscience cannot plead for 



letter v

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday afternoon 


o belford what a hair's-breadth escape have i had such a one that i
tremble between terror and joy at the thought of what might have
happened and did not 

what a perverse girl is this to contend with her fate yet has reason
to think that her very stars fight against her i am the luckiest of
me but my breath almost fails me when i reflect upon what a slender
thread my destiny hung 

but not to keep thee in suspense i have within this half-hour obtained
possession of the expected letter from miss howe and by such an
accident but here with the former i dispatch this thy messenger
waiting 



letter vi

mr lovelace
 in continuation  


thus it was my charmer accompanied mrs moore again to church this
afternoon i had been in very earnest in the first place to obtain her
company at dinner but in vain according to what she had said to mrs 
moore i was too considerable to her to be allowed that favour in the
next place i besought her to favour me after dinner with another
garden-walk but she would again go to church and what reason have i
to rejoice that she did 


 see letter iii of this volume 


my worthy friend mrs bevis thought one sermon a day well observed 
enough so staid at home to bear me company 

the lady and mrs moore had not been gone a quarter of an hour when a
young country-fellow on horseback came to the door and inquired for mrs 
harriot lucas the widow and i undetermined how we were to entertain
each other were in the parlour next the door and hearing the fellow's
inquiry o my dear mrs bevis said i i am undone undone for ever if
you don't help me out since here in all probability is a messenger
from that implacable miss howe with a letter which if delivered to mrs 
lovelace may undo all we have been doing 

what said she would you have me do 

call the maid in this moment that i may give her her lesson and if it
be as i imagined i'll tell you what you shall do 

wid margaret margaret come in this minute 

lovel what answer mrs margaret did you give the man upon his
asking for mrs harriot lucas 

peggy i only asked what was his business and who he came from for 
sir your honour's servant had told me how things stood and i came at
your call madam before he answered me 

lovel well child if ever you wish to be happy in wedlock yourself 
and would have people disappointed who want to make mischief between you
and your husband get out of him his message or letter if he has one 
and bring it to me and say nothing to mrs lovelace when she comes in 
and here is a guinea for you 

peggy i will do all i can to serve your honour's worship for nothing 
 nevertheless with a ready hand taking the guinea   for mr william
tells me what a good gentleman you be 

away went peggy to the fellow at the door 

peggy what is your business friend with mrs harry lucas 

fellow i must speak to her her own self 

lovel my dearest widow do you personate mrs lovelace for heaven's
sake do you personate mrs lovelace 

wid i personate mrs lovelace sir how can i do that she is fair 
i am brown she is slender i am plump 

lovel no matter no matter the fellow may be a new-come servant he
is not in livery i see he may not know her person you can but be
bloated and in a dropsy 

wid dropsical people look not so fresh and ruddy as i do 

lovel true but the clown may not know that tis but for a present
deception peggy peggy call'd i in a female tone softly at the door 
madam answer'd peggy and came up to me to the parlour-door 

lovel tell him the lady is ill and has lain down upon the couch and
get his business from him whatever you do 

away went peggy 

lovel now my dear widow lie along the settee and put your
handkerchief over your face that if he will speak to you himself he
may not see your eyes and your hair so that's right i'll step into
the closet by you 

i did so 

peggy  returning   he won't deliver his business to me he will
speak to mrs harriot lucas her own self 

lovel  holding the door in my hand   tell him that this is mrs 
harriot lucas and let him come in whisper him if he doubts that she
is bloated dropsical and not the woman she was 

away went margery 

lovel and now my dear widow let me see what a charming mrs lovelace
you'll make ask if he comes from miss howe ask if he lives with her 
ask how she does call her at every word your dear miss howe offer
him money take this half-guinea for him complain of your head to have
a pretence to hold it down and cover your forehead and eyes with your
hand where your handkerchief hides not your face that's right and
dismiss the rascal  here he comes  as soon as you can 

in came the fellow bowing and scraping his hat poked out before him
with both his hands 

fellow i am sorry madam an't please you to find you ben't well 

widow what is your business with me friend 

fellow you are mrs harriot lucas i suppose madam 

widow yes do you come from miss howe 

fellow i do madam 

widow dost thou know my right name friend 

fellow i can give a shrewd guess but that is none of my business 

widow what is thy business i hope miss howe is well 

fellow yes madam pure well i thank god i wish you were so too 

widow i am too full of grief to be well 

fellow so belike i have hard to say 

widow my head aches so dreadfully i cannot hold it up i must beg
of you to let me know your business 

fellow nay and that be all my business is soon known it is but to
give this letter into your own partiklar hands here it is 

widow  taking it   from my dear friend miss howe ah my head 

fellow yes madam but i am sorry you are so bad 

widow do you live with miss howe 

fellow no madam i am one of her tenants' sons her lady-mother must
not know as how i came of this errand but the letter i suppose will
tell you all 

widow how shall i satisfy you for this kind trouble 

fellow no how at all what i do is for love of miss howe she will
satisfy me more than enough but may-hap you can send no answer you
are so ill 

widow was you ordered to wait for an answer 

fellow no i cannot say as that i was but i was bidden to observe
how you looked and how you was and if you did write a line or two to
take care of it and give it only to our young landlady in secret 

widow you see i look strangely not so well as i used to do 

fellow nay i don't know that i ever saw you but once before and that
was at a stile where i met you and my young landlady but knew better
than to stare a gentlewoman in the face especially at a stile 

widow will you eat or drink friend 

fellow a cup of small ale i don't care if i do 

widow margaret take the young man down and treat him with what the
house affords 

fellow your servant madam but i staid to eat as i come along just
upon the heath yonder or else to say the truth i had been here sooner 
 thank my stars thought i thou didst   a piece of powdered beef was
upon the table at the sign of the castle where i stopt to inquire for
this house and so thoff i only intended to wet my whistle i could not
help eating so shall only taste of your ale for the beef was woundily
corned 

prating dog pox on thee thought i 

he withdrew bowing and scraping 

margaret whispered i in a female voice  whispering out of the closet 
and holding the parlour-door in my hand  get him out of the house as fast
as you can lest they come from church and catch him here 

peggy never fear sir 

the fellow went down and it seems drank a large draught of ale and
margaret finding him very talkative told him she begged his pardon but
she had a sweetheart just come from sea whom she was forced to hide in
the pantry so was sure he would excuse her from staying with him 

ay ay to be sure the clown said for if he could not make sport he
would spoil none but he whispered her that one squire lovelace was a
damnation rogue if the truth might be told 

for what said margaret and could have given him she told the widow
 who related to me all this a good dowse of the chaps 

for kissing all the women he came near 

at the same time the dog wrapped himself round margery and gave her a
smack that she told mrs bevis afterwards she might have heard into
the parlour 

such jack is human nature thus does it operate in all degrees and so
does the clown as well as his practises yet this sly dog knew not but
the wench had a sweetheart locked up in the pantry if the truth were
known some of the ruddy-faced dairy wenches might perhaps call him a
damnation rogue as justly as their betters of the same sex might squire
lovelace 

the fellow told the maid that by what he discovered of the young lady's
face it looked very rosy to what he took it to be and he thought her a
good deal fatter as she lay and not so tall 

all women are born to intrigue jack and practise it more or less as
fathers guardians governesses from dear experience can tell and in
love affairs are naturally expert and quicker in their wits by half than
men this ready though raw wench gave an instance of this and
improved on the dropsical hint i had given her the lady's seeming
plumpness was owing to a dropsical disorder and to the round posture she
lay in very likely truly her appearing to him to be shorter he might
have observed was owing to her drawing her feet up from pain and
because the couch was too short she supposed adso he did not think of
that her rosy colour was owing to her grief and head-ache ay that
might very well be but he was highly pleased that he had given the
letter into mrs harriot's own hand as he should tell miss howe 

he desired once more to see the lady at his going away and would not be
denied the widow therefore sat up with her handkerchief over her face 
leaning her head against the wainscot 

he asked if she had any partiklar message 

no she was so ill she could not write which was a great grief to her 

should he call the next day for he was going to london now he was so
near and should stay at a cousin's that night who lived in a street
called fetter-lane 

no she would write as soon as able and send by the post 

well then if she had nothing to send by him mayhap he might stay in
town a day or two for he had never seen the lions in the tower nor
bedlam nor the tombs and he would make a holiday or two as he had
leave to do if she had no business or message that required his posting
down next day 

she had not 

she offered him the half-guinea i had given her for him but he refused
it with great professions of disinterestedness and love as he called
it to miss howe to serve whom he would ride to the world's-end or
even to jericho 

and so the shocking rascal went away and glad at my heart was i when he
was gone for i feared nothing so much as that he would have staid till
they came from church 

thus jack got i my heart's ease the letter of miss howe ad through
such a train of accidents as makes me say that the lady's stars fight
against her but yet i must attribute a good deal to my own precaution 
in having taken right measures for had i not secured the widow by my
stories and the maid by my servant all would have signified nothing 
and so heartily were they secured the one by a single guinea the other
by half a dozen warm kisses and the aversion they both had to such
wicked creatures as delighted in making mischief between man and wife 
that they promised that neither mrs moore miss rawlins mrs lovelace 
nor any body living should know any thing of the matter 

the widow rejoiced that i had got the mischief-maker's letter i excused
myself to her and instantly withdrew with it and after i had read it 
fell to my short-hand to acquaint thee with my good luck and they not
returning so soon as church was done stepping as it proved into miss
rawlins's and tarrying there awhile to bring that busy girl with them
to drink tea i wrote thus far to thee that thou mightest when thou
camest to this place rejoice with me upon the occasion 

they are all three just come in 

i hasten to them 



letter vii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


i have begun another letter to thee in continuation of my narrative but
i believe i shall send thee this before i shall finish that by the
enclosed thou wilt see that neither of the correspondents deserve mercy
from me and i am resolved to make the ending with one the beginning with
the other 

if thou sayest that the provocations i have given to one of them will
justify her freedoms i answer so they will to any other person but
myself but he that is capable of giving those provocations and has the
power to punish those who abuse him for giving them will show his
resentment and the more remorselessly perhaps as he has deserved the
freedoms 

if thou sayest it is however wrong to do so i reply that it is
nevertheless human nature and wouldst thou not have me to be a man 
jack 

here read the letter if thou wilt but thou art not my friend if thou
offerest to plead for either of the saucy creatures after thou hast read
it 


to mrs harriot lucas 

at mrs moore's at hampstead 
june 10 

after the discoveries i had made of the villanous machinations of the
most abandoned of men particularized in my long letter of wednesday 
last you will believe my dearest friend that my surprise upon perusing
your's of thursday evening from hampstead was not so great as my
indignation had the villain attempted to fire a city instead of a
house i should not have wondered at it all that i am amazed at is 
that he whose boast as i am told it is that no woman shall keep him
out of her bed-chamber when he has made a resolution to be in it did
not discover his foot before and it is as strange to me that having
got you at such a shocking advantage and in such a horrid house you
could at the time escape dishonour and afterwards get from such a set
of infernals 


 see vol v letter xx 
 ibid see letter xxi 


i gave you in my long letter of wednesday and thursday last reasons why
you ought to mistrust that specious tomlinson that man my dear must
be a solemn villain may lightning from heaven blast the wretch who has
set him and the rest of his remorseless gang at work to endeavour to
destroy the most consummate virtue heaven be praised you have escaped
from all their snares and now are out of danger so i will not trouble
you at present with the particulars i have further collected relating to
this abominable imposture 

for the same reason i forbear to communicate to you some new stories of
the abhorred wretch himself which have come to my ears one in
particular of so shocking a nature indeed my dear the man's a devil 

the whole story of mrs fretchville and her house i have no doubt to
pronounce likewise an absolute fiction fellow how my soul spurns
the villain 

your thought of going abroad and your reasons for so doing most
sensibly affect me but be comforted my dear i hope you will not be
under a necessity of quitting your native country were i sure that that
must be the cruel case i would abandon all my better prospects and soon
be with you and i would accompany you whithersoever you went and share
fortunes with you for it is impossible that i should be happy if i knew
that you were exposed not only to the perils of the sea but to the
attempts of other vile men your personal graces attracting every eye 
and exposing you to those hourly dangers which others less
distinguished by the gifts of nature might avoid all that i know that
beauty so greatly coveted and so greatly admired is good for 

o my dear were i ever to marry and to be the mother of a clarissa 
 clarissa must be the name if promisingly lovely   how often would my
heart ache for the dear creature as she grew up when i reflected that a
prudence and discretion unexampled in woman had not in you been a
sufficient protection to that beauty which had drawn after it as many
admirers as beholders how little should i regret the attacks of that
cruel distemper as it is called which frequently makes the greatest
ravages in the finest faces 


sat afternoon 

i have just parted with mrs townsend i thought you had once seen her
with me but she says she never had the honour to be personally known to
you she has a manlike spirit she knows the world and her two
brothers being in town she is sure she can engage them in so good a
cause and if there should be occasion both their ships' crews in your
service 


 for the account of mrs townsend etc see vol iv letter xlii 


give your consent my dear and the horrid villain shall be repaid with
broken bones at least for all his vileness 

the misfortune is mrs townsend cannot be with you till thursday next 
or wednesday at soonest are you sure you can be safe where you are till
then i think you are too near london and perhaps you had better be in
it if you remove let me the very moment know whither 

how my heart is torn to think of the necessity so dear a creature is
driven to of hiding herself devilish fellow he must have been
sportive and wanton in his inventions yet that cruel that savage
sportiveness has saved you from the sudden violence to which he has had
recourse in the violation of others of names and families not
contemptible for such the villain always gloried to spread his snares 

the vileness of this specious monster has done more than any other
consideration could do to bring mr hickman into credit with me mr 
hickman alone knows from me of your flight and the reason of it had
i not given him the reason he might have thought still worse of the vile
attempt i communicated it to him by showing him your letter from
hampstead when he had read it  and he trembled and reddened as he
read   he threw himself at my feet and besought me to permit him to
attend you and to give you the protection of his house the
good-natured man had tears in his eyes and was repeatedly earnest on this
subject proposing to take his chariot-and-four or a set and in person 
in the face of all the world give himself the glory of protecting such
an oppressed innocent 

i could not but be pleased with him and i let him know that i was i
hardly expected so much spirit from him but a man's passiveness to a
beloved object of our sex may not perhaps argue want of courage on
proper occasions 

i thought i ought in return to have some consideration for his safety 
as such an open step would draw upon him the vengeance of the most
villanous enterpriser in the world who has always a gang of fellows 
such as himself at his call ready to support one another in the vilest
outrages but yet as mr hickman might have strengthened his hands by
legal recourses i should not have stood upon it had i not known your
delicacy  since such a step must have made a great noise and given
occasion for scandal as if some advantage had been gained over you   and
were there not the greatest probability that all might be more silently 
and more effectually managed by mrs townsend's means 

mrs townsend will in person attend you she hopes on wednesday her
brothers and some of their people will scatteringly and as if they
knew nothing of you  so we have contrived   see you safe not only to
london but to her house at deptford 

she has a kinswoman who will take your commands there if she herself
be obliged to leave you and there you may stay till the wretch's fury 
on losing you and his search are over 

he will very soon tis likely enter upon some new villany which may
engross him and it may be given out that you are gone to lay claim to
the protection of your cousin morden at florence 

possibly if he can be made to believe it he will go over in hopes to
find you there 

after a while i can procure you a lodging in one of our neighbouring
villages where i may have the happiness to be your daily visiter and
if this hickman be not silly and apish and if my mother do not do
unaccountable things i may the sooner think of marrying that i may 
without controul receive and entertain the darling of my heart 

many very many happy days do i hope we shall yet see together and as
this is my hope i expect that it will be your consolation 

as to your estate since you are resolved not to litigate for it we will
be patient either till colonel morden arrives or till shame compels
some people to be just 

upon the whole i cannot but think your prospects now much happier than
they could have been had you been actually married to such a man as
this i must therefore congratulate you upon your escape not only from
a horrid libertine but from so vile a husband as he must have made to
any woman but more especially to a person of your virtue and delicacy 

you hate him heartily hate him i hope my dear i am sure you do it
would be strange if so much purity of life and manners were not to abhor
what is so repugnant to itself 

in your letter before me you mention one written to me for a feint i
have not received any such depend upon it therefore that he must have
it and if he has it is a wonder that he did not likewise get my long
one of the 7th heaven be praised that he did not and that it came safe
to your hands 


 see vol v letters xxi and xxii 


i send this by a young fellow whose father is one of our tenants with
command to deliver it to no other hands but your's he is to return
directly if you give him any letter if not he will proceed to london
upon his own pleasures he is a simple fellow but very honest so you
may say anything to him if you write not by him i desire a line or
two as soon as possible 

my mother knows nothing of his going to you nor yet of your abandoning
the fellow forgive me but he is not entitled to good manners 

i shall long to hear how you and mrs townsend order matters i wish
she could have been with you sooner but i have lost no time in engaging
her as you will suppose i refer to her what i have further to say and
advise so shall conclude with my prayers that heaven will direct and
protect my dearest creature and make your future days happy 

anna howe 


and now jack i will suppose that thou hast read this cursed letter 
allow me to make a few observations upon some of its contents 


it is strange to miss howe that having got her friend at such a shocking
advantage etc and it is strange to me too if ever i have such
another opportunity given to me the cause of both our wonder i believe 
will cease 

so thou seest tomlinson is further detected no such person as mrs 
fretchville may lightning from heaven o lord o lord o lord what a
horrid vixen is this my gang my remorseless gang too is brought in 
and thou wilt plead for these girls again wilt thou heaven be praised 
she says that her friend is out of danger miss howe should be sure of
that and that she herself is safe but for this termagant as i often
said i must surely have made a better hand of it 

new stories of me jack what can they be i have not found that my
generosity to my rose-bud ever did me due credit with this pair of
friends very hard belford that credits cannot be set against debits 
and a balance struck in a rake's favour as well as in that of every
common man but he from whom no good is expected is not allowed the
merit of the good he does 

i ought to have been a little more attentive to character than i have
been for notwithstanding that the measures of right and wrong are said
to be so manifest let me tell thee that character biases and runs away
with all mankind let a man or woman once establish themselves in the
world's opinion and all that either of them do will be sanctified nay 
in the very courts of justice does not character acquit or condemn as
often as facts and sometimes even in spite of facts yet  impolitic
that i have been and am   to be so careless of mine and now i doubt 
it is irretrievable but to leave moralizing 

thou jack knowest almost all my enterprises worth remembering can
this particular story which this girl hints at be that of lucy villars 
 or can she have heard of my intrigue with the pretty gipsey who met me
in norwood and of the trap i caught her cruel husband in  a fellow as
gloomy and tyrannical as old harlowe   when he pursued a wife who would
not have deserved ill of him if he had deserved well of her but he was
not quite drowned the man is alive at this day and miss howe mentions
the story as a very shocking one besides both these are a twelve-month
old or more 

but evil fame and scandal are always new when the offender has forgot a
vile fact it is often told to one and to another who having never
heard of it before trumpet it about as a novelty to others but well
said the honest corregidor at madrid  a saying with which i encroached
lord m s collection   good actions are remembered but for a day bad
ones for many years after the life of the guilty such is the relish
that the world has for scandal in other words such is the desire which
every one has to exculpate himself by blackening his neighbour you and
i belford have been very kind to the world in furnishing it with
opportunities to gratify its devil 

 miss howe will abandon her own better prospects and share fortunes with
her were she to go abroad   charming romancer i must set about this
girl jack i have always had hopes of a woman whose passions carry her
to such altitudes had i attacked miss howe first her passions 
 inflamed and guided as i could have managed them would have brought
her into my lure in a fortnight 

but thinkest thou  and yet i think thou dost   that there is any thing
in these high flights among the sex verily jack these vehement
friendships are nothing but chaff and stubble liable to be blown away by
the very wind that raises them apes mere apes of us they think the
word friendship has a pretty sound with it and it is much talked of a
fashionable word and so truly a single woman who thinks she has a
soul and knows that she wants something would be thought to have found
a fellow-soul for it in her own sex but i repeat that the word is a
mere word the thing a mere name with them a cork-bottomed shuttle-cock 
which they are fond of striking to and fro to make one another glow in
the frosty weather of a single-state but which when a man comes in
between the pretended inseparables is given up like their music and
other maidenly amusements which nevertheless may be necessary to keep
the pretty rogues out of active mischief they then in short having
caught the fish lay aside the net 


 he alludes here to the story of a pope who once a poor fisherman 
through every preferment he rose to even to that of the cardinalate 
hung up in view of all his guests his net as a token of humility but 
when he arrived at the pontificate he took it down saying that there
was no need of the net when he had caught the fish 


thou hast a mind perhaps to make an exception for these two ladies 
with all my heart my clarissa has if woman has a soul capable of
friendship her flame is bright and steady but miss howe's were it
not kept up by her mother's opposition is too vehement to endure how
often have i known opposition not only cement friendship but create
love i doubt not but poor hickman would fare the better with this
vixen if her mother were as heartily against him as she is for him 

thus much indeed as to these two ladies i will grant thee that the
active spirit of the one and the meek disposition of the other may make
their friendship more durable than it would otherwise be for this is
certain that in every friendship whether male or female there must be
a man and a woman spirit that is to say one of them must be a
forbearing one to make it permanent 

but this i pronounce as a truth which all experience confirms that
friendship between women never holds to the sacrifice of capital
gratifications or to the endangering of life limb or estate as it
often does in our nobler sex 

well but next comes an indictment against poor beauty what has beauty
done that miss howe should be offended at it miss howe jack is a
charming girl she has no reason to quarrel with beauty didst ever see
her too much fire and spirit in her eye indeed for a girl but
that's no fault with a man that can lower that fire and spirit at
pleasure and i know i am the man that can 

for my own part when i was first introduced to this lady which was by
my goddess when she herself was a visiter at mrs howe's i had not been
half an hour with her but i even hungered and thirsted after a romping
bout with the lively rogue and in the second or third visit was more
deterred by the delicacy of her friend than by what i apprehended from
her own this charming creature's presence thought i awes us both 
and i wished her absence though any other woman were present that i
might try the differences in miss howe's behaviour before her friend's
face or behind her back 

delicate women make delicate women as well as decent men with all miss
howe's fire and spirit it was easy to see by her very eye that she
watched for lessons and feared reproof from the penetrating eye of her
milder dispositioned friend and yet it was as easy to observe in the
candour and sweet manners of the other that the fear which miss howe
stood in of her was more owing to her own generous apprehension that she
fell short of her excellencies than to miss harlowe's consciousness of
excellence over her i have often since i came at miss howe's letters 
revolved this just and fine praise contained in one of them every one
saw that the preference they gave you to themselves exalted you not into
any visible triumph over them for you had always something to say on
every point you carried that raised the yielding heart and left every
one pleased and satisfied with themselves though they carried not off
the palm 


 miss howe in vol iii letter xix says that she was always more
afraid of clarissa than of her mother and in vol iii letter xliv 
that she fears her almost as much as she loves her and in many other
places in her letters verifies this observation of lovelace 
 see vol iv letter xxxi 


as i propose in a more advanced life to endeavour to atone for my
useful freedoms with individuals of the sex by giving cautions and
instructions to the whole i have made a memorandum to enlarge upon this
doctrine to wit that it is full as necessary to direct daughters in
the choice of their female companions as it is to guard them against the
designs of men 

i say not this however to the disparagement of miss howe she has from
pride what her friend has from principle  the lord help the sex if
they had not pride   but yet i am confident that miss howe is indebted
to the conversation and correspondence of miss harlowe for her highest
improvements but both these ladies out of the question i make no
scruple to aver  and i jack should know something of the matter   that
there have been more girls ruined at least prepared for ruin by their
own sex taking in servants as well as companions than directly by
the attempts and delusions of men 

but it is time enough when i am old and joyless to enlarge upon this
topic 

as to the comparison between the two ladies i will expatiate more on
that subject for i like it when i have had them both which this
letter of the vixen girl's i hope thou wilt allow warrants me to try
for 

i return to the consideration of a few more of its contents to justify
my vengeances so nearly now in view 

as to mrs townsend her manlike spirit her two brothers and the
ships' crews i say nothing but this to the insolent threatening let em
come but as to her sordid menace to repay the horrid villain as she
calls me for all my vileness by broken bones broken bones belford 
who can bear this porterly threatening broken bones jack d n the
little vulgar give me a name for her but i banish all furious
resentment if i get these two girls into my power heaven forbid that i
should be a second phalaris who turned his bull upon the artist no
bones of their's will i break they shall come off with me upon much
lighter terms 

but these fellows are smugglers it seems and am not i a smuggler too 
 i am and have not the least doubt but i shall have secured my goods
before thursday or wednesday either 

but did i want a plot what a charming new one does this letter of miss
howe strike me out i am almost sorry that i have fixed upon one for
here how easy would it be for me to assemble a crew of swabbers and to
create a mrs townsend whose person thou seest my beloved knows not 
to come on tuesday at miss howe's repeated solicitations in order to
carry my beloved to a warehouse of my own providing 

this however is my triumphant hope that at the very time that these
ragamuffins will be at hampstead looking for us my dear miss harlowe
and i  so the fates i imagine have ordained  shall be fast asleep in
each other's arms in town lie still villain till the time comes 
my heart jack my heart it is always thumping away on the remotest
prospects of this nature 

but it seems that the vileness of this specious monster  meaning me 
jack   has brought hickman into credit with her so i have done some
good but to whom i cannot tell for this poor fellow should i permit
him to have this termagant will be punished as many times we all are 
by the enjoyment of his own wishes nor can she be happy as i take it 
with him were he to govern himself by her will and have none of his
own since never was there a directing wife who knew where to stop power
makes such a one wanton she despises the man she can govern like
alexander who wept that he had no more worlds to conquer she will be
looking out for new exercises for her power till she grow uneasy to
herself a discredit to her husband and a plague to all about her 

but this honest fellow it seems with tears in his eyes and with humble
prostration besought the vixen to permit him to set out in his
chariot-and-four in order to give himself the glory of protecting such an
oppressed innocent in the face of the whole world nay he reddened it
seems and trembled too as he read the fair complainant's letter how
valiant is all this women love brave men and no wonder that his tears 
his trembling and his prostration gave him high reputation with the meek
miss howe 

but dost think jack that i in the like case and equally affected with
the distress should have acted thus dost think that i should not
first have rescued the lady and then if needful have asked excuse for
it the lady in my hand wouldst not thou have done thus as well as i 

but tis best as it is honest hickman may now sleep in a whole skin 
and yet that is more perhaps than he would have done the lady's
deliverance unattempted had i come at this requested permission of his
any other way than by a letter that it must not be known that i have
intercepted 

miss howe thinks i may be diverted from pursuing my charmer by some
new-started villany villany is a word that she is extremely fond of 
but i can tell her that it is impossible i should till the end of this
villany be obtained difficulty is a stimulus with such a spirit as mine 
i thought miss howe knew me better were she to offer herself person for
person in the romancing zeal of her friendship to save her friend it
should not do while the dear creature is on this side the moon 

she thanks heaven that her friend has received her letter of the 7th 
we are all glad of it she ought to thank me too but i will not at
present claim her thanks 

but when she rejoices that the letter went safe does she not in effect 
call out for vengeance and expect it all in good time miss howe 
when settest thou out for the isle of wight love 

i will close at this time with desiring thee to make a list of the
virulent terms with which the enclosed letter abounds and then if thou
supposest that i have made such another and have added to it all the
flowers of the same blow in the former letters of the same saucy
creature and those in that of miss harlowe which she left for me on her
elopement thou wilt certainly think that i have provocations sufficient
to justify me in all that i shall do to either 

return the enclosed the moment thou hast perused it 



letter viii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday night monday morning 


i went down with revenge in my heart the contents of miss howe's letter
almost engrossing me the moment that miss harlowe and mrs moore
 accompanied by miss rawlins came in but in my countenance all the
gentle the placid the serene that the glass could teach and in my
behaviour all the polite that such an unpolite creature as she has
often told me i am could put on 

miss rawlins was sent for home almost as soon as she came in to
entertain an unexpected visiter to her great regret as well as to the
disappointment of my fair-one as i could perceive from the looks of
both for they had agreed it seems if i went to town as i said i
intended to do to take a walk upon the heath at least in mrs moore's
garden and who knows what might have been the issue had the spirit of
curiosity in the one met with the spirit of communication in the other 

miss rawlins promised to return if possible but sent to excuse herself 
her visiter intending to stay with her all night 

i rejoiced in my heart at her message and after much supplication 
obtained the favour of my beloved's company for another walk in the
garden having as i told her abundance of things to say to propose 
and to be informed of in order ultimately to govern myself in my future
steps 

she had vouchsafed i should have told thee with eyes turned from me 
and in a half-aside attitude to sip two dishes of tea in my company 
dear soul how anger unpolishes the most polite for i never saw miss
harlowe behave so awkwardly i imagined she knew not how to be awkward 

when we were in the garden i poured my whole soul into her attentive
ear and besought her returning favour 

she told me that she had formed her scheme for her future life that 
vile as the treatment was which she had received from me that was not
all the reason she had for rejecting my suit but that on the maturest
deliberation she was convinced that she could neither be happy with me 
nor make me happy and she injoined me for both our sakes to think no
more of her 

the captain i told her was rid down post in a manner to forward my
wishes with her uncle lady betty and miss montague were undoubtedly
arrived in town by this time i would set out early in the morning to
attend them they adored her they longed to see her they would see
her they would not be denied her company in oxfordshire whither could
she better go to be free from her brother's insults whither to be
absolutely made unapprehensive of any body else might i have any hopes
of her returning favour if miss howe could be prevailed upon to
intercede for me 

miss howe prevailed upon to intercede for you repeated she with a
scornful bridle but a very pretty one and there she stopt 

i repeated the concern it would be to me to be under a necessity of
mentioning the misunderstanding to lady betty and my cousin as a
misunderstanding still to be made up and as if i were of very little
consequence to a dear creature who was of so much to me urging that
these circumstances would extremely lower me not only in my own opinion 
but in that of my relations 

but still she referred to miss howe's next letter and all the concession
i could bring her to in this whole conference was that she would wait
the arrival and visit of the two ladies if they came in a day or two or
before she received the expected letter from miss howe 

thank heaven for this thought i and now may i go to town with hopes at
my return to find thee dearest where i shall leave thee 

but yet as she may find reasons to change her mind in my absence i
shall not entirely trust to this my fellow therefore who is in the
house and who by mrs bevis's kind intelligence will know every step
she can take shall have andrew and a horse ready to give me immediate
notice of her motions and moreover go whither she will he shall be one
of her retinue though unknown to herself if possible 

this was all i could make of the fair inexorable should i be glad of
it or sorry for it 

glad i believe and yet my pride is confoundedly abated to think that i
had so little hold in the affections of this daughter of the harlowes 

don't tell me that virtue and principle are her guides on this occasion 
 tis pride a greater pride than my own that governs her love she
has none thou seest nor ever had at least not in a superior degree 
love that deserves the name never was under the dominion of prudence 
or of any reasoning power she cannot bear to be thought a woman i
warrant and if in the last attempt i find her not one what will she
be the worse for the trial no one is to blame for suffering an evil he
cannot shun or avoid 

were a general to be overpowered and robbed by a highwayman would he be
less fit for the command of an army on that account if indeed the
general pretending great valour and having boasted that he never would
be robbed were to make but faint resistance when he was brought to the
test and to yield his purse when he was master of his own sword then
indeed will the highwayman who robs him be thought the braver man 

but from these last conferences am i furnished with one argument in
defence of my favourite purpose which i never yet pleaded 

o jack what a difficulty must a man be allowed to have to conquer a
predominant passion be it what it will when the gratifying of it is in
his power however wrong he knows it to be to resolve to gratify it 
reflect upon this and then wilt thou be able to account for if not to
excuse a projected crime which has habit to plead for it in a breast
as stormy as uncontroulable 

this that follows is my new argument 

should she fail in the trial should i succeed and should she refuse to
go on with me and even resolve not to marry me of which i can have no
notion and should she disdain to be obliged to me for the handsome
provision i should be proud to make for her even to the half of my
estate yet cannot she be altogether unhappy is she not entitled to an
independent fortune will not col morden as her trustee put her in
possession of it and did she not in our former conference point out the
way of life that she always preferred to the married life to wit to
take her good norton for her directress and guide and to live upon her
own estate in the manner her grandfather desired she should live  


 see letter iii of this volume 


it is moreover to be considered that she cannot according to her own
notions recover above one half of her fame were we not to intermarry 
so much does she think she has suffered by her going off with me and
will she not be always repining and mourning for the loss of the other
half and if she must live a life of such uneasiness and regret for
half may she not as well repine and mourn for the whole 

nor let me tell thee will her own scheme or penitence in this case be
half so perfect if she do not fall as if she does for what a foolish
penitent will she make who has nothing to repent of she piques
herself thou knowest and makes it matter of reproach to me that she
went not off with me by her own consent but was tricked out of herself 

nor upbraid thou me upon the meditated breach of vows so repeatedly made 
she will not thou seest permit me to fulfil them and if she would 
this i have to say that at the time i made the most solemn of them i
was fully determined to keep them but what prince thinks himself
obliged any longer to observe the articles of treaties the most sacredly
sworn to than suits with his interest or inclination although the
consequence of the infraction must be as he knows the destruction of
thousands 

is not this then the result of all that miss clarissa harlowe if it be
not her own fault may be as virtuous after she has lost her honour as
it is called as she was before she may be a more eminent example to
her sex and if she yield a little yield in the trial may be a
completer penitent nor can she but by her own wilfulness be reduced
to low fortunes 

and thus may her old nurse and she an old coachman and a pair of old
coach-horses and two or three old maid-servants and perhaps a very old
footman or two for every thing will be old and penitential about her 
live very comfortably together reading old sermons and old
prayer-books and relieving old men and old women and giving old lessons 
and old warnings upon new subjects as well as old ones to the young
ladies of her neighbourhood and so pass on to a good old age doing a
great deal of good both by precept and example in her generation 

and is a woman who can live thus prettily without controul who ever did
prefer and who still prefers the single to the married life and who
will be enabled to do every thing that the plan she had formed will
direct her to do to be said to be ruined undone and such sort of
stuff i have no patience with the pretty fools who use those strong
words to describe a transitory evil an evil which a mere church-form
makes none 

at this rate of romancing how many flourishing ruins dost thou as well
as i know let us but look about us and we shall see some of the
haughtiest and most censorious spirits among out acquaintance of that sex
now passing for chaste wives of whom strange stories might be told and
others whose husbands' hearts have been made to ache for their gaieties 
both before and after marriage and yet know not half so much of them as
some of us honest fellows could tell them 

but having thus satisfied myself in relation to the worst that can
happen to this charming creature and that it will be her own fault if
she be unhappy i have not at all reflected upon what is likely to be my
own lot 

this has always been my notion though miss howe grudges us rakes the
best of the sex and says that the worst is too good for us that the
wife of a libertine ought to be pure spotless uncontaminated to what
purpose has such a one lived a free life but to know the world and to
make his advantages of it and to be very serious it would be a
misfortune to the public for two persons heads of a family to be both
bad since between two such a race of varlets might be propagated
 lovelaces and belfords if thou wilt who might do great mischief in the
world 

thou seest at bottom that i am not an abandoned fellow and that there is
a mixture of gravity in me this as i grow older may increase and
when my active capacity begins to abate i may sit down with the
preacher and resolve all my past life into vanity and vexation of
spirit 

this is certain that i shall never find a woman so well suited to my
taste as miss clarissa harlowe i only wish that i may have such a lady
as her to comfort and adorn my setting sun i have often thought it very
unhappy for us both that so excellent a creature sprang up a little too
late for my setting out and a little too early in my progress before i
can think of returning and yet as i have picked up the sweet traveller
in my way i cannot help wishing that she would bear me company in the
rest of my journey although she were stepping out of her own path to
oblige me and then perhaps we could put up in the evening at the same
inn and be very happy in each other's conversation recounting the
difficulties and dangers we had passed in our way to it 

i imagine that thou wilt be apt to suspect that some passages in this
letter were written in town why jack i cannot but say that the
westminster air is a little grosser than that at hampstead and the
conversation of mrs sinclair and the nymphs less innocent than mrs 
moore's and miss rawlins's and i think in my heart i can say and write
those things at one place which i cannot at the other nor indeed any
where else 

i came to town about seven this morning all necessary directions and
precautions remembered to be given 

i besought the favour of an audience before i set out i was desirous
to see which of her lovely faces she was pleased to put on after another
night had passed but she was resolved i found to leave our quarrel
open she would not give me an opportunity so much as to entreat her
again to close it before the arrival of lady betty and my cousin 

i had notice from my proctor by a few lines brought by a man and horse 
just before i set out that all difficulties had been for two days past
surmounted and that i might have the license for fetching 

i sent up the letter to my beloved by mrs bevis with a repeated
request for admittance to her presence upon it but neither did this
stand me in stead i suppose she thought it would be allowing of the
consequences that were naturally to be expected to follow the obtaining
of this instrument if she had consented to see me on the contents of
this letter having refused me that honour before i sent it up to her 
no surprising her no advantage to be taken of her inattention to the
nicest circumstances 

and now belford i set out upon business 



letter ix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday june 12 


durst ever see a license jack 

edmund by divine permission lord bishop of london to our well-beloved
in christ robert lovelace  your servant my good lord what have i
done to merit so much goodness who never saw your lordship in my life  
of the parish of st martin's in the fields bachelor and clarissa
harlowe of the same parish spinster sendeth greeting whereas ye are 
as is alleged determined to enter into the holy state of matrimony  this
is only alleged thou observest  by and with the consent of etc etc etc 
and are very desirous of obtaining your marriage to be solemnized in the
face of the church we are willing that your honest desires  honest
desires jack   may more speedily have their due effect and therefore 
that ye may be able to procure such marriage to be freely and lawfully
solemnized in the parish church of st martin's in the fields or st 
giles's in the fields in the county of middlesex by the rector vicar 
or curate thereof at any time of the year  at any time of the year 
jack   without publication of bans provided that by reason of any
pre-contract  i verily think that i have had three or four pre-contracts
in my time but the good girls have not claimed upon them of a long
while   consanguinity affinity or any other lawful cause whatsoever 
there be no lawful impediment on this behalf and that there be not at
this time any action suit plaint quarrel or demand moved or depending
before any judge ecclesiastical or temporal for or concerning any
marriage contracted by or with either of you and that the said marriage
be openly solemnized in the church above-mentioned between the hours of
eight and twelve in the forenoon and without prejudice to the minister of
the place where the said woman is a parishioner we do hereby for good
causes  it cost me let me see jack what did it cost me   give and
grant our license as well to you as to the parties contracting as to the
rector vicar or curate of the said church where the said marriage is
intended to be solemnized to solemnize the same in manner and form above
specified according to the rites and ceremonies prescribed in the book of
common prayer in that behalf published by authority of parliament 
provided always that if hereafter any fraud shall appear to have been
committed at the time of granting this license either by false
suggestions or concealment of the truth  now this belford is a little
hard upon us for i cannot say that every one of our suggestions is
literally true so in good conscience i ought not to marry under this
license   the license shall be void to all intents and purposes as if the
same had not been granted and in that case we do inhibit all ministers
whatsoever if any thing of the premises shall come to their knowledge 
from proceeding to the celebration of the said marriage without first
consulting us or our vicar-general given  etc 

then follow the register's name and a large pendent seal with these
words round it seal of the vicar-general and official principal of the
diocese of london 

a good whimsical instrument take it altogether but what thinkest
thou are the arms to this matrimonial harbinger why in the first
place two crossed swords to show that marriage is a state of offence
as well as defence three lions to denote that those who enter into the
state ought to have a triple proportion of courage and  couldst thou
have imagined that these priestly fellows in so solemn a case would cut
their jokes upon poor souls who came to have their honest desires put in
a way to be gratified   there are three crooked horns smartly
top-knotted with ribands which being the ladies' wear seem to indicate
that they may very probably adorn as well as bestow the bull's feather 

to describe it according to heraldry art if i am not mistaken gules 
two swords saltire-wise or second coat a chevron sable between three
bugle-horns or  so it ought to be  on a chief of the second three
lions rampant of the first but the devil take them for their
hieroglyphics should i say if i were determined in good earnest to
marry 

and determined to marry i would be were it not for this consideration 
that once married and i am married for life 

that's the plague of it could a man do as the birds do change every
valentine's day  a natural appointment for birds have not the sense 
forsooth to fetter themselves as we wiseacre men take great and solemn
pains to do   there would be nothing at all in it and what a glorious
time would the lawyers have on the one hand with their noverini
universi's and suits commenceable on restitution of goods and chattels 
and the parsons on the other with their indulgencies  renewable
annually as other licenses  to the honest desires of their clients 

then were a stated mullet according to rank or fortune to be paid on
every change towards the exigencies of the state  but none on renewals
with the old lives for the sake of encouraging constancy especially
among the minores  the change would be made sufficiently difficult and
the whole public would be the better for it while those children which
the parents could not agree about maintaining might be considered as the
children of the public and provided for like the children of the antient
spartans who were as ours would in this case be a nation of heroes 
how jack could i have improved upon lycurgus's institutions had i been
a lawgiver 

did i never show thee a scheme which i drew up on such a notion as this 
 in which i demonstrated the conveniencies and obviated the
inconveniencies of changing the present mode to this i believe i never
did 

i remember i proved to a demonstration that such a change would be a
mean of annihilating absolutely annihilating four or five very
atrocious and capital sins rapes vulgarly so called adultery and
fornication nor would polygamy be panted after frequently would it
prevent murders and duelling hardly any such thing as jealousy the
cause of shocking violences would be heard of and hypocrisy between man
and wife be banished the bosoms of each nor probably would the
reproach of barrenness rest as it now too often does where it is least
deserved nor would there possibly be such a person as a barren woman 

moreover what a multitude of domestic quarrels would be avoided where
such a scheme carried into execution since both sexes would bear with
each other in the view that they could help themselves in a few months 

and then what a charming subject for conversation would be the gallant
and generous last partings between man and wife each perhaps a new
mate in eye and rejoicing secretly in the manumission could afford to
be complaisantly sorrowful in appearance he presented her with this
jewel it will be said by the reporter for example sake she him with
that how he wept how she sobb'd how they looked after one another 
yet that's the jest of it neither of them wishing to stand another
twelvemonth's trial 

and if giddy fellows or giddy girls misbehave in a first marriage 
whether from noviceship having expected to find more in the matter than
can be found or from perverseness on her part or positiveness on his 
each being mistaken in the other  a mighty difference jack in the same
person an inmate or a visiter  what a fine opportunity will each have 
by this scheme of recovering a lost character and of setting all right
in the next adventure 

and o jack with what joy with what rapture would the changelings or
changeables if thou like that word better number the weeks the days 
the hours as the annual obligation approached to its desirable period 

as for the spleen or vapours no such malady would be known or heard of 
the physical tribe would indeed be the sufferers and the only
sufferers since fresh health and fresh spirits the consequences of
sweet blood and sweet humours the mind and body continually pleased with
each other would perpetually flow in and the joys of expectation the
highest of all our joys would invigorate and keep all alive 

but that no body of men might suffer the physicians i thought might
turn parsons as there would be a great demand for parsons besides as
they would be partakers in the general benefit they must be sorry
fellows indeed if they preferred themselves to the public 

every one would be married a dozen times at least both men and women
would be careful of their characters and polite in their behaviour as
well as delicate in their persons and elegant in their dress  a great
matte each of these let me tell thee to keep passion alive   either to
induce a renewal with the old love or to recommend themselves to a new 
while the newspapers would be crowded with paragraphs all the world
their readers as all the world would be concerned to see who and who's
together 

yesterday for instance entered into the holy state of matrimony   we
should all speak reverently of matrimony then   the right honourable
robert earl lovelace'  i shall be an earl by that time   with her grace
the duchess dowager of fifty-manors his lordship's one-and-thirtieth
wife  i shall then be contented perhaps to take up as it is called 
with a widow but she must not have had more than one husband neither 
thou knowest that i am nice in these particulars 

i know jack that thou for thy part wilt approve of my scheme 

as lord m and i between us have three or four boroughs at command i
think i will get into parliament in order to bring in a bill for this
good purpose 

neither will the house of parliament nor the houses of convocation have
reason to object it and all the courts whether spiritual or sensual 
civil or uncivil will find their account in it when passed into a law 

by my soul jack i should be apprehensive of a general insurrection and
that incited by the women were such a bill to be thrown out for here
is the excellency of the scheme the women will have equal reason with
the men to be pleased with it 

dost think that old prerogative harlowe for example must not if such
a law were in being have pulled in his horns so excellent a wife as he
has would never else have renewed with such a gloomy tyrant who as
well as all other married tyrants must have been upon good behaviour
from year to year 

a termagant wife if such a law were to pass would be a phoenix 

the churches would be the only market-place for the fair sex and
domestic excellence the capital recommendation 

nor would there be an old maid in great britain and all its territories 
for what an odd soul must she be who could not have her twelvemonth's
trial 

in short a total alteration for the better in the morals and way of
life in both sexes must in a very few years be the consequence of such
a salutary law 

who would have expected such a one from me i wish the devil owe me not
a spite for it 

the would not the distinction be very pretty jack as in flowers such
a gentleman or such a lady is an annual such a one is a perennial 

one difficulty however as i remember occurred to me upon the
probability that a wife might be enceinte as the lawyers call it but
thus i obviated it 

that no man should be allowed to marry another woman without his then
wife's consent till she were brought-to-bed and he had defrayed all
incident charges and till it was agreed upon between them whether the
child should be his her's or the public's the women in this case to
have what i call the coercive option for i would not have it in the
man's power to be a dog neither 

and indeed i gave the turn of the scale in every part of my scheme in
the women's favour for dearly do i love the sweet rogues 

how infinitely more preferable this my scheme to the polygamy one of the
old patriarchs who had wives and concubines without number i believe
david and solomon had their hundreds at a time had they not jack 

let me add that annual parliaments and annual marriages are the
projects next my heart how could i expatiate upon the benefits that
would arise from both 



letter x

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


well but now my plots thicken and my employment of writing to thee on
this subject will soon come to a conclusion for now having got the
license and mrs townsend with her tars being to come to hampstead next
wednesday or thursday and another letter possibly or message from miss
howe to inquire how miss harlowe does upon the rustic's report of her
ill health and to express her wonder that she has not heard form her in
answer to her's on her escape i must soon blow up the lady or be blown
up myself and so i am preparing with lady betty and my cousin
montague to wait upon my beloved with a coach-and-four or a sett for
lady betty will not stir out with a pair for the world though but for
two or three miles and this is a well-known part of her character 

but as to the arms and crest upon the coach and trappings 

dost thou not know that a blunt's must supply her while her own is new
lining and repairing an opportunity she is willing to take now she is
in town nothing of this kind can be done to her mind in the country 
liveries nearly lady betty's 

thou hast seen lady betty lawrance several times hast thou not belford 

no never in my life 

but thou hast and lain with her too or fame does thee more credit than
thou deservest why jack knowest thou not lady betty's other name 

other name has she two 

she has and what thinkest thou of lady bab wallis 

o the devil 

now thou hast it lady barbara thou knowest lifted up in circumstances 
and by pride never appears or produces herself but on occasions special
 to pass to men of quality or price for a duchess or countess at
least she has always been admired for a grandeur in her air that few
women of quality can come up to and never was supposed to be other than
what she passed for though often and often a paramour for lords 

and who thinkest thou is my cousin montague 

nay how should i know 

how indeed why my little johanetta golding a lively yet
modest-looking girl is my cousin montague 

there belford is an aunt there's a cousin both have wit at will 
both are accustomed to ape quality both are genteelly descended 
mistresses of themselves and well educated yet past pity true spartan
dames ashamed of nothing but detection always therefore upon their
guard against that and in their own conceit when assuming top parts 
the very quality they ape 

and how dost think i dress them out i'll tell thee 

lady betty in a rich gold tissue adorned with jewels of high price 

my cousin montague in a pale pink standing on end with silver flowers of
her own working charlotte as well as my beloved is admirable at her
needle not quite so richly jewell'd out as lady betty but ear-rings
and solitaire very valuable and infinitely becoming 

johanetta thou knowest has a good complexion a fine neck and ears
remarkably fine so has charlotte she is nearly of charlotte's stature
too 

laces both the richest that could be procured 

thou canst not imagine what a sum the loan of the jewels cost me though
but for three days 

this sweet girl will half ruin me but seest thou not by this time 
that her reign is short it must be so and mrs sinclair has already
prepared every thing for her reception once more 


 


here come the ladies attended by susan morrison a tenant-farmer's
daughter as lady betty's woman with her hands before her and
thoroughly instructed 

how dress advantages women especially those who have naturally a
genteel air and turn and have had education 

hadst thou seen how they paraded it cousin and cousin and nephew at
every word lady betty bridling and looking haughtily-condescending 
charlotte galanting her fan and swimming over the floor without touching
it 

how i long to see my niece-elect cries one for they are told that we
are not married and are pleased that i have not put the slight upon them
that they had apprehended from me 

how i long to see my dear cousin that is to be the other 

your la'ship and your la'ship and an awkward courtesy at every address
 prim susan morrison 

top your parts ye villains you know how nicely i distinguish there
will be no passion in this case to blind the judgment and to help on
meditated delusion as when you engage with titled sinners my charmer
is as cool and as distinguishing though not quite so learned in her own
sex as i am your commonly-assumed dignity won't do for me now airs
of superiority as if born to rank but no over-do doubting nothing 
let not your faces arraign your hearts 

easy and unaffected your very dresses will give you pride enough 

a little graver lady betty more significance less bridling in your
dignity 

that's the air charmingly hit again you have it 

devil take you less arrogance you are got into airs of young quality 
be less sensible of your new condition people born to dignity command
respect without needing to require it 

now for your part cousin charlotte 

pretty well but a little too frolicky that air yet have i prepared my
beloved to expect in you both great vivacity and quality-freedom 

curse those eyes those glancings will never do a down-cast bashful
turn if you can command it look upon me suppose me now to be my
beloved 

devil take that leer too significantly arch once i knew you the girl
i would now have you to be 

sprightly but not confident cousin charlotte be sure forget not to
look down or aside when looked at when eyes meet eyes be your's the
retreating ones your face will bear examination 

o lord lord that so young a creature can so soon forget the innocent
appearance she first charmed by and which i thought born with you all 
five years to ruin what twenty had been building up how natural the
latter lesson how difficult to regain the former 

a stranger as i hope to be saved to the principal arts of your sex 
once more what a devil has your heart to do in your eyes 

have i not told you that my beloved is a great observer of the eyes 
she once quoted upon me a text which showed me how she came by her
knowledge dorcas's were found guilty of treason the first moment she
saw her 


 eccles xxvi the whoredom of a woman may be known in her haughty
looks and eye-lids watch over an impudent eye and marvel not if it
trespass against thee 


once more suppose me to be my charmer now you are to encounter my
examining eye and my doubting heart 

that's my dear 

study that air in the pier-glass 

charmingly perfectly right 

your honours now devils 

pretty well cousin charlotte for a young country lady till form
yields to familiarity you may courtesy low you must not be supposed
to have forgot your boarding-school airs 

but too low too low lady betty for your years and your quality the
common fault of your sex will be your danger aiming to be young too
long the devil's in you all when you judge of yourselves by your
wishes and by your vanity fifty in that case is never more than
fifteen 

graceful ease conscious dignity like that of my charmer oh how hard
to hit 

both together now 

charming that's the air lady betty that's the cue cousin charlotte 
suited to the character of each but once more be sure to have a guard
upon your eyes 

never fear nephew 

never fear cousin 

a dram of barbadoes each 

and now we are gone 



letter xi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
at mrs sinclair's monday afternoon 


all's right as heart can wish in spite of all objection in spite of a
reluctance next to faintings in spite of all foresight vigilance 
suspicion once more is the charmer of my soul in her old lodgings 

now throbs away every pulse now thump thump thumps my bounding heart
for something 

but i have not time for the particulars of our management 

my beloved is now directing some of her clothes to be packed up never
more to enter this house nor ever more will she i dare say when once
again out of it 

yet not so much as a condition of forgiveness the harlowe-spirited
fair-one will not deserve my mercy she will wait for miss howe's next
letter and then if she find a difficulty in her new schemes  thank her
for nothing   will will what why even then will take time to
consider whether i am to be forgiven or for ever rejected an
indifference that revives in my heart the remembrance of a thousand of
the like nature and yet lady betty and miss montague  a man would be
tempted to think jack that they wish her to provoke my vengeance  
declare that i ought to be satisfied with such a proud suspension 

they are entirely attached to her whatever she says is must be 
gospel they are guarantees for her return to hampstead this night 
they are to go back with her a supper bespoken by lady betty at mrs 
moore's all the vacant apartments there by my permission for i had
engaged them for a month certain to be filled with them and their
attendants for a week at least or till they can prevail upon the dear
perverse as they hope they shall to restore me to her favour and to
accompany lady betty to oxfordshire 

the dear creature has thus far condescended that she will write to miss
howe and acquaint her with the present situation of things 

if she write i shall see what she writes but i believe she will have
other employment soon 

lady betty is sure she tells her that she shall prevail upon her to
forgive me though she dares say that i deserve not forgiveness lady
betty is too delicate to inquire strictly into the nature of my offence 
but it must be an offence against herself against miss montague against
the virtuous of the whole sex or it could not be so highly resented 
yet she will not leave her till she forgive me and till she see our
nuptials privately celebrated mean time as she approves of her uncle's
expedient she will address her as already my wife before strangers 

stedman her solicitor may attend her for orders in relation to her
chancery affair at hampstead not one hour they can be favoured with 
will they lose from the company and conversation of so dear so charming
a new relation 

hard then if she had not obliged them with her company in their
coach-and-four to and from their cousin leeson's who longed as they
themselves had done to see a lady so justly celebrated 

how will lord m be raptured when he sees her and can salute her as his
niece 

how will lady sarah bless herself she will now think her loss of the
dear daughter she mourns for happily supplied 

miss montague dwells upon every word that falls from her lips she
perfectly adores her new cousin for her cousin she must be and her
cousin will she call her she answers for equal admiration in her sister
patty 

ay cry i whispering loud enough for her to hear how will my cousin
patty's dove's eyes glisten and run over on the very first interview 
so gracious so noble so unaffected a dear creature 

what a happy family  chorus we all will our's be 

these and such like congratulatory admirations every hour repeated her
modesty hurt by the ecstatic praises her graces are too natural to
herself for her to be proud of them but she must be content to be
punished for excellencies that cast a shade upon the most excellent 

in short we are here as at hampstead all joy and rapture all of us
except my beloved in whose sweet face  her almost fainting reluctance
to re-enter these doors not overcome   reigns a kind of anxious serenity 
 but how will even that be changed in a few hours 

methinks i begin to pity the half-apprehensive beauty but avaunt thou
unseasonably-intruding pity thou hast more than once already well nigh
undone me and adieu reflection begone consideration and
commiseration i dismiss ye all for at least a week to come but
remembered her broken word her flight when my fond soul was meditating
mercy to her be remembered her treatment of me in her letter on her
escape to hampstead her hampstead virulence what is it she ought not
to expect from an unchained beelzebub and a plotting villain 

be her preference of the single life to me also remembered that she
despises me that she even refuses to be my wife a proud lovelace to
be denied a wife to be more proudly rejected by a daughter of the
harlowes the ladies of my own family  she thinks them the ladies of
my family   supplicating in vain for her returning favour to their
despised kinsman and taking laws from her still prouder punctilio 

be the execrations of her vixen friend likewise remembered poured out
upon me from her representations and thereby made her own execrations 

be remembered still more particularly the townsend plot set on foot
between them and now in a day or two ready to break out and the
sordid threatening thrown out against me by that little fury 

is not this the crisis for which i have been long waiting shall
tomlinson shall these women be engaged shall so many engines be set
at work at an immense expense with infinite contrivance and all to
no purpose 

is not this the hour of her trial and in her of the trial of the virtue
of her whole sex so long premeditated so long threatened whether her
frost be frost indeed whether her virtue be principle whether if
once subdued she will not be always subdued and will she not want the
crown of her glory the proof of her till now all-surpassing excellence 
if i stop short of the ultimate trial 

now is the end of purposes long over-awed often suspended at hand and
need i go throw the sins of her cursed family into the too-weighty scale 

 abhorred be force be the thoughts of force there's no triumph over
the will in force   this i know i have said but would i not have
avoided it if i could have i not tried every other method and have i
any other resource left me can she resent the last outrage more than
she has resented a fainter effort and if her resentments run ever so
high cannot i repair by matrimony she will not refuse me i know 
jack the haughty beauty will not refuse me when her pride of being
corporally inviolate is brought down when she can tell no tales but
when be her resistance what it will even her own sex will suspect a
yielding in resistance and when that modesty which may fill her bosom
with resentment will lock up her speech 


 vol iv letter xlviii 


but how know i that i have not made my own difficulties is she not a
woman what redress lies for a perpetuated evil must she not live 
her piety will secure her life and will not time be my friend what 
in a word will be her behaviour afterwards she cannot fly me she
must forgive me and as i have often said once forgiven will be for
ever forgiven 

why then should this enervating pity unsteel my foolish heart 

it shall not all these things will i remember and think of nothing
else in order to keep up a resolution which the women about me will
have it i shall be still unable to hold 

i'll teach the dear charming creature to emulate me in contrivance i'll
teach her to weave webs and plots against her conqueror i'll show her 
that in her smuggling schemes she is but a spider compared to me and
that she has all this time been spinning only a cobweb 


 


what shall we do now we are immersed in the depth of grief and
apprehension how ill do women bear disappointment set upon going to
hampstead and upon quitting for ever a house she re-entered with
infinite reluctance what things she intended to take with her ready
packed up herself on tiptoe to be gone and i prepared to attend her
thither she begins to be afraid that she shall not go this night and in
grief and despair has flung herself into her old apartment locked
herself in and through the key-hole dorcas sees her on her knees 
praying i suppose for a safe deliverance 

and from what and wherefore these agonizing apprehensions 

why here this unkind lady betty with the dear creature's knowledge 
though to her concern and this mad-headed cousin montague without it 
while she was employed in directing her package have hurried away in the
coach to their own lodgings  only indeed to put up some night-clothes 
and so forth in order to attend their sweet cousin to hampstead   and 
no less to my surprise than her's are not yet returned 

i have sent to know the meaning of it 

in a great hurry of spirits she would have had me to go myself hardly
any pacifying her the girl god bless her is wild with her own idle
apprehensions what is she afraid of 

i curse them both for their delay my tardy villain how he stays 
devil fetch them let them send their coach and we'll go without them 
in her hearing i bid the fellow tell them so perhaps he stays to bring
the coach if any thing happens to hinder the ladies from attending my
beloved this night 


 


devil take them again say i they promised too they would not stay 
because it was but two nights ago that a chariot was robbed at the foot
of hampstead-hill which alarmed my fair-one when told of it 

oh here's lady betty's servant with a billet 


to robert lovelace esq 
monday night 

excuse us my dear nephew i beseech you to my dearest kinswoman one
night cannot break squares for here miss montague has been taken
violently ill with three fainting fits one after another the hurry of
her joy i believe to find your dear lady so much surpass all
expectations  never did family love you know reign so strong as among
us   and the too eager desire she had to attend her have occasioned it 
for she has but weak spirits poor girl well as she looks 

if she be better we will certainly go with you tomorrow morning after
we have breakfasted with her at your lodgings but whether she be or
not i will do myself the pleasure to attend your lady to hampstead and
will be with you for that purpose about nine in the morning with due
compliments to your most worthily beloved i am

your's affectionately 
elizab lawrance 


 


faith and troth jack i know not what to do with myself for here just
now having sent in the above note by dorcas out came my beloved with it
in her hand in a fit of phrensy true by my soul 

she had indeed complained of her head all the evening 

dorcas ran to me out of breath to tell me that her lady was coming in
some strange way but she followed her so quick that the frighted wench
had not time to say in what way 

it seems when she read the billet now indeed said she am i a lost
creature o the poor clarissa harlowe 

she tore off her head-clothes inquired where i was and in she came her
shining tresses flowing about her neck her ruffles torn and hanging in
tatters about her snowy hands with her arms spread out her eyes wildly
turned as if starting from their orbits down sunk she at my feet as
soon as she approached me her charming bosom heaving to her uplifted
face and clasping her arms about my knees dear lovelace said she if
ever if ever if ever and unable to speak another word quitting her
clasping hold down prostrate on the floor sunk she neither in a fit
nor out of one 

i was quite astonished all my purposes suspended for a few moments i
knew neither what to say nor what to do but recollecting myself am i
again thought i in a way to be overcome and made a fool of if i now
recede i am gone for ever 

i raised her but down she sunk as if quite disjointed her limbs
failing her yet not in a fit neither i never heard of or saw such a
dear unaccountable almost lifeless and speechless too for a few
moments what must her apprehensions be at that moment and for what 
an high-notioned dear soul pretty ignorance thought i 

never having met with so sincere so unquestionable a repugnance i was
staggered i was confounded yet how should i know that it would be so
till i tried and how having proceeded thus far could i stop were i
not to have had the women to goad me on and to make light of
circumstances which they pretended to be better judges of than i 

i lifted her however into a chair and in words of disordered passion 
told her all her fears were needless wondered at them begged of her to
be pacified besought her reliance on my faith and honour and revowed
all my old vows and poured forth new ones 

at last with a heart-breaking sob i see i see mr lovelace in broken
sentences she spoke i see i see that at last i am ruined ruined if
your pity let me implore your pity and down on her bosom like a
half-broken-stalked lily top-heavy with the overcharging dews of the
morning sunk her head with a sigh that went to my heart 

all i could think of to re-assure her when a little recovered i said 

why did i not send for their coach as i had intimated it might return
in the morning for the ladies 

i had actually done so i told her on seeing her strange uneasiness 
but it was then gone to fetch a doctor for miss montague lest his
chariot should not be so ready 

ah lovelace said she with a doubting face anguish in her imploring
eye 

lady betty would think it very strange i told her if she were to know
it was so disagreeable to her to stay one night for her company in the
house where she had passed so many 

she called me names upon this she had called me names before i was
patient 

let her go to lady betty's lodgings then directly go if the person i
called lady betty was really lady betty 

if my dear good heaven what a villain does that if show you believe
me to be 

i cannot help it i beseech you once more let me go to mrs leeson's if
that if ought not to be said 

then assuming a more resolute spirit i will go i will inquire my way 
 i will go by myself and would have rushed by me 

i folded my arms about her to detain her pleading the bad way i heard
poor charlotte was in and what a farther concern her impatience if she
went would give to poor charlotte 

she would believe nothing i said unless i would instantly order a coach 
 since she was not to have lady betty's nor was permitted to go to mrs 
leeson's and let her go in it to hampstead late as it was and all
alone so much the better for in the house of people of whom lady betty 
upon inquiry had heard a bad character  dropt foolishly this by my
prating new relation in order to do credit to herself by depreciating
others   every thing and every face looking with so much meaning
vileness as well as my own  thou art still too sensible thought i my
charmer   she was resolved not to stay another night 

dreading what might happen as to her intellects and being very
apprehensive that she might possibly go through a great deal before
morning though more violent she could not well be with the worst she
dreaded i humoured her and ordered will to endeavour to get a coach
directly to carry us to hampstead i cared not at what price 

robbers with whom i would have terrified her she feared not i was all
her fear i found and this house her terror for i saw plainly that she
now believed that lady betty and miss montague were both impostors 

but her mistrust is a little of the latest to do her service 

and o jack the rage of love the rage of revenge is upon me by turns
they tear me the progress already made the women's instigations the
power i shall have to try her to the utmost and still to marry her if
she be not to be brought to cohabitation let me perish belford if she
escape me now 


 


will is not yet come back near eleven 


 


will is this moment returned no coach to be got either for love or
money 

once more she urges to mrs leeson's let me go lovelace good
lovelace let me go to mrs leeson's what is miss montague's illness
to my terror for the almighty's sake mr lovelace her hands
clasped 

o my angel what a wildness is this do you know do you see my
dearest life what appearances your causeless apprehensions have given
you do you know it is past eleven o'clock 

twelve one two three four any hour i care not if you mean me
honourably let me go out of this hated house 

thou'lt observe belford that though this was written afterwards yet 
 as in other places i write it as it was spoken and happened as if i
had retired to put down every sentence spoken i know thou likest this
lively present-tense manner as it is one of my peculiars 

just as she had repeated the last words if you mean me honourably let
me go out of this hated house in came mrs sinclair in a great ferment
 and what pray madam has this house done to you mr lovelace you
have known me some time and if i have not the niceness of this lady i
hope i do not deserve to be treated thus 

she set her huge arms akimbo hoh madam let me tell you that i am
amazed at your freedoms with my character and mr lovelace  holding
up and violently shaking her head   if you are a gentleman and a man of
honour 

having never before seen any thing but obsequiousness in this woman 
little as she liked her she was frighted at her masculine air and
fierce look god help me cried she what will become of me now then 
turning her head hither and thither in a wild kind of amaze whom have
i for a protector what will become of me now 

i will be your protector my dearest love but indeed you are
uncharitably severe upon poor mrs sinclair indeed you are she is a
gentlewoman born and the relict of a man of honour and though left in
such circumstance as to oblige her to let lodgings yet would she scorn
to be guilty of a wilful baseness 

i hope so it may be so i may be mistaken but but there is no crime i
presume no treason to say i don't like her house 

the old dragon straddled up to her with her arms kemboed again her
eye-brows erect like the bristles upon a hog's back and scouling over
her shortened nose more than half-hid her ferret eyes her mouth was
distorted she pouted out her blubber-lips as if to bellows up wind and
sputter into her horse-nostrils and her chin was curdled and more than
usually prominent with passion 

with two hoh-madams she accosted the frighted fair-one who terrified 
caught hold of my sleeve 

i feared she would fall into fits and with a look of indignation told
mrs sinclair that these apartments were mine and i could not imagine
what she meant either by listening to what passed between me and my
spouse or to come in uninvited and still more i wondered at her giving
herself these strange liberties 

i may be to blame jack for suffering this wretch to give herself these
airs but her coming in was without my orders 

the old beldam throwing herself into a chair fell a blubbering and
exclaiming and the pacifying of her and endeavouring to reconcile the
lady to her took up till near one o'clock 

and thus between terror and the late hour and what followed she was
diverted from the thoughts of getting out of the house to mrs leeson's 
or any where else 



letter xii


mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday morning june 13 


and now belford i can go no farther the affair is over clarissa
lives and i am

your humble servant 
r lovelace 


 the whole of this black transaction is given by the injured lady to miss
howe in her subsequent letters dated thursday july 6 see letters
lxvii lxviii lxix  



letter xiii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
watford wedn jan 14 


o thou savage-hearted monster what work hast thou made in one guilty
hour for a whole age of repentance 

i am inexpressibly concerned at the fate of this matchless lady she
could not have fallen into the hands of any other man breathing and
suffered as she has done with thee 

i had written a great part of another long letter to try to soften thy
flinty heart in her favour for i thought it but too likely that thou
shouldst succeed in getting her back again to the accursed woman's but
i find it would have been too late had i finished it and sent it away 
yet cannot i forbear writing to urge thee to make the only amends thou
now canst make her by a proper use of the license thou hast obtained 

poor poor lady it is a pain to me that i ever saw her such an adorer
of virtue to be sacrificed to the vilest of her sex and thou their
implement in the devil's hand for a purpose so base so ungenerous so
inhumane pride thyself o cruellest of men in this reflection and
that thy triumph over a woman who for thy sake was abandoned of every
friend she had in the world was effected not by advantages taken of her
weakness and credulity but by the blackest artifice after a long course
of studied deceits had been tried to no purpose 

i can tell thee it is well either for thee or for me that i am not the
brother of the lady had i been her brother her violation must have
been followed by the blood of one of us 

excuse me lovelace and let not the lady fare the worse for my concern
for her and yet i have but one other motive to ask thy excuse and that
is because i owe to thy own communicative pen the knowledge i have of
thy barbarous villany since thou mightest if thou wouldst have passed
it upon me for a common seduction 

clarissa lives thou sayest that she does is my wonder and these words
show that thou thyself though thou couldst nevertheless proceed 
hardly expectedst she would have survived the outrage what must have
been the poor lady's distress watchful as she had been over her honour 
when dreadful certainty took place of cruel apprehension and yet a man
may guess what must have been by that which thou paintest when she
suspected herself tricked deserted and betrayed by the pretended
ladies 

that thou couldst behold her phrensy on this occasion and her
half-speechless half-fainting prostration at thy feet and yet retain thy
evil purposes will hardly be thought credible even by those who know
thee if they have seen her 

poor poor lady with such noble qualities as would have adorned the
most exalted married life to fall into the hands of the only man in the
world who could have treated her as thou hast treated her and to let
loose the old dragon as thou properly callest her upon the
before-affrighted innocent what a barbarity was that what a poor piece
of barbarity in order to obtain by terror what thou dispairedst to gain
by love though supported by stratagems the most insidious 

o lovelace lovelace had i doubted it before i should now be
convinced that there must be a world after this to do justice to
injured merit and to punish barbarous perfidy could the divine
socrates and the divine clarissa otherwise have suffered 

but let me if possible for one moment try to forget this villanous
outrage on the most excellent of women 

i have business here which will hold me yet a few days and then perhaps
i shall quit this house for ever 

i have had a solemn and tedious time of it i should never have known
that i had half the respect i really find i had for the old gentleman 
had i not so closely at his earnest desire attended him and been a
witness of the tortures he underwent 

this melancholy occasion may possibly have contributed to humanize me 
but surely i never could have been so remorseless a caitiff as thou hast
been to a woman of half this lady's excellence 

but pr'ythee dear lovelace if thou'rt a man and not a devil resolve 
out of hand to repair thy sin of ingratitude by conferring upon thyself
the highest honour thou canst receive in making her lawfully thine 

but if thou canst not prevail upon thyself to do her this justice i
think i should not scruple a tilt with thee  an everlasting rupture at
least must follow  if thou sacrificest her to the accursed women 

thou art desirous to know what advantage i reap by my uncle's demise i
do not certainly know for i have not been so greedily solicitous on this
subject as some of the kindred have been who ought to have shown more
decency as i have told them and suffered the corpse to have been cold
before they had begun their hungry inquiries but by what i gathered
from the poor man's talk to me who oftener than i wished touched upon
the subject i deem it will be upwards of 5000  in cash and in the
funds after all legacies paid besides the real estate which is a clear
1000  a-year 

i wish from my heart thou wert a money-lover were the estate to be of
double the value thou shouldst have it every shilling only upon one
condition  for my circumstances before were as easy as i wish them to be
while i am single  that thou wouldst permit me the honour of being this
fatherless lady's father as it is called at the altar 

think of this my dear lovelace be honest and let me present thee with
the brightest jewel that man ever possessed and then body and soul 
wilt thou bind to thee for ever thy

belford 



letter xiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
thursday june 15 


let me alone you great dog you let me alone have i heard a lesser
boy his coward arms held over his head and face say to a bigger who
was pommeling him for having run away with his apple his orange or his
ginger-bread 

so say i to thee on occasion of thy severity to thy poor friend who as
thou ownest has furnished thee ungenerous as thou art with the
weapons thou brandishest so fearfully against him and to what purpose 
when the mischief is done when of consequence the affair is
irretrievable and when a clarissa could not move me 

well but after all i must own that there is something very singular
in this lady's case and at times i cannot help regretting that ever i
attempted her since not one power either of body or soul could be moved
in my favour and since to use the expression of the philosopher on a
much graver occasion there is no difference to be found between the
skull of king philip and that of another man 

but people's extravagant notions of things alter not facts belford and 
when all's done miss clarissa harlowe has but run the fate of a thousand
others of her sex only that they did not set such a romantic value upon
what they call their honour that's all 

and yet i will allow thee this that if a person sets a high value upon
any thing be it ever such a trifle in itself or in the eye of others 
the robbing of that person of it is not a trifle to him take the matter
in this light i own i have done wrong great wrong to this admirable
creature 

but have i not known twenty and twenty of the sex who have seemed to
carry their notions of virtue high yet when brought to the test have
abated of their severity and how should we be convinced that any of
them are proof till they are tried 

a thousand times have i said that i never yet met with such a woman as
this if i had i hardly ever should have attempted miss clarissa
harlowe hitherto she is all angel and was not that the point which at
setting out i proposed to try and was not cohabitation ever my darling
view and am i not now at last in the high road to it it is true 
that i have nothing to boast of as to her will the very contrary but
now are we come to the test whether she cannot be brought to make the
best of an irreparable evil if she exclaim  she has reason to exclaim 
and i will sit down with patience by the hour together to hear her
exclamations till she is tired of them   she will then descend to
expostulation perhaps expostulation will give me hope expostulation
will show that she hates me not and if she hate me not she will
forgive and if she now forgive then will all be over and she will be
mine upon my own terms and it shall then be the whole study of my future
life to make her happy 


 see vol iii letter xviii 


so belford thou seest that i have journeyed on to this stage  indeed 
through infinite mazes and as infinite remorses  with one determined
point in view from the first to thy urgent supplication then that i
will do her grateful justice by marriage let me answer in matt prior's
two lines on his hoped-for auditorship as put into the mouths of his st 
john and harley 

 let that be done which matt doth say 
 yea quoth the earl but not to-day 

thou seest jack that i make no resolutions however against doing her 
one time or other the wished-for justice even were i to succeed in my
principal view cohabitation and of this i do assure thee that if i
ever marry it must it shall be miss clarissa harlowe nor is her
honour at all impaired with me by what she has so far suffered but the
contrary she must only take care that if she be at last brought to
forgive me she show me that her lovelace is the only man on earth whom
she could have forgiven on the like occasion 

but ah jack what in the mean time shall i do with this admirable
creature at present  i am loth to say it but at present  she is
quite stupified 

i had rather methinks she should have retained all her active powers 
though i had suffered by her nails and her teeth than that she should be
sunk into such a state of absolute insensibility shall i call it as
she has been in every since tuesday morning yet as she begins a little
to revive and now-and-then to call names and to exclaim i dread almost
to engage with the anguish of a spirit that owes its extraordinary
agitations to a niceness that has no example either in ancient or modern
story for after all what is there in her case that should stupify
such a glowing such a blooming charmer excess of grief excess of
terror have made a person's hair stand on end and even as we have
read changed the colour of it but that it should so stupify as to
make a person at times insensible to those imaginary wrongs which
would raise others from stupifaction is very surprising 

but i will leave this subject least it should make me too grave 

i was yesterday at hampstead and discharged all obligations there with
no small applause i told them that the lady was now as happy as myself 
and that is no great untruth for i am not altogether so when i allow
myself to think 

mrs townsend with her tars had not been then there i told them what
i would have them say to her if she came 

well but after all  how many after-all's have i   i could be very
grave were i to give way to it the devil take me for a fool what's
the matte with me i wonder i must breathe a fresher air for a few
days 

but what shall i do with this admirable creature the while hang me if
i know for if i stir the venomous spider of this habitation will want
to set upon the charming fly whose silken wings are already so entangled
in my enormous web that she cannot move hand or foot for so much has
grief stupified her that she is at present destitute of will as she
always seemed to be of desire i must not therefore think of leaving her
yet for two days together 



letter xv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


i have just now had a specimen of what the resentment of this dear
creature will be when quite recovered an affecting one for entering
her apartment after dorcas and endeavouring to soothe and pacify her
disordered mind in the midst of my blandishments she held up to heaven 
in a speechless agony the innocent license which she has in her own
power as the poor distressed catalans held up their english treaty 
on an occasion that keeps the worst of my actions in countenance 

she seemed about to call down vengeance upon me when happily the leaden
god in pity to her trembling lovelace waved over her half-drowned eyes
his somniferous want and laid asleep the fair exclaimer before she
could go half through with her intended imprecation 

thou wilt guess by what i have written that some little art has been
made use of but it was with a generous design if thou'lt allow me the
word on such an occasion in order to lessen the too-quick sense she was
likely to have of what she was to suffer a contrivance i never had
occasion for before and had not thought of now if mrs sinclair had not
proposed it to me to whom i left the management of it and i have done
nothing but curse her ever since lest the quantity should have for ever
dampened her charming intellects 

hence my concern for i think the poor lady ought not to have been so
treated poor lady did i say what have i to do with thy creeping
style but have not i the worst of it since her insensibility has made
me but a thief to my own joys 

i did not intend to tell thee of this little innocent trick for such i
designed it to be but that i hate disingenuousness to thee especially 
and as i cannot help writing in a more serious vein than usual thou
wouldst perhaps had i not hinted the true cause have imagined that i
was sorry for the fact itself and this would have given thee a good deal
of trouble in scribbling dull persuasives to repair by matrimony and me
in reading thy cruel nonsense besides one day or other thou mightest 
had i not confessed it have heard of it in an aggravated manner and i
know thou hast such an high opinion of this lady's virtue that thou
wouldst be disappointed if thou hadst reason to think that she was
subdued by her own consent or any the least yielding in her will and
so is she beholden to me in some measure that at the expense of my
honour she may so justly form a plea which will entirely salve her's 

and now is the whole secret out 

thou wilt say i am a horrid fellow as the lady does that i am the
unchained beelzebub and a plotting villain and as this is what you both
said beforehand and nothing worse can be said i desire if thou wouldst
not have me quite serious with thee and that i should think thou meanest
more by thy tilting hint than i am willing to believe thou dost that
thou wilt forbear thy invectives for is not the thing done can it be
helped and must i not now try to make the best of it and the rather
do i enjoin to make thee this and inviolable secrecy because i begin
to think that my punishment will be greater than the fault were it to be
only from my own reflection 



letter xvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
friday june 16 


i am sorry to hear of thy misfortune but hope thou wilt not long lie by
it thy servant tells me what narrow escape thou hadst with thy neck i
wish it may not be ominous but i think thou seemest not to be in so
enterprising a way as formerly and yet merry or sad thou seest a
rake's neck is always in danger if not from the hangman from his own
horse but tis a vicious toad it seems and i think thou shouldst
never venture upon his back again for tis a plaguy thing for rider and
horse both to be vicious 

the fellow tells me thou desirest me to continue to write to thee in
order to divert thy chagrin on thy forced confinement but how can i
think it in my power to divert when my subject is not pleasing to
myself 

caesar never knew what it was to be hipped i will call it till he
came to be what pompey was that is to say till he arrived at the
height of his ambition nor did thy lovelace know what it was to be
gloomy till he had completed his wishes upon the most charming
creature in the world 

and yet why say i completed when the will the consent is
wanting and i have still views before me of obtaining that 

yet i could almost join with thee in the wish which thou sendest me up
by thy servant unfriendly as it is that i had had thy misfortune
before monday night last for here the poor lady has run into a
contrary extreme to that i told thee of in my last for now is she as
much too lively as before she was too stupid and bating that she has
pretty frequent lucid intervals would be deemed raving mad and i
should be obliged to confine her 

i am most confoundedly disturbed about it for i begin to fear that her
intellects are irreparably hurt 

who the devil could have expected such strange effects from a cause so
common and so slight 

but these high-souled and high-sensed girls who had set up for shining
lights and examples to the rest of the sex are with such difficulty
brought down to the common standard that a wise man who prefers his
peace of mind to his glory in subduing one of that exalted class 
would have nothing to say to them 

i do all in my power to quiet her spirits when i force myself into her
presence 

i go on begging pardon one minute and vowing truth and honour another 

i would at first have persuaded her and offered to call witnesses to
the truth of it that we were actually married though the license was
in her hands i thought the assertion might go down in her disorder 
and charming consequences i hoped would follow but this would not
do 

i therefore gave up that hope and now i declare to her that it is my
resolution to marry her the moment her uncle harlowe informs me that
he will grace the ceremony with his presence 

but she believes nothing i say nor whether in her senses or not 
bears me with patience in her sight 

i pity her with all my soul and i curse myself when she is in her
wailing fits and when i apprehend that intellects so charming are
for ever damped 

but more i curse these women who put me upon such an expedient lord 
lord what a hand have i made of it and all for what 

last night for the first time since monday night she got to her pen
and ink but she pursues her writing with such eagerness and hurry as
show too evidently her discomposure 

i hope however that this employment will help to calm her spirits 


 


just now dorcas tells me that what she writes she tears and throws
the paper in fragments under the table either as not knowing what she
does or disliking it then gets up wrings her hands weeps and
shifts her seat all round the room then returns to her table sits
down and writes again 


 


one odd letter as i may call it dorcas has this moment given me from
her carry this said she to the vilest of men dorcas a toad 
brought it without any further direction to me i sat down intending
 though tis pretty long to give thee a copy of it but for my life 
i cannot tis so extravagant and the original is too much an
original to let it go out of my hands 

but some of the scraps and fragments as either torn through or flung
aside i will copy for the novelty of the thing and to show thee how
her mind works now she is in the whimsical way yet i know i am still
furnishing thee with new weapons against myself but spare thy comments 
my own reflections render them needless dorcas thinks her lady will
ask for them so wishes to have them to lay again under the table 

by the first thou'lt guess that i have told her that miss howe is very
ill and can't write that she may account the better for not having
received the letter designed for her 


paper i
 torn in two pieces 


my dearest miss howe 

o what dreadful dreadful things have i to tell you but yet i cannot
tell you neither but say are you really ill as a vile vile
creature informs me you are 

but he never yet told me truth and i hope has not in this and yet if
it were not true surely i should have heard from you before now but
what have i to do to upbraid you may well be tired of me and if you
are i can forgive you for i am tired of myself and all my own
relations were tired of me long before you were 

how good you have always been to me mine own dear anna howe but how
i ramble 

i sat down to say a great deal my heart was full i did not know what
to say first and thought and grief and confusion and o my poor
head i cannot tell what and thought and grief and confusion came
crowding so thick upon me one would be first another would be first 
all would be first so i can write nothing at all only that whatever
they have done to me i cannot tell but i am no longer what i was-in
any one thing did i say yes but i am for i am still and i ever
will be 

your true 


plague on it i can write no more of this eloquent nonsense myself 
which rather shows a raised than a quenched imagination but dorcas
shall transcribe the others in separate papers as written by the
whimsical charmer and some time hence when all is over and i can
better bear to read them i may ask thee for a sight of them preserve
them therefore for we often look back with pleasure even upon the
heaviest griefs when the cause of them is removed 


paper ii
 scratch'd through and thrown under the table 


 and can you my dear honoured papa resolve for ever to reprobate
your poor child but i am sure you would not if you knew what she has
suffered since her unhappy and will nobody plead for your poor suffering
girl no one good body why then dearest sir let it be an act of your
own innate goodness which i have so much experienced and so much
abused i don't presume to think you should receive me no indeed my
name is i don't know what my name is i never dare to wish to come into
your family again but your heavy curse my papa yes i will call you
papa and help yourself as you can for you are my own dear papa whether
you will or not and though i am an unworthy child yet i am your child 


paper iii


a lady took a great fancy to a young lion or a bear i forget
which but a bear or a tiger i believe it was it was made her a
present of when a whelp she fed it with her own hand she nursed up
the wicked cub with great tenderness and would play with it without
fear or apprehension of danger and it was obedient to all her commands 
and its tameness as she used to boast increased with its growth so
that like a lap-dog it would follow her all over the house but mind
what followed at last some how neglecting to satisfy its hungry maw 
or having otherwise disobliged it on some occasion it resumed its
nature and on a sudden fell upon her and tore her in pieces and who
was most to blame i pray the brute or the lady the lady surely 
for what she did was out of nature out of character at least what it
did was in its own nature 


paper iv


how art thou now humbled in the dust thou proud clarissa harlowe 
thou that never steppedst out of thy father's house but to be admired 
who wert wont to turn thine eye sparkling with healthful life and
self-assurance to different objects at once as thou passedst as if
 for so thy penetrating sister used to say to plume thyself upon the
expected applauses of all that beheld thee thou that usedst to go to
rest satisfied with the adulations paid thee in the past day and couldst
put off every thing but thy vanity 


paper v


rejoice not now my bella my sister my friend but pity the humbled
creature whose foolish heart you used to say you beheld through the thin
veil of humility which covered it 

it must have been so my fall had not else been permitted 

you penetrated my proud heart with the jealousy of an elder sister's
searching eye 

you knew me better than i knew myself 

hence your upbraidings and your chidings when i began to totter 

but forgive now those vain triumphs of my heart 

i thought poor proud wretch that i was that what you said was owing to
your envy 

i thought i could acquit my intention of any such vanity 

i was too secure in the knowledge i thought i had of my own heart 

my supposed advantages became a snare to me 

and what now is the end of all 


paper vi


what now is become of the prospects of a happy life which once i thought
opening before me who now shall assist in the solemn preparations who
now shall provide the nuptial ornaments which soften and divert the
apprehensions of the fearful virgin no court now to be paid to my
smiles no encouraging compliments to inspire thee with hope of laying a
mind not unworthy of thee under obligation no elevation now for
conscious merit and applauded purity to look down from on a prostrate
adorer and an admiring world and up to pleased and rejoicing parents
and relations 


paper vii


thou pernicious caterpillar that preyest upon the fair leaf of virgin
fame and poisonest those leaves which thou canst not devour 

thou fell blight thou eastern blast thou overspreading mildew that
destroyest the early promises of the shining year that mockest the
laborious toil and blastest the joyful hopes of the painful husbandman 

thou fretting moth that corruptest the fairest garment 

thou eating canker-worm that preyest upon the opening bud and turnest
the damask-rose into livid yellowness 

if as religion teaches us god will judge us in a great measure by our
benevolent or evil actions to one another o wretch bethink thee in
time bethink thee how great must be thy condemnation 


paper viiii


at first i saw something in your air and person that displeased me
not your birth and fortunes were no small advantages to you you
acted not ignobly by my passionate brother every body said you were
brave every body said you were generous a brave man i thought could
not be a base man a generous man could not i believed be ungenerous 
where he acknowledged obligation thus prepossessed all the rest that
my soul loved and wished for in your reformation i hoped i knew not 
but by report any flagrant instances of your vileness you seemed
frank as well as generous frankness and generosity ever attracted me 
whoever kept up those appearances i judged of their hearts by my own 
and whatever qualities i wished to find in them i was ready to find 
and when found i believed them to be natives of the soil 

my fortunes my rank my character i thought a further security i
was in none of those respects unworthy of being the niece of lord m 
and of his two noble sisters your vows your imprecations but oh 
you have barbarously and basely conspired against that honour which
you ought to have protected and now you have made me what is it of
vile that you have not made me 

yet god knows my heart i had no culpable inclinations i honoured
virtue i hated vice but i knew not that you were vice itself 


paper ix


had the happiness of any of the poorest outcast in the world whom i
had neveer seen never known never before heard of lain as much in my
power as my happiness did in your's my benevolent heart would have
made me fly to the succour of such a poor distressed with what pleasure
would i have raised the dejected head and comforted the desponding
heart but who now shall pity the poor wretch who has increased 
instead of diminished the number of the miserable 


paper x


lead me where my own thoughts themselves may lose me 
where i may dose out what i've left of life 
forget myself and that day's guile 
cruel remembrance how shall i appease thee 

 death only can be dreadful to the bad 
to innocence tis like a bugbear dress'd
to frighten children pull but off the mask 
and he'll appear a friend  


 transcriber's note portions set off in square brackets     are written
at angles to the majority of the text as if squeezed into margins 


 oh you have done an act
that blots the face and blush of modesty 
 takes off the rose
 from the fair forehead of an innocent love 
and makes a blister there 

 then down i laid my head 
down on cold earth and for a while was dead 
and my freed soul to a strange somewhere fled 
 ah sottish soul said i 
when back to its cage again i saw it fly 
 fool to resume her broken chain 
and row the galley here again 
 fool to that body to return 
where it condemn'd and destin'd is to mourn 

 i could a tale unfold 
 would harrow up thy soul  

o my miss howe if thou hast friendship help me 
and speak the words of peace to my divided soul 
 that wars within me 
and raises ev'ry sense to my confusion 
 i'm tott'ring on the brink
of peace an thou art all the hold i've left 
assist me in the pangs of my affliction 

when honour's lost tis a relief to die 
death's but a sure retreat from infamy 

 by swift misfortunes
 how i am pursu'd 
which on each other
 are like waves renew'd  

the farewell youth 
 and all the joys that dwell
with youth and life 
 and life itself farewell 

for life can never be sincerely blest 
heav'n punishes the bad and proves the best 


 


after all belford i have just skimmed over these transcriptions of
dorcas and i see there are method and good sense in some of them wild
as others of them are and that her memory which serves her so well
for these poetical flights is far from being impaired and this gives
me hope that she will soon recover her charming intellects though i
shall be the sufferer by their restoration i make no doubt 

but in the letter she wrote to me there are yet greater extravagancies 
and though i said it was too affecting to give thee a copy of it yet 
after i have let thee see the loose papers enclosed i think i may throw
in a transcript of that dorcas therefore shall here transcribe it i
cannot the reading of it affected me ten times more than the severest
reproaches of a regular mind could do 


to mr lovelace

i never intended to write another line to you i would not see you if i
could help it o that i never had 

but tell me of a truth is miss howe really and truly ill very ill -
and is not her illness poison and don't you know who gave it to her 

what you or mrs sinclair or somebody i cannot tell who have done to
my poor head you best know but i shall never be what i was my head is
gone i have wept away all my brain i believe for i can weep no more 
indeed i have had my full share so it is no matter 

but good now lovelace don't set mrs sinclair upon me again i never
did her any harm she so affrights me when i see her ever since when
was it i cannot tell you can i suppose she may be a good woman as
far as i know she was the wife of a man of honour very likely though
forced to let lodgings for a livelihood poor gentlewoman let her know
i pity her but don't let her come near me again pray don't 

yet she may be a very good woman 

what would i say i forget what i was going to say 

o lovelace you are satan himself or he helps you out in every thing 
and that's as bad 

but have you really and truly sold yourself to him and for how long 
what duration is your reign to have 

poor man the contract will be out and then what will be your fate 

o lovelace if you could be sorry for yourself i would be sorry too but
when all my doors are fast and nothing but the key-hole open and the
key of late put into that to be where you are in a manner without
opening any of them o wretched wretched clarissa harlowe 

for i never will be lovelace let my uncle take it as he pleases 

well but now i remember what i was going to say it is for your good 
not mine for nothing can do me good now o thou villanous man thou
hated lovelace 

but mrs sinclair may be a good woman if you love me but that you don't
 but don't let her bluster up with her worse than mannish airs to me
again o she is a frightful woman if she be a woman she needed not
to put on that fearful mask to scare me out of my poor wits but don't
tell her what i say i have no hatred to her it is only fright and
foolish fear that's all she may not be a bad woman but neither are
all men any more than all women alike god forbid they should be like
you 

alas you have killed my head among you i don't say who did it god
forgive you all but had it not been better to have put me out of all
your ways at once you might safely have done it for nobody would
require me at your hands no not a soul except indeed miss howe would
have said when she should see you what lovelace have you done with
clarissa harlowe and then you could have given any slight gay answer 
sent her beyond sea or she has run away from me as she did from her
parents and this would have been easily credited for you know 
lovelace she that could run away from them might very well run away
from you 

but this is nothing to what i wanted to say now i have it 

i have lost it again this foolish wench comes teasing me for what
purpose should i eat for what end should i wish to live i tell thee 
dorcas i will neither eat nor drink i cannot be worse than i am 

i will do as you'd have me good dorcas look not upon me so fiercely 
but thou canst not look so bad as i have seen somebody look 

mr lovelace now that i remember what i took pen in hand to say let me
hurry off my thoughts lest i lose them again here i am sensible and
yet i am hardly sensible neither but i know my head is not as it should
be for all that therefore let me propose one thing to you it is for
your good not mine and this is it 

i must needs be both a trouble and an expense to you and here my uncle
harlowe when he knows how i am will never wish any man to have me no 
not even you who have been the occasion of it barbarous and ungrateful 
 a less complicated villany cost a tarquin but i forget what i would
say again 

then this is it i never shall be myself again i have been a very wicked
creature a vain proud poor creature full of secret pride which i
carried off under an humble guise and deceived every body my sister
says so and now i am punished so let me be carried out of this house 
and out of your sight and let me be put into that bedlam privately 
which once i saw but it was a sad sight to me then little as i thought
what i should come to myself that is all i would say this is all i
have to wish for then i shall be out of all your ways and i shall be
taken care of and bread and water without your tormentings will be
dainties and my straw-bed the easiest i have lain in for i cannot tell
how long 

my clothes will sell for what will keep me there perhaps as long as i
shall live but lovelace dear lovelace i will call you for you have
cost me enough i'm sure don't let me be made a show of for my
family's sake nay for your own sake don't do that for when i know all
i have suffered which yet i do not and no matter if i never do i may
be apt to rave against you by name and tell of all your baseness to a
poor humbled creature that once was as proud as any body but of what i
can't tell except of my own folly and vanity but let that pass since
i am punished enough for it 

so suppose instead of bedlam it were a private mad-house where nobody
comes that will be better a great deal 

but another thing lovelace don't let them use me cruelly when i am
there you have used me cruelly enough you know don't let them use me
cruelly for i will be very tractable and do as any body would have me
to do except what you would have me do for that i never will another
thing lovelace don't let this good woman i was going to say vile
woman but don't tell her that because she won't let you send me to this
happy refuge perhaps if she were to know it 

another thing lovelace and let me have pen and ink and paper allowed
me it will be all my amusement but they need not send to any body i
shall write to what i write because it will but trouble them and
somebody may do you a mischief may be i wish not that any body do any
body a mischief upon my account 

you tell me that lady betty lawrance and your cousin montague were
here to take leave of me but that i was asleep and could not be waked 
so you told me at first i was married you know and that you were my
husband ah lovelace look to what you say but let not them for they
will sport with my misery let not that lady betty let not that miss
montague whatever the real ones may do nor mrs sinclair neither nor
any of her lodgers nor her nieces come to see me in my place real
ones i say for lovelace i shall find out all your villanies in time 
indeed i shall so put me there as soon as you can it is for your good 
then all will pass for ravings that i can say as i doubt no many poor
creatures' exclamations do pass though there may be too much truth in
them for all that and you know i began to be mad at hampstead so you
said ah villanous man what have you not to answer for 


 


a little interval seems to be lent me i had begun to look over what i
have written it is not fit for any one to see so far as i have been
able to re-peruse it but my head will not hold i doubt to go through
it all if therefore i have not already mentioned my earnest desire let
me tell you it is this that i be sent out of this abominable house
without delay and locked up in some private mad-house about this town 
for such it seems there are never more to be seen or to be produced
to any body except in your own vindication if you should be charged
with the murder of my person a much lighter crime than that of
honour which the greatest villain on earth has robbed me of and deny
me not this my last request i beseech you and one other and that is 
never to let me see you more this surely may be granted to

the miserably abused
clarissa harlowe 


 


i will not bear thy heavy preachments belford upon this affecting
letter so not a word of that sort the paper thou'lt see is
blistered with the tears even of the hardened transcriber which has
made her ink run here and there 

mrs sinclair is a true heroine and i think shames us all and she is
a woman too thou'lt say the beset things corrupted become the worst 
but this is certain that whatever the sex set their hearts upon they
make thorough work of it and hence it is that a mischief which would
end in simple robbery among men rogues becomes murder if a woman be in
it 

i know thou wilt blame me for having had recourse to art but do not
physicians prescribe opiates in acute cases where the violence of the
disorder would be apt to throw the patient into a fever or delirium i
aver that my motive for this expedient was mercy nor could it be any
thing else for a rape thou knowest to us rakes is far from being an
undesirable thing nothing but the law stands in our way upon that
account and the opinion of what a modest woman will suffer rather than
become a viva voce accuser lessens much an honest fellow's apprehensions
on that score then if these somnivolencies  i hate the word opiates on
this occasion   have turned her head that is an effect they frequently
have upon some constitutions and in this case was rather the fault of
the dose than the design of the giver 

but is not wine itself an opiate in degree how many women have been
taken advantage of by wine and other still more intoxicating viands 
let me tell thee jack that the experience of many of the passive sex 
and the consciences of many more of the active appealed to will testify
that thy lovelace is not the worst of villains nor would i have thee
put me upon clearing myself by comparisons 

if she escape a settled delirium when my plots unravel i think it is all
i ought to be concerned about what therefore i desire of thee is 
that if two constructions may be made of my actions thou wilt afford me
the most favourable for this not only friendship but my own
ingenuousness which has furnished thee with the knowledge of the facts
against which thou art so ready to inveigh require of thee 


 


will is just returned from an errand to hampstead and acquaints me 
that mrs townsend was yesterday at mrs moore's accompanied by three or
four rough fellows a greater number as supposed at a distance she
was strangely surprised at the news that my spouse and i are entirely
reconciled and that two fine ladies my relations came to visit her 
and went to town with her where she is very happy with me she was sure
we were not married she said unless it was while we were at hampstead 
and they were sure the ceremony was not performed there but that the
lady is happy and easy is unquestionable and a fling was thrown out by
mrs moore and mrs bevis at mischief-makers as they knew mrs townsend
to be acquainted with miss howe 

now since my fair-one can neither receive nor send away letters i am
pretty easy as to this mrs townsend and her employer and i fancy miss
howe will be puzzled to know what to think of the matter and afraid of
sending by wilson's conveyance and perhaps suppose that her friend
slights her or has changed her mind in my favour and is ashamed to own
it as she has not had an answer to what she wrote and will believe that
the rustic delivered her last letter into her own hand 

mean time i have a little project come into my head of a new kind just
for amusement-sake that's all variety has irresistible charms i
cannot live without intrigue my charmer has no passions that is to
say none of the passions that i want her to have she engages all my
reverence i am at present more inclined to regret what i have done 
than to proceed to new offences and shall regret it till i see how she
takes it when recovered 

shall i tell thee my project tis not a high one tis this to get
hither to mrs moore miss rawlins and my widow bevis for they are
desirous to make a visit to my spouse now we are so happy together 
and if i can order it right belton mowbray tourville and i will
show them a little more of the ways of this wicked town than they at
present know why should they be acquainted with a man of my character 
and not be the better and wiser for it i would have every body rail
against rakes with judgment and knowledge if they will rail two of
these women gave me a great deal of trouble and the third i am
confident will forgive a merry evening 

thou wilt be curious to know what the persons of these women are to whom
i intend so much distinction i think i have not heretofore mentioned
any thing characteristic of their persons 

mrs moore is a widow of about thirty-eight a little mortified by
misfortunes but those are often the merriest folks when warmed she
has good features still and is what they call much of a gentlewoman and
very neat in her person and dress she has given over i believe all
thoughts of our sex but when the dying embers are raked up about the
half-consumed stump there will be fuel enough left i dare say to blaze
out and give a comfortable warmth to a half-starved by-stander 

mrs bevis is comely that is to say plump a lover of mirth and one
whom no grief ever dwelt with i dare say for a week together about
twenty-five years of age mowbray will have very little difficulty with
her i believe for one cannot do every thing one's self and yet
sometimes women of this free cast when it comes to the point answer not
the promises their cheerful forwardness gives a man who has a view upon
them 

miss rawlins is an agreeable young lady enough but not beautiful she
has sense and would be thought to know the world as it is called but 
for her knowledge is more indebted to theory than experience a mere
whipt-syllabub knowledge this jack that always fails the person who
trusts to it when it should hold to do her service for such young
ladies have so much dependence upon their own understanding and wariness 
are so much above the cautions that the less opinionative may be
benefited by that their presumption is generally their overthrow when
attempted by a man of experience who knows how to flatter their vanity 
and to magnify their wisdom in order to take advantage of their folly 
but for miss rawlins if i can add experience to her theory what an
accomplished person will she be and how much will she be obliged to me 
and not only she but all those who may be the better for the precepts
she thinks herself already so well qualified to give dearly jack do
i love to engage with these precept-givers and example-setters 

now belford although there is nothing striking in any of these
characters yet may we at a pinch make a good frolicky half-day with
them if after we have softened their wax at table by encouraging
viands we can set our women and them into dancing dancing which all
women love and all men should therefore promote for both their sakes 

and thus when tourville sings belton fiddles mowbray makes rough love 
and i smooth and thou jack wilt be by that time well enough to join in
the chorus the devil's in't if we don't mould them into what shape we
please our own women by their laughing freedoms encouraging them to
break through all their customary reserves for women to women thou
knowest are great darers and incentives not one of them loving to be
outdone or outdared when their hearts are thoroughly warmed 

i know at first the difficulty will be the accidental absence of my
dear mrs lovelace to whom principally they will design their visit but
if we can exhilarate them they won't then wish to see her and i can
form twenty accidents and excuses from one hour to another for her
absence till each shall have a subject to take up all her thoughts 

i am really sick at heart for a frolic and have no doubt but this will
be an agreeable one these women already think me a wild fellow nor do
they like me the less for it as i can perceive and i shall take care 
that they shall be treated with so much freedom before one another's
faces that in policy they shall keep each other's counsel and won't
this be doing a kind thing by them since it will knit an indissoluble
band of union and friendship between three women who are neighbours and
at present have only common obligations to one another for thou wantest
not to be told that secrets of love and secrets of this nature are
generally the strongest cement of female friendships 

but after all if my beloved should be happily restored to her
intellects we may have scenes arise between us that will be sufficiently
busy to employ all the faculties of thy friend without looking out for
new occasions already as i have often observed has she been the means
of saving scores of her sex yet without her own knowledge 


saturday night 

by dorcas's account of her lady's behaviour the dear creature seems to
be recovering i shall give the earliest notice of this to the worthy
capt tomlinson that he may apprize uncle john of it i must be
properly enabled from that quarter to pacify her or at least to
rebate her first violence 



letter xvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday afternoon six o'clock june 18 


i went out early this morning and returned not till just now when i was
informed that my beloved in my absence had taken it into her head to
attempt to get away 

she tripped down with a parcel tied up in a handkerchief her hood on 
and was actually in the entry when mrs sinclair saw her 

pray madam whipping between her and the street-door be pleased to let
me know where you are going 

who has a right to controul me was the word 

i have madam by order of your spouse and kemboing her arms as she
owned i desire you will be pleased to walk up again 

she would have spoken but could not and bursting into tears turned
back and went up to her chamber and dorcas was taken to task for
suffering her to be in the passage before she was seen 

this shows as we hoped last night that she is recovering her charming
intellects 

dorcas says she was visible to her but once before the whole day and
then she seemed very solemn and sedate 

i will endeavour to see her it must be in her own chamber i suppose 
for she will hardly meet me in the dining-room what advantage will the
confidence of our sex give me over the modesty of her's if she be
recovered i the most confident of men she the most delicate of
women sweet soul methinks i have her before me her face averted 
speech lost in sighs abashed conscious what a triumphant aspect will
this give me when i gaze on her downcast countenance 


 


this moment dorcas tells me she believes she is coming to find me out 
she asked her after me and dorcas left her drying her red-swoln eyes at
her glass  no design of moving me by tears   sighing too sensibly for my
courage but to what purpose have i gone thus far if i pursue not my
principal end niceness must be a little abated she knows the worst 
that she cannot fly me that she must see me and that i can look her
into a sweet confusion are circumstances greatly in my favour what can
she do but rave and exclaim i am used to raving and exclaiming but if
recovered i shall see how she behaves upon this our first sensible
interview after what she has suffered 

here she comes 



letter xviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday night 


never blame me for giving way to have art used with this admirable
creature all the princes of the air or beneath it joining with me 
could never have subdued her while she had her senses 

i will not anticipate only to tell thee that i am too much awakened by
her to think of sleep were i to go to bed and so shall have nothing to
do but to write an account of our odd conversation while it is so strong
upon my mind that i can think of nothing else 

she was dressed in a white damask night-gown with less negligence than
for some days past i was sitting with my pen in my fingers and stood
up when i first saw her with great complaisance as if the day were
still her own and so indeed it is 

she entered with such dignity in her manner as struck me with great awe 
and prepared me for the poor figure i made in the subsequent
conversation a poor figure indeed but i will do her justice 

she came up with quick steps pretty close to me a white handkerchief
in her hand her eyes neither fierce nor mild but very earnest and a
fixed sedateness in her whole aspect which seemed to be the effect of
deep contemplation and thus she accosted me with an air and action that
i never saw equalled 

you see before you sir the wretch whose preference of you to all your
sex you have rewarded as it indeed deserved to be rewarded my father's
dreadful curse has already operated upon me in the very letter of it as
to this life and it seems to me too evident that it will not be your
fault that it is not entirely completed in the loss of my soul as well
as of my honour which you villanous man have robbed me of with a
baseness so unnatural so inhuman that it seems you even you had not
the heart to attempt it till my senses were made the previous sacrifice 

here i made an hesitating effort to speak laying down my pen but she
proceeded hear me out guilty wretch abandoned man man did i say 
 yet what name else can i since the mortal worryings of the fiercest
beast would have been more natural and infinitely more welcome that
what you have acted by me and that with a premeditation and contrivance
worthy only of that single heart which now base as well as ungrateful as
thou art seems to quake within thee and well may'st thou quake well
may'st thou tremble and falter and hesitate as thou dost when thou
reflectest upon what i have suffered for thy sake and upon the returns
thou hast made me 

by my soul belford my whole frame was shaken for not only her looks
and her action but her voice so solemn was inexpressibly affecting 
and then my cursed guilt and her innocence and merit and rank and
superiority of talents all stared me at that instant in the face so
formidably that my present account to which she unexpectedly called me 
seemed as i then thought to resemble that general one to which we are
told we shall be summoned when our conscience shall be our accuser 

but she had had time to collect all the powers of her eloquence the
whole day probably in her intellects and then i was the more
disappointed as i had thought i could have gazed the dear creature into
confusion but it is plain that the sense she has of her wrongs sets
this matchless woman above all lesser all weaker considerations 

my dear my love i i i never no never lips trembling limbs quaking 
voice inward hesitating broken never surely did miscreant look so like
a miscreant while thus she proceeded waving her snowy hand with all
the graces of moving oratory 

i have no pride in the confusion visible in thy whole person i have
been all the day praying for a composure if i could not escape from this
vile house that should once more enable me to look up to my destroyer
with the consciousness of an innocent sufferer thou seest me since my
wrongs are beyond the power of words to express thou seest me calm
enough to wish that thou may'st continue harassed by the workings of thy
own conscience till effectual repentance take hold of thee that so thou
may'st not forfeit all title to that mercy which thou hast not shown to
the poor creature now before thee who had so well deserved to meet with
a faithful friend where she met with the worst of enemies 

but tell me for no doubt thou hast some scheme to pursue tell me 
since i am a prisoner as i find in the vilest of houses and have not a
friend to protect or save me what thou intendest shall become of the
remnant of a life not worth the keeping tell me if yet there are more
evils reserved for me and whether thou hast entered into a compact with
the grand deceiver in the person of his horrid agent in this house and
if the ruin of my soul that my father's curse may be fulfilled is to
complete the triumphs of so vile a confederacy answer me say if thou
hast courage to speak out to her whom thou hast ruined tell me what
farther i am to suffer from thy barbarity 

she stopped here and sighing turned her sweet face from me drying up
with her handkerchief those tears which she endeavoured to restrain and 
when she could not to conceal from my sight 

as i told thee i had prepared myself for high passions raving flying 
tearing execration these transient violences the workings of sudden
grief and shame and vengeance would have set us upon a par with each
other and quitted scores these have i been accustomed to and as
nothing violent is lasting with these i could have wished to encounter 
but such a majestic composure seeking me whom yet it is plain by her
attempt to get away she would have avoided seeking no lucretia-like
vengeance upon herself in her thought yet swallowed up her whole mind
swallowed up as i may say by a grief so heavy as in her own words to
be beyond the power of speech to express and to be able discomposed as
she was to the very morning to put such a home-question to me as if
she had penetrated my future view how could i avoid looking like a fool 
and answering as before in broken sentences and confusion 

what what-a what has been done i i i cannot but say must own must
confess hem hem is not right is not what should have been but-a 
but but i am truly truly sorry for it upon my soul i am and and 
will do all do every thing do what whatever is incumbent upon me all
that you that you that you shall require to make you amends 

o belford belford whose the triumph now her's or mine 

amends o thou truly despicable wretch then lifting up her eyes good
heaven who shall pity the creature who could fall by so base a mind 
yet  and then she looked indignantly upon me   yet i hate thee not
 base and low-souled as thou art half so much as i hate myself that i
saw thee not sooner in thy proper colours that i hoped either morality 
gratitude or humanity from a libertine who to be a libertine must
have got over and defied all moral sanctions 


 her cousin morden's words to her in his letter from florence see vol 
iv letter xix 


she then called upon her cousin morden's name as if he had warned her
against a man of free principles and walked towards the window her
handkerchief at her eyes but turning short towards me with an air of
mingled scorn and majesty  what at the moment would i have given never
to have injured her   what amends hast thou to propose what amends can
such a one as thou make to a person of spirit or common sense for the
evils thou hast so inhumanely made me suffer 

as soon madam as soon as as soon as your uncle or not waiting 

thou wouldest tell me i suppose i know what thou wouldest tell me but
thinkest thou that marriage will satisfy for a guilt like thine 
destitute as thou hast made me both of friends and fortune i too much
despise the wretch who could rob himself of his wife's virtue to endure
the thoughts of thee in the light thou seemest to hope i will accept thee
in 

i hesitated an interruption but my meaning died away upon my trembling
lips i could only pronounce the word marriage and thus she proceeded 

let me therefore know whether i am to be controuled in the future
disposal of myself whether in a country of liberty as this where the
sovereign of it must not be guilty of your wickedness and where you
neither durst have attempted it had i one friend or relation to look
upon me i am to be kept here a prisoner to sustain fresh injuries 
whether in a word you intend to hinder me from going where my destiny
shall lead me 

after a pause for i was still silent 

can you not answer me this plain question i quit all claim all
expectation upon you what right have you to detain me here 

i could not speak what could i say to such a question 

o wretch wringing her uplifted hands had i not been robbed of my
senses and that in the basest manner you best know how had i been able
to account for myself and your proceedings or to have known but how the
days passed a whole week should not have gone over my head as i find it
has done before i had told you what i now tell you that the man who
has been the villain to me you have been shall never make me his wife 
i will write to my uncle to lay aside his kind intentions in my favour 
all my prospects are shut in i give myself up for a lost creature as to
this world hinder me not from entering upon a life of severe penitence 
for corresponding after prohibition with a wretch who has too well
justified all their warnings and inveteracy and for throwing myself into
the power of your vile artifices let me try to secure the only hope i
have left this is all the amends i ask of you i repeat therefore am
i now at liberty to dispose of myself as i please 

now comes the fool the miscreant again hesitating his broken answer my
dearest love i am confounded quite confounded at the thought of what 
of what has been done and at the thought of to whom i see i see 
there is no withstanding your eloquence such irresistible proofs of the
love of virtue for its own sake did i never hear of nor meet with in
all my reading and if you can forgive a repentant villain who thus on
his knees implores your forgiveness  then down i dropt absolutely in
earnest in all i said   i vow by all that's sacred and just and may a
thunderbolt strike me dead at your feet if i am not sincere that i
will by marriage before to-morrow noon without waiting for your uncle 
or any body do you all the justice i now can do you and you shall ever
after controul and direct me as you please till you have made me more
worthy of your angelic purity than now i am nor will i presume so much
as to touch your garment till i have the honour to call so great a
blessing lawfully mine 

o thou guileful betrayer there is a just god whom thou invokest yet
the thunderbolt descends not and thou livest to imprecate and deceive 

my dearest life rising for i hoped she was relenting 

hadst thou not sinned beyond the possibility of forgiveness interrupted
she and this had been the first time that thus thou solemnly promisest
and invokest the vengeance thou hast as often defied the desperateness
of my condition might have induced me to think of taking a wretched
chance with a man so profligate but after what i have suffered by
thee it would be criminal in me to wish to bind my soul in covenant to
a man so nearly allied to perdition 

good god how uncharitable i offer not to defend would to heaven that
i could recall so nearly allied to perdition madam so profligate a
man madam 

o how short is expression of thy crimes and of my sufferings such
premeditation is thy baseness to prostitute the characters of persons
of honour of thy own family and all to delude a poor creature whom thou
oughtest but why talk i to thee be thy crimes upon thy head once
more i ask thee am i or am i not at my own liberty now 

i offered to speak in defence of the women declaring that they really
were the very persons 

presume not interrupted she base as thou art to say one word in thine
own vindication i have been contemplating their behaviour their
conversation their over-ready acquiescences to my declarations in thy
disfavour their free yet affectedly-reserved light manners and now
that the sad event has opened my eyes and i have compared facts and
passages together in the little interval that has been lent me i wonder
i could not distinguish the behaviour of the unmatron-like jilt whom
thou broughtest to betray me from the worthy lady whom thou hast the
honour to call thy aunt and that i could not detect the superficial
creature whom thou passedst upon me for the virtuous miss montague 

amazing uncharitableness in a lady so good herself that the high
spirits those ladies were in to see you should subject them to such
censures i do must solemnly vow madam 

that they were interrupting me verily and indeed lady betty lawrance
and thy cousin montague o wretch i see by thy solemn averment  i had
not yet averred it   what credit ought to be given to all the rest had
i no other proof 

interrupting her i besought her patient ear i had found myself i
told her almost avowedly despised and hated i had no hope of gaining
her love or her confidence the letter she had left behind her on her
removal to hampstead sufficiently convinced me that she was entirely
under miss howe's influence and waited but the return of a letter from
her to enter upon measures that would deprive me of her for ever miss
howe had ever been my enemy more so then no doubt from the contents of
the letter she had written to her on her first coming to hampstead that
i dared not to stand the event of such a letter and was glad of an
opportunity by lady betty's and my cousin's means though they knew not
my motive to get her back to town far at the time from intending the
outrage which my despair and her want of confidence in me put me so
vilely upon' 

i would have proceeded and particularly would have said something of
captain tomlinson and her uncle but she would not hear me further and
indeed it was with visible indignation and not without several angry
interruptions that she heard me say so much 

would i dare she asked me to offer at a palliation of my baseness the
two women she was convinced were impostors she knew not but captain
tomlinson and mr mennell were so too but whether they were so or not 
i was and she insisted upon being at her own disposal for the remainder
of her short life for indeed she abhorred me in every light and more
particularly in that in which i offered myself to her acceptance 

and saying this she flung from me leaving me absolutely shocked and
confounded at her part of a conversation which she began with such
uncommon however severe composure and concluded with so much sincere
and unaffected indignation 

and now jack i must address one serious paragraph particularly to thee 

i have not yet touched upon cohabitation her uncle's mediation she does
not absolutely discredit as i had the pleasure to find by one hint in
this conversation yet she suspects my future views and has doubt about
mennell and tomlinson 

i do say if she come fairly at her lights at her clues or what shall i
call them her penetration is wonderful 

but if she do not come at them fairly then is her incredulity then is
her antipathy to me evidently accounted for 

i will speak out thou couldst not surely play me booty jack surely
thou couldst not let thy weak pity for her lead thee to an unpardonable
breach of trust to thy friend who has been so unreserved in his
communications to thee 

i cannot believe thee capable of such a baseness satisfy me however 
upon this head i must make a cursed figure in her eye vowing and
protesting as i shall not scruple occasionally to vow and protest if
all the time she has had unquestionable informations of my perfidy i
know thou as little fearest me as i do thee if any point of manhood 
and wilt scorn to deny it if thou hast done it when thus home-pressed 

and here i have a good mind to stop and write no farther till i have
thy answer 

and so i will 

monday morn past three 



letter xix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday morn five o'clock june 19 


i must write on nothing else can divert me and i think thou canst not
have been a dog to me 

i would fain have closed my eyes but sleep flies me well says horace 
as translated by cowley 

 the halcyon sleep will never build his nest
 in any stormy breast 
 tis not enough that he does find
 clouds and darkness in the mind 
 darkness but half his work will do 
 tis not enough he must find quiet too 

now indeed do i from my heart wish that i had never known this lady but
who would have thought there had been such a woman in the world of all
the sex i have hitherto known or heard or read of it was once subdued 
and always subdued the first struggle was generally the last or at
least the subsequent struggles were so much fainter and fainter that a
man would rather have them than be without them but how know i yet 


 


it is now near six the sun for two hours past has been illuminating
every thing about me for that impartial orb shines upon mother
sinclair's house as well as upon any other but nothing within me can it
illuminate 

at day-dawn i looked through the key-hole of my beloved's door she had
declared she would not put off her clothes any more in this house there
i beheld her in a sweet slumber which i hope will prove refreshing to
her disturbed senses sitting in her elbow-chair her apron over her
head her head supported by one sweet hand the other hand hanging down
upon her side in a sleepy lifelessness half of one pretty foot only
visible 

see the difference in our cases thought i she the charming injured 
can sweetly sleep while the varlet injurer cannot close his eyes and
has been trying to no purpose the whole night to divert his melancholy 
and to fly from himself 

as every vice generally brings on its own punishment even in this life 
if any thing were to tempt me to doubt of future punishment it would be 
that there can hardly be a greater than that in which i at this instant
experience in my own remorse 

i hope it will go off if not well will the dear creature be avenged 
for i shall be the most miserable of men 


 


six o'clock 

just now dorcas tells me that her lady is preparing openly and without
disguise to be gone very probable the humour she flew away from me
in last night has given me expectation of such an enterprize 

now jack to be thus hated and despised and if i have sinned beyond
forgiveness 

but she has sent me a message by dorcas that she will meet me in the
dining-room and desires  odd enough  that the wretch may be present at
the conversation that shall pass between us this message gives me hope 


nine o'clock 

confounded art cunning villany by my soul she had like to have
slipped through my fingers she meant nothing by her message but to get
dorcas out of the way and a clear coast is a fancied distress 
sufficient to justify this lady for dispensing with her principles does
she not show me that she can wilfully deceive as well as i 

had she been in the fore-house and no passage to go through to get at
the street-door she had certainly been gone but her haste betrayed
her for sally martin happening to be in the fore-parlour and hearing a
swifter motion than usual and a rustling of silks as if from somebody
in a hurry looked out and seeing who it was stept between her and the
door and set her back against it 

you must not go madam indeed you must not 

by what right and how dare you and such-like imperious airs the dear
creature gave herself while sally called out for her aunt and half a
dozen voiced joined instantly in the cry for me to hasten down to
hasten down in a moment 

i was gravely instructing dorcas above stairs and wondering what would
be the subject of the conversation to which the wench was to be a
witness when these outcries reached my ears and down i flew and
there was the charming creature the sweet deceiver panting for breath 
her back against the partition a parcel in her hand  women make no
excursions without their parcels   sally polly but polly obligingly
pleaded for her the mother mabell and peter the footman of the
house about her all however keeping their distance the mother and
sally between her and the door in her soft rage the dear soul repeating 
i will go nobody has a right i will go if you kill me women i won't
go up again 

as soon as she saw me she stept a pace or two towards me mr lovelace 
i will go said she do you authorize these women what right have they 
or you either to stop me 

is this my dear preparative to the conversation you led me to expect in
the dining-room and do you thing  sic  i can part with you thus do
you think i will 

and am i sir to be thus beset surrounded thus what have these women
to do with me 

i desired them to leave us all but dorcas who was down as soon as i i
then thought it right to assume an air of resolution having found my
tameness so greatly triumphed over and now my dear said i urging
her reluctant feet be pleased to walk into the fore-parlour here 
since you will not go up stairs here we may hold our parley and dorcas
will be witness to it and now madam seating her and sticking my
hands in my sides your pleasure 

insolent villain said the furious lady and rising ran to the window 
and threw up the sash  she knew not i suppose that there were iron
rails before the windows   and when she found she could not get out
into the street clasping her uplifted hands together having dropt her
parcel for the love of god good honest man for the love of god 
mistress  to two passers by   a poor a poor creature said she ruined 
 

i clasped her in my arms people beginning to gather about the window 
and then she cried out murder help help and carried her up to the
dining-room in spite of her little plotting heart as i may now call
it although she violently struggled catching hold of the banisters
here and there as she could i would have seated her there but she
sunk down half-motionless pale as ashes and a violent burst of tears
happily relieved her 

dorcas wept over her the wench was actually moved for her 

violent hysterics succeeded i left her to mabell dorcas and polly 
the latter the most supportable to her of the sisterhood 

this attempt so resolutely made alarmed me not a little 

mrs sinclair and her nymphs are much more concerned because of the
reputation of their house as they call it having received some insults
 broken windows threatened to make them produce the young creature who
cried out 

while the mobbish inquisitors were in the height of their office the
women came running up to me to know what they should do a constable
being actually fetched 

get the constable into the parlour said i with three or four of the
forwardest of the mob and produce one of the nymphs onion-eyed in a
moment with disordered head-dress and handkerchief and let her own
herself the person the occasion a female skirmish but satisfied with
the justice done her then give a dram or two to each fellow and all
will be well 


eleven o'clock 

all done as i advised and all is well 

mrs sinclair wishes she had never seen the face of so skittish a lady 
and she and sally are extremely pressing with me to leave the perverse
beauty to their breaking as they call it for four or five days but i
cursed them into silence only ordering double precaution for the future 

polly though she consoled the dear perverse one all she could when with
her insists upon it to me that nothing but terror will procure me
tolerable usage 

dorcas was challenged by the women upon her tears she owned them real 
said she was ashamed of herself but could not help it so sincere so
unyielding a grief in so sweet a lady 

the women laughed at her but i bid her make no apologies for her tears 
nor mind their laughing i was glad to see them so ready good use
might be made of such strangers in short i would not have her indulge
them often and try if it were not possible to gain her lady's confidence
by her concern for her 

she said that her lady did take kind notice of them to her and was glad
to see such tokens of humanity in her 

well then said i your part whether any thing come of it or not is to
be tender-hearted it can do no harm if no good but take care you are
not too suddenly or too officiously compassionate 

so dorcas will be a humane good sort of creature i believe very
quickly with her lady and as it becomes women to be so and as my
beloved is willing to think highly of her own sex it will the more
readily pass with her 

i thought to have had one trial having gone so far for cohabitation 
but what hope can there be of succeeding she is invincible against
all my motions against all my conceptions thinking of her as a woman 
and in the very bloom of her charms she is absolutely invincible my
whole view at the present is to do her legal justice if i can but once
more get her out of her altitudes 

the consent of such a woman must make her ever new ever charming but
astonishing can the want of a church-ceremony make such a difference 

she owes me her consent for hitherto i have had nothing to boast of 
all of my side has been deep remorse anguish of mind and love
increased rather than abated 

how her proud rejection stings me and yet i hope still to get her to
listen to my stories of the family-reconciliation and of her uncle and
capt tomlinson and as she has given me a pretence to detain her against
her will she must see me whether in temper or not she cannot help it 
and if love will not do terror as the women advise must be tried 

a nice part after all has my beloved to act if she forgive me easily 
i resume perhaps my projects if she carry her rejection into violence 
that violence may make me desperate and occasion fresh violence she
ought since she thinks she has found the women out to consider where
she is 

i am confoundedly out of conceit with myself if i give up my
contrivances my joy in stratagem and plot and invention i shall be
but a common man such another dull heavy creature as thyself yet what
does even my success in my machinations bring me but regret disgrace 
repentance but i am overmatched egregiously overmatched by this
woman what to do with her or without her i know not 



letter xx

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


i have this moment intelligence from simon parsons one of lord m s
stewards that his lordship is very ill simon who is my obsequious
servant in virtue of my presumptive heirship gives me a hint in his
letter that my presence at m hall will not be amiss so i must
accelerate whatever be the course i shall be allowed or compelled to
take 

no bad prospects for this charming creature if the old peer would be so
kind as to surrender and many a summons has this gout given him a good
8000  a-year and perhaps the title reversionary or a still higher 
would help me up with her 

proudly as this lady pretends to be above all pride grandeur will have
its charms with her for grandeur always makes a man's face shine in a
woman's eye i have a pretty good because a clear estate as it is 
but what a noble variety of mischief will 8000  a-year enable a man to
do 

perhaps thou'lt say i do already all that comes into my head but that's
a mistake not one half i will assure thee and even good folks as i
have heard love to have the power of doing mischief whether they make
use of it or not the late queen anne who was a very good woman was
always fond of prerogative and her ministers in her name in more
instances than one made a ministerial use of this her foible 


 


but now at last am i to be admitted to the presence of my angry
fair-one after three denials nevertheless and a peremptory from me by
dorcas that i must see her in her chamber if i cannot see her in the
dining-room 

dorcas however tells me that she says if she were at her own liberty 
she would never see me more and that she had been asking after the
characters and conditions of the neighbours i suppose now she has
found her voice to call out for help from them if there were any to
hear her 

she will have it now it seems that i had the wickedness from the very
beginning to contrive for her ruin a house so convenient for dreadful
mischief 

dorcas begs of her to be pacified entreats her to see me with patience 
tells her that i am one of the most determined of men as she has heard
say that gentleness may do with me but that nothing else will she
believes and what as her ladyship as she always styles her is
married if i had broken my oath or intended to break it 

she hinted plain enough to the honest wench that she was not married 
but dorcas would not understand her 

this shows she is resolved to keep no measures and now is to be a trial
of skill whether she shall or not 

dorcas has hinted to her my lord's illness as a piece of intelligence
that dropt in conversation from me 

but here i stop my beloved pursuant to my peremptory message is just
gone up into the dining-room 



letter xxi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday afternoon 


pity me jack for pity's sake since if thou dost not nobody else
will and yet never was there a man of my genius and lively temper that
wanted it more we are apt to attribute to the devil every thing happens
to us which we would not have happen but here being as perhaps
thou'lt say the devil myself my plagues arise from an angel i
suppose all mankind is to be plagued by its contrary 

she began with me like a true woman  she in the fault i to be blamed  
the moment i entered the dining-room not the least apology not the
least excuse for the uproar she had made and the trouble she had given
me 

i come said she into thy detested presence because i cannot help it 
but why am i to be imprisoned here although to no purpose i cannot
help 

dearest madam interrupted i give not way to so much violence you must
know that your detention is entirely owing to the desire i have to make
you all the amends that is in my power to make you and this as well for
your sake as my own surely there is still one way left to repair
the wrongs you have suffered 

canst thou blot out the past week several weeks past i should say 
ever since i have been with thee canst thou call back time if thou
canst 

surely madam again interrupting her if i may be permitted to call you
legally mine i might have but anticip 

wretch that thou art say not another word upon this subject when
thou vowedst when thou promisedst at hampstead i had begun to think
that i must be thine if i had consented at the request of those i
thought thy relations this would have been a principal inducement that
i could then have brought thee what was most wanted an unsullied honour
in dowry to a wretch destitute of all honour and could have met the
gratulations of a family to which thy life has been one continued
disgrace with a consciousness of deserving their gratulations but
thinkest thou that i will give a harlot niece to thy honourable uncle 
and to thy real aunts and a cousin to thy cousins from a brothel for
such in my opinion is this detested house then lifting up her
clasped hands great and good god of heaven  said she give me
patience to support myself under the weight of those afflictions which
thou for wise and good ends though at present impenetrable by me hast
permitted 

then turning towards me who knew neither what to say to her nor for
myself i renounce thee for ever lovelace abhorred of my soul for
ever i renounce thee seek thy fortunes wheresoever thou wilt only
now that thou hast already ruined me 

ruined you madam the world need not i knew not what to say 

ruined me in my own eyes and that is the same to me as if all the world
knew it hinder me not from going whither my mysterious destiny shall
lead me 

why hesitate you sir what right have you to stop me as you lately
did and to bring me up by force my hands and arms bruised by your
violence what right have you to detain me here 

i am cut to the heart madam with invectives so violent i am but too
sensible of the wrong i have done you or i could not bear your
reproaches the man who perpetrates a villany and resolves to go on
with it shows not the compunction i show yet if you think yourself
in my power i would caution you madam not to make me desperate for
you shall be mine or my life shall be the forfeit nor is life worth
having without you 

be thine i be thine said the passionate beauty o how lovely in her
violence 

yes madam be mine i repeat you shall be mine my very crime is your
glory my love my admiration of you is increased by what has passed 
and so it ought i am willing madam to court your returning favour 
but let me tell you were the house beset by a thousand armed men 
resolved to take you from me they should not effect their purpose while
i had life 

i never never will be your's said she clasping her hands together and
lifting up her eyes i never will be your's 

we may yet see many happy years madam all your friends may be
reconciled to you the treaty for that purpose is in greater forwardness
than you imagine you know better than to think the worse of yourself
for suffering what you could not help enjoin but the terms i can make
my peace with you upon and i will instantly comply 

never never repeated she will i be your's 

only forgive me my dearest life this one time a virtue so invincible 
what further view can i have against you have i attempted any further
outrage if you will be mine your injuries will be injuries done to
myself you have too well guessed at the unnatural arts that have been
used but can a greater testimony be given of your virtue and now i
have only to hope that although i cannot make you complete amends yet
you will permit me to make you all the amends that can possibly be made 

here  sic  me out i beseech you madam for she was going to speak with
an aspect unpacifiedly angry the god whom you serve requires but
repentance and amendment imitate him my dearest love and bless me
with the means of reforming a course of life that begins to be hateful to
me that was once your favourite point resume it dearest creature in
charity to a soul as well as body which once as i flattered myself 
was more than indifferent to you resume it and let to-morrow's sun
witness to our espousals 

i cannot judge thee said she but the god to whom thou so boldly
referrest can and assure thyself he will but if compunction has
really taken hold of thee if indeed thou art touched for thy
ungrateful baseness and meanest any thing by this pleading the holy
example thou recommendest to my imitation in this thy pretended
repentant moment let me sift thee thoroughly and by thy answer i shall
judge of the sincerity of thy pretended declarations 

tell me then is there any reality in the treaty thou has pretended to
be on foot between my uncle and capt tomlinson and thyself say and
hesitate not is there any truth in that story but remember if there
be not and thou avowest that there is what further condemnation attends
to thy averment if it be as solemn as i require it to be 

this was a cursed thrust what could i say surely this merciless lady
is resolved to d n me thought i and yet accuses me of a design against
her soul but was i not obliged to proceed as i had begun 

in short i solemnly averred that there was how one crime as the good
folks say brings on another 

i added that the captain had been in town and would have waited on her 
had she not been indisposed that he went down much afflicted as well on
her account as on that of her uncle though i had not acquainted him
either with the nature of her disorder or the ever-to-be-regretted
occasion of it having told him that it was a violent fever that he had
twice since by her uncle's desire sent up to inquire after her health 
and that i had already dispatched a man and horse with a letter to
acquaint him and her uncle through him with her recovery making it
my earnest request that he would renew his application to her uncle for
the favour of his presence at the private celebrations of our nuptials 
and that i expected an answer if not this night as to-morrow 

let me ask thee next said she thou knowest the opinion i have of the
women thou broughtest to me at hampstead and who have seduced me hither
to my ruin let me ask thee if really and truly they were lady betty
lawrance and thy cousin montague what sayest thou hesitate not what
sayest thou to this question 

astonishing my dear that you should suspect them but knowing your
strange opinion of them what can i say to be believed 

and is this the answer thou returnest me dost thou thus evade my
question but let me know for i am trying thy sincerity now and all
shall judge of thy new professions by thy answer to this question let me
know i repeat whether those women be really lady betty lawrance and thy
cousin montague 

let me my dearest love be enabled to-morrow to call you lawfully mine 
and we will set out the next day if you please to berkshire to my lord
m s where they both are at this time and you shall convince yourself
by your own eyes and by your own ears which you will believe sooner
than all i can say or swear 

now belford i had really some apprehension of treachery from thee 
which made me so miserably evade for else i could as safely have sworn
to the truth of this as to that of the former but she pressing me still
for a categorical answer i ventured plumb and swore to it  lover's
oaths jack   that they were really and truly lady betty lawrance and my
cousin montague 

she lifted up her hands and eyes what can i think what can i think 

you think me a devil madam a very devil or you could not after you
have put these questions to me seem to doubt the truth of answers so
solemnly sworn to 

and if i do think thee so have i not cause is there another man in the
world i hope for the sake of human nature there is not who could act
by any poor friendless creature as thou hast acted by me whom thou hast
made friendless and who before i knew thee had for a friend every one
who knew me 

i told you madam before that lady betty and my cousin were actually
here in order to take leave of you before they set out for berkshire 
but the effects of my ungrateful crime such with shame and remorse i
own it to be were the reason you could not see them nor could i be
fond that they should see you since they never would have forgiven me 
had they known what had passed and what reason had i to expect your
silence on the subject had you been recovered 

it signifies nothing now that the cause of their appearance has been
answered in my ruin who or what they are but if thou hast averred thus
solemnly to two falsehoods what a wretch do i see before me 

i thought she had now reason to be satisfied and i begged her to allow
me to talk to her of to-morrow as of the happiest day of my life we
have the license madam and you must excuse me that i cannot let you go
hence till i have tried every way i can to obtain your forgiveness 

and am i then  with a kind of frantic wildness   to be detained a
prisoner in this horrid house am i sir take care take care holding
up her hand menacing how you make me desperate if i fall though by
my own hand inquisition will be made for my blood and be not out in thy
plot lovelace if it should be so make sure work i charge thee dig a
hole deep enough to cram in and conceal this unhappy body for depend
upon it that some of those who will not stir to protect me living will
move heaven and earth to avenge me dead 

a horrid dear creature by my soul she made me shudder she had need
indeed to talk of her unhappiness in falling into the hands of the only
man in the world who could have used her as i have used her she is the
only woman in the world who could have shocked and disturbed me as she
has done so we are upon a foot in that respect and i think i have the
worst of it by much since very little has been my joy very much my
trouble and her punishment as she calls it is over but when mine
will or what it may be who can tell 

here only recapitulating think then how i must be affected at the
time i was forced to leave off and sing a song to myself i aimed at
a lively air but i croaked rather than sung and fell into the old
dismal thirtieth of january strain i hemmed up for a sprightlier note 
but it would not do and at last i ended like a malefactor in a dead
psalm melody 

heigh-ho i gape like an unfledged kite in its nest wanting to swallow
a chicken bobbed at its mouth by its marauding dam 

what a-devil ails me i can neither think nor write 

lie down pen for a moment 



letter xxii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


there is certainly a good deal in the observation that it costs a man
ten times more pains to be wicked than it would cost him to be good what
a confounded number of contrivances have i had recourse to in order
to carry my point with this charming creature and yet after all how
have i puzzled myself by it and yet am near tumbling into the pit which
it was the end of all my plots to shun what a happy man had i been with
such an excellence could i have brought my mind to marry when i first
prevailed upon her to quit her father's house but then as i have often
reflected how had i known that a but blossoming beauty who could carry
on a private correspondence and run such risques with a notorious wild
fellow was not prompted by inclination which one day might give such a
free-liver as myself as much pain to reflect upon as at the time it
gave me pleasure thou rememberest the host's tale in ariosto and thy
experience as well as mine can furnish out twenty fiametta's in proof
of the imbecility of the sex 

but to proceed with my narrative 

the dear creature resumed the topic her heart was so firmly fixed upon 
and insisted upon quitting the odious house and that in very high terms 

i urged her to meet me the next day at the altar in either of the two
churches mentioned in the license and i besought her whatever was her
resolution to let me debate this matter calmly with her 

if she said i would have her give what i desired the least moment's
consideration i must not hinder her from being her own mistress to
what purpose did i ask her consent if she had not a power over either
her own person or actions 

will you give me your honour madam if i consent to your quitting a
house so disagreeable to you 

my honour sir said the dear creature alas and turned weeping from
me with inimitable grace as if she had said alas you have robbed me
of my honour 

i hoped then that her angry passions were subsiding but i was mistaken 
for urging her warmly for the day and that for the sake of our mutual
honour and the honour of both our families in this high-flown and
high-souled strain she answered me 

and canst thou lovelace be so mean as to wish to make a wife of the
creature thou hast insulted dishonoured and abused as thou hast me 
was it necessary to humble me down to the low level of thy baseness 
before i could be a wife meet for thee thou hadst a father who was a
man of honour a mother who deserved a better son thou hast an uncle 
who is no dishonour to the peerage of a kingdom whose peers are more
respectable than the nobility of any other country thou hast other
relations also who may be thy boast though thou canst not be theirs 
and canst thou not imagine that thou hearest them calling upon thee the
dead from their monuments the living from their laudable pride not to
dishonour thy ancient and splendid house by entering into wedlock with a
creature whom thou hast levelled with the dirt of the street and classed
with the vilest of her sex 

i extolled her greatness of soul and her virtue i execrated myself for
my guilt and told her how grateful to the manes of my ancestors as
well as to the wishes of the living the honour i supplicated for would
be 

but still she insisted upon being a free agent of seeing herself in
other lodgings before she would give what i urged the least
consideration nor would she promise me favour even then or to permit
my visits how then as i asked her could i comply without resolving
to lose her for ever 

she put her hand to her forehead often as she talked and at last 
pleading disorder in her head retired neither of us satisfied with the
other but she ten times more dissatisfied with me than i with her 

dorcas seems to be coming into favour with her 

what now what now 


monday night 

how determined is this lady again had she like to have escaped us 
what a fixed resentment she only i find assumed a little calm in
order to quiet suspicion she was got down and actually had unbolted
the street-door before i could get to her alarmed as i was by mrs 
sinclair's cookmaid who was the only one that saw her fly through the
passage yet lightning was not quicker than i 

again i brought her back to the dining-room with infinite reluctance on
her part and before her face ordered a servant to be placed
constantly at the bottom of the stairs for the future 

she seemed even choked with grief and disappointment 

dorcas was exceedingly assiduous about her and confidently gave it as
her own opinion that her dear lady should be permitted to go to another
lodging since this was so disagreeable to her were she to be killed for
saying so she would say it and was good dorcas for this afterwards 

but for some time the dear creature was all passion and violence 

i see i see said she when i had brought her up what i am to expect
from your new professions o vilest of men 

have i offered t you my beloved creature any thing that can justify
this impatience after a more hopeful calm 

she wrung her hands she disordered her head-dress she tore her
ruffles she was in a perfect phrensy 

i dreaded her returning malady but entreaty rather exasperating i
affected an angry air i bid her expect the worst she had to fear and
was menacing on in hopes to intimidate her when dropping to my feet 

twill be a mercy said she the highest act of mercy you can do to kill
me outright upon this spot this happy spot as i will in my last
moments call it then baring with a still more frantic violence part
of her enchanting neck here here said the soul-harrowing beauty let
thy pointed mercy enter and i will thank thee and forgive thee for all
the dreadful past with my latest gasp will i forgive and thank thee 
or help me to the means and i will myself put out of the way so
miserable a wretch and bless thee for those means 

why all this extravagant passion why all these exclamations have i
offered any new injury to you my dearest life what a phrensy is this 
am i not ready to make you all the reparation that i can make you had i
not reason to hope 

no no no no as before shaking her head with wild impatience as
resolved not to attend to what i said 

my resolutions are so honourable if you will permit them to take effect 
that i need not be solicitous where you go if you will but permit my
visits and receive my vows and god is my witness that i bring you not
back from the door with any view to your dishonour but the contrary and
this moment i will send for a minister to put an end to all your doubts
and fears 

say this and say a thousand times more and bind every word with a
solemn appeal to that god whom thou art accustomed to invoke to the truth
of the vilest falsehoods and all will still be short of what thou has
vowed and promised to me and were not my heart to abhor thee and to
rise against thee for thy perjuries as it does i would not i tell
thee once more i would not bind my soul in covenant with such a man 
for a thousand worlds 

compose yourself however madam for your own sake compose yourself 
permit me to raise you up abhorred as i am of your soul 

nay if i must not touch you for she wildly slapt my hands but with
such a sweet passionate air her bosom heaving and throbbing as she
looked up to me that although i was most sincerely enraged i could with
transport have pressed her to mine 

if i must not touch you i will not but depend upon it  and i assumed
the sternest air i could assume to try what it would do   depend upon
it madam that this is not the way to avoid the evils you dread let me
do what i will i cannot be used worse dorcas begone 

she arose dorcas being about to withdraw and wildly caught hold of her
arm o dorcas if thou art of mine own sex leave me not i charge thee 
 then quitting dorcas down she threw herself upon her knees in the
furthermost corner of the room clasping a chair with her face laid upon
the bottom of it o where can i be safe where where can i be safe 
from this man of violence 

this gave dorcas an opportunity to confirm herself in her lady's
confidence the wench threw herself at my feet while i seemed in violent
wrath and embracing my knees kill me sir kill me sir if you please 
 i must throw myself in your way to save my lady i beg your pardon 
sir but you must be set on god forgive the mischief-makers but your
own heart if left to itself would not permit these things spare 
however sir spare my lady i beseech you bustling on her knees about
me as if i were intending to approach her lady had i not been
restrained by her 

this humoured by me begone devil officious devil begone startled
the dear creature who snatching up hastily her head from the chair and
as hastily popping it down again in terror hit her nose i suppose 
against the edge of the chair and it gushed out with blood running in a
stream down her bosom she herself was too much frighted to heed it 

never was mortal man in such terror and agitation as i for i instantly
concluded that she had stabbed herself with some concealed instrument 

i ran to her in a wild agony for dorcas was frighted out of all her mock
interposition 

what have you done o what have you done look up to me my dearest
life sweet injured innocence look up to me what have you done long
will i not survive you and i was upon the point of drawing my sword to
dispatch myself when i discovered  what an unmanly blockhead does this
charming creature make me at her pleasure   that all i apprehended was
but a bloody nose which as far as i know for it could not be stopped
in a quarter of an hour may have saved her head and her intellects 

but i see by this scene that the sweet creature is but a pretty coward
at bottom and that i can terrify her out of her virulence against me 
whenever i put on sternness and anger but then as a qualifier to the
advantage this gives me over her i find myself to be a coward too which
i had not before suspected since i was capable of being so easily
terrified by the apprehensions of her offering violence to herself 



letter xxiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


but with all this dear creature's resentment against me i cannot for my
heart think but she will get all over and consent to enter the pale
with me were she even to die to-morrow and to know she should would
not a woman of her sense of her punctilio and in her situation and of
so proud a family rather die married than otherwise no doubt but she
would although she were to hate the man ever so heartily if so there
is now but one man in the world whom she can have and that is me 

now i talk  familiar writing is but talking jack  thus glibly of
entering the pale thou wilt be ready to question me i know as to my
intentions on this head 

as much of my heart as i know of it myself will i tell thee when i am
from her i cannot still help hesitating about marriage and i even
frequently resolve against it and determine to press my favourite scheme
for cohabitation but when i am with her i am ready to say to swear 
and to do whatever i think will be the most acceptable to her and were
a parson at hand i should plunge at once no doubt of it into the
state 

i have frequently thought in common cases that it is happy for many
giddy fellows  there are giddy fellows as well as giddy girls jack and
perhaps those are as often drawn in as these  that ceremony and parade
are necessary to the irrevocable solemnity and that there is generally
time for a man to recollect himself in the space between the heated
over-night and the cooler next morning or i know not who could escape
the sweet gypsies whose fascinating powers are so much aided by our own
raised imaginations 

a wife at any time i used to say i had ever confidence and vanity
enough to think that no woman breathing could deny her hand when i held
out mine i am confoundedly mortified to find that this lady is able to
hold me at bay and to refuse all my honest vows 

what force  allow me a serious reflection jack it will be put down 
what force  have evil habits upon the human mind when we enter upon a
devious course we think we shall have it in our power when we will
return to the right path but it is not so i plainly see for who can
acknowledge with more justice this dear creature's merits and his own
errors than i whose regret at times can be deeper than mine for the
injuries i have done her whose resolutions to repair those injuries
stronger yet how transitory is my penitence how am i hurried away 
canst thou tell by what o devil of youth and devil of intrigue how do
you mislead me how often do we end in occasions for the deepest
remorse what we begin in wantonness 

at the present writing however the turn of the scale is in behalf of
matrimony for i despair of carrying with her my favourite point 

the lady tells dorcas that her heart is broken and that she shall live
but a little while i think nothing of that if we marry in the first
place she knows not what a mind unapprehensive will do for her in a
state to which all the sex look forwards with high satisfaction how
often have the whole of the sacred conclave been thus deceived in their
choice of a pope not considering that the new dignity is of itself
sufficient to give new life a few months' heart's ease will give my
charmer a quite different notion of things and i dare say as i have
heretofore said once married and i am married for life 


 see letter ix of this volume 


i will allow that her pride in one sense has suffered abasement but
her triumph is the greater in every other and while i can think that
all her trials are but additions to her honour and that i have laid the
foundations of her glory in my own shame can i be called cruel if i am
not affected with her grief as some men would be 

and for what should her heart be broken her will is unviolated at
present however her will is unviolated the destroying of good habits 
and the introducing of bad to the corrupting of the whole heart is the
violation that her will is not to be corrupted that her mind is not to
be debased she has hitherto unquestionably proved and if she give
cause for farther trials and hold fast her integrity what ideas will
she have to dwell upon that will be able to corrupt her morals what
vestigia what remembrances but such as will inspire abhorrence of the
attempter 

what nonsense then to suppose that such a mere notional violation as she
has suffered should be able to cut asunder the strings of life 

her religion married or not married will set her above making such a
trifling accident such an involuntary suffering fatal to her 

such considerations as these they are that support me against all
apprehensions of bugbear consequences and i would have them have weight
with thee who are such a doughty advocate for her and yet i allow thee
this that she really makes too much of it takes it too much to heart 
to be sure she ought to have forgot it by this time except the charming 
charming consequence happen that still i am in hopes will happen were i
to proceed no farther and if she apprehended this herself then has
the dear over-nice soul some reason for taking it so much to heart and
yet would not i think refuse to legitimate 

o jack had i am imperial diadem i swear to thee that i would give it
up even to my enemy to have one charming boy by this lady and should
she escape me and no such effect follow my revenge on her family and 
in such a case on herself would be incomplete and i should reproach
myself as long as i lived 

were i to be sure that this foundation is laid  and why may i not hope it
is   i should not doubt to have her still should she withstand her day
of grace on my own conditions nor should i if it were so question
that revived affection in her which a woman seldom fails to have for the
father of her first child whether born in wedlock or out of it 

and pr'ythee jack see in this my ardent hope a distinction in my
favour from other rakes who almost to a man follow their inclinations
without troubling themselves about consequences in imitation as one
would think of the strutting villain of a bird which from feathered
lady to feathered lady pursues his imperial pleasures leaving it to his
sleek paramours to hatch the genial product in holes and corners of their
own finding out 



letter xxiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday morn june 20 


well jack now are we upon another footing together this dear creature
will not let me be good she is now authorizing all my plots by her own
example 

thou must be partial in the highest degree if now thou blamest me for
resuming my former schemes since in that case i shall but follow her
cue no forced construction of her actions do i make on this occasion 
in order to justify a bad cause or a worse intention a slight pretence 
indeed served the wolf when he had a mind to quarrel with the lamb but
this is not now my case 

for here wouldst thou have thought it taking advantage of dorcas's
compassionate temper and of some warm expressions which the
tender-hearted wench let fall against the cruelty of men and wishing to
have it in her power to serve her has she given her the following note 
signed by her maiden name for she has thought fit in positive and plain
words to own to the pitying dorcas that she is not married 


monday june 19 

i then underwritten do hereby promise that on my coming into possession
of my own estate i will provide for dorcas martindale in a gentlewoman-
like manner in my own house or if i do not soon obtain that
possession or should first die i do hereby bind myself my executors 
and administrators to pay to her or her order during the term of her
natural life the sum of five pounds on each of the four usual quarterly
days in the year on condition that she faithfully assist me in my escape
from an illegal confinement under which i now labour the first
quarterly payment to commence and be payable at the end of three months
immediately following the day of my deliverance and i do also promise
to give her as a testimony of my honour in the rest a diamond ring 
which i have showed her witness my hand this nineteenth day of june in
the year above written 

clarissa harlowe 


now jack what terms wouldst thou have me to keep with such a sweet
corruptress seest thou not how she hates me seest thou not that she
is resolved never to forgive me seest thou not however that she must
disgrace herself in the eye of the world if she actually should escape 
that she must be subjected to infinite distress and hazard for whom has
she to receive and protect her yet to determine to risque all these
evils and furthermore to stoop to artifice to be guilty of the reigning
vice of the times of bribery and corruption o jack jack say not 
write not another word in her favour 

thou hast blamed me for bringing her to this house but had i carried her
to any other in england where there would have been one servant or
inmate capable either of compassion or corruption what must have been
the consequence 

but seest thou not however that in this flimsy contrivance the dear
implacable like a drowning man catches at a straw to save herself a
straw shall she find to be the refuge she has resorted to 



letter xxv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tues morn ten o'clock


very ill exceedingly ill as dorcas tells me in order to avoid seeing
me and yet the dear soul may be so in her mind but is not that
equivocation some one passion predominating in every human breast 
breaks through principle and controuls us all mine is love and revenge
taking turns her's is hatred but this is my consolation that hatred
appeased is love begun or love renewed i may rather say if love ever
had footing here 

but reflectioning apart thou seest jack that her plot is beginning to
work to-morrow is to break out 

i have been abroad to set on foot a plot of circumvention all fair
now belford 

i insisted upon visiting my indisposed fair-one dorcas made officious
excuses for her i cursed the wench in her hearing for her impertinence 
and stamped and made a clutter which was improved into an apprehension
to the lady that i would have flung her faithful confidante from the top
of the stairs to the bottom 

he is a violent wretch but dorcas  dear dorcas now it is   thou
shalt have a friend in me to the last day of my life 

and what now jack dost think the name of her good angel is why dorcas
martindale christian and super no more wykes as in the promissory note
in my former and the dear creature has bound her to her by the most
solemn obligations besides the tie of interest 

whither madam do you design to go when you get out of this house 

i will throw myself into the first open house i can find and beg
protection till i can get a coach or a lodging in some honest family 

what will you do for clothes madam i doubt you'll be able to take any
away with you but what you'll have on 

o no matter for clothes if i can but get out of this house 

what will you do for money madam i have heard his honour express his
concern that he could not prevail upon you to be obliged to him though
he apprehended that you must be short of money 

o i have rings and other valuables indeed i have but four guineas and
two of them i found lately wrapt up in a bit of lace designed for a
charitable use but now alas charity begins at home but i have one
dear friend left if she be living as i hope in god she is to whom i
can be obliged if i want o dorcas i must ere now have heard from her 
if i had had fair play 

well madam your's is a hard lot i pity you at my heart 

thank you dorcas i am unhappy that i did not think before that i might
have confided in thy pity and in thy sex 

i pitied you madam often and often but you were always as i thought 
diffident of me and then i doubted not but you were married and i
thought his honour was unkindly used by you so that i thought it my
duty to wish well to his honour rather than to what i thought to be your
humours madam would to heaven that i had known before that you were
not married such a lady such a fortune to be so sadly betrayed 

ah dorcas i was basely drawn in my youth my ignorance of the world
 and i have some things to reproach myself with when i look back 

lord madam what deceitful creatures are these men neither oaths nor
vows i am sure i am sure  and then with her apron she gave her eyes
half a dozen hearty rubs  i may curse the time that i came into this
house 

here was accounting for her bold eyes and was it not better for dorcas
to give up a house which her lady could not think worse of than she did 
in order to gain the reputation of sincerity than by offering to
vindicate it to make her proffered services suspected 

poor dorcas bless me how little do we who have lived all our time in
the country know of this wicked town 

had i been able to write cried the veteran wench i should certainly
have given some other near relations i have in wales a little inkling of
matters and they would have saved me from from from 

her sobs were enough the apprehensions of women on such subjects are
ever aforehand with speech 

and then sobbing on she lifted her apron to her face again she showed
me how 

poor dorcas again wiping her own charming eyes 

all love all compassion is this dear creature to every one in
affliction but me 

and would not an aunt protect her kinswoman abominable wretch 

i can't i can't i can't say my aunt was privy to it she gave me
good advice she knew not for a great while that i was that i was that
i was ugh ugh ugh 

no more no more good dorcas what a world do we live in what a house
am i in but come don't weep though she herself could not forbear 
my being betrayed into it though to my own ruin may be a happy event
for thee and if i live it shall 

i thank you my good lady blubbering i am sorry very sorry you have
had so hard a lot but it may be the saving of my soul if i can get to
your ladyship's house had i but known that your ladyship was not
married i would have eat my own flesh before before before 

dorcas sobbed and wept the lady sighed and wept also 

but now jack for a serious reflection upon the premises 

how will the good folks account for it that satan has such faithful
instruments and that the bond of wickedness is a stronger bond than the
ties of virtue as if it were the nature of the human mind to be villanous 
for here had dorcas been good and been tempted as she was tempted to any
thing evil i make no doubt but she would have yielded to the temptation 

and cannot our fraternity in an hundred instances give proof of the like
predominance of vice over virtue and that we have risked more to serve
and promote the interests of the former than ever a good man did to
serve a good man or a good cause for have we not been prodigal of life
and fortune have we not defied the civil magistrate upon occasion and
have we not attempted rescues and dared all things only to extricate a
pounded profligate 

whence jack can this be 

o i have it i believe the vicious are as bad as they can be and do
the devil's work without looking after while he is continually spreading
snares for the others and like a skilful angler suiting his baits to
the fish he angles for 

nor let even honest people so called blame poor dorcas for her fidelity
in a bad cause for does not the general who implicitly serves an
ambitious prince in his unjust designs upon his neighbours or upon his
own oppressed subjects and even the lawyer who for the sake of a
paltry fee undertakes to whiten a black cause and to defend it against
one he knows to be good do the very same thing as dorcas and are they
not both every whit as culpable yet the one shall be dubbed a hero the
other called an admirable fellow and be contended for by every client 
and his double-tongued abilities shall carry him through all the high
preferments of the law with reputation and applause 

well but what shall be done since the lady is so much determined on
removing is there no way to oblige her and yet to make the very act
subservient to my other views i fancy such a way may be found out 

i will study for it 

suppose i suffer her to make an escape her heart is in it if she
effect it the triumph she will have over me upon it will be a
counterbalance for all she has suffered 

i will oblige her if i can 



letter xxvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


tired with a succession of fatiguing days and sleepless nights and with
contemplating the precarious situation i stand in with my beloved i fell
into a profound reverie which brought on sleep and that produced a
dream a fortunate dream which as i imagine will afford my working
mind the means to effect the obliging double purpose my heart is now once
more set upon 

what as i have often contemplated is the enjoyment of the finest woman
in the world to the contrivance the bustle the surprises and at last
the happy conclusion of a well-laid plot the charming round-abouts to
come to the nearest way home the doubts the apprehensions the
heart-achings the meditated triumphs these are the joys that make the
blessing dear for all the rest what is it what but to find an angel
in imagination dwindled down to a woman in fact but to my dream 

methought it was about nine on wednesday morning that a chariot with a
dowager's arms upon the doors and in it a grave matronly lady  not
unlike mother h in the face but in her heart oh how unlike   stopped
at a grocer's shop about ten doors on the other side of the way in
order to buy some groceries and methought dorcas having been out to see
if the coast were clear for her lady's flight and if a coach were to be
got near the place espied the chariot with the dowager's arms and this
matronly lady and what methought did dorcas that subtle traitress 
do but whip up to the old matronly lady and lifting up her voice say 
good my lady permit me one word with your ladyship 

what thou hast to say to me say on quoth the old lady the grocer
retiring and standing aloof to give dorcas leave to speak who 
methought in words like these accosted the lady 

you seem madam to be a very good lady and here in this
neighbourhood at a house of no high repute is an innocent lady of rank
and fortune beautiful as a may morning and youthful as a rose-bud and
full as sweet and lovely who has been tricked thither by a wicked
gentleman practised in the ways of the town and this very night will
she be ruined if she get not out of his hands now o lady if you will
extend your compassionate goodness to this fair young lady in whom the
moment you behold her you will see cause to believe all i say and let
her but have a place in your chariot and remain in your protection for
one day only till she can send a man and horse to her rich and powerful
friends you may save from ruin a lady who has no equal for virtue as
well as beauty 

methought the old lady moved with dorcas's story answered and said 
hasten o damsel who in a happy moment art come to put it in my power
to serve the innocent and virtuous which it has always been my delight
to do hasten to this young lady and bid her hie hither to me with all
speed and tell her that my chariot shall be her asylum and if i find
all that thou sayest true my house shall be her sanctuary and i will
protect her from all her oppressors 

hereupon methought this traitress dorcas hied back to the lady and
made report of what she had done and methought the lady highly
approved of dorcas's proceeding and blessed her for her good thought 

and i lifted up mine eyes and behold the lady issued out of the house 
and without looking back ran to the chariot with the dowager's coat upon
it and was received by the matronly lady with open arms and welcome 
welcome welcome fair young lady who so well answer the description of
the faithful damsel and i will carry you instantly to my house where
you shall meet with all the good usage your heart can wish for till you
can apprize your rich and powerful friends of your past dangers and
present escape 

thank you thank you thank you thank you worthy thrice worthy lady 
who afford so kindly your protection to a most unhappy young creature 
who has been basely seduced and betrayed and brought to the very brink
of destruction 

methought then the matronly lady who had by the time the young lady
came to her bought and paid for the goods she wanted ordered her
coachman to drive home with all speed who stopped not till he had
arrived in a certain street not far from lincoln's-inn-fields where the
matronly lady lived in a sumptuous dwelling replete with damsels who
wrought curiously in muslins cambrics and fine linen and in every good
work that industrious damsels love to be employed about except the loom
and the spinning-wheel 

and methought all the way the young lady and the old lady rode and
after they came in till dinner was ready the young lady filled up the
time with the dismal account of her wrongs and her sufferings the like
of which was never heard by mortal ear and this in so moving a manner 
that the good old lady did nothing but weep and sigh and sob and
inveigh against the arts of wicked men and against that abominable
squire lovelace who was a plotting villain methought she said and
more than that an unchained beelzebub 

methought i was in a dreadful agony when i found the lady had escaped 
and in my wrath had like to have slain dorcas and our mother and every
one i met but by some quick transition and strange metamorphosis 
which dreams do not usually account for methought all of a sudden this
matronly lady turned into the famous mother h herself and being an old
acquaintance of mother sinclair was prevailed upon to assist in my plot
upon the young lady 

then methought followed a strange scene for mother h longing to hear
more of the young lady's story and night being come besought her to
accept of a place in her own bed in order to have all the talk to
themselves for methought two young nieces of her's had broken in upon
them in the middle of the dismal tale 

accordingly going early to bed and the sad story being resumed with as
great earnestness on one side as attention on the other before the young
lady had gone far in it mother h methought was taken with a fit of the
colic and her tortures increasing was obliged to rise to get a cordial
she used to find specific in this disorder to which she was unhappily
subject 

having thus risen and stept to her closet methought she let fall the
wax taper in her return and then  o metamorphosis still stranger than
the former what unaccountable things are dreams   coming to bed again in
the dark the young lady to her infinite astonishment grief and
surprise found mother h turned into a young person of the other sex 
and although lovelace was the abhorred of her soul yet fearing it was
some other person it was matter of consolation to her when she found it
was no other than himself and that she had been still the bed-fellow of
but one and the same man 

a strange promiscuous huddle of adventures followed scenes perpetually
shifting now nothing heard from the lady but sighs groans 
exclamations faintings dyings from the gentleman but vows promises 
protestations disclaimers of purposes pursued and all the gentle and
ungentle pressures of the lover's warfare 

then as quick as thought for dreams thou knowest confine not
themselves to the rules of the drama ensued recoveries lyings-in 
christenings the smiling boy amply even in her own opinion rewarding
the suffering mother 

then the grandfather's estate yielded up possession taken of it living
very happily upon it her beloved norton her companion miss howe her
visiter and admirable thrice admirable enabled to compare notes with
her a charming girl by the same father to her friend's charming boy 
who as they grow up in order to consolidate their mamma's friendships 
 for neither have dreams regard to consanguinity intermarry change
names by act of parliament to enjoy my estate and i know not what of
the like incongruous stuff 

i awoke as thou mayest believe in great disorder and rejoiced to find
my charmer in the next room and dorcas honest 

now thou wilt say this was a very odd dream and yet for i am a
strange dreamer it is not altogether improbable that something like it
may happen as the pretty simpleton has the weakness to confide in
dorcas whom till now she disliked 

but i forgot to tell thee one part of my dream and that was that the
next morning the lady gave way to such transports of grief and
resentment that she was with difficulty diverted from making an attempt
upon her own life but however at last was prevailed upon to resolve
to live and make the best of the matter a letter methought from
captain tomlinson helping to pacify her written to apprize me that her
uncle harlowe would certainly be at kentish-town on wednesday night june
28 the following day the 29th being his birth-day and be doubly
desirous on that account that our nuptials should be then privately
solemnized in his presence 

but is thursday the 29th her uncle's anniversary methinks thou askest 
 it is or else the day of celebration should have been earlier still 
three weeks ago i heard her say it was and i have down the birthday of
every one in the family and the wedding-day of her father and mother 
the minutest circumstances are often of great service in matters of the
last importance 

and what sayest thou now to my dream 

who says that sleeping and waking i have not fine helps from somebody 
some spirit rather as thou'lt be apt to say but no wonder that a
beelzebub has his devilkins to attend his call 

i can have no manner of doubt of succeeding in mother h s part of the
scheme for will the lady who resolves to throw herself into the first
house she can enter or to bespeak the protection of the first person she
meets and who thinks there can be no danger out of this house equal to
what she apprehends from me in it scruple to accept of the chariot of a
dowager accidentally offered and the lady's protection engaged by her
faithful dorcas so highly bribed to promote her escape and then mrs 
h has the air and appearance of a venerable matron and is not such a
forbidding devil as mrs sinclair 

the pretty simpleton knows nothing in the world nor that people who have
money never want assistants in their views be they what they will how
else could the princes of the earth be so implicitly served as they are 
change they hands every so often and be their purposes ever so wicked 

if i can but get her to go on with me till wednesday next week we shall
be settled together pretty quietly by that time and indeed if she has
any gratitude and has in her the least of her sex's foibles she must
think i deserve her favour by the pains she has cost me for dearly do
they all love that men should take pains about them and for them 

and here for the present i will lay down my pen and congratulate
myself upon my happy invention since her obstinacy puts me once more
upon exercising it but with this resolution i think that if the
present contrivance fail me i will exert all the faculties of my mind 
all my talents to procure for myself a regal right to her favour and
that in defiance of all my antipathies to the married state and of the
suggestions of the great devil out of the house and of his secret agents
in it since if now she is not to be prevailed upon or drawn in it
will be in vain to attempt her further 



letter xxvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday night june 20 


no admittance yet to my charmer she is very ill in a violent fever 
dorcas thinks yet will have no advice 

dorcas tells her how much i am concerned at it 

but again let me ask does this lady do right to make herself ill when
she is not ill for my own part libertine as people think me when i
had occasion to be sick i took a dose of ipecacuanha that i might not
be guilty of a falsehood and most heartily sick was i as she who
then pitied me full well knew but here to pretend to be very ill 
only to get an opportunity to run away in order to avoid forgiving a
man who has offended her how unchristian if good folks allow
themselves in these breaches of a known duty and in these presumptuous
contrivances to deceive who belford shall blame us 

i have a strange notion that the matronly lady will be certainly at the
grocer's shop at the hour of nine tomorrow morning for dorcas heard me
tell mrs sinclair that i should go out at eight precisely and then
she is to try for a coach and if the dowager's chariot should happen
to be there how lucky will it be for my charmer how strangely will my
dream be made out 


 


i have just received a letter from captain tomlinson is it not
wonderful for that was part of my dream 

i shall always have a prodigious regard to dreams henceforward i know
not but i may write a book upon that subject for my own experience
will furnish out a great part of it glanville of witches  baxter's
history of spirits and apparitions  and the royal pedant's demonology 
will be nothing at all to lovelace's reveries 

the letter is just what i dreamed it to be i am only concerned that
uncle john's anniversary did not happen three or four days sooner for
should any new misfortune befal my charmer she may not be able to
support her spirits so long as till thursday in the next week yet it
will give me the more time for new expedients should my present
contrivance fail which i cannot however suppose 


to robert lovelace esq 
monday june 19 

dear sir 

i can now return your joy for the joy you have given me as well as my
dear friend mr harlowe in the news of his beloved niece's happy
recovery for he is determined to comply with her wishes and your's 
and to give her to you with his own hand 

as the ceremony has been necessarily delayed by reason of her illness 
and as mr harlowe's birth-day is on thursday the 29th of this instant
june when he enters into the seventy-fourth year of his age and as
time may be wanted to complete the dear lady's recovery he is very
desirous that the marriage shall be solemnized upon it that he may
afterwards have double joy on that day to the end of his life 

for this purpose he intends to set out privately so as to be at
kentish-town on wednesday se'nnight in the evening 

all the family used he says to meet to celebrate it with him but as
they are at present in too unhappy a situation for that he will give
out that not being able to bear the day at home he has resolved to
be absent for two or three days 

he will set out on horseback attended only with one trusty servant 
for the greater privacy he will be at the most creditable-looking
public house there expecting you both next morning if he hear nothing
from me to prevent him and he will go to town with you after the
ceremony is performed in the coach he supposes you will come in 

he is very desirous that i should be present on the occasion but this
i have promised him at his request that i will be up before the day 
in order to see the settlements executed and every thing properly
prepared 

he is very glad you have the license ready 

he speaks very kindly of you mr lovelace and says that if any of
the family stand out after he has seen the ceremony performed he will
separate from them and unite himself to his dear niece and her
interests 

i owned to you when in town last that i took slight notice to my dear
friend of the misunderstanding between you and his niece and that i
did this for fear the lady should have shown any little discontent in
his presence had i been able to prevail upon him to go up in person 
as then was doubtful but i hope nothing of that discontent remains
now 

my absence when your messenger came must excuse me for not writing by
him 

be pleased to make my most respectful compliments acceptable to the
admirable lady and believe me to be

your most faithful and obedient servant 
antony tomlinson 


 


this letter i sealed and broke open it was brought thou mayest
suppose by a particular messenger the seal such a one as the writer
need be ashamed of i took care to inquire after the captain's health 
in my beloved's hearing and it is now ready to be produced as a
pacifier according as she shall take on or resent if the two
metamorphoses happen pursuant to my wonderful dream as having great
faith in dreams i dare say they will i think it will not be amiss 
in changing my clothes to have this letter of the worthy captain lie
in my beloved's way 



letter xxviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wedn noon june 21 


what shall i say now i who but a few hours ago had such faith in
dreams and had proposed out of hand to begin my treatise of dreams
sleeping and dreams waking and was pleasing myself with the dialogues
between the old matronal lady and the young lady and with the
metamorphoses absolutely assured that every thing would happen as my
dream chalked it out shall never more depend upon those flying follies 
those illusions of a fancy depraved and run mad 

thus confoundedly have matters happened 

i went out at eight o'clock in high good humour with myself in order
to give the sought-for opportunity to the plotting mistress and corrupted
maid only ordering will to keep a good look-out for fear his lady
should mistrust my plot or mistake a hackney-coach for the
dowager-lady's chariot but first i sent to know how she did and
receiving for answer very ill had a very bad night which latter was but
too probable since this i know that people who have plots in their heads
as seldom have as deserve good ones 

i desired a physician might be called in but was refused 

i took a walk in st james's park congratulating myself all the way on
my rare inventions then impatient i took coach with one of the
windows quite up the other almost up playing at bo-peep in every
chariot i saw pass in my way to lincoln's-inn-fields and when arrived
there i sent the coachman to desire any one of mother h s family to
come to me to the coach-side not doubting but i should have
intelligence of my fair fugitive there it being then half an hour
after ten 

a servant came who gave me to understand that the matronly lady was
just returned by herself in the chariot 

frighted out of my wits i alighted and heard from the mother's own
mouth that dorcas had engaged her to protect the lady but came to
tell her afterwards that she had changed her mind and would not quit
the house 

quite astonished not knowing what might have happened i ordered the
coachman to lash away to our mother's 

arriving here in an instant the first word i asked was if the lady
was safe 

 mr lovelace here gives a very circumstantial relation of all that
 passed between the lady and dorcas but as he could only guess at her
 motives for refusing to go off when dorcas told her that she had
 engaged for her the protection of the dowager-lady it is thought
 proper to omit this relation and to supply it by some memoranda of
 the lady's but it is first necessary to account for the occasion on
 which those memoranda were made 

the reader may remember that in the letter written to miss howe on
 her escape to hampstead she promises to give her the particulars of
 her flight at leisure she had indeed thoughts of continuing her
 account of every thing that had passed between her and mr lovelace
 since her last narrative letter but the uncertainty she was in from
 that time with the execrable treatment she met with on her being
 deluded back again followed by a week's delirium had hitherto
 hindered her from prosecuting her intention but nevertheless 
 having it still in her view to perform her promise as soon as she had
 opportunity she made minutes of every thing as it passed in order to
 help her memory which  as she observes in one place she could
 less trust to since her late disorders than before  in these
 minutes or book of memoranda she observes that having
 apprehensions that dorcas might be a traitress she would have got
 away while she was gone out to see for a coach and actually slid down
 stairs with that intent but that seeing mrs sinclair in the entry 
 whom dorcas had planted there while she went out she speeded up
 again unseen 


 see vol v letter xxi 


she then went up to the dining-room and saw the letter of captain
 tomlinson on which she observes in her memorandum-book as follows  

how am i puzzled now he might leave this letter on purpose none of
the other papers left with it being of any consequence what is the
alternative to stay and be the wife of the vilest of men how my
heart resists that to attempt to get off and fail ruin inevitable 
dorcas may betray me i doubt she is still his implement at his going
out he whispered her as i saw unobserved in a very familiar manner
too never fear sir with a courtesy 

in her agreeing to connive at my escape she provided not for her own
safety if i got away yet had reason in that case to expect his
vengeance and wants not forethought to have taken her with me was
to be in the power of her intelligence if a faithless creature let
me however though i part not with my caution keep my charity can
there be any woman so vile to a woman o yes mrs sinclair her
aunt the lord deliver me but alas i have put myself out of the
course of his protection by the natural means and am already ruined 
a father's curse likewise against me having made vain all my friends'
cautions and solicitudes i must not hope for miracles in my favour 

if i do escape what may become of me a poor helpless deserted
creature helpless from sex from circumstances exposed to every
danger lord protect me 

his vile man not gone with him lurking hereabouts no doubt to
watch my steps i will not go away by the chariot however 

that the chariot should come so opportunely so like his many
opportunities that dorcas should have the sudden thought should
have the courage with the thought to address a lady in behalf of an
absolute stranger to that lady that the lady should so readily
consent yet the transaction between them to take up so much time 
their distance in degree considered for arduous as the case was and
precious as the time dorcas was gone above half an hour yet the
chariot was said to be ready at a grocer's not many doors off 

indeed some elderly ladies are talkative and there are no doubt 
some good people in the world 

but that it should chance to be a widow lady who could do what she
pleased that dorcas should know her to be so by the lozenge persons
in her station are not usually so knowing i believe in heraldry 

yet some may for servants are fond of deriving collateral honours and
distinctions as i may call them from the quality or people of rank 
whom they serve but this sly servant not gone with him then this
letter of tomlinson 

although i am resolved never to have this wretch yet may i not throw
myself into my uncle's protection at kentish-town or highgate if i
cannot escape before and so get clear of him may not the evil i know
be less than what i may fall into if i can avoid farther villany 
farther villany he has not yet threatened freely and justly as i have
treated him i will not go i think at least unless i can send this
fellow away 


 she tried to do this but was prevented by the fellow's pretending to
put his ankle out by a slip down stairs a trick says his contriving
master in his omitted relation i had taught him on a like occasion 
at amiens 


the fellow a villain the wench i doubt a vile wench at last
concerned for her own safety plays off and on about a coach 

all my hopes of getting off at present over unhappy creature to what
farther evils art thou reserved oh how my heart rises at the necessity
i must still be under to see and converse with so very vile a man 



letter xxix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wednesday afternoon 


disappointed in her meditated escape obliged against her will to
meet me in the dining-room and perhaps apprehensive of being upbraided
for her art in feigning herself ill i expected that the dear perverse
would begin with me with spirit and indignation but i was in hopes 
from the gentleness of her natural disposition from the consideration
which i expected from her on her situation from the contents of the
letter of captain tomlinson which dorcas told me she had seen and
from the time she had had to cool and reflect since she last admitted
me to her presence that she would not have carried it so strongly
through as she did 

as i entered the dining-room i congratulated her and myself upon her
sudden recovery and would have taken her hand with an air of
respectful tenderness but she was resolved to begin where she left
off 

she turned from me drawing in her hand with a repulsing and indignant
aspect i meet you once more said she because i cannot help it what
have you to say to me why am i to be thus detained against my will 

with the utmost solemnity of speech and behaviour i urged the ceremony 
i saw i had nothing else for it i had a letter in my pocket i said 
 feeling for it although i had not taken it from the table where i left
it in the same room   the contents of which if attended to would make
us both happy i had been loth to show it to her before because i hoped
to prevail upon her to be mine sooner than the day mentioned in it 

i felt for it in all my pockets watching her eye mean time which i saw
glance towards the table where it lay 

i was uneasy that i could not find it at last directed again by her sly
eye i spied it on the table at the farther end of the room 

with joy i fetched it be pleased to read that letter madam with an
air of satisfied assurance 

she took it and cast her eye over it in such a careless way as made it
evident that she had read it before and then unthankfully tossed it
into the window-seat before her 

i urged her to bless me to-morrow or friday morning at least that she
would not render vain her uncle's journey and kind endeavours to bring
about a reconciliation among us all 

among us all repeated she with an air equally disdainful and
incredulous o lovelace thou art surely nearly allied to the grand
deceiver in thy endeavour to suit temptations to inclinations but what
honour what faith what veracity were it possible that i could enter
into parley with thee on this subject which it is not may i expect
from such a man as thou hast shown thyself to be 

i was touched to the quick a lady of your perfect character madam who
has feigned herself sick on purpose to avoid seeing the man who adored
her should not 

i know what thou wouldst say interrupted she twenty and twenty low
things that my soul would have been above being guilty of and which i
have despised myself for have i been brought into by the infection of
thy company and by the necessity thou hadst laid me under of appearing
mean but i thank god destitute as i am that i am not however sunk
so low as to wish to be thine 

i madam as the injurer ought to have patience it is for the injured
to reproach but your uncle is not in a plot against you it is to be
hoped there are circumstances in the letter you cast your eyes over 

again she interrupted me why once more i ask you am i detained in this
house do i not see myself surrounded by wretches who though they wear
the habit of my sex may yet as far as i know lie in wait for my
perdition 

she would be very loth i said that mrs sinclair and her nieces should
be called up to vindicate themselves and their house 

would but they kill me let them come and welcome i will bless the hand
that will strike the blow indeed i will 

tis idle very idle to talk of dying mere young-lady talk when
controuled by those they hate but let me beseech you dearest creature
 

beseech me nothing let me not be detained thus against my will 
unhappy creature that i am said she in a kind of phrensy wringing her
hands at the same time and turning from me her eyes lifted up thy
curse o my cruel father seems to be now in the height of its operation 
 my weakened mind is full of forebodings that i am in the way of being
a lost creature as to both worlds blessed blessed god said she 
falling on her knees save me o save me from myself and from this man 

i sunk down on my knees by her excessively affecting o that i could
recall yesterday forgive me my dearest creature forgive what is past 
as it cannot now but by one way be retrieved forgive me only on this
condition that my future faith and honour 

she interrupted me rising if you mean to beg of me never to seek to
avenge myself by law or by an appeal to my relations to my cousin
morden in particular when he comes to england 

d n the law rising also  she started   and all those to whom you talk
of appealing i defy both the one and the other all i beg is your
forgiveness and that you will on my unfeigned contrition re-establish
me in your favour 

o no no no lifting up her clasped hands i never never will never 
never can forgive you and it is a punishment worse than death to me 
that i am obliged to meet you or to see you 

this is the last time my dearest life that you will ever see me in this
posture on this occasion and again i kneeled to her let me hope that
you will be mine next thursday your uncle's birth-day if not before 
would to heaven i had never been a villain your indignation is not 
cannot be greater than my remorse and i took hold of her gown for she
was going from me 

be remorse thy portion for thine own sake be remorse thy portion i
never never will forgive thee i never never will be thine let me
retire why kneelest thou to the wretch whom thou hast so vilely humbled 

say but dearest creature you will consider say but you will take time
to reflect upon what the honour of both our families requires of you i
will not rise i will not permit you to withdraw  still holding her
gown  till you tell me you will consider take this letter weigh well
your situation and mine say you will withdraw to consider and then i
will not presume to withold  sic  you 

compulsion shall do nothing with me though a slave a prisoner in
circumstance i am no slave in my will nothing will i promise thee 
withheld compelled nothing will i promise thee 

noble creature but not implacable i hope promise me but to return in
an hour 

nothing will i promise thee 

say but that you will see me again this evening 

o that i could say that it were in my power to say i never will see
thee more would to heaven i never were to see thee more 

passionate beauty still holding her 

i speak though with vehemence the deliberate wish of my heart o that
i could avoid looking down upon thee mean groveler and abject as
insulting let me withdraw my soul is in tumults let we  sic 
withdraw 

i quitted my hold to clasp my hands together withdraw o sovereign of my
fate withdraw if you will withdraw my destiny is in your power it
depends upon your breath your scorn but augments my love your
resentment is but too well founded but dearest creature return 
return return with a resolution to bless with pardon and peace your
faithful adorer 

she flew from me the angel as soon as she found her wings flew from
me i the reptile kneeler the despicable slave no more the proud
victor arose and retiring tried to comfort myself that 
circumstanced as she is destitute of friends and fortune her uncle
moreover who is to reconcile all so soon as i thank my stars she still
believes expected 

o that she would forgive me would she but generously forgive me and
receive my vows at the altar at the instant of her forgiving me that i
might not have time to relapse into my old prejudices by my soul 
belford this dear girl gives the lie to all our rakish maxims there
must be something more than a name in virtue i now see that there is 
once subdued always subdued tis an egregious falsehood but o jack 
she never was subdued what have i obtained but an increase of shame and
confusion while her glory has been established by her sufferings 

this one merit is however left me that i have laid all her sex under
obligation to me by putting this noble creature to trials which so
gloriously supported have done honour to them all 

however but no more will i add what a force have evil habits i will
take an airing and try to fly from myself do not thou upbraid me on my
weak fits on my contradictory purposes on my irresolution and all will
be well 



letter xxx

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wednesday night 


a man is just now arrived from m hall who tells me that my lord is in
a very dangerous way the gout in his stomach to an extreme degree 
occasioned by drinking a great quantity of lemonade 

a man of 8000  a year to prefer his appetite to his health he deserves
to die but we have all of us our inordinate passions to gratify and
they generally bring their punishment along with them so
witnesses the nephew as well as the uncle 

the fellow was sent upon other business but stretched his orders a
little to make his court to a successor 

i am glad i was not at m hall at the time my lord took the grateful
dose  it was certainly grateful to him at the time   there are people
in the world who would have had the wickedness to say that i had
persuaded him to drink 

the man says that his lordship was so bad when he came away that the
family began to talk of sending for me in post haste as i know the
old peer has a good deal of cash by him of which he seldom keeps
account it behoves me to go down as soon as i can but what shall i
do with this dear creature the while to-morrow over i shall perhaps 
be able to answer my own question i am afraid she will make
me desperate 

for here have i sent to implore her company and am denied with scorn 


 


i have been so happy as to receive this moment a third letter from
the dear correspondent miss howe a little severe devil it would
have broken the heart of my beloved had it fallen into her hands i
will enclose a copy of it read it here 


tuesday june 20 

my dearest miss harlowe 

again i venture to you almost against inclination and that by your
former conveyance little as i like it 

i know not how it is with you it may be bad and then it would be hard
to upbraid you for a silence you may not be able to help but if not 
what shall i say severe enough that you have not answered either of my
last letters the first of which  and i think it imported you too much
to be silent upon it  you owned the receipt of the other which was
delivered into your own hands was so pressing for the favour of a line
from you that i am amazed i could not be obliged and still more that i
have not heard from you since 


 see vol v letter xx 
 see vol vi letter vii 


the fellow made so strange a story of the condition he saw you in and
of your speech to him that i know not what to conclude from it only 
that he is a simple blundering and yet conceited fellow who aiming
at description and the rustic wonderful gives an air of bumkinly
romance to all he tells that this is his character you will believe 
when you are informed that he described you in grief excessive yet so
improved in your person and features and so rosy that was his word 
in your face and so flush-coloured and so plump in your arms that
one would conclude you were labouring under the operation of some
malignant poison and so much the rather as he was introduced to you 
when you were upon a couch from which you offered not to rise or sit
up 


 see vol vi letter vi 


upon my word miss harlowe i am greatly distressed upon your account 
for i must be so free as to say that in your ready return with your
deceiver you have not at all answered my expectations nor acted up to
your own character for mrs townsend tells me from the women at
hampstead how cheerfully you put yourself into his hands again yet at
the time it was impossible you should be married 

lord my dear what pity it is that you took much pains to get from
the man but you know best sometimes i think it could not be you to
whom the rustic delivered my letter but it must too yet it is strange
i could not have one line by him not one and you so soon well enough
to go with the wretch back again 

i am not sure that the letter i am now writing will come to your hands 
so shall not say half that i have upon my mind to say but if you
think it worth your while to write to me pray let me know what fine
ladies his relations those were who visited you at hampstead and carried
you back again so joyfully to a place that i had so fully warned you 
but i will say no more at least till i know more for i can do nothing
but wonder and stand amazed 

notwithstanding all the man's baseness tis plain there was more than
a lurking love good heaven but i have done yet i know not how to
have done neither yet i must i will 

only account to me my dear for what i cannot at all account for and
inform me whether you are really married or not and then i shall
know whether there must or must not be a period shorter than that of
one of our lives to a friendship which has hitherto been the pride and
boast of

your
anna howe 


 


dorcas tells me that she has just now had a searching conversation as
she calls it with her lady she is willing she tells the wench still
to place her confidence in her dorcas hopes she has re-assured her but
wishes me not to depend upon it yet captain tomlinson's letter must
assuredly weigh with her 

i sent it in just now by dorcas desiring her to re-peruse it and it
was not returned me as i feared it would be and that's a good sign 
i think 

i say i think and i think for this charming creature entangled as i
am in my own inventions puzzles me ten thousand times more than i her 



letter xxxi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
thursday noon june 22 


let me perish if i know what to make either of myself or of this
surprising creature now calm now tempestuous but i know thou lovest
not anticipation any more than i 

at my repeated requests she met me at six this morning 

she was ready dressed for she had not her clothes off every since she
declared that they never more should be off in this house and
charmingly she looked with all the disadvantages of a three-hours
violent stomach-ache for dorcas told me that she had been really ill 
no rest and eyes red and swelled with weeping strange to me that those
charming fountains have not been so long ago exhausted but she is a
woman and i believe anatomists allow that women have more watry heads
than men 

well my dearest creature i hope you have now thoroughly considered of
the contents of captain tomlinson's letter but as we are thus early
met let me beseech you to make this my happy day 

she looked not favourably upon me a cloud hung upon her brow at her
entrance but as she was going to answer me a still greater solemnity
took possession of her charming features 

your air and your countenance my beloved creature are not propitious
to me let me beg of you before you speak to forbear all further
recriminations for already i have such a sense of my vileness to you 
that i know not how to bear the reproaches of my own mind 

i have been endeavouring said she since i am not permitted to avoid
you to obtain a composure which i never more expected to see you in 
how long i may enjoy it i cannot tell but i hope i shall be enabled
to speak to you without that vehemence which i expressed yesterday and
could not help it 


 the lady in her minutes says i fear dorcas is a false one may i
not be able to prevail upon him to leave me at my liberty better to
try than to trust to her if i cannot prevail but must meet him and
my uncle i hope i shall have fortitude enough to renounce him then 
but i would fain avoid qualifying with the wretch or to give him an
expectation which i intend not to answer if i am mistress of my own
resolutions my uncle himself shall not prevail with me to bind my soul
in covenant with so vile a man 


after a pause for i was all attention thus she proceeded 

it is easy for me mr lovelace to see that further violences are
intended me if i comply not with your purposes whatever they are i
will suppose them to be what you solemnly profess they are but i have
told you as solemnly my mind that i never will that i never can be
your's nor if so any man's upon earth all vengeance nevertheless 
for the wrongs you have done me i disclaim i want but to slide into
some obscure corner to hide myself from you and from every one who
once loved me the desire lately so near my heart of a reconciliation
with my friends is much abated they shall not receive me now if they
would sunk in mine own eyes i now think myself unworthy of their
favour in the anguish of my soul therefore i conjure you lovelace 
 tears in her eyes   to leave me to my fate in doing so you will give
me a pleasure the highest i now can know 

where my dearest life 

no matter where i will leave to providence when i am out of this
house the direction of my future steps i am sensible enough of my
destitute condition i know that i have not now a friend in the world 
even miss howe has given me up or you are but i would fain keep my
temper by your means i have lost them all and you have been a
barbarous enemy to me you know you have 

she paused 

i could not speak 

the evils i have suffered proceeded she  turning from me   however
irreparable are but temporarily evils leave me to my hopes of being
enabled to obtain the divine forgiveness for the offence i have been
drawn in to give to my parents and to virtue that so i may avoid the
evils that are more than temporary this is now all i have to wish
for and what is it that i demand that i have not a right to and
from which it is an illegal violence to withhold me 

it was impossible for me i told her plainly to comply 

i besought her to give me her hand as this very day i could not live
without her i communicated to her my lord's illness as a reason why
i wished not to stay for her uncle's anniversary i besought her to
bless me with her consent and after the ceremony was passed to
accompany me down to berks and thus my dearest life said i will
you be freed from a house to which you have conceived so great an
antipathy 

this thou wilt own was a princely offer and i was resolved to be as
good as my word i thought i had killed my conscience as i told thee 
belford some time ago but conscience i find though it may be
temporarily stifled cannot die and when it dare not speak aloud will
whisper and at this instant i thought i felt the revived varletess on
but a slight retrograde motion writhing round my pericardium like a
serpent and in the action of a dying one collecting all its force into
its head fix its plaguy fangs into my heart 

she hesitated and looked down as if irresolute and this set my
heart up at my mouth and believe me i had instantly popt in upon
me in imagination an old spectacled parson with a white surplice
thrown over a black habit  a fit emblem of the halcyon office which 
under a benign appearance often introduced a life of storms and
tempests   whining and snuffling through his nose the irrevocable
ceremony 

i hope now my dearest life said i snatching her hand and pressing
it to my lips that your silence bodes me good let me my beloved
creature have but your tacit consent and this moment i will step out
and engage a minister and then i promised how much my whole future
life should be devoted to her commands and that i would make her the
best and tenderest of husbands 

at last turning to me i have told you my mind mr lovelace said she 
think you that i could thus solemnly there she stopt i am too much in
your power proceeded she your prisoner rather than a person free to
choose for myself or to say what i will do or be but as a testimony
that you mean me well let me instantly quit this house and i will then
give you such an answer in writing as best befits my unhappy
circumstances 

and imaginest thou fairest thought i that this will go down with a
lovelace thou oughtest to have known that free-livers like ministers
of state never part with a power put into their hands without an
equivalent of twice the value 

i pleaded that if we joined hands this morning if not to-morrow if
not on thursday her uncle's birth-day and in his presence and
afterwards as i had proposed set out for berks we should of course 
quit this house and on our return to town should have in readiness
the house i was in treaty for 

she answered me not but with tears and sighs fond of believing what i
hoped i imputed her silence to the modesty of her sex the dear
creature thought i solemnly as she began with me is ruminating in
a sweet suspence how to put into fit words the gentle purposes of her
condescending heart but looking in her averted face with a soothing
gentleness i plainly perceived that it was resentment and not
bashfulness that was struggling in her bosom 


 the lady in her minutes owns the difficulty she lay under to keep
her temper in this conference but when i found  says she that all
my entreaties were ineffectual and that he was resolved to detain me 
i could no longer withhold my impatience 


at last she broke silence i have no patience said she to find myself
a slave a prisoner in a vile house tell me sir in so many words
tell me whether it be or be not your intention to permit me to quit
it to permit me the freedom which is my birthright as an english
subject 

will not the consequence of your departure hence be that i shall lose
you for ever madam and can i bear the thoughts of that 

she flung from me my soul disdains to hold parley with thee were her
violent words but i threw myself at her feet and took hold of her
reluctant hand and began to imprecate avow to promise but thus the
passionate beauty interrupting me went on 

i am sick of thee man one continued string of vows oaths and
protestations varied only by time and place fills thy mouth why
detainest thou me my heart rises against thee o thou cruel implement
of my brother's causeless vengeance all i beg of thee is that thou
wilt remit me the future part of my father's dreadful curse the
temporary part base and ungrateful as thou art thou hast completed 

i was speechless well i might her brother's implement james
harlowe's implement zounds jack what words were these 

i let go her struggling hand she took two or three turns cross the
room her whole haughty soul in her air then approaching me but in
silence turning from me and again to me in a milder voice i see thy
confusion lovelace or is it thy remorse i have but one request to
make thee the request so often repeated that thou wilt this moment
permit me to quit this house adieu then let me say for ever adieu 
and mayest thou enjoy that happiness in this world which thou hast
robbed me of as thou hast of every friend i have in it 

and saying this away she flung leaving me in a confusion so great that
i knew not what to think say or do 

but dorcas soon roused me do you know sir running in hastily that my
lady is gone down stairs 

no sure and down i flew and found her once more at the street-door 
contending with polly horton to get out 

she rushed by me into the fore parlour and flew to the window and
attempted once more to throw up the sash good people good people cried
she 

i caught her in my arms and lifted her from the window but being
afraid of hurting the charming creature charming in her very rage 
she slid through my arms on the floor let me die here let me die here 
were her words remaining jointless and immovable till sally and mrs 
sinclair hurried in 

she was visibly terrified at the sight of the old wretch while i
 sincerely affected appealed bear witness mrs sinclair bear
witness miss martin miss horton every one bear witness that i
offer not violence to this beloved creature 

she then found her feet o house  look towards the windows and all round
her o house   contrived on purpose for my ruin said she but let not
that woman come into my presence not that miss horton neither who would
not have dared to controul me had she not been a base one 

hoh sir hoh madam vociferated the old dragon her armed kemboed and
flourishing with one foot to the extent of her petticoats what's ado
here about nothing i never knew such work in my life between a chicken
of a gentleman and a tiger of a lady 

she was visibly affrighted and up stairs she hastened a bad woman is
certainly jack more terrible to her own sex than even a bad man 

i followed her up she rushed by her own apartment into the dining-room 
no terror can make her forget her punctilio 

to recite what passed there of invective exclamations threatenings 
even of her own life on one side of expostulations supplications and
sometimes menaces on the other would be too affecting and after my
particularity in like scenes these things may as well be imagined as
expressed 

i will therefore only mention that at length i extorted a concession
from her she had reason to think it would have been worse for her on
the spot if she had not made it it was that she would endeavour to
make herself easy till she saw what next thursday her uncle's birth-day 
would produce but oh that it were not a sin she passionately
exclaimed on making this poor concession to put and end to her own life 
rather than yield to give me but that assurance 


 the lady mentions in her memorandum-book that she had no other way 
as is apprehended to save herself from instant dishonour but by making
this concession her only hope now she says if she cannot escape by
dorcas's connivance whom nevertheless she suspects is to find a way
to engage the protection of her uncle and even of the civil magistrate 
on thursday next if necessary he shall see  says she tame and
timid as he thought me what i dare to do to avoid so hated a
compulsion and a man capable of a baseness so premeditatedly vile and
inhuman 


this however shows me that she is aware that the reluctantly-given
assurance may be fairly construed into a matrimonial expectation on my
side and if she will now even now look forward i think from my
heart that i will put on her livery and wear it for life 

what a situation am i in with all my cursed inventions i am puzzled 
confounded and ashamed of myself upon the whole to take such pains to
be a villain but for the fiftieth time let me ask thee who would
have thought that there had been such a woman in the world 
nevertheless she had best take care that she carries not her obstinacy
much farther she knows not what revenge for slighted love will make me
do 

the busy scenes i have just passed through have given emotions to my
heart which will not be quieted one while my heart i see 
 on re-perusing what i have written has communicated its tremors to my
fingers and in some places the characters are so indistinct and
unformed that thou'lt hardly be able to make them out but if one half
of them is only intelligible that will be enough to expose me to thy
contempt for the wretched hand i have made of my plots and contrivances 
 but surely jack i have gained some ground by this promise 

and now one word to the assurances thou sendest me that thou hast not
betrayed my secrets in relation to this charming creature thou mightest
have spared them belford my suspicions held no longer than while i
wrote about them for well i knew when i allowed myself time to think 
that thou hadst no principles no virtue to be misled by a great deal
of strong envy and a little of weak pity i knew to be thy motives 
thou couldst not provoke my anger and my compassion thou ever hadst and
art now more especially entitled to it because thou art a pityful
fellow 

all thy new expostulations in my beloved's behalf i will answer when i
see thee 



letter xxxii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
thursday night 


confoundedly out of humour with this perverse woman nor wilt thou blame
me if thou art my friend she regards the concession she made as a
concession extorted from her and we are but just where we were before
she made it 

with great difficulty i prevailed upon her to favour me with her company
for one half hour this evening the necessity i was under to go down to
m hall was the subject i wanted to talk upon 

i told her that as she had been so good as to promise that she would
endeavour to make herself easy till she saw the thursday in next week
over i hoped that she would not scruple to oblige me with her word that
i should find her here at my return from m hall 

indeed she would make no such promise nothing of this house was
mentioned to me said she you know it was not and do you think that i
would have given my consent to my imprisonment in it 

i was plaguily nettled and disappointed too if i go not down to mr 
hall madam you'll have no scruple to stay here i suppose till
thursday is over 

if i cannot help myself i must but i insist upon being permitted to go
out of this house whether you leave it or not 

well madam then i will comply with your commands and i will go out
this very evening in quest of lodgings that you shall have no objections
to 

i will have no lodgings of your providing sir i will go to mrs 
moore's at hampstead 

mrs moore's madam i have no objection to mrs moore's but will you
give me your promise to admit me there to your presence 

as i do here when i cannot help it 

very well madam will you be so good as to let me know what you intend
by your promise to make yourself easy 

to endeavour sir to make myself easy were the words 

till you saw what next thursday would produce 

ask me no questions that may ensnare me i am too sincere for the
company i am in 

let me ask you madam what meant you when you said that were it
not a sin you would die before you gave me that assurance 

she was indignantly silent 

you thought madam you had given me room to hope your pardon by it 

when i think i ought to answer you with patience i will speak 

do you think yourself in my power madam 

if i were not and there she stopt 

dearest creature speak out i beseech you dearest creature speak out
 

she was silent her charming face all in a glow 

have you madam any reliance upon my honour 

still silent 

you hate me madam you despise me more than you do the most odious of
god's creatures 

you ought to despise me if i did not 

you say madam you are in a bad house you have no reliance upon my
honour you believe you cannot avoid me 

she arose i beseech you let me withdraw 

i snatched her hand rising and pressed it first to my lips and then to
my heart in wild disorder she might have felt the bounding mischief
ready to burst its bars you shall go to your own apartment if you
please but by the great god of heaven i will accompany you thither 

she trembled pray pray mr lovelace don't terrify me so 

be seated madam i beseech you be seated 

i will sit down 

do then all my soul is in my eyes and my heart's blood throbbing at my
fingers' ends 

i will i will you hurt me pray mr lovelace don't don't frighten me
so and down she sat trembling my hand still grasping her's 

i hung over her throbbing bosom and putting my other arm round her waist
 and you say you hate me madam and you say you despise me and you
say you promise me nothing 

yes yes i did promise you let me not be held down thus you see i sat
down when you bid me why  struggling  need you hold me down thus i did
promise to endeavour to be easy till thursday was over but you won't
let me how can i be easy pray let me not be thus terrified 

and what madam meant you by your promise did you mean any thing in my
favour you designed that i should at that time think you did did
you mean any thing in my favour madam did you intend that i should
think you did 

let go my hand sir take away your arm from about me  struggling yet
trembling   why do you gaze upon me so 

answer me madam did you mean any thing in my favour by your promise 

let me be not thus constrained to answer 

then pausing and gaining more spirit let me go said she i am but a
woman but a weak woman 

but my life is in my own power though my person is not i will not be
thus constrained 

you shall not madam quitting her hand bowing but my heart is at my
mouth and hoping farther provocation 

she arose and was hurrying away 

i pursue you not madam i will try your generosity stop return this
moment stop return if madam you would not make me desperate 

she stopt at the door burst into tears o lovelace how how have i
deserved 

be pleased dearest angel to return 

she came back but with declared reluctance and imputing her compliance
to terror 

terror jack as i have heretofore found out though i have so little
benefited by the discovery must be my resort if she make it necessary 
nothing else will do with the inflexible charmer 

she seated herself over-against me extremely discomposed but
indignation had a visible predominance in her features 

i was going towards her with a countenance intendedly changed to love
and softness sweetest dearest angel were my words in the tenderest
accent but rising up she insisted upon my being seated at a distance
from her 

i obeyed and begged her hand over the table to my extended hand 
to see if in any thing she would oblige me but nothing gentle soft 
or affectionate would do she refused me her hand was she wise jack 
to confirm to me that nothing but terror would do 

let me only know madam if your promise to endeavour to wait with
patience the event of next thursday meant me favour 

do you expect any voluntary favour from one to whom you give not a free
choice 

do you intend madam to honour me with your hand in your uncle's
presence or do you not 

my heart and my hand shall never be separated why think you did i
stand in opposition to the will of my best my natural friends 

i know what you mean madam am i then as hateful to you as the vile
solmes 

ask me not such a question mr lovelace 

i must be answered am i as hateful to you as the vile solmes 

why do you call mr solmes vile 

don't you think him so madam 

why should i did mr solmes ever do vilely by me 

dearest creature don't distract me by hateful comparisons and perhaps
by a more hateful preference 

don't you sir put questions to me that you know i will answer truly 
though my answer were ever so much to enrage you 

my heart madam my soul is all your's at present but you must give me
hope that your promise in your own construction binds you no new
cause to the contrary to be mine on thursday how else can i leave you 

let me go to hampstead and trust to my favour 

may i trust to it say only may i trust to it 

how will you trust to it if you extort an answer to this question 

say only dearest creature say only may i trust to your favour if you
go to hampstead 

how dare you sir if i must speak out expect a promise of favour from
me what a mean creature must you think me after the ungrateful
baseness to me were i to give you such a promise 

then standing up thou hast made me o vilest of men  her hands clasped 
and a face crimsoned with indignation   an inmate of the vilest of houses
 nevertheless while i am in it i shall have a heart incapable of any
thing but abhorrence of that and of thee 

and round her looked the angel and upon me with fear in her sweet
aspect of the consequence of her free declaration but what a devil must
i have been i who love bravery in a man had i not been more struck with
admiration of her fortitude at the instant than stimulated by revenge 

noblest of creatures and do you think i can leave you and my interest
in such an excellence precarious no promise no hope if you make me
not desperate may lightning blast me if i do you not all the justice
tis in my power to do you 

if you have any intention to oblige me leave me at my own liberty and
let me not be detained in this abominable house to be constrained as i
have been constrained to be stopt by your vile agents to be brought up
by force and be bruised in my own defence against such illegal violence 
 i dare to die lovelace and she who fears not death is not to be
intimidated into a meanness unworthy of her heart and principles 

wonderful creature but why madam did you lead me to hope for
something favourable for next thursday once more make me not desperate
 with all your magnanimity glorious creature  i was more than half
frantic belford   you may you may but do not do not make me brutally
threaten you do not do not make me desperate 

my aspect i believe threatened still more than my words i was rising
 she rose mr lovelace be pacified you are even more dreadful than
the lovelace i have long dreaded let me retire i ask your leave to
retire you really frighten me yet i give you no hope from my heart i
ab 

say not madam you abhor me you must for your own sake conceal your
hatred at least not avow it i seized her hand 

let me retire let me retire said she in a manner out of breath 

i will only say madam that i refer myself to your generosity my heart
is not to be trusted at this instant as a mark of my submission to your
will you shall if you please withdraw but i will not go to m hall 
live or die my lord m i will not go to m hall but will attend the
effect of your promise remember madam you have promised to endeavour
to make yourself easy till you see the event of next thursday next
thursday remember your uncle comes up to see us married that's the
event you think ill of your lovelace do not madam suffer your own
morals to be degraded by the infection as you called it of his example 

away flew the charmer with this half permission and no doubt thought that
she had an escape nor without reason 

i knew not for half an hour what to do with myself vexed at the heart 
nevertheless now she was from me and when i reflected upon her hatred
of me and her defiances that i suffered myself to be so overawed 
checked restrained 

and now i have written thus far have of course recollected the whole of
our conversation i am more and more incensed against myself 

but i will go down to these women and perhaps suffer myself to be
laughed at by them 

devil fetch them they pretend to know their own sex sally was a woman
well educated polly also both have read both have sense of parentage
not mean once modest both still they say had been modest but for me
 not entirely indelicate now though too little nice for my personal
intimacy loth as they both are to have me think so the old one too a
woman of family though thus from bad inclination as well as at first
from low circumstances miserably sunk and hence they all pretend to
remember what once they were and vouch for the inclinations and
hypocrisy of the whole sex and wish for nothing so ardently as that i
will leave the perverse lady to their management while i am gone to
berkshire undertaking absolutely for her humility and passiveness on my
return and continually boasting of the many perverse creatures whom they
have obliged to draw in their traces 


 


i am just come from the sorceresses 

i was forced to take the mother down for she began with her hoh sir 
with me and to catechize and upbraid me with as much insolence as if i
owed her money 

i made her fly the pit at last strange wishes wished we against each
other at her quitting it what were they i'll tell thee she wished
me married and to be jealous of my wife and my heir-apparent the child
of another man i was even with her with a vengeance and yet thou wilt
think that could not well be as how as how jack why i wished for
her conscience come to life and i know by the gripes mine gives me
every half-hour that she would then have a cursed time of it 

sally and polly gave themselves high airs too their first favours were
thrown at me  women to boast of those favours which they were as willing
to impart first forms all the difficulty with them as i to receive   i
was upbraided with ingratitude dastardice and all my difficulties with
my angel charged upon myself for want of following my blows and for
leaving the proud lady mistress of her own will and nothing to reproach
herself with and all agreed that the arts used against her on a
certain occasion had too high an operation for them or me to judge what
her will would have been in the arduous trial and then they blamed one
another as i cursed them all 

they concluded that i should certainly marry and be a lost man and
sally on this occasion with an affected and malicious laugh snapt her
fingers at me and pointing two of each hand forkedly at me bid me
remember the lines i once showed her of my favourite jack dryden as she
always familiarly calls that celebrated poet 

 we women to new joys unseen may move 
 there are no prints left in the paths of love 
 all goods besides by public marks are known 
 but those men most desire to keep have none 

this infernal implement had the confidence further to hint that when a
wife some other man would not find half the difficulty with my angel
that i had found confidence indeed but yet i must say if a man
gives himself up to the company of these devils they never let him rest
till he either suspects or hate his wife 

but a word or two of other matters if possible 

methinks i long to know how causes go at m hall i have another private
intimation that the old peer is in the greatest danger 

i must go down yet what to do with this lady the mean while these
cursed women are full of cruelty and enterprise she will never be easy
with them in my absence they will have provocation and pretence
therefore but woe be to them if 

yet what will vengeance do after an insult committed the two nymphs
will have jealous rage to goad them on and what will withhold a jealous
and already-ruined woman 

to let her go elsewhere that cannot be done i am still too resolved to
be honest if she'll give me hope if yet she'll let me be honest but
i'll see how she'll be after the contention she will certainly have
between her resentment and the terror she has reason for from our last
conversation so let this subject rest till the morning and to the old
peer once more 

i shall have a good deal of trouble i reckon though no sordid man to
be decent on the expected occasion then how to act i who am no
hypocrite in the days of condolement what farces have i to go through 
and to be the principal actor in them i'll try to think of my own
latter end a gray beard and a graceless heir in order to make me
serious 

thou belford knowest a good deal of this sort of grimace and canst
help a gay heart to a little of the dismal but then every feature of
thy face is cut out for it my heart may be touched perhaps sooner
than thine for believe me or not i have a very tender one but then 
no man looking into my face be the occasion for grief ever so great 
will believe that heart to be deeply distressed 

all is placid easy serene in my countenance sorrow cannot sit half
an hour together upon it nay i believe that lord m s recovery 
should it happen would not affect me above a quarter of an hour only
the new scenery and the pleasure of aping an heraclitus to the family 
while i am a democritus among my private friends or i want nothing that
the old peer can leave me wherefore then should grief sadden and
distort such blythe such jocund features as mine 

but as for thine were there murder committed in the street and thou
wert but passing by the murderer even in sight the pursuers would
quit him and lay hold of thee and thy very looks would hang as well
as apprehend thee 

but one word to business jack whom dealest thou with for thy blacks 
wert thou well used i shall want a plaguy parcel of them for i intend
to make every soul of the family mourn outside if not in 



letter xxxiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
june 23 friday morning 


i went out early this morning on a design that i know not yet whether
i shall or shall not pursue and on my return found simon parsons my
lord's berkshire bailiff just before arrived waiting for me with a
message in form sent by all the family to press me to go down and
that at my lord's particular desire who wants to see me before he
dies 

simon has brought my lord's chariot-and-six  perhaps my own by this
time   to carry me down i have ordered it to be in readiness by four
to-morrow morning the cattle shall smoke for the delay and by the
rest they'll have in the interim will be better able to bear it 

i am still resolved upon matrimony if my fair perverse will accept of
me but if she will not why then i must give an uninterrupted
hearing not to my conscience but to these women below 

dorcas had acquainted her lady with simon's arrival and errand my
beloved had desired to see him but my coming in prevented his
attendance on her just as dorcas was instructing him what questions he
should not answer to that might be asked of him 

i am to be admitted to her presence immediately at my repeated
request surely the acquisition in view will help me to make up all
with her she is just gone up to the dining-room 


 


nothing will do jack i can procure no favour from her though she
has obtained from me the point which she had set her heart upon 

i will give thee a brief account of what passed between us 

i first proposed instant marriage and this in the most fervent manner 
but was denied as fervently 

would she be pleased to assure me that she would stay here only till
tuesday morning i would but just go down to see how my lord was to
know whether he had any thing particular to say or enjoin me while yet
he was sensible as he was very earnest to see me perhaps i might be up
on sunday concede in something i beseech you madam show me some
little consideration 

why mr lovelace must i be determined by your motions think you that
i will voluntarily give a sanction to the imprisonment of my person of
what importance to me ought to be your stay or your return 

give a sanction to the imprisonment of your person do you think madam 
that i fear the law 

i might have spared this foolish question of defiance but my pride would
not let me i thought she threatened me jack 

i don't think you fear the law sir you are too brave to have any
regard either to moral or divine sanctions 

tis well madam but ask me any thing i can do to oblige you and i
will oblige you though in nothing will you oblige me 

then i ask you then i request of you to let me go to hampstead 

i paused and at last by my soul you shall this very moment i will
wait upon you and see you fixed there if you'll promise me your hand
on thursday in presence of your uncle 

i want not you to see me fixed i will promise nothing 

take care madam that you don't let me see that i can have no reliance
upon your future favour 

i have been used to be threatened by you sir but i will accept of your
company to hampstead i will be ready to go in a quarter of an hour my
clothes may be sent after me 

you know the condition madam next thursday 

you dare not trust 

my infinite demerits tell me that i ought not nevertheless i will
confide in your generosity to-morrow morning no new cause arising to
give reason to the contrary as early as you please you may go to
hampstead 

this seemed to oblige her but yet she looked with a face of doubt 

i will go down to the women belford and having no better judges at
hand will hear what they say upon my critical situation with this
proud beauty who has so insolently rejected a lovelace kneeling at her
feet though making an earnest tender of himself for a husband in spite
of all his prejudices to the state of shackles 



letter xxxiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


just come from the women 

have i gone so far and am i afraid to go farther have i not already 
as it is evident by her behaviour sinned beyond forgiveness a woman's
tears used to be to me but as water sprinkled on a glowing fire which
gives it a fiercer and brighter blaze what defence has this lady but her
tears and her eloquence she was before taken at no weak advantage she
was insensible in her moments of trial had she been sensible she must
have been sensible so they say the methods taken with her have
augmented her glory and her pride she has now a tale to tell that she
may tell with honour to herself no accomplice-inclination she can
look me into confusion without being conscious of so much as a thought
which she need to be ashamed of 

this jack is the substance of the women's reasonings with me 

to which let me add that the dear creature now sees the necessity i am
in to leave her detecting me is in her head my contrivances are of
such a nature that i must appear to be the most odious of men if i am
detected on this side matrimony and yet i have promised as thou seest 
that she shall set out to hampstead as soon as she pleases in the
morning and that without condition on her side 

dost thou ask what i meant by this promise 

no new cause arising was the proviso on my side thou'lt remember 
but there will be a new cause 

suppose dorcas should drop the promissory note given her by her lady 
servants especially those who cannot read or write are the most
careless people in the world of written papers suppose i take it up 
at a time too that i was determined that the dear creature should be
her own mistress will not this detection be a new cause a cause that
will carry with it against her the appearance of ingratitude 

that she designed it a secret to me argues a fear of detection and
indirectly a sense of guilt i wanted a pretence can i have a better 
 if i am in a violent passion upon the detection is not passion an
universally-allowed extenuator of violence is not every man and woman
obliged to excuse that fault in another which at times they find
attended with such ungovernable effects in themselves 

the mother and sisterhood suppose brought to sit in judgment upon the
vile corrupted the least benefit that must accrue from the accidental
discovery if not a pretence for perpetration  which however may be
the case   an excuse for renewing my orders for her detention till my
return from m hall  the fault her own   and for keeping a stricter
watch over her than before with direction to send me any letters that
may be written by her or to her and when i return the devil's in it
if i find not a way to make her choose lodgings for herself since
these are so hateful to her that shall answer all my purposes and
yet i no more appear to direct her choice than i did before in these 

thou wilt curse me when thou comest to this place i know thou wilt 
but thinkest thou that after such a series of contrivance i will lose
this inimitable woman for want of a little more a rake's a rake jack 
 and what rake is withheld by principle from the perpetration of any
evil his heart is set upon and in which he thinks he can succeed 
besides am i not in earnest as to marriage will not the generality of
the world acquit me if i do marry and what is that injury which a
church-rite will not at any time repair is not the catastrophe of every
story that ends in wedlock accounted happy be the difficulties in the
progress of it ever so great 

but here how am i engrossed by this lady while poor lord m as simon
tells me lies groaning in the most dreadful agonies what must he
suffer heaven relieve him i have a too compassionate heart and so
would the dear creature have found could i have thought that the worst
of her sufferings is equal to the lightest of his i mean as to fact 
for as to that part of her's which arises from extreme sensibility i
know nothing of that and cannot therefore be answerable for it 



letter xxxv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


just come from my charmer she will not suffer me to say half the
obliging the tender things which my honest heart is ready to overflow
with a confounded situation that when a man finds himself in humour
to be eloquent and pathetic at the same time yet cannot engage the
mistress of his fate to lend an ear to his fine speeches 

i can account now how it comes about that lovers when their mistresses
are cruel run into solitude and disburthen their minds to stocks and
stones for am i not forced to make my complaints to thee 

she claimed the performance of my promise the moment she saw me of
permitting her  haughtily she spoke the word  to go to hampstead as soon
as i was gone to berks 

most cheerfully i renewed it 

she desired me to give orders in her hearing 

i sent for dorcas and will they came do you both take notice but 
perhaps sir i may take you with me that your lady is to be obeyed in
all her commands she purposes to return to hampstead as soon as i am
gone my dear will you not have a servant to attend you 

i shall want no servant there 

will you take dorcas 

if i should want dorcas i can send for her 

dorcas could not but say she should be very proud 

well well that may be at my return if your lady permit shall i my
dear call up mrs sinclair and give her orders to the same effect in
your hearing 

i desire not to see mrs sinclair nor any that belong to her 

as you please madam 

and then the servants being withdrawn i urged her again for the
assurance that she would meet me at the altar on thursday next but to
no purpose may she not thank herself for all that may follow 

one favour however i would not be denied to be admitted to pass the
evening with her 

all sweetness and obsequiousness will i be on this occasion my whole
soul shall be poured out to move her to forgive me if she will not and
if the promissory note should fall in my way my revenge will doubtless
take total possession of me 

all the house in my interest and every one in it not only engaging to
intimidate and assist as occasion shall offer but staking all their
experience upon my success if it be not my own fault what must be the
consequence 

this jack however shall be her last trial and if she behave as nobly
in and after this second attempt all her senses about her as she has
done after the first she will come out an angel upon full proof in
spite of man woman and devil then shall there be an end of all her
sufferings i will then renounce that vanquished devil and reform and
if any vile machination start up presuming to mislead me i will sooner
stab it in my heart as it rises than give way to it 

a few hours will now decide all but whatever be the event i shall be
too busy to write again till i get to m hall 

mean time i am in strange agitations i must suppress them if
possible before i venture into her presence my heart bounces my bosom
from the table i will lay down my pen and wholly resign to its
impulses 



letter xxxvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
friday night or rather sat morn one o'clock 


i thought i should not have had either time or inclination to write
another line before i got to m hall but having the first must find
the last since i can neither sleep nor do any thing but write if i can
do that i am most confoundedly out of humour the reason let it
follow if it will follow nor preparation for it from me 

i tried by gentleness and love to soften what marble a heart
incapable either of love or gentleness her past injuries for ever in
her head ready to receive a favour the permission to go to
hampstead but neither to deserve it nor return any so my scheme of
the gentle kind was soon given over 

i then wanted to provoke her like a coward boy who waits for the first
blow before he can persuade himself to fight i half challenged her to
challenge or defy me she seemed aware of her danger and would not
directly brave my resentment but kept such a middle course that i
neither could find a pretence to offend nor reason to hope yet she
believed my tale that her uncle would come to kentish-town and seemed
not to apprehend that tomlinson was an impostor 

she was very uneasy upon the whole in my company wanted often to
break from me yet so held me to my purpose of permitting her to go to
hampstead that i knew not how to get off it although it was impossible 
in my precarious situation with her to think of performing
it 

in this situation the women ready to assist and if i proceeded not 
as ready to ridicule me what had i left me but to pursue the concerted
scheme and to seek a pretence to quarrel with her in order to revoke my
promised permission and to convince her that i would not be upbraided as
the most brutal of ravishers for nothing 

i had agreed with the women that if i could not find a pretence in her
presence to begin my operations the note should lie in my way and i was
to pick it up soon after her retiring from me but i began to doubt at
near ten o'clock so earnest was she to leave me suspecting my
over-warm behaviour to her and eager grasping of her hand two or three
times with eye-strings as i felt on the strain while her eyes showed
uneasiness and apprehension that if she actually retired for the night 
it might be a chance whether it would be easy to come at her again loth 
therefore to run such a risk i stept out a little after ten with intent
to alter the preconcerted disposition a little saying i would attend her
again instantly but as i returned i met her at the door intending to
withdraw for the night i could not persuade her to go back nor had i
presence of mind so full of complaisance as i was to her just before to
stay her by force so she slid through my hands into her own apartment i
had nothing to do therefore but to let my former concert take place 

i should have promised but care not for order of time connection or
any thing else that between eight and nine in the evening another
servant of lord m on horseback came to desire me to carry down with me
dr s the old peer having been once in extremis as they judge he is
now relieved and reprieved by him i sent and engaged the doctor to
accompany me down and am to call upon him by four this morning or the
devil should have both my lord and the doctor if i'd stir till i got all
made up 

poke thy damn'd nose forward into the event if thou wilt curse me if
thou shalt have it till its proper time and place and too soon then 

she had hardly got into her chamber but i found a little paper as i was
going into mine which i took up and opening it for it was carefully
pinned in another paper what should it be but a promissory note given
as a bribe with a further promise of a diamond ring to induce dorcas to
favour her mistress's escape 

how my temper changed in a moment ring ring ring ring i my bell 
with a violence enough to break the string and as if the house were on
fire 

every devil frighted into active life the whole house in an uproar up
runs will sir sir sir eyes goggling mouth distended bid the
damn'd toad dorcas come hither as i stood at the stair-head in a
horrible rage and out of breath cried i 

in sight came the trembling devil but standing aloof from the report
made her by will of the passion i was in as well as from what she had
heard 

flash came out my sword immediately for i had it ready on cursed 
confounded villanous bribery and corruption 

up runs she to her lady's door screaming out for safety and protection 

good your honour interposed will for god's sake o lord o lord 
receiving a good cuff 

take that varlet for saving the ungrateful wretch from my vengeance 

wretch i intended to say but if it were some other word of like
ending passion must be my excuse 

up ran two or three of the sisterhood what's the matter what's the
matter 

the matter for still my beloved opened not the door on the contrary 
drew another bolt this abominable dorcas call her aunt up let her
see what a traitress she has placed about me and let her bring the toad
to answer for herself has taken a bribe a provision for life to
betray her trust by that means to perpetuate a quarrel between a man and
his wife and frustrate for ever all hopes of reconciliation between us 

let me perish belford if i have patience to proceed with the farce 


 


if i must resume i must 

up came the aunt puffing and blowing as she hoped for mercy she was
not privy to it she never knew such a plotting perverse lady in her
life well might servants be at the pass they were when such ladies as
mrs lovelace made no conscience of corrupting them for her part she
desired no mercy for the wretch no niece of her's if she were not
faithful to her trust but what was the proof 

she was shown the paper 

but too evident cursed cursed toad devil jade passed from each
mouth and the vileness of the corrupted and the unworthiness of the
corruptress were inveighed against 

up we all went passing the lady's door into the dining-room to proceed
to trial 

stamp stamp stamp up each on her heels rave rave rave every tongue
 

bring up the creature before us all this instant 

and would she have got out of the house say you 

these the noises and the speeches as we clattered by the door of the fair
bribress 

up was brought dorcas whimpering between two both bawling out you
must go you shall go tis fit you should answer for yourself you are a
discredit to all worthy servants as they pulled and pushed her up
stairs she whining i cannot see his honour i cannot look so good and
so generous a gentleman in the face o how shall i bear my aunt's
ravings 

come up and be d n'd bring her forward her imperial judge what a
plague it is the detection not the crime that confounds you you
could be quiet enough for days together as i see by the date under the
villany tell me ungrateful devil tell me who made the first advances 

ay disgrace to my family and blood cried the old one tell his honour 
tell the truth who made the first advances 

ay cursed creature cried sally who made the first advances 

i have betrayed one trust already o let me not betray another my lady
is a good lady o let not her suffer 

tell all you know tell the whole truth dorcas cried polly horton 
his honour loves his lady too well to make her suffer much little as she
requites his love 

every body sees that cried sally too well indeed for his honour i
was going to say 

till now i thought she deserved my love but to bribe a servant thus 
who she supposed had orders to watch her steps for fear of another
elopement and to impute that precaution to me as a crime yet i must
love her ladies forgive my weakness 

curse upon my grimaces if i have patience to repeat them but thou
shalt have it all thou canst not despise me more than i despise myself 


 


but suppose sir said sally you have my lady and the wench face to
face you see she cares not to confess 

o my carelessness cried dorcas don't let my poor lady suffer indeed 
if you all knew what i know you would say her ladyship has been cruelly
treated 

see see see see repeatedly every one at once only sorry for the
detection as your honour said not for the fault 

cursed creature and devilish creature from every mouth 

your lady won't she dare not come out to save you cried sally though
it is more his honour's mercy than your desert if he does not cut your
vile throat this instant 

say repeated polly was it your lady that made the first advances or
was it you you creature 

if the lady had so much honour bawled the mother excuse me so excuse
me sir  confound the old wretch she had like to have said son   if
the lady has so much honour as we have supposed she will appear to
vindicate a poor servant misled as she has been by such large
promises but i hope sir you will do them both justice i hope you
will good lack good lack clapping her hands together to grant her
every thing she could ask to indulge her in her unworthy hatred to my
poor innocent house to let her go to hampstead though your honour told
us you could get no condescension from her no not the least o sir o
sir i hope i hope if your lady will not come out i hope you will find
a way to hear this cause in her presence i value not my doors on such
an occasion as this justice i ever loved i desire you will come to
the bottom of it in clearance to me i'll be sworn i had no privity in
this black corruption 

just then we heard the lady's door unbar unlock unbolt 

now sir 

now mr lovelace 

now sir from every encouraging mouth 

but o jack jack jack i can write no more 


 


if you must have it all you must 

now belford see us all sitting in judgment resolved to punish the fair
bribress i and the mother the hitherto dreaded mother the nieces
sally polly the traitress dorcas and mabell a guard as it were over
dorcas that she might not run away and hide herself all
pre-determined and of necessity pre-determined from the journey i was
going to take and my precarious situation with her and hear her unbolt 
unlock unbar the door then as it proved afterwards put the key into
the lock on the outside lock the door and put it in her pocket will i
knew below who would give me notice if while we were all above she
should mistake her way and go down stairs instead of coming into the
dining-room the street-door also doubly secured and every shutter to the
windows round the house fastened that no noise or screaming should be
heard  such was the brutal preparation  and then hear her step towards
us and instantly see her enter among us confiding in her own innocence 
and with a majesty in her person and manner that is natural to her but
which then shone out in all its glory every tongue silent every eye
awed every heart quaking mine in a particular manner sunk throbless 
and twice below its usual region to once at my throat a shameful
recreant she silent too looking round her first on me then on the
mother no longer fearing her then on sally polly and the culprit
dorcas such the glorious power of innocence exerted at that awful
moment 

she would have spoken but could not looking down my guilt into
confusion a mouse might have been heard passing over the floor her own
light feet and rustling silks could not have prevented it for she seemed
to tread air and to be all soul she passed backwards and forwards now
towards me now towards the door several times before speech could get
the better of indignation and at last after twice or thrice hemming to
recover her articulate voice o thou contemptible and abandoned
lovelace thinkest thou that i see not through this poor villanous plot
of thine and of these thy wicked accomplices 

thou woman  looking at the mother  once my terror always my dislike 
but now my detestation shouldst once more for thine perhaps was the
preparation have provided for me intoxicating potions to rob me of my
senses 

and then thus wretch  turning to me   mightest thou more securely
have depended upon such a low contrivance as this 

and ye vile women who perhaps have been the ruin body and soul of
hundreds of innocents you show me how in full assembly know that i
am not married ruined as i am by your help i bless god i am not
married to this miscreant and i have friends that will demand my honour
at your hands and to whose authority i will apply for none has this
man over me look to it then what farther insults you offer me or
incite him to offer me i am a person though thus vilely betrayed of
rank and fortune i never will be his and to your utter ruin will
find friends to pursue you and now i have this full proof of your
detestable wickedness and have heard your base incitements will have
no mercy upon you 

they could not laugh at the poor figure i made lord how every devil 
conscience-shaken trembled 

what a dejection must ever fall to the lot of guilt were it given to
innocence always thus to exert itself 

and as for thee thou vile dorcas thou double deceiver whining out
thy pretended love for me begone wretch nobody will hurt thee 
begone i say thou has too well acted thy part to be blamed by any here
but myself thou art safe thy guilt is thy security in such a house as
this thy shameful thy poor part thou hast as well acted as the low
farce could give thee to act as well as they each of them thy
superiors though not thy betters thou seest can act theirs steal
away into darkness no inquiry after this will be made whose the first
advances thine or mine 

and as i hope to live the wench confoundedly frightened slunk away 
so did her sentinel mabell though i endeavouring to rally cried out
for dorcas to stay but i believe the devil could not have stopt her 
when an angel bid her begone 

madam said i let me tell you and was advancing towards her with a
fierce aspect most cursedly vexed and ashamed too 

but she turned to me stop where thou art o vilest and most abandoned
of men stop where thou art nor with that determined face offer to
touch me if thou wouldst not that i should be a corps at thy feet 

to my astonishment she held forth a penknife in her hand the point to
her own bosom grasping resolutely the whole handle so that there was no
offering to take it from her 

i offer not mischief to any body but myself you sir and ye women 
are safe from every violence of mine the law shall be all my resource 
the law  and she spoke the word with emphasis the law that to such
people carries natural terror with it and now struck a panic into them 

no wonder since those who will damn themselves to procure ease and
plenty in this world will tremble at every thing that seems to threaten
their methods of obtaining that ease and plenty 

the law only shall be my refuge  

the infamous mother whispered me that it were better to make terms with
this strange lady and let her go 

sally notwithstanding all her impudent bravery at other times said if
mr lovelace had told them what was not true of her being his wife 

and polly horton that she must needs say the lady if she were not my
wife had been very much injured that was all 

that is not now a matter to be disputed cried i you and i know madam
 

we do said she and i thank god i am not thine once more i thank god
for it i have no doubt of the farther baseness that thou hast intended
me by this vile and low trick but i have my senses lovelace and from
my heart i despise thee thou very poor lovelace how canst thou stand
in my presence thou that' 

madam madam madam these are insults not to be borne and was
approaching her 

she withdrew to the door and set her back against it holding the
pointed knife to her heaving bosom while the women held me beseeching
me not to provoke the violent lady for their house sake and be curs'd
to them they besought me and all three hung upon me while the truly
heroic lady braved me at that distance 

approach me lovelace with resentment if thou wilt i dare die it
is in defence of my honour god will be merciful to my poor soul i
expect no more mercy from thee i have gained this distance and two
steps nearer me and thou shalt see what i dare do  

leave me women to myself and to my angel  they retired at a
distance   o my beloved creature how you terrify me holding out my
arms and kneeling on one knee not a step not a step farther except to
receive my death at that injured hand which is thus held up against a
life far dearer to me than my own i am a villain the blackest of
villains say you will sheath your knife in the injurer's not the
injured's heart and then will i indeed approach you but not else 

the mother twanged her d n'd nose and sally and polly pulled out their
handkerchiefs and turned from us they never in their lives they told
me afterwards beheld such a scene 

innocence so triumphant villany so debased they must mean 

unawares to myself i had moved onward to my angel and dost thou dost
thou still disclaiming still advancing dost thou dost thou still
insidiously move towards me   and her hand was extended  i dare i
dare not rashly neither my heart from principle abhors the act which
thou makest necessary god in thy mercy  lifting up her eyes and
hands  god in thy mercy 

i threw myself to the farther end of the room an ejaculation a silent
ejaculation employing her thoughts that moment polly says the whites of
her lovely eyes were only visible and in the instant that she extended
her hand assuredly to strike the fatal blow  how the very recital
terrifies me   she cast her eye towards me and saw me at the utmost
distance the room would allow and heard my broken voice my voice was
utterly broken nor knew i what i said or whether to the purpose or not
 and her charming cheeks that were all in a glow before turned pale 
as if terrified at her own purpose and lifting up her eyes thank god 
 thank god said the angel delivered for the present for the present
delivered from myself keep sir that distance   looking down towards
me who was prostrate on the floor my heart pierced as with an hundred
daggers   that distance has saved a life to what reserved the almighty
only knows  

to be happy madam and to make happy and o let me hope for your
favour for to-morrow i will put off my journey till then and may god 

swear not sir with an awful and piercing aspect you have too often
sworn god's eye is upon us his more immediate eye and looked wildly 
 but the women looked up to the ceiling as if afraid of god's eye and
trembled and well they might and i too who so very lately had each of
us the devil in our hearts 

if not to-morrow madam say but next thursday your uncle's birth-day 
say but next thursday 

this i say of this you may assure yourself i never never will be
your's and let me hope that i may be entitled to the performance of
your promise to be permitted to leave this innocent house as one called
it but long have my ears been accustomed to such inversions of words 
as soon as the day breaks 

did my perdition depend upon it that you cannot madam but upon terms 
and i hope you will not terrify me still dreading the accursed knife 

nothing less than an attempt upon my honour shall make me desperate i
have no view but to defend my honour with such a view only i entered
into treaty with your infamous agent below the resolution you have
seen i trust god will give me again upon the same occasion but for a
less i wish not for it only take notice women that i am no wife of
this man basely as he has used me i am not his wife he has no
authority over me if he go away by-and-by and you act by his authority
to detain me look to it 

then taking one of the lights she turned from us and away she went 
unmolested not a soul was able to molest her 

mabell saw her tremblingly and in a hurry take the key of her
chamber-door out of her pocket and unlock it and as soon as she
entered heard her double-lock bar and bolt it 

by her taking out her key when she came out of her chamber to us she no
doubt suspected my design which was to have carried her in my arms
thither if she made such force necessary after i had intimidated her and
to have been her companion for that night 

she was to have had several bedchamber-women to assist to undress her
upon occasion but from the moment she entered the dining-room with so
much intrepidity it was absolutely impossible to think of prosecuting my
villanous designs against her 


 


this this belford was the hand i made of a contrivance from which i
expected so much and now i am ten times worse off than before 

thou never sawest people in thy life look so like fools upon one another 
as the mother her partners and i did for a few minutes and at last 
the two devilish nymphs broke out into insulting ridicule upon me while
the old wretch was concerned for her house the reputation of her house 
i cursed them all together and retiring to my chamber locked myself
in 

and now it is time to set out all i have gained detection disgrace 
fresh guilt by repeated perjuries and to be despised by her i doat upon 
and what is still worse to a proud heart by myself 

success success in projects is every thing what an admirable
contriver did i think myself till now even for this scheme among the
rest but how pitifully foolish does it now appear to me scratch out 
erase never to be read every part of my preceding letters where i have
boastingly mentioned it and never presume to rally me upon the cursed
subject for i cannot bear it 

but for the lady by my soul i love her i admire her more than ever 
i must have her i will have her still with honour or without as i
have often vowed my cursed fright at her accidental bloody nose so
lately put her upon improving upon me thus had she threatened me i
should have soon been master of one arm and in both but for so sincere
a virtue to threaten herself and not to offer to intimidate any other 
and with so much presence of mind as to distinguish in the very
passionate intention the necessity of the act defence of her honour 
and so fairly to disavow lesser occasions showed such a deliberation 
such a choice such a principle and then keeping me so watchfully at a
distance that i could not seize her hand so soon as she could have given
the fatal blow how impossible not to be subdued by so true and so
discreet a magnanimity 

but she is not gone she shall not go i will press her with letters
for the thursday she shall yet be mine legally mine for as to
cohabitation there is no such thing to be thought of 

the captain shall give her away as proxy for her uncle my lord will
die my fortune will help my will and set me above every thing and
every body 

but here is the curse she despises me jack what man as i have
heretofore said can bear to be despised especially by his wife o
lord o lord what a hand what a cursed hand have i made of this
plot and here ends

the history of the lady and the penknife the devil take the penknife 
 it goes against me to say 

god bless the lady 

near 5 sat morn 



letter xxxvii

mr lovelace to miss clarissa harlowe
 superscribed to mrs lovelace  
m hall sat night june 24 


my dearest life 

if you do not impute to live and to terror raised by love the poor
figure i made before you last night you will not do me justice i
thought i would try to the very last moment if by complying with you in
every thing i could prevail upon you to promise to be mine on thursday
next since you refused me an earlier day could i have been so happy 
you had not been hindered going to hampstead or wherever else you
pleased but when i could not prevail upon you to give me this
assurance what room had i my demerit so great to suppose that your
going thither would not be to lose you for ever 

i will own to you madam that yesterday afternoon i picked up the paper
dropt by dorcas who has confessed that she would have assisted you in
getting away if she had had opportunity so to do and undoubtedly
dropped it by accident and could i have prevailed upon you as to
thursday next i would have made no use of it secure as i should have
been in your word given to be mine but when i found you inflexible 
i was resolved to try if by resenting dorcas's treachery i could not
make your pardon of me the condition of mine to her and if not to make
a handle of it to revoke my consent to your going away from mrs 
sinclair's since the consequence of that must have been so fatal to me 

so far indeed was my proceeding low and artful and when i was
challenged with it as such in so high and noble a manner i could not
avoid taking shame to myself upon it 

but you must permit me madam to hope that you will not punish me too
heavily for so poor a contrivance since no dishonour was meant you and
since in the moment of its execution you had as great an instance of my
incapacity to defend a wrong a low measure and at the same time in
your power over me as mortal man could give in a word since you must
have seen that i was absolutely under the controul both of conscience
and of love 

i will not offer to defend myself for wishing you to remain where you
are till either you give me your word to meet me at the altar on
thursday or till i have the honour of attending you preparative to the
solemnity which will make that day the happiest of my life 

i am but too sensible that this kind of treatment may appear to you with
the face of an arbitrary and illegal imposition but as the consequences 
not only to ourselves but to both our families may be fatal if you
cannot be moved in my favour let me beseech you to forgive this act of
compulsion on the score of the necessity you your dear self have laid me
under to be guilty of it and to permit the solemnity of next thursday to
include an act of oblivion for all past offences 

the orders i have given to the people of the house are that you shall
be obeyed in every particular that is consistent with my expectations of
finding you there on my return on wednesday next that mrs sinclair and
her nieces having incurred your just displeasure shall not without
your orders come into your presence that neither shall dorcas till she
has fully cleared her conduct to your satisfaction be permitted to
attend you but mabell in her place of whom you seemed some time ago to
express some liking will i have left behind me to attend your
commands if he be either negligent or impertinent your dismission
shall be a dismission of him from my service for ever but as to
letters which may be sent you or any which you may have to send i must
humbly entreat that none such pass from or to you for the few days that
i shall be absent  but i do assure you madam that the seals of both
sorts shall be sacred and the letters if such be sent shall be given
into your own hands the moment the ceremony is performed or before if
you require it 

mean time i will inquire and send you word how miss howe does and to
what if i can be informed her long silence is owing 

dr perkins i found here attending my lord when i arrived with dr s 
he acquaints me that your father mother uncles and the still less
worthy persons of your family are well and intend to be all at your
uncle harlowe's next week i presume with intent to keep his
anniversary this can make no alteration but a happy one as to
persons on thursday because mr tomlinson assured me that if any thing
fell out to hinder your uncle's coming up in person which however he
did not then expect he would be satisfied if his friend the captain
were proxy for him i shall send a man and horse to-morrow to the
captain to be at greater certainty 

i send this by a special messenger who will wait your pleasure in
relation to the impatiently-wished-for thursday which i humbly hope will
be signified by a line 

my lord though hardly sensible and unmindful of every thing but of your
felicity desires his most affectionate compliments to you he has in
readiness to present to you a very valuable set of jewels which he hopes
will be acceptable whether he lives to see you adorn them or not 

lady sarah and lady betty have also their tokens of respect ready to
court your acceptance but may heaven incline you to give the opportunity
of receiving their personal compliments and those of my cousins
montague before the next week be out 

his lordship is exceeding ill dr s has no hopes of him the only
consolation i can have for the death of a relation who loves me so well 
if he do die must arise from the additional power it will put into my
hands of showing how much i am 

my dearest life 
your ever-affectionate faithful 
lovelace 



letter xxxviii

mr lovelace to miss clarissa harlowe
 superscribed to mrs lovelace  
m hall sunday night june 25 


my dearest love 

i cannot find words to express how much i am mortified at the return of
my messenger without a line from you 

thursday is so near that i will send messenger after messenger every
four hours till i have a favourable answer the one to meet the other 
till its eve arrives to know if i may venture to appear in your presence
with the hope of having my wishes answered on that day 

your love madam i neither expect nor ask for nor will till my future
behaviour gives you cause to think i deserve it all i at present
presume to wish is to have it in my power to do you all the justice i
can now do you and to your generosity will i leave it to reward me as
i shall merit with your affection 

at present revolving my poor behaviour of friday night before you i
think i should sooner choose to go to my last audit unprepared for it as
i am than to appear in your presence unless you give me some hope that
i shall be received as your elected husband rather than however
deserved as a detested criminal 

let me therefore propose an expedient in order to spare my own
confusion and to spare you the necessity for that soul-harrowing
recrimination which i cannot stand and which must be disagreeable to
yourself to name the church and i will have every thing in readiness 
so that our next interview will be in a manner at the very altar and
then you will have the kind husband to forgive for the faults of the
ungrateful lover if your resentment be still too high to write more 
let it only be in your own dear hand these words st martin's church 
thursday or these st giles's church thursday nor will i insist upon
any inscription or subscription or so much as the initials of your name 
this shall be all the favour i will expect till the dear hand itself is
given to mine in presence of that being whom i invoke as a witness of
the inviolable faith and honour of

your adoring
lovelace 



letter xxxix

mr lovelace to miss clarissa harlowe
 superscribed to mrs lovelace  
m hall monday june 26 


once more my dearest love do i conjure you to send me the four
requested words there is no time to be lost and i would not have next
thursday go over without being entitled to call you mine for the world 
and that as well for your sake as for my own hitherto all that has
passed is between you and me only but after thursday if my wishes are
unanswered the whole will be before the world 

my lord is extremely ill and endures not to have me out of his sight for
one half hour but this shall not have the least weight with me if you
be pleased to hold out the olive-branch to me in the four requested
words 

i have the following intelligence from captain tomlinson 

all your family are at your uncle harlowe's your uncle finds he cannot
go up and names captain tomlinson for his proxy he proposes to keep
all your family with him till the captain assures him that the ceremony
is over 

already he has begun with hope of success to try to reconcile your
mother to you 

my lord m but just now has told me how happy he should think himself to
have an opportunity before he dies to salute you as his niece i have
put him in hopes that he shall see you and have told him that i will go
to town on wednesday in order to prevail upon you to accompany me down
on thursday or friday i have ordered a set to be in readiness to carry
me up and were not my lord so very ill my cousin montague tells me
that she would offer her attendance on you if you please therefore we
can set out for this place the moment the solemnity is performed 

do not dearest creature dissipate all those promising appearances and
by refusing to save your own and your family's reputation in the eye of
the world use yourself worse than the ungratefullest wretch on earth has
used you for if we were married all the disgrace you imagine you have
suffered while a single lady will be my own and only known to
ourselves 

once more then consider well the situation we are both in and
remember my dearest life that thursday will be soon here and that you
have no time to lose 

in a letter sent by the messenger whom i dispatch with this i have
desired that my friend mr belford who is your very great admirer and
who knows all the secrets of my heart will wait upon you to know what i
am to depend upon as to the chosen day 

surely my dear you never could at any time suffer half so much from
cruel suspense as i do 

if i have not an answer to this either from your own goodness or
through mr belford's intercession it will be too late for me to set
out and captain tomlinson will be disappointed who goes to town on
purpose to attend your pleasure 

one motive for the gentle resistance i have presumed to lay you under is 
to prevent the mischiefs that might ensue as probably to the more
innocent as to the less were you to write to any body while your
passions were so much raised and inflamed against me having apprized
you of my direction to the women in town on this head i wonder you
should have endeavoured to send a letter to miss howe although in a
cover directed to that young lady's servant as you must think it would
be likely to fall into my hands 


 the lady had made an attempt to send away a letter 


the just sense of what i have deserved the contents should be leaves me
no room to doubt what they are nevertheless i return it you enclosed 
with the seal as you will see unbroken 

relieve i beseech you dearest madam by the four requested words or by
mr belford the anxiety of

your ever-affectionate and obliged
lovelace 

remember there will not there cannot be time for further writing and
for coming up by thursday your uncle's birth-day 



letter xl

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday june 26 


thou wilt see the situation i am in with miss harlowe by the enclosed
copies of three letters to two of which i am so much scorned as not to
have one word given me in answer and of the third now sent by the
messenger who brings thee this i am afraid as little notice will be
taken and if so her day of grace is absolutely over 

one would imagine so long used to constraint too as she has been that
she might have been satisfied with the triumph she had over us all on
friday night a triumph that to this hour has sunk my pride and my vanity
so much that i almost hate the words plot contrivance scheme and
shall mistrust myself in future for every one that rises to my inventive
head 

but seest thou not that i am under a necessity to continue her at
sinclair's and to prohibit all her correspondencies 

now belford as i really in my present mood think of nothing less
than marrying her if she let not thursday slip i would have thee attend
her in pursuance of the intimation i have given her in my letter of this
date and vow for me swear for me bind thy soul to her for my honour 
and use what arguments thy friendly heart can suggest in order to
procure me an answer from her which as thou wilt see she may give in
four words only and then i purpose to leave lord m dangerously ill as
he is and meet her at her appointed church in order to solemnize if
she will but sign cl h to thy writing the four words that shall do 
for i would not come up to be made a fool of in the face of all my family
and friends 

if she should let the day go off i shall be desperate i am entangled
in my own devices and cannot bear that she should detect me 

o that i had been honest what a devil are all my plots come to what
do they end in but one grand plot upon myself and a title to eternal
infamy and disgrace but depending on thy friendly offices i will say
no more of this let her send me but one line but one line to treat
me as unworthy of her notice yet be altogether in my power i cannot i
will not bear that 

my lord as i said is extremely ill the doctors give him over he
gives himself over those who would not have him die are afraid he will
die but as to myself i am doubtful for these long and violent
struggles between the constitution and the disease though the latter has
three physicians and an apothecary to help it forward and all three as
to their prescriptions of different opinions too indicate a plaguy
habit and savour more of recovery than death and the more so as he has
no sharp or acute mental organs to whet out his bodily ones and to raise
his fever above the sympathetic helpful one 

thou wilt see in the enclosed what pains i am at to dispatch messengers 
who are constantly on the road to meet each other and one of them to
link in the chain with the fourth whose station is in london and five
miles onwards or till met but in truth i have some other matters for
them to perform at the same time with my lord's banker and his lawyer 
which will enable me if his lordship is so good as to die this bout to
be an over match for some of my other relations i don't mean charlotte
and patty for they are noble girls but others who have been scratching
and clawing under-ground like so many moles in my absence and whose
workings i have discovered since i have been down by the little heaps of
dirt they have thrown up 

a speedy account of thy commission dear jack the letter travels all
night 



letter xli

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
london june 27 tuesday 


you must excuse me lovelace from engaging in the office you would have
me undertake till i can be better assured you really intend honourably
at last by this much-injured lady 

i believe you know your friend belford too well to think he would be easy
with you or with any man alive who should seek to make him promise for
him what he never intended to perform and let me tell thee that i have
not much confidence in the honour of a man why by imitation of hands i
will only call it has shown so little regard to the honour of his own
relations 

only that thou hast such jesuitical qualifyings or i should think thee
at last touched with remorse and brought within view of being ashamed
of thy cursed inventions by the ill success of thy last which i heartily
congratulate thee upon 

o the divine lady but i will not aggravate 

nevertheless when thou writest that in thy present mood thou thinkest
of marrying and yet canst so easily change thy mood when i know thy
heart is against the state that the four words thou courtest from the
lady are as much to thy purpose as if she wrote forty since it will
show she can forgive the highest injury that can be offered to woman and
when i recollect how easily thou canst find excuses to postpone thou
must be more explicit a good deal as to thy real intentions and future
honour than thou art for i cannot trust to temporary remorse which
brought on by disappointment too and not by principle and the like of
which thou hast so often got over 

if thou canst convince me time enough for the day that thou meanest to
do honourably by her in her own sense of the word or if not time
enough wilt fix some other day which thou oughtest to leave to her
option and not bind her down for the thursday and the rather as thy
pretence for so doing is founded on an absolute fiction i will then
most cheerfully undertake thy cause by person if she will admit me to
her presence if she will not by pen but in this case thou must
allow me to be guarantee for thy family and if so so much as i value
thee and respect thy skill in all the qualifications of a gentleman 
thou mayest depend upon it that i will act up to the character of a
guarantee with more honour than the princes of our day usually do to
their shame be it spoken 

mean time let me tell thee that my heart bleeds for the wrong this
angelic lady has received and if thou dost not marry her if she will
have thee and when married make her the best and tenderest of
husbands i would rather be a dog a monkey a bear a viper or a toad 
than thee 

command me with honour and thou shalt find none readier to oblige thee
than

thy sincere friend 
john belford 



letter xlii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
m hall june 27 tuesday night near 12 


your's reached me this moment by an extraordinary push in the
messengers 

what a man of honour thou of a sudden 

and so in the imaginary shape of a guarantee thou threatenest me 

had i not been in earnest as to the lady i should not have offered to
employ thee in the affair but let me say that hadst thou undertaken
the task and i hadst afterwards thought fit to change my mind i should
have contented myself to tell thee that that was my mind when thou
engagedst for me and to have given thee the reasons for the change and
then left thee to thy own discretion for never knew i what fear of man
was nor fear of woman neither till i became acquainted with miss
clarissa harlowe nay what is most surprising till i came to have her
in my power 

and so thou wilt not wait upon the charmer of my heart but upon terms
and conditions let it alone and be curs'd i care not but so much
credit did i give to the value thou expressedst for her that i thought
the office would have been acceptable to thee as serviceable to me 
for what was it but to endeavour to persuade her to consent to the
reparation of her own honour for what have i done but disgraced myself 
and been a thief to my own joys and if there be a union of hearts and
an intention to solemnize what is there wanting but the foolish
ceremony and that i still offer but if she will keep back her hand 
if she will make me hold out mine in vain how can i help it 

i write her one more letter and if after she has received that she
keeps sullen silence she must thank herself for what is to follow 

but after all my heart is not wholly her's i love her beyond
expression and cannot help it i hope therefore she will receive this
last tender as i wish i hope she intends not like a true woman to
plague and vex and tease me now she has found her power if she will
take me to mercy now these remorses are upon me though i scorn to
condition with thee for my sincerity all her trials as i have
heretofore declared shall be over and she shall be as happy as i can
make her for ruminating upon all that has passed between us from the
first hour of our acquaintance till the present i must pronounce that
she is virtue itself and once more i say has no equal 

as to what you hint of leaving to her choice another day do you
consider that it will be impossible that my contrivances and stratagems
should be much longer concealed this makes me press that day though so
near and the more as i have made so much ado about her uncle's
anniversary if she send me the four words i will spare no fatigue to
be in time if not for the canonical hour at church for some other hour
of the day in her own apartment or any other for money will do every
thing and that i have never spared in this affair 

to show thee that i am not at enmity with thee i enclose the copies of
two letters one to her it is the fourth and must be the last on the
subject the other to captain tomlinson calculated as thou wilt see 
for him to show her 

and now jack interfere in this case or not thou knowest the mind of

r lovelace 



letter xliii

mr lovelace to miss clarissa harlowe
 superscribed to mrs lovelace  
m hall wed morning one o'clock june 28 


not one line my dearest life not one word in answer to three letters
i have written the time is now so short that this must be the last
letter that can reach you on this side the important hour that might make
us legally one 

my friend mr belford is apprehensive that he cannot wait upon you in
time by reason of some urgent affairs of his own 

i the less regret the disappointment because i have procured a more
acceptable person as i hope to attend you captain tomlinson i mean 
to whom i had applied for this purpose before i had mr belford's
answer 

i was the more solicitous to obtain his favour form him because of the
office he is to take upon him as i humbly presume to hope to-morrow 
that office obliged him to be in town as this day and i acquainted him
with my unhappy situation with you and desired that he would show me 
on this occasion that i had as much of his favour and friendship as your
uncle had since the whole treaty must be broken off if he could not
prevail upon you in my behalf 

he will dispatch the messenger directly whom i propose to meet in person
at slough either to proceed onward to london with a joyful heart or to
return back to m hall with a broken one 

i ought not but cannot help it to anticipate the pleasure mr tomlinson
proposes to himself in acquainting you with the likelihood there is of
your mother's seconding your uncle's views for it seems he has
privately communicated to her his laudable intentions and her resolution
depends as well as his upon what to-morrow will produce 

disappoint not then i beseech you for an hundred persons' sakes as
well as for mine that uncle and that mother whose displeasure i have
heard you so often deplore 

you may think it impossible for me to reach london by the canonical hour 
if it should the ceremony may be performed in your own apartments at
any time in the day or at night so that captain tomlinson may have it
to aver to your uncle that it was performed on his anniversary 

tell but the captain that you forbid me not to attend you and that
shall be sufficient for bringing to you on the wings of love 

your ever-grateful and affectionate
lovelace 



letter xliv

to mr patrick m'donald 
at his lodgings at mr brown's peruke-maker in st martin's lane 
 westminster
m hall wedn morning two o'clock 

dear m'donald 

the bearer of this has a letter to carry to the lady i have been at
the trouble of writing a copy of it which i enclose that you may not
mistake your cue 


 see the preceding letter 


you will judge of my reasons for ante-dating the enclosed sealed one 
directed to you by the name of tomlinson which you are to show to the
lady as in confidence you will open it of course 


 see the next letter 


i doubt not your dexterity and management dear m'donald nor your zeal 
especially as the hope of cohabitation must now be given up impossible
to be carried is that scheme i might break her heart but not incline
her will am in earnest therefore to marry her if she let not the day
slip 

improve upon the hint of her mother that may touch her but john
harlowe remember has privately engaged that lady privately i say 
else not to mention the reason for her uncle harlowe's former
expedient you know she might find means to get a letter away to the
one or to the other to know the truth or to miss howe to engage her
to inquire into it and if she should the word privately will account
for the uncle's and mother's denying it 

however fail not as from me to charge our mother and her nymphs to
redouble their vigilance both as to her person and letters all's upon a
crisis now but she must not be treated ill neither 

thursday over i shall know what to resolve upon 

if necessary you must assume authority the devil's in't if such a
girl as this shall awe a man of your years and experience you are not
in love with her as i am fly out if she doubt your honour spirits
naturally soft may be beat out of their play and borne down though ever
so much raised by higher anger all women are cowards at bottom only
violent where they may i have often stormed a girl out of her mistrust 
and made her yield before she knew where she was to the point
indignantly mistrusted and that to make up with me though i was the
aggressor 

if this matter succeed as i'd have it or if not and do not fail by
your fault i will take you off the necessity of pursuing your cursed
smuggling which otherwise may one day end fatally for you 

we are none of us perfect m'donald this sweet lady makes me serious
sometimes in spite of my heart but as private vices are less blamable
than public an as i think smuggling as it is called a national evil 
i have no doubt to pronounce you a much worse man than myself and as
such shall take pleasure in reforming you 

i send you enclosed ten guineas as a small earnest of further favours 
hitherto you have been a very clever fellow 

as to clothes for thursday monmouth-street will afford a ready supply 
clothes quite new would make your condition suspected but you may
defer that care till you see if she can be prevailed upon your
riding-dress will do for the first visit nor let your boots be over
clean i have always told you the consequence of attending to the
minutiae where art or imposture as the ill-mannered would call it is
designed your linen rumpled and soily when you wait upon her easy terms
these just come to town remember as formerly to loll to throw out
your legs to stroke and grasp down your ruffles as if of significance
enough to be careless what though the presence of a fine lady would
require a different behaviour are you not of years to dispense with
politeness you can have no design upon her you know you are a father
yourself of daughters as old as she evermore is parade and
obsequiousness suspectable it must show either a foolish head or a
knavish heart assume airs of consequence therefore and you will be
treated as a man of consequence i have often more than half ruined
myself by my complaisance and being afraid of controul have brought
controul upon myself 

i think i have no more to say at present i intend to be at slough or
on the way to it as by mine to the lady adieu honest m'donald 

r l 



letter xlv

to captain tomlinson
 enclosed in the preceding to be shown to the lady as in confidence  
m hall tuesday morn june 27 


dear captain tomlinson 

an unhappy misunderstanding has arisen between the dearest lady in the
world and me the particulars of which she perhaps may give you but i
will not because i might be thought partial to myself and she refusing
to answer my most pressing and respectful letters i am at a most
perplexing uncertainty whether she will meet us or not next thursday to
solemnize 

my lord is so extremely ill that if i thought she would not oblige me 
i would defer going up to town for two or three days he cares not to
have me out of his sight yet is impatient to salute my beloved as his
neice  sic  before he dies this i have promised to give him an
opportunity to do intending if the dear creature will make me happy 
to set out with her for this place directly from church 

with regret i speak it of the charmer of my soul that irreconcilableness
is her family-fault the less excusable indeed for her as she herself
suffers by it in so high a degree from her own relations 

now sir as you intended to be in town some time before thursday if
it be not too great an inconvenience to you i could be glad you would
go up as soon as possible for my sake and this i the more boldly
request as i presume that a man who has so many great affairs of his
own in hand as you have would be glad to be at a certainty as to the
day 

you sir can so pathetically and justly set before her the unhappy
consequences that will follow if the day be postponed as well with
regard to her uncle's disappointment as to the part you have assured
me her mother is willing to take in the wished-for reconciliation that
i have great hopes she will suffer herself to be prevailed upon and a
man and horse shall be in waiting to take your dispatches and bring them
to me 

but if you cannot prevail in my favour you will be pleased to satisfy
your friend mr john harlowe that it is not my fault that he is not
obliged i am dear sir 

your extremely obliged
and faithful servant 
r lovelace 



letter xlvi

to robert lovelace esq 
wedn june 28 near twelve o'clock 


honoured sir 

i received your's as your servant desired me to acquaint you by ten
this morning horse and man were in a foam 

i instantly equipped myself as if come off from a journey and posted
away to the lady intending to plead great affairs that i came not
before in order to favour your antedate and likewise to be in a hurry 
to have a pretence to hurry her ladyship and to take no denial for her
giving a satisfactory return to your messenger but upon my entering
mrs sinclair's house i found all in the greatest consternation 

you must not sir be surprised it is a trouble to me to be the
relater of the bad news but so it is the lady is gone off she was
missed but half an hour before i came 

her waiting-maid is run away or hitherto is not to be found so that
they conclude it was by her connivance 

they had sent before i came to my honoured masters mr belton mr 
mowbray and mr belford mr tourville is out of town 

high words are passing between madam sinclair and madam horton and
madam martin as also with dorcas and your servant william threatens
to hang or drown himself 

they have sent to know if they can hear of mabell the waiting-maid at
her mother's who it seems lives in chick-lane west-smithfield and to
an uncle of her's also who keeps an alehouse at cow-cross had by and
with whom she lived last 

your messenger having just changed his horse is come back so i will
not detain him longer than to add that i am with great concern for this
misfortune and thanks for your seasonable favour and kind intentions
towards me i am sure this was not my fault 

honoured sir 
your most obliged humble servant 
patrick m'donald 



letter xlvii

mr mowbray to robert lovelace esq 
wednesday twelve o'clock 


dear lovelace 

i have plaguy news to acquaint thee with miss harlowe is gone off 
quite gone by soul i have no time for particulars your servant being
gone off but if i had we are not yet come to the bottom of the matter 
the ladies here are all blubbering like devills accusing one another
most confoundedly whilst belton and i damn them all together in thy
name 

if thou shouldst hear that thy fellow will is taken dead out of some
horse-pond and dorcas cut down from her bed's teaster from dangling
in her own garters be not surprised here's the devil to pay nobody
serene but jack belford who is taking minutes of examinations 
accusations and confessions with the significant air of a middlesex
justice and intends to write at large all particulars i suppose 

i heartily condole with thee so does belton but it may turn out for
the best for she is gone away with thy marks i understand a foolish
little devill where will she mend herself for nobody will look upon
her and they tell me that thou wouldst certainly have married her had
she staid but i know thee better 

dear bobby adieu if lord m will die now to comfort thee for this
loss what a seasonable exit would he make let's have a letter from
thee pr'ythee do thou can'st write devill-like to belford who shews
us nothing at all thine heartily 

rd mowbray 



letter xlviii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
thursday june 29 


thou hast heard from m'donald and mowbray the news bad or good i know
not which thou'lt deem it i only wish i could have given thee joy upon
the same account before the unhappy lady was seduced from hampstead for
then of what an ungrateful villany hadst thou been spared the
perpetration which now thou hast to answer for 

i came to town purely to serve thee with her expecting that thy next
would satisfy me that i might endeavour it without dishonour and at
first when i found her gone i half pitied thee for now wilt thou be
inevitably blown up and in what an execrable light wilt thou appear to
all the world poor lovelace caught in thy own snares thy punishment
is but beginning 

but to my narrative for i suppose thou expectest all particulars from
me since mowbray has informed thee that i have been collecting them 

the noble exertion of spirit she has made on friday night had it
seems greatly disordered her insomuch that she was not visible till
saturday evening when mabell saw her and she seemed to be very ill 
but on sunday morning having dressed herself as if designing to go to
church she ordered mabell to get her a coach to the door 

the wench told her she was to obey her in every thing but the calling
of a coach or chair or in relation to letters 

she sent for will and gave him the same command 

he pleaded his master's orders to the contrary and desired to be
excused 

upon this down she went herself and would have gone out without
observation but finding the street-door double-locked and the key not
in the lock she stept into the street-parlour and would have thrown up
the sash to call out to the people passing by as they doubted not but
that since her last attempt of the same nature had been fastened down 

hereupon she resolutely stept into mrs sinclair's parlour in the
back-house where were the old devil and her two partners and demanded
the key of the street-door or to have it opened for her 

they were all surprised but desired to be excused and pleaded your
orders 

she asserted that you had no authority over her and never should have
any that their present refusal was their own act and deed she saw the
intent of their back house and the reason of putting her there she
pleaded her condition and fortune and said they had no way to avoid
utter ruin but by opening their doors to her or by murdering her and
burying her in their garden or cellar too deep for detection that
already what had been done to her was punishable by death and bid them
at their peril detain her 

what a noble what a right spirit has this charming creature in cases
that will justify an exertion of spirit 

they answered that mr lovelace could prove his marriage and would
indemnify them and they all would have vindicated their behaviour on
friday night and the reputation of their house but refusing to hear
them on that topic she flung from them threatening 

she then went up half a dozen stairs in her way to her own apartment 
but as if she had bethought herself down she stept again and proceeded
towards the street-parlour saying as she passed by the infamous dorcas 
i'll make myself protectors though the windows suffer but that wench 
of her own head on the lady's going out of that parlour to mrs 
sinclair's had locked the door and taken out the key so that finding
herself disappointed she burst into tears and went sobbing and menacing
up stairs again 

she made no other attempt till the effectual one your letters and
messages they suppose coming so fast upon one another though she would
not answer one of them gave her some amusement and an assurance to
them that she would at last forgive you and that then all would end as
you wished 

the women in pursuance of your orders offered not to obtrude
themselves upon her and dorcas also kept out of her sight all the rest
of sunday also on monday and tuesday but by the lady's condescension 
 even to familiarity to mabell they imagined that she must be working
in her mind all that time to get away they therefore redoubled their
cautions to the wench who told them so faithfully all that passed
between her lady and her that they had no doubt of her fidelity to her
wicked trust 

'tis probable she might have been contriving something all this time 
but saw no room for perfecting any scheme the contrivance by which she
effected her escape seems to me not to have been fallen upon till the
very day since it depended partly upon the weather as it proved but
it is evident she hoped something from mabell's simplicity or gratitude 
or compassion by cultivating all the time her civility to her 

polly waited on her early on wednesday morning and met with a better
reception than she had reason to expect she complained however with
warmth of her confinement polly said there would be an happy end to it
 if it were a confinement next day she presumed she absolutely
declared to the contrary in the way polly meant it and said that mr 
lovelace on his return  which looked as if she intended to wait for it 
should have reason to repent the orders he had given as they all should
their observance of them let him send twenty letters she would not
answer one be the consequence what it would nor give him hope of the
least favour while she was in that house she had given mrs sinclair
and themselves fair warning she said no orders of another ought to make
them detain a free person but having made an open attempt to go and
been detained by them she was the calmer she told polly let them look
to the consequence 

but yet she spoke this with temper and polly gave it as her opinion 
 with apprehension for their own safety that having so good a handle to
punish them all she would not go away if she might and what inferred
polly is the indemnity of a man who has committed the vilest of rapes on
a person of condition and must himself if prosecuted for it either
fly or be hanged 

sinclair  so i will still call her   upon this representation of polly 
foresaw she said the ruin of her poor house in the issue of this
strange business and the infamous sally and dorcas bore their parts in
the apprehension and this put them upon thinking it advisable for the
future that the street-door should generally in the day-time be only
left upon a bolt-latch as they called it which any body might open on
the inside and that the key should be kept in the door that their
numerous comers and goers as they called their guests should be able to
give evidence that she might have gone out if she would not forgetting 
however to renew their orders to will to dorcas to mabell and the
rest to redouble their vigilance on this occasion to prevent her
escape none of them doubting at the same time that her love of a man
so considerable in their eyes and the prospect of what was to happen as
she had reason to believe on thursday her uncle's birth-day would
 though perhaps not till the last hour for her pride sake was their
word engage her to change her temper 

they believe that she discovered the key to be left in the door for
she was down more than once to walk in the little garden and seemed to
cast her eye each time to the street-door 

about eight yesterday morning an hour after polly had left her she
told mabell she was sure she should not live long and having a good
many suits of apparel which after her death would be of no use to any
body she valued she would give her a brown lustring gown which with
some alterations to make it more suitable to her degree would a great
while serve her for a sunday wear for that she mabell was the only
person in that house of whom she could think without terror or antipathy 

mabell expressing her gratitude upon the occasion the lady said she
had nothing to employ herself about and if she could get a workwoman
directly she would look over her things then and give her what she
intended for her 

her mistress's mantua-maker the maid replied lived but a little way
off and she doubted not that she could procure her or one of the
journey-women to alter the gown out of hand 

i will give you also said she a quilted coat which will require but
little alteration if any for you are much about my stature but the
gown i will give directions about because the sleeves and the robings
and facings must be altered for your wear being i believe above your
station and try said she if you can get the workwoman and we'll
advise about it if she cannot come now let her come in the afternoon 
but i had rather now because it will amuse me to give you a lift 

then stepping to the window it rains said she  and so it had done all
the morning   slip on the hood and short cloak i have seen you wear and
come to me when you are ready to go out because you shall bring me in
something that i want 

mabell equipped herself accordingly and received her commands to buy
her some trifles and then left her but in her way out stept into the
back parlour where dorcas was with mrs sinclair telling her where she
was going and on what account bidding dorcas look out till she came
back so faithful as the wench to the trust reposed in her and so
little had the lady's generosity wrought upon her 

mrs sinclair commended her dorcas envied her and took her cue and
mabell soon returned with the mantua-maker's journey-woman she
resolved she said but she would not come without her and then dorcas
went off guard 

the lady looked out the gown and petticoat and before the workwoman
caused mabell to try it on and that it might fit the better made the
willing wench pull off her upper-petticoat and put on that she gave her 
then she bid them go into mr lovelace's apartment and contrive about it
before the pier-glass there and stay till she came to them to give them
her opinion 

mabell would have taken her own clothes and hood and short cloak with
her but her lady said no matter you may put them on again here when
we have considered about the alterations there's no occasion to litter
the other room 

they went and instantly as it is supposed she slipt on mabell's gown
and petticoat over her own which was white damask and put on the
wench's hood short cloak and ordinary apron and down she went 

hearing somebody tripping along the passage both will and dorcas whipt
to the inner-hall door and saw her but taking her for mabell are you
going far mabell cried will 

without turning her face or answering she held out her hand pointing
to the stairs which they construed as a caution for them to look out in
her absence and supposing she would not be long gone as she had not in
form repeated her caution to them up went will tarrying at the
stairs-head in expectation of the supposed mabell's return 

mabell and the workwoman waited a good while amusing themselves not
disagreeably the one with contriving in the way of her business the
other delighting herself with her fine gown and coat but at last 
wondering the lady did not come in to them mabell tiptoed it to her
door and tapping and not being answered stept into the chamber 

will at that instant from his station at the stairs-head seeing
mabell in her lady's clothes for he had been told of the present  gifts
to servants fly from servant to servant in a minute   was very much
surprised having as he thought just seen her go out in her own and
stepping up met her at the door how the devil can this be said he 
just now you went out in your own dress how came you here in this and
how could you pass me unseen but nevertheless kissing her said he
would now brag he had kissed his lady or one in her clothes 

i am glad mr william cried mabell to see you here so diligently 
but know you where my lady is 

in my master's apartment answered will is she not was she not
talking with you this moment 

no that's mrs dolins's journey-woman 

they both stood aghast as they said will again recollecting he had
seen mabell as he thought go out in her own clothes and while they
were debating and wondering up comes dorcas with your fourth letter 
just then brought for the lady and seeing mabell dressed out whom she
had likewise beheld a little before as she supposed in her common
clothes she joined in the wonder till mabell re-entering the lady's
apartment missed her own clothes and then suspecting what had happened 
and letting the others into the ground of the suspicion they all agreed
that she had certainly escaped and then followed such an uproar of
mutual accusation and you should have done this and you have done that 
as alarmed the whole house every apartment in both houses giving up its
devil to the number of fourteen or fifteen including the mother and her
partners 

will told them his story and then ran out as on the like occasion
formerly to make inquiry whether the lady was seen by any of the
coachmen chairmen or porters plying in that neighbourhood while
dorcas cleared herself immediately and that at the poor mabell's
expense who made a figure as guilty as awkward having on the suspected
price of her treachery which dorcas out of envy was ready to tear from
her back 

hereupon all the pack opened at the poor wench while the mother foamed
at the mouth bellowed out her orders for seizing the suspected offender 
who could neither be heard in her own defence nor had she been heard 
would have been believed 

that such a perfidious wretch should ever disgrace her house was the
mother's cry good people might be corrupted but it was a fine thing if
such a house as her's could not be faithfully served by cursed creatures
who were hired knowing the business they were to be employed in and who
had no pretence to principle d n her the wretch proceeded she had
no patience with her call the cook and call the scullion 

they were at hand 

see that guilty pyeball devil was her word her lady's gown upon her
back but i'll punish her for a warning to all betrayers of their trust 
put on the great gridiron this moment  an oath or a curse at every
word   make up a roaring fire the cleaver bring me this instant i'll
cut her into quarters with my own hands and carbonade and broil the
traitress for a feast to all the dogs and cats in the neighbourhood and
eat the first slice of the toad myself without salt or pepper 

the poor mabell frighted out of her wits expected every moment to be
torn in pieces having half a score open-clawed paws upon her all at
once she promised to confess all but that all when she had obtained
a hearing was nothing for nothing had she to confess 

sally hereupon with a curse of mercy ordered her to retire 
undertaking that she and polly would examine her themselves that they
might be able to write all particulars to his honour and then if she
could not clear herself or if guilty give some account of the lady 
 who had been so wicked as to give them all this trouble so as they
might get her again then the cleaver and gridiron might go to work with
all their heart 

the wench glad of this reprieve went up stairs and while sally was
laying out the law and prating away in her usual dictorial manner whipt
on another gown and sliding down the stairs escaped to her relations 
and this flight which was certainly more owing to terror than guilt 
was in the true old bailey construction made a confirmation of the
latter 


 


these are the particulars of miss harlowe's flight thou'lt hardly think
me too minute how i long to triumph over thy impatience and fury on the
occasion 

let me beseech thee my dear lovelace in thy next letter to rave most
gloriously i shall be grievously disappointed if thou dost not 


 


where lovelace can the poor lady be gone and who can describe the
distress she must be in 

by thy former letters it may be supposed that she can have very little
money nor by the suddenness of her flight more clothes than those she
has on and thou knowest who once said her parents will not receive
her her uncles will not entertain her her norton is in their
direction and cannot miss howe dare not she has not one friend or
intimate in town entirely a stranger to it  and let me add has been
despoiled of her honour by the man for whom she had made all these
sacrifices and who stood bound to her by a thousand oaths and vows to
be her husband her protector and friend 


 see vol iv letter xxi 


how strong must be her resentment of the barbarous treatment she has
received how worthy of herself that it has made her hate the man she
once loved and rather than marry him choose to expose her disgrace to
the whole world to forego the reconciliation with her friends which her
heart was so set upon and to hazard a thousand evils to which her youth
and her sex may too probably expose an indigent and friendly beauty 

rememberest thou not that home push upon thee in one of the papers
written in her delirium of which however it savours not 

i will assure thee that i have very often since most seriously reflected
upon it and as thy intended second outrage convinces me that it made no
impression upon thee then and perhaps thou hast never thought of it
since i will transcribe the sentence 

if as religion teaches us god will judge us in a great measure by
our benevolent or evil actions to one another o wretch bethink thee in
time bethink thee how great must be thy condemnation  


 see vol vi letter xvi 


and is this amiable doctrine the sum of religion upon my faith 
believe it is for to indulge a serious thought since we are not
atheists except in practice does god the being of beings want any
thing of us for himself and does he not enjoin us works of mercy to one
another as the means to obtain his mercy a sublime principle and
worthy of the supreme superintendent and father of all things but if we
are to be judged by this noble principle what indeed must be thy
condemnation on the score of this lady only and what mine and what all
our confraternity's on the score of other women though we are none of
us half so bad as thou art as well for want of inclination i hope as
of opportunity 

i must add that as well for thy own sake as for the lady's i wish ye
were yet to be married to each other it is the only medium that can be
hit upon to salve the honour of both all that's past may yet be
concealed from the world and from all her sufferings if thou resolvest
to be a tender and kind husband to her 

and if this really be thy intention i will accept with pleasure of a
commission from thee that shall tend to promote so good an end whenever
she can be found that is to say if she will admit to her presence a man
who professes friendship to thee nor can i give a greater
demonstration that i am

thy sincere friend 
j belford 

p s mabell's clothes were thrown into the passage this morning nobody
knows by whom 



letter xlix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
friday june 30 


i am ruined undone blown up destroyed and worse than annihilated 
that's certain but was not the news shocking enough dost thou think 
without thy throwing into the too-weighty scale reproaches which thou
couldst have had no opportunity to make but for my own voluntary
communications at a time too when as it falls out i have another very
sensible disappointment to struggle with 

i imagine if there be such a thing as future punishment it must be none
of the smallest mortifications that a new devil shall be punished by a
worse old one and take that and take that to have the old satyr
cry to the screaming sufferer laying on with a cat-o'-nine-tails with a
star of burning brass at the end of each and for what for what why 
if the truth may be fairly told for not being so bad a devil as myself 

thou art surely casuist good enough to know what i have insisted
upon heretofore that the sin of seducing a credulous and easy girl is
as great as that of bringing to your lure an incredulous and watchful
one 


 see vol iv letter xvii 


however ungenerous an appearance what i am going to say may have from my
pen let me tell thee that if such a woman as miss harlowe chose to
enter into the matrimonial state  i am resolved to disappoint thee in
thy meditated triumph over my rage and despair   and according to the
old patriarchal system to go on contributing to get sons and daughters 
with no other view than to bring them up piously and to be good and
useful members of the commonwealth what a devil had she to do to let
her fancy run a gadding after a rake one whom she knew to be a rake 

oh but truly she hoped to have the merit of reclaiming him she had
formed pretty notions how charming it would look to have a penitent of
her own making dangling at her side at church through an applauding
neighbourhood and as their family increased marching with her thither 
at the head of their boys and girls processionally as it were boasting
of the fruits of their honest desires as my good lord bishop has it in
his license and then what a comely sight all kneeling down together
in one pew according to eldership as we have seen in effigy a whole
family upon some old monument where the honest chevalier in armour is
presented kneeling with up-lifted hands and half a dozen jolter-headed
crop-eared boys behind him ranged gradatim or step-fashion according to
age and size all in the same posture facing his pious dame with a ruff
about her neck and as many whey-faced girls all kneeling behind her an
altar between them and an open book upon it over their heads
semiluminary rays darting from gilded clouds surrounding an achievement-
motto in coelo salus or quies perhaps if they have happened to live
the usual married life of brawl and contradiction 

it is certainly as much my misfortune to have fallen in with miss
clarissa harlowe were i to have valued my reputation or ease as it is
that of miss harlowe to have been acquainted with me and after all 
what have i done more than prosecute the maxim by which thou and i and
every rake are governed and which before i knew this lady we have
pursued from pretty girl to pretty girl as fast as we have set one down 
taking another up just as the fellows do with their flying coaches and
flying horses at a country fair with a who rides next who rides
next 

but here in the present case to carry on the volant metaphor for i
must either be merry or mad is a pretty little miss just come out of
her hanging-sleeve-coat brought to buy a pretty little fairing for the
world jack is but a great fair thou knowest and to give thee serious
reflection for serious all its joys but tinselled hobby-horses gilt
gingerbread squeaking trumpets painted drums and so forth 

now behold this pretty little miss skimming from booth to booth in a
very pretty manner one pretty little fellow called wyerley perhaps 
another jiggeting rascal called biron a third simpering varlet of the
name of symmes and a more hideous villain than any of the reset with a
long bag under his arm and parchment settlements tagged to his heels 
yelped solmes pursue her from raree-show to raree-show shouldering upon
one another at every turn stopping when she stops and set a spinning
again when she moves and thus dangled after but still in the eye of
her watchful guardians traverses the pretty little miss through the
whole fair equally delighted and delighting till at last taken with
the invitation of the laced-hat orator and seeing several pretty little
bib-wearers stuck together in the flying-coaches cutting safely the
yielding air in the one-go-up the other go-down picture-of-the-world
vehicle and all with as little fear as wit is tempted to ride next 

in then suppose she slily pops when none of her friends are near her 
and if after two or three ups and downs her pretty head turns giddy 
and she throws herself out of the coach when at its elevation and so
dashes out her pretty little brains who can help it and would you hang
the poor fellow whose professed trade it was to set the pretty little
creature a flying 

tis true this pretty little miss being a very pretty little miss 
being a very much-admired little miss being a very good little miss who
always minded her book and had passed through her sampler-doctrine with
high applause had even stitched out in gaudy propriety of colors an
abraham offering up isaac a sampson and the philistines and flowers 
and knots and trees and the sun and the moon and the seven stars all
hung up in frames with glasses before them for the admiration of her
future grand children who likewise was entitled to a very pretty little
estate who was descended from a pretty little family upwards of one
hundred years gentility which lived in a very pretty little manner 
respected a very little on their own accounts a great deal on her's 

for such a pretty little miss as this to come to so great a misfortune 
must be a very sad thing but tell me would not the losing of any
ordinary child of any other less considerable family or less shining or
amiable qualities have been as great and heavy a loss to that family as
the losing this pretty little miss could be to her's 

to descend to a very low instance and that only as to personality hast
thou any doubt that thy strong-muscled bony-faced was as much admired by
thy mother as if it had been the face of a lovelace or any other
handsome fellow and had thy picture been drawn would she have forgiven
the painter had he not expressed so exactly thy lineaments as that
every one should have discerned the likeness the handsome likeness is
all that is wished for ugliness made familiar to us with the
partiality natural to fond parents will be beauty all the world over 
do thou apply 

but alas jack all this is but a copy of my countenance drawn to evade
thy malice though it answer thy unfriendly purpose to own it i cannot
forbear to own it that i am stung to the very soul with this unhappy 
accident must i call it have i nobody whose throat either for
carelessness or treachery i ought to cut in order to pacify my
vengeance 

when i reflect upon my last iniquitous intention the first outrage so
nobly resented as well as so far as she was able so nobly resisted i
cannot but conclude that i was under the power of fascination from these
accursed circes who pretending to know their own sex would have it 
that there is in every woman a yielding or a weak-resisting moment to be
met with and that yet and yet and yet i had not tried enough but
that if neither love nor terror should enable me to hit that lucky
moment when by help of their cursed arts she was once overcome she
would be for ever overcome appealing to all my experience to all my
knowledge of the sex for justification of their assertion 

my appeal to experience i own was but too favourable to their argument 
for dost thou think i could have held my purpose against such an angel as
this had i ever before met with a woman so much in earnest to defend her
honour against the unwearied artifices and perseverance of the man she
loved why then were there not more examples of a virtue so immovable 
or why was this singular one to fall to my lot except indeed to double
my guilt and at the same time to convince all that should hear her
story that there are angels as well as devils in the flesh 

so much for confession and for the sake of humouring my conscience with
a view likewise to disarm thy malice by acknowledgement since no one shall
say worse of me than i will of myself on this occasion 

one thing i will nevertheless add to show the sincerity of my contrition
 tis this that if thou canst by any means find her out within these
three days or any time before she has discovered the stories relating to
captain tomlinson and her uncle to be what they are and if thou canst
prevail upon her to consent i will actually in thy presence and his 
 he to represent her uncle marry her 

i am still in hopes it may be so she cannot be long concealed i have
already set all engines at work to find her out and if i do what
indifferent persons  and no one of her friends as thou observest will
look upon her   will care to embroil themselves with a man of my figure 
fortune and resolution show her this part then or any other part of
this letter as thy own discretion if thou canst find her for after
all methinks i would be glad that this affair which is bad enough in
itself should go off without worse personal consequences to any body
else and yet it runs in my mind i know not why that sooner or later
it will draw a few drops of blood after it except she and i can make it
up between ourselves and this may be another reason why she should not
carry her resentment too far not that such an affair would give me much
concern neither were i to choose any man of men for i heartily hate all
her family but herself and ever shall 


 


let me add that the lady's plot to escape appears to me no extraordinary
one there was much more luck than probability that it should do since 
to make it succeed it was necessary that dorcas and will and sinclair
and her nymphs should be all deceived or off their guard it belongs
to me when i see them to give them my hearty thanks that they were and
that their selfish care to provide for their own future security should
induce them to leave their outward door upon their bolt-latch and be
curs'd to them 

mabell deserves a pitch suit and a bonfire rather than the lustring and
as her clothes are returned le the lady's be put to her others to be
sent to her when it can be told whither but not till i give the word
neither for we must get the dear fugitive back again if possible 

i suppose that my stupid villain who knew not such a goddess-shaped lady
with a mien so noble from the awkward and bent-shouldered mabell has
been at hampstead to see after her and yet i hardly think she would go
thither he ought to go through every street where bills for lodgings
are up to inquire after a new-comer the houses of such as deal in
women's matters and tea coffee and such-like are those to be inquired
at for her if some tidings be not quickly heard of her i would not
have either dorcas will or mabell appear in my sight whatever their
superiors think fit to do 

this though written in character is a very long letter considering it
is not a narrative one or a journal of proceedings like most of my
former for such will unavoidably and naturally as i may say run into
length but i have so used myself to write a great deal of late that i
know not how to help it yet i must add to its length in order to
explain myself on a hint i gave at the beginning of it which was that i
have another disappointment besides this of miss harlowe's escape to
bemoan 

and what dost thou think it is why the old peer pox of his tough
constitution for that malady would have helped him on has made shift
by fire and brimstone and the devil knows what to force the gout to
quit the counterscarp of his stomach just as it had collected all its
strength in order to storm the citadel of his heart in short they
have by the mere force of stink-pots hand-granades and pop-guns 
driven the slow-working pioneer quite out of the trunk into the
extremities and there it lies nibbling and gnawing upon his great toe 
when i had a fair end of the distemper and the distempered 

but i who could write to thee of laudanum and the wet cloth formerly 
yet let 8000  a year slip through my fingers when i had entered upon it
more than in imagination  for i had begun to ask the stewards questions 
and to hear them talk of fines and renewals and such sort of stuff  
deserve to be mortified 

thou canst not imagine how differently the servants and even my cousins 
look upon me since yesterday to what they did before neither the one
nor the other bow or courtesy half so low nor am i a quarter so often
his honour and your honour as i was within these few hours with the
former and as to the latter it is cousin bobby again with the usual
familiarity instead of sir and sir and if you please mr lovelace 
and now they have the insolence to congratulate me on the recovery of the
best of uncles while i am forced to seem as much delighted as they 
when would it do me good i could sit down and cry my eyes out 

i had bespoke my mourning in imagination after the example of a certain
foreign minister who before the death or even last illness of charles
ii as honest white kennet tells us had half exhausted blackwell-hall
of its sables an indication as the historian would insinuate that the
monarch was to be poisoned and the ambassador in the secret and yet 
fool that i was i could not take the hint what the devil does a man
read history for if he cannot profit by the examples he find in it 

but thus jack is an observation of the old peer's verified that one
misfortune seldom comes alone and so concludes

thy doubly mortified
lovelace 



letter l

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
wednesday night june 28 


o my dearest miss howe 

once more have i escaped but alas i my best self have not escaped 
 oh your poor clarissa harlowe you also will hate me i fear 

yet you won't when you know all 

but no more of my self my lost self you that can rise in a morning to
be blest and to bless and go to rest delighted with your own
reflections and in your unbroken unstarting slumbers conversing with
saints and angels the former only more pure than yourself as they have
shaken off the incumbrance of body you shall be my subject as you have
long long been my only pleasure and let me at awful distance revere
my beloved anna howe and in her reflect upon what her clarissa harlowe
once was 


 


forgive o forgive my rambling my peace is destroyed my intellects
are touched and what flighty nonsense must you read if you now will
vouchsafe to correspond with me as formerly 

o my best my dearest my only friend what a tale have i to unfold 
but still upon self this vile this hated self i will shake it off if
possible and why should i not since i think except one wretch i hate
nothing so much self then be banished from self one moment for i
doubt it will be for no longer to inquire after a dearer object my
beloved anna howe whose mind all robed in spotless white charms and
irradiates but what would i say 


 


and how my dearest friend after this rhapsody which on re-perusal i
would not let go but to show you what a distracted mind dictates to my
trembling pen how do you you have been very ill it seems that you
are recovered my dear let me hear that your mother is well pray let
me hear and hear quickly this comfort surely is owing to me for if
life is no worse than chequer-work i must now have a little white to
come having seen nothing but black all unchequered dismal black for a
great great while 


 


and what is all this wild incoherence for it is only to beg to know how
you have been and how you do now by a line directed for mrs rachel
clark at mr smith's a glove-shop in king-street covent-garden which
 although my abode is secret to every body else will reach the hands of
 your unhappy but that's not enough 

your miserable
clarissa harlowe 



letter li

mrs howe to miss clarissa harlowe
 superscribed as directed in the preceding  
friday june 30 


miss clarissa harlowe 

you will wonder to receive a letter from me i am sorry for the great
distress you seem to be in such a hopeful young lady as you were but
see what comes of disobedience to parents 

for my part although i pity you yet i much more pity your poor father
and mother such education as they gave you such improvement as you
made and such delight as they took in you and all come to this 

but pray miss don't make my nancy guilt of your fault which is that of
disobedience i have charged her over and over not to correspond with
one who had made such a giddy step it is not to her reputation i am
sure you know that i so charged her yet you go on corresponding
together to my very great vexation for she has been very perverse upon
it more than once evil communication miss you know the rest 

here people cannot be unhappy by themselves but they must invoke their
friends and acquaintance whose discretion has kept them clear of their
errors into near as much unhappiness as if they had run into the like
of their own heads thus my poor daughter is always in tears and grief 
and she has postponed her own felicity truly because you are unhappy 

if people who seek their own ruin could be the only sufferers by their
headstrong doings it were something but o miss miss what have you to
answer for who have made as many grieved hearts as have known you the
whole sex is indeed wounded by you for who but miss clarissa harlowe
was proposed by every father and mother for a pattern for their
daughters 

i write a long letter where i proposed to say but a few words and those
to forbid your writing to my nancy and this as well because of the false
step you have made as because it will grieve her poor heart and do you
no good if you love her therefore write not to her your sad letter
came into my hands nancy being abroad and i shall not show it her for
there would be no comfort for her if she saw it nor for me whose
delight she is as you once was to your parents 

but you seem to be sensible enough of your errors now so are all giddy
girls when it is too late and what a crest-fallen figure then do the
consequences of their self-willed obstinacy and headstrongness compel
them to make 

i may say too much only as i think it proper to bear that testimony
against your rashness which it behoves every careful parent to bear and
none more than

your compassionating well-wishing
annabella howe 

i send this by a special messenger who has business only so far as
 barnet because you shall have no need to write again knowing how
 you love writing and knowing likewise that misfortune makes people
 plaintive 



letter lii

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs howe 
saturday july 1 


permit me madam to trouble you with a few lines were it only to thank
you for your reproofs which have nevertheless drawn fresh streams of
blood from a bleeding heart 

my story is a dismal story it has circumstances in it that would engage
pity and possibly a judgment not altogether unfavourable were those
circumstances known but it is my business and shall be all my
business to repent of my failings and not endeavour to extenuate them 

nor will i seek to distress your worthy mind if i cannot suffer alone 
i will make as few parties as i can in my sufferings and indeed i
took up my pen with this resolution when i wrote the letter which has
fallen into your hands it was only to know and that for a very
particular reason as well as for affection unbounded if my dear miss
howe from whom i had not heard of a long time were ill as i had been
told she was and if so how she now does but my injuries being recent 
and my distresses having been exceeding great self would crowd into my
letter when distressed the human mind is apt to turn itself to every
one in whom it imagined or wished an interest for pity and consolation 
 or to express myself better and more concisely in your own words 
misfortune makes people plaintive and to whom if not to a friend can
the afflicted complain 

miss howe being abroad when my letter came i flatter myself that she is
recovered but it would be some satisfaction to me to be informed if she
has been ill another line from your hand would be too great a favour 
but if you will be pleased to direct any servant to answer yes or no to
that question i will not be farther troublesome 

nevertheless i must declare that my miss howe's friendship was all the
comfort i had or expected to have in this world and a line from her
would have been a cordial to my fainting heart judge then dearest
madam how reluctantly i must obey your prohibition but yet i will
endeavour to obey it although i should have hoped as well from the
tenor of all that has passed between miss howe and me as from her
established virtue that she could not be tainted by evil communication 
had one or two letters been permitted this however i ask not for 
since i think i have nothing to do but to beg of god who i hope has
not yet withdrawn his grace from me although he has pleaded to let loose
his justice upon my faults to give me a truly broken spirit if it be
not already broken enough and then to take to his mercy

the unhappy
clarissa harlowe 

two favours good madam i have to beg of you the first that you will
 not let any of my relations know that you have heard from me the
 other that no living creature be apprized where i am to be heard of 
 or directed to this is a point that concerns me more than i can
 express in short my preservation from further evils may depend upon
 it 



letter liii

miss clarissa harlowe to hannah burton
thursday june 29 


my good hannah 

strange things have happened to me since you were dismissed my service
 so sorely against my will and your pert fellow servant set over me 
but that must all be forgotten now 

how do you my hannah are you recovered of your illness if you are 
do you choose to come and be with me or can you conveniently 

i am a very unhappy creature and being among all strangers should be
very glad to have you with me of whose fidelity and love i have had so
many acceptable instances 

living or dying i will endeavour to make it worth your while my hannah 

if you are recovered as i hope and if you have a good place it may be
they would bear with your absence and suffer somebody in your room for a
month or so and by that time i hope to be provided for and you may
then return to your place 

don't let any of my friends know of this my desire whether you can come
or not 

i am at mr smith's a hosier's and glove shop in king-street 
covent-garden 

you must direct to me by the name of rachel clark 

do my good hannah come if you can to your poor young mistress who
always valued you and always will whether you come or not 

i send this to your mother at st alban's not knowing where to direct
to you return me a line that i may know what to depend upon and i
shall see you have not forgotten the pretty hand you were taught in
happy days by

your true friend 
clarissa harlowe 



letter liv

hannah burton
 in answer  
monday july 3 


honored maddam 

i have not forgot to write and never will forget any thing you my dear
young lady was so good as to larn me i am very sorrowful for your
misfortens my dearest young lady so sorrowfull i do not know what to
do gladd at harte would i be to be able to come to you but indeed i
have not been able to stir out of my rome here at my mother's ever since
i was forsed to leave my plase with a roomatise which has made me quite
and clene helpless i will pray for you night and day my dearest my
kindest my goodest young lady who have been so badly used and i am
very sorry i cannot come to do you love and sarvice which will ever be
in the harte of mee to do if it was in my power who am

your most dutiful servant to command 
hannah burton 



letter lv

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs judith norton
thursday june 29 


my dear mrs norton 

i address myself to you after a very long silence which however was
not owing either to want of love or duty principally to desire you to
satisfy me in two or three points which it behoves me to know 

my father and all the family i am informed are to be at my uncle
harlowe's this day as usual pray acquaint me if they have been there 
and if they were cheerful on the anniversary occasion and also if you
have heard of any journey or intended journey of my brother in company
with captain singleton and mr solmes 

strange things have happened to me my dear worthy and maternal friend 
very strange things mr lovelace has proved a very barbarous and
ungrateful man to me but god be praised i have escaped from him 
being among absolute strangers though i think worthy folks i have
written to hannah burton to come and be with me if the good creature
fall in your way pray encourage her to come to me i always intended
to have her she knows but hoped to be in happier circumstances 

say nothing to any of my friends that you have heard from me 

pray do you think my father would be prevailed upon if i were to
supplicate him by letter to take off the heavy curse he laid upon me at
my going from harlowe-place i can expect no other favour from him but
that being literally fulfilled as to my prospects in this life i hope it
will be thought to have operated far enough and my heart is so weak it
is very weak but for my father's own sake what should i say indeed i
hardly know how i ought to express myself on this sad subject but it
will give ease to my mind to be released from it 

i am afraid my poor as i used to call the good creatures to whose
necessities i was wont to administer by your faithful hands have missed
me of late but now alas i am poor myself it is not the least
aggravation of my fault nor of my regrets that with such inclinations
as god has given me i have put it our of my power to do the good i once
pleased myself to think i was born to do it is a sad thing my dearest
mrs nortin to render useless to ourselves and the world by our own
rashness the talents which providence has intrusted to us for the
service of both 

but these reflections are now too late and perhaps i ought to have kept
them to myself let me however hope that you love me still pray let
me hope that you do and then notwithstanding my misfortunes which
have made me seem ungrateful to the kind and truly maternal pains you
have taken with me from my cradle i shall have the happiness to think
that there is one worthy person who hates not

the unfortunate
clarissa harlowe 

pray remember me to my foster-brother i hope he continues dutiful and
 good to you 
be pleased to direct for rachel clark at mr smith's in king-street 
 covent-garden but keep the direction an absolute secret 



letter lvi

mrs norton
 in answer  
saturday july 1 


your letter my dearest young lady cuts me to the heart why will you
not let me know all your distresses yet you have said enough 

my son is very good to me a few hours ago he was taken with a feverish
disorder but i hope it will go off happily if his ardour for business
will give him the recess from it which his good master is willing to
allow him he presents his duty to you and shed tears at hearing your
sad letter read 

you have been misinformed as to your family's being at your uncle
harlowe's they did not intend to be there nor was the day kept at
all indeed they have not stirred out but to church and that but
three times ever since the day you went away unhappy day for them and
for all who know you to me i am sure most particularly so my heart
now bleeds more and more for you 

i have not heard a syllable of such a journey as you mentioned of your
brother captain singleton and mr solmes there has been some talk
indeed of your brother's setting out for his northern estates but i have
not heard of it lately 

i am afraid no letter will be received from you it grieves me to tell
you so my dearest young lady no evil can have happened to you which
they do not expect to hear of so great is their antipathy to the wicked
man and so bad is his character 

i cannot but think hardly of their unforgiveness but there is no judging
for others by one's self nevertheless i will add that if you had had
as gentle spirits as mine these evils had never happened either to them
or to you i knew your virtue and your love of virtue from your very
cradle and i doubted not but that with god's grace would always be
your guard but you could never be driven nor was there occasion to
drive you so generous so noble so discreet but how does my love of
your amiable qualities increase my affliction as these recollections
must do your's 

you are escaped my dearest miss happily i hope that is to say with
your honour else how great must be your distress yet from your
letter i dread the worst 

i am very seldom at harlowe-place the house is not the house it used to
be since you went from it then they are so relentless and as i
cannot say harsh things of the beloved child of my heart as well as
bosom they do not take it amiss that i stay away 

your hannah left her place ill some time ago and as she is still at her
mother's at st alban's i am afraid she continues ill if so as you
are among strangers and i cannot encourage you at present to come into
these parts i shall think it my duty to attend you let it be taken as
it will as soon as my tommy's indisposition will permit which i hope
will be soon 

i have a little money by me you say you are poor yourself how
grievous are those words from one entitled and accustomed to affluence 
will you be so good to command it my beloved young lady it is most of
it your own bounty to me and i should take a pride to restore it to its
original owner 

your poor bless you and pray for you continually i have so managed
your last benevolence and they have been so healthy and have had such
constant employ that it has held out and will hold out till the happier
times return which i continually pray for 

let me beg of you my dearest young lady to take to yourself all those
aids which good persons like you draw from religion in support of
their calamities let your sufferings be what they will i am sure you
have been innocent in your intention so do not despond none are made
to suffer above what they can and therefore ought to bear 

we know not the methods of providence nor what wise ends it may have to
serve in its seemingly-severe dispensations to its poor creatures 

few persons have greater reason to say this than myself and since we
are apt in calamities to draw more comfort from example than precept you
will permit me to remind you of my own lot for who has had a greater
share of afflictions than myself 

to say nothing of the loss of an excellent mother at a time of life when
motherly care is most wanted the death of a dear father who was an
ornament to his cloth and who had qualified me to be his scribe and
amanuensis just as he came within view of a preferment which would have
made his family easy threw me friendless into the wide world threw me
upon a very careless and which was much worse a very unkind husband 
poor man but he was spared long enough thank god in a tedious
illness to repent of his neglected opportunities and his light
principles which i have always thought of with pleasure although i was
left the more destitute for his chargeable illness and ready to be
brought to bed when he died of my tommy 

but this very circumstance which i thought the unhappiest that i could
have been left in so short-sighted is human prudence became the happy
means of recommending me to your mother who in regard to my character 
and in compassion to my very destitute circumstances permitted me as i
made a conscience of not parting with my poor boy to nurse both you and
him born within a few days of each other and i have never since wanted
any of the humble blessings which god has made me contented with 


nor have i known what a very great grief was from the day of my poor
husband's death till the day that your parents told me how much they were
determined that you should have mr solmes when i was apprized not only
of your aversion to him but how unworthy he was of you for then i began
to dread the consequences of forcing so generous a spirit and till
then i never feared mr lovelace attracting as was his person and
specious his manners and address for i was sure you would never have
him if he gave you not good reason to be convinced of his reformation 
nor till your friends were as well satisfied in it as yourself but that
unhappy misunderstanding between your brother and mr lovelace and their
joining so violently to force you upon mr solmes did all that mischief 
which has cost you and them so dear and poor me all my peace oh what
has not this ungrateful this double-guilty man to answer for 

nevertheless you know not what god has in store for you yet but if you
are to be punished all your days here for example sake in a case of
such importance for your one false step be pleased to consider that
this life is but a state of probation and if you have your purification
in it you will be the more happy nor doubt i that you will have the
higher reward hereafter for submitting to the will of providence here
with patience and resignation 

you see my dearest miss clary that i make no scruple to call the step
you took a false one in you it was less excusable than it would have
been in any other young lady not only because of your superior talents 
but because of the opposition between your character and his so that if
you had been provoked to quit your father's house it need not to have
been with him nor needed i indeed but as an instance of my impartial
love to have written this to you 


 mrs norton having only the family representation and invectives to
form her judgment upon knew not that clarissa had determined against
going off with mr lovelace nor how solicitous she had been to procure
for herself any other protection than his when she apprehended that if
she staid she had no way to avoid being married to mr solmes 


after this it will have an unkind and perhaps at this time an
unseasonable appearance to express my concern that you have not before
favoured me with a line yet if you can account to yourself for your
silence i dare say i ought to be satisfied for i am sure you love me 
as i both love and honour you and ever will and the more for your
misfortunes 

one consolation methinks i have even when i am sorrowing for your
calamities and that is that i know not any young person so qualified to
shine the brighter for the trials she may be exercised with and yet it
is a consolation that ends in adding to my regrets for your afflictions 
because you are blessed with a mind so well able to bear prosperity and
to make every body round you the better for it but i will forbear till
i know more 

ruminating on every thing your melancholy letter suggests and
apprehending from the gentleness of your mind the amiableness of your
person and your youth the farther misfortunes and inconveniencies to
which you may possibly be subjected i cannot conclude without asking for
your leave to attend you and that in a very earnest manner and i beg of
you not to deny me on any consideration relating to myself or even to
the indisposition of my other beloved child if i can be either of use or
of comfort to you were it my dearest young lady but for two or three
days permit me to attend you although my son's illness should increase 
and compel me to come down again at the end of those two or three days 
i repeat my request likewise that you will command from me the little
sum remaining in the hands of your bounty to your poor as well as that
dispensed to

your ever-affectionate and faithful servant 
judith norton 



letter lvii

miss cl harlowe to lady betty lawrance
thursday june 29 


madam 

i hope you'll excuse the freedom of this address from one who has not
the honour to be personally known to you although you must have heard
much of clarissa harlowe it is only to beg the favour of a line from
your ladyship's hand by the next post if convenient in answer to the
following questions 

1 whether you wrote a letter dated as i have a memorandum wedn june
 7 congratulating your nephew lovelace on his supposed nuptials as
 reported to you by mr spurrier your ladyship's steward as from one
 captain tomlinson and in it reproaching mr lovelace as guilty of
 slight etc in not having acquainted your ladyship and the family
 with his marriage 

2 whether your ladyship wrote to miss montague to meet you at reading 
 in order to attend you to your cousin leeson's in albemarle-street 
 on your being obliged to be in town on your old chancery affair i
 remember are the words and whether you bespoke your nephew's
 attendance there on sunday night the 11th 

3 whether your ladyship and miss montague did come to town at that
 time and whether you went to hampstead on monday in a hired coach
 and four your own being repairing and took from thence to town with
 the young creature whom you visited there 

your ladyship will probably guess that the questions are not asked for
reasons favourable to your nephew lovelace but be the answer what it
will it can do him no hurt nor me any good only that i think i owe it
to my former hopes however deceived in them and even to charity that
a person of whom i was once willing to think better should not prove so
egregiously abandoned as to be wanting in every instance to that
veracity which is indispensable in the character of a gentleman 

be pleased madam to direct to me keeping the direction a secret for
the present to be left at the belle-savage on ludgate hill till
called for i am

your ladyship's most humble servant 
clarissa harlowe 



letter lviii

lady betty lawrance to miss cl harlowe
saturday july 1 


dear madam 

i find that all is not as it should be between you and my nephew
lovelace it will very much afflict me and all his friends if he has
been guilty of any designed baseness to a lady of your character and
merit 

we have been long in expectation of an opportunity to congratulate you
and ourselves upon an event most earnestly wished for by us all since
our hopes of him are built upon the power you have over him for if ever
man adored a woman he is that man and you madam are that woman 

miss montague in her last letter to me in answer to one of mine 
inquiring if she knew from him whether he could call you his or was
likely soon to have that honour has these words i know not what to
make of my cousin lovelace as to the point your ladyship is so earnest
about he sometimes says he is actually married to miss cl harlowe at
other times that it is her own fault if he be not he speaks of her not
only with love but with reverence yet owns that there is a
misunderstanding between them but confesses that she is wholly
faultless an angel and not a woman he says she is and that no man
living can be worthy of her  

this is what my niece montague writes 

god grant my dearest young lady that he may not have so heinously
offended you that you cannot forgive him if you are not already
married and refuse to be his i shall lose all hopes that he ever will
marry or be the man i wish him to be so will lord m so will lady
sarah sadleir 

i will now answer your questions but indeed i hardly know what to write 
for fear of widening still more the unhappy difference between you but
yet such a young lady must command every thing from me this then is my
answer 

i wrote not any letter to him on or about the 7th of june 

neither i nor my steward know any such man as captain tomlinson 

i wrote not to my niece to meet me at reading nor to accompany me to my
 cousin leeson's in town 

my chancery affair though like most chancery affairs it be of long
 standing is nevertheless now in so good a way that it cannot
 give me occasion to go to town 

nor have i been in town these six months nor at hampstead for
 years 

neither shall i have any temptation to go to town except to pay my
 congratulatory compliments to mrs lovelace on which occasion i
 should go with the greatest pleasure and should hope for the
 favour of your accompanying me to glenham-hall for a month at
 least 

be what will the reason of your inquiry let me entreat you my dear
young lady for lord m s sake for my sake for this giddy man's sake 
soul as well as body and for all our family's sakes not to suffer this
answer to widen differences so far as to make you refuse him if he
already has not the honour of calling you his as i am apprehensive he
has not by your signing by your family-name 

and here let me offer to you my mediation to compose the difference
between you be it what it will your cause my dear young lady cannot
be put into the hands of any body living more devoted to your service 
than into those of

your sincere admirer and humble servant 
eliz lawrance 



letter lix

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs hodges
enfield june 22 


mrs hodges 

i am under a kind of necessity to write to you having no one among my
relations to whom i dare write or hope a line from if i did it is but
to answer a question it is this 

whether you know any such man as captain tomlinson and if you do 
whether he be very intimate with my uncle harlowe 

i will describe his person lest possibly he should go by another name
among you although i know not why he should 

he is a thin tallish man a little pock-fretten of a sallowish
complexion fifty years of age or more of good aspect when he looks
up he seems to be a serious man and one who knows the world he
stoops a little in the shoulders is of berkshire his wife of
oxfordshire and has several children he removed lately into your parts
form northamptonshire 

i must desire you mrs hodges that you will not let my uncle nor any
of my relations know that i write to you 

you used to say that you would be glad to have it in your power to serve
me that indeed was in my prosperity but i dare say you will not
refuse me in a particular that will oblige me without hurting yourself 

i understand that my father mother and sister and i presume my
brother and my uncle antony are to be at my uncle harlowe's this day 
god preserve them all and may they rejoice in many happy birth-days 
you will write six words to me concerning their healths 

direct for a particular reason to mrs dorothy salcombe to be left
till called for at the four swans inn bishopsgate-street 

you know my hand-writing well enough were not the contents of the letter
sufficient to excuse my name or any other subscription than that of

your friend 



letter lx

mrs hodges
 in answer  
sat july 2 


maddam 

i return you an anser as you wish me to doe master is acquented with
no sitch man i am shure no sitch ever came to our house and master
sturs very little out he has no harte to stur out for why your
obstinacy makes um not care to see one another master's birth-day never
was kept soe before for not a sole heere and nothing but sikeing and
sorrowin from master to think how it yused to bee 

i axed master if soe bee he knowed sitch a man as one captain tomlinson 
but said not whirfor i axed he sed no not he 

shure this is no trix nor forgery bruing against master by one tomlinson
 won knows not what company you may have been forsed to keep sen you
went away you knoe maddam but lundon is a pestilent plase and that
squire luvless is a devil for all he is sitch a like gentleman to look
to as i hev herd every boddy say and think as how you have found by
thiss 

i truste maddam you wulde not let master cum to harme if you knoed it 
by any body who may pretend to be acquented with him but for fere i
querid with myself if i shulde not tell him but i was willin to show
you that i wulde plessure you in advarsity if advarsity be your lott 
as well as prosperity for i am none of those that woulde doe otherwiss 
soe no more from

your humble sarvent to wish you well 
sarah hodges 



letter lxi

miss cl harlowe to lady betty lawrance 
monday july 3 


madam 

i cannot excuse myself from giving your ladyship this one trouble more 
to thank you as i most heartily do for your kind letter 

i must own to you madam that the honour of being related to ladies as
eminent for their virtue as for their descent was at first no small
inducement with me to lend an ear to mr lovelace's address and the
rather as i was determined had it come to effect to do every thing in
my power to deserve your favourable opinion 

i had another motive which i knew would of itself give me merit with
your whole family a presumptuous one a punishably presumptuous one as
it has proved in the hope that i might be an humble mean in the hand of
providence to reclaim a man who had as i thought good sense enough to
acknowledge the intended obligation whether the generous hope were to
succeed or not 

but i have been most egregiously mistaken in mr lovelace the only man 
i persuade myself pretending to be a gentleman in whom i could have
been so much mistaken for while i was endeavouring to save a drowning
wretch i have been not accidentally but premeditatedly and of set
purpose drawn in after him and he has had the glory to add to the list
of those he has ruined a name that i will be bold to say would not
have disparaged his own and this madam by means that would shock
humanity to be made acquainted with 

my whole end is served by your ladyship's answer to the questions i took
the liberty to put to you in writing nor have i a wish to make the
unhappy man more odious to you than is necessary to excuse myself for
absolutely declining your offered mediation 

when your ladyship shall be informed of the following particulars 

that after he had compulsorily as i may say tricked me into the act of
going off with him he could carry me to one of the vilest houses as it
proved in london 

that he could be guilty of a wicked attempt in resentment of which i
found means to escape from him to hampstead 

that after he had found me out there i know not how he could procure
two women dressed out richly to personate your ladyship and miss
montague who under pretence of engaging me to make a visit in town to
your cousin leeson promising to return with me that evening to
hampstead betrayed me back again to the vile house where again made a
prisoner i was first robbed of my senses and then of my honour why
should i seek to conceal that disgrace from others which i cannot hide
from myself 

when your ladyship shall know that in the shocking progress to this
ruin wilful falsehoods repeated forgeries particularly of one letter
from your ladyship another from miss montague and a third from lord m 
and numberless perjuries were not the least of his crimes you will
judge that i can have no principles that will make me worthy of an
alliance with ladies of your's and your noble sister's character if i
could not from my soul declare that such an alliance can never now take
place 

i will not offer to clear myself entirely of blame but as to him i
have no fault to accuse myself of my crime was the corresponding with
him at first when prohibited so to do by those who had a right to my
obedience made still more inexcusable by giving him a clandestine
meeting which put me into the power of his arts and for this i am
content to be punished thankful that at last i have escaped from him 
and have it in my power to reject so wicked a man for my husband and
glad if i may be a warning since i cannot be an example which once
 very vain and very conceited as i was i proposed to myself to be 

all the ill i wish him is that he may reform and that i may be the last
victim to his baseness perhaps this desirable wish may be obtained 
when he shall see how his wickedness his unmerited wickedness to a poor
creature made friendless by his cruel arts will end 

i conclude with my humble thanks to your ladyship for your favourable
opinion of me and with the assurance that i will be while life is lent
me 

your ladyship's grateful and obliged servant 
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxii

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs norton
sunday evening july 2 


how kindly my beloved mrs norton do you soothe the anguish of a
bleeding heart surely you are mine own mother and by some
unaccountable mistake i must have been laid to a family that having
newly found out or at least suspected the imposture cast me from their
hearts with the indignation that such a discovery will warrant 

oh that i had been indeed your own child born to partake of your humble
fortunes an heiress only to that content in which you are so happy then
should i have had a truly gentle spirit to have guided my ductile heart 
which force and ungenerous usage sit so ill upon and nothing of what has
happened would have been 

but let me take heed that i enlarge not by impatience the breach
already made in my duty by my rashness since had i not erred my
mother at least could never have been thought hard-hearted and
unforgiving am i not then answerable not only for my own faults but
for the consequences of them which tend to depreciate and bring disgrace
upon a maternal character never before called in question 

it is kind however in you to endeavour to extenuate the faults of one
so greatly sensible of it and could it be wiped off entirely it would
render me more worthy of the pains you have taken in my education for it
must add to your grief as it does to my confusion that after such
promising beginnings i should have so behaved as to be a disgrace
instead of a credit to you and my other friends 

but that i may not make you think me more guilty than i am give me leave
briefly to assure you that when my story is known i shall be
to more compassion than blame even on the score of going away with mr 
lovelace 

as to all that happened afterwards let me only say that although i must
call myself a lost creature as to this world yet have i this consolation
left me that i have not suffered either for want of circumspection or
through careful credulity or weakness not one moment was i off my
guard or unmindful of your early precepts but having been enabled to
baffle many base contrivances i was at last ruined by arts the most
inhuman but had i not been rejected by every friend this low-hearted
man had not dared nor would have had opportunity to treat me as he has
treated me 

more i cannot at this time nor need i say and this i desire you to
keep to yourself lest resentments should be taken up when i am gone 
that may spread the evil which i hope will end with me 

i have been misinformed you say as to my principal relations being at
my uncle harlowe's the day you say was not kept nor have my brother
and mr solmes astonishing what complicated wickedness has this
wretched man to answer for were i to tell you you would hardly believe
that there could have been such a heart in man 

but one day you may know the whole story at present i have neither
inclination nor words o my bursting heart yet a happy a wished
relief were you present my tears would supply the rest 


 


i resume my pen 

and so you fear no letter will be received from me but don't grieve to
tell me so i expect every thing bad and such is my distress that had
you not bid me hope for mercy from the throne of mercy i should have
been afraid that my father's dreadful curse would be completed with
regard to both worlds 

for here an additional misfortune in a fit of phrensical heedlessness 
i sent a letter to my beloved miss howe without recollecting her private
address and it has fallen into her angry mother's hands and so that
dear friend perhaps has anew incurred displeasure on my account and
here too your worthy son is ill and my poor hannah you think cannot
come to me o my dear mrs norton will you can you censure those whose
resentments against me heaven seems to approve of and will you acquit
her whom that condemns 

yet you bid me not despond i will not if i can help it and indeed 
most seasonable consolation has your kind letter afforded me yet to god
almighty do i appeal to avenge my wrongs and vindicate my inno 

but hushed be my stormy passions have i not but this moment said that
your letter gave me consolation may those be forgiven who hinder my
father from forgiving me and this as to them shall be the harshest
thing that shall drop from my pen 

but although your son should recover i charge you my dear mrs norton 
that you do not think of coming to me i don't know still but your
mediation with my mother although at present your interposition would be
so little attended to may be of use to procure me the revocation of that
most dreadful part of my father's curse which only remains to be
fulfilled the voice of nature must at last be heard in my favour 
surely it will only plead at first to my friends in the still conscious
plaintiveness of a young and unhardened beggar but it will grow more
clamorous when i have the courage to be so and shall demand perhaps 
the paternal protection from farther ruin and that forgiveness which
those will be little entitled to expect for their own faults who shall
interpose to have it refused to me for an accidental not a premeditated
error and which but for them i had never fallen into 

but again impatiency founded perhaps on self-partiality that strange
misleader prevails 

let me briefly say that it is necessary to my present and future hopes
that you keep well with my family and moreover should you come i may
be traced out by that means by the most abandoned of men say not then
that you think you ought to come up to me let it be taken as it will 
for my sake let me repeat were my foster-brother recovered as i hope
he is you must not come nor can i want your advice while i can
write and you can answer me and write i will as often as i stand in
need of your counsel 

then the people i am now with seem to be both honest and humane and
there is in the same house a widow-lodger of low fortunes but of great
merit almost such another serious and good woman as the dear one to
whom i am now writing who has as she says given over all other
thoughts of the world but such as should assist her to leave it happily 
 how suitable to my own views there seems to be a comfortable
providence in this at least so that at present there is nothing of
exigence nothing that can require or even excuse your coming when so
many better ends may be answered by your staying where you are a time
may come when i shall want your last and best assistance and then my
dear mrs norton and then i will speak it and embrace it with all my
whole heart and then will it not be denied me by any body 

you are very obliging in your offer of money but although i was forced
to leave my clothes behind me yet i took several things of value with
me which will keep me from present want you'll say i have made a
miserable hand of it so indeed i have and to look backwards in a very
little while too 

but what shall i do if my father cannot be prevailed upon to recall his
malediction o my dear mrs norton what a weight must a father's curse
have upon a heart so appreciative as mine did i think i should ever
have a father's curse to deprecate and yet only that the temporary
part of it is so terribly fulfilled or i should be as earnest for its
recall for my father's sake as for my own 

you must not be angry with me that i wrote not to you before you are
very right and very kind to say you are sure i love you indeed i do 
and what a generosity  so like yourself   is there in your praise to
attribute to me more than i merit in order to raise an emulation to me
to deserve your praises you tell me what you expect from me in the
calamities i am called upon to bear may i behave answerably 

i can a little account to myself for my silence to you my kind my dear
maternal friend how equally sweetly and politely do you express
yourself on this occasion i was very desirous for your sake as well
as for my own that you should have it to say that we did not correspond 
had they thought we did every word you could have dropt in my favour
would have been rejected and my mother would have been forbid to see
you or pay any regard to what you should say 

then i had sometimes better and sometimes worse prospects before me my
worst would only have troubled you to know my better made me frequently
hope that by the next post or the next and so on for weeks i should
have the best news to impart to you that then could happen cold as the
wretch had made my heart to that best for how could i think to write to
you with a confession that i was not married yet lived in the house
 for i could not help it with such a man who likewise had given it out
to several that we were actually married although with restrictions
that depended on the reconciliation with my friends and to disguise the
truth or be guilty of a falsehood either direct or equivocal that was
what you had never taught me 

but i might have written to you for advice in my precarious situation 
perhaps you will think but indeed my dear mrs norton i was not lost
for want of advice and this will appear clear to you from what i have
already hinted were i to explain myself no further for what need had
the cruel spoiler to have recourse to unprecedented arts i will speak
out plainer still but you must not at present report it to stupifying
potions and to the most brutal and outrageous force had i been wanting
in my duty 

a few words more upon this grievous subject 

when i reflect upon all that has happened to me it is apparent that
this generally-supposed thoughtless seducer has acted by me upon a
regular and preconcerted plan of villany 

in order to set all his vile plots in motion nothing was wanting from
the first but to prevail upon me either by force or fraud to throw
myself into his power and when this was effected nothing less than the
intervention of the paternal authority which i had not deserved to be
exerted in my behalf could have saved me from the effect of his deep
machinations opposition from any other quarter would but too probably
have precipitated his barbarous and ungrateful violence and had you
yourself been with me i have reason now to think that somehow or other
you would have suffered in endeavouring to save me for never was there 
as now i see a plan of wickedness more steadily and uniformly pursued
than his has been against an unhappy creature who merited better of him 
but the almighty has thought fit according to the general course of his
providence to make the fault bring on its own punishment but surely not
in consequence of my father's dreadful imprecation that i might be
punished here   o my mamma norton pray with me if so that here it
stop   by the very wretch in whom i had placed my wicked confidence 

i am sorry for your sake to leave off so heavily yet the rest must be
brief 

let me desire you to be secret in what i have communicated to you at
least till you have my consent to divulge it 

god preserve to you your more faultless child 

i will hope for his mercy although i should not obtain that of any
earthly person 

and i repeat my prohibition you must not think of coming up to

your ever dutiful
cl harlowe 

the obliging person who left your's for me this day promised to call
 to-morrow to see if i should have any thing to return i would
 not lose so good an opportunity 



letter lxiii

mrs norton to miss clarissa harlowe
monday night july 3 


o the barbarous villany of this detestable man and is there a man in
the world who could offer violence to so sweet a creature 

and are you sure you are now out of his reach 

you command me to keep secret the particulars of the vile treatment you
have met with or else upon an unexpected visit which miss harlowe
favoured me with soon after i had received your melancholy letter i
should have been tempted to own i had heard from you and to have
communicated to her such parts of your two letters as would have
demonstrated your penitence and your earnestness to obtain the
revocation of your father's malediction as well as his protection from
outrages that may still be offered to you but then your sister would
probably have expected a sight of the letters and even to have been
permitted to take them with her to the family 

yet they must one day be acquainted with the sad story and it is
impossible but they must pity you and forgive you when they know your
early penitence and your unprecedented sufferings and that you have
fallen by the brutal force of a barbarous ravisher and not by the vile
arts of a seducing lover 

the wicked man gives it out at lord m s as miss harlowe tells me that
he is actually married to you yet she believes it not nor had i the
heart to let her know the truth 

she put it close to me whether i had not corresponded with you from the
time of your going away i could safely tell her as i did that i had
not but i said that i was well informed that you took extremely to
heart your father's imprecation and that if she would excuse me i
would say it would be a kind and sisterly part if she would use her
interest to get you discharged from it 

among other severe things she told me that my partial fondness for you
made me very little consider the honour of the rest of the family but 
if i had not heard this from you she supposed i was set on by miss howe 

she expressed herself with a good deal of bitterness against that young
lady who it seems every where and to every body for you must think
that your story is the subject of all conversations rails against your
family treating them as your sister says with contempt and even with
ridicule 

i am sorry such angry freedoms are taken for two reasons first because
such liberties never do any good i have heard you own that miss howe
has a satirical vein but i should hope that a young lady of her sense 
and right cast of mind must know that the end of satire is not to
exasperate but amend and should never be personal if it be as my
good father used to say it may make an impartial person suspect that the
satirist has a natural spleen to gratify which may be as great a fault
in him as any of those which he pretends to censure and expose in
others 

perhaps a hint of this from you will not be thrown away 

my second reason is that these freedoms from so warm a friend to you as
miss howe is known to be are most likely to be charged to your account 

my resentments are so strong against this vilest of men that i dare not
touch upon the shocking particulars which you mention of his baseness 
what defence indeed could there be against so determined a wretch 
after you was in his power i will only repeat my earnest supplication
to you that black as appearances are you will not despair your
calamities are exceeding great but then you have talents proportioned to
your trials this every body allows 

suppose the worst and that your family will not be moved in your favour 
your cousin morden will soon arrive as miss harlowe told me if he
should even be got over to their side he will however see justice done
you and then may you live an exemplary life making hundreds happy and
teaching young ladies to shun the snares in which you have been so
dreadfully entangled 

as to the man you have lost is an union with such a perjured heart as
his with such an admirable one as your's to be wished for a base 
low-hearted wretch as you justly call him with all his pride of
ancestry and more an enemy to himself with regard to his present and
future happiness than to you in the barbarous and ungrateful wrongs he
has done you i need not i am sure exhort you to despise such a man as
this since not to be able to do so would be a reflection upon a sex to
which you have always been an honour 

your moral character is untainted the very nature of your sufferings as
you will observe demonstrates that cheer up therefore your dear
heart and do not despair for is it not god who governs the world and
permits some things and directs others as he pleases and will he not
reward temporary sufferings innocently incurred and piously supported 
with eternal felicity and what my dear is this poor needle's point of
now to a boundless eternity 

my heart however labours under a double affliction for my poor boy is
very very bad a violent fever nor can it be brought to intermit pray
for him my dearest miss for his recovery if god see fit i hope god
will see fit if not how can i bear to suppose that pray for me that
he will give me that patience and resignation which i have been wishing
to you i am my dearest young lady 

your ever affectionate
judith norton 



letter lxiv

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs judith norton
thursday july 6 


i ought not especially at this time to add to your afflictions but yet
i cannot help communicating to you who now are my only soothing friend 
a new trouble that has befallen me 

i had but one friend in the world beside you and she is utterly
displeased with me it is grievous but for one moment to lie under a
beloved person's censure and this through imputations that affect one's
honour and prudence there are points so delicate you know my dear
mrs norton that it is a degree of dishonour to have a vindication of
one's self from them appear to be necessary in the present case my
misfortune is that i know not how to account but by guess so subtle
have been the workings of the dark spirit i have been unhappily entangled
by for some of the facts that i am called upon to explain 

miss howe in short supposes she has found a flaw in my character i
have just now received her severe letter but i shall answer it perhaps 
in better temper if i first consider your's for indeed my patience is
almost at an end and yet i ought to consider that faithful are the
wounds of a friend but so many things at once o my dear mrs norton 
how shall so young a scholar in the school of affliction be able to bear
such heavy and such various evils 

but to leave this subject for a while and turn to your letter 

i am very sorry miss howe is so lively in her resentments on my account 
i have always blamed her very freely for her liberties of this sort with
my friends i once had a good deal of influence over her kind heart and
she made all i said a law to her but people in calamity have little
weight in any thing or with any body prosperity and independence are
charming things on this account that they give force to the counsels of
a friendly heart while it is thought insolence in the miserable to
advise or so much as to remonstrate 

yet is miss howe an invaluable person and is it to be expected that she
should preserve the same regard for my judgment that she had before i
forfeited all title to discretion with what face can i take upon me to
reproach a want of prudence in her but if i can be so happy as to
re-establish myself in her ever-valued opinion i shall endeavour to
enforce upon her your just observation on this head 

you need not you say exhort me to despise such a man as him by whom i
have suffered indeed you need not for i would choose the cruellest
death rather than to be his and yet my dear mrs norton i will own to
you that once i could have loved him ungrateful man had he permitted
me to love him i once could have loved him yet he never deserved
love and was not this a fault but now if i can but keep out of his
hands and obtain a last forgiveness and that as well for the sake of my
dear friends' future reflections as for my own present comfort it is
all i wish for 

reconciliation with my friends i do not expect nor pardon from them at
least till in extremity and as a viaticum 

o my beloved mrs norton you cannot imagine what i have suffered but
indeed my heart is broken i am sure i shall not live to take possession
of that independence which you think would enable me to atone in some
measure for my past conduct 

while this is my opinion you may believe i shall not be easy till i can
obtain a last forgiveness 

i wish to be left to take my own course in endeavouring to procure this
grace yet know i not at present what that course shall be 

i will write but to whom is my doubt calamity has not yet given me
the assurance to address myself to my father my uncles well as they
once loved me are hard hearted they never had their masculine passions
humanized by the tender name of father of my brother i have no hope i
have then but my mother and my sister to whom i can apply and may i
not my dearest mamma be permitted to lift up my trembling eye to your
all-cheering and your once more than indulgent your fond eye in hopes
of seasonable mercy to the poor sick heart that yet beats with life drawn
from your own dearer heart especially when pardon only and not
restoration is implored 

yet were i able to engage my mother's pity would it not be a mean to
make her still more unhappy than i have already made her by the
opposition she would meet with were she to try to give force to that
pity 

to my sister then i think i will apply yet how hard-hearted has my
sister been but i will not ask for protection and yet i am in hourly
dread that i shall want protection all i will ask for at present
 preparative to the last forgiveness i will implore shall be only to be
freed from the heavy curse that seems to have operated as far is it can
operate as to this life and surely it was passion and not intention 
that carried it so far as to the other 

but why do i thus add to your distresses it is not my dear mrs 
norton that i have so much feeling for my own calamity that i have none
for your's since your's is indeed an addition to my own but you have
one consolation a very great one which i have not that your
afflictions whether respecting your more or your less deserving child 
rise not from any fault of your own 

but what can i do for you more than pray assure yourself that in every
supplication i put up for myself i will with equal fervour remember both
you and your son for i am and ever will be

your truly sympathising and dutiful
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxv

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
 superscribed for mrs rachel clark etc  
wednesday july 5 


my dear clarissa 

i have at last heard from you from a quarter i little expected 

from my mother 

she had for some time seen me uneasy and grieving and justly supposed it
was about you and this morning dropt a hint which made me conjecture
that she must have heard something of you more than i knew and when she
found that this added to my uneasiness she owned she had a letter in her
hands of your's dated the 29th of june directed for me 

you may guess that this occasioned a little warmth that could not be
wished for by either 

 it is surprising my dear mighty surprising that knowing the
prohibition i lay under of corresponding with you you could send a
letter for me to our own house since it must be fifty to one that it
would fall into my mother's hands as you find it did  

in short she resented that i should disobey her i was as much concerned
that she should open and withhold from me my letters and at last she was
pleased to compromise the matter with me by giving up the letter and
permitting me to write to you once or twice she to see the contents of
what i wrote for besides the value she has for you she could not but
have greater curiosity to know the occasion of so sad a situation as your
melancholy letter shows you to be in 

 but i shall get her to be satisfied with hearing me read what i write 
putting in between hooks thus    what i intend not to read to her  

need i to remind you miss clarissa harlowe of three letters i wrote to
you to none of which i had any answer except to the first and that of
a few lines only promising a letter at large though you were well
enough the day after you received my second to go joyfully back again
with him to the vile house but more of these by-and-by i must hasten
to take notice of your letter of wednesday last week which you could
contrive should fall into my mother's hands 

let me tell you that that letter has almost broken my heart good god 
 what have you brought yourself to miss clarissa harlowe could i have
believed that after you had escaped from the miscreant with such
mighty pains and earnestness escaped and after such an attempt as he
had made you would have been prevailed upon not only to forgive him but
 without being married too to return with him to that horrid house a
house i had given you such an account of surprising what an
intoxicating thing is this love i always feared that you even you 
were not proof against its inconsistent effects 

you your best self have not escaped indeed i see not how you could
expect to escape 

what a tale have you to unfold you need not unfold it my dear i would
have engaged to prognosticate all that has happened had you but told me
that you would once more have put yourself in his power after you had
taken such pains to get out of it 

your peace is destroyed i wonder not at it since now you must reproach
yourself for a credulity so ill-placed 

your intellect is touched i am sure my heart bleeds for you but 
excuse me my dear i doubt your intellect was touched before you left
hampstead or you would never have let him find you out there or when
he did suffer him to prevail upon you to return to the horrid brothel 

i tell you i sent you three letters the first of which dated the 7th
and 8th of june for it was written at twice came safely to your hands 
as you sent me word by a few lines dated the 9th had it not i should
have doubted my own safety since in it i give you such an account of the
abominable house and threw such cautions in your way in relation to
that tomlinson as the more surprised me that you could think of going
back to it again after you had escaped from it and from lovelace o
my dear but nothing now will i ever wonder at 


 see vol v letter xx 


the second dated june 10 was given into your own hand at hampstead on
sunday the 11th as you was lying upon a couch in a strange way 
according to my messenger's account of you bloated and flush-coloured 
i don't know how 


 see letter vii of this volume 


the third was dated the 20th of june having not heard one word from
you since the promising billet of the 9th i own i did not spare you in
it i ventured it by the usual conveyance by that wilson's having no
other so cannot be sure you received it indeed i rather think you
might not because in your's which fell into my mother's hands you make
no mention of it and if you had had it i believe it would have touched
you too much to have been passed by unnoticed 


 see letter xxx of this volume 


you have heard that i have been ill you say i had a cold indeed but
it was so slight a one that it confined me not an hour but i doubt not
that strange things you have heard and been told to induce you to take
the step you took and till you did take that step the going back with
this villain i mean i knew not a more pitiable case than your's since
every body must have excused you before who knew how you were used at
home and was acquainted with your prudence and vigilance but alas my
dear we see that the wisest people are not to be depended upon when
love like an ignis fatuus holds up its misleading lights before their
eyes 

my mother tells me she sent you an answer desiring you not to write to
me because it would grieve me to be sure i am grieved exceedingly
grieved and disappointed too you must permit me to say for i had
always thought that there never was such a woman at your years in the
world 

but i remember once an argument you held on occasion of a censure passed
in company upon an excellent preacher who was not a very excellent
liver preaching and practising you said required very different
talents which when united in the same person made the man a saint as
wit and judgment going together constituted a genius 


 see vol ii letter iv 


you made it out i remember very prettily but you never made it out 
excuse me my dear more convincingly than by that part of your late
conduct which i complain of 

my love for you and my concern for your honour may possibly have made
me a little of the severest if you think so place it to its proper
account to that love and to that concern which will but do justice
to

your afflicted and faithful
a h 

p s my mother would not be satisfied without reading my letter herself 
 and that before i had fixed all the proposed hooks she knows by
 this means and has excused our former correspondence 

she indeed suspected it before and so she very well might knowing my
 love of you 

she has so much real concern for your misfortunes that thinking it will
 be a consolation to you and that it will oblige me she consents
 that you shall write to me the particulars at large of your say
 story but it is on condition that i show her all that has passed
 between us relating to yourself and the vilest of men i have the
 more cheerfully complied as the communication cannot be to your
 disadvantage 

you may therefore write freely and direct to our own house 

my mother promises to show me the copy of her letter to you and your
 reply to it which latter she has but just told me of she already
 apologizes for the severity of her's and thinks the sight of your
 reply will affect me too much but having her promise i will not
 dispense with it 

i doubt her's is severe enough so i fear you will think mine but you
 have taught me never to spare the fault for the friend's sake and
 that a great error ought rather to be the more inexcusable in the
 person we value than in one we are indifferent to because it is a
 reflection upon our choice of that person and tends to a breach of
 the love of mind and to expose us to the world for our partiality 
 to the love of mind i repeat since it is impossible but the
 errors of the dearest friend must weaken our inward opinion of that
 friend and thereby lay a foundation for future distance and
 perhaps disgust 

god grant that you may be able to clear your conduct after you had
 escaped from hampstead as all before that time was noble 
 generous and prudent the man a devil and you a saint yet i
 hope you can and therefore expect it from you 

i send by a particular hand he will call for your answer at your own
 appointment 

i am afraid this horrid wretch will trace out by the post-offices where
 you are if not careful 

to have money and will and head to be a villain is too much for the
 rest of the world when they meet in one man 



letter lxvi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
thursday july 6 


few young persons have been able to give more convincing proofs than
myself how little true happiness lies in the enjoyment of our own wishes 

to produce one instance only of the truth of this observation what would
i have given for weeks past for the favour of a letter from my dear miss
howe in whose friendship i placed all my remaining comfort little did
i think that the next letter she would honour me with should be in such
a style as should make me look more than once at the subscription that
i might be sure the name not being written at length that it was not
signed by another a h for surely thought i this is my sister
arabella's style surely miss howe blame me as she pleases in other
points could never repeat so sharply upon her friend words written in
the bitterness of spirit and in the disorder of head nor remind her 
with asperity and with mingled strokes of wit of an argument held in
the gaiety of a heart elated with prosperous fortunes as mine then
was and very little apprehensive of the severe turn that argument would
one day take against herself 

but what have i sink in my fortunes my character forfeited my honour
lost  while i know it i care not who knows it   destitute of friends 
and even of hope what have i to do to show a spirit of repining and
expostulation to a dear friend because she is not more kind than a
sister 

you have till now my dear treated me with great indulgence if it was
with greater than i had deserved i may be to blame to have built upon
it on the consciousness that i deserve it now as much as ever but i
find by the rising bitterness which will mingle with the gall in my ink 
that i am not yet subdued enough to my condition i lay down my pen for
one moment 


 


pardon me my miss howe i have recollected myself and will endeavour
to give a particular answer to your letter although it will take me up
too much time to think of sending it by your messenger to-morrow he can
put off his journey he says till saturday i will endeavour to have
the whole narrative ready for you by saturday 

but how to defend myself in every thing that has happened i cannot tell 
since in some part of the time in which my conduct appears to have been
censurable i was not myself and to this hour know not all the methods
taken to deceive and ruin me 

you tell me that in your first letter you gave me such an account of the
vile house i was in and such cautions about that tomlinson as made you
wonder how i could think of going back 

alas my dear i was tricked most vilely tricked back as you shall
hear in its place 

without knowing the house was so very vile a house from your intended
information i disliked the people too much ever voluntarily to have
returned to it but had you really written such cautions about
tomlinson and the house as you seem to have purposed to do they must 
had they come in time have been of infinite service to me but not one
word of either whatever was your intention did you mention to me in
that first of the three letters you so warmly tell me you did send me i
will enclose it to convince you 


 the letter she encloses was mr lovelace's forged one see vol v 
letter xxx 


but your account of your messenger's delivering to me your second
letter and the description he gives of me as lying upon a couch in a
strange way bloated and flush-coloured you don't know how absolutely
puzzles and confounds me 

lord have mercy upon the poor clarissa harlowe what can this mean who
was the messenger you sent was he one of lovelace's creatures too 
could nobody come near me but that man's confederates either setting out
so or made so i know not what to make of any one syllable of this 
indeed i don't 

let me see you say this was before i went from hampstead my
intellects had not then been touched nor had i ever been surprised by
wine  strange if i had   how then could i be found in such a strange
way bloated and flush-coloured you don't know how yet what a vile 
what a hateful figure has your messenger represented me to have made 

but indeed i know nothing of any messenger from you 

believing myself secure at hampstead i staid longer there than i would
have done in hopes of the letter promised me in your short one of the
9th brought me by my own messenger in which you undertake to send for
and engage mrs townsend in my favour 


 see vol v letter xxix 


i wondered i had not heard from you and was told you were sick and at
another time that your mother and you had had words on my account and
that you had refused to admit mr hickman's visits upon it so that i
supposed at one time that you were not able to write at another that
your mother's prohibition had its due force with you but now i have no
doubt that the wicked man must have intercepted your letter and i wish
he found not means to corrupt your messenger to tell you so strange a
story 

it was on sunday june 11 you say that the man gave it me i was at
church twice that day with mrs moore mr lovelace was at her house the
while where he boarded and wanted to have lodged but i would not
permit that though i could not help the other in one of these spaces
it must be that he had time to work upon the man you'll easily my
dear find that out by inquiring the time of his arrival at mrs moore's
and other circumstances of the strange way he pretended to see me in on
a couch and the rest 

had any body seen me afterwards when i was betrayed back to the vile
house struggling under the operation of wicked potions and robbed
indeed of my intellects for this as you shall hear was my dreadful
case i might then perhaps have appeared bloated and flush-coloured 
and i know not how myself but were you to see your poor clarissa now
 or even to have seen her at hampstead before she suffered the vilest of
all outrages you would not think her bloated or flush-coloured indeed
you would not 

in a word it could not be me your messenger saw nor if any body who
it was can i divine 

i will now as briefly as the subject will permit enter into the darker
part of my sad story and yet i must be somewhat circumstantial that you
may not think me capable of reserve or palliation the latter i am not
conscious that i need i should be utterly inexcusable were i guilty of
the former to you and yet if you know how my heart sinks under the
thoughts of a recollection so painful you would pity me 

as i shall not be able perhaps to conclude what i have to write in even
two or three letters i will begin a new one with my story and send the
whole of it together although written at different periods as i am
able 

allow me a little pause my dear at this place and to subscribe myself

your ever affectionate and obliged 
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxvii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
 referred to in letter xii  
thursday night 


he had found me out at hampstead strangely found me out for i am still
at a loss to know by what means 

i was loth in my billet of the 6th to tell you so for fear of giving
you apprehensions for me and besides i hoped then to have a shorter and
happier issue to account to you for through your assistance than i met
with 


 see vol v letter xxxi 


 she then gives a narrative of all that passed at hampstead between
 herself mr lovelace capt tomlinson and the women there to the
 same effect with that so amply given by mr lovelace  

mr lovelace finding all he could say and all captain tomlinson could
urge ineffectual to prevail upon me to forgive an outrage so flagrantly
premeditated rested all his hopes on a visit which was to be paid me by
lady betty lawrance and miss montague 

in my uncertain situation my prospects all so dark i knew not to whom i
might be obliged to have recourse in the last resort and as those ladies
had the best of characters insomuch that i had reason to regret that i
had not from the first thrown myself upon their protection when i had
forfeited that of my own friends i thought i would not shun an
interview with them though i was too indifferent to their kinsman to
seek it as i doubted not that one end of their visit would be to
reconcile me to him 

on monday the 12th of june these pretended ladies came to hampstead 
and i was presented to them and they to me by their kinsman 

they were richly dressed and stuck out with jewels the pretended lady
betty's were particularly very fine 

they came in a coach-and-four hired as was confessed while their own
was repairing in town a pretence made i now perceive that i should not
guess at the imposture by the want of the real lady's arms upon it lady
betty was attended by her woman who she called morrison a modest
country-looking person 

i had heard that lady betty was a fine woman and that miss montague was
a beautiful young lady genteel and graceful and full of vivacity 
such were these impostors and having never seen either of them i had
not the least suspicion that they were not the ladies they personated 
and being put a little out of countenance by the richness of their
dresses i could not help fool that i was to apologize for my own 

the pretended lady betty then told me that her nephew had acquainted
them with the situation of affairs between us and although she could
not but say that she was very glad that she had not put such a slight
upon his lordship and them as report had given them cause to apprehend 
 the reasons for which report however she must have approved of yet
it had been matter of great concern to her and to her niece montague 
and would to the whole family to find so great a misunderstanding
subsisting between us as if not made up might distance all their
hopes 

she could easily tell who was in fault she said and gave him a look
both of anger and disdain asking him how it was possible for him to
give an offence of such a nature to so charming a lady  so she called
me   as should occasion a resentment so strong 

he pretended to be awed into shame and silence 

my dearest niece said she and took my hand i must call you niece as
well from love as to humour your uncle's laudable expedient permit me
to be not an advocate but a mediatrix for him and not for his sake so
much as for my own my charlotte's and all our family's the indignity
he has offered to you may be of too tender a nature to be inquired into 
but as he declares that it was not a premeditated offence whether my
dear  for i was going to rise upon it in my temper   it were or not and
as he declares his sorrows for it and never did creature express a
deeper sorrow for any offence than he and as it is a repairable one let
us for this one time forgive him and thereby lay an obligation upon
this man of errors let us i say my dear for sir  turning to him  
an offence against such a peerless lady as this must be an offence
against me against your cousin here and against all the virtuous of our
sex 

see my dear what a creature he had picked out could you have thought
there was a woman in the world who could thus express herself and yet be
vile but she had her principal instructions from him and those written
down too as i have reason to think for i have recollected since that i
once saw this lady betty who often rose from her seat and took a turn
to the other end of the room with such an emotion as if the joy of her
heart would not let her sit still take out a paper from her stays and
look into it and put it there again she might oftener and i not
observe it for i little thought that there could be such impostors in
the world 

i could not forbear paying great attention to what she said i found my
tears ready to start i drew out my handkerchief and was silent i had
not been so indulgently treated a great while by a person of character
and distinction  such i thought her   and durst not trust to the accent
of my voice 

the pretended miss montague joined in on this occasion and drawing her
chair close to me took my other hand and besought me to forgive her
cousin and consent to rank myself as one of the principals of a family
that had long very long coveted the honour of my alliance 

i am ashamed to repeat to you my dear now i know what wretches they
are the tender the obliging and the respectful things i said to them 

the wretch himself then came forward he threw himself at my feet how
was i beset the women grasping one my right hand the other my left 
the pretended miss montague pressing to her lips more than once the hand
she held the wicked man on his knees imploring my forgiveness and
setting before me my happy and my unhappy prospects as i should forgive
and not forgive him all that he thought would affect me in former
pleas and those of capt tomlinson he repeated he vowed he promised 
he bespoke the pretended ladies to answer for him and they engaged their
honours in his behalf 

indeed my dear i was distressed perfectly distressed i was sorry
that i had given way to this visit for i knew not how in tenderness to
relations as i thought them so worthy to treat so freely as he
deserved a man nearly allied to them so that my arguments and my
resolutions were deprived of their greatest force 

i pleaded however my application to you i expected every hour i told
them an answer from you to a letter i had written which would decide my
future destiny 

they offered to apply to you themselves in person in their own behalf 
as they politely termed it they besought me to write to you to hasten
your answer 

i said i was sure that you would write the moment that the event of an
application to be made to a third person enabled you to write but as to
the success of their request in behalf of their kinsman that depended
not upon the expected answer for that i begged their pardon was out of
the question i wished him well i wished him happy but i was
convinced that i neither could make him so nor he me 

then how the wretch promised how he vowed how he entreated and how
the women pleaded and they engaged themselves and the honour of their
whole family for his just his kind his tender behaviour to me 

in short my dear i was so hard set that i was obliged to come to a
more favourable compromise with them than i had intended i would wait
for your answer to my letter i said and if that made doubtful or
difficult the change of measures i had resolved upon and the scheme of
life i had formed i would then consider of the matter and if they
would permit me lay all before them and take their advice upon it in
conjunction with your's as if the one were my own aunt and the other
were my own cousin 

they shed tears upon this of joy they called them but since i
believe to their credit bad as they are that they were tears of
temporary remorse for the pretended miss montague turned about and as
i remember said there was no standing it 

but mr lovelace was not so easily satisfied he was fixed upon his
villanous measures perhaps and so might not be sorry to have a pretence
against me he bit his lip he had been but too much used he said to
such indifference such coldness in the very midst of his happiest
prospects i had on twenty occasions shown him to his infinite regret 
that any favour i was to confer upon him was to be the result of there
he stopt and not of my choice 

this had like to have set all back again i was exceedingly offended 
but the pretended ladies interposed the elder severely took him to
task he ought she told him to be satisfied with what i had said she
desired no other condition and what sir said she with an air of
authority would you commit errors and expect to be rewarded for them 

they then engaged me in a more agreeable conversation the pretended lady
declared that she lord m and lady sarah would directly and personally
interest themselves to bring about a general reconciliation between the
two families and this either in open or private concert with my uncle
harlowe as should be thought fit animosities on one side had been
carried a great way she said and too little care had been shown on the
other to mollify or heal my father should see that they could treat him
as a brother and a friend and my brother and sister should be convinced
that there was no room either for the jealously  sic  or envy they had
conceived from motives too unworthy to be avowed 

could i help my dear being pleased with them 

permit me here to break off the task grows too heavy at present for
the heart of

your
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxviii

miss clarissa harlowe
 in continuation  


i was very ill and obliged to lay down my pen i thought i should have
fainted but am better now so will proceed 

the pretended ladies the more we talked the fonder they seemed to be of
me and the lady betty had mrs moore called up and asked her if she
had accommodations for her niece and self her woman and two men
servants for three or four days 

mr lovelace answered for her that she had 

she would not ask her dear niece lovelace  permit me my dear whispered
she this charming style before strangers i will keep your uncle's
secret   whether she should be welcome or not to be so near her but for
the time she should stay in these parts she would come up every night 
what say you niece charlotte 

the pretended charlotte answered she should like to do so of all
things 

the lady betty called her an obliging girl she liked the place she
said her cousin leeson would excuse her the air and my company 
would do her good she never chose to lie in the smoky town if she
could help it in short my dear said she to me i will stay with you
till you hear from miss howe and till i have your consent to go with me
to glenham-hall not one moment will i be out of your company when i
can have it stedman my solicitor as the distance from town is so
small may attend me here for instructions niece charlotte one word
with you child 

they retired to the further end of the room and talked about their
night-dresses 

the miss charlotte said morrison might be dispatched for them 

true said the other but i have some letters in my private box which
i must have up and you know charlotte that i trust nobody with the
keys of that 

could not morrison bring up the box 

no she thought it safest where it was she had heard of a robbery
committed but two days ago at the food of hampstead-hill and she should
be ruined in she lost her box 

well then it was but going to town to undress and she would leave her
jewels behind her and return and should be easier a great deal on all
accounts 

for my part i wondered they came up with them but that was to be taken
as a respect paid to me and then they hinted at another visit of
ceremony which they had thought to make had they not found me so
inexpressibly engaging 

they talked loud enough for me to hear them on purpose no doubt though
in affected whispers and concluded with high praises of me 

i was not fool enough to believe or to be puffed up with their
encomiums yet not suspecting them i was not displeased at so favourable
a beginning of acquaintance with ladies whether i were to be related to
them or not of whom i had always heard honourable mention and yet at
the time i thought highly as they exalted me that in some respects
 though i hardly know in what they fell short of what i expected them to
be 

the grand deluder was at the farther end of the room another way 
probably to give me an opportunity to hear these preconcerted praises 
looking into a book which had there not been a preconcert would not
have taken his attention for one moment it was taylor's holy living and
dying 

when the pretended ladies joined me he approached me with it in his hand
 a smart book this my dear this old divine affects i see a mighty
flowery style of an ordinary country funeral where the young women in
honour of a defunct companion especially if she were a virgin or passed
for such make a flower-bed of her coffin 

and then laying down the book turning upon his heel with one of his
usual airs of gaiety and are you determined ladies to take up your
lodgings with my charming creature 

indeed they were 

never were there more cunning more artful impostors than these women 
practised creatures to be sure yet genteel and they must have been
well-educated once perhaps as much the delight of their parents as i
was of mine and who knows by what arts ruined body and mind o my dear 
how pregnant is this reflection 

but the man never was there a man so deep never so consummate a
deceiver except that detested tomlinson whose years and seriousness 
joined with a solidity of sense and judgment that seemed uncommon gave
him one would have thought advantages in villany the other had not
time for hard very hard that i should fall into the knowledge of two
such wretches when two more such i hope are not to be met with in the
world both so determined to carry on the most barbarous and perfidious
projects against a poor young creature who never did or wished harm to
either 

take the following slight account of these women's and of this man's
behaviour to each other before me 

mr lovelace carried himself to his pretended aunt with high respect 
and paid a great deference to all she said he permitted her to have all
the advantage over him in the repartees and retorts that passed between
them i could indeed easily see that it was permitted and that he
forbore that vivacity that quickness which he never spared showing to
his pretended miss montague and which a man of wit seldom knows how to
spare showing when an opportunity offers to display his wit 

the pretended miss montague was still more respectful in her behaviour to
her pretended aunt while the aunt kept up the dignity of the character
she had assumed rallying both of them with the air of a person who
depends upon the superiority which years and fortune give over younger
persons who might have a view to be obliged to her either in her life 
or at her death 

the severity of her raillery however was turned upon mr lovelace on
occasion of the character of the people who kept the lodgings which she
said i had thought myself so well warranted to leave privately 

this startled me for having then no suspicion of the vile tomlinson i
concluded and your letter of the 7th favoured my conclusion that if
the house were notorious either he or mr mennell would have given me
or him some hints of it nor although i liked not the people did i
observe any thing in them very culpable till the wednesday night before 
that they offered not to come to my assistance although within hearing
of my distress as i am sure they were and having as much reason as i
to be frighted at the fire had it been real 


 his forged letter see vol v letter xxx 


i looked with indignation upon mr lovelace at this hint 

he seemed abashed i have not patience but to recollect the specious
looks of this vile deceiver but how was it possible that even that
florid countenance of his should enable him to command a blush at his
pleasure for blush he did more than once and the blush on this
occasion was a deep-dyed crimson unstrained for and natural as i
thought but he is so much of the actor that he seems able to enter into
any character and his muscles and features appear entirely under
obedience to his wicked will 


 it is proper to observe that there was a more natural reason than this
that the lady gives for mr lovelace's blushing it was a blush of
indignation as he owned afterwards to his friend belford in
conversation for the pretended lady betty had mistaken her cue in
condemning the house and he had much ado to recover the blunder being
obliged to follow her lead and vary from his first design which was to
have the people of the house spoken well of in order to induce her to
return to it were it but on pretence to direct her clothes to be carried
to hampstead 


the pretended lady went on saying she had taken upon herself to inquire
after the people on hearing that i had left the house in disgust and
though she heard not any thing much amiss yet she heard enough to make
her wonder that he could carry his spouse a person of so much delicacy 
to a house that if it had not a bad fame had not a good one 

you must think my dear that i liked the pretended lady betty the better
for this i suppose it was designed that i should 

he was surprised he said that her ladyship should hear a bad character
of the people it was what he had never before heard that they deserved 
it was easy indeed to see that they had not very great delicacy 
though they were not indelicate the nature of their livelihood letting
lodgings and taking people to board and yet he had understood that
they were nice in these particulars led them to aim at being free and
obliging and it was difficult he said for persons of cheerful
dispositions so to behave as to avoid censure openness of heart and
countenance in the sex more was the pity too often subjected good
people whose fortunes did not set them above the world to uncharitable
censure 

he wished however that her ladyship would tell what she had heard 
although now it signified but little because he would never ask me to
set foot within their doors again and he begged she would not mince the
matter 

nay no great matter she said but she had been informed that there
were more women-lodgers in the house than men yet that their visiters
were more men than women and this had been hinted to her perhaps by
ill-wishers she could not answer for that in such a way as if somewhat
further were meant by it than was spoken 

this he said was the true innuendo-way of characterizing used by
detractors every body and every thing had a black and a white side of
which well wishers and ill wishers may make their advantage he had
observed that the front house was well let and he believed more to the
one sex than to the other for he had seen occasionally passing to or
fro several genteel modest looking women and who it was very probable 
were not so ill-beloved but they might have visiters and relations of
both sexes but they were none of them any thing to us or we to them we
were not once in any of their companies but in the genteelest and most
retired house of the two which we had in a manner to ourselves with the
use of a parlour to the street to serve us for a servants' hall or to
receive common visiters or our traders only whom we admitted not up
stairs 

he always loved to speak as he found no man in the world had suffered
more from calumny than he himself had done 

women he owned ought to be more scrupulous than men needed to be where
they lodged nevertheless he wished that fact rather than surmise were
to be the foundation of their judgments especially when they spoke of
one another 

he meant no reflection upon her ladyship's informants or rather
surmisants as he might call them be they who they would nor did he
think himself obliged to defend characters impeached or not thought well
of by women of virtue and honour neither were these people of
importance enough to have so much said about them 

the pretended lady betty said all who knew her would clear her of
censoriousness that it gave her some opinion she must needs say of the
people that he had continued there so long with me that i had rather
negative than positive reasons of dislike to them and that so shrewd a
man as she heard captain tomlinson was had not objected to them 

i think niece charlotte proceeded she as my nephew had not parted with
these lodgings you and i for as my dear miss harlowe dislikes the
people i would not ask her for her company will take a dish of tea with
my nephew there before we go out of town and then we shall see what
sort of people they are i have heard that mrs sinclair is a mighty
forbidding creature 

with all my heart madam in your ladyship's company i shall make no
scruple of going any where 

it was ladyship at every word and as she seemed proud of her title and
of her dress too i might have guessed that she was not used to either 

what say you cousin lovelace lady sarah though a melancholy woman is
very inquisitive about all your affairs i must acquaint her with every
particular circumstance when i go down 

with all his heart he would attend her whenever she pleased she would
see very handsome apartments and very civil people 

the deuce is in them said the miss montague if they appear other to us 

she then fell into family talk family happiness on my hoped-for
accession into it they mentioned lord m s and lady sarah's great
desire to see me how many friends and admirers with uplift hands i
should have  oh my dear what a triumph must these creatures and he 
have over the poor devoted all the time   what a happy man he would be 
 they would not the lady betty said give themselves the mortification
but to suppose that i should not be one of them 

presents were hinted at she resolved that i should go with her to
glenham-hall she would not be refused although she were to stay a week
beyond her time for me 

she longed for the expected letter from you i must write to hasten it 
and to let miss howe know how every thing stood since i wrote last that
might dispose me absolutely in her favour and in her nephew's and then
she hoped there would be no occasion for me to think of entering upon any
new measures 

indeed my dear i did at the time intend if i heard not from you by
morning to dispatch a man and horse to you with the particulars of all 
that you might if you thought proper at least put off mrs townsend's
coming up to another day but i was miserably prevented 

she made me promise that i would write to you upon this subject whether
i heard from you or not one of her servants should ride post with my
letter and wait for miss howe's answer 

she then launched out in deserved praises of you my dear how fond she
should be of the honour of your acquaintance 

the pretended miss montague joined in with her as well for herself as
for her sister 

abominably well instructed were they both 

o my dear what risks may poor giddy girls run when they throw
themselves out of the protection of their natural friends and into the
wide world 

the then talked again of reconciliation and intimacy with every one of my
friends with my mother particularly and gave the dear good lady the
praises that every one gives her who has the happiness to know her 

ah my dear miss howe i had almost forgot my resentments against the
pretended nephew so many agreeable things said made me think that if
you should advise it and if i could bring my mind to forgive the wretch
for an outrage so premeditatedly vile and could forbear despising him
for that and his other ungrateful and wicked ways i might not be unhappy
in an alliance with such a family yet thought i at the time with what
intermixture does every thing come to me that had the appearance of good 
 however as my lucid hopes made me see fewer faults in the behaviour
of these pretended ladies than recollection and abhorrence have helped
me since to see i began to reproach myself that i had not at first
thrown myself into their protection 

but amidst all these delightful prospects i must not said the lady
betty forget that i am to go to town 

she then ordered her coach to be got to the door we will all go to town
together said she and return together morrison shall stay here and
see every thing as i am used to have it in relation to my apartment and
my bed for i am very particular in some respects my cousin leeson's
servants can do all i want to be done with regard to my night-dresses 
and the like and it will be a little airing for you my dear and a
want of your apparel to be sent from your former lodgings to mrs 
leeson's and we can bring it up with us from thence 

i had no intention to comply but as i did not imagine that she would
insist upon my going to town with them i made no answer to that part of
her speech 

i must here lay down my tired pen 

recollection heart-affecting recollection how it pains me 



letter lxix

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


in the midst of this agreeableness the coach came to the door the
pretended lady betty besought me to give them my company to their cousin
leeson's i desired to be excused yet suspected nothing she would not
be denied how happy would a visit so condescending make her cousin
leeson her cousin leeson was not unworthy of my acquaintance and
would take it for the greatest favour in the world 

i objected my dress but the objection was not admitted she bespoke a
supper of mrs moore to be ready at nine 

mr lovelace vile hypocrite and wicked deceiver seeing as he said my
dislike to go desired his ladyship not to insist upon it 

fondness for my company was pleaded she begged me to oblige her made a
motion to help me to my fan herself and in short was so very urgent 
that my feet complied against my speech and my mind and being in a
manner led to the coach by her and made to step in first she followed
me and her pretended niece and the wretch followed her and away it
drove 

nothing but the height of affectionate complaisance passed all the way 
over and over what a joy would this unexpected visit give her cousin
leeson what a pleasure must it be to such a mind as mine to be able
to give so much joy to every body i came near 

the cruel the savage seducer as i have since recollected was in a
rapture all the way but yet such a sort of rapture as he took visible
pains to check 

hateful villain how i abhor him what mischief must be then in his
plotting heart what a devoted victim must i be in all their eyes 

though not pleased i was nevertheless just then thoughtless of danger 
they endeavouring thus to lift me up above all apprehensions of that and
above myself too 

but think my dear what a dreadful turn all had upon me when through
several streets and ways i knew nothing of the coach slackening its
pace came within sight of the dreadful house of the dreadfullest woman
in the world as she proved to me 

lord be good unto me cried the poor fool looking out of the coach mr 
lovelace madam turning to the pretended lady betty madam turning to
the niece my hands and eyes lifted up lord be good unto me 

what what what my dear 

he pulled the string what need to have come this way said he but since
we are i will but ask a question my dearest life why this
apprehension 

the coachman stopped his servant who with one of her's was behind 
alighted ask said he if i have any letters who knows my dearest
creature turning to me but we may already have one from the captain 
we will not go out of the coach fear nothing why so apprehensive oh 
these fine spirits cried the execrable insulter 

dreadfully did my heart then misgive me i was ready to faint why this
terror my life you shall not stir out of the coach but one question 
now the fellow has drove us this way 

your lady will faint cried the execrable lady betty turning to him my
dearest niece niece i will call you taking my hand we must alight 
if you are so ill let us alight only for a glass of water and
hartshorn indeed we must alight 

no no no i am well quite well won't the man drive on i am well 
quite well indeed i am man drive on putting my head out of the coach
 man drive on though my voice was too low to be heard 

the coach stopt at the door how i trembled 

dorcas came to the door on its stopping 

my dearest creature said the vile man gasping as it were for breath 
you shall not alight any letters for me dorcas 

there are two sir and here is a gentleman mr belton sir waits for
your honour and has done so above an hour 

i'll just speak to him open the door you sha'n't step out my dear a
letter perhaps from captain already you sha'n't step out my dear 

i sighed as if my heart would burst 

but we must step out nephew your lady will faint maid a glass of
hartshorn and water my dear you must step out you will faint child 
we must cut your laces  i believe my complexion was all manner of
colours by turns  indeed you must step out my dear 

he knew said i i should be well the moment the coach drove from the
door i should not alight by his soul i should not 

lord lord nephew lord lord cousin both women in a breath what ado
you make about nothing you persuade your lady to be afraid of
alighting see you not that she is just fainting 

indeed madam said the vile seducer my dearest love must not be moved
in this point against her will i beg it may not be insisted upon 

fiddle-faddle foolish man what a pother is here i guess how it is 
you are ashamed to let us see what sort of people you carried your lady
among but do you go out and speak to your friend and take your
letters 

he stept out but shut the coach-door after him to oblige me 

the coach may go on madam said i 

the coach shall go on my dear life said he but he gave not nor
intended to give orders that it should 

let the coach go on said i mr lovelace may come after us 

indeed my dear you are ill indeed you must alight alight but for one
quarter of an hour alight but to give orders yourself about your
things whom can you be afraid of in my company and my niece's these
people must have behaved shockingly to you please the lord i'll
inquire into it i'll see what sort of people they are 

immediately came the old creature to the door a thousand pardons dear
madam stepping to the coach-side if we have any way offended you be
pleased ladies  to the other two  to alight 

well my dear whispered the lady betty i now find that an hideous
description of a person we never saw is an advantage to them i thought
the woman was a monster but really she seems tolerable 

i was afraid i should have fallen into fits but still refused to go out
 man man man cried i gaspingly my head out of the coach and in 
by turns half a dozen times running drive on let us go 

my heart misgave me beyond the power of my own accounting for it for
still i did not suspect these women but the antipathy i had taken to
the vile house and to find myself so near it when i expected no such
matter with the sight of the old creature all together made me behave
like a distracted person 

the hartshorn and water was brought the pretended lady betty made me
drink it heaven knows if there was any thing else in it 

besides said she whisperingly i must see what sort of creatures the
nieces are want of delicacy cannot be hid from me you could not
surely my dear have this aversion to re-enter a house for a few
minutes in our company in which you lodged and boarded several weeks 
unless these women could be so presumptuously vile as my nephew ought
not to know 

out stept the pretended lady the servant at her command having opened
the door 

dearest madam said the other to me let me follow you  for i was next
the door   fear nothing i will not stir from your presence 

come my dear said the pretended lady give me your hand holding out
her's oblige me this once 

i will bless your footsteps said the old creature if once more you
honour my house with your presence 

a crowd by this time was gathered about us but i was too much affected
to mind that 

again the pretended miss montague urged me standing up as ready to go
out if i would give her room lord my dear said she who can bear this
crowd what will people think 

the pretended lady again pressed me with both her hands held out only 
my dear to give orders about your things 

and thus pressed and gazed at for then i looked about me the women
so richly dressed people whispering in an evil moment out stepped i 
trembling forced to lean with both my hands frighted too much for
ceremony on the pretended lady betty's arm oh that i had dropped down
dead upon the guilty threshold 

we shall stay but a few minutes my dear but a few minutes said the
same specious jilt out of breath with her joy as i have since thought 
that they had thus triumphed over the unhappy victim 

come mrs sinclair i think your name is show us the way following
her and leading me i am very thirsty you have frighted me my dear 
with your strange fears i must have tea made if it can be done in a
moment we have farther to go mrs sinclair and must return to
hampstead this night 

it shall be ready in a moment cried the wretch we have water boiling 

hasten then come my dear to me as she led me through the passage to
the fatal inner house lean upon me how you tremble how you falter in
your steps dearest niece lovelace  the old wretch being in hearing  
why these hurries upon your spirits we'll be gone in a minute 

and thus she led the poor sacrifice into the old wretch's too-well-known
parlour 

never was any body so gentle so meek so low voiced as the odious
woman drawling out in a puling accent all the obliging things she
could say awed i then thought by the conscious dignity of a woman of
quality glittering with jewels 

the called-for tea was ready presently 

there was no mr belton i believe for the wretch went not to any body 
unless it were while we were parlying in the coach no such person
however appeared at the tea-table 

i was made to drink two dishes with milk complaisantly urged by the
pretended ladies helping me each to one i was stupid to their hands 
and when i took the tea almost choked with vapours and could hardly
swallow 

i thought transiently thought that the tea the last dish particularly 
had an odd taste they on my palating it observed that the milk was
london-milk far short in goodness of what they were accustomed to from
their own dairies 

i have no doubt that my two dishes and perhaps my hartshorn were
prepared for me in which case it was more proper for their purpose that
they should help me than that i should help myself ill before i found
myself still more and more disordered in my head a heavy torpid pain
increasing fast upon me but i imputed it to my terror 

nevertheless at the pretended lady's motion i went up stairs attended
by dorcas who affected to weep for joy that she once more saw my
blessed face that was the vile creature's word and immediately i set
about taking out some of my clothes ordering what should be put up and
what sent after me 

while i was thus employed up came the pretended lady betty in a
hurrying way my dear you won't be long before you are ready my
nephew is very busy in writing answers to his letters so i'll just whip
away and change my dress and call upon you in an instant 

o madam i am ready i am now ready you must not leave me here and
down i sunk affrighted into a chair 

this instant this instant i will return before you can be ready 
before you can have packed up your things we would not be late the
robbers we have heard of may be out don't let us be late 

and away she hurried before i could say another word her pretended
niece went with her without taking notice to me of her going 

i had no suspicion yet that these women were not indeed the ladies
they personated and i blamed myself for my weak fears it cannot be 
thought i that such ladies will abet treachery against a poor creature
they are so fond of they must undoubtedly be the persons they appear to
be what folly to doubt it the air the dress the dignity of women of
quality how unworthy of them and of my charity concluded i is this
ungenerous shadow of suspicion 

so recovering my stupefied spirits as well as they could be recovered 
 for i was heavier and heavier and wondered to dorcas what ailed me 
rubbing my eyes and taking some of her snuff pinch after pinch to very
little purpose i pursued my employment but when that was over all
packed up that i designed to be packed up and i had nothing to do but to
think and found them tarry so long i thought i should have gone
distracted i shut myself into the chamber that had been mine i
kneeled i prayed yet knew not what i prayed for then ran out again it
was almost dark night i said where where where was mr lovelace 

he came to me taking no notice at first of my consternation and
wildness  what they had given me made me incoherent and wild   all goes
well said he my dear a line from capt tomlinson 

all indeed did go well for the villanous project of the most cruel and
most villanous of men 

i demanded his aunt i demanded his cousin the evening i said was
closing my head was very very bad i remember i said and it grew
worse and worse 

terror however as yet kept up my spirits and i insisted upon his going
himself to hasten them 

he called his servant he raved at the sex for their delay twas well
that business of consequence seldom depended upon such parading 
unpunctual triflers 

his servant came 

he ordered him to fly to his cousin leeson's and to let lady betty and
his cousin know how uneasy we both were at their delay adding of his
own accord desire them if they don't come instantly to send their
coach and we will go without them tell them i wonder they'll serve me
so 

i thought this was considerately and fairly put but now indifferent as
my head was i had a little time to consider the man and his behaviour 
he terrified me with his looks and with his violent emotions as he
gazed upon me evident joy-suppressed emotions as i have since
recollected his sentences short and pronounced as if his breath were
touched never saw i his abominable eyes look as then they looked 
triumph in them fierce and wild and more disagreeable than the women's
at the vile house appeared to me when i first saw them and at times 
such a leering mischief-boding cast i would have given the world to
have been an hundred miles from him yet his behaviour was decent a
decency however that i might have seen to be struggled for for he
snatched my hand two or three times with a vehemence in his grasp that
hurt me speaking words of tenderness through his shut teeth as it
seemed and let it go with a beggar-voiced humbled accent like the vile
woman's just before half-inward yet his words and manner carrying the
appearance of strong and almost convulsed passion o my dear what
mischief was he not then meditating 

i complained once or twice of thirst my mouth seemed parched at the
time i supposed that it was my terror gasping often as i did for
breath that parched up the roof of my mouth i called for water some
table-beer was brought me beer i suppose was a better vehicle for
their potions i told the maid that she knew i seldom tasted malt
liquor yet suspecting nothing of this nature being extremely thirsty 
i drank it as what came next and instantly as it were found myself
much worse than before as if inebriated i should fancy i know not how 

his servant was gone twice as long as he needed and just before his
return came one of the pretended lady betty's with a letter for mr 
lovelace 

he sent it up to me i read it and then it was that i thought myself a
lost creature it being to put off her going to hampstead that night on
account of violent fits which miss montague was pretended to be seized
with for then immediately came into my head his vile attempt upon me in
this house the revenge that my flight might too probably inspire him
with on that occasion and because of the difficulty i made to forgive
him and to be reconciled to him his very looks wild and dreadful to me 
and the women of the house such as i had more reason than ever even from
the pretended lady betty's hint to be afraid of all these crowding
together in my apprehensive mind i fell into a kind of phrensy 

i have no remembrance how i was for this time it lasted but i know that 
in my first agitations i pulled off my head-dress and tore my ruffles
in twenty tatters and ran to find him out 

when a little recovered i insisted upon the hint he had given me of
their coach but the messenger he said had told him that it was sent
to fetch a physician lest his chariot should be put up or not ready 

i then insisted upon going directly to lady betty's lodgings 

mrs leeson's was now a crowded house he said and as my earnestness
could be owing to nothing but groundless apprehensions  and oh what
vows what protestations of his honour did he then make   he hoped i
would not add to their present concern charlotte indeed was used to
fits he said upon any great surprises whether of joy or grief and
they would hold her for one week together if not got off in a few hours 

you are an observer of eyes my dear said the villain perhaps in secret
insult saw you not in miss montague's now-and-then at hampstead 
something wildish i was afraid for her then silence and quiet only do
her good your concern for her and her love for you will but augment
the poor girl's disorder if you should go 

all impatient with grief and apprehension i still declared myself
resolved not to stay in that house till morning all i had in the world 
my rings my watch my little money for a coach or if one were not to
be got i would go on foot to hampstead that night though i walked it by
myself 

a coach was hereupon sent for or pretended to be sent for any price 
he said he would give to oblige me late as it was and he would attend
me with all his soul but no coach was to be got 

let me cut short the rest i grew worse and worse in my head now
stupid now raving now senseless the vilest of vile women was brought
to frighten me never was there so horrible a creature as she
appreared to me at this time 

i remember i pleaded for mercy i remember that i said i would be his 
indeed i would be his to obtain his mercy but no mercy found i my
strength my intellects failed me and then such scenes followed o my
dear such dreadful scenes fits upon fits faintly indeed and
imperfectly remembered procuring me no compassion but death was
withheld from me that would have been too great a mercy 


 


thus was i tricked and deluded back by blacker hearts of my own sex than
i thought there were in the world who appeared to me to be persons of
honour and when in his power thus barbarously was i treated by this
villanous man 

i was so senseless that i dare not aver that the horrid creatures of
the house were personally aiding and abetting but some visionary
remembrances i have of female figures flitting as i may say before my
sight the wretched woman's particularly but as these confused ideas
might be owing to the terror i had conceived of the worse than masculine
violence she had been permitted to assume to me for expressing my
abhorrence of her house and as what i suffered from his barbarity wants
not that aggravation i will say no more on a subject so shocking as this
must ever be to my remembrance 

i never saw the personating wretches afterwards he persisted to the
last dreadfully invoking heaven as a witness to the truth of his
assertion that they were really and truly the ladies they pretended to
be declaring that they could not take leave of me when they left town 
because of the state of senselessness and phrensy i was in for their
intoxicating or rather stupefying potions had almost deleterious
effects upon my intellects as i have hinted insomuch that for several
days together i was under a strange delirium now moping now dozing 
now weeping now raving now scribbling tearing what i scribbled as fast
as i wrote it most miserable when now-and-then a ray of reason brought
confusedly to my remembrance what i had suffered 



letter lxx

miss clarissa harlowe
 in continuation  


 the lady next gives an account 

of her recovery from her delirium and sleepy disorder 

of her attempt to get away in his absence 

of the conversations that followed at his return between them 

of the guilty figure he made 

of her resolution not to have him 

of her several efforts to escape 

of her treaty with dorcas to assist her in it 

of dorcas's dropping the promissory note undoubtedly as she says on
 purpose to betray her 

of her triumph over all the creatures of the house assembled to terrify
 her and perhaps to commit fresh outrages upon her 

of his setting out for m hall 

of his repeated letters to induce her to meet him at the altar on her
 uncle's anniversary 

of her determined silence to them all 

of her second escape effected as she says contrary to her own
 expectation the attempt being at first but the intended prelude to
 a more promising one which she had formed in her mind 

and of other particulars which being to be found in mr lovelace's
 letters preceding and the letter of his friend belford are
 omitted she then proceeds  


the very hour that i found myself in a place of safety i took pen to
write to you when i began i designed only to write six or eight lines 
to inquire after your health for having heard nothing from you i
feared indeed that you had been and still were too ill to write but
no sooner did my pen begin to blot the paper but my sad heart hurried it
into length the apprehensions i had lain under that i should not be
able to get away the fatigue i had in effecting my escape the
difficulty of procuring a lodging for myself having disliked the people
of two houses and those of a third disliking me for you must think i
made a frighted appearance these together with the recollection of what
i had suffered from him and my farther apprehensions of my insecurity 
and my desolate circumstances had so disordered me that i remember i
rambled strangely in that letter 

in short i thought it on re-perusal a half-distracted one but i then
despaired were i to begin again of writing better so i let it go 
and can have no excuse for directing it as i did if the cause of the
incoherence in it will not furnish me with a very pitiable one 

the letter i received from your mother was a dreadful blow to me but
nevertheless it had the good effect upon me labouring as i did just
then under a violent fit of vapourish despondency and almost yielding
to it which profuse bleeding and blisterings have in paralytic or
apoplectical strokes reviving my attention and restoring me to spirits
to combat the evils i was surrounded by sluicing off and diverting into
a new channel if i may be allowed another metaphor the overcharging
woes which threatened once more to overwhelm my intellects 

but yet i most sincerely lamented and still lament in your mother's
words that i cannot be unhappy by myself and was grieved not only for
the trouble i had given you before but for the new one i had brought
upon you by my inattention 


 she then gives the substance of the letters she wrote to mrs norton to
 lady betty lawrance and to mrs hodges as also of their answers 
 whereby she detected all mr lovelace's impostures she proceeds
 as follows  


i cannot however forbear to wonder how the vile tomlinson could come at
the knowledge of several of the things he told me of and which
contributed to give me confidence in him 


 the attentive reader need not be referred back for what the lady
nevertheless could not account for as she knew not that mr lovelace had
come at miss howe's letters particularly that in vol iv letter xxix 
which he comments upon in letter xliv of the same volume 


i doubt not that the stories of mrs fretchville and her house would be
found as vile as any of the rest were i to inquire and had i not
enough and too much already against the perjured man 

how have i been led on what will be the end of such a false and
perjured creature heaven not less profaned and defied by him than
myself deceived and abused this however against myself i must say 
that if what i have suffered be the natural consequence of my first
error i never can forgive myself although you are so partial in my
favour as to say that i was not censurable for what passed before my
first escape 

and now honoured madam and my dearest miss howe who are to sit in
judgment upon my case permit me to lay down my pen with one request 
which with the greatest earnestness i make to you both and that is 
that you will neither of you open your lips in relation to the potions
and the violences i have hinted at not that i am solicitous that my
disgrace should be hidden from the world or that it should not be
generally known that the man has proved a villain to me for this it
seems every body but myself expected from his character but suppose 
as his actions by me are really of a capital nature it were insisted
upon that i should appear to prosecute him and his accomplices in a court
of justice how do you think i could bear that 

but since my character before the capital enormity was lost in the eye
of the world and that from the very hour i left my father's house and
since all my own hopes of worldly happiness are entirely over let me
slide quietly into my grave and let it be not remembered except by one
friendly tear and no more dropt from your gentle eye mine own dear
anna howe on the happy day that shall shut up all my sorrows that there
was such a creature as

clarissa harlowe

saturday july 8 



letter lxxi

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
sunday july 9 


may heaven signalize its vengeance in the face of all the world upon
the most abandoned and profligate of men and in its own time i doubt
not but it will and we must look to a world beyond this for the reward
of your sufferings 

another shocking detection my dear how have you been deluded very
watchful i have thought you very sagacious but alas not watchful 
not sagacious enough for the horrid villain you have had to deal with 
 

the letter you sent me enclosed as mine of the 7th of june is a
villanous forgery 


 see vol v letter xxx 


the hand indeed is astonishingly like mine and the cover i see is
actually my cover but yet the letter is not so exactly imitated but
that had you had any suspicions about his vileness at the time you 
who so well know my hand might have detected it 

in short this vile forged letter though a long one contains but a
few extracts from mine mine was a very long one he has omitted every
thing i see in it that could have shown you what a detestable house the
house is and given you suspicions of the vile tomlinson you will see
this and how he has turned miss lardner's information and my advices to
you  execrable villain   to his own horrid ends by the rough draught of
the genuine letter which i shall enclose 


 see vol v letter xx 


apprehensive for both our safeties from the villany of such a daring and
profligate contriver i must call upon you my dear to resolve upon
taking legal vengeance of the infernal wretch and this not only for our
own sakes but for the sakes of innocents who otherwise may yet be
deluded and outraged by him 


 she then gives the particulars of the report made by the young fellow
 whom she sent to hampstead with her letter and who supposed he had
 delivered it into her own hand and then proceeds  


 see vol vi letter vi 


i am astonished that the vile wretch who could know nothing of the time
my messenger whose honesty i can vouch for would come could have a
creature ready to personate you strange that the man should happen to
arrive just as you were gone to church as i find was the fact on
comparing what he says with your hint that you were at church twice that
day when he might have got to mrs moore's two hours before but had
you told me my dear that the villain had found you out and was about
you you should have done that yet i blame you upon a judgment founded
on the event only 

i never had any faith in the stories that go current among country girls 
of specters familiars and demons yet i see not any other way to
account for this wretch's successful villany and for his means of
working up his specious delusions but by supposing if he be not the
devil himself that he has a familiar constantly at his elbow 
sometimes it seems to me that this familiar assumes the shape of that
solemn villain tomlinson sometimes that of the execrable sinclair as he
calls her sometimes it is permitted to take that of lady betty lawrance
 but when it would assume the angelic shape and mien of my beloved
friend see what a bloated figure it made 

tis my opinion my dear that you will be no longer safe where you are 
than while the v is in the country words are poor or how could i
execrate him i have hardly any doubt that he has sold himself for a
time oh may the time be short or may his infernal prompter no more
keep covenant with him than he does with others 

i enclose not only the rough draught of my long letter mentioned above 
but the heads of that which the young fellow thought he delivered into
your own hands at hampstead and when you have perused them i will
leave to you to judge how much reason i had to be surprised that you
wrote me not an answer to either of those letters one of which you owned
you had received though it proved to be his forged one the other
delivered into your own hands as i was assured and both of them of so
much concern to your honour and still now much more surprised i must be 
when i received a letter from mrs townsend dated june 15 from
hampstead importing that mr lovelace who had been with you several
days had on the monday before brought lady betty and his cousin 
richly dressed and in a coach-and-four to visit you who with your own
consent had carried you to town with them to your former lodgings 
where you still were that the hampstead women believed you to be
married and reflected upon me as a fomenter of differences between man
and wife that he himself was at hampstead the day before viz wednesday
the 14th and boasted of his happiness with you inviting mrs moore 
mrs bevis and miss rawlins to go to town to visit his spouse which
they promised to do that he declared that you were entirely reconciled
to your former lodgings and that finally the women at hampstead told
mrs townsend that he had very handsomely discharged theirs 

i own to you my dear that i was so much surprised and disgusted at
these appearances against a conduct till then unexceptionable that i was
resolved to make myself as easy as i could and wait till you should
think fit to write to me but i could rein-in my impatience but for a
few days and on the 20th of june i wrote a sharp letter to you which i
find you did not receive 

what a fatality my dear has appeared in your case from the very
beginning till this hour had my mother permitted 

but can i blame her when you have a father and mother living who have
so much to answer for so much as no father and mother considering
the child they have driven persecuted exposed renounced ever had to
answer for 

but again i must execrate the abandoned villain yet as i said before 
all words are poor and beneath the occasion 

but see we not in the horrid perjuries and treachery of this man what
rakes and libertines will do when they get a young creature into their
power it is probable that he might have the intolerable presumption to
hope an easier conquest but when your unexampled vigilance and exalted
virtue made potions and rapes and the utmost violences necessary to
the attainment of his detestable end we see that he never boggled at
them i have no doubt that the same or equal wickedness would be oftener
committed by men of his villanous cast if the folly and credulity of the
poor inconsiderates who throw themselves into their hands did not give
them an easier triumph 

with what comfort must those parents reflect upon these things who have
happily disposed of their daughters in marriage to a virtuous man and
how happy the young women who find themselves safe in a worthy
protection if such a person as miss clarissa harlowe could not escape 
who can be secure since though every rake is not a lovelace neither
is every woman a clarissa and his attempts were but proportioned to your
resistance and vigilance 

my mother has commanded me to let you know her thoughts upon the whole of
your sad story i will do it in another letter and send it to you with
this by a special messenger 

but for the future if you approve of it i will send my letters by the
usual hand collins's to be left at the saracen's head on snow-hill 
whither you may send your's as we both used to do to wilson's except
such as we shall think fit to transmit by the post which i am afraid 
after my next must be directed to mr hickman as before since my
mother is fixing a condition to our correspondence which i doubt you
will not comply with though i wish you would this condition i shall
acquaint you with by-and-by 

mean time begging excuse for all the harsh things in my last of which
your sweet meekness and superior greatness of soul have now made me most
heartily ashamed i beseech you my dearest creature to believe me to be

your truly sympathising 
and unalterable friend 
anna howe 



letter lxxii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
monday july 10 


i now my dearest friend resume my pen to obey my mother in giving you
her opinion upon your unhappy story 

she still harps upon the old string and will have it that all your
calamities are owing to your first fatal step for she believes what i
cannot that your relations had intended after one general trial more 
to comply with your aversion if they had found it to be as riveted a
one as let me say it was a folly to suppose it would not be found to
be after so many ridiculously-repeated experiments 

as to your latter sufferings from that vilest of miscreants she is
unalterably of opinion that if all be as you have related which she
doubts not with regard to the potions and to the violences you have
sustained you ought by all means to set on foot a prosecution against
him and against his devilish accomplices 

she asks what murderers what ravishers would be brought to justice if
modesty were to be a general plea and allowable against appearing in a
court to prosecute 

she says that the good of society requires that such a beast of prey
should be hunted out of it and if you do not prosecute him she thinks
you will be answerable for all the mischiefs he may do in the course of
his future villanous life 

will it be thought nancy said she that miss clarissa harlowe can be in
earnest when she says she is not solicitous to have her disgraces
concealed from the world if she be afraid or ashamed to appear in court 
to do justice to herself and her sex against him will it not be rather
surmised that she may be apprehensive that some weakness or lurking
love will appear upon the trial of the strange cause if inferred she 
such complicated villany as this where perjury potions forgery 
subornation are all combined to effect the ruin of an innocent creature 
and to dishonour a family of eminence and where the very crimes as may
be supposed are proofs of her innocence is to go off with impunity 
what case will deserve to be brought into judgment or what malefactor
ought to be hanged 

then she thinks and so do i that the vile creatures his accomplices 
ought by all means to be brought to condign punishment as they must
and will be upon bringing him to trial and this may be a mean to blow up
and root out a whole nest of vipers and save many innocent creatures 

she added that if miss clarissa harlowe could be so indifferent about
having this public justice done upon such a wretch for her own sake she
ought to overcome her scruples out of regard to her family her
acquaintance and her sex which are all highly injured and scandalized
by his villany to her 

for her own part she declares that were she your mother she would
forgive you upon no other terms and upon your compliance with these 
she herself will undertake to reconcile all your family to you 

these my dear are my mother's sentiments upon your sad story 

i cannot say but there are reason and justice in them and it is my
opinion that it would be very right for the law to oblige an injured
woman to prosecute and to make seduction on the man's part capital 
where his studied baseness and no fault in her will appeared 

to this purpose the custom in the isle of man is a very good one 

if a single woman there prosecutes a single man for a rape the
ecclesiastical judges impannel a jury and if this jury find him guilty 
he is returned guilty to the temporal courts where if he be convicted 
the deemster or judge delivers to the woman a rope a sword and a
ring and she has it in her choice to have him hanged beheaded or to
marry him 

one of the two former i think should always be her option 

i long for the particulars of your story you must have too much time
upon your hands for a mind so active as your's if tolerable health and
spirits be afforded you 

the villany of the worst of men and the virtue of the most excellent of
women i expect will be exemplified in it were it to be written in the
same connected and particular manner in which you used to write to me 

try for it my dearest friend and since you cannot give the example
without the warning give both for the sakes of all those who shall hear
of your unhappy fate beginning from your's of june 5 your prospects
then not disagreeable i pity you for the task though i cannot
willingly exempt you from it 


 


my mother will have me add that she must insist upon your prosecuting
the villain she repeats that she makes that a condition on which she
permits our future correspondence let me therefore know your thoughts
upon it i asked her if she would be willing that i should appear to
support you in court if you complied by all means she said if that
would induce you to begin with him and with the horrid women i think i
could probably attend you i am sure i could were there but a
probability of bringing the monster to his deserved end 

once more your thoughts of it supposing it were to meet with the
approbation of your relations 

but whatever be your determination on this head it shall be my constant
prayer that god will give you patience to bear your heavy afflictions 
as a person ought to do who has not brought them upon herself by a faulty
will that he will speak peace and comfort to your wounded mind and give
you many happy years i am and ever will be 

your affectionate and faithful
anna howe 


 


 the two preceding letters were sent by a special messenger in the cover
 were written the following lines  

monday july 10 

i cannot my dearest friend suffer the enclosed to go unaccompanied by a
few lines to signify to you that they are both less tender in some
places than i would have written had they not been to pass my mother's
inspection the principal reason however of my writing thus separately
is to beg of you to permit me to send you money and necessaries which
you must needs want and that you will let me know if either i or any
body i can influence can be of service to you i am excessively
apprehensive that you are not enough out of the villain's reach where you
are yet london i am persuaded is the place of all others to be
private in 

i could tear my hair for vexation that i have it not in my power to
afford you personal protection i am

your ever devoted
anna howe 


once more forgive me my dearest creature for my barbarous taunting in
mine of the 5th yet i can hardly forgive myself i to be so cruel yet
to know you so well whence whence had i this vile impatiency of
spirit 



letter lxxiii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
tuesday july 11 


forgive you my dear most cordially do i forgive you will you forgive
me for some sharp things i wrote in return to your's of the 5th you
could not have loved me as you do nor had the concern you have always
shown for my honour if you had not been utterly displeased with me on
the appearance which my conduct wore to you when you wrote that letter 
i most heartily thank you my best and only love for the opportunity you
gave me of clearing it up and for being generously ready to acquit me of
intentional blame the moment you had read my melancholy narrative 

as you are so earnest to have all the particulars of my sad story before
you i will if life and spirits be lent me give you an ample account of
all that has befallen me from the time you mention but this it is
very probable you will not see till after the close of my last scene 
and as i shall write with a view to that i hope no other voucher will be
wanted for the veracity of the writer be who will the reader 

i am far from thinking myself out of the reach of this man's further
violence but what can i do whither can i fly perhaps my bad state
of health which must grow worse as recollection of the past evils and
reflections upon them grow heavier and heavier upon me may be my
protection once indeed i thought of going abroad and had i the
prospect of many years before me i would go but my dear the blow is
given nor have you reason now circumstanced as i am to be concerned
that it is what a heart must i have if it be not broken and indeed 
my dear friend i do so earnestly wish for the last closing scene and
with so much comfort find myself in a declining way that i even
sometimes ungratefully regret that naturally-healthy constitution which
used to double upon me all my enjoyments 

as to the earnestly-recommended prosecution i may possibly touch upon it
more largely hereafter if ever i shall have better spirits for they are
at present extremely sunk and low but just now i will only say that i
would sooner suffer every evil the repetition of the capital one
excepted than appear publicly in a court to do myself justice and i
am heartily grieved that your mother prescribes such a measure as the
condition of our future correspondence for the continuance of your
friendship my dear and the desire i had to correspond with you to my
life's end were all my remaining hopes and consolation nevertheless 
as that friendship is in the power of the heart not of the hand only i
hope i shall not forfeit that 


 dr lewen in letter xxiv of vol viii presses her to this public
prosecution by arguments worthy of his character which she answers in a
manner worthy of her's see letter xxv of that volume 


o my dear what would i give to obtain a revocation of my father's
malediction a reconciliation is not to be hoped for you who never
loved my father may think my solicitude on this head a weakness but the
motive for it sunk as my spirits at times are is not always weak 


 


i approve of the method you prescribe for the conveyance of our letters 
and have already caused the porter of the inn to be engaged to bring to
me your's the moment that collins arrives with them and the servant of
the house where i am will be permitted to carry mine to collins for you 

i have written a letter to miss rawlins of hampstead the answer to
which just now received has helped me to the knowledge of the vile
contrivance by which the wicked man got your letter of june the 10th i
will give you the contents of both 

in mine to her i briefly acquainted her with what had befallen me 
through the vileness of the women who had passed upon me as the aunt and
cousin of the wickedest of men and own that i never was married to him 
i desire her to make particular inquiry and to let me know who it was
at mrs moore's that on sunday afternoon june 11 while i was at
church received a letter from miss howe pretending to be me and lying
on a couch which letter had it come to my hands would have saved me
from ruin i excuse myself on the score of the delirium which the
horrid usage i had received threw me into and from a confinement as
barbarous as illegal that i had not before applied to mrs moore for an
account of what i was indebted to her which account i now desired and 
for fear of being traced by mr lovelace i directed her to superscribe
her answer to mrs mary atkins to be left till called for at the belle
savage inn on ludgate-hill 

in her answer she tells me that the vile wretch prevailed upon mrs 
bevis to personate me  a sudden motion of his it seems on the
appearance of your messenger   and persuaded her to lie along a couch 
a handkerchief over her neck and face pretending to be ill the
credulous woman drawn in by false notions of your ill offices to keep up
a variance between a man and his wife and so taking the letter from your
messenger as me 

miss rawlins takes pains to excuse mrs bevis's intention she
expresses their astonishment and concern at what i communicate but is
glad however and so they are all that they know in time the vileness
of the base man the two widows and herself having at his earnest
invitation designed me a visit at mrs sinclair's supposing all to be
happy between him and me as he assured them was the case mr lovelace 
she informs me had handsomely satisfied mrs moore and miss rawlins
concludes with wishing to be favoured with the particulars of so
extraordinary a story as these particulars may be of use to let her see
what wicked creatures women as well as men there are in the world 

i thank you my dear for the draughts of your two letters which were
intercepted by this horrid man i see the great advantage they were of
to him in the prosecution of his villanous designs against the poor
wretch whom he had so long made the sport of his abhorred inventions 

let me repeat that i am quite sick of life and of an earth in which
innocent and benevolent spirits are sure to be considered as aliens and
to be made sufferers by the genuine sons and daughters of that earth 

how unhappy that those letters only which could have acquainted me with
his horrid views and armed me against them and against the vileness of
the base women should fall into his hands unhappier still in that my
very escape to hampstead gave him the opportunity of receiving them 

nevertheless i cannot but still wonder how it was possible for that
tomlinson to know what passed between mr hickman and my uncle harlowe 
a circumstance which gave the vile impostor most of his credit with me 


 see the note in letter lxx of this volume 


how the wicked wretch himself could find me out at hampstead must also
remain wholly a mystery to me he may glory in his contrivances he who
has more wickedness than wit may glory in his contrivances but after
all i shall i humbly presume to hope be happy when he poor wretch 
will be alas who can say what 

adieu my dearest friend may you be happy and then your clarissa
cannot be wholly miserable 


contents of volume vii


letter i miss howe to clarissa 
beseeches her to take comfort and not despair is dreadfully
apprehensive of her own safety from mr lovelace an instruction to
mothers 

letter ii clarissa to miss howe 
averse as she is to appear in a court of justice against lovelace she
will consent to prosecute him rather than miss howe shall live in
terror hopes she shall not despair but doubts not from so many
concurrent circumstances that the blow is given 

letter iii iv lovelace to belford 
has no subject worth writing upon now he has lost his clarissa half in
jest half in earnest  as usual with him when vexed or disappointed   he
deplores the loss of her humourous account of lord m of himself and
of his two cousins montague his clarissa has made him eyeless and
senseless to every other beauty 

letter v vi vii viii from the same 
lady sarah sadleir and lady betty lawrance arrive and engage lord m and
his two cousins montague against him on account of his treatment of the
lady his trial as he calls it after many altercations they obtain
his consent that his two cousins should endeavour to engage miss howe to
prevail upon clarissa to accept of him on his unfeigned repentance it
is some pleasure to him he however rakishly reflects to observe how
placable the ladies of his family would have been had they met with a
lovelace marriage says he with these women is an atonement for the
worst we can do to them a true dramatic recompense he makes several
other whimsical but characteristic observations some of which may serve
as cautions and warnings to the sex 

letter ix miss howe to clarissa 
has had a visit from the two miss montague's their errand advises her
to marry lovelace reasons for her advice 

letter x miss howe to clarissa 
chides her with friendly impatience for not answering her letter 
re-urges her to marry lovelace and instantly to put herself under lady
betty's protection 

letter xi miss howe to miss montague 
in a phrensy of her soul writes to her to demand news of her beloved
friend spirited away as she apprehends by the base arts of the
blackest of men 

letter xii lovelace to belford 
the suffering innocent arrested and confined by the execrable woman in
a sham action he curses himself and all his plots and contrivances 
conjures him to fly to her and clear him of this low this dirty
villany to set her free without conditions and assure her that he will
never molest her more horribly execrates the diabolical women who
thought to make themselves a merit with him by this abominable insult 

letter xiii xiv miss montague to miss howe 
with the particulars of all that has happened to the lady mr lovelace
the most miserable of men reflections on libertines she her sister 
lady betty lady sarah lord m and lovelace himself all sign letters
to miss howe asserting his innocence of this horrid insult and
imploring her continued interest in his and their favour with clarissa 

letter xv belford to lovelace 
particulars of the vile arrest insolent visits of the wicked women to
her her unexampled meekness and patience her fortitude he admires
it and prefers it to the false courage of men of their class 

letter xvi from the same 
goes to the officer's house a description of the horrid prison-room 
and of the suffering lady on her knees in one corner of it her great
and moving behaviour breaks off and sends away his letter on purpose
to harass him by suspense 

letter xvii lovelace to belford 
curses him for his tormenting abruption clarissa never suffered half
what he suffers that sex made to bear pain conjures him to hasten to
him the rest of his soul-harrowing intelligence 

letter xviii belford to lovelace 
his farther proceedings the lady returns to her lodgings at smith's 
distinction between revenge and resentment in her character sends her 
from the vile women all her apparel as lovelace had desired 

letter xix belford to lovelace 
rejoices to find he can feel will endeavour from time to time to add to
his remorse insists upon his promise not to molest the lady 

letter xx from the same 
describes her lodgings and gives a character of the people and of the
good widow lovick she is so ill that they provide her an honest nurse 
and send for mr goddard a worthy apothecary substance of a letter to
miss howe dictated by the lady 

letter xxi from the same 
admitted to the lady's presence what passed on the occasion really
believes that she still loves him has a reverence and even a holy love
for her astonished that lovelace could hold his purposes against such
an angel of a woman condemns him for not timely exerting himself to
save her 

letter xxii from the same 
dr h called in not having a single guinea to give him she accepts of
three from mrs lovick on a diamond ring her dutiful reasons for
admitting the doctor's visit his engaging and gentlemanly behaviour 
she resolves to part with some of her richest apparel her reasons 

letter xxiii lovelace to belford 
raves at him for what rallies him with his usual gayety on several
passages in his letters reasons why clarissa's heart cannot be broken
by what she has suffered passionate girls easily subdued sedate ones
hardly ever pardon he has some retrograde motions yet is in earnest to
marry clarissa gravely concludes that a person intending to marry
should never be a rake his gay resolutions renews however his
promises not to molest her a charming encouragement for a man of
intrigue when a woman is known not to love her husband advantages
which men have over women when disappointed in love he knows she will
permit him to make her amends after she has plagued him heartily 

letter xxiv miss howe to clarissa 
is shocked at receiving a letter from her written by another hand 
tenderly consoles her and inveighs against lovelace re-urges her 
however to marry him her mother absolutely of her opinion praises
mr hickman's sister who with her lord had paid her a visit 

letter xxv clarissa to miss howe 
her condition greatly mended in what particulars her mind begins to
strengthen and she finds herself at times superior to her calamities 
in what light she wishes her to think of her desires her to love her
still but with a weaning love she is not now what she was when they
were inseparable lovers their views must now be different 

letter xxvi belford to lovelace 
a consuming malady and a consuming mistress as in belton's case 
dreadful things to struggle with farther reflections on the life of
keeping the poor man afraid to enter into his own house belford
undertakes his cause instinct in brutes equivalent to natural affection
in men story of the ancient sarmatians and their slaves reflects on
the lives of rakes and free-livers and how ready they are in sickness
to run away from one another picture of a rake on a sick bed will
marry and desert them all 

letter xxvii from the same 
the lady parts with some of her laces instances of the worthiness of
dr h and mr goddard he severely reflects upon lovelace 

letter xxviii lovelace to belford 
has an interview with mr hickman on what occasion he endeavours to
disconcert him by assurance and ridicule but finds him to behave with
spirit 

letter xxix from the same 
rallies him on his intentional reformation ascribes the lady's ill
health entirely to the arrest in which he says he had no hand and
to her relations' cruelty makes light of her selling her clothes and
laces touches upon belton's case distinguishes between companionship
and friendship how he purposes to rid belton of his thomasine and her
cubs 

letter xxx belford to lovelace 
the lady has written to her sister to obtain a revocation of her
father's malediction defends her parents he pleads with the utmost
earnestness to her for his friend 

letter xxxi from the same 
can hardly forbear prostration to her tenders himself as her banker 
conversation on this subject admires her magnanimity no wonder that a
virtue so solidly based could baffle all his arts other instances of
her greatness of mind mr smith and his wife invite him and beg of her
to dine with them it being their wedding day her affecting behaviour
on the occasion she briefly and with her usual noble simplicity 
relates to them the particulars of her life and misfortunes 

letter xxxii lovelace to belford 
ridicules him on his address to the lady as her banker and on his
aspirations and prostrations wants to come at letters she has written 
puts him upon engaging mrs lovick to bring this about weight that
proselytes have with the good people that convert them reasons for it 
he has hopes still of the lady's favour and why never adored her so
much as now is about to go to a ball at colonel ambrose's who to be
there censures affectation and finery in the dress of men and
particularly with a view to exalt himself ridicules belford on this
subject 

letter xxxiii xxxiv xxxv xxxvi xxxvii 
sharp letters that pass between miss howe and arabella harlowe 

letter xxxviii mrs harlowe to mrs howe 
sent with copies of the five foregoing letters 

letter xxxix mrs howe to mrs harlowe in answer 

letter xl miss howe to clarissa 
desires an answer to her former letters for her to communicate to miss
montague farther enforces her own and her mother's opinion that she
should marry lovelace is obliged by her mother to go to a ball at
colonel ambrose's fervent professions of her friendly love 

letter xli clarissa to miss howe 
her noble reasons for refusing lovelace desires her to communicate
extracts from this letter to the ladies of his family 

letter xlii from the same 
begs for her sake that she will forbear treating her relations with
freedom and asperity endeavours in her usual dutiful manner to defend
their conduct towards her presses her to make mr hickman happy 

letter xliii mrs norton to clarissa 
excuses her long silence her family who were intending to favour her 
incensed against her by means of miss howe's warm letters to her sister 

letter xliv clarissa to mrs norton 
is concerned that miss howe should write about her to her friends gives
her a narrative of all that has befallen her since her last her truly
christian frame of mind makes reflections worthy of herself upon her
present situation and upon her hopes with regard to a happy futurity 

letter xlv 
copy of clarissa's humble letter to her sister imploring the revocation
of her father's heavy malediction 

letter xlvi belford to lovelace 
defends the lady from the perverseness he lovelace imputes to her on
parting with some of her apparel poor belton's miserable state both of
body and mind observations on the friendship of libertines admires
the noble simplicity and natural ease and dignity of style of the
sacred books expatiates upon the pragmatical folly of man those who
know least the greatest scoffers 

letter xlvii from the same 
the lady parts with one of her best suits of clothes reflections upon
such purchasers as take advantage of the necessities of their
fellow-creatures self an odious devil a visible alteration in the
lady for the worse she gives him all mr lovelace's letters he
 belford takes this opportunity to plead for him mr hickman comes to
visit her 

letter xlviii from the same 
breakfasts next morning with the lady and mr hickman his advantageous
opinion of that gentleman censures the conceited pride and
narrow-mindedness of rakes and libertines tender and affecting parting
between mr hickman and the lady observations in praise of intellectual
friendship 

letter xlix miss howe to clarissa 
has no notion of coldness in friendship is not a daughter of those whom
she so freely treats delays giving the desired negative to the
solicitation of the ladies of lovelace's family and why has been
exceedingly fluttered by the appearance of lovelace at the ball given by
colonel ambrose what passed on that occasion her mother and all the
ladies of their select acquaintance of opinion that she should accept of
him 

letter l clarissa in answer 
chides her for suspending the decisive negative were she sure she
should live many years she would not have mr lovelace censures of the
world to be but of second regard with any body method as to devotion
and exercise she was in when so cruelly arrested 

letter li clarissa to miss howe 
designed to be communicated to mr lovelace's relations 

letter lii liii lovelace to belford 
two letters entirely characteristic yet intermingled with lessons and
observations not unworthy of a better character he has great hopes from
miss howe's mediation in his favour picture of two rakes turned
hermits in their penitentials 

letter liv miss howe to clarissa 
she now greatly approves of her rejection of lovelace admires the noble
example she has given her sex of a passion conquered is sorry she wrote
to arabella but cannot imitate her in her self-accusations and
acquittals of others who are all in fault her notions of a husband's
prerogative hopes she is employing herself in penning down the
particulars of her tragical story use to be made of it to the advantage
of her sex her mother earnest about it 

letter lv miss howe to miss montague 
with clarissa's letter no xli of this volume her own sentiments of
the villanous treatment her beloved friend had met with from their
kinsman prays for vengeance upon him if she do not recover 

letter lvi mrs norton to clarissa 
acquaints her with some of their movements at harlowe-place almost
wishes she would marry the wicked man and why useful reflections on
what has befallen a young lady so universally beloved must try to move
her mother in her favour but by what means will not tell her unless
she succeed 

letter lvii mrs norton to mrs harlowe 

letter lviii mrs harlowe's affecting answer 

letter lix clarissa to mrs norton 
earnestly begs for reasons equally generous and dutiful that she may be
left to her own way of working with her relations has received her
sister's answer to her letter no xlv of this volume she tries to
find an excuse for the severity of it though greatly affected by it 
other affecting and dutiful reflections 

letter lx her sister's cruel letter mentioned in the preceding 

letter lxi clarissa to miss howe 
is pleased that she now at last approved of her rejecting lovelace 
desires her to be comforted as to her promises that she will not run
away from life hopes she has already got above the shock given her by
the ill treatment she has met with from lovelace has had an escape 
rather than a loss impossible were it not for the outrage that she
could have been happy with him and why sets in the most affecting the
most dutiful and generous lights the grief of her father mother and
other relations on her account had begun the particulars of her
tragical story but would fain avoid proceeding with it and why opens
her design to make mr belford her executor and gives her reasons for
it her father having withdrawn his malediction she now has only a last
blessing to supplicate for 

letter lxii clarissa to her sister 
beseeching her in the most humble and earnest manner to procure her a
last blessing 

letter lxiii mrs norton to clarissa 
mr brand to be sent up to inquire after her way of life and health his
pedantic character believes they will withhold any favour till they
hear his report doubts not that matters will soon take a happy turn 

letter lxiv clarissa in answer 
the grace she asks for is only a blessing to die with not to live with 
their favour if they design her any may come too late doubts her
mother can do nothing for her of herself a strong confederacy against a
poor girl their daughter sister niece her brother perhaps got it
renewed before he went to edinburgh he needed not says she his work
is done and more than done 

letter lxv lovelace to belford 
is mortified at receiving letters of rejection charlotte writes to the
lady in his favour in the name of all the family every body approves
of what she has written and he has great hopes from it 

letter lxvi copy of miss montague's letter to clarissa 
beseeching her in the names of all their noble family to receive
lovelace to favour 

letter lxvii belford to lovelace 
proposes to put belton's sister into possession of belton's house for
him the lady visibly altered for the worse again insists upon his
promise not to molest her 

letter lxviii clarissa to miss montague 
in answer to her's no lxvi 

letter lxix belford to lovelace 
has just now received a letter from the lady which he encloses 
requesting extracts form the letters written to him by mr lovelace
within a particular period the reasons which determine him to oblige
her 

letter lxx belford to clarissa 
with the requested extracts and a plea in his friend's favour 

letter lxxi clarissa to belford 
thanks him for his communications requests that he will be her
executor and gives her reasons for her choice of him for that solemn
office 

letter lxxii belford to clarissa 
his cheerful acceptance of the trust 

letter lxxiii belford to lovelace 
brief account of the extracts delivered to the lady tells him of her
appointing him her executor the melancholy pleasure he shall have in
the perusal of her papers much more lively and affecting says he must
be the style of those who write in the height of a present distress than
the dry narrative unanimated style of a person relating difficulties
surmounted can be 

letter lxxiv arabella to clarissa 
in answer to her letter no lxii requesting a last blessing 

letter lxxv clarissa to her mother 
written in the fervour of her spirit yet with the deepest humility and
on her knees imploring her blessing and her father's as what will
sprinkle comfort through her last hours 

letter lxxvi miss montague to clarissa 
in reply to her's no lxviii all their family love and admire her 
their kinsman has not one friend among them beseech her to oblige them
with the acceptance of an annuity and the first payment now sent her at
least till she can be put in possession of her own estate this letter
signed by lord m lady sarah lady betty and her sister and self 

letter lxxvii lovelace to belford 
raves against the lady for rejecting him yet adores her the more for it 
has one half of the house to himself and that the best having forbid
lord m and the ladies to see him in return for their forbidding him to
see them incensed against belford for the extracts he has promised from
his letters is piqued to death at her proud refusal of him curses the
vile women and their potions but for these latter the majesty of her
virtue he says would have saved her as it did once before 

letter lxxviii lovelace to belford 
he shall not he tells him be her executor nobody shall be any thing
to her but himself what a reprobation of a man who was once so dear to
her farther instances of his raving impatience 

letter lxxix lovelace to clarissa 
a letter full of penitence promises praises and admiration of her
virtue has no hopes of escaping from perdition but by her precepts and
example all he begs for the present is a few lines to encourage him to
hope for forgiveness if he can justify his vows by his future conduct 

letter lxxx clarissa to lord m and the ladies of the house 
thankfully declines accepting of their offered bounty pleads for their
being reconciled to their kinsman for reasons respecting her own peace 
hopes that they may be enabled to rejoice in the effects of his
reformation many years after she is laid low and forgotten 

letter lxxxi belford to lovelace 
brief account of his expelling thomasine her sons and her gallant 
farther reflections on keeping a state not calculated for a sick bed 
gives a short journal of what had passed relating to the lady since his
last mr brand inquires after her character and behaviour of mrs 
smith his starchedness conceit and pedantry 

letter lxxxii from the same 
farther particulars relating to the lady power left her by her
grandfather's will 

letter lxxxiii clarissa to lovelace 
in answer to his letter no lxxix 

letter lxxxiv her uncle harlowe's cruel answer 
in answer to her's to her mother no lxxv meditation stitched to it
with black silk 

letter lxxxv clarissa to her uncle harlowe in reply 




the history

of

clarissa harlowe



letter i

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
wed night july 12 


i write my dearest creature i cannot but write to express my concern
on your dejection let me beseech you my charming excellence let me
beseech you not to give way to it 

comfort yourself on the contrary in the triumphs of a virtue unsullied 
a will wholly faultless who could have withstood the trials you have
surmounted your cousin morden will soon come he will see justice done
you i make no doubt as well with regard to what concerns your person as
your estate and many happy days may you yet see and much good may you
still do if you will not heighten unavoidable accidents into guilty
despondency 

but why why my dear this pining solicitude continued after a
reconciliation with relations as unworthy as implacable whose wills are
governed by an all-grasping brother who finds his account in keeping the
breach open on this over-solicitude it is now plain to me that the
vilest of men built all his schemes he saw that you thirsted after it
beyond all reason for hope the view the hope i own extremely
desirable had your family been christians or even had they been pagans
who had had bowels 

i shall send this short letter  i am obliged to make it a short one  by
young rogers as we call him the fellow i sent to you to hampstead an
innocent though pragmatical rustic admit him i pray you into you
presence that he may report to me how you look and how you are 

mr hickman should attend you but i apprehend that all his motions and
mine own too are watched by the execrable wretch and indeed his are by
an agent of mine for i own that i am so apprehensive of his plots and
revenge now i know that he has intercepted my vehement letters against
him that he is the subject of my dreams as well as of my waking fears 


 


my mother at my earnest importunity has just given me leave to write 
and to receive your letters but fastened this condition upon the
concession that your's must be under cover to mr hickman  this is a
view i suppose to give him consideration with me  and upon this
further consideration that she is to see all we write when girls are
set upon a point  she told one who told me again it is better for a
mother if possible to make herself of their party than to oppose them 
since there will be then hopes that she will still hold the reins in her
own hands 

pray let me know what the people are with whom you lodge shall i send
mrs townsend to direct you to lodgings either more safe or more
convenient for you 

be pleased to write to me by rogers who will wait on you for your
answer at your own time 

adieu my dearest creature comfort yourself as you would in the like
unhappy circumstances comfort

your own
anna howe 



letter ii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
thursday july 13 


i am extremely concerned my dear miss howe for being primarily the
occasion of the apprehensions you have of this wicked man's vindictive
attempts what a wide-spreading error is mine 

if i find that he has set foot on any machination against you or against
mr hickman i do assure you i will consent to prosecute him although i
were sure i could not survive my first appearance at the bar he should be
arraigned at 

i own the justice of your mother's arguments on that subject but must
say that i think there are circumstances in my particular case which
will excuse me although on a slighter occasion than that you are
apprehensive of i should decline to appear against him i have said 
that i may one day enter more particularly into this argument 

your messenger has now indeed seen me i talked with him on the cheat
put upon him at hampstead and am sorry to have reason to say that had
not the poor young man been very simple and very self-sufficient he had
not been so grossly deluded mrs bevis has the same plea to make for
herself a good-natured thoughtless woman not used to converse with so
vile and so specious a deceiver as him who made his advantage of both
these shallow creatures 

i think i cannot be more private than where i am i hope i am safe all
the risque i run is in going out and returning from morning-prayers 
which i have two or three times ventured to do once at lincoln's-inn
chapel at eleven once at st dunstan's fleet-street at seven in the
morning in a chair both times and twice at six in the morning at the
neighbouring church in covent-garden the wicked wretches i have escaped
from will not i hope come to church to look for me especially at so
early prayers and i have fixed upon the privatest pew in the latter
church to hide myself in and perhaps i may lay out a little matter in an
ordinary gown by way of disguise my face half hid by my mob i am very
careless my dear of my appearance now neat and clean takes up the
whole of my attention 


 the seven-o'clock prayers at st dunstan's have been since
discontinued 


the man's name at whose house i belong is smith a glove maker as well
as seller his wife is the shop-keeper a dealer also in stockings 
ribbands snuff and perfumes a matron-like woman plain-hearted and
prudent the husband an honest industrious man and they live in good
understanding with each other a proof with me that their hearts are
right for where a married couple live together upon ill terms it is a
sign i think that each knows something amiss of the other either with
regard to temper or morals which if the world knew as well as
themselves it would perhaps as little like them as such people like each
other happy the marriage where neither man nor wife has any wilful or
premeditated evil in their general conduct to reproach the other with 
for even persons who have bad hearts will have a veneration for those who
have good ones 

two neat rooms with plain but clean furniture on the first floor are
mine one they call the dining-room 

there is up another pair of stairs a very worthy widow-lodger mrs 
lovick by name who although of low fortunes is much respected as mrs 
smith assures me by people of condition of her acquaintance for her
piety prudence and understanding with her i propose to be well
acquainted 

i thank you my dear for your kind your seasonable advice and
consolation i hope i shall have more grace given me than to despond in
the religious sense of the word especially as i can apply to myself the
comfort you give me that neither my will nor my inconsiderateness has
contributed to my calamity but nevertheless the irreconcilableness of
my relations whom i love with an unabated reverence my apprehensions of
fresh violences  this wicked man i doubt will not let me rest  my
being destitute of protection my youth my sex my unacquaintedness with
the world subjecting me to insults my reflections on the scandal i have
given added to the sense of the indignities i have received from a man 
of whom i deserved not ill all together will undoubtedly bring on the
effect that cannot be undesirable to me the situation and as i
presume to imagine from principles which i hope will in due time and
by due reflection set me above the sense of all worldly disappointments 

at present my head is much disordered i have not indeed enjoyed it
with any degree of clearness since the violence done to that and to my
heart too by the wicked arts of the abandoned creatures i was cast
among 

i must have more conflicts at times i find myself not subdued enough to
my condition i will welcome those conflicts as they come as
probationary ones but yet my father's malediction the temporary part
so strangely and so literally completed i cannot however think when
my mind is strongest but what is the story of isaac and jacob and
esau and of rebekah's cheating the latter of the blessing designed for
him in favour of jacob given us for in the 27th chapter of genesis 
my father used i remember to enforce the doctrine deducible from it on
his children by many arguments at least therefore he must believe
there is great weight in the curse he has announced and shall i not be
solicitous to get it revoked that he may not hereafter be grieved for
my sake that he did not revoke it 

all i will at present add are my thanks to your mother for her
indulgence to us due compliments to mr hickman and my request that
you will believe me to be to my last hour and beyond it if possible 
my beloved friend and my dearer self for what is now myself 

your obliged and affectionate
clarissa harlowe 



letter iii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
friday july 7 


i have three of thy letters at once before me to answer in each of which
thou complainest of my silence and in one of them tallest me that thou
canst not live without i scribble to thee every day or every other day
at least 

why then die jack if thou wilt what heart thinkest thou can i
have to write when i have lost the only subject worth writing upon 

help me again to my angel to my clarissa and thou shalt have a letter
from me or writing at least part of a letter every hour all that the
charmer of my heart shall say that will i put down every motion every
air of her beloved person every look will i try to describe and when
she is silent i will endeavour to tell thee her thoughts either what
they are or what i would have them to be so that having her i shall
never want a subject having lost her my whole soul is a blank the
whole creation round me the elements above beneath and every thing i
behold for nothing can i enjoy are a blank without her 

oh return return thou only charmer of my soul return to thy adoring
lovelace what is the light what the air what the town what the
country what's any thing without thee light air joy harmony in my
notion are but parts of thee and could they be all expressed in one
word that word would be clarissa 

o my beloved clarissa return thou then once more return to bless thy
lovelace who now by the loss of thee knows the value of the jewel he
has slighted and rises every morning but to curse the sun that shines
upon every body but him 


 


well but jack tis a surprising thing to me that the dear fugitive
cannot be met with cannot be heard of she is so poor a plotter for
plotting is not her talent that i am confident had i been at liberty 
i should have found her out before now although the different emissaries
i have employed about town round the adjacent villages and in miss
howe's vicinage have hitherto failed of success but my lord continues
so weak and low-spirited that there is no getting from him i would not
disoblige a man whom i think in danger still for would his gout now it
has got him down but give him like a fair boxer the rising-blow all
would be over with him and here  pox of his fondness for me it happens
at a very bad time  he makes me sit hours together entertaining him with
my rogueries a pretty amusement for a sick man and yet whenever he
has the gout he prays night and morning with his chaplain but what
must his notions of religion be who after he has nosed and mumbled over
his responses can give a sigh or groan of satisfaction as if he thought
he had made up with heaven and return with a new appetite to my stories 
 encouraging them by shaking his sides with laughing at them and
calling me a sad fellow in such an accent as shows he takes no small
delight in his kinsman 

the old peer has been a sinner in his day and suffers for it now a
sneaking sinner sliding rather than rushing into vices for fear of his
reputation paying for what he never had and never daring to rise to
the joy of an enterprise at first hand which could bring him within view
of a tilting or of the honour of being considered as a principal man in
a court of justice 

to see such an old trojan as this just dropping into the grave which i
hoped ere this would have been dug and filled up with him crying out
with pain and grunting with weakness yet in the same moment crack his
leathern face into an horrible laugh and call a young sinner charming
varlet encoreing him as formerly he used to do to the italian eunuchs 
what a preposterous what an unnatural adherence to old habits 

my two cousins are generally present when i entertain as the old peer
calls it those stories must drag horribly that have not more hearers
and applauders than relaters 

applauders 

ay belford applauders repeat i for although these girls pretend to
blame me sometimes for the facts they praise my manner my invention my
intrepidity besides what other people call blame that call i praise 
i ever did and so i very early discharged shame that cold-water damper
to an enterprising spirit 

these are smart girls they have life and wit and yesterday upon
charlotte's raving against me upon a related enterprise i told her that
i had had in debate several times whether she were or were not too near
of kin to me and that it was once a moot point with me whether i could
not love her dearly for a month or so and perhaps it was well for her 
that another pretty little puss started up and diverted me just as i
was entering upon the course 

they all three held up their hands and eyes at once but i observed
that though the girls exclaimed against me they were not so angry at
this plain speaking as i have found my beloved upon hints so dark that
i have wondered at her quick apprehension 

i told charlotte that grave as she pretended to be in her smiling
resentments on this declaration i was sure i should not have been put to
the expense of above two or three stratagems for nobody admired a good
invention more than she could i but have disentangled her conscience
from the embarrasses of consanguinity 

she pretended to be highly displeased so did her sister for her i told
her she seemed as much in earnest as if she had thought me so and dared
the trial plain words i said in these cases were more shocking to
their sex than gradatim actions and i bid patty not be displeased at my
distinguishing her sister since i had a great respect for her likewise 

an italian air in my usual careless way a half-struggled-for kiss from
me and a shrug of the shoulder by way of admiration from each pretty
cousin and sad sad fellow from the old peer attended with a
side-shaking laugh made us all friends 

there jack wilt thou or wilt thou not take this for a letter 
there's quantity i am sure how have i filled a sheet not a short-hand
one indeed without a subject my fellow shall take this for he is
going to town and if thou canst think tolerably of such execrable
stuff i will send thee another 



letter iv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
six saturday morning july 8 


have i nothing new nothing diverting in my whimsical way thou askest 
in one of thy three letters before me to entertain thee with and thou
tallest me that when i have least to narrate to speak in the scottish
phrase i am most diverting a pretty compliment either to thyself or
to me to both indeed a sign that thou hast as frothy a heart as i a
head but canst thou suppose that this admirable woman is not all is
not every thing with me yet i dread to think of her too for detection
of all my contrivances i doubt must come next 

the old peer is also full of miss harlowe and so are my cousins he
hopes i will not be such a dog  there's a specimen of his peer-like
dialect  as to think of doing dishonourably by a woman of so much merit 
beauty and fortune and he says of so good a family but i tell him 
that this is a string he must not touch that it is a very tender point 
in short is my sore place and that i am afraid he would handle it too
roughly were i to put myself in the power of so ungentle an operator 

he shakes his crazy head he thinks all is not as it should be between
us longs to have me present her to him as my wife and often tells me
what great things he will do additional to his former proposals and
what presents he will make on the birth of the first child but i hope
the whole of his estate will be in my hands before such an event takes
place no harm in hoping jack lord m says were it not for hope the
heart would break 


 


eight o'clock at midsummer and these lazy varletesses in full health 
not come down yet to breakfast what a confounded indecency in young
ladies to let a rake know that they love their beds so dearly and at
the same time where to have them but i'll punish them they shall
breakfast with their old uncle and yawn at one another as if for a
wager while i drive my phaeton to colonel ambroses's who yesterday gave
me an invitation both to breakfast and dine on account of two yorkshire
nieces celebrated toasts who have been with him this fortnight past 
and who he says want to see me so jack all women do not run away
from me thank heaven i wish i could have leave of my heart since the
dear fugitive is so ungrateful to drive her out of it with another
beauty but who can supplant her who can be admitted to a place in it
after miss clarissa harlowe 

at my return if i can find a subject i will scribble on to oblige
thee 

my phaeton's ready my cousins send me word they are just coming down 
so in spite i'll be gone 


saturday afternoon 

i did stay to dine with the colonel and his lady and nieces but i
could not pass the afternoon with them for the heart of me there was
enough in the persons and faces of the two young ladies to set me upon
comparisons particular features held my attention for a few moments 
but these served but to whet my impatience to find the charmer of my
soul who for person for air for mind never had any equal my heart
recoiled and sickened upon comparing minds and conversation pert wit a
too-studied desire to please each in high good humour with herself an
open-mouth affectation in both to show white teeth as if the principal
excellence and to invite amorous familiarity by the promise of a sweet
breath at the same time reflecting tacitly upon breaths arrogantly
implied to be less pure 

once i could have borne them 

they seemed to be disappointed that i was so soon able to leave them 
yet have i not at present so much vanity  my clarissa has cured me of my
vanity  as to attribute their disappointment so much to particular liking
of me as to their own self-admiration they looked upon me as a
connoisseur in beauty they would have been proud of engaging my
attention as such but so affected so flimsy-witted mere skin-deep
beauties they had looked no farther into themselves than what their
glasses were flattering-glasses too for i thought them passive-faced 
and spiritless with eyes however upon the hunt for conquests and
bespeaking the attention of others in order to countenance their own 
 i believe i could with a little pains have given them life and
soul and to every feature of their faces sparkling information but my
clarissa o belford my clarissa has made me eyeless and senseless to
every other beauty do thou find her for me as a subject worthy of my
pen or this shall be the last from

thy
lovelace 




letter v

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday night july 9 


now jack have i a subject with a vengeance i am in the very height of
my trial for all my sins to my beloved fugitive for here to-day at
about five o'clock arrived lady sarah sadleir and lady betty lawrance 
each in her chariot-and-six dowagers love equipage and these cannot
travel ten miles without a sett and half a dozen horsemen 

my time had hung heavy upon my hands and so i went to church after
dinner why may not handsome fellows thought i like to be looked at 
as well as handsome wenches i fell in when service was over with
major warneton and so came not home till after six and was surprised 
at entering the court-yard here to find it littered with equipages and
servants i was sure the owners of them came for no good to me 

lady sarah i soon found was raised to this visit by lady betty who has
health enough to allow her to look out to herself and out of her own
affairs for business yet congratulation to lord m on his amendment 
 spiteful devils on both accounts   was the avowed errand but coming in
my absence i was their principal subject and they had opportunity to
set each other's heart against me 

simon parsons hinted this to me as i passed by the steward's office for
it seems they talked loud and he was making up some accounts with old
pritchard 

however i hastened to pay my duty to them other people not performing
theirs is no excuse for the neglect of our own you know 


 and now i enter upon my trial 


with horrible grave faces was i received the two antiquities only bowed
their tabby heads making longer faces than ordinary and all the old
lines appearing strong in their furrowed foreheads and fallen cheeks how
do you cousin and how do you mr lovelace looking all round at one
another as who should say do you speak first and do you for they
seemed resolved to lose no time 

i had nothing for it but an air as manly as theirs was womanly your
servant madam to lady betty and your servant madam i am glad to see
you abroad to lady sarah 

i took my seat lord m looked horribly glum his fingers claspt and
turning round and round under and over his but just disgouted thumb 
his sallow face and goggling eyes on his two kinswomen by turns but
not once deigning to look upon me 

then i began to think of the laudanum and wet cloth i told thee of long
ago and to call myself in question for a tenderness of heart that will
never do me good 

at last mr lovelace cousin lovelace hem hem i am sorry 
very sorry hesitated lady sarah that there is no hope of your ever
taking up 

what's the matter now madam 

the matter now why lady betty has two letters from miss harlowe 
which have told us what's the matter are all women alike with you 

yes i could have answered bating the difference which pride makes 

then they all chorus'd upon me such a character as miss harlowe's 
cried one a lady of so much generosity and good sense another how
charmingly she writes the two maiden monkeys looking at her find
handwriting her perfections my crimes what can you expect will be the
end of these things cried lady sarah d d d d doings vociferated
the peer shaking his loose-fleshe'd wabbling chaps which hung on his
shoulders like an old cow's dewlap 

for my part i hardly knew whether to sing or say what i had to reply to
these all-at-once attacks upon me -fair and softly ladies one at a
time i beseech you i am not to be hunted down without being heard i
hope pray let me see these letters i beg you will let me see them 

there they are that's the first read it out if you can 

i opened a letter from my charmer dated thursday june 29 our
wedding-day that was to be and written to lady betty lawrance by the
contents to my great joy i find the dear creature is alive and well 
and in charming spirits but the direction where to send an answer to
was so scratched out that i could not read it which afflicted me much 

she puts three questions in it to lady betty 

1st about a letter of her's dated june 7 congratulating me on my
nuptials and which i was so good as to save lady betty the trouble of
writing a very civil thing of me i think 

again whether she and one of her nieces montague were to go to town on
an old chancery suit  and whether they actually did go to town
accordingly and to hampstead afterwards  and whether they brought to
town from thence the young creature whom they visited  was the subject
of the second and third questions 

a little inquisitive dear rogue and what did she expect to be the
better for these questions but curiosity d d curiosity is the
itch of the sex yet when didst thou know it turned to their benefit 
for they seldom inquire but what they fear and the proverb as my lord
has it says it comes with a fear that is i suppose what they fear
generally happens because there is generally occasion for the fear 

curiosity indeed she avows to be her only motive for these
interrogatories for though she says her ladyship may suppose the
questions are not asked for good to me yet the answer can do me no harm 
nor her good only to give her to understand whether i have told her a
parcel of d d lyes that's the plain english of her inquiry 

well madam said i with as much philosophy as i could assume and may i
ask pray what was your ladyship's answer 

there's a copy of it tossing it to me very disrespectfully 

this answer was dated july 1 a very kind and complaisant one to the
lady but very so-so to her poor kinsman that people can give up their
own flesh and blood with so much ease she tells her how proud all our
family would be of an alliance with such an excellence  she does me
justice in saying how much i adore her as an angel of a woman and begs
of her for i know not how many sakes besides my soul's sake that she
will be so good as to have me for a husband  and answers thou wilt
guess how to the lady's questions 

well madam and pray may i be favoured with the lady's other letter 
i presume it is in reply to your's 

it is said the peer but sir let me ask you a few questions before
you read it give me the letter lady betty 

there it is my lord 

then on went the spectacles and his head moved to the lines a charming
pretty hand i have often heard that this lady is a genius 

and so jack repeating my lord's wise comments and questions will let
thee into the contents of this merciless letter 

monday july 3   reads my lord   let me see that was last monday no
longer ago monday july the third madam i cannot excuse myself' um 
um um um um um  humming inarticulately and skipping   i must own
to you madam that the honour of being related' 

off went the spectacles now tell me sir-r has not this lady lost all
the friends she had in the world for your sake 

she has very implacable friends my lord we all know that 

but has she not lost them all for your sake tell me that 

i believe so my lord 

well then i am glad thou art not so graceless as to deny that 

on went the spectacles again i must own to you madam that the honour
of being related to ladies as eminent for their virtue as for their
descent  very pretty truly saith my lord repeating as eminent for
their virtue as for their descent was at first no small inducement
with me to lend an ear to mr lovelace's address 

there is dignity born-dignity in this lady cried my lord 

lady sarah she would have been a grace to our family 

lady betty indeed she would 

lovel to a royal family i will venture to say 

lord m then what a devil 

lovel please to read on my lord it cannot be her letter if it does
not make you admire her more and more as you read cousin charlotte 
cousin patty pray attend read on my lord 

miss charlotte amazing fortitude 

miss patty only lifted up her dove's eyes 

lord m  reading   and the rather as i was determined had it come
to effect to do every thing in my power to deserve your favourable
opinion 

then again they chorus'd upon me 

a blessed time of it poor i i had nothing for it but impudence 

lovel pray read on my lord i told you how you would all admire her
 or shall i read 

lord m d d assurance  then reading   i had another motive 
which i knew would of itself give me merit with your whole family  they
were all ear   a presumptuous one a punishably-presumptuous one as it
has proved in the hope that i might be an humble mean in the hand of
providence to reclaim a man who had as i thought good sense enough at
bottom to be reclaimed or at least gratitude enough to acknowledge the
intended obligation whether the generous hope were to succeed or not 
 excellent young creature 

excellent young creature echoed the ladies with their handkerchiefs at
their eyes attended with music 

lovel by my soul miss patty you weep in the wrong place you shall
never go with me to a tragedy 

lady betty hardened wretch 

his lordship had pulled off his spectacles to wipe them his eyes were
misty and he thought the fault in his spectacles 

i saw they were all cocked and primed to be sure that is a very pretty
sentence said i that is the excellency of this lady that in every
line as she writes on she improves upon herself pray my lord 
proceed i know her style the next sentence will still rise upon us 

lord m d d fellow  again saddling and reading   but i have
been most egregiously mistaken in mr lovelace   then they all
clamoured again   the only man i persuade myself' 

lovel ladies may persuade themselves to any thing but how can she
answer for what other men would or would not have done in the same
circumstances 

i was forced to say any thing to stifle their outcries pox take ye
altogether thought i as if i had not vexation enough in losing her 

lord m  reading   the only man i persuade myself pretending to be
a gentleman in whom i could have been so much mistaken 

they were all beginning again pray my lord proceed hear hear pray 
ladies hear now my lord be pleased to proceed the ladies are
silent 

so they were lost in admiration of me hands and eyes uplifted 

lord m i will to thy confusion for he had looked over the next
sentence 

what wretches belford what spiteful wretches are poor mortals so
rejoiced to sting one another to see each other stung 

lord m  reading   for while i was endeavouring to save a drowning
wretch i have been not accidentally but premeditatedly and of set
purpose drawn in after him  what say you to that sir-r 

lady s ay sir what say you to this 
lady b 

lovel say why i say it is a very pretty metaphor if it would but
hold but if you please my lord read on let me hear what is further
said and i will speak to it all together 

lord m i will and he has had the glory to add to the list of those
he has ruined a name that i will be bold to say would not have
disparaged his own 

they all looked at me as expecting me to speak 

lovel be pleased to proceed my lord i will speak to this by-and-by 
how came she to know i kept a list i will speak to this by-and-by 

lord m  reading on   and this madam by means that would shock
humanity to be made acquainted with 

then again in a hurry off went the spectacles 

this was a plaguy stroke upon me i thought myself an oak in impudence 
but by my troth this almost felled me 

lord m what say you to this sir-r 

remember jack to read all their sirs in this dialogue with a double rr 
sir-r denoting indignation rather than respect 

they all looked at me as if to see if i could blush 

lovel eyes off my lord eyes off ladies  looking bashfully i
believe   what say i to this my lord why i say that this lady has a
strong manner of expressing herself that's all there are many things
that pass among lovers which a man cannot explain himself upon before
grave people 

lady betty among lovers sir-r but mr lovelace can you say that
this lady behaved either like a weak or a credulous person can you say 

lovel i am ready to do the lady all manner of justice but pray now 
ladies if i am to be thus interrogated let me know the contents of the
rest of the letter that i may be prepared for my defence as you are all
for my arraignment for to be required to answer piecemeal thus 
without knowing what is to follow is a cursed ensnaring way of
proceeding 

they gave me the letter i read it through to myself and by the
repetition of what i said thou wilt guess at the remaining contents 

you shall find ladies you shall find my lord that i will not spare
myself then holding the letter in my hand and looking upon it as a
lawyer upon his brief 

miss harlowe says that when your ladyship   turning to lady betty  
shall know that in the progress to her ruin wilful falsehoods 
repeated forgeries and numberless perjuries were not the least of my
crimes you will judge that she can have no principles that will make her
worthy of an alliance with ladies of your's and your noble sister's
character if she could not from her soul declare that such an
alliance can never now take place 

surely ladies this is passion this is not reason if our family
would not think themselves dishonoured by my marrying a person whom i had
so treated but on the contrary would rejoice that i did her this
justice and if she has come out pure gold from the assay and has
nothing to reproach herself with why should it be an impeachment of her
principles to consent that such an alliance take place 

she cannot think herself the worse justly she cannot for what was done
against her will 

their countenances menaced a general uproar but i proceeded 

your lordship read to us that she had an hope a presumptuous one nay 
a punishably-presumptuous one she calls it that she might be a mean 
in the hand of providence to reclaim me and that this she knew if
effected would give her a merit with you all  but from what would she
reclaim me she had heard you'll say but she had only heard at the
time she entertained that hope that to express myself in the women's
dialect i was a very wicked fellow well and what then why truly 
the very moment she was convinced by her own experience that the charge
against me was more than hearsay and that of consequence i was a fit
subject for her generous endeavours to work upon she would needs give me
up accordingly she flies out and declares that the ceremony which
would repair all shall never take place can this be from any other
motive than female resentment 

this brought them all upon me as i intended it should it was as a tub
to a whale and after i had let them play with it a while i claimed
their attention and knowing that they always loved to hear me prate 
went on 

the lady it is plain thought that the reclaiming of a man from bad
habits was a much easier task than in the nature of things it can be 

she writes as your lordship has read that in endeavouring to save a
drowning wretch she had been not accidentally but premeditatedly and
of set purpose drawn in after him  but how is this ladies you see
by her own words that i am still far from being out of danger myself 
had she found me in a quagmire suppose and i had got out of it by her
means and left her to perish in it that would have been a crime indeed 
 but is not the fact quite otherwise has she not if her allegory
prove what she would have it prove got out herself and left me
floundering still deeper and deeper in what she should have done had
she been in earnest to save me was to join her hand with mine that so
we might by our united strength help one another out i held out my hand
to her and besought her to give me her's but no truly she was
determined to get out herself as fast as she could let me sink or swim 
refusing her assistance against her own principles because she saw i
wanted it you see ladies you see my lord how pretty tinkling words
run away with ears inclined to be musical 

they were all ready to exclaim again but i went on proleptically as a
rhetorician would say before their voices would break out into words 

but my fair accuser says that i have added to the list of those i have
ruined a name that would not have disparaged my own  it is true i
have been gay and enterprising it is in my constitution to be so i
know not how i came by such a constitution but i was never accustomed to
check or controul that you all know when a man finds himself hurried
by passion into a slight offence which however slight will not be
forgiven he may be made desperate as a thief who only intends a
robbery is often by resistance and for self-preservation drawn in to
commit murder 

i was a strange a horrid wretch with every one but he must be a silly
fellow who has not something to say for himself when every cause has its
black and its white side westminster-hall jack affords every day as
confident defences as mine 

but what right proceeded i has this lady to complain of me when she as
good as says here lovelace you have acted the part of a villain by me 
 you would repair your fault but i won't let you that i may have the
satisfaction of exposing you and the pride of refusing you 

but was that the case was that the case would i pretend to say i
would now marry the lady if she would have me 

lovel you find she renounces lady betty's mediation 

lord m  interrupting me   words are wind but deeds are mind what
signifies your cursed quibbling bob say plainly if she will have
you will you have her answer me yes or no and lead us not a
wild-goose chace after your meaning 

lovel she knows i would but here my lord if she thus goes on to
expose herself and me she will make it a dishonour to us both to marry 

charl but how must she have been treated 

lovel  interrupting her   why now cousin charlotte chucking her
under the chin would you have me tell you all that has passed between
the lady and me would you care had you a bold and enterprizing lover 
that proclamation should be made of every little piece of amorous
roguery that he offered to you 

charlotte reddened they all began to exclaim but i proceeded 

the lady says she has been dishonoured' devil take me if i spare
myself by means that would shock humanity to be made acquainted with
them  she is a very innocent lady and may not be a judge of the means
she hints at over-niceness may be under-niceness have you not such a
proverb my lord tantamount to one extreme produces another such
a lady as this may possibly think her case more extraordinary than it is 
this i will take upon me to say that if she has met with the only man in
the world who would have treated her as she says i have treated her i
have met in her with the only woman in the world who would have made such
a rout about a case that is uncommon only from the circumstances that
attend it 

this brought them all upon me hands eyes voices all lifted at once 
but my lord m who has in his head the last seat of retreating lewdness 
as much wickedness as i have in my heart was forced upon the air i
spoke this with and charlotte's and all the rest reddening to make a
mouth that was big enough to swallow up the other half of his face 
crying out to avoid laughing oh oh as if under the power of a gouty
twinge 

hadst thou seen how the two tabbies and the young grimalkins looked at
one another at my lord and at me by turns thou would have been ready
to split thy ugly face just in the middle thy mouth hath already done
half the work and after all i found not seldom in this conversation 
that my humourous undaunted airs forced a smile into my service from the
prim mouths of the young ladies they perhaps had they met with such
another intrepid fellow as myself who had first gained upon their
affections would not have made such a rout as my beloved has done about
such an affair as that we were assembled upon young ladies as i have
observed on an hundred occasions fear not half so much for themselves
as their mothers do for them but here the girls were forced to put on
grave airs and to seem angry because the antiques made the matter of
such high importance yet so lightly sat anger and fellow-feeling at
their hearts that they were forced to purse in their mouths to
suppress the smiles i now-and-then laid out for while the elders
having had roses that is to say daughters of their own and knowing
how fond men are of a trifle would have been very loth to have had
them nipt in the bud without saying to the mother of them by your
leave mrs rose-bush 

the next article of my indictment was for forgery and for personating
of lady betty and my cousin charlotte 

two shocking charges thou'lt say and so they were the peer was
outrageous upon the forgery charge the ladies vowed never to forgive
the personating part 

not a peace-maker among them so we all turned women and scolded 

my lord told me that he believed in his conscience there was not a
viler fellow upon god's earth than me what signifies mincing the
matter said he and that it was not the first time i had forged his
hand 

to this i answered that i supposed when the statute of scandalum
magnatum was framed there were a good many in the peerage who knew
they deserved hard names and that that law therefore was rather made
to privilege their qualities than to whiten their characters 

he called upon me to explain myself with a sir-r so pronounced as to
show that one of the most ignominious words in our language was in his
head 

people i said that were fenced in by their quality and by their
years should not take freedoms that a man of spirit could not put up
with unless he were able heartily to despise the insulter 

this set him in a violent passion he would send for pritchard
instantly let pritchard be called he would alter his will and all
he could leave from me he would 

do do my lord said i i always valued my own pleasure above your
estate but i'll let pritchard know that if he draws he shall sign
and seal 

why what would i do to pritchard shaking his crazy head at me 

only what he or any man else writes with his pen to despoil me of
what i think my right he shall seal with his ears that's all my
lord 

then the two ladies interposed 

lady sarah told me that i carried things a great way and that neither
lord m nor any of them deserved the treatment i gave them 

i said i could not bear to be used ill by my lord for two reasons 
first because i respected his lordship above any man living and next 
because it looked as if i were induced by selfish considerations to
take that from him which nobody else would offer to me 

and what returned he shall be my inducement to take what i do at your
hands hay sir 

indeed cousin lovelace said lady betty with great gravity we do not
any of us as lady sarah says deserve at your hands the treatment you
give us and let me tell you that i don't think my character and your
cousin charlotte's ought to be prostituted in order to ruin an innocent
lady she must have known early the good opinion we all have of her and
how much we wished her to be your wife this good opinion of ours has
been an inducement to her you see she says so to listen to your
address and this with her friends' folly has helped to throw her into
your power how you have requited her is too apparent it becomes the
character we all bear to disclaim your actions by her and let me tell
you that to have her abused by wicked people raised up to personate us 
or any of us makes a double call upon us to disclaim them 

lovel why this is talking somewhat like i would have you all
disclaim my actions i own i have done very vilely by this lady one
step led to another i am curst with an enterprizing spirit i hate
to be foiled 

foiled interrupted lady sarah what a shame to talk at this
rate did the lady set up a contention with you all nobly sincere 
and plain-hearted have i heard miss clarissa harlowe is above art 
above disguise neither the coquette nor the prude poor lady she
deserved a better fare from the man for whom she took the step which
she so freely blames 

this above half affected me had this dispute been so handled by every
one i had been ashamed to look up i began to be bashful 

charlotte asked if i did not still seem inclinable to do the lady
justice if she would accept of me it would be she dared to say the
greatest felicity the family could know she would answer for one that
this fine lady were of it 

they all declared to the same effect and lady sarah put the matter
home to me 

but my lord marplot would have it that i could not be serious for six
minutes together 

i told his lordship that he was mistaken light as he thought i made of
his subject i never knew any that went so near my heart 

miss patty said she was glad to hear that and her soft eyes glistened
with pleasure 

lord m called her sweet soul and was ready to cry 

not from humanity neither jack this peer has no bowels as thou
mayest observe by this treatment of me but when people's minds are
weakened by a sense of their own infirmities and when they are drawing
on to their latter ends they will be moved on the slightest occasions 
whether those offer from within or without them and this frequently 
the unpenetrating world calls humanity when all the time in
compassionating the miseries of human nature they are but pitying
themselves and were they in strong health and spirits would care as
little for any body else as thou or i do 

here broke they off my trial for this sitting lady sarah was much
fatigued it was agreed to pursue the subject in the morning they
all however retired together and went into private conference 



letter vi

mr lovelace
 in continuation  


the ladies instead of taking up the subject where we had laid it down 
must needs touch upon passage in my fair accuser's letter which i was in
hopes they would have let rest as we were in a tolerable way but 
truly they must hear all they could hear of our story and what i had to
say to those passages that they might be better enabled to mediate
between us if i were really and indeed inclined to do her the hoped-for
justice 

these passages were 1st that after i had compulsorily tricked her
into the act of going off with me i carried her to one of the worst
houses in london 

2nd that i had made a wicked attempt upon her in resentment of which
she fled to hampstead privately 

3dly came the forgery and personating charges again and we were upon
the point of renewing out quarrel before we could get to the next
charge which was still worse 

for that 4thly was that having betrayed her back to the vile house i
first robbed her of her senses and then her honour detaining her
afterwards a prisoner there 

were i to tell thee the glosses i put upon these heavy charges what
would it be but repeat many of the extenuating arguments i have used in
my letters to thee suffice it therefore to say that i insisted much 
by way of palliation on the lady's extreme niceness on her diffidence
in my honour on miss howe's contriving spirit plots on their parts
begetting plots on mine on the high passions of the sex i asserted 
that my whole view in gently restraining her was to oblige her to
forgive me and to marry me and this for the honour of both families 
i boasted of my own good qualities some of which none that knew me deny 
and to which few libertines can lay claim 

they then fell into warm admirations and praises of the lady all of them
preparatory as i knew to the grand question and thus it was introduced
by lady sarah 

we have said as much as i think we can say upon these letters of the poor
lady to dwell upon the mischiefs that may ensue from the abuse of a
person of her rank if all the reparation be not made that now can be
made would perhaps be to little purpose but you seem sir still to
have a just opinion of her as well as affection for her her virtue is
not in the least questionable she could not resent as she does had she
any thing to reproach herself with she is by every body's account a
fine woman has a good estate in her own right is of no contemptible
family though i think with regard to her they have acted as
imprudently as unworthily for the excellency of her mind for good
economy the common speech of her as the worthy dr lewen once told me 
is that her prudence would enrich a poor man and her piety reclaim a
licentious one i who have not been abroad twice this twelvemonth came
hither purposely so did lady betty to see if justice may not be done
her and also whether we and my lord m your nearest relations sir 
have or have not any influence over you and for my own part as your
determination shall be in this article such shall be mine with regard
to the disposition of all that is within my power 

lady betty and mine 

and mine said my lord and valiantly he swore to it 

lovel far be it from me to think slightly of favours you may any of
you be glad i would deserve but as far be it from me to enter into
conditions against my own liking with sordid views as to future
mischiefs let them come i have not done with the harlowes yet they
were the aggressors and i should be glad they would let me hear from
them in the way they should hear from me in the like case perhaps i
should not be sorry to be found rather than be obliged to seek on this
occasion 

miss charlotte  reddening   spoke like a man of violence rather than
a man of reason i hope you'll allow that cousin 

lady sarah well but since what is done and cannot be undone let us
think of the next best have you any objection against marrying miss
harlowe if she will have you 

lovel there can possibly be but one that she is to every body no
doubt as well as to lady betty pursuing that maxim peculiar to herself 
 and let me tell you so it ought to be that what she cannot conceal
from herself she will publish to the world 

miss patty the lady to be sure writes this in the bitterness of her
grief and in despair 

lovel and so when her grief is allayed when her despairing fit is
over and this from you cousin patty sweet girl and would you my
dear in the like case  whispering her  have yielded to entreaty would
you have meant no more by the like exclamations 

i had a rap with her fan and blush and from lord m a reflection that
i turn'd into jest every thing they said 

i asked if they thought the harlowes deserved any consideration from me 
and whether that family would not exult over me were i to marry their
daughter as if i dared not to do otherwise 

lady sarah once i was angry with that family as we all were but now
i pity them and think that you have but too well justified the worse
treatment they gave you 

lord m their family is of standing all gentlemen of it and rich 
and reputable let me tell you that many of our coronets would be glad
they could derive their descents from no worse a stem than theirs 

lovel the harlowes are a narrow-souled and implacable family i hate
them and though i revere the lady scorn all relation to them 

lady betty i wish no worse could be said of him who is such a scorner
of common failings in others 

lord m how would my sister lovelace have reproached herself for all
her indulgent folly to this favourite boy of her's had she lived till
now and been present on this occasion 

lady sarah well but begging your lordship's pardon let us see if
any thing can be done for this poor lady 

miss ch if mr lovelace has nothing to object against the lady's
character and i presume to think he is not ashamed to do her justice 
though it may make against himself i cannot but see her honour and
generosity will compel from him all that we expect if there be any
levities any weaknesses to be charged upon the lady i should not open
my lips in her favour though in private i would pity her and deplore
her hard hap and yet even then there might not want arguments from
honour to gratitude in so particular a case to engage you sir to make
good the vows it is plain you have broken 

lady betty my niece charlotte has called upon you so justly and has
put the question to you so properly that i cannot but wish you would
speak to it directly and without evasion 

all in a breath then bespoke my seriousness and my justice and in this
manner i delivered myself assuming an air sincerely solemn 

i am very sensible that the performance of the task you have put me upon
will leave me without excuse but i will not have recourse either to
evasion or palliation 

as my cousin charlotte has severely observed i am not ashamed to do
justice to miss harlowe's merit 

i own to you all and what is more with high regret if not with
shame cousin charlotte that i have a great deal to answer for in my
usage of this lady the sex has not a nobler mind nor a lovelier person
of it and for virtue i could not have believed excuse me ladies 
that there ever was a woman who gave or could have given such
illustrious such uniform proofs of it for in her whole conduct she
has shown herself to be equally above temptation and art and i had
almost said human frailty 

the step she so freely blames herself for taking was truly what she
calls compulsatory for though she was provoked to think of going off
with me she intended it not nor was provided to do so neither would
she ever have had the thought of it had her relations left her free 
upon her offered composition to renounce the man she did not hate in
order to avoid the man she did 

it piqued my pride i own that i could so little depend upon the force
of those impressions which i had the vanity to hope i had made in a heart
so delicate and in my worst devices against her i encouraged myself
that i abused no confidence for none had she in my honour 

the evils she has suffered it would have been more than a miracle had
she avoided her watchfulness rendered more plots abortive than those
which contributed to her fall and they were many and various and all
her greater trials and hardships were owing to her noble resistance and
just resentment 

i know proceeded i how much i condemn myself in the justice i am doing
to this excellent creature but yet i will do her justice and cannot
help it if i would and i hope this shows that i am not so totally
abandoned as i have been thought to be 

indeed with me she has done more honour to her sex in her fall if it
be to be called a fall in truth it ought not than ever any other
could do in her standing 

when at length i had given her watchful virtue cause of suspicion i
was then indeed obliged to make use of power and art to prevent her
escaping from me she then formed contrivances to elude mine but all
her's were such as strict truth and punctilious honour would justify 
she could not stoop to deceit and falsehood no not to save herself 
more than once justly did she tell me fired by conscious worthiness 
that her soul was my soul's superior forgive me ladies for saying 
that till i knew her i questioned a soul in a sex created as i was
willing to suppose only for temporary purposes it is not to be
imagined into what absurdities men of free principle run in order to
justify to themselves their free practices and to make a religion to
their minds and yet in this respect i have not been so faulty as some
others 

no wonder that such a noble creature as this looked upon every studied
artifice as a degree of baseness not to be forgiven no wonder that she
could so easily become averse to the man though once she beheld him with
an eye not wholly indifferent whom she thought capable of premeditated
guilt nor give me leave on the other hand to say is it to be
wondered at that the man who found it so difficult to be forgiven for
the slighter offences and who had not the grace to recede or repent 
 made desperate should be hurried on to the commission of the greater 

in short ladies in a word my lord miss clarissa harlowe is an angel 
if ever there was or could be one in human nature and is and ever was 
as pure as an angel in her will and this justice i must do her although
the question i see by every glistening eye is ready to be asked what
then lovelace art thou  

lord m a devil a d d devil i must answer and may the curse of
god follow you in all you undertake if you do not make her the best
amends now in your power to make her 

lovel from you my lord i could expect no other but from the ladies
i hope for less violence from the ingenuousness of my confession 

the ladies elder and younger had their handkerchiefs to their eyes at
the just testimony which i bore to the merits of this exalted creature 
and which i would make no scruple to bear at the bar of a court of
justice were i to be called to it 

lady betty well sir this is a noble character if you think as you
speak surely you cannot refuse to do the lady all the justice now in
your power to do her 

they all joined in this demand 

i pleaded that i was sure she would not have me that when she had
taken a resolution she was not to be moved unpersuadableness was an
harlowe sin that and her name i told them were all she had of theirs 

all were of opinion that she might in her present desolate
circumstances be brought to forgive me lady sarah said that lady
betty and she would endeavour to find out the noble sufferer as they
justly called her and would take her into their protection and be
guarantees of the justice that i would do her as well after marriage as
before 

it was some pleasure to me to observe the placability of these ladies of
my own family had they any or either of them met with a lovelace but
twould be hard upon us honest fellows jack if all women were
clarissas 

here i am obliged to break off 



letter vii

mr lovelace
 in continuation  


it is much better jack to tell your own story when it must be known 
than to have an adversary tell it for you conscious of this i gave
them a particular account how urgent i had been with her to fix upon the
thursday after i left her it being her uncle harlowe's anniversary
birth-day and named to oblige her for the private celebration having
some days before actually procured a license which still remained with
her 

that not being able to prevail upon her to promise any thing while
under a supposed restraint i offered to leave her at full liberty if
she would give me the least hope for that day but neither did this
offer avail me 

that this inflexibleness making me desperate i resolved to add to my
former fault by giving directions that she should not either go or
correspond out of the house till i returned from m hall well knowing 
that if she were at full liberty i must for ever lose her 

that this constraint had so much incensed her that although i wrote no
less than four different letters i could not procure a single word in
answer though i pressed her but for four words to signify the day and
the church 

i referred to my two cousins to vouch for me the extraordinary methods i
took to send messengers to town though they knew not the occasion which
now i told them was this 

i acquainted them that i even had wrote to you jack and to another
gentleman of whom i thought she had a good opinion to attend her in
order to press for her compliance holding myself in readiness the last
day at salt-hill to meet the messenger they should send and proceed to
london if his message were favourable but that before they could
attend her she had found means to fly away once more and is now said
i perched perhaps somewhere under lady betty's window at glenham-hall 
and there like the sweet philomela a thorn in her breast warbles forth
her melancholy complaints against her barbarous tereus 

lady betty declared that she was not with her nor did she know where she
was she should be she added the most welcome guest to her that she
ever received 

in truth i had a suspicion that she was already in their knowledge and
taken into their protection for lady sarah i imagined incapable of being
roused to this spirit by a letter only from miss harlowe and that not
directed to herself she being a very indolent and melancholy woman but
her sister i find had wrought her up to it for lady betty is as
officious and managing a woman as mrs howe but of a much more generous
and noble disposition she is my aunt jack 

i supposed i said that her ladyship might have a private direction
where to send to her i spoke as i wished i would have given the world
to have heard that she was inclined to cultivate the interest of any of
my family 

lady betty answered that she had no direction but what was in the letter 
which she had scratched out and which it was probable was only a
temporary one in order to avoid me otherwise she would hardly have
directed an answer to be left at an inn and she was of opinion that to
apply to miss howe would be the only certain way to succeed in any
application for forgiveness would i enable that young lady to interest
herself in procuring it 

miss charlotte permit me to make a proposal since we are all of
one mind in relation to the justice due to miss harlowe if mr lovelace
will oblige himself to marry her i will make miss howe a visit little
as i am acquainted with her and endeavour to engage her interest to
forward the desired reconciliation and if this can be done i make no
question but all may be happily accommodated for every body knows the
love there is between miss harlowe and miss howe 

marriage with these women thou seest jack is an atonement for all we
can do to them a true dramatic recompense 

this motion was highly approved of and i gave my honour as desired in
the fullest manner they could wish 

lady sarah well then cousin charlotte begin your treaty with miss
howe out of hand 

lady betty pray do and let miss harlowe be told that i am ready to
receive her as the most welcome of guests and i will not have her out of
my sight till the knot is tied 

lady sarah tell her from me that she shall be my daughter instead of
my poor betsey and shed a tear in remembrance of her lost daughter 

lord m what say you sir to this 

lovel content my lord i speak in the language of your house 

lord m we are not to be fooled nephew no quibbling we will have
no slur put upon us 

lovel you shall not and yet i did not intend to marry if she
exceeded the appointed thursday but i think according to her own
notions that i have injured her beyond reparation although i were to
make her the best of husbands as i am resolved to be if she will
condescend as i will call it to have me and be this cousin
charlotte my part of your commission to say 

this pleased them all 

lord m give me thy hand bob thou talkest like a man of honour at
last i hope we may depend upon what thou sayest 

the ladies eyes put the same question to me 

lovel you may my lord you may ladies absolutely you may 

then was the personal character of the lady as well as her more
extraordinary talents and endowments again expatiated upon and miss
patty who had once seen her launched out more than all the rest in her
praise these were followed by such inquiries as are never forgotten to
be made in marriage-treaties and which generally are the principal
motives with the sages of a family though the least to be mentioned by
the parties themselves and yet even by them perhaps the first thought
of that is to say inquisition into the lady's fortune into the
particulars of the grandfather's estate and what her father and her
single-souled uncles will probably do for her if a reconciliation be
effected as by their means they make no doubt but it will be between
both families if it be not my fault the two venerables  no longer
tabbies with me now  hinted at rich presents on their own parts and my
lord declared that he would make such overtures in my behalf as should
render my marriage with miss harlowe the best day's work i ever made 
and what he doubted not would be as agreeable to that family as to
myself 

thus at present by a single hair hangs over my head the matrimonial
sword and thus ended my trial and thus are we all friends and cousin
and cousin and nephew and nephew at every word 

did ever comedy end more happily than this long trial 



letter viii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wedn july 12 


so jack they think they have gained a mighty point but were i to
change my mind were i to repent i fancy i am safe and yet this very
moment it rises to my mind that tis hard trusting too for surely there
must be some embers where there was fire so lately that may be stirred
up to give a blaze to combustibles strewed lightly upon them love like
some self-propagating plants or roots which have taken strong hold in
the earth when once got deep into the heart is hardly ever totally
extirpated except by matrimony indeed which is the grave of love 
because it allows of the end of love then these ladies all advocates
for herself with herself miss howe at their head perhaps not in
favour to me i don't expect that from miss howe but perhaps in favour
to herself for miss howe has reason to apprehend vengeance from me i
ween her hickman will be safe too as she may think if i marry her
beloved friend for he has been a busy fellow and i have long wished to
have a slap at him the lady's case desperate with her friends too and
likely to be so while single and her character exposed to censure 

a husband is a charming cloke a fig-leaved apron for a wife and for a
lady to be protected in liberties in diversions which her heart pants
after and all her faults even the most criminal were she to be
detected to be thrown upon the husband and the ridicule too a charming
privilege for a wife 

but i shall have one comfort if i marry which pleases me not a little 
if a man's wife has a dear friend of her sex a hundred liberties may be
taken with that friend which could not be taken if the single lady
 knowing what a title to freedoms marriage had given him with her friend 
was not less scrupulous with him than she ought to be as to herself 
then there are broad freedoms shall i call them that may be taken by
the husband with his wife that may not be quite shocking which if the
wife bears before her friends will serve for a lesson to that friend 
and if that friend bears to be present at them without check or
bashfulness will show a sagacious fellow that she can bear as much
herself at proper time and place 

chastity jack like piety is an uniform thing if in look if in
speech a girl give way to undue levity depend upon it the devil has
got one of his cloven feet in her heart already so hickman take care
of thyself i advise thee whether i marry or not 

thus jack have i at once reconciled myself to all my relations and if
the lady refuses me thrown the fault upon her this i knew would be
in my power to do at any time and i was the more arrogant to them in
order to heighten the merit of my compliance 

but after all it would be very whimsical would it not if all my plots
and contrivances should end in wedlock what a punishment should this
come out to be upon myself too that all this while i have been
plundering my own treasury 

and then can there be so much harm done if it can be so easily repaired
by a few magical words as i robert take thee clarissa and i clarissa
take thee robert with the rest of the for-better and for-worse
legerdemain which will hocus pocus all the wrongs the crying wrongs 
that i have done to miss harlowe into acts of kindness and benevolence
to mrs lovelace 

but jack two things i must insist upon with thee if this is to be the
case having put secrets of so high a nature between me and my spouse
into thy power i must for my own honour and for the honour of my wife
and illustrious progeny first oblige thee to give up the letters i have
so profusely scribbled to thee and in the next place do by thee as i
have head whispered in france was done by the true father of a certain
monarque that is to say cut thy throat to prevent thy telling of
tales 

i have found means to heighten the kind opinion my friends here have
begun to have of me by communicating to them the contents of the four
last letters which i wrote to press my elected spouse to solemnize my
lord repeated one of his phrases in my favour that he hopes it will come
out that the devil is not quite so black as he is painted 

now pr'ythee dear jack since so many good consequences are to flow from
these our nuptials one of which to thyself since the sooner thou
diest the less thou wilt have to answer for and that i now-and-then am
apt to believe there may be something in the old fellow's notion who
once told us that he who kills a man has all that man's sins to answer
for as well as his own because he gave him not the time to repent of
them that heaven designed to allow him  a fine thing for thee if thou
consentest to be knocked of the head but a cursed one for the
manslayer   and since there may be room to fear that miss howe will not
give us her help i pr'ythee now exert thyself to find out my clarissa
harlowe that i may make a lovelace of her set all the city bellmen 
and the country criers for ten miles round the metropolis at work with
their oye's and if any man woman or child can give tale or tidings 
 advertise her in all the news-papers and let her know that if she
will repair to lady betty lawrance or to miss charlotte montague she
may hear of something greatly to her advantage 


 


my two cousins montague are actually to set out to-morrow to mrs howe's 
to engage her vixen daughter's interest with her friend they will
flaunt it away in a chariot-and-six for the greater state and
significance 

confounded mortification to be reduced this low my pride hardly knows
how to brook it 

lord m has engaged the two venerables to stay here to attend the issue 
and i standing very high at present in their good graces am to gallant
them to oxford to blenheim and to several other places 



letter ix

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
thursday night july 13 


collins sets not out to-morrow some domestic occasion hinders him 
rogers is but now returned from you and cannot be well spared mr 
hickman is gone upon an affair of my mother's and has taken both his
servants with him to do credit to his employer so i am forced to
venture this by post directed by your assumed name 

i am to acquaint you that i have been favoured with a visit from miss
montague and her sister in lord m s chariot-and-six my lord's
gentleman rode here yesterday with a request that i would receive a
visit from the two young ladies on a very particular occasion the
greater favour if it might be the next day 

as i had so little personal knowledge of either i doubted not but it
must be in relation to the interests of my dear friend and so consulting
with my mother i sent them an invitation to favour me because of the
distance with their company at dinner which they kindly accepted 

i hope my dear since things have been so very bad that their errand to
me will be as agreeable to you as any thing that can now happen they
came in the name of lord m and lady sarah and lady betty his two
sisters to desire my interest to engage you to put yourself into the
protection of lady betty who will not part with you till she sees all
the justice done you that now can be done 

lady sarah had not stirred out for a twelve-month before never since she
lost her agreeable daughter whom you and i saw at mrs benson's but was
induced to take this journey by lady betty purely to procure you
reparation if possible and their joint strength united with lord
m s has so far succeeded that the wretch has bound himself to them 
and to these young ladies in the solemnest manner to wed you in their
presence if they can prevail upon you to give him your hand 

this consolation you may take to yourself that all this honourable
family have a due that is the highest sense of your merit and greatly
admire you the horrid creature has not spared himself in doing justice
to your virtue and the young ladies gave us such an account of his
confessions and self-condemnation that my mother was quite charmed with
you and we all four shed tears of joy that there is one of our sex  i 
that that one is my dearest friend   who has done so much honour to it 
as to deserve the exalted praises given you by a wretch so
self-conceited though pity for the excellent creature mixed with our
joy 

he promises by them to make the best of husbands and my lord and lady
sarah and lady betty are all three to be guarantees that he will be so 
noble settlements noble presents they talked of they say they left
lord m and his two sisters talking of nothing else but of those presents
and settlements how most to do you honour the greater in proportion for
the indignities you have suffered and of changing of names by act of
parliament preparative to the interest they will all join to make to get
the titles to go where the bulk of the estate must go at my lord's
death which they apprehend to be nearer than they wish nor doubt they
of a thorough reformation in his morals from your example and influence
over him 

i made a great many objections for you all i believe that you could
have made yourself had you been present but i have no doubt to advise
you my dear and so does my mother instantly to put yourself into
lady betty's protection with a resolution to take the wretch for your
husband all his future grandeur  he wants not pride  depends upon his
sincerity to you and the young ladies vouch for the depth of his concern
for the wrongs he has done you 

all his apprehension is in your readiness to communicate to every one 
as he fears the evils you have suffered which he thinks will expose you
both but had you not revealed them to lady betty you had not had so
warm a friend since it is owing to two letters you wrote to her that
all this good as i hope it will prove was brought about but i advise
you to be more sparing in exposing what is past whether you have
thoughts of accepting him or not for what my dear can that avail now 
but to give a handle to vile wretches to triumph over your friends since
every one will not know how much to your honour your very sufferings have
been 

your melancholy letter brought by rogers with his account of your
indifferent health confirmed to him by the woman of the house as well
as by your looks and by your faintness while you talked with him would
have given me inexpressible affliction had i not bee cheered by this
agreeable visit from the young ladies i hope you will be equally so on
my imparting the subject of it to you 


 see letter ii of this volume 


indeed my dear you must not hesitate you must oblige them the
alliance is splendid and honourable very few will know any thing of his
brutal baseness to you all must end in a little while in a general
reconciliation and you will be able to resume your course of doing the
good to every deserving object which procured you blessings wherever you
set your foot 

i am concerned to find that your father's inhuman curse affects you so
much as it does yet you are a noble creature to put it as you put it 
i hope you are indeed more solicitous to get it revoked for their sakes
than for your own it is for them to be penitent who hurried you into
evils you could not well avoid you are apt to judge by the unhappy
event rather than upon the true merits of your case upon my honour i
think you faultless almost in every step you have taken what has not
that vilely-insolent and ambitious yet stupid brother of your's to
answer for that spiteful thing your sister too 

but come since what is past cannot be helped let us look forward you
have now happy prospects opening to you a family already noble 
prepared to receive you with open arms and joyful heart and who by
their love to you will teach another family who know not what an
excellence they have confederated to persecute how to value you your
prudence your piety will crown all you will reclaim a wretch that 
for an hundred sakes more than for his own one would wish to be
reclaimed 

like a traveller who has been put out of his way by the overflowing of
some rapid stream you have only had the fore-right path you were in
overwhelmed a few miles about a day or two only lost as i may say 
and you are in a way to recover it and by quickening your speed will
get up the lost time the hurry upon your spirits mean time will be
all your inconvenience for it was not your fault you were stopped in
your progress 

think of this my dear and improve upon the allegory as you know how 
if you can without impeding your progress be the means of assuaging the
inundation of bounding the waters within their natural channel and
thereby of recovering the overwhelmed path for the sake of future
passengers who travel the same way what a merit will your's be 

i shall impatiently expect your next letter the young ladies proposed
that you should put yourself if in town or near it into the reading
stage-coach which inns somewhere in fleet-street and if you give
notice of the day you will be met on the road and that pretty early in
your journey by some of both sexes one of whom you won't be sorry to
see 

mr hickman shall attend you at slough and lady betty herself and one
of the miss montagues with proper equipages will be at reading to
receive you and carry you directly to the seat of the former for i have
expressly stipulated that the wretch himself shall not come into your
presence till your nuptials are to be solemnized unless you give leave 

adieu my dearest friend be happy and hundreds will then be happy of
consequence inexpressibly so i am sure will then be

your ever affectionate
anna howe 



letter x

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
sunday night july 16 


my dearest friend 

why should you permit a mind so much devoted to your service to labour
under such an impatience as you must know it would labour under for want
of an answer to a letter of such consequence to you and therefore to me 
as was mine of thursday night rogers told me on thursday you were so
ill your letter sent by him was so melancholy yet you must be ill
indeed if you could not write something to such a letter were it but a
line to say you would write as soon as you could sure you have
received it the master of your nearest post-office will pawn his
reputation that it went safe i gave him particular charge of it 

god send me good news of your health of your ability to write and then
i will chide you indeed i will as i never yet did chide you 

i suppose your excuse will be that the subject required consideration 
lord my dear so it might but you have so right a mind and the matter
in question is so obvious that you could not want half an hour to
determine then you intended probably to wait collins's call for your
letter as on to-morrow suppose something were to happen as it did on
friday that he should not be able to go to town to-morrow how child 
could you serve me so i know not how to leave off scolding you 

dear honest collins make haste he will he will he sets out and
travels all night for i have told him that the dearest friend i have in
the world has it in her own choice to be happy and to make me so and
that the letter he will bring from her will assure it to me 

i have ordered him to go directly without stopping at the
saracen's-head-inn to you at your lodgings matters are now in so good
a way that he safely may 

your expected letter is ready written i hope if it can be not he will
call for it at your hour 

you can't be so happy as you deserve to be but i doubt not that you will
be as happy as you can that is that you will choose to put yourself
instantly into lady betty's protection if you would not have the wretch
for your own sake have him you must for mine for your family's for
your honour's sake dear honest collins make haste make haste and
relieve the impatient heart of my beloved's

ever faithful ever affectionate 
anna howe 



letter xi

miss howe to miss charlotte montague
tuesday morn july 18 


madam 

i take the liberty to write to you by this special messenger in the
phrensy of my soul i write to you to demand of you and of any of your
family who can tell news of my beloved friend who i doubt has been
spirited away by the base arts of one of the blackest o help me to a
name black enough to call him by her piety is proof against
self-attempts it must it must be he the only wretch who could injure
such an innocent and now who knows what he has done with her 

if i have patience i will give you the occasion of this distracted
vehemence 

i wrote to her the very moment you and your sister left me but being
unable to procure a special messenger as i intended was forced to send
by the post i urged her  you know i promised that i would i urged
her   with earnestness to comply with the desires of all your family 
having no answer i wrote again on sunday night and sent it by a
particular hand who travelled all night chiding her for keeping a heart
so impatient as mine in such cruel suspense upon a matter of so much
importance to her and therefore to me and very angry i was with her in
my mind 

but judge my astonishment my distraction when last night the
messenger returning post-haste brought me word that she had not been
heard of since friday morning and that a letter lay for her at her
lodgings which came by the post and must be mine 

she went out about six that morning only intending as they believe to
go to morning-prayers at covent-garden church just by her lodgings as
she had done divers times before went on foot left word she should be
back in an hour very poorly in health 

lord have mercy upon me what shall i do i was a distracted creature
all last night 

o madam you know not how i love her my own soul is not dearer to me 
than my clarissa harlowe nay she is my soul for i now have none only
a miserable one however for she was the joy the stay the prop of my
life never woman loved woman as we love one another it is impossible
to tell you half her excellencies it was my glory and my pride that i
was capable of so fervent a love of so pure and matchless a creature 
but now who knows whether the dear injured has not all her woes her
undeserved woes completed in death or is not reserved for a worse fate 
 this i leave to your inquiry for your  shall i call the man 
your   relation i understand is still with you 

surely my good ladies you were well authorized in the proposals you
made in presence of my mother surely he dare not abuse your confidence 
and the confidence of your noble relations i make no apology for giving
you this trouble nor for desiring you to favour with a line by this
messenger 

your almost distracted
anna howe 



letter xii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
m hall sat night june 15 


all undone undone by jupiter zounds jack what shall i do now a
curse upon all my plots and contrivances but i have it in the very
heart and soul of me i have it 

thou toldest me that my punishments were but beginning canst thou o
fatal prognosticator cans thou tell me where they will end 

thy assistance i bespeak the moment thou receivest this i bespeak thy
assistance this messenger rides for life and death and i hope he'll
find you at your town-lodgings if he meet not with you at edgware 
where being sunday he will call first 

this cursed cursed woman on friday dispatched man and horse with the
joyful news as she thought it would be to me in an exulting letter from
sally martin that she had found out my angel as on wednesday last and
on friday morning after she had been at prayers at covent-garden church
 praying for my reformation perhaps got her arrested by two sheriff's
officers as she was returning to her lodgings who villains put her
into a chair they had in readiness and carried her to one of the cursed
fellow's houses 

she has arrested her for 150  pretendedly due for board and lodging a
sum besides the low villany of the proceeding which the dear soul could
not possibly raise all her clothes and effects except what she had on
and with her when she went away being at the old devil's 

and here for an aggravation has the dear creature lain already two
days for i must be gallanting my two aunts and my two cousins and
giving lord m an airing after his lying-in pox upon the whole family
of us and returned not till within this hour and now returned to my
distraction on receiving the cursed tidings and the exulting letter 

hasten hasten dear jack for the love of god hasten to the injured
charmer my heart bleeds for her she deserved not this i dare not
stir it will be thought done by my contrivance and if i am absent from
this place that will confirm the suspicion 

damnation seize quick this accursed woman yet she thinks she has made
no small merit with me unhappy thrice unhappy circumstances at a
time too when better prospects were opening for the sweet creature 

hasten to her clear me of this cursed job most sincerely by all
that's sacred i swear you may yet have i been such a villanous
plotter that the charming sufferer will hardly believe it although the
proceeding be so dirtily low 

set her free the moment you see her without conditioning free on your
knees for me beg her pardon and assure her that wherever she goes i
will not molest her no nor come near her without her leave and be sure
allow not any of the d d crew to go near her only let her permit you
to receive her commands from time to time you have always been her
friend and advocate what would i now give had i permitted you to have
been a successful one 

let her have all her clothes and effects sent her instantly as a small
proof of my sincerity and force upon the dear creature who must be
moneyless what sums you can get her to take let me know how she has
been treated if roughly woe be to the guilty 

take thy watch in thy hand after thou hast freed her and d n the whole
brood dragon and serpents by the hour till thou'rt tired and tell
them i bid thee do so for their cursed officiousness 

they had nothing to do when they had found her but to wait my orders how
to proceed 

the great devil fly away with them all one by one through the roof of
their own cursed house and dash them to pieces against the tops of
chimneys as he flies and let the lesser devils collect the scattered
scraps and bag them up in order to put them together again in their
allotted place in the element of fire with cements of molten lead 

a line a line a kingdom for a line with tolerable news the first
moment thou canst write this fellow waits to bring it 



letter xiii

miss charlotte montague to miss howe
m hall tuesday afternoon 


dear miss howe 

your letter has infinitely disturbed us all 

this wretched man has been half distracted ever since saturday night 

we knew not what ailed him till your letter was brought 

vile wretch as he is he is however innocent of this new evil 

indeed he is he must be as i shall more at large acquaint you 

but will not now detain your messenger 

only to satisfy your just impatience by telling you that the dear young
lady is safe and we hope well 

a horrid mistake of his general orders has subjected her to the terror
and disgrace of an arrest 

poor dear miss harlowe her sufferings have endeared her to us almost
as much as her excellencies can have endeared her to you 

but she must now be quite at liberty 

he has been a distracted man ever since the news was brought him and we
knew not what ailed him 

but that i said before 

my lord m my lady sarah sadleir and my lady betty lawrance will all
write to you this very afternoon 

and so will the wretch himself 

and send it by a servant of their own not to detain your's 

i know not what i write 

but you shall have all the particulars just and true and fair from

dear madam 
your most faithful and obedient servant 
ch montague 



letter xiv

miss montague to miss howe
m hall july 18 


dear madam 

in pursuance of my promise i will minutely inform you of every thing we
know relating to this shocking transaction 

when we returned from you on thursday night and made our report of the
kind reception both we and our message met with in that you had been so
good as to promise to use your interest with your dear friend it put us
all into such good humour with one another and with my cousin lovelace 
that we resolved upon a little tour of two days the friday and saturday 
in order to give an airing to my lord and lady sarah both having been
long confined one by illness the other by melancholy my lord lady
sarah lady betty and myself were in the coach and all our talk was of
dear miss harlowe and of our future happiness with her mr lovelace and
my sister who is his favourite as he is her's were in his phaeton 
and whenever we joined company that was still the subject 

as to him never man praised woman as he did her never man gave greater
hopes and made better resolutions he is none of those that are
governed by interest he is too proud for that but most sincerely
delighted was he in talking of her and of his hopes of her returning
favour he said however more than once that he feared she would not
forgive him for from his heart he must say he deserved not her
forgiveness and often and often that there was not such a woman in the
world 

this i mention to show you madam that he could not at this time be
privy to such a barbarous and disgraceful treatment of her 

we returned not till saturday night all in as good humour with one
another as we went out we never had such pleasure in his company
before if he would be good and as he ought to be no man would be
better beloved by relations than he but never was there a greater
alteration in man when he came home and received a letter from a
messenger who it seems had been flattering himself in hopes of a
reward and had been waiting for his return from the night before in
such a fury the man fared but badly he instantly shut himself up to
write and ordered man and horse to be ready to set out before day-light
the next morning to carry the letter to a friend in london 

he would not see us all that night neither breakfast nor dine with us
next day he ought he said never to see the light and bid my sister 
whom he called an innocent and who was very desirous to know the
occasion of all this shun him saying he was a wretch and made so by
his own inventions and the consequences of them 

none of us could get out of him what so disturbed him we should too
soon hear he said to the utter dissipation of all his hopes and of all
ours 

we could easily suppose that all was not right with regard to the worthy
young lady and him 

he went out each day and said he wanted to run away from himself 

late on monday night he received a letter from mr belford his most
favoured friend by his own messenger who came back in a foam man and
horse whatever were the contents he was not easier but like a madman
rather but still would not let us know the occasion but to my sister
he said nobody my dear patsey who can think but of half the plagues
that pursue an intriguing spirit would ever quit the fore-right path 

he was out when your messenger came but soon came in and bad enough was
his reception from us all and he said that his own torments were
greater than ours than miss harlowe's or your's madam all put
together he would see your letter he always carries every thing
before him and said when he had read it that he thanked god he was
not such a villain as you with too great an appearance of reason 
thought him 

thus then he owned the matter to be 

he had left general instructions to the people of the lodgings the dear
lady went from to find out where she was gone to if possible that he
might have an opportunity to importune her to be his before their
difference was public the wicked people officious at least if not
wicked discovered where she was on wednesday and for fear she should
remove before they could have his orders they put her under a gentle
restraint as they call it and dispatched away a messenger to acquaint
him with it and to take his orders 

this messenger arrived friday afternoon and staid here till we returned
on saturday night and when he read the letter he brought i have told
you madam what a fury he was in 

the letter he retired to write and which he dispatched away so early on
sunday morning was to conjure his friend mr belford on receipt of it 
to fly to the lady and set her free and to order all her things to be
sent to her and to clear him of so black and villanous a fact as he
justly called it 

and by this time he doubts not that all is happily over and the beloved
of his soul as he calls her at ever word in an easier and happier way
than she was before the horrid fact and now he owns that the reason why
mr belford's letter set him into stronger ravings was because of his
keeping him wilfully and on purpose to torment him in suspense and
reflecting very heavily upon him for mr belford he says was ever the
lady's friend and advocate and only mentioning that he had waited upon
her referring to his next for further particulars which mr belford
could have told him at the time 

he declares and we can vouch for him that he has been ever since last
saturday night the most miserable of men 

he forbore going up himself that it might not be imagined he was guilty
of so black a contrivance and that he went up to complete any base views
in consequence of it 

believe us all dear miss howe under the deepest concern at this unhappy
accident which will we fear exasperate the charming sufferer not too
much for the occasion but too much for our hopes 

o what wretches are these free-living men who love to tread in intricate
paths and when once they err know not how far out of the way their
headstrong course may lead them 

my sister joins her thanks with mine to your good mother and self for
the favours you heaped upon us last thursday we beseech your continued
interest as to the subject of our visit it shall be all our studies to
oblige and recompense the dear lady to the utmost of our power and for
what she has suffered from the unhappy man 

we are dear madam 
your obliged and faithful servants 
charlotte montague 
martha 


 


dear miss howe 

we join in the above request of miss charlotte and miss patty montague 
for your favour and interest being convinced that the accident was an
accident and no plot or contrivance of a wretch too full of them we
are madam 

your most obedient humble servants 

m 
sarah sadleir 
eliz lawrance 


 


dear miss howe 

after what is written above by names and characters of unquestionable
honour i might have been excused signing a name almost as hateful to
myself as i know it is to you but the above will have it so since 
therefore i must write it shall be the truth which is that if i may
be once more admitted to pay my duty to the most deserving and most
injured of her sex i will be content to do it with a halter about my
neck and attended by a parson on my right hand and the hangman on my
left be doomed at her will either to the church or the gallows 

your most humble servant 
robert lovelace 

tuesday july 18 



letter xv

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
sunday night july 16 


what a cursed piece of work hast thou made of it with the most excellent
of women thou mayest be in earnest or in jest as thou wilt but the
poor lady will not be long either thy sport or the sport of fortune 

i will give thee an account of a scene that wants but her affecting pen
to represent it justly and it would wring all the black blood out of thy
callous heart 

thou only who art the author of her calamities shouldst have attended
her in her prison i am unequal to such a task nor know i any other man
but would 

this last act however unintended by thee yet a consequence of thy
general orders and too likely to be thought agreeable to thee by those
who know thy other villanies by her has finished thy barbarous work 
and i advise thee to trumpet forth every where how much in earnest thou
art to marry her whether true or not 

thou mayest safely do it she will not live to put thee to the trial 
and it will a little palliate for thy enormous usage of her and be a
mean to make mankind who know not what i know of the matter herd a
little longer with thee and forbear to hunt thee to thy fellow-savages
in the lybian wilds and desarts 

your messenger found me at edgware expecting to dinner with me several
friends whom i had invited three days before i sent apologies to them 
as in a case of life and death and speeded to town to the
woman's for how knew i but shocking attempts might be made upon her by
the cursed wretches perhaps by your connivance in order to mortify her
into your measures 

little knows the public what villanies are committed by vile wretches in
these abominable houses upon innocent creatures drawn into their snares 

finding the lady not there i posted away to the officer's although
sally told me that she had but just come from thence and that she had
refused to see her or as she sent down word any body else being
resolved to have the remainder of that sunday to herself as it might 
perhaps be the last she should ever see 

i had the same thing told me when i got thither 

i sent up to let her know that i came with a commission to set her at
liberty i was afraid of sending up the name of a man known to be your
friend she absolutely refused to see any man however for that day or
to answer further to any thing said from me 

having therefore informed myself of all that the officer and his wife 
and servant could acquaint me with as well in relation to the horrid
arrest as to her behaviour and the women's to her and her ill state of
health i went back to sinclair's as i will still call her and heard
the three women's story from all which i am enabled to give you the
following shocking particulars which may serve till i can see the
unhappy lady herself to-morrow if then i gain admittance to her you
will find that i have been very minute in my inquiries 

your villain it was that set the poor lady and had the impudence to
appear and abet the sheriff's officers in the cursed transaction he
thought no doubt that he was doing the most acceptable service to his
blessed master they had got a chair the head ready up as soon as
service was over and as she came out of the church at the door
fronting bedford-street the officers stepping up to her whispered that
they had an action against her 

she was terrified trembled and turned pale 

action said she what is that i have committed no bad action 
lord bless me men what mean you 

that you are our prisoner madam 

prisoner sirs what how why what have i done 

you must go with us be pleased madam to step into this chair 

with you with men must go with men i am not used to go with strange
men indeed you must excuse me 

we can't excuse you we are sheriff's officers we have a writ against
you you must go with us and you shall know at whose suit 

suit said the charming innocent i don't know what you mean pray men 
don't lay hands upon me they offering to put her into the chair i am
not used to be thus treated i have done nothing to deserve it 

she then spied thy villain o thou wretch said she where is thy vile
master am i again to be his prisoner help good people 

a crowd had begun to gather 

my master is in the country madam many miles off if you please to go
with these men they will treat you civilly 

the people were most of them struck with compassion a fine young
creature a thousand pities cried some while some few threw out vile
and shocking reflections but a gentleman interposed and demanded to
see the fellow's authority 

they showed it is your name clarissa harlowe madam said he 

yes yes indeed ready to sink my name was clarissa harlowe but it is
now wretchedness lord be merciful to me what is to come next 

you must go with these men madam said the gentleman they have
authority for what they do 

he pitied her and retired 

indeed you must said one chairman 

indeed you must said the other 

can nobody joined in another gentleman be applied to who will see that
so fine a creature is not ill used 

thy villain answered orders were given particularly for that she had
rich relations she need but ask and have she would only be carried to
the officer's house till matters could be made up the people she had
lodged with loved her but she had left her lodgings privately 

oh had she those tricks already cried one or two 

she heard not this but said well if i must go i must i cannot resist
 but i will not be carried to the woman's i will rather die at your
feet than be carried to the woman's 

you won't be carried there madam cried thy fellow 

only to my house madam said one of the officers 

where is that 

in high-holborn madam 

i know not where high-holborn is but any where except to the woman's 
 but am i to go with men only 

looking about her and seeing the three passages to wit that leading to
henrietta-street that to king-street and the fore-right one to
bedford-street crowded she started any where any where said she but
to the woman's and stepping into the chair threw herself on the seat 
in the utmost distress and confusion carry me carry me out of sight 
cover me cover me up for ever were her words 

thy villain drew the curtain she had not power and they went away with
her through a vast crowd of people 

here i must rest i can write no more at present 

only lovelace remember all this was to a clarissa 


 


the unhappy lady fainted away when she was taken out of the chair at the
officer's house 

several people followed the chair to the very house which is in a
wretched court sally was there and satisfied some of the inquirers 
that the young gentlewoman would be exceedingly well used and they soon
dispersed 

dorcas was also there but came not in her sight sally as a favour 
offered to carry her to her former lodgings but she declared they should
carry her thither a corpse if they did 

very gentle usage the women boast of so would a vulture could it speak 
with the entrails of its prey upon its rapacious talons of this you'll
judge from what i have to recite 

she asked what was meant by this usage of her people told me said
she that i must go with the men that they had authority to take me so
i submitted but now what is to be the end of this disgraceful
violence 

the end said the vile sally martin is for honest people to come at
their own 

bless me have i taken away any thing that belongs to those who have
obtained the power over me i have left very valuable things behind me 
but have taken away that is not my own 

and who do you think miss harlowe for i understand said the cursed
creature you are not married who do you think is to pay for your board
and your lodgings such handsome lodgings for so long a time as you were
at mrs sinclair's 

lord have mercy upon me miss martin i think you are miss martin 
and is this the cause of such a disgraceful insult upon me in the open
streets 

and cause enough miss harlowe fond of gratifying her jealous revenge 
by calling her miss one hundred and fifty guineas or pounds is no
small sum to lose and by a young creature who would have bilked her
lodgings 

you amaze me miss martin what language do you talk in bilk my
lodgings what is that 

she stood astonished and silent for a few moments 

but recovering herself and turning from her to the window she wrung her
hands  the cursed sally showed me how   and lifting them up now 
lovelace now indeed do i think i ought to forgive thee but who shall
forgive clarissa harlowe o my sister o my brother tender mercies
were your cruelties to this 

after a pause her handkerchief drying up her falling tears she turned
to sally now have i noting to do but acquiesce only let me say that
if this aunt of your's this mrs sinclair or this man this mr 
lovelace come near me or if i am carried to the horrid house for
that i suppose is the design of this new outrage god be merciful to
the poor clarissa harlowe look to the consequence look i charge
you to the consequence 

the vile wretch told her it was not designed to carry her any where
against her will but if it were they should take care not to be
frighted again by a penknife 

she cast up her eyes to heaven and was silent and went to the farthest
corner of the room and sitting down threw her handkerchief over her
face 

sally asked her several questions but not answering her she told her 
she would wait upon her by-and-by when she had found her speech 

she ordered the people to press her to eat and drink she must be
fasting nothing but her prayers and tears poor thing were the
merciless devil's words as she owned to me dost think i did not curse
her 

she went away and after her own dinner returned 

the unhappy lady by this devil's account of her then seemed either
mortified into meekness or to have made a resolution not to be provoked
by the insults of this cursed creature 

sally inquired in her presence whether she had eat or drank any thing 
and being told by the woman that she could not prevail upon her to taste
a morsel or drink a drop she said this is wrong miss harlowe very
wrong your religion i think should teach you that starving yourself
is self-murder 

she answered not 

the wretch owned she was resolved to make her speak 

she asked if mabell should attend her till it were seen what her friends
would do for her in discharge of the debt mabell said she had not yet
earned the clothes you were so good as to give her 

am i not worthy an answer miss harlowe 

i would answer you said the sweet sufferer without any emotion if i
knew how 

i have ordered pen ink and paper to be brought you miss harlowe 
there they are i know you love writing you may write to whom you
please your friend miss howe will expect to hear from you 

i have no friend said she i deserve none 

rowland for that's the officer's name told her she had friends enow to
pay the debt if she would write 

she would trouble nobody she had no friends was all they could get from
her while sally staid but yet spoken with a patience of spirit as if
she enjoyed her griefs 

the insolent creature went away ordering them in the lady's hearing to
be very civil to her and to let her want for nothing now had she she
owned the triumph of her heart over this haughty beauty who kept them
all at such a distance in their own house 

what thinkest thou lovelace of this this wretch's triumph was over a
clarissa 

about six in the evening rowland's wife pressed her to drink tea she
said she had rather have a glass of water for her tongue was ready to
cleave to the roof of her mouth 

the woman brought her a glass and some bread and butter she tried to
taste the latter but could not swallow it but eagerly drank the water 
lifting up her eyes in thankfulness for that 

the divine clarissa lovelace reduced to rejoice for a cup of cold
water by whom reduced 

about nine o'clock she asked if any body were to be her bedfellow 

their maid if she pleased or as she was so weak and ill the girl
should sit up with her if she chose she should 

she chose to be alone both night and day she said but might she not be
trusted with the key of the room where she was to lie down for she
should not put off her clothes 

that they told her could not be 

she was afraid not she said but indeed she would not get away if she
could 

they told me that they had but one bed besides that they lay in
themselves which they would fain have had her accept of and besides
that their maid lay in in a garret which they called a hole of a
garret and that that one bed was the prisoner's bed which they made
several apologies to me about i suppose it is shocking enough 

but the lady would not lie in theirs was she not a prisoner she said
 let her have the prisoner's room 

yet they owned that she started when she was conducted thither but
recovering herself very well said she why should not all be of a
piece why should not my wretchedness be complete 

she found fault that all the fastenings were on the outside and none
within and said she could not trust herself in a room where others
could come in at their pleasure and she not go out she had not been
used to it 

dear dear soul my tears flow as i write indeed lovelace she had
not been used to such treatment 

they assured her that it was as much their duty to protect her from
other persons' insults as from escaping herself 

then they were people of more honour she said than she had been of late
used to 

she asked if they knew mr lovelace 

no was their answer 

have you heard of him 

no 

well then you may be good sort of folks in your way 

pause here for a moment lovelace and reflect i must 


 


again they asked her if they should send any word to her lodgings 

these are my lodgings now are they not was all her answer 

she sat up in a chair all night the back against the door having it
seems thrust a piece of a poker through the staples where a bolt had
been on the inside 


 


next morning sally and polly both went to visit her 

she had begged of sally the day before that she might not see mrs 
sinclair nor dorcas nor the broken-toothed servant called william 

polly would have ingratiated herself with her and pretended to be
concerned for her misfortunes but she took no more notice of her than
of the other 

they asked if she had any commands if she had she only need to mention
what they were and she should be obeyed 

none at all she said 

how did she like the people of the house were they civil to her 

pretty well considering she had no money to give them 

would she accept of any money they could put it to her account 

she would contract no debts 

had she any money about her 

she meekly put her hand in her pocket and pulled out half a guinea and
a little silver yes i have a little but here should be fees paid 
i believe should there not i have heard of entrance-money to compound
for not being stript but these people are very civil people i fancy 
for they have not offered to take away my clothes 

they have orders to be civil to you 

it is very kind 

but we two will bail you miss if you will go back with us to mrs 
sinclair's 

not for the world 

her's are very handsome apartments 

the fitter for those who own them 

these are very sad ones 

the fitter for me 

you may be happy yet miss if you will 

i hope i shall 

if you refuse to eat or drink we will give bail and take you with us 

then i will try to eat and drink any thing but go with you 

will you not send to your new lodgings the people will be frighted 

so they will if i send so they will if they know where i am 

but have you no things to send for from thence 

there is what will pay for their lodgings and trouble i shall not lessen
their security 

but perhaps letters or messages may be left for you there 

i have very few friends and to those i have i will spare the
mortification of knowing what has befallen me 

we are surprised at your indifference miss harlowe will you not write
to any of your friends 

no 

why you don't think of tarrying here always 

i shall not live always 

do you think you are to stay here as long as you live 

that's as it shall please god and those who have brought me hither 

should you like to be at liberty 

i am miserable what is liberty to the miserable but to be more
miserable 

how miserable miss you may make yourself as happy as you please 

i hope you are both happy 

we are 

may you be more and more happy 

but we wish you to be so too 

i shall never be of your opinion i believe as to what happiness is 

what do you take our opinion of happiness to be 

to live at mrs sinclair's 

perhaps said sally we were once as squeamish and narrow-minded as you 

how came it over with you 

because we saw the ridiculousness of prudery 

do you come hither to persuade me to hate prudery as you call it as
much as you do 

we came to offer our service to you 

it is out of your power to serve me 

perhaps not 

it is not in my inclination to trouble you 

you may be worse offered 

perhaps i may 

you are mighty short miss 

as i wish your visit to be ladies 

they owned to me that they cracked their fans and laughed 

adieu perverse beauty 

your servant ladies 

adieu haughty airs 

you see me humbled 

as you deserve miss harlowe pride will have a fall 

better fall with what you call pride than stand with meanness 

who does 

i had once a better opinion of you miss horton indeed you should not
insult the miserable 

neither should the miserable said sally insult people for their
civility 

i should be sorry if i did 

mrs sinclair shall attend you by-and-by to know if you have any
commands for her 

i have no wish for any liberty but that of refusing to see her and one
more person 

what we came for was to know if you had any proposals to make for your
enlargement 

then it seems the officer put in you have very good friends madam 
i understand is it not better that you make it up charges will run
high a hundred and fifty guineas are easier paid than two hundred let
these ladies bail you and go along with them or write to your friends
to make it up 

sally said there is a gentleman who saw you taken and was so much moved
for you miss harlowe that he would gladly advance the money for you 
and leave you to pay it when you can 

see lovelace what cursed devils these are this is the way we know 
that many an innocent heart is thrown upon keeping and then upon the
town but for these wretches thus to go to work with such an angel as
this how glad would have been the devilish sally to have had the least
handle to report to thee a listening ear or patient spirit upon this
hint 

sir said she with high indignation to the officer did not you say 
last night that it was as much your business to protect me from the
insults of others as from escaping cannot i be permitted to see whom
i please and to refuse admittance to those i like not 

your creditors madam will expect to see you 

not if i declare i will not treat with them 

then madam you will be sent to prison 

prison friend what dost thou call thy house 

not a prison madam 

why these iron-barred windows then why these double locks and bolts
all on the outside none on the in 

and down she dropt into her chair and they could not get another word
from her she threw her handkerchief over her face as one before which
was soon wet with tears and grievously they own she sobbed 

gentle treatment lovelace perhaps thou as well as these wretches 
will think it so 

sally then ordered a dinner and said they would soon be back a gain 
and see that she eat and drank as a good christian should comporting
herself to her condition and making the best of it 

what has not this charming creature suffered what has she not gone
through in these last three months that i know of who would think
such a delicately-framed person could have sustained what she has
sustained we sometimes talk of bravery of courage of fortitude here
they are in perfection such bravoes as thou and i should never have
been able to support ourselves under half the persecutions the
disappointments and contumelies that she has met with but like
cowards should have slid out of the world basely by some back-door 
that is to say by a sword by a pistol by a halter or knife but here
is a fine-principled woman who by dint of this noble consideration as
i imagine  what else can support her   that she has not deserved the
evils she contends with and that this world is designed but as a
transitory state of the probation and that she is travelling to another
and better puts up with all the hardships of the journey and is not to
be diverted from her course by the attacks of thieves and robbers or any
other terrors and difficulties being assured of an ample reward at the
end of it 

if thou thinkest this reflection uncharacteristic from a companion and
friend of thine imaginest thou that i profited nothing by my long
attendance on my uncle in his dying state and from the pious reflections
of the good clergyman who day by day at the poor man's own request 
visited and prayed by him and could i have another such instance as
this to bring all these reflections home to me 

then who can write of good persons and of good subjects and be capable
of admiring them and not be made serious for the time and hence may we
gather what a benefit to the morals of men the keeping of good company
must be while those who keep only bad must necessarily more and more
harden and be hardened 


 


tis twelve of the clock sunday night i can think of nothing but this
excellent creature her distresses fill my head and my heart i was
drowsy for a quarter of an hour but the fit is gone off and i will
continue the melancholy subject from the information of these wretches 
enough i dare say will arise in the visit i shall make if admitted
to-morrow to send by thy servant as to the way i am likely to find her
in 

after the women had left her she complained of her head and her heart 
and seemed terrified with apprehensions of being carried once more to
sinclair's 

refusing any thing for breakfast mrs rowland came up to her and told
her as these wretches owned they had ordered her for fear she should
starve herself that she must and should have tea and bread and butter 
and that as she had friends who could support her if she wrote to them 
it was a wrong thing both for herself and them to starve herself thus 

if it be for your own sakes said she that is another thing let coffee 
or tea or chocolate or what you will be got and put down a chicken to
my account every day if you please and eat it yourselves i will taste
it if i can i would do nothing to hinder you i have friends will pay
you liberally when they know i am gone 

they wondered they told her at her strange composure in such
distresses 

they were nothing she said to what she had suffered already from the
vilest of all men the disgrace of seizing her in the street multitudes
of people about her shocking imputations wounding her ears had indeed
been very affecting to her but that was over every thing soon would 
 and she should be still more composed were it not for the
apprehensions of seeing one man and one woman and being tricked or
forced back to the vilest house in the world 

then were it not better to give way to the two gentlewoman's offer to
bail her they could tell her it was a very kind proffer and what was
not to be met every day 

she believed so 

the ladies might possibly dispense with her going back to the house to
which she had such an antipathy then the compassionate gentleman who
was inclined to make it up with her creditors on her own bond it was
very strange to them she hearkened not to so generous a proposal 

did the two ladies tell you who the gentleman was or did they say any
more on the subject 

yes they did and hinted to me said the woman that you had nothing to
do but to receive a visit from the gentleman and the money they
believed would be laid down on your own bond or note 

she was startled 

i charge you said she as you will answer it one day to my friends i
charge you don't if you do you know not what may be the consequence 

they apprehended no bad consequence they said in doing their duty and
if she knew not her own good her friends would thank them for taking any
innocent steps to serve her though against her will 

don't push me upon extremities man don't make me desperate woman i
have no small difficulty notwithstanding the seeming composure you just
now took notice of to bear as i ought to bear the evils i suffer but
if you bring a man or men to me be the pretence what it will 

she stopt there and looked so earnestly and so wildly they said that
they did not know but she would do some harm to herself if they
disobeyed her and that would be a sad thing in their house and might be
their ruin they therefore promised that no man should be brought to
her but by her own consent 

mrs rowland prevailed on her to drink a dish of tea and taste some
bread and butter about eleven on saturday morning which she probably
did to have an excuse not to dine with the women when they returned 

but she would not quit her prison-room as she called it to go into
their parlour 

unbarred windows and a lightsomer apartment  she said had too
cheerful an appearance for her mind 

a shower falling as she spoke what  said she looking up do the
elements weep for me 

at another time the light of the sun was irksome to her the sun
seemed to shine in to mock her woes 

methought  added she the sun darting in and gilding these iron bars 
plays upon me like the two women who came to insult my haggard looks by
the word beauty and my dejected heart by the word haughty airs 

sally came again at dinner-time to see how she fared as she told her 
and that she did not starve herself and as she wanted to have some talk
with her if she gave her leave she would dine with her 

i cannot eat 

you must try miss harlowe 

and dinner being ready just then she offered her hand and desired her
to walk down 

no she would not stir out of her prison-room 

these sullen airs won't do miss harlowe indeed they won't 

she was silent 

you will have harder usage than any you have ever yet known i can tell
you if you come not into some humour to make matters up 

she was still silent 

come miss walk down to dinner let me entreat you do miss horton is
below she was once your favourite 

she waited for an answer but received none 

we came to make some proposals to you for your good though you
affronted us so lately and we would not let mrs sinclair come in
person because we thought to oblige you 

this is indeed obliging 

come give me your hand miss harlowe you are obliged to me i can tell
you that and let us go down to miss horton 

excuse me i will not stir out of this room 

would you have me and miss horton dine in this filthy bed-room 

it is not a bed-room to me i have not been in bed nor will while i am
here 

and yet you care not as i see to leave the house and so you won't go
down miss harlowe 

i won't except i am forced to it 

well well let it alone i sha'n't ask miss horton to dine in this
room i assure you i will send up a plate 

and away the little saucy toad fluttered down 

when they had dined up they came together 

well miss you would not eat any thing it seems very pretty sullen
airs these no wonder the honest gentleman had such a hand with you 

she only held up her hands and eyes the tears trickling down her cheeks 

insolent devils how much more cruel and insulting are bad women even
than bad men 

methinks miss said sally you are a little soily to what we have seen
you pity such a nice lady should not have changes of apparel why
won't you send to your lodgings for linen at least 

i am not nice now 

miss looks well and clean in any thing said polly but dear madam why
won't you send to your lodgings were it but in kindness to the people 
they must have a concern about you and your miss howe will wonder
what's become of you for no doubt you correspond 

she turned from them and to herself said too much too much she
tossed her handkerchief wet before with her tears from her and held
her apron to her eyes 

don't weep miss said the vile polly 

yet do cried the viler sally it will be a relief nothing as mr 
lovelace once told me dries sooner than tears for once i too wept
mightily 

i could not bear the recital of this with patience yet i cursed them
not so much as i should have done had i not had a mind to get from them
all the particulars of their gentle treatment and this for two reasons 
the one that i might stab thee to the heart with the repetition and the
other that i might know upon what terms i am likely to see the unhappy
lady to-morrow 

well but miss harlowe cried sally do you think these forlorn airs
pretty you are a good christian child mrs rowland tells me she has
got you a bible-book o there it lies i make no doubt but you have
doubled down the useful places as honest matt prior says 

then rising and taking it up ay so you have the book of job one
opens naturally here i see my mamma made me a fine bible-scholar you
see miss horton i know something of the book 

they proposed once more to bail her and to go home with them a motion
which she received with the same indignation as before 

sally told her that she had written in a very favourable manner in her
behalf to you and that she every hour expected an answer and made no
doubt that you would come up with a messenger and generously pay the
whole debt and ask her pardon for neglecting it 

this disturbed her so much that they feared she would have fallen into
fits she could not bear your name she said she hoped she should
never see you more and were you to intrude yourself dreadful
consequences might follow 

surely they said she would be glad to be released from her confinement 

indeed she should now they had begun to alarm her with his name who was
the author of all her woes and who she now saw plainly gave way to
this new outrage in order to bring her to his own infamous terms 

why then they asked would she not write to her friends to pay mrs 
sinclair's demand 

because she hoped she should not trouble any body and because she knew
that the payment of the money if she should be able to pay it was not
what was aimed at 

sally owned that she told her that truly she had thought herself as
well descended and as well educated as herself though not entitled to
such considerable fortunes and had the impudence to insist upon it to
me to be truth 

she had the insolence to add to the lady that she had as much reason as
she to expect mr lovelace would marry her he having contracted to do so
before he knew miss clarissa harlowe and that she had it under his hand
and seal too or else he had not obtained his end therefore it was not
likely she should be so officious as to do his work against herself if
she thought mr lovelace had designs upon her like what she presumed to
hint at that for her part her only view was to procure liberty to a
young gentlewoman who made those things grievous to her which would not
be made such a rout about by any body else and to procure the payment of
a just debt to her friend mrs sinclair 

she besought them to leave her she wanted not these instances she
said to convince her of the company she was in and told them that to
get rid of such visiters and of the still worse she was apprehensive of 
she would write to one friend to raise the money for her though it would
be death for her to do so because that friend could not do it without
her mother in whose eye it would give a selfish appearance to a
friendship that was above all sordid alloys 

they advised her to write out of hand 

but how much must i write for what is the sum should i not have had a
bill delivered me god knows i took not your lodgings but he that
could treat me as he has done could do this 

don't speak against mr lovelace miss harlowe he is a man i greatly
esteem  cursed toad   and bating that he will take his advantage 
where he can of us silly credulous women he is a man of honour 

she lifted up her hands and eyes instead of speaking and well she
might for any words she could have used could not have expressed the
anguish she must feel on being comprehended in the us 

she must write for one hundred and fifty guineas at least two hundred 
if she were short of more money might well be written for 

mrs sinclair she said had all her clothes let them be sold fairly
sold and the money go as far as it would go she had also a few other
valuables but no money none at all but the poor half guinea and the
little silver they had seen she would give bond to pay all that her
apparel and the other maters she had would fall short of she had
great effects belonging to her of right her bond would and must be
paid were it for a thousand pounds but her clothes she should never
want she believed if not too much undervalued those and her few
valuables would answer every thing she wished for no surplus but to
discharge the last expenses and forty shillings would do as well for
those as forty pounds let my ruin said she lifting up her eyes be
large let it be complete in this life for a composition let it be
complete  and there she stopped 

the wretches could not help wishing to me for the opportunity of making
such a purchase for their own wear how i cursed them and in my heart 
thee but too probable thought i that this vile sally martin may hope 
 though thou art incapable of it   that her lovelace as she has the
assurance behind thy back to call thee may present her with some of
the poor lady's spoils 

will not mrs sinclair proceeded she think my clothes a security till
they can be sold they are very good clothes a suit or two but just
put on as it were never worn they cost much more than it demanded of
me my father loved to see me fine all shall go but let me have the
particulars of her demand i suppose i must pay for my destroyer  that
was her well-adapted word   and his servants as well as for myself i
am content to do so i am above wishing that any body who could thus
act should be so much as expostulated with as to the justice and equity
of this payment if i have but enough to pay the demand i shall be
satisfied and will leave the baseness of such an action as this as ana
aggravation of a guilt which i thought could not be aggravated 

i own lovelace i have malice in this particularity in order to sting
thee on the heart and let me ask thee what now thou can'st think of
thy barbarity thy unprecedented barbarity in having reduced a person of
her rank fortune talents and virtue so low 

the wretched women it must be owned act but in their profession a
profession thou hast been the principal means of reducing these two to
act in and they know what thy designs have been and how far
prosecuted it is in their opinions using her gently that they have
forborne to bring her to the woman so justly odious to her and that they
have not threatened her with the introducing to her strange men nor yet
brought into her company their spirit-breakers and humbling-drones 
 fellows not allowed to carry stings to trace and force her back to
their detested house and when there into all their measures 

till i came they thought thou wouldst not be displeased at any thing she
suffered that could help to mortify her into a state of shame and
disgrace and bring her to comply with thy views when thou shouldst come
to release her from these wretches as from a greater evil than
cohabiting with thee 

when thou considerest these things thou wilt make no difficulty of
believing that this their own account of their behaviour to this
admirable woman has been far short of their insults and the less when i
tell thee that all together their usage had such effect upon her that
they left her in violent hysterics ordering an apothecary to be sent
for if she should continue in them and be worse and particularly as
they had done from the first that they kept out of her way any edged or
pointed instrument especially a pen-knife which pretending to mend a
pen they said she might ask for 

at twelve saturday night rowland sent to tell them that she was so
ill that he knew not what might be the issue and wished her out of his
house 

and this made them as heartily wish to hear from you for their
messenger to their great surprise was not then returned from m hall 
and they were sure he must have reached that place by friday night 

early on sunday morning both devils went to see how she did they had
such an account of her weakness lowness and anguish that they forebore
 out of compassion they said finding their visits so disagreeable to
her to see her but their apprehension of what might be the issue was 
no doubt their principal consideration nothing else could have softened
such flinty bosoms 

they sent for the apothecary rowland had had to her and gave him and
rowland and his wife and maid strict orders many times repeated for
the utmost care to be taken of her no doubt with an old-bailey
forecast and they sent up to let her know what orders they had given 
but that understanding she had taken something to compose herself they
would not disturb her 

she had scrupled it seems to admit the apothecary's visit over night 
because he was a man nor could she be prevailed upon to see him till
they pleaded their own safety to her 

they went again from church  lord bob these creatures go to church  
but she sent them down word that she must have all the remainder of the
day to herself 

when i first came and told them of thy execrations for what they had
done and joined my own to them they were astonished the mother said 
she had thought she had known mr lovelace better and expected thanks 
and not curses 

while i was with them came back halting and cursing most horribly 
their messenger by reason of the ill-usage he had received from you 
instead of the reward he had been taught to expect for the supposed good
news that he carried down a pretty fellow art thou not to abuse
people for the consequences of thy own faults 

dorcas whose acquaintance this fellow is and who recommended him for
the journey had conditioned with him it seems for a share in the
expected bounty from you had she been to have had her share made good 
i wish thou hadst broken every bone in his skin 

under what shocking disadvantages and with this addition to them that i
am thy friend and intimate am i to make a visit to this unhappy lady
to-morrow morning in thy name too enough to be refused that i am of
a sex to which for thy sake she has so justifiable an aversion nor 
having such a tyrant of a father and such an implacable brother has she
the reason to make an exception in favour of any of it on their accounts 

it is three o'clock i will close here and take a little rest what i
have written will be a proper preparative for what shall offer by-and-by 

thy servant is not to return without a letter he tells me and that thou
expectest him back in the morning thou hast fellows enough where thou
art at thy command if i find any difficulty in seeing the lady thy
messenger shall post away with this let him look to broken bones and
other consequences if what he carries answer not thy expectation but 
if i am admitted thou shalt have this and the result of my audience both
together in the former case thou mayest send another servant to wait
the next advices from

j belford 



letter xvi

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
monday july 17 


about six this morning i went to rowland's mrs sinclair was to follow
me in order to dismiss the action but not to come in sight 

rowland upon inquiry told me that the lady was extremely ill and that
she had desired that no one but his wife or maid should come near her 

i said i must see her i had told him my business over-night and i
must see her 

his wife went up but returned presently saying she could not get her
to speak to her yet that her eyelids moved though she either would not 
or could not open them to look up at her 

oons woman said i the lady may be in a fit the lady may be dying let
me go up show me the way 

a horrid hole of a house in an alley they call a court stairs
wretchedly narrow even to the first-floor rooms and into a den they led
me with broken walls which had been papered as i saw by a multitude of
tacks and some torn bits held on by the rusty heads 

the floor indeed was clean but the ceiling was smoked with variety of
figures and initials of names that had been the woeful employment of
wretches who had no other way to amuse themselves 

a bed at one corner with coarse curtains tacked up at the feet to the
ceiling because the curtain-rings were broken off but a coverlid upon
it with a cleanish look though plaguily in tatters and the corners tied
up in tassels that the rents in it might go no farther 

the windows dark and double-barred the tops boarded up to save mending 
and only a little four-paned eyelet-hole of a casement to let in air 
more however coming in at broken panes than could come in at that 

four old turkey-worked chairs bursten-bottomed the stuffing staring
out 

an old tottering worm-eaten table that had more nails bestowed in
mending it to make it stand than the table cost fifty years ago when
new 

on the mantle-piece was an iron shove-up candlestick with a lighted
candle in it twinkle twinkle twinkle four of them i suppose for a
penny 

near that on the same shelf was an old looking-glass cracked through
the middle breaking out into a thousand points the crack given it 
perhaps in a rage by some poor creature to whom it gave the
representation of his heart's woes in his face 

the chimney had two half-tiles in it on one side and one whole one on
the other which showed it had been in better plight but now the very
mortar had followed the rest of the tiles in every other place and left
the bricks bare 

an old half-barred stove grate was in the chimney and in that a large
stone-bottle without a neck filled with baleful yew as an evergreen 
withered southern-wood dead sweet-briar and sprigs of rue in flower 

to finish the shocking description in a dark nook stood an old
broken-bottomed cane couch without a squab or coverlid sunk at one
corner and unmortised by the failing of one of its worm-eater legs 
which lay in two pieces under the wretched piece of furniture it could
no longer support 

and this thou horrid lovelace was the bed-chamber of the divine
clarissa 

i had leisure to cast my eye on these things for going up softly the
poor lady turned not about at our entrance nor till i spoke moved her
head 

she was kneeling in a corner of the room near the dismal window against
the table on an old bolster as it seemed to be of the cane couch 
half-covered with her handkerchief her back to the door which was only
shut to  no need of fastenings   her arms crossed upon the table the
fore-finger of her right-hand in her bible she had perhaps been reading
in it and could read no longer paper pens ink lay by her book on
the table her dress was white damask exceeding neat but her stays
seemed not tight-laced i was told afterwards that her laces had been
cut when she fainted away at her entrance into this cursed place and
she had not been solicitous enough about her dress to send for others 
her head-dress was a little discomposed her charming hair in natural
ringlets as you have heretofore described it but a little tangled as
if not lately combed irregularly shading one side of the loveliest neck
in the world as her disordered rumpled handkerchief did the other her
face  o how altered from what i had seen it yet lovely in spite of all
her griefs and sufferings   was reclined when we entered upon her
crossed arms but so as not more than one side of it could be hid 

when i surveyed the room around and the kneeling lady sunk with majesty
too in her white flowing robes for she had not on a hoop spreading
the dark though not dirty floor and illuminating that horrid corner 
her linen beyond imagination white considering that she had not been
undressed every since she had been here i thought my concern would have
choked me something rose in my throat i know not what which made me 
for a moment guggle as it were for speech which at last forcing its
way con con confound you both said i to the man and woman is this
an apartment for such a lady and could the cursed devils of her own sex 
who visited this suffering angel see her and leave her in so d d a
nook 

sir we would have had the lady to accept of our own bed-chamber but she
refused it we are poor people and we expect nobody will stay with us
longer than they can help it 

you are people chosen purposely i doubt not by the d d woman who has
employed you and if your usage of this lady has been but half as bad as
your house you had better never to have seen the light 

up then raised the charming sufferer her lovely face but with such a
significance of woe overspreading it that i could not for the soul of
me help being visibly affected 

she waved her hand two or three times towards the door as if commanding
me to withdraw and displeased at my intrusion but did not speak 

permit me madam i will not approach one step farther without your leave
 permit me for one moment the favour of your ear 

no no go go man with an emphasis and would have said more but as
if struggling in vain for words she seemed to give up speech for lost 
and dropped her head down once more with a deep sigh upon her left arm 
her right as if she had not the use of it numbed i suppose 
self-moved dropping on her side 

o that thou hadst been there and in my place but by what i then felt 
in myself i am convinced that a capacity of being moved by the
distresses of our fellow creatures is far from being disgraceful to a
manly heart with what pleasure at that moment could i have given up
my own life could i but first have avenged this charming creature and
cut the throat of her destroyer as she emphatically calls thee though
the friend that i best love and yet at the same time my heart and my
eyes gave way to a softness of which though not so hardened a wretch as
thou they were never before so susceptible 

i dare not approach you dearest lady without your leave but on my
knees i beseech you to permit me to release you from this d d house 
and out of the power of the cursed woman who was the occasion of your
being here 

she lifted up her sweet face once more and beheld me on my knees never
knew i before what it was to pray so heartily 

are you not are you not mr belford sir i think your name is belford 

it is madam and i ever was a worshipper of your virtues and an
advocate for you and i come to release you from the hands you are in 

and in whose to place me o leave me leave me let me never rise from
this spot let me never never more believe in man 

this moment dearest lady this very moment if you please you may
depart whithersoever you think fit you are absolutely free and your
own mistress 

i had now as lieve die here in this place as any where i will owe no
obligation to any friend of him in whose company you have seen me so 
pray sir withdraw 

then turning to the officer mr rowland i think your name is i am
better reconciled to your house than i was at first if you can but
engage that i shall have nobody come near me but your wife no man 
and neither of those women who have sported with my calamities i will
die with you and in this very corner and you shall be well satisfied
for the trouble you have had with me i have value enough for that for 
see i have a diamond ring taking it out of her bosom and i have
friends will redeem it at a high price when i am gone 

but for you sir looking at me i beg you to withdraw if you mean well
by me god i hope will reward you for your good meaning but to the
friend of my destroyer will i not owe an obligation 

you will owe no obligation to me nor to any body you have been
detained for a debt you do not owe the action is dismissed and you
will only be so good as to give me your hand into the coach which stands
as near to this house as it could draw up and i will either leave you
at the coach-door or attend you whithersoever you please till i see you
safe where you would wish to be 

will you then sir compel me to be beholden to you 

you will inexpressibly oblige me madam to command me to do you either
service or pleasure 

why then sir  looking at me  but why do you mock me in that humble
posture rise sir i cannot speak to you else 

i rose 

only sir take this ring i have a sister who will be glad to have it 
at the price it shall be valued at for the former owner's sake out of
the money she gives let this man be paid handsomely paid and i have a
few valuables more at my lodging dorcas or the man william can tell
where that is let them and my clothes at the wicked woman's where you
have seen me be sold for the payment of my lodging first and next of
your friend's debts that i have been arrested for as far as they will
go only reserving enough to put me into the ground any where or any
how no matter tell your friend i wish it may be enough to satisfy
the whole demand but if it be not he must make it up himself or if he
think fit to draw for it on miss howe she will repay it and with
interest if he insist upon it and this sir if you promise to
perform you will do me as you offer both pleasure and service and say
you will and take the ring and withdraw if i want to say any thing
more to you you seem to be an humane man i will let you know and so 
sir god bless you 

i approached her and was going to speak 

don't speak sir here's the ring 

i stood off 

and won't you take it won't you do this last office for me i have no
other person to ask it of else believe me i would not request it of
you but take it or not laying it upon the table you must withdraw 
sir i am very ill i would fain get a little rest if i could i find
i am going to be bad again 

and offering to rise she sunk down through excess of weakness and grief 
in a fainting fit 

why lovelace was thou not present thyself why dost thou commit such
villanies as even thou art afraid to appear in and yet puttest a weaker
heart and head upon encountering with them 

the maid coming in just then the woman and she lifted her up on a
decrepit couch and i withdrew with this rowland who wept like a child 
and said he never in his life was so moved 

yet so hardened a wretch art thou that i question whether thou wilt shed
a tear at my relation 

they recovered her by hartshorn and water i went down mean while for
the detestable woman had been below some time o how i did curse her i
never before was so fluent in curses 

she tried to wheedle me but i renounced her and after she had
dismissed the action sent her away crying or pretending to cry because
of my behaviour to her 

you will observe that i did not mention one word to the lady about you 
i was afraid to do it for twas plain that she could not bear your
name your friend and the company you have seen me in were the words
nearest to naming you she could speak and yet i wanted to clear your
intention of this brutal this sordid-looking villany 

i sent up again by rowland's wife when i heard that the lady was
recovered beseeching her to quit that devilish place and the woman
assured her that she was at liberty to do so for that the action was
dismissed 

but she cared not to answer her and was so weak and low that it was
almost as much out of her power as inclination the woman told me to
speak 

i would have hastened away for my friend doctor h but the house is such
a den and the room she was in such a hole that i was ashamed to be seen
in it by a man of his reputation especially with a woman of such an
appearance and in such uncommon distress and i found there was no
prevailing upon her to quit it for the people's bed-room which was neat
and lightsome 

the strong room she was in the wretches told me should have been in
better order but that it was but the very morning that she was brought
in that an unhappy man had quitted it for a more eligible prison no
doubt since there could hardly be a worse 

being told that she desired not to be disturbed and seemed inclined to
doze i took this opportunity to go to her lodgings in covent-garden to
which dorcas who first discovered her there as will was the setter
from church had before given me a direction 

the man's name is smith a dealer in gloves snuff and such petty
merchandize his wife the shopkeeper he a maker of the gloves they sell 
honest people it seems 

i thought to have got the woman with me to the lady but she was not
within 

i talked with the man and told him what had befallen the lady owing as
i said to a mistake of orders and gave her the character she deserved 
and desired him to send his wife the moment she came in to the lady 
directing him whither not doubting that her attendance would be very
welcome to her which he promised 

he told me that a letter was left for her there on saturday and about
half an hour before i came another superscribed by the same hand the
first by the post the other by a countryman who having been informed
of her absence and of all the circumstances they could tell him of it 
posted away full of concern saying that the lady he was sent from
would be ready to break her heart at the tidings 

i thought it right to take the two letters back with me and dismissing
my coach took a chair as a more proper vehicle for the lady if i the
friend of her destroyer could prevail upon her to leave rowland's 

and here being obliged to give way to an indispensable avocation i will
make thee taste a little in thy turn of the plague of suspense and
break off without giving thee the least hint of the issue of my further
proceedings i know that those least bear disappointment who love most
to give it in twenty instances hast thou afforded me proof of the
truth of this observation and i matter not thy raving 

another letter however shall be ready send for it a soon as thou wilt 
but were it not have i not written enough to convince thee that i am

thy ready and obliging friend 
j belford 



letter xvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday july 17 eleven at night 


curse upon thy hard heart thou vile caitiff how hast thou tortured me 
by thy designed abruption tis impossible that miss harlowe should have
ever suffered as thou hast made me suffer and as i now suffer 

that sex is made to bear pain it is a curse that the first of it
entailed upon all her daughters when she brought the curse upon us all 
and they love those best whether man or child who give them most but
to stretch upon thy d d tenter-hooks such a spirit as mine no rack 
no torture can equal my torture 

and must i still wait the return of another messenger 

confound thee for a malicious devil i wish thou wert a post-horse and
i upon the back of thee how would i whip and spur and harrow up thy
clumsy sides till i make thee a ready-roasted ready-flayed mess of
dog's meat all the hounds in the country howling after thee as i drove
thee to wait my dismounting in order to devour thee piece-meal life
still throbbing in each churned mouthful 

give this fellow the sequel of thy tormenting scribble 

dispatch him away with it thou hast promised it shall be ready every
cushion or chair i shall sit upon the bed i shall lie down upon if i go
to bed till he return will be stuffed with bolt-upright awls bodkins 
corking-pins and packing needles already i can fancy that to pink my
body like my mind i need only to be put into a hogshead stuck full of
steel-pointed spikes and rolled down a hill three times as high as the
monument 

but i lose time yet know not how to employ it till this fellow returns
with the sequel of thy soul-harrowing intelligence 



letter xviii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
monday night july 17 


on my return to rowland's i found that the apothecary was just gone up 
mrs rowland being above with him i made the less scruple to go up too 
as it was probable that to ask for leave would be to ask to be denied 
hoping also that the letters had with me would be a good excuse 

she was sitting on the side of the broken couch extremely weak and low 
and i observed cared not to speak to the man and no wonder for i
never saw a more shocking fellow of a profession tolerably genteel nor
heard a more illiterate one prate physician in ordinary to this house 
and others like it i suppose he put me in mind of otway's apothecary
in his caius marius as borrowed from the immortal shakspeare 

 meagre and very rueful were his looks 
 sharp misery had worn him to the bones 
 famine in his cheeks 
 need and oppression staring in his eyes 
 contempt and beggary hanging on his back 
 the world no friend of his nor the world's law 

as i am in black he took me at my entrance i believe to be a doctor 
and slunk behind me with his hat upon his two thumbs and looked as if he
expected the oracle to open and give him orders 

the lady looked displeased as well at me as at rowland who followed me 
and at the apothecary it was not she said the least of her present
misfortunes that she could not be left to her own sex and to her option
to see whom she pleased 

i besought her excuse and winking for the apothecary to withdraw  which
he did   told her that i had been at her new lodgings to order every
thing to be got ready for reception presuming she would choose to go
thither that i had a chair at the door that mr smith and his wife  i
named their names that she should not have room for the least fear of
sinclair's  had been full of apprehensions for her safety that i had
brought two letters which were left there fore her the one by the post 
the other that very morning 

this took her attention she held out her charming hand for them took
them and pressing them to her lips from the only friend i have in the
world said she kissing them again and looking at the seals as if to
see whether they had been opened i can't read them said she my eyes
are too dim and put them into her bosom 

i besought her to think of quitting that wretched hole 

whither could she go she asked to be safe and uninterrupted for the
short remainder of her life and to avoid being again visited by the
creatures who had insulted her before 

i gave her the solemnest assurances that she should not be invaded in her
new lodgings by any body and said that i would particularly engage my
honour that the person who had most offended her should not come near
her without her own consent 

your honour sir are you not that man's friend 

i am not a friend madam to his vile actions to the most excellent of
women 

do you flatter me sir then you are a man but oh sir your friend 
holding her face forward with great earnestness your barbarous friend 
what has he not to answer for 

there she stopt her heart full and putting her hand over her eyes and
forehead the tears tricked through her fingers resenting thy barbarity 
it seemed as caesar did the stab from his distinguished brutus 

though she was so very much disordered i thought i would not lose this
opportunity to assert your innocence of this villanous arrest 

there is no defending the unhappy man in any of his vile actions by you 
madam but of this last outrage by all that's good and sacred he is
innocent 

o wretches what a sex is your's have you all one dialect good and
sacred if sir you can find an oath or a vow or an adjuration that
my ears have not been twenty times a day wounded with then speak it and
i may again believe a man 

i was excessively touched at these words knowing thy baseness and the
reason she had for them 

but say you sir for i would not methinks have the wretch capable of
this sordid baseness say you that he is innocent of this last
wickedness can you truly say that he is 

by the great god of heaven 

nay sir if you swear i must doubt you if you yourself think your
word insufficient what reliance can i have on your oath o that this my
experience had not cost me so dear but were i to love a thousand years 
i would always suspect the veracity of a swearer excuse me sir but is
it likely that he who makes so free with his god will scruple any thing
that may serve his turn with his fellow creature 

this was a most affecting reprimand 

madam said i i have a regard a regard a gentleman ought to have to my
word and whenever i forfeit it to you 

nay sir don't be angry with me it is grievous to me to question a
gentleman's veracity but your friend calls himself a gentleman you
know not what i have suffered by a gentleman and then again she wept 

i would give you madam demonstration if your grief and your weakness
would permit it that he has no hand in this barbarous baseness and that
he resents it as it ought to be resented 

well well sir  with quickness   he will have his account to make up
somewhere else not to me i should not be sorry to find him able to
acquit his intention on this occasion let him know sir only one
thing that when you heard me in the bitterness of my spirit most
vehemently exclaim against the undeserved usage i have met with from him 
that even then in that passionate moment i was able to say  and never
did i see such an earnest and affecting exultation of hands and eyes  
give him good god repentance and amendment that i may be the last
poor creature who shall be ruined by him and in thine own good time 
receive to thy mercy the poor wretch who had none on me 

by my soul i could not speak she had not her bible before her for
nothing 

i was forced to turn my head away and to take out my handkerchief 

what an angel is this even the gaoler and his wife and maid wept 

again i wish thou hadst been there that thou mightest have sunk down at
her feet and begun that moment to reap the effect of her generous wishes
for thee undeserving as thou art of any thing but perdition 

i represented to her that she would be less free where she was from
visits she liked not than at her own lodgings i told her that it
would probably bring her in particular one visiter who otherwise i
would engage  but i durst not swear again after the severe reprimand
she had just given me   should not come near her without her consent 
and i expressed my surprize that she should be unwilling to quit such a
place as this when it was more than probable that some of her friends 
when it was known how bad she was would visit her 

she said the place when she was first brought into it was indeed very
shocking to her but that she had found herself so weak and ill and her
griefs had so sunk her that she did not expect to have lived till now 
that therefore all places had been alike to her for to die in a prison 
was to die and equally eligible as to die in a palace  palaces she
said could have no attractions for a dying person   but that since she
feared she was not so soon to be released as she had hoped since she
was suffered to be so little mistress of herself here and since she
might by removal be in the way of her dear friend's letters she would
hope that she might depend upon the assurances i gave her of being at
liberty to return to her last lodgings otherwise she would provide
herself with new ones out of my knowledge as well as your's and that
i was too much of a gentleman to be concerned in carrying her back to
the house she had so much reason to abhor and to which she had been once
before most vilely betrayed to her ruin 

i assured her in the strongest terms  but swore not   that you were
resolved not to molest her and as a proof of the sincerity of my
professions besought her to give me directions in pursuance of my
friend's express desire about sending all her apparel and whatever
belonged to her to her new lodgings 

she seemed pleased and gave me instantly out of her pocket her keys 
asking me if mrs smith whom i had named might not attend me and she
would give her further directions to which i cheerfully assented and
then she told me that she would accept of the chair i had offered her 

i withdrew and took the opportunity to be civil to rowland and his maid 
for she found no fault with their behaviour for what they were and the
fellow seems to be miserably poor i sent also for the apothecary who
is as poor as the officer and still poorer i dare say as to the skill
required in his business and satisfied him beyond his hopes 

the lady after i had withdrawn attempted to read the letters i had
brought her but she could read but a little way in one of them and had
great emotions upon it 

she told the woman she would take a speedy opportunity to acknowledge her
civilities and her husband's and to satisfy the apothecary who might
send her his bill to her lodgings 

she gave the maid something probably the only half-guinea she had and
then with difficulty her limbs trembling under her and supported by
mrs rowland got down stairs 

i offered my arm she was pleased to lean upon it i doubt sir said
she as she moved i have behaved rudely to you but if you knew all 
you would forgive me 

i know enough madam to convince me that there is not such purity and
honour in any woman upon earth nor any one that has been so barbarously
treated 

she looked at me very earnestly what she thought i cannot say but in
general i never saw so much soul in a woman's eyes as in her's 

i ordered my servant whose mourning made him less observable as such 
and who had not been in the lady's eye to keep the chair in view and
to bring me word how she did when set down the fellow had the thought
to step into the shop just before the chair entered it under pretence
of buying snuff and so enabled himself to give me an account that she
was received with great joy by the good woman of the house who told her 
she was but just come in and was preparing to attend her in high
holborn o mrs smith said she as soon as she saw her did you not
think i was run away you don't know what i have suffered since i saw
you i have been in a prison arrested for debts i owe not but 
thank god i am here will your maid i have forgot her name already 

catharine madam 

will you let catharine assist me to bed i have not had my clothes off
since thursday night 

what she further said the fellow heard not she leaning upon the maid 
and going up stairs 

but dost thou not observe what a strange what an uncommon openness of
heart reigns in this lady she had been in a prison she said before a
stranger in the shop and before the maid-servant and so probably she
would have said had there been twenty people in the shop 

the disgrace she cannot hide from herself as she says in her letter to
lady betty she is not solicitous to conceal from the world 

but this makes it evident to me that she is resolved to keep no terms
with thee and yet to be able to put up such a prayer for thee as she
did in her prison  i will often mention the prison-room to tease thee  
does this not show that revenge has very little sway in her mind though
she can retain so much proper resentment 

and this is another excellence in this admirable woman's character for
whom before her have we met with in the whole sex or in ours either 
that knew how in practice to distinguish between revenge and
resentment for base and ungrateful treatment 

tis a cursed thing after all that such a woman as this should be
treated as she has been treated hadst thou been a king and done as
thou hast done by such a meritorious innocent i believe in my heart it
would have been adjudged to be a national sin and the sword the
pestilence or famine must have atoned for it but as thou art a
private man thou wilt certainly meet with thy punishment besides what
thou mayest expect from the justice of the country and the vengeance of
her friends as she will her reward hereafter 

it must be so if there be really such a thing as future remuneration as
now i am more and more convinced there must else what a hard fate is
her's whose punishment to all appearance has so much exceeded her
fault and as to thine how can temporary burnings wert thou by some
accident to be consumed in thy bed expiate for thy abominable vileness
to her in breach of all obligations moral and divine 

i was resolved to lose no time in having every thing which belonged to
the lady at the cursed woman's sent her accordingly i took coach to
smith's and procured the lady to whom i sent up my compliments and
inquiries how she bore her removal ill as she sent down word she was 
to give proper direction to mrs smith whom i took with me to
sinclair's and who saw every thing looked out and put into the trunks
and boxes they were first brought in and carried away in two coaches 

had i not been there sally and polly would each of them have taken to
herself something of the poor lady's spoils this they declared and i
had some difficulty to get from sally a fine brussels-lace head which
she had the confidence to say she would wear for miss harlowe's sake 
nor should either i or mrs smith have known she had got it had she not
been in search of the ruffles belonging to it 

my resentment on this occasion and the conversation which mrs smith and
i had in which i not only expatiated on the merits of the lady but
expressed my concern for her sufferings though i left her room to
suppose her married yet without averring it gave me high credit with
the good woman so that we are perfectly well acquainted already by
which means i shall be enabled to give you accounts from time to time of
all that passes and which i will be very industrious to do provided i
may depend upon the solemn promises i have given the lady in your name 
as well as in my own that she shall be free from all personal
molestation from you and thus shall i have it in my power to return in
kind your writing favours and preserve my short-hand besides which 
till this correspondence was opened i had pretty much neglected 

i ordered the abandoned women to make out your account they answered 
that they would do it with a vengeance indeed they breathe nothing but
vengeance for now they say you will assuredly marry and your example
will be followed by all your friends and companions as the old one says 
to the utter ruin of her poor house 



letter xix

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
tuesday morn july 18 six o'clock 


having sat up so late to finish and seal in readiness my letter to the
above period i am disturbed before i wished to have risen by the
arrival of thy second fellow man and horse in a foam 

while he baits i will write a few lines most heartily to congratulate
thee on thy expected rage and impatience and on thy recovery of mental
feeling 

how much does the idea thou givest me of thy deserved torments by thy
upright awls bodkins pins and packing-needles by thy rolling hogshead
with iron spikes and by thy macerated sides delight me 

i will upon every occasion that offers drive more spikes into thy
hogshead and roll thee down hill and up as thou recoverest to sense 
or rather returnest back to senselessness thou knowest therefore the
terms on which thou art to enjoy my correspondence am not i who have
all along and in time protested against thy barbarous and ungrateful
perfidies to a woman so noble entitled to drive remorse if possible 
into thy hitherto-callous heart 

only let me repeat one thing which perhaps i mentioned too slightly
before that the lady was determined to remove to new lodgings where
neither you nor i should be able to find her had i not solemnly assured
her that she might depend upon being free from your visits 

these assurances i thought i might give her not only because of your
promise but because it is necessary for you to know where she is in
order to address yourself to her by your friends 

enable me therefore to make good to her this my solemn engagement or
adieu to all friendship at least to all correspondence with thee for
ever 

j belford 



letter xx

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
tuesday july 18 afternoon 


i renewed my inquiries after the lady's health in the morning by my
servant and as soon as i had dined i went myself 

i had but a poor account of it yet sent up my compliments she returned
me thanks for all my good offices and her excuses that they could not
be personal just then being very low and faint but if i gave myself the
trouble of coming about six this evening she should be able she hoped 
to drink a dish of tea with me and would then thank me herself 

i am very proud of this condescension and think it looks not amiss for
you as i am your avowed friend methinks i want fully to remove from
her mind all doubts of you in this last villanous action and who knows
then what your noble relations may be able to do for you with her if you
hold your mind for your servant acquainted me with their having
actually engaged miss howe in their and your favour before this cursed
affair happened and i desire the particulars of all from yourself that
i may the better know how to serve you 

she has two handsome apartments a bed-chamber and dining-room with
light closets in each she has already a nurse the people of the house
having but one maid a woman whose care diligence and honesty mrs 
smith highly commends she has likewise the benefit of a widow
gentlewoman mrs lovick her name who lodges over her apartment and of
whom she seems very fond having found something in her she thinks 
resembling the qualities of her worthy mrs norton 

about seven o'clock this morning it seems the lady was so ill that she
yielded to their desires to have an apothecary sent for not the fellow 
thou mayest believe she had had before at rowland's but one mr 
goddard a man of skill and eminence and of conscience too demonstrated
as well by general character as by his prescriptions to this lady for
pronouncing her case to be grief he ordered for the present only
innocent juleps by way of cordial and as soon as her stomach should be
able to bear it light kitchen-diet telling mrs lovick that that with
air moderate exercise and cheerful company would do her more good than
all the medicines in his shop 

this has given me as it seems it has the lady who also praises his
modest behaviour paternal looks and genteel address a very good
opinion of the man and i design to make myself acquainted with him and 
if he advises to call in a doctor to wish him for the fair patient's
sake more than the physician's who wants not practice my worthy
friend dr h whose character is above all exception as his humanity i
am sure will distinguish him to the lady 

mrs lovick gratified me with an account of a letter she had written from
the lady's mouth to miss howe she being unable to write herself with
steadiness 

it was to this effect in answer it seems to her two letters whatever
were the contents of them 

that she had been involved in a dreadful calamity which she was sure 
when known would exempt her from the effects of her friendly
displeasure for not answering her first having been put under an
arrest could she have believed it that she was released but the day
before and was now so weak and so low that she was obliged to account
thus for her silence to her  miss howe's  two letters of the 13th and
16th that she would as soon as able answer them begged of her mean
time not to be uneasy for her since only that this was a calamity
which came upon her when she was far from being well a load laid upon
the shoulders of a poor wretch ready before to sink under too heavy a
burden it was nothing to the evil she had before suffered and one
felicity seemed likely to issue from it which was that she would be
at rest in an honest house with considerate and kind-hearted people 
having assurance given her that she should not be molested by the
wretch whom it would be death for her to see so that now she  miss
howe   needed not to send to her by private and expensive conveyances 
nor need collins to take precautions for fear of being dogged to her
lodgings nor need she write by a fictitious name to her but by her
own 

you can see i am in a way to oblige you you see how much she depends
upon my engaging for your forbearing to intrude yourself into her
company let not your flaming impatience destroy all and make me look
like a villain to a lady who has reason to suspect every man she sees to
be so upon this condition you may expect all the services that can
flow from

your sincere well-wisher 
j belford 



letter xxi

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
tuesday night july 18 


i am just come from the lady i was admitted into the dining-room where
she was sitting in an elbow-chair in a very weak and low way she made
an effort to stand up when i entered but was forced to keep her seat 
you'll excuse me mr belford i ought to rise to thank you for all your
kindness to me i was to blame to be so loth to leave that sad place 
for i am in heaven here to what i was there and good people about me
too i have not had good people about me for a long long time before 
so that  with a half-smile  i had begun to wonder whither they were all
gone 

her nurse and mrs smith who were present took occasion to retire and 
when we were alone you seem to be a person of humanity sir said she 
you hinted as i was leaving my prison that you were not a stranger to
my sad story if you know it truly you must know that i have been most
barbarously treated and have not deserved it at the man's hands by whom
i have suffered 

i told her i knew enough to be convinced that she had the merit of a
saint and the purity of an angel and was proceeding when she said no
flighty compliments no undue attributes sir 

i offered to plead for my sincerity and mentioned the word politeness 
and would have distinguished between that and flattery nothing can be
polite said she that is not just whatever i may have had i have now
no vanity to gratify 

i disclaimed all intentions of compliment all i had said and what i
should say was and should be the effect of sincere veneration my
unhappy friend's account of her had entitled her to that 

i then mentioned your grief your penitence your resolutions of making
her all the amends that were possible now to be made her and in the most
earnest manner i asserted your innocence as to the last villanous
outrage 

her answer was to this effect it is painful to me to think of him the
amends you talk of cannot be made this last violence you speak of is
nothing to what preceded it that cannot be atoned for nor palliated 
this may and i shall not be sorry to be convinced that he cannot be
guilty of so very low a wickedness yet after his vile forgeries of
hands after his baseness in imposing upon me the most infamous persons
as ladies of honour of his own family what are the iniquities he is not
capable of 

i would then have given her an account of the trial you stood with your
friends your own previous resolutions of marriage had she honoured you
with the requested four words all your family's earnestness to have the
honour of her alliance and the application of your two cousins to miss
howe by general consent for that young lady's interest with her but 
having just touched upon these topics she cut me short saying that was
a cause before another tribunal miss howe's letters to her were upon the
subject and as she would write her thoughts to her as soon as she was
able 

i then attempted more particularly to clear you of having any hand in the
vile sinclair's officious arrest a point she had the generosity to wish
you cleared of and having mentioned the outrageous letter you had
written to me on this occasion she asked if i had that letter about me 

i owned i had 

she wished to see it 

this puzzled me horribly for you must needs think that most of the free
things which among us rakes pass for wit and spirit must be shocking
stuff to the ears or eyes of persons of delicacy of that sex and then
such an air of levity runs through thy most serious letters such a false
bravery endeavouring to carry off ludicrously the subjects that most
affect thee that those letters are generally the least fit to be seen 
which ought to be most to thy credit 

something like this i observed to her and would fain have excused myself
from showing it but she was so earnest that i undertook to read some
parts of it resolving to omit the most exceptionable 

i know thou'lt curse me for that but i thought it better to oblige her
than to be suspected myself and so not have it in my power to serve thee
with her when so good a foundation was laid for it and when she knows
as bad of thee as i can tell her 

thou rememberest the contents i suppose of thy furious letter her
remarks upon the different parts of it which i read to her were to the
following effect 


 see letter xii of this volume 


upon the last two lines all undone undone by jupiter zounds jack 
what shall i do now a curse upon all my plots and contrivances thus she
expressed herself 

o how light how unaffected with the sense of its own crimes is the
heart that could dictate to the pen this libertine froth 

the paragraph which mentions the vile arrest affected her a good deal 

in the next i omitted thy curse upon thy relations whom thou wert
gallanting and read on the seven subsequent paragraphs down to thy
execrable wish which was too shocking to read to her what i read
produced the following reflections from her 

the plots and contrivances which he curses and the exultings of the
wicked wretches on finding me out show me that all his guilt was
premeditated nor doubt i that his dreadful perjuries and inhuman arts 
as he went along were to pass for fine stratagems for witty sport and
to demonstrate a superiority of inventive talents o my cruel cruel
brother had it not been for thee i had not been thrown upon so
pernicious and so despicable a plotter but proceed sir pray proceed 

at that part canst thou o fatal prognosticator tell me where my
punishment will end she sighed and when i came to that sentence 
praying for my reformation perhaps is that there said she sighing
again wretched man and shed a tear for thee by my faith lovelace 
i believe she hates thee not she has at least a concern a generous
concern for thy future happiness what a noble creature hast thou
injured 

she made a very severe reflection upon me on reading the words on your
knees for me beg her pardon you had all your lessons sir said she 
when you came to redeem me you was so condescending as to kneel i
thought it was the effect of your own humanity and good-natured
earnestness to serve me excuse me sir i knew not that it was in
consequence of a prescribed lesson 

this concerned me not a little i could not bear to be thought such a
wretched puppet such a joseph leman such a tomlinson i endeavoured 
therefore with some warmth to clear myself of this reflection and she
again asked my excuse i was avowedly she said the friend of a man 
whose friendship she had reason to be sorry to say was no credit to any
body  and desired me to proceed 

i did but fared not much better afterwards for on that passage where
you say i had always been her friend and advocate this was her
unanswerable remark i find sir by this expression that he had always
designs against me and that you all along knew that he had would to
heaven you had had the goodness to have contrived some way that might
not have endangered your own safety to give me notice of his baseness 
since you approved not of it but you gentlemen i suppose had rather
see an innocent fellow-creature ruined than be thought capable of an
action which however generous might be likely to loosen the bands of a
wicked friendship 

after this severe but just reflection i would have avoided reading the
following although i had unawares begun the sentence but she held me
to it what would i now give had i permitted you to have been a
successful advocate and this was her remark upon it so sir you see 
if you had been the happy means of preventing the evils designed me you
would have had your friend's thanks for it when he came to his
consideration this satisfaction i am persuaded every one in the long
run will enjoy who has the virtue to withstand or prevent a wicked
purpose i was obliged i see to your kind wishes but it was a point
of honour with you to keep his secret the more indispensable with you 
perhaps the viler the secret yet permit me to wish mr belford that
you were capable of relishing the pleasures that arise to a benevolent
mind from virtuous friendship none other is worthy of the sacred name 
you seem an humane man i hope for your own sake you will one day
experience the difference and when you do think of miss howe and
clarissa harlowe i find you know much of my sad story who were the
happiest creatures on earth in each other's friendship till this friend
of your's' and there she stopt and turned from me 

where thou callest thyself a villanous plotter to take a crime to
himself said she without shame o what a hardened wretch is this man 

on that passage where thou sayest let me know how she has been treated 
if roughly woe be to the guilty this was her remark with an air of
indignation what a man is your friend sir is such a one as he to set
himself up to punish the guilty all the rough usage i could receive
from them was infinitely less' and there she stopt a moment or two 
then proceeding and who shall punish him what an assuming wretch 
nobody but himself is entitled to injure the innocent he is i suppose 
on the earth to act the part which the malignant fiend is supposed to
act below dealing out punishments at his pleasure to every inferior
instrument of mischief 

what thought i have i been doing i shall have this savage fellow
think i have been playing him booty in reading part of his letter to
this sagacious lady yet if thou art angry it can only in reason 
be at thyself for who would think i might not communicate to her some
of thy sincerity in exculpating thyself from a criminal charge which
thou wrotest to thy friend to convince him of thy innocence but a bad
heart and a bad cause are confounded things and so let us put it to its
proper account 

i passed over thy charge to me to curse them by the hour and thy names
of dragon and serpents though so applicable since had i read them 
thou must have been supposed to know from the first what creatures they
were vile fellow as thou wert for bringing so much purity among them 
and i closed with thy own concluding paragraph a line a line a kingdom
for a line etc however telling her since she saw that i omitted some
sentences that there were farther vehemences in it but as they were
better fitted to show to me the sincerity of the writer than for so
delicate an ear as her's to hear i chose to pass them over 

you have read enough said she he is a wicked wicked man i see he
intended to have me in his power at any rate and i have no doubt of what
his purposes were by what his actions have been you know his vile
tomlinson i suppose you know but what signifies talking never was
there such a premeditated false heart in man  nothing can be truer 
thought i   what has he not vowed what has he not invented and all for
what only to ruin a poor young creature whom he ought to have
protected and whom he had first deceived of all other protection 

she arose and turned from me her handkerchief at her eyes and after a
pause came towards me again i hope said she i talk to a man who has
a better heart and i thank you sir for all your kind though
ineffectual pleas in my favour formerly whether the motives for them
were compassion or principle or both that they were ineffectual 
might very probably be owing to your want of earnestness and that as
you might think to my want of merit i might not in your eye deserve
to be saved i might appear to you a giddy creature who had run away
from her true and natural friends and who therefore ought to take the
consequence of the lot she had drawn 

i was afraid for thy sake to let her know how very earnest i had been 
but assured her that i had been her zealous friend and that my motives
were founded upon a merit that i believed was never equaled that 
however indefensible mr lovelace was he had always done justice to her
virtue that to a full conviction of her untainted honour it was owing
that he so earnestly desired to call so inestimable a jewel his and was
proceeding when she again cut me short 

enough and too much of this subject sir if he will never more let me
behold his face that is all i have now to ask of him indeed indeed 
clasping her hands i never will if i can by any means not criminally
desperate avoid it 

what could i say for thee there was no room however at that time to
touch this string again for fear of bringing upon myself a prohibition 
not only of the subject but of ever attending her again 

i gave some distant intimations of money-matters i should have told
thee when i read to her that passage where thou biddest me force what
sums upon her i can get her to take she repeated no no no no 
several times with great quickness and i durst no more than just
intimate it again and that so darkly as left her room to seem not to
understand me 

indeed i know not the person man or woman i should be so much afraid
of disobliging or incurring a censure from as from her she has so
much true dignity in her manner without pride or arrogance which in
those who have either one is tempted to mortify such a piercing eye 
yet softened so sweetly with rays of benignity that she commands all
one's reverence 

methinks i have a kind of holy love for this angel of a woman and it is
matter of astonishment to me that thou couldst converse with her a
quarter of an hour together and hold thy devilish purposes 

guarded as she was by piety prudence virtue dignity family fortune 
and a purity of heart that never woman before her boasted what a real
devil must he be yet i doubt i shall make thee proud who could resolve
to break through so many fences 

for my own part i am more and more sensible that i ought not to have
contented myself with representing against and expostulating with thee
upon thy base intentions and indeed i had it in my head more than
once to try to do something for her but wretch that i was i was
with-held by notions of false honour as she justly reproached me 
because of thy own voluntary communications to me of thy purposes and
then as she was brought into such a cursed house and was so watched by
thyself as well as by thy infernal agents i thought knowing my man 
that i should only accelerate the intended mischiefs moreover finding
thee so much over-awed by her virtue that thou hadst not at thy first
carrying her thither the courage to attempt her and that she had more
than once without knowing thy base views obliged thee to abandon them 
and to resolve to do her justice and thyself honour i hardly doubted 
that her merit would be triumphant at last 

it is my opinion if thou holdest thy purposes to marry that thou
canst not do better than to procure thy real aunts and thy real cousins 
to pay her a visit and to be thy advocates but if they decline
personal visits letters from them and from my lord m supported by miss
howe's interest may perhaps effect something in thy favour 

but these are only my hopes founded on what i wish for thy sake the
lady i really think would choose death rather than thee and the two
women are of opinion though they knew not half of what she has suffered 
that her heart is actually broken 

at taking my leave i tendered my best services to her and besought her
to permit me frequently to inquire after her health 

she made me no answer but by bowing her head 



letter xxii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
wednesday july 19 


this morning i took a chair to smith's and being told that the lady had
a very bad night but was up i sent for her worthy apothecary who on
his coming to me approving of my proposal of calling in dr h i bid
the woman acquaint her with the designed visit 

it seems she was at first displeased yet withdrew her objection but 
after a pause asked them what she should do she had effects of value 
some of which she intended as soon as she could to turn into money 
but till then had not a single guinea to give the doctor for his fee 

mrs lovick said she had five guineas by her they were at her service 

she would accept of three she said if she would take that pulling a
diamond ring from her finger till she repaid her but on no other terms 

having been told i was below with mr goddard she desired to speak one
word with me before she saw the doctor 

she was sitting in an elbow-chair leaning her head on a pillow mrs 
smith and the widow on each side her chair her nurse with a phial of
hartshorn behind her in her own hand her salts 

raising her head at my entrance she inquired if the doctor knew mr 
lovelace 

i told her no and that i believed you never saw him in your life 

was the doctor my friend 

he was and a very worthy and skilful man i named him for his eminence
in his profession and mr goddard said he knew not a better physician 

i have but one condition to make before i see the gentleman that he
refuse not his fees from me if i am poor sir i am proud i will not
be under obligation you may believe sir i will not i suffer this
visit because i would not appear ungrateful to the few friends i have
left nor obstinate to such of my relations as may some time hence for
their private satisfaction inquire after my behaviour in my sick hours 
so sir you know the condition and don't let me be vexed i am very
ill and cannot debate the matter 

seeing her so determined i told her if it must be so it should 

then sir the gentleman may come but i shall not be able to answer
many questions nurse you can tell him at the window there what a night
i have had and how i have been for two days past and mr goddard if
he be here can let him know what i have taken pray let me be as little
questioned as possible 

the doctor paid his respects to her with the gentlemanly address for
which he is noted and she cast up her sweet eyes to him with that
benignity which accompanies her every graceful look 

i would have retired but she forbid it 

he took her hand the lily not of so beautiful a white indeed madam 
you are very low said he but give me leave to say that you can do more
for yourself than all the faculty can do for you 

he then withdrew to the window and after a short conference with the
women he turned to me and to mr goddard at the other window we can
do nothing here speaking low but by cordials and nourishment what
friends has the lady she seems to be a person of condition and ill as
she is a very fine woman a single lady i presume 

i whisperingly told him she was that there were extraordinary
circumstances in her case as i would have apprized him had i met with
him yesterday that her friends were very cruel to her but that she
could not hear them named without reproaching herself though they were
much more to blame than she 

i knew i was right said the doctor a love-case mr goddard a
love-case mr belford there is one person in the world who can do her
more service than all the faculty 

mr goddard said he had apprehended her disorder was in her mind and had
treated her accordingly and then told the doctor what he had done which
he approving of again taking her charming hand said my good young
lady you will require very little of our assistance you must in a
great measure be your own assistance you must in a great measure be
your own doctress come dear madam  forgive me the familiar
tenderness your aspect commands love as well as reverence and a father
of children some of them older than yourself may be excused for his
familiar address   cheer up your spirits resolve to do all in your
power to be well and you'll soon grow better 

you are very kind sir said she i will take whatever you direct my
spirits have been hurried i shall be better i believe before i am
worse the care of my good friends here looking at the women shall not
meet with an ungrateful return 

the doctor wrote he would fain have declined his fee as her malady 
he said was rather to be relieved by the soothings of a friend than by
the prescriptions of a physician he should think himself greatly
honoured to be admitted rather to advise her in the one character than
to prescribe to her in the other 

she answered that she should be always glad to see so humane a man that
his visits would keep her in charity with his sex but that where  sic 
she able to forget that he was her physician she might be apt to abate
of the confidence in his skill which might be necessary to effect the
amendment that was the end of his visits 

and when he urged her still further which he did in a very polite
manner and as passing by the door two or three times a day she said she
should always have pleasure in considering him in the kind light he
offered himself to her that that might be very generous in one person to
offer which would be as ungenerous in another to accept that indeed she
was not at present high in circumstance and he saw by the tender which
he must accept of that she had greater respect to her own convenience
than to his merit or than to the pleasure she should take in his visits 

we all withdrew together and the doctor and mr goddard having a great
curiosity to know something more of her story at the motion of the
latter we went into a neighbouring coffee-house and i gave them in
confidence a brief relation of it making all as light for you as i
could and yet you'll suppose that in order to do but common justice
to the lady's character heavy must be that light 


three o'clock afternoon 

i just now called again at smith's and am told she is somewhat better 
which she attributed to the soothings of her doctor she expressed
herself highly pleased with both gentlemen and said that their behaviour
to her was perfectly paternal 

paternal poor lady never having been till very lately from under
her parents' wings and now abandoned by all her friends she is for
finding out something paternal and maternal in every one the latter
qualities in mrs lovick and mrs smith to supply to herself the father
and mother her dutiful heart pants after 

mrs smith told me that after we were gone she gave the keys of her
trunk and drawers to her and the widow lovick and desired them to take
an inventory of them which they did in her presence 

they also informed me that she had requested them to find her a
purchaser for two rich dressed suits one never worn the other not above
once or twice 

this shocked me exceedingly perhaps it may thee a little her reason
for so doing she told them was that she should never live to wear
them that her sister and other relations were above wearing them that
her mother would not endure in her sight any thing that was her's that
she wanted the money that she would not be obliged to any body when she
had effects by her for which she had no occasion and yet said she i
expect not that they will fetch a price answerable to their value 

they were both very much concerned as they owned and asked my advice
upon it and the richness of her apparel having given them a still higher
notion of her rank than they had before they supposed she must be of
quality and again wanted to know her story 

i told them that she was indeed a woman of family and fortune i still
gave them room to suppose her married but left it to her to tell them
all in her own time and manner all i would say was that she had been
very vilely treated deserved it not and was all innocence and purity 

you may suppose that they both expressed their astonishment that there
could be a man in the world who could ill treat so fine a creature 

as to the disposing of the two suits of apparel i told mrs smith that
she should pretend that upon inquiry she had found a friend who would
purchase the richest of them but that she might not mistrust would
stand upon a good bargain and having twenty guineas about me i left
them with her in part of payment and bid her pretend to get her to part
with it for as little more as she could induce her to take 

i am setting out for edgeware with poor belton more of whom in my next 
i shall return to-morrow and leave this in readiness for your messenger 
if he call in my absence 

adieu 



letter xxiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
 in answer to letter xxi of this volume  
m hall wed night july 19 


you might well apprehend that i should think you were playing me booty in
communicating my letter to the lady 

you ask who would think you might not read to her the least
exceptionable parts of a letter written in my own defence i'll tell you
who the man who in the same letter that he asks this question tells
the friend whom he exposes to her resentment that there is such an air
of levity runs through his most serious letters that those of this are
least fit to be seen which ought to be most to his credit  and now what
thinkest thou of thyself-condemned folly be however i charge thee 
more circumspect for the future that so this clumsy error may stand
singly by itself 

it is painful to her to think of me  libertine froth  so pernicious
and so despicable a plotter  a man whose friendship is no credit to any
body  hardened wretch  the devil's counterpart  a wicked wicked
man  but did she could she dared she to say or imply all this and
say it to a man whom she praises for humanity and prefers to myself for
that virtue when all the humanity he shows and she knows it too is by
my direction so robs me of the credit of my own works admirably
entitled all this shows her to thy refinement upon the words resentment
and revenge but thou wert always aiming and blundering at some thing
thou never couldst make out 

the praise thou givest to her ingenuousness is another of thy peculiars 
i think not as thou dost of her tell-tale recapitulations and
exclamations what end can they answer only that thou hast a holy love
for her  the devil fetch thee for thy oddity   or it is extremely
provoking to suppose one sees such a charming creature stand upright
before a libertine and talk of the sin against her that cannot be
forgiven i wish at my heart that these chaste ladies would have a
little modesty in their anger it would sound very strange if i robert
lovelace should pretend to have more true delicacy in a point that
requires the utmost than miss clarissa harlowe 

i think i will put it into the head of her nurse norton and her miss
howe by some one of my agents to chide the dear novice for her
proclamations 

but to be serious let me tell thee that severe as she is and saucy 
in asking so contemptuously what a man is your friend sir to set
himself to punish guilty people  i will never forgive the cursed woman 
who could commit this last horrid violence on so excellent a creature 

the barbarous insults of the two nymphs in their visits to her the
choice of the most execrable den that could be found out in order no
doubt to induce her to go back to theirs and the still more execrable
attempt to propose to her a man who would pay the debt a snare i make
no question laid for her despairing and resenting heart by that devilish
sally thinking her no doubt a woman in order to ruin her with me 
and to provoke me in a fury to give her up to their remorseless
cruelty are outrages that to express myself in her style i never can 
never will forgive 

but as to thy opinion and the two women's at smith's that her heart is
broken that is the true women's language i wonder how thou camest into
it thou who hast seen and heard of so many female deaths and revivals 

i'll tell thee what makes against this notion of theirs 

her time of life and charming constitution the good she ever delighted
to do and fancified she was born to do and which she may still continue
to do to as high a degree as ever nay higher since i am no sordid
varlet thou knowest her religious turn a turn that will always teach
her to bear inevitable evils with patience the contemplation upon her
last noble triumph over me and over the whole crew and upon her
succeeding escape from us all her will unviolated and the inward pride
of having not deserved the treatment she has met with 

how is it possible to imagine that a woman who has all these
consolations to reflect upon will die of a broken heart 

on the contrary i make no doubt but that as she recovers from the
dejection into which this last scurvy villany which none but wretches
of her own sex could have been guilty of has thrown her returning love
will re-enter her time-pacified mind her thoughts will then turn once
more on the conjugal pivot of course she will have livelier notions in
her head and these will make her perform all her circumvolutions with
ease and pleasure though not with so high a degree of either as if the
dear proud rogue could have exalted herself above the rest of her sex as
she turned round 

thou askest on reciting the bitter invectives that the lady made against
thy poor friend standing before her i suppose with thy fingers in thy
mouth what couldst thou say for me 

have i not in my former letters suggested an hundred things which a
friend in earnest to vindicate or excuse a friend might say on such an
occasion 

but now to current topics and the present state of matters here it is
true as my servant told thee that miss howe had engaged before this
cursed woman's officiousness to use her interest with her friend in my
behalf and yet she told my cousins in the visit they made her that it
was her opinion that she would never forgive me i send to thee enclosed
copies of all that passed on this occasion between my cousins montague 
miss howe myself lady betty lady sarah and lord m 

i long to know what miss howe wrote to her friend in order to induce her
to marry the despicable plotter the man whose friendship is no credit to
any body the wicked wicked man thou hadst the two letters in thy
hand had they been in mine the seal would have yielded to the touch of
my warm finger perhaps without the help of the post-office bullet and
the folds as other placations have done opened of themselves to oblige
my curiosity a wicked omission jack not to contrive to send them down
to me by man and horse it might have passed that the messenger who
brought the second letter took them both back i could have returned
them by another when copied as from miss howe and nobody but myself
and thee the wiser 

that's a charming girl her spirit her delightful spirit not to be
married to it how i wish to get that lively bird into my cage how would
i make her flutter and fly about till she left a feather upon every
wire 

had i begun there i am confident as i have heretofore said that i
should not have had half the difficulty with her as i have had with her
charming friend for these passionate girls have high pulses and a
clever fellow may make what sport he pleases with their unevenness now
too high now too low you need only to provoke and appease them by
turns to bear with them and to forbear to tease and ask pardon and
sometimes to give yourself the merit of a sufferer from them then
catching them in the moment of concession conscious of their ill usage
of you they are all your own 


 see vol vi letter vii 


but these sedate contemplative girls never out of temper but with
reason when that reason is given them hardly ever pardon or afford you
another opportunity to offend 

it was in part the apprehension that this would be so with my dear miss
harlowe that made me carry her to a place where i believed she would be
unable to escape me although i were not to succeed in my first attempts 
else widow sorlings's would have been as well for me as widow sinclair's 
for early i saw that there was no credulity in her to graft upon no
pretending to whine myself into her confidence she was proof against
amorous persuasion she had reason in her love her penetration and
good sense made her hate all compliments that had not truth and nature in
them what could i have done with her in any other place and yet how
long even there was i kept in awe in spite of natural incitement and
unnatural instigations as i now think them by the mere force of that
native dignity and obvious purity of mind and manners which fill every
one with reverence if not with holy love as thou callest it the
moment he sees her else thinkest thou not it was easy for me to be a
fine gentleman and a delicate lover or at least a specious and
flattering one 


 see letter xxi of this volume 


lady sarah and lady betty finding the treaty upon the success of which
they have set their foolish hearts likely to run into length are about
departing to their own seats having taken from me the best security the
nature of the case will admit of that is to say my word to marry the
lady if she will have me 

and after all methinks thou asked art thou still resolved to repair 
if reparation be put into thy power 

why jack i must needs own that my heart has now-and-then some
retrograde motions upon thinking seriously of the irrevocable ceremony 
we do not easily give up the desire of our hearts and what we imagine
essential to our happiness let the expectation or hope of compassing it
be ever so unreasonable or absurd in the opinion of others recurrings
there will be hankerings that will on every but-remotely-favourable
incident however before discouraged and beaten back by ill success 
pop up and abate the satisfaction we should otherwise take in
contrariant overtures 

tis ungentlemanly jack man to man to lie but matrimony i do not
heartily love although with a clarissa yet i am in earnest to marry
her 

but i am often thinking that if now this dear creature suffering time 
and my penitence my relations' prayers and miss howe's mediation to
soften her resentments her revenge thou hast prettily distinguished
away and to recall repulsed inclination should consent to meet me at
the altar how vain will she then make all thy eloquent periods of
execration how many charming interjections of her own will she spoil 
and what a couple of old patriarchs shall we become going in the
mill-horse round getting sons and daughters providing nurses for them
first governors and governesses next teaching them lessons their
fathers never practised nor which their mother as her parents will say 
was much the better for and at last perhaps when life shall be turned
into the dully sober stillness and i become desirous to forget all my
past rogueries what comfortable reflections will it afford to find them
all revived with equal or probably greater trouble and expense in the
persons and manners of so many young lovelaces of the boys and to have
the girls run away with varlets perhaps not half so ingenious as myself 
clumsy fellows as it might happen who could not afford the baggages one
excuse for their weakness besides those disgraceful ones of sex and
nature o belford who can bear to think of these things who at my
time of life especially and with such a bias for mischief 


 see letter xviii of this volume 


of this i am absolutely convinced that if a man ever intends to marry 
and to enjoy in peace his own reflections and not be afraid
retribution or of the consequences of his own example he should never
be a rake 

this looks like conscience don't it belford 

but being in earnest still as i have said all i have to do in my
present uncertainty is to brighten up my faculties by filing off the
rust they have contracted by the town smoke a long imprisonment in my
close attendance to so little purpose on my fair perverse and to brace
up if i can the relaxed fibres of my mind which have been twitched and
convulsed like the nerves of some tottering paralytic by means of the
tumults she has excited in it that so i may be able to present to her a
husband as worthy as i can be of her acceptance or if she reject me be
in a capacity to resume my usual gaiety of heart and show others of the
misleading sex that i am not discouraged by the difficulties i have met
with from this sweet individual of it from endeavouring to make myself
as acceptable to them as before 

in this latter case one tour to france and italy i dare say will do
the business miss harlowe will by that time have forgotten all she has
suffered from her ungrateful lovelace though it will be impossible that
her lovelace should ever forget a woman whose equal he despairs to meet
with were he to travel from one end of the world to the other 

if thou continuest paying off the heavy debts my long letters for so
many weeks together have made thee groan under i will endeavour to
restrain myself in the desires i have importunate as they are of
going to town to throw myself at the feet of my soul's beloved policy
and honesty both join to strengthen the restraint my own promise and thy
engagement have laid me under on this head i would not afresh provoke 
on the contrary would give time for her resentments to subside that so
all that follows may be her own act and deed 


 


hickman  i have a mortal aversion to that fellow   has by a line which
i have just now received requested an interview with me on friday at mr 
dormer's as at a common friend's does the business he wants to meet me
upon require that it should be at a common friend's a challenge
implied is it not belford i shall not be civil to him i doubt he
has been an intermeddler then i envy him on miss howe's account for if
i have a right notion of this hickman it is impossible that that virago
can ever love him 

every one knows that the mother saucy as the daughter sometimes is 
crams him down her throat her mother is one of the most
violent-spirited women in england her late husband could not stand in
the matrimonial contention of who should but tipt off the perch in it 
neither knowing how to yield nor knowing how to conquer 

a charming encouragement for a man of intrigue when he has reason to
believe that the woman he has a view upon has no love for her husband 
what good principles must that wife have who is kept in against
temptation by a sense of her duty and plighted faith where affection
has no hold of her 

pr'ythee let's know very particularly how it fares with poor belton 
tis an honest fellow something more than his thomasine seems to stick
with him 

thou hast not been preaching to him conscience and reformation hast
thou thou shouldest not take liberties with him of this sort unless
thou thoughtest him absolutely irrecoverable a man in ill health and
crop-sick cannot play with these solemn things as thou canst and be
neither better nor worse for them repentance jack i have a notion 
should be set about while a man is in health and spirits what's a man
fit for  not to begin a new work surely   when he is not himself nor
master of his faculties hence as i apprehend it is that a death-bed
repentance is supposed to be such a precarious and ineffectual thing 

as to myself i hope i have a great deal of time before me since i
intend one day to be a reformed man i have very serious reflections
now-and-then yet am i half afraid of the truth of what my charmer once
told me that a man cannot repent when he will not to hold it i
suppose she meant by fits and starts i have repented a thousand times 

casting my eye over the two preceding paragraphs i fancy there is
something like contradiction in them but i will not reconsider them 
the subject is a very serious one i don't at present quite understand
it but now for one more airy 

tourville mowbray and myself pass away our time as pleasantly as
possibly we can without thee i wish we don't add to lord m s gouty
days by the joy we give him 

this is one advantage as i believe i have elsewhere observed that we
male-delinquents in love-matters have of the other sex for while they 
poor things sit sighing in holes and corners or run to woods and groves
to bemoan themselves on their baffled hopes we can rant and roar hunt
and hawk and by new loves banish from our hearts all remembrance of
the old ones 

merrily however as we pass our time my reflections upon the injuries
done to this noble creature bring a qualm upon my heart very often but
i know she will permit me to make her amends after she has plagued me
heartily and that's my consolation 

an honest fellow still clap thy wings and crow jack 



letter xxiv

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
thursday morn june 20 


 text error should be july 


what my dearest creature have been your sufferings what must have
been your anguish on so disgraceful an insult committed in the open
streets and in the broad day 

no end i think of the undeserved calamities of a dear soul who had
been so unhappily driven and betrayed into the hands of a vile libertine 
 how was i shocked at the receiving of your letter written by another
hand and only dictated by you you must be very ill nor is it to be
wondered at but i hope it is rather from hurry and surprise and
lowness which may be overcome than from a grief given way to which may
be attended with effects i cannot bear to think of 

but whatever you do my dear you must not despond indeed you must not
despond hitherto you have been in no fault but despair would be all
your own and the worst fault you can be guilty of 

i cannot bear to look upon another hand instead of your's my dear
creature send me a few lines though ever so few in your own hand if
possible for they will revive my heart especially if they can acquaint
me of your amended health 

i expect your answer to my letter of the 13th we all expect it with
impatience 

his relations are persons of so much honour they are so very earnest to
rank you among them the wretch is so very penitent every one of his
family says he is your own are so implacable your last distress though
the consequence of his former villany yet neither brought on by his
direction nor with his knowledge and so much resented by him that my
mother is absolutely of opinion that you should be his especially if 
yielding to my wishes as expressed in my letter and those of all his
friends you would have complied had it not been for this horrid arrest 

i will enclose the copy of the letter i wrote to miss montague last
tuesday on hearing that nobody knew what was become of you and the
answer to it underwritten and signed by lord m lady sarah sadleir and
lady betty lawrance as well as by the young ladies and also by the
wretch himself 

i own that i like not the turn of what he has written to me and before
i will further interest myself in his favour i have determined to inform
myself by a friend from his own mouth of his sincerity and whether
his whole inclination be in his request to me exclusive of the wishes
of his relations yet my heart rises against him on the supposition
that there is the shadow of a reason for such a question the woman miss
clarissa harlowe but i think with my mother that marriage is now the
only means left to make your future life tolerably easy happy there is
no saying his disgraces in that case in the eye of the world itself 
will be more than your's and to those who know you glorious will be
your triumph 

i am obliged to accompany my mother soon to the isle of wight my aunt
harman is in a declining way and insists upon seeing us both and mr 
hickman too i think 

his sister of whom we had heard so much with her lord were brought
t'other day to visit us she strangely likes me or says she does 

i can't say but that i think she answers the excellent character we heard
of her 

it would be death to me to set out for the little island and not see you
first and yet my mother fond of exerting an authority that she herself 
by that exertion often brings into question insists that my next visit
to you must be a congratulatory one as mrs lovelace 

when i know what will be the result of the questions to be put in my name
to that wretch and what is your mind on my letter of the 13th i shall
tell you more of mine 

the bearer promises to make so much dispatch as to attend you this very
afternoon may he return with good tidings to

your ever affectionate
anna howe 



letter xxv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
thursday afternoon 


you pain me miss howe by the ardour of your noble friendship i will
be brief because i am not well yet a good deal better than i was and
because i am preparing an answer to your's of the 13th but before
hand i must tell you my dear i will not have that man don't be angry
with me but indeed i won't so let him be asked no questions about me 
i beseech you 

i do not despond my dear i hope i may say i will not despond is not
my condition greatly mended i thank heaven it is 

i am no prisoner now in a vile house i am not now in the power of that
man's devices i am not now obliged to hide myself in corners for fear
of him one of his intimate companions is become my warm friend and
engages to keep him from me and that by his own consent i am among
honest people i have all my clothes and effects restored to me the
wretch himself bears testimony to my honour 

indeed i am very weak and ill but i have an excellent physician dr h 
and as worthy an apothecary mr goddard their treatment of me my
dear is perfectly paternal my mind too i can find begins to
strengthen and methinks at times i find myself superior to my
calamities 

i shall have sinkings sometimes i must expect such and my father's
maledict but you will chide me for introducing that now i am
enumerating my comforts 

but i charge you my dear that you do not suffer my calamities to sit
too heavily upon your own mind if you do that will be to new-point
some of those arrows that have been blunted and lost their sharpness 

if you would contribute to my happiness give way my dear to your own 
and to the cheerful prospects before you 

you will think very meanly of your clarissa if you do not believe that
the greatest pleasure she can receive in this life is in your prosperity
and welfare think not of me my only friend but as we were in times
past and suppose me gone a great great way off a long journey how
often are the dearest of friends at their country's call thus parted 
with a certainty for years with a probability for ever 

love me still however but let it be with a weaning love i am not what
i was when we were inseparable lovers as i may say our views must now
be different resolve my dear to make a worthy man happy because a
worthy man make you so and so my dearest love for the present adieu 
 adieu my dearest love but i shall soon write again i hope 



letter xxvi

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
 in answer to letter xxiii of this volume  
thurday july 20 


i read that part of your conclusion to poor belton where you inquire
after him and mention how merrily you and the reset pass your time at
m hall he fetched a deep sigh you are all very happy were his words 
 i am sorry they were his words for poor fellow he is going very
fast change of air he hopes will mend him joined to the cheerful
company i have left him in but nothing i dare say will 

a consuming malady and a consuming mistress to an indulgent keeper are
dreadful things to struggle with both together violence must be used to
get rid of the latter and yet he has not spirit enough left him to exert
himself his house is thomasine's house not his he has not been
within his doors for a fortnight past vagabonding about from inn to
inn entering each for a bait only and staying two or three days without
power to remove and hardly knowing which to go to next his malady is
within him and he cannot run away from it 

her boys once he thought them his are sturdy enough to shoulder him in
his own house as they pass by him siding with the mother they in a
manner expel him and in his absence riot away on the remnant of his
broken fortunes as to their mother who was once so tender so
submissive so studious to oblige that we all pronounced him happy and
his course of life the eligible she is now so termagant so insolent 
that he cannot contend with her without doing infinite prejudice to his
health a broken-spirited defensive hardly a defensive therefore 
reduced to and this to a heart for so many years waging offensive war 
 not valuing whom the opponent what a reduction now comparing himself
to the superannuated lion in the fable kicked in the jaws and laid
sprawling by the spurning heel of an ignoble ass 

i have undertaken his cause he has given me leave yet not without
reluctance to put him into possession of his own house and to place in
it for him his unhappy sister whom he has hitherto slighted because
unhappy it is hard he told me and wept poor fellow when he said
it that he cannot be permitted to die quietly in his own house the
fruits of blessed keeping these 

though but lately apprized of her infidelity it now comes out to have
been of so long continuance that he has no room to believe the boys to
be his yet how fond did he use to be of them 

to what lovelace shall we attribute the tenderness which a reputed
father frequently shows to the children of another man what is that i
pray thee which we call nature and natural affection and what has man
to boast of as to sagacity and penetration when he is as easily brought
to cover and rear and even to love and often to prefer the product of
another's guilt with his wife or mistress as a hen or a goose the eggs 
and even young of others of their kind 

nay let me ask if instinct as it is called in the animal creation 
does not enable them to distinguish their own much more easily than we 
with our boasted reason and sagacity in this nice particular can do 

if some men who have wives but of doubtful virtue considered this
matter duly i believe their inordinate ardour after gain would be a good
deal cooled when they could not be certain though their mates could 
for whose children they were elbowing bustling griping and perhaps
cheating those with whom they have concerns whether friends 
neighbours or more certain next-of-kin by the mother's side however 

but i will not push this notion so far as it might be carried because 
if propagated it might be of unsocial or unnatural consequence since
women of virtue would perhaps be more liable to suffer by the mistrusts
and caprices or bad-hearted and foolish-headed husbands than those who
can screen themselves from detection by arts and hypocrisy to which a
woman of virtue cannot have recourse and yet were this notion duly and
generally considered it might be attended with no bad effects as good
education good inclinations and established virtue would be the
principally-sought-after qualities and not money when a man not
biased by mere personal attractions was looking round him for a partner
in his fortunes and for a mother of his future children which are to be
the heirs of his possessions and to enjoy the fruits of his industry 

but to return to poor belton 

if i have occasion for your assistance and that of our compeers in
re-instating the poor fellow i will give you notice mean time i have
just now been told that thomasine declares she will not stir for it
seems she suspects that measures will be fallen upon to make her quit 
she is mrs belton she says and will prove her marriage 

if she would give herself these airs in his life-time what would she
attempt to do after his death 

her boy threatens any body who shall presume to insult their mother 
their father as they call poor belton they speak of as an unnatural
one and their probably true father is for ever there hostilely there 
passing for her cousin as usual now her protecting cousin 

hardly ever i dare say was there a keeper that did not make
keeperess who lavished away on her kept-fellow what she obtained from
the extravagant folly of him who kept her 

i will do without you if i can the case will be only as i conceive 
that like of the ancient sarmatians their wives then in possession of
their slaves so that they had to contend not only with those wives 
conscious of their infidelity and with their slaves but with the
children of those slaves grown up to manhood resolute to defend their
mothers and their long-manumitted fathers but the noble sarmatians 
scorning to attack their slaves with equal weapons only provided
themselves with the same sort of whips with which they used formerly to
chastise them and attacking them with them the miscreants fled before
them in memory of which to this day the device on the coin in
novogrod in russia a city of the antient sarmatia is a man on
horseback with a whip in his hand 

the poor fellow takes it ill that you did not press him more than you
did to be of your party at m hall it is owing to mowbray he is sure 
that he had so very slight an invitation from one whose invitations used
to be so warm 

mowbray's speech to him he says he never will forgive why tom  said
the brutal fellow with a curse thou droopest like a pip or
roup-cloaking chicken thou shouldst grow perter or submit to a
solitary quarantine if thou wouldst not infect the whole brood 

for my own part only that this poor fellow is in distress as well in
his affairs as in his mind or i should be sick of you all such is the
relish i have of the conversation and such my admiration of the
deportment and sentiments of this divine lady that i would forego a
month even of thy company to be admitted into her's but for one hour 
and i am highly in conceit with myself greatly as i used to value thine 
for being able spontaneously as i may say to make this preference 

it is after all a devilish life we have lived and to consider how it
all ends in a very few years to see to what a state of ill health this
poor fellow is so soon reduced and then to observe how every one of ye
run away from the unhappy being as rats from a falling house is fine
comfort to help a man to look back upon companions ill-chosen and a life
mis-spent 

it will be your turns by-and-by every man of ye if the justice of your
country interpose not 

thou art the only rake we have herded with if thou wilt not except
thyself who hast preserved entire thy health and thy fortunes 

mowbray indeed is indebted to a robust constitution that he has not yet
suffered in his health but his estate is dwindled away year by year 

three-fourths of tourville's very considerable fortunes are already
dissipated and the remaining fourth will probably soon go after the
other three 

poor belton we see how it is with him his own felicity is that he
will hardly live to want 

thou art too proud and too prudent ever to be destitute and to do
thee justice hath a spirit to assist such of thy friends as may be
reduced and wilt if thou shouldest then be living but i think thou
must much sooner than thou imaginest be called to thy account knocked
on the head perhaps by the friends of those whom thou hast injured for
if thou escapest this fate from the harlowe family thou wilt go on
tempting danger and vengeance till thou meetest with vengeance and
this whether thou marriest or not for the nuptial life will not i
doubt till age join with it cure thee of that spirit for intrigue which
is continually running away with thee in spite of thy better sense and
transitory resolutions 

well then i will suppose thee laid down quietly among thy worthier
ancestors 

and now let me look forward to the ends of tourville and mowbray  belton
will be crumbled into dust before thee perhaps   supposing thy early
exit has saved thee from gallows intervention 

reduced probably by riotous waste to consequential want behold them
refuged in some obscene hole or garret obliged to the careless care of
some dirty old woman whom nothing but her poverty prevails upon to
attend to perform the last offices for men who have made such shocking
ravage among the young ones 

then how miserably will they whine through squeaking organs their big
voices turned into puling pity-begging lamentations their now-offensive
paws how helpless then their now-erect necks then denying support to
their aching heads those globes of mischief dropping upon their quaking
shoulders then what wry faces will they make their hearts and their
heads reproaching each other distended their parched mouths sunk
their unmuscled cheeks dropt their under jaws each grunting like the
swine he had resembled in his life oh what a vile wretch have i been 
oh that i had my life to come over again confessing to the poor old
woman who cannot shrive them imaginary ghosts of deflowered virgins 
and polluted matrons flitting before their glassy eyes and old satan 
to their apprehensions grinning behind a looking-glass held up before
them to frighten them with the horror visible in their own countenances 

for my own part if i can get some good family to credit me with a sister
or daughter as i have now an increased fortune which will enable me to
propose handsome settlements i will desert ye all marry and live a
life of reason rather than a life of a brute for the time to come 



letter xxvii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
thursday night 


i was forced to take back my twenty guineas how the women managed it i
can't tell i suppose they too readily found a purchaser for the rich
suit but she mistrusted that i was the advancer of the money and
would not let the clothes go but mrs lovick has actually sold for
fifteen guineas some rich lace worth three times the sum out of which
she repaid her the money she borrowed for fees to the doctor in an
illness occasioned by the barbarity of the most savage of men thou
knowest his name 

the doctor called on her in the morning it seems and had a short debate
with her about fees she insisted that he should take one every time he
came write or not write mistrusting that he only gave verbal directions
to mrs lovick or the nurse to avoid taking any 

he said that it would be impossible for him had he not been a physician 
to forbear inquiries after the health and welfare of so excellent a
person he had not the thought of paying her a compliment in declining
the offered fee but he knew her case could not so suddenly vary as to
demand his daily visits she must permit him therefore to inquire of
the women below after her health and he must not think of coming up if
he were to be pecuniarily rewarded for the satisfaction he was so
desirous to give himself 

it ended in a compromise for a fee each other time which she unwillingly
submitted to telling him that though she was at present desolate and in
disgrace yet her circumstances were of right high and no expenses
could rise so as to be scrupled whether she lived or died but she
submitted she added to the compromise in hopes to see him as often as
he had opportunity for she really looked upon him and mr goddard from
their kind and tender treatment of her with a regard next to filial 

i hope thou wilt make thyself acquainted with this worthy doctor when
thou comest to town and give him thy thanks for putting her into
conceit with the sex that thou hast given her so much reason to execrate 

farewell 


letter xxviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
m hall friday july 21 


just returned from an interview with this hickman a precise fop of a
fellow as starched as his ruffles 

thou knowest i love him not jack and whom we love not we cannot allow a
merit to perhaps not the merit they should be granted however i am in
earnest when i say that he seems to me to be so set so prim so
affected so mincing yet so clouterly in his person that i dare engage
for thy opinion if thou dost justice to him and to thyself that thou
never beheldest such another except in a pier-glass 

i'll tell thee how i play'd him off 

he came in his own chariot to dormer's and we took a turn in the garden 
at his request he was devilish ceremonious and made a bushel of
apologies for the freedom he was going to take and after half a hundred
hums and haws told me that he came that he came to wait on me at the
request of dear miss howe on the account on the account of miss
harlowe 

well sir speak on said i but give me leave to say that if your book
be as long as your preface it will take up a week to read it 

this was pretty rough thou'lt say but there's nothing like balking
these formalities at first when they are put out of their road they
are filled with doubts of themselves and can never get into it again so
that an honest fellow impertinently attacked as i was has all the game
in his own hand quite through the conference 

he stroked his chin and hardly knew what to say at last after
parenthesis within parenthesis apologizing for apologies in imitation 
i suppose of swift's digression in praise of digressions i presume i
presume sir you were privy to the visit made to miss howe by the young
ladies your cousins in the name of lord m and lady sarah sadleir and
lady betty lawrance 

i was sir and miss howe had a letter afterwards signed by his lordship
and by those ladies and underwritten by myself have you seen it sir 

i can't say but i have it is the principal cause of this visit for
miss howe thinks your part of it is written with such an air of levity 
pardon me sir that she knows not whether you are in earnest or not in
your address to her for her interest to her friend 


 see mr lovelace's billet to miss howe letter xiv of this volume 


will miss howe permit me to explain myself in person to her mr hickman 

o sir by no means miss howe i am sure would not give you that
trouble 

i should not think it a trouble i will most readily attend you sir to
miss howe and satisfy her in all her scruples come sir i will wait
upon you now you have a chariot are alone we can talk as we ride 

he hesitated wriggled winced stroked his ruffles set his wig and
pulled his neckcloth which was long enough for a bib i am not going
directly back to miss howe sir it will be as well if you will be so
good as to satisfy miss howe by me 

what is it she scruples mr hickman 

why sir miss howe observes that in your part of the letter you say 
but let me see sir i have a copy of what you wrote  pulling it out  
will you give me leave sir thus you begin dear miss howe 

no offence i hope mr hickman 

none in the least sir none at all sir taking aim as it were to
read 

do you use spectacles mr hickman 

spectacles sir his whole broad face lifted up at me spectacles what
makes you ask me such a question such a young man as i use spectacles 
sir 

they do in spain mr hickman young as well as old to save their eyes 
 have you ever read prior's alma mr hickman 

i have sir custom is every thing in nations as well as with
individuals i know the meaning of your question but tis not the
english custom 

was you ever in spain mr hickman 

no sir i have been in holland 

in holland sir never to france or italy i was resolved to travel
with him into the land of puzzledom 

no sir i cannot say i have as yet 

that's a wonder sir when on the continent 

i went on a particular affair i was obliged to return soon 

well sir you was going to read pray be pleased to proceed 

again he took aim as if his eyes were older than the rest of him and
read after what is written above and signed by names and characters of
such unquestionable honour to be sure taking off his eye nobody
questions the honour of lord m nor that of the good ladies who signed
the letter 

i hope mr hickman nobody questions mine neither 

if you please sir i will read on i might have been excused signing a
name almost as hateful to myself  you are pleased to say  as i know it
is to you 

well mr hickman i must interrupt you at this place in what i wrote
to miss howe i distinguished the word know i had a reason for it 
miss howe has been very free with my character i have never done her
any harm i take it very ill of her and i hope sir you come in her
name to make excuses for it 

miss howe sir is a very polite young lady she is not accustomed to
treat any man's character unbecomingly 

then i have the more reason to take it amiss mr hickman 

why sir you know the friendship 

no friendship should warrant such freedoms as miss howe has taken with my
character 

 i believed he began to wish he had not come near me he seemed quite
disconcerted 

have you not heard miss howe treat my name with great 

sir i come not to offend or affront you but you know what a love there
is between miss howe and miss harlowe i doubt sir you have not
treated miss harlowe as so fine a young lady deserved to be treated and
if love for her friend has made miss howe take freedoms as you call
them a mind not ungenerous on such an occasion will rather be sorry
for having given the cause than 

i know your consequence sir but i'd rather have this reproof from a
lady than from a gentleman i have a great desire to wait upon miss
howe i am persuaded we should soon come to a good understanding 
generous minds are always of kin i know we should agree in every thing 
pray mr hickman be so kind as to introduce me to miss howe 

sir i can signify your desire if you please to miss howe 

do so be pleased to read on mr hickman 

he did very formally as if i remembered not what i had written and when
he came to the passage about the halter the parson and the hangman 
reading it why sir says he does not this look like a jest miss howe
thinks it does it is not in the lady's power you know sir to doom
you to the gallows 

then if it were mr hickman you think she would 

you say here to miss howe proceeded he that miss harlowe is the most
injured of her sex i know from miss howe that she highly resents the
injuries you own insomuch that miss howe doubts that she shall never
prevail upon her to overlook them and as your family are all desirous
you should repair her wrongs and likewise desire miss howe's
interposition with her friend miss howe fears from this part of your
letter that you are too much in jest and that your offer to do her
justice is rather in compliment to your friends' entreaties than
proceeding form your own inclinations and she desires to know your true
sentiments on this occasion before she interposes further 

do you think mr hickman that if i am capable of deceiving my own
relations i have so much obligation to miss howe who has always treated
me with great freedom as to acknowledge to her what i don't to them 

sir i beg pardon but miss howe thinks that as you have written to her 
she may ask you by me for an explanation of what you have written 

you see mr hickman something of me do you think i am in jest or in
earnest 

i see sir you are a gay gentleman of fine spirits and all that all
i beg in miss howe's name is to know if you really and bona fide join
with your friends in desiring her to use her interest to reconcile you to
miss harlowe 

i should be extremely glad to be reconciled to miss harlowe and should
owe great obligations to miss howe if she could bring about so happy an
event 

well sir and you have no objections to marriage i presume as the
condition of that reconciliation 

i never liked matrimony in my life i must be plain with you mr 
hickman 

i am sorry for it i think it a very happy state 

i hope you will find it so mr hickman 

i doubt not but i shall sir and i dare say so would you if you were
to have miss harlowe 

if i could be happy in it with any body it would be with miss harlowe 

i am surprised sir then after all you don't think of marrying miss
harlowe after the hard usage 

what hard usage mr hickman i don't doubt but a lady of her niceness
has represented what would appear trifles to any other in a very strong
light 

if what i have had hinted to me sir excuse me had been offered to the
lady she has more than trifles to complain of 

let me know what you have heard mr hickman i will very truly answer
to the accusations 

sir you know best what you have done you own the lady is the most
injured as well as the most deserving of her sex 

i do sir and yet i would be glad to know what you have heard for on
that perhaps depends my answer to the questions miss howe puts to me by
you 

why then sir since you ask it you cannot be displeased if i answer
you in the first place sir you will acknowledge i suppose that you
promised miss harlowe marriage and all that 

well sir and i suppose what you have to charge me with is that i was
desirous to have all that without marriage 

cot-so sir i know you are deemed to be a man of wit but may i not ask
if these things sit not too light upon you 

when a thing is done and cannot be helped tis right to make the best
of it i wish the lady would think so too 

i think sir ladies should not be deceived i think a promise to a lady
should be as binding as to any other person at the least 

i believe you think so mr hickman and i believe you are a very honest 
good sort of a man 

i would always keep my word sir whether to man or woman 

you say well and far be it from me to persuade you to do otherwise 
but what have you farther heard 

 thou wilt think jack i must be very desirous to know in what light my
elected spouse had represented things to miss howe and how far miss howe
had communicated them to mr hickman 

sir this is no part of my present business 

but mr hickman tis part of mine i hope you would not expect that i
should answer your questions at the same time that you refused to answer
mine what pray have you farther heard 

why then sir if i must say i am told that miss harlowe was carried to
a very bad house 

why indeed the people did not prove so good as they should be what
farther have you heard 

i have heard sir that the lady had strange advantages taken of her 
very unfair ones but what i cannot say 

and cannot you say cannot you guess then i'll tell you sir perhaps
some liberty was taken with her when she was asleep do you think no
lady ever was taken at such an advantage you know mr hickman that
ladies are very shy of trusting themselves with the modestest of our sex 
when they are disposed to sleep and why so if they did not expect that
advantages would be taken of them at such times 

but sir had not the lady something given her to make her sleep 

ay mr hickman that's the question i want to know if the lady says she
had 

i have not seen all she has written but by what i have heard it is a
very black affair excuse me sir 

i do excuse you mr hickman but supposing it were so do you think a
lady was never imposed upon by wine or so do you not think the most
cautious woman in the world might not be cheated by a stronger liquor for
a smaller when she was thirsty after a fatigue in this very warm
weather and do you think if she was thus thrown into a profound sleep 
that she is the only lady that was ever taken at such an advantage 

even as you make it mr lovelace this matter is not a light one but i
fear it is a great deal heavier than as you put it 

what reasons have you to fear this sir what has the lady said pray
let me know i have reason to be so earnest 

why sir miss howe herself knows not the whole the lady promises to
give her all the particulars at a proper time if she lives but has said
enough to make it out to be a very bad affair 

i am glad miss harlowe has not yet given all the particulars and since
she has not you may tell miss howe from me that neither she nor any
woman in the world can be more virtuous than miss harlowe is to this
hour as to her own mind tell her that i hope she never will know the
particulars but that she has been unworthily used tell her that though
i know not what she has said yet i have such an opinion of her veracity 
that i would blindly subscribe to the truth of every tittle of it though
it make me ever so black tell her that i have but three things to
blame her for one that she won't give me an opportunity of repairing
her wrongs the second that she is so ready to acquaint every body with
what she has suffered that it will put it out of my power to redress
those wrongs with any tolerable reputation to either of us will this 
mr hickman answer any part of the intention of this visit 

why sir this is talking like a man of honour i own but you say there
is a third thing you blame the lady for may i ask what that is 

i don't know sir whether i ought to tell it you or not perhaps you
won't believe it if i do but though the lady will tell the truth and
nothing but the truth yet perhaps she will not tell the whole truth 

pray sir but it mayn't be proper yet you give me great curiosity 
sure there is no misconduct in the lady i hope there is not i am
sure if miss howe did not believe her to be faultless in every
particular she would not interest herself so much in her favour as she
does dearly as she loves her 

i love miss harlowe too well mr hickman to wish to lessen her in miss
howe's opinion especially as she is abandoned of every other friend 
but perhaps it would hardly be credited if i should tell you 

i should be very sorry sir and so would miss howe if this poor lady's
conduct had laid her under obligation to you for this reserve you have
so much the appearance of a gentleman as well as are so much
distinguished in your family and fortunes that i hope you are incapable
of loading such a young lady as this in order to lighten yourself 
excuse me sir 

i do i do mr hickman you say you came not with any intention to
affront me i take freedom and i give it i should be very loth i
repeat to say any thing that may weaken miss harlowe in the good opinion
of the only friend she thinks she has left 

it may not be proper said he for me to know your third article against
this unhappy lady but i never heard of any body out of her own
implacable family that had the least doubt of her honour mrs howe 
indeed once said after a conference with one of her uncles that she
feared all was not right on her side but else i never heard 

oons sir in a fierce tone and with an erect mien stopping short upon
him which made him start back tis next to blasphemy to question this
lady's honour she is more pure than a vestal for vestals have often
been warmed by their own fires no age from the first to the present 
ever produced nor will the future to the end of the world i dare aver 
ever produce a young blooming lady tried as she has been tried who has
stood all trials as she has done let me tell you sir that you never
saw never knew never heard of such another woman as miss harlowe 

sir sir i beg your pardon far be it from me to question the lady 
you have not heard me say a word that could be so construed i have the
utmost honour for her miss howe loves her as she loves her own soul 
and that she would not do if she were not sure she were as virtuous as
herself 

as herself sir i have a high opinion of miss howe sir but i dare
say 

what sir dare you say of miss howe i hope sir you will not presume
to say any thing to the disparagement of miss howe 

presume mr hickman that is presuming language let me tell you mr 
hickman 

the occasion for it mr lovelace if designed is presuming if you
please i am not a man ready to take offence sir especially where i am
employed as a mediator but no man breathing shall say disparaging
things of miss howe in my hearing without observation 

well said mr hickman i dislike not your spirit on such a supposed
occasion but what i was going to say is this that there is not in my
opinion a woman in the world who ought to compare herself with miss
clarissa harlowe till she has stood her trials and has behaved under
them and after them as she has done you see sir i speak against
myself you see i do for libertine as i am thought to be i never
will attempt to bring down the measures of right and wrong to the
standard of my actions 

why sir this is very right it is very noble i will say but tis
pity that the man who can pronounce so fine a sentence will not square
his actions accordingly 

that mr hickman is another point we all err in some things i wish
not that miss howe should have miss harlowe's trials and i rejoice that
she is in no danger of any such from so good a man 

 poor hickman he looked as if he knew not whether i meant a compliment
or a reflection 

but proceeded i since i find that i have excited your curiosity that
you may not go away with a doubt that may be injurious to the most
admirable of women i am enclined to hint to you what i have in the third
place to blame her for 

sir as you please it may not be proper 

it cannot be very improper mr hickman so let me ask you what would
miss howe think if her friend is the more determined against me because
she thinks to revenge to me i verily believe that of encouraging
another lover 

how sir sure this cannot be the case i can tell you sir if miss
howe thought this she would not approve of it at all for little as you
think miss howe likes you sir and little as she approves of your
actions by her friend i know she is of opinion that she ought to have
nobody living but you and should continue single all her life if she be
not your's 

revenge and obstinacy mr hickman will make women the best of them do
very unaccountable things rather than not put out both eyes of a man
they are offended with they will give up one of their own 

i don't know what to say to this sir but sure she cannot encourage any
other person's address so soon too why sir she is as we are told 
so ill and so weak 

not in resentment weak i'll assure you i am well acquainted with all
her movements and i tell you believe it or not that she refuses me in
view of another lover 

can it be 

tis true by my soul has she not hinted this to miss howe do you
think 

no indeed sir if she had i should not have troubled you at this time
from miss howe 

well then you see i am right that though she cannot be guilty of a
falsehood yet she has not told her friend the whole truth 

what shall a man say to these things looking most stupidly perplexed 

say say mr hickman who can account for the workings and ways of a
passionate and offended woman endless would be the histories i could
give you within my own knowledge of the dreadful effects of woman's
passionate resentments and what that sex will do when disappointed 

there was miss dorrington  perhaps you know her not   who run away with
her father's groom because he would not let her have a half-pay officer 
with whom her passions all up she fell in love at first sight as he
accidentally passed under her window 

there was miss savage she married her mother's coachman because her
mother refused her a journey to wales in apprehension that miss intended
to league herself with a remote cousin of unequal fortunes of whom she
was not a little fond when he was a visiting-guest at their house for a
week 

there was the young widow sanderson who believing herself slighted by a
younger brother of a noble family sarah stout like took it into her
head to drown herself 

miss sally anderson  you have heard of her no doubt   being checked by
her uncle for encouraging an address beneath her in spite threw herself
into the arms of an ugly dog a shoe-maker's apprentice running away
with him in a pair of shoes he had just fitted to her feet though she
never saw the fellow before and hated him ever after and at last took
laudanum to make her forget for ever her own folly 

but can there be a stronger instance in point than what the unaccountable
resentments of such a lady as miss clarissa harlowe afford us who at
this instant ill as she is not only encourages but in a manner makes
court to one of the most odious dogs that ever was seen i think miss
howe should not be told this and yet she ought too in order to dissuade
her from such a preposterous rashness 

o fie o strange miss howe knows nothing of this to be sure she
won't look upon her if this be true 

tis true very true mr hickman true as i am here to tell you so 
and he is an ugly fellow too uglier to look at than me 

than you sir why to be sure you are one of the handsomest men in
england 

well but the wretch she so spitefully prefers to me is a mis-shapen 
meagre varlet more like a skeleton than a man then he dresses you
never saw a devil so bedizened hardly a coat to his back nor a shoe
to his foot a bald-pated villain yet grudges to buy a peruke to his
baldness for he is as covetous as hell never satisfied yet plaguy
rich 

why sir there is some joke in this surely a man of common parts
knows not how to take such gentleman as you but sir if there be any
truth in the story what is he some jew or miserly citizen i suppose 
that may have presumed on the lady's distressful circumstances and your
lively wit points him out as it pleases 

why the rascal has estates in every county in england and out of
england too 

some east india governor i suppose if there be any thing in it the
lady once had thoughts of going abroad but i fancy all this time you
are in jest sir if not we must surely have heard of him 

heard of him aye sir we have all heard of him but none of us care to
be intimate with him except this lady and that as i told you in spite
of me his name in short is death death sir stamping and speaking
loud and full in his ears which made him jump half a yard high 

 thou never beheldest any man so disconcerted he looked as if the
frightful skeleton was before him and he had not his accounts ready 
when a little recovered he fribbled with his waistcoat buttons as if he
had been telling his beads 

this sir proceeded i is her wooer nay she is so forward a girl 
that she wooes him but i hope it never will be a match 

he had before behaved and now looked with more spirit than i expected
from him 

i came sir said he as a mediator of differences it behoves me to
keep my temper but sir and turned short upon me as much as i love
peace and to promote it i will not be ill-used 

as i had played so much upon him it would have been wrong to take him at
his more than half-menace yet i think i owe him a grudge for his
presuming to address miss howe 

you mean no defiance i presume mr hickman any more than i do offence 
on that presumption i ask your excuse but this is my way i mean no
harm i cannot let sorrow touch my heart i cannot be grave six minutes
together for the blood of me i am a descendant of old chancellor
moore i believe and should not forbear to cut a joke were i upon the
scaffold but you may gather from what i have said that i prefer miss
harlowe and that upon the justest grounds to all the women in the
world and i wonder that there should be any difficulty to believe from
what i have signed and from what i have promised to my relations and
enabled them to promise for me that i should be glad to marry that
excellent creature upon her own terms i acknowledge to you mr 
hickman that i have basely injured her if she will honour me with her
hand i declare that is my intention to make her the best of husbands 
but nevertheless i must say that if she goes on appealing her case and
exposing us both as she does it is impossible to think the knot can be
knit with reputation to either and although mr hickman i have
delivered my apprehensions under so ludicrous a figure i am afraid that
she will ruin her constitution and by seeking death when she may shun
him will not be able to avoid him when she would be glad to do so 

this cool and honest speech let down his stiffened muscles into
complacence he was my very obedient and faithful humble servant several
times over as i waited on him to his chariot and i was his almost as
often 

and so exit hickman 



letter xxix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
 in answer to letters xxii xxvi xxvii of this volume  
friday night july 21 


i will throw away a few paragraphs upon the contents of thy last shocking
letters just brought me and send what i shall write by the fellow who
carries mine on the interview with hickman 

reformation i see is coming fast upon thee thy uncle's slow death 
and thy attendance upon him through every stage towards it prepared thee
for it but go thou on in thine own way as i will in mine happiness
consists in being pleased with what we do and if thou canst find delight
in being sad it will be as well for thee as if thou wert merry though
no other person should join to keep thee in countenance 

i am nevertheless exceedingly disturbed at the lady's ill health it
is entirely owing to the cursed arrest she was absolutely triumphant
over me and the whole crew before thou believest me guiltless of that 
so i hope does she the rest as i have often said is a common case 
only a little uncommonly circumstanced that's all why then all these
severe things from her and from thee 

as to selling her clothes and her laces and so forth it has i own a
shocking sound to it what an implacable as well as unjust set of
wretches are those of her unkindredly kin who have money of her's in
their hands as well as large arrears of her own estate yet with-hold
both avowedly to distress her but may she not have money of that proud
and saucy friend of her's miss howe more than she wants and should
not i be overjoyed thinkest thou to serve her what then is there in
the parting with her apparel but female perverseness and i am not sure 
whether i ought not to be glad if she does this out of spite to me 
some disappointed fair-ones would have hanged some drowned themselves 
my beloved only revenges herself upon her clothes different ways of
working has passion in different bosoms as humours or complexion induce 
 besides dost think i shall grudge to replace to three times the
value what she disposes of so jack there is no great matter in this 

thou seest how sensible she is of the soothings of the polite doctor 
this will enable thee to judge how dreadfully the horrid arrest and her
gloomy father's curse must have hurt her i have great hope if she
will but see me that my behaviour my contrition my soothings may have
some happy effect upon her 

but thou art too ready to give up let me seriously tell thee that all
excellence as she is i think the earnest interposition of my relations 
the implored mediation of that little fury miss howe and the commissions
thou actest under from myself are such instances of condescension and
high value in them and such contrition in me that nothing farther can
be done so here let the matter rest for the present till she considers
better of it 

but now a few words upon poor belton's case i own i was at first a
little startled at the disloyalty of his thomasine her hypocrisy to be
for so many years undetected i have very lately had some intimations
given me of her vileness and had intended to mention them to thee when i
saw thee to say the truth i always suspected her eye the eye thou
knowest is the casement at which the heart generally looks out many
a woman who will not show herself at the door has tipt the sly the
intelligible wink from the windows 

but tom had no management at all a very careless fellow would never
look into his own affairs the estate his uncle left him was his ruin 
wife or mistress whoever was must have had his fortune to sport with 

i have often hinted his weakness of this sort to him and the danger he
was in of becoming the property of designing people but he hated to
take pains he would ever run away from his accounts as now poor
fellow he would be glad to do from himself had he not had a woman to
fleece him his coachman or valet would have been his prime-minister 
and done it as effectually 

but yet for many years i thought she was true to his bed at least i
thought the boys were his own for though they are muscular and
big-boned yet i supposed the healthy mother might have furnished them
with legs and shoulders for she is not of a delicate frame and then
tom some years ago looked up and spoke more like a man than he has
done of late squeaking inwardly poor fellow for some time past from
contracted quail-pipes and wheezing from lungs half spit away 

he complains thou sayest that we all run away from him why after
all belford it is no pleasant thing to see a poor fellow one loves 
dying by inches yet unable to do him good there are friendships which
are only bottle-deep i should be loth to have it thought that mine for
any of my vassals is such a one yet with gay hearts which become
intimate because they were gay the reason for their first intimacy
ceasing the friendship will fade but may not this sort of friendship be
more properly distinguished by the word companionship 

but mine as i said is deeper than this i would still be as ready as
ever i was in my life to the utmost of my power to do him service 

as once instance of this my readiness to extricate him from all his
difficulties as to thomasine dost thou care to propose to him an
expedient that is just come into my head 

it is this i would engage thomasine and her cubs if belton be convinced
they are neither of them his in a party of pleasure she was always
complaisant to me it should be in a boat hired for the purpose to
sail to tilbury to the isle shepey or pleasuring up the medway and
tis but contriving to turn the boat bottom upward i can swim like a
fish another boat shall be ready to take up whom i should direct for
fear of the worst and then if tom has a mind to be decent one suit of
mourning will serve for all three nay the hostler-cousin may take his
plunge from the steerage and who knows but they may be thrown up on the
beach thomasine and he hand in hand 

this thou'lt say is no common instance of friendship 

mean time do thou prevail on him to come down to us he never was more
welcome in his life than he shall be now if he will not let him find
me some other service and i will clap a pair of wings to my shoulders 
and he shall see me come flying in at his windows at the word of command 

mowbray and tourville each intend to give thee a letter and i leave to
those rough varlets to handle thee as thou deservest for the shocking
picture thou hast drawn of their last ends thy own past guilt has
stared thee full in the face one may see by it and made thee in
consciousness of thy demerits sketch out these cursed out-lines i am
glad thou hast got the old fiend to hold the glass before thy own face
so soon thou must be in earnest surely when thou wrotest it and have
severe conviction upon thee for what a hardened varlet must he be who
could draw such a picture as this in sport 


 see letter xxvi of this volume 


as for thy resolution of repenting and marrying i would have thee
consider which thou wilt set about first if thou wilt follow my advice 
thou shalt make short work of it let matrimony take place of the other 
for then thou wilt very possibly have repentance come tumbling in fast
upon thee as a consequence and so have both in one 



letter xxx

mr belford to mr robert lovelace esq 
friday noon july 21 


this morning i was admitted as soon as i sent up my name into the
presence of the divine lady such i may call her as what i have to
relate will fully prove 

she had had a tolerable night and was much better in spirits though
weak in person and visibly declining in looks 

mrs lovick and mrs smith were with her and accused her in a gentle
manner of having applied herself too assiduously to her pen for her
strength having been up ever since five she said she had rested
better than she had done for many nights she had found her spirits free 
and her mind tolerably easy and having as she had reason to think but
a short time and much to do in it she must be a good housewife of her
hours 

she had been writing she said a letter to her sister but had not
pleased herself in it though she had made two or three essays but that
the last must go 

by hints i had dropt from time to time she had reason she said to
think that i knew every thing that concerned her and her family and if
so must be acquainted with the heavy curse her father had laid upon her 
which had been dreadfully fulfilled in one part as to her prospects in
this life and that in a very short time which gave her great
apprehensions of the other part she had been applying herself to her
sister to obtain a revocation of it i hope my father will revoke it 
said she or i shall be very miserable yet  and she gasped as she spoke 
with apprehension  i am ready to tremble at what the answer may be for
my sister is hard-hearted 

i said something reflecting upon her friends as to what they would
deserve to be thought of if the unmerited imprecation were not
withdrawn upon which she took me up and talked in such a dutiful
manner of her parents as must doubly condemn them if they remain
implacable for their inhuman treatment of such a daughter 

she said i must not blame her parents it was her dear miss howe's fault
to do so but what an enormity was there in her crime which could set
the best of parents they had been to her till she disobliged them in a
bad light for resenting the rashness of a child from whose education
they had reason to expect better fruits there were some hard
circumstances in her case it was true but my friend could tell me that
no one person throughout the whole fatal transaction had acted out of
character but herself she submitted therefore to the penalty she had
incurred if they had any fault it was only that they would not inform
themselves of such circumstances which would alleviate a little her
misdeed and that supposing her a more guilty creature than she was they
punished her without a hearing 

lord i was going to curse thee lovelace how every instance of
excellence in this all excelling creature condemns thee thou wilt
have reason to think thyself of all men the most accursed if she die 

i then besought her while she was capable of such glorious instances of
generosity and forgiveness to extend her goodness to a man whose heart
bled in every vein of it for the injuries he had done her and who would
make it the study of his whole life to repair them 

the women would have withdrawn when the subject became so particular 
but she would not permit them to go she told me that if after this
time i was for entering with so much earnestness into a subject so very
disagreeable to her my visits must not be repeated nor was there
occasion she said for my friendly offices in your favour since she
had begun to write her whole mind upon that subject to miss howe in
answer to letters from her in which miss howe urged the same arguments 
in compliment to the wishes of your noble and worthy relations 

mean time you may let him know said she that i reject him with my
whole heart yet that although i say this with such a determination as
shall leave no room for doubt i say it not however with passion on the
contrary tell him that i am trying to bring my mind into such a frame
as to be able to pity him  poor perjured wretch what has he not to
answer for   and that i shall not think myself qualified for the state i
am aspiring to if after a few struggles more i cannot forgive him too 
and i hope clasping her hands together uplifted as were her eyes my
dear earthly father will set me the example my heavenly one has already
set us all and by forgiving his fallen daughter teach her to forgive
the man who then i hope will not have destroyed my eternal prospects 
as he has my temporal 

stop here thou wretch but i need not bid thee for i can go no
farther 



letter xxxi

mr belford
 in continuation  


you will imagine how affecting her noble speech and behaviour were to me 
at the time when the bare recollecting and transcribing them obliged me
to drop my pen the women had tears in their eyes i was silent for a
few moments at last matchless excellence inimitable goodness i
called her with a voice so accented that i was half-ashamed of myself 
as it was before the women but who could stand such sublime generosity
of soul in so young a creature her loveliness giving grace to all she
said methinks said i  and i really in a manner involuntarily bent
my knee   i have before me an angel indeed i can hardly forbear
prostration and to beg your influence to draw me after you to the world
you are aspiring to yet but what shall i say only dearest
excellence make me in some small instances serviceable to you that i
may if i survive you have the glory to think i was able to contribute
to your satisfaction while among us 

here i stopt she was silent i proceeded have you no commission to
employ me in deserted as you are by all your friends among strangers 
though i doubt not worthy people cannot i be serviceable by message 
by letter-writing by attending personally with either message or
letter your father your uncles your brother your sister miss howe 
lord m or the ladies his sisters any office to be employed to serve
you absolutely independent of my friend's wishes or of my own wishes
to oblige him think madam if i cannot 

i thank you sir very heartily i thank you but in nothing that i can at
present think of or at least resolve upon can you do me service i
will see what return the letter i have written will bring me till then
 

my life and my fortune interrupted i are devoted to your service 
permit me to observe that here you are without one natural friend and
 so much do i know of your unhappy case that you must be in a manner
destitute of the means to make friends 

she was going to interrupt me with a prohibitory kind of earnestness in
her manner 

i beg leave to proceed madam i have cast about twenty ways how to
mention this before but never dared till now suffer me now that i
have broken the ice to tender myself as your banker only i know you
will not be obliged you need not you have sufficient of your own if
it were in your hands and from that whether you live or die will i
consent to be reimbursed i do assure you that the unhappy man shall
never know either my offer or your acceptance only permit me this small
 

and down behind her chair dropt a bank note of 100  which i had brought
with me intending some how or other to leave it behind me nor shouldst
thou ever have known it had she favoured me with the acceptance of it 
as i told her 

you give me great pain mr belford said she by these instances of your
humanity and yet considering the company i have seen you in i am not
sorry to find you capable of such methinks i am glad for the sake of
human nature that there could be but one such man in the world as he
you and i know but as to your kind offer whatever it be if you take
it not up you will greatly disturb me i have no need of your kindness 
i have effects enough which i never can want to supply my present
occasion and if needful can have recourse to miss howe i have
promised that i would so pray sir urge not upon me this favour take
it up yourself if you mean me peace and ease of mind urge not this
favour and she spoke with impatience 

i beg madam but one word 

not one sir till you have taken back what you have let fall i doubt
not either the honour or the kindness of your offer but you must not
say one word more on this subject i cannot bear it 

she was stooping but with pain i therefore prevented her and besought
her to forgive me for a tender which i saw had been more discomposing
to her than i had hoped from the purity of my intentions it would be 
but i could not bear to think that such a mind as her's should be
distressed since the want of the conveniencies she was used to abound in
might affect and disturb her in the divine course she was in 

you are very kind to me sir said she and very favourable in your
opinion of me but i hope that i cannot now be easily put out of my
present course my declining health will more and more confirm me in it 
those who arrested and confined me no doubt thought they had fallen
upon the most ready method to distress me so as to bring me into all
their measures but i presume to hope that i have a mind that cannot be
debased in essential instances by temporal calamities 

little do those poor wretches know of the force of innate principles 
 forgive my own implied vanity was her word who imagine that a
prison or penury can bring a right-turned mind to be guilty of a wilful
baseness in order to avoid such short-lived evils 

she then turned from me towards the window with a dignity suitable to her
words and such as showed her to be more of soul than of body at that
instant 

what magnanimity no wonder a virtue so solidly founded could baffle all
thy arts and that it forced thee in order to carry thy accursed point 
to have recourse to those unnatural ones which robbed her of her
charming senses 

the women were extremely affected mrs lovick especially who said 
whisperingly to mrs smith we have an angel not a woman with us mrs 
smith 

i repeated my offers to write to any of her friends and told her that 
having taken the liberty to acquaint dr h with the cruel displeasure of
her relations as what i presumed lay nearest to her heart he had
proposed to write himself to acquaint her friends how ill she was if
she would not take it amiss 

it was kind in the doctor she said but begged that no step of that
sort might be taken without her knowledge or consent she would wait to
see what effects her letter to her sister would have all she had to
hope for was that her father would revoke his malediction previous to
the last blessing she should then implore for the rest her friends
would think she could not suffer too much and she was content to suffer 
for now nothing could happen that could make her wish to live 

mrs smith went down and soon returning asked if the lady and i would
not dine with her that day for it was her wedding-day she had engaged
mrs lovick she said and should have nobody else if we would do her
that favour 

the charming creature sighed and shook her head wedding-day repeated
she i wish you mrs smith many happy wedding-days but you will
excuse me 

mr smith came up with the same request they both applied to me 

on condition the lady would i should make no scruple and would suspend
an engagement which i actually had 

she then desired they would all sit down you have several times mrs 
lovick and mrs smith hinted your wishes that i would give you some
little history of myself now if you are at leisure that this
gentleman who i have reason to believe knows it all is present and
can tell you if i give it justly or not i will oblige your curiosity 

they all eagerly the man smith too sat down and she began an account
of herself which i will endeavour to repeat as nearly in her own words
as i possibly can for i know you will think it of importance to be
apprized of her manner of relating your barbarity to her as well as what
her sentiments are of it and what room there is for the hopes your
friends have in your favour for her 

at first when i took these lodgings said she i thought of staying but
a short time in them and so mrs smith i told you i therefore avoided
giving any other account of myself than that i was a very unhappy young
creature seduced from good and escaped from very vile wretches 

this account i thought myself obliged to give that you might the less
wonder at seeing a young creature rushing through your shop into your
back apartment all trembling and out of breath an ordinary garb over my
own craving lodging and protection only giving my bare word that you
should be handsomely paid all my effects contained in a
pocket-handkerchief 

my sudden absence for three days and nights together when arrested 
must still further surprise you and although this gentleman who 
perhaps knows more of the darker part of my story than i do myself has
informed you as you mrs lovick tell me that i am only an unhappy 
not a guilty creature yet i think it incumbent upon me not to suffer
honest minds to be in doubt about my character 

you must know then that i have been in one instance i had like to
have said but in one instance but that was a capital one an undutiful
child to the most indulgent of parents for what some people call cruelty
in them is owing but to the excess of their love and to their
disappointment having had reason to expect better from me 

i was visited at first with my friends connivance by a man of birth
and fortune but of worse principles as it proved than i believed any
man could have my brother a very headstrong young man was absent at
that time and when he returned from an old grudge and knowing the
gentleman it is plain better than i knew him entirely disapproved of
his visits and having a great sway in our family brought other
gentlemen to address me and at last several having been rejected he
introduced one extremely disagreeable in every indifferent person's eyes
disagreeable i could not love him they all joined to compel me to
have him a rencounter between the gentleman my friends were set against 
and my brother having confirmed them all his enemies 

to be short i was confined and treated so very hardly that in a rash
fit i appointed to go off with the man they hated a wicked intention 
you'll say but i was greatly provoked nevertheless i repented and
resolved not to go off with him yet i did not mistrust his honour to me
neither nor his love because nobody thought me unworthy of the latter 
and my fortune was not to be despised but foolishly wickedly and
contrivingly as my friends still think with a design as they imagine 
to abandon them giving him a private meeting i was tricked away poorly
enough tricked away i must needs say though others who had been first
guilty of so rash a step as the meeting of him was might have been so
deceived and surprised as well as i 

after remaining some time at a farm-house in the country and behaving
to me all the time with honour he brought me to handsome lodgings in
town till still better provision could be made for me but they proved
to be as he indeed knew and designed at a vile a very vile creature's 
though it was long before i found her to be so for i knew nothing of the
town or its ways 

there is no repeating what followed such unprecedented vile arts for
i gave him no opportunity to take me at any disreputable advantage  

and here half covering her sweet face with her handkerchief put to her
tearful eyes she stopt 

hastily as if she would fly from the hateful remembrance she resumed 
i made escape afterward from the abominable house in his absence and
came to your's and this gentleman has almost prevailed on me to think 
that the ungrateful man did not connive at the vile arrest which was
made no doubt in order to get me once more to those wicked lodgings 
for nothing do i owe them except i were to pay them'  she sighed and
again wiped her charming eyes adding in a softer lower voice  for
being ruined 

indeed madam said i guilty abominably guilty as he is in all the
rest he is innocent of this last wicked outrage 

well and so i wish him to be that evil heavy as it was is one of
the slightest evils i have suffered but hence you'll observe mrs 
lovick for you seemed this morning curious to know if i were not a
wife that i never was married you mr belford no doubt knew before
that i am no wife and now i never will be one yet i bless god that
i am not a guilty creature 

as to my parentage i am of no mean family i have in my own right by
the intended favour of my grandfather a fortune not contemptible 
independent of my father if i had pleased but i never will please 

my father is very rich i went by another name when i came to you
first but that was to avoid being discovered to the perfidious man who
now engages by this gentleman not to molest me 

my real name you now know to be harlowe clarissa harlowe i am not yet
twenty years of age 

i have an excellent mother as well as father a woman of family and
fine sense worthy of a better child they both doated upon me 

i have two good uncles men of great fortune jealous of the honour of
their family which i have wounded 

i was the joy of their hearts and with theirs and my father's i had
three houses to call my own for they used to have me with them by turns 
and almost kindly to quarrel for me so that i was two months in the year
with the one two months with the other six months at my father's and
two at the houses of others of my dear friends who thought themselves
happy in me and whenever i was at any one's i was crowded upon with
letters by all the rest who longed for my return to them 

in short i was beloved by every body the poor i used to make glad
their hearts i never shut my hand to any distress wherever i was but
now i am poor myself 

so mrs smith so mrs lovick i am not married it is but just to tell
you so and i am now as i ought to be in a state of humiliation and
penitence for the rash step which has been followed by so much evil 
god i hope will forgive me as i am endeavouring to bring my mind to
forgive all the world even the man who has ungratefully and by dreadful
perjuries  poor wretch he thought all his wickedness to be wit  
reduced to this a young creature who had his happiness in her view and
in her wish even beyond this life and who was believed to be of rank 
and fortune and expectations considerable enough to make it the
interest of any gentleman in england to be faithful to his vows to her 
but i cannot expect that my parents will forgive me my refuge must be
death the most painful kind of which i would suffer rather than be the
wife of one who could act by me as the man has acted upon whose birth 
education and honour i had so much reason to found better expectations 

i see continued she that i who once was every one's delight am now
the cause of grief to every one you that are strangers to me are moved
for me tis kind but tis time to stop your compassionate hearts 
mrs smith and mrs lovick are too much touched   for the women sobbed 
and the man was also affected   it is barbarous in me with my woes 
thus to sadden your wedding-day  then turning to mr and mrs smith 
may you see many happy ones honest good couple how agreeable is it
to see you both join so kindly to celebrate it after many years are gone
over you i once but no more all my prospects of felicity as to this
life are at an end my hopes like opening buds or blossoms in an
over-forward spring have been nipt by a severe frost blighted by an
eastern wind but i can but once die and if life be spared me but till
i am discharged from a heavy malediction which my father in his wrath
laid upon me and which is fulfilled literally in every article relating
to this world that and a last blessing are all i have to wish for and
death will be welcomer to me than rest to the most wearied traveller
that ever reached his journey's end 

and then she sunk her head against the back of her chair and hiding her
face with her handkerchief endeavoured to conceal her tears from us 

not a soul of us could speak a word thy presence perhaps thou
hardened wretch might have made us ashamed of a weakness which perhaps
thou wilt deride me in particular for when thou readest this 

she retired to her chamber soon after and was forced it seems to lie
down we all went down together and for an hour and a half dwelt upon
her praises mrs smith and mrs lovick repeatedly expressing their
astonishment that there could be a man in the world capable of
offending much more of wilfully injuring such a lady and repeating 
that they had an angel in their house i thought they had and that
as assuredly as there is a devil under the roof of good lord m 

i hate thee heartily by my faith i do every hour i hate thee more
than the former 

j belford 



letter xxxii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
saturday july 22 


what dost hate me for belford and why more and more have i been
guilty of any offence thou knewest not before if pathos can move such a
heart as thine can it alter facts did i not always do this
incomparable creature as much justice as thou canst do her for the heart
of thee or as she can do herself what nonsense then thy hatred thy
augmented hatred when i still persist to marry her pursuant to word
given to thee and to faith plighted to all my relations but hate if
thou wilt so thou dost but write thou canst not hate me so much as i
do myself and yet i know if thou really hatedst me thou wouldst not
venture to tell me so 

well but after all what need of her history to these women she will
certainly repent some time hence that she has thus needless exposed us
both 

sickness palls every appetite and makes us hate what we loved but
renewed health changes the scene disposes us to be pleased with
ourselves and then we are in a way to be pleased with every one else 
every hope then rises upon us every hour presents itself to us on
dancing feet and what mr addison says of liberty may with still
greater propriety be said of health for what is liberty itself without
health 

 it makes the gloomy face of nature gay 
 gives beauty to the sun and pleasure to the day 

and i rejoice that she is already so much better as to hold with
strangers such a long and interesting conversation 

strange confoundedly strange and as perverse  that is to say womanly 
as strange that she should refuse and sooner choose to die  o the
obscene word and yet how free does thy pen make with it to me   than be
mine who offended her by acting in character while her parents acted
shamefully out of theirs and when i am now willing to act out of my own
to oblige her yet i am not to be forgiven they to be faultless with
her and marriage the only medium to repair all breaches and to salve
her own honour surely thou must see the inconsistence of her forgiving
unforgiveness as i may call it yet heavy varlet as thou art thou
wantest to be drawn up after her and what a figure dost thou make with
thy speeches stiff as hickman's ruffles with thy aspirations and
protestations unused thy weak head to bear the sublimities that fall 
even in common conversation from the lips of this ever-charming
creature 

but the prettiest whim of all was to drop the bank note behind her
chair instead of presenting it on thy knees to her hand to make such a
woman as this doubly stoop by the acceptance and to take it from the
ground what an ungrateful benefit-conferrer art thou how awkward to
take in into thy head that the best way of making a present to a lady
was to throw the present behind her chair 

i am very desirous to see what she has written to her sister what she is
about to write to miss howe and what return she will have from the
harlowe-arabella canst thou not form some scheme to come at the copies
of these letters or the substance of them at least and of that of her
other correspondencies mrs lovick thou seemest to say is a pious
woman the lady having given such a particular history of herself will
acquaint her with every thing and art thou not about to reform won't
this consent of minds between thee and the widow  what age is she jack 
the devil never trumpt up a friendship between a man and a woman of any
thing like years which did not end in matrimony or in the ruin of their
morals   won't it strike out an intimacy between ye that may enable
thee to gratify me in this particular a proselyte i can tell thee has
great influence upon your good people such a one is a saint of their own
creation and they will water and cultivate and cherish him as a plant
of their own raising and this from a pride truly spiritual 

one of my lovers in paris was a devotee she took great pains to convert
me i gave way to her kind endeavours for the good of my soul she
thought it a point gained to make me profess some religion the catholic
has its conveniencies i permitted her to bring a father to me my
reformation went on swimmingly the father had hopes of me he applauded
her zeal so did i and how dost thou think it ended not a girl in
england reading thus far but would guess in a word very happily for
she not only brought me a father but made me one and then being
satisfied with each other's conversation we took different routes she
into navarre i into italy both well inclined to propagate the good
lessons in which we had so well instructed each other 

but to return one consolation arises to me from the pretty regrets
which this admirable creature seems to have in indulging reflections on
the people's wedding-day i once thou makest her break off with
saying 

she once what o belford why didst thou not urge her to explain what
she once hoped 

what once a woman hopes in love matters she always hopes while there
is room for hope and are we not both single can she be any man's but
mine will i be any woman's but her's 

i never will i never can and i tell thee that i am every day every
hour more and more in love with her and at this instant have a more
vehement passion for her than ever i had in my life and that with views
absolutely honourable in her own sense of the word nor have i varied 
so much as in wish for this week past firmly fixed and wrought into my
very nature as the life of honour or of generous confidence in me was 
in preference to the life of doubt and distrust that must be a life of
doubt and distrust surely where the woman confides nothing and ties up
a man for his good behaviour for life taking church-and-state sanctions
in aid of the obligation she imposes upon him 

i shall go on monday to a kind of ball to which colonel ambrose has
invited me it is given on a family account i care not on what for
all that delights me in the thing is that mrs and miss howe are to be
there hickman of course for the old lady will not stir abroad without
him the colonel is in hopes that miss arabella harlowe will be there
likewise for all the men and women of fashion round him are invited 

i fell in by accident with the colonel who i believe hardly thought i
would accept of the invitation but he knows me not if he thinks i am
ashamed to appear at any place where women dare show their faces yet
he hinted to me that my name was up on miss harlowe's account but to
allude to one of lord m s phrases if it be i will not lie a bed when
any thing joyous is going forward 

as i shall go in my lord's chariot i would have had one of my cousins
montague to go with me but they both refused and i shall not choose to
take either of thy brethren it would look as if i thought i wanted a
bodyguard besides one of them is too rough the other too smooth and
too great a fop for some of the staid company that will be there and for
me in particular men are known by their companions and a fop  as
tourville for example  takes great pains to hang out a sign by his dress
of what he has in his shop thou indeed art an exception dressing
like a coxcomb yet a very clever fellow nevertheless so clumsy a beau 
that thou seemest to me to owe thyself a double spite making thy
ungracefulness appear the more ungraceful by thy remarkable tawdriness 
when thou art out of mourning 

i remember when i first saw thee my mind laboured with a strong puzzle 
whether i should put thee down for a great fool or a smatterer in wit 
something i saw was wrong in thee by thy dress if this fellow thought
i delights not so much in ridicule that he will not spare himself he
must be plaguy silly to take so much pains to make his ugliness more
conspicuous than it would otherwise be 

plain dress for an ordinary man or woman implies at least modesty and
always procures a kind quarter from the censorious who will ridicule a
personal imperfection in one that seems conscious that it is an
imperfection who ever said an anchoret was poor but who would spare
so very absurd a wrong-head as should bestow tinsel to make his
deformity the more conspicuous 

but although i put on these lively airs i am sick at my soul my whole
heart is with my charmer with what indifference shall i look upon all
the assembly at the colonel's my beloved in my ideal eye and engrossing
my whole heart 



letter xxxiii

miss howe to miss arabella harlowe
thursday july 20 


miss harlowe 

i cannot help acquainting you however it may be received coming from
me that your poor sister is dangerously ill at the house of one smith 
who keeps a glover's and perfume shop in king-street covent-garden 
she knows not that i write some violent words in the nature of an
imprecation from her father afflict her greatly in her weak state i
presume not to direct you what to do in this case you are her sister 
i therefore could not help writing to you not only for her sake but for
your own i am madam 

your humble servant 
anna howe 



letter xxxiv

miss arabella harlowe
 in answer  
thursday july 20 


miss howe 

i have your's of this morning all that has happened to the unhappy body
you mentioned is what we foretold and expected let him for whose sake
she abandoned us be her comfort we are told he has remorse and would
marry her we don't believe it indeed she may be very ill her
disappointment may make her so or ought yet is she the only one i know
who is disappointed 

i cannot say miss that the notification from you is the more welcome 
for the liberties you have been pleased to take with our whole family for
resenting a conduct that it is a shame any young lady should justify 
excuse this freedom occasioned by greater i am miss 

your humble servant 
arabella harlowe 



letter xxxv

miss howe
 in reply  
friday july 21 


miss arabella harlowe 

if you had half as much sense as you have ill-nature you would
 notwithstanding the exuberance of the latter have been able to
distinguish between a kind intention to you all that you might have the
less to reproach yourselves with if a deplorable case should happen and
an officiousness i owed you not by reason of freedoms at least
reciprocal i will not for the unhappy body's sake as you call a
sister you have helped to make so say all that i could say if what i
fear happen you shall hear whether desired or not all the mind of

anna howe 



letter xxxvi

miss arabella harlowe to miss howe
friday july 21 


miss anna howe 

your pert letter i have received you that spare nobody i cannot
expect should spare me you are very happy in a prudent and watchful
mother but else mine cannot be exceeded in prudence but we had all too
good an opinion of somebody to think watchfulness needful there may
possibly be some reason why you are so much attached to her in an error
of this flagrant nature 

i help to make a sister unhappy it is false miss it is all her own
doings except indeed what she may owe to somebody's advice you know
who can best answer for that 

let us know your mind as soon as you please as we shall know it to be
your mind we shall judge what attention to give it that's all from 
etc 

ar h 


letter xxxvii

miss howe to miss arabella harlowe
sat july 22 


it may be the misfortune of some people to engage every body's notice 
others may be the happier though they may be the more envious for
nobody's thinking them worthy of any but one would be glad people had
the sense to be thankful for that want of consequence which subject them
not to hazards they would heartily have been able to manage under 

i own to you that had it not been for the prudent advice of that
admirable somebody whose principal fault is the superiority of her
talents and whose misfortune to be brother'd and sister'd by a couple of
creatures who are not able to comprehend her excellencies i might at
one time have been plunged into difficulties but pert as the
superlatively pert may think me i thought not myself wiser because i
was older nor for that poor reason qualified to prescribe to much less
to maltreat a genius so superior 

i repeat it with gratitude that the dear creature's advice was of very
great service to me and this before my mother's watchfulness became
necessary but how it would have fared with me i cannot say had i had
a brother or sister who had deemed it their interest as well as a
gratification of their sordid envy to misrepresent me 

your admirable sister in effect saved you miss as well as me with
this difference you against your will me with mine and but for your
own brother and his own sister would not have been lost herself 

would to heaven both sisters had been obliged with their own wills the
most admirable of her sex would never then have been out of her father's
house you miss i don't know what had become of you but let what
would have happened you would have met with the humanity you have not
shown whether you had deserved it or not nor at the worst lost
either a kind sister or a pitying friend in the most excellent of
sisters 

but why run i into length to such a poor thing why push i so weak an
adversary whose first letter is all low malice and whose next is made
up of falsehood and inconsistence as well as spite and ill-manners yet
i was willing to give you a part of my mind call for more of it it
shall be at your service from one who though she thanks god she is not
your sister is not your enemy but that she is not the latter is
withheld but by two considerations one that you bear though unworthily 
a relation to a sister so excellent the other that you are not of
consequence enough to engage any thing but the pity and contempt of

a h 



letter xxxviii

mrs harlowe to mrs howe
sat july 22 


dear madam 

i send you enclosed copies of five letters that have passed between
miss howe and my arabella you are a person of so much prudence and good
sense and being a mother yourself can so well enter into the
distresses of all our family upon the rashness and ingratitude of a
child we once doated upon that i dare say you will not countenance the
strange freedoms your daughter has taken with us all these are not the
only ones we have to complain of but we were silent on the others as
they did not as these have done spread themselves out upon paper we
only beg that we may not be reflected upon by a young lady who knows not
what we have suffered and do suffer by the rashness of a naughty
creature who has brought ruin upon herself and disgrace upon a family
which she had robbed of all comfort i offer not to prescribe to your
known wisdom in this case but leave it to you to do as you think most
proper i am madam 

your most humble servant 
charl harlowe 



letter xxxix

mrs howe
 in answer  
sat july 22 


dear madam 

i am highly offended with my daughter's letters to miss harlowe i knew
nothing at all of her having taken such a liberty these young creatures
have such romantic notions some of live some of friendship that there
is no governing them in either nothing but time and dear experience 
will convince them of their absurdities in both i have chidden miss
howe very severely i had before so just a notion of what your whole
family's distress must be that as i told your brother mr antony
harlowe i had often forbid her corresponding with the poor fallen angel
 for surely never did young lady more resemble what we imagine of
angels both in person and mind but tired out with her headstrong
ways  i am sorry to say this of my own child   i was forced to give way
to it again and indeed so sturdy was she in her will that i was
afraid it would end in a fit of sickness as too often it did in fits of
sullens 

none but parents know the trouble that children give they are happiest 
i have often thought who have none and these women-grown girls bless
my heart how ungovernable 

i believe however you will have no more such letters from my nancy i
have been forced to use compulsion with her upon miss clary's illness 
 and it seems she is very bad   or she would have run away to london to
attend upon her and this she calls doing the duty of a friend 
forgetting that she sacrifices to her romantic friendship her duty to her
fond indulgent mother 

there are a thousand excellencies in the poor sufferer notwithstanding
her fault and if the hints she has given to my daughter be true she
has been most grievously abused but i think your forgiveness and her
father's forgiveness of her ought to be all at your own choice and
nobody should intermeddle in that for the sake of due authority in
parents and besides as miss harlowe writes it was what every body
expected though miss clary would not believe it till she smarted for her
credulity and fir these reasons i offer not to plead any thing in
alleviation of her fault which is aggravated by her admirable sense and
a judgment above her years 

i am madam with compliments to good mr harlowe and all your afflicted
family 

your most humble servant 
annabella howe 


i shall set out for the isle of wight in a few days with my daughter i
 will hasten our setting out on purpose to break her mind from her
 friend's distresses which afflict us as much nearly as miss
 clary's rashness has done you 



letter xl

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
sat july 22 


my dearest friend 

we are busy in preparing for our little journey and voyage but i will be
ill i will be very ill if i cannot hear you are better before i go 

rogers greatly afflicted me by telling me the bad way you are in but
now you have been able to hold a pen and as your sense is strong and
clear i hope that the amusement you will receive from writing will make
you better 

i dispatch this by an extraordinary way that it may reach you time
enough to move you to consider well before you absolutely decide upon the
contents of mine of the 13th on the subject of the two misses montague's
visit to me since according to what you write must i answer them 

in your last conclude very positively that you will not be his to be
sure he rather deserves an infamous death than such a wife but as i
really believe him innocent of the arrest and as all his family are such
earnest pleaders and will be guarantees for him i think the compliance
with their entreaties and his own will be now the best step you can
take your own family remaining implacable as i can assure you they do 
he is a man of sense and it is not impossible but he may make you a good
husband and in time may become no bad man 

my mother is entirely of my opinion and on friday pursuant to a hint i
gave you in my last mr hickman had a conference with the strange
wretch and though he liked not by any means his behaviour to himself 
nor indeed had reason to do so yet he is of opinion that he is
sincerely determined to marry you if you will condescend to have him 

perhaps mr hickman may make you a private visit before we set out if
i may not attend you myself i shall not be easy except he does and he
will then give you an account of the admirable character the surprising
wretch gave of you and of the justice he does to your virtue 

he was as acknowledging to his relations though to his own condemnation 
as his two cousins told me all he apprehends as he said to mr 
hickman is that if you go on exposing him wedlock itself will not wipe
off the dishonour to both and moreover that you would ruin your
constitution by your immoderate sorrow and by seeking death when you
might avoid it would not be able to escape it when you would wish to do
so 

so my dearest friend i charge you if you can to get over your
aversion to this vile man you may yet live to see many happy days and
be once more the delight of all your friends neighbours and
acquaintance as well as a stay a comfort and a blessing to your anna
howe 

i long to have your answer to mine of the 13th pray keep the messenger
till it be ready if he return on monday night it will be time enough
for his affairs and to find me come back from colonel ambrose's who
gives a ball on the anniversary of mrs ambrose's birth and marriage both
in one the gentry all round the neighbourhood are invited this time on
some good news they have received from mrs ambrose's brother the
governor 

my mother promised the colonel for me and herself in my absence i
would fain have excused myself to her and the rather as i had
exceptions on account of the day but she is almost as young as her
daughter and thinking it not so well to go without me she told me and
having had a few sparring blows with each other very lately i think i
must comply for i don't love jingling when i can help it though i
seldom make it my study to avoid the occasion when it offers of itself 
i don't know if either were not a little afraid of the other whether it
would be possible that we could live together i all my father my
mamma what all my mother what else should i say 


 the 24th of july miss clarissa harlowe's birth-day 


o my dear how many things happen in this life to give us displeasure 
how few to give us joy i am sure i shall have none on this occasion 
since the true partner of my heart the principal of the one soul that
it used to be said animated the pair of friends as we were called you 
my dear  who used to irradiate every circle you set your foot into and
to give me real significance in a second place to yourself   cannot be
there one hour of your company my ever instructive friend  i thirst
for it   how infinitely preferable would it be to me to all the
diversions and amusements with which our sex are generally most delighted
 adieu my dear 

a howe 



letter xli

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
sunday july 23 


what pain my dearest friend does your kind solicitude for my welfare
give me how much more binding and tender are the ties of pure
friendship and the union of like minds than the ties of nature well
might the sweet-singer of israel when he was carrying to the utmost
extent the praises of the friendship between him and his beloved friend 
say that the love of jonathan to him was wonderful that it surpassed
the love of women what an exalted idea does it give of the soul of
jonathan sweetly attempered for the sacred band if we may suppose it
but equal to that of my anna howe for her fallen clarissa but although
i can glory in your kind love for me think my dear what concern must
fill a mind not ungenerous when the obligation lies all on one side 
and when at the same time that your light is the brighter for my
darkness i must give pain to a dear friend to whom i delighted to give
pleasure and not pain only but discredit for supporting my blighted
fame against the busy tongues of uncharitable censures 

this is that makes me in the words of my admired exclaimer very little
altered often repeat oh that i were as in months past as in the days
when god preserved me when his candle shined upon my head and when by
his light i walked through darkness as i was in the days of my
childhood when the almighty was yet with me when i was in my father's
house when i washed my steps with butter and the rock poured me out
rivers of oil 

you set before me your reasons enforced by the opinion of your honoured
mother why i should think of mr lovelace for a husband 


 see the preceding letter 


and i have before me your letter of the 13th containing the account of
the visit and proposals and kind interposition of the two misses
montague in the names of the good ladies sadleir and betty lawrance and
in that of my lord m 


 see letter ix of this vol 


also your's of the 18th demanding me as i may say of those ladies 
and of that family when i was so infamously and cruelly arrested and
you knew not what was become of me 


 see letter xi ibid 


the answer likewise of those ladies signed in so full and generous a
manner by themselves and by that nobleman and those two venerable
ladies and in his light way by the wretch himself 


 see letter xiv ibid 


thse my dearest miss howe and your letter of the 16th which came when
i was under arrest and which i received not till some days after are
all before me 


 see letter x of this volume 


and i have as well weighed the whole matter and your arguments in
support of your advice as at present my head and my heart will let me
weigh them 

i am moreover willing to believe not only from your own opinion but
from the assurances of one of mr lovelace's friends mr belford a
good-natured and humane man who spares not to censure the author of my
calamities i think with undissembled and undesigning sincerity that
that man is innocent of the disgraceful arrest 

and even if you please in sincere compliment to your opinion and to
that of mr hickman that over-persuaded by his friends and ashamed of
his unmerited baseness to me he would in earnest marry me if i would
have him 

 well and now what is the result of all it is this that i must
abide by what i have already declared and that is  don't be angry at
me my best friend   that i have much more pleasure in thinking of death 
than of such a husband in short as i declared in my last that i
cannot  forgive me if i say i will not  ever be his 


 those parts of this letter which are marked with an inverted comma
 thus    were afterwards transcribed by miss howe in letter lv written
to the ladies of mr lovelace's family and are thus distinguished to
avoid the necessity of repeating them in that letter 


but you will expect my reasons i know you will and if i give them not 
will conclude me either obstinate or implacable or both and those
would be sad imputations if just to be laid to the charge of a person
who thinks and talks of dying and yet to say that resentment and
disappointment have no part in my determination would be saying a thing
hardly to be credited for i own i have resentment strong resentment 
but not unreasonable ones as you will be convinced if already you are
not so when you know all my story if ever you do know it for i begin
to fear so many things more necessary to be thought of than either this
man or my own vindication have i to do that i shall not have time to
compass what i have intended and in a manner promised you 


 see vol vi letter lxxiii 


i have one reason to give in support of my resolution that i believe 
yourself will allow of but having owned that i have resentments i will
begin with those considerations in which anger and disappointment have
too great a share in hopes that having once disburdened my mind upon
paper and to my anna howe of those corroding uneasy passions i shall
prevent them for ever from returning to my heart and to have their place
supplied by better milder and more agreeable ones 

my pride then my dearest friend although a great deal mortified is
not sufficiently mortified if it be necessary for me to submit to make
that man my choice whose actions are and ought to be my abhorrence 
what shall i who have been treated with such premeditated and
perfidious barbarity as is painful to be thought of and cannot with
modesty be described think of taking the violator to my heart can i
vow duty to one so wicked and hazard my salvation by joining myself to
so great a profligate now i know him to be so do you think your
clarissa harlowe so lost so sunk at least as that she could for the
sake of patching up in the world's eye a broken reputation meanly
appear indebted to the generosity or perhaps compassion of a man who
has by means so inhuman robbed her of it indeed my dear i should
not think my penitence for the rash step i took any thing better than a
specious delusion if i had not got above the least wish to have mr 
lovelace for my husband 

yes i warrant i must creep to the violator and be thankful to him for
doing me poor justice 

do you not already see me pursuing the advice you give with a downcast
eye appear before his friends and before my own supposing the latter
would at last condescend to own me divested of that noble confidence
which arises from a mind unconscious of having deserved reproach 

do you not see me creep about mine own house preferring all my honest
maidens to myself as if afraid too to open my lips either by way of
reproof or admonition lest their bolder eyes should bid me look inward 
and not expect perfection from them 

and shall i entitle the wretch to upbraid me with his generosity and
his pity and perhaps to reproach me for having been capable of forgiving
crimes of such a nature 

i once indeed hoped little thinking him so premeditatedly vile a man 
that i might have the happiness to reclaim him i vainly believed that he
loved me well enough to suffer my advice for his good and the example i
humbly presumed i should be enabled to set him to have weight with him 
and the rather as he had no mean opinion of my morals and understanding 
but now what hope is there left for this my prime hope were i to marry
him what a figure should i make preaching virtue and morality to a man
whom i had trusted with opportunities to seduce me from all my own
duties and then supposing i were to have children by such a husband 
must it not think you cut a thoughtful person to the heart to look
round upon her little family and think she had given them a father
destined without a miracle to perdition and whose immoralities 
propagated among them by his vile example might too probably bring
down a curse upon them and after all who knows but that my own sinful
compliances with a man who might think himself entitled to my obedience 
might taint my own morals and make me instead of a reformer an
imitator of him for who can touch pitch and not be defiled 

let me then repeat that i truly despise this man if i know my own
heart indeed i do i pity him beneath my very pity as he is i
nevertheless pity him but this i could not do if i still loved him 
for my dear one must be greatly sensible of the baseness and
ingratitude of those we love i love him not therefore my soul
disdains communion with him 

but although thus much is due to resentment yet have i not been so
far carried away by its angry effects as to be rendered incapable of
casting about what i ought to do and what could be done if the
almighty in order to lengthen the time of my penitence were to bid
me to live 

the single life at such times has offered to me as the life the
only life to be chosen but in that must i not now sit brooding over
my past afflictions and mourning my faults till the hour of my release 
and would not every one be able to assign the reason why clarissa harlowe
chose solitude and to sequester herself from the world would not the
look of every creature who beheld me appear as a reproach to me and
would not my conscious eye confess my fault whether the eyes of others
accused me or not one of my delights was to enter the cots of my poor
neighbours to leave lessons to the boys and cautions to the elder
girls and how should i be able unconscious and without pain to say
to the latter fly the delusions of men who had been supposed to have
run away with one 

what then my dear and only friend can i wish for but death and what 
after all is death tis but a cessation from mortal life tis but the
finishing of an appointed course the refreshing inn after a fatiguing
journey the end of a life of cares and troubles and if happy the
beginning of a life of immortal happiness 

if i die not now it may possibly happen that i may be taken when i am
less prepared had i escaped the evils i labour under it might have
been in the midst of some gay promising hope when my heart had beat high
with the desire of life and when the vanity of this earth had taken hold
of me 

but now my dear for your satisfaction let me say that although i wish
not for life yet would i not like a poor coward desert my post when i
can maintain it and when it is my duty to maintain it 

more than once indeed was i urged by thoughts so sinful but then it
was in the height of my distress and once particularly i have reason
to believe i saved myself by my desperation from the most shocking
personal insults from a repetition as far as i know of his vileness 
the base women with so much reason dreaded by me present to intimidate
me if not to assist him o my dear you know not what i suffered on
that occasion nor do i what i escaped at the time if the wicked man
had approached me to execute the horrid purposes of his vile heart 

as i am of opinion that it would have manifested more of revenge and
despair than of principle had i committed a violence upon myself when
the villany was perpetrated so i should think it equally criminal were
i now wilfully to neglect myself were i purposely to run into the arms
of death as that man supposes i shall do when i might avoid it 

nor my dear whatever are the suppositions of such a short-sighted such
a low-souled man must you impute to gloom to melancholy to
despondency nor yet to a spirit of faulty pride or still more faulty
revenge the resolution i have taken never to marry this and if not
this any man so far from deserving this imputation i do assure you 
 my dear and only love that i will do every thing i can to prolong my
life till god in mercy to me shall be pleased to call for it i have
reason to think my punishment is but the due consequence of my fault and
i will not run away from it but beg of heaven to sanctify it to me 
when appetite serves i will eat and drink what is sufficient to support
nature a very little you know will do for that and whatever my
physicians shall think fit to prescribe i will take though ever so
disagreeable in short i will do every thing i can do to convince all
my friends who hereafter may think it worth their while to inquire after
my last behaviour that i possessed my soul with tolerable patience and
endeavoured to bear with a lot of my own drawing for thus in humble
imitation of the sublimest exemplar i often say lord it is thy will 
and it shall be mine thou art just in all thy dealings with the
children of men and i know thou wilt not afflict me beyond what i can
bear and if i can bear it i ought to bear it and thy grace assisting
me i will bear it 

but here my dear is another reason a reason that will convince you
yourself that i ought not to think of wedlock but of a preparation for a
quite different event i am persuaded as much as that i am now alive 
that i shall not long live the strong sense i have ever had of my
fault the loss of my reputation my disappointments the determined
resentment of my friends aiding the barbarous usage i have met with
where i least deserved it have seized upon my heart seized upon it 
before it was so well fortified by religious considerations as i hope it
now is don't be concerned my dear but i am sure if i may say it with
as little presumption as grief that god will soon dissolve my substance 
and bring me to death and to the house appointed for all living 

and now my dearest friend you know all my mind and you will be
pleased to write to the ladies of mr lovelace's family that i think
myself infinitely obliged to them for their good opinion of me and that
it has given me greater pleasure than i thought i had to come in this
life that upon the little knowledge they have of me and that not
personal i was thought worthy after the ill usage i have received of
an alliance with their honourable family but that i can by no means
think of their kinsman for a husband and do you my dear extract from
the above such reasons as you think have any weight with them 

i would write myself to acknowledge their favour had i not more
employment for my head my heart and my fingers than i doubt they will
be able to go through 

i should be glad to know when you set out on your journey as also your
little stages and your time of stay at your aunt harman's that my
prayers may locally attend you whithersoever you go and wherever you
are 

clarissa harlowe 



letter xlii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
sunday july 23 


the letter accompanying this being upon a very particular subject i
would not embarrass it as i may say with any other and yet having
some farther matters upon my mind which will want your excuse for
directing them to you i hope the following lines will have that excuse 

my good mrs norton so long ago as in a letter dated the 3d of this
month hinted to me that my relations took amiss some severe things you
were pleased in love to me to say to them mrs norton mentioned it
with that respectful love which she bears to my dearest friend but
wished for my sake that you would rein in a vivacity which on most
other occasions so charmingly becomes you this was her sense you
know that i am warranted to speak and write freer to my anna howe than
mrs norton would do 


 see vol vi letter lxiii 


i durst not mention it to you at that time because appearances were so
strong against me on mr lovelace's getting me again into his power 
 after my escape to hampstead as made you very angry with me when you
answered mine on my second escape and soon afterwards i was put under
that barbarous arrest so that i could not well touch upon the subject
till now 

now therefore my dearest miss howe let me repeat my earnest request
 for this is not the first time by several that i have been obliged to
chide you on this occasion that you will spare my parents and other
relations in all your conversations about me indeed i wish they had
thought fit to take other measures with me but who shall judge for them 
 the event has justified them and condemned me they expected nothing
good of this vile man he had not therefore deceived them but they
expected other things from me and i have and they have the more reason
to be set against me if as my aunt hervey wrote formerly they
intended not to force my inclinations in favour of mr solmes and if
they believe that my going off was the effect of choice and
premeditation 


 see vol iii letter lii 


i have no desire to be received to favour by them for why should i sit
down to wish for what i have no reason to expect besides i could not
look them in the face if they would receive me indeed i could not 
all i have to hope for is first that my father will absolve me from his
heavy malediction and next for a last blessing the obtaining of these
favours are needful to my peace of mind 

i have written to my sister but have only mentioned the absolution 

i am afraid i shall receive a very harsh answer from her my fault in
the eyes of my family is of so enormous a nature that my first
application will hardly be encouraged then they know not nor perhaps
will believe that i am so very ill as i am so that were i actually to
die before they could have time to take the necessary informations you
must not blame them too severely you must call it a fatality i know
not what you must call it for alas i have made them as miserable as i
am myself and yet sometimes i think that were they cheerfully to
pronounce me forgiven i know not whether my concern for having offended
them would not be augmented since i imagine that nothing can be more
wounding to a spirit not ungenerous than a generous forgiveness 

i hope your mother will permit our correspondence for one month more 
although i do not take her advice as to having this man when
catastrophes are winding up what changes changes that make one's heart
shudder to think of may one short month produce but if she will not 
why then my dear it becomes us both to acquiesce 

you can't think what my apprehensions would have been had i known mr 
hickman was to have had a meeting on such a questioning occasion as must
have been his errand from you with that haughty and uncontroulable man 

you give me hope of a visit from mr hickman let him expect to see me
greatly altered i know he loves me for he loves every one whom you
love a painful interview i doubt but i shall be glad to see a man
whom you will one day and that on an early day i hope make happy 
whose gentle manners and unbounded love for you will make you so if it
be not your own fault 

i am my dearest kindest friend the sweet companion of my happy hours 
the friend ever dearest and nearest to my fond heart 

your equally obliged and faithful 
clarissa harlowe 



letter xliii

mrs norton to miss clarissa harlowe
monday july 24 


excuse my dearest young lady my long silence i have been extremely
ill my poor boy has also been at death's door and when i hoped that
he was better he has relapsed alas my dear he is very dangerously
ill let us both have your prayers 

very angry letters have passed between your sister and miss howe every
one of your family is incensed against that young lady i wish you would
remonstrate against her warmth since it can do no good for they will
not believe but that her interposition had your connivance nor that you
are so ill as miss howe assures them you are 

before she wrote they were going to send up young mr brand the
clergyman to make private inquiries of your health and way of life 
but now they are so exasperated that they have laid aside their
intention 

we have flying reports here and at harlowe-place of some fresh insults
which you have undergone and that you are about to put yourself into
lady betty lawrance's protection i believe they would not be glad as i
should be that you would do so and this perhaps will make them
suspend for the present any determination in your favour 

how unhappy am i that the dangerous way my son is in prevents my
attendance on you let me beg of you to write to me word how you are 
both as to person and mind a servant of sir robert beachcroft who
rides post on his master's business to town will present you with this 
and perhaps will bring me the favour of a few lines in return he will
be obliged to stay in town several hours for an answer to his dispatches 

this is the anniversary that used to give joy to as many as had the
pleasure and honour of knowing you may the almighty bless you and
grant that it may be the only unhappy one that may ever be known by you 
my dearest young lady and by

your ever affectionate
judith norton 



letter xliv

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs norton
monday night july 24 


my dear mrs norton 

had i not fallen into fresh troubles which disabled me for several days
from holding a pen i should not have forborne inquiring after your
health and that of your son for i should have been but too ready to
impute your silence to the cause to which to my very great concern i
find it was owing i pray to heaven my dear good friend to give you
comfort in the way most desirable to yourself 

i am exceedingly concerned at miss howe's writing about me to my friends 
i do assure you that i was as ignorant of her intention so to do as of
the contents of her letter nor has she yet let me know discouraged i
suppose by her ill success that she did write it is impossible to
share the delight which such charming spirits give without the
inconvenience that will attend their volatility so mixed are our best
enjoyments 

it was but yesterday that i wrote to chide the dear creature for freedoms
of that nature which her unseasonably-expressed love for me had made her
take as you wrote me word in your former i was afraid that all such
freedoms would be attributed to me and i am sure that nothing but my
own application to my friends and a full conviction of my contrition 
will procure me favour least of all can i expect that either your
mediation or her's both of whose fond and partial love of me is so well
known will avail me 


 she then gives a brief account of the arrest of her dejection under it 
 of her apprehensions of being carried to her former lodgings of
 mr lovelace's avowed innocence as to that insult of her release
 by mr belford of mr lovelace's promise not to molest her of her
 clothes being sent her of the earnest desire of all his friends 
 and of himself to marry her of miss howe's advice to comply with
 their requests and of her declared resolution rather to die than
 be his sent to miss howe to be given to his relations but as the
 day before after which she thus proceeds  

now my dear mrs norton you will be surprised perhaps that i should
have returned such an answer but when you have every thing before you 
you who know me so well will not think me wrong and besides i am
upon a better preparation than for an earthly husband 

nor let it be imagined my dear and ever venerable friend that my
present turn of mind proceeds from gloominess or melancholy for although
it was brought on by disappointment the world showing me early even at
my first rushing into it its true and ugly face yet i hope that it has
obtained a better root and will every day more and more by its fruits 
demonstrate to me and to all my friends that it has 

i have written to my sister last friday i wrote so the die is thrown 
i hope for a gentle answer but perhaps they will not vouchsafe me
any it is my first direct application you know i wish miss howe had
left me to my own workings in this tender point 

it will be a great satisfaction to me to hear of your perfect recovery 
and that my foster-brother is out of danger but why said i out of
danger when can this be justly said of creatures who hold by so
uncertain a tenure this is one of those forms of common speech that
proves the frailty and the presumption of poor mortal at the same time 

don't be uneasy you cannot answer your wishes to be with me i am
happier than i could have expected to be among mere strangers it was
grievous at first but use reconciles every thing to us the people of
the house where i am are courteous and honest there is a widow who
lodges in it  have i not said so formerly   a good woman who is the
better for having been a proficient in the school of affliction 

an excellent school my dear mrs norton in which we are taught to know
ourselves to be able to compassionate and bear with one another and to
look up to a better hope 

i have as humane a physician whose fees are his least regard and as
worthy an apothecary as ever patient was visited by my nurse is
diligent obliging silent and sober so i am not unhappy without and
within i hope my dear mrs norton that i shall be every day more and
more happy within 

no doubt it would be one of the greatest comforts i could know to have
you with me you who love me so dearly who have been the watchful
sustainer of my helpless infancy you by whose precepts i have been so
much benefited in your dear bosom could i repose all my griefs and by
your piety and experience in the ways of heaven should i be strengthened
in what i am still to go through 

but as it must not be i will acquiesce and so i hope will you for
you see in what respects i am not unhappy and in those that i am they
lie not in your power to remedy 

then as i have told you i have all my clothes in my own possession so
i am rich enough as to this world in common conveniencies 

you see my venerable and dear friend that i am not always turning the
dark side of my prospects in order to move compassion a trick imputed
to me too often by my hard-hearted sister when if i know my own
heart it is above all trick or artifice yet i hope at last i shall be
so happy as to receive benefit rather than reproach from this talent if
it be my talent at last i say for whose heart have i hitherto moved 
 not one i am sure that was not predetermined in my favour 

as to the day i have passed it as i ought to pass it it has been a
very heavy day to me more for my friends sake too than for my own 
how did they use to pass it what a festivity how have they now passed
it to imagine it how grievous say not that those are cruel who
suffer so much for my fault and who for eighteen years together 
rejoiced in me and rejoiced me by their indulgent goodness but i will
think the rest adieu my dearest mrs norton 

adieu 



letter xlv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss arabella harlowe
friday july 21 


if my dearest sister i did not think the state of my health very
precarious and that it was my duty to take this step i should hardly
have dared to approach you although but with my pen after having found
your censures so dreadfully justified as they have been 

i have not the courage to write to my father himself nor yet to my
mother and it is with trembling that i address myself to you to beg of
you to intercede for me that my father will have the goodness to revoke
that heaviest part of the very heavy curse he laid upon me which relates
to hereafter for as to the here i have indeed met with my punishment
from the very wretch in whom i was supposed to place my confidence 

as i hope not for restoration to favour i may be allowed to be very
earnest on this head yet will i not use any arguments in support of my
request because i am sure my father were it in his power would not
have his poor child miserable for ever 

i have the most grateful sense of my mother's goodness in sending me up
my clothes i would have acknowledged the favour the moment i received
them with the most thankful duty but that i feared any line from me
would be unacceptable 

i would not give fresh offence so will decline all other commendations
of duty and love appealing to my heart for both where both are flaming
with an ardour that nothing but death can extinguish therefore only
subscribe myself without so much as a name 

my dear and happy sister 
your afflicted servant 


a letter directed for me at mr smith's a glover in king-street 
 covent-garden will come to hand 



letter xlvi

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
 in answer to letters xxix xxxii of this volume  
edgware monday july 24 


what pains thou takest to persuade thyself that the lady's ill health
is owing to the vile arrest and to the implacableness of her friends 
both primarily if they were to be laid at thy door what poor excuses
will good hearts make for the evils they are put upon by bad hearts but
tis no wonder that he who can sit down premeditatedly to do a bad
action will content himself with a bad excuse and yet what fools must
he suppose the rest of the world to be if he imagines them as easy to be
imposed upon as he can impose upon himself 

in vain dost thou impute to pride or wilfulness the necessity to which
thou hast reduced this lady of parting with her clothes for can she do
otherwise and be the noble-minded creature she is 

her implacable friends have refused her the current cash she left behind
her and wished as her sister wrote to her to see her reduced to want 
probably therefore they will not be sorry that she is reduced to such
straights and will take it for a justification from heaven of their
wicked hard heartedness thou canst not suppose she would take supplies
from thee to take them from me would in her opinion be taking them
from thee miss howe's mother is an avaricious woman and perhaps the
daughter can do nothing of that sort unknown to her and if she could 
is too noble a girl to deny it if charged and then miss harlowe is
firmly of opinion that she shall never want nor wear the think she
disposes of 

having heard nothing from town that obliges me to go thither i shall
gratify poor belton with my company till to-morrow or perhaps till
wednesday for the unhappy man is more and more loth to part with me 
i shall soon set out for epsom to endeavour to serve him there and
re-instate him in his own house poor fellow he is most horribly low
spirited mopes about and nothing diverts him i pity him at my heart 
but can do him no good what consolation can i give him either from his
past life or from his future prospects 

our friendships and intimacies lovelace are only calculated for strong
life and health when sickness comes we look round us and upon one
another like frighted birds at the sight of a kite ready to souse upon
them then with all our bravery what miserable wretches are we 

thou tallest me that thou seest reformation is coming swiftly upon me i
hope it is i see so much difference in the behaviour of this admirable
woman in her illness and that of poor belton in his that it is plain to
me the sinner is the real coward and the saint the true hero and 
sooner or later we shall all find it to be so if we are not cut off
suddenly 

the lady shut herself up at six o'clock yesterday afternoon and intends
not to see company till seven or eight this not even her nurse imposing
upon herself a severe fast and why it is her birth-day every
birth-day till this no doubt happy what must be her reflections 
what ought to be thine 

what sport dost thou make with my aspirations and my prostrations as
thou callest them and with my dropping of the banknote behind her chair 
i had too much awe of her at the time to make it with the grace that
would better have become my intention but the action if awkward was
modest indeed the fitter subject for ridicule with thee who canst no
more taste the beauty and delicacy of modest obligingness than of modest
love for the same may be said of inviolable respect that the poet says
of unfeigned affection 

 i speak i know not what 
 speak ever so and if i answer you
 i know not what it shows the more of love 
 love is a child that talks in broken language 
 yet then it speaks most plain 

the like may be pleaded in behalf of that modest respect which made the
humble offerer afraid to invade the awful eye or the revered hand but
awkwardly to drop its incense behind the altar it should have been laid
upon but how should that soul which could treat delicacy itself
brutally know any thing of this 

but i am still more amazed at thy courage to think of throwing thyself
in the way of miss howe and miss arabella harlowe thou wilt not dare 
surely to carry this thought into execution 

as to my dress and thy dress i have only to say that the sum total of
thy observation is this that my outside is the worst of me and thine
the best of thee and what gettest thou by the comparison do thou
reform the one i'll try to mend the other i challenge thee to begin 

mrs lovick gave me at my request the copy of a meditation she showed
me which was extracted by the lady from the scriptures while under
arrest at rowland's as appears by the date the lady is not to know
that i have taken a copy 

you and i always admired the noble simplicity and natural ease and
dignity of style which are the distinguishing characteristics of these
books whenever any passages from them by way of quotation in the works
of other authors popt upon us and once i remember you even you 
observed that those passages always appeared to you like a rich vein of
golden ore which runs through baser metals embellishing the work they
were brought to authenticate 

try lovelace if thou canst relish a divine beauty i think it must
strike transient if not permanent remorse into thy heart thou
boastest of thy ingenuousness let this be the test of it and whether
thou canst be serious on a subject too deep the occasion of it resulting
from thyself 


meditation
saturday july 15 

o that my grief were thoroughly weighed and my calamity laid in the
balance together 

for now it would be heavier than the sand of the sea therefore my words
are swallowed up 

for the arrows of the almighty are within me the poison whereof drinketh
up my spirit the terrors of god do set themselves in array against me 

when i lie down i say when shall i arise when will the night be gone 
and i am full of tossings to and fro unto the dawning of the day 

my days are swifter than a weaver's shuttle and are spent without hope 
mine eye shall no more see good 

wherefore is light given to her that is in misery and life unto the
bitter in soul 

who longeth for death but it cometh not and diggeth for it more than
for hid treasures 

why is light given to one whose way is hid and whom god hath hedged in 

for the thing which i greatly feared is come upon me 

i was not in safety neither had i rest neither was i quiet yet trouble
came 

but behold god is mighty and despiseth not any 

he giveth right to the poor and if they be found in fetters and holden
in cords of affliction then he showeth them their works and their
transgressions 


i have a little leisure and am in a scribbing vein indulge me 
lovelace a few reflections on these sacred books 

we are taught to read the bible when children as a rudiment only and 
as far as i know this may be the reason why we think ourselves above it
when at a maturer age for you know that our parents as well as we 
wisely rate our proficiency by the books we are advanced to and not by
our understanding of those we have passed through but in my uncle's
illness i had the curiosity in some of my dull hours lighting upon
one in his closet to dip into it and then i found wherever i turned 
that there were admirable things in it i have borrowed one on
receiving from mrs lovick the above meditation for i had a mind to
compare the passages contained in it by the book hardly believing they
could be so exceedingly apposite as i find they are and one time or
another it is very likely that i shall make a resolution to give the
whole bible a perusal by way of course as i may say 

this meantime i will venture to repeat is certain that the style is
that truly easy simple and natural one which we should admire in each
other authors excessively then all the world join in an opinion of the
antiquity and authenticity too of the book and the learned are fond of
strengthening their different arguments by its sanctions indeed i was
so much taken with it at my uncle's that i was half ashamed that it
appeared so new to me and yet i cannot but say that i have some of
the old testament history as it is called in my head but perhaps am
more obliged for it to josephus than to the bible itself 

odd enough with all our pride of learning that we choose to derive the
little we know from the under currents perhaps muddy ones too when the
clear the pellucid fountain-head is much nearer at hand and easier to
be come at slighted the more possibly for that very reason 

but man is a pragmatical foolish creature and the more we look into
him the more we must despise him lords of the creation who can
forbear indignant laughter when we see not one of the individuals of
that creation his perpetually-eccentric self excepted but acts within
its own natural and original appointment is of fancied and
self-dependent excellence he is obliged not only for the ornaments but
for the necessaries of life that is to say for food as well as
raiment to all the other creatures strutting with their blood and
spirits in his veins and with their plumage on his back for what has he
of his own but a very mischievous monkey-like bad nature yet thinks
himself at liberty to kick and cuff and elbow out every worthier
creature and when he has none of the animal creation to hunt down and
abuse will make use of his power his strength or his wealth to
oppress the less powerful and weaker of his own species 

when you and i meet next let us enter more largely into this subject 
and i dare say we shall take it by turns in imitation of the two sages
of antiquity to laugh and to weep at the thoughts of what miserable yet
conceited beings men in general but we libertines in particular are 

i fell upon a piece at dorrell's this very evening intituled the
sacred classics written by one blackwell 

i took it home with me and had not read a dozen pages when i was
convinced that i ought to be ashamed of myself to think how greatly i
have admired less noble and less natural beauties in pagan authors while
i have known nothing of this all-exciting collection of beauties the
bible by my faith lovelace i shall for the future have a better
opinion of the good sense and taste of half a score of parsons whom i
have fallen in with in my time and despised for magnifying as i thought
they did the language and the sentiments to be found in it in
preference to all the ancient poets and philosophers and this is now a
convincing proof to me and shames as much an infidel's presumption as
his ignorance that those who know least are the greatest scoffers a
pretty pack of would-be wits of us who censure without knowledge laugh
without reason and are most noisy and loud against things we know least
of 



letter xlvii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
wednesday july 26 


i came not to town till this morning early poor belton clinging to me 
as a man destitute of all other hold 

i hastened to smith's and had but a very indifferent account of the
lady's health i sent up my compliments and she desired to see me in
the afternoon 

mrs lovick told me that after i went away on saturday she actually
parted with one of her best suits of clothes to a gentlewoman who is her
 mrs lovick's  benefactress and who bought them for a niece who is very
speedily to be married and whom she fits out and portions as her
intended heiress the lady was so jealous that the money might come from
you or me that she would see the purchaser who owned to mrs lovick
that she bought them for half their worth but yet though her conscience
permitted her to take them at such an under rate the widow says her
friend admired the lady as one of the loveliest of her sex and having
been let into a little of her story could not help shedding tears at
taking away her purchase 

she may be a good sort of woman mrs lovick says she is but self is an
odious devil that reconciles to some people the most cruel and dishonest
actions but nevertheless it is my opinion that those who can suffer
themselves to take advantage of the necessities of their
fellow-creatures in order to buy any thing at a less rate than would
allow them the legal interest of their purchase-money supposing they
purchase before they want are no better than robbers for the difference 
 to plunder a wreck and to rob at a fire are indeed higher degrees of
wickedness but do not those as well as these heighten the distresses
of the distressed and heap misery on the miserable whom it is the duty
of every one to relieve 

about three o'clock i went again to smith's the lady was writing when i
sent up my name but admitted of my visit i saw a miserable alteration
in her countenance for the worse and mrs lovick respectfully accusing
her of too great assiduity to her pen early and late and of her
abstinence the day before i took notice of the alteration and told her 
that her physician had greater hopes of her than she had of herself and
i would take the liberty to say that despair of recovery allowed not
room for cure 

she said she neither despaired nor hoped then stepping to the glass 
with great composure my countenance said she is indeed an honest
picture of my heart but the mind will run away with the body at any
time 

writing is all my diversion continued she and i have subjects that
cannot be dispensed with as to my hours i have always been an early
riser but now rest is less in my power than ever sleep has a long time
ago quarreled with me and will not be friends although i have made the
first advances what will be must 

she then stept to her closet and brought me a parcel sealed up with
three seals be so kind said she as to give this to your friend a
very grateful present it ought to be to him for sir this packet
contains such letters of his to me as compared with his actions would
reflect dishonour upon all his sex were they to fall into other hands 

as to my letters to him they are not many he may either keep or
destroy them as he pleases 

i thought lovelace i ought not to forego this opportunity to plead for
you i therefore with the packet in my hand urged all the arguments i
could think of in your favour 

she heard me out with more attention than i could have promised myself 
considering her determined resolution 

i would not interrupt you mr belford said she though i am far from
being pleased with the subject of your discourse the motives for your
pleas in his favour are generous i love to see instances of generous
friendship in either sex but i have written my full mind on this
subject to miss howe who will communicate it to the ladies of his
family no more therefore i pray you upon a topic that may lead to
disagreeable recrimination 

her apothecary came in he advised her to the air and blamed her for so
great an application as he was told she made to her pen and he gave it
as the doctor's opinion as well as his own that she would recover if
she herself desired to recover and would use the means 

she may possibly write too much for her health but i have observed on
several occasions that when the medical men are at a loss what to
prescribe they inquire what their patients like best or are most
diverted with and forbid them that 

but noble minded as they see this lady is they know not half her
nobleness of mind nor how deeply she is wounded and depend too much
upon her youth which i doubt will not do in this case and upon time 
which will not alleviate the woes of such a mind for having been bent
upon doing good and upon reclaiming a libertine whom she loved she is
disappointed in all her darling views and will never be able i fear to
look up with satisfaction enough in herself to make life desirable to
her for this lady had other views in living than the common ones of
eating sleeping dressing visiting and those other fashionable
amusements which fill up the time of most of her sex especially of
those of it who think themselves fitted to shine in and adorn polite
assemblies her grief in short seems to me to be of such a nature 
that time which alleviates most other person's afflictions will as the
poet says give increase to her's 

thou lovelace mightest have seen all this superior excellence as thou
wentest along in every word in every sentiment in every action is it
visible but thy cursed inventions and intriguing spirit ran away with
thee tis fit that the subject of thy wicked boast and thy reflections
on talents so egregiously misapplied should be thy punishment and thy
curse 

mr goddard took his leave and i was going to do so too when the maid
came up and told her a gentleman was below who very earnestly inquired
after her health and desired to see her his name hickman 

she was overjoyed and bid the maid desire the gentleman to walk up 

i would have withdrawn but i supposed she thought it was likely i should
have met him upon the stairs and so she forbid it 

she shot to the stairs-head to receive him and taking his hand asked
half a dozen questions without waiting for any answer in relation to
miss howe's health acknowledging in high terms her goodness in sending
him to see her before she set out upon her little journey 

he gave her a letter from that young lady which she put into her bosom 
saying she would read it by-and-by 

he was visibly shocked to see how ill she looked 

you look at me with concern mr hickman said she o sir times are
strangely altered with me since i saw you last at my dear miss howe's 
what a cheerful creature was i then my heart at rest my prospects
charming and beloved by every body but i will not pain you 

indeed madam said he i am grieved for you at my soul 

he turned away his face with visible grief in it 

her own eyes glistened but she turned to each of us presenting one to
the other him to me as a gentleman truly deserving to be called so me
to him as your friend indeed  how was i at that instant ashamed of
myself   but nevertheless as a man of humanity detesting my friend's
baseness and desirous of doing her all manner of good offices 

mr hickman received my civilities with a coldness which however was
rather to be expected on your account than that it deserved exception on
mine and the lady invited us both to breakfast with her in the morning 
he being obliged to return the next day 

i left them together and called upon mr dorrell my attorney to
consult him upon poor belton's affairs and then went home and wrote
thus far preparative to what may occur in my breakfasting-visit in the
morning 



letter xlviii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
thursday july 27 


i went this morning according to the lady's invitation to breakfast 
and found mr hickman with her 

a good deal of heaviness and concern hung upon his countenance but he
received me with more respect than he did yesterday which i presume 
was owing to the lady's favourable character of me 

he spoke very little for i suppose they had all their talk out
yesterday and before i came this morning 

by the hints that dropped i perceived that miss howe's letter gave an
account of your interview with her at col ambrose's of your professions
to miss howe and miss howe's opinion that marrying you was the only way
now left to repair her wrongs 

mr hickman as i also gathered had pressed her in miss howe's name to
let her on her return from the isle of wight find her at a neighbouring
farm-house where neat apartments would be made ready to receive her 
she asked how long it would be before they returned and he told her it
was proposed to be no more than a fortnight out and in upon which she
said she should then perhaps have time to consider of that kind
proposal 

he had tendered her money from miss howe but could not induce her to
take any no wonder i was refused she only said that if she had
occasion she would be obliged to nobody but miss howe 

mr goddard her apothecary came in before breakfast was over at her
desire he sat down with us mr hickman asked him if he could give him
any consolation in relation to miss harlowe's recovery to carry down to
a friend who loved her as she loved her own life 

the lady said he will do very well if she will resolve upon it
herself indeed you will madam the doctor is entirely of this
opinion and has ordered nothing for you but weak jellies and innocent
cordials lest you should starve yourself and let me tell you madam 
that so much watching so little nourishment and so much grief as you
seem to indulge is enough to impair the most vigorous health and to
wear out the strongest constitution 

what sir said she can i do i have no appetite nothing you call
nourishing will stay on my stomach i do what i can and have such kind
directors in dr h and you that i should be inexcusable if i did not 

i'll give you a regimen madam replied he which i am sure the doctor
will approve of and will make physic unnecessary in your case and that
is go to rest at ten at night rise not till seven in the morning 
let your breakfast be watergruel or milk-pottage or weak broths your
dinner any thing you like so you will but eat a dish of tea with milk 
in the afternoon and sago for your supper and my life for your's this
diet and a month's country air will set you up 

we were much pleased with the worthy gentleman's disinterested regimen 
and she said referring to her nurse who vouched for her pray mr 
hickman let miss howe know the good hands i am in and as to the kind
charge of the gentleman assure her that all i promised to her in the
longest of my two last letters on the subject of my health i do and
will to the utmost of my power observe i have engaged sir to mr 
goddard i have engaged sir to me to miss howe to avoid all wilful
neglects it would be an unpardonable fault and very ill become the
character i would be glad to deserve or the temper of mind i wish my
friends hereafter to think me mistress of if i did not 

mr hickman and i went afterwards to a neighbouring coffee-house and he
gave me some account of your behaviour at the ball on monday night and
of your treatment of him in the conference he had with you before that 
which he represented in a more favourable light than you had done
yourself and yet he gave his sentiments of you with great freedom but
with the politeness of a gentleman 

he told me how very determined the lady was against marrying you that
she had early this morning set herself to write a letter to miss howe 
in answer to one he brought her which he was to call for at twelve it
being almost finished before he saw her at breakfast and that at three
he proposed to set out on his return 

he told me that miss howe and her mother and himself were to begin
their little journey for the isle of wight on monday next but that he
must make the most favourable representation of miss harlowe's bad
health or they should have a very uneasy absence he expressed the
pleasure he had in finding the lady in such good hands he proposed to
call on dr h to take his opinion whether it were likely she would
recover and hoped he should find it favourable 

as he was resolved to make the best of the matter and as the lady had
refused to accept of the money offered by mr hickman i said nothing of
her parting with her clothes i thought it would serve no other end to
mention it but to shock miss howe for it has such a sound with it that
a woman of her rank and fortune should be so reduced that i cannot
myself think of it with patience nor know i but one man in the world who
can 

this gentleman is a little finical and formal modest or diffident men
wear not soon off those little precisenesses which the confident if
ever they had them presently get above because they are too confident
to doubt any thing but i think mr hickman is an agreeable sensible
man and not at all deserving of the treatment or the character you give
him 

but you are really a strange mortal because you have advantages in your
person in your air and intellect above all the men i know and a face
that would deceive the devil you can't think any man else tolerable 

it is upon this modest principle that thou deridest some of us who not
having thy confidence in their outside appearance seek to hide their
defects by the tailor's and peruke-maker's assistance mistakenly
enough if it be really done so absurdly as to expose them more and
sayest that we do but hang out a sign in our dress of what we have in
the shop of our minds this no doubt thou thinkest is smartly
observed but pr'ythee lovelace let me tell thee if thou canst what
sort of a sign must thou hang out wert thou obliged to give us a clear
idea by it of the furniture of thy mind 

mr hickman tells me he should have been happy with miss howe some weeks
ago for all the settlements have been some time engrossed but that
she will not marry she declares while her dear friend is so unhappy 

this is truly a charming instance of the force of female friendship 
which you and i and our brother rakes have constantly ridiculed as a
chimerical thing in women of equal age and perfections 

but really lovelace i see more and more that there are not in the
world with our conceited pride narrower-souled wretches than we rakes
and libertines are and i'll tell thee how it comes about 

our early love of roguery makes us generally run away from instruction 
and so we become mere smatterers in the sciences we are put to learn 
and because we will know no more think there is no more to be known 

with an infinite deal of vanity un-reined imaginations and no judgments
at all we next commence half-wits and then think we have the whole
field of knowledge in possession and despise every one who takes more
pains and is more serious than ourselves as phlegmatic stupid
fellows who have no taste for the most poignant pleasures of life 

this makes us insufferable to men of modesty and merit and obliges us to
herd with those of our own cast and by this means we have no
opportunities of seeing or conversing with any body who could or would
show us what we are and so we conclude that we are the cleverest fellows
in the world and the only men of spirit in it and looking down with
supercilious eyes on all who gave not themselves the liberties we take 
imagine the world made for us and for us only 

thus as to useful knowledge while others go to the bottom we only skim
the surface are despised by people of solid sense of true honour and
superior talents and shutting our eyes move round and round like so
many blind mill-horses in one narrow circle while we imagine we have
all the world to range in 


 


i threw myself in mr hickman's way on his return from the lady 

he was excessively moved at taking leave of her being afraid as he said
to me though he would not tell her so that he should never see her
again she charged him to represent every thing to miss howe in the most
favourable light that the truth would bear 

he told me of a tender passage at parting which was that having saluted
her at her closet-door he could not help once more taking the same
liberty in a more fervent manner at the stairs-head whither she
accompanied him and this in the thought that it was the last time he
should ever have that honour and offering to apologize for his freedom
 for he had pressed her to his heart with a vehemence that he could
neither account for or resist excuse you mr hickman that i will 
you are my brother and my friend and to show you that the good man who
is to be happy with my beloved miss howe is very dear to me you shall
carry to her this token of my love   offering her sweet face to his
salute and pressing his hand between her's   and perhaps her love of me
will make it more agreeable to her than her punctilio would otherwise
allow it to be and tell her said she dropping on one knee with
clasped hands and uplifted eyes that in this posture you see me in the
last moment of our parting begging a blessing upon you both and that
you may be the delight and comfort of each other for many very many
happy years 

tears said he fell from my eyes i even sobbed with mingled joy and
sorrow and she retreating as soon as i raised her i went down stairs
highly dissatisfied with myself for going yet unable to stay my eyes
fixed the contrary way to my feet as long as i could behold the skirts
of her raiment 

i went to the back-shop continued the worthy man and recommended the
angelic lady to the best care of mrs smith and when i was in the
street cast my eye up at her window there for the last time i doubt 
said he that i shall ever behold her i saw her and she waved her
charming hand to me and with such a look of smiling goodness and
mingled concern as i cannot describe 

pr'ythee tell me thou vile lovelace if thou hast not a notion even
from these jejune descriptions of mine that there must be a more exalted
pleasure in intellectual friendship than ever thou couldst taste in the
gross fumes of sensuality and whether it may not be possible for thee 
in time to give that preference to the infinitely preferable which i
hope now that i shall always give 

i will leave thee to make the most of this reflection from

thy true friend 
j belford 



letter xlix

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
thursday july 25 

 text error should be tuesday 


your two affecting letters were brought to me as i had directed any
letter from you should be to the colonel's about an hour before we
broke up i could not forbear dipping into them there and shedding
more tears over them than i will tell you of although i dried my eyes
as well as i could that the company i was obliged to return to and my
mother should see as little of my concern as possible 

i am yet and was then still more excessively fluttered the occasion
i will communicate to you by-and-by for nothing but the flutters given
by the stroke of death could divert my first attention from the sad and
solemn contents of your last favour these therefore i must begin with 

how can i bear the thoughts of losing so dear a friend i will not so
much as suppose it indeed i cannot such a mind as your's was not
vested in humanity to be snatched away from us so soon there must still
be a great deal for you to do for the good of all who have the happiness
to know you 

you enumerate in your letter of thursday last the particulars in which
your situation is already mended let me see by effects that you are in
earnest in that enumeration and that you really have the courage to
resolve to get above the sense of injuries you could not avoid and then
will i trust to providence and my humble prayers for your perfect
recovery and glad at my heart shall i be on my return from the little
island to find you well enough to be near us according to the proposal
mr hickman has to make to you 


 see vol vii letter xxv 


you chide me in your's of sunday on the freedom i take with your
friends 


 ibid letter xlii 


i may be warm i know i am too warm yet warmth in friendship surely 
cannot be a crime especially when our friend has great merit labours
under oppression and is struggling with undeserved calamity 

i have no opinion of coolness in friendship be it dignified or
distinguished by the name of prudence or what it will 

you may excuse your relations it was ever your way to do so but my
dear other people must be allowed to judge as they please i am not
their daughter nor the sister of your brother and sister i thank
heaven i am not 

but if you are displeased with me for the freedoms i took so long ago as
you mention i am afraid if you knew what passed upon an application i
made to your sister very lately in hopes to procure you the absolution
your heart is so much set upon that you would be still more concerned 
but they have been even with me but i must not tell you all i hope 
however that these unforgivers  my mother is among them  were always
good dutiful passive children to their parents 

once more forgive me i owned i was too warm but i have no example to
the contrary but from you and the treatment you meet with is very little
encouragement to me to endeavour to imitate you in your dutiful meekness 

you leave it to me to give a negative to the hopes of the noble family 
whose only disgrace is that so very vile a man is so nearly related to
them but yet alas my dear i am so fearful of consequences so
selfishly fearful if this negative must be given i don't know what i
should say but give me leave to suspend however this negative till i
hear from you again 

this earnest courtship of you into their splendid family is so very
honourable to you they so justly admire you you must have had such a
noble triumph over the base man he is so much in earnest the world
knows so much of the unhappy affair you may do still so much good your
will is so inviolate your relations are so implacable think my dear 
and re-think 

and let me leave you to do so while i give you the occasion of the
flutter i mentioned at the beginning of this letter in the conclusion
of which you will find the obligation i have consented to lay myself
under to refer this important point once more to your discussion before
i give in your name the negative that cannot when given be with
honour to yourself repented of or recalled 

know then my dear that i accompanied my mother to colonel ambrose's on
the occasion i mentioned to you in my former many ladies and gentlemen
were there whom you know particularly miss kitty d'oily miss lloyd 
miss biddy d'ollyffe miss biddulph and their respective admirers with
the colonel's two nieces fine women both besides many whom you know
not for they were strangers to me but by name a splendid company and
all pleased with one another till colonel ambrose introduced one who 
the moment he was brought into the great hall set the whole assembly
into a kind of agitation 

it was your villain 

i thought i should have sunk as soon as i set my eyes upon him my
mother was also affected and coming to me nancy whispered she can
you bear the sight of that wretch without too much emotion if not 
withdraw into the next apartment 

i could not remove every body's eyes were glanced from him to me i
sat down and fanned myself and was forced to order a glass of water 
oh that i had the eye the basilisk is reported to have thought i and
that his life were within the power of it directly would i kill him 

he entered with an air so hateful to me but so agreeable to every other
eye that i could have looked him dead for that too 

after the general salutations he singled out mr hickman and told him he
had recollected some parts of his behaviour to him when he saw him last 
which had made him think himself under obligation to his patience and
politeness 

and so indeed he was 

miss d'oily upon his complimenting her among a knot of ladies asked
him in their hearing how miss clarissa harlowe did 

he heard he said you were not so well as he wished you to be and as
you deserved to be 

o mr lovelace said she what have you to answer for on that young
lady's account if all be true that i have heard 

i have a great deal to answer for said the unblushing villain but that
dear lady has so many excellencies and so much delicacy that little
sins are great ones in her eye 

little sins replied miss d'oily mr lovelace's character is so well
known that nobody believes he can commit little sins 

you are very good to me miss d'oily 

indeed i am not 

then i am the only person to whom you are not very good and so i am the
less obliged to you 

he turned with an unconcerned air to miss playford and made her some
genteel compliments i believe you know her not she visits his cousins
montague indeed he had something in his specious manner to say to every
body and this too soon quieted the disgust each person had at his
entrance 

i still kept my seat and he either saw me not or would not yet see me 
and addressing himself to my mother taking her unwilling hand with an
air of high assurance i am glad to see you here madam i hope miss howe
is well i have reason to complain greatly of her but hope to owe to
her the highest obligation that can be laid on man 

my daughter sir is accustomed to be too warm and too zealous in her
friendships for either my tranquility or her own 

there had indeed been some late occasion given for mutual displeasure
between my mother and me but i think she might have spared this to him 
though nobody heard it i believe but the person to whom it was spoken 
and the lady who told it me for my mother spoke it low 

we are not wholly madam to live for ourselves said the vile hypocrite 
it is not every one who had a soul capable of friendship and what a
heart must that be which can be insensible to the interests of a
suffering friend 

this sentiment from mr lovelace's mouth said my mother forgive me 
sir but you can have no end surely in endeavouring to make me think as
well of you as some innocent creatures have thought of you to their cost 

she would have flung from him but detaining her hand less severe 
dear madam said he be less severe in this place i beseech you you
will allow that a very faulty person may see his errors and when he
does and owns them and repents should he not be treated mercifully 

your air sir seems not to be that of a penitent but the place may as
properly excuse this subject as what you call my severity 

but dearest madam permit me to say that i hope for your interest with
your charming daughter was his syncophant word to have it put in my
power to convince all the world that there never was a truer penitent 
and why why this anger dear madam for she struggled to get her hand
out of his these violent airs so maidenly  impudent fellow   may i
not ask if miss howe be here 

she would not have been here replied my mother had she known whom she
had been to see 

and is she here then thank heaven he disengaged her hand and stept
forward into company 

dear miss lloyd said he with an air taking her hand as he quitted my
mother's tell me tell me is miss arabella harlowe here or will she
be here i was informed she would and this and the opportunity of
paying my compliments to your friend miss howe were great inducements
with me to attend the colonel 

superlative assurance was it not my dear 

miss arabella harlowe excuse me sir said miss lloyd would be very
little inclined to meet you here or any where else 

perhaps so my dear miss lloyd but perhaps for that very reason i am
more desirous to see her 

miss harlowe sir and miss biddulph with a threatening air will hardly
be here without her brother i imagine if one comes both will come 

heaven grant they both may said the wretch nothing miss biddulph 
shall begin from me to disturb this assembly i assure you if they do 
one calm half-hour's conversation with that brother and sister would be
a most fortunate opportunity to me in presence of the colonel and his
lady or whom else they should choose 

then turning round as if desirous to find out the one or the other he
spied me and with a very low bow approached me 

i was all in a flutter you may suppose he would have taken my hand i
refused it all glowing with indignation every body's eyes upon us 

i went down from him to the other end of the room and sat down as i
thought out of his hated sight but presently i heard his odious voice 
whispering behind my chair he leaning upon the back of it with
impudent unconcern charming miss howe looking over my shoulder one
request  i started up from my seat but could hardly stand neither for
very indignation  o this sweet but becoming disdain whispered on the
insufferable creature i am sorry to give you all this emotion but
either here or at your own house let me entreat from you one quarter of
an hour's audience i beseech you madam but one quarter of an hour in
any of the adjoining apartments 

not for a kingdom fluttering my fan i knew not what i did but i
could have killed him 

we are so much observed else on my knees my dear miss howe would i beg
your interest with your charming friend 

she'll have nothing to say to you 

 i had not then your letters my dear 

killing words but indeed i have deserved them and a dagger in my heart
besides i am so conscious of my demerits that i have no hope but in
your interposition could i owe that favour to miss howe's mediation
which i cannot hope for on any other account 

my mediation vilest of men my mediation i abhor you from my soul 
i abhor you vilest of men three or four times i repeated these words 
stammering too i was excessively fluttered 

you can tell me nothing madam so bad as i will call myself i have
been indeed the vilest of men but now i am not so permit me every
body's eyes are upon us but one moment's audience to exchange but ten
words with you dearest miss howe in whose presence you please for your
dear friend's sake but ten words with you in the next apartment 

it is an insult upon me to presume that i would exchange with you if i
could help it out of my way out of my sight fellow 

and away i would have flung but he took my hand i was excessively
disordered every body's eyes more and more intent upon us 

mr hickman whom my mother had drawn on one side to enjoin him a
patience which perhaps needed not to have been enforced came up just
then with my mother who had him by his leading-strings by his sleeve
i should say 

mr hickman said the bold wretch be my advocate but for ten words in
the next apartment with miss howe in your presence and in your's 
madam to my mother 

hear nancy what he has to say to you to get rid of him hear his ten
words 

excuse me madam his very breath unhand me sir 

he sighed and looked o how the practised villain sighed and looked he
then let go my hand with such a reverence in his manner as brought
blame upon me from some that i would not hear him and this incensed me
the more o my dear this man is a devil this man is indeed a devil 
so much patience when he pleases so much gentleness yet so resolute 
so persisting so audacious 

i was going out of the assembly in great disorder he was at the door as
soon as i 

how kind this is said the wretch and ready to follow me opened the
door for me 

i turned back upon this and not knowing what i did snapped my fan just
in his face as he turned short upon me and the powder flew from his
hair 

every body seemed as much pleased as i was vexed 

he turned to mr hickman nettled at the powder flying and at the smiles
of the company upon him mr hickman you will be one of the happiest men
in the world because you are a good man and will do nothing to provoke
this passionate lady and because she has too much good sense to be
provoked without reason but else the lord have mercy upon you 

this man this mr hickman my dear is too meek for a man indeed he
is but my patient mother twits me that her passionate daughter ought
to like him the better for that but meek men abroad are not always meek
at home i have observed that in more instances than one and if they
were i should not i verily think like them the better for being so 

he then turned to my mother resolved to be even with her too where 
good madam could miss howe get all this spirit 

the company around smiled for i need not tell you that my mother's high
spiritedness is pretty well known and she sadly vexed said sir you
treat me as you do the rest of the world but 

i beg pardon madam interrupted he i might have spared my question and
instantly i retiring to the other end of the hall he turned to miss
playford what would i give madam to hear you sing that song you
obliged us with at lord m s 

he then as if nothing had happened fell into a conversation with her
and miss d'ollyffe upon music and whisperingly sung to miss playford 
holding her two hands with such airs of genteel unconcern that it vexed
me not a little to look round and see how pleased half the giddy fools
of our sex were with him notwithstanding his notorious wicked character 
to this it is that such vile fellows owe much of their vileness whereas 
if they found themselves shunned and despised and treated as beasts of
prey as they are they would run to their caverns there howl by
themselves and none but such as sad accident or unpitiable presumption 
threw in their way would suffer by them 

he afterwards talked very seriously at times to mr hickman at times 
i say for it was with such breaks and starts of gaiety turning to this
lady and to that and then to mr hickman again resuming a serious or
a gay air at pleasure that he took every body's eye the women's
especially who were full of their whispering admirations of him 
qualified with if's and but's and what pity's and such sort of stuff 
that showed in their very dispraises too much liking 

well may our sex be the sport and ridicule of such libertines 
unthinking eye-governed creatures would not a little reflection teach
us that a man of merit must be a man of modesty because a diffident
one and that such a wretch as this must have taken his degrees in
wickedness and gone through a course of vileness before he could arrive
at this impenetrable effrontery an effrontery which can produce only
from the light opinion he has of us and the high one of himself 

but our sex are generally modest and bashful themselves and are too apt
to consider that which in the main is their principal grace as a defect 
and finely do they judge when they think of supplying that defect by
choosing a man that cannot be ashamed 

his discourse to mr hickman turned upon you and his acknowledged
injuries of you though he could so lightly start from the subject and
return to it 

i have no patience with such a devil man he cannot be called to be
sure he would behave in the same manner any where or in any presence 
even at the altar itself if a woman were with him there 

it shall ever be a rule with me that he who does not regard a woman with
some degree of reverence will look upon her and occasionally treat her
with contempt 

he had the confidence to offer to take me out but i absolutely refused
him and shunned him all i could putting on the most contemptuous airs 
but nothing could mortify him 

i wished twenty times i had not been there 

the gentlemen were as ready as i to wish he had broken his neck rather
than been present i believe for nobody was regarded but he so little
of the fop yet so elegant and rich in his dress his person so specious 
his air so intrepid so much meaning and penetration in his face so much
gaiety yet so little affectation no mere toupet-man but all manly and
his courage and wit the one so known the other so dreaded you must
think the petits-maitres of which there were four or five present were
most deplorably off in his company and one grave gentleman observed to
me pleased to see me shun him as i did that the poet's observation
was too true that the generality of ladies were rakes in their hearts 
or they could not be so much taken with a man who had so notorious a
character 

i told him the reflection both of the poet and applier was much too
general and made with more ill-nature than good manners 

when the wretch saw how industriously i avoided him shifting from one
part of the hall to another he at last boldly stept up to me as my
mother and mr hickman were talking to me and thus before them accosted
me 

i beg your pardon madam but by your mother's leave i must have a few
moments' conversation with you either here or at your own house and i
beg you will give me the opportunity 

nancy said my mother hear what he has to say to you in my presence
you may and better in the adjoining apartment if it must be than to
come to you at our own house 

i retired to one corner of the hall my mother following me and he 
taking mr hickman under his arm following her well sir said i what
have you to say tell me here 

i have been telling mr hickman said he how much i am concerned for the
injuries i have done to the most excellent woman in the world and yet 
that she obtained such a glorious triumph over me the last time i had the
honour to see her as with my penitence ought to have abated her former
resentments but that i will with all my soul enter into any measures
to obtain her forgiveness of me my cousins montague have told you this 
lady betty and lady sarah and my lord m are engaged for my honour i
know your power with the dear creature my cousins told me you gave them
hopes you would use it in my behalf my lord m and his two sisters are
impatiently expecting the fruits of it you must have heard from her
before now i hope you have and will you be so good as to tell me if i
may have any hopes 

if i must speak on this subject let me tell you that you have broken her
heart you know not the value of the lady you have injured you deserve
her not and she despises you as she ought 

dear miss howe mingle not passion with denunciations so severe i must
know my fate i will go abroad once more if i find her absolutely
irreconcileable but i hope she will give me leave to attend upon her 
to know my doom from her own mouth 

it would be death immediate for her to see you and what must you be to
be able to look her in the face 

i then reproached him with vehemence enough you may believe on his
baseness and the evils he had made you suffer the distress he had
reduced you to all your friends made your enemies the vile house he had
carried you to hinted at his villanous arts the dreadful arrest and
told him of your present deplorable illness and resolution to die rather
than to have him 

he vindicated not any part of his conduct but that of the arrest and so
solemnly protested his sorrow for his usage of you accusing himself in
the freest manner and by deserved appellations that i promised to lay
before you this part of our conversation and now you have it 

my mother as well as mr hickman believes from what passed on this
occasion that he is touched in conscience for the wrongs he has done
you but by his whole behaviour i must own it seems to me that nothing
can touch him for half an hour together yet i have no doubt that he
would willingly marry you and it piques his pride i could see that he
should be denied as it did mine that such a wretch had dared to think
it in his power to have such a woman whenever he pleased and that it
must be accounted a condescension and matter of obligation by all his
own family at least that he would vouchsafe to think of marriage 

now my dear you have before you the reason why i suspend the decisive
negative to the ladies of his family my mother miss lloyd and miss
biddulph who were inquisitive after the subject of our retired
conversation and whose curiosity i thought it was right in some degree 
to gratify especially as these young ladies are of our select
acquaintance are all of opinion that you should be his 

you will let mr hickman know your whole mind and when he acquaint me
with it i will tell you all my own 

mean time may the news he will bring me of the state of your health be
favourable prays with the utmost fervency 

your ever faithful and affectionate
anna howe 



letter l

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
thursday july 27 


my dearest miss howe 

after i have thankfully acknowledged your favour in sending mr hickman
to visit me before you set out upon your intended journey i must chide
you in the sincerity of that faithful love which could not be the love
it is if it would not admit of that cementing freedom for suspending the
decisive negative which upon such full deliberation i had entreated
you to give to mr lovelace's relations 

i am sorry that i am obliged to repeat to you my dear who know me so
well that were i sure i should live many years i would not have mr 
lovelace much less can i think of him as it is probable i may not live
one 

as to the world and its censures you know my dear that however
desirous i always was of a fair fame yet i never thought it right to
give more than a second place to the world's opinion the challenges
made to mr lovelace by miss d'oily in public company are a fresh
proof that i have lost my reputation and what advantage would it be to
me were it retrievable and were i to live long if i could not acquit
myself to myself 

having in my former said so much on the freedoms you have taken with my
friends i shall say the less now but your hint that something else has
newly passed between some of them and you gives me great concern and
that as well for my own sake as for theirs since it must necessarily
incense them against me i wise my dear that i had been left to my own
course on an occasion so very interesting to myself but since what is
done cannot be helped i must abide the consequences yet i dread more
than before what may be my sister's answer if an answer will be at all
vouchsafed 

will you give me leave my dear to close this subject with one remark 
 it is this that my beloved friend in points where her own laudable
zeal is concerned has ever seemed more ready to fly from the rebuke 
than from the fault if you will excuse this freedom i will acknowledge
thus far in favour of your way of thinking as to the conduct of some
parents in these nice cases that indiscreet opposition does frequently
as much mischief as giddy love 

as to the invitation you are so kind as to give me to remove privately
into your neighbourhood i have told mr hickman that i will consider of
it but believe if you will be so good as to excuse me that i shall not
accept of it even should i be able to remove i will give you my
reasons for declining it and so i ought when both my love and my
gratitude would make a visit now-and-then from my dear miss howe the most
consolate thing in the world to me 

you must know then that this great town wicked as it is wants not
opportunities of being better having daily prayers at several churches
in it and i am desirous as my strength will permit to embrace those
opportunities the method i have proposed to myself and was beginning
to practise when that cruel arrest deprived me of both freedom and
strength is this when i was disposed to gentle exercise i took a chair
to st dunstan's church in fleet-street where are prayers at seven in
the morning i proposed if the weather favoured to walk if not to take
chair to lincoln's-inn chapel where at eleven in the morning and at
five in the afternoon are the same desirable opportunities and at other
times to go no farther than covent-garden church where are early morning
prayers likewise 

this method pursued i doubt not will greatly help as it has already
done to calm my disturbed thoughts and to bring me to that perfect
resignation after which i aspire for i must own my dear that sometimes
still my griefs and my reflections are too heavy for me and all the aid
i can draw from religious duties is hardly sufficient to support my
staggering reason i am a very young creature you know my dear to be
left to my own conduct in such circumstances as i am in 

another reason why i choose not to go down into your neighbourhood is
the displeasure that might arise on my account between your mother and
you 

if indeed you were actually married and the worthy man who would then
have a title to all your regard were earnestly desirous of near
neighbourhood i know not what i might do for although i might not
perhaps intend to give up my other important reasons at the time i should
make you a congratulatory visit yet i might not know how to deny myself
the pleasure of continuing near you when there 

i send you enclosed the copy of my letter to my sister i hope it will
be thought to be written with a true penitent spirit for indeed it is 
i desire that you will not think i stoop too low in it since there can
be no such thing as that in a child to parents whom she has unhappily
offended 

but if still perhaps more disgusted than before at your freedom with
them they should pass it by with the contempt of silence for i have
not yet been favoured with an answer i must learn to think it right in
them to do so especially as it is my first direct application for i
have often censured the boldness of those who applying for a favour 
which it is in a person's option to grant or refuse take the liberty of
being offended if they are not gratified as if the petitioned had not
as good a right to reject as the petitioner to ask 

but if my letter should be answered and that in such terms as will make
me loth to communicate it to so warm a friend you must not my dear 
take it upon yourself to censure my relations but allow for them as they
know not what i have suffered as being filled with just resentments
against me just to them if they think them just and as not being able
to judge of the reality of my penitence 

and after all what can they do for me they can only pity me and what
will that but augment their own grief to which at present their
resentment is an alleviation for can they by their pity restore to me my
lost reputation can they by it purchase a sponge that will wipe out
from the year the past fatal four months of my life 


 she takes in the time that she appointed to meet mr lovelace 


your account of the gay unconcerned behaviour of mr lovelace at the
colonel's does not surprise me at all after i am told that he had the
intrepidity to go there knowing who were invited and expected only
this my dear i really wonder at that miss howe could imagine that i
could have a thought of such a man for a husband 

poor wretch i pity him to see him fluttering about abusing talents
that were given him for excellent purposes taking in consideration for
courage and dancing fearless of danger on the edge of a precipice 

but indeed his threatening to see me most sensibly alarms and shocks me 
i cannot but hope that i never never more shall see him in this world 

since you are so loth my dear to send the desired negative to the
ladies of his family i will only trouble you to transmit the letter i
shall enclose for that purpose directed indeed to yourself because it
was to you that those ladies applied themselves on this occasion but to
be sent by you to any one of the ladies at your own choice 

i commend myself my dearest miss howe to your prayers and conclude
with repeated thanks for sending mr hickman to me and with wishes for
your health and happiness and for the speedy celebration of your
nuptials 

your ever affectionate and obliged 
clarissa harlowe 



letter li

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
 enclosed in the preceding  
thursday july 27 


my dearest miss howe 

since you seem loth to acquiesce in my determined resolution signified
to you as soon as i was able to hold a pen i beg the favour of you by
this or by any other way you think most proper to acquaint the worthy
ladies who have applied to you in behalf of their relation that
although i am infinitely obliged to their generous opinion of me yet i
cannot consent to sanctify as i may say mr lovelace's repeated
breaches of all moral sanctions and hazard my future happiness by a
union with a man through whose premeditated injuries in a long train of
the basest contrivances i have forfeited my temporal hopes 

he himself when he reflects upon his own actions must surely bear
testimony to the justice as well as fitness of my determination the
ladies i dare say would were they to know the whole of my unhappy
story 

be pleased to acquaint them that i deceive myself if my resolution on
this head however ungratefully and even inhumanely he has treated me be
not owing more to principle than passion nor can i give a stronger
proof of the truth of this assurance on this one easy condition that he
will never molest me more 

in whatever way you choose to make this declaration be pleased to let my
most respectful compliments to the ladies of that noble family and to my
lord m accompany it and do you my dear believe that i shall be to
the last moment of my life 

your ever obliged and affectionate
clarissa harlowe 



letter lii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
friday july 28 


i have three letters of thine to take notice of but am divided in my
mind whether to quarrel with thee on thy unmerciful reflections or to
thank thee for thy acceptable particularity and diligence but several
of my sweet dears have i indeed in my time made to cry and laugh
before the cry could go off the other why may i not therefore curse
and applaud thee in the same moment so take both in one and what
follows as it shall rise from my pen 


 letters xlvi xlvii and xlviii of this volume 


how often have i ingenuously confessed my sins against this excellent
creature yet thou never sparest me although as bad a man as myself 
since then i get so little by my confessions i had a good mind to try to
defend myself and that not only from antient and modern story but from
common practice and yet avoid repeating any thing i have suggested
before in my own behalf 

i am in a humour to play the fool with my pen briefly then from antient
story first dost thou not think that i am as much entitled to
forgiveness on miss harlowe's account as virgil's hero was on queen
dido's for what an ungrateful varlet was that vagabond to the
hospitable princess who had willingly conferred upon him the last
favour stealing away whence i suppose the ironical phrase of trusty
trojan to this day like a thief pretendedly indeed at the command of
the gods but could that be when the errand he went upon was to rob
other princes not only of their dominions but of their lives yet this
fellow is at every word the pious aeneas with the immortal bard who
celebrates him 

should miss harlowe even break her heart which heaven forbid for the
usage she has received to say nothing of her disappointed pride to
which her death would be attributable more than to reason what
comparison will her fate hold to queen dido's and have i half the
obligation to her that aeneas had to the queen of carthage the latter
placing a confidence the former none in her man then whom else have
i robbed whom else have i injured her brother's worthless life i gave
him instead of taking any man's while the trojan vagabond destroyed his
thousands why then should it not be the pious lovelace as well as the
pious aeneas for dost thou think had a conflagration happened and had
it been in my power that i would not have saved my old anchises as he
did his from the ilion bonfire even at the expense of my creusa had i
a wife of that name 

but for a more modern instance in my favour have i used miss harlowe as
our famous maiden queen as she was called used one of her own blood a
sister-queen who threw herself into her protection from her
rebel-subjects and whom she detained prisoner eighteen years and at
last cut off her head yet do not honest protestants pronounce her pious
too and call her particularly their queen 

as to common practice who let me ask that has it in his power to
gratify a predominant passion be it what it will denies himself the
gratification leaving it to cooler deliberation and if he be a great
man to his flatterers to find a reason for it afterwards 

then as to the worst part of my treatment of this lady how many men are
there who as well as i have sought by intoxicating liquors first to
inebriate then to subdue what signifies what the potations were when
the same end was in view 

let me tell thee upon the whole that neither the queen of carthage nor
the queen of scots would have thought they had any reason to complain of
cruelty had they been used no worse than i have used the queen of my
heart and then do i not aspire with my whole soul to repair by marriage 
would the pious aeneas thinkest thou have done such a piece of justice
by dido had she lived 

come come belford let people run away with notions as they will i am
comparatively a very innocent man and if by these and other like
reasonings i have quieted my own conscience a great end is answered 
what have i to do with the world 

and now i sit me peaceably down to consider thy letters 

i hope thy pleas in my favour when she gave thee so generously gave
thee for me my letters were urged with an honest energy but i
suspect thee much for being too ready to give up thy client then thou
hast such a misgiving aspect an aspect rather inviting rejection than
carrying persuasion with it and art such an hesitating such a humming
and hawing caitiff that i shall attribute my failure if i do fail 
rather to the inability and ill looks of my advocate than to my cause 
again thou art deprived of the force men of our cast give to arguments 
for she won't let thee swear -art moreover a very heavy thoughtless
fellow tolerable only at a second rebound a horrid dunce at the
impromptu these encountering with such a lady are great
disadvantages and still a greater is thy balancing as thou dost at
present between old rakery and new reformation since this puts thee
into the same situation with her as they told me at leipsick martin
luther was in at the first public dispute which he held in defence of
his supposed new doctrines with eckius for martin was then but a
linsey-wolsey reformer he retained some dogmas which by natural
consequence made others that he held untenable so that eckius in
some points had the better of him but from that time he made clear
work renouncing all that stood in his way and then his doctrines ran
upon all fours he was never puzzled afterwards and could boldly
declare that he would defend them in the face of angels and men and to
his friends who would have dissuaded him from venturing to appear before
the emperor charles at spires that were there as many devils at spires 
as tiles upon the houses he would go an answer that is admired by
every protestant saxon to this day 


 see letter xlvii of this volume 


since then thy unhappy awkwardness destroys the force of thy arguments i
think thou hadst better for the present however forbear to urge her on
the subject of accepting the reparation i offer lest the continual
teasing of her to forgive me should but strengthen her in her denials of
forgiveness till for consistency sake she'll be forced to adhere to a
resolution so often avowed whereas if left to herself a little time 
and better health which will bring on better spirits will give her
quicker resentments those quicker resentments will lead her into
vehemence that vehemence will subside and turn into expostulation and
parley my friends will then interpose and guaranty for me and all our
trouble on both sides will be over such is the natural course of
things 

i cannot endure thee for thy hopelessness in the lady's recovery and
that in contradiction to the doctor and apothecary 


 see letter xlvii of this volume 


time in the words of congreve thou sayest will give increase to her
afflictions but why so knowest thou not that those words so contrary
to common experience were applied to the case of a person while passion
was in its full vigour at such a time every one in a heavy grief
thinks the same but as enthusiasts do by scripture so dost thou by the
poets thou hast read any thing that carries the most distant allusion
from either to the case in hand is put down by both for gospel however
incongruous to the general scope of either and to that case so once 
in a pulpit i heard one of the former very vehemently declare himself to
be a dead dog when every man woman and child were convinced to the
contrary by his howling 

i can tell thee that if nothing else will do i am determined in spite
of thy buskin-airs and of thy engagements for me to the contrary to see
her myself 

face to face have i known many a quarrel made up which distance would
have kept alive and widened thou wilt be a madder jack than he in the
tale of a tub if thou givest an active opposition to this interview 

in short i cannot bear the thought that a woman whom once i had bound
to me in the silken cords of love should slip through my fingers and be
able while my heart flames out with a violent passion for her to
despise me and to set both love and me at defiance thou canst not
imagine how much i envy thee and her doctor and her apothecary and
every one who i hear are admitted to her presence and conversation and
wish to be the one or the other in turn 

wherefore if nothing else will do i will see her i'll tell thee of an
admirable expedient just come cross me to save thy promise and my own 

mrs lovick you say is a good woman if the lady be worse you shall
advise her to send for a parson to pray by her unknown to her unknown
to the lady unknown to thee for so it may pass i will contrive to be
the man petticoated out and vested in a gown and cassock i once for
a certain purpose did assume the canonicals and i was thought to make a
fine sleek appearance my broad rose-bound beaver became me mightily and
i was much admired upon the whole by all who saw me 

methinks it must be charmingly a propos to see me kneeling down by her
bed-side i am sure i shall pray heartily beginning out of the
common-prayer book the sick-office for the restoration of the languishing
lady and concluding with an exhortation to charity and forgiveness for
myself 

i will consider of this matter but in whatever shape i shall choose to
appear of this thou mayest assure thyself i will apprize thee
beforehand of my visit that thou mayst contrive to be out of the way 
and to know nothing of the matter this will save thy word and as to
mine can she think worse of me than she does at present 

an indispensable of true love and profound respect in thy wise opinion 
is absurdity or awkwardness tis surprising that thou shouldst be one
of those partial mortals who take their measures of right and wrong from
what they find themselves to be and cannot help being so awkwardness
is a perfection in the awkward at this rate no man ever can be in the
wrong but i insist upon it that an awkward fellow will do every thing
awkwardly and if he be like thee will when he has done foolishly 
rack his unmeaning brain for excuses as awkward as his first fault 
respectful love is an inspirer of actions worthy of itself and he who
cannot show it where he most means it manifests that he is an unpolite
rough creature a perfect belford and has it not in him 


 see letter xlvi of this volume 


but here thou'lt throw out that notable witticism that my outside is the
best of me thine the worst of thee and that if i set about mending my
mind thou wilt mend thy appearance 

but pr'ythee jack don't stay for that but set about thy amendment in
dress when thou leavest off thy mourning for why shouldst thou
prepossess in thy disfavour all those who never saw thee before it is
hard to remove early-taken prejudices whether of liking or distaste 
people will hunt as i may say for reasons to confirm first impressions 
in compliment to their own sagacity nor is it every mind that has the
ingenuousness to confess itself half mistaken when it finds itself to be
wrong thou thyself art an adept in the pretended science of reading
men and whenever thou art out wilt study to find some reasons why it
was more probable that thou shouldst have been right and wilt watch
every motion and action and every word and sentiment in the person thou
hast once censured for proofs in order to help thee to revive and
maintain thy first opinion and indeed as thou seldom errest on the
favourable side human nature is so vile a thing that thou art likely to
be right five times in six on what thou findest in thine own heart to
have reason to compliment thyself on thy penetration 

here is preachment for thy preachment and i hope if thou likest thy
own thou wilt thank me for mine the rather as thou mayest be the
better for it if thou wilt since it is calculated for thy own meridian 

well but the lady refers my destiny to the letter she has written 
actually written to miss howe to whom it seems she has given her
reasons why she will not have me i long to know the contents of this
letter but am in great hopes that she has so expressed her denials as
shall give room to think she only wants to be persuaded to the contrary 
in order to reconcile herself to herself 

i could make some pretty observations upon one or two places of the
lady's mediation but wicked as i am thought to be i never was so
abandoned as to turn into ridicule or even to treat with levity things
sacred i think it the highest degree of ill manners to jest upon those
subjects which the world in general look upon with veneration and call
divine i would not even treat the mythology of the heathen to a
heathen with the ridicule that perhaps would fairly lie from some of the
absurdities that strike every common observer nor when at rome and in
other popish countries did i ever behave indecently at those ceremonies
which i thought very extraordinary for i saw some people affected and
seemingly edified by them and i contented myself to think though they
were any good end to the many there was religion enough in them or
civil policy at least to exempt them from the ridicule of even a bad man
who had common sense and good manners 

for the like reason i have never given noisy or tumultuous instances of
dislike to a new play if i thought it ever so indifferent for i
concluded first that every one was entitled to see quietly what he paid
for and next as the theatre the epitome of the world consisted of
pit boxes and gallery it was hard i thought if there could be such a
performance exhibited as would not please somebody in that mixed
multitude and if it did those somebodies had as much right to enjoy
their own judgments undisturbedly as i had to enjoy mine 

this was my way of showing my disapprobation i never went again and as
a man is at his option whether he will go to a play or not he has not
the same excuse for expressing his dislike clamorously as if he were
compelled to see it 

i have ever thou knowest declared against those shallow libertines who
could not make out their pretensions to wit but on two subjects to
which every man of true wit will scorn to be beholden profaneness and
obscenity i mean which must shock the ears of every man or woman of
sense without answering any end but of showing a very low and abandoned
nature and till i came acquainted with the brutal mowbray  no great
praise to myself from such a tutor   i was far from making so free as i
do now with oaths and curses for then i was forced to out-swear him
sometimes in order to keep him in his allegiance to me his general nay 
i often check myself to myself for this empty unprofitable liberty of
speech in which we are outdone by the sons of the common-sewer 

all my vice is women and the love of plots and intrigues and i cannot
but wonder how i fell into those shocking freedoms of speech since 
generally speaking they are far from helping forward my main end only 
now-and-then indeed a little novice rises to one's notice who seems to
think dress and oaths and curses the diagnostics of the rakish spirit
she is inclined to favour and indeed they are the only qualifications
that some who are called rakes and pretty fellows have to boast of but
what must the women be who can be attracted by such empty-souled
profligates since wickedness with wit is hardly tolerable but without
it is equally shocking and contemptible 

there again is preachment for thy preachment and thou wilt be apt to
think that i am reforming too but no such matter if this were new
light darting in upon me as thy morality seems to be to thee something
of this kind might be apprehended but this was always my way of
thinking and i defy thee or any of thy brethren to name a time when i
have either ridiculed religion or talked obscenely on the contrary 
thou knowest how often i have checked that bear in love-matters 
mowbray and the finical tourville and thyself too for what ye have
called the double-entendre in love as in points that required a
manly-resentment it has always been my maxim to act rather than to
talk and i do assure thee as to the first the women themselves will
excuse the one sooner than the other 

as to the admiration thou expressest for the books of scripture thou art
certainly right in it but tis strange to me that thou wert ignorant
of their beauty and noble simplicity till now their antiquity always
made me reverence them and how was it possible that thou couldest not 
for that reason if for no other give them a perusal 

i'll tell thee a short story which i had from my tutor admonishing me
against exposing myself by ignorant wonder when i should quit college 
to go to town or travel 

the first time dryden's alexander's feast fell into his hands he told
me he was prodigiously charmed with it and having never heard any body
speak of it before thought as thou dost of the bible that he had made
a new discovery 

he hastened to an appointment which he had with several wits for he
was then in town one of whom was a noted critic who according to him 
had more merit than good fortune for all the little nibblers in wit 
whose writings would not stand the test of criticism made it he said a
common cause to run him down as men would a mad dog 

the young gentleman for young he then was set forth magnificently in
the praises of that inimitable performance and gave himself airs of
second-hand merit for finding out its beauties 

the old bard heard him out with a smile which the collegian took for
approbation till he spoke and then it was in these mortifying words 
sdeath sir where have you lived till now or with what sort of company
have you conversed young as you are that you have never before heard of
the finest piece in the english language 

this story had such an effect upon me who had ever a proud heart and
wanted to be thought a clever fellow that in order to avoid the like
disgrace i laid down two rules to myself the first whenever i went
into company where there were strangers to hear every one of them speak 
before i gave myself liberty to prate the other if i found any of them
above my match to give up all title to new discoveries contenting
myself to praise what they praised as beauties familiar to me though i
had never heard of them before and so by degrees i got the reputation
of a wit myself and when i threw off all restraint and books and
learned conversation and fell in with some of our brethren who are now
wandering in erebus and with such others as belton mowbray tourville 
and thyself i set up on my own stock and like what we have been told
of sir richard in his latter days valued myself on being the emperor of
the company for having fathomed the depth of them all and afraid of no
rival but thee whom also i had got a little under by my gaiety and
promptitude at least i proudly like addison's cato delighted to give
laws to my little senate 

proceed with thee by-and-by 



letter liii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


but now i have cleared myself of any intentional levity on occasion of my
beloved's meditation which as you observe is finely suited to her
case that is to say as she and you have drawn her case i cannot help
expressing my pleasure that by one or two verses of it  the arrow 
jack and what she feared being come upon her   i am encouraged to hope 
what it will be very surprising to me if it do not happen that is in
plain english that the dear creature is in the way to be a mamma 

this cursed arrest because of the ill effects the terror might have had
upon her in that hoped-for circumstance has concerned me more than on
any other account it would be the pride of my life to prove in this
charming frost-piece the triumph of nature over principle and to have a
young lovelace by such an angel and then for its sake i am confident
she will live and will legitimate it and what a meritorious little
cherub would it be that should lay an obligation upon both parents
before it was born which neither of them would be able to repay could
i be sure it is so i should be out of all pain for her recovery pain i
say since were she to die  die abominable word how i hate it   i
verily think i should be the most miserable man in the world 

as for the earnestness she expresses for death she has found the words
ready to her hand in honest job else she would not have delivered
herself with such strength and vehemence 

her innate piety as i have more than once observed will not permit her
to shorten her own life either by violence or neglect she has a mind
too noble for that and would have done it before now had she designed
any such thing for to do it like the roman matron when the mischief is
over and it can serve no end and when the man however a tarquin as
some may think me in this action is not a tarquin in power so that no
national point can be made of it is what she has too much good sense to
think of 

then as i observed in a like case a little while ago the distress 
when this was written was strong upon her and she saw no end of it but
all was darkness and apprehension before her moreover has she it not
in her power to disappoint as much as she has been disappointed 
revenge jack has induced many a woman to cherish a life to which grief
and despair would otherwise have put an end 

and after all death is no such eligible thing as job in his
calamities makes it and a death desired merely from worldly
disappointments shows not a right mind let me tell this lady whatever
she may think of it you and i jack although not afraid in the height
of passion or resentment to rush into those dangers which might be
followed by a sudden and violent death whenever a point of honour calls
upon us would shudder at his cool and deliberate approach in a lingering
sickness which had debilitated the spirits 


 mr lovelace could not know that the lady was so thoroughly sensible
of the solidity of this doctrine as she really was for in her letter
to mrs norton letter xliv of this volume she says nor let it be
imagined that my present turn of mind proceeds from gloominess or
melancholy for although it was brought on by disappointment the world
showing me early even at my first rushing into it its true and ugly
face yet i hope that it has obtained a better root and will every day
more and more by its fruits demonstrate to me and to all my friends 
that it has 


so we read of a famous french general  i forget as well the reign of the
prince as the name of the man  who having faced with intrepidity the
ghastly varlet on an hundred occasions in the field was the most
dejected of wretches when having forfeited his life for treason he was
led with all the cruel parade of preparation and surrounding guards to
the scaffold 

the poet says well 

 tis not the stoic lesson got by rote 
 the pomp of words and pedant dissertation 
 that can support us in the hour of terror 
 books have taught cowards to talk nobly of it 
 but when the trial comes they start and stand aghast 

very true for then it is the old man in the fable with his bundle of
sticks 

the lady is well read in shakspeare our english pride and glory and
must sometimes reason with herself in his words so greatly expressed 
that the subject affecting as it is cannot produce any thing greater 

 ay but to die and go we know not where 
 to lie in cold obstruction and to rot 
 this sensible warm motion to become
 a kneaded clod and the delighted spirit
 to bathe in fiery floods or to reside
 in thrilling regions of thick-ribbed ice 
 to be imprison'd in the viewless winds 
 or blown with restless violence about
 the pendant worlds or to be worse than worst
 of those that lawless and uncertain thought
 imagines howling tis too horrible 
 the weariest and most loaded worldly life 
 that pain age penury and imprisonment 
 can lay on nature is a paradise
 to what we fear of death 

i find by one of thy three letters that my beloved had some account
from hickman of my interview with miss howe at col ambrose's i had a
very agreeable time of it there although severely rallied by several of
the assembly it concerns me however not a little to find our affair
so generally known among the flippanti of both sexes it is all her own
fault there never surely was such an odd little soul as this not to
keep her own secret when the revealing of it could answer no possible
good end and when she wants not one would think to raise to herself
either pity or friends or to me enemies by the proclamation why 
jack must not all her own sex laugh in their sleeves at her weakness 
what would become of the peace of the world if all women should take it
into their heads to follow her example what a fine time of it would the
heads of families have their wives always filling their ears with their
confessions their daughters with theirs sisters would be every day
setting their brothers about cutting of throats if the brothers had at
heart the honour of their families as it is called and the whole world
would either be a scene of confusion or cuckoldom as much the fashion as
it is in lithuania 


 in lithuania the women are said to have so allowedly their gallants 
called adjutores that the husbands hardly ever enter upon any part of
pleasure without them 


i am glad however that miss howe as much as she hates me kept her
word with my cousins on their visit to her and with me at the colonel's 
to endeavour to persuade her friend to make up all matters by matrimony 
which no doubt is the best nay the only method she can take for her
own honour and that of her family 

i had once thoughts of revenging myself on that vixen and particularly 
as thou mayest remember had planned something to this purpose on the
journey she is going to take which had been talked of some time but i
think let me see yet i think i will let this hickman have her safe
and entire as thou believest the fellow to be a tolerable sort of a
mortal and that i have made the worst of him and i am glad for his own
sake he has not launched out too virulently against me to thee 


 see vol iv letter liv 


but thou seest jack by her refusal of money from him or miss howe 
that the dear extravagant takes a delight in oddnesses choosing to part
with her clothes though for a song dost think she is not a little
touched at times i am afraid she is a little spice of that insanity 
i doubt runs through her that she had in a stronger degree in the
first week of my operations her contempt of life her proclamations 
her refusal of matrimony and now of money from her most intimate
friends are sprinklings of this kind and no other way i think to be
accounted for 


 see letter xlviii of this volume 


her apothecary is a good honest fellow i like him much but the silly
dear's harping so continually upon one string dying dying dying is
what i have no patience with i hope all this melancholy jargon is owing
entirely to the way i would have her to be in and it being as new to
her as the bible beauties to thee no wonder she knows not what to make
of herself and so fancies she is breeding death when the event will
turn out quite the contrary 


 see letter xlvi of this volume 


thou art a sorry fellow in thy remarks on the education and qualification
of smarts and beaux of the rakish order if by thy we's and us's thou
meanest thyself or me for i pretend to say that the picture has no
resemblance of us who have read and conversed as we have done it may
indeed and i believe it does resemble the generality of the fops and
coxcombs about town but that let them look to for if it affects not
me to what purpose thy random shot if indeed thou findest by the new
light darted in upon thee since thou hast had the honour of conversing
with this admirable creature that the cap fits thy own head why then 
according to the qui capit rule e'en take and clap it on and i will
add a string of bells to it to complete thee for the fore-horse of the
idiot team 


 ibid and letter lxviii 


although i just now said a kind thing or two for this fellow hickman yet
i can tell thee i could to use one of my noble peer's humble phrases 
eat him up without a corn of salt when i think of his impudence to
salute my charmer twice at parting and have still less patience with
the lady herself for presuming to offer her cheek or lip  thou sayest not
which  to him and to press his clumsy fist between her charming hands 
an honour worth a king's ransom and what i would give what would i not
give to have and then he in return to press her as thou sayest he
did to his stupid heart at that time no doubt more sensible than
ever it was before 


 see letter xlviii of this volume 


by thy description of their parting i see thou wilt be a delicate fellow
in time my mortification in this lady's displeasure will be thy
exaltation from her conversation i envy thee as well for thy
opportunities as for thy improvements and such an impression has thy
concluding paragraph made upon me that i wish i do not get into a
reformation-humour as well as thou and then what a couple of lamentable
puppies shall we make howling in recitative to each other's discordant
music 


 ibid 


let me improve upon the thought and imagine that turned hermits we
have opened the two old caves at hornsey or dug new ones and in each of
our cells set up a death's head and an hour-glass for objects of
contemplation i have seen such a picture but then jack had not the
old penitent fornicator a suffocating long grey beard what figures
would a couple of brocaded or laced-waistcoated toupets make with their
sour screw'd up half-cock'd faces and more than half shut eyes in a
kneeling attitude recapitulating their respective rogueries this
scheme were we only to make trial of it and return afterwards to our
old ways might serve to better purpose by far than horner's in the
country wife to bring the pretty wenches to us 

let me see the author of hudibras has somewhere a description that would
suit us when met in one of our caves and comparing our dismal notes
together this is it suppose me described 

 he sat upon his rump 
 his head like one in doleful dump 
 betwixt his knees his hands apply'd
 unto his cheeks on either side 
 and by him in another hole 
 sat stupid belford cheek by jowl 

i know thou wilt think me too ludicrous i think myself so it is
truly to be ingenuous a forced put for my passions are so wound up 
that i am obliged either to laugh or cry like honest drunken jack
daventry  poor fellow what an unhappy end was his   thou knowest i
used to observe that whenever he rose from an entertainment which he
never did sober it was his way as soon as he got to the door to look
round him like a carrier pigeon just thrown up in order to spy out his
course and then taking to his heels he would run all the way home 
though it were a mile or two when he could hardly stand and must have
tumbled on his nose if he had attempted to walk moderately this then
must be my excuse in this my unconverted estate for a conclusion so
unworthy of the conclusion to thy third letter 

what a length have i run thou wilt own that if i pay thee not in
quality i do in quantity and yet i leave a multitude of things
unobserved upon indeed i hardly at this present know what to do with
myself but scribble tired with lord m who in his recovery has played
upon me the fable of the nurse the crying child and the wolf tired
with my cousins montague though charming girls were they not so near of
kin tired with mowbray and tourville and their everlasting identity 
tired with the country tired of myself longing for what i have not i
must go to town and there have an interview with the charmer of my soul 
for desperate diseases must have desperate remedies and i only wait to
know my doom from miss howe and then if it be rejection i will try my
fate and receive my sentence at her feet but i will apprize thee of it
beforehand as i told thee that thou mayest keep thy parole with the
lady in the best manner thou canst 



letter liv

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
 in answer to her's of july 27 see letters l li of this volume  
friday night july 28 


i will now my dearest friend write to you all my mind without reserve 
on your resolution not to have this vilest of men you gave me in
your's of sunday the 23d reasons so worthy of the pure mind of my
clarissa in support of this your resolution that nothing but self-love 
lest i should lose my ever-amiable friend could have prevailed upon me
to wish you to alter it 

indeed i thought it was impossible there could be however desirable so
noble an instance given by any of our sex of a passion conquered when
there were so many inducements to give way to it and therefore i was
willing to urge you once more to overcome your just indignation and to
be prevailed upon by the solicitations of his friends before you carried
your resentments to so great a height that it would be more difficult
for you and less to your honour to comply than if you had complied at
first 

but now my dear that i see you fixed in your noble resolution and that
it is impossible for your pure mind to join itself with that of so
perjured a miscreant i congratulate you most heartily upon it and beg
your pardon for but seeming to doubt that theory and practice were not
the same thing with my beloved clarissa 

i have only one thing that saddens my heart on this occasion and that
is the bad state of health mr hickman unwillingly owns you are in 
hitherto you have well observed the doctrine you always laid down to me 
that a cursed person should first seek the world's opinion of her and 
in all cases where the two could not be reconciled have preferred the
first to the last and are of consequence well justified to your own
heart as well as to your anna howe let me therefore beseech you to
endeavour by all possible means to recover your health and spirits 
and this as what if it can be effected will crown the work and show
the world that you were indeed got above the base wretch and though
put out of your course for a little while could resume it again and go
on blessing all within your knowledge as well by your example as by your
precepts 

for heaven's sake then for the world's sake for the honour of our sex 
and for my sake once more i beseech you try to overcome this shock 
and if you can overcome it i shall then be as happy as i wish to be 
for i cannot indeed i cannot think of parting with you for many many
years to come 

the reasons you give for discouraging my wishes to have you near us are
so convincing that i ought at present to acquiesce in them but my
dear when your mind is fully settled as now you are so absolutely
determined in it with regard this wretch i hope it will soon be i
shall expect you with us or near us and then you shall chalk out every
path that i will set my foot in nor will i turn aside either to the
right hand or to the left 

you wish i had not mediated for you to your friends i wish so too 
because my mediation was ineffectual because it may give new ground for
the malice of some of them to work upon and because you are angry with
me for doing so but how as i said in my former could i sit down in
quiet when i knew how uneasy their implacableness made you but i will
tear myself from the subject for i see i shall be warm again and
displease you and there is not one thing in the world that i would do 
however agreeable to myself if i thought it would disoblige you nor any
one that i would omit to do if i knew it would give you pleasure and
indeed my dear half-severe friend i will try if i cannot avoid the
fault as willingly as i would the rebuke 

for this reason i forbear saying any thing on so nice a subject as your
letter to your sister it must be right because you think it so and if
it be taken as it ought that will show you that it is but if it beget
insults and revilings as it is but too likely i find you don't intend
to let me know it 

you were always so ready to accuse yourself for other people's faults 
and to suspect your own conduct rather than the judgment of your
relations that i have often told you i cannot imitate you in this it
is not a necessary point of belief with me that all people in years are
therefore wise or that all young people are therefore rash and
headstrong it may be generally the case as far as i know and possibly
it may be so in the case of my mother and her girl but i will venture
to say that it has not yet appeared to be so between the principals of
harlowe-place and their second daughter 

you are for excusing them beforehand for their expected cruelty as not
knowing what you have suffered nor how ill you are they have heard of
the former and are not sorry for it of the latter they have been told 
and i have most reason to know how they have taken it but i shall be far
from avoiding the fault and as surely shall incur the rebuke if i say
any more upon this subject i will therefore only add at present that
your reasonings in their behalf show you to be all excellence their
returns to you that they are all do my dear let me end with a little
bit of spiteful justice but you won't i know so i have done quite
done however reluctantly yet if you think of the word i would have
said don't doubt the justice of it and fill up the blank with it 

you intimate that were i actually married and mr hickman to desire it 
you would think of obliging me with a visit on the occasion and that 
perhaps when with me it would be difficult for you to remove far from
me 

lord my dear what a stress do you seem to lay upon mr hickman's
desiring it to be sure he does and would of all things desire to have
you near us and with us if we might be so favoured policy as well as
veneration for you would undoubtedly make the man if not a fool desire
this but let me tell you that if mr hickman after marriage should
pretend to dispute with me my friendships as i hope i am not quite a
fool i should let him know how far his own quiet was concerned in such
an impertinence especially if they were such friendships as were
contracted before i knew him 

i know i always differed from you on this subject for you think more
highly of a husband's prerogative than most people do of the royal one 
these notions my dear from a person of your sense and judgment are no
way advantageous to us inasmuch as they justify the assuming sex in
their insolence when hardly one out of ten of them their opportunities
considered deserves any prerogative at all look through all the
families we know and we shall not find one-third of them have half the
sense of their wives and yet these are to be vested with prerogatives 
and a woman of twice their sense has nothing to do but hear tremble and
obey and for conscience-sake too i warrant 

but mr hickman and i may perhaps have a little discourse upon these
sorts of subjects before i suffer him to talk of the day and then i
shall let him know what he has to trust to as he will me if he be a
sincere man what he pretends to expect from me but let me tell you my
dear that it is more in your power than perhaps you think it to
hasten the day so much pressed for by my mother as well as wished for by
you for the very day that you can assure me that you are in a tolerable
state of health and have discharged your doctor and apothecary at their
own motions on that account some day in a month from that desirable
news shall be it so my dear make haste and be well and then this
matter will be brought to effect in a manner more agreeable to your anna
howe than it otherwise ever can 

i sent this day by a particular hand to the misses montague your
letter of just reprobation of the greatest profligate in the kingdom and
hope i shall not have done amiss that i transcribe some of the paragraphs
of your letter of the 23d and send them with it as you at first
intended should be done 

you are it seems and that too much for your health employed in
writing i hope it is in penning down the particulars of your tragical
story and my mother has put me in mind to press you to it with a view
that one day if it might be published under feigned names it would be
as much use as honour to the sex my mother says she cannot help
admiring you for the propriety of your resentment of the wretch and she
would be extremely glad to have her advice of penning your sad story
complied with and then she says your noble conduct throughout your
trials and calamities will afford not only a shining example to your sex 
but at the same time those calamities befalling such a person a
fearful warning to the inconsiderate young creatures of it 

on monday we shall set out on our journey and i hope to be back in a
fortnight and on my return will have one pull more with my mother for a
london journey and if the pretence must be the buying of clothes the
principal motive will be that of seeing once more my dear friend while i
can say i have not finally given consent to the change of a visiter into
a relation and so can call myself my own as well as

your
anna howe 



letter lv

miss howe to the two misses montague
sat july 29 


dear ladies 

i have not bee wanting to use all my interest with my beloved friend to
induce her to forgive and be reconciled to your kinsman though he has
so ill deserved it and have even repeated my earnest advice to her on
this head this repetition and the waiting for her answer having taken
up time have bee the cause that i could not sooner do myself the honour
of writing to you on this subject 

you will see by the enclosed her immovable resolution grounded on
noble and high-souled motives which i cannot but regret and applaud at
the same time applaud for the justice of her determination which will
confirm all your worthy house in the opinion you had conceived of her
unequalled merit and regret because i have but too much reason to
apprehend as well by that as by the report of a gentleman just come
from her that she is in a declining way as to her health that her
thoughts are very differently employed than on a continuance here 

the enclosed letter she thought fit to send to me unsealed that after
i had perused it i might forward it to you and this is the reason it is
superscribed by myself and sealed with my seal it is very full and
peremptory but as she had been pleased in a letter to me dated the 23d
instant as soon as she could hold a pen to give me more ample reasons
why she could not comply with your pressing requests as well as mine i
will transcribe some of the passages in that letter which will give one
of the wickedest men in the world if he sees them reason to think
himself one of the most unhappy in the loss of so incomparable a wife as
he might have gloried in had he not been so superlatively wicked these
are the passages 


 see for these passages miss harlowe's letter no xli of this volume 
 dated july 23 marked with a turned comma thus  

and now ladies you have before you my beloved friend's reasons for her
refusal of a man unworthy of the relation he bears to so many excellent
persons and i will add  for i cannot help it   that the merit and rank
of the person considered and the vile manner of his proceedings there
never was a greater villany committed and since she thinks her first and
only fault cannot be expiated but by death i pray to god daily and will
hourly from the moment i shall hear of that sad catastrophe that he will
be pleased to make him the subject of his vengeance in some such way as
that all who know of his perfidious crime may see the hand of heaven in
the punishment of it 

you will forgive me ladies i love not mine own soul better than i do
miss clarissa harlowe and the distresses she has gone through the
persecution she suffers from all her friends the curse she lies under 
for his sake from her implacable father her reduced health and
circumstances from high health and affluence and that execrable arrest
and confinement which have deepened all her other calamities  and which
must be laid at his door as it was the act of his vile agents that 
whether from his immediate orders or not naturally flowed from his
preceding baseness   the sex dishonoured in the eye of the world in the
person of one of the greatest ornaments of it the unmanly methods 
whatever they were  for i know not all as yet   by which he compassed
her ruin all these considerations join to justify my warmth and my
execrations of a man whom i think excluded by his crimes from the benefit
even of christian forgiveness and were you to see all she writes and to
know the admirable talents she is mistress of you yourselves would join
with me to admire her and execrate him 

believe me to be with a high sense of your merits 

dear ladies 
your most obedient and humble servant 
anna howe 



letter lvi

mrs norton to miss clarissa harlowe
friday july 28 


my dearest young lady 

i have the consolation to tell you that my son is once again in a hopeful
way as to his health he desires his duty to you he is very low and
weak and so am i but this is the first time that i have been able 
for several days past to sit up to write or i would not have been so
long silent 

your letter to your sister is received and answered you have the answer
by this time i suppose i wish it may be to your satisfaction but am
afraid it will not for by betty barnes i find they were in a great
ferment on receiving your's and much divided whether it should be
answered or not they will not yet believe that you are so ill as  to
my infinite concern  i find you are what passed between miss harlowe
and miss howe has been as i feared it would be an aggravation 

i showed betty two or three passages in your letter to me and she seemed
moved and said she would report them favourably and would procure me a
visit from miss harlowe if i would promise to show the same to her but
i have heard no more of that 

methinks i am sorry you refuse the wicked man but doubt not 
nevertheless that your motives for doing so are more commendable than my
wishes that you would not but as you would be resolved as i may say 
on life if you gave way to such a thought and as i have so much
interest in your recovery i cannot forbear showing this regard to
myself and to ask you if you cannot get over your just resentments 
but i dare say no more on this subject 

what a dreadful thing indeed was it for my dearest tender young lady to
be arrested in the streets of london how does my heart go over again
and again for you what your's must have suffered at that time yet
this to such a mind as your's must be light compared to what you had
suffered before 

o my dearest miss clary how shall we know what to pray for when we
pray but that god's will may be done and that we may be resigned to it 
 when at nine years old and afterwards at eleven you had a dangerous
fever how incessantly did we grieve and pray and put up our vows to
the throne of grace for your recovery for all our lives were bound up
in your life yet now my dear as it has proved  especially if we are
soon to lose you   what a much more desirable event both for you and for
us would it have been had we then lost you 

a sad thing to say but as it is in pure love to you that i say it and
in full conviction that we are not always fit to be our own choosers i
hope it may be excusable and the rather as the same reflection will
naturally lead both you and me to acquiesce under the
dispensation since we are assured that nothing happens by chance and
the greatest good may for aught we know be produced from the heaviest
evils 

i am glad you are with such honest people and that you have all your
effects restored how dreadfully have you been used that one should be
glad of such a poor piece of justice as that 

your talent at moving the passions is always hinted at and this betty of
your sister's never comes near me that she is not full of it but as
you say whom has it moved that you wished to move yet were it not
for this unhappy notion i am sure your mother would relent forgive me 
my dear miss clary for i must try one way to be convinced if my opinion
be not just but i will not tell you what that is unless it succeeds 
i will try in pure duty and love to them as to you 

may heaven be your support in all your trials is the constant prayer my
dearest young lady of

your ever affectionate friend and servant 
judith norton 



letter lvii

mrs norton to mrs harlowe
friday july 28 


honoured madam 

being forbid without leave to send you any thing i might happen to
receive from my beloved miss clary and so ill that i cannot attend
you to ask your leave i give you this trouble to let you know that i
have received a letter from her which i think i should hereafter be
held inexcusable as things may happen if i did not desire permission
to communicate to you and that as soon as possible 

applications have been made to the dear young lady from lord m from
the two ladies his sisters and from both his nieces and from the wicked
man himself to forgive and marry him this in noble indignation for
the usage she has received from him she has absolutely refused and
perhaps madam if you and the honoured family should be of opinion that
to comply with their wishes is now the properest measure that can be
taken the circumstances of things may require your authority or advice 
to induce her to change her mind 

i have reason to believe that one motive for her refusal is her full
conviction that she shall not long be a trouble to any body and so she
would not give a husband a right to interfere with her family in
relation to the estate her grandfather devised to her but of this 
however i have not the least intimation from her nor would she i dare
say mention it as a reason having still stronger reasons from his vile
treatment of her to refuse him 

the letter i have received will show how truly penitent the dear creature
is and if i have your permission i will send it sealed up with a copy
of mine to which it is an answer but as i resolve upon this step
without her knowledge  and indeed i do   i will not acquaint her with
it unless it be attended with desirable effects because otherwise 
besides making me incur her displeasure it might quite break her already
half-broken heart i am 

honoured madam 
your dutiful and ever-obliged servant 
judith norton 



letter lviii

mrs harlowe to mrs judith norton
sunday july 30 


we all know your virtuous prudence worthy woman we all do but your
partiality to this your rash favourite is likewise known and we are no
less acquainted with the unhappy body's power of painting her distresses
so as to pierce a stone 

every one is of opinion that the dear naughty creature is working about
to be forgiven and received and for this reason it is that betty has
been forbidden  not by me you may be assured   to mention any more of
her letters for she did speak to my bella of some moving passages you
read to her 

this will convince you that nothing will be heard in her favour to what
purpose then should i mention any thing about her but you may be sure
that i will if i can have but one second however that is not at all
likely until we see what the consequences of her crime will be and who
can tell that she may how can i speak it and my once darling daughter
unmarried she may be with child this would perpetuate her stain her
brother may come to some harm which god forbid one child's ruin i
hope will not be followed by another's murder 

as to her grief and her present misery whatever it be she must bear
with it and it must be short of what i hourly bear for her indeed i am
afraid nothing but her being at the last extremity of all will make her
father and her uncles and her other friends forgive her 

the easy pardon perverse children meet with when they have done the
rashest and most rebellious thing they can do is the reason as is
pleaded to us every day that so may follow their example they depend
upon the indulgent weakness of their parents' tempers and in that
dependence harden their own hearts and a little humiliation when they
have brought themselves into the foretold misery is to be a sufficient
atonement for the greatest perverseness 

but for such a child as this  i mention what others hourly say but what
i must sorrowfully subscribe to  to lay plots and stratagems to deceive
her parents as well as herself and to run away with a libertine can
there be any atonement for her crime and is she not answerable to god 
to us to you and to all the world who knew her for the abuse of such
talents as she has abused 

you say her heart is half-broken is it to be wondered at was not her
sin committed equally against warning and the light of her own knowledge 

that he would now marry her or that she would refuse him if she
believed him in earnest as she has circumstanced herself is not at all
probable and were i inclined to believe it nobody else here would he
values not his relations and would deceive them as soon as any others 
his aversion to marriage he has always openly declared and still
occasionally declares it but if he be now in earnest which every one
who knows him must doubt which do you think hating us too as he
professes to hate and despise us all would be most eligible here to
hear of her death or of her marriage to such a vile man 

to all of us yet i cannot say for o my good mrs norton you know
what a mother's tenderness for the child of her heart would make her
choose notwithstanding all that child's faults rather than lose her
for ever 

but i must sail with the tide my own judgment also joining with the
general resentment or i should make the unhappiness of the more worthy
still greater  my dear mr harlowe's particularly   which is already
more than enough to make them unhappy for the remainder of their days 
this i know if i were to oppose the rest our son would fly out to find
this libertine and who could tell what would be the issue of that with
such a man of violence and blood as that lovelace is known to be 

all i can expect to prevail for her is that in a week or so mr brand
may be sent up to inquire privately about her present state and way of
life and to see she is not altogether destitute for nothing she writes
herself will be regarded 

her father indeed has at her earnest request withdrawn the curse 
which in a passion he laid upon her at her first wicked flight from
us but miss howe  it is a sad thing mrs norton to suffer so many
ways at once   had made matters so difficult by her undue liberties with
us all as well by speech in all companies as by letters written to my
bella that we could hardly prevail upon him to hear her letter read 

these liberties of miss howe with us the general cry against us abroad
wherever we are spoken of and the visible and not seldom audible 
disrespectfulness which high and low treat us with to our faces as we
go to and from church and even at church for no where else have we the
heart to go as if none of us had been regarded but upon her account 
and as if she were innocent we all in fault are constant aggravations 
you must needs think to the whole family 

she has made my lot heavy i am sure that was far from being light
before to tell you truth i am enjoined not to receive any thing of
her's from any hand without leave should i therefore gratify my
yearnings after her so far as to receive privately the letter you
mention what would the case be but to torment myself without being
able to do her good and were it to be known mr harlowe is so
passionate and should it throw his gout into his stomach as her rash
flight did indeed indeed i am very unhappy for o my good woman 
she is my child still but unless it were more in my power yet do i
long to see the letter you say it tells of her present way and
circumstances the poor child who ought to be in possession of
thousands and will for her father will be a faithful steward for
her but it must be in his own way and at his own time 

and is she really ill so very ill but she ought to sorrow she has
given a double measure of it 

but does she really believe she shall not long trouble us but o my
norton she must she will long trouble us for can she think her
death if we should be deprived of her will put an end to our
afflictions can it be thought that the fall of such a child will not
be regretted by us to the last hour of our lives 

but in the letter you have does she without reserve express her
contrition has she in it no reflecting hints does she not aim at
extenuations if i were to see it will it not shock me so much that
my apparent grief may expose me to harshnesses can it be contrived 

but to what purpose don't send it i charge you don't i dare not see
it 

yet 

but alas 

oh forgive the almost distracted mother you can you know how to
allow for all this so i will let it go i will not write over again
this part of my letter 

but i choose not to know more of her than is communicated to us all 
no more than i dare own i have seen and what some of them may rather
communicate to me than receive from me and this for the sake of my
outward quiet although my inward peace suffers more and more by the
compelled reserve 


 


i was forced to break off but i will now try to conclude my long
letter 

i am sorry you are ill but if you were well i could not for your own
sake wish you to go up as betty tells us you long to do if you went 
nothing would be minded that came from you as they already think you
too partial in her favour your going up would confirm it and do
yourself prejudice and her no good and as every body values you here 
i advise you not to interest yourself too warmly in her favour 
especially before my bella's betty till i can let you know a proper
time yet to forbid you to love the dear naughty creature who can o
my norton you must love her and so must i 

i send you five guineas to help you in your present illness and your
son's for it must have lain heavy upon you what a sad sad thing my
dear good woman that all your pains and all my pains for eighteen or
nineteen years together have in so few months been rendered thus
deplorably vain yet i must be always your friend and pity you for the
very reason that i myself deserve every one's pity 

perhaps i may find an opportunity to pay you a visit as in your illness 
and then may weep over the letter you mention with you but for the
future write nothing to me about the poor girl that you think may not be
communicated to us all 

and i charge you as you value my friendship as you wish my peace not
to say any thing of a letter you have from me either to the naughty one 
or to any body else it was with some little relief the occasion given 
to write to you who must in so particular a manner share my
affliction a mother mrs norton cannot forget her child though that
child could abandon her mother and in so doing run away with all her
mother's comforts as i truly say is the case of

your unhappy friend 
charlotte harlowe 



letter lix

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs judith norton
sat july 29 


i congratulate you my dear mrs norton with all my heart on your son's
recovery which i pray to god with all your own health to perfect 

i write in some hurry being apprehensive of the sequence of the hints
you give of some method you propose to try in my favour  with my
relations i presume you mean  but you will not tell me what you say 
if it prove unsuccessful 

now i must beg of you that you will not take any step in my favour with
which you do not first acquaint me 

i have but one request to make to them besides what is contained in my
letter to my sister and i would not methinks for the sake of their own
future peace of mind that they should be teased so by your well-meant
kindness and that of miss howe as to be put upon denying me that and
why should more be asked for me than i can partake of more than is
absolutely necessary for my own peace 

you suppose i should have my sister's answer to my letter by the time
your's reached my hand i have it and a severe one a very severe one 
it is yet considering my fault in their eyes and the provocations i
am to suppose they so newly had from my dear miss howe i am to look upon
it as a favour that it was answered at all i will send you a copy of it
soon as also of mine to which it is an answer 

i have reason to be very thankful that my father has withdrawn that heavy
malediction which affected me so much a parent's curse my dear mrs 
norton what child could die in peace under a parent's curse so
literally fulfilled too as this has been in what relates to this life 

my heart is too full to touch upon the particulars of my sister's letter 
i can make but one atonement for my fault may that be accepted and
may it soon be forgotten by every dear relation that there was such an
unhappy daughter sister or niece as clarissa harlowe 

my cousin morden was one of those who was so earnest in prayer for my
recovery at nine and eleven years of age as you mention my sister
thinks he will be one of those who wish i never had had a being but
pray when he does come let me hear of it with the first 

you think that were it not for that unhappy notion of my moving talent 
my mother would relent what would i give to see her once more and 
although unknown to her to kiss but the hem of her garment 

could i have thought that the last time i saw her would have been the
last with what difficulty should i have been torn from her embraced
feet and when screened behind the yew-hedge on the 5th of april last 
i saw my father and my uncle antony and my brother and sister how
little did i think that that would be the last time i should ever see
them and in so short a space that so many dreadful evils would befal
me 


 see vol ii letter xxxvi 


but i can write nothing but what must give you trouble i will
therefore after repeating my desire that you will not intercede for me
but with my previous consent conclude with the assurance that i am and
ever will be 

your most affectionate and dutiful
clarissa harlowe 



letter lx

miss ar harlowe to miss cl harlowe
 in answer to her's of friday july 21 letter xlv of this volume  
thursday july 27 


o my unhappy lost sister 

what a miserable hand have you made of your romantic and giddy
expedition i pity you at my heart 

you may well grieve and repent lovelace has left you in what way or
circumstances you know best 

i wish your conduct had made your case more pitiable but tis your own
seeking 

god help you for you have not a friend will look upon you poor 
wicked undone creature fallen as you are against warning against
expostulation against duty 

but it signifies nothing to reproach you i weep over you 

my poor mother your rashness and folly have made her more miserable
than you can be yet she has besought my father to grant your request 

my uncles joined with her for they thought there was a little more
modesty in your letter than in the letters of your pert advocate and my
father is pleased to give me leave to write but only these words for
him and no more that he withdraws the curse he laid upon you at the
first hearing of your wicked flight so far as it is in his power to do
it and hopes that your present punishment may be all that you will meet
with for the rest he will never own you nor forgive you and grieves
he has such a daughter in the world 

all this and more you have deserved from him and from all of us but
what have you done to this abandoned libertine to deserve what you have
met with at his hands i fear i fear sister but no more a blessed
four months' work have you made of it 

my brother is now at edinburgh sent thither by my father  though he
knows not this to be the motive   that he may not meet your triumphant
deluder 

we are told he would be glad to marry you but why then did he abandon
you he had kept you till he was tired of you no question and it is
not likely he would wish to have you but upon the terms you have already
without all doubt been his 

you ought to advise your friend miss howe to concern herself less in your
matters than she does except she could do it with more decency she has
written three letters to me very insolent ones your favourer poor
mrs norton thinks you know nothing of the pert creature's writing i
hope you don't but then the more impertinent the writer but 
believing the fond woman i sat down the more readily to answer your
letter and i write with less severity i can tell you than otherwise i
should have done if i had answered it all 

monday last was your birth-day think poor ungrateful wretch as you
are how we all used to keep it and you will not wonder to be told that
we ran away from one another that day but god give you true penitence 
if you have it not already and it will be true if it be equal to the
shame and the sorrow you have given us all 

your afflicted sister 
arabella harlowe 


your cousin morden is every day expected in england he as well as
 others of the family when he comes to hear what a blessed piece of
 work you have made of it will wish you never had had a being 



letter lxi

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
sunday july 30 


you have given me great pleasure my dearest friend by your approbation
of my reasonings and of my resolution founded upon them never to have
mr lovelace this approbation is so right a thing give me leave to
say from the nature of the case and from the strict honour and true
dignity of mind which i always admired in my anna howe that i could
hardly tell to what but to my evil destiny which of late would not let
me please any body to attribute the advice you gave me to the contrary 

but let not the ill state of my health and what that may naturally tend
to sadden you i have told you that i will not run away from life nor
avoid the means that may continue it if god see fit and if he do not 
who shall repine at his will 

if it shall be found that i have not acted unworthy of your love and of
my own character in my greater trials that will be a happiness to both
on reflection 

the shock which you so earnestly advise me to try to get above was a
shock the greatest that i could receive but my dear as it was not
occasioned by my fault i hope i am already got above it i hope i am 

i am more grieved at times however for others than for myself and so
i ought for as to myself i cannot but reflect that i have had an
escape rather than a loss in missing mr lovelace for a husband even
had he not committed the vilest of all outrages 

let any one who knows my story collect his character from his behaviour
to me before that outrage and then judge whether it was in the least
probable that such a man should make me happy but to collect his
character from his principles with regard to the sex in general and from
his enterprizes upon many of them and to consider the cruelty of his
nature and the sportiveness of his invention together with the high
opinion he has of himself it will not be doubted that a wife of his must
have been miserable and more miserable if she loved him than she could
have been were she to be indifferent to him 

a twelvemonth might very probably have put a period to my life situated
as i was with my friends persecuted and harassed as i had been by my
brother and sister and my very heart torn in pieces by the wilful and
 as it is now apparent premeditated suspenses of the man whose
gratitude i wished to engage and whose protection i was the more
entitled to expect as he had robbed me of every other and reduced me to
an absolute dependence upon himself indeed i once thought that it was
all his view to bring me to this as he hated my family and
uncomfortable enough for me if it had been all 

can it be thought my dear that my heart was not more than half broken
 happy as i was before i knew mr lovelace by a grievous change in my
circumstances indeed it was nor perhaps was the wicked violence
wanting to have cut short though possibly not so very short a life that
he has sported with 

had i been his but a month he must have possessed the estate on which my
relations had set their hearts the more to their regret as they hated
him as much as he hated them 

have i not reason these things considered to think myself happier
without mr lovelace than i could have been with him my will too
unviolated and very little nay not any thing as to him to reproach
myself with 

but with my relations it is otherwise they indeed deserve to be pitied 
they are and no doubt will long be unhappy 

to judge of their resentments and of their conduct we must put
ourselves in their situation and while they think me more in fault than
themselves whether my favourers are of their opinion or not and have
a right to judge for themselves they ought to have great allowances made
for them my parents especially they stand at least self-acquitted 
 that i cannot and the rather as they can recollect to their pain 
their past indulgencies to me and their unquestionable love 

your partiality for the friend you so much value will not easily let you
come into this way of thinking but only my dear be pleased to consider
the matter in the following light 

here was my mother one of the most prudent persons of her sex married
into a family not perhaps so happily tempered as herself but every one
of which she had the address for a great while absolutely to govern as
she pleased by her directing wisdom at the same time that they knew not
but her prescriptions were the dictates of their own hearts such a sweet
heart had she of conquering by seeming to yield think my dear what
must be the pride and the pleasure of such a mother that in my brother
she could give a son to the family she distinguished with her love not
unworthy of their wishes a daughter in my sister of whom she had no
reason to be ashamed and in me a second daughter whom every body
complimented such was their partial favour to me as being the still
more immediate likeness of herself how self pleased could she smile
round upon a family she had so blessed what compliments were paid her
upon the example she had given us which was followed with such hopeful
effects with what a noble confidence could she look upon her dear mr 
harlowe as a person made happy by her and be delighted to think that
nothing but purity streamed from a fountain so pure 

now my dear reverse as i daily do this charming prospect see my
dear mother sorrowing in her closet endeavouring to suppress her sorrow
at her table and in those retirements where sorrow was before a
stranger hanging down her pensive head smiles no more beaming over her
benign aspect her virtue made to suffer for faults she could not be
guilty of her patience continually tried because she has more of it
than any other with repetitions of faults she is as much wounded by as
those can be from whom she so often hears of them taking to herself as
the fountain-head a taint which only had infected one of the
under-currents afraid to open her lips were she willing in my favour 
lest it should be thought she has any bias in her own mind to failings
that never could have been suspected in her robbed of that pleasing
merit which the mother of well-nurtured and hopeful children may glory
in every one who visits her or is visited by her by dumb show and
looks that mean more than words can express condoling where they used to
congratulate the affected silence wounding the compassionating look
reminding the half-suppressed sigh in them calling up deeper sighs from
her and their averted eyes while they endeavour to restrain the rising
tear provoking tears from her that will not be restrained 

when i consider these things and added to these the pangs that tear
in pieces the stronger heart of my father because it cannot relieve
itself by those which carry the torturing grief to the eyes of softer
spirits the overboiling tumults of my impatient and uncontroulable
brother piqued to the heart of his honour in the fall of a sister in
whom he once gloried the pride of an elder sister who had given
unwilling way to the honours paid over her head to one born after her 
and lastly the dishonour i have brought upon two uncles who each
contended which should most favour their then happy niece when i say 
i reflect upon my fault in these strong yet just lights what room can
there be to censure any body but my unhappy self and how much reason
have i to say if i justify myself mine own heart shall condemn me if i
say i am perfect it shall also prove me perverse 

here permit me to lay down my pen for a few moments 


 


you are very obliging to me intentionally i know when you tell me it
is in my power to hasten the day of mr hickman's happiness but yet 
give me leave to say that i admire this kind assurance less than any
other paragraph of your letter 

in the first place you know it is not in my power to say when i can
dismiss my physician and you should not put the celebration of a
marriage intended by yourself and so desirable to your mother upon so
precarious an issue nor will i accept of a compliment which must mean
a slight to her 

if any thing could give me a relish for life after what i have suffered 
it would be the hopes of the continuance of the more than sisterly love 
which has for years uninterruptedly bound us together as one mind and
why my dear should you defer giving by a tie still stronger another
friend to one who has so few 

i am glad you have sent my letter to miss montague i hope i shall hear
no more of this unhappy man 

i had begun the particulars of my tragical story but it is so painful a
task and i have so many more important things to do and as i
apprehend so little time to do them in that could i avoid it i would
go no farther in it 

then to this hour i know not by what means several of his machinations
to ruin me were brought about so that some material parts of my sad
story must be defective if i were to sit down to write it but i have
been thinking of a way that will answer the end wished for by your mother
and you full as well perhaps better 

mr lovelace it seems had communicated to his friend mr belford all
that has passed between himself and me as he went on mr belford has
not been able to deny it so that as we may observe by the way a poor
young creature whose indiscretion has given a libertine power over her 
has a reason she little thinks of to regret her folly since these
wretches who have no more honour in one point than in another scruple
not to make her weakness a part of their triumph to their brother
libertines 

i have nothing to apprehend of this sort if i have the justice done me
in his letters which mr belford assures me i have and therefore the
particulars of my story and the base arts of this vile man will i
think be best collected from those very letters of his if mr belford
can be prevailed upon to communicate them to which i dare appeal with
the same truth and fervour as he did who says o that one would hear me 
and that mine adversary had written a book surely i would take it upon
my shoulders and bind it to me as a crown for i covered not my
transgressions as adam by hiding mine iniquity in my bosom 

there is one way which may be fallen upon to induce mr belford to
communicate these letters since he seems to have and declares he always
had a sincere abhorrence of his friend's baseness to me but that 
you'll say when you hear it is a strange one nevertheless i am very
earnest upon it at present 

it is no other than this 

i think to make mr belford the executor of my last will  don't be
surprised   and with this view i permit his visits with the less scruple 
and every time i see him from his concern for me am more and more
inclined to do so if i hold in the same mind and if he accept the
trust and will communicate the materials in his power those joined
with what you can furnish will answer the whole end 

i know you will start at my notion of such an executor but pray my
dear consider in my present circumstances what i can do better as i
am empowered to make a will and have considerable matters in my own
disposal 

your mother i am sure would not consent that you should take this
office upon you it might subject mr hickman to the insults of that
violent man mrs norton cannot for several reasons respecting herself 
my brother looks upon what i ought to have as his right my uncle
harlowe is already one of my trustees as my cousin morden is the other 
for the estate my grandfather left me but you see i could not get from
my own family the few guineas i left behind me at harlowe-place and my
uncle antony once threatened to have my grandfather's will controverted 
my father to be sure my dear i could not expect that my father would
do all i wish should be done and a will to be executed by a father for a
daughter parts of it perhaps absolutely against his own judgment 
carries somewhat daring and prescriptive in the very word 

if indeed my cousin morden were to come in time and would undertake this
trust but even him it might subject to hazards and the more as he is a
man of great spirit and as the other man of as great looks upon me
 unprotected as i have long been as his property 

now mr belford as i have already mentioned knows every thing that has
passed he is a man of spirit and it seems as fearless as the other 
with more humane qualities you don't know my dear what instances of
sincere humanity this mr belford has shown not only on occasion of the
cruel arrest but on several occasions since and mrs lovick has taken
pains to inquire after his general character and hears a very good one
of him his justice and generosity in all his concerns of meum and tuum 
as they are called he has a knowledge of law-matters and has two
executorships upon him at this time in the discharge of which his honour
is unquestioned 

all these reasons have already in a manner determined me to ask this
favour of him although it will have an odd sound with it to make an
intimate friend of mr lovelace my executor 

this is certain my brother will be more acquiescent a great deal in such
a case with the articles of the will as he will see that it will be to
no purpose to controvert some of them which else i dare say he would
controvert or persuade my other friends to do so and who would involve
an executor in a law-suit if they could help it which would be the
case if any body were left whom my brother could hope to awe or
controul since my father has possession of all and is absolutely
governed by him  angry spirits my dear as i have often seen will be
overcome by more angry ones as well as sometimes be disarmed by the
meek   nor would i wish you may believe to have effects torn out of my
father's hands while mr belford who is a man of fortune and a good
economist in his own affairs would have no interest but to do justice 

then he exceedingly presses for some occasion to show his readiness to
serve me and he would be able to manage his violent friend over whom he
has more influence than any other person 

but after all i know not if it were not more eligible by far that my
story and myself too should be forgotten as soon as possible and of
this i shall have the less doubt if the character of my parents  you
will forgive my my dear  cannot be guarded against the unqualified
bitterness which from your affectionate zeal for me has sometimes
mingled with your ink a point that ought and i insist upon it must be
well considered of if any thing be done which your mother and you are
desirous to have done the generality of the world is too apt to oppose
a duty and general duties my dear ought not to be weakened by the
justification of a single person however unhappily circumstanced 

my father has been so good as to take off the heavy malediction he laid
me under i must be now solicitous for a last blessing and that is all
i shall presume to petition for my sister's letter communicating this
grace is a severe one but as she writes to me as from every body how
could i expect it to be otherwise 

if you set out to-morrow this letter cannot reach you till you get to
your aunt harman's i shall therefore direct it thither as mr hickman
instructed me 

i hope you will have met with no inconveniencies in your little journey
and voyage and that you will have found in good health all whom you wish
to see well 

if your relations in the little island join their solicitations with your
mother's commands to have your nuptials celebrated before you leave
them let me beg of you my dear to oblige them how grateful will the
notification that you have done so be to

your ever faithful and affectionate
cl harlowe 



letter lxii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss harlowe
saturday july 29 


i repine not my dear sister at the severity you have been pleased to
express in the letter you favoured me with because that severity was
accompanied with the grace i had petitioned for and because the
reproaches of mine own heart are stronger than any other person's
reproaches can be and yet i am not half so culpable as i am imagined
to be as would be allowed if all the circumstances of my unhappy story
were known and which i shall be ready to communicate to mrs norton if
she be commissioned to inquire into them or to you my sister if you
can have patience to hear them 

i remembered with a bleeding heart what day the 24th of july was i began
with the eve of it and i passed the day itself as it was fit i should
pass it nor have i any comfort to give to my dear and ever-honoured
father and mother and to you my bella but this that as it was the
first unhappy anniversary of my birth in all probability it will be the
last 

believe me my dear sister i say not this merely to move compassion but
from the best grounds and as on that account i think it of the
highest importance to my peace of mind to obtain one farther favour i
would choose to owe to your intercession as my sister the leave i beg 
to address half a dozen lines with the hope of having them answered as i
wish to either or to both my honoured parents to beg their last
blessing 

this blessing is all the favour i have now to ask it is all i dare to
ask yet am i afraid to rush at once though by letter into the presence
of either and if i did not ask it it might seem to be owing to
stubbornness and want of duty when my heart is all humility
penitence only be so good as to embolden me to attempt this task 
write but this one line clary harlowe you are at liberty to write as
you desire  this will be enough and shall to my last hour be
acknowledged as the greatest favour by

your truly penitent sister 
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxiii

mrs norton to miss clarissa harlowe
monday july 31 


my dearest young lady 

i must indeed own that i took the liberty to write to your mother 
offering to enclose to her if she gave me leave your's of the 24th by
which i thought she would see what was the state of your mind what the
nature of your last troubles was from the wicked arrest what the people
are where you lodge what proposals were made you from lord m s family 
also your sincere penitence and how much miss howe's writing to them in
the terms she wrote in disturbed you but as you have taken the matter
into your own hands and forbid me in your last to act in this nice
affair unknown to you i am glad the letter was not required of me and
indeed it may be better that the matter lie wholly between you and them 
since my affection for you is thought to proceed from partiality 

they would choose no doubt that you should owe to themselves and not
to my humble mediation the favour for which you so earnestly sue and of
which i would not have your despair for i will venture to assure you 
that your mother is ready to take the first opportunity to show her
maternal tenderness and this i gather from several hints i am not at
liberty to explain myself upon 

i long to be with you now i am better and now my son is in a fair way
of recovery but is it not hard to have it signified to me that at
present it will not be taken well if i go i suppose while the
reconciliation which i hope will take place is negotiating by means of
the correspondence so newly opened between you and your sister but if
you will have me come i will rely on my good intentions and risque
every one's displeasure 

mr brand has business in town to solicit for a benefice which it is
expected the incumbent will be obliged to quit for a better preferment 
and when there he is to inquire privately after your way of life and
of your health 

he is a very officious young man and but that your uncle harlowe who
has chosen him for this errand regards him as an oracle your mother had
rather any body else had been sent 

he is one of those puzzling over-doing gentlemen who think they see
farther into matters than any body else and are fond of discovered
mysteries where there are none in order to be thought shrewd men 

i can't say i like him either in the pulpit or out of it i who had a
father one of the soundest divines and finest scholars in the kingdom 
who never made an ostentation of what he knew but loved and venerated he
gospel he taught preferring it to all other learning to be obliged to
hear a young man depart from his text as soon as he has named it so
contrary too to the example set him by his learned and worthy
principal when his health permits him to preach and throwing about 
to a christian and country audience scraps of latin and greek from the
pagan classics and not always brought in with great propriety neither 
 if i am to judge by the only way given me to judge of them by the
english he puts them into is an indication of something wrong either
in his head or his heart or both for otherwise his education at the
university must have taught him better you know my dear miss clary 
the honour i have for the cloth it is owing to that that i say what i
do 


 dr lewen 


i know not the day he is to set out and as his inquiries are to be
private be pleased to take no notice of this intelligence i have no
doubt that your life and conversation are such as may defy the scrutinies
of the most officious inquirer 

i am just now told that you have written a second letter to your sister 
but am afraid they will wait for mr brand's report before farther
favour will be obtained from them for they will not yet believe you are
so ill as i fear you are 

but you would soon find that you have an indulgent mother were she at
liberty to act according to her own inclination and this gives me great
hopes that all will end well at last for i verily think you are in the
right way to a reconciliation god give a blessing to it and restore
your health and you to all your friends prays

your ever affectionate 
judith norton 


your mother has privately sent me five guineas she is pleased to say to
 help us in the illness we have been afflicted with but more
 likely that i might send them to you as from myself i hope 
 therefore i may send them up with ten more i have still left 

i will send you word of mr morden's arrival the moment i know it 

if agreeable i should be glad to know all that passes between your
 relations and you 



letter lxiv

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs norton
wednesday aug 2 


you give me my dear mrs norton great pleasure in hearing of your's and
your son's recovery may you continue for many many years a blessing
to each other 

you tell me that you did actually write to my mother offering to enclose
to her mine of the 24th past and you say it was not required of you 
that is to say although you cover it over as gently as you could that
your offer was rejected which makes it evident that no plea could be
made for me yet you bid me hope that the grace i sued for would in
time be granted 

the grace i then sued for was indeed granted but you are afraid you
say that they will wait for mr brand's report before favour will be
obtained in return to the second letter which i wrote to my sister and
you add that i have an indulgent mother were she at liberty to act
according to her own inclination and that all will end well at last 

but what my dear mrs norton what is the grace i sue for in my second
letter it is not that they will receive me into favour if they think
it is they are mistaken i do not i cannot expect that nor as i
have often said should i if they would receive me bear to live in the
eye of those dear friends whom i have so grievously offended tis only 
simply a blessing i ask a blessing to die with not to lie with do
they know that and do they know that their unkindness will perhaps
shorten my date so that their favour if ever they intend to grant it 
may come too late 

once more i desire you not to think of coming to me i have no
uneasiness now but what proceeds from the apprehension of seeing a man i
would not see for the world if i could help it and from the severity of
my nearest and dearest relations a severity entirely their own i doubt 
for you tell me that my brother is at edinburgh you would therefore
heighten their severity and make yourself enemies besides if you were
to come to me don't you see you would 

mr brand may come if he will he is a clergyman and must mean well 
or i must think so let him say of me what he will all my fear is 
that as he knows i am in disgrace with a family whose esteem he is
desirous to cultivate and as he has obligations to my uncle harlowe and
to my father he will be but a languid acquitter not that i am afraid of
what he or any body in the world can hear as to my conduct you may 
my revered and dear friend indeed you may rest satisfied that that is
such as may warrant me to challenge the inquiries of the most officious 

i will send you copies of what passes as you desire when i have an
answer to my second letter i now begin to wish that i had taken the
heart to write to my father himself or to my mother at least instead
of to my sister and yet i doubt my poor mother can do nothing for me of
herself a strong confederacy my dear mrs norton a strong
confederacy indeed against a poor girl their daughter sister niece 
 my brother perhaps got it renewed before he left them he needed
not his work is done and more than done 

don't afflict yourself about money-matters on my account i have no
occasion for money i am glad my mother was so considerate to you i
was in pain for you on the same subject but heaven will not permit so
good a woman to want the humble blessings she was always satisfied with 
i wish every individual of our family were but as rich as you o my
mamma norton you are rich you are rich indeed the true riches are
such content as you are blessed with and i hope in god that i am in the
way to be rich too 

adieu my ever-indulgent friend you say all will be at last happy and
i know it will i confide that it will with as much security as you
may that i will be to my last hour 

your ever grateful and affectionate
cl harlowe 



letter lxv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday aug 1 


i am most confoundedly chagrined and disappointed for here on saturday 
arrived a messenger from miss howe with a letter to my cousins which i
knew nothing of till yesterday when lady sarah and lady betty were
procured to be here to sit in judgment upon it with the old peer and my
two kinswomen and never was bear so miserably baited as thy poor
friend and for what why for the cruelty of miss harlowe for have i
committed any new offence and would i not have re-instated myself in her
favour upon her own terms if i could and is it fair to punish me for
what is my misfortune and not my fault such event-judging fools as i
have for my relations i am ashamed of them all 


 see letter lv of this volume 


in that of miss howe was enclosed one to her from miss harlowe to be
transmitted to my cousins containing a final rejection of me and that
in very vehement and positive terms yet she pretends that in this
rejection she is governed more by principle than passion  d d lie 
as ever was told   and as a proof that she is says that she can
forgive me and does on this one condition that i will never molest her
more the whole letter so written as to make herself more admired me
more detested 


 see letter xli of this volume 


what we have been told of the agitations and workings and sighings and
sobbings of the french prophets among us formerly was nothing at all to
the scene exhibited by these maudlin souls at the reading of these
letters and of some affecting passages extracted from another of my fair
implacable's to miss howe such lamentations for the loss of so charming
a relation such applaudings of her virtue of her exaltedness of soul
and sentiment such menaces of disinherisons i not needing their
reproaches to be stung to the heart with my own reflections and with the
rage of disappointment and as sincerely as any of them admiring her 
what the devil  cried i is all this for is it not enough to be
despised and rejected can i help her implacable spirit would i not
repair the evils i have made her suffer  then was i ready to curse them
all herself and miss howe for company and heartily swore that she
should yet be mine 

i now swear it over again to thee were her death to follow in a week
after the knot is tied by the lord of heaven it shall be tied and she
shall die a lovelace  tell her so if thou wilt but at the same time 
tell her that i have no view to her fortune and that i will solemnly
resign that and all pretensions to it in whose favour she pleases if
she resign life issueless i am not so low-minded a wretch as to be
guilty of any sordid views to her fortune let her judge for herself 
then whether it be not for her honour rather to leave this world a
lovelace than a harlowe 

but do not think i will entirely rest a cause so near my heart upon an
advocate who so much more admires his client's adversary than his client 
i will go to town in a few days in order to throw myself at her feet 
and i will carry with me or have at hand a resolute well-prepared
parson and the ceremony shall be performed let what will be the
consequence 

but if she will permit me to attend her for this purpose at either of the
churches mentioned in the license which she has by her and thank
heaven has not returned me with my letters then will i not disturb
her but meet her at the altar in either church and will engage to bring
my two cousins to attend her and even lady sarah and lady betty and my
lord m in person shall give her to me 

or if it be still more agreeable to her i will undertake that either
lady sarah or lady betty or both shall go to town and attend her down 
and the marriage shall be celebrated in their presence and in that of
lord m either here or elsewhere at her own choice 

do not play me booty belford but sincerely and warmly use all the
eloquence thou art master of to prevail upon her to choose one of these
three methods one of them she must choose by my soul she must 

here is charlotte tapping at my closet-door for admittance what a devil
wants charlotte i will hear no more reproaches come in girl 


 


my cousin charlotte finding me writing on with too much earnestness to
have any regard for politeness to her and guessing at my subject 
besought me to let her see what i had written 

i obliged her and she was so highly pleased on seeing me so much in
earnest that she offered and i accepted her offer to write a letter to
miss harlowe with permission to treat me in it as she thought fit 

i shall enclose a copy of her letter 

when she had written it she brought it to me with apologies for the
freedom taken with me in it but i excused it and she was ready to give
me a kiss for it telling her i had hopes of success from it and that i
thought she had luckily hit it off 

every one approves of it as well as i and is pleased with me for so
patiently submitting to be abused and undertaken for if it do not
succeed all the blame will be thrown upon the dear creature's
perverseness her charitable or forgiving disposition about which she
makes such a parade will be justly questioned and the piety of which
she is now in full possession will be transferred to me 

putting therefore my whole confidence in this letter i postpone all my
other alternatives as also my going to town till my empress send an
answer to my cousin montague 

but if she persist and will not promise to take time to consider of the
matter thou mayest communicate to her what i had written as above 
before my cousin entered and if she be still perverse assure her that
i must and will see her but this with all honour all humility and if
i cannot move her in my favour i will then go abroad and perhaps never
more return to england 

i am sorry thou art at this critical time so busily employed as thou
informest me thou art in thy watford affairs and in preparing to do
belton justice if thou wantest my assistance in the latter command me 
though engrossed by this perverse beauty and plagued as i am i will
obey thy first summons 

i have great dependence upon thy zeal and thy friendship hasten back to
her therefore and resume a task so interesting to me that it is
equally the subject of my dreams as of my waking hours 



letter lxvi

miss montague to miss clarissa harlowe
tuesday aug 1 


dearest madam 

all our family is deeply sensible of the injuries you have received at
the hands of one of it whom you only can render in any manner worthy of
the relation he stands in to us all and if as an act of mercy and
charity the greatest your pious heart can show you will be pleased to
look over his past wickedness and ingratitude and suffer yourself to be
our kinswoman you will make us the happiest family in the world and i
can engage that lord m and lady sarah sadleir and lady betty
lawrance and my sister who are all admirers of your virtues and of
your nobleness of mind will for ever love and reverence you and do
every thing in all their powers to make you amends for what you have
suffered from mr lovelace this madam we should not however dare
to petition for were we not assured that mr lovelace is most sincerely
sorry for his past vileness to you and that he will on his knees beg
your pardon and vow eternal love and honour to you 

wherefore my dearest cousin  how you will charm us all if this
agreeable style may be permitted   for all our sakes for his soul's
sake  you must i am sure be so good a lady as to wish to save a
soul   and allow me to say for your own fame's sake condescend to our
joint request and if by way of encouragement you will but say you will
be glad to see and to be as much known personally as you are by fame 
to charlotte montague i will in two days' time from the receipt of your
permission wait upon you with or without my sister and receive your
farther commands 

let me our dearest cousin  we cannot deny ourselves the pleasure of
calling you so let me  entreat you to give me your permission for my
journey to london and put it in the power of lord m and of the ladies
of the family to make you what reparation they can make you for the
injuries which a person of the greatest merit in the world has received
from one of the most audacious men in it and you will infinitely oblige
us all and particularly her who repeatedly presumes to style herself

your affectionate cousin and obliged servant 
charlotte montague 



letter lxvii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
thursday morning aug 3 six o'clock 


i have been so much employed in my own and belton's affairs that i could
not come to town till last night having contented myself with sending to
mrs lovick to know from time to time the state of the lady's health 
of which i received but very indifferent accounts owing in a great
measure to letters or advices brought her from her implacable family 

i have now completed my own affairs and next week shall go to epsom 
to endeavour to put belton's sister into possession of his own house for
him after which i shall devote myself wholly to your service and to
that of the lady 

i was admitted to her presence last night and found her visibly altered
for the worse when i went home i had your letter of tuesday last put
into my hands let me tell thee lovelace that i insist upon the
performance of thy engagement to me that thou wilt not personally molest
her 


 mr belford dates again on thursday morning ten o'clock and gives an
 account of a conversation which he had just held with the lady upon
 the subject of miss montague's letter to her preceding and upon
 mr lovelace's alternatives as mentioned in letter lxv which mr 
 belford supported with the utmost earnestness but as the result
 of this conversation will be found in the subsequent letters mr 
 belford's pleas and arguments in favour of his friend and the
 lady's answers are omitted  



letter lxviii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss montague
thursday aug 3 


dear madam 

i am infinitely obliged to you for your kind and condescending letter a
letter however which heightens my regrets as it gives me a new
instance of what a happy creature i might have been in an alliance so
much approved of by such worthy ladies and which on their accounts and
on that of lord m would have been so reputable to myself and was once
so desirable 

but indeed indeed madam my heart sincerely repulses the man who 
descended from such a family could be guilty first of such
premeditated violence as he has been guilty of and as he knows farther
intended me on the night previous to the day he set out for berkshire 
and next pretending to spirit could be so mean as to wish to lift into
that family a person he was capable of abasing into a companionship with
the most abandoned of her sex 

allow me then dear madam to declare with favour that i think i never
could be ranked with the ladies of a family so splendid and so noble if 
by vowing love and honour at the altar to such a violator i could
sanctify as i may say his unprecedented and elaborate wickedness 

permit me however to make one request to my good lord m and to lady
betty and lady sarah and to your kind self and your sister it is 
that you will all be pleased to join your authority and interests to
prevail upon mr lovelace not to molest me farther 

be pleased to tell him that if i am designed for life it will be very
cruel in him to attempt to hunt me out of it for i am determined never
to see him more if i can help it the more cruel because he knows that
i have nobody to defend me from him nor do i wish to engage any body to
his hurt or to their own 

if i am on the other hand destined for death it will be no less cruel 
if he will not permit me to die in peace since a peaceable and happy end
i wish him indeed i do 

every worldly good attend you dear madam and every branch of the
honourable family is the wish of one whose misfortune it is that she is
obliged to disclaim any other title than that of 

dear madam 
your and their obliged and faithful servant 
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxix

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
thursday afternoon aug 3 


i am just now agreeably surprised by the following letter delivered into
my hands by a messenger from the lady the letter she mentions as
enclosed i have returned without taking a copy of it the contents of
it will soon be communicated to you i presume by other hands they are
an absolute rejection of thee poor lovelace 


 see miss harlowe's letter no lxviii 


to john belford esq 
aug 3 


sir 

you have frequently offered to oblige me in any thing that shall be
within your power and i have such an opinion of you as to be willing to
hope that at the times you made these offers you meant more than mere
compliment 

i have therefore two requests to make to you the first i will now
mention the other if this shall be complied with otherwise not 

it behoves me to leave behind me such an account as may clear up my
conduct to several of my friends who will not at present concern
themselves about me and miss howe and her mother are very solicitous
that i will do so 

i am apprehensive that i shall not have time to do this and you will not
wonder that i have less and less inclination to set about such a painful
task especially as i find myself unable to look back with patience on
what i have suffered and shall be too much discomposed by the
retrospection were i obliged to make it to proceed with the requisite
temper in a task of still greater importance which i have before me 

it is very evident to me that your wicked friend has given you from time
to time a circumstantial account of all his behaviour to me and devices
against me and you have more than once assured me that he has done my
character all the justice i could wish for both by writing and speech 

now sir if i may have a fair a faithful specimen from his letters or
accounts to you written upon some of the most interesting occasions i
shall be able to judge whether there will or will not be a necessity for
me for my honour's sake to enter upon the solicited task 

you may be assured from my enclosed answer to the letter which miss
montague has honoured me with and which you'll be pleased to return me
as soon as read that it is impossible for me ever to think of your
friend in the way i am importuned to think of him he cannot therefore
receive any detriment from the requested specimen and i give you my
honour that no use shall be made of it to his prejudice in law or
otherwise and that it may not after i am no more i assure you that
it is a main part of my view that the passages you shall oblige me with
shall be always in your own power and not in that of any other person 

if sir you think fit to comply with my request the passages i would
wish to be transcribed making neither better nor worse of the matter 
are those which he has written to you on or about the 7th and 8th of
june when i was alarmed by the wicked pretence of a fire and what he
has written from sunday june 11 to the 19th and in doing this you
will much oblige

your humble servant 
clarissa harlowe 


 


now lovelace since there are no hopes for thee of her returning
favour since some praise may lie for thy ingenuousness having neither
offered  as more diminutive-minded libertines would have done  to
palliate thy crimes by aspersing the lady or her sex since she may be
made easier by it since thou must fare better from thine own pen than
from her's and finally since thy actions have manifested that thy
letters are not the most guilty part of what she knows of thee i see not
why i may not oblige her upon her honour and under the restrictions 
and for the reasons she has given and this without breach of the
confidence due to friendly communication especially as i might have
added since thou gloriest in thy pen and in thy wickedness and canst
not be ashamed 

but be this as it may she will be obliged before thy remonstrances or
clamours against it can come so pr'ythee now make the best of it and
rave not except for the sake of a pretence against me and to exercise
thy talent of execration and if thou likest to do so for these
reasons rave and welcome 

i long to know what the second request is but this i know that if it be
any thing less than cutting thy throat or endangering my own neck i
will certainly comply and be proud of having it in my power to oblige
her 

and now i am actually going to be busy in the extracts 



letter lxx

mr belford to miss clarissa harlowe
aug 3 4 


madam 

you have engaged me to communicate to you upon my honour making
neither better nor worse of the matter what mr lovelace has written to
me in relation to yourself in the period preceding your going to
hampstead and in that between the 11th and 19th of june and you assure
me you have no view in this request but to see if it be necessary for
you from the account he gives to touch upon the painful subjects
yourself for the sake of your own character 

your commands madam are of a very delicate nature as they may seem to
affect the secrets of private friendship but as i know you are not
capable of a view the motives to which you will not own and as i think
the communication may do some credit to my unhappy friend's character as
an ingenuous man though his actions by the most excellent woman in the
world have lost him all title to that of an honourable one i obey you
with the greater cheerfulness 


 he then proceeds with his extracts and concludes them with an address
 to her in his friend's behalf in the following words  

and now madam i have fulfilled your commands and i hope have not
dis-served my friend with you since you will hereby see the justice he
does to your virtue in every line he writes he does the same in all his
letters though to his own condemnation and give me leave to add that
if this ever-amiable sufferer can think it in any manner consistent with
her honour to receive his vows on the altar on his truly penitent turn
of mind i have not the least doubt but that he will make her the best
and tenderest of husbands what obligation will not the admirable lady
hereby lay upon all his noble family who so greatly admire her and i
will presume to say upon her own when the unhappy family aversion
 which certainly has been carried to an unreasonable height against him 
shall be got over and a general reconciliation takes place for who is
it that would not give these two admirable persons to each other were
not his morals an objection 

however this be i would humbly refer to you madam whether as you will
be mistress of very delicate particulars from me his friend you should
not in honour think yourself concerned to pass them by as if you had
never seen them and not to take advantage of the communication not even
in an argument as some perhaps might lie with respect to the
premeditated design he seems to have had not against you as you but as
against the sex over whom i am sorry i can bear witness myself it is
the villanous aim of all libertines to triumph and i would not if any
misunderstanding should arise between him and me give him room to
reproach me that his losing of you and through his usage of you of his
own friends were owing to what perhaps he would call breach of trust 
were he to judge rather by the event than by my intention 

i am madam with the most profound veneration 

your most faithful humble servant 
j belford 



letter lxxi

miss clarissa harlowe to john belford esq 
friday aug 4 


sir 

i hold myself extremely obliged to you for your communications i will
make no use of them that you shall have reason to reproach either
yourself or me with i wanted no new lights to make the unhappy man's
premeditated baseness to me unquestionable as my answer to miss
montague's letter might convince you 


 see letter lxviii of this volume 


i must own in his favour that he has observed some decency in his
accounts to you of the most indecent and shocking actions and if all
his strangely-communicative narrations are equally decent nothing will
be rendered criminally odious by them but the vile heart that could
meditate such contrivances as were much stronger evidences of his
inhumanity than of his wit since men of very contemptible parts and
understanding may succeed in the vilest attempts if they can once bring
themselves to trample on the sanctions which bind man to man and sooner
upon an innocent person than upon any other because such a one is apt to
judge of the integrity of others' hearts by its own 

i find i have had great reason to think myself obliged to your intention
in the whole progress of my sufferings it is however impossible sir 
to miss the natural inference on this occasion that lies against his
predetermined baseness but i say the less because you shall not think
i borrow from what you have communicated aggravations that are not
needed 

and now sir that i may spare you the trouble of offering any future
arguments in his favour let me tell you that i have weighed every thing
thoroughly all that human vanity could suggest all that a desirable
reconciliation with my friends and the kind respects of his own could
bid me hope for the enjoyment of miss howe's friendship the dearest
consideration to me now of all the worldly ones all these i have
weighed and the result is and was before you favoured me with these
communications that i have more satisfaction in the hope that in one
month there will be an end of all with me than in the most agreeable
things that could happen from an alliance with mr lovelace although i
were to be assured he would make the best and tenderest of husbands but
as to the rest if satisfied with the evils he has brought upon me he
will forbear all further persecutions of me i will to my last hour 
wish him good although he hath overwhelmed the fatherless and digged a
pit for his friend fatherless may she well be called and motherless
too who has been denied all paternal protection and motherly
forgiveness 


 


and now sir acknowledging gratefully your favour in the extracts i
come to the second request i had to make you which requires a great deal
of courage to mention and which courage nothing but a great deal of
distress and a very destitute condition can give but if improper i
can but be denied and dare to say i shall be at least excused thus 
then i preface it 

you see sir that i am thrown absolutely into the hands of strangers 
who although as kind and compassionate as strangers can be wished to be 
are nevertheless persons from whom i cannot expect any thing more than
pity and good wishes nor can my memory receive from them any more
protection than my person if either should need it 

if then i request it of the only person possessed of materials that
will enable him to do my character justice 

and who has courage independence and ability to oblige me 

to be the protector or my memory as i may say 

and to be my executor and to see some of my dying requests performed 

and if i leave it to him to do the whole in his own way manner and
time consulting however in requisite cases my dear miss howe 

i presume to hope that this my second request may be granted 

and if it may these satisfactions will accrue to me from the favour done
me and the office undertaken 

it will be an honour to my memory with all those who shall know that i
was so well satisfied of my innocence that having not time to write my
own story i could intrust it to the relation which the destroyer of my
fame and fortunes has given of it 

i shall not be apprehensive of involving any one in my troubles or
hazards by this task either with my own relations or with your friend 
having dispositions to make which perhaps my own friends will not be so
well pleased with as it were to be wished they would be  as i intend not
unreasonable ones but you know sir where self is judge matters even
with good people will not always be rightly judged of 

i shall also be freed from the pain of recollecting things that my soul
is vexed at and this at a time when its tumults should be allayed in
order to make way for the most important preparation 

and who knows but that mr belford who already from a principle of
humanity is touched at my misfortunes when he comes to revolve the
whole story placed before him in one strong light and when he shall
have the catastrophe likewise before him and shall become in a manner
interested in it who knows but that from a still higher principle he
may so regulate his future actions as to find his own reward in the
everlasting welfare which is wished him by his

obliged servant 
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxxii

mr belford to miss clarissa harlowe
friday aug 4 


madam 

i am so sensible of the honour done me in your's of this day that i
would not delay for one moment the answering of it i hope you will live
to see many happy years and to be your own executrix in those points
which your heart is most set upon but in the case of survivorship i
most cheerfully accept of the sacred office you are pleased to offer me 
and you may absolutely rely upon my fidelity and if possible upon the
literal performance of every article you shall enjoin me 

the effect of the kind wish you conclude with had been my concern ever
since i have been admitted to the honour of your conversation it shall
be my whole endeavour that it be not vain the happiness of approaching
you which this trust as i presume will give me frequent opportunities
of doing must necessarily promote the desired end since it will be
impossible to be a witness of your piety equanimity and other virtues 
and not aspire to emulate you all i beg is that you will not suffer
any future candidate or event to displace me unless some new instances
of unworthiness appear either in the morals or behaviour of 

madam 
your most obliged and faithful servant 
j belford 



letter lxxiii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
friday night aug 4 


i have actually delivered to the lady the extracts she requested me to
give her from your letters i do assure you that i have made the very
best of the matter for you not that conscience but that friendship 
could oblige me to make i have changed or omitted some free words the
warm description of her person in the fire-scene as i may call it i
have omitted i have told her that i have done justice to you in the
justice you have done to her by her unexampled virtue but take the very
words which i wrote to her immediately following the extracts 


and now madam  see the paragraph marked with an inverted comma
 thus   letter lxx of this volume 


the lady is extremely uneasy at the thoughts of your attempting to visit
her for heaven's sake your word being given and for pity's sake 
 for she is really in a very weak and languishing way let me beg of you
not to think of it 

yesterday afternoon she received a cruel letter as mrs lovick supposes
it to be by the effect it had upon her from her sister in answer to
one written last saturday entreating a blessing and forgiveness from her
parents 

she acknowledges that if the same decency and justice are observed in
all of your letters as in the extracts i have obliged her with as i
have assured her they are she shall think herself freed from the
necessity of writing her own story and this is an advantage to thee
which thou oughtest to thank me for 

but what thinkest thou is the second request she had to make to me no
other than that i would be her executor her motives will appear before
thee in proper time and then i dare to answer will be satisfactory 

you cannot imagine how proud i am of this trust i am afraid i shall too
soon come into the execution of it as she is always writing what a
melancholy pleasure will be the perusal and disposition of her papers
afford me such a sweetness of temper so much patience and resignation 
as she seems to be mistress of yet writing of and in the midst of
present distresses how much more lively and affecting for that reason 
must her style be her mind tortured by the pangs of uncertainty the
events then hidden in the womb of fate than the dry narrative 
unanimated style of persons relating difficulties and dangers
surmounted the relater perfectly at ease and if himself unmoved by his
own story not likely greatly to affect the reader 


 


saturday morning aug 5 

i am just returned from visiting the lady and thanking her in person for
the honour she has done me and assuring her if called to the sacred
trust of the utmost fidelity and exactness 

i found her very ill i took notice of it she said she had received a
second hard-hearted letter from her sister and she had been writing a
letter and that on her knees directly to her mother which before she
had not had the courage to do it was for a last blessing and
forgiveness no wonder she said that i saw her affected now that i
had accepted of the last charitable office for her for which as well
as for complying with her other request she thanked me i should one
day have all these letters before me and could she have a kind one in
return to that she had been now writing to counterbalance the unkind one
she had from her sister she might be induced to show me both together 
otherwise for her sister's sake it were no matter how few saw the poor
bella's letter 

i knew she would be displeased if i had censured the cruelty of her
relations i therefore only said that surely she must have enemies who
hoped to find their account in keeping up the resentments of her friends
against her 

it may be so mr belford said she the unhappy never want enemies one
fault wilfully committed authorizes the imputation of many more where
the ear is opened to accusations accusers will not be wanting and every
one will officiously come with stories against a disgraced child where
nothing dare be said in her favour i should have been wise in time and
not have needed to be convinced by my own misfortunes of the truth of
what common experience daily demonstrates mr lovelace's baseness my
father's inflexibility my sister's reproaches are the natural
consequences of my own rashness so i must make the best of my hard lot 
only as these consequences follow one another so closely while they are
new how can i help being anew affected 

i asked if a letter written by myself by her doctor or apothecary to
any of her friends representing her low state of health and great
humility would be acceptable or if a journey to any of them would be of
service i would gladly undertake it in person and strictly conform to
her orders to whomsoever she should direct me to apply 

she earnestly desired that nothing of this sort might be attempted 
especially without her knowledge and consent miss howe she said had
done harm by her kindly-intended zeal and if there were room to expect
favour by mediation she had ready at hand a kind friend mrs norton 
who for piety and prudence had few equals and who would let slip no
opportunity to endeavour to do her service 

i let her know that i was going out of town till monday she wished me
pleasure and said she should be glad to see me on my return 

adieu 



letter lxxiv

miss ar harlowe to miss cl harlowe
 in answer to her's of july 29 see letter lxii of this volume  
thursday morn aug 3 


sister clary 

i wish you would not trouble me with any more of your letters you had
always a knack at writing and depended upon making every one do what you
would when you wrote but your wit and folly have undone you and now 
as all naughty creatures do when they can't help themselves you come
begging and praying and make others as uneasy as yourself 

when i wrote last to you i expected that i should not be at rest 

and so you'd creep on by little and little till you'll want to be
received again 

but you only hope for forgiveness and a blessing you say a blessing
for what sister clary think for what however i read your letter to
my father and mother 

i won't tell you what my father said one who has the true sense you
boast to have of your misdeeds may guess without my telling you what a
justly-incensed father would say on such an occasion 

my poor mother o wretch what has not your ungrateful folly cost my poor
mother had you been less a darling you would not perhaps have been
so graceless but i never in my life saw a cockered favourite come to
good 

my heart is full and i can't help writing my mind for your crimes have
disgraced us all and i am afraid and ashamed to go to any public or
private assembly or diversion and why i need not say why when your
actions are the subjects either of the open talk or of the affronting
whispers of both sexes at all such places 

upon the whole i am sorry i have no more comfort to send you but i find
nobody willing to forgive you 

i don't know what time may do for you and when it is seen that your
penitence is not owing more to disappointment than to true conviction 
for it is too probable miss clary that had not your feather-headed
villain abandoned you we should have heard nothing of these moving
supplications nor of any thing but defiances from him and a guilt
gloried in from you and this is every one's opinion as well as that of

your afflicted sister 
arabella harlowe 


i send this by a particular hand who undertakes to give it you or leave
 it for you by to-morrow night 



letter lxxv

miss clarissa harlowe to her mother
saturday aug 5


honoured madam 

no self-convicted criminal ever approached her angry and just judge with
greater awe nor with a truer contrition than i do you by these lines 

indeed i must say that if the latter of my humble prayer had not
respected my future welfare i had not dared to take this liberty but
my heart is set upon it as upon a thing next to god almighty's
forgiveness necessary for me 

had my happy sister known my distresses she would not have wrung my
heart as she has done by a severity which i must needs think unkind
and unsisterly 

but complaint of any unkindness from her belongs not to me yet as she
is pleased to write that it must be seen that my penitence is less owing
to disappointment than to true conviction permit me madam to insist
upon it that if such a plea can be allowed me i an actually entitled
to the blessing i sue for since my humble prayer is founded upon a true
and unfeigned repentance and this you will the readier believe if the
creature who never to the best of her remembrance told her mamma a
wilful falsehood may be credited when she declares as she does in the
most solemn manner that she met the seducer with a determination not to
go off with him that the rash step was owing more to compulsion than to
infatuation and that her heart was so little in it that she repented
and grieved from the moment she found herself in his power and for every
moment after for several weeks before she had any cause from him to
apprehend the usage she met with 

wherefore on my knees my ever-honoured mamma for on my knees i write
this letter i do most humbly beg your blessing say but in so many
words i ask you not madam to call me your daughter lost unhappy
wretch i forgive you and may god bless you this is all let me on
a blessed scrap of paper but see one sentence to this effect under your
dear hand that i may hold it to my heart in my most trying struggles 
and i shall think it a passport to heaven and if i do not too much
presume and it were we instead of i and both your honoured names
subjoined to it i should then have nothing more to wish then would i
say great and merciful god thou seest here in this paper thy poor
unworthy creature absolved by her justly-offended parents oh join for
my redeemer's sake thy all-gracious fiat and receive a repentant sinner
to the arms of thy mercy 

i can conjure you madam by no subject of motherly tenderness that will
not in the opinion of my severe censurers before whom this humble
address must appear add to reproach let me therefore for god's sake 
prevail upon you to pronounce me blest and forgiven since you will
thereby sprinkle comfort through the last hours of

your
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxxvi

miss montague to miss clarissa harlowe
 in answer to her's of aug 3 see letter lxviii of this volume  
monday aug 7 


dear madam 

we were all of opinion before your letter came that mr lovelace was
utterly unworthy of you and deserved condign punishment rather than to
be blessed with such a wife and hoped far more from your kind
consideration for us than any we supposed you could have for so base an
injurer for we were all determined to love you and admire you let his
behaviour to you be what it would 

but after your letter what can be said 

i am however commanded to write in all the subscribing names to let
you know how greatly your sufferings have affected us to tell you that
my lord m has forbid him ever more to enter the doors of the apartments
where he shall be and as you labour under the unhappy effects of your
friends' displeasure which may subject you to inconveniencies his
lordship and lady sarah and lady betty beg of you to accept for your
life or at least till you are admitted to enjoy your own estate of
one hundred guineas per quarter which will be regularly brought you by
an especial hand and of the enclosed bank-bill for a beginning and do
not dearest madam we all beseech you do not think you are beholden
 for this token of lord m s and lady sarah's and lady betty's love to
you to the friends of this vile man for he has not one friend left
among us 

we each of us desire to be favoured with a place in your esteem and to
be considered upon the same foot of relationship as if what once was so
much our pleasure to hope would be had been and it shall be our united
prayer that you may recover health and spirits and live to see many
happy years and since this wretch can no more be pleaded for that 
when he is gone abroad as he now is preparing to do we may be permitted
the honour of a personal acquaintance with a lady who has no equal 
these are the earnest requests dearest young lady of

your affectionate friends 
and most faithful servants 
m 
sarah sadleir 
eliz lawrance 
charl montague 
marth montague 


you will break the hearts of the three first-named more particularly if
 you refuse them your acceptance dearest young lady punish not
 them for his crimes we send by a particular hand which will
 bring us we hope your accepting favour 

mr lovelace writes by the same hand but he knows nothing of our letter 
 nor we of his for we shun each other and one part of the house
 holds us another him the remotest from each other 



letter lxxvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sat aug 23 


i am so disturbed at the contents of miss harlowe's answer to my cousin
charlotte's letter of tuesday last which was given her by the same
fellow that gave me your's that i have hardly patience or consideration
enough to weigh what you write 

she had need indeed to cry out for mercy for herself from her friends 
who knows not how to show any she is a true daughter of the harlowes 
by my soul jack she is a true daughter of the harlowes yet has she so
many excellencies that i must love her and fool that i am love her
the more for despising me 

thou runnest on with thy cursed nonsensical reformado rote of dying 
dying dying and having once got the word by the end canst not help
foisting it in at every period the devil take me if i don't think thou
wouldst rather give her poison with thy own hands rather than she should
recover and rob thee of the merit of being a conjurer 

but no more of thy cursed knell thy changes upon death's candlestick
turned bottom-upwards she'll live to bury me i see that for by my
soul i can neither eat drink nor sleep nor what is still worse love
any woman in the world but her nor care i to look upon a woman now on
the contrary i turn my head from every one i meet except by chance an
eye an air a feature strikes me resembling her's in some glancing-by
face and then i cannot forbear looking again though the second look
recovers me for there can be nobody like her 

but surely belford the devil's in this woman the more i think of her
nonsense and obstinacy the less patience i have with her is it
possible she can do herself her family her friends so much justice any
other way as by marrying me were she sure she should live but a day 
she ought to die a wife if her christian revenge will not let her wish
to do so for her own sake ought she not for the sake of her family and
of her sex which she pretends sometimes to have so much concern for 
and if no sake is dear enough to move her harlowe-spirit in my favour 
has she any title to the pity thou so pitifully art always bespeaking for
her 

as to the difference which her letter has made between me and the stupid
family here  and i must tell thee we are all broke in pieces   i value
not that of a button they are fools to anathematize and curse me who
can give them ten curses for one were they to hold it for a day
together 

i have one half of the house to myself and that the best for the great
enjoy that least which costs them most grandeur and use are two things 
the common part is their's the state part is mine and here i lord it 
and will lord it as long as i please while the two pursy sisters the
old gouty brother and the two musty nieces are stived up in the other
half and dare not stir for fear of meeting me whom that's the jest
of it they have forbidden coming into their apartments as i have them
into mine and so i have them all prisoners while i range about as i
please pretty dogs and doggesses to quarrel and bark at me and yet 
whenever i appear afraid to pop out of their kennels or if out before
they see me at the sight of me run growling in again with their flapt
ears their sweeping dewlaps and their quivering tails curling inwards 

and here while i am thus worthily waging war with beetles drones 
wasps and hornets and am all on fire with the rage of slighted love 
thou art regaling thyself with phlegm and rock-water and art going on
with thy reformation-scheme and thy exultations in my misfortunes 

the devil take thee for an insensible dough-baked varlet i have no more
patience with thee than with the lady for thou knowest nothing either of
love or friendship but art as unworthy of the one as incapable of the
other else wouldst thou not rejoice as thou dost under the grimace of
pity in my disappointments 

and thou art a pretty fellow art thou not to engage to transcribe for
her some parts of my letters written to thee in confidence letters that
thou shouldest sooner have parted with thy cursed tongue than have owned
that thou ever hadst received such yet these are now to be communicated
to her but i charge thee and woe be to thee if it be too late that
thou do not oblige her with a line of mine 

if thou hast done it the least vengeance i will take is to break through
my honour given to thee not to visit her as thou wilt have broken
through thine to me in communicating letters written under the seal of
friendship 

i am now convinced too sadly for my hopes by her letter to my cousin
charlotte that she is determined never to have me 

unprecedented wickedness she calls mine to her but how does she know
what love in its flaming ardour will stimulate men to do how does she
know the requisite distinctions of the words she uses in this case to
think the worst and to be able to make comparisons in these very
delicate situations must she not be less delicate than i had imagined
her to be but she has head that the devil is black and having a mind
to make one of me brays together in the mortar of her wild fancy 
twenty chimney-sweepers in order to make one sootier than ordinary rise
out of the dirty mass 

but what a whirlwind does she raise in my soul by her proud contempts of
me never never was mortal man's pride so mortified how does she
sink me even in my own eyes her heart sincerely repulses me she
says for my meanness  yet she intends to reap the benefit of what she
calls so curse upon her haughtiness and her meanness at the same
time her haughtiness to me and her meanness to her own relations more
unworthy of kindred with her than i can be or i am mean indeed 

yet who but must admire who but must adore her oh that cursed cursed
house but for the women of that then their d d potions but for
those had her unimpaired intellects and the majesty of her virtue 
saved her as once it did by her humble eloquence another time by her
terrifying menaces against her own life 


 in the fire-scene vol v letter xvi 
 vol vi letter xxxvi in the pen-knife-scene 


yet in both these to find her power over me and my love for her and to
hate to despise and to refuse me she might have done this with some
show of justice had the last-intended violation been perpetrated but
to go away conqueress and triumphant in every light well may she
despise me for suffering her to do so 

she left me low and mean indeed and the impression holds with her i
could tear my flesh that i gave her not cause that i humbled her not
indeed or that i staid not in town to attend her motions instead of
lord m s till i could have exalted myself by giving to myself a wife
superior to all trial to all temptation 

i will venture one more letter to her however and if that don't do or
procure me an answer then will i endeavour to see her let what will be
the consequence if she get out of my way i will do some noble mischief
to the vixen girl whom she most loves and then quit the kingdom for
ever 

and now jack since thy hand is in at communicating the contents of
private letters tell her this if thou wilt and add to it that if she
abandon me god will and what then will be the fate of

her
lovelace 



letter lxxviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
 in answer to letter lxv of this volume  
monday aug 7 


and so you have actually delivered to the fair implacable extracts of
letters written in the confidence of friendship take care take care 
belford i do indeed love you better than i love any man in the world 
but this is a very delicate point the matter is grown very serious to
me my heart is bent upon having her and have her i will though i
marry her in the agonies of death 

she is very earnest you say that i will not offer to molest her that 
let me tell her will absolutely depend upon herself and the answer she
returns whether by pen and ink or the contemptuous one of silence 
which she bestowed upon my last four to her and i will write it in such
humble and in such reasonable terms that if she be not a true harlowe 
she shall forgive me but as to the executorship which she is for
conferring upon thee thou shalt not be her executor let me perish if
thou shalt nor shall she die nobody shall be any thing nobody shall
dare to be any thing to her but i thy happiness is already too great 
to be admitted daily to her presence to look upon her to talk to her 
to hear her talk while i am forbid to come within view of her window 
what a reprobation is this of the man who was once more dear to her than
all the men in the world and now to be able to look down upon me while
her exalted head is hid from me among the stars sometimes with scorn at
other times with pity i cannot bear it 

this i tell thee that if i have not success in my effort by letter i
will overcome the creeping folly that has found its way to my heart or i
will tear it out in her presence and throw it at her's that she may see
how much more tender than her own that organ is which she and you and
every one else have taken the liberty to call callous 

give notice of the people who live back and edge and on either hand of
the cursed mother to remove their best effects if i am rejected for
the first vengeance i shall take will be to set fire to that den of
serpents nor will there be any fear of taking them when they are in any
act that has the relish of salvation in it as shakspeare says so that
my revenge if they perish in the flames i shall light up will be
complete as to them 



letter lxxix

mr lovelace to miss clarissa harlowe
monday aug 7 


little as i have reason to expect either your patient ear or forgiving
heart yet cannot i forbear to write to you once more as a more
pardonable intrusion perhaps than a visit would be to beg of you to
put it in my power to atone as far as it is possible to atone for the
injuries i have done you 

your angelic purity and my awakened conscience are standing records of
your exalted merit and of my detestable baseness but your forgiveness
will lay me under an eternal obligation to you forgive me then my
dearest life my earthly good the visible anchor of my future hope as
you who believe you have something to be forgiven for hope for pardon
yourself forgive me and consent to meet me upon your own conditions 
and in whose company you please at the holy altar and to give yourself
a title to the most repentant and affectionate heart that ever beat in a
human bosom 

but perhaps a time of probation may be required it may be impossible
for you as well from indisposition as doubt so soon to receive me to
absolute favour as my heart wishes to be received in this case i will
submit to your pleasure and there shall be no penance which you can
impose that i will not cheerfully undergo if you will be pleased to give
me hope that after an expiation suppose of months wherein the
regularity of my future life and actions shall convince you of my
reformation you will at last be mine 

let me beg then the favour of a few lines encouraging me in this
conditional hope if it must not be a still nearer hope and a more
generous encouragement 

if you refuse me this you will make me desperate but even then i must 
at all events throw myself at your feet that i may not charge myself
with the omission of any earnest any humble effort to move you in my
favour for in you madam in your forgiveness are centred my hopes as
to both worlds since to be reprobated finally by you will leave me
without expectation of mercy from above for i am now awakened enough to
think that to be forgiven by injured innocents is necessary to the divine
pardon the almighty putting into the power of such as is reasonable to
believe the wretch who causelessly and capitally offends them and who
can be entitled to this power if you are not 

your cause madam in a word i look upon to be the cause of virtue and 
as such the cause of god and may i not expect that he will assert it
in the perdition of a man who has acted by a person of the most spotless
purity as i have done if you by rejecting me show that i have offended
beyond the possibility of forgiveness 

i do most solemnly assure you that no temporal or worldly views induce me
to this earnest address i deserve not forgiveness from you nor do my
lord m and his sisters from me i despise them from my heart for
presuming to imagine that i will be controuled by the prospect of any
benefits in their power to confer there is not a person breathing but
yourself who shall prescribe to me your whole conduct madam has been
so nobly principled and your resentments are so admirably just that you
appear to me even in a divine light and in an infinitely more amiable
one at the same time than you could have appeared in had you not
suffered the barbarous wrongs that now fill my mind with anguish and
horror at my own recollected villany to the most excellent of women 

i repeat that all i beg for the present is a few lines to guide my
doubtful steps and if possible for you so far to condescend to
encourage me to hope that if i can justify my present vows by my future
conduct i may be permitted the honour to style myself 

eternally your's 
r lovelace 



letter lxxx

miss clarissa harlowe to lord m and to the ladies of his house
 in reply to miss montague's of aug 7 see letter lxxvi of this volume  
tuesday aug 8 


excuse me my good lord and my ever-honoured ladies from accepting of
your noble quarterly bounty and allow me to return with all grateful
acknowledgement and true humility the enclosed earnest of your goodness
to me indeed i have no need of the one and cannot possibly want the
other but nevertheless have such a sense of your generous favour that 
to my last hour i shall have pleasure in contemplating upon it and be
proud of the place i hold in the esteem of such venerable persons to
whom i once had the ambition to hope to be related 

but give me leave to express my concern that you have banished your
kinsman from your presence and favour since now perhaps he will be
under less restraint than ever and since i in particular who had hoped
by your influence to remain unmolested for the remainder of my days may
again be subjected to his persecutions 

he has not my good lord and my dear ladies offended against you as he
has against me yet you could all very generously intercede for him with
me and shall i be very improper if i desire for my own peace-sake for
the sake of other poor creatures who may still be injured by him if he
be made quite desperate and for the sake of all your worthy family that
you will extend to him that forgiveness which you hope for from me and
this the rather as i presume to think that his daring and impetuous
spirit will not be subdued by violent methods since i have no doubt that
the gratifying of a present passion will be always more prevalent with
him than any future prospects however unwarrantable the one or
beneficial the other 

your resentments on my account are extremely generous as your goodness
to me is truly noble but i am not without hope that he will be properly
affected by the evils he has made me suffer and that when i am laid low
and forgotten your whole honourable family will be enabled to rejoice in
his reformation and see many of those happy years together which my
good lord and my dear ladies you so kindly wish to

your ever-grateful and obliged
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxxxi

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
thursday night aug 10 


you have been informed by tourville how much belton's illness and
affairs have engaged me as well as mowbray and him since my former 
i called at smith's on monday in my way to epsom 

the lady was gone to chapel but i had the satisfaction to hear she was
not worse and left my compliments and an intimation that i should be
out of town for three or four days 

i refer myself to tourville who will let you know the difficulty we had
to drive out this meek mistress and frugal manager with her cubs and
to give the poor fellow's sister possession for him of his own house he
skulking mean while at an inn at croydon too dispirited to appear in his
own cause 

but i must observe that we were probably but just in time to save the
shattered remains of his fortune from this rapacious woman and her
accomplices for as he cannot live long and she thinks so we found she
had certainly taken measures to set up a marriage and keep possession of
all for herself and her sons 

tourville will tell you how i was forced to chastise the quondam hostler
in her sight before i could drive him out of the house he had the
insolence to lay hands on me and i made him take but one step from the
top to the bottom of a pair of stairs i thought his neck and all his
bones had been broken and then he being carried out neck-and-heels 
thomasine thought fit to walk out after him 

charming consequences of keeping the state we have been so fond of
extolling whatever it may be thought of in strong health sickness and
declining spirits in the keeper will bring him to see the difference 

she should soon have him she told a confidant in the space of six foot
by five meaning his bed and then she would let nobody come near him but
whom she pleased this hostler-fellow i suppose would then have been
his physician his will ready made for him and widows' weeds probably
ready provided who knows but she to appear in them in his own sight as
once i knew an instance in a wicked wife insulting a husband she hated 
when she thought him past recovery though it gave the man such spirits 
and such a turn that he got over it and lived to see her in her coffin 
dressed out in the very weeds she had insulted him in 

so much for the present for belton and his thomasine 


 


i begin to pity thee heartily now i see thee in earnest in the fruitless
love thou expressest to this angel of a woman and the rather as say
what thou wilt it is impossible she should get over her illness and her
friends' implacableness of which she has had fresh instances 

i hope thou art not indeed displeased with the extracts i have made from
thy letters for her the letting her know the justice thou hast done to
her virtue in them is so much in favour of thy ingenuousness a
quality let me repeat that gives thee a superiority over common
libertines that i think in my heart i was right though to any other
woman and to one who had not known the worst of thee that she could
know it might have been wrong 

if the end will justify the means it is plain that i have done well
with regard to ye both since i have made her easier and thee appear in
a better light to her than otherwise thou wouldst have done 

but if nevertheless thou art dissatisfied with my having obliged her in
a point which i acknowledge to be delicate let us canvas this matter at
our first meeting and then i will show thee what the extracts were and
what connections i gave them in thy favour 

but surely thou dost not pretend to say what i shall or shall not do as
to the executorship 

i am my own man i hope i think thou shouldst be glad to have the
justification of her memory left to one who at the same time thou
mayest be assured will treat thee and thy actions with all the lenity
the case will admit 

i cannot help expressing my surprise at one instance of thy
self-partiality and that is where thou sayest she has need indeed to
cry out for mercy herself from her friends who knows not how to show
any 

surely thou canst not think the cases alike for she as i understand 
desires but a last blessing and a last forgiveness for a fault in a
manner involuntary if a fault at all and does not so much as hope to be
received thou to be forgiven premeditated wrongs which nevertheless 
she forgives on condition to be no more molested by thee and hopest to
be received into favour and to make the finest jewel in the world thy
absolute property in consequence of that forgiveness 

i will now briefly proceed to relate what has passed since my last as to
the excellent lady by the account i shall give thee thou wilt see that
she has troubles enough upon her all springing originally from thyself 
without needing to add more to them by new vexations and as long as
thou canst exert thyself so very cavalierly at m hall where every one
is thy prisoner i see not but the bravery of thy spirit may be as well
gratified in domineering there over half a dozen persons of rank and
distinction as it could be over an helpless orphan as i may call this
lady since she has not a single friend to stand by her if i do not and
who will think herself happy if she can refuge herself from thee and
from all the world in the arms of death 

my last was dated on saturday 

on sunday in compliance with her doctor's advice she took a little
airing mrs lovick and mr smith and his wife were with her after
being at highgate chapel at divine service she treated them with a
little repast and in the afternoon was at islington church in her way
home returning tolerably cheerful 

she had received several letters in my absence as mrs lovick acquainted
me besides your's your's it seems much distressed her but she
ordered the messenger who pressed for an answer to be told that it did
not require an immediate one 

on wednesday she received a letter from her uncle harlowe in answer to
one she had written to her mother on saturday on her knees it must be a
very cruel one mrs lovick says by the effects it had upon her for 
when she received it she was intending to take an afternoon airing in a
coach but was thrown into so violent a fit of hysterics upon it that
she was forced to lie down and being not recovered by it to go to bed
about eight o'clock 


 see letter lxxxiv of this volume 


on thursday morning she was up very early and had recourse to the
scriptures to calm her mind as she told mrs lovick and weak as she
was would go in a chair to lincoln's-inn chapel about eleven she was
brought home a little better and then sat down to write to her uncle 
but was obliged to leave off several times to struggle as she told mrs 
lovick for an humble temper my heart said she to the good woman is
a proud heart and not yet i find enough mortified to my condition 
but do what i can will be for prescribing resenting things to my pen 

i arrived in town from belton's this thursday evening and went directly
to smith's she was too ill to receive my visit but on sending up my
compliments she sent me down word that she should be glad to see me in
the morning 

mrs lovick obliged me with the copy of a meditation collected by the
lady from the scriptures she has entitled it poor mortals the cause of
their own misery so entitled i presume with intention to take off the
edge of her repinings at hardships so disproportioned to her fault were
her fault even as great as she is inclined to think it we may see by
this the method she takes to fortify her mind and to which she owes in
a great measure the magnanimity with which she bears her undeserved
persecutions 


meditation


poor mortals the cause of their own misery 

say not thou it is through the lord that i fell away for thou oughtest
not to do the thing that he hateth 

say not thou he hath caused me to err for he hath no need of the sinful
man 

he himself made man from the beginning and left him in the hand of his
own counsel 

if thou wilt to keep the commandments and to perform acceptable
faithfulness 

he hath set fire and water before thee stretch forth thine hand to
whither thou wilt 

he hath commanded no man to do wickedly neither hath he given any man
license to sin 

and now lord what is my hope truly my hope is only in thee 

deliver me from all my offences and make me not a rebuke unto the
foolish 

when thou with rebuke dost chasten man for sin thou makest his beauty
to consume away like as it were a moth fretting a garment every man 
therefore is vanity 

turn thee unto me and have mercy upon me for i am desolate and
afflicted 

the troubles of my heart are enlarged o bring thou me out of my
distresses 


 


mrs smith gave me the following particulars of a conversation that
passed between herself and a young clergyman on tuesday afternoon who 
as it appears was employed to make inquiries about the lady by her
friends 

he came into the shop in a riding-habit and asked for some spanish
snuff and finding only mrs smith there he desired to have a little
talk with her in the back-shop 

he beat about the bush in several distant questions and at last began to
talk more directly about miss harlowe 

he said he knew her before her fall  that was his impudent word   and
gave the substance of the following account of her as i collected it
from mrs smith 

she was then he said the admiration and delight of every body he
lamented with great solemnity her backsliding another of his phrases 
mrs smith said he was a fine scholar for he spoke several things she
understood not and either in latin or greek she could not tell which 
but was so good as to give her the english of them without asking a
fine thing she said for a scholar to be so condescending 

he said her going off with so vile a rake had given great scandal and
offence to all the neighbouring ladies as well as to her friends 

he told mrs smith how much she used to be followed by every one's eye 
whenever she went abroad or to church and praised and blessed by every
tongue as she passed especially by the poor that she gave the fashion
to the fashionable without seeming herself to intend it or to know she
did that however it was pleasant to see ladies imitate her in dress
and behaviour who being unable to come up to her in grace and ease 
exposed but their own affectation and awkwardness at the time that they
thought themselves secure of general approbation because they wore the
same things and put them on in the same manner that she did who had
every body's admiration little considering that were her person like
their's or if she had their defects she would have brought up a very
different fashion for that nature was her guide in every thing and ease
her study which joined with a mingled dignity and condescension in her
air and manner whether she received or paid a compliment distinguished
her above all her sex 

he spoke not he said his own sentiments only on this occasion but
those of every body for that the praises of miss clarissa harlowe were
such a favourite topic that a person who could not speak well upon any
other subject was sure to speak well upon that because he could say
nothing but what he had heard repeated and applauded twenty times over 

hence it was perhaps that this novice accounted for the best things he
said himself though i must own that the personal knowledge of the lady 
which i am favoured with made it easy to me to lick into shape what the
good woman reported to me as the character given her by the young
levite for who even now in her decline of health sees not that all
these attributes belong to her 

i suppose he has not been long come from college and now thinks he has
nothing to do but to blaze away for a scholar among the ignorant as such
young fellows are apt to think those who cannot cap verses with them and
tell us how an antient author expressed himself in latin on a subject 
upon which however they may know how as well as that author to express
themselves in english 

mrs smith was so taken with him that she would fain have introduced him
to the lady not questioning but it would be very acceptable to her to
see one who knew her and her friends so well but this he declined for
several reasons as he call them which he gave one was that persons
of his cloth should be very cautious of the company they were in 
especially where sex was concerned and where a woman had slurred her
reputation  i wish i had been there when he gave himself these airs  
another that he was desired to inform himself of her present way of
life and who her visiters were for as to the praises mrs smith gave
the lady he hinted that she seemed to be a good-natured woman and
might though for the lady's sake he hoped not be too partial and
short-sighted to be trusted to absolutely in a concern of so high a
nature as he intimated the task was which he had undertaken nodding out
words of doubtful import and assuming airs of great significance as i
could gather throughout the whole conversation and when mrs smith
told him that the lady was in a very bad state of health he gave a
careless shrug she may be very ill says he her disappointments must
have touched her to the quick but she is not bad enough i dare say 
yet to atone for her very great lapse and to expect to be forgiven by
those whom she has so much disgraced 

a starched conceited coxcomb what would i give he had fallen in my way 

he departed highly satisfied with himself no doubt and assured of mrs 
smith's great opinion of his sagacity and learning but bid her not say
any thing to the lady about him or his inquiries and i for very
different reasons enjoined the same thing 

i am glad however for her peace of mind's sake that they begin to
think it behoves them to inquire about her 



letter lxxxii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
friday aug 11 


 mr belford acquaints his friend with the generosity of lord m and the
 ladies of his family and with the lady's grateful sentiments upon
 the occasion 

he says that in hopes to avoid the pain of seeing him mr lovelace 
 she intends to answer his letter of the 7th though much against
 her inclination  

she took great notice  says mr belford of that passage in your's 
which makes necessary to the divine pardon the forgiveness of a person
causelessly injured 

her grandfather i find has enabled her at eighteen years of age to
make her will and to devise great part of his estate to whom she pleases
of the family and the rest out of it if she die single at her own
discretion and this to create respect to her as he apprehended that she
would be envied and she now resolves to set about making her will out of
hand 


 mr belford insists upon the promise he had made him not to molest the
 lady and gives him the contents of her answer to lord m and the
 ladies of his lordship's family declining their generous offers 
 see letter lxxx of this volume 



letter lxxxiii

miss cl harlowe to robert lovelace esq 
friday aug 11 


it is a cruel alternative to be either forced to see you or to write to
you but a will of my own has been long denied me and to avoid a
greater evil nay now i may say the greatest i write 

were i capable of disguising or concealing my real sentiments i might
safely i dare say give you the remote hope you request and yet keep
all my resolutions but i must tell you sir it becomes my character
to tell you that were i to live more years than perhaps i may weeks 
and there were not another man in the world i could not i would not be
your's 

there is no merit in performing a duty 

religion enjoins me not only to forgive injuries but to return good for
evil it is all my consolation and i bless god for giving me that that
i am now in such a state of mind with regard to you that i can
cheerfully obey its dictates and accordingly i tell you that wherever
you go i wish you happy and in this i mean to include every good wish 

and now having with great reluctance i own complied with one of your
compulsatory alternatives i expect the fruits of it 

clarissa harlowe 



letter lxxxiv

mr john harlowe to miss cl harlowe
 in answer to her's to her mother see letter lxxv of this volume  
monday aug 7 


poor ungrateful naughty kinswoman 

your mother neither caring nor being permitted to write i am desired
to set pen to paper though i had resolved against it 

and so i am to tell you that your letters joined to the occasion of
them almost break the hearts of us all 

were we sure you had seen your folly and were truly penitent and at
the same time that you were so very ill as you pretend i know not what
might be done for you but we are all acquainted with your moving ways
when you want to carry a point 

unhappy girl how miserable have you made us all we who used to visit
with so much pleasure now cannot endure to look upon one another 

if you had not know upon an hundred occasions how dear you once was to
us you might judge of it now were you to know how much your folly has
unhinged us all 

naughty naughty girl you see the fruits of preferring a rake and
libertine to a man of sobriety and morals against full warning against
better knowledge and such a modest creature too as you were how
could you think of such an unworthy preference 

your mother can't ask and your sister knows not in modesty how to ask 
and so i ask you if you have any reason to think yourself with child by
this villain you must answer this and answer it truly before any
thing can be resolved upon about you 

you may well be touched with a deep remorse for your misdeeds could i
ever have thought that my doting-piece as every one called you would
have done thus to be sure i loved you too well but that is over now 
yet though i will not pretend to answer for any body but myself for my
own part i say god forgive you and this is all from

your afflicted uncle 
john harlowe 


 


the following meditation was stitched to the bottom of this letter with
black silk 


meditation

o that thou wouldst hide me in the grave that thou wouldst keep me
secret till thy wrath be past 

my face is foul with weeping and on my eye-lid is the shadow of death 

my friends scorn me but mine eye poureth out tears unto god 

a dreadful sound is in my ears in prosperity the destroyer came upon me 

i have sinned what shall i do unto thee o thou preserver of men why
hast thou set me as a mark against thee so that i am a burden to myself 

when i say my bed shall comfort me my couch shall ease my complaint 

then thou scarest me with dreams and terrifiest me through visions 

so that my soul chooseth strangling and death rather than life 

i loath it i would not live always let me alone for my days are
vanity 

he hath made me a bye-word of the people and aforetime i was as a
tabret 

my days are past my purposes are broken off even the thoughts of my
heart 

when i looked for good then evil came unto me and when i waited for
light then came darkness 

and where now is my hope 

yet all the days of my appointed time will i wait till my change come 



letter lxxxv

miss clarissa harlowe to john harlowe esq 
thursday aug 10 


honoured sir 

it was an act of charity i begged only for a last blessing that i might
die in peace i ask not to be received again as my severe sister  oh 
that i had not written to her   is pleased to say is my view let that
grace be denied me when i do 

i could not look forward to my last scene with comfort without seeking 
at least to obtain the blessing i petitioned for and that with a
contrition so deep that i deserved not were it known to be turned over
from the tender nature of a mother to the upbraiding pen of an uncle 
and to be wounded by a cruel question put by him in a shocking manner 
and which a little a very little time will better answer than i can 
for i am not either a hardened or shameless creature if i were i should
not have been so solicitous to obtain the favour i sued for 

and permit me to say that i asked it as well for my father and mother's
sake as for my own for i am sure they at least will be uneasy after i
am gone that they refused it to me 

i should still be glad to have theirs and your's sir and all your
blessings and your prayers but denied in such a manner i will not
presume again to ask it relying entirely on the almighty's which is
never denied when supplicated for with such true penitence as i hope
mine is 

god preserve my dear uncle and all my honoured friends prays

your unhappy
clarissa harlowe 



contents of volume viii


letter i miss howe from the isle of wight 
in answer to her's no lxi of vol vii approves not of her choice of
belford for her executor yet thinks she cannot appoint for that office
any of her own family hopes she will live any years 

letter ii clarissa to miss howe 
sends her a large packet of letters but for her relations' sake not
all she has received must now abide by the choice of mr belford for
executor but farther refers to the papers she sends her for her
justification on this head 

letter iii antony harlowe to clarissa 
a letter more taunting and reproachful than that of her other uncle to
what owing 

letter iv clarissa in answer 
wishes that the circumstances of her case had been inquired into 
concludes with a solemn and pathetic prayer for the happiness of the
whole family 

letter v mrs norton to clarissa 
her friends through brand's reports as she imagines intent upon her
going to the plantations wishes her to discourage improper visiters 
difficult situations the tests of prudence as well as virtue dr 
lewen's solicitude for her welfare her cousin morden arrived in
england farther pious consolations 

letter vi clarissa in answer 
sends her a packet of letters which for her relations' sake she cannot
communicate to miss howe from these she will collect a good deal of her
story defends yet gently blames her mother afraid that her cousin
morden will be set against her or what is worse that he will seek to
avenge her her affecting conclusion on her norton's divine
consolations 

letter vii lovelace to belford 
is very ill the lady if he die will repent her refusal of him one
of the greatest felicities that can befal a woman what extremely ill 
his ludicrous behaviour on awaking and finding a clergyman and his
friends praying for him by his bedside 

letter viii belford to lovelace 
concerned at his illness wishes that he had died before last april 
the lady he tells him generously pities him and prays that he may meet
with the mercy he has not shown 

letter ix lovelace to belford 
in raptures on her goodness to him his deep regrets for his treatment
of her blesses her 

letter x belford to lovelace 
congratulates him on his amendment the lady's exalted charity to him 
her story a fine subject for tragedy compares with it and censures 
the play of the fair penitent she is very ill the worse for some new
instances of the implacableness of her relations a meditation on the
subject poor belton he tells him is at death's door and desirous to
see him 

letter xi belford to clarissa 
acquaints her with the obligation he is under to go to belton and lest
she should be surprised with lovelace's resolution as signified in the
next letter to visit her 

letter xii lovelace to belford 
resolves to throw himself at the lady's feet lord m of opinion that
she ought to admit of one interview 

letter xiii from the same 
arrived in london he finds the lady gone abroad suspects belford his
unaccountable freaks at smith's his motives for behaving so ludicrously
there the vile sally martin entertains him with her mimicry of the
divine lady 

letter xiv from the same 
his frightful dream how affected by it sleeping or waking his
clarissa always present with him hears she is returned to her lodgings 
is hastening to her 

letter xv from the same 
disappointed again is affected by mrs lovick's expostulations is
shown a meditation on being hunted after by the enemy of her soul as it
is entitled his light comments upon it leaves word that he resolves
to see her makes several other efforts for that purpose 

letter xvi belford to lovelace 
reproaches him that he has not kept his honour with him inveighs
against and severely censures him for his light behaviour at smith's 
belton's terrors and despondency mowbray's impenetrable behaviour 

letter xvii from the same 
mowbray's impatience to run from a dying belton to a too-lively lovelace 
mowbray abuses mr belton's servant in the language of a rake of the
common class reflection on the brevity of life 

letter xviii lovelace to belford 
receives a letter from clarissa written by way of allegory to induce him
to forbear hunting after her copy of it he takes it in a literal
sense exults upon it will now hasten down to lord m and receive the
gratulations of all his family on her returning favour gives an
interpretation of his frightful dream to his own liking 

letter xix xx from the same 
pities belton rakishly defends him on the issue of a duel which now
adds to the poor man's terrors his opinion of death and the fear of
it reflections upon the conduct of play-writers with regard
servants he cannot account for the turn his clarissa has taken in his
favour hints at one hopeful cause of it now matrimony seems to be in
his power he has some retrograde motions 

letter xxi belford to lovelace 
continuation of his narrative of belton's last illness and impatience 
the poor man abuses the gentlemen of the faculty belford censures some
of them for their greediness after fees belton dies serious
reflections on the occasion 

letter xxii lovelace to belford 
hopes belton is happy and why he is setting out for berks 

letter xxiii belford to lovelace 
attends the lady she is extremely ill and receives the sacrament 
complains of the harasses his friend had given her two different
persons from her relations he supposes inquire after her her
affecting address to the doctor apothecary and himself disposes of
some more of her apparel for a very affecting purpose 

letter xxiv dr lewen to clarissa 
writes on his pillow to prevail upon her to prosecute lovelace for his
life 

letter xxv her pathetic and noble answer 

letter xxvi miss arabella harlowe to clarissa 
proposes in a most taunting and cruel manner the prosecution of
lovelace or if not her going to pensylvania 

letter xxvii clarissa's affecting answer 

letter xxviii xxix mrs norton to clarissa 
her uncle's cruel letter to what owing colonel morden resolved on a
visit to lovelace mrs hervey in a private conversation with her 
accounts for yet blames the cruelty of her family miss dolly hervey
wishes to attend her 

letter xxx clarissa in answer 
thinks she has been treated with great rigour by her relations 
expresses more warmth than usual on this subject yet soon checks
herself grieves that colonel morden resolves on a visit to lovelace 
touches upon her sister's taunting letter requests mrs norton's
prayers for patience and resignation 

letter xxxi miss howe to clarissa 
approves now of her appointment of belford for an executor admires her
greatness of mind in despising lovelace every body she is with taken
with hickman yet she cannot help wantoning with the power his obsequious
love gives her over him 

letter xxxii xxxiii clarissa to miss howe 
instructive lessons and observations on her treatment of hickman 
acquaints her with all that has happened since her last fears that all
her allegorical letter is not strictly right is forced by illness to
break off resumes wishes her married 

letter xxxiv mr wyerley to clarissa 
a generous renewal of his address to her now in her calamity and a
tender of his best services 

letter xxxv her open kind and instructive answer 

letter xxxvi lovelace to belford 
uneasy on a suspicion that her letter to him was a stratagem only what
he will do if he find it so 

letter xxxvii belford to lovelace 
brief account of his proceedings in belton's affairs the lady extremely
ill thought to be near her end has a low-spirited day recovers her
spirits and thinks herself above this world she bespeaks her coffin 
confesses that her letter to lovelace was allegorical only the light in
which belford beholds her 

letter xxxviii belford to lovelace 
an affecting conversation that passed between the lady and dr h she
talks of death he says and prepares for it as if it were an occurrence
as familiar to her as dressing and undressing worthy behaviour of the
doctor she makes observations on the vanity of life on the wisdom of
an early preparation for death and on the last behaviour of belton 

letter xxxix xl xli lovelace to belford 
particulars of what passed between himself colonel morden lord m and
mowbray on the visit made him by the colonel proposes belford to miss
charlotte montague by way of raillery for an husband he encloses
brand's letter which misrepresents from credulity and officiousness 
rather than ill-will the lady's conduct 

letter xlii belford to lovelace 
expatiates on the baseness of deluding young creatures whose confidence
has been obtained by oaths vows promises evil of censoriousness 
people deemed good too much addicted to it desires to know what he
means my his ridicule with regard to his charming cousin 

letter xliii from the same 
a proper test of the purity of writing the lady again makes excuses for
her allegorical letter her calm behaviour and generous and useful
reflections on his communicating to her brand's misrepresentations of
her conduct 

letter xliv colonel morden to clarissa 
offers his assistance and service to make the best of what has happened 
advises her to marry lovelace as the only means to bring about a general
reconciliation has no doubt of his resolution to do her justice 
desires to know if she has 

letter xlv clarissa in answer 

letter xlvi lovelace to belford 
his reasonings and ravings on finding the lady's letter to him only an
allegorical one in the midst of these the natural gayety of his heart
runs him into ridicule on belford his ludicrous image drawn from a
monument in westminster abbey resumes his serious disposition if the
worst happen the lord of heaven and earth says he avert that worst 
he bids him only write that he advises him to take a trip to paris and
that will stab him to the heart 

letter xlvii belford to lovelace 
the lady's coffin brought up stairs he is extremely shocked and
discomposed at it her intrepidity great minds he observes cannot
avoid doing uncommon things reflections on the curiosity of women 

letter xlviii from the same 
description of the coffin and devices on the lid it is placed in her
bed-chamber his serious application to lovelace on her great behaviour 

letter xlix from the same 
astonished at his levity in the abbey-instance the lady extremely ill 

letter l lovelace to belford 
all he has done to the lady a jest to die for since her triumph has ever
been greater than her sufferings he will make over all his possessions
and all his reversions to the doctor if he will but prolong her life for
one twelvemonth how but for her calamities could her equanimity blaze
out as it does he would now love her with an intellectual flame he
cannot bear to think that the last time she so triumphantly left him
should be the last his conscience he says tears him he is sick of
the remembrance of his vile plots 

letter li belford to lovelace 
the lady alive serene and calm the more serene for having finished 
signed and sealed her last will deferred till now for reasons of filial
duty 

letter lii miss howe to clarissa 
pathetically laments the illness of her own mother and of her dear
friend now all her pertness to the former she says fly in her face 
she lays down her pen and resumes it to tell her with great joy that
her mother is better she has had a visit form her cousin morden what
passed in it 

letter liii from the same 
displeased with the colonel for thinking too freely of the sex never
knew a man that had a slight notion of the virtue of women in general 
who deserved to be valued for his morals why women must either be more
or less virtuous than men useful hints to young ladies is out of
humour with mr hickman resolves to see her soon in town 

letter liv belford to lovelace 
the lady writes and reads upon her coffin as upon a desk the doctor
resolves to write to her father her intense yet cheerful devotion 

letter lv clarissa to miss howe 
a letter full of pious reflections and good advice both general and
particular and breathing the true spirit of charity forgiveness 
patience and resignation a just reflection to her dear friend upon
the mortifying nature of pride 

letter lvi mrs norton to clarissa 
her account of an interesting conversation at harlowe-place between the
family and colonel morden and of another between her mother and self 
the colonel incensed against them all her advice concerning belford 
and other matters miss howe has obtained leave she hears to visit
her praises mr hickman gently censures miss howe on his account 
her truly maternal and pious comfortings 

letter lvii belford to lovelace 
the lady's sight begins to fail her she blesses god for the serenity
she enjoys it is what she says she had prayed for what a blessing 
so near to her dissolution to have her prayers answered gives
particular directions to him about her papers about her last will and
apparel comforts the women and him on their concern for her another
letter brought her from colonel morden the substance of it belford
writes to hasten up the colonel dr h has also written to her father 
and brand to mr john harlowe a letter recanting his officious one 

letter lviii dr h to james harlowe senior esq 

letter lix copy of mr belford's letter to colonel morden 
to hasten him up 

letter lx lovelace to belford 
he feels the torments of the damned in the remorse that wrings his
heart on looking back on his past actions by this lady gives him what
he calls a faint picture of his horrible uneasiness riding up and down 
expecting the return of his servant as soon as he had dispatched him 
woe be to the man who brings him the fatal news 

letter lxi belford to lovelace 
farther particulars of the lady's pious and exemplary behaviour she
rejoices in the gradual death afforded her her thankful acknowledgments
to mr belford mrs smith and mrs lovick for their kindness to her 
her edifying address to mr belford 

letter lxii clarissa to mrs norton in answer to her's no lvi 
afflicted only for her friends desires not now to see her cousin
morden nor even herself or miss howe god will have no rivals she
says in the hearts of those whom he sanctifies advice to miss howe 
to mr hickman blesses all her relations and friends 

letter lxiii lovelace to belford 
a letter of deep distress remorse and impatience yet would he fain
lighten his own guilt by reflections on the cruelty of her relations 

letter lxiv belford to lovelace
the lady is disappointed at the doctor's telling her that she may yet
live two or three days death from grief the slowest of deaths her
solemn forgiveness of lovelace and prayer for him owns that once she
could have loved him her generous concern for his future happiness 
belford's good resolutions 

letter lxv mr brand to mr john walton 

letter lxvi mr brand to john harlowe esq 
in excuse of his credulity and of the misreports founded upon it 

letter lxvii lovelace to belford 
blesses him for sending him word the lady is better her charity towards
him cuts him to the heart he cannot bear it his vehement self
reproaches curses his contriving genius and his disbelief that there
could be such virtue in woman the world never saw such an husband as he
will make if she recover and will be his 

letter lxviii belford to lovelace 
the lady's pious frame the approaches of death how supportable to her 
and why she has no reason she says to grieve for any thing but the
sorrow she has given to her friends 

letter lxix lovelace to belford 
never prayed in his life put all the years of it together as he has
done for this fortnight has repented of all his baseness and will
nothing do conjures him to send him good news in his next as he would
not be answerable for consequences 

letter lxx belford to lovelace 
solemn leave taken of her by the doctor and apothecary who tell her she
will hardly see the next night the pleasure with which she receives the
intimation how unlike poor belton's behaviour her's a letter from
miss howe copy of it she cannot see to read it her exalted
expressions on hearing it read tries to write an answer to it but
cannot dictates to mrs lovick writes the superscriptive part herself
on her knees colonel morden arrives in town 

letter lxxi from the same 
what passes on colonel morden's visit to his cousin she enjoins the
colonel not to avenge her 




the history

of

clarissa harlowe



letter i

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
yarmouth isle of wight monday aug 7 


my dearest creature 

i can write but just now a few lines i cannot tell how to bear the
sound of that mr belford for your executor cogent as your reasons for
that measure are and yet i am firmly of opinion that none of your
relations should be named for the trust but i dwell the less on this
subject as i hope and cannot bear to apprehend the contrary that you
will still live many many years 

mr hickman indeed speaks very handsomely of mr belford but he poor
man has not much penetration if he had he would hardly think so well
of me as he does 

i have a particular opportunity of sending this by a friend of my aunt
harman's who is ready to set out for london and this occasions my
hurry and is to return out of hand i expect therefore by him a large
packet from you and hope and long for news of your amended health which
heaven grant to the prayers of

your ever-affectionate
anna howe 



letter ii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
friday aug 11 


i will send you a large packet as you desire and expect since i can do
it by so safe a conveyance but not all that is come to my hand for i
must own that my friends are very severe too severe for any body who
loves them not to see their letters you my dear would not call them
my friends you said long ago but my relations indeed i cannot call
them my relations i think but i am ill and therefore perhaps more
peevish than i should be it is difficult to go out of ourselves to give
a judgment against ourselves and yet oftentimes to pass a just
judgment we ought 

i thought i should alarm you in the choice of my executor but the sad
necessity i am reduced to must excuse me 

i shall not repeat any thing i have said before on that subject but if
your objections will not be answered to your satisfaction by the papers
and letters i shall enclose marked 1 2 3 4 to 9 i must think myself
in another instance unhappy since i am engaged too far and with my own
judgment too to recede 

as mr belford has transcribed for me in confidence from his friend's
letters the passages which accompany this i must insist that you suffer
no soul but yourself to peruse them and that you return them by the very
first opportunity that so no use may be made of them that may do hurt
either to the original writer or to the communicator you'll observe i
am bound by promise to this care if through my means any mischief
should arise between this humane and that inhuman libertine i should
think myself utterly inexcusable 

i subjoin a list of the papers or letters i shall enclose you must
return them all when perused 


 1 a letter from miss montague dated aug 1 
 2 a copy of my answer aug 3 
 3 mr belford's letter to me which will show
 you what my request was to him and his
 compliance with it and the desired ex-
 tracts from his friend's letters aug 3 4 
 4 a copy of my answer with thanks and re-
 questing him to undertake the executor-
 ship aug 4 
 5 mr belford's acceptance of the trust aug 4 
 6 miss montague's letter with a generous
 offer from lord m and the ladies of that
 family aug 7 
 7 mr lovelace's to me aug 7 
 8 copy of mine to miss montague in answer
 to her's of the day before aug 8 
 9 copy of my answer to mr lovelace aug 11 

you will see by these several letters written and received in so little
a space of time to say nothing of what i have received and written which
i cannot show you how little opportunity or leisure i can have for
writing my own story 


i am very much tired and fatigued with i don't know what with writing 
i think but most with myself and with a situation i cannot help
aspiring to get out of and above 

o my dear the world we live in is a sad a very sad world while
under our parents' protecting wings we know nothing at all of it 
book-learned and a scribbler and looking at people as i saw them as
visiters or visiting i thought i knew a great deal of it pitiable
ignorance alas i knew nothing at all 

with zealous wishes for your happiness and the happiness of every one
dear to you i am and will ever be 

your gratefully-affectionate
cl harlowe 



letter iii

mr antony harlowe to miss cl harlowe
 in reply to her's to her uncle harlowe of thursday aug 10  
aug 12 


unhappy girl 

as your uncle harlowe chooses not to answer your pert letter to him 
and as mine written to you before was written as if it were in the
spirit of prophecy as you have found to your sorrow and as you are now
making yourself worse than you are in your health and better than you
are in your penitence as we are very well assured in order to move
compassion which you do not deserve having had so much warning for all
these reasons i take up my pen once more though i had told your
brother at his going to edinburgh that i would not write to you even
were you to write to me without letting him know so indeed had we all 
for he prognosticated what would happen as to your applying to us when
you knew not how to help it 


 see vol i letter xxxii 


brother john has hurt your niceness it seems by asking you a plain
question which your mother's heart is too full of grief to let her ask 
and modesty will not let your sister ask though but the consequence of
your actions and yet it must be answered before you'll obtain from your
father and mother and us the notice you hope for i can tell you that 

you lived several guilty weeks with one of the vilest fellows that ever
drew breath at bed as well as at board no doubt for is not his
character known and pray don't be ashamed to be asked after what may
naturally come of such free living this modesty indeed would have
become you for eighteen years of your life you'll be pleased to mark
that but makes no good figure compared with your behaviour since the
beginning of april last so pray don't take it up and wipe your mouth
upon it as if nothing had happened 

but may be i likewise am to shocking to your niceness o girl girl 
your modesty had better been shown at the right time and place every
body but you believed what the rake was but you would believe nothing
bad of him what think you now 

your folly has ruined all our peace and who knows where it may yet end 
 your poor father but yesterday showed me this text with bitter grief
he showed it me poor man and do you lay it to your heart 

a father waketh for his daughter when no man knoweth and the care for
her taketh away his sleep when she is young lest she pass away the
flower of her age  and you know what proposals were made to you at
different times   and being married lest she should be hated in her
virginity lest she should be defiled and gotten with child in her
father's house  and i don't make the words mind that   and having an
husband lest she should misbehave herself  and what follows keep
a sure watch over a shameless daughter  yet no watch could hold you  
lest she make thee a laughing stock to thine enemies  as you have made
us all to this cursed lovelace   and a bye-word in the city and a
reproach among the people and make thee ashamed before the multitude 
ecclus xlii 9 10 etc 

now will you wish you had not written pertly your sister's severities 
 never girl say that is severe that is deserved you know the meaning
of words no body better would to the lord you had acted up but to one
half of what you know then had we not been disappointed and grieved as
we all have been and nobody more than him who was

your loving uncle 
antony harlowe 

this will be with you to-morrow perhaps you may be suffered to have
 some part of your estate after you have smarted a little more 
 your pertly-answered uncle john who is your trustee will not have
 you be destitute but we hope all is not true that we hear of you 
 only take care i advise you that bad as you have acted you
 act not still worse if it be possible to act worse improve upon
 the hint 



letter iv

miss cl harlowe to antony harlowe esq 
sunday aug 13 


honoured sir 

i am very sorry for my pert letter to my uncle harlowe yet i did not
intend it to be pert people new to misfortune may be too easily moved
to impatience 

the fall of a regular person no doubt is dreadful and inexcusable 
is like the sin of apostacy would to heaven however that i had had
the circumstances of mine inquired into 

if sir i make myself worse than i am in my health and better than i am
in my penitence it is fit i should be punished for my double
dissimulation and you have the pleasure of being one of my punishers 
my sincerity in both respects will however be best justified by the
event to that i refer may heaven give you always as much comfort in
reflecting upon the reprobation i have met with as you seem to have
pleasure in mortifying a young creature extremely mortified and that
from a right sense as she presumes to hope of her own fault 

what you heard of me i cannot tell when the nearest and dearest
relations give up an unhappy wretch it is not to be wondered at that
those who are not related to her are ready to take up and propagate
slanders against her yet i think i may defy calumny itself and
 excepting the fatal though involuntary step of april 10 wrap myself in
my own innocence and be easy i thank you sir nevertheless for your
caution mean it what it will 

as to the question required of me to answer and which is allowed to be
too shocking either for a mother to put to a daughter or a sister to a
sister and which however you say i must answer o sir and must i
answer this then be my answer a little time a much less time than
is imagined will afford a more satisfactory answer to my whole family 
and even to my brother and sister than i can give in words 

nevertheless be pleased to let it be remembered that i did not petition
for a restoration to favour i could not hope for that nor yet to be
put in possession of any part of my own estate nor even for means of
necessary subsistence from the produce of that estate but only for a
blessing for a last blessing 

and this i will farther add because it is true that i have no wilful
crime to charge against myself no free living at bed and at board as
you phrase it 

why why sir were not other inquiries made of me as well as this
shocking one inquiries that modesty would have permitted a mother or
sister to make and which if i may be excused to say so would have been
still less improper and more charitable to have been made by uncles 
 were the mother forbidden or the sister not inclined to make them 
than those they have made 

although my humble application has brought upon me so much severe
reproach i repent not that i have written to my mother although i
cannot but wish that i had not written to my sister because i have
satisfied a dutiful consciousness by it however unanswered by the
wished-for success nevertheless i cannot help saying that mine is
indeed a hard fate that i cannot beg pardon for my capital errors
without doing it in such terms as shall be an aggravation of the offence 

but i had best leave off lest as my full mind i find is rising to my
pen i have other pardons to beg as i multiply lines where none at all
will be given 

god almighty bless preserve and comfort my dear sorrowing and
grievously offended father and mother and continue in honour favour 
and merit my happy sister may god forgive my brother and protect him
from the violence of his own temper as well as from the destroyer of his
sister's honour and may you my dear uncle and your no less now than
ever dear brother my second papa as he used to bid me call him be
blessed and happy in them and in each other and in order to this may
you all speedily banish from your remembrance for ever 

the unhappy
clarissa harlowe 



letter v

mrs norton to miss clarissa harlowe
monday aug 14 


all your friends here my dear young lady now seem set upon proposing to
you to go to one of the plantations this i believe is owing to some
misrepresentations of mr brand from whom they have received a letter 

i wish with all my heart that you could consistently with your own
notions of honour yield to the pressing requests of all mr lovelace's
family in his behalf this i think would stop every mouth and in
time reconcile every body to you for your own friends will not believe
that he is in earnest to marry you and the hatred between the families
is such that they will not condescend to inform themselves better nor
would believe him if he were ever so solemnly to avow that he is 

i should be very glad to have in readiness upon occasion some brief
particulars of your sad story under your own hand but let me tell you 
at the same time that no misrepresentations nor even your own
confession shall lessen my opinion either of your piety or of your
prudence in essential points because i know it was always your humble
way to make light faults heavy against yourself and well might you my
dearest young lady aggravate your own failings who have ever had so
few and those few so slight that your ingenuousness has turned most of
them into excellencies 

nevertheless let me advise you my dear miss clary to discountenance
any visits which with the censorious may affect your character as
that has not hitherto suffered by your wilful default i hope you will
not in a desponding negligence satisfying yourself with a consciousness
of your own innocence permit it to suffer difficult situations you
know my dear young lady are the tests not only of prudence but of
virtue 

i think i must own to you that since mr brand's letter has been
received i have a renewed prohibition to attend you however if you
will give me leave that shall not detain me from you nor would i stay
for that leave if i were not in hopes that in this critical situation 
i may be able to do you service here 

i have often had messages and inquiries after your health from the
truly-reverend dr lewen who has always expressed and still expresses 
infinite concern for you he entirely disapproves of the measures of the
family with regard to you he is too much indisposed to go abroad but 
were he in good health he would not as i understand visit at
harlowe-place having some time since been unhandsomely treated by your
brother on his offering to mediate for you with your family 


 


i am just now informed that your cousin morden is arrived in england he
is at canterbury it seems looking after some concerns he has there and
is soon expected in these parts who knows what may arise from his
arrival god be with you my dearest miss clary and be your comforter
and sustainer and never fear but he will for i am sure i am very
sure that you put your whole trust in him 

and what after all is this world on which we so much depend for
durable good poor creatures that we are when all the joys of it and
 what is a balancing comfort all the troubles of it are but momentary 
and vanish like a morning dream 

and be this remembered my dearest young lady that worldly joy claims no
kindred with the joys we are bid to aspire after these latter we must
be fitted for by affliction and disappointment you are therefore in the
direct road to glory however thorny the path you are in and i had
almost said that it depends upon yourself by your patience and by your
resignedness to the dispensation god enabling you who never fails the
true penitent and sincere invoker to be an heir of a blessed
immortality 

but this glory i humbly pray that you may not be permitted to enter
into ripe as you are so soon to be for it till with your gentle hand 
 a pleasure i have so often as you now promised to myself you have
closed the eyes of

your maternally-affectionate
judith norton 



letter vi

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs norton
thursday aug 27 


what mr brand or any body can have written or said to my prejudice i
cannot imagine and yet some evil reports have gone out against me as i
find by some hints in a very severe letter written to me by my uncle
antony such a letter as i believe was never written to any poor
creature who by ill health of body as well as of mind was before
tottering on the brink of the grave but my friends may possibly be
better justified than the reporters for who knows what they may have
heard 

you give me a kind caution which seems to imply more than you express 
when you advise me against countenancing visiters that may discredit me 
you have spoken quite out surely i have had afflictions enow to
strengthen my mind and to enable it to bear the worst that can now
happen but i will not puzzle myself by conjectural evils as i might
perhaps do if i had not enow that were certain i shall hear all when
it is thought proper that i should mean time let me say for your
satisfaction that i know not that i have any thing criminal or
disreputable to answer for either in word or deed since the fatal 10th
of april last 

you desire an account of what passes between me and my friends and also
particulars or brief heads of my sad story in order to serve me as
occasion shall offer my dear good mrs norton you shall have a whole
packet of papers which i have sent to my miss howe when she returns
them and you shall have likewise another packet and that with this
letter which i cannot at present think of sending to that dear friend
for the sake of my own relations whom without seeing that packet she
is but too ready to censure heavily from these you will be able to
collect a great deal of my story but for what is previous to these
papers and which more particularly relates to what i have suffered from
mr lovelace you must have patience for at present i have neither head
nor heart for such subjects the papers i send you with this will be
those mentioned in the margin you must restore them to me as soon as
perused and upon your honour make no use of them or of any intelligence
you have from me but by my previous consent 


 1 a copy of mine to my sister begging
 off my father's malediction dated july 21 
 2 my sister's answer dated july 27 
 3 copy of my second letter to my sister dated july 29 
 4 my sister's answer dated aug 3 
 5 copy of my letter to my mother dated aug 5 
 6 my uncle harlowe's letter dated aug 7 
 7 copy of my answer to it dated the 1oth 
 8 letter from my uncle antony dated the 12th 
 9 and lastly the copy of my answer to it dated the 13th 


these communications you must not my good mrs norton look upon as
appeals against my relations on the contrary i am heartily sorry that
they have incurred the displeasure of so excellent a divine as dr lewen 
but you desire to have every thing before you and i think you ought for
who knows as you say but you may be applied to at last to administer
comfort from their conceding hearts to one that wants it and who
sometimes judging by what she knows of her own heart thinks herself
entitled to it 

i know that i have a most indulgent and sweet-tempered mother but 
having to deal with violent spirits she has too often forfeited that
peace of mind which she so much prefers by her over concern to preserve
it 

i am sure she would not have turned me over for an answer to a letter
written with so contrite and fervent a spirit as was mine to her to a
masculine spirit had she been left to herself 

but my dear mrs norton might not think you the revered lady have
favoured me with one private line if not might not you have written
by her order or connivance one softening one motherly line when she
saw her poor girl whom once she dearly loved borne so hard upon 

o no she might not because her heart to be sure is in their
measures and if she think them right perhaps they must be right at
least knowing only what they know they must and yet they might know
all if they would and possibly in their own good time they think to
make proper inquiry my application was made to them but lately yet
how deeply will it afflict them if their time should be out of time 

when you have before you the letters i have sent to miss howe you will
see that lord m and the ladies of his family jealous as they are of the
honour of their house to express myself in their language think
better of me than my own relations do you will see an instance of their
generosity to me which at the time extremely affected me and indeed
still affects me unhappy man gay inconsiderate and cruel what has
been his gain by making unhappy a creature who hoped to make him happy 
and who was determined to deserve the love of all to whom he is related 
 poor man but you will mistake a compassionate and placable nature for
love he took care great care that i should rein-in betimes any
passion that i might have had for him had he known how to be but
commonly grateful or generous but the almighty knows what is best for
his poor creatures 

some of the letters in the same packet will also let you into the
knowledge of a strange step which i have taken strange you will think
it and at the same time give you my reasons for taking it 


 she means that of making mr belford her executor 


it must be expected that situations uncommonly difficult will make
necessary some extraordinary steps which but for those situations 
would be hardly excusable it will be very happy indeed and somewhat
wonderful if all the measures i have been driven to take should be
right a pure intention void of all undutiful resentment is what must
be my consolation whatever others may think of those measures when they
come to know them which however will hardly be till it is out of my
power to justify them or to answer for myself 

i am glad to hear of my cousin morden's safe arrival i should wish to
see him methinks but i am afraid that he will sail with the stream as
it must be expected that he will hear what they have to say first but
what i most fear is that he will take upon himself to avenge me rather
than he should do so i would have him look upon me as a creature utterly
unworthy of his concern at least of his vindictive concern 

how soothing to the wounded heart of your clarissa how balmy are the
assurances of your continued love and favour love me my dear mamma
norton continue to love me to the end i now think that i may without
presumption promise to deserve your love to the end and when i am
gone cherish my memory in your worthy heart for in so doing you will
cherish the memory of one who loves and honours you more than she can
express 

but when i am no more i charge you as soon as you can the smarting
pangs of grief that will attend a recent loss and let all be early
turned into that sweetly melancholy regard to memory which engaging us
to forget all faults and to remember nothing but what was thought
amiable gives more pleasure than pain to survivors especially if they
can comfort themselves with the humble hope that the divine mercy has
taken the dear departed to itself 

and what is the space of time to look backward upon between an early
departure and the longest survivance and what the consolation attending
the sweet hope of meeting again never more to be separated never more
to be pained grieved or aspersed but mutually blessing and being
blessed to all eternity 

in the contemplation of this happy state in which i hope in god's good
time to rejoice with you my beloved mrs norton and also with my dear
relations all reconciled to and blessing the child against whom they
are now so much incensed i conclude myself

your ever dutiful and affectionate
clarissa harlowe 



letter vii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
sunday aug 13 


i don't know what a devil ails me but i never was so much indisposed in
my life at first i thought some of my blessed relations here had got a
dose administered to me in order to get the whole house to themselves 
but as i am the hopes of the family i believe they would not be so
wicked 

i must lay down my pen i cannot write with any spirit at all what a
plague can be the matter with me 


 


lord m paid me just now a cursed gloomy visit to ask how i do after
bleeding his sisters both drove away yesterday god be thanked but
they asked not my leave and hardly bid me good-bye my lord was more
tender and more dutiful than i expected men are less unforgiving than
women i have reason to say so i am sure for besides implacable miss
harlowe and the old ladies the two montague apes han't been near me
yet 


 


neither eat drink nor sleep a piteous case jack if i should die
like a fool now people would say miss harlowe had broken my heart that
she vexes me to the heart is certain 

confounded squeamish i would fain write it off but must lay down my
pen again it won't do poor lovelace what a devil ails thee 


 


well but now let's try for't hoy hoy hoy confound me for a gaping
puppy how i yawn where shall i begin at thy executorship thou shalt
have a double office of it for i really think thou mayest send me a
coffin and a shroud i shall be ready for them by the time they can come
down 

what a little fool is this miss harlowe i warrant she'll now repent
that she refused me such a lovely young widow what a charming widow
would she have made how would she have adorned the weeds to be a widow
in the first twelve months is one of the greatest felicities that can
befal a fine woman such pretty employment in new dismals when she had
hardly worn round her blazing joyfuls such lights and such shades how
would they set off one another and be adorned by the wearer 

go to the devil i will write can i do anything else 

they would not have me write belford i must be ill indeed when i
can't write 


 


but thou seemest nettled jack is it because i was stung it is not
for two friends any more than for man and wife to be out of patience
at one time what must be the consequence if they are i am in no
fighting mood just now but as patient and passive as the chickens that
are brought me in broth for i am come to that already 

but i can tell thee for all this be thy own man if thou wilt as to
the executorship i will never suffer thee to expose my letters they
are too ingenuous by half to be seen and i absolutely insist upon it 
that on receipt of this thou burn them all 

i will never forgive thee that impudent and unfriendly reflection of my
cavaliering it here over half a dozen persons of distinction remember 
too thy words poor helpless orphan these reflections are too serious 
and thou art also too serious for me to let these things go off as
jesting notwithstanding the roman style is preserved and indeed but
just preserved by my soul jack if i had not been taken thus
egregiously cropsick i would have been up with thee and the lady too 
before now 


 for what these gentlemen mean by the roman style see vol i letter
xxxi in the first note 


but write on however and send me copies if thou canst of all that
passes between our charlotte and miss harlowe i'll take no notice of
what thou communicatest of that sort i like not the people here the
worse for their generous offer to the lady but you see she is as proud
as implacable there's no obliging her she'd rather sell her clothes
than be beholden to any body although she would oblige by permitting the
obligation 

o lord o lord mortal ill adieu jack 


 


i was forced to leave off i was so ill at this place and what dost
think why lord m brought the parson of the parish to pray by me for
his chaplain is at oxford i was lain down in my night-gown over my
waistcoat and in a doze and when i opened my eyes who should i see 
but the parson kneeling on one side the bed lord m on the other mrs 
greme who had been sent for to tend me as they call it at the feet 
god be thanked my lord said i in an ecstasy where's miss for i
supposed they were going to marry me 

they thought me delirious at first and prayed louder and louder 

this roused me off the bed i started slid my feet into my slippers 
put my hand in my waistcoat pocket and pulled out thy letter with my
beloved's meditation in it my lord dr wright mrs greme you have
thought me a very wicked fellow but see i can read you as good as you
can read me 

they stared at one another i gaped and read poor mo or tals the
cau o ause of their own their own mi ser ry 

it is as suitable to my case as to the lady's as thou'lt observe if
thou readest it again at the passage where it is said that when a man
is chastened for sin his beauty consumes away i stept to the glass a
poor figure by jupiter cried i and they all praised and admired me 
lifted up their hands and their eyes and the doctor said he always
thought it impossible that a man of my sense could be so wild as the
world said i was my lord chuckled for joy congratulated me and thank
my dear miss harlowe i got high reputation among good bad and
indifferent in short i have established myself for ever with all here 
 but o belford even this will not do i must leave off again 


 see vol vii letter lxxxi 


 


a visit from the montague sisters led in by the hobbling peer to
congratulate my amendment and reformation both in one what a lucky
event this illness with this meditation in my pocket for we were all to
pieces before thus when a boy have i joined with a crowd coming out
of church and have been thought to have been there myself 

i am incensed at the insolence of the young levite thou wilt highly
oblige me if thou'lt find him out and send me his ears in the next
letter 

my beloved mistakes me if she thinks i proposed her writing to me as an
alternative that should dispense with my attendance upon her that it
shall not do nor did i intend it should unless she pleased me better in
the contents of her letter than she has done bid her read again i
gave no such hopes i would have been with her in spite of you both by
to-morrow at farthest had i not been laid by the heels thus like a
helpless miscreant 

but i grow better and better every hour i say the doctor says not but
i am sure i know best and i will soon be in london depend on't but
say nothing of this to my dear cruel and implacable miss harlowe 

a dieu u ja aack what a gaping puppy yaw n yaw n yaw n 

thy
lovelace 



letter viii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
monday aug 15 


i am extremely concerned for thy illness i should be very sorry to lose
thee yet if thou diest so soon i could wish from my soul it had
been before the beginning of last april and this as well for thy sake 
as for the sake of the most excellent woman in the world for then thou
wouldst not have had the most crying sin of thy life to answer for 

i was told on saturday that thou wert very much out of order and this
made me forbear writing till i heard farther harry on his return from
thee confirmed the bad way thou art in but i hope lord m in his
unmerited tenderness for thee thinks the worst of thee what can it be 
bob a violent fever they say but attended with odd and severe
symptoms 

i will not trouble thee in the way thou art in with what passes here
with miss harlowe i wish thy repentance as swift as thy illness and as
efficacious if thou diest for it is else to be feared that she and you
will never meet in one place 

i told her how ill you are poor man said she dangerously ill say
you 

dangerously indeed madam so lord m sends me word 

god be merciful to him if he die said the admirable creature then 
after a pause poor wretch may he meet with the mercy he has not shown 

i send this by a special messenger for i am impatient to hear how it
goes with thee if i have received thy last letter what melancholy
reflections will that last so full of shocking levity give to

thy true friend 
john belford 



letter ix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday aug 15 


 text error should be aug 16 


thank thee jack most heartily i thank thee for the sober conclusion of
thy last i have a good mind for the sake of it to forgive thy till
now absolutely unpardonable extracts 

but dost think i will lose such an angel such a forgiving angel as
this by my soul i will not to pray for mercy for such an ungrateful
miscreant how she wounds me how she cuts me to the soul by her
exalted generosity but she must have mercy upon me first then will
she teach me a reliance for the sake of which her prayer for me will be
answered 

but hasten hasten to me particulars of her health of her employments 
of her conversation 

i am sick only of love oh that i could have called her mine it would
then have been worth while to be sick to have sent for her down to me
from town and to have had her with healing in her dove-like wings 
flying to my comfort her duty and her choice to pray for me and to bid
me live for her sake o jack what an angel have i 

but i have not lost her i will not lose her i am almost well should
be quite well but for these prescribing rascals who to do credit to
their skill will make the disease of importance and i will make her
mine and be sick again to entitle myself to her dutiful tenderness 
and pious as well as personal concern 

god for ever bless her hasten hasten particulars of her i am sick
of love such generous goodness by all that's great and good i will
not lose her so tell her she says that she could not pity me if she
thought of being mine this according to miss howe's transcriptions to
charlotte but bid her hate me and have me and my behaviour to her
shall soon turn that hate to love for body and mind i will be wholly
her's 



letter x

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
thursday aug 17 


i am sincerely rejoiced to hear that thou art already so much amended as
thy servant tells me thou art thy letter looks as if thy morals were
mending with thy health this was a letter i could show as i did to
the lady 

she is very ill cursed letters received from her implacable family so
i could not have much conversation with her in thy favour upon it but
what passed will make thee more and more adore her 

she was very attentive to me as i read it and when i had done poor
man said she what a letter is this he had timely instances that my
temper was not ungenerous if generosity could have obliged him but his
remorse and that for his own sake is all the punishment i wish him 
yet i must be more reserved if you write to him every thing i say 

i extolled her unbounded goodness how could i help it though to her
face 

no goodness in it she said it was a frame of mind she had endeavoured
after for her own sake she suffered too much in want of mercy not to
wish it to a penitent heart he seems to be penitent said she and it
is not for me to judge beyond appearances if he be not he deceives
himself more than any body else 

she was so ill that this was all that passed on the occasion 

what a fine subject for tragedy would the injuries of this lady and her
behaviour under them both with regard to her implacable friends and to
her persecutor make with a grand objection as to the moral 
nevertheless for here virtue is punished except indeed we look
forward to the rewards of hereafter which morally she must be sure of 
or who can yet after all i know not so sad a fellow art thou and so
vile an husband mightest thou have made whether her virtue is not
rewarded in missing thee for things the most grievous to human nature 
when they happen as this charming creature once observed are often the
happiest for us in the event 


 mr belford's objections that virtue ought not to suffer in a tragedy 
is not well considered monimia in the orphean belvidera in venice
preserved athenais in theodosius cordelia in shakespeare's king lear 
desdemona in othello hamlet to name no more are instances that a
tragedy could hardly be justly called a tragedy if virtue did not
temporarily suffer and vice for a while triumph but he recovers
himself in the same paragraph and leads us to look up to the future for
the reward of virtue and for the punishment of guilt and observes not
amiss when he says he knows not but that the virtue of such a woman as
clarissa is rewarded in missing such a man as lovelace 


i have frequently thought in my attendance on this lady that if
belton's admired author nic rowe had had such a character before him 
he would have drawn another sort of penitent than he has done or given
his play which he calls the fair penitent a fitter title miss harlowe
is a penitent indeed i think if i am not guilty of a contradiction in
terms a penitent without a fault her parents' conduct towards her from
the first considered 

the whole story of the other is a pack of d d stuff lothario tis
true seems such another wicked ungenerous varlet as thou knowest who 
the author knew how to draw a rake but not to paint a penitent calista
is a desiring luscious wench and her penitence is nothing else but rage 
insolence and scorn her passions are all storm and tumult nothing of
the finer passions of the sex which if naturally drawn will
distinguish themselves from the masculine passions by a softness that
will even shine through rage and despair her character is made up of
deceit and disguise she has no virtue is all pride and her devil is
as much within her as without her 

how then can the fall of such a one create a proper distress when all
the circumstances of it are considered for does she not brazen out her
crime even after detection knowing her own guilt she calls for
altamont's vengeance on his best friend as if he had traduced her 
yields to marry altamont though criminal with another and actually beds
that whining puppy when she had given up herself body and soul to
lothario who nevertheless refused to marry her 

her penitence when begun she justly styles the phrensy of her soul 
and as i said after having as long as she could most audaciously
brazened out her crime and done all the mischief she could do 
 occasioning the death of lothario of her father and others she stabs
herself 

and can this be the act of penitence 

but indeed our poets hardly know how to create a distress without
horror murder and suicide and must shock your soul to bring tears
from your eyes 

altamont indeed who is an amorous blockhead a credulous cuckold and 
 though painted as a brave fellow and a soldier a mere tom essence 
and a quarreler with his best friend dies like a fool as we are led to
suppose at the conclusion of the play without either sword or pop-gun 
of mere grief and nonsense for one of the vilest of her sex but the fair
penitent as she is called perishes by her own hand and having no
title by her past crimes to laudable pity forfeits all claim to true
penitence and in all probability to future mercy 

but here is miss clarissa harlowe a virtuous noble wise and pious
young lady who being ill used by her friends and unhappily ensnared by
a vile libertine whom she believes to be a man of honour is in a manner
forced to throw herself upon his protection and he in order to obtain
her confidence never scruples the deepest and most solemn protestations
of honour 

after a series of plots and contrivances al baffled by her virtue and
vigilance he basely has recourse to the vilest of arts and to rob her
of her honour is forced first to rob her of her senses 

unable to bring her notwithstanding to his ungenerous views of
cohabitation she over-awes him in the very entrance of a fresh act of
premeditated guilt in presence of the most abandoned of women assembled
to assist his devilish purpose triumphs over them all by virtue only of
her innocence and escapes from the vile hands he had put her into 

she nobly not franticly resents refuses to see or to marry the wretch 
who repenting his usage of so divine a creature would fain move her to
forgive his baseness and make him her husband and this though
persecuted by all her friends and abandoned to the deepest distress 
being obliged from ample fortunes to make away with her apparel for
subsistence surrounded also by strangers and forced in want of others 
to make a friend of the friend of her seducer 

though longing for death and making all proper preparations for it 
convinced that grief and ill usage have broken her noble heart she
abhors the impious thought of shortening her allotted period and as
much a stranger to revenge as despair is able to forgive the author of
her ruin wishes his repentance and that she may be the last victim to
his barbarous perfidy and is solicitous for nothing so much in this
life as to prevent vindictive mischief to and from the man who used her
so basely 

this is penitence this is piety and hence distress naturally arises 
that must worthily effect every heart 

whatever the ill usage of this excellent woman is from her relations she
breaks not out into excesses she strives on the contrary to find
reason to justify them at her own expense and seems more concerned for
their cruelty to her for their sakes hereafter when she shall be no
more than for her own for as to herself she is sure she says god
will forgive her though no one on earth will 

on every extraordinary provocation she has recourse to the scriptures 
and endeavours to regulate her vehemence by sacred precedents better
people she says have been more afflicted than she grievous as she
sometimes thinks her afflictions and shall she not bear what less faulty
persons have borne  on the very occasion i have mentioned some new
instances of implacableness from her friends the enclosed meditation
will show how mildly and yet how forcibly she complains see if thou 
in the wicked levity of thy heart canst apply it to thy cause as thou
didst the other if thou canst not give way to thy conscience and that
will make the properest application 


meditation

how long will ye vex my soul and break me in pieces with words 

be it indeed that i have erred mine error remaineth with myself 

to her that is afflicted pity should be shown from her friend 

but she that is ready to slip with her feet is as a lamp despised in the
thought of them that are at ease 

there is a shame which bringeth sin and there is a shame which bringeth
glory and grace 

have pity upon me have pity upon me o ye my friends for the hand of
god hath touched me 

if your soul were in my soul's stead i also could speak as ye do i
could heap up words against you 

but i would strengthen you with my mouth and the moving of my lips
should assuage your grief 

why will ye break a leaf driven to and fro why will ye pursue the dry
stubble why will ye write bitter words against me and make me possess
the iniquities of my youth 

mercy is seasonable in the time of affliction as clouds of rain in the
time of drought 

are not my days few cease then and let me alone that i may take
comfort a little before i go whence i shall not return even to the land
of darkness and shadow of death 


let me add that the excellent lady is informed by a letter from mrs 
norton that colonel morden is just arrived in england he is now the
only person she wishes to see 

i expressed some jealousy upon it lest he should have place given over
me in the executorship she said that she had no thoughts to do so now 
because such a trust were he to accept of it which she doubted 
might from the nature of some of the papers which in that case would
necessarily pass through his hands occasion mischiefs between my friend
and him that would be worse than death for her to think of 

poor belton i hear is at death's door a messenger is just come from
him who tells me he cannot die till he sees me i hope the poor fellow
will not go off yet since neither his affairs of this world nor for the
other are in tolerable order i cannot avoid going to the poor man 
yet am unwilling to stir till i have an assurance from you that you will
not disturb the lady for i know he will be very loth to part with me 
when he gets me to him 

tourville tells me how fast thou mendest let me conjure thee not to
think of molesting this incomparable woman for thy own sake i request
this as well as for her's and for the sake of thy given promise for 
should she die within a few weeks as i fear she will it will be said 
and perhaps too justly that thy visit has hastened her end 

in hopes thou wilt not i wish thy perfect recovery else that thou
mayest relapse and be confined to thy bed 



letter xi

mr belford to miss clarissa harlowe
sat morn aug 19 


madam 

i think myself obliged in honour to acquaint you that i am afraid mr 
lovelace will try his fate by an interview with you 

i wish to heaven you could prevail upon yourself to receive his visit 
all that is respectful even to veneration and all that is penitent 
will you see in his behaviour if you can admit of it but as i am
obliged to set out directly for epsom to perform as i apprehend the
last friendly offices for poor mr belton whom once you saw and as i
think it more likely that mr lovelace will not be prevailed upon than
that he will i thought fit to give you this intimation lest if he
should come you should be too much surprised 

he flatters himself that you are not so ill as i represent you to be 
when he sees you he will be convinced that the most obliging things he
can do will be as proper to be done for the sake of his own future peace
of mind as for your health-sake and i dare say in fear of hurting the
latter he will forbear the thoughts of any farther intrusion at least
while you are so much indisposed so that one half-hour's shock if it
will be a shock to see the unhappy man but just got up himself from a
dangerous fever will be all you will have occasion to stand 

i beg you will not too much hurry and discompose yourself it is
impossible he can be in town till monday at soonest and if he resolve
to come i hope to be at mr smith's before him 

i am madam with the profoundest veneration 

your most faithful and most obedient servant 
j belford 



letter xii
mr lovelace to john belford esq 
 in answer to his of aug 17 see letter x of this volume  
sunday aug 20 


what an unmerciful fellow art thou a man has no need of a conscience 
who has such an impertinent monitor but if nic rowe wrote a play that
answers not his title am i to be reflected upon for that i have
sinned i repent i would repair she forgives my sin she accepts my
repentance but she won't let me repair what wouldst thou have me do 

but get thee gone to belton as soon as thou canst yet whether thou
goest or not up i must go and see what i can do with the sweet oddity
myself the moment these prescribing varlets will let me depend
upon it i go nay lord m thinks she ought to permit me one interview 
his opinion has great authority with me when it squares with my own and
i have assured him and my two cousins that i will behave with all the
decency and respect that man can behave with to the person whom he most
respects and so i will of this if thou choosest not to go to belton
mean time thou shalt be witness 

colonel morden thou hast heard me say is a man of honour and bravery 
but colonel morden has had his girls as well as you or i and indeed 
either openly or secretly who has not the devil always baits with a
pretty wench when he angles for a man be his age rank or degree what
it will 

i have often heard my beloved speak of the colonel with great distinction
and esteem i wish he could make matters a little easier for her mind's
sake between the rest of the implacables and herself 

methinks i am sorry for honest belton but a man cannot be ill or
vapourish but thou liftest up thy shriek-owl note and killest him
immediately none but a fellow who is for a drummer in death's
forlorn-hope could take so much delight as thou dost in beating a
dead-march with thy goose-quills whereas didst thou but know thine own
talents thou art formed to give mirth by thy very appearance and
wouldst make a better figure by half leading up thy brother-bears at
hockley in the hole to the music of a scot's bagpipe methinks i see
thy clumsy sides shaking and shaking the sides of all beholders in
these attitudes thy fat head archly beating time on thy porterly
shoulders right and left by turns as i once beheld thee practising to
the horn-pipe at preston thou remembrest the frolick as i have done
an hundred times for i never before saw thee appear so much in
character 

but i know what i shall get by this only that notable observation
repeated that thy outside is the worst of thee and mine the best of me 
and so let it be nothing thou writest of this sort can i take amiss 

but i shall call thee seriously to account when i see thee for the
extracts thou hast given the lady from my letters notwithstanding what i
said in my last especially if she continue to refuse me an hundred
times have i myself known a woman deny yet comply at last but by these
extracts thou hast i doubt made her bar up the door of her heart as
she used to do her chamber-door against me this therefore is a
disloyalty that friendship cannot bear nor honour allow me to forgive 



letter xiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
london aug 21 monday 


i believe i am bound to curse thee jack nevertheless i won't
anticipate but proceed to write thee a longer letter than thou hast had
from me for some time past so here goes 

that thou mightest have as little notice as possible of the time i was
resolved to be in town i set out in my lord's chariot-and-six yesterday 
as soon as i had dispatched my letter to thee and arrived in town last
night for i knew i could have no dependence on thy friendship where miss
harlowe's humour was concerned 

i had no other place so ready and so was forced to go to my old
lodgings where also my wardrobe is and there i poured out millions of
curses upon the whole crew and refused to see either sally or polly and
this not only for suffering the lady to escape but for the villanous
arrest and for their detestable insolence to her at the officer's house 

i dressed myself in a never-worn suit which i had intended for one of my
wedding-suits and liked myself so well that i began to think with
thee that my outside was the best of me 

i took a chair to smith's my heart bounding in almost audible thumps to
my throat with the assured expectations of seeing my beloved i clasped
my fingers as i was danced along i charged my eyes to languish and
sparkle by turns i talked to my knees telling them how they must bend 
and in the language of a charming describer acted my part in fancy as
well as spoke it to myself 

 tenderly kneeling thus will i complain 
 thus court her pity and thus plead my pain 
 thus sigh for fancy'd frowns if frowns should rise 
 and thus meet favour in her soft'ning eyes 

in this manner entertained i myself till i arrived at smith's and there
the fellows set down their gay burden off went their hats will ready
at hand in a new livery up went the head out rushed my honour the
woman behind the counter all in flutters respect and fear giving due
solemnity to her features and her knees i doubt not knocking against
the inside of her wainscot-fence 

your servant madam will let the fellows move to some distance and
wait 

you have a young lady lodges here miss harlowe madam is she above 

sir sir and please your honour  the woman is struck with my figure 
thought i   miss harlowe sir there is indeed such a young lady
lodges here but but 

but what madam i must see her one pair of stairs is it not 
don't trouble yourself i shall find her apartment and was making
towards the stairs 

sir sir the lady the lady is not at home she is abroad she is in the
country 

in the country not at home impossible you will not pass this story
upon me good woman i must see her i have business of life and death
with her 

indeed sir the lady is not at home indeed sir she is abroad 

she then rung a bell john cried she pray step down indeed sir the
lady is not at home 

down came john the good man of the house when i expected one of his
journeymen by her saucy familiarity 

my dear said she the gentleman will not believe miss harlowe is abroad 

john bowed to my fine clothes your servant sir indeed the lady is
abroad she went out of town this morning by six o'clock into the
country by the doctor's advice 

still i would not believe either john or his wife i am sure said i 
she cannot be abroad i heard she was very ill she is not able to go
out in a coach do you know mr belford friend 

yes sir i have the honour to know squire belford he is gone into the
country to visit a sick friend he went on saturday sir 

this had also been told from thy lodgings to will whom i sent to desire
to see thee on my first coming to town 

well and mr belford wrote me word that she was exceeding ill how then
can she be gone out 

o sir she is very ill very ill indeed she could hardly walk to the
coach 

belford thought i himself knew nothing of the time of my coming 
neither can he have received my letter of yesterday and so ill tis
impossible she would go out 

where is her servant call her servant to me 

her servant sir is her nurse she has no other and she is gone with
her 

well friend i must not believe you you'll excuse me but i must go up
stairs myself and was stepping up 

john hereupon put on a serious and a less respectful face sir this
house is mine and 

and what friend not doubting then but she was above i must and will
see her i have authority for it i am a justice of the peace i have
a search warrant 

and up i went they following me muttering and in a plaguy flutter 

the first door i came to was locked i tapped at it 

the lady sir has the key of her own apartment 

on the inside i question not my honest friend tapping again and
being assured if she heard my voice that her timorous and soft temper
would make her betray herself by some flutters to my listning ear i
said aloud i am confident miss harlowe is here dearest madam open the
door admit me but for one moment to your presence 

but neither answer nor fluttering saluted my ear and the people being
very quiet i led on to the next apartment and the key being on the
outside i opened it and looked all around it and into the closet 

the mans said he never saw so uncivil a gentleman in his life 

hark thee friend said i let me advise thee to be a little decent or
i shall teach thee a lesson thou never learnedst in all thy life 

sir said he tis not like a gentleman to affront a man in his own
house 

then prythee man replied i don't crow upon thine own dunghil 

i stept back to the locked door my dear miss harlowe i beg of you to
open the door or i'll break it open pushing hard against it that it
cracked again 

the man looked pale and trembling with his fright made a plaguy long
face and called to one of his bodice-makers above joseph come down
quickly 

joseph came down a lion's-face grinning fellow thick and short and
bushy-headed like an old oak-pollard then did master john put on a
sturdier look but i only hummed a tune traversed all the other
apartments sounded the passages with my knuckles to find whether there
were private doors and walked up the next pair of stairs singing all
the way john and joseph and mrs smith following me up trembling 

i looked round me there and went into two open-door bed-chambers 
searched the closets and the passages and peeped through the key-hole
of another no miss harlowe by jupiter what shall i do what shall i
do as the girls say now will she be grieved that she is out of the
way 

i said this on purpose to find out whether these people knew the lady's
story and had the answer i expected from mrs smith i believe not sir 

why so mrs smith do you know who i am 

i can guess sir 

whom do you guess me to be 

your name is mr lovelace sir i make no doubt 

the very same but how came you to guess so well dame smith you never
saw me before did you 

here jack i laid out for a compliment and missed it 

tis easy to guess sir for there cannot be two such gentlemen as you 

well said dame smith but mean you good or bad handsome was the least
i thought she would have said 

i leave you to guess sir 

condemned thought i by myself on this appeal 

why father smith thy wife is a wit man didst thou ever find that out
before but where is widow lovick dame smith my cousin john belford
says she is a very good woman is she within or is she gone with miss
harlowe too 

she will be within by-and-by sir she is not with the lady 

well but my good dear mrs smith where is the lady gone and when will
she return 

i can't tell sir 

don't tell fibs dame smith don't tell fibs chucking her under the
chin which made john's upper-lip with chin shortened rise to his nose 
 i am sure you know but here's another pair of stairs let us see who
lives up there but hold here's another room locked up tapping at the
door who's at home cried i 

that's mrs lovick's apartment she is gone out and has the key with
her 

widow lovick rapping again i believe you are at home pray open the
door 

john and joseph muttered and whispered together 

no whispering honest friends tis not manners to whisper joseph what
said john to thee 

john sir disdainfully repeated the good woman 

i beg pardon mrs smith but you see the force of example had you
showed your honest man more respect i should let me give you a piece
of advice women who treat their husbands irreverently teach strangers
to use them with contempt there honest master john why dost not pull
off thy hat to me oh so thou wouldst if thou hadst it on but thou
never wearest thy hat in thy wife's presence i believe dost thou 

none of your fleers and your jeers sir cried john i wish every
married pair lived as happily as we do 

i wish so too honest friend but i'll be hanged if thou hast any
children 

why so sir 

hast thou answer me man hast thou or not 

perhaps not sir but what of that 

what of that why i'll tell thee the man who has no children by his
wife must put up with plain john hadst thou a child or two thou'dst be
called mr smith with a courtesy or a smile at least at every word 

you are very pleasant sir replied my dame i fancy if either my
husband or i had as much to answer for as i know whom we should not be
so merry 

why then dame smith so much the worse for those who were obliged to
keep you company but i am not merry i am sad hey-ho where shall i
find my dear miss harlowe 

my beloved miss harlowe  calling at the foot of the third pair of
stairs   if you are above for heaven's sake answer me i am coming up 

sir said the good man i wish you'd walk down the servants' rooms and
the working-rooms are up those stairs and another pair and nobody's
there that you want 

shall i go up and see if miss harlowe be there mrs smith 

you may sir if you please 

then i won't for if she was you would not be so obliging 

i am ashamed to give you all this attendance you are the politest
traders i ever knew honest joseph slapping him upon the shoulders on
a sudden which made him jump didst ever grin for a wager man for the
rascal seemed not displeased with me and cracking his flat face from
ear to ear with a distended mouth showed his teeth as broad and as
black as his thumb-nails but don't i hinder thee what canst earn
a-day man 

half-a-crown i can earn a-day with an air of pride and petulance at
being startled 

there then is a day's wages for thee but thou needest not attend me
farther 

come mrs smith come john master smith i should say let's walk
down and give me an account where the lady is gone and when she will
return 

so down stairs led i john and joseph thought i had discharged the
latter and my dame following me to show their complaisance to a
stranger 

i re-entered one of the first-floor rooms i have a great mind to be
your lodger for i never saw such obliging folks in my life what rooms
have you to let 

none at all sir 

i am sorry for that but whose is this 

mine sir chuffily said john 

thine man why then i will take it of thee this and a bed-chamber 
and a garret for one servant will content me i will give thee thine
own price and half a guinea a day over for those conveniencies 

for ten guineas a day sir 

hold john master smith i should say before thou speakest consider 
i won't be affronted man 

sir i wish you'd walk down said the good woman really sir you
take 

great liberties i hope you would not say mrs smith 

indeed sir i was going to say something like it 

well then i am glad i prevented you for such words better become my
mouth than yours but i must lodge with you till the lady returns i
believe i must however you may be wanted in the shop so we'll talk
that over there 

down i went they paying diligent attendance on my steps 

when i came into the shop seeing no chair or stool i went behind the
compter and sat down under an arched kind of canopy of carved work 
which these proud traders emulating the royal niche-fillers often give
themselves while a joint-stool perhaps serves those by whom they get
their bread such is the dignity of trade in this mercantile nation 

i looked about me and above me and told them i was very proud of my
seat asking if john were ever permitted to fill this superb niche 

perhaps he was he said very surlily 

that is it that makes thee looks so like a statue man 

john looked plaguy glum upon me but his man joseph and my man will 
turned round with their backs to us to hide their grinning with each
his fist in his mouth 

i asked what it was they sold 

powder and wash-balls and snuff they said and gloves and stockings 

o come i'll be your customer will do i want wash-balls 

yes and please your honour you can dispense with one or two 

give him half a dozen dame smith 

she told me she must come where i was to serve them pray sir walk
from behind the compter 

indeed but i won't the shop shall be mine where are they if a
customer shall come in 

she pointed over my head with a purse mouth as if she would not have
simpered could she have helped it i reached down the glass and gave
will six there put em up sirrah 

he did grinning with his teeth out before which touching my conscience 
as the loss of them was owing to me joseph said i come hither come
hither man when i bid thee 

he stalked towards me his hands behind him half willing and half
unwilling 

i suddenly wrapt my arm round his neck will thy penknife this moment 
d n the fellow where's thy penknife 

o lord said the pollard-headed dog struggling to get his head loose
from under my arm while my other hand was muzzling about his cursed
chaps as if i would take his teeth out 

i will pay thee a good price man don't struggle thus the penknife 
will 

o lord cried joseph struggling still more and more and out comes
will s pruning-knife for the rascal is a gardener in the country i
have only this sir 

the best in the world to launch a gum d n the fellow why dost
struggle thus 

master and mistress smith being afraid i suppose that i had a design
upon joseph's throat because he was their champion and this indeed 
made me take the more notice of him coming towards me with countenances
tragic-comical i let him go 

i only wanted said i to take out two or three of this rascal's broad
teeth to put them into my servant's jaws and i would have paid him his
price for them i would by my soul joseph 

joseph shook his ears and with both hands stroked down smooth as it
would lie his bushy hair and looked at me as if he knew not whether he
should laugh or be angry but after a stupid stare or two stalked off
to the other end of the shop nodding his head at me as he went still
stroking down his hair and took his stand by his master facing about
and muttering that i was plaguy strong in the arms and he thought would
have throttled him then folding his arms and shaking his bristled
head added twas well i was a gentleman or he would not have taken
such an affront 

i demanded where their rappee was the good woman pointed to the place 
and i took up a scollop-shell of it refusing to let her weight it and
filled my box and now mrs smith said i where are your gloves 

she showed me and i chose four pair of them and set joseph who looked
as if he wanted to be taken notice of again to open the fingers 

a female customer who had been gaping at the door came in for some
scots sniff and i would serve her the wench was plaguy homely and i
told her so or else i said i would have treated her she in anger 
 no woman is homely in her own opinion   threw down her penny and i put
it in my pocket 

just then turning my eye to the door i saw a pretty genteel lady with
a footman after her peeping in with a what's the matter good folks to
the starers and i ran to her from behind the compter and as she was
making off took her hand and drew her into the shop begging that she
would be my customer for that i had but just begun trade 

what do you sell sir said she smiling but a little surprised 

tapes ribbands silk laces pins and needles for i am a pedlar 
powder patches wash-balls stockings garters snuffs and pin
cushions don't we goody smith 

so in i gently drew her to the compter running behind it myself with an
air of great dilingence and obligingness i have excellent gloves and
wash-balls madam rappee scots portugal and all sorts of snuff 

well said she in a very good humour i'll encourage a young beginner
for once here andrew  to her footman   you want a pair of gloves 
don't you 

i took down a parcel of gloves which mrs smith pointed to and came
round to the fellow to fit them on myself 

no matter for opening them said i thy fingers friend are as stiff as
drum-sticks push thou'rt an awkward dog i wonder such a pretty lady
will be followed by such a clumsy varlet 

the fellow had no strength for laughing and joseph was mightily pleased 
in hopes i suppose i would borrow a few of andrew's teeth to keep him
in countenance and father and mother smith like all the world as the
jest was turned from themselves seemed diverted with the humour 

the fellow said the gloves were too little 

thrust and be d d to thee said i why fellow thou hast not the
strength of a cat 

sir sir said he laughing i shall hurt your honour's side 

d n thee thrust i say 

he did and burst out the sides of the glove 

will said i where's thy pruning-knife by my soul friend i had a
good mind to pare thy cursed paws but come here's a larger pair try
them when thou gettest home and let thy sweetheart if thou hast one 
mend the other so take both 

the lady laughed at the humour as did my fellow and mrs smith and
joseph even john laughed though he seemed by the force put upon his
countenance to be but half pleased with me neither 

madam said i and stepped behind the compter bowing over it now i hope
you will buy something for yourself nobody shall use you better nor
sell you cheaper 

come said she give me six-penny worth of portugal snuff 

they showed me where it was and i served her and said when she would
have paid me i took nothing at my opening 

if i treated her footman she told me i should not treat her 

well with all my heart said i tis not for us tradesmen to be saucy 
is it mrs smith 

i put her sixpence in my pocket and seizing her hand took notice to
her of the crowd that had gathered about the door and besought her to
walk into the back-shop with me 

she struggled her hand out of mine and would stay no longer 

so i bowed and bid her kindly welcome and thanked her and hoped i
should have her custom another time 

she went away smiling and andrew after her who made me a fine bow 

i began to be out of countenance at the crowd which thickened apace and
bid will order the chair to the door 

well mrs smith with a grave air i am heartily sorry miss harlowe is
abroad you don't tell me where she is 

indeed sir i cannot 

you will not you mean she could have no notion of my coming i came
to town but last night i have been very ill she has almost broken my
heart by her cruelty you know my story i doubt not tell her i must
go out of town to-morrow morning but i will send my servant to know if
she will favour me with one half-hour's conversation for as soon as i
get down i shall set out for dover in my way to france if i have not a
countermand from her who has the sole disposal of my fate 

and so flinging down a portugal six-and-thirty i took mr smith by the
hand telling him i was sorry we had not more time to be better
acquainted and bidding farewell to honest joseph who pursed up his
mouth as i passed by him as if he thought his teeth still in jeopardy 
and mrs smith adieu and to recommend me to her fair lodger hummed an
air and the chair being come whipt into it the people about the door
seeming to be in good humour with me one crying a pleasant gentleman i
warrant him and away i was carried to white's according to direction 

as soon as i came thither i ordered will to go and change his clothes 
and to disguise himself by putting on his black wig and keeping his
mouth shut and then to dodge about smith's to inform himself of the
lady's motions 


 


i give thee this impudent account of myself that thou mayest rave at me 
and call me hardened and what thou wilt for in the first place i 
who had been so lately ill was glad i was alive and then i was so
balked by my charmer's unexpected absence and so ruffled by that and by
the bluff treatment of father john that i had no other way to avoid
being out of humour with all i met with moreover i was rejoiced to
find by the lady's absence and by her going out at six in the morning 
that it was impossible she should be so ill as thou representest her to
be and this gave me still higher spirits then i know the sex always
love cheerful and humourous fellows the dear creature herself used to
be pleased with my gay temper and lively manner and had she been told
that i was blubbering for her in the back-shop she would have despised
me still more than she does 

furthermore i was sensible that the people of the house must needs have
a terrible notion of me as a savage bloody-minded obdurate fellow a
perfect woman-eater and no doubt expected to see me with the claws of
a lion and the fangs of a tiger and it was but policy to show them what
a harmless pleasant fellow i am in order to familiarize the johns and
the josephs to me for it was evident to me by the good woman's calling
them down that she thought me a dangerous man whereas now john and i
have shaken hands together and dame smith having seen that i have the
face and hands and looks of a man and walk upright and prate and
laugh and joke like other people and joseph that i can talk of taking
his teeth out of his head without doing him the least hurt they will
all at my next visit be much more easy and pleasant to me than andrew's
gloves were to him and we shall be as thoroughly acquainted as if we
had known one another a twelvemonth 

when i returned to our mother's i again cursed her and all her nymphs
together and still refused to see either sally or polly i raved at the
horrid arrest and told the old dragon that it was owing to her and her's
that the fairest virtue in the world was ruined my reputation for ever
blasted and that i was not married and perfectly happy in the love of
the most excellent of her sex 

she to pacify me said she would show me a new face that would please
me since i would not see my sally who was dying with grief 

where is this new face cried i let me see her though i shall never see
any face with pleasure but miss harlowe's 

she won't come down replied she she will not be at the word of command
yet she is but just in the trammels and must be waited upon i'll
assure you and courted much besides 

ay said i that looks well lead me to her this instant 

i followed her up and who should she be but that little toad sally 

o curse you said i for a devil is it you is your's the new face 

o my dear dear mr lovelace cried she i am glad any thing will bring
you to me and so the little beast threw herself about my neck and
there clung like a cat come said she what will you give me and i'll
be as virtuous for a quarter of an hour and mimic your clarissa to the
life 

i was belforded all over i could not bear such an insult upon the dear
creature for i have a soft and generous nature in the main whatever
thou thinkest and cursed her most devoutly for taking my beloved's
name in her mouth in such a way but the little devil was not to be
balked but fell a crying sobbing praying begging exclaiming 
fainting that i never saw my lovely girl so well aped indeed i was
almost taken in for i could have fancied i had her before me once more 

o this sex this artful sex there's no minding them at first indeed 
their grief and their concern may be real but give way to the
hurricane and it will soon die away in soft murmurs thrilling upon your
ears like the notes of a well-tuned viol and by sally one sees that
art will generally so well supply the place of nature that you shall not
easily know the difference miss clarisa harlowe indeed is the only
woman in the world i believe that can say in the words of her favourite
job for i can quote a text as well as she but it is not so with me 

they were very inquisitive about my fair-one they told me that you
seldom came near them that when you did you put on plaguy grave airs 
would hardly stay five minutes and did nothing but praise miss harlowe 
and lament her hard fate in short that you despised them was full of
sentences and they doubted not in a little while would be a lost man 
and marry 

a pretty character for thee is it not thou art in a blessed way yet
hast nothing to do but to go on in it and then what work hast thou to go
through if thou turnest back these sorceresses will be like the czar's
cossacks  at pultowa i think it was   who were planted with ready
primed and cocked pieces behind the regulars in order to shoot them
dead if they did not push on and conquer and then wilt thou be most
lamentably despised by every harlot thou hast made and o jack how
formidable in that case will be the number of thy enemies 

i intend to regulate my motions by will s intelligence for see this
dear creature i must and will yet i have promised lord m to be down in
two or three days at farthest for he is grown plaguy fond of me since i
was ill 

i am in hopes that the word i left that i am to go out of town to-morrow
morning will soon bring the lady back again 

mean time i thought i would write to divert thee while thou art of such
importance about the dying and as thy servant it seems comes backward
and forward every day perhaps i may send thee another letter to-morrow 
with the particulars of the interview between the dear creature and me 
after which my soul thirsteth 



letter xiv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday aug 22 


i must write on to divert myself for i can get no rest no refreshing
rest i awaked just now in a cursed fright how a man may be affected
by dreams 

methought i had an interview with my beloved i found her all goodness 
condescension and forgiveness she suffered herself to be overcome in
my favour by the joint intercessions of lord m lady sarah lady betty 
and my two cousins montague who waited upon her in deep mourning the
ladies in long trains sweeping after them lord m in a long black mantle
trailing after him they told her they came in these robs to express
their sorrow for my sins against her and to implore her to forgive me 

i myself i thought was upon my knees with a sword in my hand 
offering either to put it up in the scabbard or to thrust it into my
heart as she should command the one or the other 

at that moment her cousin morden i thought all of a sudden flashed in
through a window with his drawn sword die lovelace said he this
instant die and be d d if in earnest thou repairest not by marriage
my cousin's wrongs 

i was rising to resent this insult i thought when lord m ran between
us with his great black mantle and threw it over my face and instantly
my charmer with that sweet voice which has so often played upon my
ravished ears wrapped her arms around me muffled as i was in my lord's
mantle o spare spare my lovelace and spare o lovelace my beloved
cousin morden let me not have my distresses augmented by the fall of
either or both of those who are so dear to me 

at this charmed with her sweet mediation i thought i would have
clasped her in my arms when immediately the most angelic form i had ever
beheld all clad in transparent white descended in a cloud which 
opening discovered a firmament above it crowded with golden cherubs and
glittering seraphs all addressing her with welcome welcome welcome 
and encircling my charmer ascended with her to the region of seraphims 
and instantly the opened cloud closing i lost sight of her and of the
bright form together and found wrapt in my arms her azure robe all
stuck thick with stars of embossed silver which i had caught hold of in
hopes of detaining her but was all that was left me of my beloved
clarissa and then horrid to relate the floor sinking under me as
the firmament had opened for her i dropt into a hole more frightful than
that of elden and tumbling over and over down it without view of a
bottom i awaked in a panic and was as effectually disordered for half
an hour as if my dream had been a reality 

wilt thou forgive my troubling thee with such visionary stuff thou wilt
see by it only that sleeping or waking my clarissa is always present
with me 

but here this moment is will come running hither to tell me that his
lady actually returned to her lodgings last night between eleven and
twelve and is now there though very ill 

i hasten to her but that i may not add to her indisposition by any
rough or boisterous behaviour i will be as soft and gentle as the dove
herself in my addresses to her 

 that i do love her i all ye host of heaven 
 be witness that she is dear to me 
 dearer than day to one whom sight must leave 
 dearer than life to one who fears to die 

the chair is come i fly to my beloved 



letter xv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


curse upon my stars disappointed again it was about eight when i
arrived at smith's the woman was in the shop 

so old acquaintance how do you now i know my love is above let her
be acquainted that i am here waiting for admission to her presence and
can take no denial tell her that i will approach her with the most
respectful duty and in whose company she pleases and i will not touch
the hem of her garment without her leave 

indeed sir you are mistaken the lady is not in this house nor near
it 

i'll see that will beckoning him to me and whispering see if thou
canst any way find out without losing sight of the door lest she should
be below stairs if she be in the neighbourhood if not within 

will bowed and went off up went i without further ceremony attended
now only by the good woman 

i went into each apartment except that which was locked before and was
now also locked and i called to my clarissa in the voice of love but 
by the still silence was convinced she was not there yet on the
strength of my intelligence i doubted not but she was in the house 

i then went up two pairs of stairs and looked round the first room but
no miss harlowe 

and who pray is in this room stopping at the door of another 

a widow gentlewoman sir mrs lovick 

o my dear mrs lovick said i i am intimately acquainted with mrs 
lovick's character from my cousin john belford i must see mrs lovick
by all means good mrs lovick open the door 

she did 

your servant madam be so good as to excuse me you have heard my
story you are an admirer of the most excellent woman in the world 
dear mrs lovick tell me what is become of her 

the poor lady sir went out yesterday on purpose to avoid you 

how so she knew not that i would be here 

she was afraid you would come when she heard you were recovered from
your illness ah sir what pity it is that so fine a gentleman should
make such ill returns for god's goodness to him 

you are an excellent woman mrs lovick i know that by my cousin john
belford's account of you and miss clarissa harlowe is an angel 

miss harlowe is indeed an angel replied she and soon will be company
for angels 

no jesting with such a woman as this jack 

tell me of a truth good mrs lovick where i may see this dear lady 
upon my soul i will neither fright for offend her i will only beg of
her to hear me speak for one half-quarter of an hour and if she will
have it so i will never trouble her more 

sir said the widow it would be death for her to see you she was at
home last night i'll tell you truth but fitter to be in bed all day 
she came home she said to die and if she could not avoid your visit 
she was unable to fly from you and believed she should die in your
presence 

and yet go out again this morning early how can that be widow 

why sir she rested not two hours for fear of you her fear gave her
strength which she'll suffer for when that fear is over and finding
herself the more she thought of your visit the less able to stay to
receive it she took chair and is gone nobody knows whither but i
believe she intended to be carried to the waterside in order to take
boat for she cannot bear a coach it extremely incommoded her
yesterday 

but before we talk any further said i if she be gone abroad you can
have no objection to my looking into every apartment above and below 
because i am told she is actually in the house 

indeed sir she is not you may satisfy yourself if you please but
mrs smith and i waited on her to her chair we were forced to support
her she was so weak she said whither can i go mrs lovick whither
can i go mrs smith cruel cruel man tell him i called him so if he
come again god give him that peace which he denies me 

sweet creature cried i and looked down and took out my handkerchief 

the widow wept i wish said she i had never known so excellent a lady 
and so great a sufferer i love her as my own child 

mrs smith wept 

i then gave over the hope of seeing her for this time i was extremely
chagrined at my disappointment and at the account they gave of her ill
health 

would to heaven said i she would put it in my power to repair her
wrongs i have been an ungrateful wretch to her i need not tell you 
mrs lovick how much i have injured her nor how much she suffers by her
relations' implacableness mrs smith that cuts her to the heart her
family is the most implacable family on earth and the dear creature in
refusing to see me and to be reconciled to me shows her relation to
them a little too plainly 

o sir said the widow not one syllable of what you say belongs to this
lady i never saw so sweet a temper she is always accusing herself and
excusing her relations and as to you sir she forgives you she
wishes you well and happier than you will let her die in peace tis all
she wishes for you don't look like a hard-hearted gentleman how can
you thus hunt and persecute a poor lady whom none of her relations will
look upon it makes my heart bleed for her 

and then she wept again mrs smith wept also my seat grew uneasy to
me i shifted to another several times and what mrs lovick farther
said and showed me made me still more uneasy 

bad as the poor lady was last night said she she transcribed into her
book a meditation on your persecuting her thus i have a copy of it if
i thought it would have any effect i would read it to you 

let me read it myself mrs lovick 

she gave it to me it has an harlowe-spirited title and from a
forgiving spirit intolerable i desired to take it with me she
consented on condition that i showed it to squire belford so here 
mr squire belford thou mayest read it if thou wilt 


on being hunted after by the enemy of my soul 

monday aug 21 

deliver me o lord from the evil man 

preserve me from the violent man 

who imagines mischief in his heart 

he hath sharpened his tongue like a serpent adders' poison is under his
lips 

keep me o lord from the hands of the wicked preserve me from the
violent man who hath purposed to overthrow my goings 

he hath hid a snare for me he hath spread a net by the way-side he
hath set gins for me in the way wherein i walked 

keep me from the snares which he hath laid for me and the gins of this
worker of iniquity 

the enemy hath persecuted my soul he hath smitten my life down to the
ground he hath made me dwell in darkness as those that have been long
dead 

therefore is my spirit overwhelmed within me my heart within me is
desolate 

hide not thy face from me in the day when i am in trouble 

for my days are consumed like smoke and my bones are burnt as the
hearth 

my heart is smitten and withered like grass so that i forget to eat my
bread 

by reason of the voice of my groaning my bones cleave to my skin 

i am like a pelican of the wilderness i am like an owl of the desart 

i watch and am as a sparrow alone upon the house-top 

i have eaten ashes like bread and mingled my drink with weeping 

because of thine indignation and thy wrath for thou hast lifted me up 
and cast me down 

my days are like a shadow that declineth and i am withered like grass 

grant not o lord the desires of the wicked further not his devices 
lest he exalt himself 


why now mrs lovick said i when i had read this meditation as she
called it i think i am very severely treated by the lady if she mean me
in all this for how is it that i am the enemy of her soul when i love
her both soul and body 

she says that i am a violent man and a wicked man that i have been
so i own but i repent and only wish to have it in my power to repair
the injuries i have done her 

the gin the snare the net mean matrimony i suppose but is it a crime
in me to wish to marry her would any other woman think it so and
choose to become a pelican in the wilderness or a lonely sparrow on the
house-top rather than have a mate that would chirp about her all day and
all night 

she says she has eaten ashes like bread a sad mistake to be sure and
mingled her drink with weeping sweet maudlin soul should i say of any
body confessing this but miss harlowe 

she concludes with praying that the desires of the wicked meaning poor
me i doubt may not be granted that my devices may not be furthered 
lest i exalt myself i should undoubtedly exalt myself and with reason 
could i have the honour and the blessing of such a wife and if my
desires have so honourable an end i know not why i should be called
wicked and why i should not be allowed to hope that my honest devices
may be furthered that i may exalt myself 

but here mrs lovick let me ask as something is undoubtedly meant by
the lonely sparrow on the house-top is not the dear creature at this
very instant tell me truly concealed in mrs smith's cockloft what
say you mrs lovick what say you mrs smith to this 

they assured me to the contrary and that shew as actually abroad and
they knew not where 

thou seest jack that i would fain have diverted the chagrin given me
not only by the women's talk but by this collection of scripture-texts
drawn up in array against me several other whimsical and light things i
said  all i had for it   with the same view but the widow would not let
me come off so she stuck to me and gave me as i told thee a good
deal of uneasiness by her sensible and serious expostulations mrs 
smith put in now-and-then and the two jack-pudding fellows john and
joseph not being present i had no provocation to turn the conversation
into a farce and at last they both joined warmly to endeavour to
prevail upon me to give up all thoughts of seeing the lady but i could
not hear of that on the contrary i besought mrs smith to let me have
one of her rooms but till i could see her and were it but for one two 
or three days i would pay a year's rent for it and quit it the moment
the interview was over but they desired to be excused and were sure
the lady would not come to the house till i was gone were it for a
month 

this pleased me for i found they did not think her so very ill as they
would have me believe her to be but i took no notice of the slip 
because i would not guard them against more of the like 

in short i told them i must and would see her but that it should be
with all the respect and veneration that heart could pay to excellence
like her's and that i would go round to all the churches in london and
westminster where there were prayers or service from sun-rise to
sun-set and haunt their house like a ghost till i had the opportunity
my soul panted after 

this i bid them tell her and thus ended our serious conversation 

i took leave of them and went down and stepping into my chair caused
myself to be carried to lincoln's-inn and walked in the gardens till the
chapel was opened and then i went in and staid prayers in hopes of
seeing the dear creature enter but to no purpose and yet i prayed most
devoutly that she might be conducted thither either by my good angel or
her own and indeed i burn more than ever with impatience to be once
more permitted to kneel at the feet of this adorable woman and had i
met her or espied her in the chapel it is my firm belief that i should
not have been able though it had been in the midst of the sacred office 
and in the presence of thousands to have forborne prostration to her 
and even clamorous supplication for her forgiveness a christian act the
exercise of it therefore worthy of the place 

after service was over i stept into my chair again and once more was
carried to smith's in hopes i might have surprised her there but no
such happiness for thy friend i staid in the back-shop an hour and an
half by my watch and again underwent a good deal of preachment from the
women john was mainly civil to me now won over a little by my serious
talk and the honour i professed for the lady they all three wished
matters could be made up between us but still insisted that she could
never get over her illness and that her heart was broken a cue i
suppose they had from you 

while i was there a letter was brought by a particular hand they seemed
very solicitous to hide it from me which made me suspect it was for her 
i desired to be suffered to cast an eye upon the seal and the
superscription promising to give it back to them unopened 

looking upon it i told them i knew the hand and seal it was from her
sister and i hoped it would bring her news that she would be pleased
with 


 see letter xxvi of this volume 


they joined most heartily in the same hope and giving the letter to
them again i civilly took leave and went away 

but i will be there again presently for i fancy my courteous behaviour
to these women will on their report of it procure me the favour i so
earnestly covet and so i will leave my letter unsealed to tell thee
the event of my next visit at smith's 


 


thy servant just calling i sent thee this and will soon follow it by
another mean time i long to hear how poor belton is to whom my best
wishes 



letter xvi

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
tuesday aug 22 


i have been under such concern for the poor man whose exit i almost
hourly expect and at the shocking scenes his illness and his agonies
exhibit that i have been only able to make memoranda of the melancholy
passages from which to draw up a more perfect account for the
instruction of us all when the writing appetite shall return 


 


it is returned indignation has revived it on receipt of thy letters of
sunday and yesterday by which i have reason to reproach thee in very
serious terms that thou hast not kept thy honour with me and if thy
breach of it be attended with such effects as i fear it will be i shall
let thee know more of my mind on this head 

if thou wouldst be thought in earnest in thy wishes to move the poor lady
in thy favour thy ludicrous behaviour at smith's when it comes to be
represented to her will have a very consistent appearance will it
not i will indeed confirm in her opinion that the grave is more to
be wished-for by one of her serious and pious turn than a husband
incapable either of reflection or remorse just recovered as thou art 
from a dangerous at least a sharp turn 

i am extremely concerned for the poor unprotected lady she was so
excessively low and weak on saturday that i could not be admitted to her
speech and to be driven out of her lodgings when it was fitter for her
to be in bed is such a piece of cruelty as he only could be guilty of
who could act as thou hast done by such an angel 

canst thou thyself say on reflection that it has not the look of a
wicked and hardened sportiveness in thee for the sake of a wanton
humour only since it can answer no end that thou proposest to thyself 
but the direct contrary to hunt from place to place a poor lady who 
like a harmless deer that has already a barbed shaft in her breast 
seeks only a refuge from thee in the shades of death 

but i will leave this matter upon thy own conscience to paint thee such
a scene from my memoranda as thou perhaps wilt be moved by more
effectually than by any other because it is such a one as thou thyself
must one day be a principal actor in and as i thought hadst very
lately in apprehension and is the last scene of one of thy more intimate
friends who has been for the four past days labouring in the agonies of
death for lovelace let this truth this undoubted truth be engraved
on thy memory in all thy gaieties that the life we are so fond of is
hardly life a mere breathing space only and that at the end of its
longest date 

 thou must die as well as belton 

thou knowest by tourville what we had done as to the poor man's worldly
affairs and that we had got his unhappy sister to come and live with him
 little did we think him so very near to his end and so i will proceed
to tell thee that when i arrived at his house on saturday night i found
him excessively ill but just raised and in his elbow-chair held up by
his nurse and mowbray the roughest and most untouched creature that ever
entered a sick man's chamber while the maid-servants were trying to
make that bed easier for him which he was to return to his mind ten
times uneasier than that could be and the true cause that the down was
no softer to him 

he had so much longed to see me as i was told by his sister whom i
sent for down to inquire how he was that they all rejoiced when i
entered here said mowbray here tommy is honest jack belford 

where where said the poor man 

i hear his voice cried mowbray he is coming up stairs 

in a transport of joy he would have raised himself at my entrance but
had like to have pitched out of the chair and when recovered called me
his best friend his kindest friend but burst into a flood of tears o
jack o belford said he see the way i am in see how weak so much 
and so soon reduced do you know me do you know your poor friend
belton 

you are not so much altered my dear belton as you think you are but i
see you are weak very weak and i am sorry for it 

weak weak indeed my dearest belford said he and weaker in mind if
possible than in body and wept bitterly or i should not thus unman
myself i who never feared any thing to be forced to show myself such
a nursling i am quite ashamed of myself but don't despise me dear
belford don't despise me i beseech thee 

i ever honoured a man that could weep for the distresses of others and
ever shall said i and such a one cannot be insensible of his own 

however i could not help being visibly moved at the poor fellow's emotion 

now said the brutal mowbray do i think thee insufferable jack our
poor friend is already a peg too low and here thou art letting him down
lower and lower still this soothing of him in his dejected moments and
joining thy womanish tears with his is not the way i am sure it is not 
if our lovelace were here he'd tell thee so 

thou art an impenetrable creature replied i unfit to be present at a
scene the terrors of which thou wilt not be able to feel till thou
feelest them in thyself and then if thou hadst time for feeling my
life for thine thou behavest as pitifully as those thou thinkest most
pitiful 

then turning to the poor sick man tears my dear belton are no signs of
an unmanly but contrarily of a humane nature they ease the
over-charged heart which would burst but for that kindly and natural
relief 

 give sorrow words says shakspeare 
 the grief that does not speak 
 whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break 

i know my dear belton thou usedst to take pleasure in repetitions from
the poets but thou must be tasteless of their beauties now yet be not
discountenanced by this uncouth and unreflecting mowbray for as juvenal
says tears are the prerogative of manhood 

tis at least seasonably said my dear belford it is kind to keep me in
countenance for this womanish weakness as mowbray has been upbraidingly
calling it ever since he has been with me and in so doing whatever i
might have thought in such high health as he enjoys has convinced me 
that bottle-friends feel nothing but what moves in that little circle 

well well proceed in your own way jack i love my friend belton as
well as you can do yet for the blood of me i cannot but think that
soothing a man's weakness is increasing it 

if it be a weakness to be touched at great and concerning events in
which our humanity is concerned said i thou mayest be right 

i have seen many a man said the rough creature going up holborn-hill 
that has behaved more like a man than either of you 

ay but mowbray replied the poor man those wretches have not had their
minds enervated by such infirmities of body as i have long laboured
under thou art a shocking fellow and ever wert but to be able to
remember nothing in these moments but what reproaches me and to know
that i cannot hold it long and what may then be my lot if but
interrupting himself and turning to me give me thy pity jack tis
balm to my wounded soul and let mowbray sit indifferent enough to the
pangs of a dying friend to laugh at us both 

the hardened fellow then retired with the air of a lovelace only more
stupid yawning and stretching instead of humming a tune as thou didst
at smith's 

i assisted to get the poor man into bed he was so weak and low that he
could not bear the fatigue and fainted away and i verily thought was
quite gone but recovering and his doctor coming and advising to keep
him quiet i retired and joined mowbray in the garden who took more
delight to talk of the living lovelace and levities than of the dying
belton and his repentance 

i just saw him again on saturday night before i went to bed which i did
early for i was surfeited with mowbray's frothy insensibility and could
not bear him 

it is such a horrid thing to think of that a man who had lived in such
strict terms of what shall i call it with another the proof does not
come out so as to say friendship who had pretended so much love for
him could not bear to be out of his company would ride an hundred miles
on end to enjoy it and would fight for him be the cause right or wrong 
yet now could be so little moved to see him in such misery of body and
mind as to be able to rebuke him and rather ridicule than pity him 
because he was more affected by what he felt than he had seen a
malefactor hardened perhaps by liquor and not softened by previous
sickness on his going to execution 

this put me strongly in mind of what the divine miss harlowe once said to
me talking of friendship and what my friendship to you required of me 
depend upon it mr belford  said she that one day you will be
convinced that what you call friendship is chaff and stubble and that
nothing is worthy of that sacred name 

 that has not virtue for its base 


sunday morning i was called up at six o'clock at the poor man's earnest
request and found him in a terrible agony o jack jack said he 
looking wildly as if he had seen a spectre come nearer me dear dear
belford save me then clasping my arm with both his hands and rearing
up his head towards me his eyes strangely rolling save me dear
belford save me repeated he 

i put my other arm about him save you from what my dear belton said i 
save you from what nothing shall hurt you what must i save you from 

recovering from his terror he sunk down again o save me from myself 
said he save me from my own reflections o dear jack what a thing it
is to die and not to have one comfortable reflection to revolve what
would i give for one year of my past life only one year and to have
the same sense of things that i now have 

i tried to comfort him as well as i could but free-livers to free-livers
are sorry death-bed comforters and he broke in upon me o my dear
belford said he i am told and i have heard you ridiculed for it 
that the excellent miss harlowe has wrought a conversion in you may it
be so you are a man of sense o may it be so now is your time now 
that you are in full vigour of mind and body but your poor belton 
alas your poor belton kept his vices till they left him and see the
miserable effects in debility of mind and despondency were mowbray
here and were he to laugh at me i would own that this is the cause of
my despair that god's justice cannot let his mercy operate for my
comfort for oh i have been very very wicked and have despised the
offers of his grace till he has withdrawn it from me for ever 

i used all the arguments i could think of to give him consolation and
what i said had such an effect upon him as to quiet his mind for the
greatest part of the day and in a lucid hour his memory served him to
repeat these lines of dryden grasping my hand and looking wistfully
upon me 

 o that i less could fear to lose this being 
 which like a snow-ball in my coward hand 
 the more tis grasped the faster melts away 

in the afternoon of sunday he was inquisitive after you and your
present behaviour to miss harlowe i told him how you had been and how
light you made of it mowbray was pleased with your impenetrable
hardness of heart and said bob lovelace was a good edge-tool and
steel to the back and such coarse but hearty praises he gave you as an
abandoned man might give and only an abandoned man could wish to
deserve 

but hadst thou heard what the poor dying belton said on this occasion 
perhaps it would have made thee serious an hour or two at least 

when poor lovelace is brought  said he to a sick-bed as i am now 
and his mind forebodes that it is impossible he should recover which
his could not do in his late illness if it had he could not have
behaved so lightly in it when he revolves his past mis-spent life his
actions of offence to helpless innocents in miss harlowe's case
particularly what then will he think of himself or of his past actions 
his mind debilitated his strength turned into weakness unable to stir
or to move without help not one ray of hope darting in upon his
benighted soul his conscience standing in the place of a thousand
witnesses his pains excruciating weary of the poor remnant of life he
drags yet dreading that in a few short hours his bad will be changed
to worse nay to worst of all and that worst of all to last beyond
time and to all eternity o jack what will he then think of the poor
transitory gratifications of sense which now engage all his attention 
tell him dear belford tell him how happy he is if he know his own
dying happiness how happy compared to his poor dying friend that he
has recovered from his illness and has still an opportunity lent him 
for which i would give a thousand worlds had i them to give 

i approved exceedingly of his reflections as suited to his present
circumstances and inferred consolations to him from a mind so properly
touched 

he proceeded in the like penitent strain i have lived a very wicked
life so have we all we have never made a conscience of doing whatever
mischief either force or fraud enabled us to do we have laid snares for
the innocent heart and have not scrupled by the too-ready sword to
extend as occasions offered the wrongs we did to the persons whom we
had before injured in their dearest relations but yet i flatter
myself sometimes that i have less to answer for than either lovelace or
mowbray for i by taking to myself that accursed deceiver from whom thou
hast freed me and who for years unknown to me was retaliating upon
my own head some of the evils i had brought upon others and retiring 
and living with her as a wife was not party to half the mischiefs that
i doubt they and tourville and even you belford committed as to the
ungrateful thomasine i hope i have met with my punishment in her but
notwithstanding this dost thou not think that such an action and such
an action and such an action  and then he recapitulated several
enormities in the perpetration of which led on by false bravery and
the heat of youth and wine we have all been concerned   dost thou not
think that these villanies let me call them now by their proper name 
joined to the wilful and gloried-in neglect of every duty that our better
sense and education gave us to know were required of us as men and
christians are not enough to weigh down my soul into despondency 
indeed indeed they are and now to hope for mercy and to depend upon
the efficacy of that gracious attribute when that no less shining one of
justice forbids me to hope how can i i who have despised all
warnings and taken no advantage of the benefit i might have reaped from
the lingering consumptive illness i have laboured under but left all to
the last stake hoping for recovery against hope and driving off
repentance till that grace is denied me for oh my dear belford i can
now neither repent nor pray as i ought my heart is hardened and i can
do nothing but despair 

more he would have said but overwhelmed with grief and infirmity he
bowed his head upon his pangful bosom endeavouring to hide from the
sight of the hardened mowbray who just then entered the room those
tears which he could not restrain 

prefaced by a phlegmatic hem sad very sad truly cried mowbray who
sat himself down on one side of the bed as i sat on the other his eyes
half closed and his lips pouting out to his turned-up nose his chin
curdled  to use one of thy descriptions  leaving one at a loss to know
whether stupid drowsiness or intense contemplation had got most hold of
him 

an excellent however uneasy lesson mowbray said i by my faith it is 
it may one day who knows how soon be our own case 

i thought of thy yawning-fit as described in thy letter of aug 13 for
up started mowbray writhing and shaking himself as in an ague-fit his
hands stretched over his head with thy hoy hoy hoy yawning and then
recovering himself with another stretch and a shake what's o'clock 
cried he pulling out his watch and stalking by long tip-toe strides
through the room down stairs he went and meeting the maid in the
passage i heard him say betty bring me a bumper of claret thy poor
master and this d d belford are enough to throw a hercules into the
vapours 

mowbray after this assuming himself in our friend's library which is 
as thou knowest chiefly classical and dramatical found out a passage in
lee's oedipus which he would needs have to be extremely apt and in he
came full fraught with the notion of the courage it would give the dying
man and read it to him tis poetical and pretty this is it 

 when the sun sets shadows that show'd at noon
 but small appear most long and terrible 
 so when we think fate hovers o'er our heads 
 our apprehensions shoot beyond all bounds 
 owls ravens crickets seem the watch of death 
 nature's worst vermin scare her godlike sons 
 echoes the very leavings of a voice 
 grow babbling ghosts and call us to our graves 
 each mole-hill thought swells to a huge olympus 
 while we fantastic dreamers heave and puff 
 and sweat with our imagination's weight 

he expected praises for finding this out but belton turning his head
from him ah dick said he these are not the reflections of a dying
man what thou wilt one day feel if it be what i now feel will
convince thee that the evils before thee and with thee are more than
the effects of imagination 

i was called twice on sunday night to him for the poor fellow when his
reflections on his past life annoy him most is afraid of being left with
the women and his eyes they tell me hunt and roll about for me 
where's mr belford but i shall tire him out cries he yet beg of him
to step to me yet don't yet do were once the doubting and changeful
orders he gave and they called me accordingly 

but alas what could belford do for him belford who had been but too
often the companion of his guilty hours who wants mercy as much as he
does and is unable to promise it to himself though tis all he can bid
his poor friend rely upon 

what miscreants are we what figures shall we make in these terrible
hours 

if miss harlowe's glorious example on one hand and the terrors of this
poor man's last scene on the other affect me not i must be abandoned to
perdition as i fear thou wilt be if thou benefittest not thyself from
both 

among the consolatory things i urged when i was called up the last time
on sunday night i told him that he must not absolutely give himself up
to despair that many of the apprehensions he was under were such as the
best men must have on the dreadful uncertainty of what was to succeed to
this life tis well observed said i by a poetical divine who was an
excellent christian that

 death could not a more sad retinue find 
 sickness and pain before and darkness all behind 


 the rev mr norris of bremerton 


about eight o'clock yesterday monday morning i found him a little
calmer he asked me who was the author of the two lines i had repeated
to him and made me speak them over again a sad retinue indeed said
the poor man and then expressing his hopelessness of life and his
terrors at the thoughts of dying and drawing from thence terrible
conclusions with regard to his future state there is said i such a
natural aversion to death in human nature that you are not to imagine 
that you my dear belton are singular in the fear of it and in the
apprehensions that fill the thoughtful mind upon its approach but you
ought as much as possible to separate those natural fears which all men
must have on so solemn an occasion from those particular ones which your
justly-apprehended unfitness fills you with mr pomfret in his
prospect of death which i dipped into last night from a collection in
your closet which i put into my pocket says  and i turned to the
place 

 merely to die no man of reason fears 
 for certainly we must 
 as we are born return to dust 
 tis the last point of many ling-ring years 
 but whither then we go 
 whither we fain would know 
 but human understanding cannot show 
 this makes us tremble 

mr pomfret therefore proceeded i had such apprehensions of this dark
state as you have and the excellent divine i hinted at last night who
had very little else but human frailties to reproach himself with and
whose miscellanies fell into my hands among my uncle's books in my
attendance upon him in his last hours says 

 it must be done my soul but tis a strange 
 a dismal and mysterious change 
 when thou shalt leave this tenement of clay 
 and to an unknown somewhere wing away 
 when time shall be eternity and thou
 shalt be thou know'st not what and live 
 thou know'st not how 
 amazing state no wonder that we dread
 to think of death or view the dead 
 thou'rt all wrapt up in clouds as if to thee
 our very knowledge had antipathy 

then follows what i repeated 

 death could not a more sad retinue find 
 sickness and pain before and darkness all behind 

alas my dear belford  inferred the unhappy deep-thinker  what poor
creatures does this convince me we mortals are at best but what then
must be the case of such a profligate as i who by a past wicked life
have added greater force to these natural terrors if death be so
repugnant a thing to human nature that good men will be startled at it 
what must it be to one who has lived a life of sense and appetite nor
ever reflected upon the end which i now am within view of 

what could i say to an inference so fairly drawn mercy mercy 
unbounded mercy was still my plea though his repeated opposition of
justice to it in a manner silenced that plea and what would i have
given to have had rise in my mind one good eminently good action to
have remembered him of in order to combat his fears with it 

i believe lovelace i shall tire thee and that more with the subject
of my letter than even with the length of it but really i think thy
spirits are so offensively up since thy recovery that i ought as the
melancholy subjects offer to endeavour to reduce thee to the standard
of humanity by expatiating upon them and then thou canst not but be
curious to know every thing that concerns the poor man for whom thou
hast always expressed a great regard i will therefore proceed as i have
begun if thou likest not to read it now lay it by if thou wilt till
the like circumstances befall thee till like reflections from those
circumstances seize thee and then take it up and compare the two cases
together 


 


at his earnest request i sat up with him last night and poor man it
is impossible to tell thee how easy and safe he thought himself in my
company for the first part of the night a drowning man will catch at a
straw the proverb well says and a straw was i with respect to any real
help i could give him he often awaked in terrors and once calling out
for me dear belford said he where are you oh there you are give
me your friendly hand then grasping it and putting his clammy 
half-cold lips to it how kind i fear every thing when you are absent 
but the presence of a friend a sympathising friend oh how comfortable 

but about four in the morning he frighted me much he waked with three
terrible groans and endeavoured to speak but could not presently and
when he did jack jack jack five or six times repeated he as quick as
thought now now now save me save me save me i am going going
indeed 

i threw my arms about him and raised him upon his pillow as he was
sinking as if to hide himself in the bed-clothes and staring wildly 
where am i said he a little recovering did you not see him turning
his head this way and that horror in his countenance did you not see
him 

see whom see what my dear belton 

o lay me upon the bed again cried he let me not die upon the floor 
lay me down gently and stand by me leave me not all all will soon
be over 

you are already my dear belton upon the bed you have not been upon
the floor this is a strong delirium you are faint for want of
refreshment  for he had refused several times to take any thing  let me
persuade you to take some of this cordial julap i will leave you if
you will not oblige me 

he then readily took it but said he could have sworn that tom metcalfe
had been in the room and had drawn him out of bed by the throat 
upbraiding him with the injuries he had first done his sister and then
him in the duel to which he owed that fever which cost him his life 

thou knowest the story lovelace too well to need my repeating it but 
mercy on us if in these terrible moments all the evils we do rise to our
frighted imaginations if so what shocking scenes have i but still
what more shocking ones hast thou to go through if as the noble poet
says 

 if any sense at that sad time remains 

the doctor ordered him an opiate this morning early which operated so
well that he dosed and slept several hours more quietly than he had done
for the two past days and nights though he had sleeping-draughts given
him before but it is more and more evident every hour that nature is
almost worn out in him 


 


mowbray quite tired with this house of mourning intends to set out in
the morning to find you he was not a little rejoiced to hear you were
in town i believe to have a pretence to leave us 


 


he has just taken leave of his poor friend intending to go away early 
an everlasting leave i may venture to say for i think he will hardly
live till to-morrow night 

i believe the poor man would not have been sorry had he left him when i
arrived for tis a shocking creature and enjoys too strong health to
know how to pity the sick then to borrow an observation from thee he
has by nature strong bodily organs which those of his soul are not
likely to whet out and he as well as the wicked friend he is going to 
may last a great while from the strength of their constitutions though
so greatly different in their talents if neither the sword nor the
halter interpose 

i must repeat that i cannot but be very uneasy for the poor lady whom
you so cruelly persecute and that i do not think that you have kept your
honour with me i was apprehensive indeed that you would attempt to
see her as soon as you got well enough to come up and i told her as
much making use of it as an argument to prepare her for your visit and
to induce her to stand it but she could not it is plain bear the
shock of it and indeed she told me that she would not see you though
but for one half-hour for the world 

could she have prevailed upon herself i know that the sight of her would
have been as affecting to you as your visit could have been to her when
you had seen to what a lovely skeleton for she is really lovely still 
nor can she with such a form and features be otherwise you have in a
few weeks reduced one of the most charming women in the world and that
in the full bloom of her youth and beauty 

mowbray undertakes to carry this that he may be more welcome to you he
says were it to be sent unsealed the characters we write in would be
hebrew to the dunce i desire you to return it and i'll give you a copy
of it upon demand for i intend to keep it by me as a guard against the
infection of your company which might otherwise perhaps some time
hence be apt to weaken the impressions i always desire to have of the
awful scene before me god convert us both 



letter xvii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
wednesday morn 11 o'clock 


i believe no man has two such servants as i have because i treat them
with kindness and do not lord it over my inferiors and d n and curse
them by looks and words like mowbray or beat their teeth out like
lovelace but cry pr'ythee harry do this and pr'ythee jonathan do
that the fellows pursue their own devices and regard nothing i say but
what falls in with these 

here this vile harry who might have brought your letter of yesterday in
good time came not in with it till past eleven at night drunk i
suppose and concluding that i was in bed as he pretends because he
was told i sat up the preceding night brought it not to me and having
overslept himself just as i had sealed up my letter in comes the
villain with the forgotten one shaking his ears and looking as if he
himself did not believe the excuses he was going to make i questioned
him about it and heard his pitiful pleas and though i never think it
becomes a gentleman to treat people insolently who by their stations are
humbled beneath his feet yet could i not forbear to lovelace and mowbray
him most cordially 

and this detaining mowbray who was ready to set out to you before while
i write a few lines upon it the fierce fellow who is impatient to
exchange the company of a dying belton for that of a too-lively lovelace 
affixed a supplement of curses upon the staring fellow that was larger
than my book nor did i offer to take off the bear from such a mongrel 
since on this occasion he deserved not of me the protection which every
master owes to a good servant 

he has not done cursing him yet for stalking about the court-yard with
his boots on the poor fellow dressing his horse and unable to get from
him he is at him without mercy and i will heighten his impatience 
 since being just under the window where i am writing he will not let me
attend to my pen by telling you how he fills my ears as well as the
fellow's with his hay sir and g d d n ye sir and were ye my
servant ye dog ye and must i stay here till the mid-day sun scorches
me to a parchment for such a mangy dog's drunken neglect ye lie 
sirrah ye lie i tell you  i hear the fellow's voice in an humble
excusatory tone though not articulately  ye lie ye dog i'd a good
mind to thrust my whip down your drunken throat d n me if i would not
flay the skin from the back of such a rascal if thou wert mine and have
dog's-skin gloves made of it for thy brother scoundrels to wear in
remembrance of thy abuses of such a master 

the poor horse suffers for this i doubt not for what now and stand
still and be d d to ye cries the fellow with a kick i suppose which
he better deserves himself for these varlets where they can are
mowbrays and lovelaces to man or beast and not daring to answer him is
flaying the poor horse 

i hear the fellow is just escaped the horse better curried than
ordinary i suppose in half the usual time by his clanking shoes and
mowbray's silence letting me know that i may now write on and so i
will tell thee that in the first place little as i as well as you 
regard dreams i would have thee lay thine to heart for i could give
thee such an interpretation of it as would shock thee perhaps and if
thou askest me for it i will 

mowbray calls to me from the court-yard that tis a cursed hot day and
he shall be fried by riding in the noon of it and that poor belton longs
to see me so i will only add my earnest desire that you will give over
all thoughts of seeing the lady if when this comes to your hand you
have not seen her and that it would be kind if you'd come and for
the last time you will ever see your poor friend share my concern for
him and in him see what in a little time will be your fate and mine 
and that of mowbray tourville and the rest of us for what are ten 
fifteen twenty or thirty years to look back to in the longest of
which periods forward we shall all perhaps be mingled with the dust from
which we sprung 



letter xviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wednesday morn aug 23 


all alive dear jack and in ecstacy likely to be once more a happy
man for i have received a letter from my beloved miss harlowe in
consequence i suppose of that which i mentioned in my last to be left
for her from her sister and i am setting out for berks directly to
show the contents to my lord m and to receive the congratulations of all
my kindred upon it 

i went last night as i intended to smith's but the dear creature was
not returned at near ten o'clock and lighting upon tourville i took
him home with me and made him sing me out of my megrims i went to bed
tolerably easy at two had bright and pleasant dreams not such of a
frightful one as that i gave thee an account of and at eight this
morning as i was dressing to be in readiness against the return of my
fellow whom i had sent to inquire after the lady i had the following
letter brought to me by a chairman 


to robert lovelace esq 
tuesday night 11 o'clock aug 22 


sir 

i have good news to tell you i am setting out with all diligence for my
father's house i am bid to hope that he will receive his poor penitent
with a goodness peculiar to himself for i am overjoyed with the
assurance of a thorough reconciliation through the interposition of a
dear blessed friend whom i always loved and honoured i am so taken up
with my preparation for this joyful and long-wished-for journey that i
cannot spare one moment for any other business having several matters of
the last importance to settle first so pray sir don't disturb or
interrupt me i beseech you don't you may possibly in time see me at my
father's at least if it be not your own fault 

i will write a letter which shall be sent you when i am got thither and
received till when i am etc 

clarissa harlowe 


 


i dispatched instantly a letter to the dear creature assuring her with
the most thankful joy that i would directly set out for berks and wait
the issue of the happy reconciliation and the charming hopes she had
filled me with i poured out upon her a thousand blessings i declared
that it should be the study of my whole life to merit such transcendent
goodness and that there was nothing which her father or friends should
require at my hands that i would not for her sake comply with in order
to promote and complete so desirable a reconciliation 

i hurried it away without taking a copy of it and i have ordered the
chariot-and-six to be got ready and hey for m hall let me but know
how belton does i hope a letter from thee is on the road and if the
poor fellow can spare thee make haste i command thee to attend this
truly divine lady thou mayest not else see her of months perhaps at
least not while she is miss harlowe and oblige me if possible with
one letter before she sets out confirming to me and accounting for this
generous change 

but what accounting for it is necessary the dear creature cannot
receive consolation herself but she must communicate it to others how
noble she would not see me in her adversity but no sooner does the sun
of prosperity begin to shine upon her than she forgives me 

i know to whose mediation all this is owing it is to colonel morden's 
she always as she says loved and honoured him and he loved her above
all his relations 

i shall now be convinced that there is something in dreams the opening
cloud is the reconciliation in view the bright form lifting up my
charmer through it to a firmament stuck round with golden cherubims and
seraphims indicates the charming little boys and girls that will be the
fruits of this happy reconciliation the welcomes thrice repeated are
those of her family now no more to be deemed implacable yet are they
family too that my soul cannot mingle with 

but then what is my tumbling over and over through the floor into a
frightful hole descending as she ascends ho only this it alludes to
my disrelish to matrimony which is a bottomless pit a gulph and i know
not what and i suppose had i not awoke in such a plaguy fright i had
been soused into some river at the bottom of the hole and then been
carried mundified or purified from my past iniquities by the same
bright form waiting for me upon the mossy banks to my beloved girl 
and we should have gone on cherubiming of it and caroling to the end of
the chapter 

but what are the black sweeping mantles and robes of lord m thrown over
my face and what are those of the ladies o jack i have these too 
they indicate nothing in the world but that my lord will be so good as to
die and leave me all he has so rest to thy good-natured soul honest
lord m 

lady sarah sadleir and lady betty lawrance will also die and leave me
swinging legacies 

miss charlotte and her sister what will become of the oh they will be
in mourning of course for their uncle and aunts that's right 

as to morden's flashing through the window and crying die lovelace 
and be d d if thou wilt not repair my cousin's wrong that is only 
that he would have sent me a challenge had i not been disposed to do the
lady justice 

all i dislike is this part of the dream for even in a dream i would
not be thought to be threatened into any measure though i liked it ever
so well 

and so much for my prophetic dream 

dear charming creature what a meeting will there be between her and her
father and mother and uncles what transports what pleasure will this
happy long-wished-for reconciliation give her dutiful heart and indeed
now methinks i am glad she is so dutiful to them for her duty to her
parents is a conviction to me that she will be as dutiful to her husband 
since duty upon principle is an uniform thing 

why pr'ythee now jack i have not been so much to blame as thou
thinkest for had it not been for me who have led her into so much
distress she could neither have received nor given the joy that will now
overwhelm them all so here rises great and durable good out of
temporary evil 

i know they loved her the pride and glory of their family too well to
hold out long 

i wish i could have seen arabella's letter she has always been so much
eclipsed by her sister that i dare say she has signified this
reconciliation to her with intermingled phlegm and wormwood and her
invitation must certainly runs all in the rock-water style 

i shall long to see the promised letter too when she is got to her
father's which i hope will give an account of the reception she will
meet with 

there is a solemnity however i think in the style of her letter which
pleases and affects me at the same time but as it is evident she loves
me still and hopes soon to see me at her father's she could not help
being a little solemn and half-ashamed  dear blushing pretty rogue   to
own her love after my usage of her 

and then her subscription till when i am clarissa harlowe as much as
to say after that i shall be if not to your own fault 
clarissa lovelace 

o my best love my ever-generous and adorable creature how much does
this thy forgiving goodness exalt us both me for the occasion given
thee thee for turning it so gloriously to thy advantage and to the
honour of both 

and if my beloved creature you will but connive at the imperfections of
your adorer and not play the wife with me if while the charms of
novelty have their force with me i should happen to be drawn aside by
the love of intrigue and of plots that my soul delights to form and
pursue and if thou wilt not be open-eyed to the follies of my youth  a
transitory state   every excursion shall serve but the more to endear
thee to me till in time and in a very little time too i shall get
above sense and then charmed by thy soul-attracting converse and
brought to despise my former courses what i now at distance consider
as a painful duty will be my joyful choice and all my delight will
centre in thee 


 


mowbray is just arrived with thy letters i therefore close my agreeable
subject to attend to one which i doubt will be very shocking 

i have engaged the rough varlet to bear me company in the morning to
berks where i shall file off the rust he has contracted in his
attendance upon the poor fellow 

he tells me that between the dying belton and the preaching belford he
shan't be his own man these three days and says that thou addest to the
unhappy fellow's weakness instead of giving him courage to help him to
bear his destiny 

i am sorry he takes the unavoidable lot so heavily but he has been long
ill and sickness enervates the mind as well as the body as he himself
very significantly observed to thee 



letter xix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wedn evening 


i have been reading thy shocking letter poor belton what a multitude of
lively hours have we passed together he was a fearless cheerful
fellow who'd have thought all that should end in such dejected
whimpering and terror 

but why didst thou not comfort the poor man about the rencounter between
him and that poltroon metcalfe he acted in that affair like a man of
true honour and as i should have acted in the same circumstances tell
him i say so and that what happened he could neither help nor foresee 

some people are as sensible of a scratch from a pin's point as others
from a push of a sword and who can say any thing for the sensibility of
such fellows metcalfe would resent for his sister when his sister
resented not for herself had she demanded her brother's protection and
resentment that would have been another man's matte to speak in lord
m s phrase but she herself thought her brother a coxcomb to busy
himself undesired in her affairs and wished for nothing but to be
provided for decently and privately in her lying-in and was willing to
take the chance of maintenon-ing his conscience in her favour and
getting him to marry when the little stranger came for she knew what
an easy good-natured fellow he was and indeed if she had prevailed
upon him it might have been happy for both as then he would not have
fallen in with his cursed thomasine but truly this officious brother of
her's must interpose this made a trifling affair important and what
was the issue metcalfe challenged belton met him disarmed him gave
him his life but the fellow more sensible in his skin than in his head 
having received a scratch was frighted it gave him first a puke then
a fever and then he died that was all and how could belton help that 
 but sickness a long tedious sickness will make a bugbear of any thing
to a languishing heart i see that and so far was mowbray a-propos in
the verses from nat lee which thou hast described 


 madam maintenon was reported to have prevailed upon lewis xiv of
france in his old age sunk as he was by ill success in the field 
to marry her by way of compounding with his conscience for the freedoms
of his past life to which she attributed his public losses 


merely to die no man of reason fears is a mistake say thou or say
thy author what ye will and thy solemn parading about the natural
repugnance between life and death is a proof that it is 

let me tell thee jack that so much am i pleased with this world in
the main though in some points too the world to make a person of it 
has been a rascal to me so delighted am i with the joys of youth with
my worldly prospects as to fortune and now newly with the charming
hopes given me by my dear thrice dear and for ever dear clarissa that
were i even sure that nothing bad would come hereafter i should be very
loth very much afraid if thou wilt have it so to lay down my life
and them together and yet upon a call of honour no man fears death
less than myself 

but i have not either inclination or leisure to weigh thy leaden
arguments except in the pig or as thou wouldst say in the lump 

if i return thy letters let me have them again some time hence that is
to say when i am married or when poor belton is half forgotten or when
time has enrolled the honest fellow among those whom we have so long
lost that we may remember them with more pleasure than pain and then i
may give them a serious perusal and enter with thee as deeply as thou
wilt into the subject 

when i am married said i what a sound has that 

i must wait with patience for a sight of this charming creature till she
is at her father's and yet as the but blossoming beauty as thou
tellest me is reduced to a shadow i should have been exceedingly
delighted to see her now and every day till the happy one that i might
have the pleasure of observing how sweetly hour by hour she will rise
to her pristine glories by means of that state of ease and contentment 
which will take place of the stormy past upon her reconciliation with
her friends and our happy nuptials 



letter xx

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


well but now my heart is a little at ease i will condescend to take
brief notice of some other passages in thy letters 

i find i am to thank thee that the dear creature has avoided my visit 
things are now in so good a train that i must forgive thee else thou
shouldst have heard more of this new instance of disloyalty to thy
general 

thou art continually giving thyself high praise by way of opposition as
i may say to others gently and artfully blaming thyself for qualities
thou wouldst at the same time have to be thought and which generally are
thought praise-worthy 

thus in the airs thou assumest about thy servants thou wouldst pass for
a mighty humane mortal and that at the expense of mowbray and me whom
thou representest as kings and emperors to our menials yet art thou
always unhappy in thy attempts of this kind and never canst make us who
know thee believe that to be a virtue in thee which is but the effect
of constitutional phlegm and absurdity 

knowest thou not that some men have a native dignity in their manner 
that makes them more regarded by a look than either thou canst be in thy
low style or mowbray in his high 

i am fit to be a prince i can tell thee for i reward well and i punish
seasonably and properly and i am generally as well served by any man 

the art of governing these underbred varlets lies more in the dignity of
looks than in words and thou art a sorry fellow to think humanity
consists in acting by thy servants as men must act who are not able to
pay them their wages or had made them masters of secrets which if
divulged would lay them at the mercy of such wretches 

now to me who never did any thing i was ashamed to own and who have
more ingenuousness than ever man had who can call a villany by its own
right name though practised by myself and by my own readiness to
reproach myself anticipate all reproach from others who am not such a
hypocrite as to wish the world to think me other or better than i am 
it is my part to look a servant into his duty if i can nor will i keep
one who knows not how to take me by a nod or a wink and who when i
smile shall not be all transport when i frown all terror if indeed 
i am out of the way a little i always take care to rewards the varlets
for patiently bearing my displeasure but this i hardly ever am but when
a fellow is egregiously stupid in any plain point of duty or will be
wiser than his master and when he shall tell me that he thought acting
contrary to my orders was the way to serve me best 

one time or other i will enter the lists with thee upon thy conduct and
mine to servants and i will convince thee that what thou wouldst have
pass for humanity if it be indiscriminately practised to all tempers 
will perpetually subject thee to the evils thou complainest of and
justly too and that he only is fit to be a master of servants who can
command their attention as much by a nod as if he were to pr'ythee a
fellow to do his duty on one hand or to talk of flaying and
horse-whipping like mowbray on the other for the servant who being
used to expect thy creeping style will always be master of his master 
and he who deserves to be treated as the other is not fit to be any
man's servant nor would i keep such a fellow to rub my horse's heels 

i shall be the readier to enter the lists with thee upon this argument 
because i have presumption enough to think that we have not in any of our
dramatic poets that i can at present call to mind one character of a
servant of either sex that is justly hit off so absurdly wise some 
and so sottishly foolish others and both sometime in the same person 
foils drawn from lees or dregs of the people to set off the characters of
their masters and mistresses nay sometimes which is still more absurd 
introduced with more wit than the poet has to bestow upon their
principals mere flints and steels to strike fire with or to vary the
metaphor to serve for whetstones to wit which otherwise could not be
made apparent or for engines to be made use of like the machinery of
the antient poets or the still more unnatural soliloquy to help on a
sorry plot or to bring about a necessary eclaircissement to save the
poet the trouble of thinking deeply for a better way to wind up his
bottoms 

of this i am persuaded whatever my practice be to my own servants 
that thou wilt be benefited by my theory when we come to controvert the
point for then i shall convince thee that the dramatic as well as
natural characteristics of a good servant ought to be fidelity common
sense cheerful obedience and silent respect that wit in his station 
except to his companions would be sauciness that he should never
presume to give his advice that if he venture to expostulate upon any
unreasonable command or such a one a appeared to him to be so he should
do it with humility and respect and take a proper season for it but
such lessons do most of the dramatic performances i have seen give where
servants are introduced as characters essential to the play or to act
very significant or long parts in it which of itself i think a
fault such lessons i say do they give to the footmen's gallery that
i have not wondered we have so few modest or good men-servants among
those who often attend their masters or mistresses to plays then how
miserably evident must that poet's conscious want of genius be who can
stoop to raise or give force to a clap by the indiscriminate roar of the
party-coloured gallery 

but this subject i will suspend to a better opportunity that is to say 
to the happy one when my nuptials with my clarissa will oblige me to
increase the number of my servants and of consequence to enter more
nicely into their qualifications 


 


although i have the highest opinion that man can have of the generosity
of my dear miss harlowe yet i cannot for the heart of me account for
this agreeable change in her temper but one way faith and troth 
belford i verily believe laying all circumstances together that the
dear creature unexpectedly finds herself in the way i have so ardently
wished her to be in and that this makes her at last incline to favour
me that she may set the better face upon her gestation when at her
father's 

if this be the case all her falling away and her fainting fits are
charmingly accounted for nor is it surprising that such a sweet novice
in these matters should not for some time have known to what to
attribute her frequent indispositions if this should be the case how i
shall laugh at thee and when i am sure of her at the dear novice
herself that all her grievous distresses shall end in a man-child which
i shall love better than all the cherubims and seraphims that may come
after though there were to be as many of them as i beheld in my dream 
in which a vast expanse of firmament was stuck as full of them as it
could hold 

i shall be afraid to open thy next lest it bring me the account of poor
belton's death yet as there are no hopes of his recovery but what
should i say unless the poor man were better fitted but thy heavy
sermon shall not affect me too much neither 

i enclose thy papers and do thou transcribe them for me or return them 
for there are some things in them which at a proper season a mortal
man should not avoid attending to and thou seemest to have entered
deeply into the shocking subject but here i will end lest i grow too
serious 


 


thy servant called here about an hour ago to know if i had any commands 
i therefore hope that thou wilt have this early in the morning and if
thou canst let me hear from thee do i'll stretch an hour or two in
expectation of it yet i must be at lord m s to-morrow night if
possible though ever so late 

thy fellow tells me the poor man is much as he was when mowbray left him 

wouldst thou think that this varlet mowbray is sorry that i am so near
being happy with miss harlowe and egad jack i know not what to say
to it now the fruit seems to be within my reach but let what will come 
i'll stand to't for i find i can't live without her 



letter xxi

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
wednesday three o'clock 


i will proceed where i left off in my last 

as soon as i had seen mowbray mounted i went to attend upon poor belton 
whom i found in dreadful agonies in which he awoke after he generally
does 

the doctor came in presently after and i was concerned at the scene that
passed between them 

it opened with the dying man's asking him with melancholy earnestness 
if nothing if nothing at all could be done for him 

the doctor shook his head and told him he doubted not 

i cannot die said the poor man i cannot think of dying i am very
desirous of living a little longer if i could but be free from these
horrible pains in my stomach and head can you give me nothing to make
me pass one week but one week in tolerable ease that i may die like a
man if i must die 

but doctor i am yet a young man in the prime of my years youth is a
good subject for a physician to work upon can you do nothing nothing at
all for me doctor 

alas sir replied his physician you have been long in a bad way i
fear i fear nothing in physic can help you 

he was then out of all patience what then is your art sir i have
been a passive machine for a whole twelvemonth to be wrought upon at the
pleasure of you people of the faculty i verily believe had i not taken
such doses of nasty stuff i had been now a well man but who the plague
would regard physicians whose art is to cheat us with hopes while they
help to destroy us and who not one of you know any thing but by
guess 

sir continued he fiercely and with more strength of voice and
coherence than he had shown for several hours before if you give me
over i give you over the only honest and certain part of the art of
healing is surgery a good surgeon is worth a thousand of you i have
been in surgeons' hands often and have always found reason to depend
upon their skill but your art sir what is it but to daub daub 
daub load load load plaster plaster plaster till ye utterly
destroy the appetite first and the constitution afterwards which you
are called in to help i had a companion once my dear belford thou
knewest honest blomer as pretty a physician he would have made as any
in england had he kept himself from excess in wine and women and he
always used to say there was nothing at all but the pick-pocket parade
in the physician's art and that the best guesser was the best physician 
and i used to believe him too and yet fond of life and fearful of
death what do we do when we are taken ill but call ye in and what
do ye do when called in but nurse our distempers till from pigmies you
make giants of them and then ye come creeping with solemn faces when ye
are ashamed to prescribe or when the stomach won't bear its natural
food by reason of your poisonous potions alas i am afraid physic can
do no more for him nor need it when it has brought to the brink of the
grave the poor wretch who placed all his reliance in your cursed slops 
and the flattering hopes you gave him 

the doctor was out of countenance but said if we could make mortal men
immortal and would not all this might be just 

i blamed the poor man yet excused him to the physician to die dear
doctor when like my poor friend we are so desirous of life is a
melancholy thing we are apt to hope too much not considering that the
seeds of death are sown in us when we begin to live and grow up till 
like rampant weeds they choke the tender flower of life which declines
in us as those weeds flourish we ought therefore to begin early to
study what our constitutions will bear in order to root out by
temperance the weeds which the soil is most apt to produce or at
least to keep them down as they rise and not when the flower or plant
is withered at the root and the weed in its full vigour expect that
the medical art will restore the one or destroy the other when that
other as i hinted has been rooting itself in the habit from the time of
our birth 

this speech bob thou wilt call a prettiness but the allegory is just 
and thou hast not quite cured me of the metaphorical 

very true said the doctor you have brought a good metaphor to
illustrate the thing i am sorry i can do nothing for the gentleman and
can only recommend patience and a better frame of mind 

well sir said the poor angry man vexed at the doctor but more at
death you will perhaps recommend the next succession to the physician 
when he can do no more and i suppose will send your brother to pray by
me for those virtues which you wish me 

it seems the physician's brother is a clergyman in the neighbourhood 

i was greatly concerned to see the gentleman thus treated and so i told
poor belton when he was gone but he continued impatient and would not
be denied he said the liberty of talking to a man who had taken so
many guineas of him for doing nothing or worse than nothing and never
declined one though he know all the time he could do him no good 

it seems the gentleman though rich is noted for being greedy after
fees and poor belton went on raving at the extravagant fees of english
physicians compared with those of the most eminent foreign ones but 
poor man he like the turks who judge of a general by his success out
of patience to think he must die would have worshipped the doctor and
not grudged thee times the sum could he have given him hopes of
recovery 

but nevertheless i must needs say that gentlemen of the faculty should
be more moderate in their fees or take more pains to deserve them for 
generally they only come into a room feel the sick man's pulse ask the
nurse a few questions inspect the patient's tongue and perhaps his
water then sit down look plaguy wise and write the golden fee finds
the ready hand and they hurry away as if the sick man's room were
infectious so to the next they troll and to the next if men of great
practice valuing themselves upon the number of visits they make in a
morning and the little time they make them in they go to dinner and
unload their pockets and sally out again to refill them and thus in a
little time they raise vast estates for as ratcliffe said when first
told of a great loss which befell him it was only going up and down one
hundred pairs of stairs to fetch it up 

mrs sambre belton's sister had several times proposed to him a
minister to pray by him but the poor man could not he said bear the
thoughts of one for that he should certainly die in an hour or two
after and he was willing to hope still against all probability that he
might recover and was often asking his sister if she had not seen people
as bad as he was who almost to a miracle when every body gave them
over had got up again 

she shaking her head told him she had but once saying that their
disorders were of an acute kind and such as had a crisis in them he
called her small-hopes and job's comforter and bid her say nothing if
she could not say more to the purpose and what was fitter for a sick man
to hear and yet poor fellow he has no hopes himself as is plain by
his desponding terrors one of which he fell into and a very dreadful
one soon after the doctor went 


 


wednesday nine o'clock at night 

the poor man had been in convulsions terrible convulsions for an hour
past o lord lovelace death is a shocking thing by my faith it is 
i wish thou wert present on this occasion it is not merely the concern
a man has for his friend but as death is the common lot we see in his
agonies how it will be one day with ourselves i am all over as if cold
water were poured down my back or as if i had a strong ague-fit upon me 
i was obliged to come away and i write hardly knowing what i wish
thou wert here 


 


though i left him because i could stay no longer i can't be easy by
myself but must go to him again 


eleven o'clock 

poor belton drawing on apace yet was he sensible when i went in too
sensible poor man he has something upon his mind to reveal he tells
me that is the worst action of his life worse than ever you or i knew
of him he says it must then be very bad 

he ordered every body out but was seized with another convulsion-fit 
before he could reveal it and in it he lies struggling between life and
death but i'll go in again 


one o'clock in the morning 

all now must soon be over with him poor poor fellow he has given me
some hints of what he wanted to say but all incoherent interrupted by
dying hiccoughs and convulsions 

bad enough it must be heaven knows by what i can gather alas 
lovelace i fear i fear he came too soon into his uncle's estate 

if a man were to live always he might have some temptation to do base
things in order to procure to himself as it would then be everlasting
ease plenty or affluence but for the sake of ten twenty thirty
years of poor life to be a villain can that be worth while with a
conscience stinging him all the time too and when he comes to wind up
all such agonizing reflections upon his past guilt all then appearing
as nothing what he most valued most disgustful and not one thing to
think of as the poor fellow says twenty and twenty times over but what
is attended with anguish and reproach 

to hear the poor man wish he had never been born to hear him pray to be
nothing after death good god how shocking 

by his incoherent hints i am afraid tis very bad with him no pardon 
no mercy he repeats can lie for him 

i hope i shall make a proper use of this lesson laugh at me if thou
wilt but never never more will i take the liberties i have taken but
whenever i am tempted will think of belton's dying agonies and what my
own may be 


 


thursday three in the morning 

he is now at the last gasp rattles in the throat has a new convulsion
every minute almost what horror is he in his eyes look like
breath-stained glass they roll ghastly no more are quite set his face
distorted and drawn out by his sinking jaws and erected staring
eyebrows with his lengthened furrowed forehead to double its usual
length as it seems it is not it cannot be the face of belton thy
belton and my belton whom we have beheld with so much delight over the
social bottle comparing notes that one day may be brought against us 
and make us groan as they very lately did him that is to say while he
had strength to groan for now his voice is not to be heard all inward 
lost not so much as speaking by his eyes yet strange how can it be 
the bed rocking under him like a cradle 

four o'clock 

 alas he's gone that groan that dreadful groan 
 was the last farewell of the parting mind 
 the struggling soul has bid a long adieu
 to its late mansion fled ah whither fled 

now is all indeed over poor poor belton by this time thou knowest if
thy crimes were above the size of god's mercies now are every one's
cares and attendance at an end now do we thy friends poor belton 
know the worst of thee as to this life thou art released from
insufferable tortures both of body and mind may those tortures and thy
repentance expiate for thy offences and mayest thou be happy to all
eternity 

we are told that god desires not the death the spiritual death of a
sinner and tis certain that thou didst deeply repent i hope 
therefore as thou wert not cut off in the midst of thy sins by the sword
of injured friendship which more than once thou hadst braved  the
dreadfullest of all deaths next to suicide because it gives no
opportunity for repentance  that this is a merciful earnest that thy
penitence is accepted and that thy long illness and dreadful agonies in
the last stages of it were thy only punishment 

i wish indeed i heartily wish we could have seen one ray of comfort
darting in upon his benighted mind before he departed but all alas 
to the very last gasp was horror and confusion and my only fear arises
from this that till within the four last days of his life he could not
be brought to think he should die though in a visible decline for
months and in that presumption was too little inclined to set about a
serious preparation for a journey which he hoped he should not be
obliged to take and when he began to apprehend that he could not put it
off his impatience and terror and apprehension showed too little of
that reliance and resignation which afford the most comfortable
reflections to the friends of the dying as well as to the dying
themselves 

but we must leave poor belton to that mercy of which we have all so much
need and for my own part do you lovelace and the rest of the
fraternity as ye will i am resolved i will endeavour to begin to
repent of my follies while my health is sound my intellects untouched 
and while it is in my power to make some atonement as near to
restitution or reparation as is possible to those i have wronged or
misled and do ye outwardly and from a point of false bravery make as
light as ye will of my resolution as ye are none of ye of the class of
abandoned and stupid sots who endeavour to disbelieve the future
existence of which ye are afraid i am sure you will justify me in your
hearts if not by your practices and one day you will wish you had
joined with me in the same resolution and will confess there is more
good sense in it than now perhaps you will own 


seven o'clock thursday morning 

you are very earnest by your last letter just given me to hear again
from me before you set out for berks i will therefore close with a few
words upon the only subject in your letter which i can at present touch
upon and this is the letter of which you give me a copy from the lady 

want of rest and the sad scene i have before my eyes have rendered me
altogether incapable of accounting for the contents of it in any shape 
you are in ecstacies upon it you have reason to be so if it be as you
think nor would i rob you of your joy but i must say i am amazed at
it 

surely lovelace this surprising letter cannot be a forgery of thy own 
in order to carry on some view and to impose upon me yet by the style
of it it cannot though thou art a perfect proteus too 

i will not however add another word after i have desired the return of
this and have told you that i am

your true friend and well-wisher 
j belford 



letter xxii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
aug 24 thursday morning 


i received thy letter in such good time by thy fellow's dispatch that
it gives me an opportunity of throwing in a few paragraphs upon it i
read a passage or two of it to mowbray and we both agree that thou art
an absolute master of the lamentable 

poor belton what terrible conflicts were thy last conflicts i hope 
however that he is happy and i have the more hope because the hardness
of his death is likely to be such a warning to thee if it have the
effect thou declarest it shall have what a world of mischief will it
prevent how much good will it do how many poor wretches will rejoice at
the occasion if they know it however melancholy in itself which
shall bring them in a compensation for injuries they had been forced to
sit down contented with but jack though thy uncle's death has made
thee a rich fellow art thou sure that the making good of such a vow will
not totally bankrupt thee 

thou sayest i may laugh at thee if i will not i jack i do not take
it to be a laughing subject and i am heartily concerned at the loss we
all have in poor belton and when i get a little settled and have
leisure to contemplate the vanity of all sublunary things a subject that
will now-and-then in my gayest hours obtrude itself upon me it is very
likely that i may talk seriously with thee upon these topics and if
thou hast not got too much the start of me in the repentance thou art
entering upon will go hand-in-hand with thee in it if thou hast thou
wilt let me just keep thee in my eye for it is an up-hill work and i
shall see thee at setting out at a great distance but as thou art a
much heavier and clumsier fellow than myself i hope that without much
puffing and sweating only keeping on a good round dog-trot i shall be
able to overtake thee 

mean time take back thy letter as thou desirest i would not have it
in my pocket upon any account at present nor read it once more 

i am going down without seeing my beloved i was a hasty fool to write
her a letter promising that i would not come near her till i saw her at
her father's for as she is now actually at smith's and i so near her 
one short visit could have done no harm 

i sent will two hours ago with my grateful compliments and to know
how she does 

how must i adore this charming creature for i am ready to think my
servant a happier fellow than myself for having been within a pair of
stairs and an apartment of her 

mowbray and i will drop a tear a-piece as we ride along to the memory
of poor belton as we ride along said i for we shall have so much joy
when we arrive at lord m s and when i communicate to him and my cousins
the dear creature's letter that we shall forget every thing grievous 
since now their family-hopes in my reformation the point which lies so
near their hearts will all revive it being an article of their faith 
that if i marry repentance and mortification will follow of course 

neither mowbray nor i shall accept of thy verbal invitation to the
funeral we like not these dismal formalities and as to the respect
that is supposed to be shown to the memory of a deceased friend in such
an attendance why should we do any thing to reflect upon those who have
made it a fashion to leave this parade to people whom they hire for that
purpose 

adieu and be cheerful thou canst now do no more for poor belton wert
thou to howl for him to the end of thy life 



letter xxiii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
sat aug 26 


on thursday afternoon i assisted at the opening of poor belton's will in
which he has left me his sole executor and bequeathed me a legacy of an
hundred guineas which i shall present to his unfortunate sister to whom
he has not been so kind as i think he ought to have been he has also
left twenty pounds a-piece to mowbray tourville thyself and me for a
ring to be worn in remembrance of him 

after i had given some particular orders about the preparations to be
made for his funeral i went to town but having made it late before i
got in on thursday night and being fatigued for want of rest several
nights before and now in my spirits  i could not help it lovelace   i
contented myself to send my compliments to the innocent sufferer to
inquire after her health 

my servant saw mrs smith who told him she was very glad i was come to
town for that lady was worse than she had yet been 

it is impossible to account for the contents of her letter to you or to
reconcile those contents to the facts i have to communicate 

i was at smith's by seven yesterday friday morning and found that the
lady was just gone in a chair to st dunstan's to prayers she was too
ill to get out by six to covent-garden church and was forced to be
supported to her chair by mrs lovick they would have persuaded her
against going but she said she knew not but it would be her last
opportunity mrs lovick dreading that she would be taken worse at
church walked thither before her 

mrs smith told me she was so ill on wednesday night that she had
desired to receive the sacrament and accordingly it was administered to
her by the parson of the parish whom she besought to take all
opportunities of assisting her in her solemn preparation 

this the gentleman promised and called in the morning to inquire after
her health and was admitted at the first word he staid with her about
half an hour and when he came down with his face turned aside and a
faltering accent mrs smith  said he you have an angel in your
house i will attend her again in the evening as she desires and as
often as i think it will be agreeable to her 

her increased weakness she attributed to the fatigues she had undergone
by your means and to a letter she had received from her sister which
she answered the same day 

mrs smith told me that two different persons had called there one on
thursday morning one in the evening to inquire after her state of
health and seemed as if commissioned from her relations for that
purpose but asked not to see her only were very inquisitive after her
visiters particularly it seems after me what could they mean by
that after her way of life and expenses and one of them inquired
after her manner of supporting them to the latter of which mrs smith
said she had answered as the truth was that she had been obliged to
sell some of her clothes and was actually about parting with more at
which the inquirist a grave old farmer-looking man held up his hands 
and said good god this will be sad sad news to somebody i believe
i must not mention it but mrs smith says she desired he would let him
come from whom he would he shook his head and said if she died the
flower of the world would be gone and the family she belonged to would
be no more than a common family i was pleased with the man's
expression 


 this man came from her cousin morden as will be seen hereafter 
letters lii and lvi of this volume 


you may be curious to know how she passed her time when she was obliged
to leave her lodging to avoid you 

mrs smith tells me that she was very ill when she went out on monday
morning and sighed as if her heart would break as she came down stairs 
and as she went through the shop into the coach her nurse with her as
you had informed me before that she ordered the coachman whom she hired
for the day to drive any where so it was into the air he accordingly
drove her to hampstead and thence to highgate there at the
bowling-green house she alighted extremely ill and having breakfasted 
ordered the coachman to drive very slowly any where he crept along to
muswell-hill and put up at a public house there where she employed
herself two hours in writing though exceedingly weak and low till the
dinner she had ordered was brought in she endeavoured to eat but could
not her appetite was gone quite gone she said and then she wrote on
for three hours more after which being heavy she dozed a little in an
elbow-chair when she awoke she ordered the coachman to drive her very
slowly to town to the house of a friend of mrs lovick whom as agreed
upon she met there but being extremely ill she would venture home at
a late hour although she heard from the widow that you had been there 
and had reason to be shocked at your behaviour she said she found there
was no avoiding you she was apprehensive she should not live many hours 
and it was not impossible but the shock the sight of you must give her
would determine her fate in your presence 

she accordingly went home she heard the relation of your astonishing
vagaries with hands and eyes often lifted up and with these words
intermingled shocking creature incorrigible wretch and will nothing
make him serious and not being able to bear the thoughts of an
interview with a man so hardened she took to her usual chair early in
the morning and was carried to the temple-stairs where she had ordered
her nurse before her to get a pair of oars in readiness for her
fatigues the day before made her unable to bear a coach and then she
was rowed to chelsea where she breakfasted and after rowing about put
in at the swan at brentford-ait where she dined and would have written 
but had no conveniency either of tolerable pens or ink or private room 
and then proceeding to richmond they rowed her back to mort-lake where
she put in and drank tea at a house her waterman recommended to her 
she wrote there for an hour and returned to the temple and when she
landed made one of the watermen get her a chair and so was carried to
the widow's friend as the night before where she again met the widow 
who informed her that you had been after her twice that day 

mrs lovick gave her there her sister's letter and she was so much
affected with the contents of it that she was twice very nigh fainting
away and wept bitterly as mrs lovick told mrs smith dropping some
warmer expressions than ever they had heard proceed from her lips in
relation to her friends calling them cruel and complaining of ill
offices done her and of vile reports raised against her 


 see letter xxvi of this volume 


while she was thus disturbed mrs smith came to her and told her that
you had been there a third time and was just gone at half an hour
after nine having left word how civil and respectful you would be but
that you was determined to see her at all events 

she said it was hard she could not be permitted to die in peace that
her lot was a severe one that she began to be afraid she should not
forbear repining and to think her punishment greater than her fault 
but recalling herself immediately she comforted herself that her life
would be short and with the assurance of a better 

by what i have mentioned you will conclude with me that the letter
brought her by mrs lovick the superscription of which you saw to be
written in her sister's hand could not be the letter on the contents of
which she grounded that she wrote to you on her return home and yet
neither mrs lovick nor mrs smith nor the servant of the latter know
of any other brought her but as the women assured me that she actually
did write to you i was eased of a suspicion which i had begun to
entertain that you for some purpose i could not guess at had forged
the letter from her of which you sent me a copy 

on wednesday morning when she received your letter in answer to her's 
she said necessity may well be called the mother of invention but
calamity is the test of integrity i hope i have not taken an
inexcusable step and there she stopt a minute or two and then said i
shall now perhaps be allowed to die in peace 

i staid till she came in she was glad to see me but being very weak 
said she must sit down before she could go up stairs and so went into
the back-shop leaning upon mrs lovick and when she had sat down i am
glad to see you mr belford said she i must say so let mis-reporters
say what they will 

i wondered at this expression but would not interrupt her 


 explained in letter xxviii of this volume 


o sir said she i have been grievously harassed your friend who would
not let me live with reputation will not permit me to die in peace you
see how i am is there not a great alteration in me within this week 
but tis all for the better yet were i to wish for life i must say
that your friend your barbarous friend has hurt me greatly 

she was so weak so short breathed and her words and actions so very
moving that i was forced to walk from her the two women and her nurse
turning away their faces also weeping 

i have had madam said i since i saw you a most shocking scene before
my eyes for days together my poor friend belton is no more he quitted
the world yesterday morning in such dreadful agonies that the impression
they have left upon me have so weakened my mind 

i was loth to have her think that my grief was owing to the weak state i
saw her in for fear of dispiriting her 

that is only mr belford interrupted she in order to strengthen it if
a proper use be made of the impression but i should be glad since you
are so humanely affected with the solemn circumstance that you could
have written an account of it to your gay friend in the style and manner
you are master of who knows as it would have come from an associate 
and of an associate it might have affected him 

that i had done i told her in such a manner as had i believed some
effect upon you 

his behaviour in this honest family so lately said she and his cruel
pursuit of me give me but little hope that any thing serious or solemn
will affect him 

we had some talk about belton's dying behaviour and i gave her several
particulars of the poor man's impatience and despair to which she was
very attentive and made fine observations upon the subject of
procrastination 

a letter and packet were brought her by a man on horseback from miss
howe while we were talking she retired up stairs to read it and while
i was in discourse with mrs smith and mrs lovick the doctor and
apothecary both came in together they confirmed to me my fears as to
the dangerous way she is in they had both been apprized of the new
instances of implacableness in her friends and of your persecutions and
the doctor said he would not for the world be either the unforgiving
father of that lady or the man who had brought her to this distress 
her heart's broken she'll die said he there is no saving her but
how were i either the one or the other of the people i have named i
should support myself afterwards i cannot tell 

when she was told we were all three together she desired us to walk up 
she arose to receive us and after answering two or three general
questions relating to her health she addressed herself to us to the
following effect 

as i may not said she see you three gentlemen together again let me
take this opportunity to acknowledge my obligations to you all i am
inexpressibly obliged to you sir and to you sir  courtesying to the
doctor and to mr goddard  for your more than friendly your paternal
care and concern for me humanity in your profession i dare say is far
from being a rare qualification because you are gentlemen by your
profession but so much kindness so much humanity did never desolate
creature meet with as i have met with from you both but indeed i have
always observed that where a person relies upon providence it never
fails to raise up a new friend for every old one that falls off 

this gentleman  bowing to me   who some people think should have been
one of the last i should have thought of for my executor is 
nevertheless such is the strange turn that things have taken the only
one i can choose and therefore i have chosen him for that charitable
office and he has been so good as to accept of it for rich as i may
boast myself to be i am rather so in right than in fact at this
present i repeat therefore my humble thanks to you all three and beg
of god to return to you and yours  looking to each  an hundred-fold the
kindness and favour you have shown me and that it may be in the power of
you and of yours to the end of time to confer benefits rather than to
be obliged to receive them this is a godlike power gentlemen i once
rejoiced in it some little degree and much more in the prospect i had of
its being enlarged to me though i have had the mortification to
experience the reverse and to be obliged almost to every body i have
seen or met with but all originally through my own fault so i ought
to bear the punishment without repining and i hope i do forgive these
impertinencies a grateful heart that wants the power it wishes for to
express itself suitably to its own impulses will be at a loss what
properly to dictate to the tongue and yet unable to restrain its
overflowings will force the tongue to say weak and silly things rather
than appear ungratefully silent once more then i thank ye all three
for your kindness to me and god almighty make you that amends which at
present i cannot 

she retired from us to her closet with her eyes full and left us looking
upon one another 

we had hardly recovered ourselves when she quite easy cheerful and
smiling returned to us doctor said she seeing we had been moved you
will excuse me for the concern i give you and so will you mr goddard 
and you mr belford for tis a concern that only generous natures can
show and to such natures sweet is the pain if i may say so that
attends such a concern but as i have some few preparations still to
make and would not though in ease of mr belford's future cares which
is and ought to be part of my study undertake more than it is likely i
shall have time lent me to perform i would beg of you to give me your
opinions  you see my way of living and you may be assured that i will do
nothing wilfully to shorten my life  how long it may possibly be before
i may hope to be released from all my troubles 

they both hesitated and looked upon each other don't be afraid to
answer me said she each sweet hand pressing upon the arm of each
gentleman with that mingled freedom and reserve which virgin modesty 
mixed with conscious dignity can only express and with a look serenely
earnest tell me how long you think i may hold it and believe me 
gentlemen the shorter you tell me my time is likely to be the more
comfort you will give me 

with what pleasing woe said the doctor do you fill the minds of those
who have the happiness to converse with you and see the happy frame you
are in what you have undergone within a few days past has much hurt you 
and should you have fresh troubles of those kinds i could not be
answerable for your holding it and there he paused 

how long doctor i believe i shall have a little more ruffling i am
afraid i shall but there can happen only one thing that i shall not be
tolerably easy under how long then sir 

he was silent 

a fortnight sir 

he was still silent 

ten days a week how long sir with smiling earnestness 

if i must speak madam if you have not better treatment than you have
lately met with i am afraid there again he stopt 

afraid of what doctor don't be afraid how long sir 

that a fortnight or three weeks may deprive the world of the finest
flower in it 

a fortnight or three weeks yet doctor but god's will be done i
shall however by this means have full time if i have but strength
and intellect to do all that is now upon my mind to do and so sirs 
i can but once more thank you  turning to each of us  for all your
goodness to me and having letters to write will take up no more of
your time only doctor be pleased to order me some more of those drops 
they cheer me a little when i am low and putting a fee into his
unwilling hand you know the terms sir then turning to mr goddard 
you'll be so good sir as to look in upon me to-night or to-morrow as
you have opportunity and you mr belford i know will be desirous to
set out to prepare for the last office for your late friend so i wish
you a good journey and hope to see you when that is performed 

she then retired with a cheerful and serene air the two gentlemen
went away together i went down to the women and inquiring found 
that mrs lovick was this day to bring her twenty guineas more for some
other of her apparel 

the widow told me that she had taken the liberty to expostulate with her
upon the occasion she had for raising this money to such great
disadvantage and it produced the following short and affecting
conversation between them 

none of my friends will wear any thing of mine said she i shall leave
a great many good things behind me and as to what i want the money for
 don't be surprised but suppose i want it to purchase a house 

you are all mystery madam i don't comprehend you 

why then mrs lovick i will explain myself i have a man not a
woman for my executor and think you that i will leave to his care any
thing that concerns my own person now mrs lovick smiling do you
comprehend me 

mrs lovick wept 

o fie proceeded the lady drying up her tears with her own handkerchief 
and giving her a kiss why this kind weakness for one with whom you have
been so little while acquainted dear good mrs lovick don't be
concerned for me on a prospect with which i have occasion to be pleased 
but go to-morrow to your friends and bring me the money they have agreed
to give you 

thus lovelace it is plain she means to bespeak her last house here's
presence of mind here's tranquillity of heart on the most affecting
occasion this is magnanimity indeed couldst thou or could i with all
our boisterous bravery and offensive false courage act thus poor
belton how unlike was thy behaviour 

mrs lovick tells me that the lady spoke of a letter she had received
from her favourite divine dr lewen in the time of my absence and of an
letter she had returned to it but mrs lovick knows not the contents of
either 

when thou receivest the letter i am now writing thou wilt see what will
soon be the end of all thy injuries to this divine lady i say when thou
receivest it for i will delay it for some little time lest thou
shouldest take it into thy head under pretence of resenting the
disappointment her letter must give thee to molest her again 

this letter having detained me by its length i shall not now set out for
epsom till to-morrow 

i should have mentioned that the lady explained to me what the one thing
was that she was afraid might happen to ruffle her it was the
apprehension of what may result from a visit which col morden as she is
informed designs to make you 



letter xxiv

the rev dr lewen to miss cl harlowe
friday aug 18 


presuming dearest and ever-respectable young lady upon your former
favour and upon your opinion of my judgment and sincerity i cannot help
addressing you by a few lines on your present unhappy situation 

i will not look back upon the measures into which you have either been
led or driven but will only say as to those that i think you are the
least to blame of any young lady that was ever reduced from happy to
unhappy circumstances and i have not been wanting to say as much where
i hoped my freedom would have been better received than i have had the
mortification to find it to be 

what i principally write for now is to put you upon doing a piece of
justice to yourself and to your sex in the prosecuting for his life i
am assured his life is in your power the most profligate and abandoned
of men as he must be who could act so basely as i understand mr 
lovelace has acted by you 

i am very ill and am now forced to write upon my pillow my thoughts
confused and incapable of method i shall not therefore aim at method 
but to give you in general my opinion and that is that your religion 
your duty to your family the duty you owe to your honour and even
charity to your sex oblige you to give public evidence against this very
wicked man 

and let me add another consideration the prevention by this means of
the mischiefs that may otherwise happen between your brother and mr 
lovelace or between the latter and your cousin morden who is now i
hear arrived and resolves to have justice done you 

a consideration which ought to affect your conscience  forgive me 
dearest young lady i think i am now in the way of my duty   and to be
of more concern to you than that hard pressure upon your modesty which
i know the appearance against him in an open court must be of to such a
lady as you and which i conceive will be your great difficulty but i
know madam that you have dignity enough to become the blushes of the
most naked truth when necessity justice and honour exact it from you 
rakes and ravishers would meet with encouragement indeed and most from
those who had the greatest abhorrence of their actions if violated
modesty were never to complain of the injury it received from the
villanous attempters of it 

in a word the reparation of your family dishonour now rests in your own
bosom and which only one of these two alternatives can repair to wit 
either to marry the offender or to prosecute him at law bitter
expedients for a soul so delicate as your's 

he and all his friends i understand solicit you to the first and it
is certainly now all the amends within his power to make but i am
assured that you have rejected their solicitations and his with the
indignation and contempt that his foul actions have deserved but yet 
that you refuse not to extend to him the christian forgiveness he has so
little reason to expect provided he will not disturb you farther 

but madam the prosecution i advise will not let your present and
future exemption from fresh disturbance from so vile a molester depend
upon his courtesy i should think so noble and so rightly-guided a spirit
as your's would not permit that it should if you could help it 

and can indignities of any kind be properly pardoned till we have it in
our power to punish them to pretend to pardon while we are labouring
under the pain or dishonour of them will be thought by some to be but
the vaunted mercy of a pusillanimous heart trembling to resent them 
the remedy i propose is a severe one but what pain can be more severe
than the injury or how will injuries be believed to grieve us that are
never honourably complained of 

i am sure miss clarissa harlowe however injured and oppressed remains
unshaken in her sentiments of honour and virtue and although she would
sooner die than deserve that her modesty should be drawn into question 
yet she will think no truth immodest that is to be uttered in the
vindicated cause of innocence and chastity little very little
difference is there my dear young lady between a suppressed evidence 
and a false one 

it is a terrible circumstance i once more own for a young lady of your
delicacy to be under the obligation of telling so shocking a story in
public court but it is still a worse imputation that she should pass
over so mortal an injury unresented 

conscience honour justice are on your side and modesty would by
some be thought but an empty name should you refuse to obey their
dictates 

i have been consulted i own on this subject i have given it as my
opinion that you ought to prosecute the abandoned man but without my
reasons these i reserved with a resolution to lay them before you
unknown to any body that the result if what i wish may be your own 

i will only add that the misfortunes which have befallen you had they
been the lot of a child of my own could not have affected me more than
your's have done my own child i love but i both love and honour you 
since to love you is to love virtue good sense prudence and every
thing that is good and noble in woman 

wounded as i think all these are by the injuries you have received you
will believe that the knowledge of your distresses must have afflicted 
beyond what i am able to express 

your sincere admirer and humble servant 
arthur lewen 


i just now understand that your sister will by proper authority propose
 this prosecution to you i humbly presume that the reason why you
 resolved not upon this step from the first was that you did not
 know that it would have the countenance and support of your
 relations 



letter xxv

miss cl harlowe to the rev dr lewen
sat aug 19 


reverend and dear sir 

i thought till i received your affectionate and welcome letter that i
had neither father uncle brother left nor hardly a friend among my
former favourers of your sex yet knowing you so well and having no
reason to upbraid myself with a faulty will i was to blame even
although i had doubted the continuance of your good opinion to decline
the trial whether i had forfeited it or not and if i had whether i
could not honourably reinstate myself in it 

but sir it was owing to different causes that i did not partly to
shame to think how high in my happier days i stood in your esteem and
how much i must be sunk in it since those so much nearer in relation to
me gave me up partly to deep distress which makes the humbled heart
diffident and made mine afraid to claim the kindred mind in your's 
which would have supplied to me in some measure all the dear and lost
relations i have named 

then so loth as i sometimes was to be thought to want to make a party
against those whom both duty and inclination bid me reverence so long
trailed on between hope and doubt so little my own mistress at one time 
so fearful of making or causing mischief at another and not being
encouraged to hope by your kind notice that my application to you would
be acceptable apprehending that my relations had engaged your silence
at least these but why these unavailing retrospections now i was to
be unhappy in order to be happy that is my hope resigning therefore
to that hope i will without any further preamble write a few lines 
 if writing to you i can write but a few in answer to the subject of
your kind letter 


 the stiff visit this good divine was prevailed upon to make her as
mentioned in vol ii letter xxxi of which however she was too
generous to remind him might warrant the lady to think that he had
rather inclined to their party as to the parental side than to her's 


permit me then to say that i believe your arguments would have been
unanswerable in almost every other case of this nature but in that of
the unhappy clarissa harlowe 

it is certain that creatures who cannot stand the shock of public shame 
should be doubly careful how they expose themselves to the danger of
incurring private guilt which may possibly bring them to it but as to
myself suppose there were no objections from the declining way i am in
as to my health and supposing i could have prevailed upon myself to
appear against this man were there not room to apprehend that the end so
much wished for by my friends to wit his condign punishment would
not have been obtained when it came to be seen that i had consented to
give him a clandestine meeting and in consequence of that had been
weakly tricked out of living under one roof with him for several weeks 
which i did not only without complaint but without cause of
complaint 

little advantage in a court perhaps bandied about and jested
profligately with would some of those pleas in my favour have been 
which out of court and to a private and serious audience would have
carried the greatest weight against him such particularly as the
infamous methods to which he had recourse 

it would no doubt have been a ready retort from every mouth that i
ought not to have thrown myself into the power of such a man and that i
ought to take for my pains what had befallen me 

but had the prosecution been carried on to effect and had he even been
sentenced to death can it be supposed that his family would not have had
interest enough to obtain his pardon for a crime thought too lightly of 
though one of the greatest that can be committed against a creature
valuing her honour above her life while i had been censured as pursuing
with sanguinary views a man who offered me early all the reparation in
his power to make 

and had he been pardoned would he not then have been at liberty to do as
much mischief as ever 

i dare say sir such is the assurance of the man upon whom my unhappy
destiny threw me and such his inveteracy to my family which would then
have appeared to be justified by their known inveteracy to him and by
their earnest endeavours to take away his life that he would not have
been sorry to have had an opportunity to confront me and my father 
uncles and brother at the bar of a court of justice on such an
occasion in which case would not on his acquittal or pardon 
resentments have been reciprocally heightened and then would my
brother or my cousin morden have been more secure than now 

how do these conditions aggravate my fault my motives at first were
not indeed blamable but i had forgotten the excellent caution which yet
i was not ignorant of that we ought not to do evil that good may come of
it 

in full conviction of the purity of my heart and of the firmness of my
principles  why may i not thus called upon say what i am conscious of 
and yet without the imputation of faulty pride since all is but a duty 
and i should be utterly inexcusable could i not justly say what i do 
in this full conviction   he has offered me marriage he has avowed his
penitence a sincere penitence i have reason to think it though perhaps
not a christian one and his noble relations kinder to the poor
sufferer than her own on the same conviction and his own not
ungenerous acknowledgements have joined to intercede with me to forgive
and accept of him although i cannot comply with the latter part of
their intercession have not you sir from the best rules and from the
divinest example taught me to forgive injuries 

the injury i have received from him is indeed of the highest nature and
it was attended with circumstances of unmanly baseness and premeditation 
yet i bless god it has not tainted my mind it has not hurt my morals 
no thanks indeed to the wicked man that it has not no vile courses have
followed it my will is unviolated the evil respecting myself and
not my friends is merely personal no credulity no weakness no want
of vigilance have i to reproach myself with i have through grace 
triumphed over the deepest machinations i have escaped from him i
have renounced him the man whom once i could have loved i have been
enabled to despise and shall not charity complete my triumph and shall
i not enjoy it and where would be my triumph if he deserved my
forgiveness poor man he has had a loss in losing me i have the pride
to think so because i think i know my own heart i have had none in
losing him 

but i have another plea to make which alone would have been enough as i
presume to answer the contents of your very kind and friendly letter 

i know my dear and reverend friend the spiritual guide and director of
my happier days i know that you will allow of my endeavour to bring
myself to this charitable disposition when i tell you how near i think
myself to that great and awful moment in which and even in the ardent
preparation to which every sense of indignity or injury that concerns
not the immortal soul ought to be absorbed in higher and more important
contemplations 

thus much for myself 

and for the satisfaction of my friends and favourers miss howe is
solicitous to have all those letters and materials preserved which will
set my whole story in a true light the good dr lewen is one of the
principal of those friends and favourers 

the warning that may be given from those papers to all such young
creatures as may have known or heard of me may be of more efficacy to
the end wished for as i humbly presume to think than my appearance
could have been in a court of justice pursuing a doubtful event under
the disadvantages i have mentioned and if my dear and good sir you
are now on considering every thing of this opinion and i could know
it i should consider it as a particular felicity being as solicitous
as ever to be justified in what i may in your eyes 

i am sorry sir that your indisposition has reduced you to the necessity
of writing upon your pillow but how much am i obliged to that kind and
generous concern for me which has impelled you as i may say to write a
letter containing so many paternal lines with such inconvenience to
yourself 

may the almighty bless you dear and reverend sir for all your goodness
to me of long time past as well as for that which engaged my present
gratitude continue to esteem me to the last as i do and will venerate
you and let me bespeak your prayers the continuance i should say of
your prayers for i doubt not that i have always had them and to them 
perhaps has in part been owing as well as to your pious precepts
instilled through my earlier youth that i have been able to make the
stand i have made although every thing that you prayed for has not been
granted to me by that divine wisdom which knows what is best for its
poor creatures 

my prayers for you are that it will please god to restore you to your
affectionate flock and after as many years of life as shall be for his
service and to your own comfort give us a happy meeting in those
regions of blessedness which you have taught me as well by example as
by precept to aspire to 

clarissa harlowe 



letter xxvi

miss arab harlowe to miss cl harlowe
 in answer to her's to her uncle antony of aug 13  
monday aug 21 


 see letter iv of this volume 


sister clary 

i find by your letters to my uncles that they as well as i are in
great disgrace with you for writing our minds to you 

we can't help it sister clary 

you don't think it worth your while i find a second time to press for
the blessing you pretend to be so earnest about you think no doubt 
that you have done your duty in asking for it so you'll sit down
satisfied with that i suppose and leave it to your wounded parents to
repent hereafter that they have not done theirs in giving it to you at
the first word and in making such inquiries about you as you think
ought to have been made fine encouragement to inquire after a run-away
daughter living with her fellow as long as he would live with her you
repent also with your full mind as you modestly call it that you wrote
to me 

so we are not likely to be applied to any more i find in this way 

well then since this is the case sister clary let me with all
humility address myself with a proposal or two to you to which you will
be graciously pleased to give an answer 

now you must know that we have had hints given us from several
quarters that you have been used in such a manner by the villain you ran
away with that his life would be answerable for his crime if it were
fairly to be proved and by your own hints something like it appears
to us 

if clary there be any thing but jingle and affected period in what
proceeds from your full mind and your dutiful consciousness and if
there be truth in what mrs norton and mrs howe have acquainted us with 
you may yet justify your character to us and to the world in every
thing but your scandalous elopement and the law may reach the villain 
and could we but bring him to the gallows what a meritorious revenge
would that be to our whole injured family and to the innocents he has
deluded as well as the saving from ruin many others 

let me therefore know if you please whether you are willing to appear
to do yourself and us and your sex this justice if not sister
clary we shall know what to think of you for neither you nor we can
suffer more than we have done from the scandal of your fall and if you
will mr ackland and counselor derham will both attend you to make
proper inquiries and to take minutes of your story to found a process
upon if it will bear one with as great a probability of success as we
are told it may be prosecuted with 

but by what mrs howe intimates this is not likely to be complied with 
for it is what she hinted to you it seems by her lively daughter but
not without effect so prudently in some certain points as to entitle
yourself to public justice which if true the lord have mercy upon you 


 see vol vi letter lxxii 


one word only more as to the above proposal your admirer dr lewen is
clear in his opinion that you should prosecute the villain 

but if you will not agree to this i have another proposal to make to
you and that in the name of every one in the family which is that you
will think of going to pensylvania to reside there for some few years
till all is blown over and if it please god to spare you and your
unhappy parents till they can be satisfied that you behave like a true
and uniform penitent at least till you are one-and-twenty you may then
come back to your own estate or have the produce of it sent you thither 
as you shall choose a period which my father fixes because it is the
custom and because he thinks your grandfather should have fixed it and
because let me add you have fully proved by your fine conduct that you
were not at years of discretion at eighteen poor doting though good
old man your grandfather he thought but i would not be too severe 

mr hartley has a widow-sister at pensylvania with whom he will
undertake you may board and who is a sober sensible well-read woman 
and if you were once well there it would rid your father and mother of
a world of cares and fears and scandal and that i think is what you
should wish for of all things 

mr hartley will engage for all accommodations in your passage suitable
to your rank and fortune and he has a concern in a ship which will sail
in a month and you may take your secret-keeping hannah with you or whom
you will of your newer acquaintance tis presumed that your companions
will be of your own sex 

these are what i had to communicate to you and if you'll oblige me with
an answer which the hand that conveys this will call for on wednesday
morning it will be very condescending 

arabella harlowe 



letter xxvii

miss cl harlowe to miss arab harlowe
tuesday aug 22 


write to me my hard-hearted sister in what manner you please i shall
always be thankful to you for your notice but think what you will of
me i cannot see mr ackland and the counselor on such a business as you
mention 

the lord have mercy upon me indeed for none else will 

surely i am believed to a creature past all shame or it could not be
thought of sending two gentlemen to me on such an errand 

had my mother required of me or would modesty have permitted you to
inquire into the particulars of my sad story or had mrs norton been
directed to receive them from me methinks it had been more fit and i
presume to think that it would have been more in every one's character
too had they been required of me before such heavy judgment had been
passed upon me as has been passed 

i know that this is dr lewen's opinion he has been so good as to
enforce it in a kind letter to me i have answered his letter and given
such reasons as i hope will satisfy him i could wish it were thought
worth while to request of him a sight of my answer 


 her letter containing the reasons she refers to was not asked for 
and dr lewen's death which fell out soon after he had received it was
the reason that it was not communicated to the family till it was too
late to do the service that might have been hoped for from it 


to your other proposal of going to pensylvania this is my answer if
nothing happen within a month which may full as effectually rid my
parents and friends of that world of cares and fears and scandals 
which you mention and if i am then able to be carried on board of ship 
i will cheerfully obey my father and mother although i were sure to die
in the passage and if i may be forgiven for saying so for indeed it
proceeds not from a spirit of reprisal you shall set over me instead of
my poor obliging but really-unculpable hannah your betty barnes to
whom i will be answerable for all my conduct and i will make it worth
her while to accompany me 

i am equally surprised and concerned at the hints which both you and my
uncle antony give of new points of misbehaviour in me what can be meant
by them 

i will not tell you miss harlowe how much i am afflicted at your
severity and how much i suffer by it and by your hard-hearted levity of
style because what i shall say may be construed into jingle and period 
and because i know it is intended very possibly for kind ends to
mortify me all i will therefore say is that it does not lose its end 
if that be it 

but nevertheless divesting myself as much as possible of all
resentment i will only pray that heaven will give you for your own
sake a kinder heart than at present you seem to have since a kind
heart i am convinced is a greater blessing to its possessor than it can
be to any other person under this conviction i subscribe myself my
dear bella 

your ever-affectionate sister 
cl harlowe 



letter xxviii

mrs norton to miss clarissa harlowe
 in answer to her's of thursday aug 17  
tuesday aug 22 


 see letter vi of this volume 


my dearest young lady 

the letters you sent me i now return by the hand that brings you this 

it is impossible for me to express how much i have been affected by them 
and by your last of the 17th indeed my dear miss clary you are very
harshly used indeed you are and if you should be taken from us what
grief and what punishment are not treasuring up against themselves in the
heavy reflections which their rash censures and unforgivingness will
occasion them 

but i find to what your uncle antony's cruel letter is owing as well as
one you will be still more afflicted by  god help you my poor dear
child   when it comes to your hand written by your sister with
proposals to you 


 see letter xxvi ibid 


it was finished to send you yesterday i know and i apprize you of it 
that you should fortify your heart against the contents of it 

the motives which incline them all to this severity if well grounded 
would authorize any severity they could express and which while they
believe them to be so both they and you are to be equally pitied 

they are owning to the information of that officious mr brand who has
acquainted them from some enemy of your's in the neighbourhood about
you that visits are made you highly censurable by a man of a free
character and an intimate of mr lovelace who is often in private with
you sometimes twice or thrice a day 

betty gives herself great liberties of speech upon this occasion and all
your friends are too ready to believe that things are not as they should
be which makes me wish that let the gentleman's views be ever so
honourable you could entirely drop acquaintance with him 

something of this nature was hinted at by betty to me before but so
darkly that i could not tell what to make of it and this made me mention
to you so generally as i did in my last 

your cousin morden has been among them he is exceedingly concerned for
your misfortunes and as they will not believe mr lovelace would marry
you he is determined to go to lord m s in order to inform himself from
mr lovelace's own mouth whether he intends to do you that justice or
not 

he was extremely caressed by every one at his first arrival but i am
told there is some little coldness between them and him at present 

i was in hopes of getting a sight of this letter of mr brand a rash
officious man but it seems mr morden had it given him yesterday to
read and he took it away with him 

god be your comfort my dear miss but indeed i am exceedingly disturbed
at the thoughts of what may still be the issue of all these things i
am my beloved young lady 

your most affectionate and faithful
judith norton 



letter xxix

mrs norton to miss clarissa harlowe
tuesday aug 22 


after i had sealed up the enclosed i had the honour of a private visit
from your aunt hervey who has been in a very low-spirited way and kept
her chamber for several weeks past and is but just got abroad 

she longed she said to see me and to weep with me on the hard fate
that had befallen her beloved niece 

i will give you a faithful account of what passed between us as i expect
that it will upon the whole administer hope and comfort to you 

she pitied very much your good mother who she assured me is obliged
to act a part entirely contrary to her inclinations as she herself she
owns had been in a great measure 

she said that the poor lady was with great difficulty with-held from
answering your letter to her which had as was your aunt's expression 
almost broken the heart of every one that she had reason to think that
she was neither consenting to your two uncles writing nor approving of
what they wrote 

she is sure they all love you dearly but have gone so far that they
know not how to recede 

that but for the abominable league which your brother had got every
body into he refusing to set out for scotland till it was renewed and
till they had all promised to take no step towards a reconciliation in
his absence but by his consent and to which your sister's resentments
kept them up all would before now have happily subsided 

that nobody knew the pangs which their inflexible behaviour gave them 
ever since you had begun to write to them in so affecting and humble a
style 

that however they were not inclined to believe that you were either so
ill or so penitent as you really are and still less that mr lovelace
is in earnest in his offers of marriage 

she is sure however she says that all will soon be well and the
sooner for mr morden's arrival who is very zealous in your behalf 

she wished to heaven that you would accept of mr lovelace wicked as he
has been if he were now in earnest 

it had always  she said been matter of astonishment to her that so
weak a pride in her cousin james of making himself the whole family 
should induce them all to refuse an alliance with such a family as mr 
lovelace's was 

she would have it that your going off with mr lovelace was the
unhappiest step for your honour and your interest that could have been
taken for that although you would have had a severe trial the next day 
yet it would probably have been the last and your pathetic powers must
have drawn you off some friends hinting at your mother at your uncle
harlowe at your uncle hervey and herself 

but here that the regret that you did not trust to the event of that
meeting may not in your present low way too much afflict you i must
observe that it seems a little too evident even from this opinion of
your aunt's that it was not absolutely determined that all compulsion
was designed to be avoided since your freedom from it must have been
owing to the party to be made among them by your persuasive eloquence and
dutiful expostulation 

she owned that some of them were as much afraid of meeting you as you
could be of meeting them  but why so if they designed in the last
instance to give you your way 

your aunt told me that mrs williams had been with her and asked her
opinion if it would be taken amiss if she desired leave to go up to
attend her dearest young lady in her calamity your aunt referred her to
your mother but had heard no more of it 


 the former housekeeper at harlowe-place 


her daughter  miss dolly she said had been frequently earnest with
her on the same subject and renewed her request with the greatest
fervour when your first letter came to hand 

your aunt says that she then being very ill wrote to your mother upon
it hoping it would not be taken amiss if she permitted dolly to go but
that your sister as from your mother answered her that now you seemed
to be coming-to and to have a due sense of your faults you must be left
entirely to their own management 

miss dolly  she said had pined ever since she had heard of mr 
lovelace's baseness being doubly mortified by it first on account of
your sufferings next because she was one who rejoiced in your getting
off and vindicated you for it and had incurred censure and ill-will on
that account especially from your brother and sister so that she seldom
went to harlowe-place 

make the best use of these intelligences my dearest young lady for your
consolation 

i will only add that i am with the most fervent prayers for your
recovery and restoration to favour 

your ever-faitful
judith norton 



letter xxx

miss cl harlowe to mrs judith norton
thursday aug 24 


the relation of such a conversation as passed between my aunt and you
would have given me pleasure had it come some time ago because it would
have met with a spirit more industrious than mine now is to pick out
remote comfort in the hope of a favourable turn that might one day have
rewarded my patient duty 

i did not doubt my aunt't good-will to me her affection i did not
doubt but shall we wonder that kings and princes meet with so little
controul in their passions be they every so violent when in a private
family an aunt nay even a mother in that family shall choose to give
up a once-favoured child against their own inclinations rather than
oppose an aspiring young man who had armed himself with the authority of
a father who when once determined never would be expostulated with 

and will you not blame me if i say that good sense that kindred
indulgence must be a little offended at the treatment i have met with 
and if i own that i think that great rigour has been exercised towards
me and yet i am now authorized to call it rigour by the judgment of two
excellent sisters my mother and my aunt who acknowledge as you tell me
from my aunt that they have been obliged to join against me contrary to
their inclinations and that even in a point which might seem to concern
my eternal welfare 

but i must not go on at this rate for may not the inclination my mother
has given up be the effect of a too-fond indulgence rather than that i
merit the indulgence and yet so petulantly perverse am i that i must
tear myself from the subject 

all then that i will say further to it at this time is that were the
intended goodness to be granted to me but a week hence it would possibly
be too late too late i mean to be of the consolation to me that i would
wish from it for what an inefficacious preparation must i have been
making if it has not by this time carried me above but above what 
poor mistaken creature unhappy self-deluder that finds herself above
nothing nor able to subdue her own faulty impatience 

but in-deed to have done with a subject that i dare not trust myself
with if it come in your way let my aunt hervey let my dear cousin
dolly let the worthy mrs williams know how exceedingly grateful to me
their kind intentions and concern for me are and as the best warrant
or justification of their good opinions since i know that their favour
for me is founded on the belief that i loved virtue tell them that i
continued to love virtue to my last hour as i presume to hope it may be
said and assure them that i never made the least wilful deviation 
however unhappy i became for one faulty step which nevertheless was not
owing to unworthy or perverse motives 

i am very sorry that my cousin morden has taken a resolution to see mr 
lovelace 

my apprehensions on this intelligence are a great abatement to the
pleasure i have in knowing that he still loves me 

my sister's letter to me is a most affecting one so needlessly so
ludicrously taunting but for that part of it that is so i ought rather
to pity her than to be so much concerned at it as i am 

i wonder what i have done to mr brand i pray god to forgive both him
and his informants whoever they be but if the scandal arise solely
from mr belford's visits a very little time will confute it mean
while the packet i shall send you which i sent to miss howe will i
hope satisfy you my dear mrs norton as to my reasons for admitting
his visits 

my sister's taunting letter and the inflexibleness of my dearer friends
 but how do remoter-begun subjects tend to the point which lies nearest
the heart as new-caught bodily disorders all crowd to a fractured or
distempered part 

i will break off with requesting your prayers that i may be blessed with
patience and due resignation and with assuring you that i am and will
be to the last hour of my life 

your equally grateful and affectionate
cl harlowe 



letter xxxi

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
 in reply to her's of friday aug 11  
yarmouth isle of wight aug 23 


 see letter ii of this volume 


my dearest friend 

i have read the letters and copies of letters you favoured me with and i
return them by a particular hand i am extremely concerned at your
indifferent state of health but i approve of all your proceedings and
precautions in relation to the appointment of mr belford for an office 
in which i hope neither he nor any body else will be wanted to act for
many very many years 

i admire and so we do all that greatness of mind which can make you so
stedfastly  sic  despise through such inducements as no other woman
could resist and in such desolate circumstances as you have been reduced
to the wretch that ought to be so heartily despised and detested 

what must the contents of those letters from your relations be which you
will not communicate to me fie upon them how my heart rises but i
dare say no more though you yourself now begin to think they use you
with great severity 

every body here is so taken with mr hickman and the more from the
horror they conceive at the character of the detestable lovelace that i
have been teased to death almost to name a day this has given him airs 
and did i not keep him to it he would behave as carelessly and as
insolently as if he were sure of me i have been forced to mortify him
no less than four times since we have been here 

i made him lately undergo a severe penance for some negligences that were
not to be passed over not designed ones he said but that was a poor
excuse as i told him for had they been designed he should never have
come into my presence more that they were not showed his want of
thought and attention and those were inexcusable in a man only in his
probatory state 

he hoped he had been more than in a probatory state he said 

and therefore sir might be more careless so you add ingratitude to
negligence and make what you plead as accident that itself wants an
excuse design which deserves none 

i would not see him for two days and he was so penitent and so humble 
that i had like to have lost myself to make him amends for as you have
said resentment carried too high often ends in amends too humble 

i long to be nearer to you but that must not yet be it seems pray my
dear let me hear from you as often as you can 

may heaven increase your comforts and restore your health are the
prayers of

your ever faithful and affectionate
anna howe 


p s excuse me that i did not write before it was owing to a little
 coasting voyage i was obliged to give into 



letter xxxii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
friday aug 25 


you are very obliging my dear miss howe to account to me for your
silence i was easy in it as i doubted not that among such near and
dear friends as you are with you was diverted from writing by some such
agreeable excursion as that you mention 

i was in hopes that you had given over at this time of day those very
sprightly airs which i have taken the liberty to blame you for as often
as you have given me occasion to so do and that has been very often 

i was always very grave with you upon this subject and while your own
and a worthy man's future happiness are in the question i must enter
into it whenever you forget yourself although i had not a day to live 
and indeed i am very ill 

i am sure it was not your intention to take your future husband with you
to the little island to make him look weak and silly among those of your
relations who never before had seen him yet do you think it possible
for them however prepared and resolved they may be to like him to
forbear smiling at him when they see him suffering under your whimsical
penances a modest man should no more be made little in his own eyes 
than in the eyes of others if he be he will have a diffidence which
will give an awkwardness to every thing he says or does and this will be
no more to the credit of your choice than to that of the approbation he
meets with from your friends or to his own credit 

i love an obliging and even an humble deportment in a man to the woman
he addresses it is a mark of his politeness and tends to give her that
opinion of herself which it may be supposed bashful merit wants to be
inspired with but if the woman exacts it with an high hand she shows
not either her own politeness or gratitude although i must confess she
does her courage i gave you expectations that i would be very serious
with you 

o my dear that it had been my lot as i was not permitted to live
single to have met with a man by whom i could have acted generously and
unreservedly 

mr lovelace it is now plain in order to have a pretence against me 
taxed my behaviour to him with stiffness and distance you at one time 
thought me guilty of some degree of prudery difficult situations should
be allowed for which often make seeming occasions for censure
unavoidable i deserved not blame from him who made mine difficult and
you my dear had i any other man to deal with or had he but half the
merit which mr hickman has would have found that my doctrine on this
subject should have governed my practice 

but to put myself out of the question i'll tell you what i should think 
were i an indifferent by-stander of those high airs of your's in return
for mr hickman's humble demeanour the lady thinks of having the
gentleman i see plainly would i say but i see as plainly that she
has a very great indifference to him and to what may this indifference
be owing to one or all of these considerations no doubt that she
receives his addresses rather from motives of convenience than choice 
that she thinks meanly of his endowments and intellects at least more
highly of her own or she has not the generosity to use that power with
moderation which his great affection for her puts into her hands 

how would you like my dear to have any of these things said 

then to give but the shadow of a reason for free-livers and free speakers
to say or to imagine that miss howe gives her hand to a man who has no
reason to expect any share in her heart i am sure you would not wish
that such a thing should be so much as supposed then all the regard
from you to come afterwards none to be shown before must should i
think be capable of being construed as a compliment to the husband made
at the expense of the wife's and even of the sex's delicacy 

there is no fear that attempts could be formed by the most audacious  two
lovelaces there cannot be   upon a character so revered for virtue and
so charmingly spirited as miss howe's yet to have any man encouraged
to despise a husband by the example of one who is most concerned to do
him honour what my dear think you of that it is but too natural for
envious men and who that knows miss howe will not envy mr hickman to
scoff at and to jest upon those who are treated with or will bear
indignity from a woman 

if a man so treated have a true and ardent love for the woman he
addresses he will be easily overawed by her displeasure and this will
put him upon acts of submission which will be called meanness and what
woman of true spirit would like to have it said that she would impose
any thing upon the man from whom she one day expects protection and
defence that should be capable of being construed as a meanness or
unmanly abjectness in his behaviour even to herself nay i am not
sure and i ask it of you my dear to resolve me whether in your own
opinion it is not likely that a woman of spirit will despise rather
than value more the man who will take patiently an insult at her hands 
especially before company 

i have always observed that prejudices in disfavour of a person at his
first appearance fix deeper and are much more difficult to be removed
when fixed than that malignant principle so eminently visible in little
minds which makes them wish to bring down the more worthy characters to
their own low level i pretend not to determine when once therefore a
woman of your good sense gives room to the world to think she has not an
high opinion of the lover whom nevertheless she entertains it will be
very difficult for her afterwards to make that world think so well as she
would have it of the husband she has chosen 

give me leave to observe that to condescend with dignity and to command
with such kindness and sweetness of manners as should let the
condescension while in a single state be seen and acknowledged are
points which a wise woman knowing her man should aim at and a wise
woman i should think would choose to live single all her life rather
than give herself to a man whom she thinks unworthy of a treatment so
noble 

but when a woman lets her lover see that she has the generosity to
approve of and reward a well-meant service that she has a mind that
lifts her above the little captious follies which some too
licentiously i hope attribute to the sex in general that she resents
not if ever she thinks she has reason to be displeased with petulance 
or through pride nor thinks it necessary to insist upon little points 
to come at or secure great ones perhaps not proper to be aimed at nor
leaves room to suppose she has so much cause to doubt her own merit as
to put the love of the man she intends to favour upon disagreeable or
arrogant trials but let reason be the principal guide of her actions 
she will then never fail of that true respect of that sincere
veneration which she wishes to meet with and which will make her
judgment after marriage consulted sometimes with a preference to a man's
own at other times as a delightful confirmation of his 

and so much my beloved miss howe for this subject now and i dare say 
for ever 

i will begin another letter by-and-by and send both together mean
time i am etc 



letter xxxiii

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe


 in this letter the lady acquaints miss howe with mr brand's report 
 with her sister's proposals either that she will go abroad or
 prosecute mr lovelace she complains of the severe letters of
 her uncle antony and her sister but in milder terms than they
 deserved 

she sends her dr lewen's letter and the copy of her answer to it 

she tells her of the difficulties she had been under to avoid seeing mr 
 lovelace she gives her the contents of the letter she wrote to
 him to divert him from his proposed visit she is afraid she says 
 that it is a step that is not strictly right if allegory or
 metaphor be not allowable to one in her circumstances 

she informs her of her cousin morden's arrival and readiness to take her
 part with her relations of his designed interview with mr 
 lovelace and tells her what her apprehensions are upon it 

she gives her the purport of the conversation between her aunt hervey and
 mrs norton and then add  


but were they ever so favourably inclined to me now what can they do for
me i wish and that for their sakes more than for my own that they
would yet relent but i am very ill i must drop my pen a sudden
faintness overspreads my heart excuse my crooked writing adieu my
dear adieu 


three o'clock friday 

once more i resume my pen i thought i had taken my last farewell to
you i never was so very oddly affected something that seemed totally
to overwhelm my faculties i don't know how to describe it i believe i
do amiss in writing so much and taking too much upon me but an active
mind though clouded by bodily illness cannot be idle 

i'll see if the air and a discontinued attention will help me but if
it will not don't be concerned for me my dear i shall be happy nay 
i am more so already than of late i thought i could ever be in this life 
 yet how this body clings how it encumbers 


seven o'clock 

i could not send this letter away with so melancholy an ending as you
would have thought it so i deferred closing it till i saw how i should
be on my return from my airing and now i must say i am quite another
thing so alert that i could proceed with as much spirit as i began and
add more preachment to your lively subject if i had not written more
than enough upon it already 

i wish you would let me give you and mr hickman joy do my dear i
should take some to myself if you would 

my respectful compliments to all your friends as well to those i have
the honour to know as to those i do not know 


 


i have just now been surprised with a letter from one whom i long ago
gave up all thoughts of hearing from from mr wyerley i will enclose
it you'll be surprised at it as much as i was this seems to be a man
whom i might have reclaimed but i could not love him yet i hope i
never treated him with arrogance indeed my dear if i am not too
partial to myself i think i refused him with more gentleness than you
retain somebody else and this recollection gives me less pain than i
should have had in the other case on receiving this instance of a
generosity that affects me i will also enclose the rough draught of my
answer as soon as i have transcribed it 

if i begin another sheet i shall write to the end of it wherefore i
will only add my prayers for your honour and prosperity and for a long 
long happy life and that when it comes to be wound up you may be as
calm and as easy at quitting it as i hope in god i shall be i am and
will be to the latest moment 

your truly affectionate and obliged servant 
cl harlowe 



letter xxxiv

mr wyerley to miss clarissa harlowe
wednesday aug 23 


dearest madam 

you will be surprised to find renewed at this distance of time an
address so positively though so politely discouraged but however it be
received i must renew it every body has heard that you have been
vilely treated by a man who to treat you ill must be the vilest of men 
every body knows your just resentment of his base treatment that you are
determined never to be reconciled to him and that you persist in these
sentiments against all the entreaties of his noble relations against all
the prayers and repentance of his ignoble self and all the world that
have the honour to know you or have heard of him applaud your
resolution as worthy of yourself worthy of your virtue and of that
strict honour which was always attributed to you by every one who spoke
of you 

but madam were all the world to have been of a different opinion it
could never have altered mine i ever loved you i ever must love you 
yet have i endeavoured to resign to my hard fate when i had so many
ways in vain sought to move you in my favour i sat down seemingly
contented i even wrote to you that i would sit down contented and i
endeavoured to make all my friends and companions think i was but
nobody knows what pangs this self-denial cost me in vain did the chace 
in vain did travel in vain did lively company offer themselves and
were embraced in their turn with redoubled force did my passion for you
renew my unhappiness when i looked into myself into my own heart for
there did your charming image sit enthroned and you engrossed me all 

i truly deplore those misfortunes and those sufferings for your own
sake which nevertheless encourage me to renew my old hope i know not
particulars i dare not inquire after them because my sufferings would
be increased with the knowledge of what your's have been i therefore
desire not the know more than what common report wounds my ears with and
what is given me to know by your absence from your cruel family and
from the sacred place where i among numbers of your rejected admirers 
used to be twice a week sure to behold you doing credit to that service
of which your example gave me the highest notions but whatever be those
misfortunes of whatsoever nature those sufferings i shall bless the
occasion for my own sake though for your's curse the author of them if
they may give me the happiness to know that this my renewed address may
not be absolutely rejected only give me hope that it may one day meet
with encouragement if in the interim nothing happen either in my morals
or behaviour to give you fresh offence give me but hope of this not
absolutely to reject me is all the hope i ask for and i will love you 
if possible still more than i ever loved you and that for your
sufferings for well you deserve to be loved even to adoration who can 
for honour's and for virtue's sake subdue a passion which common spirits
 i speak by cruel experience  find invincible and this at a time when
the black offender kneels and supplicates as i am well assured he does 
 all his friends likewise supplicating for him to be forgiven 

that you cannot forgive him not forgive him so as to receive him again
to favour is no wonder his offence is against virtue this is a part
of your essence what magnanimity is this how just to yourself and to
your spotless character is it any merit to admire more than ever a lady
who can so exaltedly distinguish it is not i cannot plead it 

what hope have i left may it be said when my address was before
rejected now that your sufferings so nobly borne have with all the
good judges exalted your character yet madam i have to pride myself
in this that while your friends not looking upon you in the just light
i do persecute and banish you while your estate is withheld from you 
and threatened as i know to be withheld as long as the chicaning law 
or rather the chicaneries of its practisers can keep it from you while
you are destitute of protection every body standing aloof either
through fear of the injurer of one family or of the hard-hearted of the
other i pride myself i say to stand forth and offer my fortune and
my life at your devotion with a selfish hope indeed i should be too
great an hypocrite not to own this and i know how much you abhor
insincerity 

but whether you encourage that hope or not accept my best services i
beseech you madam and be pleased to excuse me for a piece of honest
art which the nature of the case doubting the honour of your notice
otherwise makes me choose to conclude with it is this 

if i am to be still the most unhappy of men let your pen by one line
tell me so if i am permitted to indulge a hope however distant your
silence shall be deemed by me the happiest indication of it that you
can give except that still happier the happiest than can befall me 
a signification that you will accept the tender of that life and fortune 
which it would be my pride and my glory to sacrifice in your service 
leaving the reward to yourself 

be your determination as it may i must for ever admire and love you 
nor will i ever change my condition while you live whether you change
your's or not for having once had the presumption to address you i
cannot stoop to think of any other woman and this i solemnly declare in
the presence of that god whom i daily pray to bless and protect you be
your determination what it will with regard to dearest madam 

your most devoted and ever affectionate
and faithful servant 
alexander wyerley 



letter xxxv

miss cl harlowe to alex wyerley esq 
sat aug 26 


sir 

the generosity of your purpose would have commanded not only my notice 
but my thanks although you had not given me the alternative you are
pleased to call artful and i do therefore give you my thanks for your
kind letter 

at the time you distinguished me by your favourable opinion i told you 
sir that my choice was the single life and most truly did i tell you
so 

when that was not permitted me and i looked round upon the several
gentlemen who had been proposed to me and had reason to believe that
there was not one of them against whose morals or principles there lay
not some exception it would not have been much to be wondered at if
fancy had been allowed to give a preference where judgment was at a loss
to determine 

far be it from me to say this with a design to upbraid you sir or to
reflect upon you i always wished you well you had reason to think i
did you had the generosity to be pleased with the frankness of my
behaviour to you as i had with that of your's to me and i am sorry 
very sorry to be now told that the acquaintance you obliged me with
gave you so much pain 

had the option i have mentioned been allowed me afterwards as i not
only wished but proposed things had not happened that did happen but
there was a kind of fatality by which our whole family was impelled as i
may say and which none of us were permitted to avoid but this is a
subject that cannot be dwelt upon 

as matters are i have only to wish for your own sake that you will
encourage and cultivate those good motions in your mind to which many
passages in your kind and generous letter now before me must be owing 
depend upon it sir that such motions wrought into habit will yield
you pleasure at a time when nothing else can and at present shining out
in your actions and conversation will commend you to the worthiest of
our sex for sir the man who is so good upon choice as well as by
education has that quality in himself which ennobles the human race 
and without which the most dignified by birth or rank or ignoble 

as to the resolution you solemnly make not to marry while i live i
should be concerned at it were i not morally sure that you may keep it 
and yet not be detrimented by it since a few a very few days will
convince you that i am got above all human dependence and that there is
no need of that protection and favour which you so generously offer to 
sir 

your obliged well-wisher and humble servant 
cl harlowe 



letter xxxvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
monday noon aug 28 


about the time of poor belton's interment last night as near as we could
guess lord m mowbray and myself toasted once to the memory of
honest tom belton and by a quick transition to the living health to
miss harlowe which lord m obligingly began and to the happy
reconciliation and then we stuck in a remembrance to honest jack
belford who of late we all agreed is become an useful and humane man 
and one who prefers his friend's service to his own 

but what is the meaning i hear nothing from thee and why dost thou not
let me into the grounds of the sudden reconciliation between my beloved
and her friends and the cause of the generous invitation which she gives
me of attending her at her father's some time hence 


 mr belford has not yet sent him his last-written letter his reason
for which see letter xxiii of this volume 


thou must certainly have been let into the secret by this time and i can
tell thee i shall be plaguy jealous if there is to be any one thing pass
between my angel and thee that is to be concealed from me for either i
am a principal in this cause or i am nothing 

i have dispatched will to know the reason of thy neglect 

but let me whisper a word or two in thy ear i begin to be afraid after
all that this letter was a stratagem to get me out of town and for
nothing else for in the first place tourville in a letter i received
this morning tells me that the lady is actually very ill  i am sorry
for it with all my soul   this thou'lt say i may think a reason why
she cannot set out as yet but then i have heard on the other hand but
last night that the family is as implacable as ever and my lord and i
expect this very afternoon a visit from colonel morden who undertakes 
it seems to question me as to my intention with regard to his cousin 

this convinces me that if she has apprized her friends of my offers to
her they will not believe me to be in earnest till they are assured
that i am so from my own mouth but then i understand that the intended
visit is an officiousness of morden's own without the desire of any of
her friends 

now jack what can a man make of all this my intelligence as to the
continuance of her family's implacableness is not to be doubted and yet
when i read her letter what can one say surely the dear little rogue
will not lie 

i never knew her dispense with her word but once and that was when she
promised to forgive me after the dreadful fire that had like to have
happened at our mother's and yet would not see me the next day and
afterwards made her escape to hampstead in order to avoid forgiving me 
and as she severely smarted for this departure from her honour given 
 for it is a sad thing for good people to break their word when it is in
their power to keep it one would not expect that she should set about
deceiving again more especially by the premeditation of writing thou 
perhaps wilt ask what honest man is obliged to keep his promise with a
highwayman for well i know thy unmannerly way of making comparisons but
i say every honest man is and i will give thee an illustration 

here is a marauding varlet who demands your money with a pistol at your
breast you have neither money nor valuable effects about you and
promise solemnly if he will spare your life that you will send him an
agreed-upon sum by such a day to such a place 

the question is if your life is not in the fellow's power 

how he came by the power is another question for which he must answer
with his life when caught so he runs risque for risque 

now if he give you your life does he not give think you a valuable
consideration for the money you engage your honour to send him if not 
the sum must be exorbitant or your life is a very paltry one even in
your own opinion 

i need not make the application and i am sure that even thou thyself 
who never sparest me and thinkest thou knowest my heart by thy own 
canst not possibly put the case in a stronger light against me 

then why do good people take upon themselves to censure as they do 
persons less scrupulous than themselves is it not because the latter
allow themselves in any liberty in order to carry a point and can my
not doing my duty warrant another for not doing his thou wilt not say
it can 

and how would it sound to put the case as strongly once more as my
greatest enemy would put it both as to fact and in words here has that
profligate wretch lovelace broken his vow with and deceived miss clarissa
harlowe a vile fellow would an enemy say but it is like him but
when it comes to be said that the pious clarissa has broken her word with
and deceived lovelace good lord would every one say sure it cannot be 

upon my soul jack such is the veneration i have for this admirable
woman that i am shocked barely at putting the case and so wilt thou if
thou respectest her as thou oughtest for thou knowest that men and
women all the world over form their opinions of one another by each
person's professions and known practices in this lady therefore it
would be unpardonable to tell a wilful untruth as it would be strange if
i kept my word in love cases i mean for as to the rest i am an
honest moral man as all who know me can testify 

and what after all would this lady deserve if she has deceived me in
this case for did she not set me prancing away upon lord m s best
nag to lady sarah's and to lady betty's with an erect and triumphing
countenance to show them her letter to me 

and let me tell thee that i have received their congratulations upon it 
well and now cousin lovelace cries one well and now cousin
lovelace cries t'other i hope you will make the best of husbands to so
excellent and so forgiving a lady and now we shall soon have the
pleasure of looking upon you as a reformed man added one and now we
shall see you in the way we have so long wished you to be in cried the
other 

my cousins montague also have been ever since rejoicing in the new
relationship their charming cousin and their lovely cousin at every
word and how dearly they will love he what lessons they will take
from her and yet charlotte who pretends to have the eye of an eagle 
was for finding out some mystery in the style and manner till i overbore
her and laughed her out of it 

as for lord m he has been in hourly expectation of being sent to with
proposals of one sort or other from the harlowes and still we have it 
that such proposals will be made by colonel morden when he comes and
that the harlowes only put on a fae of irreconcileableness till they
know the issue of morden's visit in order to make the better terms with
us 

indeed if i had not undoubted reason as i said to believe the
continuance of their antipathy to me and implacableness to her i should
be apt to think there might be some foundation for my lord's conjecture 
for there is a cursed deal of low cunning in all that family except in
the angel of it who has so much generosity of soul that she despises
cunning both name and thing 

what i mean by all this is to let thee see what a stupid figure i shall
make to all my own family if my clarissa has been capable as gulliver
in his abominable yahoo story phrases it if it were only that i should
be outwitted by such a novice at plotting and that it would make me look
silly to my kinswomen here who know i value myself upon my contrivances 
it would vex me to the heart and i would instantly clap a featherbed
into a coach and six and fetch her away sick or well and marry her at
my leisure 

but col morden is come and i must break off 



letter xxxvii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
monday night aug 28 


i doubt you will be all impatience that you have not heard from me since
mine of thursday last you would be still more so if you knew that i
had by me a letter ready written 

i went early yesterday morning to epsom and found every thing disposed
according to the directions i had left on friday and at night the solemn
office was performed tourville was there and behaved very decently 
and with greater concern than i thought he would every have expressed for
any body 

thomasine they told me in a kind of disguise was in an obscure pew 
out of curiosity for it seems she was far from showing any tokens of
grief to see the last office performed for the man whose heart she had
so largely contributed to break 

i was obliged to stay till this afternoon to settle several necessary
matters and to direct inventories to be taken in order for
appraisement for every thing is to be turned into money by his will 
i presented his sister with the hundred guineas the poor man left me as
his executor and desired her to continue in the house and take the
direction of every thing till i could hear from his nephew at antigua 
who is heir at law he had left her but fifty pounds although he knew
her indigence and that it was owing to a vile husband and not to
herself that she was indigent 

the poor man left about two hundred pounds in money and two hundred
pounds in two east-india bonds and i will contrive if i can to make
up the poor woman's fifty pounds and my hundred guineas two hundred
pounds to her and then she will have some little matter coming in
certain which i will oblige her to keep out of the hands of a son who
has completed that ruin which his father had very nearly effected 

i gave tourville his twenty pounds and will send you and mowbray your's
by the first order 

and so much for poor belton's affairs till i see you 

i got to town in the evening and went directly to smith's i found mrs 
lovick and mrs smith in the back shop and i saw they had been both in
tears they rejoiced to see me however and told me that the doctor
and mr goddard were but just gone as was also the worthy clergyman who
often comes to pray by her and all three were of opinion that she would
hardly live to see the entrance of another week i was not so much
surprised as grieved for i had feared as much when i left her on
saturday 

i sent up my compliments and she returned that she would take it for a
favour if i would call upon her in the morning by eight o'clock mrs 
lovick told me that she had fainted away on saturday while she was
writing as she had done likewise the day before and having received
benefit then by a little turn in a chair she was carried abroad again 
she returned somewhat better and wrote till late yet had a pretty good
night and went to covent-garden church in the morning but came home so
ill that she was obliged to lie down 

when she arose seeing how much grieved mrs lovick and mrs smith were
for her she made apologies for the trouble she gave them you were
happy said she before i came hither it was a cruel thing in me to
come amongst honest strangers and to be sick and die with you 

when they touched upon the irreconcileableness of her friends i have had
ill offices done me to them said she and they do not know how ill i am 
nor will they believe any thing i should write but yet i cannot
sometimes forbear thinking it a little hard that out of so many near and
dear friends as i have living not one of them will vouchsafe to look
upon me no old servant no old friend proceeded she to be permitted
to come near me without being sure of incurring displeasure and to
have such a great work to go through by myself a young creature as i am 
and to have every thing to think of as to my temporal matters and to
order to my very interment no dear mother said the sweet sufferer to
pray by me and bless me no kind sister to sooth and comfort me but
come recollected she how do i know but all is for the best if i can
but make a right use of my discomforts pray for me mrs lovick pray
for me mrs smith that i may i have great need of your prayers this
cruel man has discomposed me his persecutions have given mea pain just
here  putting her hand to her heart   what a step has he made me take
to avoid him who can touch pitch and not be defiled he had made a
bad spirit take possession of me i think broken in upon all my duties
 and will not yet i doubt let me be at rest indeed he is very cruel
 but this is one of my trials i believe by god's grace i shall be
easier to-morrow and especially if i have no more of his tormentings 
and if i can get a tolerable night and i will sit up till eleven that
i may 

she said that though this was so heavy a day with her she was at other
times within these few days past especially blessed with bright hours 
and particularly that she had now and then such joyful assurances which
she hoped were not presumptuous ones that god would receive her to his
mercy that she could hardly contain herself and was ready to think
herself above this earth while she was in it and what inferred she to
mrs lovick must be the state itself the very aspirations after which
have often cast a beamy light through the thickest darkness and when i
have been at the lowest ebb have dispelled the black clouds of
despondency as i hope they soon will this spirit of repining 

she had a pretty good night it seems and this morning went in a chair
to st dunstan's church 

the chairmen told mrs smith that after prayers for she did not return
till between nine and ten they carried her to a house in fleet-street 
whither they never waited on her before and where dost think this was 
 why to an undertaker's good heaven what a woman is this she went
into the back shop and talked with the master of it about half an hour 
and came from him with great serenity he waiting upon her to her chair
with a respectful countenance but full of curiosity and seriousness 

tis evident that she went to bespeak her house that she talked of as
soon as you can sir were her words to him as she got into the chair 
mrs smith told me this with the same surprise and grief that i heard it 


 see letter xxiii of this volume 


she was very ill in the afternoon having got cold either at st 
dunstan's or at chapel and sent for the clergyman to pray by her and
the women unknown to her sent both for dr h and mr goddard who were
just gone as i told you when i came to pay my respects to her this
evening 

and thus have i recounted from the good women what passed to this night
since my absence 

i long for to-morrow that i may see her and yet it is such a melancholy
longing as i never experienced and know not how to describe 


tuesday aug 29 

i was at smith's at half an hour after seven they told me that the lady
was gone in a chair to st dunstan's but was better than she had been in
either of the two preceding days and that she said she to mrs lovick
and mrs smith as she went into the chair i have a good deal to answer
for to you my good friends for my vapourish conversation of last night 

if mrs lovick said she smiling i have no new matters to discompose
me i believe my spirits will hold out purely 

she returned immediately after prayers 

mr belford said she as she entered the back shop where i was and
upon my approaching her i am very glad to see you you have been
performing for your poor friend a kind last office tis not long ago
since you did the same for a near relation is it not a little hard upon
you that these troubles should fall so thick to your lot but they are
charitable offices and it is a praise to your humanity that poor dying
people know not where to choose so well 

i told her i was sorry to hear she had been so ill since i had the honour
to attend her but rejoiced to find that now she seemed a good deal
better 

it will be sometimes better and sometimes worse replied she with poor
creatures when they are balancing between life and death but no more
of these matters just now i hope sir you'll breakfast with me i was
quite vapourish yesterday i had a very bad spirit upon me had i not 
mrs smith but i hope i shall be no more so and to-day i am perfectly
serene this day rises upon me as if it would be a bright one 

she desired me to walk up and invited mr smith and his wife and mrs 
lovick also to breakfast with her i was better pleased with her
liveliness than with her looks 

the good people retiring after breakfast the following conversation
passed between us 

pray sir let me ask you if you think i may promise myself that i shall
be no more molested by your friend 

i hesitated for how could i answer for such a man 

what shall i do if he comes again you see how i am i cannot fly from
him now if he has any pity left for the poor creature whom he has thus
reduced let him not come but have you heard from him lately and will
he come 

i hope not madam i have not heard from him since thursday last that
he went out of town rejoicing in the hopes your letter gave him of a
reconciliation between your friends and you and that he might in good
time see you at your father's and he is gone down to give all his
friends joy of the news and is in high spirits upon it 

alas for me i shall then surely have him come up to persecute me again 
as soon as he discovers that that was only a stratagem to keep him away 
he will come up and who knows but even now he is upon the road i
thought i was so bad that i should have been out of his and every body's
way before now for i expected not that this contrivance would serve me
above two or three days and by this time he must have found out that i
am not so happy as to have any hope of a reconciliation with my family 
and then he will come if it be only in revenge for what he will think a
deceit but is not i hope a wicked one 

i believe i looked surprised to hear her confess that her letter was a
stratagem only for she said you wonder mr belford i observe that i
could be guilty of such an artifice i doubt it is not right it was
done in a hurry of spirits how could i see a man who had so mortally
injured me yet pretending a sorrow for his crimes and wanting to see
me could behave with so much shocking levity as he did to the honest
people of the house yet tis strange too that neither you nor he
found out my meaning on perusal of my letter you have seen what i
wrote no doubt 

i have madam and then i began to account for it as an innocent
artifice 

thus far indeed sir it is an innocent that i meant him no hurt and
had a right to the effect i hoped for from it and he had none to invade
me but have you sir that letter of his in which he gives you as i
suppose he does the copy of mine 

i have madam and pulled it out of my letter-case but hesitating 
nay sir said she be pleased to read my letter to yourself i desire
not to see his and see if you can be longer a stranger to a meaning so
obvious 

i read it to myself indeed madam i can find nothing but that you are
going down to harlowe-place to be reconciled to your father and other
friends and mr lovelace presumed that a letter from your sister which
he saw brought when he was at mr smith's gave you the welcome news of
it 

she then explained all to me and that as i may say in six words a
religious meaning is couched under it and that's the reason that neither
you nor i could find it out 

read but for my father's house heaven said she and for the
interposition of my dear blessed friend suppose the mediation of my
saviour which i humbly rely upon and all the rest of the letter will
be accounted for  i hope repeated she that it is a pardonable
artifice but i am afraid it is not strictly right 

i read it so and stood astonished for a minute at her invention her
piety her charity and at thine and mine own stupidity to be thus taken
in 

and now thou vile lovelace what hast thou to do the lady all
consistent with herself and no hopes left for thee but to hang drown 
or shoot thyself for an outwitted boaster 

my surprise being a little over she proceeded as to the letter that
came from my sister while your friend was here you will soon see sir 
that it is the cruellest letter she ever wrote me 

and then she expressed a deep concern for what might be the consequence
of colonel morden's intended visit to you and besought me that if now 
or at any time hereafter i had opportunity to prevent any further
mischief without detriment or danger to myself i would do it 

i assured her of the most particular attention to this and to all her
commands and that in a manner so agreeable to her that she invoked a
blessing upon me for my goodness as she called it to a desolate
creature who suffered under the worst of orphanage those were her words 

she then went back to her first subject her uneasiness for fear of your
molesting her again and said if you have any influence over him mr 
belford prevail upon him that he will give me the assurance that the
short remainder of my time shall be all my own i have need of it 
indeed i have why will he wish to interrupt me in my duty has he not
punished me enough for my preference of him to all his sex has he not
destroyed my fame and my fortune and will not his causeless vengeance
upon me be complete unless he ruin my soul too excuse me sir for
this vehemence but indeed it greatly imports me to know that i shall be
no more disturbed by him and yet with all this aversion i would
sooner give way to his visit though i were to expire the moment i saw
him than to be the cause of any fatal misunderstanding between you and
him 

i assured her that i would make such a representation of the matter to
you and of the state of her health that i would undertake to answer for
you that you would not attempt to come near her 

and for this reason lovelace do i lay the whole matter before you and
desire you will authorize me as soon as this and mine of saturday last
come to your hands to dissipate her fears 

this gave her a little satisfaction and then she said that had i not
told her that i could promise for you she was determined ill as she is 
to remove somewhere out of my knowledge as well as out of your's and
yet to have been obliged to leave people i am but just got acquainted
with said the poor lady and to have died among perfect strangers would
have completed my hardships 

this conversation i found as well from the length as the nature of it 
had fatigued her and seeing her change colour once or twice i made that
my excuse and took leave of her desiring her permission however to
attend her in the evening and as often as possible for i could not help
telling her that every time i saw her i more and more considered her as
a beatified spirit and as one sent from heaven to draw me after her out
of the miry gulf in which i had been so long immersed 

and laugh at me if thou wilt but it is true that every time i approach
her i cannot but look upon her as one just entering into a companionship
with saints and angels this thought so wholly possessed me that i
could not help begging as i went away her prayers and her blessing 
with the reverence due to an angel 

in the evening she was so low and weak that i took my leave of her in
less than a quarter of an hour i went directly home where to the
pleasure and wonder of my cousin and her family i now pass many honest
evenings which they impute to your being out of town 

i shall dispatch my packet to-morrow morning early by my own servant to
make thee amends for the suspense i must have kept thee in thou'lt thank
me for that i hope but wilt not i am sure for sending thy servant
back without a letter 

i long for the particulars of the conversation between you and mr 
morden the lady as i have hinted is full of apprehensions about it 
send me back this packet when perused for i have not had either time or
patience to take a copy of it and i beseech you enable me to make good
my engagements to the poor lady that you will not invade her again 



letter xxxviii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
wednesday aug 30 


i have a conversation to give you that passed between this admirable lady
and dr h which will furnish a new instance of the calmness and serenity
with which she can talk of death and prepare for it as if it were an
occurrence as familiar to her as dressing and undressing 

as soon as i had dispatched my servant to you with my letters of the
26th 28th and yesterday the 29th i went to pay my duty to her and had
the pleasure to find her after a tolerable night pretty lively and
cheerful she was but just returned from her usual devotions and doctor
h alighted as she entered the door 

after inquiring how she did and hearing her complaints of shortness of
breath which she attributed to inward decay precipitated by her late
harasses as well from her friends as from you he was for advising her
to go into the air 

what will that do for me said she tell me truly good sir with a
cheerful aspect you know you cannot disturb me by it whether now you
do not put on the true physician and despairing that any thing in
medicine will help me advise me to the air as the last resource can
you think the air will avail in such a malady as mine 

he was silent 

i ask said she because my friends who will possibly some time hence
inquire after the means i used for my recovery may be satisfied that i
omitted nothing which so worthy and skilful a physician prescribed 

the air madam may possibly help the difficulty of breathing which has
so lately attacked you 

but sir you see how weak i am you must see that i have been consuming
from day to day and now if i can judge by what i feel in myself 
putting her hand to her heart i cannot continue long if the air would
very probably add to my days though i am far from being desirous to have
them lengthened i would go into it and the rather as i know mrs 
lovick would kindly accompany me but if i were to be at the trouble of
removing into new lodgings a trouble which i think now would be too
much for me and this only to die in the country i had rather the scene
were to shut up here for here have i meditated the spot and the
manner and every thing as well of the minutest as of the highest
consequence that can attend the solemn moments so doctor tell me
truly may i stay here and be clear of any imputations of curtailing 
through wilfulness or impatiency or through resentments which i hope i
am got above a life that might otherwise be prolonged tell me sir 
you are not talking to a coward in this respect indeed you are not 
unaffectedly smiling 

the doctor turning to me was at a loss what to say lifting up his eyes
only in admiration of her 

never had any patient said she a more indulgent and more humane
physician but since you are loth to answer my question directly i will
put it in other words you don't enjoin me to go into the air doctor do
you 

i do not madam nor do i now visit you as a physician but as a person
whose conversation i admire and whose sufferings i condole and to
explain myself more directly as to the occasion of this day's visit in
particular i must tell you madam that understanding how much you
suffer by the displeasure of your friends and having no doubt but that 
if they knew the way you are in they would alter their conduct to you 
and believing it must cut them to the heart when too late they shall be
informed of every thing i have resolved to apprize them by letter
 stranger as i am to their persons how necessary it is for some of them
to attend you very speedily for their sakes madam let me press for
your approbation of this measure 

she paused and at last said this is kind very kind in you sir but
i hope that you do not think me so perverse and so obstinate as to have
left till now any means unessayed which i thought likely to move my
friends in my favour but now doctor said she i should be too much
disturbed at their grief if they were any of them to come or to send to
me and perhaps if i found they still loved me wish to live and so
should quit unwillingly that life which i am now really fond of
quitting and hope to quit as becomes a person who has had such a
weaning-time as i have been favoured with 

i hope madam said i we are not so near as you apprehend to that
deplorable catastrophe you hint at with such an amazing presence of mind 
and therefore i presume to second the doctor's motion if it were only
for the sake of your father and mother that they may have the
satisfaction if they must lose you to think they were first reconciled
to you 

it is very kindly very humanely considered said she but if you think
me not so very near my last hour let me desire this may be postponed
till i see what effect my cousin morden's mediation may have perhaps he
may vouchsafe to make me a visit yet after his intended interview with
mr lovelace is over of which who knows mr belford but your next
letters may give an account i hope it will not be a fatal one to any
body will you promise me doctor to forbear writing for two days only 
and i will communicate to you any thing that occurs in that time and then
you shall take your own way mean time i repeat my thanks for your
goodness to me nay dear doctor hurry not away from me so
precipitately  for he was going for fear of an offered fee  i will no
more affront you with tenders that have pained you for some time past 
and since i must now from this kindly-offered favour look upon you only
as a friend i will assure you henceforth that i will give you no more
uneasiness on that head and now sir i know i shall have the pleasure
of seeing you oftener than heretofore 

the worthy gentleman was pleased with this assurance telling her that he
had always come to see her with great pleasure but parted with her on
the account she hinted at with as much pain and that he should not have
forborne to double his visits could he have had this kind assurance as
early as he wished for it 

there are few instances of like disinterestedness i doubt in this
tribe till now i always held it for gospel that friendship and
physician were incompatible things and little imagined that a man of
medicine when he had given over his patient to death would think of any
visits but those of ceremony that he might stand well with the family 
against it came to their turns to go through his turnpike 

after the doctor was gone she fell into a very serious discourse of the
vanity of life and the wisdom of preparing for death while health and
strength remained and before the infirmities of body impaired the
faculties of the mind and disabled them from acting with the necessary
efficacy and clearness the whole calculated for every one's meridian 
but particularly as it was easy to observe for thine and mine 

she was very curious to know farther particulars of the behaviour of poor
belton in his last moments you must not wonder at my inquiries mr 
belford said she for who is it that is to undertake a journey into a
country they never travelled to before that inquires not into the
difficulties of the road and what accommodations are to be expected in
the way 

i gave her a brief account of the poor man's terrors and unwillingness
to die and when i had done thus mr belford said she must it always
be with poor souls who have never thought of their long voyage till the
moment they are to embark for it 

she made other such observations upon this subject as coming from the
mouth of a person who will so soon be a companion for angels i shall
never forget and indeed when i went home that i might engraft them
the better on my memory i entered them down in writing but i will not
let you see them until you are in a frame more proper to benefit by them
than you are likely to be in one while 

thus far had i written when the unexpected early return of my servant
with your packet your's and he meeting at slough and exchanging
letters obliged me to leave off to give its contents a reading here 
therefore i close this letter 



letter xxxix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday morn aug 29 


now jack will i give thee an account of what passed on occasion of the
visit made us by col morden 

he came on horseback attended by one servant and lord m received him
as a relation of miss harlowe's with the highest marks of civility and
respect 

after some general talk of the times and of the weather and such
nonsense as englishmen generally make their introductory topics to
conversation the colonel addressed himself to lord m and to me as
follows 

i need not my lord and mr lovelace as you know the relation i bear to
the harlowe family make any apology for entering upon a subject which 
on account of that relation you must think is the principal reason of
the honour i have done myself in this visit 

miss harlowe miss clarissa harlowe's affair said lord m with his usual
forward bluntness that sir is what you mean she is by all
accounts the most excellent woman in the world 

i am glad to hear that is your lordship's opinion of her it is every
one's 

it is not only my opinion col morden proceeded the prating peer but
it is the opinion of all my family of my sisters of my nieces and of
mr lovelace himself 

col would to heaven it had been always mr lovelace's opinion of her 

lovel you have been out of england colonel a good many years 
perhaps you are not yet fully apprized of all the particulars of this
case 

col i have been out of england sir about seven years my cousin
clary was then about 12 years of age but never was there at twenty so
discreet so prudent and so excellent a creature all that knew her or
saw her admired her mind and person never did i see such promises of
perfection in any young lady and i am told nor is it to be wondered at 
that as she advanced to maturity she more than justified and made good
those promises then as to fortune what her father what her uncles 
and what i myself intended to do for her besides what her grandfather
had done there is not a finer fortune in the country 

lovel all this colonel and more than this is miss clarissa harlowe 
and had it not been for the implacableness and violence of her family
 all resolved to push her upon a match as unworthy of her as hateful to
her she had still been happy 

col i own mr lovelace the truth of what you observed just now that
i am not thoroughly acquainted with all that has passed between you and
my cousin but permit me to say that when i first heard that you made
your addresses to her i knew but of one objection against you that 
indeed a very great one and upon a letter sent me i gave her my free
opinion upon that subject but had it not been for that i own that 
in my private mind there could not have been a more suitable match for
you are a gallant gentleman graceful in your person easy and genteel in
your deportment and in your family fortunes and expectations happy as
a man can wish to be then the knowledge i had of you in italy
 although give me leave to say your conduct there was not wholly
unexceptionable convinces me that you are brave and few gentlemen come
up to you in wit and vivacity your education has given you great
advantages your manners are engaging and you have travelled and i
know if you'll excuse me you make better observations than you are
governed by all these qualifications make it not at all surprising that
a young lady should love you and that this love joined to that
indiscreet warmth wherewith my cousin's friends would have forced her
inclinations in favour of men who are far your inferiors in the qualities
i have named should throw herself upon your protection but then if
there were these two strong motives the one to induce the other to
impel her let me ask you sir if she were not doubly entitled to
generous usage from a man whom she chose for her protector and whom let
me take the liberty to say she could so amply reward for the protection
he was to afford her 


 see vol iv letter xix 


lovel miss clarissa harlowe was entitled sir to have the best usage
that man could give her i have no scruple to own it i will always do
her the justice she so well deserves i know what will be your inference 
and have only to say that time past cannot be recalled perhaps i wish
it could 

the colonel then in a very manly strain set forth the wickedness of
attempting a woman of virtue and character he said that men had
generally too many advantages from the weakness credulity and
inexperience of the fair sex that their early learning which chiefly
consisted in inflaming novels and idle and improbable romances 
contributed to enervate and weaken their minds that his cousin however 
he was sure was above the reach of common seduction and not to be
influenced to the rashness her parents accused her of by weaker motives
than their violence and the most solemn promises on my part but 
nevertheless having those motives and her prudence eminent as it was 
being rather the effect of constitution than experience a fine
advantage however he said to ground an unblamable future life upon 
she might not be apprehensive of bad designs in a man she loved it was 
therefore a very heinous thing to abuse the confidence of such a woman 

he was going on in this trite manner when interrupting him i said 
these general observations colonel suit not perhaps this particular
case but you yourself are a man of gallantry and possibly were you
to be put to the question might not be able to vindicate every action of
your life any more than i 

col you are welcome sir to put what questions you please to me 
and i thank god i can both own an be ashamed of my errors 

lord m looked at me but as the colonel did not by his manner seem to
intend a reflection i had no occasion to take it for one especially as
i can as readily own my errors as he or any man can his whether
ashamed of them or not 

he proceeded as you seem to call upon me mr lovelace i will tell you
 without boasting of it what has been my general practice till lately 
that i hope i have reformed it a good deal 

i have taken liberties which the laws of morality will by no means
justify and once i should have thought myself warranted to cut the
throat of any young fellow who should make as free with a sister of mine
as i have made with the sisters and daughters of others but then i took
care never to promise any thing i intended not to perform a modest ear
should as soon have heard downright obscenity from my lips as matrimony 
if i had not intended it young ladies are generally ready enough to
believe we mean honourably if they love us and it would look lie a
strange affront to their virtue and charms that it should be supposed
needful to put the question whether in your address you mean a wife but
when once a man make a promise i think it ought to be performed and a
woman is well warranted to appeal to every one against the perfidy of a
deceiver and is always sure to have the world on her side 

now sir continued he i believe you have so much honour as to own that
you could not have made way to so eminent a virtue without promising
marriage and that very explicitly and solemnly 

i know very well colonel interrupted i all you would say you will
excuse me i am sure that i break in upon you when you find it is to
answer the end you drive at 

i own to you then that i have acted very unworthily by miss clarissa
harlowe and i'll tell you farther that i heartily repent of my
ingratitude and baseness to her nay i will say still farther that i
am so grossly culpable as to her that even to plead that the abuses and
affronts i daily received from her implacable relations were in any
manner a provocation to me to act vilely by her would be a mean and low
attempt to excuse myself so low and so mean that it would doubly
condemn me and if you can say worse speak it 

he looked upon lord m and then upon me two or three times and my lord
said my kinsman speaks what he thinks i'll answer for him 

lovel i do sir and what can i say more and what farther in your
opinion can be done 

col done sir why sir  in a haughty tone he spoke   i need not
tell you that reparation follows repentance and i hope you make no
scruple of justifying your sincerity as to the one or the other 

i hesitated for i relished not the manner of his speech and his
haughty accent as undetermined whether to take proper notice of it or
not 

col let me put this question to you mr lovelace is it true as i
have heard it is that you would marry my cousin if she would have you 
 what say you sir 

this wound me up a peg higher 

lovel some questions as they may be put imply commands colonel i
would be glad to know how i am to take your's and what is to be the end
of your interrogatories 

col my questions are not meant by me as commands mr lovelace the
end is to prevail upon a gentleman to act like a gentleman and a man of
honour 

lovel briskly and by what arguments sir do you propose to prevail
upon me 

col by what arguments sir prevail upon a gentleman to act like a
gentleman i am surprised at that question from mr lovelace 

lovel why so sir 

col why so sir angrily let me 

lovel interrupting i don't choose colonel to be repeated upon in
that accent 

lord m come come gentlemen i beg of you to be willing to understand
one another you young gentlemen are so warm 

col not i my lord i am neither very young nor unduly warm your
nephew my lord can make me be every thing he would have me to be 

lovel and that shall be whatever you please to be colonel 

col fiercely the choice be your's mr lovelace friend or foe as
you do or are willing to do justice to one of the finest women in the
world 

lord m i guessed from both your characters what would be the case
when you met let me interpose gentlemen and beg you but to understand
one another you both shoot at one mark and if you are patient will
both hit it let me beg of you colonel to give no challenges 

col challenges my lord they are things i ever was readier to accept
than to offer but does your lordship think that a man so nearly
related as i have the honour to be to the most accomplished woman on
earth 

lord m interrupting we all allow the excellencies of the lady and
we shall all take it as the greatest honour to be allied to her that can
be conferred upon us 

col so you ought my lord 

a perfect chamont thought i 


 see otway's orphan 


lord m so we ought colonel and so we do and pray let every one do
as he ought and no more than he ought and you colonel let me tell
you will not be so hasty 

lovel coolly come come col morden don't let this dispute whatever
you intend to make of it go farther than with you and me you
deliver yourself in very high terms higher than ever i was talked to in
my life but here beneath this roof twould be inexcusable for me to
take that notice of it which perhaps it would become me to take
elsewhere 

col that is spoken as i wish the man to speak whom i should be pleased
to call my friend if all his actions were of a piece and as i would
have the man speak whom i would think it worth my while to call my foe 
i love a man of spirit as i love my soul but mr lovelace as my lord
thinks we aim at one mark let me say that were we permitted to be alone
for six minutes i dare say we should soon understand one another
perfectly well and he moved to the door 

lovel i am entirely of your opinion sir and will attend you 

my lord rung and stept between us colonel return i beseech you
return said he for he had stept out of the room while my lord held me 
nephew you shall not go out 

the bell and my lord's raised voice brought in mowbray and clements my
lord's gentleman the former in his careless way with his hands behind
him what's the matter bobby what's the matter my lord 

only only only stammered the agitated peer these young gentlemen are 
are are are young gentlemen that's all pray colonel morden  who
again entered the room with a sedater aspect   let this cause have a fair
trial i beseech you 

col with all my heart my lord 

mowbray whispered me what is the cause bobby shall i take the
gentleman to task for thee my boy 

not for the world whispered i the colonel is a gentleman and i desire
you'll not say one word 

well well well bobby i have done i can turn thee loose to the best
man upon god's earth that's all bobby strutting off to the other end
of the room 

col i am sorry my lord i should give your lordship the least
uneasiness i came not with such a design 

lord m indeed colonel i thought you did by your taking fire so
quickly i am glad to hear you say you did not how soon a little spark
kindles into a flame especially when it meets with such combustible
spirits 

col if i had had the least thought of proceeding to extremities i am
sure mr lovelace would have given me the honour of a meeting where i
should have been less an intruder but i came with an amicable intention 
to reconcile differences rather than to widen them 

lovel well then colonel morden let us enter upon the subject in your
own way i don't know the man i should sooner choose to be upon terms
with than one whom miss clarissa harlowe so much respects but i cannot
bear to be treated either in word or accent in a menacing way 

lord m well well well well gentlemen this is somewhat like 
angry men make to themselves beds of nettles and when they lie down in
them are uneasy with every body but i hope you are friends let me
hear you say you are i am persuaded colonel that you don't know all
this unhappy story you don't know how desirous my kinsman is as well
as all of us to have this matter end happily you don't know do you 
colonel that mr lovelace at all our requests is disposed to marry the
lady 

col at all your requests my lord i should have hoped that mr 
lovelace was disposed to do justice for the sake of justice and when at
the same time the doing of justice was doing himself the highest honour 

mowbray lifted up his before half-closed eyes to the colonel and glanced
them upon me 

lovel this is in very high language colonel 

mowbr by my soul i thought so 

col high language mr lovelace is it not just language 

lovel it is colonel and i think the man that does honour to miss
clarissa harlowe does me honour but nevertheless there is a manner
in speaking that may be liable to exception where the words without
that manner can bear none 

col your observation in the general is undoubtedly just but if you
have the value for my cousin that you say you have you must needs think
 

lovel you must allow me sir to interrupt you if i have the value i
say i have i hope sir when i say i have that value there is no room
for that if pronounced as you pronounced it with an emphasis 

col you have broken in upon me twice mr lovelace i am as little
accustomed to be broken in upon as you are to be repeated upon 

lord m two barrels of gunpowder by my conscience what a devil will
it signify talking if thus you are to blow one another up at every word 

lovel no man of honour my lord will be easy to have his veracity
called into question though but by implication 

col had you heard me out mr lovelace you would have found that my
if was rather an if of inference than of doubt but tis really a
strange liberty gentlemen of free principles take who at the same time
that they would resent unto death the imputation of being capable of
telling an untruth to a man will not scruple to break through the most
solemn oaths and promises to a woman i must assure you mr lovelace 
that i always made a conscience of my vows and promises 

lovel you did right colonel but let me tell you sir that you know
not the man you talk to if you imagine he is not able to rise to a
proper resentment when he sees his generous confessions taken for a mark
of base-spiritedness 

col warmly and with a sneer far be it from me mr lovelace to
impute to you the baseness of spirit you speak of for what would that be
but to imagine that a man who has done a very flagrant injury is not
ready to show his bravery in defending it 

mowbr this is d d severe colonel it is by jove i could not
take so much at the hands of any man breathing as mr lovelace before
this took at your's 

col who are you sir what pretence have you to interpose in a cause
where there is an acknowledged guilt on one side and the honour of a
considerable family wounded in the tenderest part by that guilt on the
other 

mowbr whispering to the colonel my dear child you will oblige me
highly if you will give me the opportunity of answering your question 
and was going out 

the colonel was held in by my lord and i brought in mowbray 

col pray my good lord let me attend this officious gentleman i
beseech you do i will wait upon your lordship in three minutes depend
upon it 

lovel mowbray is this acting like a friend by me to suppose me
incapable of answering for myself and shall a man of honour and
bravery as i know colonel morden to be rash as perhaps in this visit
he has shown himself have it to say that he comes to my lord m s
house in a manner naked as to attendants and friends and shall not for
that reason be rather borne with than insulted this moment my dear
mowbray leave us you have really no concern in this business and if
you are my friend i desire you'll ask the colonel pardon for interfering
in it in the manner you have done 

mowbr well well bob thou shalt be arbiter in this matter i know i
have no business in it and colonel holding out his hand i leave you
to one who knows how to defend his own cause as well as any man in
england 

col taking mowbray's hand at lord m s request you need not tell
me that mr mowbray i have no doubt of mr lovelace's ability to
defend his own cause were it a cause to be defended and let me tell
you mr lovelace that i am astonished to think that a brave man and a
generous man as you have appeared to be in two or three instances that
you have given in the little knowledge i have of you should be capable
of acting as you have done by the most excellent of her sex 

lord m well but gentlemen now mr mowbray is gone and you have
both shown instances of courage and generosity to boot let me desire you
to lay your heads together amicably and think whether there be any thing
to be done to make all end happily for the lady 

lovel but hold my lord let me say one thing now mowbray is gone 
and that is that i think a gentleman ought not to put up tamely one or
two severe things that the colonel has said 

lord m what the devil canst thou mean i thought all had been over 
why thou hast nothing to do but to confirm to the colonel that thou art
willing to marry miss harlowe if she will have thee 

col mr lovelace will not scruple to say that i suppose 
notwithstanding all that has passed but if you think mr lovelace i
have said any thing i should not have said i suppose it is this that
the man who has shown so little of the thing honour to a defenceless
unprotected woman ought not to stand so nicely upon the empty name of
it with a man who is expostulating with him upon it i am sorry to have
cause to say this mr lovelace but i would on the same occasion 
repeat it to a king upon his throne and surrounded by all his guards 

lord m but what is all this but more sacks upon the mill more coals
upon the fire you have a mind to quarrel both of you i see that are
you not willing nephew are you not most willing to marry this lady if
she can be prevailed upon to have you 

lovel d n me my lord if i'd marry my empress upon such treatment
as this 

lord m why now bob thou art more choleric than the colonel it was
his turn just now and now you see he is cool you are all gunpowder 

lovel i own the colonel has many advantages over me but perhaps 
there is one advantage he has not if it were put to the trial 

col i came not hither as i said before to seek the occasion but if
it were offered me i won't refuse it and since we find we disturb my
good lord m i'll take my leave and will go home by the way of st 
alban's 

lovel i'll see you part of the way with all my heart colonel 

col i accept your civility very cheerfully mr lovelace 

lord m interposing again as we were both for going out and what
will this do gentlemen suppose you kill one another will the matter
be bettered or worsted by that will the lady be made happier or
unhappier do you think by either or both of your deaths your
characters are too well known to make fresh instances of the courage of
either needful and i think if the honour of the lady is your view 
colonel it can by no other way so effectually promoted as by marriage 
and sir if you would use your interest with her it is very probable
that you may succeed though nobody else can 

lovel i think my lord i have said all that a man can say since
what is passed cannot be recalled and you see colonel morden rises in
proportion to my coolness till it is necessary for me to assert myself 
or even he would despise me 

lord m let me ask you colonel have you any way any method that you
think reasonable and honourable to propose to bring about a
reconciliation with the lady that is what we all wish for and i can
tell you sir it is not a little owing to her family and to their
implacable usage of her that her resentments are heightened against my
kinsman who however has used her vilely but is willing to repair her
wrongs 

lovel not my lord for the sake of her family nor for this
gentleman's haughty behaviour but for her own sake and in full sense of
the wrongs i have done her 

col as to my haughty behaviour as you call it sir i am mistaken if
you would not have gone beyond it in the like case of a relation so
meritorious and so unworthily injured and sir let me tell you that
if your motives are not love honour and justice and if they have the
least tincture of mean compassion for her or of an uncheerful assent on
your part i am sure it will neither be desired or accepted by a person
of my cousin's merit and sense nor shall i wish that it should 

lovel don't think colonel that i am meanly compounding off a debate 
that i should as willingly go through with you as to eat or drink if i
have the occasion given me for it but thus much i will tell you that my
lord that lady sarah sadleir lady betty lawrance my two cousins
montague and myself have written to her in the most solemn and sincere
manner to offer her such terms as no one but herself would refuse and
this long enough before colonel morden's arrival was dreamt of 

col what reason sir may i ask does she give against listening to
so powerful a mediation and to such offers 

lovel it looks like capitulating or else 

col it looks not like any such thing to me mr lovelace who have as
good an opinion of your spirit as man can have and what pray is the
part i act and my motives for it are they not in desiring that
justice may be done to my cousin clarissa harlowe that i seek to
establish the honour of mrs lovelace if matters can once be brought to
bear 

lovel were she to honour me with her acceptance of that name mr 
morden i should not want you or any man to assert the honour of mrs 
lovelace 

col i believe it but still she has honoured you with that
acceptance she is nearer to me than to you mr lovelace and i speak
this only to show you that in the part i take i mean rather to deserve
your thanks than your displeasure though against yourself were there
occasion nor ought you take it amiss if you rightly weigh the matter 
for sir whom does a lady want protection against but her injurers and
who has been her greatest injurer till therefore she becomes entitled
to your protection as your wife you yourself cannot refuse me some
merit in wishing to have justice done my cousin but sir you were
going to say that if it were not to look like capitulating you would
hint the reasons my cousin gives against accepting such an honourable
mediation 

i then told him of my sincere offers of marriage i made no difficulty 
i said to own my apprehensions that my unhappy behaviour to her had
greatly affected her but that it was the implacableness of her friends
that had thrown her into despair and given her a contempt for life  i
told him that she had been so good as to send me a letter to divert me
from a visit my heart was set upon making her a letter on which i built
great hopes because she assured me that in it she was going to her
father's and that i might see her there when she was received if it
were not my own fault 

col is it possible and were you sir thus earnest and did she
send you such a letter 

lord m confirmed both and also that in obedience to her desires and
that intimation i had come down without the satisfaction i had proposed
to myself in seeing her 

it is very true colonel said i and i should have told you this before 
but your heat made me decline it for as i said it had an appearance of
meanly capitulating with you an abjectness of heart of which had i
been capable i should have despised myself as much as i might have
expected you would despise me 

lord m proposed to enter into the proof of all this he said in his
phraseological way that one story was good till another was heard and
that the harlowe family and i twas true had behaved like so many
orsons to one another and that they had been very free with all our
family besides that nevertheless for the lady's sake more than for
their's or even for mine he could tell me he would do greater things
for me than they could ask if she could be brought to have me and that
this he wanted to declare and would sooner have declared if he could
have brought us sooner to patience and a good understanding 

the colonel made excuses for his warmth on the score of his affection to
his cousin 

my regard for her made me readily admit them and so a fresh bottle of
burgundy and another of champagne being put upon the table we sat down
in good humour after all this blustering in order to enter closer into
the particulars of the case which i undertook at both their desires to
do 

but these things must be the subject of another letter which shall
immediately follow this if it do not accompany it 

mean time you will observe that a bad cause gives a man great
disadvantages for i myself thing that the interrogatories put to me with
so much spirit by the colonel made me look cursedly mean at the same
time that it gave him a superiority which i know not how to allow to the
best man in europe so that literally speaking as a good man would
infer guilt is its own punisher in that it makes the most lofty spirit
look like the miscreant he is a good man i say so jack proleptically
i add thou hast no right to make the observation 



letter xl

mr lovelace
 in continuation  
tuesday afternoon aug 29 


i went back in this part of our conversation to the day that i was
obliged to come down to attend my lord in the dangerous illness which
some feared would have been his last 

i told the colonel what earnest letters i had written to a particular
friend to engage him to prevail upon the lady not to slip a day that had
been proposed for the private celebration of our nuptials and of my
letters written to her on that subject  for i had stepped to my closet 
and fetched down all the letters and draughts and copies of letters
relating to this affair 


 see vol vi letters xxxvii xxxviii xxxix xliii 


i read to him several passages in the copies of those letters which 
thou wilt remember make not a little to my honour  and i told him 
that i wished i had kept copies of those to my friend on the same
occasion by which he would have seen how much in earnest i was in my
professions to her although she would not answer one of them  and thou
mayest remember that one of those four letters accounted to herself why
i was desirous she should remain where i had left her 


 see vol vi letter xxxvii 


i then proceeded to give him an account of the visit made by lady sarah
and lady betty to lord m and me in order to induce me to do her
justice of my readiness to comply with their desires and of their high
opinion of her merit of the visit made to miss howe by my cousins
montague in the name of us all to engage her interest with her friend
in my behalf of my conversation with miss howe at a private assembly 
to whom i gave the same assurances and besought her interest with her
friend 

i then read a copy of the letter though so much to my disadvantage 
which was written to her by miss charlotte montague aug 1 entreating
her alliance in the names of all our family 


 see vol vii letter lxvi 


this made him ready to think that his fair cousin carried her resentment
against me too far he did not imagine he said that either myself or
our family had been so much in earnest 

so thou seest belford that it is but glossing over one part of a story 
and omitting another that will make a bad cause a good one at any time 
what an admirable lawyer should i have made and what a poor hand would
this charming creature with all her innocence have made of it in a
court of justice against a man who had so much to say and to show for
himself 

i then hinted at the generous annual tender which lord m and his sisters
made to his fair cousin in apprehension that she might suffer by her
friends' implacableness 

and this also the colonel highly applauded and was pleased to lament the
unhappy misunderstanding between the two families which had made the
harlowes less fond of an alliance with a family of so much honour as this
instance showed ours to be 

i then told him that having by my friend  meaning thee   who was
admitted into her presence and who had always been an admirer of her
virtues and had given me such advice from time to time in relation to
her as i wished i had followed been assured that a visit from me would
be very disagreeable to her i once more resolved to try what a letter
would do and that accordingly on the seventh of august i wrote her
one 

this colonel is the copy of it i was then out of humour with my lord
m and the ladies of my family you will therefore read it to
yourself  


 see vol vii letter lxxix 


this letter gave him high satisfaction you write here mr lovelace 
from your heart tis a letter full of penitence and acknowledgement 
your request is reasonable to be forgiven only as you shall appear to
deserve it after a time of probation which you leave to her to fix 
pray sir did she return an answer to this letter 

she did but with reluctance i own and not till i had declared by my
friend that if i could not procure one i would go up to town and
throw myself at her feet 

i wish i might be permitted to see it sir or to hear such parts of it
read as you shall think proper 

turning over my papers here it is sir i will make no scruple to put
it into your hands 

this is very obliging mr lovelace 

he read it my charming cousin how strong her resentments yet how
charitable her wishes good heaven that such an excellent creature 
but mr lovelace it is to your regret as much as to mine i doubt not
 

interrupting him i swore that it was 

so it ought said he nor do i wonder that it should be so i shall
tell you by-and-by proceeded he how much she suffers with her friends
by false and villanous reports but sir will you permit me to take
with me these two letters i shall make use of them to the advantage of
you both 

i told him i would oblige him with all my heart and this he took very
kindly as he had reason and put them in his pocket-book promising to
return hem in a few days 

i then told him that upon this her refusal i took upon myself to go to
town in hopes to move her in my favour and that though i went without
giving her notice of my intention yet had she got some notion of my
coming and so contrived to be out of the way and at last when she
found i was fully determined at all events to see her before i went
abroad which i shall do said i if i cannot prevail upon her she
sent me the letter i have already mentioned to you desiring me to
suspend my purposed visit and that for a reason which amazes and
confounds me because i don't find there is any thing in it and yet i
never knew her once dispense with her word for she always made it a
maxim that it was not lawful to do evil that good might come of it and
yet in this letter for no reason in the world but to avoid seeing me to
gratify an humour only has she sent me out of town depending upon the
assurance she had given me 

col this is indeed surprising but i cannot believe that my cousin 
for such an end only or indeed for any end according to the character i
hear of her should stoop to make use of such an artifice 

lovel this colonel is the thing that astonishes me and yet see
here this is the letter she wrote me nay sir tis her own hand 

col i see it is and a charming hand it is 

lovel you observe colonel that all her hopes of reconciliation with
her parents are from you you are her dear blessed friend she always
talked of you with delight 

col would to heaven i had come to england before she left
harlowe-place nothing of this had then happened not a man of those
whom i have heard that her friends proposed for her should have had her 
nor you mr lovelace unless i had found you to be the man every one who
sees you must wish you to be and if you had been that man no one living
should i have preferred to you for such an excellence 

my lord and i both joined in the wish and faith i wished it most
cordially 

the colonel read the letter twice over and then returned it to me tis
all a mystery said he i can make nothing of it for alas her
friends are as averse to a reconciliation as ever 

lord m i could not have thought it but don't you think there is
something very favourable to my nephew in this letter something that
looks as if the lady would comply at last 

col let me die if i know what to make of it this letter is very
different from her preceding one you returned an answer to it mr 
lovelace 

lovel an answer colonel no doubt of it and an answer full of
transport i told her i would directly set out for lord m s in
obedience to her will i told her that i would consent to any thing she
should command in order to promote this happy reconciliation i told
her that it should be my hourly study to the end of my life to deserve
a goodness so transcendent  but i cannot forbear saying that i am not a
little shocked and surprised if nothing more be meant by it than to get
me into the country without seeing her 

col that can't be the thing depend upon it sir there must be more
in it than that for were that all she must think you would soon be
undeceived and that you would then most probably resume your intention 
unless indeed she depended upon seeing me in the interim as she knew i
was arrived but i own i know not what to make of it only that she
does me a great deal of honour if it be me that she calls her dear
blessed friend whom she always loved and honoured indeed i ever loved
her and if i die unmarried and without children shall be as kind to
her as her grandfather was and the rather as i fear there is too much
of envy and self-love in the resentments her brother and sister endeavour
to keep up in her father and mother against her but i shall know better
how to judge of this when my cousin james comes from edinburgh and he
is every hour expected 

but let me ask you mr lovelace what is the name of your friend who is
admitted so easily into my cousin's presence is it not belford pray 

lovel it is sir and mr belford's a man of honour and a great
admirer of your fair cousin 

was i right as to the first jack the last i have such strong proof
of that it makes me question the first since she would not have been
out of the way of my intended visit but for thee 

col are you sure sir that mr belford is a man of honour 

lovel i can swear for him colonel what makes you put this question 

col only this that an officious pragmatical novice has been sent up
to inquire into my cousin's life and conversation and would you believe
it the frequent visits of this gentlemen have been interpreted basely to
her disreputation read that letter mr lovelace and you will be
shocked at ever part of it 

this cursed letter no doubt is from the young levite whom thou jack 
describest as making inquiry of mrs smith about miss harlowe's character
and visiters 


 see vol vii letter lxxxi 


i believe i was a quarter of an hour in reading it for i made it though
not a short one six times as long as it is by the additions of oaths
and curses to every pedantic line lord m too helped to lengthen it by
the like execrations and thou jack wilt have as much reason to curse
it as we 

you cannot but see said the colonel when i had done reading it that
this fellow has been officious in his malevolence for what he says is
mere hearsay and that hearsay conjectural scandal without fact or the
appearance of fact to support it so that an unprejudiced eye upon the
face of the letter would condemn the writer of it as i did and acquit
my cousin but yet such is the spirit by which the rest of my relations
are governed that they run away with the belief of the worst it
insinuates and the dear creature has had shocking letters upon it the
pedant's hints are taken and a voyage to one of the colonies has been
proposed to her as the only way to avoid mr belford and you i have
not seen these letters indeed but they took a pride in repeating some of
their contents which must have cut the poor soul to the heart and
these joined to her former sufferings what have you not mr lovelace 
to answer for 

lovel who the devil could have expected such consequences as these 
who could have believe there could be parents so implacable brother and
sister so immovably fixed against the only means that could be taken to
put all right with every body and what now can be done 

lord m i have great hopes that col morden may yet prevail upon his
cousin and by her last letter it runs in my mind that she has some
thoughts of forgiving all that's past do you think colonel if there
should not be such a thing as a reconciliation going forward at present 
that her letter may not imply that if we could bring such a thing to
bear with her friends she would be reconciled with mr lovelace 

col such an artifice would better become the italian subtilty than the
english simplicity your lordship has been in italy i presume 

lovel my lord has read boccaccio perhaps and that's as well as to
the hint he gives which may be borrowed from one of that author's
stories but miss clarissa harlowe is above all artifice she must have
some meaning i cannot fathom 

col well my lord i can only say that i will make some use of the
letters mr lovelace has obliged me with and after i have had some talk
with my cousin james who is hourly expected and when i have dispatched
two or three affairs that press upon me i will pay my respects to my
dear cousin and shall then be able to form a better judgment of things 
mean time i will write to her for i have sent to inquire about her and
find she wants consolation 

lovel if you favour me colonel with the d d letter of that fellow
brand for a day or two you will oblige me 

col i will but remember the man is a parson mr lovelace an
innocent one too they say else i had been at him before now and
these college novices who think they know every thing in their
cloisters and that all learning lies in books make dismal figures when
they come into the world among men and women 

lord m brand brand it should have been firebrand i think in my
conscience 

thus ended this doughty conference 

i cannot say jack but i am greatly taken with col morden he is brave
and generous and knows the world and then his contempt of the parsons
is a certain sign that he is one of us 

we parted with great civility lord m not a little pleased that we did 
and as greatly taken with colonel repeated his wish after the colonel
was gone that he had arrived in time to save the lady if that would
have done it 

i wish so too for by my soul jack i am every day more and more uneasy
about her but i hope she is not so ill as i am told she is 

i have made charlotte transcribe the letter of this firebrand as my lord
calls him and will enclose her copy of it all thy phlegm i know will
be roused into vengeance when thou readest it 

i know not what to advise as to showing it to the lady yet perhaps 
she will be able to reap more satisfaction than concern from it knowing
her own innocence in that it will give her to hope that her friends'
treatment of her is owing as much to misrepresentation as to their own
natural implacableness such a mind as her's i know would be glad to
find out the shadow of a reason for the shocking letters the colonel says
they have sent her and for their proposal to her of going to some one of
the colonies  confound them all but if i begin to curse i shall never
have done  then it may put her upon such a defence as she might be glad
of an opportunity to make and to shame them for their monstrous
credulity but this i leave to thy own fat-headed prudence only it vexes
me to the heart that even scandal and calumny should dare to surmise the
bare possibility of any man sharing the favours of a woman whom now
methinks i could worship with a veneration due only to a divinity 

charlotte and her sister could not help weeping at the base aspersion 
when when said patty lifting up her hands will this sweet lady's
sufferings be at an end o cousin lovelace 

and thus am i blamed for every one's faults when her brutal father
curses her it is i i upbraid her with her severe mother the
implacableness of her stupid uncles is all mine the virulence of her
brother and the spite of her sister are entirely owing to me the
letter of this rascal brand is of my writing o jack what a wretch is
thy lovelace 


 


returned without a letter this d d fellow will is returned without
a letter yet the rascal tells me that he hears you have been writing to
me these two days 

plague confound thee who must know my impatience and the reason for it 

to send a man and horse on purpose as i did my imagination chained me
to the belly of the beast in order to keep pace with him now he is got
to this place now to that now to london now to thee 

now  a letter given him  whip and spur upon the return this town just
entered not staying to bait that village passed by leaves the wind
behind him in a foaming sweat man and horse 

and in this way did he actually enter lord m s courtyard 

the reverberating pavement brought me down the letter will the
letter dog the letter sirrah 

no letter sir then wildly staring round me fists clenched and
grinning like a maniac confound thee for a dog and him that sent thee
without one this moment out of my sight or i'll scatter thy stupid
brains through the air i snatched from his holsters a pistol while the
rascal threw himself from the foaming beast and ran to avoid the fate
which i wished with all my soul thou hadst been within the reach of me to
have met with 

but to be as meek as a lamb to one who has me at his mercy and can
wring and torture my soul as he pleases what canst thou mean to send
back my varlet without a letter i will send away by day-dawn another
fellow upon another beast for what thou hast written and i charge thee
on thy allegiance that thou dispatch him not back empty-handed 


postscript

charlotte in a whim of delicacy is displeased that i send the enclosed
letter to you that her handwriting forsooth should go into the hands
of a single man 

there's encouragement for thee belford this is a certain sign that
thou may'st have her if thou wilt and yet till she has given me this
unerring demonstration of her glancing towards thee i could not have
thought it indeed i have often in pleasantry told her that i would
bring such an affair to bear but i never intended it because she
really is a dainty girl and thou art such a clumsy fellow in thy person 
that i should as soon have wished her a rhinoceros for a husband as thee 
but poor little dears they must stay till their time's come they
won't have this man and they won't have that man from seventeen to
twenty-five but then afraid as the saying is that god has forgot
them and finding their bloom departing they are glad of whom they can
get and verify the fable of the parson and the pears 



letter xli

mr brand to john harlowe esq 
 enclosed in the preceding  


worthy sir my very good friend and patron 

i arrived in town yesterday after a tolerably pleasant journey
 considering the hot weather and dusty roads i put up at the bull and
gate in holborn and hastened to covent-garden i soon found the house
where the unhappy lady lodgeth and in the back shop had a good deal
of discourse with mrs smith her landlady whom i found to be so
highly prepossessed' in her favour  that i saw it would not answer
your desires to take my informations altogether' from her and being
obliged to attend my patron who to my sorrow 


 see vol vii letter lxxxi 
 transcriber's note mr brand's letters are characterized by a style
that makes excessive use of italics for emphasis although in the
remainder of clarissa i have largely disregarded italics for the sake
of plain-text formatting this style makes such emphatic use of italics
that i have indicated all such instances in his letters by placing the
italicized words and phrases in quotations thus   


 miserum et aliena vivere quadra  

i find wanteth much waiting upon and is another' sort of man than he
was at college for sir inter nos  honours change manners  for the
aforesaid causes  i thought it would best answer all the ends of the
commission with which you honoured me to engage in the desired
scrutiny the wife of a particular friend  who liveth almost
over-against the house where she lodgeth and who is a gentlewoman of
character  and sobriety  a mother of children  and one who
knoweth' the world' well 

to her i applied myself therefore and gave her a short history of the
case and desired she would very particularly inquire into the conduct'
of the unhappy young lady her present way of life' and subsistence' 
her visiters  her employments  and such-like for these sir you
know are the things whereof you wished to be informed 

accordingly sir i waited upon the gentlewoman aforesaid this day and 
to my' very great trouble because i know it will be to your's  and
likewise to all your worthy family's i must say that i do find things
look a little more darkly' than i hoped the would for alas sir the
gentlewoman's report turneth out not so favourable' for miss's
reputation as i' wished as you' wished and as every one' of her
friends wished but so it is throughout the world that one false step'
generally brings on another' and peradventure a worse  and a still
worse' till the poor limed soul' a very fit epithet of the divine
quarles's is quite entangled  and without infinite mercy lost for
ever 

it seemeth sir she is notwithstanding in a very ill state of
health  in this both' gentlewomen that is to say mrs smith her
landlady and my friend's wife agree yet she goeth often out in a
chair to prayers' as it is said but my friend's wife told me that
nothing is more common in london than that the frequenting of the church
at morning prayers is made the pretence' and cover' for private
assignations  what a sad thing is this that what was designed for
wholesome nourishment' to the poor soul  should be turned into rank
poison  but as mr daniel de foe an ingenious man though a
dissenter' observeth but indeed it is an old proverb only i think he
was the first that put it into verse 

 god never had a house of pray'r
 but satan had a chapel there 

yet to do the lady justice  nobody cometh home with her nor indeed
can' they because she goeth forward and backward in a sedan  or
chair  as they call it but then there is a gentleman of no good
character' an intimado' of mr lovelace who is a constant' visiter
of her and of the people of the house whom he regaleth' and
treateth  and hath of consequence their high good words 

i have thereupon taken the trouble for i love to be exact' in any
commission' i undertake to inquire particularly' about this
gentleman  as he is called albeit i hold no man so but by his actions 
for as juvenal saith 

 nobilitas sola est atque unica virtus' 

and this i did before' i would sit down to write to you 

his name is belford he hath a paternal estate of upwards of one
thousand pounds by the year and is now in mourning for an uncle who left
him very considerably besides he beareth a very profligate character as
to women  for i inquired particularly about that  and is mr 
lovelace's more especial privado  with whom he holdeth a regular
correspondence' and hath been often seen with miss tete a tete at the
window' in no bad way  indeed but my friend's wife is of opinion
that all is not as it should be  and indeed it is mighty strange to
me if miss be so notable a penitent' as is represented and if she
have such an aversion' to mr lovelace that she will admit his
privado' into her retirements  and see no other company 

i understand from mrs smith that mr hickman was to see her some time
ago from miss howe and i am told by another' hand you see sir how
diligent i have been to execute the commissions' you gave me that he
had no extraordinary opinion' of this belford at first though they were
seen together one morning by the opposite neighbour at breakfast' and
another time this belford was observed to watch' mr hickman's coming
from her so that as it should seem he was mighty zealous to
ingratiate' himself with mr hickman no doubt to engage him to make a
favourable report to miss howe' of the intimacy' he was admitted into
by her unhappy friend who as she is very ill' may mean no harm' in
allowing his visits for he it seemeth brought to her or recommended 
at least the doctor and apothecary that attend her but i think upon
the whole it looketh not well 

i am sorry sir i cannot give you a better account of the young lady's
prudence  but what shall we say 

 uvaque conspecta livorem ducit ab uva 

as juvenal observeth 

one thing i am afraid of which is that miss may be under necessities' 
and that this belford who as mrs smith owns hath offered her money 
which she at the time  refused may find an opportunity to take
advantage' of those necessities' and it is well observed by that poet 
that

 aegre formosam poteris servare puellam 
 nunc prece nunc pretio forma petita ruit 

and this belford who is a bold man  and hath as they say the look'
of one may make good that of horace with whose writings you are so
well acquainted nobody better 

 audax omnia perpeti 
 gens humana ruit per vetitum nefas 

forgive me sir for what i am going to write but if you could prevail
upon the rest of your family to join in the scheme which you  and her
virtuous sister  miss arabella and the archdeacon and i once talked
of which is to persuade the unhappy young lady to go in some
creditable' manner to some one of the foreign colonies it might not
save only her own credit' and reputation  but the reputation' and
credit' of all her family  and a great deal of vexation' moreover 
for it is my humble opinion that you will hardly any of you enjoy
yourselves while this once' innocent young lady is in the way of being
so frequently heard of by you and this would put her out of the way'
both of this belford' and of that lovelace  and it might 
peradventure prevent as much evil' as scandal 

you will forgive me sir for this my plainness  ovid pleadeth for me 

  adulator nullus amicus erit 

and i have no view but that of approving myself a zealous well-wisher'
to all' your worthy family whereto i owe a great number of
obligations and very particularly sir 

your obliged and humble servant 
elias brand 

wedn aug 9 


p s i shall give you farther hints' when i come down which will be in
 a few days and who my informants' were but by these' you will
 see that i have been very assiduous for the time in the task you
 set me upon 

the length' of my letter you will excuse for i need not tell you sir 
 what narrative  complex  and conversation' letters such a one
 as mine' require every one to his talent  letter-writing'
 is mine i will be bold to say and that my correspondence' was
 much coveted in the university on that account by tyros  and
 by sophs  when i was hardly a soph' myself but this i should
 not have taken upon myself to mention but only in defence of the
 length' of my letter for nobody writeth shorter' or pithier 
 when the subject requireth common forms' only but in apologizing
 for my prolixity  i am adding' to the fault  if it were one 
 which however i cannot think it to be the subject' considered 
 but this i have said before in other words so sir if you will
 excuse my post-script  i am sure you will not find fault with my
 letter 

one word more as to a matter of erudition  which you greatly love to
 hear me start' and dwell upon  dr lewen once in your'
 presence as you my good patron  cannot but remember in a
 smartish' kind of debate between him' and me  took upon him to
 censure the paranthetical' style as i call it he was a very
 learned and judicious man to be sure and an ornament to our
 function' but yet i must needs say that it is a style which i
 greatly like and the good doctor was then past his youth  and
 that time of life of consequence when a fertile imagination 
 and a rich fancy  pour in ideas so fast upon a writer that
 parentheses are often wanted and that for the sake of brevity 
 as well as perspicuity' to save the reader the trouble of reading
 a passage more than once  every man to his talent as i said
 before we are all so apt to set up our natural biasses' for
 general standards  that i wondered the less' at the worthy
 doctor's stiffness' on this occasion he smiled at me  you may
 remember sir and whether i was right or not i am sure i smiled
 at him  and you  my worthy patron  as i had the satisfaction
 to observe seemed to be of my party  but was it not strange 
 that the old gentleman' and i' should so widely differ when the
 end' with both' that is to say perspicuity' or clearness  
 was the same but what shall we say 

 errare est hominis sed non persistere 

i think i have nothing to add until i have the honour of attending you in
 person' but i am as above etc etc etc 

e b 



letter xlii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
wednesday night aug 30 


it was lucky enough that our two servants met at hannah's which gave
them so good an opportunity of exchanging their letters time enough for
each to return to his master early in the day 


 the windmill near slough 


thou dost well to boast of thy capacity for managing servants and to set
up for correcting our poets in their characters of this class of people 
when like a madman thou canst beat their teeth out and attempt to
shoot them through the head for not bringing to thee what they had no
power to obtain 


 see letter xx of this volume 


you well observe that you would have made a thorough-paced lawyer the
whole of the conversation-piece between you and the colonel affords a
convincing proof that there is a black and a white side to every cause 
but what must the conscience of a partial whitener of his own cause or
blackener of another's tell him while he is throwing dust in the eyes
of his judges and all the time knows his own guilt 


 see letter xl of this volume 


the colonel i see is far from being a faultless man but while he
sought not to carry his point by breach of faith he has an excuse which
thou hast not but with respect to him and to us all i can now with
the detestation of some of my own actions see that the taking advantage
of another person's good opinion of us to injure perhaps to ruin that
other is the most ungenerous wickedness that can be committed 

man acting thus by man we should not be at a loss to give such actions a
name but is it not doubly and trebly aggravated when such advantage is
taken of an unexperienced and innocent young creature whom we pretend to
love above all the women in the world and when we seal our pretences by
the most solemn vows and protestations of inviolable honour that we can
invent 

i see that this gentleman is the best match thou ever couldest have had 
upon all accounts his spirit such another impetuous one as thy own soon
taking fire vindictive and only differing in this that the cause he
engages in is a just one but commend me to honest brutal mowbray who 
before he knew the cause offers his sword in thy behalf against a man
who had taken the injured side and whom he had never seen before 

as soon as i had run through your letters and the copy of that of the
incendiary brand's by the latter of which i saw to what cause a great
deal of this last implacableness of the harlowe family is owing i took
coach to smith's although i had been come from thence but about an hour 
and had taken leave of the lady for the night 

i sent up for mrs lovick and desired her in the first place to
acquaint the lady who was busied in her closet that i had letters from
berks in which i was informed that the interview between colonel morden
and mr lovelace had ended without ill consequences that the colonel
intended to write to her very soon and was interesting himself mean
while in her favour with her relations that i hoped that this
agreeable news would be means of giving her good rest and i would wait
upon her in the morning by the time she should return from prayers with
all the particulars 

she sent me word that she should be glad to see me in the morning and
was highly obliged to me for the good news i had sent her up 

i then in the back shop read to mrs lovick and to mrs smith the copy
of brand's letter and asked them if they could guess at the man's
informant they were not at a loss mrs smith having seen the same
fellow brand who had talked with her as i mentioned in the former come
out of a milliner's shop over against them which milliner she said had
also lately been very inquisitive about the lady 


 see vol vii letter lxxxi 


i wanted no farther hint but bidding them take no notice to the lady of
what i had read i shot over the way and asking for the mistress of the
house she came to me 

retiring with her at her invitation into her parlour i desired to know
if she were acquainted with a young country clergyman of the name of
brand she hesitatingly seeing me in some emotion owned that she had
some small knowledge of the gentleman just then came in her husband 
who is it seems a petty officer of excise and not an ill-behaved
man who owned a fuller knowledge of him 

i have the copy of a letter said i from this brand in which he has
taken great liberties with my character and with that of the most
unblamable lady in the world which he grounds upon information that you 
madam have given him and then i read to them several passages in his
letter and asked what foundation she had for giving that fellow such
impressions of either of us 

they knew not what to answer but at last said that he had told them how
wickedly the young lady had run away from her parents what worthy and
rich people they were in what favour he stood with them and that they
had employed him to inquire after her behaviour visiters etc 

they said that indeed they knew very little of the young lady but that
 curse upon their censoriousness   it was but too natural to think that 
where a lady had given way to a delusion and taken so wrong a step she
would not stop there that the most sacred places and things were but too
often made clokes for bad actions that mr brand had been informed
 perhaps by some enemy of mine that i was a man of very free principles 
and an intimado as he calls it of the man who had ruined her and that
their cousin barker a manteau-maker who lodged up one pair of stairs 
 and who at their desire came down and confirmed what they said had
often from her window seen me with the lady in her chamber and both
talking very earnestly together and that mr brand being unable to
account for her admiring my visits and knowing i was but a new
acquaintance of her's and an old one of mr lovelace thought himself
obliged to lay these matters before her friends 

this was the sum and substance of their tale o how i cursed the
censoriousness of this plaguy triumvirate a parson a milliner and a
mantua-maker the two latter not more by business led to adorn the
persons than generally by scandal to destroy the reputations of those
they have a mind to exercise their talents upon 

the two women took great pains to persuade me that they themselves were
people of conscience of consequence i told them too much addicted i
feared to censure other people who pretended not to their strictness 
for that i had ever found censoriousness with those who affected to be
thought more pious than their neighbours 

they answered that that was not their case and that they had since
inquired into the lady's character and manner of life and were very much
concerned to think any thing they had said should be made use of against
her and as they heard from mrs smith that she was not likely to live
long they should be sorry she should go out of the world a sufferer by
their means or with an ill opinion of them though strangers to her 
the husband offered to write if i pleased to mr brand in vindication
of the lady and the two women said they should be glad to wait upon her
in person to beg her pardon for any thing she had reason to take amiss
from them because they were now convinced that there was not such
another young lady in the world 

i told them that the least said of the affair to the lady in her present
circumstances was best that she was a heavenly creature and fond of
taking all occasions to find excuses for her relations on their
implacableness to her that therefore i should take some notice to her of
the uncharitable and weak surmises which gave birth to so vile a scandal 
but that i would have him mr walton for that is the husband's name 
write to his acquaintance brand as soon as possible as he had offered 
and so i left them 

as to what thou sayest of thy charming cousin let me know if thou hast
any meaning in it i have not the vanity to think myself deserving of
such a lady as miss montague and should not therefore care to expose
myself to her scorn and to thy derision but were i assured i might
avoid both of these i would soon acquaint thee that i should think no
pains nor assiduity too much to obtain a share in the good graces of such
a lady 

but i know thee too well to depend upon any thing thou sayest on this
subject thou lovest to make thy friends the objects of ridicule to
ladies and imaginest from the vanity and in this respect i will say
littleness of thine own heart that thou shinest the brighter for the
foil 

thus didst thou once play off the rough mowbray with miss hatton till
the poor fellow knew not how to go either backward or forward 



letter xliii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
thursday 11 o'clock aug 31 


i am just come from the lady whom i left cheerful and serene 

she thanked me for my communication of the preceding night i read to
her such parts of your letters as i could read to her and i thought it
was a good test to distinguish the froth and whipt-syllabub in them from
the cream in what one could and could not read to a woman of so fine a
mind since four parts out of six of thy letters which i thought
entertaining as i read them to myself appeared to me when i should have
read them to her most abominable stuff and gave me a very contemptible
idea of thy talents and of my own judgment 

she as far from rejoicing as i had done at the disappointment her
letter gave you when explained 

she said she meant only an innocent allegory which might carry
instruction and warning to you when the meaning was taken as well as
answer her own hopes for the time it was run off in a hurry she was
afraid it was not quite right in her but hoped the end would excuse if
it could not justify the means and then she again expressed a good
deal of apprehension lest you should still take it into your head to
molest her when her time she said was so short that she wanted every
moment of it repeating what she had once said before that when she
wrote she was so ill that she believed she should not have lived till
now if she had thought she should she must have studied for an
expedient that would have better answered her intentions hinting at a
removal out of the knowledge of us both 

but she was much pleased that the conference between you and colonel
morden after two or three such violent sallies as i acquainted her you
had had between you ended so amicably and said she must absolutely
depend upon the promise i had given her to use my utmost endeavours to
prevent farther mischief on her account 

she was pleased with the justice you did her character to her cousin 

she was glad to hear that he had so kind an opinion of her and that he
would write to her 

i was under an unnecessary concern how to break to her that i had the
copy of brand's vile letter unnecessary i say for she took it just as
you thought she would as an excuse she wished to have for the
implacableness of her friends and begged i would let her read it
herself for said she the contents cannot disturb me be they what they
will 

i gave it to her and she read it to herself a tear now and then being
ready to start and a sigh sometimes interposing 

she gave me back the letter with great and surprising calmness 
considering the subject 

there was a time said she and that not long since when such a letter
as this would have greatly pained me but i hope i have now go above all
these things and i can refer to your kind offices and to those of miss
howe the justice that will be done to my memory among my friends there
is a good and a bad light in which every thing that befalls us may be
taken if the human mind will busy itself to make the worst of every
disagreeable occurrence it will never want woe this letter affecting
as the subject of it is to my reputation gives me more pleasure than
pain because i can gather from it that had not my friends been
prepossessed by misinformed or rash and officious persons who are always
at hand to flatter or soothe the passions of the affluent they could not
have been so immovably determined against me but now they are
sufficiently cleared from every imputation of unforgivingness for while
i appeared to them in the character of a vile hypocrite pretending to
true penitence yet giving up myself to profligate courses how could i
expect either their pardon or blessing 

but madam said i you'll see by the date of this letter that their
severity previous to that cannot be excused by it 

it imports me much replied she on account of my present wishes as to
the office you are so kind to undertake that you should not think
harshly of my friends i must own to you that i have been apt sometimes
myself to think them not only severe but cruel suffering minds will be
partial to their own cause and merits knowing their own hearts if
sincere they are apt to murmur when harshly treated but if they are
not believed to be innocent by persons who have a right to decide upon
their conduct according to their own judgments how can it be helped 
besides sir how do you know that there are not about my friends as
well-meaning misrepresenters as mr brand really seems to be but be
this as it will there is no doubt that there are and have been
multitudes of persons as innocent as myself who have suffered upon
surmises as little probable as those on which mr brand founds his
judgment your intimacy sir with mr lovelace and may i say a
character which it seems you have been less solicitous formerly to
justify than perhaps you will be for the future and your frequent visits
to me may well be thought to be questionable circumstances in my conduct 

i could only admire her in silence 

but you see sir proceeded she how necessary it is for young people of
our sex to be careful of our company and how much at the same time it
behoves young persons of your's to be chary of their own reputation were
it only for the sake of such of our's as they may mean honourably by and
who otherwise may suffer in their good names for being seen in their
company 

as to mr brand continued she he is to be pitied and let me enjoin
you mr belford not to take any resentments against him which may be
detrimental either to his person or his fortunes let his function and
his good meaning plead for him he will have concern enough when he
finds every body whose displeasure i now labour under acquitting my
memory of perverse guilt and joining in a general pity for me 

this lovelace is the woman whose life thou hast curtailed in the
blossom of it how many opportunities must thou have had of admiring her
inestimable worth yet couldst have thy senses so much absorbed in the
woman in her charming person as to be blind to the angel that shines
out in such full glory in her mind indeed i have ever thought myself 
when blest with her conversation in the company of a real angel and i
am sure it would be impossible for me were she to be as beautiful and
as crimsoned over with health as i have seen her to have the least
thought of sex when i heard her talk 


thursday three o'clock aug 31 

on my re-visit to the lady i found her almost as much a sufferer from
joy as she had sometimes been from grief for she had just received a
very kind letter from her cousin morden which she was so good as to
communicate to me as she had already begun to answer it i begged leave
to attend her in the evening that i might not interrupt her in it 

the letter is a very tender one 

 here mr belford gives the substance of it upon his memory but that is
 omitted as the letter is given at length see the next letter 
 and then adds  

but alas all will be now too late for the decree is certainly gone
out the world is unworthy of her 



letter xliv

colonel morden to miss clarissa harlowe
tuesday aug 29 


i should not my dearest cousin have been a fortnight in england 
without either doing myself the honour of waiting upon you in person or
of writing to you if i had not been busying myself almost all the time
in your service in hopes of making my visit or letter still more
acceptable to you acceptable as i have reason to presume either will be
from the unquestionable love i ever bore you and from the esteem you
always honoured me with 

little did i think that so many days would have been required to effect
my well-intended purpose where there used to be a love so ardent on one
side and where there still is as i am thoroughly convinced the most
exalted merit on the other 

i was yesterday with mr lovelace and lord m i need not tell you it
seems how very desirous the whole family and all the relations of that
nobleman are of the honour of an alliance with you nor how exceedingly
earnest the ungrateful man is to make you all the reparation in his
power 

i think my dear cousin that you cannot now do better than to give him
the honour of your hand he says just and great things of your virtue 
and so heartily condemns himself that i think there is honorable room
for you to forgive him and the more room as it seems you are determined
against a legal prosecution 

your effectual forgiveness of mr lovelace it is evident to me will
accelerate a general reconciliation for at present my other cousins
cannot persuade themselves that he is in earnest to do you justice or
that you would refuse him if you believed he was 

but my dear cousin there may possibly be something in this affair to
which i may be a stranger if there be and you will acquaint me with
it all that a naturally-warm heart can do in your behalf shall be done 

i hope i shall be able in my next visits to my several cousins to set
all right with them haughty spirits when convinced that they have
carried resentments too high want but a good excuse to condescend and
parents must always love the child they once loved 

but if i find them inflexible i will set out and attend you without
delay for i long to see you after so many years' absence 

mean while i beg the favour of a few lines to know if you have reason
to doubt mr lovelace's sincerity for my part i can have none if i am
to judge from the conversation that passed between us yesterday in
presence of lord m 

you will be pleased to direct for me at your uncle antony's 

permit me my dearest cousin till i can procure a happy reconciliation
between you and your father and brother and uncles to supply the place
to you of all those near relations as well as that of

your affectionate kinsman and humble servant 
wm morden 



letter xlv

miss clarissa harlowe to wm morden esq 
thursday aug 31 


i most heartily congratulate you dear sir on your return to your native
country 

i heard with much pleasure that you were come but i was both afraid and
ashamed till you encouraged me by a first notice to address myself to
you 

how consoling is it to my wounded heart to find that you have not been
carried away by that tide of resentment and displeasure with which i have
been so unhappily overwhelmed but that while my still nearer relations
have not thought fit to examine into the truth of vile reports raised
against me you have informed yourself of my innocence and generously
credited the information 

i have not the least reason to doubt mr lovelace's sincerity in his
offers of marriage nor that all his relations are heartily desirous of
ranking me among them i have had noble instances of their esteem for
me on their apprehending that my father's displeasure must have had
absolutely refused their pressing solicitations in their kinsman's favour
as well as his own 

nor think me my dear cousin blamable for refusing him i had given mr 
lovelace no reason to think me a weak creature if i had a man of his
character might have thought himself warranted to endeavour to take
ungenerous advantage of the weakness he had been able to inspire the
consciousness of my own weakness in that case might have brought me to
a composition with his wickedness 

i can indeed forgive him but that is because i think his crimes have
set me above him can i be above the man sir to whom i shall give my
hand and my vows and with them a sanction to the most premeditated
baseness no sir let me say that your cousin clarissa were she
likely to live many years and that if she married not this man in
penury or want despised and forsaken by all her friends puts not so
high a value upon the conveniencies of life nor upon life itself as to
seek to re-obtain the one or to preserve the other by giving such a
sanction a sanction which were she to perform her duty would reward
the violator 

nor is it so much from pride as from principle that i say this what 
sir when virtue when chastity is the crown of a woman and
particularly of a wife shall form an attempt upon her's but upon a
presumption that she was capable of receiving his offered hand when he
had found himself mistaken in the vile opinion he had conceived of her 
hitherto he has not had reason to think me weak nor will i give an
instance so flagrant that weak i am in a point in which it would be
criminal to be found weak 

one day sir you will perhaps know all my story but whenever it is
known i beg that the author of my calamities may not be vindictively
sought after he could not have been the author of them but for a
strange concurrence of unhappy causes as the law will not be able to
reach him when i am gone the apprehension of any other sort of vengeance
terrifies me since in such a case should my friends be safe what
honour would his death bring to my memory if any of them should come to
misfortune how would my fault be aggravated 

god long preserve you my dearest cousin and bless you but in proportion
to the consolation you have given me in letting me know that you still
love me and that i have one near and dear relation who can pity and
forgive me and then you will be greatly blessed is the prayer of

your ever grateful and affectionate
cl harlowe 



letter xlvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
 in answer to his letters xxiii xxxvii of this volume  
thursday aug 31 


i cannot but own that i am cut to the heart by this miss harlowe's
interpretation of her letter she ought never to be forgiven she a
meek person and a penitent and innocent and pious and i know not
what who can deceive with a foot in the grave 

tis evident that she sat down to write this letter with a design to
mislead and deceive and if she be capable of that at such a crisis 
she has as much need of heaven's forgiveness as i have of her's and 
with all her cant of charity and charity if she be not more sure of it
than i am of her real pardon and if she take the thing in the light she
ought to take it in she will have a few darker moments yet to come than
she seems to expect 

lord m himself who is not one of those to speak in his own phrase who
can penetrate a millstone sees the deceit and thinks it unworthy of
her though my cousins montague vindicate her and no wonder this cursed
partial sex  i hate em all by my soul i hate em all   will never
allow any thing against an individual of it where our's is concerned 
and why because if they censure deceit in another they must condemn
their own hearts 

she is to send me a letter after she is in heaven is she the devil
take such allegories and the devil take thee for calling this absurdity
an innocent artifice 

i insist upon it that if a woman of her character at such a critical
time is to be justified in such a deception a man in full health and
vigour of body and mind as i am may be excused for all his stratagems
and attempts against her and thank my stars i can now sit me down
with a quiet conscience on that score by my soul i can jack nor has
any body who can acquit her a right to blame me but with some 
indeed every thing she does must be good every thing i do must be bad 
and why because she has always taken care to coax the stupid misjudging
world like a woman while i have constantly defied and despised its
censures like a man 

but notwithstanding all you may let her know from me that i will not
molest her since my visits would be so shocking to her and i hope she
will take this into her consideration as a piece of generosity which she
could hardly expect after the deception she has put upon me and let her
farther know that if there be any thing in my power that will
contribute either to her ease or honour i will obey her at the very
first intimation however disgraceful or detrimental to myself all
this to make her unapprehensive and that she may have nothing to pull
her back 

if her cursed relations could be brought as cheerfully to perform their
parts i'd answer life for life for her recovery 

but who that has so many ludicrous images raised in his mind by the
awkward penitence can forbear laughing at thee spare i beseech thee 
dear belford for the future all thine own aspirations if thou wouldst
not dishonour those of an angel indeed 

when i came to that passage where thou sayest that thou considerest her 
as one sent from heaven to draw thee after her for the heart of me i
could not for an hour put thee out of my head in the attitude of dame
elizabeth carteret on her monument in westminster abbey if thou never
observedst it go thither on purpose and there wilt thou see this dame
in effigy with uplifted head and hand the latter taken hold of by a
cupid every inch of stone one clumsy foot lifted up also aiming as the
sculptor designed it to ascend but so executed as would rather make
one imagine that the figure without shoe or stocking as it is though
the rest of the body is robed was looking up to its corn-cutter the
other riveted to its native earth bemired like thee immersed thou
callest it beyond the possibility of unsticking itself both figures 
thou wilt find seem to be in a contention the bigger whether it should
pull down the lesser about its ears the lesser a chubby fat little
varlet of a fourth part of the other's bigness with wings not much
larger than those of a butterfly whether it should raise the larger to a
heaven it points to hardly big enough to contain the great toes of
either 


 see letter xxxvii of this volume 


thou wilt say perhaps that the dame's figure in stone may do credit in
the comparison to thine both in grain and shape wooden as thou art all
over but that the lady who in every thing but in the trick she has
played me so lately is truly an angel is but sorrily represented by the
fat-flanked cupid this i allow thee but yet there is enough in thy
aspirations to strike my mind with a resemblance of thee and the lady to
the figures on the wretched monument for thou oughtest to remember 
that prepared as she may be to mount to her native skies it is
impossible for her to draw after her a heavy fellow who has so much to
repent of as thou hast 

but now to be serious once more let me tell you belford that if the
lady be really so ill as you write she is it will become you  no roman
style here   in a case so very affecting to be a little less pointed and
sarcastic in your reflections for upon my soul the matter begins to
grate me most confoundedly 

i am now so impatient to hear oftener of her that i take the hint
accidentally given me by our two fellows meeting at slough and resolve
to go to our friend doleman's at uxbridge whose wife and sister as well
as he have so frequently pressed me to give them my company for a week
or two there shall i be within two hours' ride if any thing should
happen to induce her to see me for it will well become her piety and
avowed charity should the worst happen  the lord of heaven and earth 
however avert that worst   to give me that pardon from her lips which
she has not denied to me by pen and ink and as she wishes my
reformation she knows not what good effects such an interview may have
upon me 

i shall accordingly be at doleman's to-morrow morning by eleven at
farthest my fellow will find me there at his return from you with a
letter i hope i shall have joel with me likewise that i may send
the oftener as matters fall out were i to be still nearer or in town 
it would be impossible to withhold myself from seeing her 

but if the worst happen as by your continual knelling i know not
what to think of it  yet once more heaven avert that worst how
natural it is to pray when once cannot help one's self   then say not 
in so many dreadful words what the event is only that you advise me to
take a trip to paris and that will stab me to the heart 


 


i so well approve of your generosity to poor belton's sister that i have
made mowbray give up his legacy as i do mine towards her india bonds 
when i come to town tourville shall do the like and we will buy each a
ring to wear in memory of the honest fellow with our own money that we
may perform his will as well as our own 

my fellow rides the rest of the night i charge you jack if you would
save his life that you send him not back empty-handed 



letter xlvii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
tuesday night aug 30 


when i concluded my last i hoped that my next attendance upon this
surprising lady would furnish me with some particulars as agreeable as
now could be hoped for from the declining way she is in by reason of
the welcome letter she had received from her cousin morden but it
proved quite otherwise to me though not to herself for i think i was
never more shocked in my life than on the occasion i shall mention
presently 

when i attended her about seven in the evening she told me that she
found herself in a very petulant way after i had left her strange said
she that the pleasure i received from my cousin's letter should have
such an effect upon me but i could not help giving way to a comparative
humour as i may call it and to think it very hard that my nearer
relations did not take the methods which my cousin morden kindly took by
inquiring into my merit or demerit and giving my cause a fair audit
before they proceeded to condemnation 

she had hardly said this when she started and a blush overspread her
sweet face on hearing as i also did a sort of lumbering noise upon the
stairs as if a large trunk were bringing up between two people and 
looking upon me with an eye of concern blunderers said she they have
brought in something two hours before the time don't be surprised sir
 it is all to save you trouble 

before i could speak in came mrs smith o madam said she what have
you done mrs lovick entering made the same exclamation lord have
mercy upon me madam cried i what have you done for she stepping at
the same instant to the door the women told me it was a coffin o
lovelace that thou hadst been there at that moment thou the causer of
all these shocking scenes surely thou couldst not have been less
affected than i who have no guilt as to her to answer for 

with an intrepidity of a piece with the preparation having directed them
to carry it to her bed-chamber she returned to us they were not to have
brought it in till after dark said she pray excuse me mr belford 
and don't you mrs lovick be concerned nor you mrs smith why
should you there is nothing more in it than the unusualness of the
thing why may we not be as reasonably shocked at going to church where
are the monuments of our ancestors with whose dust we even hope our dust
shall be one day mingled as to be moved at such a sight as this 

we all remaining silent the women having their aprons at their eyes why
this concern for nothing at all said she if i am to be blamed for any
thing it is for showing too much solicitude as it may be thought for
this earthly part i love to do every thing for myself that i can do i
ever did every other material point is so far done and taken care of 
that i have had leisure for things of lesser moment minutenesses may be
observed where greater articles are not neglected for them i might
have had this to order perhaps when less fit to order it i have no
mother no sister no mrs norton no miss howe near me some of you
must have seen this in a few days if not now perhaps have had the
friendly trouble of directing it and what is the difference of a few
days to you when i am gratified rather than discomposed by it i shall
not die the sooner for such a preparation should not every body that
has any thing to bequeath make their will and who that makes a will 
should be afraid of a coffin my dear friends  to the women  i have
considered these things do not with such an object before you as you
have had in me for weeks give me reason to think you have not 

how reasonable was all this it showed indeed that she herself had
well considered it but yet we could not help being shocked at the
thoughts of the coffin thus brought in the lovely person before our
eyes who is in all likelihood so soon to fill it 

we were all silent still the women in grief i in a manner stunned she
would not ask me she said but would be glad since it had thus earlier
than she had intended been brought in that her two good friends would
walk in and look upon it they would be less shocked when it was made
more familiar to their eye don't you lead back said she a starting
steed to the object he is apt to start at in order to familiarize him to
it and cure his starting the same reason will hold in this case come 
my good friends i will lead you in 

i took my leave telling her she had done wrong very wrong and ought
not by any means to have such an object before her 

the women followed her in tis a strange sex nothing is too shocking
for them to look upon or see acted that has but novelty and curiosity
in it 

down i posted got a chair and was carried home extremely shocked and
discomposed yet weighing the lady's arguments i know not why i was so
affected except as she said at the unusualness of the thing 

while i waited for a chair mrs smith came down and told me that there
were devices and inscriptions upon the lid lord bless me is a coffin a
proper subject to display fancy upon but these great minds cannot avoid
doing extraordinary things 



letter xlviii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
friday morn sept 1 


it is surprising that i a man should be so much affected as i was at
such an object as is the subject of my former letter who also in my
late uncle's case and poor belton's had the like before me and the
directing of it when she a woman of so weak and tender a frame who
was to fill it so soon perhaps to fill it could give orders about it 
and draw out the devices upon it and explain them with so little concern
as the women tell me she did to them last night after i was gone 

i really was ill and restless all night thou wert the subject of my
execration as she was of my admiration all the time i was quite awake 
and when i dozed i dreamt of nothing but of flying hour-glasses 
deaths-heads spades mattocks and eternity the hint of her devices as
given me by mrs smith running in my head 

however not being able to keep away from smith's i went thither about
seven the lady was just gone out she had slept better i found than
i though her solemn repository was under her window not far from her
bed-side 

i was prevailed upon by mrs smith and her nurse shelburne mrs lovick
being abroad with her to go up and look at the devices mrs lovick has
since shown me a copy of the draught by which all was ordered and i will
give thee a sketch of the symbols 

the principal device neatly etched on a plate of white metal is a
crowned serpent with its tail in its mouth forming a ring the emblem
of eternity and in the circle made by it is this inscription 

 clarissa harlowe 

 april x 

  then the year  

 aetat xix 

for ornaments at top an hour-glass winged at bottom an urn 

under the hour-glass on another plate this inscription 

 here the wicked cease from troubling and here the
 weary be at rest job iii 17 

over the urn near the bottom 

 turn again unto thy rest o my soul for the lord hath
 rewarded thee and why thou hast delivered my
 soul from death mine eyes from tears and my feet
 from falling ps cxvi 7 8 

over this is the head of a white lily snapt short off and just falling
from the stalk and this inscription over that between the principal
plate and the lily 

 the days of man are but as grass for he flourisheth as a
 flower of the field for as soon as the wind goeth over
 it it is gone and the place thereof shall know it no
 more ps ciii 15 16 

she excused herself to the women on the score of her youth and being
used to draw for her needleworks for having shown more fancy than would
perhaps be thought suitable on so solemn an occasion 

the date april 10 she accounted for as not being able to tell what her
closing-day would be and as that was the fatal day of her leaving her
father's house 

she discharged the undertaker's bill after i went away with as much
cheerfulness as she could ever have paid for the clothes she sold to
purchase this her palace for such she called it reflecting upon herself
for the expensiveness of it saying that they might observe in her that
pride left not poor mortals to the last but indeed she did not know but
her father would permit it when furnished to be carried down to be
deposited with her ancestors and in that case she ought not to
discredit those ancestors in her appearance amongst them 

it is covered with fine black cloth and lined with white satin soon 
she said to be tarnished with viler earth than any it could be covered
by 

the burial-dress was brought home with it the women had curiosity
enough i suppose to see her open that if she did open it and 
perhaps thou wouldst have been glad to have been present to have admired
it too 

mrs lovick said she took the liberty to blame her and wished the
removal of such an object from her bed-chamber at least and was so
affected with the noble answer she made upon it that she entered it down
the moment she left her 

to persons in health said she this sight may be shocking and the
preparation and my unconcernedness in it may appear affected but to
me who have had so gradual a weaning-time from the world and so much
reason not to love it i must say i dwell on i indulge and strictly
speaking i enjoy the thoughts of death for believe me   looking
stedfastly at the awful receptacle   believe what at this instant i feel
to be most true that there is such a vast superiority of weight and
importance in the thought of death and its hoped-for happy consequences 
that it in a manner annihilates all other considerations and concerns 
believe me my good friends it does what nothing else can do it teaches
me by strengthening in me the force of the divinest example to forgive
the injuries i have received and shuts out the remembrance of past evils
from my soul 

and now let me ask thee lovelace dost thou think that when the time
shall come that thou shalt be obliged to launch into the boundless ocean
of eternity thou wilt be able any more than poor belton to act thy
part with such true heroism as this sweet and tender blossom of a woman
has manifested and continues to manifest 

oh no it cannot be and why can't it be the reason is evident she
has no wilful errors to look back upon with self-reproach and her mind
is strengthened by the consolations which flow from that religious
rectitude which has been the guide of all her actions and which has
taught her rather to choose to be a sufferer than an aggressor 

this was the support of the divine socrates as thou hast read when led
to execution his wife lamenting that he should suffer being innocent 
thou fool said he wouldst thou wish me to be guilty 



letter xlix

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
friday sept 1 


how astonishing in the midst of such affecting scenes is thy mirth on
what thou callest my own aspirations never surely was there such
another man in this world thy talents and thy levity taken together 
surely what i shall send thee with this will affect thee if not 
nothing can till thy own hour come and heavy will then thy reflections
be 

i am glad however that thou enablest me to assure the lady that thou
wilt no more molest her that is to say in other words that after
having ruined her fortunes and all her worldly prospects thou wilt be
so gracious as to let her lie down and die in peace 

thy giving up to poor belton's sister the little legacy and thy
undertaking to make mowbray and tourville follow thy example are i must
say to thy honour of a piece with thy generosity to thy rose-bud and her
johnny and to a number of other good actions in pecuniary matters 
although thy rose-bud's is i believe the only instance where a pretty
woman was concerned of such a disinterested bounty 

upon my faith lovelace i love to praise thee and often and often as
thou knowest have i studied for occasions to do it insomuch that when 
for the life of me i could not think of any thing done by thee that
deserved praise i have taken pains to applaud the not ungraceful manner
in which thou hast performed actions that merited the gallows 

now thou art so near i will dispatch my servant to thee if occasion
requires but i fear i shall soon give thee the news thou art
apprehensive of for i am just now sent for by mrs smith who has
ordered the messenger to tell me that she knew not if the lady will be
alive when i come 


friday sept 1 two o'clock at smith's 

i could not close my letter in such an uncertainty as must have added to
your impatience for you have on several occasions convinced me that
the suspense you love to give would be the greatest torment to you that
you could receive a common case with all aggressive and violent
spirits i believe i will just mention then your servant waiting here
till i have written that the lady has had two very severe fits in the
last of which whilst she lay they sent to the doctor and mr goddard 
who both advised that a messenger should be dispatched for me as her
executor being doubtful whether if she had a third it would not carry
her off 

she was tolerably recovered by the time i cane and the doctor made her
promise before me that while she was so weak she would not attempt any
more to go abroad for by mrs lovick's description who attended her 
the shortness of her breath her extreme weakness and the fervour of her
devotions when at church were contraries which pulling different ways
 the soul aspiring the body sinking tore her tender frame in pieces 

so much for the present i shall detain will no longer than just to beg
that you will send me back this packet and the last your memory is so
good that once reading is all you ever give or need to give to any
thing and who but ourselves can make out our characters were you
inclined to let any body see what passes between us if i cannot be
obliged i shall be tempted to withhold what i write till i have time to
take a copy of it 


 it may not be amiss to observe that mr belford's solicitude to get
back his letters was owing to his desire of fulfilling the lady's wishes
that he would furnish miss howe with materials to vindicate her memory 


a letter from miss howe is just now brought by a particular messenger 
who says he must carry back a few lines in return but as the lady is
just retired to lie down the man is to call again by-and-by 



letter l

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
uxbridge sept 1 twelve o'clock at night 


i send you the papers with this you must account to me honestly and
fairly when i see you for the earnestness with which you write for
them and then also will we talk about the contents of your last
dispatch and about some of your severe and unfriendly reflections 

mean time whatever thou dost don't let the wonderful creature leave us 
set before her the sin of her preparation as if she thought she could
depart when she pleased she'll persuade herself at this rate that she
has nothing to do when all is ready but to lie down and go to sleep 
and such a lively fancy as her's will make a reality of a jest at any
time 

a jest i call all that has passed between her and me a mere jest to die
for for has not her triumph over me from first to last been infinitely
greater than her sufferings from me 

would the sacred regard i have for her purity even for her personal as
well as intellectual purity permit i could prove this as clear as the
sun tell therefore the dear creature that she must not be wicked in
her piety there is a too much as well as too little even in
righteousness perhaps she does not think of that oh that she would
have permitted my attendance as obligingly as she does of thine the
dear soul used to love humour i remember the time that she knew how to
smile at a piece of apropos humour and let me tell thee a smile upon
the lips or a sparkling in the eye must have had its correspondent
cheerfulness in a heart so sincere as her's 

tell the doctor i will make over all my possessions and all my
reversions to him if he will but prolong her life for one twelvemonth
to come but for one twelvemonth jack he will lose all his reputation
with me and i shall treat him as belton did his doctor if he cannot do
this for me on so young a subject but nineteen belford nineteen
cannot so soon die of grief if the doctor deserve that title and so
blooming and so fine a constitution as she had but three or four months
ago 

but what need the doctor to ask her leave to write to her friends could
he not have done it without letting her know any thing of the matter 
that was one of the likeliest means that could be thought of to bring
some of them about her since she is so desirous to see them at least
it would have induced them to send up her favourite norton but these
plaguy solemn fellows are great traders in parade they'll cram down
your throat their poisonous drugs by wholesale without asking you a
question and have the assurance to own it to be prescribing but when
they are to do good they are to require your consent 

how the dear creature's character rises in every line of thy letters 
but it is owing to the uncommon occasions she has met with that she
blazes out upon us with such a meridian lustre how but for those
occasions could her noble sentiments her prudent consideration her
forgiving spirit her exalted benevolence and her equanimity in view of
the most shocking prospects which set her in a light so superior to all
her sex and even to the philosophers of antiquity have been manifested 

i know thou wilt think i am going to claim some merit to myself for
having given her such opportunities of signalizing her virtues but i am
not for if i did i must share that merit with her implacable
relations who would justly be entitled to two-thirds of it at least 
and my soul disdains a partnership in any thing with such a family 

but this i mention as an answer to thy reproaches that i could be so
little edified by perfections to which thou supposest i was for so
long together daily and hourly a personal witness when admirable as she
was in all she said and in all she did occasion had not at that time
ripened and called forth those amazing perfections which now astonish
and confound me 

hence it is that i admire her more than ever and that my love for her is
less personal as i may say more intellectual than ever i thought it
could be to a woman 

hence also it is that i am confident would it please the fates to spare
her and make her mine i could love her with a purity that would draw on
my own future as well as ensure her temporal happiness and hence by
necessary consequence shall i be the most miserable of all men if i am
deprived of her 

thou severely reflectest upon me for my levity the abbey instance in
thine eye i suppose and i will be ingenuous enough to own that as
thou seest not my heart there may be passages in every one of my
letters which the melancholy occasion considered deserve thy most
pointed rebukes but faith jack thou art such a tragi-comical mortal 
with thy leaden aspirations at one time and thy flying hour-glasses and
dreaming terrors at another that as prior says what serious is thou
turn'st to farce and it is impossible to keep within the bounds of
decorum or gravity when one reads what thou writest 

but to restrain myself for my constitutional gayety was ready to run
away with me again i will repeat i must ever repeat that i am most
egregiously affected with the circumstances of the case and were this
paragon actually to quit the world should never enjoy myself one hour
together though i were to live to the age of methusalem 

indeed it is to this deep concern that my levity is owing for i
struggle and struggle and try to buffet down my cruel reflections as
they rise and when i cannot i am forced as i have often said to try
to make myself laugh that i may not cry for one or other i must do and
is it not philosophy carried to the highest pitch for a man to conquer
such tumults of soul as i am sometimes agitated by and in the very
height of the storm to be able to quaver out an horse-laugh 

your seneca's your epictetus's and the rest of your stoical tribe with
all their apathy nonsense could not come up to this they could forbear
wry faces bodily pains they could well enough seem to support and that
was all but the pangs of their own smitten-down souls they could not
laugh over though they could at the follies of others they read grave
lectures but they were grave this high point of philosophy to laugh
and be merry in the midst of the most soul-harrowing woes when the
heart-strings are just bursting asunder was reserved for thy lovelace 

there is something owing to constitution i own and that this is the
laughing-time of my life for what a woe must that be which for an hour
together can mortify a man six or seven and twenty in high blood and
spirits of a naturally gay disposition who can sing dance and
scribble and take and give delight in them all but then my grief as
my joy is sharper-pointed than most other men's and like what dolly
welby once told me describing the parturient throes if there were not
lucid intervals if they did not come and go there would be no bearing
them 


 


after all as i am so little distant from the dear creature and as she
is so very ill i think i cannot excuse myself from making her one visit 
nevertheless if i thought her so near  what word shall i use that my
soul is not shocked at   and that she would be too much discomposed by a
visit i would not think of it yet how can i bear the recollection 
that when she last went from me her innocence so triumphant over my
premeditated guilt as was enough to reconcile her to life and to set
her above the sense of injuries so nobly sustained that she should then
depart with an incurable fracture in her heart and that that should be
the last time i should ever see her how how can i bear this
reflection 

o jack how my conscience that gives edge even to thy blunt reflections 
tears me even this moment would i give the world to push the cruel
reproacher from me by one ray of my usual gayety sick of myself sick
of the remembrance of my vile plots and of my light my momentary
ecstacy  villanous burglar felon thief that i was   which has brought
on me such durable and such heavy remorse what would i give that i had
not been guilty of such barbarous and ungrateful perfidy to the most
excellent of god's creatures 

i would end methinks with one sprightlier line but it will not be 
let me tell thee then and rejoice at it if thou wilt that i am

inexpressibly miserable 



letter li

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
sat morning sept 2 


i have some little pleasure given me by thine just now brought me i
see now that thou hast a little humanity left would to heaven for the
dear lady's sake as well as for thy own that thou hadst rummaged it up
from all the dark forgotten corners of thy soul a little sooner 

the lady is alive and serene and calm and has all her noble intellects
clear and strong but nineteen will not however save her she says she
will now content herself with her closet duties and the visits of the
parish-minister and will not attempt to go out nor indeed will she 
i am afraid ever walk up or down a pair of stairs again 

i am sorry at my soul to have this to say but it would be a folly to
flatter thee 

as to thy seeing her i believe the least hint of that sort now would
cut off some hours of her life 

what has contributed to her serenity it seems is that taking the alarm
her fits gave her she has entirely finished and signed and sealed her
last will which she had deferred till this time in hopes as she said 
of some good news from harlowe-place which would have induced her to
alter some passages in it 

miss howe's letter was not given her till four in the afternoon 
yesterday at which time the messenger returned for an answer she
admitted him into her presence in the dining-room ill as she then was 
and she would have written a few lines as desired by miss howe but not
being able to hold a pen she bid the messenger tell her that she hoped
to be well enough to write a long letter by the next day's post and
would not now detain him 


 


saturday six in the afternoon 

i called just now and found the lady writing to miss howe she made me
a melancholy compliment that she showed me not miss howe's letter 
because i should soon have that and all her papers before me but she
told me that miss howe had very considerably obviated to colonel morden
several things which might have occasioned misapprehensions between him
and me and had likewise put a lighter construction for the sake of
peace on some of your actions than they deserved 

she added that her cousin morden was warmly engaged in her favour with
her friends and one good piece of news miss howe's letter contained 
that her father would give up some matters which appertaining to her of
right would make my executorship the easier in some particulars that had
given her a little pain 

she owned she had been obliged to leave off in the letter she was
writing through weakness 

will says he shall reach you to-night i shall send in the morning 
and if i find her not worse will ride to edgware and return in the
afternoon 



letter lii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
tuesday aug 29 


my dearest friend 

we are at length returned to our own home i had intended to wait on you
in london but my mother is very ill alas my dear she is very ill
indeed and you are likewise very ill i see that by your's of the 25th 
what shall i do if i lose two such near and dear and tender friends 
she was taken ill yesterday at our last stage in our return home and has
a violent surfeit and fever and the doctors are doubtful about her 

if she should die how will all my pertnesses to her fly in my face 
why why did i ever vex her she says i have been all duty and
obedience she kindly forgets all my faults and remembers every thing i
have been so happy as to oblige her in and this cuts me to the heart 

i see i see my dear that you are very bad and i cannot bear it do 
my beloved miss harlowe if you can be better do for my sake be
better and send me word of it let the bearer bring me a line be sure
you send me a line if i lose you my more than sister and lose my
mother i shall distrust my own conduct and will not marry and why
should i creeping cringing in courtship o my dear these men are a
vile race of reptiles in our day and mere bears in their own see in
lovelace all that is desirable in figure in birth and in fortune but
in his heart a devil see in hickman indeed my dear i cannot tell
what any body can see in hickman to be always preaching in his favour 
and is it to be expected that i who could hardly bear control from a
mother should take it from a husband from one too who has neither
more wit nor more understanding than myself yet he to be my
instructor so he will i suppose but more by the insolence of his will
than by the merit of his counsel it is in vain to think of it i
cannot be a wife to any man breathing whom i at present know this i the
rather mention now because on my mother's danger i know you will be
for pressing me the sooner to throw myself into another sort of
protection should i be deprived of her but no more of this subject or
indeed of any other for i am obliged to attend my mamma who cannot bear
me out of her sight 


 


wednesday aug 30 

my mother heaven be praised has had a fine night and is much better 
her fever has yielded to medicine and now i can write once more with
freedom and ease to you in hopes that you also are better if this be
granted to my prayers i shall again be happy i writhe with still the
more alacrity as i have an opportunity given me to touch upon a subject
in which you are nearly concerned 

you must know then my dear that your cousin morden has been here with
me he told me of an interview he had on monday at lord m s with
lovelace and asked me abundance of questions about you and about that
villanous man 

i could have raised a fine flame between them if i would but observing
that he is a man of very lively passions and believing you would be
miserable if any thing should happen to him from a quarrel with a man who
is known to have so many advantages at his sword i made not the worst of
the subjects we talked of but as i could not tell untruths in his
favour you must think i said enough to make him curse the wretch 

i don't find well as they all used to respect colonel morden that he
has influence enough upon them to bring them to any terms of
reconciliation 

what can they mean by it but your brother is come home it seems so 
the honour of the house the reputation of the family is all the cry 

the colonel is exceedingly out of humour with them all yet has he not
hitherto it seems seen your brutal brother i told him how ill you
were and communicated to him some of the contents of your letter he
admired you cursed lovelace and raved against all your family he
declared that they were all unworthy of you 

at his earnest request i permitted him to take some brief notes of such
of the contents of your letter to me as i thought i could read to him 
and particularly of your melancholy conclusion 


 see letter xxxii of this volume 


he says that none of your friends think you are so ill as you are nor
will believe it he is sure they all love you and that dearly too 

if they do their present hardness of heart will be the subject of
everlasting remorse to them should you be taken from us but now it seems
 barbarous wretches   you are to suffer within an inch of your life 

he asked me questions about mr belford and when he had heard what i
had to say of that gentleman and his disinterested services to you he
raved at some villanous surmises thrown out against you by that officious
pedant brand who but for his gown i find would come off poorly enough
between your cousin and lovelace 

he was so uneasy about you himself that on thursday the 24th he sent
up an honest serious man one alston a gentleman farmer to inquire of
your condition your visiters and the like who brought him word that
you was very ill and was put to great straits to support yourself but
as this was told him by the gentlewoman of the house where you lodge 
who it seems mingled it with some tart though deserved reflections
upon your relations' cruelty it was not credited by them and i myself
hope it cannot be true for surely you could not be so unjust i will
say to my friendship as to suffer any inconveniencies for want of
money i think i could not forgive you if it were so 


 see letter xxiii ibid 


the colonel as one of your trustees is resolved to see you put into
possession of your estate and in the mean time he has actually engaged
them to remit to him for you the produce of it accrued since your
grandfather's death a very considerable sum and proposes himself to
attend you with it but by a hint he dropt i find you had disappointed
some people's littleness by not writing to them for money and supplies 
since they were determined to distress you and to put you at defiance 

like all the rest i hope i may say that without offence 

your cousin imagines that before a reconciliation takes place they will
insist that you make such a will as to that estate as they shall
approve of but he declares that he will not go out of england till he
has seen justice done you by every body and that you shall not be
imposed on either by friend or foe 

by relation or foe should he not have said for a friend will not
impose upon a friend 

so my dear you are to buy your peace if some people are to have their
wills 

your cousin  not i my dear though it was always my opinion   says that
the whole family is too rich to be either humble considerate or
contented and as for himself he has an ample fortune he says and
thinks of leaving it wholly to you 


 see vol i letter x 


had this villain lovelace consulted his worldly interest only what a
fortune would he have had in you even although your marrying him had
deprived you of a paternal share 

i am obliged to leave off here but having a good deal still more to
write and my mother better i will pursue the subject in another letter 
although i send both together i need not say how much i am and will
ever be 

your affectionate etc 
anna howe 



letter liii

miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
thursday august 31 


the colonel thought fit once in praise of lovelace's generosity to say 
that as a man of honour ought he took to himself all the blame and
acquitted you of the consequences of the precipitate step you had taken 
since he said as you loved him and was in his power he must have had
advantages which he would not have had if you had continued at your
father's or at any friend's 

mighty generous i said were it as he supposed in such insolent
reflectors the best of them who pretend to clear reputations which
never had been sullied but by falling into their dirty acquaintance but
in this case i averred that there was no need of any thing but the
strictest truth to demonstrate lovelace to be the blackest of villains 
you the brightest of innocents 

this he catched at and swore that if any thing uncommon or barbarous in
the seduction were to come out as indeed one of the letters you had
written to your friends and which had been shown him very strongly
implied that is to say my dear if any thing worse than perjury breach
of faith and abuse of a generous confidence were to appear  sorry
fellows   he would avenge his cousin to the utmost 

i urged your apprehensions on this head from your last letter to me but
he seemed capable of taking what i know to be real greatness of soul in
an unworthy sense for he mentioned directly upon it the expectations
your friends had that you should previous to any reconciliation with
them appear in a court of justice against the villain if you could do
it with the advantage to yourself that i hinted might be done 

and truly if i would have heard him he had indelicacy enough to have
gone into the nature of the proof of the crime upon which they wanted to
have lovelace arraigned yet this is a man improved by travel and
learning upon my word my dear i who have been accustomed to the most
delicate conversation ever since i had the honour to know you despise
this sex from the gentleman down to the peasant 

upon the whole i find that mr morden has a very slender notion of
women's virtue in particular cases for which reason i put him down 
though your favourite as one who is not entitled to cast the first
stone 

i never knew a man who deserved to be well thought of himself for his
morals who had a slight opinion of the virtue of our sex in general 
for if from the difference of temperament and education modesty 
chastity and piety too are not to be found in our sex preferably to
the other i should think it a sign of much worse nature in ours 

he even hinted as from your relations indeed that it is impossible
but there most be some will where there is much love 

these sort of reflections are enough to make a woman who has at heart
her own honour and the honour of her sex to look about her and consider
what she is doing when she enters into an intimacy with these wretches 
since it is plain that whenever she throws herself into the power of a
man and leaves for him her parents or guardians every body will believe
it to be owing more to her good luck than to her discretion if there be
not an end of her virtue and let the man be ever such a villain to her 
she must take into her own bosom a share of his guilty baseness 

i am writing to general cases you my dear are out of the question 
your story as i have heretofore said will afford a warning as well as
an example for who is it that will not infer that if a person of your
fortune character and merit could not escape ruin after she had put
herself into the power of her hyaena what can a thoughtless fond giddy
creature expect 


 see vol iv letter xxiii 


every man they will say is not a lovelace true but then neither is
every woman a clarissa and allow for the one and for the other the
example must be of general use 

i prepared mr morden to expect your appointment of mr belford for an
office that we both hope he will have no occasion to act in nor any body
else for many very many years to come he was at first startled at it 
but upon hearing such of your reasons as had satisfied me he only said
that such an appointment were it to take place would exceedingly affect
his other cousins 

he told me he had a copy of lovelace's letter to you imploring your
pardon and offering to undergo any penance to procure it and also of
your answer to it 


 see vol vii letter lxxix 
 ibid letter lxxxiii 


i find he is willing to hope that a marriage between you may still take
place which he says will heal up all breaches 

i would have written much more on the following particulars especially 
to wit of the wretched man's hunting you out of your lodgings of your
relations' strange implacableness  i am in haste and cannot think of a
word you would like better just now   of your last letter to lovelace to
divert him from pursuing you of your aunt hervey's penitential
conversation with mrs norton of mr wyerley's renewed address of your
lessons to me in hickman's behalf so approvable were the man more so
than he is but indeed i am offended with him at this instant and have
been for these two days of your sister's transportation-project and of
twenty and twenty other things but am obliged to leave off to attend my
two cousins spilsworth and my cousin herbert who are come to visit us
on account of my mother's illness i will therefore dispatch these by
rogers and if my mother gets well soon as i hope she will i am
resolved to see you in town and tell you every thing that now is upon my
mind and particularly mingling my soul with your's how much i am and
will ever be my dearest dear friend 

your affectionate
anna howe 

let rogers bring one line i pray you i thought to have sent him this
 afternoon but he cannot set out till to-morrow morning early 

i cannot express how much your staggering lines and your conclusion
 affect me 



letter liv

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
sunday evening sept 3 


i wonder not at the impatience your servant tells me you express to hear
from me i was designing to write you a long letter and was just
returned from smith's for that purpose but since you are urgent you
must be contented with a short one 

i attended the lady this morning just before i set out for edgware she
was so ill over-night that she was obliged to leave unfinished her
letter to miss howe but early this morning she made an end of it and
just sealed it up as i came she was so fatigued with writing that she
told me she would lie down after i was gone and endeavour to recruit her
spirits 

they had sent for mr goddard when she was so ill last night and not
being able to see him out of her own chamber he for the first time saw
her house as she calls it he was extremely shocked and concerned at
it and chid mrs smith and mrs lovick for not persuading her to have
such an object removed form her bed-chamber and when they excused
themselves on the little authority it was reasonable to suppose they must
have with a lady so much their superior he reflected warmly on those who
had more authority and who left her to proceed with such a shocking and
solemn whimsy as he called it 

it is placed near the window like a harpsichord though covered over to
the ground and when she is so ill that she cannot well go to her closet 
she writes and reads upon it as others would upon a desk or table but
 only as she was so ill last night she chooses not to see any body in
that apartment 

i went to edgware and returning in the evening attended her again 
she had a letter brought her from mrs norton a long one as it seems by
its bulk just before i came but she had not opened it and said that
as she was pretty calm and composed she was afraid to look into the
contents lest she should be ruffled expecting now to hear of nothing
that could do her good or give her pleasure from that good woman's dear
hard-hearted neighbours as she called her own relations 

seeing her so weak and ill i withdrew nor did she desire me to tarry 
as sometimes she does when i make a motion to depart 

i had some hints as i went away from mrs smith that she had
appropriated that evening to some offices that were to save trouble as
she called it after her departure and had been giving orders to her
nurse and to mrs lovick and mrs smith about what she would have done
when she was gone and i believe they were of a very delicate and
affecting nature but mrs smith descended not to particulars 

the doctor had been with her as well as mr goddard and they both
joined with great earnestness to persuade her to have her house removed
out of her sight but she assured them that it gave her pleasure and
spirits and being a necessary preparation she wondered they should be
surprised at it when she had not any of her family about her or any old
acquaintance on whose care and exactness in these punctilios as she
called them she could rely 

the doctor told mrs smith that he believed she would hold out long
enough for any of her friends to have notice of her state and to see
her and hardly longer and since he could not find that she had any
certainty of seeing her cousin morden which made it plain that her
relations continued inflexible he would go home and write a letter to
her father take it as she would 

she had spent great part of the day in intense devotions and to-morrow
morning she is to have with her the same clergyman who has often attended
her from whose hands she will again receive the sacrament 

thou seest lovelace that all is preparing that all will be ready and
i am to attend her to-morrow afternoon to take some instructions from
her in relation to my part in the office to be performed for her and
thus omitting the particulars of a fine conversation between her and
mrs lovick which the latter acquainted me with as well as another
between her and the doctor and apothecary which i had a design this
evening to give you they being of a very affecting nature i have
yielded to your impatience 

 i shall dispatch harry to-morrow morning early with her letter to miss
 howe an offer she took very kindly as she is extremely
 solicitous to lessen that young lady's apprehensions for her on
 not hearing from her by saturday's post and yet if she write
 truth as no doubt but she will how can her apprehensions be
 lessened 



letter lv

miss clarissa harlowe to miss howe
saturday sept 2 


i write my beloved miss howe though very ill still but i could not by
the return of your messenger for i was then unable to hold a pen 

your mother's illness as mentioned in the first part of your letter 
gave me great distress for you till i read farther you bewailed it as
became a daughter so sensible may you be blessed in each other for
many very many years to come i doubt not that even this sudden and
grievous indisposition by the frame it has put you in and the
apprehension it has given you of losing so dear a mother will contribute
to the happiness i wish you for alas my dear we seldom know how to
value the blessings we enjoy till we are in danger of losing them or
have actually lost them and then what would we give to have them
restored to us 

what i wonder has again happened between you and mr hickman although
i know not i dare say it is owing to some petty petulance to some
half-ungenerous advantage taken of his obligingness and assiduity will
you never my dear give the weight you and all our sex ought to give to
the qualities of sobriety and regularity of life and manners in that sex 
must bold creatures and forward spirits for ever and by the best and
wisest of us as well as by the indiscreetest be the most kindly
treated 

my dear friends know not that i have actually suffered within less than
an inch of my life 

poor mr brand he meant well i believe i am afraid all will turn
heavily upon him when he probably imagined that he was taking the best
method to oblige but were he not to have been so light of belief and
so weakly officious and had given a more favourable and it would be
strange if i could not say a juster report things would have been 
nevertheless exactly as they are 

i must lay down my pen i am very ill i believe i shall be better
by-and-by the bad writing would betray me although i had a mind to
keep from you what the event must soon 


 


now i resume my trembling pen excuse the unsteady writing it will
be so 

i have wanted no money so don't be angry about such a trifle as money 
yet i am glad of what you inclined me to hope that my friends will give
up the produce of my grandfather's estate since it has been in their
hands because knowing it to be my right and that they could not want
it i had already disposed of a good part of it and could only hope they
would be willing to give it up at my last request and now how rich
shall i think myself in this my last stage and yet i did not want
before indeed i did not for who that has many superfluities can be
said to want 

do not my dear friend be concerned that i call it my last stage for
what is even the long life which in high health we wish for what but 
as we go along a life of apprehension sometimes for our friends 
oftener for ourselves and at last when arrived at the old age we
covet one heavy loss or deprivation having succeeded another we see
ourselves stript as i may say of every one we loved and find ourselves
exposed as uncompanionable poor creatures to the slights to the
contempts of jostling youth who want to push us off the stage in hopes
to possess what we have and superadded to all our own infirmities
every day increasing of themselves enough to make the life we wished for
the greatest disease of all don't you remember the lines of howard 
which once you read to me in my ivy-bower 


 these are the lines the lady refers to 

 from death we rose to life tis but the same 
 through life to pass again from whence we came 
 with shame we see our passions can prevail 
 where reason certainty and virtue fail 
 honour that empty name can death despise 
 scorn'd love to death as to a refuge flies 
 and sorrow waits for death with longing eyes 
 hope triumphs o'er the thoughts of death and fate
 cheats fools and flatters the unfortunate 
 we fear to lose what a small time must waste 
 till life itself grows the disease at last 
 begging for life we beg for more decay 
 and to be long a dying only pray 


in the disposition of what belongs to me i have endeavoured to do every
thing in the justest and best manner i could think of putting myself in
my relations' places and in the greater points ordering my matters as
if no misunderstanding had happened 

i hope they will not think much of some bequests where wanted and where
due from my gratitude but if they should what is done is done and i
cannot now help it yet i must repeat that i hope i hope i have
pleased every one of them for i would not on any account have it
thought that in my last disposition any thing undaughterly unsisterly 
or unlike a kinswoman should have had place in a mind that is a truly
free as i will presume to say from all resentment that it now
overflows with gratitude and blessings for the good i have received 
although it be not all that my heart wished to receive were it even an
hardship that i was not favoured with more what is it but an hardship
of half a year against the most indulgent goodness of eighteen years and
an half that ever was shown to a daughter 

my cousin you tell me thinks i was off my guard and that i was taken
at some advantage indeed my dear i was not indeed i gave no room
for advantage to be taken of me i hope one day that will be seen if
i have the justice done me which mr belford assures me of 

i should hope that my cousin has not taken the liberties which you by an
observation not in general unjust seem to charge him with for it is
sad to think that the generality of that sex should make so light of
crimes which they justly hold so unpardonable in their own most intimate
relations of our's yet cannot commit them without doing such injuries to
other families as they think themselves obliged to resent unto death 
when offered to their own 

but we women are to often to blame on this head since the most virtuous
among us seldom make virtue the test of their approbation of the other
sex insomuch that a man may glory in his wickedness of this sort without
being rejected on that account even to the faces of women of
unquestionable virtue hence it is that a libertine seldom thinks
himself concerned so much as to save appearances and what is it not that
our sex suffers in their opinion on this very score and what have i 
more than many others to answer for on this account in the world's eye 

may my story be a warning to all how they prefer a libertine to a man of
true honour and how they permit themselves to be misled where they mean
the best by the specious yet foolish hope of subduing riveted habits 
and as i may say of altering natures the more foolish as constant
experience might convince us that there is hardly one in ten of even
tolerably happy marriages in which the wife keeps the hold in the
husband's affections which she had in the lover's what influence then
can she hope to have over the morals of an avowed libertine who marries
perhaps for conveniency who despises the tie and whom it is too
probable nothing but old age or sickness or disease the consequence
of ruinous riot can reclaim 

i am very glad you gave my cous 


sunday morning sept 3 six o'clock 

hither i had written and was forced to quit my pen and so much weaker
and worse i grew that had i resumed it to have closed here it must
have been with such trembling unsteadiness that it would have given you
more concern for me than the delay of sending it away by last night's
post can do i deferred it therefore to see how it would please god to
deal with me and i find myself after a better night than i expected 
lively and clear and hope to give a proof that i do in the continuation
of my letter which i will pursue as currently as if i had not left off 

i am glad that you so considerately gave my cousin morden favourable
impressions of mr belford since otherwise some misunderstanding might
have happened between them for although i hope this mr belford is an
altered man and in time will be a reformed one yet is he one of those
high spirits that has been accustomed to resent imaginary indignities to
himself when i believe he has not been studious to avoid giving real
offences to others men of this cast acting as if they thought all the
world was made to bar with them and they with nobody in it 

mr lovelace you tell me thought fit to intrust my cousin with the copy
of his letter of penitence to me and with my answer to it rejecting him
and his suit and mr belford moreover acquaints me how much concerned
mr lovelace is for his baseness and how freely he accused himself to my
cousin this shows that the true bravery of spirit is to be above doing
a vile action and that nothing subjects the human mind to so much
meanness as the consciousness of having done wilful wrong to our fellow
creatures how low how sordid are the submissions which elaborate
baseness compels that that wretch could treat me as he did and then
could so poorly creep to me for forgiveness of crimes so wilful so
black and so premeditated how my soul despised him for his meanness on
a certain occasion of which you will one day be informed and him whose
actions one's heart despises it is far from being difficult to reject 
had one ever so partially favoured him once 


 meaning his meditated second violence see vol vi letter xxxvi and
his succeeding letters to her supplicating for her pardon 


yet am i glad this violent spirit can thus creep that like a poisonous
serpent he can thus coil himself and hide his head in his own narrow
circlets because this stooping this abasement gives me hope that no
farther mischief will ensue 

all my apprehension is what may happen when i am gone lest then my
cousin or any other of my family should endeavour to avenge me and
risk their own more precious lives on that account 

if that part of cain's curse were mr lovelace's to be a fugitive and
vagabond in the earth that is to say if it meant no more harm to him
than that he should be obliged to travel as it seems he intends though
i wish him no ill in his travels and i could know it then should i be
easy in the hoped-for safety of my friends from his skilful violence oh 
that i could hear he was a thousand miles off 

when i began this letter i did not think i could have run to such a
length but tis to you my dearest friend and you have a title to the
spirits you raise and support for they are no longer mine and will
subside the moment i cease writing to you 

but what do you bid me hope for when you tell me that if your mother's
health will permit you will see me in town i hope your mother's health
will be perfected as you wish but i dare not promise myself so great a
favour so great a blessing i will call it and indeed i know not if i
should be able to bear it now 

yet one comfort it is in your power to give me and that is let me know 
and very speedily it must be if you wish to oblige me that all matters
are made up between you and mr hickman to whom i see you are
resolved with all your bravery of spirit to owe a multitude of
obligations for his patience with your flightiness think of this my
dear proud friend and think likewise of what i have often told you 
that pride in man or woman is an extreme that hardly ever fails sooner
or later to bring forth its mortifying contrary 

may you my dear miss howe have no discomforts but what you make to
yourself as it will be in your own power to lessen such as these they
ought to be your punishment if you do not there is no such thing as
perfect happiness here since the busy mind will make to itself evils 
were it to find none you will therefore pardon this limited wish 
strange as it may appear till you consider it for to wish you no
infelicity either within or without you were to wish you what can never
happen in this world and what perhaps ought not to be wished for if by
a wish one could give one's friend such an exemption since we are not to
live here always 

we must not in short expect that our roses will grow without thorns 
but then they are useful and instructive thorns which by pricking the
fingers of the too-hasty plucker teach future caution and who knows
not that difficulty gives poignancy to our enjoyments which are apt to
lose their relish with us when they are over easily obtained 

i must conclude 

god for ever bless you and all you love and honour and reward you here
and hereafter for your kindness to

your ever obliged and affectionate
clarissa harlowe 



letter lvi

mrs norton to miss clarissa harlowe
 in answer to her's of thursday august 24 see letter xxx of this
volume  
thursday aug 31 


i had written sooner my dearest young lady but that i have been
endeavouring ever since the receipt of your last letter to obtain a
private audience of your mother in hopes of leave to communicate it to
her but last night i was surprised by an invitation to breakfast at
harlowe-place this morning and the chariot came early to fetch me an
honour i did not expect 

when i came i found there was to be a meeting of all your family with
col morden at harlowe-place and it was proposed by your mother and
consented to that i should be present your cousin i understand had
with difficulty brought this meeting to bear for your brother had before
industriously avoided all conversation with him on the affecting subject 
urging that it was not necessary to talk to mr morden upon it who 
being a remoter relation than themselves had no business to make himself
a judge of their conduct to their daughter their niece and their
sister especially as he had declared himself in her favour adding that
he should hardly have patience to be questioned by mr morden on that
head 

i was in hopes that your mother would have given me an opportunity of
talking with her alone before the company met but she seemed studiously
to avoid it i dare say however not with her inclination 

i was ordered in just before mr morden came and was bid to sit down 
which i did in the window 

the colonel when he came began the discourse by renewing as he called
it his solicitations in your favour he set before them your penitence 
your ill health your virtue though once betrayed and basely used he
then read to them mr lovelace's letter a most contrite one indeed and
your high-souled answer for that was what he justly called it and he
treated as it deserved mr brand's officious information of which i had
before heard he had made them ashamed by representations founded upon
inquiries made by mr alston whom he had procured to go up on purpose
to acquaint himself with your manner of life and what was meant by the
visits of that mr belford 


 see vol vii lxxix 
 ibid letter lxxxiii 
 see vol viii letter xxiii 


he then told them that he had the day before waited upon miss howe and
had been shown a letter from you to her and permitted to take some
memorandums from it in which you appeared both by handwriting and the
contents to be so very ill that it seemed doubtful to him if it were
possible for you to get over it and when he read to them that passage 
where you ask miss howe what can be done for you now were your friends
to be ever so favourable and wish for their sakes more than for your
own that they would still relent  and then say you are very ill you
must drop your pen and ask excuse for your crooked writing and take as
it were a last farewell of miss howe adieu my dear adieu  are your
words 


 ibid letter xxxiii 


o my child my child said you mamma weeping and clasping her hands 

dear madam said your brother be so good as to think you have more
children than this ungrateful one 

yet your sister seemed affected 

your uncle harlowe wiping his eyes o cousin said he if one thought
the poor girl was really so ill 

she must said your uncle antony this is written to her private friend 
god forbid she should be quite lost 

your uncle harlowe wished they did not carry their resentments too far 

i begged for god's sake wringing my hands and with a bended knee that
they would permit me to go up to you engaging to give them a faithful
account of the way you were in but i was chidden by your brother and
this occasioned some angry words between him and mr morden 

i believe sir i believe madam said your sister to her father and
mother we need not trouble my cousin to read any more it does but
grieve and disturb you my sister clary seems to be ill i think if
mrs norton were permitted to go up to her it would be right wickedly
as she has acted if she be truly penitent 

here she stopt and every one being silent i stood up once more and
besought them to let me go and then i offered to read a passage or two
in your letter to me of the 24th but i was taken up again by your
brother and this occasioned still higher words between the colonel and
him 

your mother hoping to gain upon your inflexible brother and to divert
the anger of the two gentlemen from each other proposed that the colonel
should proceed in reading the minutes he had taken from your letter 

he accordingly read of your resuming your pen that you thought you had
taken your last farewell and the rest of that very affecting passage in
which you are obliged to break off more than once and afterwards to take
an airing in a chair  your brother and sister were affected at this 
and he had recourse to his snuff-box and where you comfort miss howe 
and say you shall be happy  it is more said he than she will let any
body else be 

your sister called you sweet soul but with a low voice then grew
hard-hearted again set said  sic  nobody could help being affected by
your pathetic grief but that it was your talent 

the colonel then went on to the good effect your airing had upon you to
your good wishes to miss howe and mr hickman and to your concluding
sentence that when the happy life you wished to her comes to be wound
up she may be as calm and as easy at quitting it as you hope in god you
shall be your mother could not stand this but retired to a corner of
the room and sobbed and wept your father for a few minutes could not
speak though he seemed inclined to say something 

your uncles were also both affected but your brother went round to each 
and again reminded your mother that she had other children what was
there he said in what was read but the result of the talent you had of
moving the passions and he blamed them for choosing to hear read what
they knew their abused indulgence could not be a proof against 

this set mr morden up again fie upon you cousin harlowe said he i
see plainly to whom it is owing that all relationship and ties of blood 
with regard to this sweet sufferer are laid aside such rigours as
these make it difficult for a sliding virtue ever to recover itself 

your brother pretended the honour of the family and declared that no
child ought to be forgiven who abandoned the most indulgent of parents
against warning against the light of knowledge as you had done 

but sir and ladies said i rising from the seat in the window and
humbly turning round to each if i may be permitted to speak my dear
miss asks only for a blessing she does not beg to be received to
favour she is very ill and asks only for a last blessing 

come come good norton  i need not tell you who said this   you are
up again with your lamentables a good woman as you are to forgive
so readily a crime that has been as disgraceful to your part in her
education as to her family is a weakness that would induce one to
suspect your virtue if you were to be encountered by a temptation
properly adapted 

by some such charitable logic said mr morden as this is my cousin
arabella captivated i doubt not if virtue you mr james harlowe 
are the most virtuous young man in the world 

i knew how it would be replied your brother in a passion if i met mr 
morden upon this business i would have declined it but you sir to
his father would not permit me to do so 

but sir turning to the colonel in no other presence 

then cousin james interrupted the other gentleman that which is your
protection it seems is mine i am not used to bear defiances thus 
you are my cousin sir and the son and nephew of persons as dear as near
to me there he paused 

are we said your father to be made still more unhappy among ourselves 
when the villain lives that ought to be the object of every one's
resentment who has either a value for the family or for this ungrateful
girl 

that's the man said your cousin whom last monday as you know i went
purposely to make the object of mine but what could i say when i found
him so willing to repair his crime and i give it as my opinion and
have written accordingly to my poor cousin that it is best for all round
that his offer should be accepted and let me tell you 

tell me nothing said your father quite enraged or that very vile
fellow i have a rivetted hatred to him i would rather see the rebel
die an hundred deaths were it possible than that she should give such a
villain as him a relation to my family 

well but there is no room to think said you mother that she will give
us such a relation my dear the poor girl will lessen i fear the
number of our relations not increase it if she be so ill as we are told
she is let us send mrs norton up to her that's the least we can do 
let us take her however out of the hands of that belford 

both your uncles supported this motion the latter part of it especially 

your brother observed in his ill-natured way what a fine piece of
consistency it was in you to refuse the vile injurer and the amends he
offered yet to throw yourself upon the protection of his fast friend 

miss harlowe was apprehensive she said that you would leave all you
could leave to that pert creature miss howe  so she called her   if you
should die 

o do not do not suppose that my bella said your poor mother i cannot
think of parting with my clary with all her faults she is my child her
reasons for her conduct are not heard it would break my heart to lose
her i think my dear to your father none so fit as i to go up if you
will give me leave and mrs norton shall accompany me 

this was a sweet motion and your father paused upon it mr morden
offered his service to escort her your uncles seemed to approve of it 
but your brother dashed all i hope sir said he to his father i
hope madam to his mother that you will not endeavour to recover a
faulty daughter by losing an unculpable son i do declare that if ever
my sister clary darkens these doors again i never will i will set out 
madam the same hour you go to london on such an errand to edinburgh 
and there i will reside and try to forget that i have relations in
england so near and so dear as you are now all to me 

good god said the colonel what a declaration is this and suppose 
sir and suppose madam  turning to your father and mother   this should
be the case whether it is better think you that you should lose for
ever such a daughter as my cousin clary or that your son should go to
edinburgh and reside there upon an estate which will be the better for
his residence upon it 

your brother's passionate behaviour hereupon is hardly to be described 
he resented it as promising an alienation of the affection of the family
to him and to such an height were resentments carried every one siding
with him that the colonel with hands and eyes lifted up cried out 
what hearts of flint am i related to o cousin harlowe to your father 
are you resolved to have but one daughter are you madam to be taught 
by a son who has no bowels to forget you are a mother 

the colonel turned from them to draw out his handkerchief and could not
for a minute speak the eyes of every one but the hard-hearted brother 
caught tears from his 

but then turning to them with the more indignation as it seemed as he
had been obliged to show a humanity which however no brave heart
should be ashamed of i leave ye all said he fit company for one
another i will never open my lips to any of you more upon this subject 
i will instantly make my will and in me shall the dear creature have the
father uncle brother she has lost i will prevail upon her to take
the tour of france and italy with me nor shall she return till ye know
the value of such a daughter 

and saying this he hurried out of the room went into the court-yard 
and ordered his horse 

mr antony harlowe went to him there just as he was mounting and said
he hoped he should find him cooler in the evening for he till then 
had lodged at his house and that then they would converse calmly and
every one mean time would weigh all matters well but the angry
gentleman said cousin harlowe i shall endeavour to discharge the
obligations i owe to your civility since i have been in england but i
have been so treated by that hot-headed young man who as far as i
know has done more to ruin his sister than lovelace himself and this
with the approbation of you all that i will not again enter into your
doors or theirs my servants shall have orders whither to bring what
belongs to me from your house i will see my dear cousin clary as soon
as i can and so god bless you altogether only this one word to your
nephew if you please that he wants to be taught the difference between
courage and bluster and it is happy for him perhaps that i am his
kinsman though i am sorry he is mine 

i wondered to hear your uncle on his return to them all repeat this 
because of the consequences it may be attended with though i hope it
will not have bad ones yet it was considered as a sort of challenge and
so it confirmed every body in your brother's favour and miss harlowe
forgot not to inveigh against that error which had brought on all these
evils 

i took the liberty again but with fear and trembling to desire leave to
attend you 

before any other person could answer your brother said i suppose you
look upon yourself mrs norton to be your own mistress pray do you
want our consents and courtship to go up if i may speak my mind you
and my sister clary are the fittest to be together yet i wish you would
not trouble your head about our family matters till you are desired to
do so 

but don't you know brother said miss harlowe that the error of any
branch of a family splits that family into two parties and makes not
only every common friend and acquaintance but even servants judges over
both this is one of the blessed effects of my sister clary's fault 

there never was a creature so criminal said your father looking with
displeasure at me who had not some weak heads to pity and side with her 

i wept your mother was so good as to take me by the hand come good
woman said she come along with me you have too much reason to be
afflicted with what afflicts us to want additions to your grief 

but my dearest young lady i was more touched for your sake than for my
own for i have been low in the world for a great number of years and 
of consequence have been accustomed to snubs and rebuffs from the
affluent but i hope that patience is written as legibly on my forehead 
as haughtiness on that of any of my obligers 

your mother led me to her chamber and there we sat and wept together for
several minutes without being able to speak either of us one word to the
other at last she broke silence asking me if you were really and
indeed so ill as it was said you were 

i answered in the affirmative and would have shown her your last letter 
but she declined seeing it 

i would fain have procured from her the favour of a line to you with her
blessing i asked what was intended by your brother and sister would
nothing satisfy them but your final reprobation i insinuated how easy
it would be did not your duty and humility govern you to make yourself
independent as to circumstances but that nothing but a blessing a last
blessing was requested by you and many other thins i urged in your
behalf the following brief repetition of what she was pleased to say in
answer to my pleas will give you a notion of it all and of the present
situation of things 

she said she was very unhappy she had lost the little authority she
once had over her other children through one child's failing and all
influence over mr harlowe and his brothers your father she said had
besought her to leave it to him to take his own methods with you and 
 as she valued him to take no step in your favour unknown to him and
your uncles yet she owned that they were too much governed by your
brother they would however give way in time she knew to a
reconciliation they designed no other for they all still loved you 

your brother and sister she owned were very jealous of your coming
into favour again yet could but mr morden have kept his temper and
stood her son's first sallies who having always had the family grandeur
in view had carried his resentment so high that he knew not how to
descend the conferences so abruptly broken off just now would have
ended more happily for that she had reason to think that a few
concessions on your part with regard to your grandfather's estate and
your cousin's engaging for your submission as from proper motives would
have softened them all 

mr brand's account of your intimacy with the friend of the obnoxious
man she said had for the time very unhappy effects for before that
she had gained some ground but afterwards dared not nor indeed had
inclination to open her lips in your behalf your continued intimacy
with that mr belford was wholly unaccountable and as wholly
inexcusable 

what made the wished-for reconciliation she said more difficult was 
first that you yourself acknowledged yourself dishonoured and it was
too well known that it was your own fault that you ever were in the
power of so great a profligate of consequence that their and your
disgrace could not be greater than it was yet that you refuse to
prosecute the wretch next that the pardon and blessing hoped for must
probably be attended with your marriage to the man they hate and who
hates them as much very disagreeable circumstances she said i must
allow to found a reconciliation upon 

as to her own part she must needs say that if there were any hope that
mr lovelace would become a reformed man the letter her cousin morden
had read to them from him to you and the justice as she hoped it was 
he did your character though to his own condemnation his family and
fortunes being unexceptionable and all his relations earnest to be
related to you were arguments that would weigh with her could they have
any with your father and uncles 

to my plea of your illness she could not but flatter herself she
answered that it was from lowness of spirits and temporary dejection 
a young creature she said so very considerate as you naturally were 
and fallen so low must have enough of that should they lose you which
god forbid the scene would then indeed be sadly changed for then those
who now most resented would be most grieved all your fine qualities
would rise to their remembrance and your unhappy error would be quite
forgotten 

she wished you would put yourself into your cousin's protection
entirely and have nothing to more to say to mr belford 

and i would recommend it to your most serious consideration my dear miss
clary whether now as your cousin who is your trustee for your
grandfather's estate is come you should not give over all thoughts of
mr lovelace's intimate friend for your executor more especially as
that gentleman's interfering in the concerns of your family should the
sad event take place which my heart aches but to think of might be
attended with those consequences which you are so desirous in other
cases to obviate and prevent and suppose my dear young lady you were
to write one letter more to each of your uncles to let them know how ill
you are and to ask their advice and offer to be governed by it in
relation to the disposition of your estate and effects methinks i wish
you would 

i find they will send you up a large part of what has been received from
that estate since it was your's together with your current cash which
you left behind you and this by your cousin morden for fear you should
have contracted debts which may make you uneasy 

they seem to expect that you will wish to live at your grandfather's
house in a private manner if your cousin prevail not upon you to go
abroad for a year or two 


friday morning 

betty was with me just now she tells me that your cousin morden is so
much displeased with them all that he has refused to lodge any more at
your uncle antony's and has even taken up with inconvenient lodgings 
till he is provided with others to his mind this very much concerns
them and they repent their violent treatment of him and the more as he
is resolved he says to make you his sole executrix and heir to all his
fortune 

what noble fortunes still my dearest young lady await you i am
thoroughly convinced if it please god to preserve your life and your
health that every body will soon be reconciled to you and that you will
see many happy days 

your mother wished me not to attend you as yet because she hopes that i
may give myself that pleasure soon with every body's good liking and
even at their desire your cousin morden's reconciliation with them 
which they are very desirous of i am ready to hope will include theirs
with you 

but if that should happen which i so much dread and i not with you i
should never forgive myself let me therefore my dearest young lady 
desire you to command my attendance if you find any danger and if you
wish me peace of mind and no consideration shall withhold me 

i hear that miss howe has obtained leave from her mother to see you and
intends next week to go to town for that purpose and as it is believed 
to buy clothes for her approaching nuptials 

mr hickman's mother-in-law is lately dead her jointure of 600  a-year
is fallen to him and she has moreover as an acknowledgement of his
good behaviour to her left him all she was worth which was very
considerable a few legacies excepted to her own relations 

these good men are uniformly good indeed could not else be good and
never fare the worse for being so all the world agrees he will make
that fine young lady an excellent husband and i am sorry they are not as
much agreed in her making him an excellent wife but i hope a woman of
her principles would not encourage his address if whether she at
present love him or not she thought she could not love him or if she
preferred any other man to him 

mr pocock undertakes to deliver this but fears it will be saturday
night first if not sunday morning 

may the almighty protect and bless you i long to see you my dearest
young lady i long to see you and to fold you once more to my fond
heart i dare to say happy days are coming be but cheerful give way
to hope 

whether for this world or the other you must be happy wish to live 
however were it only because you are so well fitted in mind to make
every one happy who has the honour to know you what signifies this
transitory eclipse you are as near perfection by all i have heard 
as any creature in this world can be for here is your glory you are
brightened and purified as i may say by your sufferings how i long to
hear your whole sad yet instructive story from your own lips 

for miss howe's sake who in her new engagements will so much want you 
for your cousin morden's sake for your mother's sake if i must go on
farther in your family and yet i can say for all their sakes and for
my sake my dearest miss clary let your resumed and accustomed
magnanimity bear you up you have many things to do which i know not the
person who will do if you leave us 

join your prayers then to mine that god will spare you to a world that
wants you and your example and although your days may seem to have been
numbered who knows but that with the good king hezekiah you may have
them prolonged which god grant if it be his blessed will to the
prayers of

your
judith norton



letter lvii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
monday sept 4 


the lady would not read the letter she had from mrs norton till she had
received the communion for fear it should contain any thing that might
disturb that happy calm which she had been endeavouring to obtain for
it and when that solemn office was over she was so composed she said 
that she thought she could receive any news however affecting with
tranquillity 

nevertheless in reading it she was forced to leave off several times
through weakness and a dimness in her sight of which she complained if
i may say complained for so easy and soft were her complaints that they
could hardly be called such 

she was very much affected at divers parts of this letter she wept
several times and sighed often mrs lovick told me that these were
the gentle exclamations she broke out into as she read her unkind her
cruel brother how unsisterly poor dear woman seeming to speak of
mrs norton her kind cousin o these flaming spirits and then
reflecting upon herself more than once what a deep error is mine what
evils have i been the occasion of 

when i was admitted to her presence i have received said she a long
and not very pleasing letter from my dear mrs norton it will soon be
in your hands i am advised against appointing you to the office you
have so kindly accepted of but you must resent nothing of these things 
my choice will have an odd appearance to them but it is now too late to
alter it if i would 

i would fain write an answer to it continued she but i have no distinct
sight mr belford no steadiness of fingers this mistiness however 
will perhaps be gone by-and-by then turning to mrs lovick i don't
think i am dying yet not actually dying mrs lovick for i have no
bodily pain no numbnesses no signs of immediate death i think and my
breath which used of late to be so short is now tolerable my head
clear my intellects free i think i cannot be dying yet i shall have
agonies i doubt life will not give up so blessedly easy i fear yet
how merciful is the almighty to give his poor creature such a sweet
serenity tis what i have prayed for what encouragement mrs lovick 
so near one's dissolution to have it to hope that one's prayers are
answered 

mrs smith as well as mrs lovick was with her they were both in
tears nor had i any more than they power to say a word in answer yet
she spoke all this as well as what follows with a surprising composure
of mind and countenance 

but mr belford said she assuming a still sprightlier air and accent 
let me talk a little to you while i am thus able to say what i have to
say 

mrs lovick don't leave us  for the women were rising to go   pray sit
down and do you mrs smith sit down too dame shelbourne take this
key and open the upper drawer i will move to it 

she did with trembling knees here mr belford is my will it is
witnessed by three persons of mr smith's acquaintance 

i dare to hope that my cousin morden will give you assistance if you
request it of him my cousin morden continued his affection for me but
as i have not seen him i leave all the trouble upon you mr belford 
this deed may want forms and it does no doubt but the less as i have
my grandfather's will almost by heart and have often enough heard that
canvassed i will lay it by itself in this corner putting it at the
further end of the drawer 

she then took up a parcel of letters enclosed in one cover sealed with
three seals of black wax this said she i sealed up last night the
cover sir will let you know what is to be done with what it encloses 
this is the superscription  holding it close to her eyes and rubbing
them  as soon as i am certainly dead this to be broke open by mr 
belford here sir i put it  placing it by the will  these folded
papers are letters and copies of letters disposed according to their
dates miss howe will do with those as you and she shall think fit 
if i receive any more or more come when i cannot receive them they may
be put into this drawer  pulling out and pushing in the looking-glass
drawer   to be given to mr belford be they from whom they will you'll
be so kind as to observe that mrs lovick and dame shelbourne 

here sir proceeded she i put the keys of my apparel  putting them into
the drawer with her papers  all is in order and the inventory upon
them and an account of what i have disposed of so that nobody need to
ask mrs smith any questions 

there will be no immediate need to open or inspect the trunks which
contain my wearing apparel mrs norton will open them or order
somebody to do it for her in your presence mrs lovick for so i have
directed in my will they may be sealed up now i shall never more have
occasion to open them 

she then though i expostulated with her to the contrary caused me to
seal them up with my seal 

after this she locked up the drawer where were her papers first taking
out her book of meditations as she called it saying she should 
perhaps have use for that and then desired me to take the key of that
drawer for she should have no further occasion for that neither 

all this in so composed and cheerful a manner that we were equally
surprised and affected with it 

you can witness for me mrs smith and so can you mrs lovick 
proceeded she if any one ask after my life and conversation since you
have known me that i have been very orderly have kept good hours and
never have lain out of your house but when i was in prison and then you
know i could not help it 

o lovelace that thou hadst heard her or seen her unknown to herself 
on this occasion not one of us could speak a word 

i shall leave the world in perfect charity proceeded she and turning
towards the women don't be so much concerned for me my good friends 
this is all but needful preparation and i shall be very happy 

then again rubbing her eyes which she said were misty and looked more
intently round upon each particularly on me god bless you all said
she how kindly are you concerned for me who says i am friendless who
says i am abandoned and among strangers good mr belford don't be so
generously humane indeed  putting her handkerchief to her charming
eyes   you will make me less happy than i am sure you wish me to be 

while we were thus solemnly engaged a servant came with a letter from
her cousin morden then said she he is not come himself 

she broke it open but every line she said appeared two to her so
that being unable to read it herself she desired i would read it to
her i did so and wished it were more consolatory to her but she was
all patient attention tears however often trickling down her cheeks 
by the date it was written yesterday and this is the substance of it 

he tells her that the thursday before he had procured a general meeting
of her principal relations at her father's though not without
difficulty her haughty brother opposing it and when met rendering all
his endeavours to reconcile them to her ineffectual he censures him as
the most ungovernable young man he ever knew some great sickness he
says some heavy misfortune is wanted to bring him to a knowledge of
himself and of what is due from him to others and he wishes that he
were not her brother and his cousin nor doe he spare her father and
uncles for being so implicitly led by him 

he tells her that he parted with them all in high displeasure and
thought never more to darken any of their doors that he declared as much
to her two uncles who came to him on saturday to try to accommodate
with him and who found him preparing to go to london to attend her and
that notwithstanding their pressing entreaties he determined so to do 
and not to go with them to harlowe-place or to either of their own
houses and accordingly dismissed them with such an answer 

but that her noble letter  as he calls it of aug 31 being brought
him about an hour after their departure he thought it might affect them
as much as it did him and give them the exalted opinion of her virtue
which was so well deserved he therefore turned his horse's head back
to her uncle antony's instead of forwards toward london 


 see letter xlv of this volume 


that accordingly arriving there and finding her two uncles together he
read to them the affecting letter which left none of the three a dry
eye that the absent as is usual in such cases bearing all the load 
they accused her brother and sister and besought him to put off his
journey to town till he could carry with him the blessings which she had
formerly in vain solicited for and as they hoped the happy tidings of
a general reconciliation 

that not doubting but his visit would be the more welcome to her if
these good ends could be obtained he the more readily complied with
their desires but not being willing to subject himself to the
possibility of receiving fresh insult from her brother he had given her
uncles a copy of her letter for the family to assemble upon and desired
to know as soon as possible the result of their deliberations 

he tells her that he shall bring her up the accounts relating to the
produce of her grandfather's estate and adjust them with her having
actually in his hands the arrears due to her from it 

he highly applauds the noble manner in which she resents your usage of
her it is impossible he owns that you can either deserve her or to
be forgiven but as you do justice to her virtue and offer to make her
all the reparation now in your power and as she is so very earnest with
him not to resent that usage and declares that you could not have been
the author of her calamities but through a strange concurrence of unhappy
causes and as he is not at a loss to know how to place to a proper
account that strange concurrence he desires her not to be apprehensive
of any vindictive measures from him 

nevertheless as may be expected he inveighs against you as he finds
that she gave you no advantage over her but he forbears to enter
further into this subject he says till he has the honour to see her 
and the rather as she seems so much determined against you however he
cannot but say that he thinks you a gallant man and a man of sense and
that you have the reputation of being thought a generous man in every
instance but where the sex is concerned in such he owns that you have
taken inexcusable liberties and he is sorry to say that there are very
few young men of fortune but who allow themselves in the same both
sexes he observes too much love to have each other in their power yet
he hardly ever knew man or woman who was very fond of power make a right
use of it 

if she be so absolutely determined against marrying you as she declares
she is he hopes he says to prevail upon her to take as soon as her
health will permit a little tour abroad with him as what will probably
establish it since traveling is certainly the best physic for all those
disorders which owe their rise to grief or disappointment an absence of
two or three years will endear her to every one on her return and every
one to her 

he expresses his impatience to see her he will set out he says the
moment he knows the result of her family's determination which he
doubts not will be favourable nor will he wait long for that 

when i had read the letter through to the languishing lady and so my
friends said she have i heard of a patient who actually died while
five or six principal physicians were in a consultation and not agreed
upon what name to give his distemper the patient was an emperor the
emperor joseph i think 

i asked if i should write to her cousin as he knew not how ill she was 
to hasten up 

by no means she said since if he were not already set out she was
persuaded that she should be so low by the time he could receive my
letter and come that his presence would but discompose and hurry her 
and afflict him 

i hope however she is not so very near her end and without saying any
more to her when i retired i wrote to colonel morden that if he
expects to see his beloved cousin alive he must lose no time in setting
out i sent this letter by his own servant 

dr h sent away his letter to her father by a particular hand this
morning 

mrs walton the milliner has also just now acquainted mrs smith that
her husband had a letter brought by a special messenger from parson
brand within this half hour enclosing the copy of one he had written to
mr john harlowe recanting his officious one 

and as all these and the copy of the lady's letter to col morden will
be with them pretty much at a time the devil's in the family if they are
not struck with a remorse that shall burst open the double-barred doors
of their hearts 

will engages to reach you with this late as it will be before you go
to rest he begs that i will testify for him the hour and the minute i
shall give it him it is just half an hour after ten 

i pretend to be now by use the swiftest short-hand writer in england 
next to yourself but were matter to arise every hour to write upon and
i had nothing else to do i cannot write so fast as you expect and let
it be remembered that your servants cannot bring letters or messages
before they are written or sent 



letter lviii

dr h to james harlowe senior esq 
london sept 4 


sir 

if i may judge of the hearts of other parents by my own i cannot doubt
but you will take it well to be informed that you have yet an opportunity
to save yourself and family great future regret by dispatching hither
some one of it with your last blessing and your lady's to the most
excellent of her sex 

i have some reason to believe sir that she has been represented to you
in a very different light from the true one and this it is that induces
me to acquaint you that i think her on the best grounds absolutely
irreproachable in all her conduct which has passed under my eye or come
to my ear and that her very misfortunes are made glorious to her and
honourable to all that are related to her by the use she has made of
them and by the patience and resignation with which she supports herself
in a painful lingering and dispiriting decay and by the greatness of
mind with which she views her approaching dissolution and all this from
proper motives from motives in which a dying saint might glory 

she knows not that i write i must indeed acknowledge that i offered to
do so some days ago and that very pressingly nor did she refuse me from
obstinacy she seemed not to know what that is but desired me to forbear
for two days only in hopes that her newly-arrived cousin who as she
heard was soliciting for her would be able to succeed in her favour 

i hope i shall not be thought an officious man on this occasion but if
i am i cannot help it being driven to write by a kind of parental and
irresistible impulse 

but sir whatever you think fit to do or permit to be done must be
speedily done for she cannot i verily think live a week and how long
of that short space she may enjoy her admirable intellects to take
comfort in the favours you may think proper to confer upon her cannot be
said i am sir 

your most humble servant 

r h 



letter lix

mr belford to william morden esq 
london sept 4 


sir 

the urgency of the case and the opportunity by your servant will
sufficiently apologize for this trouble from a stranger to your person 
who however is not a stranger to your merit 

i understand you are employing your good offices with the parents of
miss clarissa harlowe and other relations to reconcile them to the most
meritorious daughter and kinswoman that ever family had to boast of 

generously as this is intended by you we here have too much reason to
think all your solicitudes on this head will be unnecessary for it is
the opinion of every one who has the honour of being admitted to her
presence that she cannot lie over three days so that if you wish to
see her alive you must lose no time to come up 

she knows not that i write i had done it sooner if i had had the least
doubt that before now she would not have received from you some news of
the happy effects of your kind mediation in her behalf i am sir 

your most humble servant 
j belford 



letter lx

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
 in answer to letter lvii  
uxbridge tuesday morn between 4 and 5 


and can it be that this admirable creature will so soon leave this
cursed world for cursed i shall think it and more cursed myself when
she is gone o jack thou who canst sit so cool and like addison's
angel direct and even enjoy the storm that tears up my happiness by
the roots blame me not for my impatience however unreasonable if thou
knowest that already i feel the torments of the damned in the remorse
that wrings my heart on looking back upon my past actions by her thou
wouldst not be the devil thou art to halloo on a worrying conscience 
which without my merciless aggravations is altogether intolerable 

i know not what to write nor what i would write when the company that
used to delight me is as uneasy to me as my reflections are painful and
i can neither help nor divert myself must not every servant about me
partake in a perturbation so sincere 

shall i give thee a faint picture of the horrible uneasiness with which
my mind struggles and faint indeed it must be for nothing but
outrageous madness can exceed it and that only in the apprehension of
others since as to the sufferer it is certain that actual distraction
 take it out of its lucid intervals must be an infinitely more happy
state than the state of suspense and anxiety which often brings it on 

forbidden to attend the dear creature yet longing to see her i would
give the world to be admitted once more to her beloved presence i ride
towards london three or four times a day resolving pro and con twenty
times in two or three miles and at last ride back and in view of
uxbridge loathing even the kind friend and hospitable house turn my
horse's head again towards the town and resolve to gratify my humour 
let her take it as she will but at the very entrance of it after
infinite canvassings once more alter my mind dreading to offend and
shock her lest by that means i should curtail a life so precious 

yesterday in particular to give you an idea of the strength of that
impatience which i cannot avoid suffering to break out upon my servants 
i had no sooner dispatched will than i took horse to meet him on his
return 

in order to give him time i loitered about on the road riding up this
lane to the one highway down that to the other just as my horse
pointed all the way cursing my very being and though so lately looking
down upon all the world wishing to change conditions with the poorest
beggar that cried to me for charity as i rode by him and throwing him
money in hopes to obtain by his prayers the blessing my heart pants
after 

after i had sauntered about an hour or two which seemed three or four
tedious ones fearing i had slipt the fellow i inquired at every
turnpike whether a servant in such a livery had not passed through in
his return from london on a full gallop for woe had been to the dog 
had i met him on a sluggish trot and lest i should miss him at one end
of kensingtohn as he might take either the acton or hammersmith road or
at the other as he might come through the park or not how many score
times did i ride backwards and forwards from the palace to the gore 
making myself the subject of observation to all passengers whether on
horseback or on foot who no doubt wondered to see a well-dressed and
well-mounted man sometimes ambling sometimes prancing as the beast
had more fire than his master backwards and forwards in so short a
compass 

yet all this time though longing to espy the fellow did i dread to meet
him lest he should be charged with fatal tidings 

when at distance i saw any man galloping towards me my
resemblance-forming fancy immediately made it to be him and then my
heart choked me but when the person's nearer approach undeceived me 
how did i curse the varlet's delay and thee by turns and how ready
was i to draw my pistol at the stranger for having the impudence to
gallop which none but my messenger i thought had either right or
reason to do for all the business of the world i am ready to imagine 
should stand still on an occasion so melancholy and so interesting to me 
nay for this week past i could cut the throat of any man or woman i see
laugh while i am in such dejection of mind 

i am now convinced that the wretches who fly from a heavy scene labour
under ten times more distress in the intermediate suspense and
apprehension than they could have were they present at it and to see
and know the worst so capable is fancy or imagination the more
immediate offspring of the soul to outgo fact let the subject be either
joyous or grievous 

and hence as i conceive it is that all pleasures are greater in the
expectation or in the reflection than in fruition as all pains which
press heavy upon both parts of that unequal union by which frail
mortality holds its precarious tenure are ever most acute in the time of
suffering for how easy sit upon the reflection the heaviest misfortunes 
when surmounted but most easy i confess those in which body has more
concern than soul this however is a point of philosophy i have
neither time nor head just now to weigh so take it as it falls from a
madman's pen 

woe be to either of the wretches who shall bring me the fatal news that
she is no more for it is but too likely that a shriek-owl so hated will
never hoot or scream again unless the shock that will probably disorder
my whole frame on so sad an occasion by unsteadying my hand shall
divert my aim from his head heart or bowels if it turn not against my
own 

but surely she will not she cannot yet die such a matchless
excellence 

 whose mind
 contains a world and seems for all things fram'd 

could not be lent to be so soon demanded back again 

but may it not be that thou belford art in a plot with the dear
creature who will not let me attend her to convince myself in order
to work up my soul to the deepest remorse and that when she is
convinced of the sincerity of my penitence and when my mind is made such
wax as to be fit to take what impression she pleases to give it she
will then raise me up with the joyful tidings of her returning health and
acceptance of me 

what would i give to have it so and when the happiness of hundreds as
well as the peace and reconciliation of several eminent families depend
upon her restoration and happiness why should it not be so 

but let me presume it will let me indulge my former hope however
improbable i will and enjoy it too and let me tell thee how ecstatic
my delight would be on the unravelling of such a plot as this 

do dear belford let it be so and o my dearest and ever-dear
clarissa keep me no loner in this cruel suspense in which i suffer a
thousand times more than ever i made thee suffer nor fear thou that i
will resent or recede on an ecclaircissement so desirable for i will
adore thee for ever and without reproaching thee for the pangs thou hast
tortured me with confess thee as much my superior in virtue and honour 

but once more should the worst happen say not what that worst is and i
am gone from this hated island gone for ever and may eternal but i am
crazed already and will therefore conclude myself 

thine more than my own 
 and no great compliment neither 
r l 



letter lxi

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
tues sept 9 in the morn at mr smith's 


when i read yours of this morning i could not help pitying you for the
account you give of the dreadful anxiety and suspense you labour under 
i wish from my heart all were to end as you are so willing to hope but
it will not be and your suspense if the worst part of your torment as
you say it is will soon be over but alas in a way you wish not 

i attended the lady just now she is extremely ill yet is she aiming
at an answer to her norton's letter which she began yesterday in her own
chamber and has written a good deal but in a hand not like her own fine
one as mrs lovick tells me but larger and the lines crooked 

i have accepted of the offer of a room adjoining to the widow lovick's 
till i see how matters go but unknown to the lady and i shall go home
every night for a few hours i would not lose a sentence that i could
gain from lips so instructive nor the opportunity of receiving any
command from her for an estate 

in this my new apartment i now write and shall continue to write as
occasions offer that i may be the more circumstantial but i depend upon
the return of my letters or copies of them on demand that i may have
together all that relates to this affecting story which i shall
re-peruse with melancholy pleasure to the end of my life 

i think i will send thee brand's letter to mr john harlowe recanting
his base surmises it is a matchless piece of pedantry and may perhaps
a little divert thy deep chagrin some time hence at least it may if not
now 

what wretched creatures are there in the world what strangely mixed
creatures so sensible and so silly at the same time what a various 
what a foolish creature is man 


three o'clock 

the lady has just finished her letter and has entertained mrs lovick 
mrs smith and me with a noble discourse on the vanity and brevity of
life to which i cannot do justice in the repetition and indeed i am so
grieved for her that ill as she is my intellects are not half so clear
as her's 

a few things which made the strongest impression upon me as well from
the sentiments themselves as from her manner of uttering them i
remember she introduced them thus 

i am thinking said she what a gradual and happy death god almighty
 blessed be his name affords me who would have thought that suffering
what i have suffered and abandoned as i have been with such a
tender education as i have had i should be so long a dying but see now
by little and little it had come to this i was first take off from the
power of walking then i took a coach a coach grew too violent an
exercise then i took up a chair the prison was a large death-stride
upon me i should have suffered longer else next i was unable to go to
church then to go up or down stairs now hardly can move from one room
to another and a less room will soon hold me my eyes begin to fail me 
so that at times i cannot see to read distinctly and now i can hardly
write or hold a pen next i presume i shall know nobody nor be able
to thank any of you i therefore now once more thank you mrs lovick 
and you mrs smith and you mr belford while i can thank you for all
your kindness to me and thus by little and little in such a gradual
sensible death as i am blessed with god dies away in us as i may say 
all human satisfaction in order to subdue his poor creatures to himself 

thou mayest guess how affected we all were at this moving account of her
progressive weakness we heard it with wet eyes for what with the
women's example and what with her moving eloquence i could no more help
it than they but we were silent nevertheless and she went on applying
herself to me 

o mr belford this is a poor transitory life in the best enjoyments 
we flutter about here and there with all our vanities about us like
painted butterflies for a gay but a very short season till at last we
lay ourselves down in a quiescent state and turn into vile worms and
who knows in what form or to what condition we shall rise again 

i wish you would permit me a young creature just turned of nineteen
years of age blooming and healthy as i was a few months ago now nipt by
the cold hand of death to influence you in these my last hours to a
life of regularity and repentance for any past evils you may have been
guilty of for believe me sir that now in this last stage very few
things will bear the test or be passed as laudable if pardonable at
our own bar much less at a more tremendous one in all we have done or
delighted in even in a life not very offensive neither as we may think 
 ought we not then to study in our full day before the dark hours
approach so to live as may afford reflections that will soften the
agony of the last moments when they come and let in upon the departing
soul a ray of divine mercy to illuminate its passage into an awful
eternity 

she was ready to faint and choosing to lie down i withdrew i need not
say with a melancholy heart and when i got to my new-taken apartment my
heart was still more affected by the sight of the solemn letter the
admirable lady had so lately finished it was communicated to me by mrs 
lovick who had it to copy for me but it was not to be delivered to me
till after her departure however i trespassed so far as to prevail
upon the widow to let me take a copy of it which i did directly in
character 

i send it enclosed if thou canst read it and thy heart not bleed at
thy eyes thy remorse can hardly be so deep as thou hast inclined me to
think it is 



letter lxii

miss clarissa harlowe to mrs norton
 in answer to letter lvi  


 begun on monday sept 4 and by piecemeal finished on tuesday but not
sent till the thursday following 


my dearest mrs norton 

i am afraid i shall not be able to write all that is upon my mind to say
to you upon the subject of your last yet i will try 

as to my friends and as to the sad breakfasting i cannot help being
afflicted for them what alas has not my mother in particular 
suffered by my rashness yet to allow so much for a son so little for
a daughter but all now will soon be over as to me i hope they will
bury all their resentments in my grave 

as to your advice in relation to mr belford let me only say that the
unhappy reprobation i have met with and my short time must be my
apology now i wish i could have written to my mother and my uncles as
you advise and yet favours come so slowly from them 

the granting of one request only now remains as a desirable one from
them which nevertheless when granted i shall not be sensible of it
is that they will be pleased to permit my remains to be laid with those
of my ancestors placed at the feet of my dear grandfather as i have
mentioned in my will this however as they please for after all 
this vile body ought not so much to engage my cares it is a weakness 
but let it be called a natural weakness and i shall be excused 
especially when a reverential gratitude shall be known to be the
foundation of it you know my dear woman how my grandfather loved me 
and you know how much i honoured him and that from my very infancy to
the hour of his death how often since have i wished that he had not
loved me so well 

i wish not now at the writing of this to see even my cousin morden 
o my blessed woman my dear maternal friend i am entering upon a
better tour than to france or italy either or even than to settle at my
once-beloved dairy-house all these prospects and pleasures which used
to be so agreeable to me in health how poor seem they to me now 

indeed indeed my dear mamma norton i shall be happy i know i shall 
 i have charming forebodings of happiness already tell all my dear
friends for their comfort that i shall who would not bear the
punishments i have borne to have the prospects and assurances i rejoice
in assurances i might not have had were my own wishes to have been
granted to me 

neither do i want to see even you my dear mrs norton nevertheless i
must in justice to my own gratitude declare that there was a time 
could you have been permitted to come without incurring displeasure from
those whose esteem it is necessary for you to cultivate and preserve 
that your presence and comfortings would have been balm to my wounded
mind but were you now even by consent and with reconciliatory
tidings to come it would but add to your grief and the sight of one i
so dearly love so happily fraught with good news might but draw me back
to wishes i have had great struggles to get above and let me tell you
for your comfort that i have not left undone any thing that ought to be
done either respecting mind or person no not to the minutest
preparation so that nothing is left for you to do for me every one has
her direction as to the last offices and my desk that i now write upon
 o my dearest mrs norton all is provided all is ready and all will
be as decent as it should be 

and pray let my miss howe know that by the time you will receive this 
and she your signification of the contents of it will in all
probability be too late for her to do me the inestimable favour as i
should once have thought it to see me god will have no rivals in the
hearts of those he sanctifies by various methods he deadens all other
sensations or rather absorbs them all in the love of him 

i shall nevertheless love you my mamma norton and my miss howe whose
love to me has passed the love of woman to my latest hour but yet i
am now above the quick sense of those pleasures which once delighted me 
and once more i say that i do not wish to see objects so dear to me 
which might bring me back again into sense and rival my supreme love 


 


twice have i been forced to leave off i wished that my last writing
might be to you or to miss howe if it might not be to my dearest ma 

mamma i would have wrote is the word distinct my eyes are so misty 
if when i apply to you i break off in half-words do you supply them 
the kindest are your due be sure take the kindest to fill up chasms
with if any chasms there be 


 


another breaking off but the new day seems to rise upon me with healing
in its wings i have gotten i think a recruit of strength spirits i
bless god i have not of late wanted 

let my dearest miss howe purchase her wedding-garments and may all
temporal blessings attend the charming preparation blessings will i
make no question notwithstanding the little cloudiness that mr hickman
encounters with now and then which are but prognostications of a future
golden day to him for her heart is good and her head not wrong but
great merit is coy and that coyness had not always its foundation in
pride but if it should seem to be pride take off the skin-deep
covering and in her it is noble diffidence and a love that wants but
to be assured 

tell mr hickman i write this and write it as i believe with my last
pen and bid him bear a little at first and forbear and all the future
will be crowning gratitude and rewarding love for miss howe had great
sense fine judgment and exalted generosity and can such a one be
ungrateful or easy under those obligations which his assiduity and
obligingness when he shall be so happy as to call her his will lay her
under to him 

as for me never bride was so ready as i am my wedding garments are
bought and though not fine or gawdy to the sight though not adorned
with jewels and set off with gold and silver for i have no beholders'
eyes to wish to glitter in yet will they be the easiest the happiest
suit that ever bridal maiden wore for they are such as carry with them
a security against all those anxieties pains and perturbations which
sometimes succeed to the most promising outsettings 

and now my dear mrs norton do i wish for no other 

o hasten good god if it be thy blessed will the happy moment that i am
to be decked out in his all-quieting garb and sustain comfort bless 
and protect with the all-shadowing wing of thy mercy my dear parents my
uncles my brother my sister my cousin morden my ever-dear and
ever-kind miss howe my good mrs norton and every deserving person to
whom they wish well is the ardent prayer first and last of every
beginning hour as the clock tells it me hours now are days nay 
years of

your now not sorrowing or afflicted but happy 
clarissa harlowe 



letter lxiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wed morn sept 6 half an hour after three 


i am not the savage which you and my worst enemies think me my soul is
too much penetrated by the contents of the letter which you enclosed in
your last to say one word more to it than that my heart has bled over
it from every vein i will fly from the subject but what other can i
choose that will not be as grievous and lead into the same 

i could quarrel with all the world with thee as well as the rest 
obliging as thou supposest thyself for writing to me hourly how darest
thou though unknown to her to presume to take an apartment under the
sane roof with her i cannot bear to think that thou shouldest be seen 
at all hours passing to and repassing from her apartments while i who
have so much reason to call her mine and one was preferred by her to all
the world am forced to keep aloof and hardly dare to enter the city
where she is 

if there be any thing in brand's letter that will divert me hasten it to
me but nothing now will ever divert me will ever again give me joy or
pleasure i can neither eat drink nor sleep i am sick of all the
world 

surely it will be better when all is over when i know the worst the
fates can do against me yet how shall i bear that worst o belford 
belford write it not to me but if it must happen get somebody else to
write for i shall curse the pen the hand the head and the heart 
employed in communicating to me the fatal tidings but what is this
saying when already i curse the whole world except her myself most 

in fine i am a most miserable being life is a burden to me i would
not bear it upon these terms for one week more let what would be my lot 
for already is there a hell begun in my own mind never more mention it
to me let her or who will say it the prison i cannot bear it may
d n n seize quick the cursed woman who could set death upon taking
that large stride as the dear creature calls it i had no hand in it 
but her relations her implacable relations have done the business all
else would have been got over never persuade me but it would the fire
of youth and the violence of passion would have pleaded for me to good
purpose with an individual of a sex which loves to be addressed with
passionate ardour even to tumult had it not been for that cruelty and
unforgivingness which the object and the penitence considered have
no example and have aggravated the heinousness of my faults 

unable to rest though i went not to bed till two i dispatch this ere
the day dawn who knows what this night this dismal night may have
produced 

i must after my messenger i have told the varlet i will meet him 
perhaps at knightsbridge perhaps in piccadilly and i trust not myself
with pistols not only on his account but my own for pistols are too
ready a mischief 

i hope thou hast a letter ready for him he goes to thy lodgings first 
for surely thou wilt not presume to take thy rest in an apartment near
her's if he miss thee there he flies to smith's and brings me word
whether in being or not 

i shall look for him through the air as i ride as well as on horseback 
for if the prince of it serve me as well as i have served him he will
bring the dog by his ears like another habakkuk to my saddle-bow with
the tidings that my heart pants after 

nothing but the excruciating pangs the condemned soul fells at its
entrance into the eternity of the torments we are taught to fear can
exceed what i now feel and have felt for almost this week past and
mayest thou have a spice of those if thou hast not a letter ready
written for thy

lovelace 



letter lxiv

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
tueday sept 5 six o'clock 


the lady remains exceedingly weak and ill her intellects nevertheless 
continue clear and strong and her piety and patience are without
example every one thinks this night will be her last what a shocking
thing is that to say of such an excellence she will not however send
away her letter to her norton as yet she endeavoured in vain to
superscribe it so desired me to do it her fingers will not hold the
pen with the requisite steadiness she has i fear written and read her
last 


eight o'clock 

she is somewhat better than she was the doctor had been here and
thinks she will hold out yet a day or two he has ordered her as for
some time past only some little cordials to take when ready to faint 
she seemed disappointed when he told her she might yet live two or three
days and said she longed for dismission life was not so easily
extinguished she saw as some imagined death from grief was she
believed the slowest of deaths but god's will must be done her only
prayer was now for submission to it for she doubted not but by the
divine goodness she should be an happy creature as soon as she could be
divested of these rags of mortality 

of her own accord she mentioned you which till then she had avoided to
do she asked with great serenity where you were 

i told her where and your motives for being so near and read to her a
few lines of your's of this morning in which you mention your wishes to
see her your sincere affliction and your resolution not to approach her
without her consent 

i would have read more but she said enough mr belford enough poor
man does his conscience begin to find him then need not any body to
wish him a greater punishment may it work upon him to an happy purpose 

i took the liberty to say that as she was in such a frame that nothing
now seemed capable of discomposing her i could wish that you might have
the benefit of her exhortations which i dared to say while you were so
seriously affected would have a greater force upon you than a thousand
sermons and how happy you would think yourself if you could but receive
her forgiveness on your knees 

how can you think of such a thing mr belford said she with some
emotion my composure is owing next to the divine goodness blessing my
earnest supplications for it to the not seeing him yet let him know
that i now again repeat that i forgive him and may god almighty 
clasping her fingers and lifting up her eyes forgive him too and
perfect repentance and sanctify it to him tell him i say so and tell
him that if i could not say so with my whole heart i should be very
uneasy and think that my hopes of mercy were but weakly founded and
that i had still in my harboured resentment some hankerings after a
life which he has been the cause of shortening 

the divine creature then turning aside her head poor man said she i
once could have loved him this is saying more than ever i could say of
any other man out of my own family would he have permitted me to have
been an humble instrument to have made him good i think i could have
made him happy but tell him not this if he be really penitent it may
too much affect him there she paused 

admirable creature heavenly forgiver then resuming but pray tell
him that if i could know that my death might be a mean to reclaim and
save him it would be an inexpressible satisfaction to me 

but let me not however be made uneasy with the apprehension of seeing
him i cannot bear to see him 

just as she had done speaking the minister who had so often attended
her sent up his name and was admitted 

being apprehensive that it would be with difficulty that you could
prevail upon that impetuous spirit of your's not to invade her in her
dying hours and of the agonies into which a surprise of this nature
would throw her i thought this gentleman's visit afforded a proper
opportunity to renew the subject and having asked her leave 
acquainted him with the topic we had been upon 

the good man urged that some condescensions were usually expected on
these solemn occasions from pious souls like her's however satisfied
with themselves for the sake of showing the world and for example-sake 
that all resentments against those who had most injured them were
subdued and if she would vouchsafe to a heart so truly penitent as i
had represented mr lovelace's to be that personal pardon which i had
been pleading for there would be no room to suppose the least lurking
resentment remained and it might have very happy effects upon the
gentleman 

i have no lurking resentment sir said she this is not a time for
resentment and you will be the readier to believe me when i can assure
you looking at me that even what i have most rejoiced in the truly
friendly love that has so long subsisted between my miss howe and her
clarissa although to my last gasp it will be the dearest to me of all
that is dear in this life has already abated of its fervour has already
given place to supremer fervours and shall the remembrance of mr 
lovelace's personal insults which i bless god never corrupted that mind
which her friendship so much delighted be stronger in these hours with
me then the remembrance of a love as pure as the human heart ever
boasted tell therefore the world if you please and if mr 
belford you think what i said to you before not strong enough tell the
poor man that i not only forgive him but have such earnest wishes for
the good of his soul and that from consideration of its immortality 
that could my penitence avail for more sins than my own my last tear
should fall for him by whom i die 

our eyes and hands expressed to us both what our lips could not utter 

say not then proceeded she nor let it be said that my resentments are
unsubdued and yet these eyes lifted up to heaven as witness to the
truth of what i have said shall never if i can help it behold him
more for do you not consider sirs how short my time is what much
more important subjects i have to employ it upon and how unable i should
be so weak as i am to contend even with the avowed penitence of a
person in strong health governed by passions unabated and always
violent and now i hope you will never urge me more on this subject 

the minister said it were pity ever to urge this plea again 

you see lovelace that i did not forget the office of a friend in
endeavouring to prevail upon her to give you her last forgiveness
personally and i hope as she is so near her end you will not invade
her in her last hours since she must be extremely discomposed at such an
interview and it might make her leave the world the sooner for it 

this reminds me of an expression which she used on your barbarous hunting
of her at smith's on her return to her lodgings and that with a
serenity unexampled as mrs lovick told me considering the occasion 
and the trouble given her by it and her indisposition at the time he
will not let me die decently said the angelic sufferer he will not let
me enter into my maker's presence with the composure that is required in
entering into the drawing-room of an earthly prince 

i cannot however forbear to wish that the heavenly creature could have
prevailed upon herself in these her last hours to see you and that for
my sake as well as yours for although i am determined never to be
guilty of the crimes which till within these few past weeks have
blackened my former life and for which at present i most heartily hate
myself yet should i be less apprehensive of such a relapse if wrought
upon by the solemnity which such an interview must have been attended
with you had become a reformed man for no devil do i fear but one in
your shape 


 


it is now eleven o'clock at night the lady who retired to rest an hour
ago is as mrs lovick tells me in a sweet slumber 

i will close here i hope i shall find her the better for it in the
morning yet alas how frail is hope how frail is life when we are
apt to build so much on every shadowy relief although in such a
desperate case as this sitting down to reflect we must know that it is
but shadowy 

i will enclose brand's horrid pedantry and for once am aforehand with
thy ravenous impatience 



letter lxv

mr brand to mr john walton
sat night sept 2 


dear mr walton 

i am obliged to you for the very handsomely penned' and elegantly
written  letter which you have sent me on purpose to do justice' to
the character' of the younger' miss harlowe and yet i must tell you
that i had reason before that came  to think  and to know'
indeed that we were all wrong  and so i had employed the greatest
part' of this week  in drawing up an apologetical letter' to my worthy
patron  mr john harlowe in order to set all matters right' between
me and them  and as far as i could  between them' and miss 
so it required little more than connection' and transcribing  when i
received your's' and it will be with mr harlowe aforesaid to-morrow
morning' and this and the copy of that will be with you on monday
morning 

you cannot imagine how sorry i am that you' and mrs walton and mrs 
barker and i myself  should have taken matters up so lightly 
 judging alas-a-day by appearance and conjecture where character'
and reputation' are concerned horace says truly 

 et semel emissum volat irrevocabile verbum 

that is words one spoken cannot be recalled  but mr walton they
may be contradicted' by other' words and we may confess ourselves
guilty of a mistake  and express our concern' for being mistaken' 
and resolve to make our mistake' a warning' to us for the future' and
this is all that can be done  and what every worthy mind will do' and
what nobody can be readier to do' than we four undesigning offenders 
 as i see by your letter  on your part  and as you will see by the
enclosed copy  on mine' which if it be received as i think it
ought  and as i believe it will  must give me a speedy' opportunity
to see you when i visit the lady' to whom as you will see in it i
expect to be sent up with the olive-branch 

the matter in which we all erred  must be owned to be very nice' and
 mr belford's character considered' appearances' ran very strong
against the lady  but all that this serveth to show is that in
doubtful matters the wisest people may be mistaken' for so saith the
poet 

 fallitur in dubiis hominum solertia rebus 

if you have an opportunity  you may as if from yourself  and
unknown to me' show the enclosed to mr belford who you tell me 
resenteth' the matter very heinously but not to let him see' or hear
read  those words that relate to him  in the paragraph at the bottom
of the second page  beginning  'but yet i do insist upon it   to the
end' of that paragraph for one would not make one's self enemies  you
know and i have reason to think  that this mr belford' is as
passionate' and fierce' a man as mr lovelace what pity it is the
lady could find no worthier a protector  you may paste those lines
over with blue' or black paper  before he seeth it and if he
insisteth upon taking a copy of my letter for he or any body that
seeth it  or heareth it read  will no doubt be glad to have by them
the copy of a letter so full of the sentiments' of the noblest writers'
of antiquity  and so well adapted  as i will be bold to say they are 
to the point in hand' i say if he insisteth upon taking a copy let
him give you the strongest assurances' not to suffer it to be printed'
on any account' and i make the same request to you that you' will
not for if any thing be to be made of a man's works  who but the
author  should have the advantage' and if the spectators  the
tatlers  the examiners  the guardians  and other of our polite
papers make such a strutting' with a single verse  or so by way of
motto  in the front' of each day's' paper and if other authors'
pride themselves in finding out' and embellishing' the title-pages'
of their books' with a verse' or adage' from the classical writers' 
what a figure would such a letter as the enclosed make  so full fraught
with admirable precepts  and a-propos quotations  from the best
authority' 

i have been told that a certain noble lord  who once sat himself down
to write a pamphlet' in behalf of a great minister  after taking
infinite pains' to no purpose' to find a latin motto  gave commission
to a friend of his' to offer to any one  who could help him to a
suitable one  but of one or two lines a hamper of claret 
accordingly his lordship had a motto found him' from juvenal  which
he unhappily mistaking  not knowing juvenal' was a poet  printed
as a prose sentence' in his title-page 

if then one' or two' lines were of so much worth a hamper of
claret' no less' of what inestimable value' would such a letter as
mine' be deemed and who knoweth but that this noble p r who is now 
living if he should happen to see this letter' shining with such a
glorious string of jewels  might give the writer a scarf  in order to
have him always at hand  or be a mean' some way or other to bring
him into notice' and i would be bold to say bad' as the world' is 
a man of sound learning' wanteth nothing but an initiation' to make his
fortune 


 i e at the time this letter was written 


i hope my good friend that the lady will not die' i shall be much
grieved  if she doth and the more because of mine unhappy
misrepresentation' so will you' for the same cause' so will her
parents' and friends  they are very rich' and very worthy'
gentlefolks 

but let me tell you by-the-by  that they had carried the matter
against her so far  that i believe in my heart they were glad to
justify themselves' by my report' and would have been less pleased 
had i made a more favourable one  and yet in their hearts' they
dote' upon her but now they are all as i hear inclined to be
friends with her  and forgive her' her brother  as well as the
rest 

but their cousin  col morden a very fine gentleman  had had such
high words' with them and they with him that they know not how to
stoop  lest it should look like being frighted into an accommodation 
hence it is that i' have taken the greater liberty to press the
reconciliation' and i hope in such good season  that they will all be
pleased' with it for can they have a better handle' to save their
pride' all round than by my mediation' and let me tell you inter
nos betwixt ourselves  very proud they all are 

by this honest means  for by dishonest ones' i would not be
archbishop of canterbury  i hope to please every body to be
forgiven  in the first place  by the lady  whom being a lover of
learning' and learned men  i shall have great opportunities' of
obliging' for when she departed from her father's house i had but
just the honour of her notice  and she seemed highly pleased' with my
conversation' and next' to be thanked' and respected' by her
parents  and all her family' as i am i bless god for it by my dear
friend' mr john harlowe who indeed is a man that professeth a great
esteem' for men of erudition' and who with singular delight  i know 
will run over with me the authorities' i have quoted  and wonder' at
my memory  and the happy knack' i have of recommending mine own sense
of things' in the words of the greatest sages of antiquity 

excuse me my good friend for this seeming vanity  the great cicero
 you must have heard i suppose had a much greater' spice of it and
wrote a long letter begging' and praying' to be flattered  but if i
say less of myself' than other people who know me say of me  i think
i keep a medium' between vanity' and false modesty' the latter of
which oftentimes gives itself the lie  when it is declaring of' the
compliments  that every body' gives it as its due an hypocrisy as
well as folly that i hope i shall for ever scorn to be guilty of 

i have another reason' as i may tell to you my old school-fellow' to
make me wish for this fine lady's recovery' and health' and that is 
 by some distant intimations i have heard from mr john harlowe that
it is very likely' because of the slur' she hath received that she
will choose to live privately' and penitently' and will probably when
she cometh into her estate' keep a chaplain' to direct her in her
devotions' and penitence' if she doth who can stand a better chance'
than myself' and as i find by your' account as well as by every
body's' that she is innocent as to intention  and is resolved never to
think of mr lovelace more  who knoweth what' in time may happen' 
 and yet it must be after mr lovelace's death  which may possibly
sooner happen than he thinketh' of by means of his detestable
courses' for after all a man who is of public utility  ought not
 for the finest woman' in the world to lay his throat' at the mercy'
of a man who boggleth at nothing 

i beseech you let not this hint go farther' than to yourself  your
spouse  and mrs barker  i know i may trust my life' in your
hands' and theirs  there have been let me tell ye unlikelier'
things come to pass and that with rich widows  some of quality'
truly whose choice in their first marriages' hath perhaps been
guided by motives of convenience  or mere corporalities  as i may
say but who by their second' have had for their view the corporal' and
spiritual' mingled which is the most eligible no doubt to substance'
composed of both  as men' and women' are 

nor think sir that should such a thing come to pass either' would be
disgraced  since the lady' in me' would marry a gentleman' and a
scholar' and as to mine own honour  as the slur' would bring her
high fortunes' down to an equivalence' with my mean ones  if
fortune' only and not merit  be considered so hath not the life'
of this lady' been so tainted  either by length of time  or
naughtiness of practice  as to put her on a foot' with the cast
abigails  that too too often god knoweth are thought good enough
for a young clergyman  who perhaps is drawn in by a poor benefice' 
and if the wicked one' be not quite worn out' groweth poorer and
poorer upon it by an increase of family' he knoweth not whether is
most his  or his noble  ignoble  i should say patrons 

but all this apart  and in confidence 

i know you made at school but a small progress in languages  so i have
restrained myself from many illustrations' from the classics  that i
could have filled this letter with as i have done the enclosed one 
and being at a distance  i cannot explain' them to you as i do to
my friend  mr john harlowe and who after all is obliged to me'
for pointing out to him' many beauties' of the authors i quote  which
otherwise would lie concealed from him  as they must from every common
observer  but this too inter nos' for he would not take it well to
have it known' jays' you know old school-fellow jays  you know 
will strut in peacocks' feathers 

but whither am i running i never know where to end when i get upon
learned topics  and albeit i cannot compliment you' with the name of
a learned man  yet are you a sensible man' and as such' must have
pleasure' in learned men  and in their writings 

in this confidence mr walton with my kind respects' to the good
ladies your spouse' and sister  and in hopes for the young lady's
sake  soon to follow this long long epistle in person  i conclude
myself 

your loving and faithful friend 
elias brand 


you will perhaps mr walton wonder at the meaning of the lines drawn
 under many of the words and sentences  underscoring we call it 
 and were my letters to be printed those would be put in a
 different character  now you must know sir that we learned
 men' do this to point out to the readers who are not so learned 
 where the jet of our arguments lieth  and the emphasis' they are
 to lay upon those words' whereby they will take in readily our
 sense' and cogency  some pragmatical' people have said that
 an author who doth a great deal of this  either calleth his
 readers fools  or tacitly condemneth his own style  as
 supposing his meaning would be dark' without it or that all of
 his force' lay in words  but all of those with whom i have
 conversed in a learned way think as i think  and to give a very
 pretty  though familiar illustration  i have considered a page
 distinguished by different characters  as a verdant field'
 overspread with butter-flowers' and daisies  and other
 summer-flowers these the poets liken to enamelling' have you
 not read in the poets of enamelled meads  and so forth 



letter lxvi

mr brand to john harlowe esq 
sat night sept 2 


worthy sir 

i am under no small concern  that i should unhappily be the
occasion' i am sure i intended' nothing like it of widening
differences' by light misreport  when it is the duty' of one of my
function' and no less consisting with my inclination' to heal' and
reconcile 

i have received two letter to set me right' one from a particular
acquaintance  whom i set to inquire of mr belford's character and
that came on tuesday last informing me that your unhappy niece' was
greatly injured in the account i had had of her for i had told him'
of it and that with very great concern  i am sure apprehending it to
be true  so i then' set about writing to you to acknowledge' the
error  and had gone a good way in it when the second letter came a
very handsome one' it is both in style' and penmanship' from my
friend mr walton though i am sure it cannot be his inditing  
expressing his sorrow and his wife's and his sister-in-law's likewise 
for having been the cause of misleading me  in the account i gave of
the said young lady' whom they now' say upon further inquiry' they
find to be the most unblameable  and most prudent  and it seems the
most pious' young lady that ever once committed a great error' as
 to be sure her's was  in leaving such worthy parents' and
relations' for so vile a man' as mr lovelace but what shall we say 
why the divine virgil tells us 

 improbe amor quid non mortalia pectora cogis 

for my part  i was but too much afraid for we have great
opportunities  you are sensible sir at the university  of knowing
human nature' from books  the calm result' of the wise man's
wisdom  as i may say 

  haurit aquam cribro qui discere vult sine libro 

uninterrupted' by the noise' and vanities' that will mingle with
personal conversation  which in the turbulent world' is not to be
enjoyed but over a bottle  where you have an hundred foolish things'
pass to one that deserveth to be remembered' i was but too much afraid
i say' that so great a slip' might be attended with still greater'
and worse' for your' horace and my' horace the most charming writer
that ever lived among the pagans' for the lyric kind of poetry  i
mean for the be sure homer' and virgil' would otherwise' be first'
named in their way' well observeth and who understood human nature'
better than he 

 nec vera virtus cum semel excidit 
 curat reponi deterioribus 

and ovid' no less wisely observeth 

 et mala sunt vicina bonis errore sub illo
 pro vitio virtus crimina saepe tulit 

who that can draw knowledge' from its fountain-head  the works of the
sages of antiquity  improved by the comments' of the moderns  but
would prefer' to all others the silent quiet life  which
contemplative men' lead in the seats of learning  were they not called
out according to their dedication' to the service' and instruction'
of the world 

now sir another' favourite poet of mine and not the less a
favourite' for being a christian' telleth us that ill is the custom of
some  when in a fault  to throw the blame upon the backs of others 

  hominum quoque mos est 
 quae nos cunque premunt alieno imponere tergo 
 mant 

but i though in this case misled  well intendedly  nevertheless 
both in the misleaders' and misled  and therefore entitled to lay hold
of that plea if any body' is so entitled will not however be classed
among such extenuators' but contrarily will always keep in mind that
verse which comforteth in mistake  as well as instructeth' and which
i quoted in my last letter 

 errare est hominis sed non persistere 

and will own that i was very rash' to take up with conjectures' and
consequences' drawn from probabilites  where especially the
character' of so fine a lady' was concerned 

 credere fallacy gravis est dementia famae  mant 

notwithstanding miss clarissa harlowe i must be bold to say is the
only young lady  that ever i heard of or indeed read of that having
made such a false step  so soon' of her own accord  as i may say 
recovered' herself and conquered her love of the deceiver' a great
conquest indeed and who flieth him and resolveth to die  rather than
to be his which now to her never-dying honour' i am well assured is
the case and in justice' to her i am now ready to take to myself
 with no small vexation that of ovid 

 heu patior telis vulnera facta meis 

but yet i do insist upon it that all that part' of my information 
which i took upon mine own personal inquiry  which is what relates to
mr belford' and his character  is literally true' for there is not
any where to be met with a man of a more libertine character' as to
women  mr lovelace' excepted than he beareth 

and so sir i must desire of you that you will not let any blame' lie
upon my intention' since you see how ready i am to accuse myself' of
too lightly giving ear to a rash information' not knowing it to be so 
however for i depended the more upon it as the people i had it from'
are very sober  and live in the fear of god' and indeed when i wait
upon you you will see by their letter that they must be conscientious'
good people wherefore sir let me be entitled from all your good
family  to that of my last-named poet 

 aspera confesso verba remitte reo 

and now sir what is much more becoming of my function  let me 
instead of appearing with the face of an accuser  and a rash
censurer  which in my heart' i have not deserved' to be thought 
assume the character of a reconciler' and propose by way of penance'
to myself for my fault' to be sent up as a messenger of peace' to the
pious young lady' for they write me word absolutely' and i believe
in my heart truly' that the doctors' have given her over  and that
she cannot live  alas alas what a sad thing would that be if the
poor bough  that was only designed as i very well know  and am
fully assured' to be bent should be broken 

let it not dear sir seem to the world' that there was any thing in
your resentments' which while meant for reclaiming  were just and
fit that hath the appearance' of violence  and fierce wrath  and
inexorability' as it would look to some if carried to extremity 
after repentance' and contrition  and humiliation  on the fair
offender's' side for all this while it seemeth she hat been a second
magdalen' in her penitence  and yet not so bad as a magdalen' in her
faults' faulty nevertheless as she hath been once the lord knoweth 

 nam vitiis nemo sine nascitur optimus ille est 
 qui minimis urgentur' saith horace 

now sir if i may be named for this blessed' employment for blessed
is the peace-maker  i will hasten to london and as i know miss had
always a great regard' to the function' i have the honour to be of i
have no doubt of making myself acceptable to her and to bring her by
sound arguments  and good advice  into a liking of life  which must
be the first step' to her recovery' for when the mind' is made
easy  the body' will not long suffer' and the love of life' is a
natural passion  that is soon revived  when fortune turneth about 
and smileth 

 vivere quisque diu quamvis and egenus and ager 
 optat  ovid 

and the sweet lucan truly observeth 

  fatis debentibus annos
 mors invita subit 

and now sir let me tell you what shall be the tenor' of my pleadings'
with her and comfortings' of her as she is as i may say a learned
lady' and as i can explain' to her those sentences  which she cannot
so readily construe herself' and this in order to convince you' did
you not already know' my qualifications' how well qualified i am' for
the christian office' to which i commend myself 

i will in the first place put her in mind of the common course of
things' in this sublunary world  in which joy' and sorrow sorrow'
and joy  succeed one another by turns' in order to convince her that
her griefs have been but according to that' common course of things 

 gaudia post luctus veniunt post gaudia luctus 

secondly i will remind her of her own notable description of sorrow 
whence she was once called upon to distinguish wherein sorrow grief 
and melancholy  differed from each other which she did impromptu  by
their effects  in a truly admirable manner to the high satisfaction of
every one i myself could not by study  have distinguished better 
nor more concisely' sorrow said she wears' grief tears' but
melancholy sooths 

my inference to her shall be that since a happy reconciliation will take
place grief' will be banished sorrow' dismissed and only sweet
melancholy' remain to sooth' and indulge' her contrite heart  and
show to all the world the penitent sense she hath of her great error 

thirdly that her joys  when restored to health and favour will be
the greater the deeper her griefs were 


 joy  let me here observe my dear sir by way of note is not
absolutely inconsistent with melancholy' a soft gentle joy  not a
rapid  not a rampant joy  however but such a joy  as shall lift
her temporarily' out of her soothing melancholy  and then let her
down gently' into it again for melancholy  to be sure her
reflection' will generally make to be her state 


 gaudia quae multo parta labore placent 

fourthly that having really' been guilty of a great error  she should
not take impatiently' the correction' and anger' with which she hath
been treated 

 leniter ex merito quicquid patiare ferundum est 

fifthly that virtue' must be established by patience' as saith
prudentius 

 haec virtus vidua est quam non patientia firmat 

sixthly that in the words of horace she may expect better times  than
 of late she had reason' to look for 

 grata superveniet quae non sperabitur hora 

seventhly that she is really now in a way' to be happy  since 
according to ovid  she can count up all her woe' 

 felix qui patitur quae numerare potest 

and those comforting lines 

 estque serena dies post longos gratior imbres 
 et post triste malum gratior ipsa salus 

eighthly that in the words of mantuan her parents' and uncles' could
not help loving her' all the time they were angry at her' 

 aequa tamen mens est and amica voluntas 
 sit licet in natos austere parentum 

ninthly that the ills she hath met with' may be turned by the good
use' to be made of them to her everlasting benefit' for that 

 cum furit atque ferit deus olim parcere quaerit 

tenthly that she will be able to give a fine lesson' a very' fine
lesson to all the young ladies' of her acquaintance  of the vanity'
of being lifted up' in prosperity  and the weakness' of being cast
down' in adversity' since no one is so high  as to be above being
humbled' so low  as to need to despair' for which purpose the
advice of ausonius 

 dum fortuna juvat caveto tolli 
 dum fortuna tonat caveto mergi 

i shall tell her that lucan saith well when he calleth adversity the
element of patience' 

  gaudet patientia duris 

that

 fortunam superat virtus prudential famam 

that while weak souls are crushed by fortune  the brave mind' maketh
the fickle deity afraid of it 

 fortuna fortes metuit ignavos permit 

eleventhly that if she take the advice of horace 

 fortiaque adversis opponite pectora rebus 

it will delight her hereafter' as virgil' saith to revoke her past
troubles' 

  forsan and haec olim meminisse juvabit 

and to the same purpose juvenal' speaking of the prating joy' of
mariners after all their dangers are over' 

 gaudent securi narrare pericula nautae 

which suiting the case so well you'll forgive me sir for popping
down' in english metre  as the translative impulse' pardon a new
word and yet we scholars' are not fond of authenticating new' words 
came upon me uncalled for' 

 the seaman safe on shore with joy doth tell
 what cruel dangers him at sea befell 

with these  sir and an hundred more' wise adages  which i have
always at my fingers' end  will i when reduced to form' and method' 
entertain miss and as she is a well-read  and i might say but for
this one' great error a wise' young lady i make no doubt but i shall
prevail' upon her if not by mine own arguments  by those of wits'
and capacities' that have a congeniality' as i may say to her own 
to take to heart 

 nor of the laws of fate complain 
 since though it has been cloudy now't clears up again 

oh what wisdom' is there in these noble classical authors  a wise
man' will upon searching into them always find that they speak his'
sense of men' and things  hence it is that they so readily occur to
my memory' on every occasion though this may look like vanity  it is
too true to be omitted and i see not why a man may not know these
things of himself  which every body' seeth and saith of him' who 
nevertheless perhaps know not half so much as he  in other matters 

i know but of one objection  sir that can lie against my going and
that will arise from your kind care' and concern' for the safety of my
person  in case that fierce' and terrible man  the wicked mr 
lovelace of whom every one standeth in fear should come cross me as
he may be resolved to try once more to gain a footing in miss's
affections' but i will trust in providence' for my safety  while i
shall be engaged in a cause so worthy of my function' and the more'
trust in it as he is a learned man' as i am told 

strange too that so vile a rake' i hope he will never see this 
should be a learned man' that is to say that a learned man' may be a
sly sinner  and take opportunities as they come in his way' which 
however i do assure you i never did 

i repeat that as he is a learned man  i shall vest myself  as i may
say in classical armour' beginning meekly' with him for sir 
bravery' and meekness' are qualities very consistent with each other 
and in no persons so shiningly exert' themselves as in the christian
priesthood' beginning meekly' with him i say from ovid 

 corpora magnanimo satis est protrasse leoni 

so that if i should not be safe behind the shield of mine own
prudence  i certainly should be behind the shields' of the
ever-admirable classics' of horace' particularly who being a rake'
 and a jovial rake' too himself must have great weight with all
learned rakes 

and who knoweth but i may be able to bring even this goliath in
wickedness  although in person' but a little david' myself armed
with the slings' and stones' of the ancient sages  to a due sense of
his errors and what a victory would that be 

i could here sir pursuing the allegory of david and goliath give you
some of the stones' hard arguments' may be called stones  since they
knock down a pertinacious opponent' which i could pelt him with  were
he to be wroth with me and this in order to take from you sir all
apprehensions for my life  or my bones' but i forbear them till you
demand them of me when i have the honour to attend you in person 

and now my dear sir what remaineth but that having shown you what
yet i believe you did not doubt how well qualified' i am to attend
the lady with the olive-branch  i beg of you to dispatch me with it
out of hand' for if she be so very ill  and if she should not live
to receive the grace which to my knowledge all the worthy family'
design her how much will that grieve you all and then sir of what
avail will be the eulogies' you shall all peradventure join to give to
her memory for as martial wisely observeth 

  post cineres gloria sera venit 

then as ausonius' layeth it down with equal propriety  that those
favours which are speedily conferred are the most grateful and obliging'
 

and to the same purpose ovid 

 gratia ab officio quod mora tar dat abest 

and sir whatever you do let the lady's pardon' be as ample  and as
cheerfully given  as she can wish for it' that i may be able to tell
her that it hath your hands  your countenances  and your whole
hearts  with it for as the latin verse hath it and i presume to
think i have not weakened its sense by my humble advice 

 dat bene dat multum qui dat cum munere vultum 

and now sir when i survey this long letter albeit i see it
enamelled as a beautiful meadow' is enamelled by the spring' or
summer' flowers very glorious to behold i begin to be afraid that i
may have tired you and the more likely as i have written without that
method' or order  which i think constituteth the beauty' of good
writing' which method' or order  nevertheless may be the better
excused' in a familiar epistle  as this may be called you pardoning 
sir the familiarity' of the word' but yet not altogether here  i
must needs own because this is a letter' and not a letter  as i may
say but a kind of short' and pithy discourse  touching upon various'
and sundry topics  every one of which might be a fit theme' to enlarge
upon of volumes if this epistolary discourse' then let me call it 
should be pleasing to you as i am inclined to think it will because of
the sentiments' and aphorisms' of the wisest of the antients  which
glitter through it' like so many dazzling sunbeams  i will at my
leisure work it up into a methodical discourse' and perhaps may one
day print it with a dedication' to my honoured patron  if sir i
have your' leave singly' at first but not till i have thrown out
anonymously  two or three smaller things  by the success of which i
shall have made myself of some account' in the commonwealth of
letters  and afterwards in my works' not for the vanity' of the
thing however i will say but for the use' it may be of to the
public' for as one well observeth though glory always followeth
virtue yet it should be considered only as its shadow 


 and here by way of note permit me to say that no sermon' i ever
composed cost me half the pains' that this letter hath done but i knew
your great appetite' after as well as admiration' of the antient
wisdom  which you so justly prefer to the modern' and indeed i join
with you to think that the modern' is only borrowed  as the moon'
doth its light from the sun  at least that we excel' them in
nothing and that our best cogitations' may be found generally
speaking more elegantly' dressed and expressed by them 


 contemnit laudem virtus licet usque sequatur
 gloria virtutem corpus ut umbra suum 

a very pretty saying and worthy of all men's admiration 

and now most worthy sir  my very good friend and patron referring
the whole to your's  and to your two brothers  and to young mr 
harlowe's' consideration and to the wise consideration of good madam
harlowe  and her excellent daughter miss arabella harlowe' i take the
liberty to subscribe myself what i truly am  and every shall delight
to be  in all cases  and at all times 

your and their most ready and obedient
as well as faithful servant 
elias brand 



letter lxvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
 in answer to letter lxiv of this volume  
wedn morn sept 6 


and is she somewhat better blessings upon thee without number or
measure let her still be better and better tell me so at least if
she be not so for thou knowest not what a joy that poor temporary
reprieve that she will hold out yet a day or two gave me 

but who told this hard-hearted and death-pronouncing doctor that she will
hold it no longer by what warrant says he this what presumption in
these parading solemn fellows of a college which will be my contempt to
the latest hour of my life if this brother of it eminent as he is
deemed to be cannot work an ordinary miracle in her favour or rather in
mine 

let me tell thee belford that already he deserves the utmost contempt 
for suffering this charming clock to run down so low what must be his
art if it could not wind it up in a quarter of the time he has attended
her when at his first visits the springs and wheels of life and motion
were so god that they seemed only to want common care and oiling 

i am obliged to you for endeavouring to engage her to see me twas
acting like a friend if she had vouchsafed me that favour she should
have seen at her feet the most abject adorer that ever kneeled to
justly-offended beauty 

what she bid you and what she forbid you to tell me the latter for
tender considerations that she forgives me and that could she have
made me a good man she would have made me a happy one that she even
loved me at such a moment to own that she once loved me never before
loved any man that she prays for me that her last tear should be shed
for me could she by it save a soul doomed without her to perdition 
o belford belford i cannot bear it what a dog what a devil have i
been to a goodness so superlative why does she not inveigh against me 
 why does she not execrate me o the triumphant subduer ever above
me and now to leave me so infinitely below her 

marry and repair at any time this wretch that i was was my plea to
myself to give her a lowering sensibility to bring her down from among
the stars which her beamy head was surrounded by that my wife so
greatly above me might not despise me this was one of my reptile
motives owing to my more reptile envy and to my consciousness of
inferiority to her yet she from step to step from distress to
distress to maintain her superiority and like the sun to break out
upon me with the greater refulgence for the clouds that i had contrived
to cast about her and now to escape me thus no power left me to
repair her wrongs no alleviation to my self-reproach no dividing of
blame with her 

tell her o tell her belford that her prayers and wishes her
superlatively-generous prayers and wishes shall not be vain that i can 
and do repent and long have repented tell her of my frequent deep
remorses it was impossible that such remorses should not at last produce
effectual remorse yet she must not leave me she must live if she would
wish to have my contrition perfect for what can despair produce 


 


i will do every thing you would have me do in the return of your
letters you have infinitely obliged me by this last and by pressing
for an admission for me though it succeeded not 

once more how could i be such a villain to so divine a creature yet
love her all the time as never man loved woman curse upon my
contriving genius curse upon my intriguing head and upon my seconding
heart to sport with the fame with the honour with the life of such
an angel of a woman o my d d incredulity that believing her to be
a woman i must hope to find her a woman on my incredulity that there
could be such virtue virtue for virtue's sake in the sex founded i my
hope of succeeding with her 

but say not jack that she must leave us yet if she recover and if i
can but re-obtain her favour then indeed will life be life to me the
world never saw such an husband as i will make i will have no will but
her's she shall conduct me in all my steps she shall open and direct
my prospects and turn every motion of my heart as she pleases 

you tell me in your letter that at eleven o'clock she had sweet rest 
and my servant acquaints me from mrs smith that she has had a good
night what hopes does this fill me with i have given the fellow five
guineas for his good news to be divided between him and his
fellow-servant 

dear dear jack confirm this to me in thy next for heaven's sake do 
tell the doctor i'll make a present of a thousand guineas if he recover
her ask if a consultation then be necessary 

adieu dear belford confirm i beseech thee the hopes that now with
sovereign gladness have taken possession of a heart that next to
her's is

thine 



letter lxviii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
wedn morn eight o'clock 6 sept 


your servant arrived here before i was stirring i sent him to smith's
to inquire how the lady was and ordered him to call upon me when he came
back i was pleased to hear she had tolerable rest as soon as i had
dispatched him with the letter i had written over night i went to attend
her 

i found hr up and dressed in a white sattin night-gown ever elegant 
but now more so than i had seen her for a week past her aspect serenely
cheerful 

she mentioned the increased dimness of her eyes and the tremor which had
invaded her limbs if this be dying said she there is nothing at all
shocking in it my body hardly sensible of pain my mind at ease my
intellects clear and perfect as ever what a good and gracious god have
i for this is what i always prayed for 

i told her it was not so serene with you 

there is not the same reason for it replied she tis a choice comfort 
mr belford at the winding up of our short story to be able to say i
have rather suffered injuries myself than offered them to others i
bless god though i have bee unhappy as the world deems it and once i
thought more so than at present i think i ought to have done since my
calamities were to work out for me my everlasting happiness yet have i
not wilfully made any one creature so i have no reason to grieve for
any thing but for the sorrow i have given my friends 

but pray mr belford remember me in the best manner to my cousin
morden and desire him to comfort them and to tell them that all would
have been the same had they accepted of my true penitence as i wish and
as i trust the almighty has done 

i was called down it was to harry who was just returned from miss
howe's to whom he carried the lady's letter the stupid fellow being
bid to make haste with it and return as soon as possible staid not
until miss howe had it she being at the distance of five minutes 
although mrs howe would have had him stay and sent a man and horse
purposely with it to her daughter 


wednesday morning ten o'clock 

the poor lady is just recovered from a fainting fit which has left her
at death's door her late tranquillity and freedom from pain seemed but
a lightening as mrs lovick and mrs smith call it 

by my faith lovelace i had rather part with all the friends i have in
the world than with this lady i never knew what a virtuous a holy
friendship as i may call mine to her was before but to be so new to
it and to be obliged to forego it so soon what an affliction yet 
thank heaven i lose her not by my own fault but twould be barbarous
not to spare thee now 

she has sent for the divine who visited her before to pray with her 



letter lxix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
kensington wednesday noon 


like aesop's traveller thou blowest hot and cold life and death in the
same breath with a view no doubt to distract me how familiarly dost
thou use the words dying dimness tremor never did any mortal ring so
many changes on so few bells thy true father i dare swear was a
butcher or an undertaker by the delight thou seemest to take in scenes
of death and horror thy barbarous reflection that thou losest her not
by thy own fault is never to be forgiven thou hast but one way to
atone for the torments thou hast given me and that is by sending me
word that she is better and will recover whether it be true or not 
let me be told so and i will go abroad rejoicing and believing it and
my wishes and imaginations shall make out all the rest 

if she live but one year that i may acquit myself to myself no matter
for the world that her death is not owing to me i will compound for
the rest 

will neither vows nor prayers save her i never prayed in my life put
all the years of it together as i have done for this fortnight past and
i have most sincerely repented of all my baseness to her and will
nothing do 

but after all if she recovers not this reflection must be my comfort 
and it is truth that her departure will be owing rather to wilfulness 
to downright female wilfulness than to any other cause 

it is difficult for people who pursue the dictates of a violent
resentment to stop where first they designed to stop 

i have the charity to believe that even james and arabella harlowe at
first intended no more by the confederacy they formed against this their
angel sister than to disgrace and keep her down lest sordid wretches 
their uncles should follow the example their grandfather had set to
their detriment 

so this lady as i suppose intended only at first to vex and plague me 
and finding she could do it to purpose her desire of revenge insensibly
became stronger in her than the desire of life and now she is willing to
die as an event which she thinks will cut my heart-strings asunder and
still the more to be revenged puts on the christian and forgives me 

but i'll have none of her forgiveness my own heart tells me i do not
deserve it and i cannot bear it and what is it but a mere verbal
forgiveness as ostentatiously as cruelly given with a view to magnify
herself and wound me deeper a little dear specious but let me stop
 lest i blaspheme 


 


reading over the above i am ashamed of my ramblings but what wouldest
have me do seest thou not that i am but seeking to run out of myself 
in hope to lose myself yet that i am unable to do either 

if ever thou lovedst but half so fervently as i love but of that thy
heavy soul is not capable 

send me word by the next i conjure thee in the names of all her kindred
saints and angels that she is living and likely to live if thou
sendest ill news thou wilt be answerable for the consequences whether
it be fatal to the messenger or to

thy
lovelace 



letter lxx

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
wednesday eleven o'clock 


dr h has just been here he tarried with me till the minister had done
praying by the lady and then we were both admitted mr goddard who
came while the doctor and the clergyman were with her went away with
them when they went they took a solemn and everlasting leave of her as
i have no scruple to say blessing her and being blessed by her and
wishing when it came to be their lot for an exit as happy as her's is
likely to be 

she had again earnestly requested of the doctor his opinion how long it
was now probable that she could continue and he told her that he
apprehended she would hardly see to-morrow night she said she should
number the hours with greater pleasure than ever she numbered any in her
life on the most joyful occasion 

how unlike poor belton's last hours her's see the infinite differences
in the effects on the same awful and affecting occasion between a good
and a bad conscience 

this moment a man is come from miss howe with a letter perhaps i shall
be able to send you the contents 


 


she endeavoured several times with earnestness but in vain to read the
letter of her dear friend the writing she said was too fine for her
grosser sight and the lines staggered under her eye and indeed she
trembled so she could not hold the paper and at last desired mrs 
lovick to read it to her the messenger waiting for an answer 

thou wilt see in miss howe's letter how different the expression of the
same impatience and passionate love is when dictated by the gentler
mind of a woman from that which results from a mind so boisterous and
knotty as thine for mrs lovick will transcribe it and i shall send
it to be read in this place if thou wilt 


miss howe to miss clarissa harlowe
tuesday sept 5 


o my dearest friend 

what will become of your poor anna howe i see by your writing as well
as read by your own account which were you not very very ill you
would have touched more tenderly how it is with you why have i thus
long delayed to attend you could i think that the comfortings of a
faithful friend were as nothing to a gentle mind in distress that i
could be prevailed upon to forbear visiting you so much as once in all
this time i as well as every body else to desert and abandon my dear
creature to strangers what will become of you if you be as bad as my
apprehensions make you 

i will set out this moment little as the encouragement is that you give
me to do so my mother is willing i should why o why was she not
before willing 

yet she persuades me too lest i should be fatally affected were i to
find my fears too well justified to wait the return of this messenger 
who rides our swiftest horse god speed him with good news to me one
line from your hand by him send me but one line to bid me attend you 
i will set out the moment the very moment i receive it i am now
actually ready to do so and if you love me as i love you the sight
of me will revive you to my hopes but why why when i can think this 
did i not go up sooner 

blessed heaven deny not to my prayers my friend my admonisher my
adviser at a time so critical to myself 

but methinks your style and sentiments are too well connected too
full of life and vigour to give cause for so much despair as thy
staggering pen seems to forbode 

i am sorry i was not at home  i must add thus much though the servant
is ready mounted at the door   when mr belford's servant came with your
affecting letter i was at miss lloyd's my mamma sent it to me and i
came home that instant but he was gone he would not stay it seems 
yet i wanted to ask him an hundred thousand questions but why delay i
thus my messenger i have a multitude of things to say to you to advise
with you about you shall direct me in every thing i will obey the
holding up of your finger but if you leave me what is the world or
any thing in it to your

anna howe 


the effect this letter had on the lady who is so near the end which the
fair writer so much apprehends and deplores obliged mrs lovick to make
many breaks in reading it and many changes of voice 

this is a friend said the divine lady taking the letter in her hand 
and kissing it worth wishing to live for o my dear anna howe how
uninterruptedly sweet and noble has been our friendship but we shall
one day meet and this hope must comfort us both never to part again 
then divested of the shades of body shall be all light and all mind 
then how unalloyed how perfect will be our friendship our love then
will have one and the same adorable object and we shall enjoy it and
each other to all eternity 

she said her dear friend was so earnest for a line or two that she fain
would write if she could and she tried but to no purpose she could
dictate however she believed and desired mrs lovick would take pen
and paper which she did and then she dictated to her i would have
withdrawn but at her desire staid 

she wandered a good deal at first she took notice that she did and
when she got into a little train not pleasing herself she apologized to
mrs lovick for making her begin again and again and said that the
third time should go let it be as it would 

she dictated the farewell part without hesitation and when she came to
blessing and subscription she took the pen and dropping on her knees 
supported by mrs lovick wrote the conclusion but mrs lovick was
forced to guide her hand 

you will find the sense surprisingly entire her weakness considered 

i made the messenger wait while i transcribed it i have endeavoured to
imitate the subscriptive part and in the letter made pauses where to
the best of my remembrance she paused in nothing that relates to this
admirable lady can i be too minute 


wedn near three o'clock 


my dearest miss howe 

you must not be surprised nor grieved that mrs lovick writes for me 
although i cannot obey you and write with my pen yet my heart writes
by her's accept it so it is the nearest to obedience i can 

and now what ought i to say what can i say but why should not you
know the truth since soon you must very soon 

know then and let your tears be those if of pity of joyful pity for
i permit you to shed a few to embalm as i may say a fallen blossom 
know then that the good doctor and the pious clergyman and the worthy
apothecary have just now with joint benedictions taken their last
leave of me and the former bids me hope do my dearest let me say hope
 hope for my enlargement before to-morrow sun-set 

adieu therefore my dearest friend be this your consolation as it is
mine that in god's good time we shall meet in a blessed eternity never
more to part once more then adieu and be happy which a generous
nature cannot be unless to its power it makes others so too 

god for ever bless you prays dropt on my bended knees although
supported upon them 

your obliged grateful affectionate 
cl harlowe 


 


when i had transcribed and sealed this letter by her direction i gave
it to the messenger myself who told me that miss howe waited for nothing
but his return to set out for london 

thy servant is just come so i will close here thou art a merciless
master these two fellows are battered to death by thee to use a female
word and all female words though we are not sure of their derivation 
have very significant meanings i believe in their hearts they wish
the angel in the heaven that is ready to receive her and thee at the
proper place that there might be an end of their flurries another word
of the same gender 

what a letter hast thou sent me poor lovelace is all the answer i
will return 


five o'clock   col morden is this moment arrived 



letter lxxi

mr belford
 in continuation  
eight in the evening 


i had but just time in my former to tell you that col morden was
arrived he was on horseback attended by two servants and alighted
at the door just as the clock struck five mrs smith was then below in
her back-shop weeping her husband with her who was as much affected as
she mrs lovick having left them a little before in tears likewise for
they had been bemoaning one another joining in opinion that the
admirable lady would not live the night over she had told them it was
her opinion too from some numbnesses which she called the forerunners
of death and from an increased inclination to doze 

the colonel as mrs smith told me afterwards asked with great
impatience the moment he alighted how miss harlowe was she answered 
alive but she feared drawing on apace good god said he with his
hands and eyes lifted up can i see her my name is morden i have the
honour to be nearly related to her step up pray and let her know 
 she is sensible i hope that i am here who is with her 

nobody but her nurse and mrs lovick a widow gentlewoman who is as
careful of her as if she were her mother 

and more careful too interrupted he or she is not careful at all 

except a gentleman be with her one mr belford continued mrs smith 
who has been the best friend she has had 

if mr belford be with her surely i may but pray step up and let mr 
belford know that i shall take it for a favour to speak with him first 

mrs smith came up to me in my new apartment i had but just dispatched
your servant and was asking her nurse if i might be again admitted who
answered that she was dozing in the elbow chair having refused to lie
down saying she should soon she hoped lie down for good 

the colonel who is really a fine gentleman received me with great
politeness after the first compliments my kinswoman sir said he is
more obliged to you than to any of her own family for my part i have
been endeavouring to move so many rocks in her favour and little
thinking the dear creature so very bad have neglected to attend her as
i ought to have done the moment i arrived and would had i known how ill
she was and what a task i should have had with the family but sir 
your friend has been excessively to blame and you being so intimately
his friend has made her fare the worse for your civilities to her but
are there no hopes of her recovery 

the doctors have left her with the melancholy declaration that there are
none 

has she had good attendance sir a skilful physician i hear these
good folks have been very civil and obliging to her 

who could be otherwise said mrs smith weeping she is the sweetest
lady in the world 

the character said the colonel lifting up his eyes and one hand that
she has from every living creature good god how could your accursed
friend 

and how could her cruel parents interrupted i we may as easily account
for him as for them 

too true returned me the vileness of the profligates of our sex
considered whenever they can get any of the other into their power 

i satisfied him about the care that had been taken of her and told him
of the friendly and even paternal attendance she had had from dr h and
mr goddard 

he was impatient to attend her having not seen her as he said since
she was twelve years old and that then she gave promises of being one of
the finest women in england 

she was so replied i a very few months ago and though emaciated she
will appear to you to have confirmed those promises for her features are
so regular and exact her proportions so fine and her manner so
inimitably graceful that were she only skin and bone she must be a
beauty 

mrs smith at his request stept up and brought us down word that mrs 
lovick and her nurse were with her and that she was in so sound a sleep 
leaning upon the former in her elbow-chair that she had neither heard
her enter the room nor go out the colonel begged if not improper 
that he might see her though sleeping he said that his impatience
would not let him stay till he awaked yet he would not have her
disturbed and should be glad to contemplate her sweet features when she
saw not him and asked if she thought he could not go in and come out 
without disturbing her 

she believed he might she answered for her chair's back was towards the
door 

he said he would take care to withdraw if she awoke that his sudden
appearance might not surprise her 

mrs smith stepping up before us bid mrs lovick and nurse not stir 
when we entered and then we went up softly together 

we beheld the lady in a charming attitude dressed as i told you
before in her virgin white she was sitting in her elbow-chair mrs 
lovick close by her in another chair with her left arm round her neck 
supporting it as it were for it seems the lady had bid her do so 
saying she had been a mother to her and she would delight herself in
thinking she was in her mamma's arms for she found herself drowsy 
perhaps she said for the last time she should be so 

one faded cheek rested upon the good woman's bosom the kindly warmth of
which had overspread it with a faint but charming flush the other paler
and hollow as if already iced over by death her hands white as the
lily with her meandering veins more transparently blue than ever i had
seen even her's veins so soon alas to be choked up by the congealment
of that purple stream which already so languidly creeps rather than
flows through them her hands hanging lifelessly one before her the
other grasped by the right-hand of the kind widow whose tears bedewed
the sweet face which her motherly boson supported though unfelt by the
fair sleeper and either insensibly to the good woman or what she would
not disturb her to wipe off or to change her posture her aspect was
sweetly calm and serene and though she started now and then yet her
sleep seemed easy her breath indeed short and quick but tolerably
free and not like that of a dying person 

in this heart-moving attitude she appeared to us when we approached her 
and came to have her lovely face before us 

the colonel sighing often gazed upon her with his arms folded and with
the most profound and affectionate attention till at last on her
starting and fetching her breath with greater difficulty than before he
retired to a screen that was drawn before her house as she calls it 
which as i have heretofore observed stands under one of the windows 
this screen was placed there at the time she found herself obliged to
take to her chamber and in the depth of our concern and the fulness of
other discourse at our first interview i had forgotten to apprize the
colonel of what he would probably see 

retiring thither he drew out his handkerchief and overwhelmed with
grief seemed unable to speak but on casting his eye behind the screen 
he soon broke silence for struck with the shape of the coffin he
lifted up a purplish-coloured cloth that was spread over it and 
starting back good god said he what's here 

mrs smith standing next him why said he with great emotion is my
cousin suffered to indulge her sad reflections with such an object before
her 

alas sir replied the good woman who should controul her we are all
strangers about her in a manner and yet we have expostulated with her
upon this sad occasion 

i ought said i stepping softly up to him the lady again falling into
a doze to have apprized you of this i was here when it was brought
in and never was so shocked in my life but she had none of her friends
about her and no reason to hope for any of them to come near her and 
assured she should not recover she was resolved to leave as little as
possible especially as to what related to her person to her executor 
but it is not a shocking object to her though it be to every body else 

curse upon the hard-heartedness of those said he who occasioned her to
make so sad a provision for herself what must her reflections have been
all the time she was thinking of it and giving orders about it and
what must they be every time she turns her head towards it these
uncommon genius's but indeed she should have been controuled in it had
i been here 

the lady fetched a profound sigh and starting it broke off our talk 
and the colonel then withdrew farther behind the screen that his sudden
appearance might not surprise her 

where am i said she how drowsy i am how long have i dozed don't
go sir for i was retiring i am very stupid and shall be more and
more so i suppose 

she then offered to raise herself but being ready to faint through
weakness was forced to sit down again reclining her head on her chair
back and after a few moments i believe now my good friends said she 
all your kind trouble will soon be over i have slept but am not
refreshed and my fingers' ends seem numbed have no feeling holding
them up tis time to send the letter to my good norton 

shall i madam send my servant post with it 

o no sir i thank you it will reach the dear woman too soon as she
will think by the post 

i told her this was not post-day 

is it wednesday still said she bless me i know not how the time goes
 but very tediously tis plain and now i think i must soon take to my
bed all will be most conveniently and with least trouble over there 
will it not mrs lovick i think sir turning to me i have left
nothing to these last incapacitating hours nothing either to say or to
do i bless god i have not if i had how unhappy should i be can
you sir remind me of any thing necessary to be done or said to make
your office easy 

if madam your cousin morden should come you would be glad to see him 
i presume 

i am too weak to wish to see my cousin now it would but discompose me 
and him too yet if he come while i can see him i will see him were
it but to thank him for former favours and for his present kind
intentions to me has any body been here from him 

he has called and will be here madam in half an hour but he feared to
surprise you 

nothing can surprise me now except my mamma were to favour me with her
last blessing in person that would be a welcome surprise to me even
yet but did my cousin come purposely to town to see me 

yes madam i took the liberty to let him know by a line last monday 
how ill you were 

you are very kind sir i am and have been greatly obliged to you but
i think i shall be pained to see him now because he will be concerned to
see me and yet as i am not so ill as i shall presently be the sooner
he comes the better but if he come what shall i do about the screen 
he will chide me very probably and i cannot bear chiding now perhaps 
 leaning upon mrs lovick and mrs smith   i can walk into the next
apartment to receive him 

she motioned to rise but was ready to faint again and forced to sit
still 

the colonel was in a perfect agitation behind the screen to hear this
discourse and twice unseen by his cousin was coming from it towards
her but retreated for fear of surprising her too much 

i stept to him and favoured his retreat she only saying are you going 
mr belford are you sent for down is my cousin come for she heard
somebody step softly across the room and thought it to be me her
hearing being more perfect than her sight 

i told her i believed he was and she said we must make the best of it 
mrs lovick and mrs smith i shall otherwise most grievously shock my
poor cousin for he loved me dearly once pray give me a few of the
doctor's last drops in water to keep up my spirits for this one
interview and that is all i believe that can concern me now 

the colonel who heard all this sent in his name and i pretending to
go down to him introduced the afflicted gentleman she having first
ordered the screen to be put as close to the window as possible that he
might not see what was behind it while he having heard what she had
said about it was determined to take no notice of it 

he folded the angel in his arms as she sat dropping down on one knee 
for supporting herself upon the two elbows of the chair she attempted
to rise but could not excuse my dear cousin said she excuse me 
that i cannot stand up i did not expect this favour now but i am glad
of this opportunity to thank you for all your generous goodness to me 

i never my best-beloved and dearest cousin said he with eyes running
over shall forgive myself that i did not attend you sooner little
did i think you were so ill nor do any of your friends believe it if
they did 

if they did repeated she interrupting him i should have had more
compassion from them i am sure i should but pray sir how did you
leave them are you reconciled to them if you are not i beg if you
love your poor clarissa that you will for every widened difference
augments but my fault since that is the foundation of all 

i had been expecting to hear from them in your favour my dear cousin 
said he for some hours when this gentleman's letter arrived which
hastened me up but i have the account of your grandfather's estate to
make up with you and have bills and drafts upon their banker for the
sums due to you which they desire you may receive lest you should have
occasion for money and this is such an earnest of an approaching
reconciliation that i dare to answer for all the rest being according to
your wishes if 

ah sir interrupted she with frequent breaks and pauses i wish i wish
this does not rather show that were i to live they would have nothing
more to say to me i never had any pride in being independent of them 
all my actions when i might have made myself more independent show this
 but what avail these reflections now i only beg sir that you and
this gentleman to whom i am exceedingly obliged will adjust those
matters according to the will i have written mr belford will excuse
me but it was in truth more necessity than choice that made me think of
giving him the trouble he so kindly accepts had i the happiness to see
you my cousin sooner or to know that you still honoured me with your
regard i should not have had the assurance to ask this favour of him 
but though the friend of mr lovelace he is a man of honour and he
will make peace rather than break it and my dear cousin let me beg
of you while i have nearer relations than my cousin morden dear as you
are and always were to me you have no title to avenge my wrongs upon
him who has been the occasion of them but i wrote to you my mind on
this subject and my reasons and i hope i need not further urge them 

i must do mr lovelace so much justice answered he wiping his eyes as
to witness how sincerely he repents him of his ungrateful baseness to
you and how ready he is to make you all the amends in his power he
owns his wickedness and your merit if he did not i could not pass it
over though you have nearer relations for my dear cousin did not your
grandfather leave me in trust for you and should i think myself
concerned for your fortune and not for your honour but since he is so
desirous to do you justice i have the less to say and you may make
yourself entirely easy on that account 

i thank you thank you sir said she all is now as i wished but i am
very faint very weak i am sorry i cannot hold up that i cannot better
deserve the honour of this visit but it will not be and saying this she
sunk down in her chair and was silent 

hereupon we both withdrew leaving word that we would be at the bedford
head if any thing extraordinary happened 

we bespoke a little repast having neither of us dined and while it was
getting ready you may guess at the subject of our discourse both
joined in lamentation for the lady's desperate state admired her
manifold excellencies severely condemned you and her friends yet to
bring him into better opinion of you i read to him some passages from
your last letters which showed your concern for the wrongs you had done
her and your deep remorse and he said it was a dreadful thing to labour
under the sense of a guilt so irredeemable 

we procured mr goddard dr h not being at home once more to visit
her and to call upon us in his return he was so good as to do so but
he tarried with her not five minutes and told us that she was drawing
on apace that he feared she would not live till morning and that she
wished to see colonel morden directly 

the colonel made excuses where none were needed and though our little
refection was just brought in he went away immediately 

i could not touch a morsel and took pen and ink to amuse myself and
oblige you knowing how impatient you would be for a few lines for from
what i have recited you see it was impossible i could withdraw to write
when your servant came at half an hour after five or have an opportunity
for it till now and this is accidental and yet your poor fellow was
afraid to go away with the verbal message i sent importing as no doubt
he told you that the colonel was with us the lady excessively ill and
that i could not stir to write a line 


ten o'clock 

the colonel sent to me afterwards to tell me that the lady having been
in convulsions he was so much disordered that he could not possibly
attend me 

i have sent every half hour to know how she does and just now i have the
pleasure to hear that her convulsions have left her and that she is gone
to rest in a much quieter way than could be expected 

her poor cousin is very much indisposed yet will not stir out of the
house while she is in such a way but intends to lie down on a couch 
having refused any other accommodation 


contents of volume ix


letter i belford to lovelace 
her silent devotion strong symptoms of her approaching dissolution 
comforts her cousin and him wishes she had her parents' last blessing 
but god she says would not let her depend for comfort on any but
himself repeats her request to the colonel that he will not seek to
avenge her wrongs and to belford that he will endeavour to heal all
breaches 

letter ii from the same 
the colonel writes to mr john harlowe that they may now spare themselves
the trouble of debating about a reconciliation the lady takes from her
bosom a miniature picture of miss howe to be given to mr hickman after
her decease her affecting address to it on parting with it 

letter iii belford to mowbray 
desires him and tourville to throw themselves in the way of lovelace in
order to prevent him doing either mischief to himself or others on the
receipt of the fatal news which he shall probably send him in an hour or
two 

letter iv lovelace to belford 
a letter filled with rage curses and alternate despair and hope 

letter v belford to lovelace 
with the fatal hint that he may take a tour to paris or wherever else
his destiny shall lead him 

letter vi mowbray to belford 
with the particulars in his libertine manner of lovelace's behaviour
on his receiving the fatal breviate and of the distracted way he is in 

letter vii belford to lovelace 
particulars of clarissa's truly christian behaviour in her last hours a
short sketch of her character 

letter viii from the same 
the three next following letters brought by a servant in livery directed
to the departed lady viz 

letter ix from mrs norton 
with the news of a general reconciliation upon her own conditions 

letter x from miss arabella 
in which she assures her of all their returning love and favour 

letter xi from mr john harlowe 
regretting that things have been carried so far and desiring her to
excuse his part in what had passed 

letter xii belford to lovelace 
his executorial proceedings eleven posthumous letters of the lady 
copy of one of them written to himself tells lovelace of one written to
him in pursuance of her promise in her allegorical letter see letter
xviii of vol viii other executorial proceedings the colonel's
letter to james harlowe signifying clarissa's request to be buried at
the feet of her grandfather 

letter xiii from the same 
mrs norton arrives her surprise and grief to find her beloved young
lady departed the posthumous letters calculated to give comfort and
not to reproach 

letter xiv xv xvi xvii xviii 
copies of clarissa's posthumous letters to her father mother brother 
sister and uncle 

substance of her letter to her aunt hervey concluding with advice to her
cousin dolly 

substance of her letter to miss howe with advice in favour of mr 
hickman 

letter xix belford to lovelace 
the wretched sinclair breaks her leg and dispatches sally martin to beg
a visit from him and that he will procure for her the
forgiveness sally's remorse for the treatment she gave her at
rowland's acknowledges the lady's ruin to be in a great measure owing
to their instigations 

letter xx from the same 
miss howe's distress on receiving the fatal news and the posthumous
letters directed to her copy of james harlowe's answer to colonel
morden's letter in which he relates the unspeakable distress of the
family endeavours to exculpate himself desires the body may be sent
down to harlowe-place and that the colonel will favour them with his
company 

letter xxi belford to lovelace 
the corpse sent down attended by the colonel and mrs norton 

letter xxii mowbray to belford 
an account of lovelace's delirious unmanageableness and extravagant
design had they not all interposed they have got lord m to him he
endeavours to justify lovelace by rakish principles and by a true story
of a villany which he thinks greater than that of lovelace by clarissa 

letter xxiii lovelace to belford 
written in the height of his delirium the whole world he says is but
one great bedlam every one in it mad but himself 

letter xxiv belford to mowbray 
desires that lovelace on his recovery may be prevailed upon to go
abroad and why exhorts him and tourville to reform as he is resolved
to do 

letter xxv belford to lovelace 
describing the terrible impatience despondency and death of the
wretched sinclair 

 as the bad house is often mentioned in this work without any other
stigma than what arises from the wicked principles and actions
occasionally given of the wretches who inhabit it mr belford here
enters into the secret retirements of those creatures and exposes them
in the appearances they are supposed to make before they are tricked out
to ensnare weak and inconsiderate minds  

letter xxvi colonel morden to mr belford 
with an account of his arrival at harlowe-place before the body the
dreadful distress of the whole family in expectation of its coming the
deep remorse of james and arabella harlowe mutual recriminations on
recollecting the numerous instances of their inexorable cruelty mrs 
norton so ill he was forced to leave her at st alban's he dates again
to give a farther account of their distress on the arrival of the hearse 
solemn respect paid to her memory by crowds of people 

letter xxvii from the same 
farther interesting accounts of what passed among the harlowes miss
howe expected to see for the last time her beloved friend 

letter xxviii from the same 
miss howe arrives the colonel receives her her tender woe and
characteristic behaviour 

letter xxix colonel morden to mr belford 
mrs norton arrives amended in spirits to what owing farther
recriminations of the unhappy parents they attempt to see the corpse 
but cannot could ever wilful hard-heartedness the colonel asks be
more severely punished substance of the lady's posthumous letter to
mrs norton 

letter xxx from the same 
account of the funeral solemnity heads of the eulogium the universal
justice done to the lady's great and good qualities other affecting
particulars 

letter xxxi belford to colonel morden 
compliments him on his pathetic narratives farther account of his
executorial proceedings 

letter xxxii james harlowe to belford 

letter xxxiii mr belford in answer 

the lady's last will in the preamble to which as well as in the body
of it she gives several instructive hints and displays in an exemplary
manner her forgiving spirit her piety her charity her gratitude and
other christian and heroic virtues 

letter xxxiv colonel morden to mr belford 
the will read what passed on the occasion 

letter xxxv belford to lord m 
apprehends a vindictive resentment from the colonel desires that mr 
lovelace may be prevailed upon to take a tour 

letter xxxvi miss montague in answer 

summary account of proceedings relating to the execution of the lady's
will and other matters substance of a letter from mr belford to mr 
hickman of mr hickman's answer and of a letter from miss howe to mr 
belford 

letter xxxvii lovelace to belford 
describing his delirium as dawning into sense and recollection all is
conscience and horror with him he says a description of his misery at
its height 

letter xxxviii from the same 
revokes his last letter as ashamed of it yet breaks into fits and
starts and is ready to go back again why he asks did his mother
bring him up to know no controul his heart sickens at the recollection
of what he was dreads the return of his malady makes an effort to
forget all 

letter xxxix lovelace to belford 
is preparing to leave the kingdom his route seasonable warnings 
though delivered in a ludicrous manner on belford's resolution to
reform complains that he has been strangely kept in the dark of late 
demands a copy of the lady's will 

letter xl belford to lovelace 
justice likely to overtake his instrument tomlinson on what occasion 
the wretched man's remorse on the lady's account belford urges lovelace
to go abroad for his health answers very seriously to the warnings he
gives him amiable scheme for the conduct of his future life 

letter xli lovelace to belford 
pities tomlinson finds that he is dead in prison happy that he lived
not to be hanged why no discomfort so great but some comfort may be
drawn from it endeavours to defend himself by a whimsical case which
he puts between a a miser and b a thief 

letter xlii from the same 
ridicules him on the scheme of life he has drawn out for himself in his
manner gives belford some farther cautions and warnings reproaches him
for not saving the lady a breach of confidence in some cases is more
excusable than to keep a secret rallies him on his person and air on
his cousin charlotte and the widow lovick 

letter xliii mr belford to colonel morden 
on a declaration he had made of taking vengeance of mr lovelace his
arguments with him on that subject from various topics 

letter xliv the lady's posthumous letter to her cousin morden 
containing arguments against duelling as well as with regard to her
particular case as in general see also letter xvi to her brother on
the same subject 

letter xlv colonel morden to mr belford 
in answer to his pleas against avenging his cousin he paints in very
strong colours the grief and distress of the whole family on the loss of
a child whose character and excellencies rise upon them to their
torment 

letter xlvi colonel morden to mr belford 
farther particulars relating to the execution of the lady's will gives
his thoughts of women's friendships in general of that of miss howe and
his cousin in particular an early habit of familiar letter-writing 
how improving censures miss howe for her behaviour to mr hickman mr 
hickman's good character caution to parents who desire to preserve
their children's veneration for them mr hickman unknown to miss howe 
puts himself and equipage in mourning for clarissa her lively turn upon
him on that occasion what he the colonel expects from the generosity
of miss howe in relation to mr hickman weakness of such as are afraid
of making their last wills 

letter xlvii belford to miss howe 
with copies of clarissa's posthumous letters and respectfully as from
colonel morden and himself reminding her of her performing her part of
her dear friend's last desires in making one of the most deserving men
in england happy informs her of the delirium of lovelace in order to
move her compassion for him and of the dreadful death of sinclair and
tomlinson 

letter xlviii miss howe to mr belford 
observations on the letters and subjects he communicates to her she
promises another letter in answer to his and colonel morden's call upon
her in mr hickman's favour applauds the colonel for purchasing her
beloved friend's jewels in order to present them to miss dolly hervey 

letter xlix from the same 
she accounts for though not defends her treatment of mr hickman she
owns that he is a man worthy of a better choice that she values no man
more than him and assures mr belford and the colonel that her
endeavours shall not be wanting to make him happy 

letter l mr belford to miss howe 
a letter full of grateful acknowledgements for the favour of her's 

letter li lord m to mr belford 
acquainting him with his kinsman's setting out for london in order to
embark wishes him to prevent a meeting between him and mr morden 

letter lii mr belford to lord m 
has had a visit from mr lovelace what passed between them on the
occasion has an interview with colonel morden 

letter liii mr belford to lord m 
just returned from attending mr lovelace part of his way towards dover 
their solemn parting 

letter liv from the same 
an account of what passed between himself and colonel morden at their
next meeting their affectionate parting 

letter lv miss howe to mr belford 
gives at his request the character of her beloved friend at large and
an account of the particular distribution of her time in the twenty-four
hours of the natural day 

letter lvi lovelace to belford from paris 
conscience the conqueror of souls he cannot run away from his
reflections he desires a particular account of all that has passed
since he left england 

letter lvii belford to lovelace 
answers him as to all the particulars he writes about 

letter lviii lovelace to belford 
has received a letter from joseph leman who he says is
conscience-ridden to inform him that colonel morden resolves to have his
will of him he cannot bear to be threatened he will write to the
colonel to know his purpose he cannot get off his regrets on account of
the dear lady for the blood of him 

letter lix belford to lovelace 
it would be matter of serious reflection to him he says if that very
leman who had been his machine should be the instrument of his fall 

letter lx lovelace to belford 
has written to the colonel to know his intention but yet in such a
manner that he may handsomely avoid taking it as a challenge though in
the like case he owns that he himself should not copy of his letter to
the colonel 

letter lxi from the same 
he is now in his way to trent in order to meet colonel morden he is
sure of victory but will not if he can help it out of regard to
clarissa kill the colonel 

letter lxii from the same 
interview with colonel morden to-morrow says he is the day that will 
in all probability send either one or two ghosts to attend the manes of
my clarissa he doubts not to give the colonel his life or his death 
and to be able by next morning eleven to write all the particulars 

letter lxiv the issue of the duel 

conclusion

postscript



the history

of

clarissa harlowe



letter i

mr belford
 in continuation  
soho six o'clock sept 7 


the lady is still alive the colonel having just sent his servant to let
me know that she inquired after me about an hour ago i am dressing to
attend her joel begs of me to dispatch him back though but with one
line to gratify your present impatience he expects he says to find
you at knightsbridge let him make what haste he can back and if he has
not a line or two to pacify you he is afraid you will pistol him for he
apprehends that you are hardly yourself i therefore dispatch this and
will have another ready as soon as i can with particulars but you
must have a little patience for how can i withdraw myself every half
hour to write if i am admitted to the lady's presence or if i am with
the colonel 


smith's eight in the morning 

the lady is in a slumber mrs lovick who sat up with her says she had
a better night than was expected for although she slept little she
seemed easy and the easier for the pious frame she was in all her
waking moments being taken up in devotion or in an ejaculatory silence 
her hands and eyes often lifted up and her lips moving with a fervour
worthy of these her last hours 


ten o'clock 

the colonel being earnest to see his cousin as soon as she awoke we were
both admitted we observed in her as soon as we entered strong
symptoms of her approaching dissolution notwithstanding what the women
had flattered us with from her last night's tranquillity the colonel
and i each loth to say what we thought looked upon one another with
melancholy countenances 

the colonel told her he should send a servant to her uncle antony's for
some papers he had left there and asked if she had any commands that
way 

she thought not she said speaking more inwardly than she did the day
before she had indeed a letter ready to be sent to her good norton and
there was a request intimated in it but it was time enough if the
request were signified to those whom it concerned when all was over 
 however it might be sent them by the servant who was going that way 
and she caused it to be given to the colonel for that purpose 

her breath being very short she desired another pillow having two
before this made her in a manner sit up in her bed and she spoke then
with more distinctness and seeing us greatly concerned forgot her own
sufferings to comfort us and a charming lecture she gave us though a
brief one upon the happiness of a timely preparation and upon the
hazards of a late repentance when the mind as she observed was so much
weakened as well as the body as to render a poor soul hardly able to
contend with its natural infirmities 

i beseech ye my good friends proceeded she mourn not for one who
mourns not nor has cause to mourn for herself on the contrary 
rejoice with me that all my worldly troubles are so near to their end 
believe me sirs that i would not if i might choose to live although
the pleasantest part of my life were to come over again and yet eighteen
years of it out of nineteen have been very pleasant to be so much
exposed to temptation and to be so liable to fail in the trial who
would not rejoice that all her dangers are over all i wished was pardon
and blessing from my dear parents easy as my departure seems promised
to be it would have been still easier had i that pleasure but god
almighty would not let me depend for comfort upon any but himself 

she then repeated her request in the most earnest manner to her cousin 
that he would not heighten her fault by seeking to avenge her death to
me that i would endeavour to make up all breaches and use the power i
had with my friend to prevent all future mischiefs from him as well as
that which this trust might give me to prevent any to him 

she made some excuses to her cousin for not having been able to alter
her will to join him in the executorship with me and to me for the
trouble she had given and yet should give me 

she had fatigued herself so much growing sensibly weaker that she sunk
her head upon her pillows ready to faint and we withdrew to the window 
looking upon one another but could not tell what to say and yet both
seemed inclinable to speak but the motion passed over in silence our
eyes only spoke and that in a manner neither's were used to mine at
least not till i knew this admirable creature 

the colonel withdrew to dismiss his messenger and send away the letter
to mrs norton i took the opportunity to retire likewise and to write
thus far and joel returning to take it i now close here 

eleven o'clock 



letter ii

mr belford
 in continuation  


the colonel tells me that he had written to mr john harlowe by his
servant that they might spare themselves the trouble of debating about
a reconciliation for that his dear cousin would probably be no more
before they could resolve 

he asked me after his cousin's means of subsisting and whether she had
accepted of any favour from me he was sure he said she would not from
you 

i acquainted him with the truth of her parting with some of her apparel 

this wrung his heart and bitterly did he exclaim as well against you as
against her implacable relations 

he wished he had not come to england at all or had come sooner and
hoped i would apprize him of the whole mournful story at a proper
season he added that he had thoughts when he came over of fixing
here for the remainder of his days but now as it was impossible his
cousin could recover he would go abroad again and re-settle himself at
florence or leghorn 

the lady has been giving orders with great presence of mind about her
body directing her nurse and the maid of the house to put her in the
coffin as soon as she is cold mr belford she said would know the
rest by her will 


 


she has just now given from her bosom where she always wore it a
miniature picture set in gold of miss howe she gave it to mrs 
lovick desiring her to fold it up in white paper and direct it to
charles hickman esq and to give it to me when she was departed for
that gentleman 

she looked upon the picture before she gave it her sweet and
ever-amiable friend companion sister lover said she and kissed
it four several times once at each tender appellation 


 


your other servant is come well may you be impatient well may you 
 but do you think i can leave off in the middle of a conversation to
run and set down what offers and send it away piece-meal as i write 
 if i could must i not lose one half while i put down the other 

this event is nearly as interesting to me as it is to you if you are
more grieved than i there can be but one reason for it and that's at
your heart i had rather lose all the friends i have in the world 
 yourself in the number than this divine lady and shall be unhappy
whenever i think of her sufferings and of her merit though i have
nothing to reproach myself by reason of the former 

i say not this just now so much to reflect upon you as to express my
own grief though your conscience i suppose will make you think
otherwise 

your poor fellow who says that he begs for his life in desiring to be
dispatched back with a letter tears this from me else perhaps for
i am just sent for down a quarter of an hour would make you not easy
indeed but certain and that in a state like your's to a mind like
your's is a relief 

thursday afternoon four o'clock 



letter iii

mr belford to richard mowbray esq 
thursday afternoon 


dear mowbray 

i am glad to hear you are in town throw yourself the moment this comes
to your hand if possible with tourville in the way of the man who
least of all men deserves the love of the worthy heart but most that of
thine and tourville else the news i shall most probably send him within
an hour or two will make annihilation the greatest blessing he has to
wish for 

you will find him between piccadilly and kensington most probably on
horseback riding backwards and forwards in a crazy way or put up 
perhaps at some inn or tavern in the way a waiter possibly if so 
watching for his servant's return to him from me 


 


his man will is just come to me he will carry this to you in his way
back and be your director hie away in a coach or any how your being
with him may save either his or a servant's life see the blessed
effects of triumphant libertinism sooner or later it comes home to us 
and all concludes in gall and bitterness 

adieu 
j belford 



letter iv

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


curse upon the colonel and curse upon the writer of the last letter i
received and upon all the world thou to pretend to be as much
interested in my clarissa's fate as myself tis well for one of us that
this was not said to me instead of written living or dying she is
mine and only mine have i not earned her dearly is not d n n
likely to be the purchase to me though a happy eternity will be her's 

an eternal separation o god o god how can i bear that thought but
yet there is life yet therefore hope enlarge my hope and thou shalt
be my good genius and i will forgive thee every thing 

for this last time but it must not shall not be the last let me hear 
the moment thou receivest this what i am to be for at present i am

the most miserable of men 


rose at knightsbridge five o'clock 

my fellow tells me that thou art sending mowbray and tourville to me i
want them not my soul's sick of them and of all the world but most of
myself yet as they send me word they will come to me immediately i
will wait for them and for thy next o belford let it not be but
hasten it be what it may 



letter v

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
seven o'clock thursday evening sept 7 


i have only to say at present thou wilt do well to take a tour to
paris or wherever else thy destiny shall lead thee 

john belford 



letter vi

mr mowbray to john belford esq 
uxbridge sept 7 between eleven and twelve at night 


dear jack 

i send by poor lovelace's desire for particulars of the fatal breviate
thou sentest him this night he cannot bear to set pen to paper yet
wants to know every minute passage of miss harlowe's departure yet why
he should i cannot see for if she is gone she is gone and who can
help it 

i never heard of such a woman in my life what great matters has she
suffered that grief should kill her thus 

i wish the poor fellow had never known her from first to last what
trouble she has cost him the charming fellow had been half lost to us
ever since he pursued her and what is there in one woman more than
another for matter of that 

it was well we were with him when your note came your showed your true
friendship in your foresight why jack the poor fellow was quite
beside himself mad as any man ever was in bedlam 

will brought him the letter just after we had joined him at the bohemia
head where he had left word at the rose at knightsbridge he should be 
for he had been sauntering up and down backwards and forwards expecting
us and his fellow will as soon as he delivered it got out of his
way and when he opened it never was such a piece of scenery he
trembled like a devil at receiving it fumbled at the seal his fingers
in a palsy like tom doleman's his hand shake shake shake that he
tore the letter in two before he could come at the contents and when
he had read them off went his hat to one corner of the room his wig to
the other d n n seize the world and a whole volley of such-like
excratious wishes running up and down the room and throwing up the
sash and pulling it down and smiting his forehead with his double fist 
with such force as would have felled as ox and stamping and tearing 
that the landlord ran in and faster out again and this was the
distraction scene for some time 

in vain was all jemmy or i could say to him i offered once to take hold
of his hands because he was going to do himself a mischief as i
believed looking about for his pistols which he had laid upon the
table but which will unseen had taken out with him  a faithful 
honest dog that will i shall for ever love the fellow for it   and he
hit me a d d dowse of the chops as made my nose bleed twas well
twas he for i hardly knew how to take it 

jemmy raved at him and told him how wicked it was in him to be so
brutish to abuse a friend and run mad for a woman and then he said he
was sorry for it and then will ventured in with water and a towel and
the dog rejoiced as i could see by his look that i had it rather than
he 

and so by degrees we brought him a little to his reason and he
promised to behave more like a man and so i forgave him and we rode on
in the dark to here at doleman's and we all tried to shame him out of
his mad ungovernable foolishness for we told him as how she was but a
woman and an obstinate perverse woman too and how could he help it 

and you know jack as we told him moreover that it was a shame to
manhood for a man who had served twenty and twenty women as bad or
worse let him have served miss harlowe never so bad should give himself
such obstropulous airs because she would die and we advised him never
to attempt a woman proud of her character and virtue as they call it 
any more for why the conquest did not pay trouble and what was there
in one woman more than another hay you know jack and thus we
comforted him and advised him 

but yet his d d addled pate runs upon this lady as much now she's dead
as it did when she was living for i suppose jack it is no joke she
is certainly and bona fide dead i'n't she if not thou deservest to be
doubly d d for thy fooling i tell thee that so he will have me write
for particulars of her departure 

he won't bear the word dead on any account a squeamish puppy how love
unmans and softens and such a noble fellow as this too rot him for an
idiot and an oaf i have no patience with the foolish duncical dog
 upon my soul i have not 

so send the account and let him howl over it as i suppose he will 

but he must and shall go abroad and in a month or two jemmy and you 
and i will join him and he'll soon get the better of this
chicken-hearted folly never fear and will then be ashamed of himself 
and then we'll not spare him though now poor fellow it were pity to
lay him on so thick as he deserves and do thou till then spare all
reflections upon him for it seems thou hast worked him unmercifully 

i was willing to give thee some account of the hand we have had with the
tearing fellow who had certainly been a lost man had we not been with
him or he would have killed somebody or other i have no doubt of it 
and now he is but very middling sits grinning like a man in straw 
curses and swears and is confounded gloomy and creeps into holes and
corners like an old hedge-hog hunted for his grease 

and so adieu jack tourville and all of us wish for thee for no one
has the influence upon him that thou hast 

r mowbray 


as i promised him that i would write for the particulars abovesaid i
 write this after all are gone to bed and the fellow is set out
 with it by day-break 



letter vii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
thursday night 


i may as well try to write since were i to go to bed i shall not
sleep i never had such a weight of grief upon my mind in my life as
upon the demise of this admirable woman whose soul is now rejoicing
in the regions of light 

you may be glad to know the particulars of her happy exit i will try
to proceed for all is hush and still the family retired but not one
of them and least of all her poor cousin i dare say to rest 

at four o'clock as i mentioned in my last i was sent for down and 
as thou usedst to like my descriptions i will give thee the woeful scene
that presented itself to me as i approached the bed 

the colonel was the first that took my attention kneeling on the side of
the bed the lady's right hand in both his which his face covered 
bathing it with his tears although she had been comforting him as the
women since told me in elevated strains but broken accents 

on the other side of the bed sat the good widow her face overwhelmed
with tears leaning her head against the bed's head in a most
disconsolate manner and turning her face to me as soon as she saw me 
o mr belford cried she with folded hands the dear lady a heavy sob
permitted her not to say more 

mrs smith with clasped fingers and uplifted eyes as if imploring help
from the only power which could give it was kneeling down at the bed's
feet tears in large drops trickling down her cheeks 

her nurse was kneeling between the widow and mrs smith her arms
extended in one hand she held an ineffectual cordial which she had
just been offering to her dying mistress her face was swoln with weeping
 though used to such scenes as this and she turned her eyes towards me 
as if she called upon me by them to join in the helpless sorrow a fresh
stream bursting from them as i approached the bed 

the maid of the house with her face upon her folded arms as she stood
leaning against the wainscot more audibly exprest her grief than any of
the others 

the lady had been silent a few minutes and speechless as they thought 
moving her lips without uttering a word one hand as i said in her
cousin's but when mrs lovick on my approach pronounced my name o
mr belford said she with a faint inward voice but very distinct
nevertheless now now  in broken periods she spoke  i bless god for
his mercies to his poor creature all will soon be over a few a very
few moments will end this strife and i shall be happy 

comfort here sir turning her head to the colonel comfort my cousin
 see the blame able kindness he would not wish me to be happy
 so soon 

here she stopt for two or three minutes earnestly looking upon him 
then resuming my dearest cousin said she be comforted what is dying
but the common lot the mortal frame may seem to labour but that is
all it is not so hard to die as i believed it to be the preparation
is the difficulty i bless god i have had time for that the rest is
worse to beholders than to me i am all blessed hope hope itself she
looked what she said a sweet smile beaming over her countenance 

after a short silence once more my dear cousin said she but still in
broken accents commend me most dutifully to my father and mother there
she stopt and then proceeding to my sister to my brother to my
uncles and tell them i bless them with my parting breath for all their
goodness to me even for their displeasure i bless them most happy has
been to me my punishment here happy indeed 

she was silent for a few moments lifting up her eyes and the hand her
cousin held not between his then o death said she where is thy
sting  the words i remember to have heard in the burial-service read
over my uncle and poor belton   and after a pause it is good for me
that i was afflicted words of scripture i suppose 

then turning towards us who were lost in speechless sorrow o dear dear
gentlemen said she you know not what foretastes what assurances and
there she again stopped and looked up as if in a thankful rapture 
sweetly smiling 

then turning her head towards me do you sir tell your friend that i
forgive him and i pray to god to forgive him again pausing and
lifting up her eyes as if praying that he would let him know how
happily i die and that such as my own i wish to be his last hour 

she was again silent for a few moments and then resuming my sight
fails me your voices only  for we both applauded her christian her
divine frame though in accents as broken as her own  and the voice of
grief is alike in all is not this mr morden's hand pressing one of
his with that he had just let go which is mr belford's holding out
the other i gave her mine god almighty bless you both said she and
make you both in your last hour for you must come to this happy as i
am 

she paused again her breath growing shorter and after a few minutes
 and now my dearest cousin give me your hand nearer still nearer
 drawing it towards her and she pressed it with her dying lips god
protect you dear dear sir and once more receive my best and most
grateful thanks and tell my dear miss howe and vouchsafe to see and to
tell my worthy norton she will be one day i fear not though now lowly
in her fortunes a saint in heaven tell them both that i remember them
with thankful blessings in my last moments and pray god to give them
happiness here for many many years for the sake of their friends and
lovers and an heavenly crown hereafter and such assurances of it as i
have through the all-satisfying merits of my blessed redeemer 

her sweet voice and broken periods methinks still fill my ears and never
will be out of my memory 

after a short silence in a more broken and faint accent and you mr 
belford pressing my hand may god preserve you and make you sensible of
all your errors you see in me how all ends may you be and down sunk
her head upon her pillow she fainting away and drawing from us her
hands 

we thought she was then gone and each gave way to a violent burst of
grief 

but soon showing signs of returning life our attention was again
engaged and i besought her when a little recovered to complete in my
favour her half-pronounced blessing she waved her hand to us both and
bowed her head six several times as we have since recollected as if
distinguishing every person present not forgetting the nurse and the
maid-servant the latter having approached the bed weeping as if
crowding in for the divine lady's blessing and she spoke faltering and
inwardly bless bless bless you all and now and now  holding up
her almost lifeless hands for the last time  come o come blessed lord
 jesus 

and with these words the last but half-pronounced expired such a
smile such a charming serenity overspreading her sweet face at the
instant as seemed to manifest her eternal happiness already begun 

o lovelace but i can write no more 


 


i resume my pen to add a few lines 

while warm though pulseless we pressed each her hand with our lips 
and then retired into the next room 

we looked at each other with intent to speak but as if one motion
governed as one cause affected both we turned away silent 

the colonel sighed as if his heart would burst at last his face and
hands uplifted his back towards me good heaven said he to himself 
support me and is it thus o flower of nature then pausing and must
we no more never more my blessed blessed cousin uttering some other
words which his sighs made inarticulate and then as if recollecting
himself forgive me sir excuse me mr belford and sliding by me 
anon i hope to see you sir and down stairs he went and out of the
house leaving me a statue 

when i recovered i was ready to repine at what i then called an unequal
dispensation forgetting her happy preparation and still happier
departure and that she had but drawn a common lot triumphing in it and
leaving behind her every one less assured of happiness though equally
certain that the lot would one day be their own 

she departed exactly at forty minutes after six o'clock as by her watch
on the table 

and thus died miss clarissa harlowe in the blossom of her youth and
beauty and who her tender years considered had not left behind her her
superior in extensive knowledge and watchful prudence nor hardly her
equal for unblemished virtue exemplary piety sweetness of manners 
discreet generosity and true christian charity and these all set off by
the most graceful modesty and humility yet on all proper occasions 
manifesting a noble presence of mind and true magnanimity so that she
may be said to have been not only an ornament to her sex but to human
nature 

a better pen than mine may do her fuller justice thine i mean o
lovelace for well dost thou know how much she excelled in the graces of
both mind and person natural and acquired all that is woman and thou
also can best account for the causes of her immature death through those
calamities which in so short a space of time from the highest pitch of
felicity every one in a manner adoring her brought he to an exit so
happy for herself but that it was so early so much to be deplored by
all who had the honour of her acquaintance 

this task then i leave to thee but now i can write no more only that
i am a sympathizer in every part of thy distress except and yet it is
cruel to say it in that which arises from thy guilt 

one o'clock friday morning 



letter viii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
nine friday morn 


i have no opportunity to write at length having necessary orders to give
on the melancholy occasion joel who got to me by six in the morning 
and whom i dispatched instantly back with the letter i had ready from
last night gives me but an indifferent account of the state of your
mind i wonder not at it but time and nothing else can will make it
easier to you if that is to say you have compounded with your
conscience else it may be heavier every day than other 


 


tourville tells us what a way you are in i hope you will not think of
coming hither the lady in her will desires you may not see her four
copies are making of it it is a long one for she gives her reasons for
all she wills i will write to you more particularly as soon as possibly
i can 


 


three letters are just brought by a servant in livery directed to miss
clarissa harlowe i will send copies of them to you the contents are
enough to make one mad how would this poor lady have rejoiced to
receive them and yet if she had she would not have been enabled to
say as she nobly did that god would not let her depend for comfort
upon any but himself and indeed for some days past she had seemed to
have got above all worldly considerations her fervent love even for
her miss howe as she acknowledged having given way to supremer
fervours 


 see letter i of this volume 
 see vol viii letter lxii 



letter ix

mrs norton to miss clarissa harlowe
wednesday sept 6 


at length my best beloved miss clary every thing is in the wished
train for all your relations are unanimous in your favour even your
brother and your sister are with the foremost to be reconciled to you 

i knew it must end thus by patience and persevering sweetness what a
triumph have you gained 

this happy change is owing to letters received from your physician from
your cousin morden and from mr brand 

colonel morden will be with you no doubt before this can reach you 
with his pocket-book filled with money-bills that nothing may be wanting
to make you easy 

and now all our hopes all our prayers are that this good news may
restore you to spirits and health and that so long withheld it may not
come too late 

i know how much your dutiful heart will be raised with the joyful tidings
i write you and still shall more particularly tell you of when i have
the happiness to see you which will be by next sunday at farthest 
perhaps on friday afternoon by the time you can receive this 

for this day being sent for by the general voice i was received by
every one with great goodness and condescension and entreated for that
was the word they were pleased to use when i needed no entreaty i am
sure to hasten up to you and to assure you of all their affectionate
regards to you and your father bid me say all the kind things that were
in my heart to say in order to comfort and raise you up and they would
hold themselves bound to make them good 

how agreeable is this commission to your norton my heart will overflow
with kind speeches never fear i am already meditating what i shall
say to cheer and raise you up in the names of every one dear and near
to you and sorry i am that i cannot this moment set out as i might 
instead of writing would they favour my eager impatience with their
chariot but as it was not offered it would be a presumption to have
asked for it and to-morrow a hired chaise and pair will be ready but at
what hour i know not 

how i long once more to fold my dear precious young lady to my fond my
more than fond my maternal bosom 

your sister will write to you and send her letter with this by a
particular hand 

i must not let them see what i write because of my wish about the
chariot 

your uncle harlowe will also write and i doubt not in the kindest
terms for they are all extremely alarmed and troubled at the dangerous
way your doctor represents you to be in as well as delighted with the
character he gives you would to heaven the good gentleman had written
sooner and yet he writes that you know not he has now written but it
is all our confidence and our consolation that he would not have
written at all had he thought it too late 

they will prescribe no conditions to you my dear young lady but will
leave all to your own duty and discretion only your brother and sister
declare they will never yield to call mr lovelace brother nor will your
father i believe be easily brought to think of him for a son 

i am to bring you down with me as soon as your health and inclination
will permit you will be received with open arms every one longs to
see you all the servants please themselves that they shall be permitted
to kiss your hands the pert betty's note is already changed and she
now runs over in your just praises what friends does prosperity make 
what enemies adversity it always was and always will be so in every
state of life from the throne to the cottage but let all be forgotten
now on this jubilee change and may you my dearest miss be capable of
rejoicing in this good news as i know you will rejoice if capable of
any thing 

god preserve you to our happy meeting and i will if i may say so 
weary heaven with my incessant prayers to preserve and restore you
afterwards 

i need not say how much i am my dear young lady 
your ever-affectionate and devoted 
judith norton 


an unhappy delay as to the chaise will make it saturday morning before
 i can fold you to my fond heart 



letter x

miss arab harlowe to miss cl harlowe
wedn morn sept 6 


dear sister 

we have just heard that you are exceedingly ill we all loved you as
never young creature was loved you are sensible of that sister clary 
and you have been very naughty but we could not be angry always 

we are indeed more afflicted with the news of your being so very ill than
i can express for i see not but after this separation as we
understand that your misfortune has been greater than your fault and
that however unhappy you have demeaned yourself like the good young
creature you used to be we shall love you better if possible than
ever 

take comfort therefore sister clary and don't be too much cast down
 whatever your mortifications may be from such noble prospects
over-clouded and from the reflections you will have from within on your
faulty step and from the sullying of such a charming character by it 
you will receive none from any of us and as an earnest of your papa's
and mamma's favour and reconciliation they assure you by me of their
blessing and hourly prayers 

if it will be any comfort to you and my mother finds this letter is
received as we expect which we shall know by the good effect it will
have upon your health she will herself go to town to you mean-time 
the good woman you so dearly love will be hastened up to you and she
writes by this opportunity to acquaint you of it and of all our
returning love 

i hope you will rejoice at this good news pray let us hear that you do 
your next grateful letter on this occasion especially if it gives us the
pleasure of hearing you are better upon this news will be received with
the same if not greater delight than we used to have in all your
prettily-penn'd epistles adieu my dear clary i am 

your loving sister and true friend 
arabella harlowe 



letter xi

to his dear niece miss clarissa harlowe
wednesday sept 6 


we were greatly grieved my beloved miss clary at your fault but we are
still more if possible to hear you are so very ill and we are sorry
things have been carried so far we know your talents my dear and how
movingly you could write whenever you pleased so that nobody could ever
deny you any thing and believing you depended on your pen and little
thinking you were so ill and that you lived so regular a life and are
so truly penitent are must troubled every one of us your brother and
all for being so severe forgive my part in it my dearest clary i
am your second papa you know and you used to love me 

i hope you'll soon be able to come down and after a while when your
indulgent parents can spare you that you will come to me for a whole
month and rejoice my heart as you used to do but if through illness 
you cannot so soon come down as we wish i will go up to you for i long
to see you i never more longed to see you in my life and you was
always the darling of my heart you know 

my brother antony desires his hearty commendations to you and joins with
me in the tenderest assurance that all shall be well and if possible 
better than ever for we now have been so long without you that we know
the miss of you and even hunger and thirst as i may say to see you 
and to take you once more to our hearts whence indeed you was never
banished so far as our concern for the unhappy step made us think and you
believe you were your sister and brother both talk of seeing you in
town so does my dear sister your indulgent mother 

god restore your health if it be his will else i know not what will
become of

your truly loving uncle and second papa 
john harlowe 



letter xii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
friday night sept 8 past ten 


i will now take up the account of our proceedings from my letter of last
night which contained the dying words of this incomparable lady 

as soon as we had seen the last scene closed so blessedly for herself 
we left the body to the care of the good women who according to the
orders she had given them that very night removed her into that last
house which she had displayed so much fortitude in providing 

in the morning between seven and eight o'clock according to
appointment the colonel came to me here he was very much indisposed 
we went together accompanied by mrs lovick and mrs smith into the
deceased's chamber we could not help taking a view of the lovely
corpse and admiring the charming serenity of her noble aspect the
women declared they never say death so lovely before and that she looked
as if in an easy slumber the colour having not quite left her cheeks and
lips 

i unlocked the drawer in which as i mentioned in a former she had
deposited her papers i told you in mine of monday last that she had
the night before sealed up with three black seals a parcel inscribed 
as soon as i am certainly dead this to be broke open by mr belford i
accused myself for not having done it over-night but really i was then
incapable of any thing 


 see vol viii letter lvii 


i broke it open accordingly and found in it no less than eleven letters 
each sealed with her own seal and black wax one of which was directed
to me 

i will enclose a copy of it 


to john belford esq 
sunday evening sept 3 


sir 

i take this last and solemn occasion to repeat to you my thanks for all
your kindness to me at a time when i most needed countenance and
protection 

a few considerations i beg leave as now at your perusal of this from
the dead to press upon you with all the warmth of a sincere friendship 

by the time you will see this you will have had an instance i humbly
trust of the comfortable importance of a pacified conscience in the
last hours of one who to the last hour will wish your eternal welfare 

the great duke of luxemburgh as i have heard on his death-bed 
declared that he would then much rather have had it to reflect upon 
that he had administered a cup of cold water to a worthy poor creature in
distress than that he had won so many battles as he had triumphed for 
and as one well observes all the sentiments of worldly grandeur vanish
at that unavoidable moment which decides the destiny of men 

if then sir at the tremendous hour it be thus with the conquerors of
armies and the subduers of nations let me in a very few words many are
not needed ask what at that period must be the reflection of those 
 if capable of reflection who have lived a life of sense and offence 
whose study and whose pride most ingloriously have been to seduce the
innocent and to ruin the weak the unguarded and the friendless made
still more friendless by their base seductions o mr belford weigh 
ponder and reflect upon it now that in health and in vigour of mind
and body the reflections will most avail you what an ungrateful what
an unmanly what a meaner than reptile pride is this 

in the next place sir let me beg of you for my sake who am or as
now you will best read it have been driven to the necessity of applying
to you to be the executor of my will that you will bear according to
that generosity which i think to be in you with all my friends and
particularly with my brother who is really a worthy young man but
perhaps a little too headstrong in his first resentments and conceptions
of things if any thing by reason of this trust should fall out
disagreeably and that you will study to make peace and to reconcile all
parties and more especially that you who seem to have a great
influence upon your still-more headstrong friend will interpose if
occasion be to prevent farther mischief for surely sir that violent
spirit may sit down satisfied with the evils he has already wrought and 
particularly with the wrongs the heinous and ignoble wrongs he has in
me done to my family wounded in the tenderest part of its honour 

for your compliance with this request i have already your repeated
promise i claim the observance of it therefore as a debt from you 
and though i hope i need not doubt it yet was i willing on this solemn 
this last occasion thus earnestly to re-inforce it 

i have another request to make to you it is only that you will be
pleased by a particular messenger to forward the enclosed letters as
directed 

and now sir having the presumption to think that an useful member is
lost to society by means of the unhappy step which has brought my life so
soon to its period let me hope that i may be an humble instrument in
the hands of providence to reform a man of your abilities and then i
shall think that loss will be more abundantly repaired to the world 
while it will be by god's goodness my gain and i shall have this
farther hope that once more i shall have an opportunity in a blessed
eternity to thank you as i now repeatedly do for the good you have done
to and the trouble you will have taken for sir 

your obliged servant 
clarissa harlowe 


 


the other letters are directed to her father to her mother one to her
two uncles to her brother to her sister to her aunt hervey to her
cousin morden to miss howe to mrs norton and lastly one to you in
performance of her promise that a letter should be sent you when she
arrived at her father's house i will withhold this last till i can
be assured that you will be fitter to receive it than tourville tells me
you are at present 

copies of all these are sealed up and entitled copies of my ten
posthumous letters for j belford esq and put in among the bundle of
papers left to my direction which i have not yet had leisure to open 

no wonder while able that she was always writing since thus only of
late could she employ that time which heretofore from the long days she
made caused so many beautiful works to spring from her fingers it is
my opinion that there never was a woman so young who wrote so much and
with such celerity her thoughts keeping pace as i have seen with her
pen she hardly ever stopped or hesitated and very seldom blotted out 
or altered it was a natural talent she was mistress of among many
other extraordinary ones i gave the colonel his letter and ordered
harry instantly to get ready to carry the others mean time retiring
into the next apartment we opened the will we were both so much
affected in perusing it that at one time the colonel breaking off gave
it to me to read on at another i gave it back to him to proceed with 
neither of us being able to read it through without such tokens of
sensibility as affected the voice of each 

mrs lovick mrs smith and her nurse were still more touched when we
read those articles in which they are respectively remembered but i will
avoid mentioning the particulars except in what relates to the thread
of my narration as in proper time i shall send you a copy of it 

the colonel told me he was ready to account with me for the money and
bills brought up from harlowe-place which would enable me as he said 
directly to execute the legacy parts of the will and he would needs at
the instant force into my hands a paper relating to that subject i put
it into my pocket-book without looking into it telling him that as i
hoped he would do all in his power to promote a literal performance of
the will i must beg his advice and assistance in the execution of it 

her request to be buried with her ancestors made a letter of the
following import necessary which i prevailed upon the colonel to write 
being unwilling myself so early at least to appear officious in the
eye of a family which probably wishes not any communication with me 


to james harlowe jun esq 


sir 

the letter which the bearer of this brings with him will i presume 
make it unnecessary to acquaint you and my cousins with the death of the
most excellent of women but i am requested by her executor who will
soon send you a copy of her last will to acquaint her father which i
choose to do by your means that in it she earnestly desires to be laid
in the family-vault at the feet of her grandfather 

if her father will not admit of it she has directed her body to be
buried in the church-yard of the parish where she died 

i need not tell you that a speedy answer to this is necessary 

her beatification commenced yesterday afternoon exactly at forty minutes
after six 

i can write no more than that i am

your's etc 
wm morden 

friday morn sept 8 


by the time this was written and by the colonel's leave transcribed 
harry was booted and spurred his horse at the door and i delivered him
the letters to the family with those to mrs norton and miss howe 
 eight in all together with the above of the colonel to mr james
harlowe and gave him orders to use the utmost dispatch with them 

the colonel and i have bespoke mourning for our selves and servants 



letter xiii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
sat ten o'clock 


poor mrs norton is come she was set down at the door and would have
gone up stairs directly but mrs smith and mrs lovick being together
and in tears and the former hinting too suddenly to the truly-venerable
woman the fatal news she sunk down at her feet in fits so that they
were forced to breath a vein to bring her to herself and to a capacity
of exclamation and then she ran on to mrs lovick and me who entered
just as she recovered in praise of the lady in lamentations for her 
and invectives against you but yet so circumscribed were her invectives 
that i could observe in them the woman well educated and in her
lamentations the passion christianized as i may say 

she was impatient to see the corpse the women went up with her but
they owned that they were too much affected themselves on this occasion
to describe her extremely-affecting behaviour 

with trembling impatience she pushed aside the coffin-lid she bathed
the face with her tears and kissed her cheeks and forehead as if she
were living it was she indeed she said her sweet young lady her very
self nor had death which changed all things a power to alter her
lovely features she admired the serenity of her aspect she no doubt
was happy she said as she had written to her she should be but how
many miserable creatures had she left behind her the good woman
lamenting that she herself had lived to be one of them 

it was with difficulty they prevailed upon her to quit the corpse and
when they went into the next apartment i joined them and acquainted her
with the kind legacy her beloved young lady had left her but this rather
augmented than diminished her concern she ought she said to have
attended her in person what was the world to her wringing her hands 
now the child of her bosom and of her heart was no more her principal
consolation however was that she should not long survive her she
hoped she said that she did not sin in wishing she might not 

it was easy to observe by the similitude of sentiments shown in this and
other particulars that the divine lady owed to this excellent woman many
of her good notions 

i thought it would divert the poor gentlewoman and not altogether
unsuitably if i were to put her upon furnishing mourning for herself as
it would rouse her by a seasonable and necessary employment from that
dismal lethargy of grief which generally succeeds to the violent anguish
with which a gentle nature is accustomed to be torn upon the first
communication of the unexpected loss of a dear friend i gave her
therefore the thirty guineas bequeathed to her and to her son for
mourning the only mourning which the testatrix has mentioned and
desired her to lose no time in preparing her own as i doubted not that
she would accompany the corpse if it were permitted to be carried down 

the colonel proposes to attend the hearse if his kindred give him not
fresh cause of displeasure and will take with him a copy of the will 
and being intent to give the family some favourable impressions of me he
desired me to permit him to take with him the copy of the posthumous
letter to me which i readily granted he is so kind as to promise me a
minute account of all that should pass on the melancholy occasion and
we have begun a friendship and settled a correspondence which but one
incident can possibly happen to interrupt to the end of our lives and
that i hope will not happen 

but what must be the grief the remorse that will seize upon the hearts
of this hitherto-inexorable family on the receiving of the posthumous
letters and that of the colonel apprizing them of what has happened i
have given requisite orders to an undertaker on the supposition that the
body will be permitted to be carried down and the women intend to fill
the coffin with aromatic herbs 

the colonel has obliged me to take the bills and draughts which he
brought up with him for the considerable sums which accrued since the
grandfather's death from the lady's estate 

i could have shown to mrs norton the copies of the two letters which she
missed by coming up but her grief wants not the heightenings which the
reading of them would have given her 


 


i have been dipping into the copies of the posthumous letters to the
family which harry has carried down well may i call this lady divine 
they are all calculated to give comfort rather than reproach though
their cruelty to her merited nothing but reproach but were i in any of
their places how much rather had i that she had quitted scores with me
by the most severe recrimination than that she should thus nobly triumph
over me by a generosity that has no example i will enclose some of
them which i desire you to return as soon as you can 



letter xiv

to the ever-honoured jas harlowe sen esq 


most dear sir 

with exulting confidence now does your emboldened daughter come into your
awful presence by these lines who dared not but upon this occasion to
look up to you with hopes of favour and forgiveness since when this
comes to your hands it will be out of her power ever to offend you more 

and now let me bless you my honoured papa and bless you as i write 
upon my knees for all the benefits i have received from your indulgence 
for your fond love to me in the days of my prattling innocence for the
virtuous education you gave me and for the crown of all the happy end 
which through divine grace by means of that virtuous education i hope 
by the time you will receive this i shall have made and let me beg of
you dear venerable sir to blot out from your remembrance if possible 
the last unhappy eight months and then i shall hope to be remembered
with advantage for the pleasure you had the goodness to take in your
clarissa 

still on her knees let your poor penitent implore your forgiveness of
all her faults and follies more especially of that fatal error which
threw her out of your protection 

when you know sir that i have never been faulty in my will that ever
since my calamity became irretrievable i have been in a state of
preparation that i have the strongest assurance that the almighty has
accepted my unfeigned repentance and that by this time you will as i
humbly presume to hope have been the means of adding one to the number
of the blessed you will have reason for joy rather than sorrow since 
had i escaped the snares by which i was entangled i might have wanted
those exercises which i look upon now as so many mercies dispensed to
wean me betimes from a world that presented itself to me with prospects
too alluring and in that case too easily satisfied with the worldly
felicity i might not have attained to that blessedness in which now 
on your reading of this i humbly presume through the divine goodness 
i am rejoicing 

that the almighty in his own good time will bring you sir and my
ever-honoured mother after a series of earthly felicities of which my
unhappy fault be the only interruption and very grievous i know that
must have been to rejoice in the same blessed state is the repeated
prayer of sir 

your now happy daughter 
clarissa harlowe 



letter xv

to the ever-honoured mrs harlowe


honoured madam 

the last time i had the boldness to write to you it was with all the
consciousness of a self-convicted criminal supplicating her offended
judge for mercy and pardon i now by these lines approach you with
more assurance but nevertheless with the highest degree of reverence 
gratitude and duty the reason of my assurance my letter to my papa
will give and as i humbly on my knees implored his pardon so now in
the same dutiful manner do i supplicate your's for the grief and
trouble i have given you 

every vein of my heart has bled for an unhappy rashness which although
involuntary as to the act from the moment it was committed carried
with it its own punishment and was accompanied with a true and sincere
penitence 

god who has been a witness of my distresses knows that great as they
have been the greatest of all was the distress that i knew i must have
given to you madam and to my father by a step that had so very ugly an
appearance in your eyes and his and indeed in the eyes of all my family 
a step so unworthy of your daughter and of the education you had given
her 

but he i presume to hope has forgiven me and at the instant this will
reach your hands i humbly trust i shall be rejoicing in the blessed
fruits of his forgiveness and be this your comfort my ever-honoured
mamma that the principal end of your pious care for me is attained 
though not in the way so much hoped for 

may the grief which my fatal error has given to you both be the only
grief that shall ever annoy you in this world may you madam long live
to sweeten the cares and heighten the comforts of my papa may my
sister's continued and if possible augmented duty happily make up to
you the loss you have sustained in me and whenever my brother and she
change their single state may it be with such satisfaction to you both
as may make you forget my offence and remember me only in those days in
which you took pleasure in me and at last may a happy meeting with
your forgiven penitent in the eternal mansions augment the bliss of
her who purified by sufferings already when this salutes your hands 
presumes she shall be

the happy and for ever happy
clarissa harlowe 



letter xvi

to james harlowe jun esq 


sir 

there was but one time but one occasion after the rash step i was
precipitated upon that i would hope to be excused looking up to you
in the character of a brother and friend and now is that time and
this the occasion now at reading this will you pity your late unhappy
sister now will you forgive her faults both supposed and real and
now will you afford to her memory that kind concern which you refused to
her before 

i write my brother in the first place to beg your pardon for the
offence my unhappy step gave to you and to the rest of a family so dear
to me 

virgin purity should not so behave as to be suspected yet when you come
to know all my story you will find farther room for pity if not more
than pity for your late unhappy sister 

o that passion had not been deaf that misconception would have given
way to inquiry that your rigorous heart if it could not itself be
softened moderating the power you had obtained over every one had
permitted other hearts more indulgently to expand 

but i write not to give pain i had rather you should think me faulty
still than take to yourself the consequence that will follow from
acquitting me 

abandoning therefore a subject which i had not intended to touch upon 
 for i hope at the writing of this i am above the spirit of
recrimination let me tell you sir that my next motive for writing to
you in this last and most solemn manner is to beg of you to forego any
active resentments which may endanger a life so precious to all your
friends against the man to whose elaborate baseness i owe my worldly
ruin 

for ought an innocent man to run an equal risque with a guilty one 
a more than equal risque as the guilty one has been long inured to acts
of violence and is skilled in the arts of offence 

you would not arrogate to yourself god's province who has said 
vengeance is mine and i will repay it if you would i tremble for the
consequence for will it not be suitable to the divine justice to punish
the presumptuous innocent as you would be in this case in the very
error and that by the hand of the self-defending guilty reserving him
for a future day of vengeance for his accumulated crimes 

leave then the poor wretch to the divine justice let your sister's
fault die with her at least let it not be revived in blood life is a
short stage where longest a little time hence the now-green head will
be grey if it lives this little time and if heaven will afford him time
for repentance why should not you 

then think my brother what will be the consequence to your dear
parents if the guilty wretch who has occasioned to them the loss of a
daughter should likewise deprive them of their best hope and only son 
more worth in the family account than several daughters 

would you add my brother to those distresses which you hold your sister
so inexcusable for having although from involuntary and undersigned
causes given 

seek not then i beseech you to extend the evil consequences of your
sister's error his conscience when it shall please god to touch it 
will be sharper than your sword 

i have still another motive for writing to you in this solemn manner it
is to entreat you to watch over your passions the principal fault i
knew you to be guilty of is the violence of your temper when you think
yourself in the right which you would oftener be but for that very
violence 

you have several times brought your life into danger by it 

is not the man guilty of a high degree of injustice who is more apt
to give contradiction than able to bear it how often with you has
impetuosity brought on abasement a consequence too natural 

let me then caution you dear sir against a warmth of temper an
impetuosity when moved and you so ready to be moved that may hurry you
into unforeseen difficulties and which it is in some measure a sin not
to endeavour to restrain god enable you to do it for the sake of your
own peace and safety as well present as future and for the sake of your
family and friends who all see your fault but are tender of speaking to
you of it 

as for me my brother my punishment has been seasonable god gave me
grace to make a right use of my sufferings i early repented i never
loved the man half so much as i hated his actions when i saw what he was
capable of i gave up my whole heart to a better hope god blessed my
penitence and my reliance upon him and now i presume to say i am
happy 

may heave preserve you in safety health and honour and long continue
your life for a comfort and stay to your honoured parents and may you 
in that change of your single state meet with a wife as agreeable to
every one else as to yourself and be happy in a hopeful race and not
have one clarissa among them to embitter your comforts when she should
give you most comfort but may my example be of use to warn the dear
creatures whom once i hoped to live to see and to cherish of the evils
with which the deceitful world abounds are the prayers of

your affectionate sister 
cl harlowe 



letter xvii

to miss harlowe


now may you my dear arabella unrestrained by the severity of your
virtue let fall a pitying tear on the past faults and sufferings of
your late unhappy sister since now she can never offend you more 
the divine mercy which first inspired her with repentance an early
repentance it was since it preceded her sufferings for an error which
she offers not to extenuate although perhaps it were capable of some
extenuation has now as the instant that you are reading this as i
humbly hope blessed her with the fruits of it 

thus already even while she writes in imagination purified and exalted 
she the more fearlessly writes to her sister and now is assured of
pardon for all those little occasions of displeasure which her forwarder
youth might give you and for the disgrace which her fall has fastened
upon you and upon her family 

may you my sister continue to bless those dear and honoured relations 
whose indulgence so well deserves your utmost gratitude with those
cheerful instances of duty and obedience which have hitherto been so
acceptable to them and praise-worthy in you and may you when a
suitable proposal shall offer fill up more worthily that chasm which
the loss they have sustained in me has made in the family 

thus my arabella my only sister and for many happy years my friend 
most fervently prays that sister whose affection for you no acts no
unkindness no misconstruction of her conduct could cancel and who
now made perfect as she hopes through sufferings styles herself 

the happy
clarissa harlowe 



letter xviii

to john and antony harlowe esqrs 


honoured sirs 

when these lines reach your hands your late unhappy niece will have
known the end of all her troubles and as she humbly hopes will be
rejoicing in the mercies of a gracious god who has declared that he
will forgive the truly penitent of heart 

i write therefore my dear uncles and to you both in one letter since
your fraternal love has made you both but as one person to give you
comfort and not distress for however sharp my afflictions have been 
they have been but of short duration and i am betimes happily as i
hope arrived at the end of a painful journey 

at the same time i write to thank you both for all your kind indulgence
to me and to beg your forgiveness of my last my only great fault to
you and to my family 

the ways of providence are unsearchable various are the means made use
of by it to bring poor sinners to a sense of their duty some are drawn
by love others are driven by terrors to their divine refuge i had for
eighteen years out of nineteen rejoiced in the favour and affection of
every one no trouble came near to my heart i seemed to be one of those
designed to be drawn by the silken cords of love but perhaps i was
too apt to value myself upon the love and favour of every one the merit
of the good i delighted to do and of the inclinations which were given
me and which i could not help having i was perhaps too ready to
attribute to myself and now being led to account for the cause of my
temporary calamities find i had a secret pride to be punished for which
i had not fathomed and it was necessary perhaps that some sore and
terrible misfortunes should befall me in order to mortify that my pride 
and that my vanity 

temptations were accordingly sent i shrunk in the day of trial my
discretion which had been so cried up was found wanting when it came to
be weighed in an equal balance i was betrayed fell and became the
by-word of my companions and a disgrace to my family which had prided
itself in me perhaps too much but as my fault was not that of a
culpable will when my pride was sufficiently mortified i was not
suffered although surrounded by dangers and entangled in snares to be
totally lost but purified by sufferings i was fitted for the change i
have now at the time you will receive this so newly and as i humbly
hope so happily experienced 

rejoice with me then dear sirs that i have weathered so great a storm 
nor let it be matter of concern that i am cut off in the bloom of youth 
there is no inquisition in the grave  says the wise man whether we
lived ten or a hundred years and the day of death is better than the day
of our birth 

once more dear sirs accept my grateful thanks for all your goodness to
me from my early childhood to the day the unhappy day of my error 
forgive that error and god give us a happy meeting in a blessed
eternity prays

your most dutiful and obliged kinswoman 
clarissa harlowe 


mr belford gives the lady's posthumous letters to mrs hervey miss
 howe and mrs norton at length likewise but although every
 letter varies in style as well as matter from the others yet as
 they are written on the same subject and are pretty long it is
 thought proper to abstract them 

that to her aunt hervey is written in the same pious and generous strain
with those preceding seeking to give comfort rather than distress the
almighty i hope  says she has received and blessed my penitence and
i am happy could i have been more than so at the end of what is called
a happy life of twenty or thirty or forty years to come and what are
twenty or thirty or forty years to look back upon in half of any of
these periods what friends might not i have mourned for what
temptations from worldly prosperity might i not have encountered with 
and in such a case immersed in earthly pleasures how little likelihood 
that in my last stage i should have been blessed with such a
preparation and resignation as i have now been blessed with 

she proceeds as follows thus much madam of comfort to you and to
myself from this dispensation as to my dear parents i hope they will
console themselves that they have still many blessings left which ought
to balance the troubles my error has given them that unhappy as i have
been to be the interrupter of their felicities they never till this my
fault know any heavy evil that afflictions patiently borne may be
turned into blessings that uninterrupted happiness is not to be expected
in this life that after all they have not as i humbly presume to
hope the probability of the everlasting perdition of their child to
deplore and that in short when my story comes to be fully known they
will have the comfort to find that my sufferings redound more to my
honour than to my disgrace 

these considerations will i hope make their temporary loss of but one
child out of three unhappily circumstances too as she was matter of
greater consolation than affliction and the rather as we may hope for
a happy meeting once more never to be separated either by time or
offences 

she concludes this letter with an address to her cousin dolly hervey 
whom she calls her amiable cousin and thankfully remembers for the part
she took in her afflictions o my dear cousin let your worthy heart be
guarded against those delusions which have been fatal to my worldly
happiness that pity which you bestowed upon me demonstrates a
gentleness of nature which may possibly subject you to misfortunes if
your eye be permitted to mislead your judgment but a strict observance
of your filial duty my dearest cousin and the precepts of so prudent a
mother as you have the happiness to have enforced by so sad an example
in your own family as i have set will i make no doubt with the divine
assistance be your guard and security 


the posthumous letter to miss howe is extremely tender and affectionate 
she pathetically calls upon her to rejoice that all her clarissa's
troubles are now at an end that the state of temptation and trial of
doubt and uncertainty is now over with her and that she has happily
escaped the snares that were laid for her soul the rather to rejoice 
as that her misfortunes were of such a nature that it was impossible
she could be tolerably happy in this life 

she thankfully acknowledges the favours she had received from mrs howe
and mr hickman and expresses her concern for the trouble she has
occasioned to the former as well as to her and prays that all the
earthly blessings they used to wish to each other may singly devolve
upon her 

she beseeches her that she will not suspend the day which shall supply
to herself the friend she will have lost in her and give to herself a
still nearer and dearer relation 

she tells her that her choice a choice made with the approbation of
all her friends has fallen upon a sincere an honest a virtuous and 
what is more than all a pious man a man who although he admires her
person is still more in love with the graces of her mind and as those
graces are improvable with every added year of life which will impair
the transitory ones of person what a firm basis infers she has mr 
hickman chosen to build his love upon 

she prays that god will bless them together and that the remembrance
of her and of what she has suffered may not interrupt their mutual
happiness she desires them to think of nothing but what she now is and
that a time will come when they shall meet again never to be divided 

to the divine protection mean time she commits her and charges her 
by the love that has always subsisted between them that she will not
mourn too heavily for her and again calls upon her after a gentle tear 
which she will allow her to let fall in memory of their uninterrupted
friendship to rejoice that she is so early released and that she is
purified by her sufferings and is made as she assuredly trusts by
god's goodness eternally happy 


the posthumous letters to mr lovelace and mr morden will be inserted
 hereafter as will also the substance of that written to mrs 
 norton 



letter xix

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
sat afternoon sept 9 


i understand that thou breathest nothing but revenge against me for
treating thee with so much freedom and against the cursed woman and her
infernal crew i am not at all concerned for thy menaces against myself 
it is my design to make thee feel it gives me pleasure to find my
intention answered and i congratulate thee that thou hast not lost
that sense 

as to the cursed crew well do they deserve the fire here that thou
threatenest them with and the fire hereafter that seems to await them 
but i have this moment received news which will in all likelihood save
thee the guilt of punishing the old wretch for her share of wickedness as
thy agent but if that happens to her which is likely to happen wilt
thou not tremble for what may befal the principal 

not to keep thee longer in suspense last night it seems the infamous
woman got so heartily intoxicated with her beloved liquor arrack punch 
at the expense of colonel salter that mistaking her way she fell down
a pair of stairs and broke her leg and now after a dreadful night she
lies foaming raving roaring in a burning fever that wants not any
other fire to scorch her into a feeling more exquisite and durable than
any thy vengeance could give her 

the wretch has requested me to come to her and lest i should refuse a
common messenger sent her vile associate sally martin who not finding
me at soho came hither another part of her business being to procure
the divine lady's pardon for the old creature's wickedness to her 

this devil incarnate sally declares that she never was so shocked in
her life as when i told her the lady was dead 

she took out her salts to keep from fainting and when a little recovered
she accused herself for her part of the injuries the lady had sustained 
as she said polly horton would do for her's and shedding tears 
declared that the world never produced such another woman she called
her the ornament and glory of her sex acknowledged that her ruin was
owing more to their instigations than even savage as thou art to thy
own vileness since thou wert inclined to have done her justice more than
once had they not kept up thy profligate spirit to its height 

this wretch would fain have been admitted to a sight of the corpse but i
refused the request with execrations 

she could forgive herself she said for every thing but her insults upon
the admirable lady at rowland's since all the rest was but in pursuit of
a livelihood to which she had been reduced as she boasted from better
expectations and which hundred follow as well as she i did not ask
her by whom reduced 

at going away she told me that the old monster's bruises are of more
dangerous consequence than the fracture that a mortification is
apprehended and that the vile wretch has so much compunction of heart 
on recollecting her treatment of miss harlowe and is so much set upon
procuring her forgiveness that she is sure the news she is to carry her
will hasten her end 

all these things i leave upon thy reflection 



letter xx

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
sat night 


your servant gives me a dreadful account of your raving unmanageableness 
i wonder not at it but as nothing violent is lasting i dare say that
your habitual gaiety of heart will quickly get the better of your
phrensy and the rather do i judge so as your fits are of the raving
kind suitable to your natural impetuosity and not of that melancholy
species which seizes slower souls 

for this reason i will proceed in writing to you that my narrative may
not be broken by your discomposure and that the contents of it may find
you and help you to reflection when you shall be restored 

harry is returned from carrying the posthumous letters to the family and
to miss howe and that of the colonel which acquaints james harlowe with
his sister's death and with her desire to be interred near her
grandfather 

harry was not admitted into the presence of any of the family they were
all assembled together it seems at harlowe-place on occasion of the
colonel's letter which informed them of the lady's dangerous way and
were comforting themselves as harry was told with hopes that mr morden
had made the worst of her state in order to quicken their resolutions 


 see the beginning of letter ii 


it is easy to judge what must be their grief and surprise on receiving
the fatal news which the letters harry sent in to them communicated 

he staid there long enough to find the whole house in confusion the
servants running different ways lamenting and wringing their hands as
they ran the female servants particularly as if somebody poor mrs 
harlowe no doubt and perhaps mrs hervey too were in fits 

every one was in such disorder that he could get no commands nor obtain
any notice of himself the servants seemed more inclined to execrate
than welcome him o master o young man cried three or four together 
what dismal tidings have you brought they helped him at the very first
word to his horse which with great civility they had put up on his
arrival and he went to an inn and pursued on foot his way to mrs 
norton's and finding her come to town left the letter he carried don
for her with her son a fine youth who when he heard the fatal news 
burst out into a flood of tears first lamenting the lady's death and
then crying out what what would become of his poor mother how would
she support herself when she should find on her arrival in town that
the dear lady who was so deservedly the darling of her heart was no
more 

he proceeded to miss howe's with the letter for her that lady he was
told had just given orders for a young man a tenant's son to post to
london and bring her news of her dear friend's condition and whether
she should herself be encouraged by an account of her being still alive 
to make her a visit every thing being ordered to be in readiness for her
going up on his return with the news she wished and prayed for with the
utmost impatience and harry was just in time to prevent the man's
setting out 

he had the precaution to desire to speak with miss howe's woman or maid 
and communicated to her the fatal tidings that she might break them to
her young lady the maid herself was so affected that her old lady
 who harry said seemed to be every where at once came to see what
ailed her and was herself so struck with the communication that she
was forced to sit down in a chair o the sweet creature said she and
is it come to this o my poor nancy how shall i be able to break the
matter to my nancy 

mr hickman was in the house he hastened in to comfort the old lady 
but he could not restrain his own tears he feared he said when he was
last in town that this sad event would soon happen but little thought
it would be so very soon but she is happy i am sure said the good
gentleman 

mrs howe when a little recovered went up in order to break the news
to her daughter she took the letter and her salts in her hand and
they had occasion for the latter for the housekeeper soon came hurrying
down into the kitchen her face overspread with tears her young mistress
had fainted away she said nor did she wonder at it never did there
live a lady more deserving of general admiration and lamentation than
miss clarissa harlowe and never was there a stronger friendship
dissolved by death than between her young lady and her 

she hurried with a lighted wax candle and with feathers to burn under
the nose of her young mistress which showed that she continued in fits 

mr hickman afterwards with his usual humanity directed that harry
should be taken care of all night it being then the close of day he
asked him after my health he expressed himself excessively afflicted 
as well for the death of the most excellent of women as for the just
grief of the lady whom he so passionately loves but he called the
departed lady an angel of light we dreaded said he tell your
master to read the letter sent but we needed not tis a blessed
letter written by a blessed hand but the consolation she aims to give 
will for the present heighten the sense we all shall have of the loss of
so excellent a creature tell mr belford that i thank god i am not the
man who had the unmerited honour to call himself her brother 

i know how terribly this great catastrophe as i may call it since so
many persons are interested in it affects thee i should have been glad
to have had particulars of the distress which the first communication of
it must have given to the harlowes yet who but must pity the unhappy
mother 

the answer which james harlowe returned to colonel morden's letter of
notification of his sister's death and to her request as to her
interment will give a faint idea of what their concern must be here
follows a copy of it 


to william morden esq 
saturday sept 9 


dear cousin 

i cannot find words to express what we all suffer on the most mournful
news that ever was communicated to us 

my sister arabella but alas i have now no other sister was preparing
to follow mrs norton up and i had resolved to escort her and to have
looked in upon the dear creature 

god be merciful to us all to what purpose did the doctor write if she
was so near her end why as every body says did he not send sooner 
or why at all 

the most admirable young creature that ever swerved not one friend to
be with her alas sir i fear my mother will never get over this shock 
 she has been in hourly fits ever since she received the fatal news my
poor father has the gout thrown into his stomach and heaven knows o
cousin o sir i meant nothing but the honour of the family yet have i
all the weight thrown upon me  o this cursed lovelace may i perish if
he escape the deserved vengeance   


 the words thus enclosed    were omitted in the transcript to mr 
lovelace 


we had begun to please ourselves that we should soon see her here good
heaven that her next entrance into this house after she abandoned us so
precipitately should be in a coffin 

we can have nothing to do with her executor another strange step of the
dear creature's he cannot expect we will nor if he be a gentleman 
will he think of acting do you therefore be pleased sir to order an
undertaker to convey the body down to us my mother says she shall be
for ever unhappy if she may not in death see the dear creature whom she
could not see in life be so kind therefore as to direct the lid to be
only half-screwed down that if my poor mother cannot be prevailed upon
to dispense with so shocking a spectacle she may be obliged she was the
darling of her heart 

if we know her well in relation to the funeral it shall be punctually
complied with as shall every thing in it that is fit or reasonable to be
performed and this without the intervention of strangers 

will you not dear sir favour us with your presence at this melancholy
time pray do and pity and excuse with the generosity which is natural
to the brave and the wise what passed at our last meeting every one's
respects attend you and i am sir 

your inexpressibly afflicted cousin and servant 
ja harlowe jun 


every thing that's fit or reasonable to be performed  repeated i to the
colonel from the above letter on his reading it to me   that is every
thing which she has directed that can be performed i hope colonel 
that i shall have no contention with them i wish no more for their
acquaintance than they do for mine but you sir must be the mediator
between them and me for i shall insist upon a literal performance in
every article 

the colonel was so kind as to declare that he would support me in my
resolution 



letter xxi

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
sunday morn eight o'clock sept 10 


i staid at smith's till i saw the last of all that is mortal of the
divine lady 

as she has directed rings by her will to several persons with her hair
to be set in crystal the afflicted mrs norton cut off before the
coffin was closed four charming ringlets one of which the colonel took
for a locket which he says he will cause to be made and wear next his
heart in memory of his beloved cousin 

between four and five in the morning the corpse was put into the hearse 
the coffin before being filled as intended with flowers and aromatic
herbs and proper care taken to prevent the corpse suffering to the eye 
from the jolting of the hearse 

poor mrs norton is extremely ill i gave particular directions to mrs 
smith's maid whom i have ordered to attend the good woman in a mourning
chariot to take care of her the colonel who rides with his servants
within view of the hearse says that he will see my orders in relation to
her enforced 

when the hearse moved off and was out of sight i locked up the lady's
chamber into which all that had belonged to her was removed 

i expect to hear from the colonel as soon as he is got down by a servant
of his own 



letter xxii

mr mowbray to john belford esq 
uxbridge sunday morn nine o'clock 


dear jack 

i send you enclosed a letter from mr lovelace which though written in
the cursed algebra i know to be such a one as will show what a queer way
he is in for he read it to us with the air of a tragedian you will see
by it what the mad fellow had intended to do if we had not all of us
interposed he was actually setting out with a surgeon of this place to
have the lady opened and embalmed rot me if it be not my full
persuasion that if he had her heart would have been found to be either
iron or marble 

we have got lord m to him his lordship is also much afflicted at the
lady's death his sisters and nieces he says will be ready to break
their hearts what a rout's here about a woman for after all she was
no more 

we have taken a pailful of black bull's blood from him and this has
lowered him a little but he threatens col morden he threatens you for
your cursed reflections  cursed reflections indeed jack   and curses
all the world and himself still 

last night his mourning which is full as deep as for a wife was brought
home and his fellows' mourning too and though eight o'clock he would
put it on and make them attend him in theirs 

every body blames him on this lady's account but i see not for why 
she was a vixen in her virtue what a pretty fellow she has ruined hey 
jack and her relations are ten times more to blame than he i will
prove this to the teeth of them all if they could use her ill why
should they expect him to use her well you or i or tourville in his
shoes would have done as he has done are not all the girls forewarned 
 has he done by her as that caitiff miles did to the farmer's daughter 
whom he tricked up to town a pretty girl also just such another as
bob s rosebud under a notion of waiting on a lady drilled her on 
pretending the lady was abroad drank her light-hearted then carried
her to a play then it was too late you know to see the pretended lady
 then to a bagnio ruined her as they call it and all this the same
day kept her on an ugly dog too a fortnight or three weeks then
left her to the mercy of the people of the bagnio never paying for any
thing who stript her of all her clothes and because she would not take
on threw her into prison where she died in want and despair  a true
story thou knowest jack this fellow deserved to be d d but has
our bob been such a villain as this and would he not have married this
flinty-hearted lady so he is justified very evidently 

why then should such cursed qualms take him who would have thought he
had been such poor blood now  rot the puppy   to see him sit silent in a
corner when he has tired himself with his mock majesty and with his
argumentation who so fond of arguing as he and teaching his shadow to
make mouths against the wainscot the devil fetch me if i have patience
with him 

but he has had no rest for these ten days that's the thing you must
write to him and pr'ythee coax him jack and send him what he writes
for and give him all his way there will be no bearing him else and
get the lady buried as fast as you can and don't let him know where 

this letter should have gone yesterday we told him it did but were in
hopes he would have inquired after it again but he raves as he has not
any answer 

what he vouchsafed to read of other of your letters has given my lord
such a curiosity as makes him desire you to continue your accounts pray
do but not in your hellish arabic and we will let the poor fellow only
into what we think fitting for his present way 

i live a cursed dull poking life here what with i so lately saw of poor
belton and what i now see of this charming fellow i shall be as crazy
as he soon or as dull as thou jack so must seek for better company in
town than either of you i have been forced to read sometimes to divert
me and you know i hate reading it presently sets me into a fit of
drowsiness and then i yawn and stretch like a devil 

yet in dryden's palemon and arcite have i just now met with a passage 
that has in it much of our bob s case these are some of the lines 


mr mowbray then recites some lines from that poem describing a
 distracted man and runs the parallel and then priding himself
 in his performance says 

let me tell you that had i begun to write as early as you and lovelace 
i might have cut as good a figure as either of you why not but boy or
man i ever hated a book tis folly to lie i loved action my boy i
hated droning and have led in former days more boys from their book 
than ever my master made to profit by it kicking and cuffing and
orchard-robbing were my early glory 

but i am tired of writing i never wrote such a long letter in my life 
my wrist and my fingers and thumb ache d n y the pen is an
hundred weight at least and my eyes are ready to drop out of my head
upon the paper the cramp but this minute in my fingers rot the goose
and the goose-quill i will write no more long letters for a
twelve-month to come yet one word we think the mad fellow coming to 
adieu 



letter xxiii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
uxbridge sat sept 9 


jack 

i think it absolutely right that my ever-dear and beloved lady should be
opened and embalmed it must be done out of hand this very afternoon 
your acquaintance tomkins and old anderson of this place i will bring
with me shall be the surgeons i have talked to the latter about it 

i will see every thing done with that decorum which the case and the
sacred person of my beloved require 

every thing that can be done to preserve the charmer from decay shall
also be done and when she will descend to her original dust or cannot
be kept longer i will then have her laid in my family-vault between my
own father and mother myself as i am in my soul so in person chief
mourner but her heart to which i have such unquestionable pretensions 
in which once i had so large a share and which i will prize above my
own i will have i will keep it in spirits it shall never be out of
my sight and all the charges of sepulture too shall be mine 

surely nobody will dispute my right to her whose was she living whose
is she dead but mine her cursed parents whose barbarity to her no
doubt was the true cause of her death have long since renounced her 
she left them for me she chose me therefore and i was her husband 
what though i treated her like a villain do i not pay for it now 
would she not have been mine had i not nobody will dispute but she
would and has she not forgiven me i am then in statu quo prius with
her am i not as if i had never offended whose then can she be but
mine 

i will free you from your executorship and all your cares 

take notice belford that i do hereby actually discharge you and every
body from all cares and troubles relating to her and as to her last
testament i will execute it myself 

there were no articles between us no settlements and she is mine as
you see i have proved to a demonstration nor could she dispose of
herself but as i pleased d n n seize me then if i make not good
my right against all opposers 

her bowels if her friends are very solicitous about them and very
humble and sorrowful and none have they of their own shall be sent
down to them to be laid with her ancestors unless she has ordered
otherwise for except that she shall not be committed to the unworthy
earth so long as she can be kept out of it her will shall be performed
in every thing 

i send in the mean time for a lock of her hair 

i charge you stir not in any part of her will but by my express
direction i will order every thing myself for am i not her husband 
and being forgiven by her am i not the chosen of her heart what else
signifies her forgiveness 

the two insufferable wretches you have sent me plague me to death and
would treat me like a babe in strings d n the fellows what end can
they mean by it yet that crippled monkey doleman joins with them and 
as i hear them whisper they have sent for lord m to controul me i
suppose 

what i write to you for is 

1 to forbid you intermeddling with any thing relating to her to
forbid morden intermeddling also if i remember right he has threatened
me and cursed me and used me ill and let him be gone from her if he
would avoid my resentment 

2 to send me a lock of her hair instantly by the bearer 

3 to engage tomkins to have every thing ready for the opening and
embalming i shall bring anderson with me 

4 to get her will and every thing ready for my perusal and
consideration 

i will have possession of her dear heart this very night and let tomkins
provide a proper receptacle and spirits till i can get a golden one made
for it 

i will take her papers and as no one can do her memory justice equal
to myself and i will not spare myself who can better show the world
what she was and what a villain he that could use her ill and the
world shall also see what implacable and unworthy parents she had 

all shall be set forth in words at length no mincing of the matter 
names undisguised as well as facts for as i shall make the worst
figure in it myself and have a right to treat myself as nobody else
shall who shall controul me who dare call me to account 

let me know if the d d mother be yet the subject of the devil's own
vengeance if the old wretch be dead or alive some exemplary mischief
i must yet do my revenge shall sweep away that devil and all my
opposers of the cruel harlowe family from the face of the earth whole
hecatombs ought to be offered up to the manes of my clarissa lovelace 

although her will may in some respects cross mine yet i expect to be
observed i will be the interpreter of her's 

next to mine her's shall be observed for she is my wife and shall be
to all eternity i will never have another 

adieu jack i am preparing to be with you i charge you as you value
my life or your own do not oppose me in any thing relating to my
clarissa lovelace 

my temper is entirely altered i know not what it is to laugh or smile 
or be pleasant i am grown choleric and impatient and will not be
controuled 

i write this in characters as i used to do that nobody but you should
know what i write for never was any man plagued with impertinents as
i am 

r lovelace 


in a separate paper enclosed in the above 

let me tell thee in characters still that i am in a dreadful way just
now my brain is all boiling like a cauldron over a fiery furnace what
a devil is the matter with me i wonder i never was so strange in my
life 

in truth jack i have been a most execrable villain and when i
consider all my actions to the angel of a woman and in her the piety 
the charity the wit the beauty i have helped to destroy and the good
to the world i have thereby been a mean of frustrating i can pronounce
d n n upon myself how then can i expect mercy any where else 

i believe i shall have no patience with you when i see you your d d
stings and reflections have almost turned my brain 

but here lord m they tell me is come d n him and those who sent
for him 

i know not what i have written but her dear heart and a lock of her
hair i will have let who will be the gainsayers for is she not mine 
whose else can she be she has no father nor mother no sister no
brother no relations but me and my beloved is mine and i am her's 
and that's enough but oh 

 she's out the damp of death has quench'd her quite 
 those spicy doors her lips are shut close lock'd 
 which never gale of life shall open more 

and is it so is it indeed so good god good god but they will not
let me write on i must go down to this officious peer who the devil
sent for him 



letter xxiv

mr belford to richard mowbray esq 
sunday sept 10 four in the afternoon 


i have your's with our unhappy friend's enclosed i am glad my lord is
with him as i presume that his phrensy will be but of short
continuance i most earnestly wish that on his recovery he could be
prevailed upon to go abroad mr morden who is inconsolable has seen
by the will as indeed he suspected before he read it that the case
was more than a common seduction and has dropt hints already that he
looks on himself on that account as freed from his promises made to the
dying lady which were that he would not seek to avenge her death 

you must make the recovery of his health the motive for urging him on
this head for if you hint at his own safety he will not stir but
rather seek the colonel 

as to the lock of hair you may easily pacify him as you once saw the
angel with hair near the colour if he be intent upon it 

at my lord's desire i will write on and in my common hand that you may
judge what is and what is not fit to be read to mr lovelace at
present but as i shall not forbear reflections as i go along in hopes
to reach his heart on his recovery i think it best to direct myself to
him still and that as if he were not disordered 

as i shall not have leisure to take copies and yet am willing to have
the whole subject before me for my own future contemplation i must
insist upon a return of my letters some time hence mr lovelace knows
that this is one of my conditions and has hitherto complied with it 

thy letter mowbray is an inimitable performance thou art a strange
impenetrable creature but let me most earnestly conjure thee and the
idle flutterer tourville from what you have seen of poor belton's exit 
from our friend lovelace's phrensy and the occasion of it and from the
terrible condition in which the wretched sinclair lies to set about an
immediate change of life and manners for my own part i am determined 
be your resolutions what they may to take the advice i give 

as witness 
j belford 



letter xxv

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 


o lovelace i have a scene to paint in relation to the wretched sinclair 
that if i do it justice will make thee seriously ponder and reflect or
nothing can i will lead thee to it in order and that in my usual hand 
that thy compeers may be able to read it as well as thyself 

when i had written the preceding letter not knowing what to do with
myself recollecting and in vain wishing for that delightful and
improving conversation which i had now for ever lost i thought i had as
good begin the task which i had for some time past resolved to begin 
that is to say to go to church and see if i could not reap some benefit
from what i should hear there accordingly i determined to go to hear
the celebrated preacher at st james's church but as if the devil for
so i was then ready to conclude thought himself concerned to prevent my
intention a visit was made me just as i was dressed which took me off
from my purpose 

from whom should this visit be but from sally martin accompanied by
mrs carter the sister of the infamous sinclair the same i suppose i
need not tell you who keeps the bagnio near bloomsbury 

these told me that the surgeon apothecary and physician had all given
the wretched woman over but that she said she should not die nor be at
rest till she saw me and they besought me to accompany them in the
coach they came in if i had one spark of charity of christian charity 
as they called it left 

i was very loth to be diverted from my purpose by a request so unwelcome 
and from people so abhorred but at last went and we got thither by ten 
where a scene so shocking presented itself to me that the death of poor
desponding belton is not i think to be compared with it 

the old wretch had once put her leg out by her rage and violence and had
been crying scolding cursing ever since the preceding evening that
the surgeon had told her it was impossible to save her and that a
mortification had begun to show itself insomuch that purely in
compassion to their own ears they had been forced to send for another
surgeon purposely to tell her though against his judgment and being a
friend of the other to seem to convince him that he mistook the case 
and that if she would be patient she might recover but nevertheless 
her apprehensions of death and her antipathy to the thoughts of dying 
were so strong that their imposture had not the intended effect and she
was raving crying cursing and even howling more like a wolf than a
human creature when i came so that as i went up stairs i said surely
this noise this howling cannot be from the unhappy woman sally said
it was and assured me that it was noting to the noise she had made all
night and stepping into her room before me dear madam sinclair said
she forbear this noise it is more like that of a bull than a woman 
here comes mr belford and you'll fright him away if you bellow at this
rate 

there were no less than eight of her cursed daughters surrounding her bed
when i entered one of her partners polly horton at their head and now
sally her other partner and madam carter as they called her for they
are all madams with one another made the number ten all in shocking
dishabille and without stays except sally carter and polly who not
daring to leave her had not been in bed all night 

the other seven seemed to have been but just up risen perhaps from their
customers in the fore-house and their nocturnal orgies with faces 
three or four of them that had run the paint lying in streaky seams not
half blowzed off discovering coarse wrinkled skins the hair of some of
them of divers colours obliged to the black-lead comb where black was
affected the artificial jet however yielding apace to the natural
brindle that of others plastered with oil and powder the oil
predominating but every one's hanging about her ears and neck in broken
curls or ragged ends and each at my entrance taken with one motion 
stroking their matted locks with both hands under their coifs mobs or
pinners every one of which was awry they were all slip-shoed 
stockingless some only under-petticoated all their gowns made to cover
straddling hoops hanging trollopy and tangling about their heels but
hastily wrapt round them as soon as i came up stairs and half of them
 unpadded shoulder-bent pallid-lips limber-jointed wretches 
appearing from a blooming nineteen or twenty perhaps over-night haggard
well-worn strumpets of thirty-eight or forty 

i am the more particular in describing to thee the appearance these
creatures made in my eyes when i came into the room because i believe
thou never sawest any of them much less a group of them thus unprepared
for being seen i for my part never did before nor had i now but
upon this occasion being thus favoured if thou hadst i believe thou
wouldst hate a profligate woman as one of swift's yahoos or virgil's
obscene harpies squirting their ordure upon the trojan trenches since
the persons of such in their retirements are as filthy as their minds 
hate them as much as i do and as much as i admire and next to adore a
truly virtuous and elegant woman for to me it is evident that as a neat
and clean woman must be an angel of a creature so a sluttish one is the
impurest animal in nature but these were the veterans the chosen band 
for now-and-then flitted in to the number of half a dozen or more by
turns subordinate sinners under-graduates younger than some of the
chosen phalanx but not less obscene in their appearance though indeed
not so much beholden to the plastering focus yet unpropt by stays 
squalid loose in attire sluggish-haired uner-petticoated only as the
former eyes half-opened winking and pinking mispatched yawning 
stretching as if from the unworn-off effects of the midnight revel all
armed in succession with supplies of cordials of which every one present
was either taster or partaker under the direction of the busier dorcas 
who frequently popt in to see her slops duly given and taken 


 whoever has seen dean swift's lady's dressing room will think this
description of mr belford's not only more natural but more decent
painting as well as better justified by the design and by the use that
may be made of it 


but when i approached the old wretch what a spectacle presented itself
to my eyes 

her misfortune has not at all sunk but rather as i thought increased
her flesh rage and violence perhaps swelling her muscular features 
behold her then spreading the whole troubled bed with her huge quaggy
carcase her mill-post arms held up her broad hands clenched with
violence her big eyes goggling and flaming ready as we may suppose
those of a salamander her matted griesly hair made irreverend by her
wickedness her clouted head-dress being half off spread about her fat
ears and brawny neck her livid lips parched and working violently 
her broad chin in convulsive motion her wide mouth by reason of the
contraction of her forehead which seemed to be half-lost in its own
frightful furrows splitting her face as it were into two parts and
her huge tongue hideously rolling in it heaving puffing as if four
breath her bellows-shaped and various-coloured breasts ascending by
turns to her chin and descending out of sight with the violence of her
gaspings 

this was the spectacle as recollection has enabled me to describe it 
that this wretch made to my eye by her suffragans and daughters who
surveyed her with scouling frighted attention which one might easily
see had more in it of horror and self-concern and self-condemnation too 
than of love or pity as who should say see what we ourselves must one
day be 

as soon as she saw me her naturally-big voice more hoarsened by her
ravings broke upon me o mr belford o sir see what i am come to 
see what i am brought to to have such a cursed crew about me and not
one of them to take care of me but to let me tumble down stairs so
distant from the room i went from so distant from the room i meant to go
to cursed cursed be every careless devil may this or worse be their
fate every one of them 

and then she cursed and swore most vehemently and the more as two or
three of them were excusing themselves on the score of their being at
that time as unable to help themselves as she as soon as she had
cleared the passage of her throat by the oaths and curses which her wild
impatience made her utter she began in a more hollow and whining strain
to bemoan herself and here said she heaven grant me patience 
 clenching and unclenching her hands  am i to die thus miserably of a
broken leg in my old age snatched away by means of my own intemperance 
self-do self-undone no time for my affairs no time to repent and
in a few hours oh oh with another long howling o h u gh o a
kind of screaming key terminating it who knows who can tell where i
shall be oh that indeed i never never had had a being 

what could one say to such a wretch as this whose whole life had been
spent in the most diffusive wickedness and who no doubt has numbers of
souls to answer for yet i told her she must be patient that her
violence made her worse and that if she would compose herself she
might get into a frame more proper for her present circumstances 

who i interrupted she i get into a better frame i who can neither
cry nor pray yet already feel the torments of the d d what mercy
can i expect what hope is left for me then that sweet creature that
incomparable miss harlowe she it seems is dead and gone o that
cursed man had it not been for him i had never had this the most
crying of all my sins to answer for 

and then she set up another howl 

and is she dead indeed dead proceeded she when her howl was over o
what an angel have i been the means of destroying for though it was
that it was mine and your's and your's and your's devils as we all
were  turning to sally to polly and to one or two more  that he did not
do her justice and that that is my curse and will one day be yours 
and then again she howled 

i still advised patience i said that if her time were to be so short
as she apprehended the more ought she to endeavour to compose herself 
and then she would at least die with more ease to herself and
satisfaction to her friends i was going to say but the word die put her
into a violent raving and thus she broke in upon me die did you say 
sir die i will not i cannot die i know not how to die die sir 
 and must i then die leave this world i cannot bear it and who
brought you hither sir  her eyes striking fire at me  who brought you
hither to tell me i must die sir i cannot i will not leave this
world let others die who wish for another who expect a better i
have had my plagues in this but would compound for all future hopes so
as i may be nothing after this 

and then she howled and bellowed by turns 

by my faith lovelace i trembled in every joint and looking upon her
who spoke this and roared thus and upon the company round me i more
than once thought myself to be in one of the infernal mansions 

yet will i proceed and try for thy good if i can shock thee but half
as much with my descriptions as i was shocked with what i saw and heard 

sally polly sister carter said she did you not tell me i might
recover did not the surgeon tell me i might 

and so you may cried sally monsieur garon says you may if you'll be
patient but as i have often told you this blessed morning you are
reader to take despair from your own fears than comfort from all the
hope we can give you 

yet cried the wretch interrupting does not mr belford and to him you
have told the truth though you won't to me does not he tell me that i
shall die i cannot bear it i cannot bear the thoughts of dying 

and then but that half a dozen at once endeavoured to keep down her
violent hands would she have beaten herself as it seems she had often
attempted to do from the time the surgeon popt out the word mortification
to her 

well but to what purpose said i turning aside to her sister and to
sally and polly are these hopes given her if the gentlemen of the
faculty give her over you should let her know the worst and then she
must submit for there is no running away from death if she had any
matters to settle put her upon settling them and do not by telling her
she will live when there is no room to expect it take from her the
opportunity of doing needful things do the surgeons actually give her
over 

they do whispered they her gross habit they say gives no hopes we
have sent for both surgeons whom we expect every minute 

both the surgeons who are french for mrs sinclair has heard tourville
launch out in the praise of french surgeons came in while we were thus
talking i retired to the farther end of the room and threw up a window
for a little air being half-poisoned by the effluvia arising from so
many contaminated carcases which gave me no imperfect idea of the stench
of gaols which corrupting the ambient air gives what is called the
prison distemper 

i came back to the bed-side when the surgeons had inspected the fracture 
and asked them if there were any expectation of her life 

one of them whispered me there was none that she had a strong fever
upon her which alone in such a habit would probably do the business 
and that the mortification had visibly gained upon her since they were
there six hours ago 

will amputation save her her affairs and her mind want settling a
few days added to her life may be of service to her in both respects 

they told me the fracture was high in her leg that the knee was greatly
bruised that the mortification in all probability had spread half-way
of the femur and then getting me between them three or four of the
women joining us and listening with their mouths open and all the signs
of ignorant wonder in their faces as there appeared of self-sufficiency
in those of the artists did they by turns fill my ears with an
anatomical description of the leg and thigh running over with terms of
art of the tarsus the metatarsus the tibia the fibula the patella 
the os tali the os tibae the tibialis posticus and tibialis anticus up
to the os femoris to the acetabulum of the os ischion the great
trochanter glutaeus triceps lividus and little rotators in short of
all the muscles cartilages and bones that constitute the leg and thigh
from the great toe to the hip as if they would show me that all their
science had penetrated their heads no farther than their mouths while
sally lifted up her hands with a laud bless me are all surgeons so
learned but at last both the gentlemen declared that if she and her
friends would consent to amputation they would whip off her leg in a
moment 

mrs carter asked to what purpose if the operation would not save her 

very true they said but it might be a satisfaction to the patient's
friends that all was done that could be done 

and so the poor wretch was to be lanced and quartered as i may say for
an experiment only and without any hope of benefit from the operation 
was to pay the surgeons for tormenting her 

i cannot but say i have a mean opinion of both these gentlemen who 
though they make a figure it seems in their way of living and boast
not only french extraction but a paris education never will make any in
their practice 

how unlike my honest english friend tomkins a plain serious intelligent
man whose art lies deeper than in words who always avoids parade and
jargon and endeavours to make every one as much a judge of what he is
about as himself 

all the time that the surgeons ran on with their anatomical process the
wretched woman most frightfully roared and bellowed which the gentlemen
 who showed themselves to be of the class of those who are not affected
with the evils they do not feel took no other notice of than by
raising their voices to be heard as she raised her's being evidently
more solicitous to increase their acquaintance and to propagate the
notion of their skill than to attend to the clamours of the poor wretch
whom they were called in to relieve though by this very means like the
dog and the shadow in the fable they lost both aims with me for i never
was deceived in one rule which i made early to wit that the stillest
water is the deepest while the bubbling stream only betrays shallowness 
and that stones and pebbles lie there so near the surface to point out
the best place to ford a river dry shod 

as nobody cared to tell the unhappy wretch what every one apprehended
must follow and what the surgeons convinced me soon would i undertook
to be the denouncer of her doom accordingly the operators being
withdrawn i sat down by the bed-side and said come mrs sinclair let
me advise you to forbear these ravings at the carelessness of those who 
i find at the time could take no care of themselves and since the
accident has happened and cannot be remedied to resolve to make the
best of the matter for all this violence but enrages the malady and you
will probably fall into a delirium if you give way to it which will
deprive you of that reason which you ought to make the best of for the
time it may be lent you 

she turned her head towards me and hearing me speak with a determined
voice and seeing me assume as determined an air became more calm and
attentive 

i went on telling her that i was glad from the hints she had given 
to find her concerned for her past misspent life and particularly for
the part she had had in the ruin of the most excellent woman on earth 
that if she would compose herself and patiently submit to the
consequences of an evil she had brought upon herself it might possibly
be happy for her yet meantime continued i tell me with temper and
calmness why was you so desirous to see me 

she seemed to be in great confusion of thought and turned her head this
way and that and at last after much hesitation said alad for me i
hardly know what i wanted with you when i awoke from my intemperate
trance and found what a cursed way i was in my conscience smote me and
i was for catching like a drowning wretch at every straw i wanted to
see every body and any body but those i did see every body who i thought
could give me comfort yet could i expect none from you neither for you
had declared yourself my enemy although i had never done you harm for
what jackey in her old tone whining through her nose was miss harlowe
to you but she is happy but oh what will become of me yet tell me 
 for the surgeons have told you the truth no doubt tell me shall i do
well again may i recover if i may i will begin a new course of life 
as i hope to be saved i will i'll renounce you all every one of you 
 looking round her   and scrape all i can together and live a life of
penitence and when i die leave it all to charitable uses i will by my
soul every doit of it to charity but this once lifting up her rolling
eyes and folded hands with a wry-mouthed earnestness in which every
muscle and feature of her face bore its part this one time good god of
heaven and earth but this once this once repeating those words five or
six times spare thy poor creature and every hour of my life shall be
passed in penitence and atonement upon my soul it shall 

less vehement a little less vehement said i it is not for me who have
led so free a life as you but too well know to talk to you in a
reproaching strain and to set before you the iniquity you have lived in 
and the many souls you have helped to destroy but as you are in so
penitent a way if i might advise you should send for a good clergyman 
the purity of whose life and manners may make all these things come from
him with a better grace than they can from me 

how sir what sir interrupting me send for a parson then you
indeed think i shall die then you think there is no room for hope a
parson sir who sends for a parson while there is any hope left 
the sight of a parson would be death immediate to me i cannot cannot
die never tell me of it what die what cut off in the midst of my
sins 

and then she began again to rave 

i cannot bear said i rising from my seat with a stern air to see a
reasonable creature behave so outrageously will this vehemence think
you mend the matter will it avail you any thing will it not rather
shorten the life you are so desirous to have lengthened and deprive you
of the only opportunity you can ever have to settle your affairs for both
worlds death is but the common lot and if it be your's soon looking
at her it will be also your's and your's and your's speaking with a
raised voice and turning to every trembling devil round her  for they
all shook at my forcible application   and mine too and you have reason
to be thankful turning again to her that you did not perish in that act
of intemperance which brought you to this for it might have been your
neck as well as your leg and then you had not had the opportunity you
now have for repentance and the lord have mercy upon you into what a
state might you have awoke 

then did the poor wretch set up an inarticulate frightful howl such a
one as i never before heard of her and seeing every one half-frighted 
and me motioning to withdraw o pity me pity me mr belford cried she 
her words interrupted by groans i find you think i shall die and what
may i be and where in a very few hours who can tell 

i told her it was vain to flatter her it was my opinion she would not
recover 

i was going to re-advise her to calm her spirits and endeavour to resign
herself and to make the beset of the opportunity yet left her but this
declaration set her into a most outrageous raving she would have torn
her hair and beaten her breast had not some of the wretches held her
hands by force while others kept her as steady as they could lest she
should again put out her new-set leg so that seeing her thus incapable
of advice and in a perfect phrensy i told sally martin that there was
no bearing the room and that their best way was to send for a minister
to pray by her and to reason with her as soon as she should be capable
of it and so i left them and never was so sensible of the benefit of
fresh air as i was the moment i entered the street 

nor is it to be wondered at when it is considered that to the various
ill smells that will always be found in a close sick bed-room for
generally when the physician comes the air is shut out this of mrs 
sinclair was the more particularly offensive as to the scent of
plasters salves and ointments were added the stenches of spirituous
liquors burnt and unburnt of all denominations for one or other of
the creatures under pretence of colics gripes or qualms were
continually calling for supplies of these all the time i was there 
and yet this is thought to be a genteel house of the sort and all the
prostitutes in it are prostitutes of price and their visiters people of
note 

o lovelace what lives do most of us rakes and libertines lead what
company do we keep and for such company what society renounce or
endeavour to make like these 

what woman nice in her person and of purity in her mind and manners 
did she know what miry wallowers the generality of men of our class are
in themselves and constantly trough and sty with but would detest the
thoughts of associating with such filthy sensualists whose favourite
taste carries them to mingle with the dregs of stews brothels and
common sewers 

yet to such a choice are many worthy women betrayed by that false and
inconsiderate notion raised and propagated no doubt by the author of
all delusion that a reformed rake makes the best husband we rakes 
indeed are bold enough to suppose that women in general are as much
rakes in their hearts as the libertines some of them suffer themselves
to be take with are in their practice a supposition therefore which
it behoves persons of true honour of that sex to discountenance by
rejecting the address of every man whose character will not stand the
test of that virtue which is the glory of a woman and indeed i may
say of a man too why should it not 

how indeed can it be if this point be duly weighed that a man who
thinks alike of all the sex and knows it to be in the power of a wife
to do him the greatest dishonour man can receive and doubts not her will
to do it if opportunity offer and importunity be not wanting that such
a one from principle should be a good husband to any woman and 
indeed little do innocents think what a total revolution of manners 
what a change of fixed habits nay what a conquest of a bad nature and
what a portion of divine grace is required to make a man a good
husband a worthy father and true friend from principle especially
when it is considered that it is not in a man's own power to reform when
he will this to say nothing of my own experience thou lovelace 
hast found in the progress of thy attempts upon the divine miss harlowe 
for whose remorses could be deeper or more frequent yet more transient
than thine 

now lovelace let me know if the word grace can be read from my pen
without a sneer from thee and thy associates i own that once it sounded
oddly in my ears but i shall never forget what a grave man once said on
this very word that with him it was a rake's sibboleth he had always
hopes of one who could bear the mention of it without ridiculing it and
ever gave him up for an abandoned man who made a jest of it or of him
who used it 


 see judges xii 6 


don't be disgusted that i mingle such grave reflections as these with my
narratives it becomes me in my present way of thinking to do so when
i see in miss harlowe how all human excellence and in poor belton how
all inhuman libertinism and am near seeing in this abandoned woman how
all diabolical profligacy end and glad should i be for your own sake 
for your splendid family's sake and for the sake of all your intimates
and acquaintance that you were labouring under the same impressions 
that so we who have been companions in and promoters of one another's 
wickedness might join in a general atonement to the utmost of our power 

i came home reflecting upon all these things more edifying to me than
any sermon i could have heard preached and i shall conclude this long
letter with observing that although i left the wretched howler in a high
phrensy-fit which was excessively shocking to the by-standers yet her
phrensy must be the happiest part of her dreadful condition for when she
is herself as it is called what must be her reflections upon her past
profligate life throughout which it has been her constant delight and
business devil-like to make others as wicked as herself what must her
terrors be a hell already begun in her mind on looking forward to the
dreadful state she is now upon the verge of but i drop my trembling
pen 


to have done with so shocking a subject at once we shall take notice 
 that mr belford in a future letter writes that the miserable
 woman to the surprise of the operators themselves through hourly
 increasing tortures of body and mind held out so long as till
 thursday sept 21 and then died in such agonies as terrified into
 a transitory penitence all the wretches about her 



letter xxvi

colonel morden to john belford esq 
sunday night sept 10 


dear sir 

according to my promise i send you an account of matters here poor
mrs norton was so very ill upon the road that slowly as the hearse
moved and the chariot followed i was afraid we should not have got her
to st albans we put up there as i had intended i was in hopes that
she would have been better for the stop but i was forced to leave her
behind me i ordered the maid-servant you were so considerately kind as
to send down with her to be very careful of her and left the chariot to
attend her she deserves all the regard that can be paid her not only
upon my cousin's account but on her own she is an excellent woman 

when we were within five miles of harlowe-place i put on a hand-gallop 
i ordered the hearse to proceed more slowly still the cross-road we were
in being rough and having more time before us than i wanted for i
wished not the hearse to be in till near dusk i got to harlowe-place
about four o'clock you may believe i found a mournful house you
desire me to be very minute 

at my entrance into the court they were all in motion every servant
whom i saw had swelled eyes and looked with so much concern that at
first i apprehended some new disaster had happened in the family mr 
john and mr antony harlowe and mrs hervey were there they all helped
on one another's grief as they had before done each other's hardness of
heart 

my cousin james met me at the entrance of the hall his countenance
expressed a fixed concern and he desired me to excuse his behaviour the
last time i was there 

my cousin arabella came to me full of tears and grief 

o cousin said she hanging upon my arm i dare not ask you any
questions about the approach of the hearse i suppose she meant 

i myself was full of grief and without going farther or speaking sat
down in the hall in the first chair 

the brother sat on one hand of me the sister on the other both were
silent the latter in tears 

mr antony harlowe came to me soon after his face was overspread with
all the appearance of woe he requested me to walk into the parlour 
where as he said were all his fellow-mourners 

i attended him in my cousins james and arabella followed me 

a perfect concert of grief as i may say broke out the moment i entered
the parlour 

my cousin harlowe the dear creature's father as soon as he saw me 
said o cousin cousin of all our family you are the only one who have
nothing to reproach yourself with you are a happy man 

the poor mother bowing her head to me in speechless grief sat with her
handkerchief held to her eyes with one hand the other hand was held by
her sister hervey between both her's mrs hervey weeping upon it 

near the window sat mr john harlowe his face and his body turned from
the sorrowing company his eyes red and swelled 

my cousin antony at his re-entering the parlour went towards mrs 
harlowe don't dear sister said he then towards my cousin harlowe 
don't dear brother don't thus give way and without being able to
say another word went to a corner of the parlour and wanting himself
the comfort he would fain have given sunk into a chair and audibly
sobbed 

miss arabella followed her uncle antony as he walked in before me and
seemed as if she would have spoken to the pierced mother some words of
comfort but she was unable to utter them and got behind her mother's
chair and inclining her face over it on the unhappy lady's shoulder 
seemed to claim the consolation that indulgent parent used but then was
unable to afford her 

young mr harlowe with all his vehemence of spirit was now subdued 
his self-reproaching conscience no doubt was the cause of it 

and what sir must their thoughts be which at that moment in a
manner deprived them of all motion and turned their speech into sighs
and groans how to be pitied how greatly to be pitied all of them 
but how much to be cursed that abhorred lovelace who as it seems by
arts uncommon and a villany without example has been the sole author
of a woe so complicated and extensive god judge me as but i stop 
the man the man can i say is your friend he already suffers you
tell me in his intellect restore him heaven to that if i find the
matter come out as i apprehend it will indeed her own hint of his usage
of her as in her will is enough nor think my beloved cousin thou
darling of my heart that thy gentle spirit breathing charity and
forgiveness to the vilest of men shall avail him but once more i stop
 forgive me sir who could behold such a scene who could recollect it
in order to describe it as minutely as you wished me to relate how this
unhappy family were affected on this sad occasion every one of the
mourners nearly related to himself and not to be exasperated against the
author of all 

as i was the only person grieved as i was myself from whom any of them 
at that instant could derive comfort let us not said i my dear
cousin approaching the inconsolable mother give way to a grief which 
however just can now avail us nothing we hurt ourselves and cannot
recall the dear creature for whom we mourn nor would you wish it if
you know with what assurance of eternal happiness she left the world she
is happy madam depend upon it she is happy and comfort yourselves
with that assurance 

o cousin cousin cried the unhappy mother withdrawing her hand from
that of her sister hervey and pressing mine with it you know not what
a child i have lost then in a low voice and how lost that it is that
makes the loss insupportable 

they all joined in a kind of melancholy chorus and each accused him and
herself and some of them one another but the eyes of all in turn 
were cast upon my cousin james as the person who had kept up the general
resentment against so sweet a creature while he was hardly able to bear
his own remorse nor miss harlowe her's she breaking out into words how
tauntingly did i write to her how barbarously did i insult her yet
how patiently did she take it who would have thought that she had been
so near her end o brother brother but for you but for you double
not upon me said he my own woes i have every thing before me that has
passed i thought only to reclaim a dear creature that had erred i
intended not to break her tender heart but it was the villanous
lovelace who did that not any of us yet cousin did she not attribute
all to me i fear she did tell me only did she name me did she speak
of me in her last hours i hope she who could forgive the greatest
villain on earth and plead that he may be safe from our vengeance i
hope she could forgive me 

she died blessing you all and justified rather than condemned your
severity to her 

then they set up another general lamentation we see said her father 
enough we see in her heart-piercing letters to us what a happy frame
she was in a few days before her death but did it hold to the last had
she no repinings had the dear child no heart burnings 

none at all i never saw and never shall see so blessed a departure 
and no wonder for i never heard of such a preparation every hour for
weeks together were taken up in it let this be our comfort we need
only to wish for so happy an end for ourselves and for those who are
nearest to our hearts we may any of us be grieved for acts of
unkindness to her but had all happened that once she wished for she
could not have made a happier perhaps not so happy an end 

dear soul and dear sweet soul the father uncles sister my cousin
hervey cried out all at once in accents of anguish inexpressibly
affecting 

we must for every be disturbed for those acts of unkindness to so sweet a
child cried the unhappy mother indeed indeed  softly to her sister
hervey   i have been too passive much too passive in this case the
temporary quiet i have been so studious all my life to preserve has cost
me everlasting disquiet there she stopt 

dear sister was all mrs hervey could say 

i have done but half my duty to the dearest and most meritorious of
children resumed the sorrowing mother nay not half how have we
hardened our hearts against her again her tears denied passage to her
words 

my dearest dearest sister again was all mrs hervey could say 

would to heaven proceeded exclaiming the poor mother i had but once
seen her then turning to my cousin james and his sister o my son 
o my arabella if we were to receive as little mercy and there again she
stopt her tears interrupting her farther speech every one all the
time remaining silent their countenances showing a grief in their
hearts too big for expression 

now you see mr belford that my dearest cousin could be allowed all her
merit what a dreadful thing is after-reflection upon a conduct so
perverse and unnatural 

o this cursed friend of your's mr belford this detested lovelace to
him to him is owing 

pardon me sir i will lay down my pen till i have recovered my temper 


one in the morning 

in vain sir have i endeavoured to compose myself to rest you wished
me to be very particular and i cannot help it this melancholy subject
fills my whole mind i will proceed though it be midnight 

about six o'clock the hearse came to the outward gate the parish church
is at some distance but the wind setting fair the afflicted family were
struck just before it came into a fresh fit of grief on hearing the
funeral bell tolled in a very solemn manner a respect as it proved 
and as they all guessed paid to the memory of the dear deceased out of
officious love as the hearse passed near the church 

judge when their grief was so great in expectation of it what it must
be when it arrived 

a servant came in to acquaint us with what its lumbering heavy noise up
the paved inner court-yard apprized us of before he spoke not he
could not speak he looked bowed and withdrew 

i stept out no one else could then stir her brother however soon
followed me when i came to the door i beheld a sight very affecting 

you have heard sir how universally my dear cousin was beloved by the
poor and middling sort especially no young lady was ever so much
beloved and with reason she was the common patroness of all the honest
poor in her neighbourhood 

it is natural for us in every deep and sincere grief to interest all we
know in what is so concerning to ourselves the servants of the family 
it seems had told their friends and those their's that though living 
their dear young lady could not be received nor looked upon her body was
permitted to be brought home the space of time was so confined that
those who knew when she died must easily guess near the time the hearse
was to come a hearse passing through country villages and from
london however slenderly attended for the chariot as i have said 
waited upon poor mrs norton takes every one's attention nor was it
hard to guess whose this must be though not adorned by escutcheons when
the cross-roads to harlowe-place were taken as soon as it came within
six miles of it so that the hearse and the solemn tolling of the bell 
had drawn together at least fifty or the neighbouring men women and
children and some of good appearance not a soul of them it seems 
with a dry eye and each lamenting the death of this admired lady who 
as i am told never stirred out but somebody was the better for her 

these when the coffin was taken out of the hearse crowding about it 
hindered for a few moments its being carried in the young people
struggling who should bear it and yet with respectful whisperings 
rather than clamorous contention a mark of veneration i had never
before seen paid upon any occasion in all my travels from the
under-bred many from whom noise is generally inseparable in all their
emulations 

at last six maidens were permitted to carry it in by the six handles 

the corpse was thus borne with the most solemn respect into the hall 
and placed for the present upon two stools there the plates and
emblems and inscription set every one gazing upon it and admiring it 
the more when they were told that all was of her own ordering they
wished to be permitted a sight of the corpse but rather mentioned this
as their wish than as their hope when they had all satisfied their
curiosity and remarked upon the emblems they dispersed with blessings
upon her memory and with tears and lamentations pronouncing her to be
happy and inferring were she not so what would become of them while
others ran over with repetitions of the good she delighted to do nor
were there wanting those among them who heaped curses upon the man who
was the author of her fall 

the servants of the family then got about the coffin they could not
before and that afforded a new scene of sorrow but a silent one for
they spoke only by their eyes and by sighs looking upon the lid and
upon one another by turns with hands lifted up the presence of their
young master possibly might awe them and cause their grief to be
expressed only in dumb show 

as for mr james harlowe who accompanied me but withdrew when he saw
the crowd he stood looking upon the lid when the people had left it 
with a fixed attention yet i dare say knew not a symbol or letter upon
it at that moment had the question been asked him in a profound
reverie he stood his arms folded his head on one side and marks of
stupefaction imprinted upon every feature 

but when the corpse was carried into the lesser parlour adjoining to the
hall which she used to call her parlour and put upon a table in the
midst of the room and the father and mother the two uncles her aunt
hervey and her sister came in joining her brother and me with
trembling feet and eager woe the scene was still more affecting their
sorrow was heightened no doubt by the remembrance of their unforgiving
severity and now seeing before them the receptacle that contained the
glory of their family who so lately was driven thence by their
indiscreet violence never never more to be restored to the no wonder
that their grief was more than common grief 

they would have withheld the mother it seems from coming in but when
they could not though undetermined before they all bore her company 
led on by an impulse they could not resist the poor lady but just cast
her eye upon the coffin and then snatched it away retiring with
passionate grief towards the window yet addressing herself with
clasped hands as if to her beloved daughter o my child my child cried
she thou pride of my hope why was i not permitted to speak pardon and
peace to thee o forgive thy cruel mother 

her son his heart then softened as his eyes showed besought her to
withdraw and her woman looking in at that moment he called her to
assist him in conducting her lady into the middle parlour and then
returning met his father going out of the door who also had but just
cast his eye on the coffin and yielded to my entreaties to withdraw 
his grief was too deep for utterance till he saw his son coming in and
then fetching a heavy groan never said he was sorrow like my sorrow 
 o son son in a reproaching accent his face turned from him 

i attended him through the middle parlour endeavouring to console him 
his lady was there in agonies she took his eye he made a motion
towards her o my dear said he but turning short his eyes as full as
his heart he hastened through to the great parlour and when there he
desired me to leave him to himself 

the uncles and sister looked and turned away very often upon the
emblems in silent sorrow mrs hervey would have read to them the
inscription these words she did read here the wicked cease from
troubling but could read no farther her tears fell in large drops upon
the plate she was contemplating and yet she was desirous of gratifying a
curiosity that mingled impatience with her grief because she could not
gratify it although she often wiped her eyes as they flowed 

judge you mr belford for you have great humanity how i must be
affected yet was i forced to try to comfort them all 

but here i will close this letter in order to send it to you in the
morning early nevertheless i will begin another upon supposition that
my doleful prolixity will be disagreeable to you indeed i am altogether
indisposed for rest as i have mentioned before so can do nothing but
write i have also more melancholy scenes to paint my pen if i may
say so is untired these scenes are fresh upon my memory and i myself 
perhaps may owe to you the favour of a review of them with such other
papers as you shall think proper to oblige me with when heavy grief has
given way to milder melancholy 

my servant in his way to you with this letter shall call at st alban's
upon the good woman that he may inform you how she does miss arabella
asked me after her when i withdrew to my chamber to which she
complaisantly accompanied me she was much concerned at the bad way we
left her in and said her mother would be more so 

no wonder that the dear departed who foresaw the remorse that would fall
to the lot of this unhappy family when they came to have the news of her
death confirmed to them was so grieved for their apprehended grief and
endeavoured to comfort them by her posthumous letters but it was still
a greater generosity in her to try to excuse them to me as she did when
we were alone together a few hours before she died and to aggravate
more than as far as i can find she ought to have done the only error
she was ever guilty of the more freely however perhaps exalted
creature that i might think the better of her friends although at her
own expense i am dear sir 

your faithful and obedient servant 
wm morden 



letter xxvii

colonel morden
 in continuation  


when the unhappy mourners were all retired i directed the lid of the
coffin to be unscrewed and caused some fresh aromatics and flowers to
be put into it 

the corpse was very little altered notwithstanding the journey the
sweet smile remained 

the maids who brought the flowers were ambitious of strewing them about
it they poured forth fresh lamentations over her each wishing she had
been so happy as to have been allowed to attend her in london one of
them particularly who is it seems my cousin arabella's personal
servant was more clamorous in her grief than any of the rest and the
moment she turned her back all the others allowed she had reason for it 
i inquired afterwards about her and found that this creature was set
over my dear cousin when she was confined to her chamber by indiscreet
severity 

good heaven that they should treat and suffer thus to be treated a
young lady who was qualified to give laws to all her family 

when my cousins were told that the lid was unscrewed they pressed in
again all but the mournful father and mother as if by consent mrs 
hervey kissed her pale lips flower of the world was all she could say 
and gave place to miss arabella who kissing the forehead of her whom she
had so cruelly treated could only say to my cousin james looking upon
the corpse and upon him o brother while he taking the fair 
lifeless hand kissed it and retreated with precipitation 

her two uncles were speechless they seemed to wait each other's
example whether to look upon the corpse or not i ordered the lid to
be replaced and then they pressed forward as the others again did to
take a last farewell of the casket which so lately contained so rich a
jewel 

then it was that the grief of each found fluent expression and the fair
corpse was addressed to with all the tenderness that the sincerest love
and warmest admiration could inspire each according to their different
degrees of relationship as if none of them had before looked upon her 
she was their very niece both uncles said the injured saint her uncle
harlowe the same smiling sister arabella the dear creature all of
them the same benignity of countenance the same sweet composure the
same natural dignity she was questionless happy that sweet smile
betokened her being so themselves most unhappy and then once more 
the brother took the lifeless hand and vowed revenge upon it on the
cursed author of all this distress 

the unhappy parents proposed to take one last view and farewell of their
once darling daughter the father was got to the parlour-door after the
inconsolable mother but neither of them were able to enter it the
mother said she must once more see the child of her heart or she should
never enjoy herself but they both agreed to refer their melancholy
curiosity till the next day and had in hand retired inconsolable 
speechless both their faces overspread with woe and turned from each
other as unable each to behold the distress of the other 

when all were withdrawn i retired and sent for my cousin james and
acquainted him with his sister's request in relation to the discourse to
be pronounced at her interment telling him how necessary it was that the
minister whoever he were should have the earliest notice given him that
the case would admit he lamented the death of the reverend dr lewen 
who as he said was a great admirer of his sister as she was of him 
and would have been the fittest of all men for that office he spoke
with great asperity of mr brand upon whose light inquiry after his
sister's character in town he was willing to lay some of the blame due to
himself mr melvill dr lewen's assistant must he said be the man 
and he praised him for his abilities his elocution and unexceptionable
manners and promised to engage him early in the morning 

he called out his sister and he was of his opinion so i let this upon
them 

they both with no little warmth hinted their disapprobation of you 
sir for their sister's executor on the score of your intimate
friendship with the author of her ruin 

you must not resent any thing i shall communicate to you of what they say
on this occasion depending that you will not i shall write with the
greater freedom 

i told them how much my dear cousin was obliged to your friendship and
humanity the injunctions she had laid you under and your own
inclination to observe them i said that you were a man of honour that
you were desirous of consulting me because you would not willingly give
offence to any of them and that i was very fond of cultivating your
favour and correspondence 

they said there was no need of an executor out of their family and they
hoped that you would relinquish so unnecessary a trust as they called
it my cousin james declared that he would write to you as soon as the
funeral was over to desire that you would do so upon proper assurances
that all the will prescribed should be performed 

i said you were a man of resolution that i thought he would hardly
succeed for that you made a point of honour of it 

i then showed them their sister's posthumous letter to you in which she
confesses her obligations to you and regard for you and for your future
welfare you may believe sir they were extremely affected with the
perusal of it 


 see letter xii of this volume 


they were surprised that i had given up to you the produce of her
grandfather's estate since his death i told them plainly that they must
thank themselves if any thing disagreeable to them occurred from their
sister's devise deserted and thrown into the hands of strangers as she
had been 

they said they would report all i had said to their father and mother 
adding that great as their trouble was they found they had still more
to come but if mr belford were to be the executor of her will 
contrary to their hopes they besought me to take the trouble of
transacting every thing with you that a friend of the man to whom they
owed all their calamity might not appear to them 

they were extremely moved at the text their sister had chosen for the
subject of their funeral discourse i had extracted from the will that
article supposing it probable that i might not so soon have an
opportunity to show them the will itself as would otherwise have been
necessary on account of the interment which cannot be delayed 


 see the will in pg 112 of this volume 



monday morning between eight and nine 

the unhappy family are preparing for a mournful meeting at breakfast 
mr james harlowe who has had as little rest as i has written to mr 
melvill who has promised to draw up a brief eulogium on the deceased 
miss howe is expected here by-and-by to see for the last time her
beloved friend 

miss howe by her messenger desires she may not be taken any notice of 
she shall not tarry six minutes was the word her desire will be easily
granted her 

her servant who brought the request if it were denied was to return 
and meet her for she was ready to set out in her chariot when he got on
horseback 

if he met her not with the refusal he was to say here till she came i
am sir 

your faithful humble servant 
william morden 



letter xxviii

colonel morden
 in continuation  
monday afternoon sept 11 


sir 

we are such bad company here to one another that it is some relief to
retire and write 

i was summoned to breakfast about half an hour after nine slowly did
the mournful congress meet each lifelessly and spiritless took our
places with swoln eyes inquiring without expecting any tolerable
account how each had rested 

the sorrowing mother gave for answer that she should never more know
what rest was 

by the time we were well seated the bell ringing the outward gate
opening a chariot rattling over the pavement of the court-yard put them
into emotion 

i left them and was just time enough to give miss howe my hand as she
alighted her maid in tears remaining in the chariot 

i think you told me sir you never saw miss howe she is a fine 
graceful young lady a fixed melancholy on her whole aspect overclouded
a vivacity and fire which nevertheless darted now-and-then through the
awful gloom i shall ever respect her for her love to my dear cousin 

never did i think said she as she gave me her hand to enter more these
doors but living or dead clarissa brings me after her any where 

she entered with me the little parlour and seeing the coffin withdrew
her hand from mine and with impatience pushed aside the lid as
impatiently she removed the face-cloth in a wild air she clasped her
uplifted hands together and now looked upon the corpse now up to
heaven as if appealing to that her bosom heaved and fluttered
discernible through her handkerchief and at last she broke silence o
sir see you not here the glory of her sex thus by the most
villanous of yours thus laid low 

o my blessed friend said she my sweet companion my lovely monitress 
 kissing her lips at every tender appellation and is this all is it
all of my clarissa's story 

then after a short pause and a profound sigh she turned to me and
then to her breathless friend but is she can she be really dead o
no she only sleeps awake my beloved friend my sweet clay-cold
friend awake let thy anna howe revive thee by her warm breath revive
thee my dear creature and kissing her again let my warm lips animate
thy cold ones 

then sighing again as from the bottom of her heart and with an air as
if disappointed that she answered not and can such perfection end thus 
 and art thou really and indeed flown from thine anna howe o my unkind
clarissa 

she was silent a few moments and then seeming to recover herself she
turned to me forgive forgive mr morden this wild phrensy i am
myself i never shall be you knew not the excellence no not half the
excellence that is thus laid low repeating this cannot surely be
all of my clarissa's story 

again pausing one tear my beloved friend didst thou allow me but
this dumb sorrow o for a tear to ease my full-swoln heart that is just
bursting 

but why sir why mr morden was she sent hither why not to me she
has no father no mother no relation no not one they had all
renounced her i was her sympathizing friend and had not i the best
right to my dear creature's remains and must names without nature be
preferred to such a love as mine 

again she kissed her lips each cheek her forehead and sighed as if
her heart would break 

but why why said she was i withheld from seeing my dearest dear
friend and too easily persuaded to delay the friendly visit that my
heart panted after what pain will this reflection give me o my blessed
friend who knows who knows had i come in time what my cordial
comfortings might have done for thee but looking round her as if she
apprehended seeing some of the family one more kiss my angel my
friend my ever-to-be-regretted lost companion and let me fly this
hated house which i never loved but for thy sake adieu then my
dearest clarissa thou art happy i doubt not as thou assuredst me in
thy last letter o may we meet and rejoice together where no villanous
lovelaces no hard-hearted relations will ever shock our innocence or
ruffle our felicity 

again she was silent unable to go though seeming to intend it 
struggling as it were with her grief and heaving with anguish at
last happily a flood of tears gushed from her eyes now now said
she shall i shall i be easier but for this kindly relief my heart
would have burst asunder more many more tears than these are due to my
clarissa whose counsel has done for me what mine could not do for her 
but why looking earnestly upon her her hands clasped and lifted up but
why do i thus lament the happy and that thou art so is my comfort it
is it is my dear creature kissing her again 

excuse me sir  turning to me who was as much moved as herself   i
loved the dear creature as never woman loved another excuse my frantic
grief how has the glory of her sex fallen a victim to villany and to
hard-heartedness 

madam said i they all have it now indeed they have it 

and let them have it i should belie my love for the friend of my heart 
were i to pity them but how unhappy am i  looking upon her  that i saw
her not before these eyes were shut before these lips were for ever
closed o sir you know not the wisdom that continually flowed from
these lips when she spoke nor what a friend i have lost 

then surveying the lid she seemed to take in at once the meaning of the
emblems and this gave her so much fresh grief that though she several
times wipes her eyes she was unable to read the inscription and texts 
turning therefore to me favour me sir i pray you by a line with
the description of these emblems and with these texts and if i might be
allowed a lock of the dear creature's hair 

i told her that her executor would order both and would also send her a
copy of her last will in which she would find the most grateful
remembrances of her love for her whom she calls the sister of her heart 

justly said she does she call me so for we had but one heart but one
soul between us and now my better half is torn from me what shall i
do 

but looking round her on a servant's stepping by the door as if again
she had apprehended it was some of the family once more said she a
solemn an everlasting adieu alas for me a solemn an everlasting
adieu 

then again embracing her face with both her hands and kissing it and
afterwards the hands of the dear deceased first one then the other she
gave me her hand and quitting the room with precipitation rushed into
her chariot and when there with profound sight and a fresh burst of
tears unable to speak she bowed her head to me and was driven away 

the inconsolable company saw how much i had been moved on my return to
them mr james harlowe had been telling them what had passed between
him and me and finding myself unfit for company and observing that
they broke off talk at my coming in i thought it proper to leave them to
their consultations 

and here i will put an end to this letter for indeed sir the very
recollection of this affecting scene has left me nearly as unable to
proceed as i was just after it to converse with my cousins i am 
sir with great truth 

your most obedient humble servant 
william morden 



letter xxix

colonel morden
 in continuation  
tuesday morning sept 12 


the good mrs norton is arrived a little amended in her spirits owing
to the very posthumous letters as i may call them which you mr 
belford as well as i apprehended would have had fatal effects upon her 

i cannot but attribute this to the right turn of her mind it seems she
has been inured to afflictions and has lived in a constant hope of a
better life and having no acts of unkindness to the dear deceased to
reproach herself with is most considerately resolved to exert her utmost
fortitude in order to comfort the sorrowing mother 

o mr belford how does the character of my dear departed cousin rise
upon me from every mouth had she been my own child or my sister but
do you think that the man who occasioned this great this extended ruin 
but i forbear 

the will is not to be looked into till the funeral rites are performed 
preparations are making for the solemnity and the servants as well as
principals of all the branches of the family are put into close
mourning 

i have seen mr melvill he is a serious and sensible man i have given
him particulars to go upon in the discourse he is to pronounce at the
funeral but had the less need to do this as i find he is extremely well
acquainted with the whole unhappy story and was a personal admirer of my
dear cousin and a sincere lamenter of her misfortunes and death the
reverend dr lewen who is but very lately dead was his particular
friend and had once intended to recommend him to her favour and notice 


 


i am just returned from attending the afflicted parents in an effort
they made to see the corpse of their beloved child they had requested
my company and that of the good mrs norton a last leave the mother
said she must take 

an effort however it was and no more the moment they came in sight
of the coffin before the lid could be put aside o my dear said the
father retreating i cannot i find i cannot bear it had i had i had
i never been hard-hearted then turning round to his lady he had but
just time to catch her in his arms and prevent her sinking on the floor 
 o my dearest life said he this is too much too much indeed let
us let us retire mrs norton who attracted by the awful receptacle 
had but just left the good lady hastened to her dear dear woman cried
the unhappy parent flinging her arms about her neck bear me bear me
hence o my child my child my own clarissa harlowe thou pride of my
life so lately never never more must i behold thee 

i supported the unhappy father mrs norton the sinking mother into the
next parlour she threw herself on a settee there he into an
elbow-chair by her the good woman at her feet her arms clasped round
her waist the two mothers i as may call them of my beloved cousin 
thus tenderly engaged what a variety of distress in these woeful
scenes 

the unhappy father in endeavouring to comfort his lady loaded himself 
would to god my dear said he would to god i had no more to charge
myself with than you have you relented you would have prevailed upon
me to relent 

the greater my fault said she when i knew that displeasure was carried
too high to acquiesce as i did what a barbarous parent was i to let
two angry children make me forget that i was mother to a third to such a
third 

mrs norton used arguments and prayers to comfort her o my dear norton 
answered the unhappy lady you was the dear creature's more natural
mother would to heaven i had no more to answer for than you have 

thus the unhappy pair unavailingly recriminated till my cousin hervey
entered and with mrs norton conducted up to her own chamber the
inconsolable mother the two uncles and mr hervey came in at the same
time and prevailed upon the afflicted father to retire with them to his
 both giving up all thoughts of ever seeing more the child whose death
was so deservedly regretted by them 

time only mr belford can combat with advantage such a heavy
deprivation as this advice will not do while the loss is recent 
nature will have way given to it and so it ought till sorrow has in a
manner exhausted itself and then reason and religion will come in
seasonably with their powerful aids to raise the drooping heart 

i see here no face that is the same i saw at my first arrival proud and
haughty every countenance then unyielding to entreaty now how greatly
are they humbled the utmost distress is apparent in every protracted
feature and in every bursting muscle of each disconsolate mourner 
their eyes which so lately flashed anger and resentment now are turned
to every one that approaches them as if imploring pity could ever
wilful hard-heartedness be more severely punished 

the following lines of juvenal are upon the whole applicable to this
house and family and i have revolved them many times since sunday
evening 

 humani generis mores tibi nosse volenti
 sufficit una domus paucos consumere dies and
 dicere te miserum postquam illinc veneris aude 

let me add that mrs norton has communicated to the family the
posthumous letter sent her this letter affords a foundation for future
consolation to them but at present it has new pointed their grief by
making them reflect on their cruelty to so excellent a daughter niece 
and sister i am dear sir 

your faithful humble servant 
wm morden 


 this letter contains in substance her thanks to the good woman for her
care of her in her infancy for her good instructions and the excellent
example she had set her with self-accusations of a vanity and
presumption which lay lurking in her heart unknown to herself till her
calamities obliging her to look into herself brought them to light 

she expatiates upon the benefit of afflictions to a mind modest fearful 
and diffident 

she comforts her on her early death having finished as she says her
probatory course at so early a time of life when many are not ripened
by the sunshine of divine grace for a better till they are fifty sixty 
or seventy years of age 

i hope she says that my father will grant the request i have made to
him in my last will to let you pass the remainder of your days at my
dairy-house as it used to be called where once i promised myself to be
happy in you your discretion prudence and economy my dear good
woman proceeds she will male your presiding over the concerns of that
house as beneficial to them as it can be convenient to you for your
sake my dear mrs norton i hope they will make you this offer and if
they do i hope you will accept it for theirs 

she remembers herself to her foster-brother in a very kind manner and
charges her for his sake that she will not take too much to heart what
has befallen her 

she concludes as follows 

remember me in the last place to all my kind well-wishers of your
acquaintance and to those i used to call my poor they will be god's
poor if they trust in him i have taken such care that i hope they
will not be losers by my death bid them therefore rejoice and do you
also my reverend comforter and sustainer as well in my darker as in my
fairer days likewise rejoice that i am so soon delivered from the
evils that were before me and that i am now when this comes to your
hands as i humbly trust exulting in the mercies of a gracious god who
has conducted an end to all my temptations and distresses and who i
most humbly trust will in his own good time give us a joyful meeting
in the regions of eternal blessedness 



letter xxx

colonel morden
 in continuation  
thursday night sept 14 


we are just returned from the solemnization of the last mournful rite 
my cousin james and his sister mr and mrs hervey and their daughter 
a young lady whose affection for my departed cousin shall ever bind me to
her my cousins john and antony harlowe myself and some other more
distant relations of the names of fuller and allinson who to testify
their respect to the memory of the dear deceased had put themselves in
mourning self-invited attended it 

the father and mother would have joined in these last honours had they
been able but they were both very much indisposed and continue to be
so 

the inconsolable mother told mrs norton that the two mothers of the
sweetest child in the world ought not on this occasion to be separated 
she therefore desired her to stay with her 

the whole solemnity was performed with great decency and order the
distance from harlowe-place to the church is about half a mile all the
way the corpse was attended by great numbers of people of all conditions 

it was nine when it entered the church every corner of which was
crowded such a profound such a silent respect did i never see paid at
the funeral of princes an attentive sadness overspread the face of all 

the eulogy pronounced by mr melvill was a very pathetic one he wiped
his own eyes often and made every body present still oftener wipe
theirs 

the auditors were most particularly affected when he told them that the
solemn text was her own choice 

he enumerated her fine qualities naming with honour their late worthy
pastor for his authority 

every enumerated excellence was witnessed to in different parts of the
church in respectful whispers by different persons as of their own
knowledge as i have been since informed 

when he pointed to the pew where doing credit to religion by her
example she used to sit or kneel the whole auditory as one person 
turned to the pew with the most respectful solemnity as if she had been
herself there 

when the gentleman attributed condescension and mingled dignity to her 
a buzzing approbation was given to the attribute throughout the church 
and a poor neat woman under my pew added that she was indeed all
graciousness and would speak to any body 

many eyes ran over when he mentioned her charities her well-judged
charities and her reward was decreed from every mouth with sighs and
sobs from some and these words from others the poor will dearly miss
her 

the cheerful giver whom god is said to love was allowed to be her and
a young lady i am told said it was miss clarissa harlowe's care to
find out the unhappy upon a sudden distress before the sighing heart
was overwhelmed by it 

she had a set of poor people chosen for their remarkable honesty and
ineffectual industry these voluntarily paid their last attendance on
their benefactress and mingling in the church as they could crowd near
the aisle where the corpse was on stands it was the less wonder that her
praises from the preacher met with such general and such grateful
whispers of approbation 

some it seems there were who knowing her unhappy story remarked upon
the dejected looks of the brother and the drowned eyes of the sister 
o what would they now give they'd warrant had they not been so
hard-hearted  others pursued as i may say the severe father and
unhappy mother into their chambers at home they answered for their
relenting now that it was too late what must be their grief no
wonder they could not be present 

several expressed their astonishment as people do every hour that a
man could live whom such perfections could not engage to be just to her 
 to be humane i may say and who her rank and fortune considered 
could be so disregardful of his own interest had he had no other motive
to be just 

the good divine led by his text just touched upon the unhappy step that
was the cause of her untimely fate he attributed it to the state of
things below in which there could not be absolute perfection he very
politely touched upon the noble disdain she showed though earnestly
solicited by a whole splendid family to join interests with a man whom
she found unworthy of her esteem and confidence and who courted her with
the utmost earnestness to accept of him 

what he most insisted upon was the happy end she made and thence drew
consolation to her relations and instruction to the auditory 

in a word his performance was such as heightened the reputation which he
had before in a very eminent degree obtained 

when the corpse was to be carried down into the vault a very spacious
one within the church there was great crowding to see the coffin-lid 
and the devices upon it particularly two gentlemen muffled up in
clokes pressed forward these it seems were mr mullins and mr 
wyerley both of them professed admirers of my dear cousin 

when they came near the coffin and cast their eyes upon the lid in
that little space  said mr mullins is included all human excellence 
 and then mr wyerley unable to contain himself was forced to quit the
church and we hear is very ill 

it is said that mr solmes was in a remote part of the church wrapped
round in a horseman's coat and that he shed tears several times but i
saw him not 

another gentleman was there incognito in a pew near the entrance of the
vault who had not been taken notice of but for his great emotion when
he looked over his pew at the time the coffin was carried down to its
last place this was miss howe's worthy mr hickman 

my cousins john and antony and their nephew james chose not to descend
into the vault among their departed ancestors 

miss harlowe was extremely affected her conscience as well as her
love was concerned on the occasion she would go down with the corpse
of her dear her only sister she said but her brother would not permit
it and her overwhelmed eye pursued the coffin till she could see no
more of it and then she threw herself on the seat and was near fainting
away 

i accompanied it down that i might not only satisfy myself but you 
sir her executor that it was deposited as she had directed at the
feet of her grandfather 

mr melvill came down contemplated the lid and shed a few tears over
it i was so well satisfied with his discourse and behaviour that i
presented him on the solemn spot with a ring of some value and thanked
him for his performance 

and here i left the remains of my beloved cousin having bespoken my own
place by the side of her coffin 

on my return to harlowe-place i contented myself with sending my
compliments to the sorrowing parents and retired to my chamber nor am
i ashamed to own that i could not help giving way to a repeated fit of
humanity as soon as i entered it i am sir 

your most faithful and obedient servant 
wm morden 


p s you will have a letter from my cousin james who hopes to prevail
 upon you to relinquish the executorship it has not my
 encouragement 



letter xxxi

mr belford to william morden esq 
saturday sept 16 


dear sir 

i once had thoughts to go down privately in order disguised to see the
last solemnity performed but there was no need to give myself this
melancholy trouble since your last letter so naturally describes all
that passed that i have every scene before my eyes 

you crowd me sir methinks into the silent slow procession now with
the sacred bier do i enter the awful porch now measure i with solemn
paces the venerable aisle now ambitious of a relationship to her 
placed in a pew near to the eye-attracting coffin do i listen to the
moving eulogy now through the buz of gaping eye-swoln crowds do i
descend into the clammy vault as a true executor to see that part of
her will performed with my own eyes there with a soul filled with
musing do i number the surrounding monuments of mortality and
contemplate the present stillness of so many once busy vanities crowded
all into one poor vaulted nook as if the living grudged room for the
corpse of those for which when animated the earth the air and the
waters could hardly find room then seeing her placed at the feet of
him whose earthly delight she was and who as i find ascribes to the
pleasure she gave him the prolongation of his own life sighing and
with averted face i quit the solemn mansion the symbolic coffin and 
for ever the glory of her sex and ascend with those who in a few
years after a very short blaze of life will fill up other spaces of the
same vault which now while they mourn only for her whom they jointly
persecuted they press with their feet 


 see vol i letter v 


nor do your affecting descriptions permit me here to stop but ascended 
i mingle my tears and my praises with those of the numerous spectators 
i accompany the afflicted mourners back to their uncomfortable mansion 
and make one in the general concert of unavailing woe till retiring as i
imagine as they retire like them in reality i give up to new scenes
of solitary and sleepless grief reflecting upon the perfections i have
seen the end of and having no relief but from an indignation which
makes me approve of the resentments of others against the unhappy man 
and those equally unhappy relations of her's to whom the irreparable
loss is owing 

forgive me sir these reflections and permit me with this to send you
what you declined receiving till the funeral was over 


 he gives him then an account of the money and effects which he sends
 him down by this opportunity for the legatees at harlowe-place 
 and in its neighbourhood which he desires him to dispose of
 according to the will 

he also sends him an account of other steps he has taken in pursuance of
 the will and desires to know if mr harlowe expects the discharge
 of the funeral-expenses from the effects in his hands and the
 re-imbursement of the sums advanced to the testatrix since her
 grandfather's death  


these expeditious proceedings says he will convince mr james harlowe
that i am resolved to see the will completely executed and yet by my
manner of doing it that i desire not to give unnecessary mortification
to the family since every thing that relates to them shall pass through
your hands 



letter xxxii

mr james harlowe to john belford esq 
harlowe-place friday night sept 15 


sir 

i hope from the character my worthy cousin morden gives you that you
will excuse the application i make to you to oblige a whole family in
an affair that much concerns their peace and cannot equally concern any
body else you will immediately judge sir that this is the
executorship of which my sister has given you the trouble by her last
will 

we shall all think ourselves extremely obliged to you if you please to
relinquish this trust to our own family the reasons which follow
pleading for our own expectation of this favour from you 

first because she never would have had the thought of troubling you 
sir if she had believed any of her near relations would have taken it
upon themselves 

secondly i understand that she recommends to you in the will to trust
to the honour of any of our family for the performance of such of the
articles as are of a domestic nature we are any of us and all of us 
if you request it willing to stake our honours upon this occasion and
all you can desire as a man of honour is that the trust be executed 

we are the more concerned sir to wish you to decline this office 
because of your short and accidental knowledge of the dear testatrix and
long and intimate acquaintance with the man to whom she owed her ruin 
and we the greatest loss and disappointment her manifold excellencies
considered that ever befell a family 

you will allow due weight i dare say to this plea if you make our case
your own and so much the readier when i assure you that your
interfering in this matter so much against our inclinations excuse 
sir my plain dealing will very probably occasion an opposition in some
points where otherwise there might be none 

what therefore i propose is not that my father should assume this
trust he is too much afflicted to undertake it nor yet myself i might
be thought too much concerned in interest but that it might be allowed
to devolve upon my two uncles whose known honour and whose affection to
the dear deceased nobody every doubted and they will treat with you 
sir through my cousin morden as to the points they will undertake to
perform 

the trouble you have already had will well entitle you to the legacy she
bequeaths you together with the re-imbursement of all the charges you
have been at and allowance of the legacies you have discharged although
you should not have qualified yourself to act as an executor as i
presume you have not yet done nor will now do 

your compliance sir will oblige a family who have already distress
enough upon them in the circumstance that occasions this application to
you and more particularly sir 

your most humble servant 
james harlowe jun 


i send this by one of my servants who will attend your dispatch 



letter xxxiii

mr belford to mr james harlowe jun esq 
saturday sept 16 


sir 

you will excuse my plain-dealing in turn for i must observe that if i
had not the just opinion i have of the sacred nature of this office i
have undertaken some passages in the letter you have favoured me with
would convince me that i ought not to excuse myself from acting in it 

i need only name one of them you are pleased to say that your uncles 
if the trust be relinquished to them will treat with me through colonel
morden as to the points they will undertake to perform 

permit me sir to say that it is the duty of an executor to see every
point performed that can be performed nor will i leave the performance
of mine to any other persons especially where a qualifying is so
directly intimated and where all the branches of your family have shown
themselves with respect to the incomparable lady to have but one mind 

you are pleased to urge that she recommends to me the leaving to the
honour of any of your family such of the articles as are of a domestic
nature but admitting this to be so does it not imply that the other
articles are still to obtain my care but even these you will find by
the will she gives not up and to that i refer you 

i am sorry for the hints you give of an opposition where as you say 
there might be none if i did not interfere i see not sir why your
animosity against a man who cannot be defended should be carried to such
a height against one who never gave you offence and this only because
he is acquainted with that man i will not say all i might say on this
occasion 

as to the legacy to myself i assure you sir that neither my
circumstances nor my temper will put me upon being a gainer by the
executorship i shall take pleasure to tread in the steps of the
admirable testatrix in all i may and rather will increase than diminish
her poor's fund 

with regard to the trouble that may attend the execution of the trust i
shall not in honour to her memory value ten times more than this can
give me i have indeed two other executorships on my hands but they
sit light upon me and survivors cannot better or more charitably bestow
their time 

i conceive that every article but that relating to the poor's fund 
 such is the excellence of the disposition of the most excellent of
women may be performed in two months' time at farthest 

occasions of litigation or offence shall not proceed from me you need
only apply to colonel morden who shall command me in every thing that the
will allows me to oblige your family in i do assure you that i am as
unwilling to obtrude myself upon it as any of it can wish 

i own that i have not yet proved the will nor shall i do it till next
week at soonest that you may have time for amicable objections if such
you think fit to make through the colonel's mediation but let me
observe to you sir that an executor's power in such instances as i
have exercised it is the same before the probate as after it he can
even without taking that out commence an action although he cannot
declare upon it and these acts of administration make him liable to
actions himself  i am therefore very proper in the steps i shall have
taken in part of the execution of this sacred trust and want not
allowance on the occasion 

permit me to add that when you have perused the will and coolly
considered every thing it is my hope that you will yourself be of
opinion that there can be no room for dispute or opposition and that if
your family will join to expedite the execution it will be the most
natural and easy way of shutting up the whole affair and to have done
with a man so causelessly as to his own particular the object of your
dislike as is sir 

your very humble servant notwithstanding 
john belford 



the will

to which the following preamble written on a separate paper was
stitched in black silk 


to my executor

i hope i may be excused for expatiating in divers parts of this solemn
last act upon subjects of importance for i have heard of so many
instances of confusion and disagreement in families and so much doubt
and difficulty for want of absolute clearness in the testaments of
departed persons that i have often concluded were there to be no other
reasons but those which respect the peace of surviving friends that
this last act as to its designation and operation ought not to be the
last in its composition or making but should be the result of cool
deliberation and as is more frequently than justly said of a sound
mind and memory which too seldom are to be met with but in sound health 
all pretences of insanity of mind are likewise prevented when a testator
gives reasons for what he wills all cavils about words are obviated the
obliged are assured and they enjoy the benefit for whom the benefit was
intended hence have i for some time past employed myself in penning
down heads of such a disposition which as reasons offered i have
altered and added to so that i was never absolutely destitute of a will 
had i been taken off ever so suddenly these minutes and imperfect
sketches enabled me as god has graciously given me time and sedateness 
to digest them into the form in which they appear 


i clarissa harlowe now by strange melancholy accidents lodging in the
parish of st paul covent-garden being of sound and perfect mind and
memory as i hope these presents drawn up by myself and written with my
own hand will testify do  this second day of september   in the year
of our lord make and publish this my last will and testament in
manner and form following 


 a blank at the writing was left for this date and filled up on this
day see vol viii letter li 
 the date of the year is left blank for particular reasons 


in the first place i desire that my body may lie unburied three days
after my decease or till the pleasure of my father be known concerning
it but the occasion of my death not admitting of doubt i will not on
any account that it be opened and it is my desire that it shall not be
touched but by those of my own sex 

i have always earnestly requested that my body might be deposited in the
family vault with those of my ancestors if it might be granted i could
now wish that it might be placed at the feet of my dear and honoured
grandfather but as i have by one very unhappy step been thought to
disgrace my whole lineage and therefore this last honour may be refused
to my corpse in this case my desire is that it may be interred in the
churchyard belonging to the parish in which i shall die and that in the
most private manner between the hours of eleven and twelve at night 
attended only by mrs lovick and mr and mrs smith and their maid
servant 

but it is my desire that the same fees and dues may be paid which are
usually paid for those who are laid in the best ground as it is called 
or even in the chancel and i bequeath five pounds to be given at the
discretion of the church-wardens to twenty poor people the sunday after
my interment and this whether i shall be buried here or elsewhere 

i have already given verbal directions that after i am dead and laid
out in the manner i have ordered i may be put into my coffin as soon as
possible it is my desire that i may not be unnecessarily exposed to the
view of any body except any of my relations should vouchsafe for the
last time to look upon me 

and i could wish if it might be avoided without making ill will between
mr lovelace and my executor that the former might not be permitted to
see my corpse but if as he is a man very uncontroulable and as i am
nobody's he insist upon viewing her dead whom he once before saw in a
manner dead let his gay curiosity be gratified let him behold and
triumph over the wretched remains of one who has been made a victim to
his barbarous perfidy but let some good person as by my desire give
him a paper whist he is viewing the ghastly spectacle containing these
few words only gay cruel heart behold here the remains of the once
ruined yet now happy clarissa harlowe see what thou thyself must
quickly be and repent 

yet to show that i die in perfect charity with all the world i do most
sincerely forgive mr lovelace the wrongs he has done me 

if my father can pardon the errors of his unworthy child so far as to
suffer her corpse to be deposited at the feet of her grandfather as
above requested i could wish my misfortunes being so notorious that a
short discourse be pronounced over my remains before they be interred 
the subject of the discourse i shall determine before i conclude this
writing 


so much written about what deserves not the least consideration and
 about what will be nothing when this writing comes to be opened
 and read will be excused when my present unhappy circumstances
 and absence from all my natural friends are considered 


and now with regard to the worldly matters which i shall die possessed
of as well as to those which of right appertain to me either by the
will of my said grandfather or otherwise thus do i dispose of them 

in the first place i give and bequeath all the real estates in or to
which i have any claim or title by the said will to my ever-honoured
father james harlowe esq and that rather than to my brother and
sister to whom i had once thoughts of devising them because if they
survive my father those estates will assuredly vest in them or one of
them by virtue of his favour and indulgence as the circumstances of
things with regard to marriage-settlements or otherwise may require 
or as they may respectively merit by the continuance of their duty 

the house late my grandfather's called the grove and by him in honour
of me and of some of my voluntary employments my dairy-house and the
furniture thereof as it now stands the pictures and large iron chest of
old plate excepted i also bequeath to my said father only begging it
as a favour that he will be pleased to permit my dear mrs norton to pass
the remainder of her days in that house and to have and enjoy the
apartments in it known by the name of the housekeeper's apartments with
the furniture in them and which plain and neat was bought for me by
my grandfather who delighted to call me his house-keeper and which 
therefore in his life-time i used as such the office to go with the
apartments and as i am the more earnest in this recommendation as i
had once thought to have been very happy there with the good woman and
because i think her prudent management will be as beneficial to my
father as his favour can be convenient to her 

but with regard to what has accrued from that estate since my
grandfather's death and to the sum of nine hundred and seventy pounds 
which proved to be the moiety of the money that my said grandfather had
by him at his death and which moiety he bequeathed to me for my sole
and separate use  as he did the other moiety in like manner to my
sister   and which sum that i might convince my brother and sister that
i wished not for an independence upon my father's pleasure i gave into
my father's hands together with the management and produce of the whole
estate devised to me these sums however considerable when put together 
i hope i may be allowed to dispose of absolutely as my love and
gratitude not confined only to my own family which is very wealthy in
all its branches may warrant and which therefore i shall dispose of in
the manner hereafter mentioned but it is my will and express direction 
that my father's account of the above-mentioned produce may be taken and
established absolutely and without contravention or question as he
shall be pleased to give it to my cousin morden or to whom else he shall
choose to give it so as that the said account be not subject to
litigation or to the controul of my executor or of any other person 


 see vol i letter xiii 


my father of his love and bounty was pleased to allow me the same
quarterly sums that he allowed my sister for apparel and other
requisites and pleased with me then used to say that those sums
should not be deducted from the estate and effects bequeathed to me by my
grandfather but having mortally offended him as i fear it may be said 
by one unhappy step it may be expected that he will reimburse himself
those sums it is therefore my will and direction that he shall be
allowed to pay and satisfy himself for all such quarterly or other sums 
which he was so good as to advance me from the time of my grandfather's
death and that his account of such sums shall likewise be taken without
questioning the money however which i left behind me in my escritoire 
being to be taken in part of those disbursements 

my grandfather who in his goodness and favour to me knew no bounds 
was pleased to bequeath to me all the family pictures at his late house 
some of which are very masterly performances with command that if i
died unmarried or if married and had no descendants they should then go
to that son of his if more than one should be then living whom i should
think would set most value by them now as i know that my honoured
uncle mr john harlowe esq was pleased to express some concern that
they were not left to him as eldest son and as he has a gallery where
they may be placed to advantage and as i have reason to believe that he
will bequeath them to my father if he survive him who no doubt will
leave them to my brother i therefore bequeath all the said family
pictures to my said uncle john harlowe in these pictures however i
include not one of my own drawn when i was about fourteen years of age 
which i shall hereafter in another article bequeath 

my said honoured grandfather having a great fondness for the old family
plate which he would never permit to be changed having lived as he
used to day to see a great deal of it come into request again in the
revolution of fashions and having left the same to me with a command
to keep it entire and with power at my death to bequeath it to
whomsoever i pleased that i thought would forward his desire which was 
as he expresses it that it should be kept to the end of time this
family plate which is deposited in a large iron chest in the strong
room at his late dwelling-house i bequeath entire to my honoured uncle
antony harlowe esq with the same injunctions which were laid on me not
doubting but he will confirm and strengthen them by his own last will 

i bequeath to my ever-valued friend mrs judith norton to whose piety
and care seconding the piety and care of my ever-honoured and excellent
mother i owe morally speaking the qualifications which for eighteen
years of my life made me beloved and respected the full sum of six
hundred pounds to be paid her within three months after my death 

i bequeath also to the same good woman thirty guineas for mourning for
her and for her son my foster-brother 

to mrs dorothy hervey the only sister of my honoured mother i bequeath
the sum of fifty guineas for a ring and i beg of her to accept of my
thankful acknowledgements for all her goodness to me from my infancy and
particularly for her patience with me in the several altercations that
happened between my brother and sister and me before my unhappy
departure from harlowe-place 

to my kind and much valued cousin miss dolly hervey daughter of my aunt
hervey i bequeath my watch and equipage and my best mechlin and
brussels head-dresses and ruffles also my gown and petticoat of flowered
silver of my own work which having been made up but a few days before i
was confined to my chamber i never wore 

to the same young lady i bequeath likewise my harpsichord my
chamber-organ and all my music-books 

as my sister has a very pretty library and as my beloved miss howe has
also her late father's as well as her own i bequeath all my books in
general with the cases they are in to my said cousin dolly hervey as
they are not ill-chosen for a woman's library i know that she will take
the greater pleasure in them when her friendly grief is mellowed by
time into a remembrance more sweet than painful because they were mine 
and because there are observations in many of them of my own writing and
some very judicious ones written by the truly reverend dr lewen 

i also bequeath to the same young lady twenty-five guineas for a ring to
be worn in remembrance of her true friend 

if i live not to see my worthy cousin william morden esq i desire my
humble and grateful thanks may be given to him for his favours and
goodness to me and particularly for his endeavours to reconcile my other
friends to me at a time when i was doubtful whether he would forgive me
himself as he is in great circumstances i will only beg of him to
accept of two or three trifles in remembrance of a kinswoman who always
honoured him as much as he loved her particularly of that piece of
flowers which my uncle robert his father was very earnest to obtain in
order to carry it abroad with him 

i desire him likewise to accept of the little miniature picture set in
gold which his worthy father made me sit for to the famous italian
master whom he brought over with him and which he presented to me that
i might bestow it as he was pleased to say upon the man whom i should
be one day most inclined to favour 

to the same gentleman i also bequeath my rose diamond ring which was a
present from his good father to me and will be the more valuable to him
on that account 

i humbly request mrs annabella howe the mother of my dear miss howe to
accept of my respectful thanks for all her favours and goodness to me 
when i was so frequently a visiter to her beloved daughter and of a ring
of twenty-five guineas price 

my picture at full length which is in my late grandfather's closet 
 excepted in an article above from the family pictures drawn when i was
near fourteen years of age about which time my dear miss howe and i
began to know to distinguish and to love one another so dearly i
cannot express how dearly i bequeath to that sister of my heart of
whose friendship as well in adversity as prosperity when i was deprived
of all other comfort and comforters i have had such instances as that
our love can only be exceeded in that state of perfection in which i
hope to rejoice with her hereafter to all eternity 

i bequeath also to the same dear friend my best diamond ring which with
other jewels is in the private drawer of my escritoire as also all my
finished and framed pieces of needle-work the flower-piece excepted 
which i have already bequeathed to my cousin morden 

these pieces have all been taken down as i have heard and my relations
will have no heart to put them up again but if my good mother chooses to
keep back any one piece the above capital piece as it is called 
excepted not knowing but some time hence she may bear the sight of it 
i except that also from this general bequest and direct it to be
presented to her 


 see vol iii letter lv 


my whole-length picture in the vandyke taste that used to hang in my
own parlour as i was permitted to call it i bequeath to my aunt hervey 
except my mother should think fit to keep it herself 


 ibid 


i bequeath to the worthy charles hickman esq the locket with the
miniature picture of the lady he best loves which i have constantly
worn and shall continue to wear next my heart till the approach of my
last hour it must be the most acceptable present that can be made him 
next to the hand of the dear original and o my dear miss howe let it
not be long before you permit his claim to the latter for indeed you
know not the value of a virtuous mind in that sex and how preferable
such a mind is to one distinguished by the more dazzling flights of
unruly wit although the latter were to be joined by that specious
outward appearance which too too often attracts the hasty eye and
susceptible heart 


 see letter ii of this volume 


permit me my dear friends this solemn apostrophe in this last solemn
 act to a young lady so deservedly dear to me 

i make it my earnest request to my dear miss howe that she will not put
herself into mourning for me but i desire her acceptance of a ring with
my hair and that mr hickman will also accept of the like each of the
value of twenty-five guineas 

i bequeath to lady betty lawrance and to her sister lady sarah sadleir 
and to the right honourable lord m and to their worthy nieces miss
charlotte and miss martha montague each an enamelled ring with a cipher
cl h with my hair in crystal and round the inside of each the day 
month and year of my death each ring with brilliants to cost twenty
guineas and this as a small token of the grateful sense i have of the
honour of their good opinions and kind wishes in my favour and of their
truly noble offer t me of a very considerable annual provision when they
apprehended me to be entirely destitute of any 

to the reverend and learned dr arthur lewen by whose instructions i
have been equally delighted and benefited i bequeath twenty guineas for
a ring if it should please god to call him to himself before he can
receive this small bequest it is my will that his worthy daughter may
have the benefit of it 

in token of the grateful sense i have of the civilities paid me by mrs 
and miss howe's domestics from time to time in my visits there i
bequeath thirty guineas to be divided among them as their dear young
mistress shall think proper 

to each of my worthy companions and friends miss biddy lloyd miss fanny
alston miss rachel biddulph and miss cartright campbell i bequeath
five guineas for a ring 

to my late maid servant hannah burton an honest faithful creature who
loved me reverenced my mother and respected my sister and never sought
to do any thing unbecoming of her character i bequeath the sum of fifty
pounds to be paid within one month after my decease she labouring under
ill health and if that ill-health continue i commend her for farther
assistance to my good mrs norton to be put upon my poor's fund 
hereafter to be mentioned 

to the coachman groom and two footmen and five maids at
harlowe-place i bequeath ten pounds each to the helper five pounds 

to my sister's maid betty barnes i bequeath ten pounds to show that i
resent no former disobligations which i believe were owing more to the
insolence of office and to natural pertness than to personal ill will 

all my wearing-apparel of whatever sort that i have not been obliged to
part with or which is not already bequeathed my linen excepted i
desire mrs norton to accept of 

the trunks and boxes in which my clothes are sealed up i desire may not
be opened but in presence of mrs norton or of someone deputed by her 
and of mrs lovick 

to the worthy mrs lovick above-mentioned from whom i have received
great civilities and even maternal kindnesses and to mrs smith with
whom i lodge from whom also i have received great kindnesses i bequeath
all my linen and all my unsold laces to be divided equally between
them as they shall agree or in case of disagreement the same to be
sold and the money arising to be equally shared by them 

and i bequeath to the same good gentlewomen as a further token of my
thankful acknowledgements of their kind love and compassionate concern
for me the sum of twenty guineas each 

to mr smith the husband of mrs smith above-named i bequeath the sum
of ten guineas in acknowledgement of his civilities to me 

to katharine the honest maid servant of mrs smith to whom having no
servant of my own i have been troublesome i bequeath five guineas and
ten guineas more in lieu of a suit of my wearing-apparel which once 
with some linen i thought of leaving to her with this she may purchase
what may be more suitable to her liking and degree 

to the honest and careful widow anne shelburne my nurse over and above
her wages and the customary perquisites that may belong to her i
bequeath the sum of ten guineas here is a careful and to persons of
such humanity and tenderness a melancholy employment attended in the
latter part of life with great watching and fatigue which is hardly ever
enough considered 

the few books i have at my present lodgings i desire mrs lovick to
accept of and that she be permitted if she please to take a copy of my
book of meditations as i used to call it being extracts from the best
of books which she seemed to approve of although suited particularly to
my own case as for the book itself perhaps my good mrs norton will be
glad to have it as it is written with my own hand 

in the middle drawer of my escritoire at harlowe-place are many
letters and copies of letters put up according to their dates which i
have written or received in a course of years ever since i learned to
write from and to my grandfather my father and mother my uncles my
brother and sister on occasional little absences my late uncle morden 
my cousin morden mrs norton and miss howe and other of my companions
and friends before my confinement at my father's as also from the three
reverent gentlemen dr blome mr arnold and mr tomkins now with god 
and the very reverend dr lewen on serious subjects as these letters
exhibit a correspondence that no person of my sex need to be ashamed of 
allowing for the time of life when mine were written and as many
excellent things are contained in those written to me and as miss howe 
to whom most of them have been communicated wished formerly to have
them if she survived me for these reasons i bequeath them to my said
dear friend miss anna howe and the rather as she had for some years
past a very considerable share in the correspondence 

i do hereby make constitute and ordain john belford of edgware in
the county of middlesex esq the sole executor of this my last will and
testament having previously obtained his leave so to do i have given
the reasons which induced me to ask this gentleman to take upon him this
trouble to miss howe i therefore refer to her on this subject 

but i do most earnestly beg of him the said mr belford that in the
execution of his trust he will as he has repeatedly promised 
studiously endeavour to promote peace with and suppress resentments in 
every one so that all farther mischiefs may be prevented as well from 
as to his friend and in order to this i beseech him to cultivate the
friendship of my worthy cousin morden who as i presume to hope when
he understands it to be my dying request will give him his advice and
assistance in every article where it may be necessary and who will
perhaps be so good as to interpose with my relations if any difficulty
should arise about carrying out some of the articles of this my last will
into execution and to soften them into the wished-for condescension 
for it is my earnest request to mr belford that he will not seek by
law or by any sort of violence either by word or deed to extort the
performance from them if there be any articles of a merely domestic
nature that my relations shall think unfit to be carried into execution 
such articles i leave entirely to my said cousin morden and mr belford
to vary or totally dispense with as they shall agree upon the matter 
or if they two differ in opinion they will be pleased to be determined
by a third person to be chosen by them both 

having been pressed by miss howe and her mother to collect the
particulars of my sad story and given expectation that i would in order
to do my character justice with all my friends and companions but not
having time before me for the painful task it has been a pleasure for me
to find by extracts kindly communicated to me by my said executor that
i may safely trust my fame to the justice done me by mr lovelace in his
letters to him my said executor and as mr belford has engaged to
contribute what is in his power towards a compliment to be made of all
that relates to my story and knows my whole mind in this respect it is
my desire that he will cause two copies to be made of this collection 
one to remain with miss howe the other with himself and that he will
show or lend his copy if required to my aunt hervey for the
satisfaction of any of my family but under such restrictions as the said
mr belford shall think fit to impose that neither any other person's
safety may be endangered nor his own honour suffer by the
communication 

i bequeath to my said executor the sum of one hundred guineas as a
grateful though insufficient acknowledgment of the trouble he will be at
in the execution of the trust he has so kindly undertaken i desire him
likewise to accept of twenty guineas for a ring and that he will
reimburse himself for all the charges and expenses which he shall be at
in the execution of this trust 

in the worthy dr h i have found a physician a father and a friend i
beg of him as a testimony of my gratitude to accept of twenty guineas
for a ring 

i have the same obligations to the kind and skilful mr goddard who
attended me as my apothecary his very moderate bill i have discharged
down to yesterday i have always thought it incumbent upon testators to
shorten all they can the trouble of their executors i know i under-rate
the value of mr goddard's attendances when over and above what may
accrue from yesterday to the hour that will finish all i desire fifteen
guineas for a ring may be presented to him 

to the reverend mr who frequently attended me and prayed by me in
my last stages i also bequeath fifteen guineas for a ring 

there are a set of honest indigent people whom i used to call my poor 
and to whom mrs norton conveys relief each month or at shorter
periods in proportion to their necessities from a sum i deposited in
her hands and from time to time recruited as means accrued to me but
now nearly if not wholly expended now that my fault may be as little
aggravated as possible by the sufferings of the worthy people whom
heaven gave me a heart to relieve and as the produce of my grandfather's
estate including the moiety of the sums he had by him and was pleased
to give me at his death as above mentioned together with what i shall
further appropriate to the same use in the subsequent articles will as
i hope more than answer all my legacies and bequests it is my will and
desire that the remainder be it little or much shall become a fund to
be appropriated and i hereby direct that it be appropriated to the like
purposes with the sums which i put into mrs norton's hands as aforesaid
 and this under the direction and management of the said mrs norton 
who knows my whole mind in this particular and in case of her death or
of her desire to be acquitted of the management thereof it is my earnest
request to my dear miss howe that she will take it upon herself and
that at her own death she will transfer what shall remain undisposed of
at the time to such persons and with such limitations restrictions 
and provisoes as she shall think will best answer my intention for as
to the management and distribution of all or any part of it while in
mrs norton's hands or her own i will that it be entirely discretional 
and without account either to my executor or any other person 

although mrs norton as i have hinted knows my whole mind in this
respect yet it may be proper to mention in this solemn last act that
my intention is that this fund be entirely set apart and appropriated to
relieve temporarily from the interest thereof as i dare say it will be
put out to the best advantage or even from the principal if need be 
the honest industrious labouring poor only when sickness lameness 
unforeseen losses or other accidents disable them from following their
lawful callings or to assist such honest people of large families as
shall have a child of good inclinations to put out to service trade or
husbandry 

it has always been a rule with me in my little donations to endeavour
to aid and set forward the sober and industrious poor small helps if
seasonably afforded will do for such and so the fund may be of more
extensive benefit an ocean of wealth will not be sufficient for the idle
and dissolute whom therefore since they will always be in want it
will be no charity to relieve if worthier creatures would by relieving
the others be deprived of such assistance as may set the wheels of their
industry going and put them in a sphere of useful action 

but it is my express will and direction that let this fund come out to
be ever so considerable it shall be applied only in support of the
temporary exigencies of the persons i have described and that no one
family or person receive from it at one time or in one year more than
the sum of twenty pounds 

it is my will and desire that the set of jewels which was my
grandmother's and presented to me soon after her death be valued and
the worth of them paid to my executor if any of my family choose to have
them or otherwise that they should be sold and go to the augmentation
of my poor's fund but if they may be deemed an equivalent for the sums
my father was pleased to advance to me since the death of my grandfather 
i desire that they may be given to him 

i presume that the diamond necklace solitaire and buckles which were
properly my own presented by my mother's uncle sir josias brookland 
will not be purchased by any one of my family for a too obvious reason 
in this case i desire that they may be sent to the best advantage and
apply the money to the uses of my will 

in the beginning of this tedious writing i referred to the latter part
of it the naming of the subject of the discourse which i wished might be
delivered at my funeral if permitted to be interred with my ancestors 
i think the following will be suitable to my case i hope the alteration
of the words her and she for him and he may be allowable 

 let not her that is deceived trust in vanity for vanity
 shall be her recompense she shall be accomplished before
 her time and her branch shall not be green she shall
 shake off her unripe grape as the vine and shall cut off her
 flower as the olive  


 job xv 31 32 33 


but if i am to be interred in town let only the usual burial-service be
read over my corpse 

if my body be permitted to be carried down i bequeath ten pounds to be
given to the poor of the parish at the discretion of the church-wardens 
within a fortnight after my interment 

if any necessary matter be omitted in this my will or if any thing
appear doubtful or contradictory as possibly may be the case since
besides my inexperience in these matters i am now at this time very
weak and ill having put off the finishing hand a little too long in
hopes of obtaining the last forgiveness of my honoured friend in which
case i should have acknowledged the favour with a suitable warmth of
duty and filled up some blanks which i left to the very last in a more
agreeable manner to myself than now i have been enabled to do in case of
such omissions and imperfections i desire that my cousin morden will be
so good as to join with mr belford in considering them and in comparing
them with what i have more explicitly written and if after that any
doubt remain that they will be pleased to apply to miss howe who knows
my whole heart and i desire that the construction of these three may be
established and i hereby establish it provided it be unanimous and
direct it to be put in force as if i had so written and determined
myself 


and now o my blessed redeemer do i with a lively faith humbly lay
 hold of thy meritorious death and sufferings hoping to be washed
 clean in thy precious blood from all my sins in the bare hope of
 the happy consequences of which how light do those sufferings seem
 grievous as they were at the time which i confidently trust 
 will be a mean by the grace to work out for me a more exceeding
 and eternal weight of glory 

clarissa harlowe 

signed sealed published and declared the day and year above-written 
 by the said clarissa harlowe as her last will and testament 
 contained in seven sheets of paper all written with her own hand 
 and every sheet signed and sealed by herself in the presence of
 us 

john williams 
arthur bedall 
elizabeth swanton 



letter xxxiv

colonel morden to john belford esq 
sat sept 16 


i have been employed in a most melancholy task in reading the will of
the dear deceased 

the unhappy mother and mrs norton chose to be absent on the affecting
occasion but mrs harlowe made it her earnest request that every
article of it should be fulfilled 

they were all extremely touched with the preamble 

the first words of the will i clarissa harlowe now by strange
melancholy accidents lodging  etc drew tears from some sighs from
all 

the directions for her funeral in case she were or were not permitted
to be carried down the mention of her orders having been given for the
manner of her being laid out and the presence of mind so visible
throughout the whole obtained their admiration expressed by hands and
eyes lifted up and by falling tears 

when i read the direction that her body was not to be viewed except
any of her relations should vouchsafe for the last time to look upon
her  they turned away and turned to me three or four times
alternately mrs hervey and miss arabella sobbed the uncles wiped
their eyes the brother looked down the father wrung his hands 

i was obliged to stop at the words that she was nobody's 

but when i came to the address to be made to the accursed man if he
were not to be diverted from seeing her dead whom once before he had
seen in a manner dead' execration and either vows or wishes of
revenge filled every mouth 

these were still more fervently renewed when they came to hear read her
forgiveness of even this man 

you remember sir on our first reading of the will in town the
observations i made on the foul play which it is evident the excellent
creature met with from this abandoned man and what i said upon the
occasion i am not used to repeat things of that nature 

the dear creature's noble contempt of the nothing as she nobly calls it 
about which she had been giving such particular directions to wit her
body and her apologizing for the particularity of those directions from
the circumstances she was in had the same and as strong an effect upon
me as when i first read the animated paragraph and pointed by my eye 
 by turns cast upon them all affected them all 

when the article was read which bequeathed to the father the
grandfather's estate and the reason assigned for it so generous and so
dutiful the father could sit no longer but withdrew wiping his eyes 
and lifting up his spread hands at mr james harlowe who rose to attend
him to the door as arabella likewise did all he could say o son 
son o girl girl as if he reproached them for the parts they had
acted and put him upon acting 

but yet on some occasions this brother and sister showed themselves to
be true will disputants 

let tongue and eyes express what they will mr belford the first
reading of a will where a person dies worth anything considerable 
generally affords a true test of the relations' love to the deceased 

the clothes the thirty guineas for mourning to mrs norton with the
recommendation of the good woman for housekeeper at the grove were
thought sufficient had the article of 600  which was called monstrous 
been omitted some other passages in the will were called flights and
such whimsies as distinguish people of imagination from those of
judgment 

my cousin dolly hervey was grudged the library miss harlowe said that
as she and her sister never bought the same books she would take that
to herself and would make it up to her cousin dolly one way or other 

i intend mr belford to save you the trouble of interposing the
library shall be my cousin dolly's 

mrs hervey could hardly keep her seat on this occasion however she
only said that her late dear and ever dear niece was too glad to her
and hers but at another time she declared with tears that she could
not forgive herself for a letter she wrote looking at miss arabella 
whom it seems unknown to any body she had consulted before she wrote
it and which she said must have wounded a spirit that now she saw had
been too deeply wounded before 


 see vol iii letter lii 


o my aunt said arabella no more of that who would have thought that
the dear creature had been such a penitent 

mr john and mr antony harlowe were so much affected with the articles
in their favour bequeathed to them without a word or hint of reproach
or recrimination that they broke out into self-accusations and
lamented that their sweet niece as they called her was not got above
all grateful acknowledgement and returns indeed the mutual upbraidings
and grief of all present upon those articles in which every one was
remembered for good so often interrupted me that the reading took up
above six hours but curses upon the accursed man were a refuge to which
they often resorted to exonerate themselves 

how wounding a thing mr belford is a generous and well-distinguished
forgiveness what revenge can be more effectual and more noble were
revenge intended and were it wished to strike remorse into a guilty or
ungrateful heart but my dear cousin's motives were all duty and love 
she seems indeed to have been as much as a mortal could be love itself 
love sublimed by a purity by a true delicacy that hardly any woman
before her could boast of o mr belford what an example would she have
given in every station of life as wife mother mistress friend had
her lot fallen upon a man blessed with a mind like her own 

the 600  bequeathed to mrs norton the library to miss hervey and the
remembrances to miss howe were not the only articles grudged yet to
what purpose did they regret the pecuniary bequests when the poor's
fund and not themselves would have had the benefit had not those
legacies been bequeathed 

but enough passed to convince me that my cousin was absolutely right in
her choice of an executor out of the family had she chosen one in it 
i dare say that her will would have been no more regarded than if it had
been the will of a dead king than that of lousi xiv in particular so
flagrantly broken through by his nephew the duke of orleans before he was
cold the only will of that monarch perhaps which was ever disputed 

but little does mr james harlowe think that while he is grasping at
hundreds he will most probably lose thousands if he be my survivor 
a man of a spirit so selfish and narrow shall not be my heir 

you will better conceive mr belford than i can express how much they
were touched at the hint that the dear creature had been obliged to part
with some of her clothes 

silent reproach seized every one of them when i came to the passage where
she mentions that she deferred filling up some blanks in hopes of
receiving their last blessing and forgiveness 

i will only add that they could not bear to hear read the concluding
part so solemnly addressed to her redeemer they all arose from their
seats and crowded out of the apartment we were in and then as i
afterwards found separated in order to seek that consolation in
solitary retirement which though they could not hope for from their own
reflections yet at the time they had less reason to expect in each
other's company i am sir 

your faithful and obedient servant 
william morden 



letter xxxv

mr belford to the right hon lord m 
london sept 14 


my lord 

i am very apprehensive that the affair between mr lovelace and the late
excellent miss clarissa harlowe will be attended with farther bad
consequences notwithstanding her dying injunctions to the contrary i
would therefore humbly propose that your lordship and his other
relations will forward the purpose your kinsman lately had to go abroad 
where i hope he will stay till all is blown over but as he will not
stir if he knew the true motives of your wishes the avowed inducement 
as i hinted once to mr mowbray may be such as respects his own health
both of person and mind to mr mowbray and mr tourville all countries
are alike and they perhaps will accompany him 

i am glad to hear that he is in a way of recovery but this the rather
induces me to press the matter i think no time should be lost 

your lordship had head that i have the honour to be the executor of this
admirable lady's last will i transcribe from it the following
paragraph 


 he then transcribes the article which so gratefully mentions this
 nobleman and the ladies of his family in relation to the rings
 she bequeaths them about which he desires their commands  



letter xxxvi

miss montague to john belford esq 
m hall friday sept 15 


sir 

my lord having the gout in his right hand his lordship and lady sarah 
and lady betty have commanded me to inform you that before your letter
came mr lovelace was preparing for a foreign tour we shall endeavour
to hasten him away on the motives you suggest 

we are all extremely affected with the dear lady's death lady betty and
lady sarah have been indisposed ever since they heard of it they had
pleased themselves as had my sister and self with the hopes of
cultivating her acquaintance and friendship after he was gone abroad 
upon her own terms her kind remembrance of each of us has renewed 
though it could not heighten our regrets for so irreparable a loss we
shall order mr finch our goldsmith to wait on you he has our
directions about the rings they will be long long worn in memory of
the dear testatrix 

every body is assured that you will do all in your power to prevent
farther ill consequences from this melancholy affair my lord desires
his compliments to you i am sir 

your humble servant 
ch montague 


 


this collection having run into a much greater length than was wished it
is proper to omit several letters that passed between colonel morden 
miss howe mr belford and mr hickman in relation to the execution of
the lady's will etc 

it is however necessary to observe on this subject that the unhappy
mother being supported by the two uncles influenced the afflicted
father to over-rule all his son's objections and to direct a literal
observation of the will and at the same time to give up all the sums
which he was empowered by it to reimburse himself as also to take upon
himself to defray the funeral expenses 

mr belford so much obliges miss howe by his steadiness equity and
dispatch and by his readiness to contribute to the directed collection 
that she voluntarily entered into a correspondence with him as the
representative of her beloved friend in the course of which he
communicated to her in confidence the letters which passed between him
and mr lovelace and by colonel morden's consent those which passed
between that gentleman and himself 

he sent with the first parcel of letters which he had transcribed out of
short-hand for miss howe a letter to mr hickman dated the 16th of
september in which he expresses himself as follows 

but i ought sir in this parcel to have kept out one letter it is
that which relates to the interview between yourself and mr lovelace at
mr dormer's in which mr lovelace treats you with an air of levity 
which neither your person your character nor your commission deserved 
but which was his usual way of treating every one whose business he was
not pleased with i hope sir you have too much greatness of mind to be
disturbed at the contents of this letter should miss howe communicate
them to you and the rather as it is impossible that you should suffer
with her on that account 


 see vol vii letter xxviii 


mr belford then excuses mr lovelace as a good-natured man with all his
faults and gives instances of his still greater freedoms with himself 

to this mr hickman answers in his letter of the 18th 

as to mr lovelace's treatment of me in the letter you are pleased to
mention i shall not be concerned at it whatever it be i went to him
prepared to expect odd behaviour from him and was not disappointed i
argue to myself in all such cases as this as miss howe from her
ever-dear friend argues that if the reflections thrown upon me are
just i ought not only to forgive them but endeavour to profit by them 
if unjust that i ought to despise them and the reflector too since it
would be inexcusable to strengthen by anger an enemy whose malice might
be disarmed by contempt and moreover i should be almost sorry to find
myself spoken well of by a man who could treat as he treated a lady who
was an ornament to her sex and to human nature 

i thank you however sir for your consideration for me in this
particular and for your whole letter which gives me so desirable an
instance of the friendship which you assured me of when i was last in
town and which i as cordially embrace as wish to cultivate 

miss howe in her's of the 20th acknowledging the receipt of the
letters and papers and legacies sent with mr belford's letter to mr 
hickman assures him that no use shall be made of his communications 
but what he shall approve of 

he had mentioned with compassion the distresses of the harlowe family 
persons of a pitiful nature says she may pity them i am not one of
those you i think pity the infernal man likewise while i from my
heart grudge him his phrensy because it deprives him of that remorse 
which i hope in his recovery will never leave him at times sir let
me tell you that i hate your whole sex for his sake even men of
unblamable characters whom at those times i cannot but look upon as
persons i have not yet found out 

if my dear creature's personal jewels be sent up to you for sale i
desire that i may be the purchaser of them at the highest price of the
necklace and solitaire particularly 

oh what tears did the perusal of my beloved's will cost me but i must
not touch upon the heart-piercing subject i can neither take it up nor
quit it but with execration of the man whom all the world must
execrate 

mr belford in his answer promises that she shall be the purchaser of
the jewels if they come into his hands 

he acquaints her that the family had given colonel morden the keys of all
that belonged to the dear departed that the unhappy mother had as the
will allows ordered a piece of needlework to be set aside for her and
had desired mrs norton to get the little book of meditations
transcribed and to let her have the original as it was all of her dear
daughter's hand-writing and as it might when she could bear to look
into it administer consolation to herself and that she had likewise
reserved for herself her picture in the vandyke taste 

mr belford sends with this letter to miss howe the lady's memorandum
book and promises to send her copies of the several posthumous letters 
he tells her that mr lovelace being upon the recovery he had enclosed
the posthumous letter directed for him to lord m that his lordship might
give it to him or not as he should find he could bear it the
following is a copy of that letter 


to mr lovelace
thursday aug 24 

i told you in the letter i wrote to you on tuesday last that you
should have another sent you when i had got into my father's house 


 see her letter enclosed in mr lovelace's no liv of vol vii 

the reader may observe by the date of this letter that it was written
within two days of the allegorical one to which it refers and while the
lady was labouring under the increased illness occasioned by the hurries
and terrors into which mr lovelace had thrown her in order to avoid the
visit he was so earnest to make her at mr smith's so early written 
perhaps that she might not be surprised by death into a seeming breach
of her word 

high as her christian spirit soars in this letter the reader has seen 
in vol viii letter lxiv and in other places that that exalted spirit
carried her to still more divine elevations as she drew nearer to her
end 


i presume to say that i am now at your receiving of this arrived
there and i invite you to follow me as soon as you are prepared for so
great a journey 

not to allegorize farther my fate is now at your perusal of this 
accomplished my doom is unalterably fixed and i am either a miserable
or happy being to all eternity if happy i owe it solely to the divine
mercy if miserable to your undeserved cruelty and consider not for
your own sake gay cruel fluttering unhappy man consider whether the
barbarous and perfidious treatment i have met with from you was worthy
the hazard of your immortal soul since your wicked views were not to be
effected but by the wilful breach of the most solemn vows that ever were
made by man and those aided by a violence and baseness unworthy of a
human creature 

in time then once more i wish you to consider your ways your golden
dream cannot long last your present course can yield you pleasure no
longer than you can keep off thought or reflection a hardened
insensibility is the only foundation on which your inward tranquillity
is built when once a dangerous sickness seizes you when once effectual
remorse breaks in upon you how dreadful will be your condition how
poor a triumph will you then find it to have been able by a series of
black perjuries and studied baseness under the name of gallantry or
intrigue to betray poor unexperienced young creatures who perhaps knew
nothing but their duty till they knew you not one good action in the
hour of languishing to recollect not one worthy intention to revolve it
will be all reproach and horror and you will wish to have it in your
power to compound for annihilation 

reflect sir that i can have no other motive in what i write than your
good and the safety of other innocent creatures who may be drawn in by
your wicked arts and perjuries you have not in my wishes for future
welfare the wishes of a suppliant wife endeavouring for her own sake 
as well as for your's to induce you to reform those ways they are
wholly as disinterested as undeserved but i should mistrust my own
penitence were i capable of wishing to recompense evil for evil if 
black as your offences have been against me i could not forgive as i
wish to be forgiven 

i repeat therefore that i do forgive you and may the almighty forgive
you too nor have i at the writing of this any other essential regrets
than what are occasioned by the grief i have given to parents who till
i knew you were the most indulgent of parents by the scandal given to
the other branches of my family by the disreputation brought upon my
sex and by the offence given to virtue in my fall 

as to myself you have only robbed me of what once were my favourite
expectations in the transient life i shall have quitted when you receive
this you have only been the cause that i have been cut off in the bloom
of youth and of curtailing a life that might have been agreeable to
myself or otherwise as had reason to be thankful for being taken away
from the evil of supporting my part of a yoke with a man so unhappy i
will only say that in all probability every hour i had lived with him
might have brought with it some new trouble and i am indeed through
sharp afflictions and distresses indebted to you secondarily as i
humbly presume to hope for so many years of glory as might have proved
years of danger temptation and anguish had they been added to my
mortal life 

so sir though no thanks to your intention you have done me real
service and in return i wish you happy but such has been your life
hitherto that you can have no time to lose in setting about your
repentance repentance to such as have lived only carelessly and in the
omission of their regular duties and who never aimed to draw any poor
creatures into evil is not so easy a task nor so much in our own power 
as some imagine how difficult a grace then to be obtained where the
guilt is premeditated wilful and complicated 

to say i once respected you with a preference is what i ought to blush
to own since at the very time i was far from thinking you even a
mortal man though i little thought that you or indeed any man
breathing could be what you have proved yourself to be but indeed 
sir i have long been greatly above you for from my heart i have
despised you and all your ways ever since i saw what manner of man you
were 

nor is it to be wondered that i should be able so to do when that
preference was not grounded on ignoble motives for i was weak enough 
and presumptuous enough to hope to be a mean in the hand of providence 
to reclaim a man whom i thought worthy of the attempt 

nor have i yet as you will see by the pains i take on this solemn
occasion to awaken you out of your sensual dream given over all hopes
of this nature 

hear me therefore o lovelace as one speaking from the dead lose no
time set about your repentance instantly be no longer the instrument of
satan to draw poor souls into those subtile snares which at last shall
entangle your own feet seek not to multiply your offences till they
become beyond the power as i may say of the divine mercy to forgive 
since justice no less than mercy is an attribute of the almighty 

tremble and reform when you read what is the portion of the wicked man
from god thus it is written 

the triumphing of the wicked is short and the joy of the hypocrite but
for a moment he is cast into a net by his own feet he walketh upon a
snare terrors shall make him afraid on every side and shall drive him
to his feet his strength shall be hunger-bitten and destruction shall
be ready at his side the first born of death shall devour his strength 
his remembrance shall perish from the earth and he shall have no name in
the streets he shall be chaced  sic  out of the world he shall have
neither son nor nephew among his people they that have seen him shall
say where is he he shall fly away as a dream he shall be chased away
as a vision of the night his meat is the gall of asps within him he
shall flee from the iron weapon and the bow of steel shall strike him
through a fire not blown shall consume him the heaven shall reveal
his iniquity and the earth shall rise up against him the worm shall
feed sweetly on him he shall be no more remembered this is the fate
of him that knoweth not god 

whenever you shall be inclined to consult the sacred oracles from whence
the above threatenings are extracted you will find doctrines and texts
which a truly penitent and contrite heart may lay hold of for its
consolation 

may your's mr lovelace become such and may you be enabled to escape
the fate denounced against the abandoned man and be entitled to the
mercies of a long suffering and gracious god is the sincere prayer of

clarissa harlowe

 



letter xxxvii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
m hall thursday sept 14 


ever since the fatal seventh of this month i have been lost to myself 
and to all the joys of life i might have gone farther back than that
fatal seventh which for the future i will never see anniversarily
revolve but in sables only till that cursed day i had some gleams of
hope now-and-then darting in upon me 

they tell me of an odd letter i wrote to you i remember i did write 
but very little of the contents of what i wrote do i remember 


 see his delirious letter no xxiii 


i have been in a cursed way methinks something has been working
strangely retributive i never was such a fool as to disbelieve a
providence yet am i not for resolving into judgments every thing that
seems to wear an avenging face yet if we must be punished either here
or hereafter for our misdeeds better here say i than hereafter have
i not then an interest to think my punishment already not only begun but
completed since what i have suffered and do suffer passes all
description 

to give but one instance of the retributive here i who was the
barbarous cause of the loss of senses for a week together to the most
inimitable of women have been punished with the loss of my own 
preparative to who knows what when oh when shall i know a joyful
hour 

i am kept excessively low and excessively low i am this sweet
creature's posthumous letter sticks close to me all her excellencies
rise up hourly to my remembrance 

yet dare i not indulge in these melancholy reflections i find my head
strangely working again pen begone 


friday sept 15 

i resume in a sprightly vein i hope mowbray and tourville have just
now 

but what of mowbray and tourville what's the world what's any body
in it 

yet they are highly exasperated against thee for the last letter thou
wrotest to them such an unfriendly such a merciless 


 this letter appears not 


but it won't do i must again lay down my pen o belford belford 
i am still i am still most miserably absent from myself shall never 
never more be what i was 


 


saturday sunday nothing done incapable of any thing 


monday sept 18 

heavy d n y heavy and sick at soul by jupiter i must come into
their expedient i must see what change of climate will do 

you tell these fellows and you tell me of repenting and reforming but
i can do neither he who can must not have the extinction of a clarissa
harlowe to answer for harlowe curse upon the name and curse upon
myself for not changing it as i might have done yet i have no need of
urging a curse upon myself i have it effectually 

to say i once respected you with a preference  in what stiff language
does maidenly modesty on these nice occasion express itself to say i
once loved you is the english and there is truth and ease in the
expression to say i once loved you  then let it be is what i ought
to blush to own 


 see letter xxxvi of this volume 


and dost thou own it excellent creature and dost thou then own it 
what music in these words from such an angel what would i give that my
clarissa were in being and could and would own that she loved me 

but indeed sir i have been long greatly above you  long my blessed
charmer long indeed for you have been ever greatly above me and
above your sex and above all the world 

that preference was not grounded on ignoble motives 

what a wretch was i to be so distinguished by her and yet to be so
unworthy of her hope to reclaim me 

then how generous her motives not for her own sake merely not
altogether for mine did she hope to reclaim me but equally for the sake
of innocents who might otherwise be ruined by me 

and now why did she write this letter and why direct it to be given me
when an event the most deplorable had taken place but for my good and
with a view to the safety of innocents she knew not and when was this
letter written was it not at the time at the very time that i had
been pursuing her as i may say from place to place when her soul was
bowed down by calamity and persecution and herself was denied all
forgiveness from relations the most implacable 

exalted creature and couldst thou at such a time and so early and in
such circumstances have so far subdued thy own just resentments as to
wish happiness to the principal author of all thy distresses wish
happiness to him who had robbed thee of all thy favourite expectations
in this life  to him who had been the cause that thou wert cut off in
the bloom of youth 

heavenly aspirer what a frame must thou be in to be able to use the
word only in mentioning these important deprivations and as this was
before thou puttest off immortalily may i not presume that thou now 

 with pitying eye 
 not derogating from thy perfect bliss 
 survey'st all heav'n around and wishest for me 

consider my ways  dear life of my life of what avail is
consideration now when i have lost the dear creature for whose sake
alone it was worth while to have consideration lost her beyond
retrieving swallowed up by the greedy grave for ever lost her that 
that's the thing matchless woman how does this reflection wound me 

your golden dream cannot long last  divine prophetess my golden dream
is already over thought and reflection are no longer to be kept off 
 no longer continues that hardened insensibility' thou chargest upon
me remorse has broken in upon me dreadful is my condition it is
all reproach and horror with me  a thousand vultures in turn are
preying upon my heart 

but no more of these fruitless reflections since i am incapable of
writing any thing else since my pen will slide into this gloomy subject 
whether i will or not i will once more quit it nor will i again resume
it till i can be more its master and my own 

all i took pen to write for is however unwritten it was in few words 
to wish you to proceed with your communications as usual and why
should you not since in her ever-to-be-lamented death i know every
thing shocking and grievous acquaint me then with all thou knowest 
which i do not know how her relations her cruel relations take it and
whether now the barbed dart of after-reflection sticks not in their
hearts as in mine up to the very feathers 


 


i will soon quit this kingdom for now my clarissa is no more what is
there in it in the world indeed worth living for but shall i not
first by some masterly mischief avenge her and myself upon her cursed
family 

the accursed woman they tell me has broken her leg why was it not her
neck all all but what is owing to her relations is the fault of that
woman and of her hell-born nymphs the greater the virtue the nobler
the triumph was a sentence for ever in their mouths i have had it
several times in my head to set fire to the execrable house and to watch
at the doors and windows that not a devil in it escape the consuming
flames had the house stood by itself i had certainly done it 

but it seems the old wretch is in the way to be rewarded without my
help a shocking letter is received of somebody's in relation to her 
your's i suppose too shocking for me they say to see at present 


 see letter xxv of this volume 


they govern me as a child in strings yet did i suffer so much in my
fever that i am willing to bear with them till i can get tolerably
well 

at present i can neither eat drink nor sleep yet are my disorders
nothing to what they were for jack my brain was on fire day and night 
and had it not been of the asbestos kind it had all been consumed 

i had no distinct ideas but of dark and confused misery it was all
remorse and horror indeed thoughts of hanging drowning shooting then
rage violence mischief and despair took their turns with me my
lucid intervals still worse giving me to reflect upon what i was the
hour before and what i was likely to be the next and perhaps for life 
the sport of enemies the laughter of fools and the hanging-sleeved 
go-carted property of hired slaves who were perhaps to find their
account in manacling and abhorred thought in personally abusing me by
blows and stripes 

who can bear such reflections as these to be made to fear only to such
a one as me and to fear such wretches too what a thing was this but
remotely to apprehend and yet for a man to be in such a state as to
render it necessary for his dearest friends to suffer this to be done for
his own sake and in order to prevent further mischief there is no
thinking of these things 

i will not think of them therefore but will either get a train of
cheerful ideas or hang myself by to-morrow morning 

 to be a dog and dead 
 were paradise to such a life as mine 



letter xxxviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
wednesday sept 20 


i write to demand back again my last letter i own it was my mind at
the different times i wrote it and whatever ailed me i could not help
writing it such a gloomy impulse came upon me and increased as i
wrote that for my soul i could not forbear running into the miserable 

tis strange very strange that a man's conscience should be able to
force his fingers to write whether he will or not and to run him into a
subject he more than once at the very time resolved not to think of 

nor is it less strange that no new reason occurring he should in a
day or two more so totally change his mind have his mind i should
rather say so wholly illuminated by gay hopes and rising prospects as
to be ashamed of what he had written 

for on reperusal of a copy of my letter which fell into my hands by
accident in the hand-writing of my cousin charlotte who unknown to me 
had transcribed it i find it to be such a letter as an enemy would
rejoice to see 

this i know that were i to have continued but one week more in the way
i was in when i wrote the latter part of it i should have been confined 
and in straw the next for i now recollect that all my distemper was
returning upon me with irresistible violence and that in spite of
water-gruel and soup-meagre 

i own i am still excessively grieved at the disappointment this admirable
woman made it so much her whimsical choice to give me 

but since it has thus fallen out since she was determined to leave the
world and since she actually ceases to be ought i who have such a
share of life and health in hand to indulge gloomy reflections upon an
event that is passed and being passed cannot be recalled have i not
had a specimen of what will be my case if i do 

for belford tis a folly to deny it i have been to use an old word 
quite bestraught 

why why did my mother bring me up to bear no controul why was i so
enabled as that to my very tutors it was a request that i should not
know what contradiction or disappointment was ought she not to have
known what cruelty there was in her kindness 

what a punishment to have my first very great disappointment touch my
intellect and intellects once touched but that i cannot bear to think
of only thus far the very repentance and amendment wished me so
heartily by my kind and cross dear have been invalidated and postponed 
and who knows for how long the amendment at least can a madman be
capable of either 

once touched therefore i must endeavour to banish those gloomy
reflections which might otherwise have brought on the right turn of
mind and this to express myself in lord m s style that my wits may
not be sent a wool-gathering 

for let me moreover own to thee that dr hale who was my good astolfo 
 you read ariosto jack   and has brought me back my wit-jar had much
ado by starving diet by profuse phlebotomy by flaying-blisters 
eyelet-hole-cupping a dark room a midnight solitude in a midday sun to
effect my recovery and now for my comfort he tells me that i may
still have returns upon full moons horrible most horrible and must be
as careful of myself at both equinoctials as caesar was warned to be of
the ides of march 

how my heart sickens at looking back upon what i was denied the sun 
and all comfort all my visiters low-born tip-toe attendants even those
tip-toe slaves never approaching me but periodically armed with
gallipots boluses and cephalic draughts delivering their orders to me
in hated whispers and answering other curtain-holding impertinents 
inquiring how i was and how i took their execrable potions whisperingly
too what a cursed still life was this nothing active in me or about
me but the worm that never dies 

again i hasten from the recollection of scenes which will at times 
obtrude themselves upon me 

adieu belford 

but return me my last letter and build nothing upon its contents i
must i will i have already overcome these fruitless gloominess every
hour my constitution rises stronger and stronger to befriend me and 
except a tributary sigh now-and-then to the memory of my heart's beloved 
it gives me hope that i shall quickly be what i was life spirit 
gaiety and once more the plague of a sex that has been my plague and
will be every man's plague at one time or other of his life i repeat my
desire however that you will write to me as usual i hope you have
good store of particulars by you to communicate when i can better bear
to hear of the dispositions that were made for all that was mortal of my
beloved clarissa 

but it will be the joy of my heart to be told that her implacable friends
are plagued with remorse such things as those you may now send me for
company in misery is some relief especially when a man can think those
he hates as miserable as himself 

one more adieu jack 



letter xxxix

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


i am preparing to leave this kingdom mowbray and tourville promise to
give me their company in a month or two 

i'll give thee my route 

i shall first to paris and for some amusement and diversion sake try
to renew some of my old friendships thence to some of the german courts 
thence perhaps to vienna thence descend through bavaria and the tyrol
to venice where i shall keep the carnival thence to florence and turin 
thence again over mount cenis to france and when i return again to
paris shall expect to see my friend belford who by that time i doubt
not will be all crusted and bearded over with penitence self-denial 
and mortification a very anchoret only an itinerant one journeying
over in hope to cover a multitude of his own sins by proselyting his old
companions 

but let me tell thee jack if stock rises on as it has done since i
wrote my last letter i am afraid thou wilt find a difficult task in
succeeding should such be thy purpose 

nor i verily think can thy own penitence and reformation hold strong
habits are not so easily rooted out old satan has had too much benefit
from thy faithful services for a series of years to let thee so easily
get out of his clutches he knows what will do with thee a fine
strapping bona roba in the charters-taste but well-limbed 
clear-complexioned and turkish-eyed thou the first man with her or
made to believe so which is the same thing how will thy frosty face be
illuminated by it a composition will be made between thee and the grand
tempter thou wilt promise to do him suit and service till old age and
inability come and then will he in all probability be sure of thee
for ever for wert thou to outlive thy present reigning appetites he
will trump up some other darling sin or make a now secondary one
darling in order to keep thee firmly attached to his infernal interests 
thou wilt continue resolving to amend but never amending till grown
old before thou art aware a dozen years after thou art old with every
body else thy for-time-built tenement having lasted its allotted
period he claps down upon thy grizzled head the universal trap-door and
then all will be over with thee in his own way 

thou wilt think these hints uncharacteristic from me but yet i cannot
help warning thee of the danger thou art actually in which is the
greater as thou seemst not to know it a few words more therefore 
on this subject 

thou hast made good resolutions if thou keepest them not thou wilt
never be able to keep any but nevertheless the devil and thy time of
life are against thee and six to one thou failest were it only that
thou hast resolved six to one thou failest and if thou dost thou wilt
become the scoff of men and the triumph of devils then how will i
laugh at thee for this warning is not from principle perhaps i wish
it were but i never lied to man and hardly ever said truth to woman 
the firs is what all free-livers cannot say the second what every one
can 

i am mad again by jupiter but thank my stars not gloomily so 
farewell farewell farewell for the third or fourth time concludes

thy
lovelace 


i believe charlotte and you are in private league together letters i
 find have passed between her and you and lord m i have been
 kept strangely in the dark of late but will soon break upon you
 all as the sun upon a midnight thief 

remember that you never sent me the copy of my beloved's will 



letter xl

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
friday sept 22 


just as i was sitting down to answer your's of the 14th to the 18th in
order to give you all the consolation in my power came your revoking
letter of wednesday 

i am really concerned and disappointed that your first was so soon
followed by one so contrary to it 

the shocking letter you mention which your friends withhold from you is
indeed from me they may now i see show you any thing ask them 
then for that letter if you think it worth while to read aught about
the true mother of your mind 


 


i will suppose that thou hast just read the letter thou callest shocking 
and which i intended to be so and let me ask what thou thinkest of it 
dost thou not tremble at the horrors the vilest of women labours with on
the apprehensions of death and future judgment how sit the reflections
that must have been raised by the perusal of this letter upon thy yet
unclosed eyelet-holes will not some serious thoughts mingle with thy
melilot and tear off the callus of thy mind as that may flay the
leather from thy back and as thy epispastics may strip the parchment
from thy plotting head if not then indeed is thy conscience seared 
and no hopes will lie for thee 


 mr belford then gives an account of the wretched sinclair's terrible
 exit which he had just then received  

if this move thee not i have news to acquaint thee with of another
dismal catastrophe that is but within this hour come to my ear of
another of thy blessed agents thy tomlinson dying and in all
probability before this can reach thee dead in maidstone gaol as
thou sayest in thy first letter something strangely retributive seems
to be working 

this is his case he was at the head of a gang of smugglers 
endeavouring to carry off run goods landed last tuesday when a party of
dragoons came up with them in the evening some of his comrades fled 
m'donald being surrounded attempted to fight his way through and
wounded his man but having received a shot in his neck and being cut
deeply in the head by a broad-sword he fell from his horse was taken 
and carried to maidstone gaol and there my informant left him just
dying and assured of hanging if he recover 

absolutely destitute he got a kinsman of his to apply to me and if in
town to the rest of the confraternity for something not to support him
was the word for he expected not to live till the fellow returned but
to bury him 

i never employed him but once and then he ruined my project i now
thank heaven that he did but i sent him five guineas and promised him
more as from you and mowbray and tourville if he live a few days or
to take his trial and i put it upon you to make further inquiry of him 
and to give him what you think fit 

his messenger tells me that he is very penitent that he weeps
continually he cries out that he has been the vilest of men yet
palliates that his necessities made him worse than he should otherwise
have been  an excuse which none of us can plead   but that which touches
him most of all is a vile imposture he was put upon to serve a certain
gentleman of fortune to the ruin of the most excellent woman that ever
lived and who he had heard was dead of grief 

let me consider lovelace whose turn can be next 

i wish it may not be thine but since thou givest me one piece of
advice which i should indeed have thought out of character hadst thou
not taken pains to convince me that it proceeds not from principle i
will give thee another and that is prosecute as fast as thou canst 
thy intended tour change of scene and of climate may establish thy
health while this gross air and the approach of winter may thicken thy
blood and with the help of a conscience that is upon the struggle with
thee and like a cunning wrestler watches its opportunity to give thee
another fall may make thee miserable for thy life 

i return your revoked letter don't destroy it however the same
dialect may one day come in fashion with you again 

as to the family at harlowe-place i have most affecting letters from
colonel morden relating to their grief and compunction but are you to
whom the occasion is owing entitled to rejoice in their distress 

i should be sorry if i could not say that what you have warned me of in
sport makes me tremble in earnest i hope for this is a serious
subject with me though nothing can be so with you that i never shall
deserve by my apostasy to be the scoff of men and the triumph of
devils 

all that you say of the difficulty of conquering rooted habits is but
too true those and time of life are indeed too much against me but 
when i reflect upon the ends some untimely of those of our companions
whom we have formerly lost upon belton's miserable exit upon the howls
and screams of sinclair which are still in my ears and now upon your
miserable tomlinson and compare their ends with the happy and desirable
end of the inimitable miss harlowe i hope i have reason to think my
footing morally secure your caution nevertheless will be of use 
however you might design it and since i know my weak side i will
endeavour to fortify myself in that quarter by marriage as soon as i can
make myself worthy of the confidence and esteem of some virtuous woman 
and by this means become the subject of your envy rather than of your
scoffs 

i have already begun my retributory purposes as i may call them i have
settled an annual sum for life upon poor john loftus whom i disabled
while he was endeavouring to protect his young mistress from my lawless
attempts i rejoice that i succeeded not in that as i do in
recollecting many others of the like sort in which i miscarried 

poor farley who had become a bankrupt i have set up again but have
declared that the annual allowance i make her shall cease if i hear she
returns to her former courses and i have made her accountable for her
conduct to the good widow lovick whom i have taken at a handsome
salary for my housekeeper at edgware for i have let the house at
watford and she is to dispense the quarterly allotment to her as she
merits 

this good woman shall have other matters of the like nature under her
care as we grow better acquainted and i make no doubt that she will
answer my expectations and that i shall be both confirmed and improved
by her conversation for she shall generally sit at my own table 

the undeserved sufferings of miss clarissa harlowe her exalted merit 
her exemplary preparation and her happy end will be standing subjects
with us 

she shall read to me when i have no company write for me out of books 
passages she shall recommend her years turned of fifty and her good
character will secure me from scandal and i have great pleasure in
reflecting that i shall be better myself for making her happy 

then whenever i am in danger i will read some of the admirable lady's
papers whenever i would abhor my former ways i will read some of thine 
and copies of my own 

the consequence of all this will be that i shall be the delight of my
own relations of both sexes who were wont to look upon me as a lost man 
i shall have good order in my own family because i shall give a good
example myself i shall be visited and respected not perhaps by
lovelace by mowbray and by tourville because they cannot see me upon
the old terms and will not perhaps see me upon the new but by the
best and worthiest gentlemen clergy as well as laity all around me i
shall look upon my past follies with contempt upon my old companions
with pity oaths and curses shall be for ever banished my mouth in
their place shall succeed conversation becoming a rational being and a
gentleman and instead of acts of offence subjecting me perpetually to
acts of defence will i endeavour to atone for my past evils by doing
all the good in my power and by becoming an universal benefactor to the
extent of that power 

now tell me lovelace upon this faint sketch of what i hope to do and
to be if this be not a scheme infinitely preferable to the wild the
pernicious the dangerous ones both to body and soul which we have
pursued 

i wish i could make my sketch as amiable to you as it appears to me i
wish it with all my soul for i always loved you it has been my
misfortune that i did for this led me into infinite riots and follies 
of which otherwise i verily think i should not have been guilty 

you have a great deal more to answer for than i have were it only in the
temporal ruin of this admirable woman let me now while you yet have
youth and health and intellect prevail upon you for i am afraid very
much afraid that such is the enormity of this single wickedness in
depriving the world of such a shining light that if you do not quickly
reform it will be out of your power to reform at all and that
providence which has already given you the fates of your agents sinclair
and tomlinson to take warning by will not let the principal offender
escape if he slight the warning 

you will perhaps laugh at me for these serious reflections do if you
will i had rather you should laugh at me for continuing in this way of
thinking and acting than triumph over me as you threaten on my
swerving from purposes i have determined upon with such good reason and
induced and warned by such examples 

and so much for this subject at present 

i should be glad to know when you intend to set out i have too much
concern for your welfare not to wish you in a thinner air and more
certain climate 

what have tourville and mowbray to do that they cannot set out with you 
they will not covet my company i dare say and i shall not be able to
endure theirs when you are gone take them therefore with you 

i will not however forswear making you a visit at paris at your return
from germany and italy but hardly with the hope of reclaiming you if
due reflection upon what i have set before you and upon what you have
written in your two last will not by that time have done it 

i suppose i shall see you before you go once more i wish you were gone 
this heavy island-air cannot do for you what that of the continent will 

i do not think i ought to communicate with you as i used to do on this
side the channel let me then hear from you on the opposite shore and
you shall command the pen as you please and honestly the power of

j belford 



letter xli

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
tuesday sept 26 


fate i believe in my conscience spins threads for tragedies on
purpose for thee to weave with thy watford uncle poor belton the
fair inimitable  exalted creature and is she to be found in such a
list   the accursed woman and tomlinson seemed to have been all doomed
to give thee a theme for the dismal and the horrible and by my soul 
that thou dost work it going as lord m would phrase it 

that's the horrid thing a man cannot begin to think but causes for
thought crowd in upon him the gloomy takes place and mirth and gaiety
abandon his heard for ever 

poor m'donald i am really sorry for the fellow he was an useful 
faithful solemn varlet who could act incomparably any part given him 
and knew not what a blush was he really took honest pains for me in the
last affair which has cost him and me so dearly in reflection often
gravelled as we both were yet was he never daunted poor m'donald i
must once more say for carrying on a solemn piece of roguery he had no
equal 

i was so solicitous to know if he were really as bad as thou hast a knack
of painting every body whom thou singlest out to exercise thy murdering
pen upon that i dispatched a man and horse to maidstone as soon as i
had thine and had word brought me that he died in two hours after he
had received thy five guineas and all thou wrotest of his concern in
relation to the ever-dear miss harlowe it seems was true 

i can't help it belford i have only to add that it is happy that the
poor fellow lived not to be hanged as it seems he would have been for
who knows as he had got into such a penitential strain what might have
been in his dying speech 

when a man has not great good to comfort himself with it is right to
make the best of the little that may offer there never was any
discomfort happened to mortal man but some little ray of consolation
would dart in if the wretch was not so much a wretch as to draw 
instead of undraw the curtain to keep it out 

and so much at this time and for ever for poor capt tomlinson as i
called him 

your solicitude to get me out of this heavy changeable climate exactly
tallies with every body's here they all believe that travelling will
establish me yet i think i am quite well only these plaguy news and
fulls and the equinoctals fright me a little when i think of them and
that is always for the whole family are continually ringing these
changes in my ears and are more sedulously intent than i can well
account for to get me out of the kingdom 

but wilt thou write often when i am gone wilt thou then piece the
thread where thou brokest it off wilt thou give me the particulars of
their distress who were my auxiliaries in bringing on the event that
affects me nay principals rather since say what thou wilt what did
i do worth a woman's breaking her heart for 

faith and troth jack i have had very hard usage as i have often said 
 to have such a plaguy ill name given me screamed out upon run away
from as a mad dog would be all my own friends ready to renounce me 
yet i think i deserve it all for have i not been as ready to give up
myself as others are to condemn me 

what madness what folly this who will take the part of a man that
condemns himself who can he that pleads guilty to an indictment 
leaves no room for aught but the sentence out upon me for an
impolitical wretch i have not the art of the least artful of any of our
christian princes who every day are guilty of ten times worse breaches
of faith and yet issuing out a manifesto they wipe their mouths and
go on from infraction to infraction from robbery to robbery commit
devastation upon devastation and destroy for their glory and are
rewarded with the names of conquerors and are dubbed le grand praised 
and even deified by orators and poets for their butcheries and
depredations 

while i a poor single harmless prowler at least comparatively
harmless in order to satisfy my hunger steal but one poor lamb and
every mouth is opened every hand is lifted up against me 

nay as i have just now heard i am to be manifestoed against though
no prince for miss howe threatens to have the case published to the whole
world 

i have a good mind not to oppose it and to write an answer to it as
soon as it comes forth and exculpate myself by throwing all the fault
upon the old ones and this i have to plead supposing all that my worst
enemies can allege against me were true that i am not answerable for
all the extravagant consequences that this affair has been attended with 
and which could not possibly be foreseen 

and this i will prove demonstrably by a case which but a few hours ago 
i put to lord m and the two misses montague this it is 

suppose a a miser had hid a parcel of gold in a secret place in order
 to keep it there till he could lend it out at extravagant
 interest 

suppose b in such a great want of this treasure as to be unable to live
 without it 

and suppose a the miser has such an opinion of b the wanter that he
 would rather lend it to him than to any mortal living but yet 
 though he has no other use in the world for it insists upon very
 unconscionable terms 

b would gladly pay common interest for it but would be undone in his
 own opinion at least and that is every thing to him if he
 complied with the miser's terms since he would be sure to be soon
 thrown into gaol for the debt and made a prisoner for life 
 wherefore guessing being an arch penetrating fellow where the
 sweet hoard lies he searches for it when the miser is in a
 profound sleep finds it and runs away with it 

 b in this case can only be a thief that's plain jack  


here miss montague put in very smartly a thief sir said she that
steals what is and ought to be dearer to me than my life deserves less
to be forgiven than he who murders me 

but what is this cousin charlotte said i that is dearer to you than
your life your honour you'll say i will not talk to a lady i never
did in a way she cannot answer me but in the instance for which i put
my case allowing all you attribute to the phantom what honour is lost 
where the will is not violated and the person cannot help it but with
respect to the case put how knew we till the theft was committed that
the miser did actually set so romantic a value upon the treasure 

both my cousins were silent and my lord because he could not answer me 
cursed me and i proceeded 

well then the result is that b can only be a thief that's plain to
pursue therefore my case 

suppose this same miserly a on awaking and searching for and finding
 his treasure gone takes it so much to heart that he starves
 himself 

who but himself is to blame for that would either equity law or
 conscience hang b for a murder 

and now to apply said i 

none of your applications cried my cousins both in a breath 

none of your applications and be d d to you the passionate peer 

well then returned i i am to conclude it to be a case so plain that it
needs none looking at the two girls who tried for a blush a-piece and
i hold myself of consequence acquitted of the death 

not so cried my lord  peers are judges thou knowest jack in the last
resort   for if by committing an unlawful act a capital crime is the
consequence you are answerable for both 

say you so my good lord but will you take upon you to say supposing
 as in the present case a rape saving your presence cousin charlotte 
saving your presence cousin patty is death the natural consequence of
a rape did you ever hear my lord or did you ladies that it was 
and if not the natural consequence and a lady will destroy herself 
whether by a lingering death as of grief or by the dagger as lucretia
did is there more than one fault the man's is not the other her's 
were it not so let me tell you my dears chucking each of my blushing
cousins under the chin we either would have had no men so wicked as
young tarquin was or no women so virtuous as lucretia in the space of 
how many thousand years my lord and so lucretia is recorded as a
single wonder 

you may believe i was cried out upon people who cannot answer will
rave and this they all did but i insisted upon it to them and so i do
to you jack that i ought to be acquitted of every thing but a common
theft a private larceny as the lawyers call it in this point and
were my life to be a forfeit of the law it would not be for murder 

besides as i told them there was a circumstance strongly in my favour
in this case for i would have been glad with all my soul to have
purchased my forgiveness by a compliance with the terms i first boggled
at and this you all know i offered and my lord and lady betty and
lady sarah and my two cousins and all my cousins' cousins to the
fourteenth generation would have been bound for me but it would not do 
the sweet miser would break her heart and die and how could i help it 

upon the whole jack had not the lady died would there have been half
so much said of it as there is was i the cause of her death or could
i help it and have there not been in a million of cases like this 
nine hundred and ninty-nine thousand that have not ended as this has
ended how hard then is my fate upon my soul i won't bear it as i
have done but instead of taking guilt to myself claim pity and this
 since yesterday cannot be recalled is the only course i can pursue to
make myself easy proceed anon 



letter xlii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 


but what a pretty scheme of life hast thou drawn out for thyself and thy
old widow by my soul jack i was mightily taken with it there is but
one thing wanting in it and that will come of course only to be in the
commission and one of the quorum thou art already provided with a
clerk as good as thou'lt want in the widow lovick for thou
understandest law and she conscience a good lord chancellor between ye 
 i should take prodigious pleasure to hear thee decide in a bastard
case upon thy new notions and old remembrances 

but raillery apart  all gloom at heart by jupiter although the pen
and the countenance assume airs of levity   if after all thou canst so
easily repent and reform as thou thinkest thou canst if thou canst thus
shake off thy old sins and thy old habits and if thy old master will so
readily dismiss so tried and so faithful a servant and permit thee thus
calmly to enjoy thy new system no room for scandal all temptation
ceasing and if at last thy reformation warranted and approved by time 
thou marriest and livest honest why belford i cannot but say that
if all these if's come to pass thou standest a good chance to be a happy
man 

all i think as i told thee in my last is that the devil knows his own
interest too well to let thee off so easily thou thyself tallest me 
that we cannot repent when we will and indeed i found it so for in my
lucid intervals i made good resolutions but as health turned its blithe
side to me and opened my prospects of recovery all my old inclinations
and appetites returned and this letter perhaps will be a thorough
conviction to thee that i am as wild a fellow as ever or in the way to
be so 

thou askest me very seriously if upon the faint sketch thou hast
drawn thy new scheme be not infinitely preferable to any of those which
we have so long pursued why jack let me reflect why belford i
can't say i can't say but it is to speak out it is really as biddy
in the play says a good comfortable scheme 

but when thou tallest me that it was thy misfortune to love me because
thy value for me made thee a wickeder man than otherwise thou wouldst
have been i desire thee to revolve this assertion and i am persuaded
that thou wilt not find thyself in so right a train as thou imaginest 

no false colourings no glosses does a true penitent aim at 
debasement diffidence mortification contrition are all near of a kin 
jack and inseparable from a repentant spirit if thou knowest not this 
thou art not got three steps out of threescore towards repentance and
amendment and let me remind thee before the grand accuser come to do
it that thou wert ever above being a passive follower in iniquity 
though thou hadst not so good an invention as he to whom thou writest 
thou hadst as active an heart for mischief as ever i met with in man 

then for improving an hint thou wert always a true englishman i never
started a roguery that did not come out of thy forge in a manner ready
anvilled and hammered for execution when i have sometimes been at a loss
to make any thing of it myself 

what indeed made me appear to be more wicked than thou was that i being
a handsome fellow and thou an ugly one when we had started a game and
hunted it down the poor frighted puss generally threw herself into my
paws rather than into thine and then disappointed hast thou wiped thy
blubber-lips and marched off to start a new game calling me a wicked
fellow all the while 

in short belford thou wert an excellent starter and setter the old
women were not afraid for their daughters when they saw such a face as
thine but when i came whip was the key turned upon the girls and
yet all signified nothing for love upon occasion will draw an elephant
through a key-hole but for thy heart belford who ever doubted the
wickedness of that 

nor even in this affair that sticks most upon me which my conscience
makes such a handle of against me art thou so innocent as thou fanciest
thyself thou wilt stare at this but it is true and i will convince
thee of it in an instant 

thou sayest thou wouldst have saved the lady from the ruin she met with 
thou art a pretty fellow for this for how wouldst thou have saved her 
what methods didst thou take to save her 

thou knewest my designs all along hadst thou a mind to make thyself a
good title to the merit to which thou now pretendest to lay claim thou
shouldest like a true knight-errant have sought to set the lady free
from the enchanted castle thou shouldst have apprized her of her
danger have stolen in when the giant was out of the way or hadst thou
had the true spirit of chivalry upon thee and nothing else would have
done have killed the giant and then something wouldst thou have had to
brag of 

oh but the giant was my friend he reposed a confidence in me and i
should have betrayed my friend and his confidence  this thou wouldst
have pleaded no doubt but try this plea upon thy present principles 
and thou wilt see what a caitiff thou wert to let it have weight with
thee upon an occasion where a breach of confidence is more excusable
than to keep the secret did not the lady herself once putt his very
point home upon me and didst thou not on that occasion heavily blame
thyself 


 see vol vii letter xxi 


thou canst not pretend and i know thou wilt not that thou wert afraid
of thy life by taking such a measure for a braver fellow lives not nor
a more fearless than jack belford i remember several instances and
thou canst not forget them where thou hast ventured thy bones thy neck 
thy life against numbers in a cause of roguery and hadst thou had a
spark of that virtue which now thou art willing to flatter thyself thou
hast thou wouldst surely have run a risk to save an innocence and a
virtue that it became every man to protect and espouse this is the
truth of the case greatly as it makes against myself but i hate a
hypocrite from my soul 

i believe i should have killed thee at the time if i could hadst thou
betrayed me thus but i am sure now that i would have thanked thee for
it with all my heart and thought thee more a father and a friend than
my real father and my best friend and it was natural for thee to think 
with so exalted a merit as this lady had that this would have been the
case when consideration took place of passion or rather when the
d d fondness for intrigue ceased which never was my pride so much as
it is now upon reflection my curse 

set about defending myself and i will probe thee still deeper and
convince thee still more effectually that thou hast more guilt than
merit even in this affair and as to all the others in which we were
accustomed to hunt in couples thou wert always the forwardest whelp and
more ready by far to run away with me than i with thee yet canst
thou now compose thy horse-muscles and cry out how much more hadst
thou lovelace to answer for than i have saying nothing neither when
thou sayest this were it true for thou wilt not be tried when the time
comes by comparison in short thou mayest at this rate so miserably
deceive thyself that notwithstanding all thy self-denial and
mortification when thou closest thy eyes thou mayst perhaps open them
in a place where thou thoughtest least to be 

however consult thy old woman on this subject i shall be thought to be
out of character if i go on in this strain but really as to a title
to merit in this affair i do assure thee jack that thou less deservest
praise than a horsepond and i wish i had the sousing of thee 


 


i am actually now employed in taking leave of my friends in the country 
i had once thought of taking tomlinson as i called him with me but his
destiny has frustrated that intention 

next monday i think to see you in town and then you and i and mowbray 
and tourville will laugh off that evening together they will both
accompany me as i expect you will to dover if not cross the water i
must leave you and them good friends they take extremely amiss the
treatment you have given them in your last letters they say you strike
at their understandings i laugh at them and tell them that those
people who have least are the most apt to be angry when it is called
into question 

make up all the papers and narratives you can spare me against the time 
the will particularly i expect to take with me who knows but that
those things which will help to secure you in the way you are got into 
may convert me 

thou talkest of a wife jack what thinkest you of our charlotte her
family and fortune i doubt according to thy scheme are a little too
high will those be an objection charlotte is a smart girl for piety
 thy present turn i cannot say much yet she is as serious as most of
her sex at her time of life would flaunt it a little i believe too 
like the rest of them were her reputation under covert 

but it won't do neither now i think of it thou art so homely and so
awkward a creature hast such a boatswain-like air people would think
she had picked thee up in wapping or rotherhithe or in going to see
some new ship launched or to view the docks at chatham or portsmouth 
so gaudy and so clumsy thy tawdriness won't do with charlotte so sit
thee down contented belford although i think in a whimsical way as
now i mentioned charlotte to thee once before yet would i fain secure
thy morals too if matrimony will do it let me see now i have it 
has not the widow lovick a daughter or a niece it is not every girl of
fortune and family that will go to prayers with thee once or twice a day 
but since thou art for taking a wife to mortify with what if thou
marriest the widow herself she will then have a double concern in thy
conversation you and she may tete a tete pass many a comfortable
winter's evening together comparing experiences as the good folks call
them 


 see the postscript to letter xl of vol viii 


i am serious jack faith i am and i would have thee take it into thy
wise consideration 

r l 


mr belford returns a very serious answer to the preceding letter which
 appears not 

in it he most heartily wishes that he had withstood mr lovelace 
 whatever had been the consequence in designs so elaborately base
 and ungrateful and so long and steadily pursued against a lady
 whose merit and innocence entitled her to the protection of every
 man who had the least pretences to the title of a gentleman and
 who deserved to be even the public care 

he most severely censures himself for his false notions of honour to his
 friend on this head and recollects what the divine lady as he
 calls her said to him on this very subject as related by himself
 in his letter to lovelace no xxi vol vii to which lovelace
 also both instigator and accuser refers and to his own regret
 and shame on the occasion he distinguishes however between an
 irreparable injury intended to a clarissa and one designed to such
 of the sex as contribute by their weakness and indiscretion to
 their own fall and thereby entitle themselves to a large share of
 the guilt which accompanies the crime 

he offers not he says to palliate or extenuate the crimes he himself
 has been guilty of but laments for mr lovelace's own sake that
 he gives him with so ludicrous and unconcerned an air such solemn
 and useful lessons and warnings nevertheless he resolves to make
 it his whole endeavour he tells him to render them efficacious to
 himself and should think himself but too happy if he shall be
 enabled to set him such an example as may be a mean to bring about
 the reformation of a man so dear to him as he has always been from
 the first of their acquaintance and who is capable of thinking so
 rightly and deeply though at present to such little purpose as
 make his very knowledge add to his condemnation 



letter xliii

mr belford to colonel morden
thursday sept 21 


give me leave dear sir to address myself to you in a very serious and
solemn manner on a subject that i must not cannot dispense with as i
promised the divine lady that i would do every thing in my power to
prevent that further mischief of which she was so very apprehensive 

i will not content myself with distant hints it is with very great
concern that i have just now heard of a declaration which you are said to
have made to your relations at harlowe-place that you will not rest till
you have avenged your cousin's wrongs upon mr lovelace 

far be it from me to offer to defend the unhappy man or even unduly to
extenuate his crime but yet i must say that the family by their
persecutions of the dear lady at first and by their implacableness
afterwards ought at least to share the blame with him there is even
great reason to believe that a lady of such a religious turn her virtue
neither to be surprised nor corrupted her will inviolate would have got
over a mere personal injury especially as he would have done all that
was in his power to repair it and as from the application of all his
family in his favour and other circumstances attending his sincere and
voluntary offer the lady might have condescended with greater glory to
herself than if he had never offended 

when i have the pleasure of seeing you next i will acquaint you sir 
with all the circumstances of this melancholy story from which you will
see that mr lovelace was extremely ill treated at first by the whole
family this admirable lady excepted this exception i know heightens
his crime but as his principal intention was but to try her virtue and
that he became so earnest a suppliant to her for marriage and as he has
suffered so deplorably in the loss of his reason for not having it in
his power to repair her wrongs i presume to hope that much is to be
pleaded against such a resolution as you are said to have made i will
read to you at the same time some passages from letters of his two of
which one but this moment received will convince you that the unhappy
man who is but now recovering his intellects needs no greater
punishment than what he has from his own reflections 

i have just now read over the copies of the dear lady's posthumous
letters i send them all to you except that directed for mr lovelace 
which i reserve till i have the pleasure of seeing you let me entreat
you to read once more that written to yourself and that to her brother 
which latter i now send you as they are in point to the present subject 


 see letter xvi of this volume 


i think sir they are unanswerable such at least is the effect they
have upon me that i hope i shall never be provoked to draw my sword
again in a private quarrel 

to the weight these must needs have upon you let me add that the
unhappy man has given no new occasion of offence since your visit to him
at lord m s when you were so well satisfied of his intention to atone
for his crimes that you yourself urged to your dear cousin her
forgiveness of him 

let me also though i presume to hope there is no need when you coolly
consider every thing remind you of your own promise to your departing
cousin relying upon which her last moments were the easier 

reflect my dear colonel morden that the highest injury was to her her
family all have a share in the cause she forgives it why should we not
endeavour to imitate what we admire 

you asked me sir when in town if a brave man could be a premeditatedly
base one generally speaking i believe bravery and baseness are
incompatible but mr lovelace's character in the instance before us 
affords a proof of the truth of the common observation that there is no
general rule but has its exceptions for england i believe as gallant a
nation as it is deemed to be has not in it a braver spirit than his nor
a man who has a greater skill at his weapons nor more calmness with his
skill 

i mention not this with a thought that it can affect col morden who if
he be not withheld by superior motives as well as influenced by those i
have reminded him of will tell me that this skill and this bravery 
will make him the more worthy of being called upon by him 

to these superior motives then i refer myself and with the greater
confidence as a pursuit ending in blood would not at this time have
the plea lie for it with any body which sudden passion might have with
some but would be construed by all to be a cool and deliberate act of
revenge for an evil absolutely irretrievable an act of which a brave and
noble spirit such as is the gentleman's to whom i now write is not
capable 

excuse me sir for the sake of my executorial duty and promise keeping
in eye the dear lady's personal injunctions as well as written will 
enforced by letters posthumous every article of which solicitous as we
both are to see it duly performed she would have dispensed with rather
than farther mischief should happen on her account i am dear sir 

your affectionate and faithful friend 
j belford 



letter xliv

 this is the posthumous letter to col morden referred to in the above  

superscribed 

to my beloved cousin william morden esq 
to be delivered after my death 


my dearest cousin 

as it is uncertain from my present weak state whether if living i may
be in a condition to receive as i ought the favour you intend me of a
visit when you come to london i take this opportunity to return you 
while able the humble acknowledgments of a grateful heart for all your
goodness to me from childhood till now and more particularly for your
present kind interposition in my favour god almighty for ever bless you 
dear sir for the kindness you endeavoured to procure for me 

one principal end of my writing to you in this solemn manner is to beg
of you which i do with the utmost earnestness that when you come to
hear the particulars of my story you will not suffer active resentment
to take place in your generous breast on my account 

remember my dear cousin that vengeance is god's province and he has
undertaken to repay it nor will you i hope invade that province 
especially as there is no necessity for you to attempt to vindicate my
fame since the offender himself before he is called upon has stood
forth and offered to do me all the justice that you could have extorted
from him had i lived and when your own person may be endangered by
running an equal risque with a guilty man 

duelling sir i need not tell you who have adorned a public character 
is not only an usurpation of the divine prerogative but it is an insult
upon magistracy and good government tis an impious act tis an
attempt to take away a life that ought not to depend upon a private
sword an act the consequence of which is to hurry a soul all its sins
upon its had into perdition endangering that of the poor triumpher 
since neither intend to give to the other that chance as i may call it 
for the divine mercy in an opportunity for repentance which each
presumes to hope for himself 

seek not then i beseech you sir to aggravate my fault by a pursuit of
blood which must necessarily be deemed a consequence of that fault 
give not the unhappy man the merit were you assuredly to be the victor 
of falling by your hand at present he is the perfidious the ungrateful
deceiver but will not the forfeiture of his life and the probable loss
of his soul be a dreadful expiation for having made me miserable for a
few months only and through that misery by the divine favour happy to
all eternity 

in such a case my cousin where shall the evil stop and who shall
avenge on you and who on your avenger 

let the poor man's conscience then dear sir avenge me he will one
day find punishment more than enough from that leave him to the chance
of repentance if the almighty will give him time for it who should you
deny it him let him still be the guilty aggressor and let no one say 
clarissa harlowe is now amply revenged in his fall or in the case of
your's which heaven avert that her fault instead of being buried in
her grave is perpetuated and aggravated by a loss far greater than
that of herself 

often sir has the more guilty been the vanquisher of the less an earl
of shrewsbury in the reign of charles ii as i have read endeavouring
to revenge the greatest injury that man can do to man met with his death
at barn-elms from the hand of the ignoble duke who had vilely
dishonoured him nor can it be thought an unequal dispensation were it
generally to happen that the usurper of the divine prerogative should be
punished for his presumption by the man whom he sought to destroy and
who however previously criminal is put in this case upon a necessary
act of self-defence 

may heaven protect you sir in all your ways and once more i pray 
reward you for all your kindness to me a kindness so worthy of your
heart and so exceedingly grateful to mine that of seeking to make
peace and to reconcile parents to a once-beloved child uncles to a
niece late their favourite and a brother and sister to a sister whom
once they thought not unworthy of that tender relation a kindness so
greatly preferable to the vengeance of a murdering sword 

be a comforter dear sir to my honoured parents as you have been to me 
and may we through the divine goodness to us both meet in that blessed
eternity into which as i humbly trust i shall have entered when you
will read this 

so prays and to her latest hour will pray my dear cousin morden my
friend my guardian but not my avenger  dear sir remember that  

your ever-affectionate and obliged
clarissa harlowe 



letter xlv

colonel morden to john belford esq 
saturday sept 23 


dear sir 

i am very sorry that any thing you have heard i have said should give you
uneasiness 

i am obliged to you for the letters you have communicated to me and
still further for your promise to favour me with others occasionally 

all that relates to my dear cousin i shall be glad to see be it from
whom it will 

i leave to your own discretion what may or may not be proper for miss
howe to see from a pen so free as mine 

i admire her spirit were she a man do you think sir she at this
time would have your advice to take upon such a subject as that upon
which you write 

fear not however that your communications shall put me upon any
measures that otherwise i should not have taken the wickedness sir is
of such a nature as admits not of aggravation 

yet i do assure you that i have not made any resolutions that will be a
tie upon me 

i have indeed expressed myself with vehemence upon the occasion who
could forbear to do so but it is not my way to resolve in matters of
moment till opportunity brings the execution of my purposes within my
reach we shall see by what manner of spirit this young man will be
actuated on his recovery if he continue to brave and defy a family 
which he has so irreparably injured if but resolutions depending upon
future contingencies are best left to future determination as i just
now hinted 

mean time i will own that i think my cousin's arguments unanswerable 
no good man but must be influenced by them but alas sir who is good 

as to your arguments i hope you will believe me when i assure you as i
now do that your opinion and your reasonings have and will always have 
great and deserved weight with me and that i respect you still more than
i did if possible for your expostulations in support of my cousin's
pious injunctions to me they come from you sir with the greatest
propriety as her executor and representative and likewise as you are a
man of humanity and a well-wisher to both parties 

i am not exempt from violent passions sir any more than your friend 
but then i hope they are only capable of being raised by other people's
insolence and not by my own arrogance if ever i am stimulated by my
imperfections and my resentments to act against my judgment and my
cousin's injunctions some such reflections as these that follow will
run away with my reason indeed they are always present with me 


in the first place my own disappointment who came over with the hope of
 passing the remainder of my days in the conversation of a kinswoman
 so beloved and to whom i have a double relation as her cousin and
 trustee 

then i reflect too too often perhaps for my engagements to her in her
 last hours that the dear creature could only forgive for herself 
 she no doubt is happy but who shall forgive for a whole family 
 in all its branches made miserable for their lives 

that the more faulty her friends were as to her the more enormous his
 ingratitude and the more inexcusable what sir was it not enough
 that she suffered what she did for him but the barbarian must make
 her suffer for her sufferings for his sake passion makes me
 express this weakly passion refuses the aid of expression
 sometimes where the propriety of a resentment prima facie declares
 expression to be needless i leave it to you sir to give this
 reflection its due force 

that the author of this diffusive mischief perpetuated it premeditatedly 
 wantonly in the gaiety of his heart to try my cousin say you 
 sir to try the virtue of a clarissa sir has she then given him
 any cause to doubt her virtue it could not be if he avers that
 she did i am indeed called upon but i will have patience 

that he carried her as now appears to a vile brothel purposely to put
 her out of all human resource himself out of the reach of all
 human remorse and that finding her proof against all the common
 arts of delusion base and unmanly arts were there used to effect
 his wicked purposes once dead the injured saint in her will 
 says he has seen her 

that i could not know this when i saw him at m hall that the object
 of his attempts considered i could not suppose there was such a
 monster breathing as he that it was natural for me to impute her
 refusal of him rather to transitory resentment to consciousness of
 human frailty and mingled doubts of the sincerity of his offers 
 than to villanies which had given the irreversible blow and had
 at that instant brought her down to the gates of death which in a
 very few days enclosed her 

that he is a man of defiance a man who thinks to awe every one by his
 insolent darings and by his pretensions to superior courage and
 skill 

that disgrace as he is to his name and to the character of a gentleman 
 the man would not want merit who in vindication of the
 dishonoured distincion should expunge and blot him out of the
 worthy list 

that the injured family has a son who however unworthy of such a
 sister is of a temper vehement unbridled fierce unequal 
 therefore as he has once indeed been found to a contention
 with this man the loss of which son by a violent death on such
 an occasion and by a hand so justly hated would complete the
 misery of the whole family and who nevertheless resolves to
 call him to account if i do not his very misbehaviour perhaps 
 to such a sister stimulating his perverse heart to do her memory
 the more signal justice though the attempt might be fatal to
 himself 

then sir to be a witness as i am every hour to the calamity and
 distress of a family to which i am related every one of whom 
 however averse to an alliance with him while it had not place 
 would no doubt have been soon reconciled to the admirable
 creature had the man to whom for his family and fortunes it
 was not a disgrace to be allied done her but common justice 

to see them hang their pensive heads mope about shunning one another 
 though formerly never used to meet but to rejoice in each other 
 afflicting themselves with reflections that the last time they
 respectively saw the dear creature it was here or there at such
 a place in such an attitude and could they have thought that it
 would have been the last every one of them reviving instances of
 her excellencies that will for a long time make their very
 blessings a curse to them 

her closet her chamber her cabinet given up to me to disfurnish in
 order to answer now too late obliging the legacies bequeathed 
 unable themselves to enter them and even making use of less
 convenient back stairs that they may avoid passing by the doors
 of her apartment 

her parlour locked up the walks the retirements the summer-house in
 which she delighted and in which she used to pursue her charming
 works that in particular from which she went to the fatal
 interview shunned or hurried by or over 

her perfections nevertheless called up to remembrance and enumerated 
 incidents and graces unheeded before or passed over in the group
 of her numberless perfections now brought back into notice and
 dwelt upon 

the very servants allowed to expatiate upon these praiseful topics to
 their principals even eloquent in their praises the distressed
 principals listening and weeping then to see them break in upon
 the zealous applauders by their impatience and remorse and throw
 abroad their helpless hands and exclaim then again to see them
 listen to hear more of her praises and weep again they even
 encouraging the servants to repeat how they used to be stopt by
 strangers to ask after her and by those who knew her to be told
 of some new instances to her honour how aggravating all this 

in dreams they see her and desire to see her always an angle and
 accompanied by angels always clad in robes of light always
 endeavouring to comfort them who declare that they shall never
 more know comfort 

what an example she set how she indited how she drew how she
 wrought how she talked how she sung how she played her
 voice music her accent harmony 

her conversation how instructive how sought after the delight of
 persons of all ages of both sexes of all ranks yet how humble 
 how condescending never were dignity and humility so
 illustriously mingled 

at other times how generous how noble how charitable how judicious in
 her charities in every action laudable in every attitude
 attractive in every appearance whether full-dressed or in the
 housewife's more humble garb equally elegant and equally lovely 
 like or resembling miss clarissa harlowe they now remember to
 be a praise denoting the highest degree of excellence with every
 one whatever person action or rank spoken of the desirable
 daughter the obliging kinswoman the affectionate sister all
 envy now subsided the faithful the warm friend the affable 
 the kind the benevolent mistress not one fault remembered all
 their severities called cruelties mutually accusing each other 
 each him and herself and all to raise her character and torment
 themselves 


such sir was the angel of whom the vilest of men has deprived the
world you sir who know more of the barbarous machinations and
practices of this strange man can help me to still more inflaming
reasons were they needed why a man not perfect may stand excused to
the generality of the world if he should pursue his vengeance and the
rather as through an absence of six years high as just report and the
promises of her early youth from childhood had raised her in his
esteem he could not till now know one half of her excellencies till
now that we have lost for ever lost the admirable creature 

but i will force myself from the subject after i have repeated that i
have not yet made any resolutions that can bind me whenever i do i
shall be glad they may be such as may merit the honour of your
approbation 

i send you back the copies of the posthumous letters i see the humanity
of your purpose in the transmission of them to me and i thank you most
heartily for it i presume that it is owing to the same laudable
consideration that you kept back the copy of that to the wicked man
himself 

i intend to wait upon miss howe in person with the diamond ring and such
other of the effects bequeathed to her as are here i am sir 

your most faithful and obliged servant 
wm morden 


 mr belford in his answer to this letter farther enforces the lady's
 dying injunctions and rejoices that the colonel has made no
 vindictive resolutions and hopes every thing from his prudence
 and consideration and from his promise given to the dying lady 

he refers to the seeing him in town on account of the dreadful ends of
 two of the greatest criminals in his cousin's affair this says
 he together with mr lovelace's disorder of mind looks as if
 providence had already taken the punishment of these unhappy
 wretches into its own hands 

he desires the colonel will give him a day's notice of his coming to
 town lest otherwise he may be absent at the time this he does 
 though he tells him not the reason with a view to prevent a
 meeting between him and mr lovelace who might be in town as he
 apprehends about the same time in his way to go abroad  



letter xlvi

colonel morden to john belford esq 
tuesday sept 26 


dear sir 

i cannot help congratulating myself as well as you that we have already
got through with the family every article of the will where they have any
concern 

you left me a discretional power in many instances and in pursuance of
it i have had my dear cousin's personal jewels and will account to you
for them at the highest price when i come to town as well as for other
matters that you were pleased to intrust to my management 

these jewels i have presented to my cousin dolly hervey in
acknowledgement of her love to the dear departed i have told miss howe
of this and she is as well pleased with what i have done as if she had
been the purchaser of them herself as that young lady has jewels of her
own she could only have wished to purchase these because they were her
beloved friend's the grandmother's jewels are also valued and the
money will be paid me for you to be carried to the uses of the will 

mrs norton is preparing by general consent to enter upon her office as
housekeeper at the grove but it is my opinion that she will not be long
on this side heaven 

i waited upon miss howe myself as i told you i would with what was
bequeathed to her and her mother you will not be displeased perhaps 
if i make a few observations with regard to that young lady so dear to
my beloved cousin as you have not a personal acquaintance with her 

there never was a firmer or nobler friendship in women than between my
dear cousin and miss howe to which this wretched man had given a period 

friendship generally speaking mr belford is too fervent a flame for
female minds to manage a light that but in few of their hands burns
steady and often hurries the sex into flight and absurdity like other
extremes it is hardly ever durable marriage which is the highest
state of friendship generally absorbs the most vehement friendships of
female to female and that whether the wedlock be happy or not 

what female mind is capable of two fervent female friendships at the same
time this i mention as a general observation but the friendship that
subsisted between these two ladies affords a remarkable exception to it 
which i account for from those qualities and attainments in both which 
were they more common would furnish more exceptions still in favour of
the sex 

both had an enlarged and even a liberal education both had minds
thirsting after virtuous knowledge great readers both great writers 
 and early familiar writing i take to be one of the greatest openers and
improvers of the mind that man or woman can be employed in   both
generous high in fortune therefore above that dependence each on the
other that frequently destroys that familiarity which is the cement of
friendship both excelling in different ways in which neither sought
to envy the other both blessed with clear and distinguishing faculties 
with solid sense and from their first intimacy  i have many of my
lights sir from mrs norton   each seeing something in the other to
fear as well as to love yet making it an indispensable condition of
their friendship each to tell the other of her failings and to be
thankful for the freedom taken one by nature gentle the other made so
by her love and admiration of her exalted friend impossible that there
could be a friendship better calculated for duration 

i must however take the liberty to blame miss howe for her behaviour
to mr hickman and i infer from it that even women of sense are not
to be trusted with power 

by the way i am sure i need not desire you not to communicate to this
fervent young lady the liberties i have taken with her character 

i dare say my cousin could not approve of miss howe's behaviour to this
gentleman a behaviour which is talked of by as many as know mr hickman
and her can a wise young lady be easy under such censure she must
know it 

mr hickman is really a very worthy man every body speaks well of him 
but he is gentle-dispositioned and he adores miss howe and love admits
not of an air of even due dignity to the object of it yet will mr 
hickman hardly ever get back the reins he has yielded up unless she by
carrying too far the power of which she seems at present too sensible 
should when she has no favours to confer which he has not a right to
demand provoke him to throw off the too-heavy yoke and should he do
so and then treat her with negligence miss howe of all the women i
know will be the least able to support herself under it she will then
be more unhappy than she ever made him for a man who is uneasy at home 
can divert himself abroad which a woman cannot so easily do without
scandal permit me to take farther notice as to miss howe that it is
very obvious to me that she has by her haughty behaviour to this worthy
man involved herself in one difficulty from which she knows not how to
extricate herself with that grace which accompanies all her actions she
intends to have mr hickman i believe she does not dislike him and it
will cost her no small pains to descend from the elevation she has
climbed to 

another inconvenience she will suffer from her having taught every body
 for she is above disguise to think by her treatment of mr hickman 
much more meanly of him than he deserves to be thought of and must she
not suffer dishonour in his dishonour 

mrs howe is much disturbed at her daughter's behaviour to the gentleman 
he is very deservedly a favourite of her's but  another failing in miss
howe  her mother has not all the authority with her that a mother ought
to have miss howe is indeed a woman of fine sense but it requires a
high degree of good understanding as well as a sweet and gentle
disposition of mind and great discretion in a child when grown up to
let it be seen that she mingles reverence with her love to a parent 
who has talents visibly inferior to her own 

miss howe is open generous noble the mother has not any of her fine
qualities parents in order to preserve their children's veneration for
them should take great care not to let them see any thing in their
conduct or behaviour or principles which they themselves would not
approve of in others 

mr hickman has however this consideration to comfort himself with 
that the same vivacity by which he suffers makes miss howe's own mother 
at times equally sensible and as he sees enough of this beforehand he
will have more reason to blame himself than the lady should she prove as
lively a wife as she was a mistress for having continued his addresses 
and married her against such threatening appearances 

there is also another circumstance which good-natured men who engage
with even lively women may look forward to with pleasure a circumstance
which generally lowers the spirits of the ladies and domesticates them 
as i may call it and which as it will bring those of mr hickman and
miss howe nearer to a par that worthy gentleman will have double reason 
when it happens to congratulate himself upon it 

but after all i see that there is something so charmingly brilliant and
frank in miss howe's disposition although at present visibly overclouded
by grief that it is impossible not to love her even for her failings 
she may and i hope she will make mr hickman an obliging wife and if
she does she will have additional merit with me since she cannot be
apprehensive of check or controul and may therefore by her generosity
and prudence lay an obligation upon her husband by the performance of
what is no more than her duty 

her mother both loves and fears her yet is mrs howe also a woman of
vivacity and ready enough i dare say to cry out when she is pained 
but alas she has as i hinted above weakened her authority by the
narrowness of her mind 

yet once she praised her daughter to me with so much warmth for the
generosity of her spirit that had i not known the old lady's character 
i should have thought her generous herself and yet i have always
observed that people of narrow tempers are ready to praise generous
ones and thus have i accounted for it that such persons generally find
it to their purpose that all the world should be open-minded but
themselves 

the old lady applied herself to me to urge to the young one the contents
of the will in order to hasten her to fix a day for her marriage but
desired that i would not let miss howe know that she did 

i took the liberty upon it to tell miss howe that i hoped that her part
of a will so soon and so punctually in almost all its other articles 
fulfilled would not be the only one that would be slighted 

her answer was she would consider of it and made me a courtesy with
such an air as showed me that she thought me more out of my sphere than
i could allow her to think me had i been permitted to argue the point
with her 

i found miss howe and her own servant-maid in deep mourning this it
seems had occasioned a great debate at first between her mother and her 
her mother had the words of the will on her side and mr hickman's
interest in her view her daughter having said that she would wear it for
six months at least but the young lady carried her point strange 
said she if i who shall mourn the heavy the irreparable loss to the
last hour of my life should not show my concern to the world for a few
months 

mr hickman for his part was so far from uttering an opposing word on
this occasion that on the very day that miss howe put on her's he
waited on her in a new suit of mourning as for a near relation his
servants and equipage made the same respectful appearance 

whether the mother was consulted by him in it i cannot say but the
daughter knew nothing of it till she saw him in it she looked at him
with surprise and asked him for whom he mourned 

the dear and ever-dear miss harlowe he said 

she was at a loss it seems at last all the world ought to mourn for
my clarissa said she but whom man  that was her whimsical address to
him   thinkest thou to oblige by this appearance 

it is more than appearance madam i love not my own sister worthy as
she is better than i loved miss clarissa harlowe i oblige myself by
it and if i disoblige not you that is all i wish 

she surveyed him i am told from head to foot she knew not at first 
whether to be angry or pleased at length i thought at first  said
she that you might have a bolder and freer motive but as my mamma
says you may be a well-meaning man though generally a little
wrong-headed however as the world is censorious and may think us
nearer of kin than i would have it supposed i must take care that i am
not seen abroad in your company 

but let me add mr belford that if this compliment of mr hickman or
this more than compliment as i may call it since the worthy man speaks
not of my dear cousin without emotion does not produce a short day i
shall think miss howe has less generosity in her temper than i am willing
to allow her 

you will excuse me mr belford for the particularities which you
invited and encouraged having now seen every thing that relates to the
will of my dear cousin brought to a desirable issue i will set about
making my own i shall follow the dear creature's example and give my
reasons for every article that there may be no room for
after-contention 

what but a fear of death a fear unworthy of a creature who knows that he
must one day as surely die as he was born can hinder any one from making
such a disposition 

i hope soon to pay my respects to you in town mean time i am with
great respect dear sir 

your faithful and affectionate humble servant 
wm morden 



letter xlvii

mr belford to miss howe
thursday sept 28 


madam 

i do myself the honour to send you by this according to my promise 
copies of the posthumous letters written by your exalted friend 


 see letter xxxvi of this volume 


these will be accompanied with other letters particularly a copy of one
from mr lovelace begun to be written on the 14th and continued down to
the 18th you will see by it madam the dreadful anguish that his
spirits labour with and his deep remorse 


 see letter xxxvii ibid 


mr lovelace sent for this letter back i complied but i first took a
copy of it as i have not told him that i have done so you will be
pleased to forbear communicating of it to any body but mr hickman that
gentleman's perusal of it will be the same as if nobody but yourself saw
it 

one of the letters of colonel morden which i enclose you will observe 
madam is only a copy the true reason for which as i will ingenuously
acknowledge is some free but respectful animadversions which the
colonel has made upon your declining to carry into execution your part of
your dear friend's last requests i have therefore in respect to that
worthy gentleman having a caution from him on that head omitted those
parts 


 the preceding letter 


will you allow me madam however to tell you that i myself could not
have believed that my inimitable testatrix's own miss howe would have
been the most backward in performing such a part of her dear friend's
last will as is entirely in her own power to perform especially when
that performance would make one of the most deserving men in england
happy and whom i presume she proposes to honour with her hand 

excuse me madam i have a most sincere veneration for you and would not
disoblige you for the world 

i will not presume to make remarks on the letters i send you nor upon
the informations i have to give you of the dreadful end of two unhappy
wretches who were the greatest criminals in the affair of your adorable
friend these are the infamous sinclair and a person whom you have read
of no doubt in the letters of the charming innocent by the name of
captain tomlinson 

the wretched woman died in the extremest tortures and despondency the
man from wounds got in defending himself in carrying on a contraband
trade both accusing themselves in their last hours for the parts they
had acted against the most excellent of women as of the crime that gave
them the deepest remorse 

give me leave to say madam that if your compassion be not excited for
the poor man who suffers so greatly from his own anguish of mind as you
will observe by his letter he does and for the unhappy family whose
remorse you will see by colonel morden's is so deep your terror must 
and yet i should not wonder if the just sense of the irreparable loss
you have sustained hardens a heart against pity which on a less
extraordinary occasion would want its principal grace if it were not
compassionate 

i am madam with the greatest respect and gratitude 
your most obliged and faithful humble servant 
j belford 



letter xlviii

miss howe to john belford esq 
saturday sept 30 


sir 

i little thought i ever could have owed so much obligation to any man as
you have laid me under and yet what you have sent me has almost broken
my heart and ruined my eyes 

i am surprised though agreeably that you have so soon and so well got
over that part of the trust you have engaged in which relates to the
family 

it may be presumed from the exits you mention of two of the infernal
man's accomplices that the thunderbolt will not stop short of the
principal indeed i have some pleasure to think it seems rolling along
towards the devoted head that has plotted all the mischief but let me 
however say that although i think mr morden not altogether in the
wrong in his reasons for resentment as he is the dear creature's kinsman
and trustee yet i think you very much in the right in endeavouring to
dissuade him from it as you are her executor and act in pursuance of
her earnest request 

but what a letter is that of the infernal man's i cannot observe upon
it neither can i for very different reasons upon my dear creature's
posthumous letters particularly on that to him o mr belford what
numberless perfections died when my clarissa drew her last breath 

if decency be observed in his letters for i have not yet had patience
to read above two or three of them besides this horrid one which i
return to you enclosed i may some time hence be curious to look by
their means into the hearts of wretches which though they must be the
abhorrence of virtuous minds will when they are laid open as i
presume they are in them afford a proper warning to those who read
them and teach them to detest men of such profligate characters 

if your reformation be sincere you will not be offended that i do not
except you on this occasion and thus have i helped you to a criterion
to try yourself by 

by this letter of the wicked man it is apparent that there are still
wickeder women but see what a guilty commerce with the devils of your
sex will bring those to whose morals ye have ruined for these women
were once innocent it was man that made them otherwise the first bad
man perhaps threw them upon worse men those upon still worse till
they commenced devils incarnate the height of wickedness or of shame
is not arrived at all at once as i have somewhere heard observed 

but this man this monster rather for him to curse these women and to
curse the dear creature's family implacable as the latter were in
order to lighten a burden he voluntarily took up and groans under is
meanness added to wickedness and in vain will he one day find his low
plea of sharing with her friends and with those common wretches a guilt
which will be adjudged him as all his own though they too may meet their
punishment as it is evidently begun in the first in their ineffectual
reproaches of one another in the second as you have told me 

this letter of the abandoned wretch i have not shown to any body not
even to mr hickman for sir i must tell you i do not as yet think it
the same thing as only seeing it myself 

mr hickman like the rest of his sex would grow upon indulgence one
distinction from me would make him pay two to himself insolent
creepers or encroachers all of you to show any of you a favour to-day 
you would expect it as a right to-morrow 

i am as you see very open and sincere with you and design in another
letter to be still more so in answer to your call and colonel morden's
call upon me in a point that concerns me to explain myself upon to my
beloved creature's executor and to the colonel as her only tender and
only worthy relation 

i cannot but highly applaud colonel morden for his generosity to miss
dolly hervey 

o that he had arrived time enough to save my inimitable friend from the
machinations of the vilest of men and from the envy and malice of the
most selfish and implacable of brothers and sisters 

anna howe 



letter xlix

miss howe to john belford esq 
monday oct 2 


when you question me sir as you do and on a subject so affecting to
me in the character of the representative of my best beloved friend 
and have in every particular hitherto acted up to that character you are
entitled to my regard especially as you are joined in your questioning
of me by a gentleman whom i look upon as the dearest and nearest because
worthiest relation of my dear friend and who it seems has been so
severe a censurer of my conduct that your politeness will not permit you
to send me his letter with others of his but a copy only in which the
passages reflecting upon me are omitted 

i presume however that what is meant by this alarming freedom of the
colonel is no more than what you both have already hinted to me as if
you thought i were not inclined to pay so much regard to my beloved
creature's last will in my own case as i would have others pay to it 
a charge that i ought not to be quite silent under 

you have observed no doubt that i have seemed to value myself upon the
freedom i take in declaring my sentiments without reserve upon every
subject that i pretend to touch upon and i can hardly question that i
have or shall in your opinion by my unceremonious treatment of you
upon so short an acquaintance run into the error of those who wanting
to be thought above hypocrisy and flattery fall into rusticity if not
ill-manners a common fault with such who not caring to correct
constitutional failings seek to gloss them over by some nominal virtue 
when all the time perhaps these failings are entirely owing to native
arrogance or at least to a contracted rust that they will not 
because it would give them pain submit to have filed off 

you see sir that i can however be as free with myself as with you 
and by what i am going to write you will find me still more free and
yet i am aware that such of my sex as will not assume some little
dignity and exact respect from your's will render themselves cheap 
and perhaps for their modesty and diffidence be repaid with scorn and
insult 

but the scorn i will endeavour not to deserve and the insult i will not
bear 

in some of the dear creature's papers which you have had in your
possession and must again have in order to get transcribed you will
find several friendly but severe reprehensions of me on account of a
natural or at least an habitual warmth of temper which she was
pleased to impute to me 

i was thinking to give you her charge against me in her own words from
one of her letters delivered to me with her own hands on taking leave
of me on the last visit she honoured me with but i will supply that
charge by confession of more than it imports to wit that i am haughty 
uncontroulable and violent in my temper  this i say impatient of
contradiction  was my beloved's charge  from any body but her dear
self she should have said   and aim not at that affability that
gentleness next to meekness which in the letter i was going to
communicate she tells me are the peculiar and indispensable
characteristics of a real fine lady who she is pleased to say should
appear to be gall-less as a dove and never should know what warmth or
high spirit is but in the cause of religion or virtue or in cases where
her own honour the honour of a friend or that of an innocent person is
concerned 

now sir as i needs must plead guilty to this indictment do you think i
ought not to resolve upon a single life i who have such an opinion of
your sex that i think there is not one man in an hundred whom a woman of
sense and spirit can either honour or obey though you make us promise
both in that solemn form of words which unites or rather binds us to you
in marriage 

when i look round upon all the married people of my acquaintance and see
how they live and what they bear who live best i am confirmed in my
dislike to the state 

well do your sex contrive to bring us up fools and idiots in order to
make us bear the yoke you lay upon our shoulders and that we may not
despise you from our hearts as we certainly should if we were brought
up as you are for your ignorance as much as you often make us do as
it is for your insolence 

these sir are some of my notions and with these notions let me
repeat my question do you think i ought to marry at all 

if i marry either a sordid or an imperious wretch can i do you think 
live with him and ought a man of a contrary character for the sake of
either of our reputations to be plagued with me 

long did i stand out against all the offers made me and against all the
persuasions of my mother and to tell you the truth the longer and
with the more obstinacy as the person my choice would have first fallen
upon was neither approved by my mother nor by my dear friend this
riveted me to my pride and to my opposition for although i was
convinced after a while that my choice would neither have been prudent
nor happy and that the specious wretch was not what he had made me
believe he was yet could i not easily think of any other man and
indeed from the detection of him took a settled aversion to the whole
sex 

at last mr hickman offered himself a man worthy of a better choice he
had the good fortune  he thinks it so  to be agreeable and to make his
proposals agreeable to my mother 

as to myself i own that were i to have chosen a brother mr hickman
should have been the man virtuous sober sincere friendly as he is 
but i wish not to marry nor knew i the man in the world whom i could
think deserving of my beloved friend but neither of our parents would
let us live single 

the accursed lovelace was proposed warmly to her at one time and while
she was yet but indifferent to him they by ungenerous usage of him 
 for then sir he was not known to be beelzebub himself and by
endeavouring to force her inclinations in favour first of one worthless
man then of another in antipathy to him through her foolish brother's
caprice turned that indifference from the natural generosity of her
soul into a regard which she never otherwise would have had for a man of
his character 

mr hickman was proposed to me i refused him again and again he
persisted my mother his advocate i told him my dislike of all men of
him of matrimony still he persisted i used him with tyranny led 
indeed partly by my temper partly by design hoping thereby to get rid
of him till the poor man his character unexceptionably uniform still
persisting made himself a merit with me by his patience this brought
down my pride  i never sir was accounted very ungenerous nor quite
ungrateful   and gave me at one time an inferiority in my own opinion
to him which lasted just long enough for my friends to prevail upon me
to promise him encouragement and to receive his addresses 

having done so when the weather-glass of my pride got up again i found
i had gone too far to recede my mother and my friends both held me to
it yet i tried him i vexed him an hundred ways and not so much
neither with design to vex him as to make him hate me and decline his
suit 

he bore this however and got nothing but my pity yet still my mother 
and my friend having obtained my promise  made however not to him 
but to them   and being well assured that i valued no man more than mr 
hickman who never once disobliged me in word or deed or look except
by his foolish perseverance insisted upon the performance 

while my dear friend was in her unhappy uncertainty i could not think of
marriage and now what encouragement have i she my monitress my
guide my counsel gone for ever gone by whose advice and instructions
i hoped to acquit myself tolerably in the state to which i could not
avoid entering for sir my mother is so partially mr hickman's
friend that i am sure should any difference arise she would always
censure me and acquit him even were he ungenerous enough to remember me
in his day 

this sir being my situation consider how difficult it is for me to
think of marriage whenever we approve we can find an hundred good
reasons to justify our approbation whenever we dislike we can find a
thousand to justify our dislike every thing in the latter case is an
impediment every shadow a bugbear thus can i enumerate and swell 
perhaps only imaginary grievances i must go whither he would have me
to go visit whom he would have me to visit well as i love to write 
 though now alas my grand inducement to write is over it must be to
whom he pleases  and mrs hickman who as miss howe cannot do wrong 
would hardly ever be able to do right thus the tables turned upon me 
i am reminded of my vowed obedience madam'd up perhaps to matrimonial
perfection and all the wedded warfare practised comfortably over between
us for i shall not be passive under insolent treatment till we become
curses to each other a bye-word to our neighbours and the jest of our
own servants 

but there must be bear and forbear methinks some wise body will tell me 
but why must i be teased into a state where that must be necessarily the
case when now i can do as i please and wish only to be let alone to do
as best pleases me and what in effect does my mother say anna
howe you now do every thing that pleases you you now have nobody to
controul you you go and you come you dress and you undress you rise
and you go to rest just as you think best but you must be happier
still child  

as how madam 

why you must marry my dear and have none of these options but in
every thing do as your husband commands you 

this is very hard you will own sir for such a one as me to think of 
and yet engaged to enter into that state as i am how can i help
myself my mother presses me my friend my beloved friend writing as
from the dead presses me and you and mr morden as executors of her
will remind me the man is not afraid of me  i am sure were i the man 
i should not have half his courage   and i think i ought to conclude to
punish him the only effectual way i have to do it for his perverse
adherence and persecution with the grant of his own wishes a punishment
which many others who enjoy their's very commonly experience 

let me then assure you sir that when i can find in the words of my
charming friend in her will writing of her cousin hervey that my grief
for her is mellowed by time into a remembrance more sweet than painful 
that i may not be utterly unworthy of the passion a man of some merit has
for me i will answer the request of my dear friend so often repeated 
and so earnestly pressed and mr hickman shall find if he continue to
deserve my gratitude that my endeavours shall not be wanting to make him
amends for the patience he has had and must still a little while longer
have with me and then will it be his own fault i hope not mine if our
marriage answer not those happy prognostics which filled her generous
presaging mind upon this view as she once for my encouragement and to
induce me to encourage him told me 

thus sir have i in a very free manner accounted to you as to the
executor of my beloved friend for all that relates to you as such to
know and even for more than i needed to do against myself only that
you will find as much against me in some of her letters and so losing
nothing i gain the character of ingenuousness with you 

and thus much for the double reprimand on my delaying my part of the
performance of my dear friend's will 

and now while you are admonishing me on this subject let me remind you
of one great article relating to yourself it is furnished me by my dear
creature's posthumous letter to you i hope you will not forget that the
most benevolent of her sex expresses herself as earnestly concerned for
your thorough reformation as she does for my marrying you'll see to
it then that her wishes are as completely answered in that particular 
as you are desirous they should be in all others 

i have i own disobeyed her in one article and that is where she
desires i would not put myself into mourning i could not help it 

i send this and mine of saturday last together and will not add another
word after i have told you that i think myself

your obliged servant 
a howe 



letter l

mr belford to miss howe
thursday night oct 5 


i return you madam my most respectful thanks for your condescending
hint in relation to the pious wishes of your exalted friend for my
thorough reformation 

i will only say that it will be my earnest and unwearied endeavour to
make those generous wishes effectual and i hope for the divine blessing
upon such my endeavours or else i know they will be in vain 

i cannot madam express how much i think myself obliged to you for your
farther condescension in writing to me so frankly the state of your past
and present mind in relation to the single and matrimonial life if the
lady by whom as the executor of her inimitable friend i am thus
honoured has failings never were failings so lovely in woman how much
more lovely indeed than the virtues of many of her sex 

i might have ventured into the hands of such a lady the colonel's
original letter entire the worthy gentleman exceedingly admires you 
and this caution was the effect of his politeness only and of his regard
for you 

i send you madam a letter from lord m to myself and the copies of
three others written in consequence of that these will acquaint you
with mr lovelace's departure from england and with other particulars 
which you will be curious to know 

be pleased to keep to yourself such of the contents as your own prudence
will suggest to you ought not to be seen by any body else 

i am madam with the profoundest and most grateful respect 

your faithful and obliged humble servant 
john belford 



letter li

lord m to john belford esq 
m hall friday sept 29 


dear sir 

my kinsman lovelace is now setting out for london proposing to see you 
and then to go to dover and so embark god send him well out of the
kingdom 

on monday he will be with you i believe pray let me be favoured with
an account of all your conversations for mr mowbray and mr tourville
are to be there too and whether you think he is grown quite his own man
again 

what i mostly write for is to wish you to keep colonel morden and him
asunder and so i give you notice of his going to town i should be very
loth there should be any mischief between them as you gave me notice
that the colonel threatened my nephew but my kinsman would not bear
that so nobody let him know that he did but i hope there is no fear 
for the colonel does not as i hear threaten now for his own sake i
am glad of that for there is not such a man in the world as my kinsman
is said to be at all the weapons as well he was not he would not be so
daring 

we shall all here miss the wild fellow to be sure there is no man
better company when he pleases 

pray do you never travel thirty or forty miles i should be glad to see
you here at m hall it will be charity when my kinsman is gone for we
suppose you will be his chief correspondent although he has promised to
write to my nieces often but he is very apt to forget his promises to
us his relations particularly god preserve us all amen prays

your very humble servant 
m 



letter lii

mr belford to lord m 
london tuesday night oct 3 


my lord 

i obey your lordship's commands with great pleasure 

yesterday in the afternoon mr lovelace made me a visit at my lodgings 
as i was in expectation of one from colonel morden about the same time 
i thought proper to carry him to a tavern which neither of us frequented 
 on pretence of a half-appointment ordering notice to be sent me
thither if the colonel came and mr lovelace sent to mowbray and
tourville and mr doleman of uxbridge who came to town to take leave
of him to let them know where to find us 

mr lovelace is too well recovered i was going to say i never saw him
more gay lively and handsome we had a good deal of bluster about some
parts of the trust i had engaged in and upon freedoms i had treated him
with in which he would have it that i had exceeded our agreed-upon
limits but on the arrival of our three old companions and a nephew of
mr doleman's who had a good while been desirous to pass an hour with
mr lovelace it blew off for the present 

mr mowbray and mr tourville had also taken some exceptions at the
freedoms of my pen and mr lovelace after his way took upon him to
reconcile us and did it at the expense of all three and with such an
infinite run of humour and raillery that we had nothing to do but to
laugh at what he said and at one another i can deal tolerably with
him at my pen but in conversation he has no equal in short it was his
day he was glad he said to find himself alive and his two friends 
clapping and rubbing their hands twenty times in an hour declared that
now once more he was all himself the charming'st fellow in the world 
and they would follow him to the farthest part of the globe 

i threw a bur upon his coat now-and-then but none would stick 

your lordship knows that there are many things which occasion a roar of
applause in conversation when the heart is open and men are resolved to
be merry which will neither bear repeating nor thinking of afterwards 
common things in the mouth of a man we admire and whose wit has passed
upon us for sterling become in a gay hour uncommon we watch every
turn of such a one's countenance and are resolved to laugh when he
smiles even before he utters what we are expecting to flow from his
lips 

mr doleman and his nephew took leave of us by twelve mowbray and
tourville grew very noisy by one and were carried off by two wine
never moves mr lovelace notwithstanding a vivacity which generally
helps on over-gay spirits as to myself the little part i had taken
in the gaiety kept me unconcerned 

the clock struck three before i could get him into any serious or
attentive way so natural to him is gaiety of heart and such strong
hold had the liveliness of the evening taken of him his conversation 
you know my lord when his heart is free runs off to the bottom without
any dregs 

but after that hour and when we thought of parting he became a little
more serious and then he told me his designs and gave me a plan of his
intended tour wishing heartily that i could have accompanied him 

we parted about four he not a little dissatisfied with me for we had
some talk about subjects which he said he loved not to think of to
whit miss harlowe's will my executorship papers i had in confidence
communicated to that admirable lady with no unfriendly design i assure
your lordship and he insisting upon and i refusing the return of the
letters he had written to me from the time that he had made his first
addresses to her 

he would see me once again he said and it would be upon very ill terms
if i complied not with his request which i bid him not expect but 
that i might not deny him every thing i told him that i would give him
a copy of the will though i was sure i said when he read it he would
wish he had never seen it 

i had a message from him about eleven this morning desiring me to name
a place at which to dine with him and mowbray and tourville for the
last time and soon after another from colonel morden inviting me to
pass the evening with him at the bedford-head in covent-garden and 
that i might keep them at distance from one another i appointed mr 
lovelace at the eagle in suffolk-street 

there i met him and the two others we began where we left off at our
last parting and were very high with each other but at last all was
made up and he offered to forget and forgive every thing on condition
that i would correspond with him while abroad and continue the series
which had been broken through by his illness and particularly give him 
as i had offered a copy of the lady's last will 

i promised him and he then fell to rallying me on my gravity and on my
reformation-schemes as he called them as we walked about the room 
expecting dinner to be brought in he laid his hand upon my shoulder 
then pushed me from him with a curse walking round me and surveying me
from head to foot then calling for the observations of the others he
turned round upon his heel and with one of his peculiar wild airs ha 
ha ha ha  burst he out that these sour-faced proselytes should take
it into their heads that they cannot be pious without forfeiting both
their good-nature and good-manners why jack  turning me about 
pr'ythee look up man dost thou not know that religion if it has
taken proper hold of the heart is the most cheerful countenance-maker
in the world i have heard my beloved miss harlowe say so and she knew 
or nobody did and was not her aspect a benign proof of the observation 
but thy these wamblings in thy cursed gizzard and thy awkward grimaces 
i see thou'rt but a novice in it yet ah belford belford thou hast
a confounded parcel of briers and thorns to trample over barefoot before
religion will illuminate these gloomy features 

i give your lordship this account in answer to your desire to know if i
think him the man he was 

in our conversation at dinner he was balancing whether he should set out
the next morning or the morning after but finding he had nothing to
do and col morden being in town which however i told him not of i
turned the scale and he agreed upon setting out to-morrow morning they
to see him embark and i promised to accompany them for a morning's ride
 as they proposed their horses but said that i must return in the
afternoon 

with much reluctance they let me go to my evening's appointment they
little thought with whom for mr lovelace had put it as a case of honour
to all of us whether as he had been told that mr morden and mr james
harlowe had thrown out menaces against him he ought to leave the kingdom
till he had thrown himself in their way 

mowbray gave his opinion that he ought to leave it like a man of honour
as he was and if he did not take those gentlemen to task for their
opprobrious speeches that at least he should be seen by them in public
before he went away else they might give themselves airs as if he had
left the kingdom in fear of them 

to this he himself so much inclined that it was with difficulty i
persuaded him that as they had neither of them proceeded to a direct
and formal challenge as they knew he had not made himself difficult of
access and as he had already done the family injury enough and it was
miss harlowe's earnest desire that he would be content with that he had
no reason from any point of honour to delay his journey especially as
he had so just a motive for his going as the establishing of his health 
and as he might return the sooner if he saw occasion for it 

i found the colonel in a very solemn way we had a good deal of
discourse upon the subject of certain letters which had passed between us
in relation to miss harlowe's will and to her family he has some
accounts to settle with his banker which he says will be adjusted
to-morrow and on thursday he proposes to go down again to take leave of
his friends and then intends to set out directly for italy 

i wish mr lovelace could have been prevailed upon to take any other
tour than that of france and italy i did propose madrid to him but he
laughed at me and told me that the proposal was in character from a
mule and from one who was become as grave as a spaniard of the old cut 
at ninety 

i expressed to the colonel my apprehensions that his cousin's dying
injunctions would not have the force upon him that were to be wished 

they have great force upon me mr belford  said he or one world
would not have held mr lovelace and me thus long but my intention is
to go to florence and not to lay my bones there as upon my cousin's
death i told you i thought to do but to settle all my affairs in those
parts and then to come over and reside upon a little paternal estate in
kent which is strangely gone to ruin in my absence indeed were i to
meet mr lovelace either here or abroad i might not be answerable for
the consequence 

he would have engaged me for to-morrow but having promised to attend
mr lovelace on his journey as i have mentioned i said i was obliged
to go out of town and was uncertain as to the time of my return in the
evening and so i am to see him on thursday morning at my own lodgings 

i will do myself the honour to write again to your lordship to-morrow
night mean time i am my lord 

your lordship's etc 



letter liii

mr belford to lord m 
wedn night oct 4 


my lord 

i am just returned from attending mr lovelace as far as gad's-hill near
rochester he was exceeding gay all the way mowbray and tourville are
gone on with him they will see him embark and under sail and promise
to follow him in a month or two for they say there is no living without
him now he is once more himself 

he and i parted with great and even solemn tokens of affection but yet
not without gay intermixtures as i will acquaint your lordship 

taking me aside and clasping his arms about me adieu dear belford 
said he may you proceed in the course you have entered upon whatever
airs i give myself this charming creature has fast hold of me here 
 clapping his hand upon his heart  and i must either appear what you see
me or be what i so lately was o the divine creature  lifting up his
eyes 

but if i live to come to england and you remain fixed in your present
way and can give me encouragement i hope rather to follow your example 
than to ridicule you for it this will  for i had given him a copy of
it  i will make the companion of my solitary hours you have told me a
part of its melancholy contents and that and her posthumous letter 
shall be my study and they will prepare me for being your disciple if
you hold on 

you jack may marry  continued he and i have a wife in my eye for
you only thou'rt such an awkward mortal   he saw me affected and
thought to make me smile   but we don't make ourselves except it be
worse by our dress thou art in mourning now as well as i but if ever
thy ridiculous turn lead thee again to be beau-brocade i will bedizen
thee as the girls say on my return to my own fancy and according to
thy own natural appearance thou shalt doctor my soul and i will
doctor thy body thou shalt see what a clever fellow i will make of thee 

as for me i never will i never can marry that i will not take a few
liberties and that i will not try to start some of my former game i
won't promise habits are not so easily shaken off but they shall be by
way of wearing so return and reform shall go together 

and now thou sorrowful monkey what aileth thee  i do love him my
lord 

adieu and once more adieu  embracing me and when thou thinkest
thou hast made thyself an interest out yonder looking up then put in
a word for thy lovelace 

joining company he recommended to me to write often and promised to let
me hear quickly from him and that he would write to your lordship and
to all his family round for he said that you had all been more kind to
him than he had deserved 

and so we parted 

i hope my lord for all your noble family's sake that we shall see him
soon return and reform as he promises 

i return your lordship my humble thanks for the honour of your invitation
to m hall the first letter i receive from mr lovelace shall give me
the opportunity of embracing it i am my lord 

your most faithful and obedient servant 
j belford 



letter liv

mr belford to lord m 
thursday morning oct 5 


it may be some satisfaction to your lordship to have a brief account of
what has just now passed between colonel morden and me 

we had a good deal of discourse about the harlowe family and those parts
of the lady's will which still remain unexecuted after which the colonel
addressed himself to me in a manner which gave me some surprise 

he flattered himself he said from my present happy turn and from my
good constitution that i should live a great many years it was
therefore his request that i would consent to be his executor since it
was impossible for him to make a better choice or pursue a better
example than his cousin had set 

his heart he said was in it there were some things in his cousin's will
and his analogous and he had named one person to me with whom he was
sure i would not refuse to be joined and to whom he intended to apply
for his consent when he had obtained mine  intimating as far as i
could gather that it was mr hickman son of sir charles hickman to
whom i know your lordship is not a stranger for he said every one who
was dear to his beloved cousin must be so to him and he knew that the
gentleman who he had thoughts of would have besides my advice and
assistance the advice of one of the most sensible ladies in england  


 what is between crotchets thus     mr belford omitted in the
transcription of this letter to miss howe 


he took my hand seeing me under some surprise you must not hesitate 
much less deny me mr belford indeed you must not two things i will
assure you of that i have as i hope made every thing so clear that you
cannot have any litigation and that i have done so justly and i hope it
will be thought so generously by all my relations that a mind like
your's will rather have pleasure than pain in the execution of this
trust and this is what i think every honest man who hopes to find an
honest man for his executor should do 

i told him that i was greatly obliged to him for his good opinion of me 
that it was so much every man's duty to be an honest man that it could
not be interpreted as vanity to say that i had no doubt to be found so 
but if i accepted of this trust it must be on condition 

i could name no condition he said interrupting me which he would
refuse to comply with 

this condition i told him was that as there was as great a probability
of his being my survivor as i his he would permit me to name him for
mine and in that case a week should not pass before i made my will 

with all his heart he said and the readier as he had no apprehensions
of suddenly dying for what he had done and requested was really the
effect of the satisfaction he had taken in the part i had already acted
as his cousin's executor and in my ability he was pleased to add as
well as in pursuance of his cousin's advice in the preamble of her will 
to wit that this was a work which should be set about in full health 
both of body and mind 

i told him that i was pleased to hear him say that he was not in any
apprehension of suddenly dying as this gave me assurance that he had
laid aside all thoughts of acting contrary to the dying request of his
beloved cousin 

does it argue said he smiling that if i were to pursue a vengeance so
justifiable in my own opinion i must be in apprehension of falling by
mr lovelace's hand i will assure you that i have no fears of that
sort but i know this is an ungrateful subject to you mr lovelace is
your friend and i will allow that a good man may have a friendship for
a bad one so far as to wish him well without countenancing him in his
evil 

i will assure you added he that i have not yet made any resolutions
either way i have told you what force my cousin's repeated requests
have with me hitherto they have with-held me but let us quit this
subject 

this sir  giving me a sealed-up parcel  is my will it is witnessed 
i made no doubt of prevailing upon you to do me the requested favour i
have a duplicate to leave with the other gentleman and an attested copy 
which i shall deposit at my banker's at my return which will be in six
or eight months at farthest i will allow you to make an exchange of
your's if you will have it so i have only now to take leave of my
relations in the country and so god protect you mr belford you will
soon hear of me again 

he then very solemnly embraced me as i did him and we parted 

i heartily congratulate your lordship on the narrow escape each gentleman
has had from the other for i apprehend that they could not have met
without fatal consequences 

time i hope which subdues all things will subdue their resentments i
am my lord 

your lordship's most faithful and obedient servant 
j belford 


several other letters passed between miss howe and mr belford relating
 to the disposition of the papers and letters to the poor's fund 
 and to other articles of the lady's will wherein the method of
 proceeding in each case was adjusted after which the papers were
 returned to mr belford that he might order the two directed
 copies of them to be taken 

in one of these letters mr belford requests miss howe to give the
 character of the friend she so dearly loved a task he imagines 
 that will be as agreeable to herself as worthy of her pen 

i am more especially curious to know  says he what was that
 particular disposition of her time which i find mentioned in a
 letter which i have just dipt into where her sister is enviously
 reproaching her on that score this information may
 enable me  says he to account for what has often surprised me 
 how at so tender an age this admirable lady became mistress of
 such extraordinary and such various qualifications 


 see vol i letter xlii 



letter lv

miss howe to john belford esq 
thursday oct 12 


sir 

i am incapable of doing justice to the character of my beloved friend 
and that not only from want of talents but from grief which i think 
rather increases than diminishes by time and which will not let me sit
down to a task that requires so much thought and a greater degree of
accuracy than i ever believed myself mistress of and yet i so well
approve of your motion that i will throw into your hands a few
materials that may serve by way of supplement as i may say to those
you will be able to collect from the papers themselves from col 
morden's letters to you particularly that of sept 23 and from the
letters of the detestable wretch himself who i find has done her
justice although to his own condemnation all these together will enable
you who seem to be so great an admirer of her virtues to perform the
task and i think better than any person i know but i make it my
request that if you do any thing in this way you will let me see it 
if i find it not to my mind i will add or diminish as justice shall
require she was a wonderful creature from her infancy but i suppose
you intend to give a character of her at those years when she was
qualified to be an example to other young ladies rather than a history
of her life 


 see letter xlv of this volume 


perhaps nevertheless you will choose to give a description of her
person and as you knew not the dear creature when her heart was easy 
i will tell you what yet in part you can confirm 

that her shape was so fine her proportion so exact her features so
regular her complexion so lovely and her whole person and manner so
distinguishedly charming that she could not move without being admired
and followed by the eyes of every one though strangers who never saw
her before col morden's letter above referred to will confirm this 

in her dress she was elegant beyond imitation and generally led the
fashion to all the ladies round her without seeming to intend it and
without being proud of doing so 


 see vol vii letter lxxxi 


she was rather tall than of a middling stature and had a dignity in her
aspect and air that bespoke the mind that animated every feature 

this native dignity as i may call it induced some superficial persons 
who knew not how to account for the reverence which involuntarily filled
their hearts on her appearance to impute pride to her but these were
such as knew that they should have been proud of any one of her
perfections judging therefore by their own narrowness they thought it
impossible that the lady who possessed so many should not think herself
superior to them all indeed i have heard her noble aspect found fault
with as indicating pride and superiority but people awed and
controuled though but by their own consciousness of inferiority will
find fault right or wrong with those whose rectitude of mind and
manners their own culpable hearts give them to be afraid but in the
bad sense of the word miss clarissa harlowe knew not what pride was 

you may if you touch upon this subject throw in these sentences of
her's spoken at different times and on different occasions 

persons of accidental or shadowy merit may be proud but inborn worth
must be always as much above conceit as arrogance 

who can be better or more worthy than they should be and who shall
be proud of talents they give not to themselves 

the darkest and most contemptible ignorance is that of not knowing one's
self and that all we have and all we excel in is the gift of god 

all human excellence is but comparative there are persons who excel us 
as much as we fancy we excel the meanest 

in the general scale of beings the lowest is as useful and as much a
link of the great chain as the highest 

the grace that makes every other grace amiable is humility 

there is but one pride pardonable that of being above doing a base or
dishonourable action 

such were the sentiments by which this admirable young lady endeavoured
to conduct herself and to regulate her conduct to others 

and in truth never were affability and complacency graciousness some
have called it more eminent in any person man or woman than in her to
those who put it in her power to oblige them insomuch that the
benefitted has sometimes not known which to prefer the grace bestowed 
or the manner in which it was conferred 

it has been observed that what was said of henry iv of france might be
said of her manner of refusing a request that she generally sent from
her presence the person refused nearly as well satisfied as if she had
granted it 

then she had such a sacred regard to truth you cannot sir expatiate
too much upon this topic i dare say that in all her letters in all
the letters of the wretch her veracity will not once be found
impeachable although her calamities were so heavy the horrid man's
wiles so subtle and her struggles to free herself from them so active 

her charity was so great that she always chose to defend or acquit where
the fault was not so flagrant that it became a piece of justice to
condemn it and was always an advocate for an absent person whose
discretion was called in question without having given manifest proofs
of indiscretion 

once i remember in a large circle of ladies every one of which  i among
the rest  having censured a generally-reported indiscretion in a young
lady come my miss howe said she  for we had agreed to take each other
to task when either thought the other gave occasion for it and when by
blaming each other we intended a general reprehension which as she used
to say it would appear arrogant or assuming to level more properly   let
me be miss fanny darlington then removing out of the circle and
standing up here i stand unworthy of a seat with the rest of the
company till i have cleared myself and now suppose me to be her let
me hear you charge and do you hear what the poor culprit can say to it
in her own defence and then answering the conjectural and unproved
circumstances by circumstances as fairly to be supposed favourable she
brought off triumphantly the censured lady and so much to every one's
satisfaction that she was led to her chair and voted a double rank in
the circle as the reinstated miss fanny darlington and as miss clarissa
harlowe 

very few persons she used to say would be condemned or even accused 
in the circles of ladies were they present it is generous therefore 
nay it is but just said she to take the part of the absent if not
flagrantly culpable 

but though wisdom was her birthright as i may say yet she had not lived
years enow to pretend to so much experience as to exempt her from the
necessity of sometimes altering her opinion both of persons and things 
but when she found herself obliged to do this she took care that the
particular instance of mistaken worthiness in the person should not
narrow or contract her almost universal charity into general doubt or
jealousy an instance of what i mean occurs to my memory 

being upbraided by a severe censure with a person's proving base whom
she had frequently defended and by whose baseness my beloved friend was
a sufferer you madam  said she had more penetration than such a
young creature as i can pretend to have but although human depravity
may i doubt oftener justify those who judge harshly than human
rectitude can those who judge favourably yet will i not part with my
charity nevertheless for the future i will endeavour in cases where
the judgment of my elders is against me to make mine consistent with
caution and prudence 

indeed when she was convinced of any error or mistake however
seemingly derogatory to her judgment and sagacity no one was ever so
acknowledging so ingenuous as she it was a merit  she used to say 
next in degree to that of having avoided error frankly to own an error 
and that the offering at an excuse in a blameable manner was the
undoubted mark of a disingenuous if not of a perverse mind 

but i ought to add on this head  of her great charity where character
was concerned and where there was room for charity   that she was always
deservedly severe in her reprehensions of a wilful and studied vileness 
how could she then forgive the wretch by whose premeditated villany she
was entangled 

you must every where insist upon it that had it not been for the stupid
persecutions of her relations she never would have been in the power of
that horrid lovelace and yet on several occasions she acknowledged
frankly that were person and address and alliance to be allowedly the
principal attractives in the choice of a lover it would not have been
difficult for her eye to mislead her heart 

when she was last with me three happy weeks together in every visit
the wretch made her he left her more dissatisfied with him than in the
former and yet his behaviour before her was too specious to have been
very exceptionable to a woman who had a less share of that charming
delicacy and of that penetration which so much distinguished her 

in obedience to the commands of her gloomy father on his allowing her to
be my guest for that last time  as it most unhappily proved   she never
would see him out of my company and would often say when he was gone 
o my nancy this is not the man  at other times gay giddy creature 
he has always something to be forgiven for  at others this man will
much sooner excite one's fears than attract one's love  and then would
she repeat this is not the man all that the world says of him cannot
be untrue but what title have i to call him to account who intend not
to have him 

in short had she been left to a judgment and discretion which nobody
ever questioned who had either she would soon have discovered enough of
him to cause her to discard him for ever 

she was an admirable mistress of all the graces of elocution the hand
she wrote for the neat and free cut of her letters like her mind 
solid and above all flourish for its fairness evenness and
swiftness distinguished her as much as the correctness of her
orthography and even punctuation from the generality of her own sex 
and left her none among the most accurate of the other who excelled
her 

and here you may if you please take occasion to throw in one hint for
the benefit of such of our sex as are too careless in their orthography 
 a consciousness of a defect which generally keeps them from writing   
she was used to say it was a proof that a woman understood the
derivation as well as sense of the words she used and that she stopt not
at sound when she spelt accurately 

on this head you may take notice that it was always matter of surprise
to her that the sex are generally so averse as they are to writing 
since the pen next to the needle of all employments is the most
proper and best adapted to their geniuses and this as well for
improvement as amusement who sees not  would she say that those
women who take delight in writing excel the men in all the graces of the
familiar style the gentleness of their minds the delicacy of their
sentiments improved by the manner of their education and the
liveliness of their imaginations qualify them to a high degree of
preference for this employment while men of learning as they are
called that is to say of mere learning aiming to get above that
natural ease and freedom which distinguish this and indeed every other
kind of writing when they think they have best succeeded are got
above or rather beneath all natural beauty 

then stiffened and starched  let me add  into dry and indelectable
affectation one sort of these scholars assume a style as rough as
frequently are their manners they spangle over their productions with
metaphors they tumble into bombast the sublime with them lying in
words and not in sentiment they fancy themselves most exalted when
least understood and down they sit fully satisfied with their own
performances and call them masculine while a second sort aiming at
wit that wicked misleader forfeit all title to judgment and a third 
sinking into the classical pits there poke and scramble about never
seeking to show genius of their own all their lives spent in
common-place quotation fit only to write notes and comments upon other
people's texts all their pride that they know those beauties of two
thousand years old in another tongue which they can only admire but not
imitate in their own 

and these truly must be learned men and despisers of our insipid sex 

but i need not mention the exceptions which my beloved friend always made
 and to which i subscribe  in favour of men of sound learning true
taste and extensive abilities nor in particular her respect even to
reverence for gentlemen of the cloath which i dare say will appear in
every paragraph of her letters wherever any of the clergy are mentioned 
indeed the pious dr lewen the worthy dr blome the ingenious mr 
arnold and mr tompkins gentlemen whom she names in one article of her
will as learned divines with whom she held an early correspondence well
deserved her respect since to their conversation and correspondence she
owed many of her valuable acquirements 

nor were the little slights she would now-and-then following as i must
own my lead put upon such mere scholars  and her stupid and pedantic
brother was one of those who deserved those slights  as despised not only
our sex but all such as had not had their opportunities of being
acquainted with the parts of speech  i cannot speak low enough of such  
and with the dead languages owing to that contempt which some affect for
what they have not been able to master for she had an admirable facility
for learning languages and read with great ease both in italian and
french she had begun to apply herself to latin and having such a
critical knowledge of her own tongue and such a foundation from the two
others would soon have made herself an adept in it 

but notwithstanding all her acquirements she was an excellent economist
and housewife and those qualifications you must take notice she was
particularly fond of inculcating upon all her reading and writing
companions of the sex for it was a maxim with her that a woman who
neglects the useful and the elegant which distinguish her own sex for
the sake of obtaining the learning which is supposed more peculiar to the
other incurs more contempt by what she foregoes than she gains credit
by what she acquires 

all that a woman can learn  she used to say  expatiating on this
maxim   above the useful knowledge proper to her sex let her learn 
this will show that she is a good housewife of her time and that she has
not a narrow or confined genius but then let her not give up for these
those more necessary and therefore not meaner employments which will
qualify her to be a good mistress of a family a good wife and a good
mother for what can be more disgraceful to a woman than either through
negligence of dress to be found a learned slattern or through
ignorance of household-management to be known to be a stranger to
domestic economy 

she would have it indeed sometimes from the frequent ill use learned
women make of that respectable acquirement that it was no great matter
whether the sex aimed at any thing but excelling in the knowledge of the
beauties and graces of their mother-tongue and once she said that this
was field enough for a woman and an ampler was but endangering her
family usefulness but i who think our sex inferior in nothing to the
other but in want of opportunities of which the narrow-minded mortals
industriously seek to deprive us lest we should surpass them as much in
what they chiefly value themselves upon as we do in all the graces of a
fine imagination could never agree with her in that and yet i was
entirely of her opinion that those women who were solicitous to obtain
that knowledge of learning which they supposed would add to their
significance in sensible company and in their attainment of it imagined
themselves above all domestic usefulness deservedly incurred the
contempt which they hardly ever failed to meet with 

perhaps you will not think it amiss further to observe on this head as
it will now show that precept and example always went hand and hand with
her that her dairy at her grandfather's was the delight of every one who
saw it and she of all who saw her in it 

her grandfather in honour of her dexterity and of her skill in all the
parts of the dairy management as well as of the elegance of the offices
allotted for that use would have his seat before known by the name of
the grove to be called the dairy-house she had an easy convenient 
and graceful habit made on purpose which she put on when she employed
herself in these works and it was noted of her that in the same hour
that she appeared to be a most elegant dairy-maid she was when called
to a change of dress the finest lady that ever graced a circle 


 see vol i letter ii 


her grandfather father mother uncles aunt and even her brother and
sister made her frequent visits there and were delighted with her
silent ease and unaffected behaviour in her works for she always out of
modesty chose rather the operative than the directive part that she
might not discourage the servant whose proper business it was 

each was fond of a regale from her hands in her dairy-house her mother
and aunt hervey generally admired her in silence that they might not
give uneasiness to her sister a spiteful perverse unimitating thing 
who usually looked upon her all the time with speechless envy 
now-and-then however the pouting creature would suffer extorted and
sparing praise to burst open her lips though looking at the same time
like saul meditating the pointed javelin at the heart of david the glory
of his kingdom and now methinks i see my angel-friend too superior
to take notice of her gloom courting her acceptance of the milk-white
curd from hands more pure than that 

her skill and dexterity in every branch of family management seem to be
the only excellence of her innumerable ones which she owed to her family 
whose narrowness immensely rich and immensely carking put them upon
indulging her in the turn she took to this part of knowledge while her
elder sister affected dress without being graceful in it and the fine
lady which she could never be and which her sister was without studying
for it or seeming to know she was so 

it was usual with the one sister when company was expected to be half
the morning dressing while the other would give directions for the whole
business and entertainment of the day and then go up to her
dressing-room and before she could well be missed  having all her
things in admirable order   come down fit to receive company and with
all that graceful ease and tranquillity as if she had nothing else to
think of 

long after her  hours perhaps of previous preparation having passed  
down would come rustling and bustling the tawdry and awkward bella 
disordering more her native disorderliness at the sight of her serene
sister by her sullen envy to see herself so much surpassed with such
little pains and in a sixth part of the time 

yet was this admirable creature mistress of all these domestic
qualifications without the least intermixture of narrowness she knew
how to distinguish between frugality a necessary virtue and
niggardliness an odious vice and used to say that to define
generosity it must be called the happy medium betwixt parsimony and
profusion 

she was the most graceful reader i ever knew she added by her
melodious voice graces to those she found in the parts of books she read
out to her friends and gave grace and significance to others where they
were not she had no tone no whine her accent was always admirably
placed the emphasis she always forcibly laid as the subject required 
no buskin elevation no tragedy pomp could mislead her and yet poetry
was poetry indeed when she read it 

but if her voice was melodious when she read it was all harmony when she
sung and the delight she gave by that and by her skill and great
compass was heightened by the ease and gracefulness of her air and
manner and by the alacrity with which she obliged 

nevertheless she generally chose rather to hear others sing or play than
either to play or sing herself 

she delighted to give praise where deserved yet she always bestowed it
in such a manner as gave not the least suspicion that she laid out for a
return of it to herself though so universally allowed to be her due 

she had a talent of saying uncommon things in such an easy manner that
every body thought they could have said the same and which yet required
both genius and observation to say them 

even severe things appeared gentle though they lost not their force 
from the sweetness of her air and utterance and the apparent benevolence
of her purpose 

we form the truest judgment of persons by their behaviour on the most
familiar occasions i will give an instance or two of the correction she
favoured me with on such a one 

when very young i was guilty of the fault of those who want to be
courted to sing she cured me of it at the first of our happy intimacy 
by her own example and by the following correctives occasionally yet
privately enforced 

well my dear shall we take you at your word shall we suppose that
you sing but indifferently is not however the act of obliging the
company so worthy preferable to the talent of singing and shall not
young ladies endeavour to make up for their defects in one part of
education by their excellence in another 

again you must convince us by attempting to sing that you cannot
sing and then we will rid you not only of present but of future
importunity  an indulgence however let me add that but tolerable
singers do not always wish to meet with 

again i know you will favour us by and by and what do you by your
excuses but raise our expectations and enhance your own difficulties 

at another time has not this accomplishment been a part of your
education my nancy how then for your own honour can we allow of
your excuses 

and i once pleading a cold the usual pretence of those who love to be
entreated sing however my dear as well as you can the greater the
difficulty to you the higher the compliment to the company do you
think you are among those who know not how to make allowances you should
sing my love lest there should be any body present who may think your
excuses owing to affectation 

at another time when i had truly observed that a young lady present sung
better than i and that therefore i chose not to sing before that lady
 fie said she drawing me on one side is not this pride my nancy 
does it not look as if your principal motive to oblige was to obtain
applause a generous mind will not scruple to give advantage to a person
of merit though not always to her own advantage and yet she will have
a high merit in doing that supposing this excellent person absent who 
my dear if your example spread shall sing after you you know every
one else must be but as a foil to you indeed i must have you as much
superior to other ladies in these smaller points as you are in greater 
so she was pleased to say to shame me she was so much above reserve as
disguise so communicative that no young lady could be in her company
half an hour and not carry away instruction with her whatever was the
topic yet all sweetly insinuated nothing given with the air of
prescription so that while she seemed to ask a question for
information-sake she dropt in the needful instruction and left the
instructed unable to decide whether the thought which being started 
she the instructed could improve came primarily from herself or from
the sweet instructress 

she had a pretty hand at drawing which she obtained with very little
instruction her time was too much taken up to allow though to so fine
an art the attention which was necessary to make her greatly excel in
it and she used to say that she was afraid of aiming at too many
things for fear she should not be tolerable at any thing 

for her years and her opportunities she was an extraordinary judge of
painting in this as in every thing else nature was her art her art
was nature she even prettily performed in it her grandfather for
this reason bequeathed to her all the family pictures charming was her
fancy alike sweet and easy was every touch of her pencil and her pen 
yet her judgment exceeded her performance she did not practise enough
to excel in the executive part she could not in every thing excel 
but upon the whole she knew what every subject required according to
the nature of it in other words was an absolute mistress of the
should-be 

to give a familiar instance for the sake of young ladies she untaught 
observed when but a child that the sun moon and stars never appeared
at once and were therefore never to be in one piece that bears tigers 
lions were not natives of an english climate and should not therefore
have place in an english landscape that these ravagers of the forest
consorted not with lambs kids or fawns nor kites hawks and vultures 
with doves partridges or pheasants 

and alas she knew before she was nineteen years of age by fatal
experience she knew that all these beasts and birds of prey were
outdone in treacherous cruelty by man vile barbarous plotting 
destructive man who infinitely less excusable than those destroys 
through wantonness and sport what those only destroy through hunger and
necessity 

the mere pretenders to those branches of science which she aimed at
acquiring she knew how to detect and from all nature propriety 
another word for nature was as i have hinted her law as it is the
foundation of all true judgment but nevertheless she was always
uneasy if what she said exposed those pretenders to knowledge even in
their absence to the ridicule of lively spirits 

let the modern ladies who have not any one of her excellent qualities 
whose whole time in the short days they generally make and in the
inverted night and day where they make them longer is wholly spent in
dress visits cards plays operas and musical entertainments wonder
at what i have written and shall further write and let them look upon
it as an incredible thing that when at a mature age they cannot boast
one of her perfections there should have been a lady so young who had
so many 

these must be such as know not how she employed her time and cannot form
the least idea of what may be done in those hours in which they lie
enveloped with the shades of death as she used to call sleep 

but before i come to mention the distribution she usually made of her
time let me say a few words upon another subject in which she excelled
all the young ladies i ever knew 

this was her skill in almost all sorts of fine needleworks of which 
however i shall say the less since possibly you will find it mentioned
in some of the letters 

that piece which she bequeaths to her cousin morden is indeed a capital
piece a performance so admirable that that gentleman's father who
resided chiefly abroad was as is mentioned in her will very desirous
to obtain it in order to carry it to italy with him to show the curious
of other countries as he used to say for the honour of his own that
the cloistered confinement was not necessary to make english women excel
in any of those fine arts upon which nuns and recluses value themselves 

her quickness at these sort of works was astonishing and a great
encouragement to herself to prosecute them 

mr morden's father would have been continually making her presents 
would she have permitted him to do so and he used to call them and so
did her grandfather tributes due to a merit so sovereign and not
presents 

as to her diversions the accomplishments and acquirements she was
mistress of will show what they must have been she was far from being
fond of cards the fashionable foible of modern ladies nor as will be
easily perceived from what i have said and more from what i shall
further say had she much time for play she never therefore promoted
their being called for and often insensibly diverted the company from
them by starting some entertaining subject when she could do it without
incurring the imputation of particularity 

indeed very few of her intimates would propose cards if they could
engage her to read to talk to touch the keys or to sing when any new
book or new piece of music came down but when company was so
numerous that conversation could not take that agreeable turn which it
oftenest does among four or five friends of like years and inclinations 
and it became in a manner necessary to detach off some of it to make the
rest better company she would not refuse to play if upon casting in 
it fell to her lot and then she showed that her disrelish to cards was
the effect of choice only and that she was an easy mistress of every
genteel game played with them but then she always declared against
playing high except for trifles  she used to say she would not
submit to chance what she was already sure of 

at other times she should make her friends a very ill compliment  she
said if she supposed they would wish to be possessed of what of right
belonged to her and she should be very unworthy if she desired to make
herself a title to what was theirs 

high gaming in short  she used to say was a sordid vice an
immorality the child of avarice and a direct breach of that
commandment which forbids us to covet what is our neighbour's 

she was exceedingly charitable the only one of her family that knew the
meaning of the word and this with regard both to the souls and the
bodies of those who were the well-chosen objects of her benevolence she
kept a list of these whom she used to call her poor entering one upon
it as another was provided for by death or any other way but always
made a reserve nevertheless for unforeseen cases and for accidental
distresses and it must be owned that in the prudent distribution of
them she had neither example nor equal 

the aged the blind the lame the widow the orphan the unsuccessful
industrious were particularly the objects of it and the contributing
to the schooling of some to the putting out to trades and husbandry the
children of others of the labouring or needy poor and setting them
forward at the expiration of their servitude were her great delights as
was the giving good books to others and when she had opportunity the
instructing the poorer sort of her honest neighbours and father's
tenants in the use of them that charity  she used to say which
provides for the morals as well as for the bodily wants of the poor 
gives a double benefit to the public as it adds to the number of the
hopeful what it takes from that of the profligate and can there be in
the eyes of that god she was wont to say who requires nothing so much
from us as acts of beneficence to one another a charity more worthy 

her uncle antony when he came to settle in england with his vast fortune
obtained in the indies used to say this girl by her charities will
bring down a blessing upon us all  and it must be owned they trusted
pretty much to this presumption 

but i need not say more on this head nor perhaps was it necessary to say
so much since the charitable bequests in her will sufficiently set forth
her excellence in this branch of duty 

she was extremely moderate in her diet quantity in food  she used to
say was more to be regarded than quality that a full meal was the
great enemy both to study and industry that a well-built house required
but little repairs 

but this moderation in her diet she enjoyed with a delicate frame of
body a fine state of health was always serene lively cheerful of
course and i never knew but of one illness she had and that was by a
violent cold caught in an open chaise by a sudden storm of hail and
rain in a place where was no shelter and which threw her into a fever 
attended with dangerous symptoms that no doubt were lightened by her
temperance but which gave her friends who then knew her value infinite
apprehensions for her 


 in her common-place book she has the following note upon the
recollection of this illness in the time of her distress 

in a dangerous illness with which i was visited a few years before i
had the unhappiness to know this ungrateful man  would to heaven i had
died in it   my bed was surrounded by my dear relations father mother 
brother sister my two uncles weeping kneeling round me then put up
their vows to heaven for my recovery and i fearing that i should drag
down with me to my grave one or other of my sorrowing friends wished and
prayed to recover for their sakes alas how shall parents in such cases
know what to wish for how happy for them and for me had i then been
denied to their prayers but now i am eased of that care all those
dear relations are living still but not one of them such as they think 
has been the heinousness of my error but far from being grieved would
rejoice to hear of my death 


in all her readings and her conversations upon them she was fonder of
finding beauties than blemishes and chose to applaud but authors and
books where she could find the least room for it yet she used to
lament that certain writers of the first class who were capable of
exalting virtue and of putting vice out of countenance too generally
employed themselves in works of imagination only upon subjects merely
speculative disinteresting and unedifying from which no useful moral or
example could be drawn 

but she was a severe censurer of pieces of a light or indecent turn 
which had a tendency to corrupt the morals of youth to convey polluted
images or to wound religion whether in itself or through the sides of
its professors and this whoever were the authors and how admirable
soever the execution she often pitied the celebrated dr swift for so
employing his admirable pen that a pure eye was afraid of looking into
his works and a pure ear of hearing any thing quoted from them such
authors  she used to say were not honest to their own talents nor
grateful to the god who gave them  nor would she on these occasions 
admit their beauties as a palliation on the contrary she held it as an
aggravation of their crime that they who are so capable of mending the
heart should in any places show a corrupt one in themselves which must
weaken the influences of their good works and pull down with one hand
what they build up with the other 

all she said and all she did was accompanied with a natural ease and
dignity which set her above affectation or the suspicion of it 
insomuch that that degrading fault so generally imputed to a learned
woman was never laid to her charge for with all her excellencies she
was forwarder to hear than speak and hence no doubt derived no small
part of her improvement 

although she was well read in the english french and italian poets and
had read the best translations of the latin classics yet seldom did she
quote or repeat from them either in her letters or conversation though
exceedingly happy in a tenacious memory principally through modesty and
to avoid the imputation of that affectation which i have just mentioned 

mr wyerley once said of her she had such a fund of knowledge of her
own and made naturally such fine observations upon persons and things 
being capable by the egg  that was his familiar expression   of judging
of the bird that she had seldom either room or necessity for foreign
assistances 

but it was plain from her whole conduct and behaviour that she had not
so good an opinion of herself however deserved since whenever she was
urged to give her sentiments on any subject although all she thought fit
to say was clear an intelligible yet she seemed in haste to have done
speaking her reason for it i know was twofold that she might not
lose the benefit of other people's sentiments by engrossing the
conversation and lest as were her words she should be praised into
loquaciousness and so forfeit the good opinion which a person always
maintains with her friends who knows when she has said enough it was 
finally a rule with her to leave her hearers wishing her to say more 
rather than to give them cause to show by their inattention an
uneasiness that she had said so much  

you are curious to know the particular distribution of her time which
you suppose will help you to account for what you own yourself surprised
at to wit how so young a lady could make herself mistress of so many
accomplishments 

i will premise that she was from infancy inured to rise early in a
morning by an excellent and as i may say a learned woman mrs 
norton to whose care wisdom and example she was beholden for the
ground-work of her taste and acquirements which meeting with such
assistances from the divines i have named and with such a genius made
it the less wonder that she surpassed most of her age and sex 

her sex did i say what honour to the other does this imply when one
might challenge the proudest pedant of them all to say he has been
disciplined into greater improvement than she had made from the mere
force of genius and application but it is demonstrable to all who know
how to make observations on their acquaintance of both sexes arrogant as
some are of their superficialities that a lady at eighteen take the
world through is more prudent and conversable than a man at twenty-five 
i can prove this by nineteen instances out of twenty in my own knowledge 
yet how do these poor boasters value themselves upon the advantages their
education gives them who has not seen some one of them just come from
the university disdainfully smile at a mistaken or ill-pronounced word
from a lady when her sense has been clear and her sentiments just and
when he could not himself utter a single sentence fit to be repeated but
what he had borrowed from the authors he had been obliged to study as a
painful exercise to slow and creeping parts but how i digress 

this excellent young lady used to say it was incredible to think what
might be done by early rising and by long days well filled up 

it may be added that she had calculated according to the practice of too
many she had actually lived more years at sixteen than they had at
twenty-six 

she was of opinion that no one could spend their time properly who did
not live by some rule who did not appropriate the hours as nearly as
might be to particular purposes and employments 

in conformity to this self-set lesson the usual distribution of the
twenty-four hours when left to her own choice were as follows 


 for rest she allotted six hours only 

she thought herself not so well and so clear in her intellects  so much
alive she used to say   if she exceeded this proportion if she slept
not she chose to rise sooner and in winter had her fire laid and a
taper ready burning to light it not loving to give trouble to the
servants whose harder work and later hours of going to bed  she used
to say required consideration 

i have blamed her for her greater regard to them than to herself but
this was her answer i have my choice who can wish for more why
should i oppress others to gratify myself you see what free-will
enables one to do while imposition would make a light burden heavy 


 her first three morning hours

were generally passed in her study and in her closet duties and were
occasionally augmented by those she saved from rest and in these passed
her epistolary amusements 

 two hours she generally allotted to domestic management 

these at different times of the day as occasions required all the
housekeeper's bills in ease of her mother passing through her hands 
for she was a perfect mistress of the four principal rules of arithmetic 

 five hours to her needle drawings music etc 

in these she included the assistance and inspection she gave to her own
servants and to her sister's servants in the needle-works required for
the family for her sister as i have above hinted is a modern in
these she also included dr lewen's conversation-visits with whom
likewise she held a correspondence by letters that reverend gentleman
delighted himself and her twice or thrice a week if his health
permitted with these visits and she always preferred his company to any
other engagement 

 two hours she allotted to her two first meals 

but if conversation or the desire of friends or the falling in of
company or guests required it to be otherwise she never scrupled to
oblige and would on such occasions borrow as she called it from other
distributions and as she found it very hard not to exceed in this
appropriation she put down

 one hour more to dinner-time conversation 

to be added or subtracted as occasions offered or the desire of her
friends required and yet found it difficult as she often said to keep
this account even especially if dr lewen obliged them with his company
at their table which however he seldom did for being a
valetudinarian and in a regimen he generally made his visits in the
afternoon 

 one hour to visits to the neighbouring poor 

to a select number of whom and to their children she used to give brief
instructions and good books and as this happened not every day and
seldom above twice a-week she had two or three hours at a time to bestow
in this benevolent employment 

 the remaining four hours

were occasionally allotted to supper to conversation or to reading
after supper to the family this allotment she called her fund upon
which she used to draw to satisfy her other debits and in this she
included visits received and returned shows spectacles etc which in a
country life not occurring every day she used to think a great
allowance no less than two days in six for amusements only and she was
wont to say that it was hard if she could not steal time out of this
fund for an excursion of even two or three days in a month 

if it be said that her relations or the young neighbouring ladies had
but little of her time it will be considered that besides these four
hours in the twenty-four great part of the time she was employed in her
needle-works she used to converse as she worked and it was a custom she
had introduced among her acquaintance that the young ladies in their
visits used frequently in a neighbourly way in the winter evenings
especially to bring their work with them and one of half a dozen of her
select acquaintance used by turns to read to the rest as they were at
work 

this was her usual method when at her own command for six days in the
week 


 the seventh day

she kept as it ought to be kept and as some part of it was frequently
employed in works of mercy the hour she allotted to visiting the
neighbouring poor was occasionally supplied from this day and added to
her fund 

but i must observe that when in her grandfather's lifetime she was three
or four weeks at a time his housekeeper or guest as also at either of
her uncles her usual distribution of time was varied but still she had
an eye to it as nearly as circumstances would admit 

when i had the happiness of having her for my guest for a fortnight or
so she likewise dispensed with her rules in mere indulgence to my
foibles and idler habits for i also though i had the benefit of an
example i so much admired am too much of a modern yet as to morning
risings i had corrected myself by such a precedent in the summer-time 
and can witness to the benefit i found by it in my health as also to the
many useful things i was enabled by that means with ease and pleasure 
to perform and in her account-book i have found this memorandum since
her ever-to-be-lamented death from such a day to such a day all
holidays at my dear miss howe's  at her return account resumed such
a day  naming it and then she proceeded regularly as before 

once-a-week she used to reckon with herself when if within the 144
hours contained in the six days she had made her account even she
noted it accordingly if otherwise she carried the debit to the next
week's account as thus debtor to the article of the benevolent visits 
so many hours and so of the rest 

but it was always an especial part of her care that whether visiting or
visited she showed in all companies an entire ease satisfaction and
cheerfulness as if she had kept no such particular account and as if
she did not make herself answerable to herself for her occasional
exceedings 

this method which to others will appear perplexing and unnecessary her
early hours and custom had made easy and pleasant to her 

and indeed as i used to tell her greatly as i admired her in all
methods i could not bring myself to this might i have had the world for
my reward 

i had indeed too much impatience in my temper to observe such a
regularity in accounting between me and myself i satisfied myself in a
lump-account as i may call it if i had nothing greatly wrong to
reproach myself when i looked back on a past week as she had taught me
to do 

for she used indulgently to say i do not think all i do necessary for
another to do nor even for myself but when it is more pleasant for me
to keep such an account than to let it alone why may i not proceed in
my supererogatories there can be no harm in it it keeps up my
attention to accounts which one day may be of use to me in more material
instances those who will not keep a strict account seldom long keep
any i neglect not more useful employments for it and it teaches me to
be covetous of time the only thing of which we can be allowably
covetous since we live but once in this world and when gone are gone
from it for ever 

she always reconciled the necessity under which these interventions as
she called them laid her of now-and-then breaking into some of her
appropriations saying that was good sense and good manners too in
the common lesson when at rome do as they do at rome and that to be
easy of persuasion in matters where one could oblige without endangering
virtue or worthy habits was an apostolical excellency since if a
person conformed with a view of making herself an interest in her
friend's affections in order to be heeded in greater points it was
imitating his example who became all things to all men that he might
gain some  nor is it to be doubted had life been spared her that the
sweetness of her temper and her cheerful piety would have made virtue
and religion appear so lovely that her example would have had no small
influence upon the minds and manners of those who would have had the
honour of conversing with her 

o mr belford i can write no further on this subject for looking
into the account-book for other particulars i met with a most affecting
memorandum which being written on the extreme edge of the paper with a
fine pen and in the dear creature's smallest hand i saw not before 
this it is written i suppose at some calamitous period after the day
named in it help me to curse to blast the monster who gave occasion for
it 

 april 10 the account concluded 
 and with it all my worldly hopes and prospects 


 


i take up my pen but not to apologize for my execration once more i
pray to god to avenge me of him me i say for mine is the loss her's
the gain 

o sir you did not you could not know her as i knew her never was
such an excellence so warm yet so cool a friend so much what i wish
to be but never shall be for alas my stay my adviser my monitress 
my directress is gone for ever gone she honoured me with the title
of the sister of her heart but i was only so in the love i bore her a
love beyond a sister's infinitely beyond her sister's in the hatred i
have to every mean and sordid action and in my love of virtue for 
otherwise i am of a high and haughty temper as i have acknowledged
heretofore and very violent in my passions 

in short she was the nearest perfection of any creature i ever knew 
she never preached to me lessons which she practised not herself she
lived the life she taught all humility meekness self-accusing others
acquitting though the shadow of the fault was hardly hers the substance
their's whose only honour was their relation to her 

to lose such a friend such a guide if ever my violence was
justifiable it is upon this recollection for she lived only to make me
sensible of my failings but not long enough to enable me to conquer
them as i was resolved to endeavour to do 

once more then let me execrate but now violence and passion again
predominate and how can it be otherwise 

but i force myself from the subject having lost the purpose for which i
resumed my pen 

a howe 



letter lvi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
paris oct 14 


 timor and minae
 scandunt eodum quo dominus neque
 decedit aerata triremi and
 post equitem sedet atra cura 

in a language so expressive as the english i hate the pedantry of
tagging or prefacing what i write with latin scraps and ever was a
censurer of the motto-mongers among our weekly and daily scribblers 
but these verses of horace are so applicable to my case that whether
on ship-board whether in my post-chaise or in my inn at night i am
not able to put them out of my head dryden once i thought said very
well in these bouncing lines 

 man makes his fate according to his mind 
 the weak low spirit fortune makes her slave 
 but she's a drudge when hector'd by the brave 
 if fate weave common thread i'll change the doom 
 and with new purple weave a nobler loom 

and in these 

 let fortune empty her whole quiver on me 
 i have a soul that like an ample shield 
 can take in all and verge enough for more 
 fate was not mine nor am i fate's 
 souls know no conquerors 

but in the first quoted lines considering them closely there is nothing
but blustering absurdity in the other the poet says not truth for
conscience is the conqueror of souls at least it is the conqueror of
mine and who ever thought it a narrow one but this is occasioned
partly by poring over the affecting will and posthumous letter what an
army of texts has she drawn up in array against me in the letter but
yet jack do they not show me that two or three thousand years ago 
there were as wicked fellows as myself they do and that's some
consolation 

but the generosity of her mind displayed in both is what stings me most 
and the more still as it is now out of my power any way in the world to
be even with her 

i ought to have written to you sooner but i loitered two days at calais 
for an answer to a letter i wrote to engage my former travelling valet 
de la tour an ingenious ready fellow as you have heard me say i have
engaged him and he is now with me 

i shall make no stay here but intend for some of the electoral courts 
that of bavaria i think will engage me longest perhaps i may step out
of my way if i can be out of my way any where to those of dresden and
berlin and it is not impossible that you may have one letter from me at
vienna and then perhaps i may fall down into italy by the tyrol and
so taking turin in my way return to paris where i hope to see mowbray
and tourville nor do i despair of you 

this a good deal differs from the plan i gave you but you may expect to
hear from me as i move and whether i shall pursue this route or the
other 

i have my former lodgings in the rue st antoine which i shall hold 
notwithstanding my tour so they will be ready to accommodate any two of
you if you come hither before my return and for this i have
conditioned 

i write to charlotte and that is writing to all my relations at once 

do thou jack inform me duly of every thing that passes particularly 
how thou proceededst in thy reformation-scheme how mowbray and tourville
go on in my absence whether thou hast any chance for a wife  i am the
more solicitous on this head because thou seemest to think that thy
mortification will not be complete nor thy reformation secure till thou
art shackled   how the harlowes proceed in their penitentials if miss
howe be married or near being so how honest doleman goes on with his
empiric now he has dismissed his regulars or they him and if any
likelihood of his perfect recovery be sure be very minute for every
trifling occurrence relating to those we value becomes interesting when
we are at a distance from them finally prepare thou to piece thy
broken thread if thou wouldst oblige

thy
lovelace 



letter lvii

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
london oct 25 


i write to show you that i am incapable of slighting even the minutest
requests of an absent and distant friend yet you may believe that there
cannot be any great alterations in the little time that you have been out
of england with respect to the subjects of your inquiry nevertheless i
will answer to each for the reason above given and for the reason you
mention that even trifles and chit-chat are agreeable from friend to
friend and of friends and even of those to whom we give the importance
of deeming them our foes when we are abroad 

first then as to my reformation-scheme as you call it i hope i go on
very well i wish you had entered upon the like and could say so too 
you would then find infinitely more peace of mind than you are likely
ever otherwise to be acquainted with when i look back upon the sweep
that has been made among us in the two or three past years and forward
upon what may still happen i hardly think myself secure though of late
i have been guided by other lights than those of sense and appetite 
which have hurried so many of our confraternity into worldly ruin if not
into eternal perdition 

i am very earnest in my wishes to be admitted into the nuptial state 
but i think i ought to pass some time as a probationary till by
steadiness in my good resolutions i can convince some woman whom i
could love and honour and whose worthy example might confirm my morals 
that there is one libertine who had the grace to reform before age or
disease put it out of his power to sin on 

the harlowes continue inconsolable and i dare say will to the end of
their lives 

miss howe is not yet married but i have reason to think will soon i
have the honour of corresponding with her and the more i know of her 
the more i admire the nobleness of her mind she must be conscious that
she is superior to half our sex and to most of her own which may make
her give way to a temper naturally hasty and impatient but if she meet
with condescension in her man  and who would not veil to a superiority
so visible if it be not exacted with arrogance   i dare say she will
make an excellent wife 

as to doleman the poor man goes on trying and hoping with his empiric 
i cannot but say that as the latter is a sensible and judicious man and
not rash opinionative or over-sanguine i have great hopes little as i
think of quacks and nostrum-mongers in general that he will do him good 
if his case will admit of it my reasons are that the man pays a
regular and constant attendance upon him watches with his own eye 
every change and new symptom of his patient's malady varies his
applications as the indications vary fetters not himself to rules laid
down by the fathers of the art who lived many hundred years ago when
diseases and the causes of them were different as the modes of living
were different from what they are now as well as climates and accidents 
that he is to have his reward not in daily fees but after the first
five guineas for medicines in proportion as the patient himself shall
find amendment 

as to mowbray and tourville what novelties can be expected in so short
a time from men who have not sense enough to strike out or pursue new
lights either good or bad now especially that you are gone who were
the soul of all enterprise and in particular their soul besides i see
them but seldom i suppose they'll be at paris before you can return
from germany for they cannot live without you and you gave them such a
specimen of your recovered volatility in the last evening's
conversation as delighted them and concerned me 

i wish with all my heart that thou wouldst bend thy course toward the
pyraneans i should then if thou writest to thy cousin montague an
account of what is most observable in thy tour put in for a copy of thy
letters i wonder thou wilt not since then thy subjects would be as new
to thyself as to

thy
belford 



letter lviii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
paris oct 16 27 


i follow my last of the 14 25th on occasion of a letter just now come to
hand from joseph leman the fellow is conscience ridden jack and tells
me that he cannot rest either day or night for the mischiefs which he
fears he has been or may still further be the means of doing  he
wishes if it please god and if it please me that he had never seen my
honour's face 

and what is the cause of his present concern as to his own particular 
what but the slights and contempts which he receives from every one of
the harlowes from those particularly he says whom he has endeavoured
to serve as faithfully as his engagements to me would let him serve them 
and i always made him believe he tells me poor weak soul as he was
from his cradle that serving me was serving both in the long run 
but this and the death of his dear young lady is a grief he declares 
that he shall never claw off were he to love to the age of matthew
salem althoff and howsomever he is sure that he shall not live a
month to an end being strangely pined and his stomach nothing like what
it was and mrs betty being also now she has got his love very cross
and slighting but thank his god for punishing her she is in a poor
way hersell 

but the chief occasion of troubling my honour now is not his own griefs
only althoff they are very great but to prevent further mischiefs to
me for he can assure me that colonel morden has set out from them all 
with a full resolution to have his will of me and he is well assured 
that he said and swore to it as how he was resolved that he would
either have my honour's heart's-blood or i should have his or some
such-like sad threatenings and that all the family rejoice in it and
hope i shall come short home 

this is the substance of joseph's letter and i have one from mowbray 
which has a hint to the same effect and i recollect now that you were
very importunate with me to go to madrid rather than to france and
italy the last evening we passed together 

what i desire of you is by the first dispatch to let me faithfully
know all that you know on this head 

i can't bear to be threatened jack nor shall any man unquestioned 
give himself airs in my absence if i know it that shall make me look
mean in any body's eyes that shall give friends pain for me that shall
put them upon wishing me to change my intentions or my plan to avoid
him upon such despicable terms as these think you that i could bear to
live 

but why if such were his purpose did he not let me know it before i
left england was he unable to work himself up to a resolution till he
knew me to be out of the kingdom 

as soon as i can inform myself where to direct to him i will write to
know his purpose for i cannot bear suspense in such a case as this that
solemn act were it even to be marriage or hanging which must be done
to-morrow i had rather should be done to-day my mind tires and sickens
with impatience on ruminating upon scenes that can afford neither variety
nor certainty to dwell twenty days in expectation of an even that may
be decided in a quarter of an hour is grievous 

if he come to paris although i should be on my tour he will very easily
find out my lodgings for i every day see some one or other of my
countrymen and divers of them have i entertained here i go frequently
to the opera and to the play and appear at court and at all public
places and on my quitting this city will leave a direction whither my
letters from england or elsewhere shall from time to time be forwarded 
were i sure that his intention is what joseph leman tells me it is i
would stay here or shorten his course to me let him be where he would 

i cannot get off my regrets on account of this dear lady for the blood of
me if the colonel and i are to meet as he has done me no injury and
loves the memory of his cousin we shall engage with the same sentiments 
as to the object of our dispute and that you know is no very common
case 

in short i am as much convinced that i have done wrong as he can be 
and regret it as much but i will not bear to be threatened by any man
in the world however conscious i may be of having deserved blame 

adieu belford be sincere with me no palliation as thou valuest

thy
lovelace 



letter lix

mr belford to robert lovelace esq 
london oct 26 


i cannot think my dear lovelace that colonel morden has either
threatened you in those gross terms mentioned by the vile joseph leman 
or intends to follow you they are the words of people of that fellow's
class and not of a gentleman not of colonel morden i am sure you'll
observe that joseph pretends not to say that he heard him speak them 

i have been very solicitous to sound the colonel for your sake and for
his own and for the sake of the injunctions of the excellent lady to me 
as well as to him on that subject he is and you will not wonder that
he should be extremely affected and owns that he has expressed himself
in terms of resentment on the occasion once he said to me that had his
beloved cousin's case been that of a common seduction her own credulity
or weakness contributing to her fall he could have forgiven you but 
in so many words he assured me that he had not taken any resolutions 
nor had he declared himself to the family in such a way as should bind
him to resent on the contrary he has owned that his cousin's
injunctions have hitherto had the force upon him which i could wish they
should have 

he went abroad in a week after you when he took his leave of me he
told me that his design was to go to florence and that he would settle
his affairs there and then return to england and here pass the
remainder of his days 

i was indeed apprehensive that if you and he were to meet something
unhappy might fall out and as i knew that you proposed to take italy 
and very likely florence in your return to france i was very solicitous
to prevail upon you to take the court of spain into your plan i am
still so and if you are not to be prevailed upon to do that let me
entreat you to avoid florence or leghorn in your return since you have
visited both heretofore at least let not the proposal of a meeting
come from you 

it would be matter of serious reflection to me if the very fellow this
joseph leman who gave you such an opportunity to turn all the artillery
of his masters against themselves and to play them upon one another to
favour your plotting purposes should be the instrument in the devil's
hand unwittingly too to avenge them all upon you for should you even
get the better of the colonel would the mischief end there it would
but add remorse to your present remorse since the interview must end in
death for he would not i am confident take his life at your hand the
harlowes would moreover prosecute you in a legal way you hate them 
and they would be gainers by his death rejoicers in your's and have you
not done mischief enough already 

let me therefore and through me all your friends have the
satisfaction to hear that you are resolved to avoid this gentleman time
will subdue all things nobody doubts your bravery nor will it be known
that your plan is changed through persuasion 

young harlowe talks of calling you to account this is a plain evidence 
that mr morden has not taken the quarrel upon himself for their family 

i am in no apprehension of any body but colonel morden i know it will
not be a mean to prevail upon you to oblige me if i say that i am well
assured that this gentleman is a skillful swordsman and that he is as
cool and sedate as skillful but yet i will add that if i had a value
for my life he should be the last man except yourself with whom i
would choose to have a contention 

i have as you required been very candid and sincere with you i have
not aimed at palliation if you seek not colonel morden it is my
opinion he will not seek you for he is a man of principle but if you
seek him i believe he will not shun you 

let me re-urge  it is the effect of my love for you   that you know your
own guilt in this affair and should not be again an aggressor it would
be pity that so brave a man as the colonel should drop were you and he
to meet and on the other hand it would be dreadful that you should be
sent to your account unprepared for it and pursuing a fresh violence 
moreover seest thou not in the deaths of two of thy principal agents 
the hand-writing upon the wall against thee 

my zeal on this occasion may make me guilty of repetition indeed i know
not how to quit the subject but if what i have written added to your
own remorse and consciousness cannot prevail all that i might further
urge would be ineffectual 

adieu therefore mayst thou repent of the past and may no new
violences add to thy heavy reflections and overwhelm thy future hopes 
are the wishes of

thy true friend 
john belford 



letter lx 

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
munich nov 11 22 


i received your's this moment just as i was setting out for vienna 

as to going to madrid or one single step out of the way to avoid colonel
morden let me perish if i do you cannot think me so mean a wretch 

and so you own that he has threatened me but not in gross and
ungentlemanly terms you say if he has threatened me like a gentleman 
i will resent his threats like a gentleman but he has not done as a man
of honour if he has threatened at all behind my back i would scorn to
threaten any man to whom i knew how to address myself either personally
or by pen and ink 

as to what you mention of my guilt of the hand-writing on the wall of a
legal prosecution if he meet his fate from my hand of his skill 
coolness courage and such-like poltroon stuff what can you mean by it 
surely you cannot believe that such insinuations as those will weaken
either my hands or my heart no more of this sort of nonsense i beseech
you in any of your future letters 

he had not taken any resolutions you say when you saw him he must and
will take resolutions one way or other very quickly for i wrote to him
yesterday without waiting for this or your answer to my last i could
not avoid it i could not as i told you in that live in suspense i
have directed my letter to florence nor could i suffer my friends to
live in suspense as to my safety but i have couched it in such moderate
terms that he has fairly his option he will be the challenger if he
take it in the sense in which he may so handsomely avoid taking it and
if he does it will demonstrate that malice and revenge were the
predominant passions with him and that he was determined but to settle
his affairs and then take his resolutions as you phrase it yet if we
are to meet  for i know what my option would be in his case on such a
letter complaisant as it is  i wish he had a worse i a better cause 
it would be a sweet revenge to him were i to fall by his hand but what
should i be the better for killing him 

i will enclose a copy of the letter i sent him 


 


on re-perusing your's in a cooler moment i cannot but thank you for your
friendly love and good intentions my value for you from the first
hour of our acquaintance till now i have never found misplaced 
regarding at least your intention thou must however own a good deal of
blunder of the over-do and under-do kind with respect to the part thou
actest between me and the beloved of my heart but thou art really an
honest fellow and a sincere and warm friend i could almost wish i had
not written to florence till i had received thy letter now before me 
but it is gone let it go if he wish peace and to avoid violence he
will have a fair opportunity to embrace the one and shun the other if
not he must take his fate 

but be this as it may you may contrive to let young harlowe know  he is
a menacer too   that i shall be in england in march next at farthest 

this of bavaria is a gallant and polite court nevertheless being
uncertain whether my letter may meet with the colonel at florence i
shall quit it and set out as i intended for vienna taking care to
have any letter or message from him conveyed to me there which will soon
bring me back hither or to any other place to which i shall be invited 

as i write to charlotte i have nothing more to add after compliments to
all friends than that i am

wholly your's 
lovelace 


 


mr lovelace to william morden esq 
 enclosed in the above  
munich nov 10 21 


sir 

i have heard with a great deal of surprise that you have thought fit to
throw out some menacing expressions against me 

i should have been very glad that you had thought i had punishment enough
in my own mind for the wrongs i have done to the most excellent of women 
and that it had been possible for two persons so ardently joining in one
love especially as i was desirous to the utmost of my power to repair
those wrongs to have lived if not on amicable terms in such a way as
not to put either to the pain of hearing of threatenings thrown out in
absence which either ought to be despised for if he had not spirit to
take notice of them 

now sir if what i have heard be owing only to warmth of temper or to
sudden passion while the loss of all other losses the most deplorable to
me was recent i not only excuse but commend you for it but if you are
really determined to meet me on any other account  which i own to you 
is not however what i wish   it would be very blamable and very unworthy
of the character i desire to maintain as well with you as with every
other gentleman to give you a difficulty in doing it 

being uncertain when this letter may meet you i shall set out to-morrow
for vienna where any letter directed to the post-house in the city or
to baron windisgrat's at the favorita to whom i have commendations 
will come to hand 

mean time believing you to be a man too generous to make a wrong
construction of what i am going to declare and knowing the value which
the dearest of all creatures had for you and your relation to her i
will not scruple to assure you that the most acceptable return will be 
that colonel morden chooses to be upon an amicable rather than upon any
other footing with

his sincere admirer and humble servant 
r lovelace 



letter lxi

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
lintz nov 28 
 dec 9 


i am now on my way to trent in order to meet colonel morden in
pursuance of his answer to my letter enclosed in my last i had been
at presburgh and had intended to visit some other cities of hungary 
but having obliged myself to return first to vienna i there met with
his letter which follows 


munich nov 21 
 dec 2 


sir 

your letter was at florence four days before i arrived there 

that i might not appear unworthy of your favour i set out for this city
the very next morning i knew not but that the politeness of this court
might have engaged beyond his intention a gentleman who has only his
pleasure to pursue 

but being disappointed in my hope of finding you here it becomes me to
acquaint you that i have such a desire to stand well in the opinion of a
man of your spirit that i cannot hesitate a moment upon the option 
which i am sure mr lovelace in my situation thus called upon would
make 

i own sir that i have on all occasions spoken of your treatment of my
ever-dear cousin as it deserved it would have been very surprising if i
had not and it behoves me now you have given me so noble an opportunity
of explaining myself to convince you that no words fell from my lips 
of you merely because you were absent i acquaint you therefore that
i will attend your appointment and would were it to the farthest part
of the globe 

i shall stay some days at this court and if you please to direct for me
at m klienfurt's in this city whether i remain here or not your
commands will come safely and speedily to the hands of sir 

your most humble servant 
wm morden 


 


so you see belford that the colonel by his ready his even
eagerly-expressed acceptance of the offered interview was determined 
and is it not much better to bring such a point as this to an issue 
than to give pain to friends for my safety or continue in suspense
myself as i must do if i imagined that another had aught against me 

this was my reply 


vienna nov 25 
 dec 6 


sir 

i have this moment the favour of your's i will suspend a tour i was
going to take into hungary and instantly set out for munich and if i
can find you not there will proceed on to trent this city being on
the confines of italy will be most convenient as i presume to you in
your return to tuscany and i shall hope to meet you in it on the 3 14th
of december 

i shall bring with me only a french valet and an english footman other
particulars may be adjusted when i have the honour to see you till
when i am sir 

your most obedient servant 
r lovelace 


 


now jack i have no manner of apprehension of the event of this meeting 
and i think i must say he seeks me out not i him and so let him take
the consequence 

what is infinitely nearer to my heart is my ingratitude to the most
excellent of women my premeditated ingratitude yet all the while
enabled to distinguish and to adore her excellencies in spite of the
mean opinion of the sex which i had imbibed from early manhood 

but this lady has asserted the worthiness of her sex and most gloriously
has she exalted it with me now yet surely as i have said and written
an hundred times there cannot be such another woman 

but as my loss in her departure is the greatest of any man's and as she
was dearer to me than to any other person in the world and once she
herself wished to be so what an insolence in any man breathing to
pretend to avenge her on me happy happy thrice happy had i known how
to value as i ought to have valued the glory of such a preference 

i will not aggravate to myself this aggravation of the colonel's
pretending to call me to account for my treatment of a lady so much my
own lest in the approaching interview my heart should relent for one
so nearly related to her and who means honour and justice to her memory 
and i should thereby give him advantages which otherwise he cannot have 
for i know that i shall be inclined to trust to my skill to save a man
who was so much and so justly valued by her and shall be loath to give
way to my resentment as a threatened man and in this respect only i am
sorry for his skill and his courage lest i should be obliged in my own
defence to add a chalk to a score that is already too long 


 


indeed indeed belford i am and shall be to my latest hour the most
miserable of beings such exalted generosity why didst thou put into
my craving hands the copy of her will why sentest thou to me the
posthumous letter what thou i was earnest to see the will thou knewest
what they both were  i did not  and that it would be cruel to oblige me 

the meeting of twenty colonel mordens were there twenty to meet in turn 
would be nothing to me would not give me a moment's concern as to my
own safety but my reflections upon my vile ingratitude to so superior an
excellence will ever be my curse 

had she been a miss howe to me and treated me as if i were a hickman i
had had a call for revenge and policy when i had intended to be an
husband might have justified my attempts to humble her but a meek and
gentle temper was her's though a true heroine whenever honour or virtue
called for an exertion of spirit 

nothing but my cursed devices stood in the way of my happiness 
remembrest thou not how repeatedly from the first i poured cold water
upon her rising flame by meanly and ungratefully turning upon her the
injunctions which virgin delicacy and filial duty induced her to lay
me under before i got her into my power 


 see vol iii letter xv see also letters xvii xlv xlvi of that
volume and many other places 


did she not tell me and did i not know it if she had not told me that
she could not be guilty of affectation or tyranny to the man whom she
intended to marry i knew as she once upbraided me that from the time
i had got her from her father's house i had a plain path before me 
true did she say and i triumphed in the discovery that from that time
i held her soul in suspense an hundred times my ipecacuanha trial
alone was enough to convince an infidel that she had a mind in which love
and tenderness would have presided had i permitted the charming buds to
put forth and blow 


 see vol v letter xxxiv it may be observed further that all
clarissa's occasional lectures to miss howe on that young lady's
treatment of mr hickman prove that she was herself above affectation
and tyranny see more particularly the advice she gives to that
friend of her heart letter xxxii of vol viii o my dear  says she 
in that letter that it had been my lot as i was not permitted to live
single to have met with a man by whom i could have acted generously and
unreservedly  etc etc 
 see vol v letters xxvi and xxxiv 
 ibid letter xxxiv 
 see vol v letters ii iii 


she would have had no reserve as once she told me had i given her cause
of doubt and did she not own to thee that once she could have loved
me and could she have made me good would have made me happy o 
belford here was love a love of the noblest kind a love as she hints
in her posthumous letter that extended to the soul and which she not
only avowed in her dying hours but contrived to let me know it after
death in that letter filled with warnings and exhortations which had
for their sole end my eternal welfare 


 ibid letter xxxvi 
 see vol viii letter lxiv 
 see letter xxxvi of this volume 


the cursed women indeed endeavoured to excite my vengeance and my
pride by preaching to me of me and my pride was at times too much
excited by their vile insinuations but had it even been as they said 
well might she who had been used to be courted and admired by every
desiring eye and worshipped by every respectful heart well might such
a woman be allowed to draw back when she found herself kept in suspense 
as to the great question of all by a designing and intriguing spirit 
pretending awe and distance as reasons for reining-in a fervour which 
if real cannot be reined-in divine creature her very doubts her
reserves so justly doubting would have been my assurance and my
glory and what other trial needed her virtue what other needed a
purity so angelic blessed with such a command in her passions in the
bloom of youth had i not been a villain and a wanton a conceited a
proud fool as well as a villain 

these reflections sharpened rather than their edge by time abated 
accompany me in whatever i do and wherever i go and mingle with all
my diversions and amusements and yet i go into gay and splendid
company i have made new acquaintance in the different courts i have
visited i am both esteemed and sought after by persons of rank and
merit i visit the colleges the churches the palaces i frequent
the theatre am present at every public exhibition and see all that is
worth seeing that i had not see before in the cabinets of the curious 
am sometimes admitted to the toilette of an eminent toast and make one
with distinction at the assemblies of others yet can think of nothing 
nor of any body with delight but of my clarissa nor have i seen one
woman with advantage to herself but as she resembles in stature air 
complexion voice or in some feature that charmer that only charmer
of my soul 

what greater punishment than to have these astonishing perfections 
which she was mistress of strike my remembrance with such force when i
have nothing left me but the remorse of having deprived myself and the
world of such a blessing now and then indeed am i capable of a gleam
of comfort arising not ungenerously from the moral certainty which i
have of her everlasting happiness in spite of all the machinations and
devices which i set on foot to ensnare her virtue and to bring down so
pure a mind to my own level 

 for can i be at worst  avert that worst 
 o thou supreme who only canst avert it  
 so much a wretch so very far abandon'd 
 but that i must even in the horrid's gloom 
 reap intervenient joy at least some respite 
 from pain and anguish in her bliss 


 


if i find myself thus miserable abroad i will soon return to england 
and follow your example i think turn hermit or some plaguy thing or
other and see what a constant course of penitence and mortification will
do for me there is no living at this rate d n me if there be 

if any mishap should befal me you'll have the particulars of it from de
la tour he indeed knows but little english but every modern tongue is
your's he is a trusty and ingenious fellow and if any thing happen 
will have some other papers which i have already sealed up for you to
transmit to lord m and since thou art so expert and so ready at
executorships pr'ythee belford accept of the office for me as well as
for my clarissa clarissa lovelace let me call her 

by all that's good i am bewitched to her memory her very name with
mine joined to it ravishes my soul and is more delightful to me than
the sweetest music 

had i carried her  i must still recriminate  to any other place than that
accursed woman's for the potion was her invention and mixture and all
the persisted-in violence was at her instigation and at that of her
wretched daughters who have now amply revenged upon me their own ruin 
which they lay at my door 

but this looks so like the confession of a thief at the gallows that
possibly thou wilt be apt to think i am intimidated in prospect of the
approaching interview but far otherwise on the contrary most
cheerfully do i go to meet the colonel and i would tear my heart out
of my breast with my own hands were it capable of fear or concern on
that account 

thus much only i know that if i should kill him  which i will not do 
if i can help it   i shall be far from being easy in my mind that shall
i never more be but as the meeting is evidently of his own seeking 
against an option fairly given to the contrary and i cannot avoid it 
i'll think of that hereafter it is but repenting and mortifying for all
at once for i am sure of victory as i am that i now live let him be
ever so skillful a swordsman since besides that i am no unfleshed
novice this is a sport that when provoked to it i love as well as my
food and moreover i shall be as calm and undisturbed as the bishop at
his prayers while he as is evident by his letter must be actuated by
revenge and passion 

doubt not therefore jack that i shall give a good account of this
affair mean time i remain 

your's most affectionately etc 
lovelace 



letter lxii

mr lovelace to john belford esq 
trent dec 3 14 


to-morrow is to be the day that will in all probability send either
one or two ghosts to attend the manes of my clarissa 

i arrived here yesterday and inquiring for an english gentleman of the
name of morden soon found out the colonel's lodgings he had been in
town two days and left his name at every probable place 

he was gone to ride out and i left my name and where to be found and
in the evening he made me a visit 

he was plaguy gloomy that was not i but yet he told me that i had
acted like a man of true spirit in my first letter and with honour in
giving him so readily this meeting he wished i had in other respects 
and then we might have seen each other upon better terms than now we did 

i said there was no recalling what was passed and that i wished some
things had not been done as well as he 

to recriminate now he said would be as exasperating as unavailable 
and as i had so cheerfully given him this opportunity words should give
place to business your choice mr lovelace of time of place of
weapon shall be my choice 

the two latter be your's mr morden the time to-morrow or next day 
as you please 

next day then mr lovelace and we'll ride out to-morrow to fix the
place 

agreed sir 

well now mr lovelace do you choose the weapon 

i said i believed we might be upon an equal footing with the single
rapier but if he thought otherwise i had no objection to a pistol 

i will only say replied he that the chances may be more equal by the
sword because we can neither of us be to seek in that and you would
stand says he a worse chance as i apprehend with a pistol and yet
i have brought two that you may take your choice of either for added
he i have never missed a mark at pistol-distance since i knew how to
hold a pistol 

i told him that he spoke like himself that i was expert enough that
way to embrace it if he chose it though not so sure of my mark as
he pretended to be yet the devil's in it colonel if i who have slit
a bullet in two upon a knife's edge hit not my man so i have no
objection to a pistol if it be your choice no man i'll venture to
say has a steadier hand or eye than i have 

they may both be of use to you sir at the sword as well as at the
pistol the sword therefore be the thing if you please 

with all my heart 

we parted with a solemn sort of ceremonious civility and this day i
called upon him and we rode out together to fix upon the place and
both being of one mind and hating to put off for the morrow what could
be done to-day would have decided it then but de la tour and the
colonel's valet who attended us being unavoidably let into the secret 
joined to beg we would have with us a surgeon from brixen whom la tour
had fallen in with there and who had told him he was to ride next
morning to bleed a person in a fever at a lone cottage which by the
surgeon's description was not far from the place where we then were if
it were not that very cottage within sight of us 

they overtook so to manage it that the surgeon should know nothing of
the matter till his assistance was called in and la tour being as i
assured the colonel a ready contriving fellow  whom i ordered to obey
him as myself were the chance to be in his favour   we both agreed to
defer the decision till to-morrow and to leave the whole about the
surgeon to the management of our two valets enjoining them absolute
secrecy and so rode back again by different ways 

we fixed upon a little lone valley for the spot ten to-morrow morning
the time and single rapier the word yet i repeatedly told him that i
valued myself so much upon my skill in that weapon that i would wish him
to choose any other 

he said it was a gentleman's weapon and he who understood it not wanted
a qualification that he ought to suffer for not having but that as to
him one weapon was as good as another throughout all the instruments of
offence 

so jack you see i take no advantage of him but my devil must deceive
me if he take not his life or his death at my hands before eleven
to-morrow morning 

his valet and mine are to be present but both strictly enjoined to be
impartial and inactive and in return for my civility of the like
nature he commanded his to be assisting me if he fell 

we are to ride thither and to dismount when at the place and his
footman and mine are to wait at an appointed distance with a chaise to
carry off to the borders of the venetian territories the survivor if one
drop or to assist either or both as occasion may demand 

and thus belford is the matter settled 

a shower of rain has left me nothing else to do and therefore i write
this letter though i might as well have deferred it till to-morrow
twelve o'clock when i doubt not to be able to write again to assure you
much i am

yours etc 
lovelace 



letter lxiv

translation of a letter from f j de la tour 

to john belford esq 
near soho-square london 
trent dec 18 n s 


sir 

i have melancholy news to inform you of by order of the chevalier
lovelace he showed me his letter to you before he sealed it 
signifying that he was to meet the chevalier morden on the 15th 
wherefore as the occasion of the meeting is so well known to you i
shall say nothing of it here 

i had taken care to have ready within a little distance a surgeon and
his assistant to whom under an oath of secrecy i had revealed the
matter though i did not own it to the two gentlemen so that they were
prepared with bandages and all things proper for well was i acquainted
with the bravery and skill of my chevalier and had heard the character
of the other and knew the animosity of both a post-chaise was ready 
with each of their footmen at a little distance 

the two chevaliers came exactly at their time they were attended by
monsieur margate the colonel's gentleman and myself they had given
orders over night and now repeated them in each other's presence that
we should observe a strict impartiality between them and that if one
fell each of us should look upon himself as to any needful help or
retreat as the servant of the survivor and take his commands
accordingly 

after a few compliments both the gentlemen with the greatest presence
of mind that i ever beheld in men stript to their shirts and drew 

they parried with equal judgment several passes my chevalier drew the
first blood making a desperate push which by a sudden turn of his
antagonist missed going clear through him and wounded him on the fleshy
part of the ribs of his right side which part the sword tore out being
on the extremity of the body but before my chevalier could recover
himself the colonel in return pushed him into the inside of the left
arm near the shoulder and the sword raking his breast as it passed 
being followed by a great effusion of blood the colonel said sir i
believe you have enough 

my chevalier swore by g d he was not hurt twas a pin's point and so
made another pass at his antagonist which he with a surprising
dexterity received under his arm and run my dear chevalier into the
body who immediately fell saying the luck is your's sir o my beloved
clarissa now art thou inwardly he spoke three or four words more his
sword dropt from his hand mr morden threw his down and ran to him 
saying in french ah monsieur you are a dead man call to god for
mercy 

we gave the signal agreed upon to the footmen and they to the surgeons 
who instantly came up 

colonel morden i found was too well used to the bloody work for he was
as cool as if nothing extraordinary had happened assisting the surgeons 
though his own wound bled much but my dear chevalier fainted away two
or three times running and vomited blood besides 

however they stopped the bleeding for the present and we helped him
into the voiture and then the colonel suffered his own wound to be
dressed and appeared concerned that my chevalier was between whiles
 when he could speak and struggle extremely outrageous poor
gentleman he had made quite sure of victory 

the colonel against the surgeons' advice would mount on horseback to
pass into the venetian territories and generously gave me a purse of
gold to pay the surgeons desiring me to make a present to the footman 
and to accept of the remainder as a mark of his satisfaction in my
conduct and in my care and tenderness of my master 

the surgeons told him that my chevalier could not live over the day 

when the colonel took leave of him mr lovelace said you have well
revenged the dear creature 

i have sir said mr morden and perhaps shall be sorry that you called
upon me to this work while i was balancing whether to obey or disobey 
the dear angel 

there is a fate in it replied my chevalier a cursed fate or this
could not have been but be ye all witnesses that i have provoked my
destiny and acknowledge that i fall by a man of honour 

sir said the colonel with the piety of a confessor wringing mr 
lovelace's hand snatch these few fleeting moments and commend yourself
to god 

and so he rode off 

the voiture proceeded slowly with my chevalier yet the motion set both
his wounds bleeding afresh and it was with difficulty they again stopped
the blood 

we brought him alive to the nearest cottage and he gave orders to me to
dispatch to you the packet i herewith send sealed up and bid me write to
you the particulars of this most unhappy affair and give you thanks in
his name for all your favours and friendship to him 

contrary to all expectation he lived over the night but suffered much 
as well from his impatience and disappointment as from his wounds for
he seemed very unwilling to die 

he was delirious at times in the two last hours and then several times
cried out as if he had seen some frightful spectre take her away take
her away but named nobody and sometimes praised some lady that
clarissa i suppose whom he had invoked when he received his death's
wound calling her sweet excellence divine creature fair sufferer 
and once he said look down blessed spirit look down and there stopt 
 his lips however moving 

at nine in the morning he was seized with convulsions and fainted away 
and it was a quarter of an hour before he came out of them 

his few last words i must not omit as they show an ultimate composure 
which may administer some consolation to his honourable friends 

blessed said he addressing himself no doubt to heaven for his dying
eyes were lifted up a strong convulsion prevented him for a few moments
saying more but recovering he again with great fervour lifting up
his eyes and his spread hands pronounced the word blessed then in a
seeming ejaculation he spoke inwardly so as not to be understood at
last he distinctly pronounced these three words 

 let this expiate 

and then his head sinking on his pillow he expired at about half an
hour after ten 

he little thought poor gentleman his end so near so had given no
direction about his body i have caused it to be embowelled and
deposited in a vault till i have orders from england 

this is a favour that was procured with difficulty and would have been
refused had he not been an englishman of rank a nation with reason
respected in every austrian government for he had refused ghostly
attendance and the sacraments in the catholic way may his soul be
happy i pray god 

i have had some trouble also on account of the manner of his death from
the magistracy here who have taken the requisite informations in the
affair and it has cost some money of which and of the dear
chevalier's effects i will give you a faithful account in my next and
so waiting at this place your commands i am sir 

your most faithful and obedient servant 
f j de la tour 



conclusion

supposed to be written by mr belford


what remains to be mentioned for the satisfaction of such of the readers
as may be presumed to have interested themselves in the fortunes of those
other principals in the story who survived mr lovelace will be found
summarily related as follows 

the news of mr lovelace's unhappy end was received with as much grief by
his own relations as it was with exultation by the harlowe family and
by miss howe his own family were most to be pitied because being
sincere admirers of the inimitable lady they were greatly grieved for
the injustice done her and now had the additional mortification of
losing the only male of it by a violent death 

that his fate was deserved was still a heightening of their calamity as
they had for that very reason and his unpreparedness for it but too
much ground for apprehension with regard to his future happiness while
the other family from their unforgiving spirit and even the noble young
lady above mentioned from her lively resentments found his death some
little some temporary alleviation of the heavy loss they had sustained 
principally through his means 

temporary alleviation we repeat as to the harlowe family for they were
far from being happy or easy in their reflections upon their own conduct 
 and still the less as the inconsolable mother rested not till she had
procured by means of colonel morden large extracts from some of the
letters that compose this history which convinced them all that the very
correspondence which clarissa while with them renewed with mr 
lovelace was renewed for their sakes more than for her own that she
had given him no encouragement contrary to her duty and to that prudence
for which she was so early noted that had they trusted to a discretion
which they owned she had never brought into question she would have
extricated them and herself as she once proposed to her mother from
all difficulties as to lovelace that she if any woman ever could would
have given a glorious instance of a passion conquered or at least kept
under by reason and by piety the man being too immoral to be implicitly
beloved 


 see vol i letter xvii 


the unhappy parents and uncles from the perusal of these extracts too
evidently for their peace saw that it was entirely owing to the avarice 
the ambition the envy of her implacable brother and sister and to the
senseless confederacy entered into by the whole family to compel her to
give her hand to a man she must despise or she had not been a clarissa 
and to their consequent persecution of her that she ever thought of
quitting her father's house and that even when she first entertained
such a thought it was with intent if possible to procure for herself a
private asylum with mrs howe or at some other place of safety but not
with mr lovelace nor with any of the ladies of his family though
invited by the latter from whence she might propose terms which ought
to have been complied with and which were entirely consistent with her
duty that though she found herself disappointed of the hoped-for refuge
and protection she intended not by meeting mr lovelace to put herself
into his power all that she aimed at by taking that step being to
endeavour to pacify so fierce a spirit lest he should as he indeed was
determined to do pay a visit to her friends which might have been
attended with fatal consequences but was spirited away by him in such a
manner as made her an object of pity rather than of blame 

these extracts further convinced them all that it was to her unaffected
regret that she found that marriage was not in her power afterwards for a
long time and at last but on one occasion when their unnatural cruelty
to her on a new application she had made to her aunt hervey to procure
mercy and pardon rendered her incapable of receiving his proffered hand 
and so obliged her to suspend the day intending only to suspend it till
recovered 

they saw with equal abhorrence of lovelace and of their own cruelty and
with the highest admiration of her that the majesty of her virtue had
awed the most daring spirit in the world so that he durst not attempt to
carry his base designs into execution till by wicked potions he had
made her senses the previous sacrifice 

but how did they in a manner adore her memory how did they recriminate
upon each other when they found that she had not only preserved herself
from repeated outrage by the most glorious and intrepid behaviour in
defiance and to the utter confusion of all his libertine notions but
had the fortitude constantly and with a noble disdain to reject him 
whom why the man she once could have loved kneeling for pardon and
begging to be permitted to make her the best reparation then in his power
to make her that is to say by marriage his fortunes high and
unbroken she his prisoner at the time in a vile house rejected by all
her friends upon repeated application to them for mercy and
forgiveness rejected mercy and forgiveness and a last blessing 
afterwards imploring and that as much to lighten their future remorses 
as for the comfort of her own pious heart yet though savagely refused 
on a supposition that she was not so near her end as she was represented
departed forgiving and blessing them all 

then they recollected that her posthumous letters instead of reproaches 
were filled with comfortings that she had in her last will in their own
way laid obligations upon them all obligations which they neither
deserved nor expected as if she thought to repair the injustice which
self-partiality made some of them conclude done to them by her
grandfather in his will 

these intelligences and recollections were perpetual subjects of
recrimination to them heightened their anguish for the loss of a child
who was the glory of their family and not seldom made them shun each
other at the times they were accustomed to meet together that they
might avoid the mutual reproaches of eyes that spoke when tongues were
silent their stings also sharpened by time what an unhappy family was
this well might colonel morden in the words of juvenal challenge all
other miserable families to produce such a growing distress as that of
the harlowes a few months before so happy was able to produce 

 humani generis mores tibi nosse volenti
 sufficit una domus paucos consume dies and
 dicere te miserum postquam illinc veneris aude 

mrs harlowe lived about two years and an half after the lamented death
of her clarissa 

mr harlowe had the additional affliction to survive his lady about half
a year her death by new pointing his former anguish and remorse 
hastening his own 

both in their last hours however comforted themselves that they
should be restored to their blessed daughter as they always from the
time they were acquainted with the above particulars of her story and
with her happy exit called her 

they both lived however to see their son james and their daughter
arabella married but not to take joy in either of their nuptials 

mr james harlowe married a woman of family an orphan and is obliged 
at a very great expense to support his claim to estates which were his
principal inducement to make his addresses to her but which to this
day he has not recovered nor is likely to recover having powerful
adversaries to contend with and a title to assert which admits of
litigation and he not blessed with so much patience as is necessary to
persons embarrassed in law 

what is further observable with regard to him is that the match was
entirely of his own head against the advice of his father mother and
uncles who warned him of marrying in this lady a law-suit for life his
ungenerous behaviour to his wife for what she cannot help and for what
is as much her misfortune as his has occasioned such estrangements
between them she being a woman of spirit as were the law-suits
determined even more favourably than probably they will be must make
him unhappy to the end of his life he attributes all his misfortunes 
when he opens himself to the few friends he has to his vile and cruel
treatment of his angelic sister he confesses these misfortunes to be
just without having temper to acquiesce in the acknowledged justice 
one month in every year he puts on mourning and that month commences
with him on the 7th of september during which he shuts himself up from
all company finally he is looked upon and often calls himself 

 the most miserable of beings 

arabella's fortune became a temptation to a man of quality to make his
addresses to her his title an inducement with her to approve of him 
brothers and sisters when they are not friends are generally the
sharpest enemies to each other he thought too much was done for in the
settlements she thought not enough and for some years past they have
so heartily hated each other that if either know a joy it is in being
told of some new misfortune or displeasure that happens to the other 
indeed before they came to an open rupture they were continually
loading each other by way of exonerating themselves to the additional
disquiet of the whole family with the principal guilt of their
implacable behaviour and sordid cruelty to their admirable sister may
the reports that are spread of this lady's farther unhappiness from her
lord's free life a fault she justly thought so odious in mr lovelace
 though that would not have been an insuperable objection with her to his
addresses and of his public slights and contempt of her and even
sometimes of his personal abuses which are said to be owing to her
impatient spirit and violent passions be utterly groundless for what
a heart must that be which would wish she might be as great a torment
to herself as she had aimed to be to her sister especially as she
regrets to this hour and declares that she shall to the last of her
life her cruel treatment of that sister and as well as her brother is
but too ready to attribute to that her own unhappiness 

mr antony and mr john harlowe are still at the writing of this 
living but often declare that with their beloved niece they lost all
the joy of their lives and lament without reserve in all companies 
the unnatural part they were induced to take against her 

mr solmes is also still living if a man of his cast may be said to
live for his general behaviour and sordid manners are such as justify
the aversion the excellent lady had to him he has moreover found his
addresses rejected by several women of far inferior fortunes great as
his own are to those of the lady to whom he was encouraged to aspire 

mr mowbray and mr tourville having lost the man in whose conversation
they so much delighted shocked and awakened by the several unhappy
catastrophes before their eyes and having always rather ductile and
dictating hearts took their friend belford's advice converted the
remainder of their fortunes into annuities for life and retired the one
into yorkshire the other into nottinghamshire of which counties they
are natives their friend belford managing their concerns for them and
corresponding with them and having more and more hopes every time he
sees them which is once or twice a year when they come to town that
they will become more and more worthy of their names and families 

as those sisters in iniquity sally martin and polly horton had
abilities and education superior to what creatures of their cast
generally can boast of and as their histories are no where given in the
preceding papers in which they are frequently mentioned it cannot fail
of gratifying the reader's curiosity as well as answering the good ends
designed by the publication of this work to give a brief account of
their parentage and manner of training-up preparative to the vile
courses they fell into and of what became of them after the dreadful
exit of the infamous sinclair 

sally martin was the daughter of a substantial mercer at the court-end
of the town to whom her mother a grocer's daughter in the city brought
a handsome fortune and both having a gay turn and being fond of the
fashions which it was their business to promote and which the wives and
daughters of the uppermost tradesmen especially in that quarter of the
town generally affect to follow it was no wonder that they brought up
their daughter accordingly nor that she who was a very sprightly and
ready-witted girl and reckoned very pretty and very genteel should
every year improve upon such examples 

she early found herself mistress of herself all she did was right all
she said was admired early very early did she dismiss blushes from
her cheek she could not blush because she could not doubt and
silence whatever was the subject was as much a stranger to her as
diffidence 

she never was left out of any party of pleasure after she had passed her
ninth year and in honour of her prattling vein was considered as a
principal person in the frequent treats and entertainments which her
parents fond of luxurious living gave with a view to increase their
acquaintance for the sake of their business not duly reflecting that
the part they suffered her to take in what made for their interest would
probably be a mean to quicken their appetites and ruin the morals of
their daughter for whose sake as an only child they were solicitous to
obtain wealth 

the child so much a woman what must the woman be 

at fifteen or sixteen she affected both in dress and manners to ape
such of the quality as were most apish the richest silks in her
father's shop were not too rich for her at all public diversions she
was the leader instead of the led of all her female kindred and
acquaintances though they were a third older than herself she would
bustle herself into a place and make room for her more bashful
companions through the frowns of the first possessors at a crowded
theatre leaving every one near her amazed at her self-consequence 
wondering she had no servant to keep place for her whisperingly
inquiring who she was and then sitting down admiring her fortitude 

she officiously made herself of consequence to the most noted players 
who as one of their patronesses applied to her for her interest on
their benefit-nights she knew the christian as well as sur name of
every pretty fellow who frequented public places and affected to speak
of them by the former 

those who had not obeyed the call her eyes always made upon all of them
for notice at her entrance or before she took her seat were spoken of
with haughtiness as jacks or toms wile her favourites with an
affectedly-endearing familiarity and a prettiness of accent were
jackeys and tommys and if they stood very high in her graces dear
devils and agreeable toads 

she sat in judgment and an inexorable judge she was upon the actions
and conduct of every man and woman of quality and fashion as they became
the subjects of conversation she was deeply learned in the scandalous
chronicle she made every character every praise and every censure 
serve to exalt herself she should scorn to do so or so or that was
ever her way and just what she did or liked to do and judging herself
by the vileness of the most vile of her sex she wiped her mouth and sat
down satisfied with her own virtue 

she had her chair to attend her wherever she went and found people among
her betters as her pride stooped to call some of the most insignificant
people in the world to encourage her visits 

she was practised in all the arts of the card-table a true spartan girl 
and had even courage occasionally to wrangle off a detection late
hours turning night into day and day into night were the almost
unavoidable consequences of her frequent play her parents pleased
themselves that their sally had a charming constitution and as long as
she suffered not in her health they were regardless of her morals 

the needle she hated and made the constant subjects of her ridicule the
fine works that used to employ and keep out of idleness luxury and
extravagance and at home were they to have been of no other service 
the women of the last age when there were no vauxhalls ranelaghs 
marybones and such-like places of diversion to dress out for and gad
after 

and as to family-management her parents had not required any knowledge
of that sort from her and she considered it as a qualification only
necessary for hirelings and the low-born and as utterly unworthy of the
attention of a modern fine lady 

although her father had great business yet living in so high and
expensive a way he pretended not to give her a fortune answerable to it 
neither he nor his wife having set out with any notion of frugality could
think of retrenching nor did their daughter desire that they should
retrench they thought glare or ostentation reputable they called it
living genteely and as they lifted their heads above their neighbours 
they supposed their credit concerned to go forward rather than backward
in outward appearances they flattered themselves and they flattered
their girl and she was entirely of their opinion that she had charms
and wit enough to attract some man of rank of fortune at least and yet
this daughter of a mercer-father and grocer-mother could not bear the
thoughts of a creeping cit encouraging herself with the few instances
 comcommon ones of girls much inferior to herself in station talents 
education and even fortune who had succeeded as she doubted not to
succeed handsome settlements and a chariot that tempting gewgaw to
the vanity of the middling class of females were the least that she
proposed to herself but all this while neither her parents nor herself
considered that she had appetites indulged to struggle with and a turn
of education given her as well as a warm constitution unguarded by
sound principles and unbenefitted by example which made her much better
qualified for a mistress than a wife 

her twentieth year to her own equal wonder and regret passed over her
head and she had not one offer that her pride would permit her to accept
of a girl from fifteen to eighteen her beauty then beginning to
blossom will as a new thing attract the eyes of men but if she make
her face cheap at public places she will find that new faces will draw
more attention than fine faces constantly seen policy therefore if
nothing else were considered would induce a young beauty if she could
tame her vanity just to show herself and to be talked of and then
withdrawing as if from discretion and discreet it will be to do so 
expect to be sought after rather than to be thought to seek for only
reviving now-and-then the memory of herself at the public places in
turn if she find herself likely to be forgotten and then she will be
new again but this observation ought young ladies always to have in
their heads that they can hardly ever expect to gratify their vanity 
and at the same time gain the admiration of men worthy of making partners
for life they may in short have many admirers at public places but
not one lover 

sally martin knew nothing of this doctrine her beauty was in its bloom 
and yet she found herself neglected sally martin the mercer's
daughter she never fails being here  was the answer and the
accompanying observation made to every questioner who is that lady 

at last her destiny approached it was at a masquerade that she first
saw the gay the handsome lovelace who was just returned from his
travels she was immediately struck with his figure and with the
brilliant things that she heard fall from his lips as he happened to sit
near her he who was not then looking out for a wife was taken with
sally's smartness and with an air that at the same time showed her to be
equally genteel and self-significant and signs of approbation mutually
passing he found no difficulty in acquainting himself where to visit her
next day and yet it was some mortification to a person of her
self-consequence and gay appearance to submit to be known by so fine a
young gentleman as no more than a mercer's daughter so natural is it
for a girl brought up as sally was to be occasionally ashamed of those
whose folly had set her above herself 

but whatever it might be to sally it was no disappointment to mr 
lovelace to find his mistress of no higher degree because he hoped to
reduce her soon to the lowest condition that an unhappy woman can fall
into 

but when miss martin had informed herself that her lover was the nephew
and presumptive heir of lord m she thought him the very man for whom she
had been so long and so impatiently looking out and for whom it was
worth her while to spread her toils and here it may not be amiss to
observe that it is very probable that mr lovelace had sally martin in
his thoughts and perhaps two or three more whose hopes of marriage from
him had led them to their ruin when he drew the following whimsical
picture in a letter to his friend belford not inserted in the preceding
collection 

methinks  says he i see a young couple in courtship having each a
design upon the other the girl plays off she is very happy as she is 
she cannot be happier she will not change her single state the man i
will suppose is one who does not confess that he desires not that she
should she holds ready a net under her apron he another under his coat 
each intending to throw it over the other's neck she over his when her
pride is gratified and she thinks she can be sure of him he over her's 
when the watched-for yielding moment has carried consent too far and
suppose he happens to be the more dexterous of the two and whips his net
over her before she can cast her's over him how i would fain know can
she cast her's over him how i would fain know can she be justly
entitled to cry out upon cruelty barbarity deception sacrifices and
all the rest of the exclamatory nonsense with which the pretty fools in
such a case are wont to din the ears of their conquerors is it not
just thinkest thou when she makes her appeal to gods and men that both
gods and men should laugh at her and hitting her in the teeth with her
own felonious intentions bid her sit down patiently under her deserved
disappointment 

in short sally's parents as well as herself encouraged mr lovelace's
visits they thought they might trust to a discretion in he which she
herself was too wise to doubt pride they knew she had and that in
these cases is often called discretion lord help the sex says
lovelace if they had not pride nor did they suspect danger from that
specious air of sincerity and gentleness of manners which he could
assume or lay aside whenever he pleased 

the second masquerade which was no more than their third meeting abroad 
completed her ruin from so practised though so young a deceiver and
that before she well knew she was in danger for having prevailed on her
to go off with him about twelve o'clock to his aunt forbes's a lady of
honour and fortune to whom he had given reason to expect her future
niece  the only hint of marriage he ever gave her   he carried her off
to the house of the wicked woman who bears the name of sinclair in these
papers and there by promises which she understood in the favourable
sense for where a woman loves she seldom doubts enough for her safety 
obtained an easy conquest over a virtue that was little more than
nominal 

he found it not difficult to induce her to proceed in the guilty
commerce till the effects of it became to apparent to be hid her
parents then in the first fury of their disappointment and vexation for
being deprived of all hopes of such a son-in-law turned her out of
doors 

her disgrace thus published she became hardened and protected by her
seducer whose favourite mistress she then was she was so incensed
against her parents for an indignity so little suiting with her pride 
and the head they had always given her that she refused to return to
them when repenting of their passionate treatment of her they would
have been reconciled to her and becoming the favourite daughter of her
mother sinclair at the persuasions of that abandoned woman she practised
to bring on an abortion which she effected though she was so far gone
that it had like to have cost her her life 

thus unchastity her first crime murder her next her conscience became
seared and young as she was and fond of her deceiver soon grew
indelicate enough having so thorough-paced a school-mistress to do all
she could to promote the pleasures of the man who had ruined her 
scrupling not with a spirit truly diabolical to endeavour to draw in
others to follow her example and it is hardly to be believed what
mischiefs of this sort she was the means of effecting woman confiding in
and daring woman and she a creature of specious appearance and great
art 

a still viler wickedness if possible remains to be said of sally
martin 

her father dying her mother in hopes to reclaim her as she called it 
proposed her to quit the house of the infamous sinclair and to retire
with her into the country where her disgrace and her then wicked way of
life would not be known and there so to live as to save appearances 
the only virtue she had ever taught her besides that of endeavouring
rather to delude than be deluded 

to this sally consented but with no other intention as she often owned 
 and gloried in it than to cheat her mother of the greatest part of her
substance in revenge for consenting to her being turned out of doors
long before and by way of reprisal for having persuaded her father as
she would have it to cut her off in his last will from any share in
his fortune 

this unnatural wickedness in half a year's time she brought about and
then the serpent retired to her obscene den with her spoils laughing at
what she had done even after it had broken her mother's heart as it did
in a few months' time a severe but just punishment for the unprincipled
education she had given her 

it ought to be added that this was an iniquity of which neither mr 
lovelace nor any of his friends could bear to hear her boast and
always checked her for it whenever she did condemning it with one voice 
and it is certain that this and other instances of her complicated
wickedness turned early lovelace's heart against her and had she not
been subservient to him in his other pursuits he would not have endured
her for speaking of her he would say let not any one reproach us 
jack there is no wickedness like the wickedness of a woman 


 eccles xxv 19 


a bad education was the preparative it must be confessed and for this
sally martin had reason to thank her parents as they had reason to thank
themselves for what followed but had she not met with a lovelace she
had avoided a sinclair and might have gone on at the common rate of
wives so educated and been the mother of children turned out to take
their chance in the world as she was so many lumps of soft wax fit to
take any impression that the first accidents gave them neither happy 
nor making happy every thing but useful and well off if not extremely
miserable 

polly horton was the daughter of a gentlewoman well descended whose
husband a man of family and of honour was a captain in the guards 

he died when polly was about nine years of age leaving her to the care
of her mother a lively young lady of about twenty-six with a genteel
provision for both 

her mother was extremely fond of her polly but had it not in herself to
manifest the true the genuine fondness of a parent by a strict and
guarded education dressing out and visiting and being visited by the
gay of her own sex and casting her eye abroad as one very ready to try
her fortune again in the married state 

this induced those airs and a love to those diversions which make a
young widow of so lively a turn the unfittest tutoress in the world 
even to her own daughter 

mrs horton herself having had an early turn to music and that sort of
reading which is but an earlier debauchery for young minds preparative
to the grosser at riper years to wit romances and novels songs and
plays and those without distinction moral or immoral she indulged her
daughter in the same taste and at those hours when they could not take
part in the more active and lively amusements and kill-times as some
call them used to employ miss to read to her happy enough in her own
imagination that while she was diverting her own ears and sometimes as
the piece was corrupting her own heart and her child's too she was
teaching miss to read and improve her mind for it was the boast of
every tea-table half-hour that miss horton in propriety accent and
emphasis surpassed all the young ladies her age and at other times 
complimenting the pleased mother bless me madam with what a surprising
grace miss horton reads she enters into the very spirit of her subject
 this she could have from nobody but you an intended praise but as
the subjects were would have been a severe satire in the mouth of an
enemy while the fond the inconsiderate mother with a delighted air 
would cry why i cannot but say miss horton does credit to her
tutoress and then a come hither my best love and with a kiss of
approbation what a pleasure to your dear papa had he lived to see your
improvements my charmer concluding with a sigh of satisfaction her
eyes turning round upon the circle to take in all the silent applauses
of theirs but little though the fond the foolish mother what the
plant would be which was springing up from these seeds little imagined
she that her own ruin as well as her child's was to be the consequence
of this fine education and that in the same ill-fated hour the honour
of both mother and daughter was to become a sacrifice to the intriguing
invader 

this the laughing girl when abandoned to her evil destiny and in
company with her sister sally and others each recounting their
settings-out their progress and their fall frequently related to be
her education and manner of training-up 

this and to see a succession of humble servants buzzing about a mother 
who took too much pride in addresses of that kind what a beginning what
an example to a constitution of tinder so prepared to receive the spark
struck from the steely forehead and flinty heart of such a libertine as
at last it was their fortune to be encountered by 

in short as miss grew up under the influences of such a directress and
of books so light and frothy with the inflaming additions of music 
concerts operas plays assemblies balls and the rest of the rabble of
amusements of modern life it is no wonder that like early fruit she
was soon ripened to the hand of the insidious gatherer 

at fifteen she owned she was ready to fancy herself the heroine of every
novel and of every comedy she read so well did she enter into the spirit
of her subject she glowed to become the object of some hero's flame and
perfectly longed to begin an intrigue and even to be run away with by
some enterprising lover yet had neither confinement nor check to
apprehend from her indiscreet mother which she thought absolutely
necessary to constitute a parthenissa 

nevertheless with all these fine modern qualities did she complete her
nineteenth year before she met with any address of consequence one half
of her admirers being afraid because of her gay turn and but middling
fortune to make serious applications for her favour while others were
kept at a distance by the superior airs she assumed and a third sort 
not sufficiently penetrating the foibles either of mother or daughter 
were kept off by the supposed watchful care of the former 

but when the man of intrepidity and intrigue was found never was heroine
so soon subdued never goddess so easily stript of her celestials for 
at the opera a diversion at which neither she nor her mother ever missed
to be present she beheld the specious lovelace beheld him invested with
all the airs of heroic insult resenting a slight affront offered to his
sally martin by two gentlemen who had known her in her more hopeful
state one of whom mr lovelace obliged to sneak away with a broken head 
given with the pummel of his sword the other with a bloody nose neither
of them well supporting that readiness of offence which it seems was a
part of their known character to be guilty of 

the gallantry of this action drawing every by-stander on the side of the
hero o the brave man cried polly horton aloud to her mother in a
kind of rapture how needful the protection of the brave to the fair 
with a softness in her voice which she had taught herself to suit her
fancied high condition of life 

a speech so much in his favour could not but take the notice of a man
who was but too sensible of the advantages which his fine person and
noble air gave him over the gentler hearts who was always watching
every female eye and who had his ear continually turned to every
affected voice for that was one of his indications of a proper subject
to be attempted affectation of every sort he used to say is a certain
sign of a wrong turned head of a faulty judgment and upon such a basis
i seldom build in vain 

he instantly resolved to be acquainted with a young creature who seemed
so strongly prejudiced in his favour never man had a readier invention
for all sorts of mischief he gave his sally her cue he called her
sister in their hearing and sally whisperingly gave the young lady and
her mother in her own way the particulars of the affront she had
received making herself an angel of light to cast the brighter ray upon
the character of her heroic brother she particularly praised his known
and approved courage and mingled with her praises of him such
circumstances relating to his birth his fortune and endowments as left
him nothing to do but to fall in love with the enamoured polly 

mr lovelace presently saw what turn to give his professions so brave a
man yet of manners so gentle hit the young lady's taste nor could she
suspect the heart that such an aspect covered this was the man the
very man she whispered to her mother and when the opera was over his
servant procuring a coach he undertook with his specious sister to set
them down at their own lodgings though situated a quite different way
from his and there were they prevailed upon to alight and partake of a
slight repast 

sally pressed them to return the favour to her at her aunt forbes's and
hoped it would be before her brother went to his own seat 

they promised her and named their evening 

a splendid entertainment was provided the guests came having in the
interim found all that was said of his name and family and fortune to
be true persons of so little strictness in their own morals took it
not into their heads to be very inquisitive after his 

music and dancing had their share in the entertainment these opened
their hearts already half opened by love the aunt forbes and the
lover's sister kept them open by their own example the hero sung 
vowed promised their gratitude was moved their delights were
augmented their hopes increased their confidence was engaged all their
appetites up in arms the rich wines co-operating beat quite off their
guard and not thought enough remaining for so much as suspicion miss 
detached from her mother by sally soon fell a sacrifice to the
successful intriguer 

the widow herself half intoxicated and raised as she was with artful
mixtures and inflamed by love unexpectedly tendered by one of the
libertines his constant companions to whom an opportunity was
contrived to be given to be alone with her and that closely followed by
importunity fell into her daughter's error the consequences of which 
in length of time becoming apparent grief shame remorse seized her
heart her own indiscretion not allowing her to arraign her daughter's 
and she survived not her delivery leaving polly with child likewise 
who when delivered being too fond of the gay deluder to renounce his
company even when she found herself deluded fell into a course of
extravagance and dissoluteness ran through her fortune in a very little
time and as an high preferment at last with sally was admitted a
quarter partner with the detestable sinclair 

all that is necessary to add to the history of these unhappy women will
be comprised in a very little compass 

after the death of the profligate sinclair they kept on the infamous
trade with too much success till an accident happened in the house a
gentleman of family killed in it in a fray contending with another for
a new-vamped face sally was accused of holding the gentleman's arm 
while his more-favoured adversary ran him through the heart and then
made off and she being tried for her life narrowly escaped 

this accident obliged them to break up house-keeping and not having been
frugal enough of their ill-gotten gains lavishing upon one what they
got by another they were compelled for subsistence sake to enter
themselves as under-managers at such another house as their own had been 
in which service soon after sally died of a fever and surfeit got by a
debauch and the other about a month after by a violent cold 
occasioned through carelessness in a salivation 


happier scenes open for the remaining characters for it might be
descending too low to mention the untimely ends of dorcas and of
william mr lovelace's wicked servant and the pining and consumptive
one's of betty barnes and joseph leman unmarried both and in less than
a year after the happy death of their excellent young lady 

the good mrs norton passed the small remainder of her life as happily
as she wished in her beloved foster-daughter's dairy-house as it used
to be called as she wished we repeat for she had too strong
aspirations after another life to be greatly attached to this 

she laid out the greatest part of her time in doing good by her advice 
and by the prudent management of the fund committed to her direction 
having lived an exemplary life from her youth upwards and seen her son
happily settled in the world she departed with ease and calmness 
without pang or agony like a tired traveller falling into a sweet
slumber her last words expressing her hope of being restored to the
child of her bosom and to her own excellent father and mother to whose
care and pains she owed that good education to which she was indebted for
all her other blessings 

the poor's fund which was committed to her care she resigned a week
before her death into the hands of mrs hickman according the direction
of the will and all the accounts and disbursements with it which she
had kept with such an exactness that the lady declares that she will
follow her method and only wishes to discharge the trust as well 

miss howe was not to be persuaded to quit her mourning for her dear
friend until six months were fully expired and then she made mr 
hickman one of the happiest men in the world a woman of her fine sense
and understanding married to a man of virtue and good-nature who had
no past capital errors to reflect upon and to abate his joys and whose
behaviour to mrs hickman is as affectionate as it was respectful to miss
howe could not do otherwise they are already blessed with two fine
children a daughter to whom by joint consent they have given the name
of her beloved friend an a son who bears that of his father 

she has allotted to mr hickman who takes delight in doing good and
that as much for its own sake as to oblige her his part of the
management of the poor's fund to be accountable for it as she
pleasantly says to her she has appropriated every thursday morning for
her part of that management and takes so much delight in the task that
she declares it to be one of the most agreeable of her amusements and
the more agreeable as she teaches every one whom she benefits to bless
the memory of her departed friend to whom she attributes the merit of
all her own charities as well as the honour of those which she dispenses
in pursuance of her will 

she has declared that this fund shall never fail while she lives she
has even engaged her mother to contribute annually to it and mr 
hickman has appropriated twenty pounds a year to the same in
consideration of which she allows him to recommend four objects yearly to
partake of it allows is her style for she assumes the whole
prerogative of dispensing this charity the only prerogative she does or
has occasion to assume in every other case there is but one will
between them and that is generally his or her's as either speaks first 
upon any subject be it what it will mrs hickman she sometimes as
pleasantly as generously tells him must not quite forget that she was
once miss howe because if he had not loved her as such and with all her
foibles she had never been mrs hickman nevertheless she seriously on
all occasions and that to others as well as to himself confesses that
she owes him unreturnable obligations for his patience with her in her
day and for his generous behaviour to her in his 

and still more the highly does she esteem and love him as she reflects
upon his past kindness to her beloved friend and on that dear friend's
good opinion of him nor is it less grateful to her that the worthy
man joins most sincerely with her in all those respectful and
affectionate recollections which make the memory of the departed
precious to survivors 

mr belford was not so destitute of humanity and affection as to be
unconcerned at the unhappy fate of his most intimate friend but when
he reflects upon the untimely ends of several of his companions but just
mentioned in the preceding history on the shocking despondency and
death of his poor friend belton on the signal justice which overtook the
wicked tomlinson on the dreadful exit of the infamous sinclair on the
deep remorses of his more valued friend and on the other hand on the
example set him by the most excellent of her sex and on her blessed
preparation and happy departure and when he considers as he often does
with awe and terror that his wicked habits were so rooted in his
depraved heart that all these warnings and this lovely example seemed
to be but necessary to enable him to subdue them and to reform and that
such awakening-calls are hardly ever afforded to men of his cast or if
they are but seldom attended the full vigour of constitution when he
reflects upon all these things he adores the mercy which through these
calls has snatched him as a brand out of the fire and thinks himself
obliged to make it his endeavours to find out and to reform any of
those who may have been endangered by his means as well as to repair to
the utmost of his power any damage or mischiefs which he may have
occasioned to others 


 see letters xli and lvii of this volume 


with regard to the trust with which he was honoured by the inimitable
lady he had the pleasure of acquitting himself of it in a very few
months to every body's satisfaction even to that of the unhappy family 
who sent him their thanks on the occasion nor was he at delivering up
his accounts contented without resigning the legacy bequeathed to him 
to the uses of the will so that the poor's fund as it is called is
become a very considerable sum and will be a lasting bank for relief of
objects who best deserve relief 

there was but one earthly blessing which remained for mr belford to wish
for in order morally speaking to secure to him all his other
blessings and that was the greatest of all worldly ones a virtuous and
prudent wife so free a liver as he had been he did not think that he
could be worthy of such a one till upon an impartial examination of
himself he found the pleasure he had in his new resolutions so great 
and his abhorrence of his former courses so sincere that he was the less
apprehensive of a deviation 

upon this presumption having also kept in his mind some encouraging
hints from mr lovelace and having been so happy as to have it in his
power to oblige lord m and that whole noble family by some services
grateful to them the request for which from his unhappy friend was
brought over among other papers with the dead body by de la tour he
besought that nobleman's leave to make his addresses to miss charlotte
montague the eldest of his lordship's two nieces and making at the same
time such proposals of settlements as were not objected to his lordship
was pleased to use his powerful interest in his favour and his worthy
niece having no engagement she had the goodness to honour mr belford
with her hand and thereby made him as completely happy as a man can be 
who has enormities to reflect upon which are out of his power to atone
for by reason of the death of some of the injured parties and the
irreclaimableness of others 

happy is the man who in the time of health and strength sees and
reforms the error of his ways but how much more happy is he who has no
capital and wilful errors to repent of how unmixed and sincere must the
joys of such a one come to him 

lord m added bountifully in his life-time as did also the two ladies
his sisters to the fortune of their worthy niece and as mr belford
had been blessed with a son by her his lordship at his death  which
happened just three years after the untimely one of his unhappy nephew 
was pleased to devise to that son and to his descendents for ever and
in case of his death unmarried to any other children of his niece his
hertfordshire estate designed for mr lovelace which he made up to
the value of a moiety of his real estates bequeathing also a moiety
of his personal to the same lady 

miss patty montague a fine young lady  to whom her noble uncle at his
death devised the other moiety of his real and personal estates 
including his seat in berkshire  lives at present with her excellent
sister mrs belford to whom she removed upon lord m s death but in
all probability will soon be the lady of a worthy baronet of ancient
family fine qualities and ample fortunes just returned from his
travels with a character superior to the very good one he set out with 
a case that very seldom happens although the end of travel is
improvement 

colonel morden who with so many virtues and accomplishments cannot be
unhappy in several letters tot eh executor with whom he corresponds
from florence  having since his unhappy affair with mr lovelace
changed his purpose of coming so soon to reside in england as he had
intended   declares that although he thought himself obliged either to
accept of what he took to be a challenge as such or tamely to
acknowledge that he gave up all resentment of his cousin's wrongs and
in a manner to beg pardon for having spoken freely of mr lovelace behind
his back and although at the time he owns he was not sorry to be called
upon as he was to take either the one course or the other yet now 
coolly reflecting upon his beloved cousin's reasonings against duelling 
and upon the price it had too probably cost the unhappy man he wishes he
had more fully considered those words in his cousin's posthumous letter 
if god will allow him time for repentance why should you deny it him  


 several worthy persons have wished that the heinous practice of
duelling had been more forcibly discouraged by way of note at the
conclusion of a work designed to recommend the highest and most important
doctrines of christianity it is humbly presumed that these persons
have not sufficiently attended to what is already done on that subject in
vol ii letter xii and in this volume letter xvi xliii xliv and
xlv 


to conclude the worthy widow lovick continues to live with mr belford 
and by her prudent behaviour piety and usefulness has endeared
herself to her lady and to the whole family 



postscript

referred to in the preface

in which several objections that have been made as well to the
 catastrophe as to different parts of the preceding history 
 are briefly considered 


the foregoing work having been published at three different periods of
time the author in the course of its publication was favoured with
many anonymous letters in which the writers differently expressed their
wishes with regard to the apprehended catastrophe 

most of those directed to him by the gentler sex turned in favour of
what they called a fortunate ending some of the fair writers 
enamoured as they declared with the character of the heroine were
warmly solicitous to have her made happy and others likewise of their
mind insisted that poetical justice required that it should be so and
when says one ingenious lady whose undoubted motive was good-nature and
humanity it must be concluded that it is in an author's power to make
his piece end as he pleases why should he not give pleasure rather than
pain to the reader whom he has interested in favour of his principal
characters 

others and some gentlemen declared against tragedies in general and in
favour of comedies almost in the words of lovelace who was supported in
his taste by all the women at mrs sinclair's and by sinclair herself 
i have too much feeling said he there is enough in the world to make
our hearts sad without carrying grief into our diversions and making
the distresses of others our own 


 see vol iv letter xl 


and how was this happy ending to be brought about why by this very
easy and trite expedient to wit by reforming lovelace and marrying him
to clarissa not however abating her one of her trials nor any of her
sufferings  for the sake of the sport her distresses would give to the
tender-hearted reader as she went along   the last outrage excepted 
that indeed partly in compliment to lovelace himself and partly for
her delicacy-sake they were willing to spare her 

but whatever were the fate of his work the author was resolved to take a
different method he always thought that sudden conversions such 
especially as were left to the candour of the reader to suppose and make
out has neither art nor nature nor even probability in them and that
they were moreover of a very bad example to have a lovelace for a
series of years glory in his wickedness and think that he had nothing
to do but as an act of grace and favour to hold out his hand to receive
that of the best of women whenever he pleased and to have it thought
that marriage would be a sufficient amends for all his enormities to
others as well as to her he could not bear that nor is reformation as
he has shown in another piece to be secured by a fine face by a passion
that has sense for its object nor by the goodness of a wife's heart nor
even example if the heart of the husband be not graciously touched by
the divine finger 

it will be seen by this time that the author had a great end in view 
he had lived to see the scepticism and infidelity openly avowed and even
endeavoured to be propagated from the press the greatest doctrines of
the gospel brought into question those of self-denial and mortification
blotted out of the catalogue of christian virtues and a taste even to
wantonness for out-door pleasure and luxury to the general exclusion of
domestic as well as public virtue industriously promoted among all ranks
and degrees of people 

in this general depravity when even the pulpit has lost great part of
its weight and the clergy are considered as a body of interested men 
the author thought he should be able to answer it to his own heart be
the success what it would if he threw in his mite towards introducing a
reformation so much wanted and he imagined that if in an age given up
to diversion and entertainment if he could steal in as may be said and
investigate the great doctrines of christianity under the fashionable
guise of an amusement he should be most likely to serve his purpose 
remembering that of the poet 

 a verse may find him who a sermon flies 
 and turn delight into a sacrifice 

he was resolved therefore to attempt something that never yet had been
done he considered that the tragic poets have as seldom made their
heroes true objects of pity as the comics theirs laudable ones of
imitation and still more rarely have made them in their deaths look
forward to a future hope and thus when they die they seem totally to
perish death in such instances must appear terrible it must be
considered as the greatest evil but why is death set in such shocking
lights when it is the universal lot 

he has indeed thought fit to paint the death of the wicked as terrible
as he could paint it but he has endeavoured to draw that of the good in
such an amiable manner that the very balaams of the world should not
forbear to wish that their latter end might be like that of the heroine 

and after all what is the poetical justice so much contended for by
some as the generality of writers have managed it but another sort of
dispensation than that with which god by revelation teaches us he has
thought fit to exercise mankind whom placing here only in a state of
probation he hath so intermingled good and evil as to necessitate us to
look forward for a more equal dispensation of both 

the author of the history or rather dramatic narrative of clarissa is
therefore well justified by the christian system in deferring to
extricate suffering virtue to the time in which it will meet with the
completion of its reward 

but not absolutely to shelter the conduct observed in it under the
sanction of religion  an authority perhaps not of the greatest weight
with some of our modern critics   it must be observed that the author is
justified in its catastrophe by the greatest master of reason and best
judge of composition that ever lived the learned reader knows we must
mean aristotle whose sentiments in this matter we shall beg leave to
deliver in the words of a very amiable writer of our own country 

the english writers of tragedy  says mr addison are possessed with
a notion that when they represent a virtuous or innocent person in
distress they ought not to leave him till they have delivered him out of
his troubles or made him triumph over his enemies 


 spectator vol i no xl 


this error they have been led into by a ridiculous doctrine in modern
criticism that they are obliged to an equal distribution of rewards and
punishments and an impartial execution of poetical justice 

who were the first that established this rule i know not but i am sure
it has no foundation in nature in reason or in the practice of the
antients 

we find that good and evil happen alike unto all men on this side the
grave and as the principal design of tragedy is to raise commiseration
and terror in the minds of the audience we shall defeat this great end 
if we always make virtue and innocence happy and successful 

whatever crosses and disappoints a good man suffers in the body of the
tragedy they will make but small impression on our minds when we know 
that in the last act he is to arrive at the end of his wishes and
desires 

when we see him engaged in the depth of his afflictions we are apt to
comfort ourselves because we are sure he will find his way out of them 
and that his grief however great soever it may be at present will soon
terminate in gladness 

for this reason the antient writers of tragedy treated men in their
plays as they are dealt with in the world by making virtue sometimes
happy and sometimes miserable as they found it in the fable which they
made choice of or as it might affect their audience in the most
agreeable manner 

aristotle considers the tragedies that were written in either of those
kinds and observes that those which ended unhappily had always pleased
the people and carried away the prize in the public disputes of the
state from those that ended happily 

terror and commiseration leave a pleasing anguish in the mind and fix
the audience in such a serious composure of thought as is much more
lasting and delightful than any little transient starts of joy and
satisfaction 

accordingly we find that more of our english tragedies have succeeded 
in which the favourites of the audience sink under their calamities than
those in which they recover themselves out of them 

the best plays of this kind are the orphan venice preserved alexander
the great theodosius all for love oedipus oroonoko othello etc 

king lear is an admirable tragedy of the same kind as shakespeare wrote
it but as it is reformed according to the chimerical notion of poetical
justice in my humble opinion it has lost half its beauty 

at the same time i must allow that there are very noble tragedies which
have been framed upon the other plan and have ended happily as indeed
most of the good tragedies which have been written since the starting of
the above-mentioned criticism have taken this turn the mourning bride 
tamerlane ulysses phaedra and hippolitus with most of mr dryden's i
must also allow that many of shakespeare's and several of the
celebrated tragedies of antiquity are cast in the same form i do not 
therefore dispute against this way of writing tragedies but against the
criticism that would establish this as the only method and by that means
would very much cramp the english tragedy and perhaps give a wrong bent
to the genius of our writers 


 yet in tamerlane two of the most amiable characters moneses and
arpasia suffer death 


this subject is further considered in a letter to the spectator 


 see spect vol vii no 548 


i find your opinion  says the author of it concerning the
late-invented term called poetical justice is controverted by some
eminent critics i have drawn up some additional arguments to strengthen
the opinion which you have there delivered having endeavoured to go to
the bottom of that matter 

the most perfect man has vices enough to draw down punishments upon his
head and to justify providence in regard to any miseries that may befall
him for this reason i cannot but think that the instruction and moral
are much finer where a man who is virtuous in the main of his character
falls into distress and sinks under the blows of fortune at the end of
a tragedy than when he is represented as happy and triumphant such an
example corrects the insolence of human nature softens the mind of the
beholder with sentiments of pity and compassion comforts him under his
own private affliction and teaches him not to judge of men's virtues by
their successes i cannot think of one real hero in all antiquity so
far raised above human infirmities that he might not be very naturally
represented in a tragedy as plunged in misfortunes and calamities the
poet may still find out some prevailing passion or indiscretion in his
character and show it in such a manner as will sufficiently acquit
providence of any injustice in his sufferings for as horace observes 
the best man is faulty though not in so great a degree as those whom
we generally call vicious men 


 a caution that our blessed saviour himself gives in the case of the
eighteen person killed by the fall of the tower of siloam luke xiii 4 
 vitiis nemo sine nascitur optimus ille 
 qui minimis urgentur 


if such a strict poetical justice proceeds the letter-writer as some
gentlemen insist upon were to be observed in this art there is no
manner of reason why it should not be so little observed in homer that
his achilles is placed in the greatest point of glory and success though
his character is morally vicious and only poetically good if i may use
the phrase of our modern critics the aenead is filled with innocent
unhappy persons nisus and euryalus lausus and pallas come all to
unfortunate ends the poet takes notice in particular that in the
sacking of troy ripheus fell who was the most just character among the
trojans 

  cadit and ripheus justissimus unus
 qui fuit in teucris and servantissimus aequi 
 diis aliter visum est 

 the gods thought fit so blameless ripheus fell 
 who lov'd fair justice and observ'd it well 

and that pantheus could neither be preserved by his transcendent piety 
nor by the holy fillets of apollo whose priest he was 

  nec te tua plurima pantheu 
 labentum pietas nec apollinis infula texit aen ii 

 nor could thy piety thee pantheus save 
 nor ev'n thy priesthood from an early grave 

i might here mention the practice of antient tragic poets both greek
and latin but as this particular is touched upon in the paper
above-mentioned i shall pass it over in silence i could produce
passages out of aristotle in favour of my opinion and if in one place he
says that an absolutely virtuous man should not be represented as
unhappy this does not justify any one who should think fit to bring in
an absolutely virtuous man upon the stage those who are acquainted with
that author's way of writing know very well that to take the whole
extent of his subject into his divisions of it he often makes use of
such cases as are imaginary and not reducible to practice 

i shall conclude  says this gentleman with observing that though the
spectator above-mentioned is so far against the rule of poetical justice 
as to affirm that good men may meet with an unhappy catastrophe in
tragedy it does not say that ill men may go off unpunished the reason
for this distinction is very plain namely because the best of men  as
is said above   have faults enough to justify providence for any
misfortunes and afflictions which may befall them but there are many men
so criminal that they can have no claim or pretence to happiness the
best of men may deserve punishment but the worst of men cannot deserve
happiness 

mr addison as we have seen above tells us that aristotle in
considering the tragedies that were written in either of the kinds 
observes that those which ended unhappily had always pleased the people 
and carried away the prize in the public disputes of the stage from
those that ended happily and we shall take leave to add that this
preference was given at a time when the entertainments of the stage were
committed to the care of the magistrates when the prizes contended for
were given by the state when of consequence the emulation among
writers was ardent and when learning was at the highest pitch of glory
in that renowned commonwealth 

it cannot be supposed that the athenians in this their highest age of
taste and politeness were less humane less tender-hearted than we of
the present but they were not afraid of being moved nor ashamed of
showing themselves to be so at the distresses they saw well painted and
represented in short they were of the opinion with the wisest of men 
that it was better to go to the house of mourning than to the house of
mirth and had fortitude enough to trust themselves with their own
generous grief because they found their hearts mended by it 

thus also horace and the politest romans in the augustan age wished to
be affected 

 ac ne forte putes me quae facere ipse recusem 
 cum recte tractant alii laudere maligne 
 ille per extentum funem mihi posse videtur
 ire poeta meum qui pectus inaniter angit 
 irritat mulcet falsis terroribus implet 
 ut magus et modo me thebis modo point athenis 

thus englished by mr pope 

 yet lest thou think i rally more than teach 
 or praise malignly arts i cannot reach 
 let me for once presume t'instruct the times
 to know the poet from the man of rhymes 
 tis he who gives my breast a thousand pains 
 can make me feel each passion that he feigns 
 enrage compose with more than magic art 
 with pity and with terror tear my heart 
 and snatch me o'er the earth or through the air 
 to thebes to athens when he will and where 

our fair readers are also desired to attend to what a celebrated critic 
of a neighbouring nation says on the nature and design of tragedy from
the rules laid down by the same great antient 


 rapin on aristotle's poetics 


tragedy  says he makes man modest by representing the great masters
of the earth humbled and it makes him tender and merciful by showing
him the strange accidents of life and the unforeseen disgraces to which
the most important persons are subject 

but because man is naturally timorous and compassionate he may fall
into other extremes too much fear may shake his constancy of mind and
too much of tragedy to regulate these two weaknesses it prepares and
arms him against disgraces by showing them so frequent in the most
considerable persons and he will cease to fear extraordinary accidents 
when he sees them happen to the highest part of mankind and still more
efficacious we may add the example will be when he sees them happen
to the best 

but as the end of tragedy is to teach men not to fear too weakly common
misfortunes it proposes also to teach them to spare their compassion for
objects that deserve it for there is an injustice in being moved at the
afflictions of those who deserve to be miserable we may see without
pity clytemnestra slain by her son orestes in aeschylus because she had
murdered agamemnon her husband yet we cannot see hippolytus die by the
plot of his step-mother phaedra in euripides without compassion because
he died not but for being chaste and virtuous 

these are the great authorities so favourable to the stories that end
unhappily and we beg leave to reinforce this inference from them that
if the temporary sufferings of the virtuous and the good can be accounted
for and justified on pagan principles many more and infinitely stronger
reasons will occur to a christian reader in behalf of what are called
unhappy catastrophes from the consideration of the doctrine of future
rewards which is every where strongly enforced in the history of
clarissa 

of this to give but one instance an ingenious modern distinguished
by his rank but much more for his excellent defence of some of the most
important doctrines of christianity appears convinced in the conclusion
of a pathetic monody lately published in which after he had deplored 
as a man without hope expressing ourselves in the scripture phrase 
the loss of an excellent wife he thus consoles himself 

 yet o my soul thy rising murmurs stay 
 nor dare th' all-wise disposer to arraign 
 or against his supreme decree
 with impious grief complain 
 that all thy full-blown joys at once should fade 
 was his most righteous will and be that will obey'd 
 would thy fond love his grace to her controul 
 and in these low abodes of sin and pain
 her pure exalted soul 
 unjustly for thy partial good detain 
 no rather strive thy grov'ling mind to raise
 up to that unclouded blaze 
 that heav'nly radiance of eternal light 
 in which enthron'd she now with pity sees 
 how frail how insecure how slight 
 is every mortal bliss 

but of infinitely greater weight than all that has been above produced
on this subject are the words of the psalmist 

as for me says he my feet were almost gone my steps had well nigh
slipt for i was envious at the foolish when i saw the prosperity of the
wicked for their strength is firm they are not in trouble as other
men neither are they plagued like other men their eyes stand out with
fatness they have more than their heart could wish verily i have
cleansed mine heart in vain and washed my hands in innocence for all
the day long have i been plagued and chastened every morning when i
thought to know this it was too painful for me until i went into the
sanctuary of god then understood i their end thou shalt guide me with
thy counsel and afterwards receive me to glory 


 psalm lxxiii 


this is the psalmist's comfort and dependence and shall man presuming
to alter the common course of nature and so far as he is able to elude
the tenure by which frail mortality indispensably holds imagine that he
can make a better dispensation and by calling it poetical justice 
indirectly reflect on the divine 

the more pains have been taken to obviate the objections arising from the
notion of poetical justice as the doctrine built upon it had obtained
general credit among us and as it must be confessed to have the
appearance of humanity and good nature for its supports and yet the
writer of the history of clarissa is humbly of opinion that he might
have been excused referring to them for the vindication of his
catastrophe even by those who are advocates for the contrary opinion 
since the notion of poetical justice founded on the modern rules has
hardly ever been more strictly observed in works of this nature than in
the present performance 

for is not mr lovelace who could persevere in his villanous views 
against the strongest and most frequent convictions and remorses that
ever were sent to awaken and reclaim a wicked man is not this great 
this wilful transgressor condignly punished and his punishment brought
on through the intelligence of the very joseph leman whom he had
corrupted and by means of the very woman whom he had debauched is
not mr belton who had an uncle's hastened death to answer for are
not the infamous sinclair and her wretched partners and even the wicked
servants who with their eyes open contributed their parts to the
carrying on of the vile schemes of their respective principals are they
not all likewise exemplarily punished 


 see letter lviii of this volume 
 ibid letter lxi 
 see vol viii letter xvi 


on the other hand is not miss howe for her noble friendship to the
exalted lady in her calamities is not mr hickman for his
unexceptionable morals and integrity of life is not the repentant and
not ungenerous belford is not the worthy norton made signally happy 

and who that are in earnest in their professions of christianity but
will rather envy than regret the triumphant death of clarissa whose
piety from her early childhood whose diffusive charity whose steady
virtue whose christian humility whose forgiving spirit whose meekness 
and resignation heaven only could reward 


 and here it may not be amiss to remind the reader that so early in the
work as vol ii letter xxxviii the dispensations of providence are
justified by herself and thus she ends her reflections i shall not
live always may my closing scene be happy  she had her wish it was
happy 


we shall now according to the expectation given in the preface to this
edition proceed to take brief notice of such other objections as have
come to our knowledge for as is there said this work being addressed
to the public as a history of life and manners those parts of it which
are proposed to carry with them the force of example ought to be as
unobjectionable as is consistent with the design of the whole and with
human nature 

several persons have censured the heroine as too cold in her love too
haughty and even sometimes provoking but we may presume to say that
this objection has arisen from want of attention to the story to the
character of clarissa and to her particular situation 

it was not intended that she should be in love but in liking only if
that expression may be admitted it is meant to be every where
inculcated in the story for example sake that she never would have
married mr lovelace because of his immoralities had she been left to
herself and that of her ruin was principally owing to the persecutions
of her friends 

what is too generally called love ought perhaps as generally to be
called by another name cupidity or a paphian stimulus as some women 
even of condition have acted are not words too harsh to be substituted
on the occasion however grating they may be to delicate ears but take
the word love in the gentlest and most honourable sense it would have
been thought by some highly improbable that clarissa should have been
able to show such a command of her passions as makes so distinguishing
a part of her character had she been as violently in love as certain
warm and fierce spirits would have had her to be a few observations are
thrown in by way of note in the present edition at proper places to
obviate this objection or rather to bespeak the attention of hasty
readers to what lies obviously before them for thus the heroine
anticipates this very objection expostulating with miss howe on her
contemptuous treatment of mr hickman which far from being guilty of
the same fault herself she did on all occasions and declares she would
do so whenever miss howe forgot herself although she had not a day to
live 

o my dear  says she that it had been my lot as i was not permitted
to live single to have met with a man by whom i could have acted
generously and unreservedly 

mr lovelace it is now plain in order to have a pretence against me 
taxed my behaviour to him with stiffness and distance you at one time 
thought me guilty of some degree of prudery difficult situations should
be allowed for which often make seeming occasions for censure
unavoidable i deserved not blame from him who made mine difficult 
and you my dear had i any other man to deal with than mr lovelace or
had he but half the merit which mr hickman has would have found that
my doctrine on this subject should have governed my whole practice 
see this whole letter no xxxii vol viii see also mr lovelace's
letter vol viii no lix and vol ix no xlii where just before his
death he entirely acquits her conduct on this head 

it has been thought by some worthy and ingenious persons that if
lovelace had been drawn an infidel or scoffer his character according
to the taste of the present worse than sceptical age would have been
more natural it is however too well known that there are very many
persons of his cast whose actions discredit their belief and are not
the very devils in scripture said to believe and tremble 

but the reader must have observed that great and it is hoped good
use has been made throughout the work by drawing lovelace an infidel 
only in practice and this as well in the arguments of his friend
belford as in his own frequent remorses when touched with temporary
compunction and in his last scenes which could not have been made had
either of them been painted as sentimental unbelievers not to say that
clarissa whose great objection to mr wyerley was that he was a
scoffer must have been inexcusable had she known lovelace to be so and
had given the least attention to his addresses on the contrary thus
she comforts herself when she thinks she must be his this one
consolation however remains he is not an infidel an unbeliever had
he been an infidel there would have been no room at all for hope of him 
but priding himself as he does in his fertile invention he would have
been utterly abandoned irreclaimable and a savage  and it must be
observed that scoffers are too witty in their own opinion in other
words value themselves too much upon their profligacy to aim at
concealing it 


 see vol iv letter xxxix and vol v letter viii 


besides had lovelace added ribbald jests upon religion to his other
liberties the freedoms which would then have passed between him and his
friend must have been of a nature truly infernal 

and this father hint was meant to be given by way of inference that the
man who allowed himself in those liberties either of speech or action 
which lovelace thought shameful was so far a worse man than lovelace 
for this reason he is every where made to treat jests on sacred things
and subjects even down to the mythology of the pagans among pagans as
undoubted marks of the ill-breeding of the jester obscene images and
talk as liberties too shameful for even rakes to allow themselves in 
and injustice to creditors and in matters of meum and tuum as what it
was beneath him to be guilty of 

some have objected to the meekness to the tameness as they will have it
to be of mr hickman's character and yet lovelace owns that he rose
upon him with great spirit in the interview between them once when he
thought a reflection was but implied on miss howe and another time 
when he imagined himself treated contemptuously miss howe it must be
owned though not to the credit of her own character treats him
ludicrously on several occasions but so she does her mother and
perhaps a lady of her lively turn would have treated as whimsically any
man but a lovelace mr belford speaks of him with honour and
respect so does colonel morden and so does clarissa on every
occasion and all that miss howe herself says of him tends more to his
reputation than discredit as clarissa indeed tells her 


 see vol vii letter xxviii 
 ibid 
 ibid letter xlviii 
 see letter xlvi of this volume 
 see vol ii letter ii and vol iii letter xl 
 see vol ii letter xi 


and as to lovelace's treatment of him the reader must have observed 
that it was his way to treat every man with contempt partly by way of
self-exaltation and partly to gratify the natural gaiety of his
disposition he says himself to belford thou knowest i love him not 
jack and whom we love not we cannot allow a merit to perhaps not the
merit they should be granted  modest and diffident men  writes
belford to lovelace in praise of mr hickman wear not soon off those
little precisenesses which the confident if ever they had them 
presently get over  


 see vol vii letter xxviii 
 ibid letter xlviii 


but as miss howe treats her mother as freely as she does her lover so
does mr lovelace take still greater liberties with mr belford than he
does with mr hickman with respect to his person air and address as
mr belford himself hints to mr hickman and yet is he not so readily
believed to the discredit of mr belford by the ladies in general as he
is when he disparages mr hickman whence can this particularity arise 


 see letter xxxvi of this volume 


mr belford had been a rake but was in a way of reformation 

mr hickman had always been a good man 

and lovelace confidently says that the women love a man whose regard for
 them is founded in the knowledge of them 


 see vol v letter xviii 


nevertheless it must be owned that it was not purposed to draw mr 
hickman as the man of whom the ladies in general were likely to be very
fond had it been so goodness of heart and gentleness of manners 
great assiduity and inviolable and modest love would not of themselves
have been supposed sufficient recommendations he would not have been
allowed the least share of preciseness or formality although those
defects might have been imputed to his reverence for the object of his
passion but in his character it was designed to show that the same man
could not be every thing and to intimate to ladies that in choosing
companions for life they should rather prefer the honest heart of a
hickman which would be all their own than to risk the chance of
sharing perhaps with scores and some of those probably the most
profligate of the sex the volatile mischievous one of a lovelace in
short that they should choose if they wished for durable happiness for
rectitude of mind and not for speciousness of person or address nor
make a jest of a good man in favour of a bad one who would make a jest
of them and of their whole sex 

two letters however by way of accommodation are inserted in this
edition which perhaps will give mr hickman's character some heightening
with such ladies as love spirit in a man and had rather suffer by it 
than not meet with it 

 women born to be controul'd 
 stoop to the forward and the bold 

says waller and lovelace too 


some have wished that the story had been told in the usual narrative way
of telling stories designed to amuse and divert and not in letters
written by the respective persons whose history is given in them the
author thinks he ought not to prescribe to the taste of others but
imagined himself at liberty to follow his own he perhaps mistrusted his
talents for the narrative kind of writing he had the good fortune to
succeed in the epistolary way once before a story in which so many
persons were concerned either principally or collaterally and of
characters and dispositions so various carried on with tolerable
connection and perspicuity in a series of letters from different
persons without the aid of digressions and episodes foreign to the
principal end and design he thought had novelty to be pleaded for it 
and that in the present age he supposed would not be a slight
recommendation 

besides what has been said above and in the preface on this head the
following opinion of an ingenious and candid foreigner on this manner of
writing may not be improperly inserted here 

the method which the author had pursued in the history of clarissa is
the same as in the life of pamela both are related in familiar letters
by the parties themselves at the very time in which the events happened 
and this method has given the author great advantages which he could not
have drawn from any other species of narration the minute particulars
of events the sentiments and conversation of the parties are upon this
plan exhibited with all the warmth and spirit that the passion supposed
to be predominant at the very time could produce and with all the
distinguishing characteristics which memory can supply in a history of
recent transactions 

romances in general and marivaux's amongst others are wholly
improbable because they suppose the history to be written after the
series of events is closed by the catastrophe a circumstance which
implies a strength of memory beyond all example and probability in the
persons concerned enabling them at the distance of several years to
relate all the particulars of a transient conversation or rather it
implies a yet more improbable confidence and familiarity between all
these persons and the author 

there is however one difficulty attending the epistolary method for
it is necessary that all the characters should have an uncommon taste for
this kind of conversation and that they should suffer no event not even
a remarkable conversation to pass without immediately committing it to
writing but for the preservation of the letters once written the
author has provided with great judgment so as to render this
circumstance highly probable  


 this quotation is translated from a critique on the history of
clarissa written in french and published at amsterdam the whole
critique rendered into english was inserted in the gentleman's magazine
of june and august 1749 the author has done great honour in it to the
history of clarissa and as there are remarks published with it which
answer several objections made to different passages in the story by that
candid foreigner the reader is referred to the aforesaid magazine for
both 


it is presumed that what this gentleman says of the difficulties
attending a story thus given in the epistolary manner of writing will
not be found to reach the history before us it is very well accounted
for in it how the two principal female characters came to take so great
a delight in writing their subjects are not merely subjects of
amusement but greatly interesting to both yet many ladies there are who
now laudably correspond when at distance from each other on occasions
that far less affect their mutual welfare and friendships than those
treated of by these ladies the two principal gentlemen had motives of
gaiety and vain-glory for their inducements it will generally be found 
that persons who have talents for familiar writing as these
correspondents are presumed to have will not forbear amusing themselves
with their pens on less arduous occasions than what offer to these 
these four whose stories have a connection with each other out of the
great number of characters who are introduced in this history are only
eminent in the epistolary way the rest appear but as occasional writers 
and as drawn in rather by necessity than choice from the different
relations in which they stand with the four principal persons 

the length of the piece has been objected to by some who perhaps looked
upon it as a mere novel or romance and yet of these there are not
wanting works of equal length 

they were of opinion that the story moved too slowly particularly in
the first and second volumes which are chiefly taken up with the
altercations between clarissa and the several persons of her family 

but is it not true that those altercations are the foundation of the
whole and therefore a necessary part of the work the letters and
conversations where the story makes the slowest progress are presumed
to be characteristic they give occasion likewise to suggest many
interesting personalities in which a good deal of the instruction
essential to a work of this nature is conveyed and it will moreover 
be remembered that the author at his first setting out apprized the
reader that the story interesting as it is generally allowed to be was
to be principally looked upon as the vehicle to the instruction 

to all which we may add that there was frequently a necessity to be very
circumstantial and minute in order to preserve and maintain that air of
probability which is necessary to be maintained in a story designed to
represent real life and which is rendered extremely busy and active by
the plots and contrivances formed and carried on by one of the principal
characters 

some there are and ladies too who have supposed that the excellencies
of the heroine are carried to an improbable and even to an
impracticable height in this history but the education of clarissa 
from early childhood ought to be considered as one of her very great
advantages as indeed the foundation of all her excellencies and it
is to be hoped for the sake of the doctrine designed to be inculcated by
it that it will 

she had a pious a well-read a not meanly-descended woman for her nurse 
who with her milk as mrs harlowe says gave her that nurture which no
other nurse could give her she was very early happy in the
conversation-visits of her learned and worthy dr lewen and in her
correspondencies not with him only but with other divines mentioned in
her last will her mother was upon the whole a good woman who did
credit to her birth and fortune and both delighted in her for those
improvements and attainments which gave her and them in her a
distinction that caused it to be said that when she was out of the
family it was considered but as a common family she was moreover a
country lady and as we have seen in miss howe's character of her 
took great delight in rural and household employments though qualified
to adorn the brightest circle 


 see vol iv letter xxviii 
 see her mother's praises of her to mrs norton vol i letter xxxix 
 see letter lv of this volume 


it must be confessed that we are not to look for clarissa's name among
the constant frequenters of ranelagh and vauxhall nor among those who
may be called daughters of the card-table if we do the character of
our heroine may then indeed only be justly thought not improbable but
unattainable but we have neither room in this place nor inclination 
to pursue a subject so invidious we quit it therefore after we have
repeated that we know there are some and we hope there are many in the
british dominions or they are hardly any where in the european world 
who as far as occasion has called upon them to exert the like humble and
modest yet steady and useful virtues have reached the perfections of a
clarissa 

having thus briefly taken notice of the most material objections that
have been made to different parts of this history it is hoped we may be
allowed to add that had we thought ourselves at liberty to give copies
of some of the many letters that have been written on the other side of
the question that is to say in approbation of the catastrophe and of
the general conduct and execution of the work by some of the most
eminent judges of composition in every branch of literature most of what
has been written in this postscript might have been spared 

but as the principal objection with many has lain against the length of
the piece we shall add to what we have said above on that subject in
the words of one of those eminent writers that if in the history
before us it shall be found that the spirit is duly diffused throughout 
that the characters are various and natural well distinguished and
uniformly supported and maintained if there be a variety of incidents
sufficient to excite attention and those so conducted as to keep the
reader always awake the length then must add proportionably to the
pleasure that every person of taste receives from a well-drawn picture
of nature but where the contrary of all these qualities shock the
understanding the extravagant performance will be judged tedious though
no longer than a fairy-tale 

finis
